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September 22, 2025 44 mins

This week, Chris and Karen talk about smoking doctors, Esprit outlets and more!

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Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:02):
Are you leaving? I you wanna way back home?

Speaker 2 (00:06):
Either way, we want to be there.

Speaker 1 (00:10):
Doesn't matter how much baggage you claim and give us
time and a termino and gage.

Speaker 2 (00:19):
We want to send you off in style. We wanna
welcome you back home.

Speaker 3 (00:27):
Tell us all about it.

Speaker 1 (00:28):
We scared her? Was it fine?

Speaker 4 (00:32):
Now?

Speaker 1 (00:32):
Porn? Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride?

(00:52):
Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride?
Do you need to ride? Do your need to ride?

Speaker 3 (01:01):
To ride with Karen and Chris? Welcome to Do you
need to ride? This is Chris.

Speaker 1 (01:17):
Fairmank and this is Karen Tilgara.

Speaker 2 (01:19):
How are you?

Speaker 3 (01:19):
How's your days so far? It's been so long?

Speaker 1 (01:22):
Hey stranger? He Hi, honey, how are you? I'm fine.
I'm you know, it feels like I haven't seen you
in three months.

Speaker 3 (01:33):
It's definitely been close to a month.

Speaker 1 (01:37):
It's crazy, it is. How have you been.

Speaker 4 (01:40):
I'm great. The day has been great so far. And
I knew it was great from the get go because
I spilled it. I bought a twelve dollars green juice,
went out to my car and just somehow my arm
flung it in the air and I immediately laughed rather
than yelled an explotive and screamed into a pillow.

Speaker 3 (02:03):
I carry a pillow with me for screaming.

Speaker 1 (02:06):
But you didn't have to use it.

Speaker 3 (02:07):
No, it's so. That's always a good sign.

Speaker 4 (02:10):
Yes, that's like, Oh, my mental health is in a
good place where I laugh.

Speaker 3 (02:14):
It's spilled juice.

Speaker 1 (02:15):
I mean, especially when that juice cost twenty six Goddamn
dog it was.

Speaker 3 (02:20):
It was a high end juice.

Speaker 4 (02:21):
The more I'm thinking about it now, the more I'm
getting upset.

Speaker 1 (02:24):
You you can get upset now. Yeah, this is the
time to do it.

Speaker 4 (02:28):
It's been hours that happened this morning, and it's still
eating away with me.

Speaker 3 (02:32):
God damn it.

Speaker 4 (02:32):
Here I go again with the anger. We're getting a
coffee because we need it.

Speaker 1 (02:36):
Yeah, we need it. Sorry, thank you, thank you very much.

Speaker 4 (02:46):
It would be funny after that riveting juice story if
I flung this coffee onto my lap.

Speaker 1 (02:54):
You've oh wait, let me turn the Sacy down for
sound purposes. You've heard my story about being in my
old Honda fit the tiny car with my friend Vicky.

Speaker 3 (03:05):
I remember that car.

Speaker 1 (03:06):
Fondly is a class Oh yeah, I mean it launched
this podcast.

Speaker 3 (03:11):
Yes, so I.

Speaker 1 (03:12):
Think I've told you this please genuinely stop me. People
say that all the time, stop me if you've heard this,
but they don't mean it right.

Speaker 3 (03:18):
They're usually just singing that Smith's song.

Speaker 1 (03:22):
Yeah, that's right, and if you did interrupt them, they'd
be furious. Yes, so so yeah. So I worked with VICKI,
so we used to walk around my neighborhood like at
six am before we'd go to work, and then she'd
get ready at my house. I'd obviously get ready at
my house and then we drive to work together. And

(03:44):
this one morning we get we go and blow dright
our hair and separate bathrooms and did it. I get
it all done, jump into the car. I grabed one
of my drinkable yogurts that I love so much, and
as we're in the car talking about something, I go
to shake my yogurt up forgetting that I'd already taken
the kapla.

Speaker 3 (04:02):
Oh no.

Speaker 1 (04:03):
So I just basically just for it. It looked like,
for no reason, just went like this with my yogurt
and went crazy inside the car.

Speaker 4 (04:12):
None of it got on you, It all got on her,
it all got everywhere.

Speaker 1 (04:15):
It was the craziest like because it was like that
hardshake of like trying to move the yogurt in the bottle,
but instead it was just like immediately everywhere, and she
was just kind of like, what are you do? Like,
what are you doing?

Speaker 3 (04:28):
So she didn't have she didn't immediately laugh.

Speaker 1 (04:33):
Well, I mean it was shocking. We both were like,
oh my god, what just happened? We were attacked and
that was like we were attacked by me.

Speaker 3 (04:40):
Oh that's terrific. And the yogurt. It's such a good
thing to leave in your.

Speaker 1 (04:45):
Car, Yeah, to get nice and hot.

Speaker 3 (04:47):
All deal with that after summer in.

Speaker 1 (04:51):
I'll deal with that when the pumpkins come.

Speaker 3 (04:54):
Oh that's another thing you can't leave too long.

Speaker 1 (04:58):
M m, not in your car.

Speaker 4 (05:01):
Yes, it's almost time that I start talking about Halloween,
but not quite yet.

Speaker 3 (05:06):
Not quite yet.

Speaker 4 (05:07):
I haven't even thought about costumes or what I'm gonna carve.

Speaker 1 (05:11):
No, that's you were still in summer.

Speaker 3 (05:13):
Yes, I mean.

Speaker 1 (05:15):
This episode does come out in late September or so.

Speaker 3 (05:17):
Oh yeah, it'll be closed it.

