January 5, 2024 • 58 mins
When you think about your life and ask, "Am I happy with how things are? Am I content with the life I have right now?" Do you say yes? It's tough to figure out what's just right for us without settling and feeling too complacent. We want to keep moving forward. In this episode, Jen and Jill walk us into the journey of contentment and share ways to use it as a tool to spend less and with intentionality.
🎙️ Get full show notes here!
https://bit.ly/3vh2hPN
💌 Want to save money and spend better in just 5 minutes?
https://www.frugalfriendspodcast.com/friendletter
📑 Get our FREE Modern Frugal Living eBook here!
https://www.frugalfriendspodcast.com/ebook
📣 Submit your bill of the week and get a shoutout from us
https://www.frugalfriendspodcast.com/bill-of-the-week/
💸 Check out our monthly challenge community
http://www.frugalfriendspodcast.com/club
👉🏼 Subscribe for more on YouTube
https://www.youtube.com/frugalfriends
💃🏼 Hang out with us on Instagram!
https://www.instagram.com/frugalfriendspodcast/
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Episode three sixty nine, How to be content without being complacent.
Speaker 2 (00:09):
Welcome to the Frugal Friends podcast, where you'll learn to
save money, embrace simplicity and life. Here your hosts Jen
and Jill.
Speaker 1 (00:26):
Welcome to the Frugal Friends podcast. My name is Jen,
my name is Jill, and today we are talking about
contentment and not in a way that makes you feel like, oh, yeah,
I can just forget and ignore everything else going on
around me or everything I'm capable of because I'm content,
(00:47):
but how we can use it as a tool to
spend less while almost giving ourselves this responsible feeling to
live into our full capacity.
Speaker 3 (01:01):
It's this holding the tension between two things that finding
the radical middle of I'm still moving forward and doing things,
but also not inter rat race and know what is
enough for me and can find contentment without stagnation. I
(01:23):
think we're all on a journey in this, but it's
such a good aim and we hope to kind of
cover some of the basics and how we can aim
at this.
Speaker 1 (01:33):
Yeah, because this is a chapter in our book that
we're writing, and so we wanted to do a full
episode on it, just the two of us, to really
talk about how this plays into values based spending, how
it plays into your earning, your relationships, all of that.
But first let's get to the important stuff. This episode
is brought to you by three seconds. I'm going to
(01:56):
give you three seconds to stop what you're doing and
go sign up for the friend letter. I know you've
been meaning to do it, you just haven't gotten the
chance because as soon as I'm done talking, we go
right into the content and we don't give you the chance.
And that's on us. So today you get three seconds
of uninterrupted silence. You can pause the show, head to
(02:19):
frugalfriendspodcast dot com and go sign up for the friend letter. Ready, go,
and we're back. Okay, we're back.
Speaker 3 (02:34):
Hopefully editor doesn't take out those three seconds.
Speaker 1 (02:39):
Hopefully it stays early enough in the show that maybe
he's still listening and hasn't just skipped forward. Probably not.
Apologies if that wasn't three seconds. Anyways, we'll make a
note in the show and the show outline if contentment
and gratitude and all of these things around and thankfulness
(03:01):
and embracing your season, these are things you're interested in.
We have several other episodes that we have done. We
have episode two forty eight Simple Money, Rich Life with
Bob and Linda Lodick. That is a really good one
about simple living in your home and leisure and in
(03:24):
your money. And then episode two fifty six using gratitude
journaling to help you spend less. So those are really good.
We also did one about embracing your season. That's another
chapter in our book that's coming out. That was episode
(03:45):
three forty two, so that one was as recent as October,
the importance of honoring your season. So these are some
good ones to queue after.
Speaker 3 (03:54):
Yeah, but stick with us because this is a unique
one in that we tip it turned to the internet.
We look at two different articles that'll be in the
top search about whatever it is that we're chatting through.
What does Google have to say about it, and what
we have to say about what Google has to say.
It's a super complicated type of podcast structure, but today
(04:19):
we're setting all that aside to just give you our
thoughts on this. Again, it's going to be in our book,
so we're practicing using our own voices and giving you
kind of the curated list and tips and ideas around
where we've come to in the last five and a
(04:41):
half years and kind of this blueprint. We totally believe
that finances personal finances are not a one size fits all,
but there are these foundational principles that are so helpful
when it comes to refining how we spend, how we save,
how we approach and understand money and move through life
(05:04):
as a result of that. And this idea of contentment
is one of those foundational principles. But yet we want
to tether it by saying also not becoming complacent, continuing
to move forward. So that's what we're talking about. That's
the direction that we're taking in this. And I think
while we said we're not going to the internet and
(05:26):
doing articles, we are going to turn to the dictionary
because why not. I think we should totally understand how
do we how are we defining contentment versus complacency? And
so to be contented if you were if you were
to google dictionary this, it's feeling or showing satisfaction with
(05:51):
one's possessions, status, or situation, and similar words to this
would be satisfied, happy, pleased. I would probably add at peace.
I think contentment leads to a peacefulness, not a hurried
or anxious, constantly feeling inside of us. Versus complacency or
(06:18):
being complacent is having or showing a lack of interest
or concern just like I don't even care. Probably probably
a bit of a fatalist mentality if we were to
relate it to anything. Some synonyms for this one include apathetic, uninterested, unconcerned,
(06:41):
just who cares whatever happens. And we're gonna aim at contented.
We're gonna aim at the satisfied, pleased, peaceful, satisfaction with
our possessions, status, situation, all of those things. And of
course money is intersecting with that.
Speaker 1 (07:03):
Yeah, I think as products of hustle culture, we want
to be grateful, right, we want to be grateful for
what we have. But it's hard to be content when
you think that your value in society, your worth in
society is equated to the output. So even if it's
(07:23):
not at work, it's at home with how many things
you do with your kids, how great their lunches are,
how the status you like that you show to your friends.
It can show itself in a number of ways, right,
It's not all or nothing. So we want to look
at the places where we are not content and kind
(07:48):
of examine those things and think about how can I
get there and what role does money play? So when
you're content, it's you acknowledge two things. The first is
you don't need more stuff. You don't need different stuff,
You don't need new places to be happy. Contentment is
(08:08):
the synonym for happy, it's the synonym for joy. So
the things that you have are going to bring you joy.
When you pay off debt, when you have savings in
the bank, those things do not inherently bring joy. I've
seen a ton of people pay off their debt and afterwards,
(08:31):
you know, the couples get divorced. I've seen people retire
early and then head back to the workforce because they
meet these goals that they are told is the secret
to contentment. Early retirement, debt, freedom, paid off house, whatever,
that these are what you need before you can be
(08:53):
fully happy or or just realize your full potential. Right
in reality, these are not the things that are going
to do that for you. You have to be content and
happy and joyful and realize your full potential now. And
these are just things that will We'll expound on it.
(09:16):
So when you're content, you realize you don't need the
financial goals and you don't need to buy more stuff,
or renovate in a different way, or travel to all
the places that you're going to. It saves you money
in that way and then the other. This may be
even part three. I guess this may be a c.
(09:37):
You also acknowledge the hard work you've put in to
improve your spending, to say no to more stuff when
your friends are to say no to certain types of
travel because they don't suit you, or to say yes
to certain types of travel when other people are not.
And you celebrate these accomplishments, and you let them inspire
(09:58):
you to keep moving. You realize what you are capable of.
You realize that you are You're not just floating through
life buying the next thing, living paycheck to paycheck, just
kind of floating through life. You're achieving things. And sometimes
we think that other people are doing it, so we
(10:19):
should be able to do it too. And I am
so guilty of this. Every time I accomplish something, I
never celebrate it. I'm always like, well, somebody else is
doing it better, so I got to get to where
they're at. Contentment shows satisfaction. It's not just feeling, it's showing.
So you are also in addition to saving the money,
(10:42):
and knowing that the goals and the spending won't make
you happy. You're also showing up and celebrating yourself and
learning and learning new ways to achieve more, to figure
out new ways to live into your full potential.
Speaker 3 (11:05):
Yeah, I'm realizing we could be on either end of
the spectrum, Like, complacency isn't the only option of where
we could find ourselves. We could find ourselves on the
complete opposite end of the spectrum, with that hustle, that
grind that I've got to keep going and do the
next thing before we even pause to consider. But where
(11:28):
does my contentment lie? And then when you're complacent just
kind of okay, las a fair who cares what happens next?
Probably this would coincide with ideas that things won't ever
get better for me, scarcity, mindset, these kinds of things.
So we could find ourselves on either end. And so
(11:49):
contentment is holding the tension between those two things where
we're not hustling to a point where we are lacking
mindfulness and intentionality, but we're also not experiencing this degree
of complacency either, holding the tension in that way.
Speaker 1 (12:07):
Yeah, so let's expand on the these two pieces, the
A and the B. Now I'm just saying it might
be a C, but we're gonna I wrote it in
the outline as an A and a B, so we're
going to expand on those. So the first contentment you
don't need more stuff, different stuff, is essentially contentment with
(12:29):
what you own and do, and then the part B
will be contentment with who you are and what you've done.
So the first part, though, is contentment with what you
own and what you do. So people on social media
or around you may be telling you that the next
new thing or vacation will make you happier. I know
(12:50):
millennials we value experiences more than things, but there comes
a point where only so many vacations will add value
to your life. Vacations, traveling, and you know, working abroad,
all that stuff. That's also not the true key to happiness. Uh.
