November 28, 2025 • 53 mins
https://www.patreon.com/emergencyintercom
join the Patreon for bonus episodes, q&a/topic submissions, livestreams, pay for ky's lobotomy
Drew and ky are doing comedy sets soon. Enya got banned from a dating app and the road trip ends horribly lol
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Listen
Watch
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:16):
Make hi, guys, welcome to this episode of Emergency in
or Calm.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
You might be like, oh my god, where are they?
Means you're starting a business.
Speaker 3 (00:27):
We're starting a beautiful cafe business full of the.
Speaker 2 (00:30):
Beautiful cafe in Texas. I'm kidding. No, we're on the
way to Texas because Drew and.
Speaker 3 (00:35):
Guys, we have a surprise for y'all.
Speaker 4 (00:38):
Daddy came coming.
Speaker 3 (00:42):
Coming to Texas. He's going to see my hometown.
Speaker 2 (00:44):
Because in that book you read what is it?
Speaker 1 (00:46):
The is it the Seven Power Ship, The when you
read to manipulate people for the rest of your life.
Speaker 3 (00:50):
He tried to get that. He loves that.
Speaker 4 (00:52):
I don't love.
Speaker 2 (00:53):
He's really trying to get Drew to read that.
Speaker 4 (00:54):
I've never even read that book.
Speaker 1 (00:56):
He was like, you should read it because it worked
so well. But one of the steps is getting close
to someone's family right so that you can manipulate them
from the inside.
Speaker 4 (01:03):
I'm just finding that out now because I've never read it,
and I don't even know what that book is.
Speaker 2 (01:08):
Have you actually never read that? You've read that?
Speaker 4 (01:10):
No, I haven't. I actually did start it.
Speaker 1 (01:12):
I read the back of it before, and now you
like mention it in conversation.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
Actually know you've always mentioned it in conversation.
Speaker 3 (01:19):
Is like, if you read that, you're a scary motherfucker. Yeah,
that's that.
Speaker 2 (01:24):
Maybe that's why I think you read it.
Speaker 4 (01:26):
I started it, but then I got bored, and then
I read something that was more like feminine.
Speaker 3 (01:32):
My year of rest and relaxation and the body keeps
the score.
Speaker 4 (01:34):
Body keeps the score. Cracked the bell jar, and then
you cracked it. I cracked it. Oh you're talking about
cracking the bell jar.
Speaker 2 (01:48):
Oh no, you were talking about cracking the bell jar,
which is like a really odd thing.
Speaker 3 (01:51):
This, do your job better? What we need? Less cuts?
Speaker 4 (01:55):
Less cuts?
Speaker 1 (01:56):
Okay, Well, before we left on our road trip, me
and Josh literally reached flow state with each other in
terms of bullying. Kai Like, he got over and was
checking through his bag before he left to make sure
we have everything for the podcast, and he pulled out
this weird ass thing of batteries and Josh just over
his shoulder, was like, you have all those fucking batteries?
Speaker 2 (02:15):
Like, or what do you say to you?
Speaker 4 (02:16):
I have a case that also acts as a charger
for my batteries. And he was like, why do you
have a case for your batteries and then and you
destroyed me too. I forget what she said because I
blacked out from fear.
Speaker 3 (02:26):
But the thing is is it wasn't even bullying. Kai
is just so used to y'all bullying him say I'm
sticking up for you, that any comments towards him just
become immediately bullying.
Speaker 1 (02:37):
Yeah, so what you're saying is it's kind of how
you take it. And since you decide to take it
like that, you decided to take it from the back.
Speaker 2 (02:43):
No one told you to take it from the back.
Speaker 1 (02:45):
When you take your your comments from other people from
the back, I do.
Speaker 4 (02:49):
I prefer it that way.
Speaker 3 (02:50):
Well, guys, Andya is pregnant after being celibate for four months,
five months, six months. Somehow she's like mother Mary. She
has a baby growing inside of her.
Speaker 5 (02:58):
It's crazy.
Speaker 1 (02:59):
I know, I think they're three. I'm like starting to like,
I think it's triplets. I think I might get up
to quadruplets. Oh my god, imagine me with the longest stomachant.
Speaker 3 (03:09):
One of my favorite tweets I ever made when I
was still on Twitter was like this woman had like
the world's largest belly, Like it was like literally like
eight feet long and she had like octuplets in it,
and like I put that picture and then the next
picture was like a video of me like crawling around
in my sheets with a red light on, like I
was like inside, like hitting the walls. Let me help,
(03:30):
please let this belly like a grown ass man being
inside of a pregnant woman's belly. That's like a king.
Speaker 1 (03:37):
That's yeah, I was gonna say, because we've stumbled on
that before, We've stumbled on those videos, and.
Speaker 3 (03:41):
We've talked about it extensively.
Speaker 2 (03:43):
We really love.
Speaker 4 (03:45):
War for consume another.
Speaker 3 (03:48):
Yeah, when you eat people.
Speaker 1 (03:50):
Well Drew saying that because all my periods are getting
like literally worse and worse, and now when I start
my period, the first two days, I'm genuinely having to
remind myself there's no way I'm passing a miscarriage.
Speaker 2 (04:02):
I'm like, there's no way, Like it's so much blood.
It literally feels like the shining, Like I don't know
what's happening.
Speaker 1 (04:10):
The older I get, I guess I'm just becoming more
of a woman because my period is really fucking psycho.
The past two days, I've wanted to actually like stab
everyone in the house and then kill myself.
Speaker 3 (04:21):
Oh my god, not actually, but you know, oh.
Speaker 4 (04:24):
Fuck, I forgot the thing that you're supposed to microwave.
I got you this thing to put on.
Speaker 5 (04:29):
Your Is this the surprise?
Speaker 4 (04:31):
No? No, I I've been talking.
Speaker 3 (04:33):
About a surprise for three months now.
Speaker 1 (04:35):
He's doing the thing men do when like they don't
have to act on the thing you crave.
Speaker 2 (04:42):
If they keep saying they're gonna.
Speaker 4 (04:43):
Do, you guys are gonna look so stupid when I do. Surprise.
Speaker 3 (04:45):
Oh I got I actually am it's gonna be cool.
Speaker 4 (04:48):
But that's on the surprise. I just heard that your
periods were bad, so I bought you some like a
thing to put on your stomach to help with the pain.
Speaker 3 (04:54):
But I rub her But I did not buy that.
Speaker 4 (04:57):
No, I didn't.
Speaker 2 (04:58):
Yeah, like, what the fuck are you talking?
Speaker 3 (04:59):
I rub her about in her back. Yeah, every night
for her because she sleeps next to me in bed.
We were in bed last night at ten pm, Like,
we fell asleep at ten pm and woke up at
six am to get her ass.
Speaker 2 (05:13):
We were I was dead asleep by ten thirty.
Speaker 3 (05:16):
Yeah. It was like it was a beautiful thing, and
I was like, oh, this is something I should talk about.
I think I am slowly but surely getting addicted to
melotonin because I had it like two nights in a row,
and I wasn't told that the pills I was taking
was twelve milligrams of melatonin.
Speaker 1 (05:37):
Oh wait, so the first two times you took it
was twelve milligrams.
Speaker 3 (05:40):
No, I bit them in half. So I was taking
six milligrams, which is still far too much melatonin to
put your body. But the way I felt on six
milligrams of melatonin kind of rewired my brain in a
way that I wasn't prepared for. And now I just
like think about getting high all the time, and like,
so I'm taking six milligramston in before bed every single night,
(06:02):
and when I want to stop, Oh, I found out.
I found out that I bought a bottle of three
hundred count melatonin. So it's twelve milligrams each three hundred pills.
If I bite them in thirds every single night, I
have nine hundred doses of melatonin. So three years of
melatonin for seventeen dollars. Who's doing it like me? Who's
(06:22):
frugal like me?
Speaker 2 (06:25):
Dude? Honestly, no one. It's kind of drawing.
Speaker 1 (06:27):
Sometimes, Like my dude, he did that math on the way,
like on the drive. He just said that out loud
and we were like, why did you say that?
Speaker 2 (06:38):
And it's because at what time was that, like eight am?
Speaker 1 (06:41):
He was already thinking about the melatonin he's going to
take tonight. So I lovedy who is fully already like
he's like telling us this because we're very similar in
the sense that I started mentioning weed once I was
already mad addicted, Like once I was like completely like
bound by it.
Speaker 2 (06:57):
That's when I was like I was high. I was high.
Speaker 1 (06:58):
I was high, and you are prepping You're what's it called?
What does mister beasts do with war crimes?
Speaker 3 (07:05):
Oh? Predictive programming?
Speaker 2 (07:07):
Yeah, you're predictive programming your mind.
Speaker 3 (07:09):
It feels so it feels so good, Like I'm not
even kidding, Like I literally, like for five minutes before
I fall asleep, my body is buzzing. It's not like
a warm, fuzzy, euphoric feeling. It's just like almost like
a vibration to my body.
Speaker 2 (07:24):
Do you get really anxious before you go to sleep?
Speaker 1 (07:27):
Yeah, So that probably is just alleviating in general, because
you rarely go to bed with whimsy in your heart.
Speaker 3 (07:34):
It's it's it's really crazy.
Speaker 4 (07:36):
I'm addicted to wrapping my hands around like a warm
cup of coffee and curling.
Speaker 3 (07:42):
It is fall, it's almost winter, but no melatonin is
fucking lit. I'm feeling great, like I'm sleeping better. But
it is crazy how I have been just like suffering
like anxiety attacks every single night for the last like
nine months of my life. Like literally I've just been like,
(08:02):
like you know how there's like high functioning alcoholics or
high functioning drug addicts. I'm literally a high functioning like
anxiety sufferer, Like I am in a constant state of
fear and panic. But I do a good job at
like masking it.
Speaker 2 (08:14):
Well.
Speaker 1 (08:14):
I think that's why I've become so addicted to weed,
because I actually couldn't give a fuck. The mix of
weed in my prozac has definitely jailed me in some ways,
but freed me in so many other ways.
Speaker 2 (08:27):
Like it doesn't even matter, like I don't care because
I just I couldn't. Actually sometimes it's a bit worrying.
It's a little worried, yeah, because I really couldn't give
a fuck.
Speaker 1 (08:35):
The fact that I hit my head as hard as
I did, like two weeks ago, and I didn't go
to the hospital.
Speaker 2 (08:39):
That has been something I've thought about. Also, Josie said
he had a dream.
Speaker 1 (08:44):
Fuck I wish, I wish we could call him.
Speaker 2 (08:47):
But he said he had a dream that I hit
my head again. You have a dream that that dream
dream y'all.
Speaker 3 (08:54):
Know that one video, that one meme.
Speaker 2 (08:56):
I don't So you really are scared.
Speaker 4 (08:59):
I know.
Speaker 6 (09:02):
Have you ever had a dreams that that you you
had you you you could you do? You want you
you could do so you you do you could you want?
You want him to do?
Speaker 3 (09:17):
You so much?
Speaker 6 (09:18):
You could do anything?
Speaker 1 (09:21):
Oh, he had a dream that I hit my head
again and that I was like whatever, and I didn't
go to the hospital. And then the next day I
guess I like shaved the back of my head because
it felt weird. And he said that I have like
I had like the substance type of just like mutated
infected like pussy back of my head and that I
(09:41):
was really like just like oh.
Speaker 2 (09:43):
Whatever, it's yeah, it's bad.
Speaker 1 (09:46):
I know, Like I was like that, and the dream
like I was just like so like it was like embarrassing,
Like I was really embarrassed of my pussy head, my
pussy head.
Speaker 3 (09:56):
Not making you laugh, was like, well, this is awesome,
an exciting development in my entire life, Like one of
the most my entire life, one of the most exciting
developments in my life as a grown ass man. But
I finally got sent nudes to my business email, and
like it was really impressive, Like it was.
Speaker 2 (10:19):
You're saying that, and the person is going to think
you want.
Speaker 3 (10:22):
More and no, no, no, well because I'm going to
read them to filth because I know the tricks, buddy,
I know the tricks. Like it's all perspective, Like it's
all perspective, like he's playing perspective games with his wiener
to make it look girthier and longer than.
Speaker 4 (10:36):
It actually a wide angle.
Speaker 3 (10:37):
Yeah yeah, yeah, you like tilted up a little bit.
Speaker 4 (10:40):
I don't. I only know that because I do stuff
with video and I know how how perspectives work.
Speaker 3 (10:45):
I've read.
Speaker 4 (10:46):
Yeah, you know, it's actually crazy. I've never taken a picture,
even for me to look at you.
Speaker 2 (10:52):
I've never taken a picture ever. Well oh wait, that
makes no sense. You're so old. Have you avoided a.
Speaker 4 (10:57):
Camera that No, I'm talking about a naughty picture. I've
never taken one of those of my like, oh, yeah,
sorry that the headphones went not I just have never
done it. Sorry, but you guys can go back to talking.
Speaker 3 (11:16):
Guy, that was so scary.
Speaker 4 (11:18):
Fly flew into my ear and then it pulled out
the headphones.
Speaker 3 (11:23):
There are a lot of flies in this fucking restaurant.
Speaker 2 (11:28):
That they're gonna spin.
Speaker 1 (11:35):
But yeah, no, I can't say the same, And I
don't even want to talk about it because.
Speaker 2 (11:41):
I'm so scared.
Speaker 3 (11:42):
No, I've taken so many nudes it's like really crazy.
Speaker 1 (11:45):
I think I just don't it's different for gay guys
to that big of a deal.
Speaker 2 (11:51):
Yeah, I think both of us live in the same
world where I'm like, I don't think it's that deep.
Speaker 3 (11:54):
It's it's really it's really not that deep now, Like
I do find like sexting a little fun.
Speaker 1 (12:00):
Me Like, yeah, i think I'm a bit past the
point of sexting other than like, if sexting lasts more
than like seven seconds, more than like a seven text
back and forth, what the fuck are we doing it?
Speaker 3 (12:14):
Actually, go drive over fly here.
Speaker 1 (12:19):
Like also, most of you aren't really good with words.
We're going through like a literacy epidemic. Sexting is definitely
on the decline because half of you also can't describe
what you would even do if you were with someone
because a lot you.
Speaker 3 (12:33):
Get there and you sit on the edge of the
bed all like anxiously. It's like I thought you were
a freak. I thought you were a freaking No, but
that's who I am. I'm like, I can get like
real fucking freaky and creepy over text. Well not creepy,
but I can get real freaky. But it is it
is like a flow state that you enter, Like I like,
right now, I'm trying to think, like what I would
(12:54):
say if I was in a situation like that, and
like nothing comes to mind. But when I'm in that
flow state and I'm bouncing off that person, like kind
of becomes like a little fun game, a little little thing.