Speaker 4 (05:20):
I just I don't start talking about it until I'm
thinking about it.

Speaker 1 (05:23):
We have to really, and I say we, because I
feel alone in how I can't track time anymore. Mm hmm.
Also I immediately gave myself a terrible ice cream headache
with that fucking thing.

Speaker 4 (05:38):
M it will pass and you'll become a better person.
God damn it, and you're back.

Speaker 1 (05:46):
Oh they say, rub your tongue on the ref your
mouth to make it go away.

Speaker 3 (05:51):
Really, it's kind of not going. I think that seems
like a distractionary thing.

Speaker 1 (05:56):
I think it is.

Speaker 4 (05:59):
Like when they my dad said, they used to spank
him on the bottom before he got an inoculation of
some kind.

Speaker 1 (06:07):
Oh, so double pain.

Speaker 4 (06:08):
So doctor slapped your butt and you're like, why the
hell did you slap my butt? And before you know that,
then the needle's already out.

Speaker 1 (06:16):
Gross.

Speaker 3 (06:17):
Yeah, it is gross. Doctors did weird.

Speaker 1 (06:19):
Stop they were gross and weird.

Speaker 3 (06:21):
He probably had a lit cigarette in his mouth.

Speaker 1 (06:23):
Yeah, and he was trying to get your dad to
smoke as a child.

Speaker 3 (06:26):
Yeah, it was a simpler time and it worked. I remembered.

Speaker 1 (06:30):
At least he didn't throw yogurt on your dad.

Speaker 4 (06:33):
My friend, I didn't know my dad ever had cigarettes.
This I have talked about before, but it's a weird thing.

Speaker 3 (06:41):
I'm going to ask you to not stop me.

Speaker 1 (06:44):
Oh okay, her, it's been so long. No you got
to say it.

Speaker 4 (06:51):
The people have teenagers since I've mentioned this story, they
have babies that are now teenagers. Great, and it's not
that good, so you won't even remember it. I didn't
make an impact the first time. Okay, let's see, I
did not know my dad smoked, but all my friends
did because they would see him outside of the courthouse

(07:12):
where he worked, and we would skateboard and he would
like be out there smoking.

Speaker 1 (07:17):
Cigarettes, like a little sneaky smoke.

Speaker 4 (07:20):
Yeah, and I and when I discovered that he had cigarettes,
my friends were like, oh, yeah, we knew he smoked.
He's smoking outside the courthouse, Like, or why how did
I not know this?

Speaker 3 (07:31):
How am I the last to learn?

Speaker 1 (07:33):
Was he ashamed? Well?

Speaker 3 (07:35):
I didn't ever and still to this day, have not
confronted him.

Speaker 1 (07:38):
It was just a brief period this Christmas.

Speaker 3 (07:41):
Yeah, the bank. Yeah, I'm going to take it to
the table. Dad.

Speaker 4 (07:45):
What was with all your cigarettes and lightweight leather jackets?

Speaker 1 (07:49):
Wait? What did he do at the courthouse?

Speaker 3 (07:51):
He was the.

Speaker 4 (07:53):
County tax assessor, holy shit, in charge of the for
their Department of revenue.

Speaker 1 (08:01):
But for many counties, I thought that the Jim Fairbanks
was a radio man. First and foremost.

Speaker 4 (08:08):
It's funny that that was only for a brief period
of time until this dumb baby name Chris came along,
and it's like I got to make more money, and
so we moved back to Montana and he had been
appraising properties as one of his one dozen jobs at once.

Speaker 1 (08:28):
Did he have to run for office?

Speaker 4 (08:31):
I think it is an elected position in a lot
of states, he said, But his was just he had
the job.

Speaker 3 (08:38):
And had it forever.

Speaker 4 (08:39):
Oh that's cool because no one came along to say
I'm better at this.

Speaker 1 (08:43):
You gotta love a solid government job. I mean, like
there's the benefits and like the security.

Speaker 4 (08:50):
I think even he didn't appreciate until he retired, like, oh,
this is a pretty sweet deal.

Speaker 1 (08:57):
And then he has a pension that after. I mean,
my dad, of course, is completely torn asunder from being
a fireman. He cann't hear anything. He's had many hip surgeries,
the whole nine, right, But I think he's still getting paid.
Like the pension that you make when you do a
job like that is worth it. Yeah, I mean it's

(09:19):
worth it to me, the person who didn't have to
do it, Yes, exactly, So your sacrifice was so worth it.

Speaker 3 (09:26):
From a distance as you're a child. That was so worthy.
Got me some of that sweet retirement allowance.

Speaker 1 (09:32):
Daddy, Yeah, I got to get I got to wear
Ispree clothing at will because my dad was a fireman.

Speaker 4 (09:39):
We of course talked, did you used to go to
the spree outlet and dig through bins?

Speaker 1 (09:44):
I went there once because my parents had a real
hatred of driving into the city. That was just a
thing that they really took offense to.

Speaker 3 (09:53):
It was like, get it, I get it.

Speaker 1 (09:54):
They acted like they were crossing the Great Plains. So
we went once, and I was obsessed with will I
be discovered as a model? Oh at the moment you
walk in, yes, because that was the biggest Brie thing
is they use local girls where it's like, oh, okay,
you're neither tall, nor thin, nor especially stand out pretty

(10:16):
as opposed to anyone else in this building. Why do
you think you're going to get?

Speaker 3 (10:19):
You said that to you.

Speaker 1 (10:20):
I'm just saying the realist in the childhood me. But
that wasn't hadn't said upon me yet, so I was
just kind of like it could be me, and then
it's like, okay, Well it made a very disappointing day
of shopping at theustery outlet because I didn't get discovered,
Like that's the I kind of set myself up like
that all the time, where it's like maybe now is

(10:41):
when I get discovered, and it's like, no, you're just
at the grocery store with your mom.

