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September 21, 2023 30 mins

Amara opens her heart and shares her personal journey of love, revealing her carefully crafted checklist for an ideal partner.  Join us as Amara takes us on a exploration of the qualities and characteristics she seeks in a life partner. From shared values and passions to the small gestures that make a big difference, she paints a vivid picture of her perfect match.

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Speaker 1 (00:02):
That's right, that's right.

Speaker 2 (00:03):
Welcome to this show, my show.

Speaker 1 (00:07):
I am your girl, Amada la Nigra, and you're listening
to exactly Amada, a production of iHeart. Thank you so
much for tuning in. I'm working on my girls, you know,
Lasworldtwins dot Com, their clothing line.

Speaker 2 (00:18):
I am working on new TV shows.

Speaker 1 (00:21):
I am working on my children's book and my girls
children's book.

Speaker 2 (00:25):
I am doing so many things right now that like,
I am very excited to see where my life goes.

Speaker 1 (00:31):
And I'm also I recently just auditioned for a movie,
Fingers Crossed. If that hits two this year is gonna
be real juicy.

Speaker 2 (00:39):
But with that being said, I still don't have a man.

Speaker 1 (00:44):
I haven't been able to like really find someone like
I think dating it's fine. You know, you meet different people,
you go out, you know, Tonight's dinners, you hang out,
you have someone you know while.

Speaker 2 (00:56):
You're getting to know each other, text you.

Speaker 1 (00:58):
The okay morning and they send you the emojis and
they sayd you, and I love that journey. I'm not
obviously ready because I've already spoken about on the show
to physically give myself like that to anyone yet and
for those that are new listening, you know, I haven't
had sex in a year now, you know, basically since
I had my girls, and I'm okay with that.

Speaker 2 (01:19):
It doesn't bother me.

Speaker 1 (01:19):
I feel like a lot of people are like, oh
my god, you need to like and I'm like, no,
I'm okay. I made myself so busy working. I've been
so caught up raising my daughters. I've been so caught
up doing so many things that I've been fine in
this space.

Speaker 2 (01:32):
But I'm not gonna lie.

Speaker 1 (01:33):
I do miss getting cuddled. I do miss the partnership.
I miss all the build up, you know, before the sex,
because either the sex can make the relationship or it
can tear it apart, like things sometimes can be so
great before it happens and after it happens trash, or
it actually makes you guys, you know, tighter. But it's
been really hard for me to find someone, and I

(01:54):
don't know. I feel like if I talk to Alex,
maybe Alex can help me get it together. And I
want to talk about things to consider really when it
comes to finding the right partner after you become a mother,
you know, especially if you are you know, a single parent,
you know, as a single mom, finding the right person
today has become even more, you know, more difficult.

Speaker 2 (02:17):
And I'm over here reading on social media as we're.

Speaker 1 (02:19):
Talking, how people don't believe I always talk about it,
how people don't believe you know that I had become celibate.
I think that that's okay, and especially now as I am,
you know, pressing reset on my dating life and I'm
in the process of actually trying to find someone that
can be a good partner, a good role model for
my children. All these are the things that is really

(02:43):
important to me. But as a single mom right now,
it gets a little bit difficult. So that's why I
have my friend producer Alex with me today.

Speaker 3 (02:51):
Alee, we're gonna have to make this. You know, it's
been a while since we've we've spoken close to this subject.
You know, we've danced around it. You've given us your
thoughts on finding someone, some things that you like. But
there's something that I understand here is that you're having
a difficult time.

Speaker 1 (03:09):
No finding the right one.

Speaker 3 (03:10):
So I'm going to make this into a dating show
style episode today.

Speaker 1 (03:14):
It's really hard. I've gone on a few dates and
here's my thing, So I have to be honest. One
thing is what people see on reality TV, right, mm hmm.

Speaker 2 (03:25):
One thing is what people see on you know, this
show that I'm in.

Speaker 3 (03:28):
And you've gone viral for.