(13:13):
It's making sure that you are indulging in the experiences
and having the experiences that are truly who you are,
not what other people are telling you to be. So
understanding that the places you go or the new things
you buy won't make you happier. The only things that
(13:37):
the only things that will truly make you happier are
the things money can't buy. And we've said that over
and over again, right, So, like, what are the things
money can't buy? They are the four fs. We think
they're faith, family, friends, and fulfilling work. And that fulfilling
work is professional and non professional, so either you're philanthropy
(14:01):
or your professional life. They don't have to be the same,
is the thing. Also, sometimes we think we have to
do fulfilling work, like we have to do our passion
as work. But you can have fulfilling work that is
professional that pays you income, and fulfilling work that is
non professional that may not pay you an income. So
(14:21):
these are this is kind of like the baseline for
being content is having these things that you know money
can't buy. Because new things bring joy, they do for
a short time and they're great. But we want to
focus on the vital few, the real the heavy hitters.
(14:45):
We talk about the eighty twenty principle and saving money,
Like we've got the vital few, and this is a
topic that we're gonna talk more about in twenty twenty four.
Twenty percent of your actions result in eighty percent the outcomes. Right,
it's the same with your experiences and your contentment. Twenty
(15:09):
percent of these things that money can't buy are going
to bring you eighty percent of your contentment. And so
it's finding what for you are these heavy hitters that
are really going to bring you joy for the long
term that you really want to invest in, and those
are they're not going to cost money, but it is
(15:29):
going to take money for you to be able to
experience them. So we don't forget about the income and
increasing the margin between income and expenses, but really look
at those things that are going to bring you the
most contentment.
Speaker 3 (15:47):
The next category that we can look at in shaping
where we are experiencing contentment is with who we are
and what we've done. I think this is probably contentment
two point zero. It certainly can take us some time
to get to a place of contentment with what we
(16:08):
own and what we do, but I think this is
a deeper level of reconciling who we are, our personhood,
our personalities, the things that we've done and accomplished. And
I don't think that this is easily come by, and
I think there can be a lot of barriers. This
experience can ebb and flow. But when we can find
(16:31):
contentment at that deeper internal level, It too will have
some really phenomenal impacts, certainly on our lives, our lifestyles,
and our finances. I think being content with yourself and
who you are and what you've done has so much
(16:51):
to do with contentment in our seasons, acknowledging the parts
of the time that we're in currently that might limit
us and be able to look for beauty in it,
and the ways that the season helps you rather than
hurts you. I think we can often play that comparison
(17:11):
game of looking at what we don't have because we
see what others have around us, whether it's social media,
people in our community, are close friends, maybe family, doesn't matter.
Wherever we look, there's opportunities to see, Oh they're able
to do this, but I can't because XYZ and this
(17:32):
is a call to shift our focus to what's actually
within our control. All of us can have this propensity
to focus on the things that give the most of
our time, energy and attention to the things that are
outside of our control that we don't have influence over,
rather than what's inside of our control that we can
shift and change. And similar when it comes to gratitude,
(17:56):
being able to look at but what do I have
as a result of this season? Jen, I know you've
talked about like an example of having young kids. We're
just talking about this over coffee the other day. Yeah, yeah,
I mean you speak for yourself. I mean, no, exactly
what you said.
Speaker 1 (18:15):
This is. This is what I'm going through right now,
is that I have a lot of friends that don't
have kids, and I'm looking at them and I'm getting
down because I'm like, these people can do all this
stuff that I can't. And I know full well if
I did not have kids, that I would be looking
at my friends that did have kids and being envious
(18:37):
of them having what I want. So there's always going
to be this creeping grass is green on the other side, right,
and and we're going to talk about that too. But
like they the finding like acknowledging your entire season, right,
not just the parts that are beautiful, but the parts
(18:58):
that limit you, and still looking for beauty in that.
So my kids, like they're expensive, they delay me from
going out at night or ever. It's all like very
If I focus on that, it's very depressing, right, Like
(19:18):
I want to go out, I want to do these things.
I want to have more opportunities like to go to
conferences and to do stuff in the business, and I'm
just not in a season where i can do that.
But it's still a beautiful time with them because They're
never going to be this young ever again. I'm never
(19:40):
going to have kids this young ever again, because we're
done having kids, and there we are teaching them to
be members of society and teaching them lessons that we
didn't necessarily get when we were younger. So there is
(20:00):
there are these beautiful things, but I think we're maybe
told just focus on the beautiful things. There's a lot
of there's a lot of extremes on social media. It's
either focus on all the beautiful things or dwell on
all the sucky things. And I think I might have
gotten on dwell on all the sucky things algorithm. But
(20:24):
there is a radical middle in it, and that's where
contentment is found. It's not the delusion that everything is
great and everything is worth being grateful for. It's just
really acknowledgment and choosing to choosing to look on the
(20:45):
bright side as much as you look at the realities.
Speaker 3 (20:49):
Every choice is going to have an opportunity cost to it.
There's always going to be consequences to the path that
we've chosen, which I think can be really hopeful that that, oh,
we can make decisions from here on out that we
feel are going to benefit us and not stay stuck
(21:09):
in the things that decisions we may have made in
the past that now we're seeing ough this didn't benefit
me as much as I had hoped. I think personally
I can struggle with this at times. With the career
path that I chose. I chose to go into social work.
I spent fifteen years in that profession and was able
(21:34):
to accomplish some really beautiful things, but do not have
much to show for it in the bank. And I
think I can get in these moments of man look
at where all these other people are at at this
stage of life in their mid thirties to forties, and
they they're really established in their careers, and they've been
able to increase their income and within the field that
(21:57):
I was that I've been in, it just hasn't been
as exponential as who I am choosing to look at, right,
It also has to do with who are you choosing
to compare to, But then at the same time being
able to recognize there's choices that I made, and none
of it comes without a degree of sacrifice. But to
also recognize for me personally, I wouldn't change any of
(22:20):
it either. I am so grateful for the experiences that
I've had in the field. Is what it has produced
in me, my outlook on life, my understanding of the
world around me, what it has led me to today.
And I think that's going to be the exercise of
constantly looking at that, but then again not the complacency
(22:41):
piece of what can I do going forward so that
I can feel really good in the next ten to
fifteen years as I look back on what I chose
now to be doing with my time, energy resources, how
can I be stewarding them to the best of my ability?
And I think content with your season in that way
(23:02):
and yourself, it helps you to be able to acknowledge
what you're good at, like what you enjoy, versus what
drains you, looking at ways to do more of those
things and less of the others. I think that too,
has been helpful for me in my own career path
chosen of Yeah, but this is what I was good
at and this is what was life giving to me,
(23:24):
And yeah, sure there's sacrifices to it, but there's sacrifices
to the person who has made six figures every year
straight out of college. Like nothing is ever exactly how
it seems to the thing that we're comparing it to.
And so we can lean into and recognize what's my season,
who am I, what am I good at, what's life giving,
(23:46):
what's depleting? And do more of the things that are
life giving less of the things that are depleting.
Speaker 1 (23:53):
Yeah, I think it's it's a vicious cycle because I
think complacency can come out of if we are trying
to be content with what others find joy in instead
of what we find joy in, then we can create
this attitude of apathy because other people may like for me,
(24:14):
I hate dishes, but I love meal planning. Other people
hate meal planning, but they love cooking. So I personally,
I'll make these beautiful meal plans, but I make sure
they are as few dishes as possible, they are as
simple as possible. I spend a little more for pre
chopped frozen veggies, but I still say because I'm following
(24:37):
through with my meal plan, because I'm making I'm doing
more of what I'm good at, and what I find
joy in versus what people on social media who have
their entire career around like cooking or maybe just like
enjoy it more. I see these moms with like six
kids and they're always making these delicious meals. It's not me,
(25:00):
But I can still find joy in this process by
focusing on what I am better at, what I find
more joy in. A question that we get a lot
is like, how do you almost how do you find
joy in becoming frugal? Right? Because spending money is fun.
Doing stuff is fun, not quote quote unquote not doing
(25:23):
stuff is not fun. And how do you focus on
these long term goals? You find your why? How do
you focus on your why for doing this stuff that
is seemingly hard? Is that is realistically hard? Is that
you have to find joy in the day to day.
(25:43):
You have to find the things that bring you joy.
You have to find the things that you are good at,
you love. Because when you create a frugal lifestyle that
you enjoy living, then it's not a means to an end.
Then you're not looking for enjoy and spending money when
you're still living a frugal life and you would rather
(26:06):
be spending money, and you are bummed that you cannot
go out and go shopping or do the expensive hobbies.
You haven't found joy in your why and so there
that just comes with practice, and it comes with a
lot of introspection, and I mean it will be, It
(26:30):
will happen. You just have to keep going with it
and learning more about Okay, these are the things that
I don't like. These are the things I'm going to
lay down. These are the things that I'm okay with.
They don't really bother me, so they get to stay.
And then these are the things I really love. These
are the things I really enjoy day today, and they
(26:51):
also help me get closer to my financial goals. They
also help me spend less or earn more. These are
the places you want to spend your focus on. These
are the places that when you invest in them, they
are going to help you enjoy your frugal lifestyle and
be content.
Speaker 3 (27:12):
I think considering all of these things is an investment
in ourselves and the long term of life. Again, this
isn't the how exactly should I arrange my budget? This
is the what do I want out of life? What
do I want to be giving and receiving? And what
makes me tick, what lights me up. It doesn't again
(27:36):
have to be the exact job that you're doing. You
could keep the job that you're doing and find these
things outside of it. But this is the deeper work
that is going to mold and shape and shift a
life of knowing what's enough of being content, which then
helps us have more informed spending patterns, ways of managing money,
(28:01):
not just kind of going after whatever is right before us,
because we haven't yet discovered what it is that we enjoy,
what it is that makes us tick, So we're kind
of just grasping at anything that someone might tell us
and spending money on it and kind of on.
Speaker 1 (28:19):
That not so helpful beneficial cycle. So what do we
do when complacency starts to creep in? Because you can't
care one hundred percent of the time. I see all
the time on like how to pay off debt articles?
What's the first thing you do? Number one is always
find your whye. Number two is always make a budget.
(28:40):
And I'll just tell you that's the that's the top
half of every article about that. But like you can't
care about your why all the time, It's impossible, Like
sometimes you're just going to be apathetic about the journey.
