Are we still single moms? Feat. Shekem and Orlando

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Atlanta.

Speaker 2 (00:00):
Guess what the good Moms are coming to your city
on April twenty six. We're pulling up at the Black
Effect Podcast Festival.

Speaker 3 (00:09):
That's right, We'll be hitting the stage with other hot
podcasts like R and B, Money, Trap Nerds, Naked Sports,
and Sarah Jakes.

Speaker 2 (00:16):
And if you've ever been to a Good Mom's Bad
Choices show, you know it gets real, real bad, and
we have some special guests. So I'm so excited to
meet our Atlanta tribe. Make sure you pull up April
twenty six to the Black Effect Podcast Festival and get
your tickets at Black Effect dot Com Slash Podcast Festival.

Speaker 1 (00:34):
See you there.

Speaker 4 (00:35):
Once upon a time, there was a good old traditional housewife.
She cooked, she cleaned.

Speaker 5 (00:40):
Cared for her children and the man of the house,
and of course she.

Speaker 6 (00:43):
Didn't talk back.

Speaker 7 (00:44):
She was both.

Speaker 8 (00:45):
Obedient and soft by nature.

Speaker 6 (00:47):
She was a good woman who always made good choices.

Speaker 9 (00:51):
I sing that shit off.

Speaker 2 (00:52):
We're good Mom's Bad Choices too, single mom who said
fuck the patriarchy, shared all.

Speaker 9 (00:56):
Their bad choices and sound out they were so bad.
After all, we're experts. Over chairs and your new bestie,
sit back and do the ride.

Speaker 1 (01:03):
I can do a pack on my.

Speaker 9 (01:07):
Welcome back to Good Mom's Bad Choices.

Speaker 1 (01:09):
I'm Erica and I'm Meila, and it's Wednesday. You're gonna
see you.

Speaker 9 (01:14):
Holding hands off camera while we haven't introduced the guests yet.

Speaker 7 (01:18):
Can help us?

Speaker 1 (01:19):
Sorry, m.

Speaker 2 (01:27):
But I like no want to see her for three seconds.
Welcome back to Good Mom's Bad Choices. I'm Erica and
I'm Meila. Happy Wednesday, bitches, it's it's the.

Speaker 9 (01:38):
Ojis of uncensored motherhood. Okay, coming live in effect black effect. Hey,
just in case you bitches forgot.

Speaker 1 (01:46):
Let him know, baby, we started all this ship.

Speaker 3 (01:48):
We started all this ship. Two single moms walking to
a bar, one holding tequila.

Speaker 1 (01:54):
And the other one on the brink of a breakup.

Speaker 9 (01:56):
Both with tequila in hand.

Speaker 2 (01:58):
C we found love in a hopeless place, Rihanna, this
sounds familiar. It's because maybe you've wrote our book, A
Good Mom's Guide to Making Bad Choices.

Speaker 9 (02:06):
And if you haven't, this is a reminder that you
need to. Because what other book starts like that Mother's
Day is coming out.

Speaker 3 (02:12):
That maybe you know a mother who's about to become
a mother, or a woman who's thinking about becoming a mother,
and she should probably rethinking her decision, or maybe she's
on the brink of giving birth. This is the book
you need to give her, because well, we know what
we're talking about.

Speaker 2 (02:29):
It's the Motherhood Bible. It is so you could just
call us the Black Jesus.

Speaker 9 (02:33):
We wrote it.

Speaker 1 (02:34):
They're black jesesas.

Speaker 9 (02:36):
Lossas mos Las. Who's this?

Speaker 3 (02:46):
They're Los Angeles, like of Nazareth, but of Los Angeles.

Speaker 1 (02:50):
Got it, I got it, I understood.

Speaker 9 (02:56):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (02:56):
How are you feeling this week, my dear?

Speaker 9 (03:08):
Okay, okay, thank you.

Speaker 1 (03:10):
I feel good. I feel great.

Speaker 2 (03:13):
I feel like I've been dreaming a lot.

Speaker 9 (03:17):
Me too.

Speaker 2 (03:18):
I've been having a lot, a lot of dreams, like
every single night of vivid ass dream and normally I
don't even remember my dreams, but I've been remembering.

Speaker 1 (03:29):
Not not every detail, but more than usual, and.

Speaker 2 (03:34):
I've been recording them when I wake up, because if
I don't now forget.

Speaker 9 (03:40):
I just remember.

Speaker 3 (03:41):
I had a lot of vivid dreams, I told Orlando,
But right now, in this moment, I can't think of
any of them. And I had the when I feel
like last night, I've had a really really vivid dreams.
Since I put this like a symbol on my mirror,
but I'm gonna start recording them.

