419: My Best Laid Plans

Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hi guys, Hi friend, how's it going. Oh, it's so
good to see your face. It's so good to see
you guys. Listen, Okay, let's start this off right, Okay.
Valerie Burton Ellie is an angel. Yeah. I knew that
was going to happen. Oh my goodness, gracious. So I
didn't even have to write a letter. My agent reached

(00:22):
out to her manager and was like, is there any
way Valerie would do this for Donald? And she said yes,
and she hooked it up. She hooked it up so
much that when we played the message for my daughter,
there was silence for a bit, and then all of
a sudden, my daughter started crying. No, yes, she started crying,

(00:43):
and my wife was like, why are you crying? She said,
it's just so hot in here right now. She got clemped.
Good for Valerie Burton Elly. I told you that would happen,
you just to do it, and you did it. I
can't believe it. Listen. I gotta do something nice for Valerie.

(01:04):
And from from what my daughter's told me, she likes cats,
lemons and puzzles, so I got to figure something out
in that way. My wife is looking at a bunch
of like lemon trees right now to buy Valerie. I'm
sure she has some already, but we're trying to hook
it up for you. Valerie. I know you don't. You
probably don't listen to the podcast, but let me just

(01:25):
put it out there to all of you out there
who was asking if Valerie came through. Valerie came through. Well,
I just want to say. My father used to say,
I have no idea. I don't. I've told this story before.
My father used to tell this story. I have no
idea if it's true or not, but it was. It
was inspirational to me. And he said, the Queen of
England came to New York City to do you know,

(01:47):
things you do as a diplomat or whatever a queen
And she only went to one store. She went shopping
at Bloomingdale. And the media was going crazy like, how
did you get the Queen of England of all places
to come shopping and blue like the best press ever?
How did you guys do it? And they said, we
asked her and my father always told that story and

(02:08):
it's always been an inspiration to me. And you simply
did it? Donald? You? You? You? You asked her and
she said yes, and she is amazing for saying yes,
you know, she was amazing before that, but just to
do that for Wilder. They shared the same birthday, but
just to do that for Wilder is so special. And
I know Wilder really really really loved it because she

(02:30):
showed all of her friends, and her friends were like, oh,
that's great. But all of the parents when they saw
the video, they were going crazy. The parents were like,
oh my god, you got Valerie Burton Nellie to wish
you a happy birthday. It's just it's so amazing. I
love that she like, did she fan her eyes? Did
she do this thing? She didn't do the fanning of

(02:50):
the eyes, but she you know, she looked at it
and just I was We were shocked because she didn't
say anything. We were expecting like this scream of happiness.
It's like this abundance of joy to just blow from her,
and she was in complete shock. Then she started crying
and we were like, why are you crying? She's like
it so well, I have a present coming for her.

(03:15):
It's belated, but it's it's all good. It's all good. Well,
you know, I'm out of town right now, and when
I get back, this show airs the day I get back.
So when I get back, I'm going to spoil the
crap out of my daughter. Uh. You know, when I
was a kid, I would call well, in my twenties,
I would call it my birthday month. She's gonna have

(03:36):
a birthday month, even though the months almost over. I'm
gonna do as much as I possibly can to make
her even more happy than she was. The kids are
gonna be so excited to see you. I'm glad you're home. Oh,
I can't wait to see those lovelies. I can't wait
to see my wife. To be honest with you, you know,
I'm poor, poor gal. I'm going to I'm going to

(03:57):
be civilized and I will not pre sure my wife
into any type of fornication. She's probably excited for some fornication.
She just probably should limber up because it's been a bit.
She might want to just do some basic pilates or
you know, just due to peloton whatever it is that
you want to do, whatever it takes for you to

(04:19):
get ready for this action, for relations or the tails
with this script, there's a lot of relations in this episode.
One an episode. I gotta tell you, I laughed my
butt off. Let me who directed this episode? Well, listen,
are you really asking that? Yeah? Yeah, it was me.
I knew it. Now listen, I gotta tell you something.
And I don't mean to toot my own horn, you guys,

(04:40):
but I'm but get ready for it too, too, because
what I always do is when I'm watching an episode
and I think it's well directed, I always grab this
little sheet I have that Joel made forest and I'm like,
who we directed this one? It's well done. And then
I because I didn't remember from Yeah, I didn't remember
this either, buddy, and I looked down and I'm like, oh,
it's me. And I'm not just saying this because I writed,
fucking this is a really good episode. Bill Callahan wrote it.

(05:03):
It's very very, very funny. I mean there's there's a lot,
there's a high joke ratio. There's just joke joke joke
joke joke. It's really well photographed, I must say. And
I laughed a lot. Did you did you like it?
I laughed a lot. I knew I knew you directed
it too, and I and I I was because I
was out with my cast mates before this. We were

(05:25):
having our final brunch together like a you know, the
final hangout before you know, we all say I do
and um. When I was watching the episode when it
was over, I was like, I think Zach directed that.
And I went to rewind it to look, but it
was already five oh one, and I was like, I
gotta get on this call. I gotta get on his

(05:46):
zoom or and but in my mind, I was like,
Zach had to have directed this. This has Zach's stamp
all over it, like it feels like something you would
have done. You know. This was the very different from
the other one that we always joke, my first one,
because it's it's basically contained solely to the hospital and
you know some there's some apartment sets and a restaurant set,
but it's it's very contained. And I think that I

(06:09):
was trying to to show like, all right, well, what
you know, we've seen so many Scrubs episodes at this point,
what can I do to add a bit of style
to this one that's relatively contained? And I came up
with some of these motifs. There's this sort of window
motif coming into different scenes in and out of windows,
and in fact, the very last beat of the of

(06:30):
the episode, I closed the window and and that's that's
sort of hyper speed imagination thing. I think that was
that was written. But I mean, how do you how
do you go through like what could have been very quickly?
And m I thought that was really really a cool
thing to do. I remember this episode because this is
the episode that you that JD and Kydlie break up in,

(06:52):
and I remember that there was this there's a huge
argument at the end, and I remember thinking, Wow, the
two characters really went in on each other at the
end of this episode, and uh, which is rare for
a relationship that hasn't that where there are no stakes involved. Really,
like you, all you guys have done is kissed really
and so for you to she's let's get into the show.

(07:15):
We count it, let's do it, Saturn stories about show
we made about a bunch of dots and nurses and said,
he's the stories so YadA around here? Are yeata around here?

(07:40):
M Hi Daniel, hw' joel. How's it going, buddy, guys,
I'm having fun. I am you know. I had a
streak bustered today. Uh at this brunch I did. I
did partake in some booze, some libations like marrying no

(08:01):
I had a vodka martini whoa at brunch? Ballsy? Yeah,
very ballsy and uh but I did. The streak gets broken.
I'm gonna start a new streak. But I will say that.
I will say this, my plant based situation is pretty cool. Man. Like,
I gotta tell you something ahead. I've never poohed so

(08:22):
lovely in my life. Yeah, my lovely. Yeah, in the
words of in the words it felt good. Oh my god,
poo feels good right now, like really good. Like I'm
so excited. I'm going to need that as a thing
for the sound. I'm gonna be honest with you. Poo
feels good. It does, it does. It's like, oh god,

(08:43):
it feels good. Like. That's how regular it is now,
whereas before without the water, you know, you're hydrated and
you're not. I'm sorry to grow. Somebody go into details.
I think my poo is good? Is enough for the audience, Okay,
there we go. Anything, Yeah, any my J shaped her

(09:04):
or a letter JA, as long as it's a deuced Yes.
We we weren't allowed to say that. We were allowed
to see so much stuff in scrubs, but we were
not allowed to describe a pooh as a coil or
a letter J. In THEE it turned into will figure
out What's wrong with you? As long as it's a
deuced Yes, a lot as funny as a coili or

(09:25):
a letter J. It's so funny, you know what the
sensors um. You know, we had a bcality joke last week,
but we weren't allowed to describe the coil shape of
a of a Pooh. But anyway, you know, UM, I
want to say the two things. I watched this Ana
Kendrick movie on Netflix called Stowaway. It was really good.