Whatever you're trying to do, whether it's safer retirement, payoff debt,
get your finances on track, you cannot care one hundred
(29:03):
percent of the time, so don't try. So what do
we do when complacency starts to creep in? We refocus
ourselves on contentment and that's where active gratitude comes in.
It is not the one hundred percent solution, but it
is one highly effective thing that you can do to
(29:27):
reorient yourself back to contentment. So the definition of thankful
or grateful is the conscious is being conscious of the
benefit received. So basically, you can't be happy about things
you haven't acknowledged yet. That's why it's so important that
(29:47):
the second part of contentment is recognizing and being satisfied
with your accomplishments, with where you're at. So you can't
be happy about things that you haven't acknowledged. So really
showing gratitude, gratitude, journaling, gratitude, meditation, however you want to
practice it, it is simply acknowledging benefit benefits that have
(30:12):
been received. So I would say if you're in a
slump with your no spend January, if you are in
a slump with your debt payoff. Then for two weeks,
shift your focus to gratitude journaling. So make it a
(30:33):
priority every day for two weeks to be doing some
sort of short gratitude journaling. And essentially that is just
acknowledging benefits received that day, anything you received that day
that is positive. Uh So, being and doing this challenge
(30:58):
knowing that it has an end and it's a short
and we're not doing like a thirty day gratitude challenge
just two weeks or maybe even one week. It causes you, like,
I know, at the end of the day, I'm going
to have to write down what I'm thankful for, like
what good things happen to me today. It makes you
away during the day because you're paying attention so that
you can write it down, either when it happens or
(31:20):
at night. When we don't look for things, we don't
find them. When we look for things, we find them.
So the things that are going to happen to you
are going to happen to you, regardless of whether you're
looking for them or not. It's training our mind or
resetting our mind simply to focus on the good. It's
(31:40):
because it's so much easier to focus on the negative.
We know that, and we forget to focus on the
good stuff. So when you feel like you are in
a slump, and this can be in anything, but especially
with when you have to say no to spending money
on something or you're just feel really apathetic about paying
(32:01):
off your debt, try this for two weeks and see
how transformative it is for your feeling of contentment.
Speaker 3 (32:13):
Yeah, and I think we can know when we're approaching
complacency by certainly how it feels inside of us and
what we see showing up in our lives. I think
that complacency, knowing when this is creeping in, it will
probably feel like stagnation, maybe feelings of being stuck, or
(32:35):
that I don't know if I can care about this anymore.
I don't know if I can actually shift the needle
on this thing anymore. Like that debt pay off example
that you gave, Jen, I think it's at those points
which we're going to have to keep a pulse on this.
We have to be doing regular check ins with ourselves
as well to even know if we're hitting a place
(32:57):
of complacency on any given aspect of our lives. And
it's okay to reach that point, but then what we're
going to do about it?
Speaker 1 (33:07):
Then?
Speaker 3 (33:07):
What what are we going to do about it? I
do also think that we need to keep a pulse
on when we are hustling too much as well. I
think this can be a place a lot of us
find ourselves, is if I just do this extra, extra,
extra thing and it's backbreaking to us. And I think
(33:28):
we can know when that's happening by feelings of overwhelmed,
feelings of not being enough, feelings of just sheer exhaustion maybe,
And that's when we can also be saying, how can
I pull in the reins here? I do think that
that gratitude journaling is going to help in both directions,
(33:52):
because what it also does is creates a mindfulness about
our space, our current season, how we are moving through life,
which can give us a clearer focus and aim on
what's actually worth my time and energy right now and
reevaluate and come to a new place of reset. Okay, yes,
(34:17):
I do want to keep moving forward with this thing
that I have set out to do because I am
reattached to my why again and so just taking this
pulse and gratitude thankfulness, checking in with yourself is going
to be what helps to move the needle on that.
(34:39):
But at the same time, will achieving the next financial
goal make you content? Now spoiler alert, Now it doesn't
like keep we keep reaching different goals. And I know
you said, Jen, you have a really hard time celebrating.
You're just kind of like onto the next thing, which
I think a lot of us can commiserate with. And
(35:01):
there is this concept of the hedonic adaptation that states
once we achieve something, we return to a relative state
of happiness or whatever baseline homeostasis we were at before
that we're kind of now this is the new level.
I think this is lifestyle creep has to do with
(35:24):
this that oh, if I just get that promotion, that
new job, if I'm just in this other house, and
yet the reality is, yeah, that's great. We're not saying again,
don't be complacent if you want to take hold of
the next thing. That's how we know we're alive because
we're moving forward and we're doing new things. But we
(35:46):
will adjust. Then you get that higher paying job, you
get that raise, and now your expenses can start to increase,
and now you just need more and more and more.
It doesn't have to be that way, but untethered and unchecked.
That's the direction it can go. And so understanding that
(36:09):
any one of these goals or accomplishments isn't going to
be the end all be all in and of itself,
it's worth aiming at, but that is not what's going
to lead to ultimate contentment. It is going to be
those things that money can't buy. And I think that
this happens when we've learned how to master our spending
(36:30):
and achieving your financial goals, knowing that it's not going
to make you happier or satisfied, but it will lead
to greater levels of contentment when we feel like we're
the ones truly in control making the informed, insightful decisions
about our money.
Speaker 1 (36:52):
Yeah, we talked about it earlier, but the four fs,
Faith in whatever you have, family, friends, your chosen family,
and then fulfilling work, the things that where you feel
like you're contributing to this world in some way you
(37:16):
are in whatever way you feel good about. It doesn't
always have to be in a nonprofit or in some
kind of like way. That's I don't know. It doesn't
always have to be giving money places and volunteering at
soup kitchens, right, It can be anything that makes you
feel like you're making an impact in your community, you're
(37:37):
leaving the plate, the world a better place than you
found it. Like, these are the things that we are
really aiming at, and these are the reasons that we
choose values based spending. These are the these are the
things that are going to bring us joy in values
based spending. Like I can say no to this thing
(37:57):
that I have realized now that I don't care about
as much because I have found these things that I
care so much more about and I just didn't get
to uncover them until I took time to stop just
running on the hamster wheel. So that's really we want
(38:18):
contentment to inspire you to pursue these things more, to
pursue stronger relationships with the people in your life, to
pursue more impact in your community, more impact in your
child's lives, in their friends' lives. So all of these
things are beautiful things to pursue. And there are things
(38:40):
that can be realized very immediately. Sometimes we define this
why and you know, why are you paying off debt?
Why are you saving for early retirement? And there are
things that are so far off into the future, but
impact like based these four fs are very very near
(39:01):
to you. You can have an impact, and you can
build strong relationships, and you can grow stronger in faith.
You can do all of these very immediately. And so
these are the things that we replace with the instant
gratification of a quick like what a quick purchase at
Target can get you. It is probably the most even replacement.
(39:26):
So when you feel like you are bored and you
want to go shopping somewhere, instead of you know, jumping
straight to oh, I should probably just like gratitude journal
because that's I know, that's what you really want to do. False,
that's what I've never wanted to do. Instead, look at
these things that are the things you want that money
(39:48):
can't buy, and start to think of ways start now
making less of like how can I get more of these?
How can I build these things that I truly want.
We've talked about Massow's hierarchy of needs quite a bit,
and at the top, at the bottom, it's all your
core needs, right your shelter, your food, your safety, your
(40:10):
sense of safety. At the top, though, it is all
the self actualization and the respect and the connection. Look
at ways that you can get more of that because
that's what you really want, and that's what these for fs.
They bring you those things that you really want that
money can't buy. So when you're thinking why am I,
(40:35):
you know, why am I feeling apathetic? And may be
because you're pursuing things that are not the things at
the top of your hierarchy of needs, the things that
you want most.
Speaker 3 (40:47):
So well said, I think too, it's worth stating that
in the midst of this, we can also combat the
fear that increasing our lifestyle will lead to a destruct
to spiral. I think again, that's the pushing back against
a certain type of complacency of well, I need to
(41:07):
just stay here at this level of income or this
type of location, because if I do anything different, then
that's going to mean I'm not being content. And I think, yeah,
we can push back on that too, to say we
can we can aim for something as long as it's informed,
as long as we know this is what we want.
(41:28):
We've done that deeper work, we've done the gratitude journaling,
we've dug into the four FS, and we don't have
to fear that, oh, I am not going to be
able to be in control of myself anymore if I
get this next thing, everything's just going to spiral out
of control. That's not true either. No matter what we
(41:50):
achieve next, it won't be our ultimate happiness, but it
also won't be our ultimate destruction. So we can keep
going and be in formed as we're going and certain
that this is what I want to do. And I
am aimed at contentment along the way, at each and
(42:10):
every point when I don't have the job, when I
do have the job, when a meal plan and excellently,
when I'm not, when I'm crushing debt, and when I
need to slow down because of my season, all of
these things, no matter what the season is, we can
find contentment. And as we aim at new and different
(42:30):
and maybe increased goals within our finances and personal lives,
we can also find contentment. And do you know what
leads to my greatest contentment?
Speaker 1 (42:42):
I am content to say, yeah it is. It does
bring me true joy. It is an instant gratification, and
it's something that I don't ever have to uh pursue.
It always just comes the bill of the week.
Speaker 2 (43:10):
That's right, it's time for the best minute of your
entire week. Maybe a baby was born and his name
is Williams.
Speaker 1 (43:18):
Maybe you paid off your mortgage.
Speaker 2 (43:20):
Maybe your car died, and you're happy to not have
to pay that bill anymore. Best Bill Buffalo Bills, Bill Clon,
This is the bill of the week.