Speaker 9 (03:53):
That's a good idea.

Speaker 2 (03:54):
Yeah, you just have to like hit the voice memo
on your phone immediately. But I had one the other
night where all my hair was falling out. It was
like just like a little patch of hair, and then
I started like moving it, and then like more started
coming out, and.

Speaker 1 (04:05):
Then I was like, oh my god. And then I
went into the room. Iri was there and I had
like a U part, but it.

Speaker 2 (04:11):
Was bald, bitch, I had a fucking you part. It
was really devastating. So apparently I looked it up. It
means either fear of aging or stress and anxiety, or
I don't know, fear of change.

Speaker 9 (04:28):
Interesting.

Speaker 1 (04:29):
Interesting, basically fright.

Speaker 9 (04:32):
It's a tip of the week. Tip of the week
is record your dreams.

Speaker 2 (04:38):
Oh yeah, that's tip of the week. Yeah, record your dreams.
I think I was telling Mila, or I was telling
you or somebody I was. I think I told you
be careful putting a mirror in front of your bed
when you put that mirror there, and then I didn't
have my mirror in front of my bed, and now
I have a mirror ish sort of facing the corner
of my bed, and I swear ever since I put
that mirror there, I've been having a lot of dreams.

Speaker 3 (04:58):
I think it was a mirror. Plus putting the symbol
on the mirror. This, I think it's a syllicle. I
don't think you need a symbol for the dreams to happen.
Oh well, that's the only time I started getting them
super vivid shit. I don't know anyway, Anyway, today we
have some very special guests. You guys, it's a very
special it's a very special week on Good Mom's Bad
Choices because the first in the lifetime ever occurrence that

(05:20):
we've ever had on Good Moms.

Speaker 9 (05:22):
It's been seven years and this has never happened. So
you were in for an exclusive, exclusive, exclusive drum.

Speaker 1 (05:29):
I'm nervous.

Speaker 3 (05:30):
You'll be okay, You'll be okay. Today we have very
special guests, like I said before, and the guests today
are are none other than our men, our men, our men,
our partners, our boyfriend and fiance.

Speaker 1 (05:51):
Do you remember in an episode we had a practicing boyfriend.

Speaker 3 (05:54):
One time twenty we got boyfriends and we like officially
and we were like we have but.

Speaker 9 (06:00):
We got.

Speaker 1 (06:04):
A friend of a friend.

Speaker 3 (06:05):
Was a boy we were allergic, probably because were allergic
to them and we were fighting against our bodies. But
now we can say it's strong. Welcome to the show, Orlando,
and shut him. Hey, you've been on the show before.
You're always on the show, hovering over my shoulder every

(06:28):
move I make.

Speaker 2 (06:29):
I mean, I've what I've been. I saw the first
episode when they didn't know you guys were going to
be boyfriend and girlfriend. Then I was there when you
guys were date.

Speaker 7 (06:38):
Girlfriend at that time.

Speaker 3 (06:39):
Officially, you really didn't really believe it because you told
us it was a lie.

Speaker 2 (06:42):
Wasn't true because you guys weren't because you weren't committing fully, No,
I was.

Speaker 9 (06:46):
You were just saying, like, you never go visit her.
You guys are not a relationship. Remember you called it.

Speaker 3 (06:52):
You're not paying her rent. You don't pay for her
to come see you. And I was like, I just
said there quietly.

Speaker 2 (07:00):
Now I had to do a check if you were
strong enough, mad enough to deal with my questions, Orlando.

Speaker 3 (07:10):
And then you did it again in November when we
did a couple of months and you asked us if
we knew each other by asking us questions.

Speaker 1 (07:16):
Oh, that's the one I'm thinking about Yeah, no, I
was thinking.

Speaker 3 (07:18):
About the one before that in Woodland Hills where he
was on that other podcast that we don't speak of.

Speaker 9 (07:24):
Is that other weird guy?

Speaker 2 (07:26):
Oh yeah, you guys were kind of not you guys
were you guys were not official?

Speaker 3 (07:29):
Then it was Remember he went on a hard press
release and I was like, chill out.

Speaker 1 (07:33):
Okay, Well that's why I didn't believe. That's why you
with you. I'll be going off your energy beach anyway.

Speaker 3 (07:39):
Well now I have less commitment issues because I got
a ring, y'all.

Speaker 2 (07:44):
I was telling me al I was nervous for this
episode because I've never obviously had a partner on the
show before, and she was acting like I was crazy,
and I was like, bitch, you don't.

Speaker 1 (07:51):
Remember how nervous you were the first time. Orlando she
was over here.