(09:46):
Never seen it. I recommend it just came out. It
is about UM. Without spoilers, it is about UM. Three
people who have been chosen to go to Mars too.
I think they're going from Mars for the first time
and I yeah, it's like you know where, it's the

(10:09):
point in history when the travel to Mars and back
takes two years and these people are are headed there
for a mission and shit goes awry along the way.
I know that I heard of this somebody stows away
and I don't ruin it for people, don't. I mean,
it's called stowaway. You can imagine there's a Stoway, but
it's in the promo though, they only have enough food

(10:31):
for two people and how do they survive? Oxygen? And
I tried not to spoil it for you guys, but
Donald says, it's in the trailer. But it's really really
good script. And I like Anna Kendrick. I think she
does a great job and and I don't know, it's
really really well done. So I recommend that to you.
And the other thing I loved, which I've been procrassing
because the Oscars are tonight. We were recording on Sunday

(10:53):
and I was procrastinating watching The Father for some reason
because it's the Anthony Hopkins Olivia Coleman film. When I thought,
I think I know what that is, I'm going I'm
not gonna. I don't know if I'm in the mood
for it. It It sounds really dour. My brother said, you
got to watch it, and I we have a similar taste.
And I watch it and it is amazing. Have you
guys seen it? No, I haven't seen any of the

(11:15):
movies nominated this year to be I highly recommend The Father.
It is again no spoilers, but all I can say
is it's about an older man losing his memory. But
the way the director and the script tell the story,
you start to feel like you're losing your memory. And
I've never I've never seen a film like this. It's

(11:35):
very innovative. Um. The storytelling is such that you can't
help but start to feel the troubles of the protagonist
in your own mind. You're just what I can't. I
don't want to ruin anything for you. But and apparently
it's based on a play, And the whole time I'm thinking,
oh my god, this must have been so fascinating as
a play. Um, I think the I think the the

(11:58):
the play right adapted his own play into a screenplay.
But anyway, I don't just think it's a sad story
about an old man losing his memory. It is that,
but it's incredibly told and don't miss it. Well, I
gotta say something really quick. Go ahead. I'm so upset
at you, Zach. What did I do wrong? Because you

(12:19):
freaking did the Morpheus to me? Man, you told me
to take the red or the blue pill, and now
my life is flipped upside down, like look, I'm not
eating meat anymore. I'm not either, man, dude, you you
freaking opened up the matrix to me and now I

(12:41):
am pissed off at you because you said you're feeling
good and you're loving it, yes, no doubt. But listen, man,
I look, I'm looking at all my friends enjoy steak.
I'm looking at all my friends enjoy chicken. I'm looking
at all my friends enjoy fish and everything like that.
And all I can do is sit there and be judgmental.
Like you guys have no idea what you're eating? Well,
you don't you doing it. I'm trying my hardest not to.

(13:02):
I can't help it. Man, Listen, I can only tell
you that I feel great, and of course I just don't.
Maybe we're different, you you you might. I'm not really
craving um it. No I will, and I'm not saying
and I don't want. I'm the last thing I want
to do is prostize, and I'm not saying that I'm
going to be able to do it forever. I am

(13:23):
two months into it, no alcohol, no animal products, and
I have to tell you that I feel better than
I ever have. That's great, and I understand because you know,
when I was sipping my uh vaka martini today, I
was like, damn, there it goes that streak down the street.
But that doesn't mean you know. You know, another thing

(13:45):
my my therapist has said related to the streak was
don't okay, so you so you fell off the wagon
or you broke your streak. That's that's just step one,
step two, three four. Where you fuck up is then
go ah, fuck it, I fell out of the streak.
Fuck it, let's just have a fuck. Let's just everything like, no,
you get it right back on the horse. I mean,
that's that's the key. Don't don't go. You know people

(14:05):
that say, oh, I'm gonna, I'm not gonna I'm gonna
go to the gym three times a week, and they go,
they skip one, then they skip two, and then they go, ah,
fuck it, I fell off the wagon. Fuck the gym. No,
that's where people really fall off. It's like, no, no, okay,
that happens. Shit happens. Get back on the horse, you know. Yeah,
you know that's that That is the trick, and you

(14:27):
know it's it's it's very interesting because this show's coming
to an end and we're all we're saying goodbye to
each other and everything like that. I find that it's
harder to drink water now because you know, now I'm
not buying water every day because I have I'm leaving
in a couple of days, you know what I mean.
So it's like the water that I have now, I'm
gonna try and sustain until I bounced, because I don't

(14:50):
want to continue to I don't want to overbuy, like
I have stuff in my frist Like. Okay, so when
I first got here, I put all of this fish
because I was like, I'm gonna eat fish. And then
I watched c spiracy and now this fish is rotting.
Well it's not rotting. It's not rotting, but it's sitting
in my freezer. Well you could have given it to
someone who isn't trying to be Um, ain't nobody gonna

(15:12):
take my fish way? I'm sure there's a neighbor in
your building. No, nobody wants that fit. I don't know
none of these people. Actually, if I ever saw a
bag that was like by the elevator, free fish, I'm
not gonna eat that. Okay, well, definitely don't do that.
But there's probably like a shelter something you could like
be like, I have all this rosen fish, I mean
rosen fish. It used to be a dream I want

(15:34):
to say to you all. You know, Donald and I
really responded to this documentary C Spiracy as many people have.
It's been number one all around the world. Um, and
I know there's a lot of people that say, yeah,
like you know, a lot of what he says is true,
but he's exaggerating here, here and here. Well guess what.
Just like Donald reached out to Valerie Bertonilly, I reached

(15:55):
out to the creators of C Spiracy and they've agreed
to come on our show. I love it so, um,
you know, this documentary was very impactful to me and
I I, like everyone else, I want to ask him, like, hey,
if if one third of what you said is true,
I'm I'm down you you you you got me. But
let's let's discuss some of the critiques of it. You know,
it's not I'm gonna we're gonna be good. We're gonna

(16:17):
be good interviewers. We're not just gonna um fall Yeah,
We're not gonna be We're not just gonna fawn. We're
gonna we're gonna challenge him like good interviewers and say, hey,
you know you've been critiqued for X, Y and Z.
What's your response to that, But needless to say, he
and his wife really opened my eyes to U. Two
things I didn't know about, um, you know, the fishing industry,

(16:40):
well not just that, and also game Changer. Man, the
game changer, I didn't you know some of the big
some of the best athletes in the world right now,
record holders Tom Brady, who is old as fucking should
not be playing football right now, Like there's nobody his
age doing it the way he's doing it. But because

(17:00):
of his plant based diet, inflammation isn't an issue for
him anymore, you know what I mean. And so he's
able to put that could because as you get older,
that's the one thing that you deal with, like my back, oh,
my legs, and that's all inflammation. And when you're on
a plant based diet, you don't necessarily have to worry

(17:22):
about those things as much, and you can and you
recover faster. And so yeah, Donald's talking about another one
that we watch called game Changers, which if you if
you want to let it's a softer intro into this conversation,
if you don't want to go right to the pain
that's being caused animals. Game Changers is more focused on
an mma fighter who decided to go plant based and

(17:43):
what happened to his recovery. But anyway, we will stop
talking about this for now, but it's a conversation that
certainly intrigues Donald and I and um, let's talk about Scrubs,
the TV show. Okay, let's get into it. First of all,
how fast did JD get undressed once he thought he
was about to have sex with Kylie? There are so

(18:03):
many laughs, and you know, I I when I take
notes for the episode, I write down, like, you know,
things that made me laugh. I've got two three full
pages of We're not even to get to all the
ship that made me laugh? Yeah, but the first was Yeah,
So I've been on a four week booty embargo because
Kylie has decided that we're not gonna I don't even
it doesn't even seem like we're doing anything besides kissing,

(18:25):
Like she's not even you're not even touching. Yeah, I
don't think we're groping or what did I say people
call it? There's certainly no filatio kind of lingus, but
I don't know if they're heavy petting. That's what our
parents used to call it, right, there's no heavy petting,
which is a funny, the furthest He's gotten his first base.
For all of those who are wondering what we're talking about,
first base, that's it. It seems to me that they're

(18:48):
solely kissing. But I get it. She's a knockout beauty
of a woman. She's smart, she's funny. He's very into her.
He's he's saying, whatever whatever you want. Well, I'm being
as patient as I can. Um, but it's funny. I
laughed when I go. She goes, I got you something. God,
I hope it's sex or a pony. I'll bet it's sex,
because I don't see a pony. There's no way JAD

(19:17):
wanted sex on the same level as a pony. Well,
I mean, pony comes once in a lifetime sex. I
believe you could get it again. I know. But the
poor guy is really willed up. We learn. We learned
very soon after that he's going home and pleasuring. What
do I say? I go, I go to visit you guys, right, wait,
hold on, you tell us, you tell us that you've

(19:37):
done it already. But then you're like, I'm gonna stick.
I'm going now it's time for my lightly ritual nightly
ritual and now it's time for my nightly ritual pleasure
myself a weep and repeat. Um yeah. So well back
when I'm there and she turns around, I'm naked, and
then I'm trying to cover because that's not what she

(19:58):
got me a license place for Sasha, and I say, oh, no, no,
I'm just doing laundry. I assume your facilities are in building.
And then I go, I'm just really proud of my
abs or ab u. And now you and Carla are

(20:19):
in a bad place. You're arguing about everything. You claim
that she's making mountains out of mole hills. What she
kind of is you know, the toothplate, the toothpaste line
is hilarious. You know, turk. If you can't put the
cap on the toothpaste, how are we supposed to ever
have children? Right? But I do there are things that
like Couples like little things. I mean the classics, you know,

(20:40):
the classic trophy one is the toilet seat putting out
up and down. But there are little things that drive
couples crazy. Yeah I do. I would not be down
with a messy toothpaste tube. I like it very very nice.
I don't want it. I don't want to all the
gunk call over the top and roll. You can't be
married to Casey, then why would she do Casey squeeze?