Speaker 4 (10:45):
Yeah, I didn't know. In Montana, no one got discovered.
So it never was eating away at me. Well that's
good until now I try.

Speaker 3 (10:55):
And desperately post stand up videos.

Speaker 4 (10:59):
I've experienced it now as I've become amateur editor.

Speaker 3 (11:05):
But yeah, it was. I swear half the reason.

Speaker 4 (11:11):
Vacation was excited was so I could vicariously enjoy the
spree store. No one said, hey, they don't really have
clothes for you, even though they say they'll come up
as your sister's digging through a bin. Yeah, tell you,
these are clothes for everyone. Unisex was the going phrase.

Speaker 1 (11:29):
Yeah, but god, that's like that's for you. Did want
to pink? Oh well those were cool.

Speaker 3 (11:36):
Yeah, that's the coolest.

Speaker 1 (11:39):
What's the boys? When I was in high school war
pink and it was very much like the izod you
know trend.

Speaker 3 (11:46):
Yeah, there wasn't a lot of hey I'm different. At
my high school. It was like you you played football
and you join the Marines.

Speaker 1 (11:57):
You better.

Speaker 3 (12:00):
I did neither.

Speaker 1 (12:02):
Look, your anecdote about your dad smoking was very revealing
about your dad, which is great.

Speaker 3 (12:09):
Yes he had secrets.

Speaker 1 (12:10):
He had secrets. Yes, everyone contains multitudes. And then but
on top of it, I don't remember you ever saying that. Ever.
I feel like, because I love local governmental jobs like
a tax assessor or a comptroller, I feel like I
would have remembered if you told me that story.

Speaker 4 (12:28):
Yeah, yeah, it's he always told me before I learned
well into my career that he wrote jokes for other
comedians and wrote jokes for radio, and a lot of
his stories even came from that. And I didn't know
that he dealt with other comics, but I, yeah, I didn't.

(12:53):
I didn't know much about his job until later in life,
and now he's still does it. Sometimes in retirement, you
measure a building, You figure out the mean value of
surrounding buildings, and then you come up with what it's

(13:13):
worth for the purposes of assessed taxing it assessing those
taxes like property taxes. So people were always coming in
threatening him and their overalls.

Speaker 3 (13:26):
My taxes are too high.

Speaker 1 (13:27):
M oh.

Speaker 4 (13:29):
He always said he used humor all the time, and
I always wondered, how like if there's a big tax
appeal hearing and there's Texas lawyers there and it's about
some property.

Speaker 3 (13:39):
He would always use jokes and said, no matter what
you do, humor will help.

Speaker 4 (13:47):
And I like, what if I'm a comic he' said,
I don't know. That's just up to how many followers
do you have?

Speaker 3 (13:52):
That's what he said. I didn't get it back then.

Speaker 1 (13:54):
He said, how much can you tear a heckler a
new one?

Speaker 3 (13:59):
Yes? That h oh man. I think that's going away
a little bit.

Speaker 4 (14:05):
I just did a show in the middle of Pennsylvania
in Homage Country for a bunch of adult skateboarders at camp.

Speaker 3 (14:16):
I went to camp.

Speaker 4 (14:17):
It brought back all these memories, except I was afraid
someone had come up and start talking to me about
the Bible.

Speaker 3 (14:23):
But no one did because it was skate camp and
we had a.

Speaker 4 (14:27):
Show and it was so much fun and not one
per I mean they all listened.

Speaker 3 (14:32):
There was not one peep from anyone.

Speaker 1 (14:34):
Sorry, this is what you're telling me about the you're singing? No.

Speaker 4 (14:38):
After I sang at a camp in Oregon, I did
stand up up in Pennsylvania Woodward skate Camp. It used
to be a gymnastics in skateboarding camp.

Speaker 1 (14:50):
Wait, can I just start you over and Saya, will
you tell us how the concert went?

Speaker 4 (14:56):
Oh, yes, this has all happened since I've seen you.

Speaker 3 (15:00):
Yes, thank you.

Speaker 1 (15:01):
Let's start most important. Then we can go back down
through shows.

Speaker 3 (15:05):
See they've actually to me.

Speaker 4 (15:07):
The thing that I was most excited about was doing
stand up for two hundred campers and that was very fun, amazing.

Speaker 3 (15:15):
I loved it so much. And that's what just happened.

Speaker 4 (15:18):
But prior to that, I got a little practice from
performing for an adult skate camp.

Speaker 3 (15:25):
Up in Oregon near Mount.

Speaker 1 (15:26):
Hood, and that's the one we were talking about.

Speaker 4 (15:28):
Yeah, that that one was the music that was playing
the songs and everyone skated around us and it was
very cool.

Speaker 1 (15:36):
It was cool and how did your voice?

Speaker 3 (15:40):
It was a just work the book, Thank you? It
was great.

Speaker 4 (15:43):
I did an errant skateboard, flew through the air and
hit it. I think I think knocked it to a
different setting. So all of a sudden, for three songs,
I had some some setting that just gave me a
little slap echo beyond my voice because so it gave
it some depth and it turned it into an auto

(16:06):
tuned Share disaster, a robotic like I did Descendants, a
punk song, and it when I was singing a little
higher went it jumped up robotically for effect for you know,
old town road hip hop. I don't know what setting
it was, because each setting is a song. Yeah, Share

(16:28):
Believe in Love is a setting.

Speaker 1 (16:31):
Oh that's that's smart.