Speaker 2 (13:05):
And you're talking about sex.
Speaker 3 (13:07):
Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah.
Speaker 1 (13:12):
I kind of think it's a lost art form because
I guess sex to get away is like for play,
but again with literacy down, Oh my god, I wonder
how many people have used cha GBT to sex.
Speaker 3 (13:22):
Wait, what the fuck is going on with my phone?
Like I truly don't understand how to use this shit anymore.
Like the fucking camera roll is a piece of dog shit.
Wait where Like, literally, how do I get to my photos?
Speaker 2 (13:35):
This reminds me of my teacher I had a relationship with.
Speaker 1 (13:41):
How he used to always say that Apple was too
complicated and that he liked Samsung because it was simple.
Speaker 2 (13:46):
And now watching you use this, I'm like, yeah.
Speaker 3 (13:48):
I guess I I I too had an inappropriate relationship
with the teacher that I haven't really talked about because
I don't know if it was weird, but he did
name one of his twins after me, Like twelve years
later he named his child Drew.
Speaker 2 (14:04):
I mean it's also a really common name.
Speaker 3 (14:06):
But no, like the relationship we had was kind of
it was kind of weird, like nothing actually happened, but
like he would like come to my house and he
would make me do the do it like Bernie dance
and I used to be like, oh, he thinks the
dance is funny, But I really think he liked seeing
my Wiener bulge.
Speaker 2 (14:25):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (14:25):
I definite had inappropriate relations with a teacher. Not anything crazy,
but there were definitely teachers who were way I was
way too close to. And when I say teachers, I
mean one teacher who like one time he was like,
I would marry you if you were an adult.
Speaker 2 (14:38):
And I was like, oh my god, thank you so much.
I would marry you too.
Speaker 4 (14:41):
Did you see that Trump lost his voice shouting about
trade Actually yeah, people reporters were like, why is your
voice rasped me, and he said, because he was shouting
about trade policy.
Speaker 3 (14:53):
And then did you see Trump fall in love with Mandani?
Speaker 4 (14:57):
Yes? It was.
Speaker 3 (14:58):
It was a beautiful thing and I'm not gonna lie
it for half a second. Broke my reality, and I
was like, oh, Trump's just like a sweet little old man,
like he like has a little crush on this guy
because famously he sucks stick and balls.
Speaker 1 (15:11):
Yeah, but he was swooing. I know, his fucking little
boxer briefs were moistish pitched, like his butthole was fucking quaking.
You know when you have to ship so bad your
cheeks starts sweating. He was having that from needing something
in his ass so bad.
Speaker 3 (15:29):
I need him, but I need to clarify immediately, I
came back to reality and hated the man. Yeah, I
hate the Orange Man. Anybody else here else, anybody else here?
Speaker 1 (15:43):
Okay, don't be too loud because we are in Texas,
so like, actually, Joe, you're like screaming, like literally, bit,
we're gonna get fucking followed home. Me Andrew have the
privilege of just being like a very gorgeous white couple
off of like face value, you know that that that.
Speaker 2 (16:01):
Gives us the privilege to drive across. And then I
feel like a cockway.
Speaker 1 (16:05):
I give like ambiguous mm hmm, and what yeah, until
you speak.
Speaker 3 (16:14):
But like until I speak, I physically like ambiguous.
Speaker 2 (16:18):
I think no.
Speaker 1 (16:18):
I think even when you speak, people think you're straight,
at least when we're together, because like I think older
people just look at us and you they're like, oh,
you know those new waves. They're like, oh, the guy's gay,
but he's not. And the girls also gay because.
Speaker 4 (16:34):
She works so many of my friends from like college
in high school. I just think that I do a
podcast with a couple, like a straight couple. They've seen
clips and they just think that you're straight. And then
I asked my friend. He he was like, well, he's gay,
and he said, I just assume he joked about being
gay all the time.
Speaker 3 (16:52):
No. Also, okay, I like literally couldn't take his eyes
off of me today.
Speaker 2 (16:56):
Oh my god, are you getting the butterflies over drew.
Speaker 4 (16:59):
I got butterflies.
Speaker 3 (17:00):
I mean, I hope I look the same as I
did earlier, but like, oh my god, I looked so
good earlier, and I think.
Speaker 2 (17:07):
Today is kind of one of my busted days.
Speaker 1 (17:08):
I started my period, so I'm in that weird like
in between where.
Speaker 2 (17:12):
I used to do my hair.
Speaker 3 (17:14):
I refuse to drive well.
Speaker 2 (17:16):
I also refused to sit passenger seat.
Speaker 4 (17:20):
It said.
Speaker 2 (17:24):
I hit a fan with my car. I got into
a minor event.
Speaker 1 (17:29):
I didn't tell you, but leaving the Okay, So me
and Oriyan went you did, so we're to God, but
I have no way of connecting. Okay, So me and
Orian go to this Hamnet screening.
Speaker 2 (17:40):
That movie is lit.
Speaker 3 (17:42):
I can't believe you have kept this.
Speaker 1 (17:44):
Because I almost literally immediately texted you and called you.
But I was like, I'm gonna save it because it's
so fucking funny. But me and Orian were leaving the screening,
it's like nine pm or some shit, and I'm driving
behind this car there in front of me. It's a stoplight,
but it's one of those things that's like there's a
right turning lane, a left turning lane, and then a
(18:05):
front turning lane. And I was I had just grabbed
my purse because I was looking for my fucking.
Speaker 2 (18:10):
Vape and I was like digging in there.
Speaker 1 (18:13):
And then I like from the corner of my eye
saw like the green light, so like I didn't accelerate.
I just lifted my foot and like as I was, yeah,
my car was like idling, and I just.
Speaker 3 (18:25):
Like and like, how do you know it was a fan?
Speaker 2 (18:29):
Bruh, let me finish the fucking story.
Speaker 1 (18:31):
Actually, if a fan like saying that is actually a
stretch because she didn't say all that, let's be clear.
Speaker 3 (18:39):
But we got on and I was like Mama talking
about water.
Speaker 2 (18:43):
Because literally I was so embarrassed because my purse.
Speaker 1 (18:45):
Was like on my lap and I'm like I had
pulled all my stuff out, so like all over my
car now is like makeup, lipliners, edibles, weed, like dead vapes,
empty jewel packs.
Speaker 2 (18:56):
And I was like, oh my god, I literally gone out.
Speaker 1 (18:59):
I was like, oh my god that we pulled over
and I got out and her car was completely untouched.
Like her car was completely fine. Also when I hit
that car, me and O Ryan both at the exact
same time.
Speaker 3 (19:10):
Oh, it was like, oh my god, Ryan is the
common denominator. Bitch, she crashed with me in the fucking car,
almost took my goddamn line. Yeah, almost killed me. And
now you she almost killed.
Speaker 2 (19:24):
Because she was distracting me.
Speaker 1 (19:26):
Because if you were a good friend, why why wouldn't
you get my vape out of my purse for me?
Speaker 2 (19:30):
And I know that you should.
Speaker 3 (19:32):
She should read your mind exactly.
Speaker 2 (19:33):
She should have been like Enya hasn't hit her vape
in the past two minutes?
Speaker 1 (19:37):
Been in the car? Yeah, I do, and you just
put it up to my mouth. They put a lot
of stuff up to my mouth.
Speaker 3 (19:43):
Just what you know, I need it exactly finish.
Speaker 1 (19:46):
But we got out of the car, we pulled over,
and I'm like standing outside and.
Speaker 2 (19:50):
I like literally didn't know what to do because I.
Speaker 1 (19:52):
Also haven't gotten into any like actually, this is the
second time.
Speaker 3 (19:56):
You've been in like four rags.
Speaker 2 (19:58):
No, okay, like.
Speaker 1 (20:01):
Rex, I'm not getting into car wrecks, babes, don't even
I'm not don't say I'm not even getting car bombs?
Speaker 3 (20:08):
Bomb? Wait, should I ask the waiter for bombs in.
Speaker 2 (20:14):
Waco, Texas?
Speaker 4 (20:16):
Bom Hey? Does anybody hear any here? Teacon?
Speaker 3 (20:20):
I didn't get a bomb. I didn't get to get out.
Speaker 1 (20:25):
We get out and I'm just like looking and there's
nothing on the car, and I'm not getting I thought
about just driving away, like and I was like, well,
there's nothing on the car. I don't know who's in
the car, and like I was just freaking out. And
then I'm like standing there and I literally out loud,
I was like, well, are you gonna get out?
Speaker 2 (20:41):
Like I think I said something like that. Well, like
I said it out loud, I didn't. We were on
a main street to the side on like I think it.
Speaker 1 (20:50):
Was down Wiltshire or some ship like that or like Olympic.
So I was like, I was too scared to get
in the road because I have heard of too many
horror stories of people getting into car accidents and then
pulling over at the side and then getting hit by
a car while they're trying to like manage the car accident.
So I didn't want to get in the street, and
I didn't really know what to do. So I was
just standing in the back of her car, and I
(21:12):
was too scared to go up to the window.
Speaker 2 (21:13):
So I guess I kind of us to her.
Speaker 7 (21:15):
I was like, are you gonna should I come like
I literally was just like so on and she got
out and I'm like, yeah, there's like I don't see anything,
but like if you want, like I can give you
my number.
Speaker 1 (21:26):
And I was kind of leading the conversation, but it
really was like just four pretty girls standing in the street.
Speaker 3 (21:31):
Like it was a very like a man there, like me,
like a big strong man to kind of facilitate and
like just make sure.
Speaker 2 (21:40):
Everybody is an extra gig eye to crash into.
Speaker 3 (21:43):
The to crash up the bumper.
Speaker 2 (21:47):
But yeah, there was like no like sign of anything.
Speaker 1 (21:49):
But I gave her my number because I was like, oh,
if you, like if in the daytime you see something
and you want to like hit me up. And then
her friend we were all standing there, and then her
friend just like turned to O'Ryan and was like, I
know who you guys are, by the way, this is
so funny, and then like the like manger. I don't
remember what she said. And I also don't remember their
names because I was literally in a state a full
panic because.
Speaker 3 (22:09):
You probably shouldn't share their names either.
Speaker 1 (22:11):
Yeah, true, true, true, But she has my fucking phone number.
Speaker 2 (22:15):
But I was just laughing and I was like I'm
so sorry.
Speaker 1 (22:17):
I was literally digging in my bag for my vape.
Speaker 2 (22:20):
But I just we were cracking up.
Speaker 1 (22:22):
And then we drove off and me and Ern were
literally just dying laughing from us, both screaming, and she
just kept being like, I had a premonition. I literally
knew this was going to happen. I knew I was
gonna get yeah, or I was like, I knew something
was gonna happen today.
Speaker 2 (22:35):
I just knew it. I just knew it. So thankfully
that was the car scent. But yeah, I hit a
fans car. Wow, And that was my story. It's not
that crazy.
Speaker 3 (22:42):
But when you were digging for a vape, yeah, oh
my god, I got the vape. Though I got it.
Did you hit it in front of them?
Speaker 2 (22:50):
Yeah? It was in my hand. Oh wow, I was
literally standing outside it was.
Speaker 1 (22:53):
But it was one of these like when it's like
really bold in your fist.
Speaker 3 (22:57):
Oh yeah, like you.
Speaker 2 (22:58):
Can't even hide that you're hitting it.
Speaker 3 (23:00):
Because because also everybody knows that trick by now, I know. Well,
speaking of vapes, they found fecal matter inside vapes, So
we are literally smoking on ship turns every every time
we hit it. Yeah, we're literally smoking on dookie pack
like parts and crap and ship like. That's good though,
(23:21):
but I think that's why it tastes so good.
Speaker 2 (23:23):
Yeah, that's I was gonna say.
Speaker 4 (23:26):
Don't think poop tastes bad.
Speaker 1 (23:29):
That's not really what we were saying. You know, we
were saying like fecal like particles. You're saying poop doesn't
taste bad.
Speaker 3 (23:38):
Full ship, you eat turds.
Speaker 4 (23:40):
Well, I thought you guys were talking about something else.
I'm sorry.
Speaker 3 (23:44):
I think we should just move on because this is
really revealing. No, I eat shit.
Speaker 4 (23:51):
Too, eat ship all the time, a big fat, stinky ship.
Speaker 1 (23:59):
Well, I've decided getting close to your father as an
adult is the equivalent to trip sitting somebody doing shrooms.
Speaker 2 (24:08):
That's what it feels like. But I don't know if
you would agree.
Speaker 3 (24:12):
Getting close to your father's trip sitting someone for shrooms or.
Speaker 1 (24:15):
Not trip sitting, but like hanging out with somebody after
they do shrooms.
Speaker 2 (24:19):
Like every time I see my dad, each time we have.
Speaker 3 (24:22):
A conversation, especial as they get older.
Speaker 1 (24:24):
Yeah, like they're slowly microudosing into like a different reality.
Speaker 3 (24:28):
Yeah yeah, yeah, I mean it's like that thing where
it's like, oh, a straight man only gains empathy in
general after doing mushrooms. It's like literally like the same idea.
It's like my father like aging has made him so
empathetic and he's like a sweet man now. But it
makes me like so happy but also sad because like
the day my parents die, bitch, I'm fucking killing myself.
(24:50):
My parents died just randomly. I would hang myself, No,
it does. I wouldn't hang myself. I would like run
away and like dive into icy cold waters or something.
Speaker 1 (25:00):
You can't even get in a river on a hot day, yeah,
but like diving into icy cold I.
Speaker 3 (25:06):
Want to get like Titanic and drama. Like I feel like.
Speaker 2 (25:09):
You're gonna eat your three year supply of meloton.
Speaker 3 (25:12):
He's gonna eat. I mean they taste good as fun too,
that's the crazy taste good. It tastes good. There's dissol dissolve.
And last night I was looking up because it hit
literally within like five minutes, so like if you look
at my like, I know.
Speaker 1 (25:26):
Because I was falling asleep laughing to flap Jack and then.
Speaker 2 (25:31):
Like I was in bed like dead asleep. I was
like like and he just goes through and I just
heard no.
Speaker 3 (25:40):
Idea you're watching still, and I was like, I'm.
Speaker 1 (25:43):
Sorry, to be fair, I was half asleep, and I've
been doing that a lot, like I keep because I've
been sleeping so early, Like I go in and out
of like waves of sleep as I'm falling asleep because
my body is like, no, it's too early to go
to sleep.
Speaker 3 (25:56):
Check the camera. Yeah, but sorry to keep going in you.
Speaker 2 (26:05):
All day. I've wanted to trip Kih so badly.