(21:01):
First of all, Casey squeezes the shit out of the toothpaste, right,
and it doesn't matter where it's from. Like I'm the
type of person that's like, all right, let's do it
from the bottom, so we always have the toothpaste, just
with the toothpaste something like that. Casey's like she'll grab
it from the middle and just squeeze, sacrilege, and I'll
be like, oh my god, that's the ugliest toothpaste canister

(21:21):
I've ever seen in my life. Now, But I totally,
I totally hear this. Like my my wife is we
make we both do it, but we make mountains out
of mole hills easily. Yeah. You know, well, you know,
I think couples can get on each of those nerves
with like little things. It's just little things that irk
you and that make you go. You know, it's it's

(21:43):
so tiny, who cares, But it's just you know, we
all have our little quirks, things that just drive us crazy. Yeah,
like that paper not being replaced, Like come on, let's
let's replace the teletpaper. My wife has a bunch of
them when it comes to me. But she's hard on me.
You know how it goes, Well, she's pretty great, she's amazing.
I'm not saying she's not amazing, but she's hard on me. Yeah.

(22:06):
She she expects the best and she deserves the best.
So you know, um, the janitor I really didn't remember
the level of the janitor's crush on Elliott. I for
some reason, I didn't remember that. I mean, he's really
pining for her, Yeah, so much so that he's he
bets doctor Cox that there will be dating, uh, that

(22:29):
they're gonna go that they are dating. And and it's
a big bet. It's for his for his porsche, but
it's for the janitor's van. Janitor puts his van up
for doctor Cox's Porsche, right and Elliott he you know
Elliott and doctor Cox are you know they don't you know,
Elliott doesn't like Cox very much, or if she does

(22:51):
like him, she hates the fact that he's always interrupting hers,
fucking with her. We see in the ICU he's embarrassing
her in front of her residence and and you know
he's always fucking with her and for no reason, and
so she has a motivation to try and get back.
The janitor comes to comes to Elliot and says, look,
I have a bet going. Will you help me out?

(23:12):
We got he's got a trick Cox to think that
we're on a date. And then I get his Porsche
and she's like, yeah, fuck that guy, let's do it.
Let's do it right, and he says the janitor says,
I just want a house in the burbs, Volvo in
the driveway, dog fighting ring in my basement, basement. That's
not funny. It's not funny. It's not funny. Is not funny,

(23:34):
But the janitor having it be one of his dreams
is funny. I'm sorry, I understand, but there are a
bunch of animal lovers out there at a like, fuck you,
Zach right now, I'm just gonna put it sorry. I
do not support having a dog fighting ring anywhere period.
But the janitor pitching it as one of his dreams
had the Graham's back. Yeah, and holy shit, does she
look beautiful. She's always beautiful, I know, but you know,

(23:57):
we shot her with the backlight of the slow motion
and the lingerie, and um, she looks fuego, dude. There
are moments in this show where I was like, oh boy,
oh boy, oh boy. I mean you guys, when you
guys crash into the bedroom at the end of the show,
she looks and you pull the pants the dress down. Yeah, naughty.

(24:18):
Oh yeah, I got in the hallway when you got
a movement. Well I didn't. I wasn't gonna say that,
but I definitely felt some kind of way. Oh, I
was feeling great that my directorial work may have given
my best friend movement. I wasn't gonna say that because
you did it just shift a little. There was there
was like there was like a little yeah and like
a centimeter. It just moved like sorry to use the

(24:40):
metric system, but your peep shifted like a centimeter, like
there was right there was. It was yeah, if it
were if it were, if it were a clock, yeah,
it went from it went from six to six to
six yeah. Whatever it is, like it wouldn't be pointing
up what's down, so it'd be like, oh so I
went to like six. If it was at six thirty,

(25:02):
it went to thirty five, Yes, exactly. Mine was like
you know when your dog is like lying in like
asleep and then it hears a squirrel and does a
little look up. Yeah, that's my Peepac did like it
hurt a squirrel? It like squirrel? Anyway she was it

(25:22):
was it's a dude. First of all, this is this
is every one's not just men, but women too. This
is a issue that we all have. Can we be
friends with our exes and still maintain a proper relationship

(25:43):
with your current or yourn here's my thinking about this,
and I want to hear everyone's opinion on this, but
I think sure, if it's an occasional hey, how you doing.
Saw the kids on Instagram? Glad? Things are going so well? Whatever,
you know, people definitely crawl us the line, and that's
that's where the trust is broken. Is It's one thing

(26:04):
to be like, hey, small talk, small talk, small talk,
But if what Turk is doing in this episode is
so fucking out of line, cracking up she doesn't know
he's married, I can't wait to visit you. They're like
giggling like that would fucking make anyone's feelings hurt, right,
I know for a fact if my wife was talking well,
I don't know for a fact, but if she was
talking to her ex. Boy, Like, if I see her,

(26:26):
if we're out and ex approaches us, I'm gonna choke
him out, you know what I mean. Like, that's just
how I am with it all. Joel, you might feel
a different kind of way, but best I don't give
a fun like dog respect the situation. Man, you had
your chance, it's over. So you don't stay friends with
any of your exes. I'm not friends with any of
my exes, no wild What about you, Joel and Danel?

(26:49):
What are your thoughts on this controversial topic. If we
ended well and we're buddies, you know, it's fine. If
they're constantly coming around flirting and they don't understand, Like
I definitely there's got to be like new boundaries and
understandings of the relationship. But you know, people are people.
Sometimes the relationship is like, oh you know that just
do didn't work out, But you're so cool person. There's

(27:10):
a reason we got together in the first place. None
of my relationships have ever ended that way. All right,
you're burned the bridge when you leave. Guys, I'm like,
I'm like, fuck you, no fuck me, no fuck you,
no funk do you no fuck me? You know? In action,
movies when the action star is walking away and the
building blows up behind them and they don't turn and

(27:30):
they don't turn around. That's donald that emotion to Carrie,
all right, what about you, Danel? I mean I feel
the same way. I echo that sentiment, like it's it's
really about the attitude that you leave with. I've definitely
had um. I similarly have not had a long term
relationship that has ended that way, but I've had short

(27:53):
term relationships that have certainly ended with friendship and we're
still talking and stuff like that. Short term relate, But
come on, man, short term relationships don't necessarily count because
all the short term relationship was we hooked up once
or twice and that was it, you know what I mean.
But there was love and all of that and commitment
and all of that stuff. You can't freaking you can't

(28:13):
be like, honey, this is my ex honey, I want
us all to get along. That just just doesn't happen.
You just have to be respectful, and I think, and
and it shouldn't personally be like a regular thing. It's like,
you know, I don't I don't think anyone wants to
hear that. You're like regularly chatting with your ex. But
maybe that's an immature perspective. I don't know. But here's

(28:35):
the other thing, though, Like, Okay, I can honestly say
I have been in love three maybe four times in
my life. So there are a lot of relationships that
I was in where it seemed like it might have
been more at the time, but at the end it
was really nothing, you know what I mean. And so

(28:57):
and so I feel like those related ships also fall
in the same category as we hooked up a couple
of times it was nothing though, you know what I mean.
It's when the relationship was something and it broke up
for whatever you know what you know, for whatever reason
it was. You can't look back at that, you know
what I mean. I made that mistake before, and it

(29:19):
is the wrong it is, you know, regardless of what
your life, where you are in life, that's the wrong thing.
That's just me. Well, I I think we can all
agree that Turk, especially in the context of their relationships,
having some troubles. Turk flirting with his college girlfriend and
not telling her that he's married and being like, we

(29:41):
got to hang out is pretty fucked up. He's trying
to have his cake and eat it too. Yes, and
we will talk more about having your cake and eating
it too when we come back from this commercial message.
We'll be right back. A gurgle, gurgle we missed. I

(30:03):
missed the gurgle. You can gurgle. You can gurgle every
now and then. Gurgle, gurgle, Yeah, gurgle, gurgle, gurgle. Take it.
Oh gross Joel's face. Did you see what you did?
You like it is? Trying to brace for it. It
just kept coming. I kept coming, all right. Speaking of

(30:35):
Thunder's applause and turning your key, I got a shout
out Sean McBean from the graphic designer from Power Puff.
I hope I'm saying your name right. If not, I
will find out before we But this brother hooked it
up for us. Motherfucker's He fucking made a turn your

(30:55):
We each get a key that we can turn, then
a nuclear button to push. Why I can't he must
be a set dresser. He's not a No, he's a
graphic designer. So he did that, and he also did
for the show. He also made me a lightsaber and
he also got me an e Walk self from the

(31:17):
original e Walk cartoon. That I was telling, which is
nap first of all, which is now on Disney Plus.
So like they have the Vintage collection on Disney Plus
right now, and you can watch the cartoon from Celebration.
You can watch the e Walk cartoon. You can you
can't watch Droids. Droids not on it, but you can
watch the original Clone Wars cartoon, which was created by

(31:38):
the guy who did Samurai Jack Ukovsky, right, who I
think has some connection to Powerpuff Girls. Sure does. Is
one of the shows he worked on. He was an
animator on that show, and then he did Dexter's Lab
and then Samurai Jack. All I gotta say is there's
a rumor out there that the Professor Professor Utonium is Samurai.