Speaker 4 (16:32):
I use Phil Collins in the air tonight for some
punk song. They're just it just the more I sang
into it each one, despite whose name was on it
helped with a different song and just made it sound
more dynamic.

Speaker 3 (16:46):
I've been using the word dynamic.

Speaker 1 (16:48):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (16:49):
And it was so fun and it was cool to
have the confidence of like, oh, this setting is going
to I will hear it in the monitor and be
able to kind of use it to sound more like
the artists, because I wanted it to sound like each song.

Speaker 3 (17:06):
And it was so fun.

Speaker 4 (17:08):
And when it got too dark to skate, they all
watched and it just really felt like a bucket list
type of event.

Speaker 1 (17:16):
That's great, and I got to go to camp up there. Yeah.
I mean it seems like you're hitting a lot of
camps these days.

Speaker 3 (17:23):
I wanted to become a regular thing.

Speaker 4 (17:26):
If there is stand up comedy entertainment or a skate
rock band, please bring Chris Fairbanks or the Curb Dogs
to your skateboard camp.

Speaker 1 (17:37):
Please.

Speaker 4 (17:38):
There are some major camps. There's a few Woodward camps.
I'm I'm, We're in talks.

Speaker 1 (17:44):
And Woodward Sorry is the company that runs down.

Speaker 4 (17:47):
Yeah, doing a little It's been around since the seventies.
It was like strictly gymnastics, I think, and now there's
parkour and skateboarding, but it's mostly a skateboarding camp now.

Speaker 3 (18:02):
And it was so vast.

Speaker 4 (18:05):
There was like you imagine a skate park that you've
seen or driven by. Did each one there and there
was a dozen of them in facilities or outside was
three times each one was three times the size of
a normal skate park. It was just almost overwhelming, like
I didn't even the.

Speaker 3 (18:26):
Touch half of them.

Speaker 4 (18:28):
It was and at my age to wake up early
in the morning and know, Okay, I'm gonna skate all
day for four days was it was scary. I thought
maybe I physically wouldn't be able to do it. But
I had a great time and I loved it.

Speaker 1 (18:45):
Were you planning to push yourself to the limits, no
matter wh was.

Speaker 4 (18:48):
And of course was a little disappointed because you know me,
I mostly skate curbs and this was big drop in balls,
giant Tonyawk style vert ramps.

Speaker 1 (18:59):
And and you just did it. You dropped right in.

Speaker 3 (19:02):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (19:02):
There is a mega ramp where you go down a
huge thing and fly through the air and land on
a landing. And then there's a twenty foot quarter pipe
that I climbed up there and I'm like, oh, I
wouldn't even roll down. This is not going to happen
for me. But the whole time leading up to it,
I'm like, I wonder what tricks I'll be able to
do off that.

Speaker 1 (19:21):
Wait, so if you when you fly in the air,
you have to hold the skateboard, so when you land,
you're still doing stuff.

Speaker 4 (19:27):
Skate wanted to grab it, yeah, but I didn't. Even
They have a thing that launches you into a pit
of foam blocks. Yeah, and right away just smelling it,
I'm like, I'm going to get a staph infection. That's
where I That's where my brain goes now correctly, Yeah,
because it was not it would be very hard to
clean it. Imagine an absorbent but giant McDonald's ballpit.

Speaker 1 (19:51):
Yeah, no things.

Speaker 3 (19:52):
And usually kids go to camp and hey, you know, filthy.

Speaker 1 (19:55):
Children are filthy. They love to randomly peece.

Speaker 4 (19:59):
Yes always, they're always pain uh and uh.

Speaker 3 (20:03):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (20:04):
So I didn't do what I thought, but I still
had so much fun.

Speaker 3 (20:09):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (20:13):
The second camp I went to in Pennsylvania that was
in the middle of note like every airport was at
least four hours away except the tiny one.

Speaker 3 (20:23):
I flew direct there and.

Speaker 4 (20:26):
Immediately saw Amish folks and wagons, horse drawn wagons, and
there was kids in the back of this wagon on
the way to camp that were signaling with a lantern
like they were full on no electricity family.

Speaker 3 (20:41):
Yeah, a lot of them.

Speaker 4 (20:42):
You'll see Amish people in a store or they have
a cell phone, like they're like, okay, let's adaptly, be
adapt a little, but they are hardcore where and these
kids were holding a red piece of plexiglass in front
of the lantern like laughing, Hey we're signaling.

Speaker 1 (21:00):
That was their turn signal.

Speaker 4 (21:01):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know. I wish I got to
get those ray ban glasses that film everything, because so creepy,
so great to capture.

Speaker 1 (21:11):
Do you know There's a woman I saw on TikTok
who was like, I was getting I was getting waxed
at the European Wax Center and the girl had those
on and I didn't realize it until the end, and
I said, wait a second, are you wearing those recording glasses?
And she's like, oh, yeah, but they're not on right now.

Speaker 3 (21:29):
Oh weird, And she was.

Speaker 1 (21:31):
Like I'm so uncomfortable, And everyone in the credits was
like absolutely, sue those people, like this is absolutely not acceptable, inappropriate, insane,
Like there's no world where that should have happened to you, Like,
isn't that crazy?

Speaker 4 (21:47):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (21:48):
It is, it is.

Speaker 4 (21:49):
I wouldn't be too worried about a woman using them maliciously,
but I guess.

Speaker 1 (21:57):
I was those types of people, there's no And also
those women make money off of that contraband video, like
you're a sociopath, you're a sociopath.

Speaker 4 (22:07):
Yeah, there's always the Jislaine Maxwell's, well, never know how
to say it, and I won't honor it's denunciation.