Speaker 1 (03:30):
Which I've gone viral for, and you know I can't
say that one hundred percent is true, Right, there's a
mix because no matter what it is, you know I
do a TV show that it's an entertainment show, right,
So you have to give enough content for people to
be satisfied. And sometimes you may zoom in and expand

(03:50):
things more than what they really are. But when it
comes to my personal life, I've never been a fan.

Speaker 2 (03:56):
To exposing too many things.

Speaker 1 (03:57):
I made the mistake of exposing my last two, like
serious relationships, and I realized that I shouldn't have because
if I hadn't, maybe those would have worked.

Speaker 2 (04:08):
Because I learned that if you really really love.

Speaker 1 (04:11):
Someone and you really are trying to protect someone and
the person you love, you don't expose them, and you
don't expose all the details of your personal life because
it makes people feel as if they can give opinions
and accuse and point and do all these other things
that you may not realize, but it does.

Speaker 2 (04:28):
Put pressure in your relationship.

Speaker 1 (04:29):
So with that being said, dating has become very difficult
for me now. And I am shy. You know, I
am a little shy. I have a really big personality.
But when it comes to dating or meeting people, if
you don't approach me, I don't really know how Really, Yeah.

Speaker 2 (04:48):
Are you one of those I feel yes, I am
a lady.

Speaker 1 (04:52):
I know like I would be the one to stay
in the corner and give you like the clinklink clink clinkling.
If you don't get it, I will walk all the
way around the club by the bathroom, would come back
around wink wink, and if you don't get it, okay,
I'm gonna sit my hands down.

Speaker 2 (05:05):
That's it.

Speaker 1 (05:06):
Because I feel like if a man really wants you,
he will approach you, he'll comfort you. If you're the
one chasing, you already know is a rap because when
a man wants something, a man's natural nature is to
be a hunter. He likes to hunt, he likes to
feel that he you know, I want this, this is
my prize. If you're the one chasing, mama, you already

(05:27):
know Okay, that's gonna go down the hill.

Speaker 2 (05:29):
That's not gonna work.

Speaker 3 (05:30):
So wow, in a million years, I would have thought
that you would have been like, you know what, there's
my prey. I want him. I'm well, you're gonna.

Speaker 1 (05:37):
Go like that like on riah, I'm like that on
like dating apps, right because I think that's what we
both have to do. But in person, if you're not
giving me that type of energy, I will only approach
you or maybe be almost simbodia if I feel that
there's something there, but if not. I was raised very traditional,
and I even though that I'm from this era and

(05:59):
I'm very much more open minded, I still keep a
little bit of what my mom, you know, taught me.
I wish I would I wish I would have kept
all of it, because then I would have fucked up.
But then me trying to be oh I'm independent, I
can't do it.

Speaker 2 (06:13):
Then I fund it up.

Speaker 3 (06:14):
But they're they are lessons learn.

Speaker 2 (06:17):
They have been lessons.

Speaker 1 (06:19):
But with that being said, now dating has changed for
me because it's like I am a mother. I am
a mother, and before before it was just about me.
Now as first them than me. You know, I need
to update someone or find someone that can be a
good role model for my daughters. Do you like children?
Do you have children? Do you understand that my children

(06:39):
are my priority? Unfortunately, as much as I may like you,
my daughters come first. If you are willing to be
part of this combination, I am down for it, you know,
I am down for it to be us. But I
can't put a man above my children. So if you're
okay with that, cool boom.

Speaker 2 (06:58):
Let's do it.

Speaker 1 (06:58):
And I am very respectful as well. You have children
and we're dating and you have to go pick up
your son for your daughter from school, or you got
to go to a recitalor you. I respect that, you know.
I think that it's very important to understand those boundaries.
Here's another one. My mother. My mother has been my
writer dies since the day she gave birth to me.
And I know that it's hard for a lot of

(07:20):
men to be stuck on La suegra Buy one, get
three free. You have my mom and my daughters, and
that's my humbo. You know, everybody comes, I guess with
their baggage, even though I don't consider them baggage. They're
part of me.