Speaker 6 (07:55):
Like I'm nervous.

Speaker 7 (07:55):
Should we do this?

Speaker 4 (07:56):
I don't know.

Speaker 1 (07:57):
I'm like, how quickly we forget?

Speaker 9 (07:59):
I was nervous for my other hos.

Speaker 3 (08:01):
It was it was more about it wasn't about me
going public. It was just more like, it feels like
it's super like pissing on me in public. Even though
Orlanda had told like fifty people online already, so that
was my biggest concern. But I've really I've grounded into
my partnerism. As you can see, I'm wearing a long dress,

(08:21):
which screams I'm in a relationship.

Speaker 7 (08:23):
That's a good Christian woman right now.

Speaker 1 (08:25):
Wow, you're so conservative cat ears.

Speaker 9 (08:29):
Yeah, I'm a house not a wildcat.

Speaker 5 (08:33):
Speaking speaking of dreams, you were in my dream last
night too. Really, it was kind of embarrassing.

Speaker 6 (08:39):
To tell.

Speaker 5 (08:41):
We were at a pool party and Chelsea and I
forgot her name, the dark skin girl from Black Girls
Sex thing. They were like, Miila had cheated on me
in the pool. She was having sex with some money
in the pool.

Speaker 7 (08:53):
Wow. And then they had came home and me. They
were like, I think Mela was having sex with that
guy in the pool. I was embarrassed. Pay it off.
I was like, you know, we're not monogous.

Speaker 2 (09:03):
You know, you know that's right, protect your relationship publicly.

Speaker 7 (09:09):
I was like, you know, she she could do that
because you're not.

Speaker 1 (09:12):
Curse her ass out later that that was your dream?
Did you wake up mad?

Speaker 9 (09:16):
Like what happened?

Speaker 7 (09:17):
We had that? Then we had sex. It was better.
I felt better about myself.

Speaker 9 (09:22):
You didn't tell me any of this.

Speaker 1 (09:24):
A bit abusive and sex this morning, know that I.

Speaker 3 (09:27):
Think of it for some shit I didn't do in
somebody's pool I don't know of.

Speaker 7 (09:33):
It's crazy.

Speaker 2 (09:35):
We wanted to have a We wanted to have an
episode with our men, because you know, I score the
Internet a lot, and I noticed that there's a lot
of just.

Speaker 3 (09:44):
Women hate and man hate. And I'm not even sure
if we like each other. You just like to have
sex with each other. So I figured today it would
be a good day to just promote.

Speaker 9 (09:51):
Young black sexy love.

Speaker 3 (09:54):
And we're talking about a lot about reparenting ourselves as
we parent children, but now we I have to learn
how to reprogram ourselves in relationships because well, we never
seen any healthy ones, how about you too?

Speaker 9 (10:09):
Not TV doesn't.

Speaker 10 (10:10):
Count, TV doesn't count fresh prints and theolong doesn't count,
all right, so if Love Jones doesn't count, I have
been blessed to see a few really good relationships growing up,
aunties and uncles, and I got a pretty good blueprint.
But then again, it's like you can only use so
many of their tricks because they're different people and they're
old and stuff used to go back then that doesn't

(10:30):
really go now and they're old back then Flowers chocolates
in the movie, was like, we're going together.

Speaker 6 (10:36):
It's like, that's it.

Speaker 1 (10:38):
Now, you gotta get a Burken bag.

Speaker 2 (10:39):
Apparently people's rent and that's why.

Speaker 3 (10:43):
I have no broken bags. Oh my god, speaking of
I let her trying to embarrass me. Today, there was
a girl here. She had on a full Gucci outfit.
I was like, Wow, a nice outfit. She was like,
Orlando said, you own this outfit. I was like, I
don't own any Gucci. He's like, you don't own that outfit.

Speaker 1 (10:59):
I was like, no, Why did you think she owned
that outfit?

Speaker 7 (11:02):
You've seen it?

Speaker 3 (11:04):
No, because you're buying me a Gucci or Burken bags,
Which bring us back to the conversation, do we even
go together?

Speaker 7 (11:09):
We stop? She know my dreams and might get some,
you know.

Speaker 3 (11:17):
Unfortunately, Dannian turned into a very hard gangster with tattoos
on his face, so he didn't have the same hold
on me as an adult. Seventh grade seventh grade though,
it was crazy, I know, but I just you know,
I think a lot of the internet couples that we
see are always like very over the top and annoying.
And I also notice a lot of the couple's content
is no offense you guys.

Speaker 9 (11:39):
It's very Christian.