Speaker 1 (22:14):
Jizl's did you dare give that name the respect?

Speaker 4 (22:18):
Listen, Sizzeline, take it out of your bacon. I'm Sizeline Maxwell.
That would be funny, But what's the shirt.

Speaker 1 (22:25):
First day move over Bacon. I'm Jeffrey Epstein's girlfriend, Gisellaine Maxwell.

Speaker 3 (22:31):
Take a seat, egg dick.

Speaker 4 (22:37):
Oh god, I always have all these good T shirt
ideas and then I forget them.

Speaker 1 (22:41):
I know you should re listen to this entire catalog
and write them all down on a piece of paper.

Speaker 3 (22:47):
Yeah I could. I could. I make millions, although I'm
not a big joke T shirt guy myself.

Speaker 4 (22:54):
No, you know, I'll wear a logo or something with
art on it, but I'm not a big, you know,
federal be KINI inspector type guy.

Speaker 1 (23:03):
I think that's best.

Speaker 3 (23:05):
It is for the best.

Speaker 4 (23:06):
Oh yeah, I do have my shirt that is a
playoff of skateboarding is not a crime, and it's a
skateboarding is a crime, and it's loud and hurts my ears.
Can you please do it somewhere else? But it's a
bit of a commitment.

Speaker 3 (23:21):
People can't read the whole thing, no, unless you stand.

Speaker 1 (23:24):
There for a few seconds with your arms out.

Speaker 4 (23:26):
Yeah, and that every time I wear it, that's the
interaction I have with everyone, and I'm like, Okay.

Speaker 3 (23:32):
This isn't worth it.

Speaker 1 (23:33):
Yeah, I'm yeah, you need to be the kind of
person that really wants to continually be the center of
the attention.

Speaker 3 (23:39):
I did not know.

Speaker 4 (23:41):
That's why people wear those shirts. They want attention. And
if you want that kind of attention, just join ICE
or something.

Speaker 3 (23:51):
I don't know.

Speaker 4 (23:52):
Yeah, you want people to stop and yell at you.

Speaker 3 (23:57):
There's things you can do other than wear an annoying.

Speaker 1 (24:00):
I hear that they aren't paying the ICE people that
they have overextended there. The whole ICE concept is like
they're way over budget. It's all crazy, and that now
there's no age maximum for ICE. So they got these
old people that mismanage their money and don't have pensions,
don't have money that are signing up there like seventy

(24:22):
that are like get out or'll break your window, like
angry old Fox News. Oh wow, watchers that are now
taken to the streets as ICE people.

Speaker 3 (24:32):
That is such and they're just doing it for the passion.

Speaker 1 (24:35):
They're just doing it for the hate. It seems like
it's crazy and they're all just like it's like there's
a of course, like an exercise minimum you have to
be able to run like a mile and a half
or something, or is like somebody made the video on
TikTok and it's just like that old man can't run
a mile and a half.

Speaker 3 (24:51):
I have a feeling these guys don't even go to
a building and even are briefed.

Speaker 1 (25:00):
It's the scariest part. There's a lot of those they're
like they think that they're vigilantes, where they're just they're
buying the equipment online and then going and doing shit
to people that they think they can do it too.
It's fucked up.

Speaker 4 (25:14):
Yeah, and then no one that's why they're wearing masks.
It's so funny that so many of these guys wearing
masks kidnapping people are the exact people that weren't gonna
wear a.

Speaker 3 (25:24):
Mask because of COVID.

Speaker 4 (25:25):
It's I find that ludicrous. I'm not you're not going
to take my freedom away. Unless I get to take
someone's freedom away, then all wear a mask.

Speaker 1 (25:33):
Yeah, I gotta be the one taking the freedom. Here's
how what's gonna go.

Speaker 4 (25:37):
Yeah, And I don't want anyone to see that I
never got those braces.

Speaker 3 (25:42):
And I wish I had.

Speaker 1 (25:43):
The mask part is so cowardly and lame or it's
just kind of like, I'm sorry, are you? Anyone is
supposed to think you're cool or scary or anything when
you literally can't do this with your full face.

Speaker 4 (25:58):
Like, what if it's one of those masks that has
like skeleton teeth on it, Well.

Speaker 1 (26:04):
That's private. Yeah, that's someone's personal decisions.

Speaker 4 (26:07):
Yeah, my mask has the Punisher logo.

Speaker 3 (26:12):
There's a lot of Uh.

Speaker 4 (26:14):
If you see a truck ever and the back has
the Punisher's skull, it's usually someone that has strong feelings
about guns and things like that. For some reason, that
comic book character. And I know nothing about Punisher.

Speaker 1 (26:29):
I think people just like that little skull with their teeth.
You know, it is a cool skull, the teeth of
the skull.

Speaker 3 (26:35):
I like their long teeth.

Speaker 1 (26:38):
It's like, what's up with that guy?

Speaker 3 (26:40):
Yeah, why the long face?

Speaker 4 (26:45):
But yeah there, I haven't seen him lately at Costco.
That was my only interaction with these masked human bandits.
So hopefully it's hopefully it's dying down and hopeful considered
a failure.

Speaker 1 (27:02):
It's definitely considered a failure. Also, the city of Chicago
and the state of Illinois just like smacked Donald Trump's
ass because he was like, We're going to Chicago next
and you know that guy Pritzker, that's the governor of Illinois.
He's kind of big, beefy guy, and he was just like,
I welcome you here. You're going to come to Chicago.

(27:24):
Come and basically was like, come at me. And then
they're like, oh, we're not going to Chicago.