(32:00):
Now that's been dispelled and everything like that, But wouldn't
it be awesome? Yeah, it's a fun fan theory. Wouldn't
it be awesome if somewhere down the line, if the
Powerpuff Girls gets picked up, I'm swinging a Samurai sword.
I'm just putting it out there. I'm ready, I'm all
for it. I'm all for it. Anyway, should we talk

(32:23):
about Falcon and the Winter Soldier? Um? Yeah, how did you? Yeah,
let's do a quick a bit on that. Let's do
a quick I loved it. I'm gonna be honest with you.
That speech that Mackie gives at the end is right
on point. Um. You know, it's you know, the best
way to I guess nullified trolls is to shout him

(32:48):
out right away. And he does it. You know, like
he knew right that, like Marvel knows, everybody knows, a
black captain in America, America might not be ready for
you know what I mean. Yeah, they just went straight
at it. I like that they just went straight at
it. It It was like very meta. He was like, Yo,
you know, I could feel the stairs through the television
right now, people hating this, And I thought that was

(33:09):
I thought that's I think that's honest. You know, here's
my opinion. I feel like wand Division and Captain America
and The Winter Soldier needed a couple of more episodes
to tie everything up. I feel like all of it's
rushed because however many episodes they have, and so as

(33:32):
as much as I love both shows, I feel like
there's no way you could wrap it all up with
just one episode the way they both did. That's just
me personally. Well, it feels like they're building up for
either a film or another season. Right. I don't know, Joel,
what do you think they really did? By the way,

(33:52):
I knew that it was a black and white bromance,
but since you planted in my head that you know
we were the last, you know, famous black and white bromance,
that they really did jump on our on our bandwagon.
So I would like a cut of all the profits.
I feel like they owe me ten percent. I'm just
gonna put out, Joel, how do you feel about it?

(34:13):
It's let's talk because I don't like it. If I
knew you did, I knew you did. One was the
best and then it just totally jumped to the tracks.
I'll keep it short so we have a lot of
other things to talk about. But a lot of the
secondary characters were not fleshed out enough for me. The
the entire like people's army thing there and then gone,

(34:35):
and then they denarished the lead chick where they were here,
like why did she turn evil? What happened? Very confusing. Um.
I will say the bromance was great. Somebody on Mackie's
speech was like the Juilliard jumped out, and I was like,
it's your dick, because he performed the hell out of
that speech. Yes he did. There's a lot to like,
but for me personally, it's not as a complete a
vision as Wanda Vision was. Um just from started to finish.

(34:59):
Wanda visions like a very clear through line where this
was muddled. And that's not you can't believe Marvel. It's
not their fault, or maybe it is, but they were like, hey,
originally there was a big pandemic, yeah in the show,
and they cut it all up and you can definitely
tell in some scenes and so just oh, there was
all there was a subplot of a pandemic. There was

(35:21):
a subplot of a virus that was killing a lot
of people. And that's what and that's originally what Carly
is that her name on the show, Carly. That's what there.
That's what Carly and the flag Smashers are doing. They're
trying to save all of these people. Like in the
first episode when the Winter Soldier jumps on the truck

(35:44):
and Carly's on the truck, He's like, there's they have
they have a vaccine. That's there, they have vaccine. And
that was for this virus that was supposed I have
I have some thoughts on the fights fights, like, yeah,
I did. I just think, um, sometimes fights are shot

(36:06):
in such a way. I'm not someone who's as a
director photographed an elaborate fight scene. UM, but I think
sometimes you watch a fight and you can you know
where you are, you know the context of the people
in the battle. And then other times it's just like
a collage of like fists and it's just like MAYHEMI

(36:27):
collage and I don't know where everyone is in the room.
I've lost track of the geography of the fight. And
I don't like that as much. I don't know, I
don't think, I don't well, I'll say this, that fight
between H the H Captain America and U George Saint
Pierre where freaking He's doing all the flips and every

(36:49):
where the falcon What Captain America is doing all the
flips that ship was fly to death? To me, I
thought that was so cool. And then when he catches
the punch from Carly and he uses the wings to stop,
you know, to brace himself and everything. I thought that
was very like unique and I would I did not
see like my whole thing was like, how Sam going
to beat these people when they're all super soldiers. But

(37:13):
his costume or his armor like Iron Man, helped him
out completely. So he has no special powers, zero power.
The only power that he has is his ability to
empathize with people, you know what I mean. And that's
what makes him a great Captain America. He can you
know what I mean, he sees why Carly is doing

(37:33):
what she's doing, but he also understands why the government
is doing what they're doing. And he, you know, his
super sam superpower is his ability to talk to soldiers
who need it, you know. And it's always been his
superpower for me as someone who's watching as a filmmaker, going,

(37:54):
you know, I'm trying to learn, like you know, in case,
I watched these things that I don't know anything about,
sometimes trying to learn, like let me deconstrud how this
fight was shot and see. And then sometimes I watched
them and I go, Wow, that's that was incredible, Holy shit,
how they do that? And sometimes I and this isn't
just Marvel, I'm saying, and you know, and sometimes I
watch them like I don't like the ultimate example of

(38:15):
this is Transformers, like two giant pieces of metal clashing
against each other. I'm like, I don't know where we are.
I don't even know what that is. You're showing me
some piece of metal hitting another piece of metal and
there and then all of a sudden, how do we
get in a warehouse? Right? Yeah? And so it's just
we've I I I appreciate and the direction of fight
sequences where where you the viewer are clear, like where

(38:38):
we are in the context of the room, and it's
not just like tight shots of visual mayhem. Yeah. Anyway,
let's get back to scrub. But a great show it is, Okay, So, uh,
the brain Trust switches crazy? Is this some crazy eyes
Margo's first appearance. No, she's been in the show before,

(39:00):
but this is her first appearance. Maybe this season. Oh
my god. I laughed out loud when when he switches.
First of all, he goes he goes tug boat. He's
trying to get the brain Trust going, and he goes, um, wait,
what's this? I gotta how can I get blonde doctor
to go out on a date with me? And one

(39:22):
what Troy says? Troy says something like you should just
burn her house down? And then no, no, not Troy,
Marty says. Marty says, Marty says, you should just burn
her house down, and then Troy goes, I've got the
perfect plan, but I need a tug boat. Yeah. And
then the janitor says, that's all I ever get from
you guys, tug boats and arson. Yeah, and he goes, Randall,

(39:44):
I saved you from that eagle. Yeah. That family laughs
so hard. That was so funny. And then he goes, marg, well,
I found your birth mother. She was a tree person.
There's no shame in that. Now. I don't even know
what that means, but it was funny, he goes. And
then he goes, you guys are out, and he turns

(40:05):
around and his new brain trust is Doug the todd
and Ted the lawyer, and he goes, guys are and
I need you to focus all your attention on me,
and they all put down what they're doing and listen. Yeah,
they're all excited to hang out with them. I think
that like on the on the in the chain of
who's cool the janitors above the three of them. Yeah,
he's above all of them. Well, when he said I

(40:28):
found your birth mother she was a tree person. That's
one of those things where it just sounds funny. I
don't really even know what it means, but I laughed.
I guess she lives much like the Ewoks. She lives
in a in a tree village. He says, Randall, I
saved you from a fucking eagle. Yeah, an eagle tried
to get Randall. Eagle literally eagle tried to grab Randall
while he was walking down the street. And that is

(40:50):
a scene. He really really, we really were deprived of
a good scene the janitor's saving Randall from the Would
you have directed that scene? Oh? Man, I I would
have spent the whole budget. I uh, that would have
been a crane. Would have been a crane, definitely when
MC crane. We probably would have had done green screen
with a with a CGI eagle, and then we would

(41:10):
have hung Marty. If we would have hung Marty from
some wires and had him scream and then the janitor
jumps up and grabs his lips. Yeah, and then the
janitor would jump up, probably on the green screen and
just be pulling Martie's legs. Oh my god. If anyone
wants to um to fund that, I can. I would

(41:34):
love to get everybody together, you know how they're doing
like NFTs. We could make that as an NFT. The
scene where um, where the janitor saves Marty from an eagle,
we skipped a couple of things. I have a Heather
looking like fire. We covered that. Um. Oh what about