Speaker 4 (43:30):
Hi, Jenna Jel. This is Haley from Sugarland, Texas. I
recently discovered your podcast and I've really been enjoying going
back through the old episodes and finding on some content
that's helpful. My bill of the week is my student
loan bill. So when my husband and I got married
five years ago, right after I graduated from college, I
had about sixty thousand dollars in student debt, and in
(43:52):
our first free years of marriage, we took on too
carlans as well. When the payment pause happened during the pandemic,
we really prioritize paying down our debt highest interest first,
and on the very last day of the interest pause,
we paid off my last student loan. And now in
five years of marriage, we've paid off somewhere in the
(44:13):
neighborhood of eighty thousand dollars of debt and the only
debt we're caring now is our mortgage. Thanks again for
all your advice and awesome content.
Speaker 1 (44:21):
Whoo whoo oh wow. I'm doing the sounds early congratulations, Pailey.
We are going to give you all the energy that
you need from us because you didn't sound like you
(44:44):
were acknowledging your success enough, so we're going to do
it for you. Here we are.
Speaker 3 (44:50):
We're celebrating these accomplishments because my goodness, are you aiming
at some things? Five years eighty thousand dollars? Oh wow,
that took some grit. I know that had to take
some powering through complacency, lack of motivation, sacrifice, feeling like
(45:11):
you're missing out. But man, am I feeling on top
of the world with you right now? How incredible? Well,
Don Hayley, thank you so much for sharing that with us.
Speaker 1 (45:24):
Here's the thing. If you are listening to this right
now and you've paid off any amount of debt, I
don't care how long ago it was, and you've kept
it off and you've kept it paid off, I need
you to acknowledge your success in that and call in
and leave that as your bill for the week. I
need you to just head to Frugal Friends podcast dot
com slash bill tell us how much you paid off
(45:48):
and what it was, how long it took you, and
if it was a long time ago, and you kept
it off like tell us that too, that's an accomplishment.
We forget what we are cape be love when we
do not reflect on the things that we have done,
and that stagnates us, that limits us from accomplishing more
(46:10):
in the future. So it's time for you to take
the time to call in too, Frugal friendspodcast dot com,
slash bill and leave us your bill and acknowledge your
successes so that you are motivated and inspired to have
more of them.
Speaker 3 (46:28):
That's how we practice contentment. That's how we practice gratitude.
That's how we practice giving back to the fellow Frugal
Friends community to encourage each other and celebrate your own accomplishments.
Do it, leave us your bill. We're ready for it.
And now it's time for.
Speaker 1 (46:54):
All right for the vulnerability around today. What experiences or
values do you can consider priceless and truly believe money
can't buy?
Speaker 3 (47:05):
Jill, I think money can't buy I'm going to be
the student who sits at the front of the class
right now. Money can't buy contentment. But truly, for myself,
I think this is peace and enjoyment. I have yet
(47:30):
to find something that I when I just spend money,
am I finding peace and enjoyment in life? Money intersects
with it. But what I've learned gives me This is
time with close friends and family, and time outside digging
(47:53):
in the dirt. These things are so life giving and
precious to me, and it is what cultiv It's an
enjoyment of life for me. Of course, it takes money
to be able to have some flexibility to spend the
time that I do with other people and time in
the garden. And certainly sometimes I spend money on my plants.
(48:15):
I mean, what else, what else are you going to do?
There are a core value of mine. So yeah, and
money intersects with it. But I think that that enjoyment,
that contentment, that piece, that's something that like, if you
were to just be like, just buy it, I couldn't like.
It takes these other things that can't be bought and
(48:38):
but yet are so important to my personal and internal
well being. What about for you, jen.
Speaker 1 (48:48):
H? So I'll give a recent example. Last night we
went to a friend's Christmas party because we're recording this
in December, and we brought our kids and and Atlas,
my eight month old, fell asleep on my chest and
(49:08):
it was a really like that does not happen often,
and so like I just kind of stopped socializing and
like sat down and kind of embraced it. I think
I'm trying to be present in this season of having
young children, because like when we got home from the party, Kai,
(49:29):
my four year old, screamed the whole way home that
he didn't want to leave, he wanted to go back,
and then would not let us put his pajamas on
him to go to bed, and he was just like
writhing and did not he just was up to way.
So like, it's stuff like that that is the worst
that I dwell on that I think about, and so
(49:52):
I'm actively trying to dwell on good things like a
baby be sleeping on your chest, or literally twenty minutes
later when Kai was hugging me and sale, I love you, mommy,
you know, stuff like that. So I think that's where
(50:12):
I am right now, because I'm not like a mom's mom.
I'm like not mom all the time, world's okayest mom.
I'm I'm like below that. So I'm an adequate mom
and it's not my life's passion. So I have to
(50:33):
actively seek to be present and to enjoy those things.
But I mean there's there's also a sense of like,
I get to do my fulfilling work, is my professional work.
I'm super blessed to be able to say that. It
(50:54):
is not like highly profitable like some other places. The money.
There's not a ton of money in telling people to
spend less, so go figure. I have to be like
it's sometimes I am a little bitter when I talk
to other people who are in the space and they're
(51:17):
crushing it, you know, building businesses, making a lot of
money and doing good things. But I have to actively
remind myself that I'm I get to do what I love,
and I get to talk about what I love, and
I do actually make a livable wage from doing it.
(51:37):
I I forget that when I'm focused on what other
people have and what seems to come so easily to them.
Speaker 3 (51:49):
Yeah, because the flip side of that is someone else
is guaranteed looking at you thinking, oh man, she's got this,
she's got that. And that's just the proof of why
the comparison game just isn't fruitful in any stretch and
truly like what you are practicing of Yep, there's all
(52:10):
these things and I can acknowledge them that I don't
love about this current season, but there's just as many,
if not more things I can acknowledge and choose to
focus on that are really beautiful about this stage and
this season that I'm in. And you're more than an
okay mom, Jen, you just you just do it differently
(52:35):
than what is And I don't even want to say
like then most then how motherhood has been portrayed to us,
or how some in a certain circle might be acting
out motherhood. But the reality to it is there's just
as many styles of mothering as there are mothers.
Speaker 1 (52:57):
Like this, and you're all going to do.
Speaker 3 (53:00):
It in the way that you're going to do it
and the motherly instinct that you're going to follow that's
right for your children.
Speaker 1 (53:08):
Yeah, and I'm the type of mother. You've had a
lot of goldfish and Gerber puffs on my floor.
Speaker 3 (53:14):
Right now, and that's beautiful. And you know what, they're
going to stay there because we don't believe in food waste.
Somebody or something will eat I.
Speaker 1 (53:26):
Don't believe in food waste. My children don't have the
same beliefs.
Speaker 3 (53:30):
Thanks everyone for listening. We do hope that this has
helped to inspire some pondering about contentment how to aim
at it in your life. We also love reading your
very kind reviews. This is something we love to celebrate
and feel grateful for, and this is how we're saying
thanks by reading one recent review from Elena S. Who said,
(53:55):
so inspiring. These girls help me feel normal and motivated
well on a debt free journey. Keep up these episodes, ladies,
can't wait to hear more of your tips. I'm so
thrilled to be here to keep up motivation, help to
inspire people in what can be for a lot of
us a really long and arduous journey, especially the debt
(54:17):
free journey. There's certainly a lot of sacrifice that comes
in that particular season. I can commiserate. It took me
seven years to pay off sixty thousand dollars, which is
a very long time. It's indicative of how low my
salary was at the time. And so I'm here for
all of you. You're in your debt pay off journey,
We're here for you. Yes, thank you so much for listening.
(54:40):
If you enjoyed the show, please take a minute to
leave a rating or review on Spotify or Apple. It
helps potential new listeners know what the show is all about.
If there was a particular episode like this one that
really spoke to you, call it out in the review.
Let people know what episodes are your favorites, so they
know which wants to tune into first.
Speaker 1 (55:02):
Yeah, that's good, See you next time. Google Friends is
produced by Eric Sirianni. So where oh it's no spend January,
(55:29):
Yes it is. Okay, we all wear that we're not
recording this in January. But I have a no spend
tip or no spend story that I will be using
in January.
Speaker 3 (55:44):
Cool cool, cool cool.
Speaker 1 (55:47):
So my kid Kai needs booster se and I didn't.
I bought new car seats infant and regular, but I
was like, booster seat, I can get that used. So
I've been looking and I was like, maybe I could
get it for free. So what I did was that
(56:11):
I posted a rug that I no longer need that
I was just going to get rid of for free.
I posted that on Facebook Marketplace for forty bucks and waited,
and somebody finally, you know, paid me thirty dollars for
the rug. And so then I turned around and I
went to the booster seat section on Facebook marketplace, and
(56:35):
I found a lady who had three brand new booster
seats that she was selling for twenty dollars each, and
I said, hey, would you accept thirty thirty dollars for
two of those seats and she said yes. So I
basically got two booster seats for free because I was
just going to put that old rug like a curpoler
(56:57):
and they're brand new.
Speaker 3 (56:59):
And you need to for eventually when Atlas.
Speaker 1 (57:01):
Needs one, No, I need one for my mom's car.
Well I was only gonna get one, but I got
two because we already have one, so we'll have then
Atlas will use the car seat that's in my mom's car,
and then each car will have a.
Speaker 3 (57:19):
Booster perfect well done. I love that no spend January
doesn't mean no.
Speaker 1 (57:29):
Spend, no buyo. I mean no by faults. It doesn't
mean that.
Speaker 3 (57:35):
Just like if you can make it a wash, that's creative,
that's solving problemsoh ooh, I.
Speaker 1 (57:45):
Like yeah, So, I mean what it was is just
like I just had to wait for a little bit.
I had to think in advance, like, Okay, we are
gonna need booster seats in the next month, so what's
one thing I can sell to that you know, might
make some money. And that was that.
Speaker 3 (58:05):
Rug I like, I like it.
Speaker 1 (58:08):
I also posted a weight bench, so I posted two
things that I was like, whatever one sells, that's what
I'll use. The weight bench has not sold.