Speaker 3 (27:29):
Oh really, uh huh.

Speaker 4 (27:31):
I remember they're being Chicago talks. It was next up
after Washington, d C. Gets cleaned up.

Speaker 1 (27:38):
Yep, And basically the mayor of Chicago and then the
governor of Illinois both made did press conferences where like, eh,
in what look at that?

Speaker 3 (27:50):
Wow?

Speaker 4 (27:51):
Even now, yeah, even now, there's a there's a little
Trump cut out on the side of a mini van.

Speaker 1 (27:58):
This and the like is played is yippie yippy. Then
there's an American flag just randomly on the back panel.
They're just visiting and this is this is how they
feel watching their friends and neighbors get stolen off the street.
That's just disgusting.

Speaker 3 (28:14):
Yeah, it's a weird. It's a weird time.

Speaker 4 (28:17):
Maybe they they don't know what's happening because they're not
watching the same news.

Speaker 1 (28:21):
Well that is that is it right there? Yeah, we've
been propagandized.

Speaker 4 (28:27):
Oh I was just in the middle of Pennsylvania. Even
the very confusingly the building I did my show in
because we went out of the camp to use a restaurant,
they had a Confederate flag on thee what on the
top of the building, And you can't be more north
than Pennsylvania. I'm like, what are you is it? Is

(28:50):
that the first ever compassionate use of that, like we
feel bad for the losing team.

Speaker 3 (28:56):
No, I just I couldn't figure it out.

Speaker 1 (28:58):
That's racist, It's all right.

Speaker 4 (29:00):
I mean, if you're flapping that in the north, you
can't even use the Southern heritage mumbo jumbo say as
one of their teeth falls out.

Speaker 3 (29:11):
It was.

Speaker 4 (29:13):
It was a bit of a surprise, but I did
my material and some of it was about that, and
the owner of the place was like, that was great.
So I don't think he knew that this flag was
on the top of the building. You know, there's other businesses. Yeah,
but you go to any small town something like that

(29:36):
fan there that was celebrating the guy, that's so normal.

Speaker 1 (29:41):
Yeah, to see well. And also it's kind of like,
I think those people are needing to show and CNB
seen because they are outnumbered, and that's what's becoming very
very clear. Is they are a vocal and hostile minority.
But most people are like this all terrible.

Speaker 3 (30:01):
Yes, it is. It is.

Speaker 4 (30:03):
Indeed, it's hard and it's hard to not see it.
Doing the traveling, you'll see it. When does your tour start.
You're going mostly week yep. But while commuting from these
airports to the cities, the outskirts, you will see. Yeah,
many a profile on a window, the Trump crooner with a.

Speaker 3 (30:27):
Cigar and hat.

Speaker 1 (30:30):
You have to be exactly across from it. What's the linery?
He says that you have to line up.

Speaker 3 (30:37):
Tim Robinson and such a fan.

Speaker 4 (30:39):
I still haven't skateboarded with him, but one day it'll
happen and I'll get nervous.

Speaker 3 (30:46):
Probably.

Speaker 4 (30:47):
I still really look up to people that I think
are funny.

Speaker 3 (30:53):
You have to you have to I like to get calloused.

Speaker 1 (30:57):
No, you have to always love your the art form. Yes,
is like looking over there. I've been really loving Mark
Maren's interviews that.

Speaker 3 (31:08):
He's been doing.

Speaker 1 (31:09):
I'm so yeah, yeah, it's great.

Speaker 4 (31:13):
I just watched something today where he was really handing
it to old You're too dirty for me to shake
your hands? Why am I forgetting his name? Used to
put a rubber glove on his head.

Speaker 1 (31:26):
Oh yeah, haw Mandel, Yes, yes, that that episode.

Speaker 4 (31:31):
Yeah, he said, and it was just spilling out of
his mouth.

Speaker 3 (31:36):
It wasn't rehard that if I were.

Speaker 4 (31:38):
To talk about something, and when you and I do,
there's often times where I'm like, I I'm afraid I
don't have the information to back up. When I just
started talking about it, I get anxious because you and
I we were not I'm in the comedy for the speech,
not the debate. And he just he said great things

(31:59):
on that podcast well.

Speaker 1 (32:01):
And I mean such important things where he's like, yeah,
you guys all got to do your jokes and now
you won, like trans people don't have rights, women don't.
Everything's been rolled back like you won, you got it?
What else do you want?

Speaker 3 (32:14):
Stop kick while they're down right?

Speaker 1 (32:17):
And it's and it's also like, and don't you dare
at this point somehow hedge and say that wasn't you
or that's not what you wanted. It's like, what the
fuck did you think was gonna happen when you make
a trans joke every time you get on stage.

Speaker 4 (32:30):
Yeah, And I think Howie Mandel was like, come on,
comedy doesn't have that much of an outreach, but it
really does.

Speaker 1 (32:37):
Of course it does. But also normally comics are like
you you can't, Like that's the argument when they're saying
you can't censor comics. It's the comp Comedians are the
most important voices that speak truth to power, So pick
a side. Yeah, it's like, so you're the most important
voices you speak truth to power. You misuse that voice.
You didn't do that. You were speaking truth to like

(32:59):
a one to two percent super minority that's already entirely oppressed,
and you made it so that they are now in
the crosshairs of these lunatics. Congratulations you did that.

Speaker 3 (33:12):
Yeah, yeah, it is.

Speaker 4 (33:14):
It's crazy that stand up hats that much or just
comedy on it's but yeah, usually it's comedians just riffing, yeah,
like you and I often.