Speaker 2 (07:32):
But that's that, and it's just so much more than
there's my career.

Speaker 1 (07:36):
You know, I am a.

Speaker 2 (07:37):
Successful independent woman. I don't want to be independent anymore.

Speaker 1 (07:41):
Come take care of me. I want to go back
to the old ways where I going to stay home
and raise with children. That's me even though I'm still
a boss. Like I'm a boss and I could be
at home and still.

Speaker 2 (07:51):
Make that money.

Speaker 1 (07:52):
Right, I'm very homebodied, So being home, you know, with
my daughters and doing you know, activit with my girls
while my husband is working and making sure everything's nice,
and you know, doing the vacations.

Speaker 3 (08:05):
On the comfort of life.

Speaker 2 (08:07):
I am down for that part of it.

Speaker 1 (08:09):
You know. At this point in my life, I would
love to not maybe one hundred percent, but I would
love to be able to enjoy that. I have that
as an option.

Speaker 2 (08:16):
But I am a hard working mom.

Speaker 1 (08:18):
You know. I have a lot of responsibilities besides my
daughters and my mom and my father and this person
in my employees, from all my last World Twins Empire.

Speaker 2 (08:27):
All my airbnbs and real estate investments.

Speaker 1 (08:31):
I have all those things. I have many people that
depend on me, like if I don't work, they can't
feed their families, right, So it's a lot of pressure.
I consistently push myself to work one hundred percent, which
sometimes also puts pressure in my relationship because.

Speaker 2 (08:47):
You want to go on a day, you want to
hang out, you want to do this.

Speaker 1 (08:50):
I'm tired at the cansa, Like, there's a lot of
things I need to get together in order to feel
like I could date again.

Speaker 3 (09:04):
And that's where this episode will come in for your mom. Today,
we're gonna consider We're gonna have the top ten things
to consider in finding that right partner for you. I
will be the dating host, you know, like those game shows. Yeah,
the host comes out and you're looking for for the
right person. And we have written down a couple of
things here that we think are very important.

Speaker 2 (09:24):
And here's another thing.

Speaker 1 (09:25):
Because I'm also reading here while we're talking, people are like,
you know, well then don't did and this and that?
But and I and here comes the sex part again.
Everybody's over there asking. But I'm like, how important is
sex when you're dating someone?

Speaker 2 (09:39):
And here's why I believe that.

Speaker 1 (09:43):
Back in the days, I loved when men had to
you know, they would wish and dream of the day
that they got to pop kiss you in front of
the door before leaving you at your house. You know,
I love the handwritten letters and I know it's kind
of Warny. I love the little notes, just remember a
little notice sticking to my car, dumb stuff, you know.
I love all those things. The build up is the

(10:04):
beautiful part of me. I feel like, just the the
eagerness of like okay, I'll let you put your hand
in my thigh just a little bit like, oh no,
that's too much.

Speaker 2 (10:11):
Just I like the chase. I like all that.

Speaker 1 (10:14):
I just feel like these days and I respect all
the people that just go ahead and they're free and
they and they accept their sexuality and they do them
and that's fine.

Speaker 2 (10:22):
I'm not judging you.

Speaker 1 (10:22):
I'm just talking about my personal experience.

Speaker 2 (10:25):
The chase is gone, chase me going. That part is gone.

Speaker 1 (10:29):
And that was the good part that like tarn I
can't wait to see her tomorrow, like damn it, you know,
or send me a sexy picture, just a little cute
build up to it. Now it's more like boom, I smashed.
By the way, what's your name? No, I want to
build it, especially now where I am in my life.
I can't just be fucking around and giving my ass

(10:49):
to everyone like it's just for you know.

Speaker 2 (10:52):
No, not to mention that. By the way, if you
want to date me.