Speaker 3 (11:40):
It's very wholesome and Christian, and I sometimes I can't relate,
you know, because it's always like putting a Bible verse
in there.

Speaker 9 (11:46):
So I just figured, we what what content is?

Speaker 1 (11:50):
Are you being fed?

Speaker 9 (11:51):
I'm telling you, I get fed a lot of couples content.

Speaker 2 (11:54):
We're trying to fuck with you. The Christian content, couples
content is in your algorithm.

Speaker 9 (11:58):
Yeah.

Speaker 7 (11:58):
Interesting, Actually I know what you're talking about.

Speaker 6 (12:02):
That.

Speaker 1 (12:02):
I do know what you mean. I just didn't know.

Speaker 2 (12:04):
I see the wholesomeness I see, but I think that's
like there's a mix of wholesome normal and perhaps you
know people.

Speaker 5 (12:13):
I just don't necessarily like it because it's like it's
always leaving it up to God. There's never really any
real work or really advice to do. It's just yeah,
because you know, things were bad and then we prayed.
It's like, no, you communicated, you spoke, you had hard conversations,
you brought things that are forefront, and you know, you
breathe an ice theired and then things got a little
bit better. But it's never really any real work or

(12:35):
advice like that. It's just you know, pick out a
Bible verse and I'm.

Speaker 2 (12:39):
Gonna let you know right now that they didn't breathe
an ice stair. I'm going to let you know that
most people are not breathing in ice stair.

Speaker 7 (12:45):
They didn't do that. Instead of oh okay, I.

Speaker 1 (12:47):
Was saying that would be great. I think more people
need to do that.

Speaker 7 (12:50):
They need to do Yeah, yeah, it's terrible.

Speaker 3 (12:53):
Anyway, as you guys know, we were hosting couples Are
Treat in June. We are a couple Tanto Retreat. It's
in Costa Rica. It's our second home. It's gonna be
warm and sexy and bomb and we're gonna do a
lot of sexy shit there. So I figured a better
place to talk about the ins and outs of our relationship.

Speaker 6 (13:12):
Yes, beautiful experience.

Speaker 9 (13:18):
Didn't you guys just hit it? One year anniversary? How
does that feel? Guys?

Speaker 10 (13:22):
It feels good. It feels good. It feels like it's
been longer. But we're also not rushing, so we purposely
move slow.

Speaker 2 (13:31):
I think that's nice, not like lesbians. Yeah, one year
and lesbians is like seven hundred years. Yeah, it's like
seven years yeah.

Speaker 1 (13:44):
I think.

Speaker 2 (13:45):
I mean I shared about this on the podcast too
early on, that we entered into our relationship in celibacy
and in an understanding that we were going to really
get to know one another outside of that and build
intimate see in other ways, how was that for you? Yeah?

Speaker 1 (14:04):
How was that?

Speaker 2 (14:05):
How was I mean, I've shared what it was like
for me, but what was like that? What was that
like for you? In this relationship?

Speaker 6 (14:10):
Celibacy was fun? It was fun because celibacy, by yourself sucks.

Speaker 2 (14:16):
I'll say that, I mean because you were already on
a celibacy journey for almost a year before.

Speaker 6 (14:21):
Yeah.

Speaker 10 (14:21):
And and by suck, I mean I think we're both
very We both have very high sex drives. And the
reason why I was celibate was so that I can
find a way I was attempting to master redirecting my
sexual energy into a creative force, and I was learning
really good things, having a good time. But then there's
other parts of it that you would like to experience.

(14:43):
And so I had a great time in the beginning
because I felt like we were experimenting with every possible
thing first, and I think we verbalized like we prioritized
experimenting with everything first, and it was fun.

Speaker 6 (14:56):
It was like an adventure.

Speaker 10 (14:57):
It was a little exploration of my patience of my
own willingness. I don't know how to expand on that,
my own willingness, like just being willing to do things,
even with Iri being willing to play. And the whole
beginning of that was just fun experiencing what I was
willing to do. And then when we finally decided to
do it, it was intentional. We fasted before. I think that's

(15:20):
really important.

Speaker 9 (15:21):
Fast.

Speaker 10 (15:22):
Yeah, we did a water fast for seven days. That
was before we decided to consecrate that.

Speaker 9 (15:27):
Why do you think that was important?

Speaker 10 (15:28):
Because not only did we go on a journey together
in the fast, we went on a journey together. But
I think it's important because I know I purposely cleansed
everybody out of me to the best of my ability
before offering myself to.

Speaker 6 (15:44):
You in that way.

Speaker 10 (15:45):
So I know we can't completely rid ourselves of all
of our experiences, and nor do we want to. But
I wanted to get rid of as much cook and
muck and leftover so that I can go into this freeman.