(41:56):
when her patient um goes. Oh he's back. That guy.
He gets to laugh every time he goes. They've landed.
Grab some blankets and all the canned goods you can carry.
We're moving to the sewers. And then he does his
exit like the Kermit the Frog exit where the body
goes first and the heads laughs. Oh yeah, I'm sure,

(42:17):
I said to Bill I was directing. You know, I
would always direct after a week off, so I could,
you know, prep because it prepping in episodes a lot
of work. And the extra bonus was that I would
be around in the writer's room and pitching random jokes
in a way that I couldn't be when we were
making the show because I was on set and I
just I'm sure. I was like Bill, we gotta get
Heather's patient back because that guy was was in my

(42:38):
first episode. That was very funny. And then Elliotts has
fingers like biceps. Oh my god. Then the door closes
and the fingers and when she when she pokes me
and I fall down the other down like a rock
climbing jazz pianist. That's what I say, got fingers like

(43:00):
a rock climbing jazz pianists. But wait, what about when
I go a little Birdie told me that you say,
you say a little birdie and you're not actually having sex?
And I look and it's little nurse Birdie and I go,
I trusted you, well, it's true. And then uh and

(43:20):
then uh. This this part had me rolling. So the
janitor tricks Elliott to going to dinner with him again. Yeah,
and on his way to dinner, he walks outside and
runs into the New brain Trust. Yeah, they go, sorry,
there all deck down. He goes, sorry, guys going out off,
We're going out to the bar. Hoppings off, I have

(43:43):
a date. And Ted the lawyer says, oh, man, I
ironed my going out here, and he has to a
on and then he flinked it two pay to the ground.
What about Rob's outfit? Rob's wearing a mesh T shirt
and let not only is it a mess T shirt,
it's um it's a crop top. It's a mesh crop top.

(44:05):
Oh my god, Carrie Bennett our costume designer, must have
so much fun dressing Rob. Yeah, it's a mesh crop
top and leather pants. Is that leather pants? Yeah? Tight
leather pants. And then um, and then Johnny Castle has
his has his fanny pack on. He is going out
fannie pack and they're all lying on Cox's Porsche. Porsche. Yeah,

(44:27):
like all four of them. We're gonna get into Porsche.
I guess. Now, what about when I, um, this is
the first appearance of mister Peeps, my talking British penis.
Now is there talking British penis played by the janitor
played by Neil Flynn. Know whose voice was it? I
didn't know. I thought it was Niels, but I could
be wrong. I laughed out loud when I'm like, mister Peeps,

(44:48):
why are you British? And then he got mister peeps goes.
I'll explain later. Just lose the extra bitches. It was
like a family guy. What's his name? Yeah, the don't
no Stewie, the baby. I'll explain later. Just lose the
extra bitches. That's a pretty good Stewie. I didn't I
didn't even watch The Family Guy. I just know that

(45:08):
that's kind of what Stewey sounds like, what are you
kidding me? What about when the janitor says I kissed
a dude once? It was at furnace Camp. Furnace Camp.
The janitor was so into janitor like things as a
child that he went to furnace Camp. Always skid thing

(45:29):
something that was funny when the janitor is trying to
bet Cox and the and Cox goes, I have no
need for a crack thermis and two rings of keys.
The kid, Oh that was Johnny Propp. Okay, I'm skipping ahead. No,
we're at the bar and I just spoken to my
British Penis, and you get rid of the two girls,
which are Carla and Elliott. Yeah, and Johnny Props is

(45:52):
the bartender. Yeah, our prop master is the bartender there. Now.
I thought this was really cool this um, the way
that the after me um did this sort of what
would have happened if I pushed Heather's hair out of
her face thing? I thought that was really cool because
you know, you know, the audience seeing it for the
first time just assumes that is what happened, and we

(46:13):
do this sort of I've never seen this movie Sliding Doors,
but people always reference to Gwyneth Peltro movie Sliding Doors.
When you talk about this, like what would have happened
if this, if if I'd gone this direction, and then
how my life would have been different. Okay, but I
didn't do that. I did this instead, and I thought
that was cool. It was well done. Yeah, you know,
it reminds me of my favorite movie, What's Up, La

(46:34):
La Land. Yes, there's a La La Land moment to it.
It's like it's like, well, at least we get to
see what would have happened, you know what, right, but
then we also see what really happened. And you know, JD,
like Turt puts his foot in his mouth at the
end of this, at the end of this episode, which yeah,

(46:57):
you know, my wife always tells me this. She's like,
you can lie and lie and lie all you want,
but eventually the truth comes out, you know, and it's true.
You know. JD blew off Kylie to go hang out
with Molly. And when he gets when he realizes, oh,
I don't want to be with Molly. I want to
be with Kylie. And he gets to the apartment, he

(47:20):
his honesty just comes out and he tells Kylie the truth.
I was out with this one girl, and I realized
I didn't want to be with her. I wanted to
be with you. Yeah, he's trying to use it as
a as a as a means of hitting on her, like, Hey,
how great did I do? Meanwhile, I mean, we assume
he's drunk, because he is, you know, obviously drunk, so

(47:41):
he's not he's not only being careful with his words
or yeah right and uh and that causes them to
break up. Um, do you think that she over reacted
a bit to that? You know, I don't think he
really did. They they're they're not. I mean, I assume
they're in a committed relationship. There are a month in well,
she definitely thinks they're in a committed relationship. But because

(48:03):
of Turk and Turk's theory of having your cake and
eating it too, because he felt like, I'm talking to
my ex girlfriend and it's harmless because I take all
of that energy and I bring it back to Carla,
JD feels like, yeah, you know, he falls for the
Oaki dog Turks. Turk's logic is obviously shit, you know
what I mean, Like, he's not the smartest dude on

(48:23):
the planet. Oh, I want to talk about Neil's acting,
because Neil never gets to play a sincere moment. The
janitor is always the broad comic relief. And I thought
it was really nice to see Neil play a very
sincere moment with Sarah. I thought that was a really
so I was surprised by it. It was great. Well,

(48:44):
not only was it great, the fact that he learns
her name, He learns her name early on, and when
she walks away with yeah, it's him saying Elliott under
his breath as she leaves, like yeah, so you know,
to him, they had a moment and he really loves her.
He's really I mean, you know, it's it's it's funny.

(49:05):
It's a testament to Neil's acting and and just his
skill as a performer that you know, he's so broad,
he's the broadest person on the show in a lot
of ways. And then all of a sudden, and obviously
a testament to the writing of the show, but all
of a sudden, you know, all he just drops in
and he plays it straight and he's like's a grounded moment. Yeah,
And he's a grounded moment and you buy it. And

(49:26):
it's so beautifully performed, and I made me want more
of it. I was like, you know, I don't want
to mess with what Neil's doing because it's everyone's loves it.
But it was so heartfelt and um and that's a
very tricky thing to do. Also to go from so
broad and so crazy, crazy crazy, then to have a
moment where it's grounded and it doesn't take away from

(49:50):
the character. If anything, it enhances the character. Well, it's
so it showed us a new side to the character.
And also I thought it was just heartbreaking. I thought anyone,
anyone who's ever been in a situation where there was
unrequited love and they were pining for someone who had
no interest in them could relate to those feelings. He said,
you know, you treat me with respect, and I know

(50:10):
that you don't feel the same way that that I
do about you. But you know, I'm sorry. You know,
I don't know the words of it, but it was
but it was really really beautifully done. And then calling
her Elliott when she walked away, it was just like
Chef's kiss. Well and also, like we always talk about,
the music is perfect at this moment, Josh, and let's
end the show with that beautiful song by the way

(50:32):
Carrie Brothers has a song and this too. His beautiful
song Waiting for Your Letter is during one of the
montage sequences. I love that song. But we end with
one of our I think it's safe to say one
of our favorite Josh Raising songs, Closer, right Donald beautiful song. Yeah,
well that first record used to be my jam. And
then the video was amazing too. I remember we you

(50:52):
shot the video, you directed the video, Yeah, at the
Hollywood Bowl, at the Hollywood Bowl, and you had all
of these great light cues. Yeah, And I remember I
remember the video concept is Josh pays the janitor of
the Hollywood Bowl, or to the custodian of the Hollywood Bowl.