Speaker 1 (10:55):
First thing you have to do is send this NDA.
I don't play no games like that. Every man that
dates me, after you know the father of my children,
you have to sign an NDA.

Speaker 2 (11:04):
I do not trust nobody no more.

Speaker 1 (11:07):
You know, I don't trust that you can take pictures, videos,
lead conversations nothing. I will sue you for every penny
you have because you've got to hit them where it hurts,
and it's in their pockets. So, oh, do I have
problems or what?

Speaker 3 (11:22):
No, you are fine. No, you've already you've already taken
a lot of it out.

Speaker 2 (11:27):
Let's go one by one for those that didn't get it.

Speaker 3 (11:29):
So, ladies and gentlemen, we're gonna elaborate a little bit
of this. You already did. Someone who is accepting and
supported over with children. That's something that's the number one
thing you have on your list, and you already spoke
about it, so that's very very important. I see that
you also want someone who is responsible and reliable, which
is something you already talked about, because you yourself have
a lot of responsible and people.

Speaker 1 (11:49):
Really, somebody who's responsible and reliable and be responsible also
means paying these bills.

Speaker 2 (11:55):
Don't pay me, come can't you pay my bills? Can't
you pay them a telephone bill? No, then you're out here.

Speaker 1 (12:01):
I'm not expecting you to maintain you one hundred percent,
but that's part of the responsibility. You can't think that
you're gonna come here and eat my cookie up and
stretch me out and then you're going to go somewhere. No, no,
no no no. If you're if you want to be
with me, you have to understand I also have responsibilities,
and now I'm going to take away from my responsibilities
and time to cater to you, right and to give

(12:22):
you my toat and my time and my nursery and
my wisdom. Suh.

Speaker 2 (12:29):
We have to compromise.

Speaker 3 (12:30):
Next, someone who has similar values and priorities as you, Boom.
I mean that one is a must because you are
involved in a lot of businesses. You have a very
entrepreneur mindset, so you would definitely want someone who has
thus high priorities.

Speaker 1 (12:49):
As you want to come high priorities, similar values. I
agree one hundred percent. A man who has a bad
relationship with his mother, red black, red flag. When a
man doesn't care about his mother, when he is like,
oh screw her, this and that or I don't care
to pay attention. She gave birth to him, she raised him,
she fed him every single day of his life. She
taught him how to walk, she cleaned his diapers, she

(13:11):
put on his uniform to go. She did. She gave
so much of her life to this person, and he
treats her that way. No, So that's an automatic moving
forward now that I know better canceled. So to me,
it is like someone that has good family values is
important to me. Someone who understands, you know, loyalty and respect.
And when I mean loyalty and respect, I mean if

(13:32):
you respect me enough, you won't purposely hurt me, you
won't do things that is gonna disrespect me, and you know,
damage our relationship or what we're building. So there's many
things to it, and as far as priorities as well.
I'm a very ambitious person. I'm gonna go get her.
I'm driven. I could be tired as hell and I'll
still get my ass up to accomplash the mission.

Speaker 2 (13:52):
So you can be lazy.

Speaker 1 (13:55):
I like a man that I can admire, like when
I'm tired, I see begas his ass.

Speaker 2 (14:00):
I can't let him down.

Speaker 1 (14:01):
I can't be a bad like I got to be
an example, a mirror of my husband or of the
person that I'm dating. I have a very strong personality
and a very strong character. I don't want to lead
my man. I can for certain situations, but in order
for a man to be able to be a good leader,

(14:22):
he needs to be emotionally stable. He needs to know
how to be coheartened when he has to know emotionally
like detached this, I care about this, But the right
move to do is this, and this is how we're
gonna move for X and why reasons like if I
feel that I am the man that I can do
up and what the hell do I need you?

Speaker 2 (14:41):
I want to need you. I want to so being
able to be especially.