Speaker 6 (15:58):
And I did it. I came do this for free,
so it felt good. I loved it.

Speaker 7 (16:01):
So you're born in virgin.

Speaker 2 (16:05):
It popped my cherry and I was a virgin again.

Speaker 5 (16:10):
You know, we might be a good for for this,
like couples, true, because me and Mila hit it off zero.

Speaker 7 (16:15):
To one hundred.

Speaker 3 (16:17):
First of all, I want to make sure that's a
celibacy is funds.

Speaker 1 (16:25):
They were definitely no. I really enjoyed it. I highly recommend.

Speaker 2 (16:29):
I've talked about it endlessly, how important it was for
our relationship and how it's been.

Speaker 1 (16:33):
Important even like I've done, I've had done.

Speaker 2 (16:35):
I've been celibate before this, and that was also important,
But this was different because before I was celibate, not
necessarily it was for myself, and obviously when we did it,
it was for ourselves individually, but it was also for
this entity that we've created.

Speaker 1 (16:51):
You know, me and Mela talk about our.

Speaker 2 (16:53):
Entity that we have America, and shir Ken and I
have an entity as well that we've created, and like,
I think that when we wanted to consecrated and really
create the foundation of it, I wanted it to be
a clean slate, you know, or at least try my best.
I think I'm I'm not the perfect person. I'm sure
that I've brought up ship from the past that has
nothing to do with you, and I think as women

(17:14):
like and men, I think mostly women that I think
women do this the most is like where they bring
things up from the past, like I'm just you know,
would you agree that? Would you agree that women usually
not your past like bringing other things like.

Speaker 1 (17:30):
Yeah, and I didn't. I wanted to try.

Speaker 2 (17:33):
My best to really give this relationship and this this entity,
this thing that we've created like a complete fair shot
of just like purenessship, the relationships funk your palate, palate

(18:00):
selibacy is the ginger of relationships.

Speaker 3 (18:04):
It's interesting you say that, though, because I just recently
sent Orlando a real about It was about preparing for pregnancy,
and a lot of the times a woman is always
thinking like that you have to prepare because you're carrying
the baby. But this this reel was like basically saying
that there are certain conditions in pregnancy that come from
the sperm. Like for when it set out to me,

(18:25):
it was preclamsya because that's what happened in my first pregnancy,
in my first delivery. So I was like, huh, they're
like before if my if my woman can give a
nine month period where she's building and they're like having
to be in this certain like alignment for this child
nine months. Then the year before that is the responsibility
of the cleansing of the man. So that once we
do take and think I do, I've been like I've

(18:47):
I've recognized in this iteration of child bearing years, my
latter years, that there's a preparation that I want to
have with my body, like physically and obviously spiritually too
that I'm more like in tune with because I already
have a kid that I didn't have a lot of
preparation for. But I never considered it, and like I
didn't really consider them having to do ship before having
a baby. Really, I was just putting it on the

(19:07):
pressure on myself. But then I mean even yeah, because
the sperm is very like life giving and then I yeah,
but to apply that to taking it into a new
relationship is you know, that's elevate, Like that makes sense.

Speaker 7 (19:22):
I try to cleanse myself befo a relationship that's a
lie kind of episodic we have here we're supposed to
be to save face.

Speaker 5 (19:33):
Baby, no, no, no, for real, I started, like the
main girls that i'm talking to. I start let them know, like,
not be around as much, not gonna be answering calls
as much.

Speaker 2 (19:41):
Good morning, not a ghoster, you're you're.

Speaker 5 (19:46):
These the situationships, I don't let them know there's a
main one. Start posting her more on stories, let them
know what top of time.

Speaker 6 (19:52):
I was really honest, I'm watching. I'm seeing it the
whole time. I'm watching.

Speaker 5 (19:56):
Yes, I do it every time. Every time about to start
a relationship, I start acting a certain way. I start
going from a hole to a husband mentality, start thinking
of like flowers and stuff.

Speaker 9 (20:05):
I start thinking flowers.

Speaker 5 (20:07):
Ideas, where can we go in the city, Like all
the things have to start coming up. I started prepping
myself for a relationship. Then boom, my husband again.

Speaker 3 (20:13):
Okay, I'm really interested in this. As we're on this
topic of preparation for relationship, I think that obviously to me,
this is a surprise. But no, no, I recognize that.
But I don't think a lot of women get the
opportunity to hear from the perspective of men, all that
that requires and how how that looks. I think there's
most women think that if they're going to be in

(20:35):
a relationships.