Speaker 3 (26:08):
I know you just are so mean to him, But
it's like it's like a way of flirting, I think,
because someone in my life right now is so diabolically
rude to me, like literally just like will randomly just
call me ugly and I can't tell if he's being
serious or not. But I truly, truly, truly like got
to the bottom of it, and I think he wants
to have sex with me and he knows I won't.
(26:29):
I would literally never.
Speaker 2 (26:31):
Oh see.
Speaker 1 (26:31):
But I'm not that kind of bully, Like I'm not
commenting on people's looks in a negative way in terms
of like I don't call you ugly, do I?
Speaker 3 (26:39):
I just like, also, I just need to make it clear.
I threw some of this leaf on the ground. Probably
shouldn't have done that. I don't pick it up. I
just feel bad.
Speaker 4 (26:54):
And he said she wanted to rip out my eyelashes.
Speaker 3 (26:57):
Also, not you and NYA texting every single night before bad.
Speaker 4 (27:02):
I don't think it's been every night, No, six out
of the seven nights of the week.
Speaker 3 (27:07):
Probably six seven.
Speaker 4 (27:09):
But I'm so drunk, I don't even remember when I
saw it. I at this point, I'm getting hammered every
night basically, so I don't know what I'm saying. So
if it's incoherent, that's probably why. And I start early.
I start right when I wake two pm. You wake
up at two pm. No, I'm waking up at around
seven am.
Speaker 1 (27:28):
Because that's why you haven't been able to drive on
the whole trip, because you're just like drunk all the time.
Speaker 4 (27:31):
Yes, And I don't want you guys to judge me.
Speaker 2 (27:35):
Yeah, well we are judging you. Yeah that's really odd.
That's like fucked up, it's weird.
Speaker 4 (27:39):
All right. Well, it's my medicine, so I don't know.
Speaker 3 (27:41):
He literally can't live without it. I mean, yeah, I'm
not judging you. I'm judging you what you're drinking. I
literally started shaking if I don't eat box. It's crazy
and I need to fix and I need to fix
right now.
Speaker 4 (28:01):
Oh my god, I can't stop cold turkey.
Speaker 3 (28:03):
You have to wean off.
Speaker 4 (28:04):
You have to wean off.
Speaker 2 (28:06):
Yeah, I think, Drew. Can you start watching YouTube videos
of how to give heads? Like since we're already because
we're gonna just have to get married.
Speaker 3 (28:14):
Yeah, I know, and at.
Speaker 2 (28:15):
One point you will have to start sexually pleasing me.
Speaker 3 (28:17):
But if we marry, I get to pick where we live.
Speaker 2 (28:21):
Says, who the fuck? When? Why? And how?
Speaker 3 (28:24):
Mean it's marrying you, then we're moving to the Silver
Lake Reservoir.
Speaker 1 (28:32):
That's not marriage. That's fucking torture. That's literally fucking torture.
Speaker 3 (28:36):
No where would where would we live?
Speaker 1 (28:39):
I want to live like upstate or in the woods
upstate New York.
Speaker 3 (28:43):
No, app you would want to live upstate California?
Speaker 2 (28:48):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (28:49):
What about upstate Texas? And we live in like the desert?
Speaker 2 (28:54):
You want me to kill myself?
Speaker 3 (28:55):
Yes, yeah, you're trying to be free.
Speaker 2 (28:58):
Yeah, you're trying to isolate me.
Speaker 3 (29:00):
The dust Bowl was real, Like I have theories that
it wasn't real or it wasn't as big as it was. Jell,
learn about the dust bol Yeah it was. It was
legitimately like a huge like section of history class, Like
we learned about the dust bowl for like months. Yeah,
it happened all over like the Midwest. It was like
(29:21):
the crops like sucked up all the nutrients from the
soil and like made it super loose and like wind
would fucking blow and like it just would make giant
plumes of dust. But like the way they were saying
it happened like legitimately made it sound like it was
like apocalyptic and like millions and millions and millions of
people died and were like affected in shit. But I'm like, girl,
(29:45):
like it's not that deep. I have dust in my house.
Speaker 2 (29:50):
Dust actually might be that much.
Speaker 4 (29:52):
No, it was.
Speaker 3 (29:52):
It was like bad dust. It was like dust with glass.
Speaker 1 (29:55):
And it also not only that, like inhaling dust me
with a vape in my hand, and I smoked so
much every day, Like I'm inhaling so much stuff.
Speaker 2 (30:02):
Also, that is the other thing is like we.
Speaker 1 (30:04):
We don't live in a good place.
Speaker 3 (30:07):
In terms of the modern day version of that is
the break dust and a babe, the break dust. Yeah,
all of these fucking cars, like the breaks when they
get worn down and it just makes like microscopic flakes
of dust. And that's like.
Speaker 1 (30:22):
I've been all over I've been coming to this like
theory and it really isn't me trying to be anti
like doctors and science, because I do. I am pro
health and all these things. But when I hear your shit.
Speaker 5 (30:35):
Pro living, pro sliving, Yeah, what is that?
Speaker 4 (30:41):
Haltan said, She's trying to make the words living happen,
and Drew's friend said something was like pro sliving or
pro s life.
Speaker 3 (30:50):
Pro s life. He's pro living, pro s living, but
what was gonna say? I forgot, I'm not buying the
dust bawl oh, I I.
Speaker 1 (31:02):
Just you talking about that makes me think about how
like street cats and like street dogs live for so long.
Speaker 2 (31:08):
And I sometimes have that theory with my own mind
and body. I'm like, like, if you.
Speaker 1 (31:13):
Give yourself too good of care, then your body will
expect it. Like in my head, cats who were overly
like feed like to me, like and God forbid, because
of something actually happened, I would die like I overcare
for a zool.
Speaker 2 (31:27):
And sometimes I'm like, oh my God, in a weird way,
this is gonna.
Speaker 3 (31:30):
Be like cal almost escaped. I know my soul almost
escaped escaped a couple of days ago. So, like Josh
was like cleaning his room and he had like a
giant bag of garbage and he put like half full
cups of coffee in the trash bag. And like, I
can't blame him for that because I do the same
shit sometimes with like sotop, but I or he was
(31:55):
like carrying the bag of garbage out and he was
going on our back door and he noticed that the
coffee was leaking all over the floor, so he like
ran out the door and ran to the trash bag
or trash cans and left the door open. And we
have a very strict rule in our house because we
have trauma from Azula escaping twice, that all doors must
be shut behind you. And we are so neurotic about it.
Speaker 1 (32:14):
Yeah it's bad, like I'll be falling asleep and even it's.
Speaker 2 (32:19):
Myself a door is open or like a windows.
Speaker 3 (32:21):
You literally did do that, yeah, I did. Like you
literally were like the doors open, and I was like, no,
it's not I just walked by it. You're okay, But uh,
Josh left the door open and a Zul like wandered
into the backyard and was just like standing out there
smelling the air, which is like really dangerous because now
he has a taste for it and he knows he
(32:42):
can go back there. But Josh just like put his
arms out and.
Speaker 1 (32:45):
Like Joe, Josh looked like he was about to have
a fucking heart attack.
Speaker 3 (32:49):
He was literally literally like, oh.
Speaker 1 (32:51):
My god, Oh my god, that was so scary, because
I guess, yeah, to be the one to let a
zul out would be so gnarly.
Speaker 2 (32:57):
Also, me asking i's a door was closed.
Speaker 1 (33:00):
Half asleep just reminded me that I texted Kai the
other day this picture of Quentin Tarantino at a fortnite event.
Speaker 2 (33:09):
Oh wait, where the fuck is this? I texted him
this and I was like, what are your thoughts on it?
Speaker 1 (33:17):
And then I don't know why, I was like falling
asleep because I've been falling asleep so early.
Speaker 2 (33:21):
So I was like knocking out as I was texting
about it, and.
Speaker 1 (33:26):
Oh, Kai goes, I'm so excited, it's right by my house,
whole new chapter at Rocks, but only with people.
Speaker 2 (33:33):
And then half asleep.
Speaker 1 (33:34):
I literally Lisa and audio message I haven't really listened to,
but I thought he was saying that like Quinton Tarantino
was at a Fortnite event that you can play it
in person with other people.
Speaker 2 (33:47):
So I was imagining, like, one.
Speaker 1 (33:50):
Why has Kai gone to like an in real life
laser tag a Fortnite and hasn't mentioned it?
Speaker 2 (33:55):
And two why was quick?
Speaker 1 (33:57):
No?
Speaker 2 (33:58):
I would want to go too.
Speaker 1 (33:58):
But I'm saying, not mentioning, it is fucked up because like,
that's what I'm saying. And if I found out that
that was a thing and you had gone without us,
what I would do in retaliation is set up for
us to go but get an even better group of
people and have the best time ever. Talk to you
about it, so that you would have this good memory,
but then you would always like we'd.
Speaker 2 (34:19):
Have a connective memory in a sense.
Speaker 1 (34:21):
Yeah, but you're just you're the only one out of
our memory. So then it's like you were there with us,
but you didn't exist or we just didn't remember you
being there.
Speaker 4 (34:29):
Yeah. I would be happy for you guys, though, because
I'm like, if they're having a good time, even if
I'm not there, that's what I want. It's just for
you guys to be happy.
Speaker 3 (34:37):
I don't want that for you though. Thank you for
having that for me.
Speaker 2 (34:40):
Yeah, I'm glad someone out there have fun without me.
Speaker 5 (34:42):
Yeah, okay, well it is literally possible, not with just you.
Speaker 3 (34:50):
Every single bitch, Like if you're having fun without me,
like you're dead to me.
Speaker 1 (34:57):
I hate people having fun his friends, his close friends
having fun about him. I'm like, yeah, that without it's
like little SI. Yeah, because I was the older sibling
audio message. Oh it was me explaining, but I don't know.
I just remember I was laughing really hard.
Speaker 3 (35:18):
Literally I saw someone say to that picture.
Speaker 1 (35:21):
But then I saw that I just I essentially texted
you while I it literally is just me explained that
I was like half asleep, but I'm not kidding. I
was crying, laughing before I went to bed because in
my head, I like, I like literally fell asleep. I
remember I was watching Jinks. I had fallen asleep in
the middle of that conversation.
Speaker 2 (35:41):
I woke up and I texted.
Speaker 1 (35:42):
Back, Oh wait, what was making me laugh was the
way I fucking asked him about what it was.
Speaker 3 (35:48):
I saw someone respond to that picture saying, why does
he always pose like he's fine? And like, and then
I saw like a few pictures and like it really
does give like.
Speaker 2 (36:00):
He does he's.
Speaker 3 (36:03):
That he feels he's no, no, let me finish, he's sexy,
not physically, but with what he creates.
Speaker 2 (36:10):
I didn't even go that far.
Speaker 3 (36:12):
I love his movies, but I'm I'm a straight white guy. Like,
of course, I'm gonna love his movies. It is made
for you, like straight, like Tarantino made movies for straight guys.
Why do you keep repeating at well, be repeating what.
Speaker 2 (36:26):
It's like an affirmation and like manifesting them.
Speaker 4 (36:28):
Also, why would you bring up your sexuality do the movies?
Speaker 1 (36:33):
Because unless we're talking about like Barbie and the other one.
Speaker 3 (36:37):
Guys, I'm done. I'm done with living this lie. I'm
done living this lie. I'm gay. The way I wrote
that out rolling my eyes, fuck you, I was half asleep.
This is a problem I have when people I read
(36:59):
the wrong one. Every time, I'm like, it's fun.
Speaker 2 (37:04):
What did you mean? What is this place you've been?
Speaker 1 (37:08):
That's what made me laugh because I meant that so
genuinely because I was actually like, in my head, I
had fallen asleep and I think I fully imagine that place,
and I was like, damn, I want to go there.
Speaker 2 (37:16):
And I was like, what the that's just a place,
but I'm gonna I think I'm gonna steal Fortnite.
Speaker 1 (37:21):
I p and rent and like warehouse and do the
Willy Wonka chocolate factory thing, but with Fortnite, I p
and have a laser tag warehouse with like cutouts that
you get from Party City video.
Speaker 2 (37:37):
He has a parking Dubai.
Speaker 3 (37:41):
Oh yeah, and it's like that's real. It's scary. I
thought that was like that was straight up built by
slave labor, and I don't people talking about I don't.
Speaker 4 (37:49):
I thought it. I thought it was fake, but it
could be real. No, It's like.
Speaker 3 (37:55):
I cannot believe it, and like it popped up seemingly overnight,
and I'm like where we're to. Yeah, anything built in
Dubai overnight?
Speaker 2 (38:08):
Dubai period.
Speaker 4 (38:10):
Have you told them about your the set that you're
doing for the Odd Comedy Festival?
Speaker 3 (38:15):
No, I haven't yet. Guys, you're opening liner. I am
opening and headlining the Odd Comedy.
Speaker 2 (38:23):
Festival and we're so excited. Drew is the face of Dubai.
Speaker 3 (38:27):
I got paid one point two million dollars for a
thirty minute set and then three point eight for my
closing set.
Speaker 2 (38:36):
Oh my god, you got paid twice for the same
a million.
Speaker 1 (38:39):
That's crazy, that's kind of cheap because I heard they
paid a Z's twelve.
Speaker 3 (38:44):
But he's a ease, That's what I'm saying.
Speaker 4 (38:47):
I'm doing it for ak.
Speaker 5 (38:48):
So so you're just a bad person, Yeah, just a
piece of shit.
Speaker 2 (38:53):
Yeah, you just like want to be a part of it.
Speaker 4 (38:56):
I'm losing money on this tour.
Speaker 3 (38:58):
I'm losing my first class flight him their twelve thousand
dollars Quantis alone.
Speaker 2 (39:03):
To fly what's that one?
Speaker 3 (39:05):
Emirates Quantis are Emirates O the gold one. Yeah, he's
in the gold little pile.
Speaker 1 (39:10):
Oh my god, mister Bees was low key predictive programming
us to fuck with Dubai because he took that flight.
Speaker 3 (39:18):
There, Casey Nice, that too?
Speaker 2 (39:20):
Is Casey Nice? That fucking with that too?
Speaker 3 (39:21):
That's like Casey Nice Had's biggest video of all time
I think because him reviewing like the ten million fucking
there is dollar room. Oh well, guys, so you know
how I've been like doing my little DJ thing. Yeah, okay, Well,
(39:42):
we went to the Ropping concert, which I will get
into in a second. It was so much fucking fun.
But as we were walking by the front to go
into the Acne Studios line, someone walks by and says, hey,
look it's the DJs. Y'all were great. So I'm like
known as a fucking DJ now, Oh my gosh, yeah
(40:03):
it was. It was incredible, and then it was incredible.
And then I saw him at the Robin after party
at Honey's and he was couldn't take his eyes off
of us.
Speaker 2 (40:18):
Do you think he wants a hit?