(51:13):
He pays him money so he can come in and
perform one song, like it's his dream to perform there.
So he could perform one song on the stage, and
the custodian lets all these lights go crazy for him
and everything while he performs closer to an empty house.
And I thought that was I remember that video, and

(51:34):
I remember thinking the concept was really dope also because
if you could have that moment, it doesn't need to
be necessarily a packed house. But if your dream was
to play the garden and nobody was in the garden,
but you got all the effects and the lights were
out and everything like that, and you could do one song.
Wouldn't you take that opportunity? Wouldn't you go for it? Well,

(51:54):
it's so cool because you know, for those of you
don't know about the Hollywood Bowl in Los Angeles, it's
just the most beautiful place to see music. It's an
outdoor amphitheater and it seats like eighteen thousand people or something,
and it's just a very very just google image Hollywood
Bowl and you'll see what it looks like. It's beautiful.
And so the concept was that Josh is a you know,
young singer songwriter that's by no means selling out the

(52:18):
Hollywood Bowl or probably even a small club. The character
in the video and he pays off the door guy.
Know what. The way I shot it was, I kept
it contained for the first part within the dome of
the bowl, so you don't really know where you are.
You think you're in some really bizarre space. And then
at a certain point when the song kicked in, we
had this giant crane and we pulled back to reveal

(52:40):
that he was playing to an empty house at night
with the Hollywood Bowl, and we programmed the lightboard to
just go crazy with the lights. And then he finishes
the song and the little ghost lamp is just on
the stage and he just sort of packs up his
guitar and walks off. It was really cool. Check it out.
It's on the YouTube's. It is on the youtubes. And
then at the intern is dumb like, oh yeah, Turk

(53:04):
says the dumbest shit I've ever heard in my life.
He's like, well, you know, he was like, I did it.
I told her that we could no longer talk to
each other anymore. I got rid of her. And Carla
asks him, well, that was really fast. How did you
do it? He was like, it was simple. I told
her I was married. Yeah, what else? Fucking and you're not.
You can't even blame it on being drunk. Jad's drunk

(53:26):
from the from the bar. Turk is just dumb. Yeah,
Turk is stupid in that moment. In that moment, what
about when the when when Cox puts the brick on
the accelerator or the dick like at the end, all
of the all of the guys in the show at
the end of this, like the janitor is a dick
for freaking making a bet with doctor Cox. Turk is

(53:47):
a dummy for freaking saying what he said to Carla.
Everyone has a bad look. Yeah, all the guys do.
All the guys, all the guys do. Well another janitor,
Well did you? I guess the janitor man. He lied,
but he's still okay. But I'm going to give the
janitor a pass because what he says to Sarah is
so sweet and he still lied. He's still lied, he
still used her to You know who came off great

(54:09):
in this episode as crazy Eyes Margo. She's just having lunch,
she's not bothering anybody, and when the car blow when
the vand blows up, and doctor Cox just starts cheering, like, oh,
he's such an asshole. But it was funny. I remember,
like you know, it was like Zach. The episode's pretty
contained until the end. We're gonna run a van into

(54:30):
the hospital and explode it. By the way, that like that.
I felt so bad that we blew that van up.
It's like a beautiful antique, but you know, we wanted
to make you laugh listeners. The eighteen van's coming next.
Oh yeah, so and you should be happy because The
reason is he's going to get an eighteen van next

(54:52):
we have a caller today, or no, we do have
a collar before we go to the caller. I know
we're gonna end with Josh Raids closer. Um, but Travis
did send us a mother approved version of the date song. Oh,
let's hear it. You want to hear it, Let's go
now listen. For those of you who aren't caught up
by the way, I find myself humming this song to

(55:13):
myself all day long, which part because I was on
Dua Lipa's levitating, But now I've switched to the Joel
Monique is down to get down? Which part of the
Joel Monique usually it's usually it's no matter what's between
your legs. Tomorrow morning you could be making it. REGs
Joe down down. My part is put the bird out

(55:35):
on and on anytown Joel Monique is down to get down.
Do you find yourself walking around said or apartment humming
before what's your name? Again? We gotta give him a
shout out. I wish he would write us more hooks
for the show. Listen. We can definitely ask him to
do that. His name is Travis Freshner. Well, Travis, I listen.

(55:57):
If you're listening, I have so much sh I can
sign for you if you if you're a Scrubs fan,
I've got an Alex and hoodie I can sign for
you for the Genius show that only went ten episodes.
But um, but listen, we need more of your genius
hooky melodies because the Joel Monique song is just fuego.
Now just there's the listeners up. Sorry, go ahead. No,

(56:18):
there's a remake. That's what we're about to hear. Yes,
we're gonna hear the remake because Joel's mom complained that
those lyrics to the song made her sound easy, and
now we're gonna hear the non what's crazy, it's it's
your favorite part of the song. No matter what's between
your legs and the money, you could be making Joelle's mags.
I know that, no matter what's between your legs in
the morning, you could be making the leggs Joe, get down.

(56:43):
So are we're gonna put it right here? Let's do it. Yeah,
I can play it for you right now if you
want to hear it. Yes, Joe Belmonique is looking so
playing it cool'll be because you kind of girl that love.

(57:05):
Oh yeah, j that's good too. I like it. Yeah,
I just send that one to your mom. But I
still think at the end it should be Joe, Well,
Monique is down to get down. Her mom's not gonna
like that because she makes her sound promiscuous. It's no part.

(57:25):
The part that she thinks makes her sound promiscuous is
when she talks about no matter what's between your legs
in the morning, you could be making her eggs. No. No,
the last thing you're talking about is like, she's down
to get down like somebody but a woman. As long
as you're not a creep, and as long as you're
looking for love, well, that's not enough criteria for for
Joel's lover. I'm sure her mom is like the song

(57:48):
should be like, if you've got a pH d and
maybe if you're going to med school, Joel will do
how with you on a platonic setting, Have you got
a PhD and you're not a fucking creep and you're
making lots of marble tea and and you make a

(58:09):
lot of money, Joe, Joelle Monique will hold your hand,
Joel Monique will hold your hand, all right, well, Joel, Um,
I love the song, and please tell him that what

(58:30):
other moments in the show need a Maybe the guest
arriving needs a theme song. Oh that's ask him. Ask
him because tell him. And I'm not sure if he
listens every week, but please tell him that I'm walking
around singing. He's so good at writing hooky melodies jingles.
I believe they call him. We could we could use

(58:51):
one for the guests, the arrival of the guests. Yeah,
because I think me saying the guest name in the
Oprah Boys, I've done it. How many episodes are you now?
You know that people will riot in these streets if
you don't give them their open people like okay, I'm
just yeah, you know, I mean it makes me want

(59:11):
to say this. That's what I'm talking about, you know
what I'm saying. I prefer you say, well, how about
this one? Do or do not? There is no try.
That is such a I'm not gonna lie. That's a
good yoda. That is a good yoda. Yeah. I can't
believe we got Frank Oz to do that? All righty

(59:31):
on instagrams A vvy W a v v y. He
wrote the jingle for by dating segment. You guys, should
definitely follow him, and hopefully he'll write us a couple
of more jingles. We'll see travvy wavy. All right, we'll
just go to break right, and then we'll have a guest. Yes,
we'll be right back. We'll be right back and we're

(59:53):
back all right. We'll invite our friends in so we
can meet them and discuss. It's one person or two.
We don't need me one, it's one person. I think
I know who it is. Oh, I think I might
know who it is too act. We'll say hello to
Mitch Kelly. Ladies and gentlemen, give it up for a
Mitch Kelly. There he is. Hello there, Mitch. Hey, guys,

(01:00:17):
how are you doing? Can you be merevos? You were
on television on a television you were which show? First
of all, let's get into this. Wait, you're you're going
way too fast, donald, Mitch Kelly, Where do you live? On?
Place called carry Carry at place so crept I named
it twice? Where is it? What country? Australia? It's und

(01:00:41):
north of Sydney. All right now, Mitch, you're wearing the
infamous onesie that that that people love all across the earth.
We know because it's even down in Australia. Now, um,
tell us what happened, because you went at least a
little bit viral in our minds and when we saw
this this week, what what what happened? What did you
do with your onesie? Um? Well, I went on a

(01:01:03):
on a Australian gangshi called Mastermind and you get to
pick your theme and the theme with scrubs and U
and I, you know, I ll admitted way more onesie
with my fat ass on TV that I wasn't gonna
call you fat ass. You look fit. Actually, you look
like a freaking superhero in that looked amazing. By the way,

(01:01:24):
there's only two people in the world who have ever
won the who have ever warned the onesie on national television.
Do you know who the other one is? Drew Barrymore. Yeah,
that's correct, That is correct fause you and Drew Barrymore
are they are the only two legends. And by the way, Joel,
how can we encourage more people to wear their onesies

(01:01:46):
on national television? I feel like there should be a
special gift if you wear your onesie on national television.
Uh okay, we got to figure something out for mention.
Just just help me brainstorm. We're gonna SAT Australia, gonna
take six months to get there, but we're going to
figure it out right now, Mitch, tell us what the
questions where? I don't know this game show? So what

(01:02:07):
is what is the game show? Okay? So it's it's
two rounds of two minutes in the seat and you
get to pick your topic sit scribe. So I picked it.
So it was relating to season five of Scrube. So
like the first question was what is JD's positions? So
I was like attending position. Um. One question was you
know one of the directors won an award for this
specific episode. It wasn't yours, so I didn't mark that up,

(01:02:30):
but I got that wrong. Um. It was like what
was the theme of the one hundredth episode specials? Like
you know it was it of all was et cetera.
So um. So I got nine out of that round
and general knowledge. I absolutely bombed it, absolutely horrendously. Really,
I gotta watch this because I only saw I saw
you come on. It was it was tagged in my