Speaker 7 (20:37):
You look like you got some good to say. That's
your camera.

Speaker 6 (20:42):
Listen, do you want a list?

Speaker 9 (20:46):
Go ahead please, This is the list of preparation.

Speaker 7 (20:49):
All right.

Speaker 10 (20:50):
We're going to go back and forth on a checklist
of things you have to check off before you even
decide to pursue a woman because you might end up
wasting her time and your money. So yourtrong number one,
learn how to clean yourself.

Speaker 1 (21:07):
Yeah, you would think that standard standard taking no steps.

Speaker 9 (21:12):
If they don't, they think they know.

Speaker 1 (21:13):
When you clean yourself to me, like your dick or ye.

Speaker 9 (21:15):
Ye, yeah, I was thinking physically.

Speaker 5 (21:17):
Like your nails, wash clean under my fingernails, Wash your
hands more because that's the can.

Speaker 1 (21:21):
We also add teeth also, all right.

Speaker 10 (21:28):
I'm talking still hearing from some of my homegirls that
niggas don't know how to floss properly. Okay, so we
need to rethink the lotion we're wearing. It's no more jerggons,
my brothers. Listen, you're a king, you deserve that shade.
But okay, I'm gonna go with that first hygiene washing
your bed sheets, right, No, want to wash your clothes,
you know, throwing away all the ship yes, okay, just

(21:50):
number one.

Speaker 7 (21:51):
Okay, my first thing is exercise number two. This is
this is the person.

Speaker 9 (21:56):
Stamina.

Speaker 5 (21:56):
I'm gonna have to stamina and specifically stand up because
this is the person. It's not like I'm just in
and out one nice stands. I could fuck around and
like maybe have a bad nice whatever. She's not gonna
be around. I'm never gonna see her again. It's not
gonna happen. This person's gonna be around all the time.
So I need to be on tip top shape to
deliver and perform. And exercise is really the one hit
the elliptical. That's really that's really to go to fifteen

(22:17):
minutes before you work out five.

Speaker 7 (22:18):
Minutes after because you never know.

Speaker 3 (22:19):
We're gonna read a podcast and then he's gonna ask
you did you come last night? And then you tell
the truth and say no, and then he's gonna be
really mad.

Speaker 9 (22:29):
That never happened. I'm just saying, just in case it happened.
Number three SIPs tea slowly.

Speaker 10 (22:39):
Number three read a diverse amount books, and I don't
think it has to be serious. I don't think it
has to be self help, because after three of them
are all saying the same thing. Fucking believe in yourself,
know yourself, and do it yourself all right. Outside of that,
read a fucking novel. Expand your imagination. It might help

(22:59):
with read fun things, read poetry, read read, read philosophy,
expand your funk.

Speaker 1 (23:06):
Nig just read, please read, just read a book.

Speaker 6 (23:08):
Read read.

Speaker 3 (23:09):
So it doesn't have to be love centered, or I mean,
I would appreciate. You know, when me and Orlando first
started dating, he read a book called every Man's Marriage,
and I thought it was a little serious from the
beginning of a relationship with the n it was a
good Christian book, and I thought it was a little serious,
but I also respected it. Look look at this man
reading a good Christian how to Become a Husband's book.
So it kind of implied to me that he was.

Speaker 1 (23:30):
Preparing for something that mattered.

Speaker 3 (23:33):
And I think if we were taking a test in school,
or you know, if something important was coming up, like
an sat if you wanted to get into that college,
you would prepare with your inner knowledge and so in
your wisdom. And so I think in adulthood there's many things,
there's lots less things that challenge us to prepare to
pour into and so we lose the idea of gaining

(23:54):
knowledge and tolerance or you know, like all of those
things in order to prepare. But it's like having a baby,
like we just said, super important, right, how to be
prepared for that. If you plan on being married, it
being a long term relationship, again important, how to prepare
for that. But we just think we're fucking just find
winging it. And then now your kids ten and you're
trying to figure out how to say no because you didn't.

Speaker 2 (24:15):
Read the books before you had the baby. So yes,
I agree with book reading.

Speaker 7 (24:21):
My next one's kind of like a two parter.

Speaker 5 (24:23):
The first part of this is, wherever you are financially
in alive, plan on making more money when you're about
to get in that relationship, or if you're in a relationship,
plan on trying to somehow some way make more money financially.
It's a money driven world. But the other part about
this is plan that vacation because I feel like a
vacation is a fast track to finding out if you

(24:45):
can be with this person because it puts you in
a lot of this is different scenarios outside of your
comfort zone, and then you have to see if you
and your partner can then operate within this space that
is both.

Speaker 7 (24:57):
New to both of y'all.