Speaker 3 (40:19):
I mean maybe maybe would you would you let him
hit if he got you a good if you got
me a good set, yeah, you would let him hit. Yeah,
but I mean he was literally asking if, like for
my name so we could go DJ like he was like,
who were the DJs? They were great? And then we
saw him in person at the Robin concert.
Speaker 1 (40:40):
Yeah that's what they're gonna say about me when I
started DJing. I'm DJing my first thing tonight, so it's like,
no big deal, it's huge.
Speaker 3 (40:49):
I'm off the DJ bed with MC pillow at Club Blanket.
Speaker 2 (40:59):
I can't believe Michael Jackson held his baby blanket out.
Speaker 3 (41:03):
Babbio Jackson, y'all, we really need to talk about Jackson.
You are not jack No, I have been.
Speaker 2 (41:08):
Like Fabio Jackson is Michael Jackson.
Speaker 3 (41:12):
Oh I am like I think he's reincarnated, but no,
I'm so in deep into the Fabio Jackson Laura. And
then on top of that, I am now in deep
in the Rico MJ lore. Rico MJ is oh Rico
MJ is the one that slid across the dance floor.
Speaker 2 (41:29):
Like he's mad about the movie too.
Speaker 3 (41:31):
No, that's his like go to move, Like look, he
just does it all the time. So like the greatest
greatest video of all time. Hey, what's up? This is
Rico Michael Jackson tribute artist.
Speaker 1 (41:46):
So I've been seeing a lot of.
Speaker 3 (41:47):
People online trying to perfect perfect my reco MJ slide,
but like no, so like that's his fucking thing?
Speaker 2 (41:57):
Why does he What does he mean? People are trying
going to perfect his slide.
Speaker 3 (42:03):
It's like not even his. It's like Michael Jackson slove money.
Speaker 2 (42:07):
It's not even Michael Jackson's.
Speaker 1 (42:08):
The act of throwing your human body across the floor
like that.
Speaker 3 (42:12):
It's kind of like I saw, like, oh, what was it?
It was like Discord Daughter or like Scare actor Slider Son,
And I was like, I'm taking the Discord Daughter, but
like Scare actor Slider son, like, you know that archetype
of person.
Speaker 1 (42:29):
Dude, I would fucking hate to have a son who
was a scare actor.
Speaker 2 (42:33):
I would hate that. I'm sorry, as fucked you were.
Speaker 3 (42:40):
You were a bad person in a past life. You
committed crimes, hainous acts. I'm saying, if you have a
scare actor.
Speaker 1 (42:46):
Yeah, my son is a scared Well, if I have
a son, I think it'll be a.
Speaker 3 (42:49):
P Also on the same tip, on the same tip,
I'm like, I would be proud of my son no
matter what. One time, my dad looked at me in
the face and was like, I'm true, you know that,
Like I'll love you no matter what, no matter who
you want to be. It was so movie coded, and
he was talking about me being gay.
Speaker 1 (43:08):
Well, my mom, I was updating her on my romantic
life on the phone and then she goes.
Speaker 2 (43:15):
I forgot what I was saying. I was saying something,
and then she was.
Speaker 1 (43:18):
Like, yeah, because you like girls, but you like boys too, right,
Like you like boys too, rite you still there's still
a part of you that like you would like a boy,
you would still like be with boy.
Speaker 2 (43:27):
I was like yeah, and then she's like, oh, and.
Speaker 3 (43:29):
It's like, but boys too.
Speaker 2 (43:30):
Yeah, boys right, boys, but boys too.
Speaker 1 (43:33):
But honestly, trying to speak to my mom about anything
emotionally dense is so difficult, and it feels like if
somebody took acid and then got on duel lingo, Like
that is what's speaking to my mom in Spanish about
anything further than like anything about my personal life.
Speaker 3 (43:50):
Because I al such just or blinked with one eye.
It wasn't a wing.
Speaker 2 (43:54):
I'm a lizard.
Speaker 3 (43:55):
My mom can blink one eye at a time, like
she can do that like weird shit. Yeah, but like
it looks like not like squinting. Damn I forgot Oh
wait insert the video insert it.
Speaker 6 (44:11):
None Nope, none one as there is none and I suck.
Speaker 3 (44:20):
Damn I forgot.
Speaker 2 (44:23):
Two. Why isn't there surgery to make you sing better?
I'm not kidding, Like they have surgery for everything.
Speaker 1 (44:29):
You can get taller, you can get shorter, you can
get bigger boobs, smaller boobs, big butt, no, but more
thigh less thigh, But like, is there nothing they can
do to make you sing good?
Speaker 3 (44:39):
Because I mean, I have like vocal nodes surgery, but.
Speaker 1 (44:42):
Isn't that for like when you just get nodes on
your throat but I'm saying they probably can, like fuck
with your vocal cords or some ship.
Speaker 2 (44:50):
The notes she got taken out?
Speaker 3 (44:52):
I want her notes give? Did she have surgery?
Speaker 1 (44:56):
I'm pretty sure all of like the like top girls,
every top girl gets a node.
Speaker 2 (45:01):
You're not a diva without a note or two?
Speaker 3 (45:04):
Does Sabrina Carpenter haven't note?
Speaker 1 (45:06):
I'm hoping she doesn't, and maybe she could be one
of the revolutionary women.
Speaker 3 (45:10):
It's bad at singing. That's why I'm so bad at singing,
because I have nodes.
Speaker 1 (45:13):
Yeah, we gotta get those rud and then you're gonna
sound like a beautiful, fucking well oiled w You know
what's weird?
Speaker 4 (45:20):
Drew?
Speaker 1 (45:21):
When we get in bed, sometimes he'll roll around and
I have to oil him up with WD forty because
he squeaks. His joints squeak because he's full of what's
that stuff?
Speaker 3 (45:32):
Come?
Speaker 2 (45:32):
Yeah, he's full of come. So the oil like really, like.
Speaker 4 (45:37):
Is that true, Drew? Are you full of com Yes?
Speaker 2 (45:39):
It's kind of like paint thinner the oil the W
D forty, Well.
Speaker 3 (45:42):
I am like, what is it called? No fat vibes?
Speaker 4 (45:47):
Yeah? No fat vibes?
Speaker 2 (45:48):
Yeah, have no fat, no fat no nut November.
Speaker 1 (45:51):
That's all the things talking about, like a real recession indicators.
Speaker 2 (45:55):
Nobody is doing no nut nov going from.
Speaker 3 (46:00):
That we have going from October to no not November
is like really crazy for mon is locked. It's like
chastity belt shit, is.
Speaker 2 (46:11):
That actually a thing?
Speaker 1 (46:12):
Yeah, I've been looking at chastity belts, and per usual,
women's chastity belts are better than men's chastity belts, just
like with every kind of fashion, women's is always going
to be better.
Speaker 2 (46:21):
Well, the men's.
Speaker 1 (46:22):
Chastity belts penis like the penis part, Like.
Speaker 2 (46:26):
That's fucking disgusting.
Speaker 1 (46:27):
Like, you know, the whole point of a chassis belt
is it's supposed to be like underwear.
Speaker 2 (46:31):
No, like it's just supposed to be like normal underwear.
Wise you're fucking dingling there, Like that's disgusting.
Speaker 3 (46:35):
Wait, Have I told y'all that there's this tick that
if it bites you, it gives you like a meat allergy. No, yeah,
you get allergic. You get allergic to red meat.
Speaker 2 (46:45):
Has has anybody died from that?
Speaker 3 (46:47):
Well, someone just died from it.
Speaker 1 (46:51):
The amount of times I've been tagged in the meat eating.
Speaker 2 (46:55):
Tick that killed somebody because of fucking.
Speaker 1 (46:57):
DG mentioning it all every fucking episode, every time you
say big things are coming, big things.
Speaker 3 (47:02):
Are earthquake, earthquake weather. It's an earthquake weather, big earthquake coming.
Speaker 1 (47:06):
You say that, You literally say that at any weather,
like any time of the year.
Speaker 2 (47:10):
Drew can walk outside and be like, this's earthquake weather.
That's earthquake weather. Is there.
Speaker 1 (47:16):
Actually, we've talked about this before. There's no such thing
as earthquake weather.
Speaker 3 (47:19):
No, no, what.
Speaker 2 (47:21):
Did you know?
Speaker 1 (47:21):
There's no such thing as tornado weather either. They make tornadoes.
You know, the government is making.
Speaker 3 (47:25):
The tornadoes, right, conspiracy.
Speaker 1 (47:28):
The government's making the tornadoes. They're doing the cloud seating.
Well that's real, I know. But you keep saying there's
a website to track it. But I haven't looked, and
I don't believe you.
Speaker 4 (47:37):
You know, they have Grinder.
Speaker 3 (47:40):
Let's Grinder.
Speaker 4 (47:42):
It's a social media app.
Speaker 2 (47:44):
What's the other one? Sniffies.
Speaker 3 (47:46):
You saying the word Sniffies to me is horrifying.
Speaker 4 (47:49):
Someone dress?
Speaker 3 (47:51):
Yeah, one of my friends dressed up as Sniffyes for Halloween.
Speaker 2 (47:55):
That's amazing. Yeah, well I got banned.
Speaker 3 (47:57):
Should I do some ziops?
Speaker 1 (47:59):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (48:00):
Eyes, I haven't done siof in so long on.
Speaker 2 (48:04):
The curse has been lifted. We're we're in better place.
Speaker 3 (48:07):
We have sig up cornerback, Gay Thought or Sun Daughter.
If you unplug the Wi Fi box for one second,
the whole house start acting like they're gonna die. You'll
see people coming out of rooms you've never seen before.
Speaker 2 (48:27):
That's to get you and Josh out of your rooms.
Speaker 1 (48:29):
You and Josh, You and Josh get the most use
out of your bedrooms out of any adults I've ever met.
Speaker 3 (48:36):
Yeah, it's my sacred safe space. And what about it?
Speaker 2 (48:39):
Well, there's a sacred safe fly playing in your hair
right now. There's literally a fly.
Speaker 3 (48:46):
Kai's breath smell like he hasn't said a word in
three days. Whenever I have buffalo wings, I wipe my
hands on Enya's cat and he starts screaming.
Speaker 2 (49:01):
Oh my god, Azuel.
Speaker 1 (49:02):
I've been painting a lot and a zool keeps coming
up to me to like get pets for me. And
the other day I smeared a bunch of uh orange
like stuff on his head, but you couldn't really tell
because he has the orange spots on his head, so's
no one can tell that I'm poisoning my cat with
oil paint.
Speaker 3 (49:19):
When your boyfriend is having a bad day, ask if
he's mad at you. Follow for more relationship advice.
Speaker 1 (49:29):
I'm not kidding. I actually don't know if I'm meant,
I don't. I already know I'm not in a place
to be in a relationship with the idea of anybody,
let alone a man texting my phone about a bad
day he had actually makes me want to fucking hit somebody, Like,
oh my god, that's like kind of the worst part
about having a partner is having to act like one
you give a fuck about dreams, like you have.
Speaker 3 (49:51):
To Oh my god, I can't believe that happens someone
to act. I never shut the fuck up about my godda.
I'm dreams. My dreams means so much to me. But
like all I dream about now is like me biting
so hard in my sleep that my teeth turned the powder.
Speaker 1 (50:10):
Well, I had a dream all my teeth fell up,
but I just kept pushing, like I literally I was
like talking to y'all at a restaurant or something, and
then my teeth fell out, and I just started spitting
my teeth in my hand and literally throwing on my
god like that, and all of y'all were like, oh
my god, your teeth are falling out, and I was like,
it's hot.
Speaker 4 (50:31):
Oh my god.
Speaker 3 (50:31):
I was going to say something I hate when someone
cars stink. What the fuck you driving with your ass open?
What the fuck are you doing driving with your ass open?
Speaker 2 (50:44):
Oh my god? Fuck? Wait, I'm not kidding.
Speaker 1 (50:45):
I was on such Oh wait, yeah, the worst part
about dating somebody is having to listen to their dream
one and then two having to act like you care
about like their work day that makes sense, Like it
just gets to a point or maybe the you know,
that's just proof I shouldn't be I.
Speaker 2 (51:04):
Just couldn't give. Yeah, I'm not ready, I'm not there.
Speaker 1 (51:07):
I just like I'm not in a place where I
really have any more space to give a single funk
about anybody else. Like my roster in terms of emotional
bandwidth is at like top to even if I met
the baddest boy or girl, I'm girl.
Speaker 3 (51:26):
No, no, no, don't say that, not at dinner over coffee.
Speaker 2 (51:34):
Are you seriously coming out to me while we're having coffee?
Speaker 3 (51:36):
And how is a girl gonna date a girl.
Speaker 2 (51:40):
That doesn't even make sense? How does that work?
Speaker 1 (51:42):
But yeah, I'm down for either, but maybe not right
now because I'm not kidding either one unless you better
have the best days ever.
Speaker 2 (51:49):
Like I don't want to hear about a bad day.
I just don't want to hear any more negative.
Speaker 4 (51:52):
See.
Speaker 3 (51:52):
No, my I'm like the opposite. I'm like, I would
much rather hear about a bad day. Really, yeah, I
just what my partner like suffering?
Speaker 2 (52:02):
Yeah, so that their only point of positivity is you.
Speaker 3 (52:05):
Yeah, and then like, well, like that's the whole thing.
Is like they come to me with their problems and
then I make them laugh and they get addicted to me.
It's like nicotine. I also put just make them laugh.
Well no, I also put nicotine patches on them when
they sleep next to me.
Speaker 1 (52:21):
Well yeah, I actually I got banned from Sniffy's because
I kept meeting up with people and slipping in an
AirPod in their ass. No, and I shouldn't have done that,
and it did get me banns. But I think I
can like do something about.
Speaker 3 (52:34):
You ever made up a fake story and a
Speaker 1 (53:00):
Yah
Make hi, guys, welcome to this episode of Emergency in
or Calm.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
You might be like, oh my god, where are they?
Means you're starting a business.
Speaker 3 (00:27):
We're starting a beautiful cafe business full of the.
Speaker 2 (00:30):
Beautiful cafe in Texas. I'm kidding. No, we're on the
way to Texas because Drew and.
Speaker 3 (00:35):
Guys, we have a surprise for y'all.
Speaker 4 (00:38):
Daddy came coming.
Speaker 3 (00:42):
Coming to Texas. He's going to see my hometown.
Speaker 2 (00:44):
Because in that book you read what is it?
Speaker 1 (00:46):
The is it the Seven Power Ship, The when you
read to manipulate people for the rest of your life.
Speaker 3 (00:50):
He tried to get that. He loves that.
Speaker 4 (00:52):
I don't love.