Speaker 1 (14:45):
Women women, we can be very hormonal right in many occasions,
and we need somebody that can stabilize us. Right, we're
all over the place. Oh he bring it down, bring
it together. So, yes, you definitely want to be able
to have a man that can emotionally be you know,
stable and be there for you.

Speaker 2 (15:04):
Sure.

Speaker 3 (15:04):
And I don't agree or disagree with the hormonal COmON
because I don't want anyone coming after me. The next
one that I have is well, this is a big
one for you because you've also spoken about it. Someone
who has a good relationship with their own family, like
you just mentioned the mom deal, that's big because the
way that they treat those that they're supposed to love
tell us a lot about how they're going to treat you.

Speaker 1 (15:25):
Yeah for sure, Yeah, yeah, you have to have good
family values and I never really cared about that, so
my last real relationship. And if they don't have a
good relationship with their family, not just their mother, you
can't expect to create this beautiful, you know, home, this
beautiful family with them because they don't understand the meaning
of it. And at the same time, they have to

(15:46):
want it. And I'm going to say this, I was
raised by a single mother. I never knew what it
was to have a family. That's why I want to
have a family. I am eager to have a family.
I protect the aspect of having a family because I've
never had and I want it. So if you find
someone that you're dating, in my case, I want to
find someone who wants a home.

Speaker 2 (16:06):
Who wants a family, who wants to build together. Not
every man wants that.

Speaker 1 (16:12):
And by the way, women, when a man tells you
what he wants, can you pay attention and listen, stop
trying to.

Speaker 2 (16:19):
They get in there. That's what he's saying.

Speaker 1 (16:21):
He said what he said, and he meant it. If
he said I just want to have a good time,
I'm just vibing. I'm just chilling. I'm just figuring it out,
you know, I'm just going with the flow. He said
what he said because a man knows how to be intentional.
If he says, I am looking to settle down, I
am looking for a relationship, I am looking for a wife,

(16:43):
I'm looking to get married, I'm looking whatever it is.
When he says what it is, pay attention, listen.

Speaker 3 (16:49):
The next one, here's someone who is open to communication
and compromise. Another big one, like all these are hitting
exactly what you want. I love it you are and
what you want communication and compromise. What do you think
about that?

Speaker 2 (17:01):
Communication is key?

Speaker 1 (17:03):
You know what, before I blame myself, I don't think
that I was very good at communicating because I am
a liber and part of being a Libra or just
my personality over all, I'm very pleasing. I like to please.
I want you to be happy with me. I think
that also comes from daddy issues. I want to be accepted,
so I am always looking to do things that can

(17:24):
make you happy. That sometimes means putting my own feelings
in the back burner and not explaining or communicating how
I feel about things, and not communicating being quiet makes
me frustrated, and getting frustrated then makes me angry, And
then it's like, it's not his fault that you're angry
because you didn't tell him what you wanted because you
don't want to make him feel bad. Maybe if you

(17:46):
would have said it, he wasn't gonna feel bad. He
would have been like, oh okay. But because sometimes as
women overthink too much, we get ourselves all worked up
for nothing. So moving forward, at this point, at this
place my life, I am willing to communicate better and
say exactly what I want, what I feel, be very

(18:09):
upfront with Sometimes being a front s can be, you know,
a little bit like you're doing too much, But I
think that that's important. I think it's important to communicate
properly on both sides, and I want somebody.

Speaker 2 (18:19):
Who also can do the same nicely.

Speaker 1 (18:21):
I think that it's all about the delivery, no matter
what you have to say, don't disrespect me or talk
to me funny in front of the people. Wait till
we get in the car, wait till we get to
the house, and you can be like Mina, I don't
like when you do this, da da da, or can you.

Speaker 2 (18:34):
Do it this way? I think it's all about the delivery, Alex,
how do you do it? Don't you think that's a way?
Like maybe I don't. How do you tell your significant other?