(01:02:51):
Instagram and I saw you come on, and I saw
the host could could not stop laughing at the one
thing I absolutely I had him laughing laps like, so
you must have felt sorry for me or something. No,
I didn't feel sorry. I don't think he's sorry for you.
I think he was jealous too. I think he wanted one.
I'd be jealous of all this as well. Come on,
that's right, that's right. Um, well, dude, you are you

(01:03:15):
meet it to the big time that you are a legend. Dude,
you are a legend, man, truly a legend. It was.
It was employed to try and promote my podcast as well,
so that was all a what's your what's your podcast?
It's called Life's a Mitch Podcasts, so it's a bit
of a planned words, but essentially it's about storytelling. So
I get people who ordinarily wouldn't have the lights shot
on them and give them a chance to tell their

(01:03:37):
story on a on an audio medium. And it's been great.
I met some interesting people so far. How do you
find the people? So there's a podcasting website kind of
like LinkedIn. It's called matchmaker dot fm, and I thought
for starters. My friend put me onto it. I thought
it was a dating scheme for sure, but it was
cool so that she put me onto that. And it's
been so you can either search for guests or show

(01:04:00):
to appear him. That's so clever too. Well, do we
have an American version of that? I can find out serious? Well,
because it'd be cool, Like, you know, if you want
an expert on a topic, and you know, we might
find someone that we know we could reach out to.
But it seems like, oh, we want someone to come on,
who's an expert on this certain topic. That could be
really cool. Well, that's easy if walking use it. Surely

(01:04:20):
anyone can. And you're really hard on yourself. Man, you're
so self deprecating. Come on, you're normal. I'm actually is
that an Australian stereotype self deprecation? So you guys, so
them from a bush tan, like a little country tan.
And if someone if you do not refer to yourself
as a dickhead, there's something wrong with you. So well,

(01:04:43):
you're shocking us. We're shocking us Americans who do the
opposite and just talk ourselves up. Yeah, you could be
from you could be from a ship town in America
and you're like, I am the ship Yes, I run
this shitty town. This place, this place is so shit
to have a mullet festival. So that gives you an example. Yea,
oh my god, that's amazing. That sounds fun. I'm gonna

(01:05:04):
be honest with you, See, what's the kind of person like,
give us an example of someone that's come on your
podcast that you that it was an interesting episode that
you Okay, So I introviewed a lady named Burke. She's
from Zanzibar and she was forced into an arranged marriage
when she was sixteen. So she was that's yeah, that
still happens in this time of the world. It's crazy.

(01:05:25):
So she was forced to move with her husband to
London and forever a decade she had kids to him
and was treated like absolute garbage and she for a
long time, she she she bought her time, and then
she eventually transcended beyond this guy who treated her like
garbage and now she's an in devotional speaker in the
Muslim community around the world. So, wow, that's amazing. I

(01:05:48):
loved I really liked the format of your show, you know.
So it's you know, there's so many there's so many
podcasts um and then sometimes you hear people's like short
burst about what it's about, and you're like, that sounds interesting,
but it's not for me, but I think here's this
really interesting. I would tell you everybody out there you can.
Can you get it wherever you get podcasts? Yeah, so

(01:06:09):
it's on Spotify, Apple, play in sand claud at the moment,
Mitch Life, s ab Mitch check it out, Lives a
Mitch podcasts. Yeah, Live Live Live, some Mitch podcast. It
sounds very interesting and appreciate that's it's a player. It's
a player on Life's a Bitch. For those of you
who I think we get it, I'm just putting it
out there. There's some people that are like me, that

(01:06:30):
are like, Life's a Mitch? What is that a play on?
My friends call me Mitch mail bitch, so you know
it works. They call you Mitch mel bitch. Ye oh,
it's as rough as my head think. Um, all right, Mitch,
do you have any questions for us? Are you just
here to talk about your podcast and how genius you

(01:06:50):
look in that onesie stop it sir? So yeah. First
first question is you can take a favorite character from
any series on movie and put him in scrubs. This
question do you, well, um, who would it be and why?
Any character from any TV shot movie and put them

(01:07:12):
in Scrubs. Okay, you want to go first, here's some
Star Wars. I don't want any ewalks running around our show.
I'm not gonna do that. I'm gonna I'm gonna change
it a little bit, though. I don't know if I could.
I don't know what a character from TV or movies,

(01:07:32):
but I can tell you that a director that I
wanted so bad to direct an episode of Scrubs was
Spike Lee because Spike was such a big fan of
the show too, Like every time Zach and I would
run into him, he's always very nice to us and
always very you know, he's very complimented and everything like that.
And I really wanted Spike Lee to direct an episode

(01:07:55):
of Scrubs. I you know, that was something that I
really wanted. So if I could have any director character
from movie or television or director, it would be Spike.
I would like, grow gou, Um, you're an asshole, dude,
I intersonally would like grow goo. And what's the name
of that robot? The Tika voices I eleven? I want

(01:08:19):
the I G eleven as well. I love that there
was no pause like I thought you might have to
look up for a second. You just looked straight into
the camera with ig eleven. I love Star you know
I love Star Wars, right, I know, brother, I almost
sent you. You know I didn't send you this video
because I'm tired of you're not replying to them. But
I believe, if I'm not mistaken, it's Warwick Davis saying

(01:08:40):
goodbye to the cast members. They're all in costume in
the jungle on that planet returned the Jedi e walk
Planet Indoor, the Forest Moon of Indoor. It's not even
it's not even the Planet of Indoor. It's the forest moon.
Calm down, Calm down, It's a moon. It's a moon. Okay,
you know what it is. It's a fucking backlot, but okay, listen,

(01:09:00):
it's a forest moon of endor. And they're saying goodbye
to him because he must have been wrapped and he's leaving,
and it was very emotional, and I was like, I'm
gonna send this to Dollar and you know what, that
mophone never replies. I might get a thumbs up. I
either get a thumbs up. Listen, if you don't have
the time to write, oh that's cool this, he either
writes a thumbs up. The thing where you click on it,

(01:09:21):
or he'll write, I've already seen that, all right, Mitch.
Do you have another question? Yeah, keeping the same of
podcasts from your art, of course, and when you're about
to listen to one, are there any other podcasts that
you don't more listening to. I have an answer for this,
and I'm not an avid podcast listener because I think
the best time to listen to a podcast is personally
when you're driving UM and I don't haven't been driving

(01:09:42):
that much, but I did drive far away yesterday and
I started something that's amazing if you love movies. It's UM,
the Roger Deakins Podcast UM. And Roger Deakins, if you
don't know, is perhaps the most respected cinematographer alive. He's
got like nine zillion oscars and he sits down with
UM primarily other cinematographers and they talk about how they

(01:10:05):
got started and the craft and UM. Here a movie geek,
and it's particularly a cinematography geek. I highly recommend it.
The title of it is Team Deacons, So I love that.
I was fascinating it was. So that's that's the one
I've listened to. I also like murder mystery ones like
you know, cereals set the bar so high. And then

(01:10:28):
when my girlfriend I sintimes gone road trips, well we'll
try and find another good murder mystery one. Um so,
like you know to binge because I love of love
those Donald. I'm a huge fan of Star Wars The
Black Side podcast that'll be coming out. It was supposed
to be coming out May the fourth. We have to

(01:10:48):
push it back a little bit. Why. I'm a huge
fan of contract issues, but I'm a huge fan of
Star Wars The Black Side and just put it out there.
So let me get this straight. Your answer to his
podcast question is your own podcast that hasn't yet? Thank you, Joel,
thank you. Well that's a good sitle. It's it's it's
what is it the black Side? The black Side instead

(01:11:11):
of the Dark Side with the black side of things.
That's very clever. I will be tuning in. That's cool man.
Wait all right, it's time for Australia's favorite segment. It's
time too fix your lie? All right, match, how can
we help you today? Well? That was that was smoother

(01:11:31):
than my bold head. Well done. Um So, okay, So,
as I'm new at this whole podcasting thing, I'll be
doing it for three or four months and it all
started like this year, I had a bit of a
cross raid, so I went to see a clear point
for a bit of guidance in it sort of reminded
me to do what I love, So it's to talk
to people and hear stories and carry on like an

(01:11:52):
absolute dickhead, so in a good way, in a good way. Um.
So my question is seeing how I'm this whole entertainment
thing and I'm trying to find, like mastraid, what's some
advice you can give to me to sort of help
because I'm struggling to get what listeners as well? So
how can I help get better at my craft and
help promote it a bit better as well? I think

(01:12:15):
you're already off to a great start, man, You've found
You've found first of all, you found a way to
promote your podcast without having to spend any type of
money by going on the game show, by coming here.
These are all great ways to jump off, as they

(01:12:37):
say too, and I think you're going about it the
right way. Now. If you have trouble with listeners after this,
you know, get back at us and we'll plug you again.
You know what I mean? You got you got friends
over here at this you know, your a legend for
rock and that that onesie on Australian television, you know
what I mean. And and because of sorry Donald go ahead, sorry.