Speaker 3 (58:18):
A little bit of patience, No, oh that keep that
weight bench because it's January. January is around the corner
for us right now. Everyone's gonna be like, yeah, I'm
doing it, I'm exercising.
Speaker 1 (58:34):
But I mean, if you want to exercise, Facebook Marketplace
is a great place to get a weight bene in Yep.
Episode three sixty nine, How to be content without being complacent.
Speaker 2 (00:09):
Welcome to the Frugal Friends podcast, where you'll learn to
save money, embrace simplicity and life. Here your hosts Jen
and Jill.
Speaker 1 (00:26):
Welcome to the Frugal Friends podcast. My name is Jen,
my name is Jill, and today we are talking about
contentment and not in a way that makes you feel like, oh, yeah,
I can just forget and ignore everything else going on
around me or everything I'm capable of because I'm content,
(00:47):
but how we can use it as a tool to
spend less while almost giving ourselves this responsible feeling to
live into our full capacity.
Speaker 3 (01:01):
It's this holding the tension between two things that finding
the radical middle of I'm still moving forward and doing things,
but also not inter rat race and know what is
enough for me and can find contentment without stagnation. I
(01:23):
think we're all on a journey in this, but it's
such a good aim and we hope to kind of
cover some of the basics and how we can aim
at this.
Speaker 1 (01:33):
Yeah, because this is a chapter in our book that
we're writing, and so we wanted to do a full
episode on it, just the two of us, to really
talk about how this plays into values based spending, how
it plays into your earning, your relationships, all of that.
But first let's get to the important stuff. This episode
is brought to you by three seconds. I'm going to
(01:56):
give you three seconds to stop what you're doing and
go sign up for the friend letter. I know you've
been meaning to do it, you just haven't gotten the
chance because as soon as I'm done talking, we go
right into the content and we don't give you the chance.
And that's on us. So today you get three seconds
of uninterrupted silence. You can pause the show, head to
(02:19):
frugalfriendspodcast dot com and go sign up for the friend letter. Ready, go,
and we're back. Okay, we're back.
Speaker 3 (02:34):
Hopefully editor doesn't take out those three seconds.
Speaker 1 (02:39):
Hopefully it stays early enough in the show that maybe
he's still listening and hasn't just skipped forward. Probably not.
Apologies if that wasn't three seconds. Anyways, we'll make a
note in the show and the show outline if contentment
and gratitude and all of these things around and thankfulness
(03:01):
and embracing your season, these are things you're interested in.
We have several other episodes that we have done. We
have episode two forty eight Simple Money, Rich Life with
Bob and Linda Lodick. That is a really good one
about simple living in your home and leisure and in
(03:24):
your money. And then episode two fifty six using gratitude
journaling to help you spend less. So those are really good.
We also did one about embracing your season. That's another
chapter in our book that's coming out. That was episode
(03:45):
three forty two, so that one was as recent as October,
the importance of honoring your season. So these are some
good ones to queue after.
Speaker 3 (03:54):
Yeah, but stick with us because this is a unique
one in that we tip it turned to the internet.
We look at two different articles that'll be in the
top search about whatever it is that we're chatting through.
What does Google have to say about it, and what
we have to say about what Google has to say.
It's a super complicated type of podcast structure, but today
(04:19):
we're setting all that aside to just give you our
thoughts on this. Again, it's going to be in our book,
so we're practicing using our own voices and giving you
kind of the curated list and tips and ideas around
where we've come to in the last five and a
(04:41):
half years and kind of this blueprint. We totally believe
that finances personal finances are not a one size fits all,
but there are these foundational principles that are so helpful
when it comes to refining how we spend, how we save,
how we approach and understand money and move through life
(05:04):
as a result of that. And this idea of contentment
is one of those foundational principles. But yet we want
to tether it by saying also not becoming complacent, continuing
to move forward. So that's what we're talking about. That's
the direction that we're taking in this. And I think
while we said we're not going to the internet and
(05:26):
doing articles, we are going to turn to the dictionary
because why not. I think we should totally understand how
do we how are we defining contentment versus complacency? And
so to be contented if you were if you were
to google dictionary this, it's feeling or showing satisfaction with
(05:51):
one's possessions, status, or situation, and similar words to this
would be satisfied, happy, pleased. I would probably add at peace.
I think contentment leads to a peacefulness, not a hurried
or anxious, constantly feeling inside of us. Versus complacency or
(06:18):
being complacent is having or showing a lack of interest
or concern just like I don't even care. Probably probably
a bit of a fatalist mentality if we were to
relate it to anything. Some synonyms for this one include apathetic, uninterested, unconcerned,
(06:41):
just who cares whatever happens. And we're gonna aim at contented.
We're gonna aim at the satisfied, pleased, peaceful, satisfaction with
our possessions, status, situation, all of those things. And of
course money is intersecting with that.
Speaker 1 (07:03):
Yeah, I think as products of hustle culture, we want
to be grateful, right, we want to be grateful for
what we have. But it's hard to be content when
you think that your value in society, your worth in
society is equated to the output. So even if it's
(07:23):
not at work, it's at home with how many things
you do with your kids, how great their lunches are,
how the status you like that you show to your friends.
It can show itself in a number of ways, right,
It's not all or nothing. So we want to look
at the places where we are not content and kind
(07:48):
of examine those things and think about how can I
get there and what role does money play? So when
you're content, it's you acknowledge two things. The first is
you don't need more stuff. You don't need different stuff,
You don't need new places to be happy. Contentment is
(08:08):
the synonym for happy, it's the synonym for joy. So
the things that you have are going to bring you joy.
When you pay off debt, when you have savings in
the bank, those things do not inherently bring joy. I've
seen a ton of people pay off their debt and afterwards,
(08:31):
you know, the couples get divorced. I've seen people retire
early and then head back to the workforce because they
meet these goals that they are told is the secret
to contentment. Early retirement, debt, freedom, paid off house, whatever,
that these are what you need before you can be
(08:53):
fully happy or or just realize your full potential. Right
in reality, these are not the things that are going
to do that for you. You have to be content and
happy and joyful and realize your full potential now. And
these are just things that will We'll expound on it.
(09:16):
So when you're content, you realize you don't need the
financial goals and you don't need to buy more stuff,
or renovate in a different way, or travel to all
the places that you're going to. It saves you money
in that way and then the other. This may be
even part three. I guess this may be a c.
(09:37):
You also acknowledge the hard work you've put in to
improve your spending, to say no to more stuff when
your friends are to say no to certain types of
travel because they don't suit you, or to say yes
to certain types of travel when other people are not.
And you celebrate these accomplishments, and you let them inspire
(09:58):
you to keep moving. You realize what you are capable of.
You realize that you are You're not just floating through
life buying the next thing, living paycheck to paycheck, just
kind of floating through life. You're achieving things. And sometimes
we think that other people are doing it, so we
(10:19):
should be able to do it too. And I am
so guilty of this. Every time I accomplish something, I
never celebrate it. I'm always like, well, somebody else is
doing it better, so I got to get to where
they're at. Contentment shows satisfaction. It's not just feeling, it's showing.
So you are also in addition to saving the money,
(10:42):
and knowing that the goals and the spending won't make
you happy. You're also showing up and celebrating yourself and
learning and learning new ways to achieve more, to figure
out new ways to live into your full potential.
Speaker 3 (11:05):
Yeah, I'm realizing we could be on either end of
the spectrum, Like, complacency isn't the only option of where
we could find ourselves. We could find ourselves on the
complete opposite end of the spectrum, with that hustle, that
grind that I've got to keep going and do the
next thing before we even pause to consider. But where
(11:28):
does my contentment lie? And then when you're complacent just
kind of okay, las a fair who cares what happens next?
Probably this would coincide with ideas that things won't ever
get better for me, scarcity, mindset, these kinds of things.
So we could find ourselves on either end. And so
(11:49):
contentment is holding the tension between those two things where
we're not hustling to a point where we are lacking
mindfulness and intentionality, but we're also not experiencing this degree
of complacency either, holding the tension in that way.
Speaker 1 (12:07):
Yeah, so let's expand on the these two pieces, the
A and the B. Now I'm just saying it might
be a C, but we're gonna I wrote it in
the outline as an A and a B, so we're
going to expand on those. So the first contentment you
don't need more stuff, different stuff, is essentially contentment with
(12:29):
what you own and do, and then the part B
will be contentment with who you are and what you've done.
So the first part, though, is contentment with what you
own and what you do. So people on social media
or around you may be telling you that the next
new thing or vacation will make you happier. I know
(12:50):
millennials we value experiences more than things, but there comes
a point where only so many vacations will add value
to your life. Vacations, traveling, and you know, working abroad,
all that stuff. That's also not the true key to happiness. Uh.
(13:13):
It's making sure that you are indulging in the experiences
and having the experiences that are truly who you are,
not what other people are telling you to be. So
understanding that the places you go or the new things
you buy won't make you happier. The only things that
(13:37):
the only things that will truly make you happier are
the things money can't buy. And we've said that over
and over again, right, So, like, what are the things
money can't buy? They are the four fs. We think
they're faith, family, friends, and fulfilling work. And that fulfilling
work is professional and non professional, so either you're philanthropy
(14:01):
or your professional life. They don't have to be the same,
is the thing. Also, sometimes we think we have to
do fulfilling work, like we have to do our passion
as work. But you can have fulfilling work that is
professional that pays you income, and fulfilling work that is
non professional that may not pay you an income. So
(14:21):
these are this is kind of like the baseline for
being content is having these things that you know money
can't buy. Because new things bring joy, they do for
a short time and they're great. But we want to
focus on the vital few, the real the heavy hitters.
(14:45):
We talk about the eighty twenty principle and saving money,
Like we've got the vital few, and this is a
topic that we're gonna talk more about in twenty twenty four.