Speaker 2 (00:53):
He's really trying to get Drew to read that.
Speaker 4 (00:54):
I've never even read that book.
Speaker 1 (00:56):
He was like, you should read it because it worked
so well. But one of the steps is getting close
to someone's family right so that you can manipulate them
from the inside.
Speaker 4 (01:03):
I'm just finding that out now because I've never read it,
and I don't even know what that book is.
Speaker 2 (01:08):
Have you actually never read that? You've read that?
Speaker 4 (01:10):
No, I haven't. I actually did start it.
Speaker 1 (01:12):
I read the back of it before, and now you
like mention it in conversation.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
Actually know you've always mentioned it in conversation.
Speaker 3 (01:19):
Is like, if you read that, you're a scary motherfucker. Yeah,
that's that.
Speaker 2 (01:24):
Maybe that's why I think you read it.
Speaker 4 (01:26):
I started it, but then I got bored, and then
I read something that was more like feminine.
Speaker 3 (01:32):
My year of rest and relaxation and the body keeps
the score.
Speaker 4 (01:34):
Body keeps the score. Cracked the bell jar, and then
you cracked it. I cracked it. Oh you're talking about
cracking the bell jar.
Speaker 2 (01:48):
Oh no, you were talking about cracking the bell jar,
which is like a really odd thing.
Speaker 3 (01:51):
This, do your job better? What we need? Less cuts?
Speaker 4 (01:55):
Less cuts?
Speaker 1 (01:56):
Okay, Well, before we left on our road trip, me
and Josh literally reached flow state with each other in
terms of bullying. Kai Like, he got over and was
checking through his bag before he left to make sure
we have everything for the podcast, and he pulled out
this weird ass thing of batteries and Josh just over
his shoulder, was like, you have all those fucking batteries?
Speaker 2 (02:15):
Like, or what do you say to you?
Speaker 4 (02:16):
I have a case that also acts as a charger
for my batteries. And he was like, why do you
have a case for your batteries and then and you
destroyed me too. I forget what she said because I
blacked out from fear.
Speaker 3 (02:26):
But the thing is is it wasn't even bullying. Kai
is just so used to y'all bullying him say I'm
sticking up for you, that any comments towards him just
become immediately bullying.
Speaker 1 (02:37):
Yeah, so what you're saying is it's kind of how
you take it. And since you decide to take it
like that, you decided to take it from the back.
Speaker 2 (02:43):
No one told you to take it from the back.
Speaker 1 (02:45):
When you take your your comments from other people from
the back, I do.
Speaker 4 (02:49):
I prefer it that way.
Speaker 3 (02:50):
Well, guys, Andya is pregnant after being celibate for four months,
five months, six months. Somehow she's like mother Mary. She
has a baby growing inside of her.
Speaker 5 (02:58):
It's crazy.
Speaker 1 (02:59):
I know, I think they're three. I'm like starting to like,
I think it's triplets. I think I might get up
to quadruplets. Oh my god, imagine me with the longest stomachant.
Speaker 3 (03:09):
One of my favorite tweets I ever made when I
was still on Twitter was like this woman had like
the world's largest belly, Like it was like literally like
eight feet long and she had like octuplets in it,
and like I put that picture and then the next
picture was like a video of me like crawling around
in my sheets with a red light on, like I
was like inside, like hitting the walls. Let me help,
(03:30):
please let this belly like a grown ass man being
inside of a pregnant woman's belly. That's like a king.
Speaker 1 (03:37):
That's yeah, I was gonna say, because we've stumbled on
that before, We've stumbled on those videos, and.
Speaker 3 (03:41):
We've talked about it extensively.
Speaker 2 (03:43):
We really love.
Speaker 4 (03:45):
War for consume another.
Speaker 3 (03:48):
Yeah, when you eat people.
Speaker 1 (03:50):
Well Drew saying that because all my periods are getting
like literally worse and worse, and now when I start
my period, the first two days, I'm genuinely having to
remind myself there's no way I'm passing a miscarriage.
Speaker 2 (04:02):
I'm like, there's no way, Like it's so much blood.
It literally feels like the shining, Like I don't know
what's happening.
Speaker 1 (04:10):
The older I get, I guess I'm just becoming more
of a woman because my period is really fucking psycho.
The past two days, I've wanted to actually like stab
everyone in the house and then kill myself.
Speaker 3 (04:21):
Oh my god, not actually, but you know, oh.
Speaker 4 (04:24):
Fuck, I forgot the thing that you're supposed to microwave.
I got you this thing to put on.
Speaker 5 (04:29):
Your Is this the surprise?
Speaker 4 (04:31):
No? No, I I've been talking.
Speaker 3 (04:33):
About a surprise for three months now.
Speaker 1 (04:35):
He's doing the thing men do when like they don't
have to act on the thing you crave.
Speaker 2 (04:42):
If they keep saying they're gonna.
Speaker 4 (04:43):
Do, you guys are gonna look so stupid when I do. Surprise.
Speaker 3 (04:45):
Oh I got I actually am it's gonna be cool.
Speaker 4 (04:48):
But that's on the surprise. I just heard that your
periods were bad, so I bought you some like a
thing to put on your stomach to help with the pain.
Speaker 3 (04:54):
But I rub her But I did not buy that.
Speaker 4 (04:57):
No, I didn't.
Speaker 2 (04:58):
Yeah, like, what the fuck are you talking?
Speaker 3 (04:59):
I rub her about in her back. Yeah, every night
for her because she sleeps next to me in bed.
We were in bed last night at ten pm, Like,
we fell asleep at ten pm and woke up at
six am to get her ass.
Speaker 2 (05:13):
We were I was dead asleep by ten thirty.
Speaker 3 (05:16):
Yeah. It was like it was a beautiful thing, and
I was like, oh, this is something I should talk about.
I think I am slowly but surely getting addicted to
melotonin because I had it like two nights in a row,
and I wasn't told that the pills I was taking
was twelve milligrams of melatonin.
Speaker 1 (05:37):
Oh wait, so the first two times you took it
was twelve milligrams.
Speaker 3 (05:40):
No, I bit them in half. So I was taking
six milligrams, which is still far too much melatonin to
put your body. But the way I felt on six
milligrams of melatonin kind of rewired my brain in a
way that I wasn't prepared for. And now I just
like think about getting high all the time, and like,
so I'm taking six milligramston in before bed every single night,
(06:02):
and when I want to stop, Oh, I found out.
I found out that I bought a bottle of three
hundred count melatonin. So it's twelve milligrams each three hundred pills.
If I bite them in thirds every single night, I
have nine hundred doses of melatonin. So three years of
melatonin for seventeen dollars. Who's doing it like me? Who's
(06:22):
frugal like me?
Speaker 2 (06:25):
Dude? Honestly, no one. It's kind of drawing.
Speaker 1 (06:27):
Sometimes, Like my dude, he did that math on the way,
like on the drive. He just said that out loud
and we were like, why did you say that?
Speaker 2 (06:38):
And it's because at what time was that, like eight am?
Speaker 1 (06:41):
He was already thinking about the melatonin he's going to
take tonight. So I lovedy who is fully already like
he's like telling us this because we're very similar in
the sense that I started mentioning weed once I was
already mad addicted, Like once I was like completely like
bound by it.
Speaker 2 (06:57):
That's when I was like I was high. I was high.
Speaker 1 (06:58):
I was high, and you are prepping You're what's it called?
What does mister beasts do with war crimes?
Speaker 3 (07:05):
Oh? Predictive programming?
Speaker 2 (07:07):
Yeah, you're predictive programming your mind.
Speaker 3 (07:09):
It feels so it feels so good, Like I'm not
even kidding, Like I literally, like for five minutes before
I fall asleep, my body is buzzing. It's not like
a warm, fuzzy, euphoric feeling. It's just like almost like
a vibration to my body.
Speaker 2 (07:24):
Do you get really anxious before you go to sleep?
Speaker 1 (07:27):
Yeah, So that probably is just alleviating in general, because
you rarely go to bed with whimsy in your heart.
Speaker 3 (07:34):
It's it's it's really crazy.
Speaker 4 (07:36):
I'm addicted to wrapping my hands around like a warm
cup of coffee and curling.
Speaker 3 (07:42):
It is fall, it's almost winter, but no melatonin is
fucking lit. I'm feeling great, like I'm sleeping better. But
it is crazy how I have been just like suffering
like anxiety attacks every single night for the last like
nine months of my life. Like literally I've just been like,
(08:02):
like you know how there's like high functioning alcoholics or
high functioning drug addicts. I'm literally a high functioning like
anxiety sufferer, Like I am in a constant state of
fear and panic. But I do a good job at
like masking it.
Speaker 2 (08:14):
Well.
Speaker 1 (08:14):
I think that's why I've become so addicted to weed,
because I actually couldn't give a fuck. The mix of
weed in my prozac has definitely jailed me in some ways,
but freed me in so many other ways.
Speaker 2 (08:27):
Like it doesn't even matter, like I don't care because
I just I couldn't. Actually sometimes it's a bit worrying.
It's a little worried, yeah, because I really couldn't give
a fuck.
Speaker 1 (08:35):
The fact that I hit my head as hard as
I did, like two weeks ago, and I didn't go
to the hospital.
Speaker 2 (08:39):
That has been something I've thought about. Also, Josie said
he had a dream.
Speaker 1 (08:44):
Fuck I wish, I wish we could call him.
Speaker 2 (08:47):
But he said he had a dream that I hit
my head again. You have a dream that that dream
dream y'all.
Speaker 3 (08:54):
Know that one video, that one meme.
Speaker 2 (08:56):
I don't So you really are scared.
Speaker 4 (08:59):
I know.
Speaker 6 (09:02):
Have you ever had a dreams that that you you
had you you you could you do? You want you
you could do so you you do you could you want?
You want him to do?
Speaker 3 (09:17):
You so much?
Speaker 6 (09:18):
You could do anything?
Speaker 1 (09:21):
Oh, he had a dream that I hit my head
again and that I was like whatever, and I didn't
go to the hospital. And then the next day I
guess I like shaved the back of my head because
it felt weird. And he said that I have like
I had like the substance type of just like mutated
infected like pussy back of my head and that I
(09:41):
was really like just like oh.
Speaker 2 (09:43):
Whatever, it's yeah, it's bad.
Speaker 1 (09:46):
I know, Like I was like that, and the dream
like I was just like so like it was like embarrassing,
Like I was really embarrassed of my pussy head, my
pussy head.
Speaker 3 (09:56):
Not making you laugh, was like, well, this is awesome,
an exciting development in my entire life, Like one of
the most my entire life, one of the most exciting
developments in my life as a grown ass man. But
I finally got sent nudes to my business email, and
like it was really impressive, Like it was.
Speaker 2 (10:19):
You're saying that, and the person is going to think
you want.
Speaker 3 (10:22):
More and no, no, no, well because I'm going to
read them to filth because I know the tricks, buddy,
I know the tricks. Like it's all perspective, Like it's
all perspective, like he's playing perspective games with his wiener
to make it look girthier and longer than.
Speaker 4 (10:36):
It actually a wide angle.
Speaker 3 (10:37):
Yeah yeah, yeah, you like tilted up a little bit.
Speaker 4 (10:40):
I don't. I only know that because I do stuff
with video and I know how how perspectives work.
Speaker 3 (10:45):
I've read.
Speaker 4 (10:46):
Yeah, you know, it's actually crazy. I've never taken a picture,
even for me to look at you.
Speaker 2 (10:52):
I've never taken a picture ever. Well oh wait, that
makes no sense. You're so old. Have you avoided a.
Speaker 4 (10:57):
Camera that No, I'm talking about a naughty picture. I've
never taken one of those of my like, oh, yeah,
sorry that the headphones went not I just have never
done it. Sorry, but you guys can go back to talking.
Speaker 3 (11:16):
Guy, that was so scary.
Speaker 4 (11:18):
Fly flew into my ear and then it pulled out
the headphones.
Speaker 3 (11:23):
There are a lot of flies in this fucking restaurant.
Speaker 2 (11:28):
That they're gonna spin.
Speaker 1 (11:35):
But yeah, no, I can't say the same, And I
don't even want to talk about it because.
Speaker 2 (11:41):
I'm so scared.
Speaker 3 (11:42):
No, I've taken so many nudes it's like really crazy.
Speaker 1 (11:45):
I think I just don't it's different for gay guys
to that big of a deal.
Speaker 2 (11:51):
Yeah, I think both of us live in the same
world where I'm like, I don't think it's that deep.
Speaker 3 (11:54):
It's it's really it's really not that deep now, Like
I do find like sexting a little fun.
Speaker 1 (12:00):
Me Like, yeah, i think I'm a bit past the
point of sexting other than like, if sexting lasts more
than like seven seconds, more than like a seven text
back and forth, what the fuck are we doing it?
Speaker 3 (12:14):
Actually, go drive over fly here.
Speaker 1 (12:19):
Like also, most of you aren't really good with words.
We're going through like a literacy epidemic. Sexting is definitely
on the decline because half of you also can't describe
what you would even do if you were with someone
because a lot you.
Speaker 3 (12:33):
Get there and you sit on the edge of the
bed all like anxiously. It's like I thought you were
a freak. I thought you were a freaking No, but
that's who I am. I'm like, I can get like
real fucking freaky and creepy over text. Well not creepy,
but I can get real freaky. But it is it
is like a flow state that you enter, Like I like,
right now, I'm trying to think, like what I would
(12:54):
say if I was in a situation like that, and
like nothing comes to mind. But when I'm in that
flow state and I'm bouncing off that person, like kind
of becomes like a little fun game, a little little thing.
Speaker 2 (13:05):
And you're talking about sex.
Speaker 3 (13:07):
Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah.
Speaker 1 (13:12):
I kind of think it's a lost art form because
I guess sex to get away is like for play,
but again with literacy down, Oh my god, I wonder
how many people have used cha GBT to sex.
Speaker 3 (13:22):
Wait, what the fuck is going on with my phone?
Like I truly don't understand how to use this shit anymore.
Like the fucking camera roll is a piece of dog shit.
Wait where Like, literally, how do I get to my photos?
Speaker 2 (13:35):
This reminds me of my teacher I had a relationship with.
Speaker 1 (13:41):
How he used to always say that Apple was too
complicated and that he liked Samsung because it was simple.
Speaker 2 (13:46):
And now watching you use this, I'm like, yeah.
Speaker 3 (13:48):
I guess I I I too had an inappropriate relationship
with the teacher that I haven't really talked about because
I don't know if it was weird, but he did
name one of his twins after me, Like twelve years
later he named his child Drew.
Speaker 2 (14:04):
I mean it's also a really common name.