(01:13:01):
And because of that you got loved from the Fake
Doctor's Real Friends crew, you know what I mean, and
so and so the way you're going about it right now,
I give you props man, because not a lot of
people can crack the code and you found a way
to do it well. It shows you when you have
the courage to go outside the box, how you can
reap the rewards of that. I mean, you decided to

(01:13:22):
sort of be silly and go on this this um
you know, quiz show, and in being silly and in
putting yourself out there, it landed you not only on
the quiz show talking about your podcast, but we saw
you and you ended up on here. So it's a
testament to you that you're willing to, you know, really
put yourself out there. I would also say that I'm

(01:13:43):
sure if you look on YouTube and the Internet, there's
there's definitely people that have written about like how to
get momentum. You can do targeted ads on Facebook, for example.
So Facebook is even though Facebook is the devil, it's
still if you're trying to get your message out there,
you can do like people in Australia who are who
are listening to podcasts, who like Scrubs, who like interview, know,

(01:14:04):
you can really narrow the hell out of it down
in between these ages and just send ads to them. Um,
you know, so you can get clever with you know,
I don't really know much about it, but I know
that if you dig deep on the internet, I'm sure
there's YouTube videos where people give tutorials for like clever ways.
If you spend a little bit of money, um, just
on on really specifically targeting the people that you want

(01:14:26):
to reach. Yeah for sure. Um yeah, I know. I'm
gonna show a fan of this show for a long
time and it's it's actually really really nice to hear
some of your autels say that luck you might have
fan anime. And is it okay if I give a
shadd to the guy who put me onto this podcast
about so my good friend Dave. He um he said

(01:14:48):
to me, he said, like, you know, you love the
Scrubs as much as all they're doing a podcast? I what?
And he showed me and after episode one. I've binged
season two I one and two in about three days,
so you know, that's wow, that's a lot of hours.
I'll do too. I'm a shift worker in the mind,
so we get twelve hour shifts. So you know, you've
got to know while you're operating gear, you have to

(01:15:08):
keep your mind occupied somehow. You said you're mine, you
go back, what do you mind? Married the lead? As
we say in the newspaper industry, that I'm that, I'm
not a partner. So on. So just in that TV
episode it is Tuesday this week, I'll send you the link. Um.
So I work in a calm one. Um. So I
operate the big hall trucks. Um So in terms of feet,

(01:15:29):
you're about twenty seven feet in the Yeah, these are
those giant trucks with tires that are like definitely over compensating.
Um it's um, it's um. It's good fun. But yeah,
it's twelve hour shifts and it's its own micro community.
So you have to find ways to to entertain yourself
while you're operating and stuff. So you're you're driving that

(01:15:51):
truck and hauling coal for twelve hour shifts nights, day
and nights. Yep. Fucking hell. And you're allowed, Thank god,
you're allowed to listen things, right, yeah, if you show
otherwise it's um it's very limited AM radio stations and
you hear the weather about a thousand times a shift.
How do you pee or pooh oh? I'll just pull
up on the side of the dump and whip it

(01:16:12):
over the deck. You know, what about? What about when
you went about when you have to pooh oh? There's
crip hoots. You just cool up the dispatch office and
you roll in there and do your business and get
down at you and I guess, okay, so you drive,
you drive up and then you climb down and pooh yeah.
So they give you two breaks through the shift as well,
so you know, you know, you have to have fatigue.

(01:16:32):
I'm drinking so much water lately that I have to
pee like all the time, right doal? Yeah? Oh my god.
I was driving yesterday. I had to do a long
drive and I was like, I really wish I had
one of those little driving urnals because I would have.
I had this moment where I had my giant This
is what happened, right, I was late going to this
appointment and it was far away. I didn't know how

(01:16:53):
far away. It was so fucking far, and I'm late,
and you know when your bladder is like painful, but
you're like, come on, bro, you can go twenty more minute.
And I had to. If I was shooting the scene.
I had my my giant water drug thing that's like
two leaders, it's it's it's it's half full, and it's
sitting on the passenger seat and I did like the
slow turn to it, and I was like, I could
piss in my water jug. I really could. And I

(01:17:16):
was like I was, and I'm like, but I drink
out of that. I'm like, you're an asterile. We're gonna
wash it. You're obviously not gonna keep drinking it. Come on, Zach.
And I was like, no, I don't want to insult.
It's like my friend, I'm with him all day. It's
like my little R two D two. I'm not going
to piss in his mouth. It Oh my god, what,
oh my god, what, oh my gosh, are you kidding me? What?

(01:17:39):
How dare you p and R two's mouth? How dare
you even talk about this? Simile? It was a simile.
I said like, are you fucking kidding me? Dude? I'm sorry.
I has had a bit of a toilet file as
well a few days ago. If you want to know, well,
if you can, you tell it in a non disgusting way.

(01:18:01):
From it. It's not disgusting. We don't want anyone tuning
out because of your disgusting. Now, it's not that's I'll
run it because I did him a business and then
I had to clean it up. So I'm using the
toilet brushed to do that. As I'm are you disgusting?
As I'm doing that, I was sneezed, sazed. They would
have almost blind a hole through the wall. And as
it did that, the toilet brush head snapped off and

(01:18:22):
started to float down the bowl. Had to go get
a new toilet brush. That Snaze customer nineteen dollars. It
was ridiculous. Wait, what did you do with the toilet brush?
I fished out with a new toilet brush. Oh my god,

(01:18:42):
it's so fucking g Yeah. The name of the podcast
is Life's a mitch y'all. Well, you are funny, Mitch.
I gotta tell you you're you're you're you're very funny.
You're making me laugh, and um, I know you work
your ass off in the mine and I know that
you aspire, I imagine to have this podcast being successful

(01:19:03):
enough that you wouldn't have to do that anymore. And
I can tell you that I honestly you've made the
four of us laugh, you know, ten times since you've
been on, So I see good things in your future. Everybody.
The podcast, if you haven't been listening, is Life's a Mitch.
You can find it on Spotify, on Apple and where else,
and listen Australians in particular, you need to support your

(01:19:27):
one of your countrymen. Who's Who's Who's got a new hustle.
He's trying to get out of the mine and into
the podcast world and it sounds like he's off too
a great start. So check out Life's a Mitch. Ladies
and gentlemen, give it up for Mitch Kelly. Ye alight, Mitch,

(01:19:48):
good luck and thanks for coming on, my friend. Thank
you appreciate it. Dude. We did it. We freaking did it.
We did it. What a good show. What should we
tell the people? Thank you all for listening? By I
watch that Ron Funcius video you you sent me of
him talking to his fans on his podcast, and it's delightful.

(01:20:09):
He's so he's like a big teddy bear, that guy.
It's like, I hope that you are happy. I hope
that you have love. I hope that's so feel love. Yeah, so, um,
we love you. Steal from Ron Funciss. We love you.
We hope that you're happy, and we hope that you
feel loved. Also check out Ron Funcis NUNCHI do you
know what it's called. I don't, but you know, promote

(01:20:31):
something without telling people what it's called. I could tell
you that Ron Funches is doing it. I know that. Yeah,
well Joel is gonna type it in right now. It's
called getting Better with Ron Funches. Get check out Getting
Better with Ron Funches. Also, you know, we don't promote
a lot of podcasts on our podcast, but we just
met We just met Mitch who blew our minds. So

(01:20:52):
life's a Mitch. Please check it out. Check that out.
And then getting Better with Ron Funches. Please check that
out because we love and he's a great person and
very inspirational. Yeah, and um, that's it. We'll see you
next week, and thank you as always for tuning in.
We appreciate the camaraderie and the friendship. And now we're

(01:21:13):
gonna close out with a song called Closer by Joshua Rading.
Uh Me and Donald love a lot of Joshua's music,
but this is one of my favorites. Here's closer. So
we're alone again, Oh shoe off. We seem to only

(01:21:37):
get closer to a point where I can take the
clowns in your eyes down your face. Bone. You be
the new one, pantin. I take the blue once every

(01:22:03):
time walk me down your broken light. Oh you have
to do is cry you saw? You have to do
is cry? Hush my baby? Now you talkings just nice

(01:22:26):
and won't lay me down amongst your times in a
room where I can take no more the clouds in
your rights down your face, spart wal you be the

(01:22:51):
new one, burnt to shine. Take the blue once every time,
walk me down your broken lighte Ah, you have to
do a scry, you saw you have to do a scry.

(01:23:13):
Foot cross sound, brightly colored paper are your mas. You
are in the escaper that is our life. We walk
right into the strife and the tear from your eye
brings me home. Won't you be the new one burnt

(01:23:36):
to shine? I'll take the blue once every time walk
me down your broken life. All you have to do
a scry

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The Nikki Glaser Podcast

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}419: My Best Laid Plans