Speaker 1 (33:26):
Do often and obviously, but I love that. I just
basically just stole Mark Maren's point, restated it, acted like
it was my point, and then got actually got myself
fired up about it. Or it's like all of that
was what Mark Maren said, not what I said.

Speaker 3 (33:43):
No I do, No, you're just restating. Yeah, we had
to explain why we're proud of the guy, yes.

Speaker 1 (33:49):
But also he's It made me think, you know, when
they tried to do Air America in like the late
nineties or early two thousands, I can't remember what it was, Yeah,
but there was a whole radio station, podcast station, I
can't remember.

Speaker 3 (34:01):
I think it was terrestrial radio.

Speaker 1 (34:04):
Yeah, and they Mark Marin was a host, Janni Groofflo
was a host. There was a bunch of people on it,
Sam Cedar, Sam Cedar was on there, a bunch of
great smart people, and it's like and it just didn't
it was too early. I think it was like those
guys were kind of visionaries, and it's like people weren't political, right,
it was too that was at the time still like

(34:25):
kind of nerdy and niche to talk about politics, which
is crazy.

Speaker 3 (34:29):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (34:30):
Yeah, it must have been a while back that i U.
Of course it was because it was Paton and Janine
promoting RADITUI and we did stand up and I opened
and a lot of Air America people were there with
tote bags to see Janine, and you could tell, you know,

(34:51):
they're like, wait, when's the political material come up? Because
she was just as any of us would do, was
doing stand up right and hadn't Shane the way that goes.

Speaker 3 (35:02):
You can have passions outside of what you write jokes about.

Speaker 4 (35:08):
Otherwise I'd be walking around doing potty topics all day.
I'm I'm veering away from the potty humor getting very adult.

Speaker 1 (35:20):
Yeah, you seem, especially during this conversation, even just in
the month i've seen you get you really matured.

Speaker 3 (35:26):
Yes, in the past since you last saw me.

Speaker 1 (35:29):
Yeah, I thought so. When you've gone to camp twice,
I think this really made a man out of you.

Speaker 2 (35:33):
Yeah, it really is.

Speaker 4 (35:35):
There was some missing puzzle pieces to my growth, and
I just filled some voids. Staying in a cabin yeah yeah,
all the camp like adults, twenty people in a cabin.
I don't know if I could have handled that. I
had a nice air conditioned hotel room. It was so

(35:55):
humid up there, Yeah, very humid, and that.

Speaker 3 (35:59):
Was It's kind of hard to deal with, but it
was very fun.

Speaker 4 (36:04):
I just pretended I was in the army, and then
they had a mess hall. We were given commissary. Oh,
that's a word.

Speaker 3 (36:11):
I don't know what it means.

Speaker 4 (36:12):
I think that means shaving kits and nah toothbrushes.

Speaker 1 (36:16):
I think commissary is the mess hall, if I'm not mistaken.

Speaker 4 (36:20):
Yes, they actually they had a canteen up there, and
that seems like a very prison y word. I'm gonna
go to the canteen. I'm gonna buy a toothbrush, and
you're gonna be.

Speaker 1 (36:31):
Sorry and I'll make you pay. What's that part about?
What's the revenge part of canteen about?

Speaker 4 (36:38):
Well, I think after you buy the toothbrush oftentimes. And
this was I just stand up at a club where
the one of the comics that went up first used
to be a prison guard.

Speaker 3 (36:51):
Oh, and he.

Speaker 4 (36:52):
Told a story that about a guy he's like, yeah,
just lightheartedly. Sometimes they'll put their own on a knife
that they made from a toothbrush and stab someone else
and make sure that there's an infection.

Speaker 3 (37:06):
And the whole audience was like, oh my god. Like
his stories were terrifying.

Speaker 4 (37:11):
But he worked in a prison and he was so
used to it that he was like, this is a
quirky story.

Speaker 1 (37:16):
Oh God.

Speaker 4 (37:18):
He had very scary stories and it made him kind
of scary.

Speaker 3 (37:22):
Yeah, bed yeah, yeah.

Speaker 4 (37:24):
And we had a little hotel room next to each
other and like.

Speaker 1 (37:28):
Oh oh, I thought you're a little argument or something.

Speaker 4 (37:31):
I'm like, no, no, uh yeah, like you leave those
prisoners alone, sir, damn it, you're too hard on them.
I write letters to many a long distance prisoner friend pen.

Speaker 3 (37:44):
Pal, and I've heard you're very rough on them.

Speaker 4 (37:50):
Now.

Speaker 3 (37:50):
That was the hotel. It was in like Marrow. I
don't know, one of.

Speaker 4 (37:54):
These beach towns, uh.

Speaker 3 (37:58):
Waitt Magoo, maybe my Goo and which I can't not
say and not laugh. You really love it point Magoo
is so funny. And the hotel there was like a
guy outside that.

Speaker 4 (38:19):
Lived in one of the rooms and he had health problems.
I'm not sure what was going on, but I couldn't
understand him very well. But we were chatting and then
he said, how's your bed? And I'm like, my bed,
it's pretty good. It's it's comfortable. He's like, that's my
old mattress. It's like, oh how long? How well, that's great.

(38:43):
I really had no follow up questions because I wanted it.
After that was out in the air, I was like,
that's totally normal. Well, what an honor to sleep where
you once slept.

Speaker 3 (38:56):
I feel nestled.

Speaker 4 (38:57):
By your past dand hairs hairs.

Speaker 3 (39:02):
So he said, that's my old mattress and I just.

Speaker 1 (39:05):
Said, hairs, hairs, hairs, We're here. Jeez.

Speaker 3 (39:13):
It was great.

Speaker 1 (39:14):
Jesus, Jesus.