Speaker 3 (14:06):
But no, like the relationship we had was kind of
it was kind of weird, like nothing actually happened, but
like he would like come to my house and he
would make me do the do it like Bernie dance
and I used to be like, oh, he thinks the
dance is funny, But I really think he liked seeing
my Wiener bulge.
Speaker 2 (14:25):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (14:25):
I definite had inappropriate relations with a teacher. Not anything crazy,
but there were definitely teachers who were way I was
way too close to. And when I say teachers, I
mean one teacher who like one time he was like,
I would marry you if you were an adult.
Speaker 2 (14:38):
And I was like, oh my god, thank you so much.
I would marry you too.
Speaker 4 (14:41):
Did you see that Trump lost his voice shouting about
trade Actually yeah, people reporters were like, why is your
voice rasped me, and he said, because he was shouting
about trade policy.
Speaker 3 (14:53):
And then did you see Trump fall in love with Mandani?
Speaker 4 (14:57):
Yes? It was.
Speaker 3 (14:58):
It was a beautiful thing and I'm not gonna lie
it for half a second. Broke my reality, and I
was like, oh, Trump's just like a sweet little old man,
like he like has a little crush on this guy
because famously he sucks stick and balls.
Speaker 1 (15:11):
Yeah, but he was swooing. I know, his fucking little
boxer briefs were moistish pitched, like his butthole was fucking quaking.
You know when you have to ship so bad your
cheeks starts sweating. He was having that from needing something
in his ass so bad.
Speaker 3 (15:29):
I need him, but I need to clarify immediately, I
came back to reality and hated the man. Yeah, I
hate the Orange Man. Anybody else here else, anybody else here?
Speaker 1 (15:43):
Okay, don't be too loud because we are in Texas,
so like, actually, Joe, you're like screaming, like literally, bit,
we're gonna get fucking followed home. Me Andrew have the
privilege of just being like a very gorgeous white couple
off of like face value, you know that that that.
Speaker 2 (16:01):
Gives us the privilege to drive across. And then I
feel like a cockway.
Speaker 1 (16:05):
I give like ambiguous mm hmm, and what yeah, until
you speak.
Speaker 3 (16:14):
But like until I speak, I physically like ambiguous.
Speaker 2 (16:18):
I think no.
Speaker 1 (16:18):
I think even when you speak, people think you're straight,
at least when we're together, because like I think older
people just look at us and you they're like, oh,
you know those new waves. They're like, oh, the guy's gay,
but he's not. And the girls also gay because.
Speaker 4 (16:34):
She works so many of my friends from like college
in high school. I just think that I do a
podcast with a couple, like a straight couple. They've seen
clips and they just think that you're straight. And then
I asked my friend. He he was like, well, he's gay,
and he said, I just assume he joked about being
gay all the time.
Speaker 3 (16:52):
No. Also, okay, I like literally couldn't take his eyes
off of me today.
Speaker 2 (16:56):
Oh my god, are you getting the butterflies over drew.
Speaker 4 (16:59):
I got butterflies.
Speaker 3 (17:00):
I mean, I hope I look the same as I
did earlier, but like, oh my god, I looked so
good earlier, and I think.
Speaker 2 (17:07):
Today is kind of one of my busted days.
Speaker 1 (17:08):
I started my period, so I'm in that weird like
in between where.
Speaker 2 (17:12):
I used to do my hair.
Speaker 3 (17:14):
I refuse to drive well.
Speaker 2 (17:16):
I also refused to sit passenger seat.
Speaker 4 (17:20):
It said.
Speaker 2 (17:24):
I hit a fan with my car. I got into
a minor event.
Speaker 1 (17:29):
I didn't tell you, but leaving the Okay, So me
and Oriyan went you did, so we're to God, but
I have no way of connecting. Okay, So me and
Orian go to this Hamnet screening.
Speaker 2 (17:40):
That movie is lit.
Speaker 3 (17:42):
I can't believe you have kept this.
Speaker 1 (17:44):
Because I almost literally immediately texted you and called you.
But I was like, I'm gonna save it because it's
so fucking funny. But me and Orian were leaving the screening,
it's like nine pm or some shit, and I'm driving
behind this car there in front of me. It's a stoplight,
but it's one of those things that's like there's a
right turning lane, a left turning lane, and then a
(18:05):
front turning lane. And I was I had just grabbed
my purse because I was looking for my fucking.
Speaker 2 (18:10):
Vape and I was like digging in there.
Speaker 1 (18:13):
And then I like from the corner of my eye
saw like the green light, so like I didn't accelerate.
I just lifted my foot and like as I was, yeah,
my car was like idling, and I just.
Speaker 3 (18:25):
Like and like, how do you know it was a fan?
Speaker 2 (18:29):
Bruh, let me finish the fucking story.
Speaker 1 (18:31):
Actually, if a fan like saying that is actually a
stretch because she didn't say all that, let's be clear.
Speaker 3 (18:39):
But we got on and I was like Mama talking
about water.
Speaker 2 (18:43):
Because literally I was so embarrassed because my purse.
Speaker 1 (18:45):
Was like on my lap and I'm like I had
pulled all my stuff out, so like all over my
car now is like makeup, lipliners, edibles, weed, like dead vapes,
empty jewel packs.
Speaker 2 (18:56):
And I was like, oh my god, I literally gone out.
Speaker 1 (18:59):
I was like, oh my god that we pulled over
and I got out and her car was completely untouched.
Like her car was completely fine. Also when I hit
that car, me and O Ryan both at the exact
same time.
Speaker 3 (19:10):
Oh, it was like, oh my god, Ryan is the
common denominator. Bitch, she crashed with me in the fucking car,
almost took my goddamn line. Yeah, almost killed me. And
now you she almost killed.
Speaker 2 (19:24):
Because she was distracting me.
Speaker 1 (19:26):
Because if you were a good friend, why why wouldn't
you get my vape out of my purse for me?
Speaker 2 (19:30):
And I know that you should.
Speaker 3 (19:32):
She should read your mind exactly.
Speaker 2 (19:33):
She should have been like Enya hasn't hit her vape
in the past two minutes?
Speaker 1 (19:37):
Been in the car? Yeah, I do, and you just
put it up to my mouth. They put a lot
of stuff up to my mouth.
Speaker 3 (19:43):
Just what you know, I need it exactly finish.
Speaker 1 (19:46):
But we got out of the car, we pulled over,
and I'm like standing outside and.
Speaker 2 (19:50):
I like literally didn't know what to do because I.
Speaker 1 (19:52):
Also haven't gotten into any like actually, this is the
second time.
Speaker 3 (19:56):
You've been in like four rags.
Speaker 2 (19:58):
No, okay, like.
Speaker 1 (20:01):
Rex, I'm not getting into car wrecks, babes, don't even
I'm not don't say I'm not even getting car bombs?
Speaker 3 (20:08):
Bomb? Wait, should I ask the waiter for bombs in.
Speaker 2 (20:14):
Waco, Texas?
Speaker 4 (20:16):
Bom Hey? Does anybody hear any here? Teacon?
Speaker 3 (20:20):
I didn't get a bomb. I didn't get to get out.
Speaker 1 (20:25):
We get out and I'm just like looking and there's
nothing on the car, and I'm not getting I thought
about just driving away, like and I was like, well,
there's nothing on the car. I don't know who's in
the car, and like I was just freaking out. And
then I'm like standing there and I literally out loud,
I was like, well, are you gonna get out?
Speaker 2 (20:41):
Like I think I said something like that. Well, like
I said it out loud, I didn't. We were on
a main street to the side on like I think it.
Speaker 1 (20:50):
Was down Wiltshire or some ship like that or like Olympic.
So I was like, I was too scared to get
in the road because I have heard of too many
horror stories of people getting into car accidents and then
pulling over at the side and then getting hit by
a car while they're trying to like manage the car accident.
So I didn't want to get in the street, and
I didn't really know what to do. So I was
just standing in the back of her car, and I
(21:12):
was too scared to go up to the window.
Speaker 2 (21:13):
So I guess I kind of us to her.
Speaker 7 (21:15):
I was like, are you gonna should I come like
I literally was just like so on and she got
out and I'm like, yeah, there's like I don't see anything,
but like if you want, like I can give you
my number.
Speaker 1 (21:26):
And I was kind of leading the conversation, but it
really was like just four pretty girls standing in the street.
Speaker 3 (21:31):
Like it was a very like a man there, like me,
like a big strong man to kind of facilitate and
like just make sure.
Speaker 2 (21:40):
Everybody is an extra gig eye to crash into.
Speaker 3 (21:43):
The to crash up the bumper.
Speaker 2 (21:47):
But yeah, there was like no like sign of anything.
Speaker 1 (21:49):
But I gave her my number because I was like, oh,
if you, like if in the daytime you see something
and you want to like hit me up. And then
her friend we were all standing there, and then her
friend just like turned to O'Ryan and was like, I
know who you guys are, by the way, this is
so funny, and then like the like manger. I don't
remember what she said. And I also don't remember their
names because I was literally in a state a full
panic because.
Speaker 3 (22:09):
You probably shouldn't share their names either.
Speaker 1 (22:11):
Yeah, true, true, true, But she has my fucking phone number.
Speaker 2 (22:15):
But I was just laughing and I was like I'm
so sorry.
Speaker 1 (22:17):
I was literally digging in my bag for my vape.
Speaker 2 (22:20):
But I just we were cracking up.
Speaker 1 (22:22):
And then we drove off and me and Ern were
literally just dying laughing from us, both screaming, and she
just kept being like, I had a premonition. I literally
knew this was going to happen. I knew I was
gonna get yeah, or I was like, I knew something
was gonna happen today.
Speaker 2 (22:35):
I just knew it. I just knew it. So thankfully
that was the car scent. But yeah, I hit a
fans car. Wow, And that was my story. It's not
that crazy.
Speaker 3 (22:42):
But when you were digging for a vape, yeah, oh
my god, I got the vape. Though I got it.
Did you hit it in front of them?
Speaker 2 (22:50):
Yeah? It was in my hand. Oh wow, I was
literally standing outside it was.
Speaker 1 (22:53):
But it was one of these like when it's like
really bold in your fist.
Speaker 3 (22:57):
Oh yeah, like you.
Speaker 2 (22:58):
Can't even hide that you're hitting it.
Speaker 3 (23:00):
Because because also everybody knows that trick by now, I know. Well,
speaking of vapes, they found fecal matter inside vapes, So
we are literally smoking on ship turns every every time
we hit it. Yeah, we're literally smoking on dookie pack
like parts and crap and ship like. That's good though,
(23:21):
but I think that's why it tastes so good.
Speaker 2 (23:23):
Yeah, that's I was gonna say.
Speaker 4 (23:26):
Don't think poop tastes bad.
Speaker 1 (23:29):
That's not really what we were saying. You know, we
were saying like fecal like particles. You're saying poop doesn't
taste bad.
Speaker 3 (23:38):
Full ship, you eat turds.
Speaker 4 (23:40):
Well, I thought you guys were talking about something else.
I'm sorry.
Speaker 3 (23:44):
I think we should just move on because this is
really revealing. No, I eat shit.
Speaker 4 (23:51):
Too, eat ship all the time, a big fat, stinky ship.
Speaker 1 (23:59):
Well, I've decided getting close to your father as an
adult is the equivalent to trip sitting somebody doing shrooms.
Speaker 2 (24:08):
That's what it feels like. But I don't know if
you would agree.
Speaker 3 (24:12):
Getting close to your father's trip sitting someone for shrooms or.
Speaker 1 (24:15):
Not trip sitting, but like hanging out with somebody after
they do shrooms.
Speaker 2 (24:19):
Like every time I see my dad, each time we have.
Speaker 3 (24:22):
A conversation, especial as they get older.
Speaker 1 (24:24):
Yeah, like they're slowly microudosing into like a different reality.
Speaker 3 (24:28):
Yeah yeah, yeah, I mean it's like that thing where
it's like, oh, a straight man only gains empathy in
general after doing mushrooms. It's like literally like the same idea.
It's like my father like aging has made him so
empathetic and he's like a sweet man now. But it
makes me like so happy but also sad because like
the day my parents die, bitch, I'm fucking killing myself.
(24:50):
My parents died just randomly. I would hang myself, No,
it does. I wouldn't hang myself. I would like run
away and like dive into icy cold waters or something.
Speaker 1 (25:00):
You can't even get in a river on a hot day, yeah,
but like diving into icy cold I.
Speaker 3 (25:06):
Want to get like Titanic and drama. Like I feel like.
Speaker 2 (25:09):
You're gonna eat your three year supply of meloton.
Speaker 3 (25:12):
He's gonna eat. I mean they taste good as fun too,
that's the crazy taste good. It tastes good. There's dissol dissolve.
And last night I was looking up because it hit
literally within like five minutes, so like if you look
at my like, I know.
Speaker 1 (25:26):
Because I was falling asleep laughing to flap Jack and then.
Speaker 2 (25:31):
Like I was in bed like dead asleep. I was
like like and he just goes through and I just
heard no.
Speaker 3 (25:40):
Idea you're watching still, and I was like, I'm.
Speaker 1 (25:43):
Sorry, to be fair, I was half asleep, and I've
been doing that a lot, like I keep because I've
been sleeping so early, Like I go in and out
of like waves of sleep as I'm falling asleep because
my body is like, no, it's too early to go
to sleep.
Speaker 3 (25:56):
Check the camera. Yeah, but sorry to keep going in you.
Speaker 2 (26:05):
All day. I've wanted to trip Kih so badly.
Speaker 3 (26:08):
I know you just are so mean to him, But
it's like it's like a way of flirting, I think,
because someone in my life right now is so diabolically
rude to me, like literally just like will randomly just
call me ugly and I can't tell if he's being
serious or not. But I truly, truly, truly like got
to the bottom of it, and I think he wants
to have sex with me and he knows I won't.
(26:29):
I would literally never.
Speaker 2 (26:31):
Oh see.
Speaker 1 (26:31):
But I'm not that kind of bully, Like I'm not
commenting on people's looks in a negative way in terms
of like I don't call you ugly, do I?
Speaker 3 (26:39):
I just like, also, I just need to make it clear.
I threw some of this leaf on the ground. Probably
shouldn't have done that. I don't pick it up. I
just feel bad.
Speaker 4 (26:54):
And he said she wanted to rip out my eyelashes.
Speaker 3 (26:57):
Also, not you and NYA texting every single night before bad.
Speaker 4 (27:02):
I don't think it's been every night, No, six out
of the seven nights of the week.
Speaker 3 (27:07):
Probably six seven.
Speaker 4 (27:09):
But I'm so drunk, I don't even remember when I
saw it. I at this point, I'm getting hammered every
night basically, so I don't know what I'm saying. So
if it's incoherent, that's probably why. And I start early.