Speaker 3 (24:58):
I do agree with that environment just you two. So
then there are challenges that may come up, and then
you can see if your problem skills problem solving skills together.

Speaker 5 (25:08):
Every single vacation I've ever done has ended tragically except
for Jamila, and that's how I knew the shoes my person.

Speaker 2 (25:16):
I mean, I think that's also like for people that
are considering coming on the trip and think, oh, I'm
just like just started dating someone, this is actually the
perfect place to come and test out and see if
this is if this is right, if it feels good,
if you guys can adventure together, if you guys can,
like you said, problem solve together, if you can have
fun together, if your interests are similar, and if they're not,

(25:39):
are you open to expanding your interest for your partner
and being open to and being open.

Speaker 3 (25:43):
This would even be like a good first trip. I
think sometimes people think couples are treating.

Speaker 1 (25:47):
WHOA, they think I'd be married, like.

Speaker 3 (25:50):
It almost like it's couples counseling now, but it's not.
It's like a group trip, but it's also grounded in
having fun, deepening intimacy and connection. So if you're early
on in your relationship, like super early, like me and Orlando.
When we met four weeks later, we went to a
different country for a week.

Speaker 9 (26:06):
Not knowing each other at all.

Speaker 3 (26:08):
It's crazy idea, I thought, But it ended up being
one of the best things we could have done because
immediately I was like, you're my travel boyfriend. But I
think that people put people overthink pouring into your relationship
in the beginning, because that already tells the universe. I
don't even know if it's gonna work versus like, what
are we both here for. Let's just do something crazy
and like invest in going on a trip and doing

(26:30):
something fun together.

Speaker 10 (26:31):
Well, I think most times people think of those investments
that are a couple thousand dollars a lot five days,
and they think it has to be put into something
that's always supposed to last forever. Every big investment is
supposed to be in the one that lasts forever. And
the truth is, you don't know who the fuck or
what the fuck is gonna last forever. And if you
can just accept that and receive that every opportunity has

(26:52):
medicine in it that's gonna last you forever. Then it
doesn't matter who the fuck you're with right now. And
if you're within five years down the line and you're
still doing some of the practices we give you, that's great.
And if not, and if you're using it for somebody else,
but you needed this person to prove to yourself that
you could do it, we need these things too. So yeah,
allow the levity to be in vacation, and that's important.

Speaker 5 (27:14):
And you could always learn something because those women that
didn't work out. I definitely learned something and applied to
my relationship with Jimihilla in the beginning, because I knew
nothing about brunch. Not yeah, this girl put me on
to brunch. She was a terrible girlfriend, but she put
me on too.

Speaker 1 (27:32):
I knew nothing about over.

Speaker 5 (27:34):
No no, I slept the first night me and Mila met.
I slept over and I looked at her and I
was like, you want to go to.

Speaker 9 (27:40):
Brunch the first meal of the day. That's where the
bitch talked. You bitches loved to eat in the morning.

Speaker 7 (27:45):
That's what she said. I was like, you want to
go to brunch, went to brunch and there's a perfect
start to the day.

Speaker 9 (27:49):
Honestly, he ordered me the steak and eggs, and I
was like, oh, he's not cheap either, and then I said, okay,
I'll go to the beach with you.

Speaker 5 (27:59):
Yeah, and men, men got to get back to peacocking
in the beginning. Like you know how birds when they
try to get a mate, they start doing them dances,
birds trying to show it off.

Speaker 3 (28:09):
Can you insert one of those those bird mating.

Speaker 9 (28:19):
They do those for hours.

Speaker 3 (28:20):
Yeah, the men need to go this is this is
about primal relationship dating.

Speaker 9 (28:24):
They did a dance for hours. The birds many species.

Speaker 5 (28:27):
Okay, go back to men like showing off for their partner,
not just showing off because they want the Instagram likes
and all the things like buying a whole bedroom of
flowers because they want to put it on Instagram. Show
off just for specifically one person and then let everything
just fall into place.

Speaker 7 (28:43):
But that's when we need to get into.

Speaker 5 (28:44):
Men are sitting here with the table in front of
them asking women to bring stuff like this is crazy,
this is madness. What happened to what we used to
do for the women to show off that we actually
wanted them and how bad we wanted them.

Speaker 7 (28:56):
And we need to get back to begging.

Speaker 5 (29:00):
Yeah, I don't know about begging verbally, Well, we need
to beg with your actions.

Speaker 7 (29:03):
Again, that's a good quest.

Speaker 5 (29:05):
One that's just me specifically and how I think of
how I want to go about things. But we're waiting here,
sitting here and expecting people to just bring things that
will complete each other instead of just having an experience
together and just enjoying enjoying each other's presence and whatever
comes with comes with it.