Speaker 3 (18:50):
I think it's just a simple you know. And sometimes
guys think that maybe they're not heard or maybe they're
asking too much. But if I think exactly what you said,
I believe communicating what you want without making it seem
like you know, you're whining or blaming whining. Yeah, yeah,

(19:10):
like you're not. You're not. You just told me. Make
sure you tell me what is that you're like what
you want, because that is a way for both of
us to compromise, communicate and talk situation that might be happening.
Another one here is someone who is stable and again
you just mentioned this with a job or a career.
They don't have to have a nine to five, right,
but they have to have some type of drive correct, No.

Speaker 2 (19:32):
No, no, no, no, no. Ladies don't do it so you
do as you please.

Speaker 1 (19:41):
For my girlfriends, I'm gonna be like, listen, at this
point in your life, it depends where you're at. If
you are you know, you're young, and you feel like
you're still on experiment and explore and do those things.

Speaker 2 (19:50):
That's fine once you pass your thirties.

Speaker 1 (19:53):
Once you get to the thirties, the thirty fives, the
forty forty five, and you don't get time to be
playing around. You need to know exactly what you want,
how you want it, and this is what it is. Yeah,
So financially, if you're not there, I don't think you
should be dating.

Speaker 2 (20:09):
That's me.

Speaker 1 (20:10):
I think that you need to be focusing all your
energy and becoming the best version of you, focusing on
you because you know that if you date someone, especially
a woman, a heypmence or depends. You know, men, I
think that they know how far they can go. Right
if you know that, you like, you see a woman
that's walking Lubaton Gucci.

Speaker 2 (20:27):
This is that product, all type the crazy.

Speaker 1 (20:28):
So she's eating all bougie on her social media and
lobster every day. Please know that she may be cool
enough to go have McDonald's with you one day, but
you know the standard. Do you believe in that that
financially men and women need to know what type of
people to date or No.

Speaker 3 (20:45):
I've never really looked at it that way. I mean
I don't. I've always been either the person who has
made a lot more and I've been in situations where
I definitely have not, and I still bring something to
the But I think.

Speaker 2 (20:56):
That social media also messes that up.

Speaker 1 (20:58):
And that's why I'm saying it because I see a
lot of women that are like, whether it's sure or not,
you sell this lifestyle that you live right and you
want today men that can give you this lifestyle, And
you see these men working their ass off to provide
things that they know they can't afford, to try to
have a woman that they know they can't afford. Sometimes

(21:19):
you could just have your you know, average girl that's
a really good woman, and financially, you.

Speaker 2 (21:24):
Guys make sense together.

Speaker 1 (21:26):
But today someone that she's fine as hell with a
birken bag traveling on a private jet. You know, you
know your budget does not hate that, So why are
you even entertaining it?

Speaker 2 (21:39):
Does that make sense?

Speaker 1 (21:40):
Oh?

Speaker 4 (21:41):
Yeah, I've seen yes, But I've seen the guys I've
seen the guys spend their last time on women that
do not deserve it because they're only there to take
from you, right, And you know that she don't love it,
You know that there's no future there, but you're so
caught up wanting to this fantasy.

Speaker 1 (21:59):
Wake up, right, And then I'm saying it for me
because I've been I've liked men, and I've been with
men that financially didn't have it like that, and I
just like who they were, whether because I was physically
attracted or the way that they treated me. But at
the long run, it never works out. And it's sorry
to say that, but that's the world that we live
in its reality. Because if I can do for myself

(22:20):
and you can't do for me in any shape, way
or form, at some point, maybe not at the beginning,
maybe not a year, two years from maybe three years whatever,
at some point you're going to start to feel the
weight of you.

Speaker 3 (22:32):
Know, yeah, crushing you, shifting all that.

Speaker 2 (22:35):
Good shifting is shifting.

Speaker 1 (22:36):
Yep.