Twenty percent of your actions result in eighty percent the outcomes. Right,
it's the same with your experiences and your contentment. Twenty
(15:09):
percent of these things that money can't buy are going
to bring you eighty percent of your contentment. And so
it's finding what for you are these heavy hitters that
are really going to bring you joy for the long
term that you really want to invest in, and those
are they're not going to cost money, but it is
(15:29):
going to take money for you to be able to
experience them. So we don't forget about the income and
increasing the margin between income and expenses, but really look
at those things that are going to bring you the
most contentment.
Speaker 3 (15:47):
The next category that we can look at in shaping
where we are experiencing contentment is with who we are
and what we've done. I think this is probably contentment
two point zero. It certainly can take us some time
to get to a place of contentment with what we
(16:08):
own and what we do, but I think this is
a deeper level of reconciling who we are, our personhood,
our personalities, the things that we've done and accomplished. And
I don't think that this is easily come by, and
I think there can be a lot of barriers. This
experience can ebb and flow. But when we can find
(16:31):
contentment at that deeper internal level, It too will have
some really phenomenal impacts, certainly on our lives, our lifestyles,
and our finances. I think being content with yourself and
who you are and what you've done has so much
(16:51):
to do with contentment in our seasons, acknowledging the parts
of the time that we're in currently that might limit
us and be able to look for beauty in it,
and the ways that the season helps you rather than
hurts you. I think we can often play that comparison
(17:11):
game of looking at what we don't have because we
see what others have around us, whether it's social media,
people in our community, are close friends, maybe family, doesn't matter.
Wherever we look, there's opportunities to see, Oh they're able
to do this, but I can't because XYZ and this
(17:32):
is a call to shift our focus to what's actually
within our control. All of us can have this propensity
to focus on the things that give the most of
our time, energy and attention to the things that are
outside of our control that we don't have influence over,
rather than what's inside of our control that we can
shift and change. And similar when it comes to gratitude,
(17:56):
being able to look at but what do I have
as a result of this season? Jen, I know you've
talked about like an example of having young kids. We're
just talking about this over coffee the other day. Yeah, yeah,
I mean you speak for yourself. I mean, no, exactly
what you said.
Speaker 1 (18:15):
This is. This is what I'm going through right now,
is that I have a lot of friends that don't
have kids, and I'm looking at them and I'm getting
down because I'm like, these people can do all this
stuff that I can't. And I know full well if
I did not have kids, that I would be looking
at my friends that did have kids and being envious
(18:37):
of them having what I want. So there's always going
to be this creeping grass is green on the other side, right,
and and we're going to talk about that too. But
like they the finding like acknowledging your entire season, right,
not just the parts that are beautiful, but the parts
(18:58):
that limit you, and still looking for beauty in that.
So my kids, like they're expensive, they delay me from
going out at night or ever. It's all like very
If I focus on that, it's very depressing, right, Like
(19:18):
I want to go out, I want to do these things.
I want to have more opportunities like to go to
conferences and to do stuff in the business, and I'm
just not in a season where i can do that.
But it's still a beautiful time with them because They're
never going to be this young ever again. I'm never
(19:40):
going to have kids this young ever again, because we're
done having kids, and there we are teaching them to
be members of society and teaching them lessons that we
didn't necessarily get when we were younger. So there is
(20:00):
there are these beautiful things, but I think we're maybe
told just focus on the beautiful things. There's a lot
of there's a lot of extremes on social media. It's
either focus on all the beautiful things or dwell on
all the sucky things. And I think I might have
gotten on dwell on all the sucky things algorithm. But
(20:24):
there is a radical middle in it, and that's where
contentment is found. It's not the delusion that everything is
great and everything is worth being grateful for. It's just
really acknowledgment and choosing to choosing to look on the
(20:45):
bright side as much as you look at the realities.
Speaker 3 (20:49):
Every choice is going to have an opportunity cost to it.
There's always going to be consequences to the path that
we've chosen, which I think can be really hopeful that that, oh,
we can make decisions from here on out that we
feel are going to benefit us and not stay stuck
(21:09):
in the things that decisions we may have made in
the past that now we're seeing ough this didn't benefit
me as much as I had hoped. I think personally
I can struggle with this at times. With the career
path that I chose. I chose to go into social work.
I spent fifteen years in that profession and was able
(21:34):
to accomplish some really beautiful things, but do not have
much to show for it in the bank. And I
think I can get in these moments of man look
at where all these other people are at at this
stage of life in their mid thirties to forties, and
they they're really established in their careers, and they've been
able to increase their income and within the field that
(21:57):
I was that I've been in, it just hasn't been
as exponential as who I am choosing to look at, right,
It also has to do with who are you choosing
to compare to, But then at the same time being
able to recognize there's choices that I made, and none
of it comes without a degree of sacrifice. But to
also recognize for me personally, I wouldn't change any of
(22:20):
it either. I am so grateful for the experiences that
I've had in the field. Is what it has produced
in me, my outlook on life, my understanding of the
world around me, what it has led me to today.
And I think that's going to be the exercise of
constantly looking at that, but then again not the complacency
(22:41):
piece of what can I do going forward so that
I can feel really good in the next ten to
fifteen years as I look back on what I chose
now to be doing with my time, energy resources, how
can I be stewarding them to the best of my ability?
And I think content with your season in that way
(23:02):
and yourself, it helps you to be able to acknowledge
what you're good at, like what you enjoy, versus what
drains you, looking at ways to do more of those
things and less of the others. I think that too,
has been helpful for me in my own career path
chosen of Yeah, but this is what I was good
at and this is what was life giving to me,
(23:24):
And yeah, sure there's sacrifices to it, but there's sacrifices
to the person who has made six figures every year
straight out of college. Like nothing is ever exactly how
it seems to the thing that we're comparing it to.
And so we can lean into and recognize what's my season,
who am I, what am I good at, what's life giving,
(23:46):
what's depleting? And do more of the things that are
life giving less of the things that are depleting.
Speaker 1 (23:53):
Yeah, I think it's it's a vicious cycle because I
think complacency can come out of if we are trying
to be content with what others find joy in instead
of what we find joy in, then we can create
this attitude of apathy because other people may like for me,
(24:14):
I hate dishes, but I love meal planning. Other people
hate meal planning, but they love cooking. So I personally,
I'll make these beautiful meal plans, but I make sure
they are as few dishes as possible, they are as
simple as possible. I spend a little more for pre
chopped frozen veggies, but I still say because I'm following
(24:37):
through with my meal plan, because I'm making I'm doing
more of what I'm good at, and what I find
joy in versus what people on social media who have
their entire career around like cooking or maybe just like
enjoy it more. I see these moms with like six
kids and they're always making these delicious meals. It's not me,
(25:00):
But I can still find joy in this process by
focusing on what I am better at, what I find
more joy in. A question that we get a lot
is like, how do you almost how do you find
joy in becoming frugal? Right? Because spending money is fun.
Doing stuff is fun, not quote quote unquote not doing
(25:23):
stuff is not fun. And how do you focus on
these long term goals? You find your why? How do
you focus on your why for doing this stuff that
is seemingly hard? Is that is realistically hard? Is that
you have to find joy in the day to day.
(25:43):
You have to find the things that bring you joy.
You have to find the things that you are good at,
you love. Because when you create a frugal lifestyle that
you enjoy living, then it's not a means to an end.
Then you're not looking for enjoy and spending money when
you're still living a frugal life and you would rather
(26:06):
be spending money, and you are bummed that you cannot
go out and go shopping or do the expensive hobbies.
You haven't found joy in your why and so there
that just comes with practice, and it comes with a
lot of introspection, and I mean it will be, It
(26:30):
will happen. You just have to keep going with it
and learning more about Okay, these are the things that
I don't like. These are the things I'm going to
lay down. These are the things that I'm okay with.
They don't really bother me, so they get to stay.
And then these are the things I really love. These
are the things I really enjoy day today, and they
(26:51):
also help me get closer to my financial goals. They
also help me spend less or earn more. These are
the places you want to spend your focus on. These
are the places that when you invest in them, they
are going to help you enjoy your frugal lifestyle and
be content.
Speaker 3 (27:12):
I think considering all of these things is an investment
in ourselves and the long term of life. Again, this
isn't the how exactly should I arrange my budget? This
is the what do I want out of life? What
do I want to be giving and receiving? And what
makes me tick, what lights me up. It doesn't again
(27:36):
have to be the exact job that you're doing. You
could keep the job that you're doing and find these
things outside of it. But this is the deeper work
that is going to mold and shape and shift a
life of knowing what's enough of being content, which then
helps us have more informed spending patterns, ways of managing money,
(28:01):
not just kind of going after whatever is right before us,
because we haven't yet discovered what it is that we enjoy,
what it is that makes us tick, So we're kind
of just grasping at anything that someone might tell us
and spending money on it and kind of on.
Speaker 1 (28:19):
That not so helpful beneficial cycle. So what do we
do when complacency starts to creep in? Because you can't
care one hundred percent of the time. I see all
the time on like how to pay off debt articles?
What's the first thing you do? Number one is always
find your whye. Number two is always make a budget.
(28:40):
And I'll just tell you that's the that's the top
half of every article about that. But like you can't
care about your why all the time, It's impossible, Like
sometimes you're just going to be apathetic about the journey.
Whatever you're trying to do, whether it's safer retirement, payoff debt,
get your finances on track, you cannot care one hundred
(29:03):
percent of the time, so don't try. So what do
we do when complacency starts to creep in? We refocus
ourselves on contentment and that's where active gratitude comes in.