Speaker 3 (39:15):
And I can't remember where they all just melt together, all.

Speaker 4 (39:20):
These gigs, but I know that the club was owned
by Bob Zaney.

Speaker 1 (39:25):
Oh was it Zany's.

Speaker 3 (39:28):
No, it was not. I don't think Zany's has anything
to do with Bob Zany surprise. I hope they work him.

Speaker 1 (39:35):
I mean they really should, but no, it.

Speaker 4 (39:37):
Was a club in some coastal town, Bob Zany's something
cracker Hut, chuckle bucket, and yeah, it was oddly when
I opened for Bob Zany as a young comic, he
had me do an illustration of his face for his website.

(40:02):
But as you clicked on it, you know, like click
on his hair, and it would say tour or whatever.

Speaker 3 (40:07):
It was like a that was popular.

Speaker 4 (40:10):
Yes, yeah, it was like a button but in the
center of his face if you clicked on it, it
was my website, which was not.

Speaker 3 (40:17):
But it gave me so much traffic.

Speaker 4 (40:19):
Oh that at the time I was doing storyboards or
trying to get and work as a storyboard artist, and
I I don't know how you gauge how often your
site is visited. But my placement for storyboard artists was
the first thing.

Speaker 1 (40:37):
Oh wow.

Speaker 4 (40:38):
But it was never like, Hey, I work for NBC,
do you want to storyboard this TV show?

Speaker 3 (40:44):
It was just like film students.

Speaker 4 (40:46):
But it got to the point where I'm like, I
can't be getting twenty five emails a day about Hi,
can you storyboard my short film for free?

Speaker 1 (40:54):
Wow?

Speaker 3 (40:55):
Oh no? Yeah. I did a few things.

Speaker 4 (41:00):
One thing was they had me put it through a
paper shredder after I was done drawing it, because it
was top secret instruction hand drawn panel like comic book
drawings of a remote missile launch system that you wore
as a backpack. And I showed the hands plugging into

(41:22):
these different cords on this remote like a box that
you wear on your back, and then missiles launching, and
I'm like, I don't know.

Speaker 3 (41:30):
And I talked to the old guy, was a nice.

Speaker 4 (41:32):
Guy in some southern state, and he's like, yeah, I
developed this piece of equipment. And I didn't even know
what I was drawing because it was just the hands.
And then at the end there's a guy like with
his arms like and then he's cheering, and then I
found out it was because he just launched a missile
and drew I had something to do with someone learning

(41:55):
how to, you know, decimate a village or something. Yeah,
so there's one on my hands, but in such a
roundabout way. Yeah, but I did say, like, you know,
I scanned these drawings to add the text and some
of the arrows like your hand goes on this, or
he's like it's okay, she wasn't.

Speaker 3 (42:14):
Actually he just needed to show them a video of
me shredding the drawings. But really.

Speaker 1 (42:23):
I could have you could have done anything you want.

Speaker 3 (42:25):
Yeah, this was my I could have been a real snow.

Speaker 1 (42:28):
Snowdon you are a real snowdon do you count?

Speaker 3 (42:32):
You're going the wrong way? You know, parking Lotbrary and
in so much trouble.

Speaker 1 (42:36):
I does realize that I have to eat some protein.
I was like, well, there's a McDonald's and then it's
we're like one thing over. So I just made it
I think impossible to go. I was like, oh, I know,
I do want French fries. So I was just trying
to get in. Wait can I get in from here?

Speaker 4 (42:55):
That's more of a alley, no big big wall.

Speaker 1 (43:02):
We'll just go on. Well, should we wrap it yeah,
we need to wrap it up.

Speaker 3 (43:06):
Oh yeah, let's do it, wrap it in. It's okay,
Well it's a quickie.

Speaker 4 (43:11):
I'm uh, well, in this next episode I like to
do uh.

Speaker 1 (43:15):
You know teachers.

Speaker 4 (43:16):
Yeah, we're gonna talk about your upcoming tour. Do you
mont or I don't know. I can just say right now,
I hope you have fun and don't and don't. I'm
just gonna go ahead and tease statements right before I
make them. Coming right up, I'm gonna ask Karen if
she's excited for a tour.

Speaker 3 (43:36):
And here we go, Karen, do you have an upcoming tour?
Are you excited?

Speaker 1 (43:40):
I am excited going to a bunch of cities.

Speaker 4 (43:42):
If you listen to my favorite murder goes a little long?
Oh why am I so nervous? We're going the wrong
way in all these parking lots. We're going through another
drive through the right way.

Speaker 3 (43:53):
We're going to wrap it up here, and uh, it
was good to see you again. It's so much more
continued catch.

Speaker 1 (44:00):
I know we're going to continue to catch up.

Speaker 3 (44:02):
You've been listening, So do you need a ride? D
y n A R Pulk Hulk.

Speaker 2 (44:14):
This has been an exactly right production.

Speaker 1 (44:17):
Our senior producer is Annalise Nelson.

Speaker 2 (44:20):
Mixed by Edson Choy.

Speaker 1 (44:22):
Our talent booker is Patrick Cootner.

Speaker 2 (44:24):
Theme song by Karen Kilgarreth.

Speaker 1 (44:26):
Artwork by Chris Fairbanks. Follow the show on Instagram, Twitter,
and Facebook at dinar podcast That's d y nar Podcast.

Speaker 4 (44:35):
For more information, go to exactly rightmedia dot com.

Speaker 1 (44:38):
Thank you, Oh, You're welcome.
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Hosts And Creators

Karen Kilgariff

Karen Kilgariff

Chris Fairbanks

Chris Fairbanks

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