Speaker 3 (22:37):
Yeah, we're almost done here. The next one that I
have here is someone who is willing to take things
slow and get to know you and your children. Right,
that's I'm assuming that's extremely important to you, because you
know what I'm jumping in here just for no apparent reason,
try to use you. You This is we're talking about
stable relationship here people you know the right partner, and

(22:59):
I believe that that's something extremely important for you that
you have mentioned in the past.

Speaker 1 (23:03):
Yeah, for sure, I definitely moving forward in my life.
And I've been very honest, I've been very vocal, I've
been very blunt. I think that the biggest blessing in
my life was the father of my children. And I'm
going to say it because one he gave me my daughters,
but he also taught me so many lessons in so

(23:25):
little time, and I became a different person after him.

Speaker 2 (23:28):
I learned many things.

Speaker 1 (23:31):
I suffered a lot, but those tears became wisdom and
I am grateful for them because moving forward, I know
now not to move so fast. You know, you can't
let small little things it blind you from reality.

Speaker 2 (23:47):
Take your time. What's the rush?

Speaker 1 (23:50):
And I know that there is some rush because time, relationship,
you're getting older. I get those things. But if you
want to build a mansion, you need a solid foundation, right,
really strong foundation, and you build that with time, getting
to know each other.

Speaker 2 (24:04):
I want to see you at your worst moment.

Speaker 1 (24:06):
How do you act when you're angry? How do you
act when you're broke? How do you act when you're happy.
I want to see if you were to have a
lot of money, you're going to gamble. I want to
see all the aspects of you before I can say
you and I are a thing.

Speaker 2 (24:21):
You and I are getting to know each other.

Speaker 1 (24:23):
We're gonna date for a really long time, so I
feel like, okay, I feel strongly enough to say that
you and I are partners in life. But in the meantime,
let's just.

Speaker 3 (24:34):
Date and hopefully once you get to that safe point
that you think it's the right time to introduce them
to your children, that they are also take it slow there,
because you know it's something that you have to gradually,
you know, bring bring into not only their life. You
got to, you know, make sure that they're ready for
that too. Once that time you feel inside that time is.

Speaker 1 (24:56):
My girls are little right now, and you know, I
feel like they don't know no different, they don't know
no better. But eventually, I'm not dating or bringing anybody
into my house like that either, And I'm very respectful
of that because my mother was very very respectful me
ever seeing her with different men or moving that way.

Speaker 2 (25:13):
So I won't do that with my daughters. However, I
do want.

Speaker 1 (25:16):
To do the right thing, which is to take my
time find the right partner before I decide to present them.
I don't want them to I don't want them to
go your way, you know, start liking this person and
the next thing you know, they're gone, and then someone new,
and then they're gone. I don't want to mess up
my girls, and I don't want them to see me

(25:36):
in a different light.

Speaker 2 (25:38):
So I will be respect that.

Speaker 3 (25:40):
Yeah, and this one ties in with the last one.
Someone who is willing to be obviously flexible and accommodating
with your schedule, not only as a single parent, but
as an entrepreneur and someone who who has businesses. We've
spoken and touched upon this, but this is very important
because they need to have patience. They have to know
that you can't always pick up the phone, you can't
always answer that tex back. There's going to be a

(26:01):
lot of times that you are having to dedicate a
huge percentage of your time to your children and family.

Speaker 2 (26:08):
I agree, one hundred percent exactly.

Speaker 1 (26:10):
I just think definding someone that's understanding and all the
things that I am requiring or I am not just
requesting it, these are my requirements at this moment in
my life. I whoever my future husband or partner is,
I want them to know that I too would be
willing to be flexible and understanding with all the things
that I am requiring.

Speaker 2 (26:29):
It's not just me, me me, me, me me me.

Speaker 1 (26:31):
I am willing to do these things for you because
I am looking for a reflection of me. So I
am willing to understand. We have to compromise, and I
understand where you're coming from. And I think that being
understanding in the era and the times that we live
in is very important in order for a successful relationship.
So yeah, you know, I think that all these things
come with maturity.