I start right when I wake two pm. You wake
up at two pm. No, I'm waking up at around
seven am.
Speaker 1 (27:28):
Because that's why you haven't been able to drive on
the whole trip, because you're just like drunk all the time.
Speaker 4 (27:31):
Yes, And I don't want you guys to judge me.
Speaker 2 (27:35):
Yeah, well we are judging you. Yeah that's really odd.
That's like fucked up, it's weird.
Speaker 4 (27:39):
All right. Well, it's my medicine, so I don't know.
Speaker 3 (27:41):
He literally can't live without it. I mean, yeah, I'm
not judging you. I'm judging you what you're drinking. I
literally started shaking if I don't eat box. It's crazy
and I need to fix and I need to fix
right now.
Speaker 4 (28:01):
Oh my god, I can't stop cold turkey.
Speaker 3 (28:03):
You have to wean off.
Speaker 4 (28:04):
You have to wean off.
Speaker 2 (28:06):
Yeah, I think, Drew. Can you start watching YouTube videos
of how to give heads? Like since we're already because
we're gonna just have to get married.
Speaker 3 (28:14):
Yeah, I know, and at.
Speaker 2 (28:15):
One point you will have to start sexually pleasing me.
Speaker 3 (28:17):
But if we marry, I get to pick where we live.
Speaker 2 (28:21):
Says, who the fuck? When? Why? And how?
Speaker 3 (28:24):
Mean it's marrying you, then we're moving to the Silver
Lake Reservoir.
Speaker 1 (28:32):
That's not marriage. That's fucking torture. That's literally fucking torture.
Speaker 3 (28:36):
No where would where would we live?
Speaker 1 (28:39):
I want to live like upstate or in the woods
upstate New York.
Speaker 3 (28:43):
No, app you would want to live upstate California?
Speaker 2 (28:48):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (28:49):
What about upstate Texas? And we live in like the desert?
Speaker 2 (28:54):
You want me to kill myself?
Speaker 3 (28:55):
Yes, yeah, you're trying to be free.
Speaker 2 (28:58):
Yeah, you're trying to isolate me.
Speaker 3 (29:00):
The dust Bowl was real, Like I have theories that
it wasn't real or it wasn't as big as it was. Jell,
learn about the dust bol Yeah it was. It was
legitimately like a huge like section of history class, Like
we learned about the dust bowl for like months. Yeah,
it happened all over like the Midwest. It was like
(29:21):
the crops like sucked up all the nutrients from the
soil and like made it super loose and like wind
would fucking blow and like it just would make giant
plumes of dust. But like the way they were saying
it happened like legitimately made it sound like it was
like apocalyptic and like millions and millions and millions of
people died and were like affected in shit. But I'm like, girl,
(29:45):
like it's not that deep. I have dust in my house.
Speaker 2 (29:50):
Dust actually might be that much.
Speaker 4 (29:52):
No, it was.
Speaker 3 (29:52):
It was like bad dust. It was like dust with glass.
Speaker 1 (29:55):
And it also not only that, like inhaling dust me
with a vape in my hand, and I smoked so
much every day, Like I'm inhaling so much stuff.
Speaker 2 (30:02):
Also, that is the other thing is like we.
Speaker 1 (30:04):
We don't live in a good place.
Speaker 3 (30:07):
In terms of the modern day version of that is
the break dust and a babe, the break dust. Yeah,
all of these fucking cars, like the breaks when they
get worn down and it just makes like microscopic flakes
of dust. And that's like.
Speaker 1 (30:22):
I've been all over I've been coming to this like
theory and it really isn't me trying to be anti
like doctors and science, because I do. I am pro
health and all these things. But when I hear your shit.
Speaker 5 (30:35):
Pro living, pro sliving, Yeah, what is that?
Speaker 4 (30:41):
Haltan said, She's trying to make the words living happen,
and Drew's friend said something was like pro sliving or
pro s life.
Speaker 3 (30:50):
Pro s life. He's pro living, pro s living, but
what was gonna say? I forgot, I'm not buying the
dust bawl oh, I I.
Speaker 1 (31:02):
Just you talking about that makes me think about how
like street cats and like street dogs live for so long.
Speaker 2 (31:08):
And I sometimes have that theory with my own mind
and body. I'm like, like, if you.
Speaker 1 (31:13):
Give yourself too good of care, then your body will
expect it. Like in my head, cats who were overly
like feed like to me, like and God forbid, because
of something actually happened, I would die like I overcare
for a zool.
Speaker 2 (31:27):
And sometimes I'm like, oh my God, in a weird way,
this is gonna.
Speaker 3 (31:30):
Be like cal almost escaped. I know my soul almost
escaped escaped a couple of days ago. So, like Josh
was like cleaning his room and he had like a
giant bag of garbage and he put like half full
cups of coffee in the trash bag. And like, I
can't blame him for that because I do the same
shit sometimes with like sotop, but I or he was
(31:55):
like carrying the bag of garbage out and he was
going on our back door and he noticed that the
coffee was leaking all over the floor, so he like
ran out the door and ran to the trash bag
or trash cans and left the door open. And we
have a very strict rule in our house because we
have trauma from Azula escaping twice, that all doors must
be shut behind you. And we are so neurotic about it.
Speaker 1 (32:14):
Yeah it's bad, like I'll be falling asleep and even it's.
Speaker 2 (32:19):
Myself a door is open or like a windows.
Speaker 3 (32:21):
You literally did do that, yeah, I did. Like you
literally were like the doors open, and I was like, no,
it's not I just walked by it. You're okay, But uh,
Josh left the door open and a Zul like wandered
into the backyard and was just like standing out there
smelling the air, which is like really dangerous because now
he has a taste for it and he knows he
(32:42):
can go back there. But Josh just like put his
arms out and.
Speaker 1 (32:45):
Like Joe, Josh looked like he was about to have
a fucking heart attack.
Speaker 3 (32:49):
He was literally literally like, oh.
Speaker 1 (32:51):
My god, Oh my god, that was so scary, because
I guess, yeah, to be the one to let a
zul out would be so gnarly.
Speaker 2 (32:57):
Also, me asking i's a door was closed.
Speaker 1 (33:00):
Half asleep just reminded me that I texted Kai the
other day this picture of Quentin Tarantino at a fortnite event.
Speaker 2 (33:09):
Oh wait, where the fuck is this? I texted him
this and I was like, what are your thoughts on it?
Speaker 1 (33:17):
And then I don't know why, I was like falling
asleep because I've been falling asleep so early.
Speaker 2 (33:21):
So I was like knocking out as I was texting
about it, and.
Speaker 1 (33:26):
Oh, Kai goes, I'm so excited, it's right by my house,
whole new chapter at Rocks, but only with people.
Speaker 2 (33:33):
And then half asleep.
Speaker 1 (33:34):
I literally Lisa and audio message I haven't really listened to,
but I thought he was saying that like Quinton Tarantino
was at a Fortnite event that you can play it
in person with other people.
Speaker 2 (33:47):
So I was imagining, like, one.
Speaker 1 (33:50):
Why has Kai gone to like an in real life
laser tag a Fortnite and hasn't mentioned it?
Speaker 2 (33:55):
And two why was quick?
Speaker 1 (33:57):
No?
Speaker 2 (33:58):
I would want to go too.
Speaker 1 (33:58):
But I'm saying, not mentioning, it is fucked up because like,
that's what I'm saying. And if I found out that
that was a thing and you had gone without us,
what I would do in retaliation is set up for
us to go but get an even better group of
people and have the best time ever. Talk to you
about it, so that you would have this good memory,
but then you would always like we'd.
Speaker 2 (34:19):
Have a connective memory in a sense.
Speaker 1 (34:21):
Yeah, but you're just you're the only one out of
our memory. So then it's like you were there with us,
but you didn't exist or we just didn't remember you
being there.
Speaker 4 (34:29):
Yeah. I would be happy for you guys, though, because
I'm like, if they're having a good time, even if
I'm not there, that's what I want. It's just for
you guys to be happy.
Speaker 3 (34:37):
I don't want that for you though. Thank you for
having that for me.
Speaker 2 (34:40):
Yeah, I'm glad someone out there have fun without me.
Speaker 5 (34:42):
Yeah, okay, well it is literally possible, not with just you.
Speaker 3 (34:50):
Every single bitch, Like if you're having fun without me,
like you're dead to me.
Speaker 1 (34:57):
I hate people having fun his friends, his close friends
having fun about him. I'm like, yeah, that without it's
like little SI. Yeah, because I was the older sibling
audio message. Oh it was me explaining, but I don't know.
I just remember I was laughing really hard.
Speaker 3 (35:18):
Literally I saw someone say to that picture.
Speaker 1 (35:21):
But then I saw that I just I essentially texted
you while I it literally is just me explained that
I was like half asleep, but I'm not kidding. I
was crying, laughing before I went to bed because in
my head, I like, I like literally fell asleep. I
remember I was watching Jinks. I had fallen asleep in
the middle of that conversation.
Speaker 2 (35:41):
I woke up and I texted.
Speaker 1 (35:42):
Back, Oh wait, what was making me laugh was the
way I fucking asked him about what it was.
Speaker 3 (35:48):
I saw someone respond to that picture saying, why does
he always pose like he's fine? And like, and then
I saw like a few pictures and like it really
does give like.
Speaker 2 (36:00):
He does he's.
Speaker 3 (36:03):
That he feels he's no, no, let me finish, he's sexy,
not physically, but with what he creates.
Speaker 2 (36:10):
I didn't even go that far.
Speaker 3 (36:12):
I love his movies, but I'm I'm a straight white guy. Like,
of course, I'm gonna love his movies. It is made
for you, like straight, like Tarantino made movies for straight guys.
Why do you keep repeating at well, be repeating what.
Speaker 2 (36:26):
It's like an affirmation and like manifesting them.
Speaker 4 (36:28):
Also, why would you bring up your sexuality do the movies?
Speaker 1 (36:33):
Because unless we're talking about like Barbie and the other one.
Speaker 3 (36:37):
Guys, I'm done. I'm done with living this lie. I'm
done living this lie. I'm gay. The way I wrote
that out rolling my eyes, fuck you, I was half asleep.
This is a problem I have when people I read
(36:59):
the wrong one. Every time, I'm like, it's fun.
Speaker 2 (37:04):
What did you mean? What is this place you've been?
Speaker 1 (37:08):
That's what made me laugh because I meant that so
genuinely because I was actually like, in my head, I
had fallen asleep and I think I fully imagine that place,
and I was like, damn, I want to go there.
Speaker 2 (37:16):
And I was like, what the that's just a place,
but I'm gonna I think I'm gonna steal Fortnite.
Speaker 1 (37:21):
I p and rent and like warehouse and do the
Willy Wonka chocolate factory thing, but with Fortnite, I p
and have a laser tag warehouse with like cutouts that
you get from Party City video.
Speaker 2 (37:37):
He has a parking Dubai.
Speaker 3 (37:41):
Oh yeah, and it's like that's real. It's scary. I
thought that was like that was straight up built by
slave labor, and I don't people talking about I don't.
Speaker 4 (37:49):
I thought it. I thought it was fake, but it
could be real. No, It's like.
Speaker 3 (37:55):
I cannot believe it, and like it popped up seemingly overnight,
and I'm like where we're to. Yeah, anything built in
Dubai overnight?
Speaker 2 (38:08):
Dubai period.
Speaker 4 (38:10):
Have you told them about your the set that you're
doing for the Odd Comedy Festival?
Speaker 3 (38:15):
No, I haven't yet. Guys, you're opening liner. I am
opening and headlining the Odd Comedy.
Speaker 2 (38:23):
Festival and we're so excited. Drew is the face of Dubai.
Speaker 3 (38:27):
I got paid one point two million dollars for a
thirty minute set and then three point eight for my
closing set.
Speaker 2 (38:36):
Oh my god, you got paid twice for the same
a million.
Speaker 1 (38:39):
That's crazy, that's kind of cheap because I heard they
paid a Z's twelve.
Speaker 3 (38:44):
But he's a ease, That's what I'm saying.
Speaker 4 (38:47):
I'm doing it for ak.
Speaker 5 (38:48):
So so you're just a bad person, Yeah, just a
piece of shit.
Speaker 2 (38:53):
Yeah, you just like want to be a part of it.
Speaker 4 (38:56):
I'm losing money on this tour.
Speaker 3 (38:58):
I'm losing my first class flight him their twelve thousand
dollars Quantis alone.
Speaker 2 (39:03):
To fly what's that one?
Speaker 3 (39:05):
Emirates Quantis are Emirates O the gold one. Yeah, he's
in the gold little pile.
Speaker 1 (39:10):
Oh my god, mister Bees was low key predictive programming
us to fuck with Dubai because he took that flight.
Speaker 3 (39:18):
There, Casey Nice, that too?
Speaker 2 (39:20):
Is Casey Nice? That fucking with that too?
Speaker 3 (39:21):
That's like Casey Nice Had's biggest video of all time
I think because him reviewing like the ten million fucking
there is dollar room. Oh well, guys, so you know
how I've been like doing my little DJ thing. Yeah, okay, Well,
(39:42):
we went to the Ropping concert, which I will get
into in a second. It was so much fucking fun.
But as we were walking by the front to go
into the Acne Studios line, someone walks by and says, hey,
look it's the DJs. Y'all were great. So I'm like
known as a fucking DJ now, Oh my gosh, yeah
(40:03):
it was. It was incredible, and then it was incredible.
And then I saw him at the Robin after party
at Honey's and he was couldn't take his eyes off
of us.
Speaker 2 (40:18):
Do you think he wants a hit?
Speaker 3 (40:19):
I mean maybe maybe would you would you let him
hit if he got you a good if you got
me a good set, yeah, you would let him hit. Yeah,
but I mean he was literally asking if, like for
my name so we could go DJ like he was like,
who were the DJs? They were great? And then we
saw him in person at the Robin concert.
Speaker 1 (40:40):
Yeah that's what they're gonna say about me when I
started DJing. I'm DJing my first thing tonight, so it's like,
no big deal, it's huge.
Speaker 3 (40:49):
I'm off the DJ bed with MC pillow at Club Blanket.
Speaker 2 (40:59):
I can't believe Michael Jackson held his baby blanket out.
Speaker 3 (41:03):
Babbio Jackson, y'all, we really need to talk about Jackson.
You are not jack No, I have been.
Speaker 2 (41:08):
Like Fabio Jackson is Michael Jackson.
Speaker 3 (41:12):
Oh I am like I think he's reincarnated, but no,
I'm so in deep into the Fabio Jackson Laura. And
then on top of that, I am now in deep
in the Rico MJ lore. Rico MJ is oh Rico
MJ is the one that slid across the dance floor.