It is not the one hundred percent solution, but it
is one highly effective thing that you can do to
(29:27):
reorient yourself back to contentment. So the definition of thankful
or grateful is the conscious is being conscious of the
benefit received. So basically, you can't be happy about things
you haven't acknowledged yet. That's why it's so important that
(29:47):
the second part of contentment is recognizing and being satisfied
with your accomplishments, with where you're at. So you can't
be happy about things that you haven't acknowledged. So really
showing gratitude, gratitude, journaling, gratitude, meditation, however you want to
practice it, it is simply acknowledging benefit benefits that have
(30:12):
been received. So I would say if you're in a
slump with your no spend January, if you are in
a slump with your debt payoff. Then for two weeks,
shift your focus to gratitude journaling. So make it a
(30:33):
priority every day for two weeks to be doing some
sort of short gratitude journaling. And essentially that is just
acknowledging benefits received that day, anything you received that day
that is positive. Uh So, being and doing this challenge
(30:58):
knowing that it has an end and it's a short
and we're not doing like a thirty day gratitude challenge
just two weeks or maybe even one week. It causes you, like,
I know, at the end of the day, I'm going
to have to write down what I'm thankful for, like
what good things happen to me today. It makes you
away during the day because you're paying attention so that
you can write it down, either when it happens or
(31:20):
at night. When we don't look for things, we don't
find them. When we look for things, we find them.
So the things that are going to happen to you
are going to happen to you, regardless of whether you're
looking for them or not. It's training our mind or
resetting our mind simply to focus on the good. It's
(31:40):
because it's so much easier to focus on the negative.
We know that, and we forget to focus on the
good stuff. So when you feel like you are in
a slump, and this can be in anything, but especially
with when you have to say no to spending money
on something or you're just feel really apathetic about paying
(32:01):
off your debt, try this for two weeks and see
how transformative it is for your feeling of contentment.
Speaker 3 (32:13):
Yeah, and I think we can know when we're approaching
complacency by certainly how it feels inside of us and
what we see showing up in our lives. I think
that complacency, knowing when this is creeping in, it will
probably feel like stagnation, maybe feelings of being stuck, or
(32:35):
that I don't know if I can care about this anymore.
I don't know if I can actually shift the needle
on this thing anymore. Like that debt pay off example
that you gave, Jen, I think it's at those points
which we're going to have to keep a pulse on this.
We have to be doing regular check ins with ourselves
as well to even know if we're hitting a place
(32:57):
of complacency on any given aspect of our lives. And
it's okay to reach that point, but then what we're
going to do about it?
Speaker 1 (33:07):
Then?
Speaker 3 (33:07):
What what are we going to do about it? I
do also think that we need to keep a pulse
on when we are hustling too much as well. I
think this can be a place a lot of us
find ourselves, is if I just do this extra, extra,
extra thing and it's backbreaking to us. And I think
(33:28):
we can know when that's happening by feelings of overwhelmed,
feelings of not being enough, feelings of just sheer exhaustion maybe,
And that's when we can also be saying, how can
I pull in the reins here? I do think that
that gratitude journaling is going to help in both directions,
(33:52):
because what it also does is creates a mindfulness about
our space, our current season, how we are moving through life,
which can give us a clearer focus and aim on
what's actually worth my time and energy right now and
reevaluate and come to a new place of reset. Okay, yes,
(34:17):
I do want to keep moving forward with this thing
that I have set out to do because I am
reattached to my why again and so just taking this
pulse and gratitude thankfulness, checking in with yourself is going
to be what helps to move the needle on that.
(34:39):
But at the same time, will achieving the next financial
goal make you content? Now spoiler alert, Now it doesn't
like keep we keep reaching different goals. And I know
you said, Jen, you have a really hard time celebrating.
You're just kind of like onto the next thing, which
I think a lot of us can commiserate with. And
(35:01):
there is this concept of the hedonic adaptation that states
once we achieve something, we return to a relative state
of happiness or whatever baseline homeostasis we were at before
that we're kind of now this is the new level.
I think this is lifestyle creep has to do with
(35:24):
this that oh, if I just get that promotion, that
new job, if I'm just in this other house, and
yet the reality is, yeah, that's great. We're not saying again,
don't be complacent if you want to take hold of
the next thing. That's how we know we're alive because
we're moving forward and we're doing new things. But we
(35:46):
will adjust. Then you get that higher paying job, you
get that raise, and now your expenses can start to increase,
and now you just need more and more and more.
It doesn't have to be that way, but untethered and unchecked.
That's the direction it can go. And so understanding that
(36:09):
any one of these goals or accomplishments isn't going to
be the end all be all in and of itself,
it's worth aiming at, but that is not what's going
to lead to ultimate contentment. It is going to be
those things that money can't buy. And I think that
this happens when we've learned how to master our spending
(36:30):
and achieving your financial goals, knowing that it's not going
to make you happier or satisfied, but it will lead
to greater levels of contentment when we feel like we're
the ones truly in control making the informed, insightful decisions
about our money.
Speaker 1 (36:52):
Yeah, we talked about it earlier, but the four fs,
Faith in whatever you have, family, friends, your chosen family,
and then fulfilling work, the things that where you feel
like you're contributing to this world in some way you
(37:16):
are in whatever way you feel good about. It doesn't
always have to be in a nonprofit or in some
kind of like way. That's I don't know. It doesn't
always have to be giving money places and volunteering at
soup kitchens, right, It can be anything that makes you
feel like you're making an impact in your community, you're
(37:37):
leaving the plate, the world a better place than you
found it. Like, these are the things that we are
really aiming at, and these are the reasons that we
choose values based spending. These are the these are the
things that are going to bring us joy in values
based spending. Like I can say no to this thing
(37:57):
that I have realized now that I don't care about
as much because I have found these things that I
care so much more about and I just didn't get
to uncover them until I took time to stop just
running on the hamster wheel. So that's really we want
(38:18):
contentment to inspire you to pursue these things more, to
pursue stronger relationships with the people in your life, to
pursue more impact in your community, more impact in your
child's lives, in their friends' lives. So all of these
things are beautiful things to pursue. And there are things
(38:40):
that can be realized very immediately. Sometimes we define this
why and you know, why are you paying off debt?
Why are you saving for early retirement? And there are
things that are so far off into the future, but
impact like based these four fs are very very near
(39:01):
to you. You can have an impact, and you can
build strong relationships, and you can grow stronger in faith.
You can do all of these very immediately. And so
these are the things that we replace with the instant
gratification of a quick like what a quick purchase at
Target can get you. It is probably the most even replacement.
(39:26):
So when you feel like you are bored and you
want to go shopping somewhere, instead of you know, jumping
straight to oh, I should probably just like gratitude journal
because that's I know, that's what you really want to do. False,
that's what I've never wanted to do. Instead, look at
these things that are the things you want that money
(39:48):
can't buy, and start to think of ways start now
making less of like how can I get more of these?
How can I build these things that I truly want.
We've talked about Massow's hierarchy of needs quite a bit,
and at the top, at the bottom, it's all your
core needs, right your shelter, your food, your safety, your
(40:10):
sense of safety. At the top, though, it is all
the self actualization and the respect and the connection. Look
at ways that you can get more of that because
that's what you really want, and that's what these for fs.
They bring you those things that you really want that
money can't buy. So when you're thinking why am I,
(40:35):
you know, why am I feeling apathetic? And may be
because you're pursuing things that are not the things at
the top of your hierarchy of needs, the things that
you want most.
Speaker 3 (40:47):
So well said, I think too, it's worth stating that
in the midst of this, we can also combat the
fear that increasing our lifestyle will lead to a destruct
to spiral. I think again, that's the pushing back against
a certain type of complacency of well, I need to
(41:07):
just stay here at this level of income or this
type of location, because if I do anything different, then
that's going to mean I'm not being content. And I think, yeah,
we can push back on that too, to say we
can we can aim for something as long as it's informed,
as long as we know this is what we want.
(41:28):
We've done that deeper work, we've done the gratitude journaling,
we've dug into the four FS, and we don't have
to fear that, oh, I am not going to be
able to be in control of myself anymore if I
get this next thing, everything's just going to spiral out
of control. That's not true either. No matter what we
(41:50):
achieve next, it won't be our ultimate happiness, but it
also won't be our ultimate destruction. So we can keep
going and be in formed as we're going and certain
that this is what I want to do. And I
am aimed at contentment along the way, at each and
(42:10):
every point when I don't have the job, when I
do have the job, when a meal plan and excellently,
when I'm not, when I'm crushing debt, and when I
need to slow down because of my season, all of
these things, no matter what the season is, we can
find contentment. And as we aim at new and different
(42:30):
and maybe increased goals within our finances and personal lives,
we can also find contentment. And do you know what
leads to my greatest contentment?
Speaker 1 (42:42):
I am content to say, yeah it is. It does
bring me true joy. It is an instant gratification, and
it's something that I don't ever have to uh pursue.
It always just comes the bill of the week.
Speaker 2 (43:10):
That's right, it's time for the best minute of your
entire week. Maybe a baby was born and his name
is Williams.
Speaker 1 (43:18):
Maybe you paid off your mortgage.
Speaker 2 (43:20):
Maybe your car died, and you're happy to not have
to pay that bill anymore. Best Bill Buffalo Bills, Bill Clon,
This is the bill of the week.
Speaker 4 (43:30):
Hi, Jenna Jel. This is Haley from Sugarland, Texas. I
recently discovered your podcast and I've really been enjoying going
back through the old episodes and finding on some content
that's helpful. My bill of the week is my student
loan bill. So when my husband and I got married
five years ago, right after I graduated from college, I
had about sixty thousand dollars in student debt, and in
(43:52):
our first free years of marriage, we took on too
carlans as well. When the payment pause happened during the pandemic,
we really prioritize paying down our debt highest interest first,
and on the very last day of the interest pause,
we paid off my last student loan. And now in
five years of marriage, we've paid off somewhere in the
(44:13):
neighborhood of eighty thousand dollars of debt and the only
debt we're caring now is our mortgage. Thanks again for
all your advice and awesome content.
Speaker 1 (44:21):
Whoo whoo oh wow. I'm doing the sounds early congratulations, Pailey.
We are going to give you all the energy that
you need from us because you didn't sound like you
(44:44):
were acknowledging your success enough, so we're going to do
it for you. Here we are.