Speaker 2 (26:52):
All these things come with time.

Speaker 1 (26:53):
And it took me a long time and certain experiences
to have the mentality that I have now and to
be able to be like I get it now.

Speaker 2 (27:01):
I understand now what it.

Speaker 1 (27:02):
Is to have a real responsible relationship, a meaningful relationship.

Speaker 2 (27:08):
And I pray that he comes and do.

Speaker 3 (27:09):
Time, no pressure, and that ties into our very last
one here is exactly Well, you just mentioned someone who
is willing to grow learn together with you in your
relationship with you. Just literally laid out so eloquently for
everyone too.

Speaker 1 (27:25):
Yeah, in due time, you know. I am not putting
any pressure right now. I do have lonely moments, and
I'm not a lonely person. I have lonely moments where
I could be in bed and be like, oh, I
wish I had somebody here to cuddle me and watch
Netflix and just be here with me. But it hasn't
happened yet, right And I don't want to rush into
anything and then be like, damn, I should I stay
by myself if I was going to do with this crap?

(27:46):
You know, Godsham is perfect. It all happens in due time.
Ladies out there, if you feel me, if you're single,
if you're you know, going through it. If dating is hard,
trust me, I'm in the dating apps myself. It is very.

Speaker 2 (27:57):
Difficult to find the right person.

Speaker 1 (27:58):
I know that these days, men and women feel that
they have so many options that no one wants to settle.
Everybody wants to be free, you know, and just do
the three months, tryout, next, three months, try out next.
I am afraid of STDs. I am afraid of having
more children with the wrong person. I just want to
do things right this time around, and I will take

(28:19):
my time. This is what you can take home with you.
Don't feel that you know there's not enough time because
you never know when the right person is going to come.
Take your time. Learn to love yourself, learn to enjoy
the process. Feel free to date. Stop trying to put
labels and names on things so quickly because you might
be rushing into the wrong relationship.

Speaker 2 (28:40):
Just let it flow, but let it flow with direction.

Speaker 1 (28:43):
Know exactly what you want, how you want it, what
you're looking for. You can't expect to have the right
relationship if you don't have a list of the things
that you require in order for someone else to enter
your life, and vice versa. So I wish you single
ladies out there the best. I hope that you guys
find that you know that perfect partner as well. If

(29:05):
you have it, girl, just keep working on yourself till
he comes. And also, you have to put yourself out
there too, because he ain't gonna come knock at your door,
whether you go out to lounges with your.

Speaker 2 (29:15):
Friends, or you're on dating apps, or whatever the case
may be.

Speaker 1 (29:19):
Be open, be open to receiving whatever God in the
universe has for you. But that being said, Alex, thank
you so much for putting this together, because you really
hit every single point of every single thing that I
am looking for in my life right now.

Speaker 2 (29:34):
I'm so grateful for you. Thank you, Alex.

Speaker 3 (29:36):
You're welcome. It's like I know you, you know me,
you do.

Speaker 1 (29:40):
Know me, and I really really enjoyed and loved this
episode because it really hit home. I know that there's
gonna be so many people out there listening that can relate.
They're looking for the same things. You're not the only one,
you know. It's a working process. We're all trying to
figure it out out here. It's tough out here in
these streets. But hopingly, Baba the Olds, you know, God
has something waiting for us real soon we'll find that

(30:00):
very tell love that we've been waiting for. But in
the meantime, I just want to thank all of you
guys for being part of Exactly Amada. Subscribe to the
podcast for your favorite podcast platform and head over to
our YouTube channel, where you will be able to watch
or listen to the podcast by searching for microda podcast.
Follow me on my Instagram account at Amara la Nigra

(30:21):
a l N. Amada La Nigra a l N is verified.
You'll feel sick and remember that this has been a
production of Iheart's Microtuda podcast network. For more podcasts from iHeart,
visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen
to your favorite shows. This is your girl, Amalagra, and
you just heard exactly Amada
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