Speaker 2 (41:29):
Like he's mad about the movie too.
Speaker 3 (41:31):
No, that's his like go to move, Like look, he
just does it all the time. So like the greatest
greatest video of all time. Hey, what's up? This is
Rico Michael Jackson tribute artist.
Speaker 1 (41:46):
So I've been seeing a lot of.
Speaker 3 (41:47):
People online trying to perfect perfect my reco MJ slide,
but like no, so like that's his fucking thing?
Speaker 2 (41:57):
Why does he What does he mean? People are trying
going to perfect his slide.
Speaker 3 (42:03):
It's like not even his. It's like Michael Jackson slove money.
Speaker 2 (42:07):
It's not even Michael Jackson's.
Speaker 1 (42:08):
The act of throwing your human body across the floor
like that.
Speaker 3 (42:12):
It's kind of like I saw, like, oh, what was it?
It was like Discord Daughter or like Scare actor Slider Son,
And I was like, I'm taking the Discord Daughter, but
like Scare actor Slider son, like, you know that archetype
of person.
Speaker 1 (42:29):
Dude, I would fucking hate to have a son who
was a scare actor.
Speaker 2 (42:33):
I would hate that. I'm sorry, as fucked you were.
Speaker 3 (42:40):
You were a bad person in a past life. You
committed crimes, hainous acts. I'm saying, if you have a
scare actor.
Speaker 1 (42:46):
Yeah, my son is a scared Well, if I have
a son, I think it'll be a.
Speaker 3 (42:49):
P Also on the same tip, on the same tip,
I'm like, I would be proud of my son no
matter what. One time, my dad looked at me in
the face and was like, I'm true, you know that,
Like I'll love you no matter what, no matter who
you want to be. It was so movie coded, and
he was talking about me being gay.
Speaker 1 (43:08):
Well, my mom, I was updating her on my romantic
life on the phone and then she goes.
Speaker 2 (43:15):
I forgot what I was saying. I was saying something,
and then she was.
Speaker 1 (43:18):
Like, yeah, because you like girls, but you like boys too, right,
Like you like boys too, rite you still there's still
a part of you that like you would like a boy,
you would still like be with boy.
Speaker 2 (43:27):
I was like yeah, and then she's like, oh, and.
Speaker 3 (43:29):
It's like, but boys too.
Speaker 2 (43:30):
Yeah, boys right, boys, but boys too.
Speaker 1 (43:33):
But honestly, trying to speak to my mom about anything
emotionally dense is so difficult, and it feels like if
somebody took acid and then got on duel lingo, Like
that is what's speaking to my mom in Spanish about
anything further than like anything about my personal life.
Speaker 3 (43:50):
Because I al such just or blinked with one eye.
It wasn't a wing.
Speaker 2 (43:54):
I'm a lizard.
Speaker 3 (43:55):
My mom can blink one eye at a time, like
she can do that like weird shit. Yeah, but like
it looks like not like squinting. Damn I forgot Oh
wait insert the video insert it.
Speaker 6 (44:11):
None Nope, none one as there is none and I suck.
Speaker 3 (44:20):
Damn I forgot.
Speaker 2 (44:23):
Two. Why isn't there surgery to make you sing better?
I'm not kidding, Like they have surgery for everything.
Speaker 1 (44:29):
You can get taller, you can get shorter, you can
get bigger boobs, smaller boobs, big butt, no, but more
thigh less thigh, But like, is there nothing they can
do to make you sing good?
Speaker 3 (44:39):
Because I mean, I have like vocal nodes surgery, but.
Speaker 1 (44:42):
Isn't that for like when you just get nodes on
your throat but I'm saying they probably can, like fuck
with your vocal cords or some ship.
Speaker 2 (44:50):
The notes she got taken out?
Speaker 3 (44:52):
I want her notes give? Did she have surgery?
Speaker 1 (44:56):
I'm pretty sure all of like the like top girls,
every top girl gets a node.
Speaker 2 (45:01):
You're not a diva without a note or two?
Speaker 3 (45:04):
Does Sabrina Carpenter haven't note?
Speaker 1 (45:06):
I'm hoping she doesn't, and maybe she could be one
of the revolutionary women.
Speaker 3 (45:10):
It's bad at singing. That's why I'm so bad at singing,
because I have nodes.
Speaker 1 (45:13):
Yeah, we gotta get those rud and then you're gonna
sound like a beautiful, fucking well oiled w You know
what's weird?
Speaker 4 (45:20):
Drew?
Speaker 1 (45:21):
When we get in bed, sometimes he'll roll around and
I have to oil him up with WD forty because
he squeaks. His joints squeak because he's full of what's
that stuff?
Speaker 3 (45:32):
Come?
Speaker 2 (45:32):
Yeah, he's full of come. So the oil like really, like.
Speaker 4 (45:37):
Is that true, Drew? Are you full of com Yes?
Speaker 2 (45:39):
It's kind of like paint thinner the oil the W
D forty, Well.
Speaker 3 (45:42):
I am like, what is it called? No fat vibes?
Speaker 4 (45:47):
Yeah? No fat vibes?
Speaker 2 (45:48):
Yeah, have no fat, no fat no nut November.
Speaker 1 (45:51):
That's all the things talking about, like a real recession indicators.
Speaker 2 (45:55):
Nobody is doing no nut nov going from.
Speaker 3 (46:00):
That we have going from October to no not November
is like really crazy for mon is locked. It's like
chastity belt shit, is.
Speaker 2 (46:11):
That actually a thing?
Speaker 1 (46:12):
Yeah, I've been looking at chastity belts, and per usual,
women's chastity belts are better than men's chastity belts, just
like with every kind of fashion, women's is always going
to be better.
Speaker 2 (46:21):
Well, the men's.
Speaker 1 (46:22):
Chastity belts penis like the penis part, Like.
Speaker 2 (46:26):
That's fucking disgusting.
Speaker 1 (46:27):
Like, you know, the whole point of a chassis belt
is it's supposed to be like underwear.
Speaker 2 (46:31):
No, like it's just supposed to be like normal underwear.
Wise you're fucking dingling there, Like that's disgusting.
Speaker 3 (46:35):
Wait, Have I told y'all that there's this tick that
if it bites you, it gives you like a meat allergy. No, yeah,
you get allergic. You get allergic to red meat.
Speaker 2 (46:45):
Has has anybody died from that?
Speaker 3 (46:47):
Well, someone just died from it.
Speaker 1 (46:51):
The amount of times I've been tagged in the meat eating.
Speaker 2 (46:55):
Tick that killed somebody because of fucking.
Speaker 1 (46:57):
DG mentioning it all every fucking episode, every time you
say big things are coming, big things.
Speaker 3 (47:02):
Are earthquake, earthquake weather. It's an earthquake weather, big earthquake coming.
Speaker 1 (47:06):
You say that, You literally say that at any weather,
like any time of the year.
Speaker 2 (47:10):
Drew can walk outside and be like, this's earthquake weather.
That's earthquake weather. Is there.
Speaker 1 (47:16):
Actually, we've talked about this before. There's no such thing
as earthquake weather.
Speaker 3 (47:19):
No, no, what.
Speaker 2 (47:21):
Did you know?
Speaker 1 (47:21):
There's no such thing as tornado weather either. They make tornadoes.
You know, the government is making.
Speaker 3 (47:25):
The tornadoes, right, conspiracy.
Speaker 1 (47:28):
The government's making the tornadoes. They're doing the cloud seating.
Well that's real, I know. But you keep saying there's
a website to track it. But I haven't looked, and
I don't believe you.
Speaker 4 (47:37):
You know, they have Grinder.
Speaker 3 (47:40):
Let's Grinder.
Speaker 4 (47:42):
It's a social media app.
Speaker 2 (47:44):
What's the other one? Sniffies.
Speaker 3 (47:46):
You saying the word Sniffies to me is horrifying.
Speaker 4 (47:49):
Someone dress?
Speaker 3 (47:51):
Yeah, one of my friends dressed up as Sniffyes for Halloween.
Speaker 2 (47:55):
That's amazing. Yeah, well I got banned.
Speaker 3 (47:57):
Should I do some ziops?
Speaker 1 (47:59):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (48:00):
Eyes, I haven't done siof in so long on.
Speaker 2 (48:04):
The curse has been lifted. We're we're in better place.
Speaker 3 (48:07):
We have sig up cornerback, Gay Thought or Sun Daughter.
If you unplug the Wi Fi box for one second,
the whole house start acting like they're gonna die. You'll
see people coming out of rooms you've never seen before.
Speaker 2 (48:27):
That's to get you and Josh out of your rooms.
Speaker 1 (48:29):
You and Josh, You and Josh get the most use
out of your bedrooms out of any adults I've ever met.
Speaker 3 (48:36):
Yeah, it's my sacred safe space. And what about it?
Speaker 2 (48:39):
Well, there's a sacred safe fly playing in your hair
right now. There's literally a fly.
Speaker 3 (48:46):
Kai's breath smell like he hasn't said a word in
three days. Whenever I have buffalo wings, I wipe my
hands on Enya's cat and he starts screaming.
Speaker 2 (49:01):
Oh my god, Azuel.
Speaker 1 (49:02):
I've been painting a lot and a zool keeps coming
up to me to like get pets for me. And
the other day I smeared a bunch of uh orange
like stuff on his head, but you couldn't really tell
because he has the orange spots on his head, so's
no one can tell that I'm poisoning my cat with
oil paint.
Speaker 3 (49:19):
When your boyfriend is having a bad day, ask if
he's mad at you. Follow for more relationship advice.
Speaker 1 (49:29):
I'm not kidding. I actually don't know if I'm meant,
I don't. I already know I'm not in a place
to be in a relationship with the idea of anybody,
let alone a man texting my phone about a bad
day he had actually makes me want to fucking hit somebody, Like,
oh my god, that's like kind of the worst part
about having a partner is having to act like one
you give a fuck about dreams, like you have.
Speaker 3 (49:51):
To Oh my god, I can't believe that happens someone
to act. I never shut the fuck up about my godda.
I'm dreams. My dreams means so much to me. But
like all I dream about now is like me biting
so hard in my sleep that my teeth turned the powder.
Speaker 1 (50:10):
Well, I had a dream all my teeth fell up,
but I just kept pushing, like I literally I was
like talking to y'all at a restaurant or something, and
then my teeth fell out, and I just started spitting
my teeth in my hand and literally throwing on my
god like that, and all of y'all were like, oh
my god, your teeth are falling out, and I was like,
it's hot.
Speaker 4 (50:31):
Oh my god.
Speaker 3 (50:31):
I was going to say something I hate when someone
cars stink. What the fuck you driving with your ass open?
What the fuck are you doing driving with your ass open?
Speaker 2 (50:44):
Oh my god? Fuck? Wait, I'm not kidding.
Speaker 1 (50:45):
I was on such Oh wait, yeah, the worst part
about dating somebody is having to listen to their dream
one and then two having to act like you care
about like their work day that makes sense, Like it
just gets to a point or maybe the you know,
that's just proof I shouldn't be I.
Speaker 2 (51:04):
Just couldn't give. Yeah, I'm not ready, I'm not there.
Speaker 1 (51:07):
I just like I'm not in a place where I
really have any more space to give a single funk
about anybody else. Like my roster in terms of emotional
bandwidth is at like top to even if I met
the baddest boy or girl, I'm girl.
Speaker 3 (51:26):
No, no, no, don't say that, not at dinner over coffee.
Speaker 2 (51:34):
Are you seriously coming out to me while we're having coffee?
Speaker 3 (51:36):
And how is a girl gonna date a girl.
Speaker 2 (51:40):
That doesn't even make sense? How does that work?
Speaker 1 (51:42):
But yeah, I'm down for either, but maybe not right
now because I'm not kidding either one unless you better
have the best days ever.
Speaker 2 (51:49):
Like I don't want to hear about a bad day.
I just don't want to hear any more negative.
Speaker 4 (51:52):
See.
Speaker 3 (51:52):
No, my I'm like the opposite. I'm like, I would
much rather hear about a bad day. Really, yeah, I
just what my partner like suffering?
Speaker 2 (52:02):
Yeah, so that their only point of positivity is you.
Speaker 3 (52:05):
Yeah, and then like, well, like that's the whole thing.
Is like they come to me with their problems and
then I make them laugh and they get addicted to me.
It's like nicotine. I also put just make them laugh.
Well no, I also put nicotine patches on them when
they sleep next to me.
Speaker 1 (52:21):
Well yeah, I actually I got banned from Sniffy's because
I kept meeting up with people and slipping in an
AirPod in their ass. No, and I shouldn't have done that,
and it did get me banns. But I think I
can like do something about.
Speaker 3 (52:34):
You ever made up a fake story and a
Speaker 1 (53:00):
Yah
Popular Podcasts
Hey Jonas!
Hey Jonas! The official Jonas Brothers podcast. Hosted by Kevin, Joe, and Nick Jonas. It’s the Jonas Brothers you know... musicians, actors, and well, yes, brothers. Now, they’re sharing another side of themselves in the playful, intimate, and irreverent way only they can. Spend time with the Jonas Brothers here and stay a little bit longer for deep conversations like never before.
Crime Junkie
Does hearing about a true crime case always leave you scouring the internet for the truth behind the story? Dive into your next mystery with Crime Junkie. Every Monday, join your host Ashley Flowers as she unravels all the details of infamous and underreported true crime cases with her best friend Brit Prawat. From cold cases to missing persons and heroes in our community who seek justice, Crime Junkie is your destination for theories and stories you won’t hear anywhere else. Whether you're a seasoned true crime enthusiast or new to the genre, you'll find yourself on the edge of your seat awaiting a new episode every Monday. If you can never get enough true crime... Congratulations, you’ve found your people. Follow to join a community of Crime Junkies! Crime Junkie is presented by Audiochuck Media Company.
Betrayal Weekly
Betrayal Weekly is back for a new season. Every Thursday, Betrayal Weekly shares first-hand accounts of broken trust, shocking deceptions, and the trail of destruction they leave behind. Hosted by Andrea Gunning, this weekly ongoing series digs into real-life stories of betrayal and the aftermath. From stories of double lives to dark discoveries, these are cautionary tales and accounts of resilience against all odds. From the producers of the critically acclaimed Betrayal series, Betrayal Weekly drops new episodes every Thursday. If you would like to share your story, you can reach out to the Betrayal Team by emailing them at betrayalpod@gmail.com and follow us on Instagram at @betrayalpod and @glasspodcasts. Please join our Substack for additional exclusive content, curated book recommendations, and community discussions. Sign up FREE by clicking this link Beyond Betrayal Substack. Join our community dedicated to truth, resilience, and healing. Your voice matters! Be a part of our Betrayal journey on Substack.