Speaker 3 (44:50):
We're celebrating these accomplishments because my goodness, are you aiming
at some things? Five years eighty thousand dollars? Oh wow,
that took some grit. I know that had to take
some powering through complacency, lack of motivation, sacrifice, feeling like
(45:11):
you're missing out. But man, am I feeling on top
of the world with you right now? How incredible? Well,
Don Hayley, thank you so much for sharing that with us.
Speaker 1 (45:24):
Here's the thing. If you are listening to this right
now and you've paid off any amount of debt, I
don't care how long ago it was, and you've kept
it off and you've kept it paid off, I need
you to acknowledge your success in that and call in
and leave that as your bill for the week. I
need you to just head to Frugal Friends podcast dot
com slash bill tell us how much you paid off
(45:48):
and what it was, how long it took you, and
if it was a long time ago, and you kept
it off like tell us that too, that's an accomplishment.
We forget what we are cape be love when we
do not reflect on the things that we have done,
and that stagnates us, that limits us from accomplishing more
(46:10):
in the future. So it's time for you to take
the time to call in too, Frugal friendspodcast dot com,
slash bill and leave us your bill and acknowledge your
successes so that you are motivated and inspired to have
more of them.
Speaker 3 (46:28):
That's how we practice contentment. That's how we practice gratitude.
That's how we practice giving back to the fellow Frugal
Friends community to encourage each other and celebrate your own accomplishments.
Do it, leave us your bill. We're ready for it.
And now it's time for.
Speaker 1 (46:54):
All right for the vulnerability around today. What experiences or
values do you can consider priceless and truly believe money
can't buy?
Speaker 3 (47:05):
Jill, I think money can't buy I'm going to be
the student who sits at the front of the class
right now. Money can't buy contentment. But truly, for myself,
I think this is peace and enjoyment. I have yet
(47:30):
to find something that I when I just spend money,
am I finding peace and enjoyment in life? Money intersects
with it. But what I've learned gives me This is
time with close friends and family, and time outside digging
(47:53):
in the dirt. These things are so life giving and
precious to me, and it is what cultiv It's an
enjoyment of life for me. Of course, it takes money
to be able to have some flexibility to spend the
time that I do with other people and time in
the garden. And certainly sometimes I spend money on my plants.
(48:15):
I mean, what else, what else are you going to do?
There are a core value of mine. So yeah, and
money intersects with it. But I think that that enjoyment,
that contentment, that piece, that's something that like, if you
were to just be like, just buy it, I couldn't like.
It takes these other things that can't be bought and
(48:38):
but yet are so important to my personal and internal
well being. What about for you, jen.
Speaker 1 (48:48):
H? So I'll give a recent example. Last night we
went to a friend's Christmas party because we're recording this
in December, and we brought our kids and and Atlas,
my eight month old, fell asleep on my chest and
(49:08):
it was a really like that does not happen often,
and so like I just kind of stopped socializing and
like sat down and kind of embraced it. I think
I'm trying to be present in this season of having
young children, because like when we got home from the party, Kai,
(49:29):
my four year old, screamed the whole way home that
he didn't want to leave, he wanted to go back,
and then would not let us put his pajamas on
him to go to bed, and he was just like
writhing and did not he just was up to way.
So like, it's stuff like that that is the worst
that I dwell on that I think about, and so
(49:52):
I'm actively trying to dwell on good things like a
baby be sleeping on your chest, or literally twenty minutes
later when Kai was hugging me and sale, I love you, mommy,
you know, stuff like that. So I think that's where
(50:12):
I am right now, because I'm not like a mom's mom.
I'm like not mom all the time, world's okayest mom.
I'm I'm like below that. So I'm an adequate mom
and it's not my life's passion. So I have to
(50:33):
actively seek to be present and to enjoy those things.
But I mean there's there's also a sense of like,
I get to do my fulfilling work, is my professional work.
I'm super blessed to be able to say that. It
(50:54):
is not like highly profitable like some other places. The money.
There's not a ton of money in telling people to
spend less, so go figure. I have to be like
it's sometimes I am a little bitter when I talk
to other people who are in the space and they're
(51:17):
crushing it, you know, building businesses, making a lot of
money and doing good things. But I have to actively
remind myself that I'm I get to do what I love,
and I get to talk about what I love, and
I do actually make a livable wage from doing it.
(51:37):
I I forget that when I'm focused on what other
people have and what seems to come so easily to them.
Speaker 3 (51:49):
Yeah, because the flip side of that is someone else
is guaranteed looking at you thinking, oh man, she's got this,
she's got that. And that's just the proof of why
the comparison game just isn't fruitful in any stretch and
truly like what you are practicing of Yep, there's all
(52:10):
these things and I can acknowledge them that I don't
love about this current season, but there's just as many,
if not more things I can acknowledge and choose to
focus on that are really beautiful about this stage and
this season that I'm in. And you're more than an
okay mom, Jen, you just you just do it differently
(52:35):
than what is And I don't even want to say
like then most then how motherhood has been portrayed to us,
or how some in a certain circle might be acting
out motherhood. But the reality to it is there's just
as many styles of mothering as there are mothers.
Speaker 1 (52:57):
Like this, and you're all going to do.
Speaker 3 (53:00):
It in the way that you're going to do it
and the motherly instinct that you're going to follow that's
right for your children.
Speaker 1 (53:08):
Yeah, and I'm the type of mother. You've had a
lot of goldfish and Gerber puffs on my floor.
Speaker 3 (53:14):
Right now, and that's beautiful. And you know what, they're
going to stay there because we don't believe in food waste.
Somebody or something will eat I.
Speaker 1 (53:26):
Don't believe in food waste. My children don't have the
same beliefs.
Speaker 3 (53:30):
Thanks everyone for listening. We do hope that this has
helped to inspire some pondering about contentment how to aim
at it in your life. We also love reading your
very kind reviews. This is something we love to celebrate
and feel grateful for, and this is how we're saying
thanks by reading one recent review from Elena S. Who said,
(53:55):
so inspiring. These girls help me feel normal and motivated
well on a debt free journey. Keep up these episodes, ladies,
can't wait to hear more of your tips. I'm so
thrilled to be here to keep up motivation, help to
inspire people in what can be for a lot of
us a really long and arduous journey, especially the debt
(54:17):
free journey. There's certainly a lot of sacrifice that comes
in that particular season. I can commiserate. It took me
seven years to pay off sixty thousand dollars, which is
a very long time. It's indicative of how low my
salary was at the time. And so I'm here for
all of you. You're in your debt pay off journey,
We're here for you. Yes, thank you so much for listening.
(54:40):
If you enjoyed the show, please take a minute to
leave a rating or review on Spotify or Apple. It
helps potential new listeners know what the show is all about.
If there was a particular episode like this one that
really spoke to you, call it out in the review.
Let people know what episodes are your favorites, so they
know which wants to tune into first.
Speaker 1 (55:02):
Yeah, that's good, See you next time. Google Friends is
produced by Eric Sirianni. So where oh it's no spend January,
(55:29):
Yes it is. Okay, we all wear that we're not
recording this in January. But I have a no spend
tip or no spend story that I will be using
in January.
Speaker 3 (55:44):
Cool cool, cool cool.
Speaker 1 (55:47):
So my kid Kai needs booster se and I didn't.
I bought new car seats infant and regular, but I
was like, booster seat, I can get that used. So
I've been looking and I was like, maybe I could
get it for free. So what I did was that
(56:11):
I posted a rug that I no longer need that
I was just going to get rid of for free.
I posted that on Facebook Marketplace for forty bucks and waited,
and somebody finally, you know, paid me thirty dollars for
the rug. And so then I turned around and I
went to the booster seat section on Facebook marketplace, and
(56:35):
I found a lady who had three brand new booster
seats that she was selling for twenty dollars each, and
I said, hey, would you accept thirty thirty dollars for
two of those seats and she said yes. So I
basically got two booster seats for free because I was
just going to put that old rug like a curpoler
(56:57):
and they're brand new.
Speaker 3 (56:59):
And you need to for eventually when Atlas.
Speaker 1 (57:01):
Needs one, No, I need one for my mom's car.
Well I was only gonna get one, but I got
two because we already have one, so we'll have then
Atlas will use the car seat that's in my mom's car,
and then each car will have a.
Speaker 3 (57:19):
Booster perfect well done. I love that no spend January
doesn't mean no.
Speaker 1 (57:29):
Spend, no buyo. I mean no by faults. It doesn't
mean that.
Speaker 3 (57:35):
Just like if you can make it a wash, that's creative,
that's solving problemsoh ooh, I.
Speaker 1 (57:45):
Like yeah, So, I mean what it was is just
like I just had to wait for a little bit.
I had to think in advance, like, Okay, we are
gonna need booster seats in the next month, so what's
one thing I can sell to that you know, might
make some money. And that was that.
Speaker 3 (58:05):
Rug I like, I like it.
Speaker 1 (58:08):
I also posted a weight bench, so I posted two
things that I was like, whatever one sells, that's what
I'll use. The weight bench has not sold.
Speaker 3 (58:18):
A little bit of patience, No, oh that keep that
weight bench because it's January. January is around the corner
for us right now. Everyone's gonna be like, yeah, I'm
doing it, I'm exercising.
Speaker 1 (58:34):
But I mean, if you want to exercise, Facebook Marketplace
is a great place to get a weight bene in Yep.
Popular Podcasts
Bookmarked by Reese's Book Club
Welcome to Bookmarked by Reese’s Book Club — the podcast where great stories, bold women, and irresistible conversations collide! Hosted by award-winning journalist Danielle Robay, each week new episodes balance thoughtful literary insight with the fervor of buzzy book trends, pop culture and more. Bookmarked brings together celebrities, tastemakers, influencers and authors from Reese's Book Club and beyond to share stories that transcend the page. Pull up a chair. You’re not just listening — you’re part of the conversation.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace. I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com