Speaker 3 (29:25):
You know, I'd like to say to just to tag
onto that about the begging. You know, as a former
hot girl in the streets, what I will say is
I always said, and I thought this was going to
protect me forever to ever having to commit was a
man is going to have to make it so clear
and obvious that he wants to be with me, because

(29:48):
I would never be the one to like really aggressively pursue,
because I always, even as as modern as I am,
I always feel like it was a man's duty to
kind of do the pursuit. And because I knew so
many niggas were not going to do.

Speaker 2 (30:06):
It, I was just like safe. I was like, I'm
never going to ask this nigga what we're doing here?
But honestly, most of the niggas I ever dated, including Orlando,
said so what are we doing here? Where are we
moving into anything?

Speaker 9 (30:16):
And I was like, oh, the men were doing that
to you the other way around.

Speaker 7 (30:20):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (30:20):
Always, it was not my mo to even ask this
question because that was how I protected myself from ever
having to have any commitment. And every time someone did,
I was like fuck, and then I would like kind
of get into a relationship. But the truth is because
it was like a protection mechanism because I think a
lot of men don't stand on business and say, most

(30:41):
men are not like I want to be in a relationship.
So it kind of if you were a hot girl
like me, it kind of saves you from ever having
to like take the dive in. I don't really have
to stop sleeping with anybody else. I don't have to
stop dating because we didn't even have the conversation because
I'm not bringing it up and I know this man
is not going to because he's just a man. But
when it's real, a man is going to do all
the things by doing the bird dance.

Speaker 9 (31:03):
And so that is why we're.

Speaker 3 (31:05):
Here with both our men with in a relationship. Because
Orlando was very clear and committed, and even though we
were on lots of mushrooms when he asked me, so,
what are we doing here? And I was like, nothing,
what are you talking about. We're doing mushrooms, That's what
we're doing here. He's like, but you know, like, you know,
what do you see us? What do you see for
us in the future? And I said, babe, I saw

(31:28):
you sleep with like four girls at that sex party
last night. I don't think we're headed for any future.
But then he realized quickly that wasn't a good move,
and he continued continued and continued, and continued to.

Speaker 7 (31:40):
Be very.

Speaker 3 (31:43):
Fourth right, persistent and forth right about what did he wanted,
and that was what Finally I was like, Okay, I'm
not going to be a bitch.

Speaker 9 (31:51):
I'm going to start shifting too.

Speaker 3 (31:53):
But I really needed someone to like pull me by
the hand and say, yeah, bitch, this is the way
we're going.

Speaker 5 (31:58):
Yeah, don't worry about all the mothers girls I was
bird dancing for I'm bird dancing for you right now.

Speaker 9 (32:04):
I think, is what kind of backwood is this?

Speaker 1 (32:06):
That is the aromatic la?

Speaker 9 (32:10):
Oh wow?

Speaker 2 (32:12):
Yes, this is for the la babies, and it I
know I was, I was gonna bite that off very aggressively,
but I didn't know if that was sexy or not. Yeah,
I've been I've been smoking these aromatic ones lately because
because you're nice, I got a peck. They're smooth, right,
and they're limited edition.

Speaker 1 (32:31):
I think they are limited to edition, just like you
look in the back.

Speaker 2 (32:34):
It's a limited Yes, you're right, limited edition, just like me. Okay,
sorry to interrupt, you keep going.

Speaker 1 (32:40):
I was gonna say, I.

Speaker 2 (32:41):
Think with me and she Cam it was it was similar,
but it wasn't like I think because I had just
coming out come out of a relationship and I was
really like, I don't.

Speaker 9 (32:52):
Know, I was.

Speaker 2 (32:54):
I was a bit damaged, traumatized, traumatize and not damaged,
but I I was raw, I would say. And he
was gently persistent, and I, like I told you, like
early on, I didn't even know he was pursuing me
because I was just like, he's just nice and he's

(33:16):
nice and he wants He keeps asking me to do
things every time. Every time we're together, he asks when
we're going to see each other and makes the date
like right then and there, and I needed that. I
really I didn't think that's what I needed. But I
did need someone that was consistent. And and I think
that that I guess pecocking or whatever you want to

(33:40):
call it, or just the pursuit. The pursuit looks different
for every man, right, Like your pursuit is different than
his pursuit.

Speaker 3 (33:50):
His pursuit was soft. You know, for a year, I
was fucking around. I moved a man in the dog
in for a couple of months and then he was
just like, bitch, i'll call you back. And I tried
to break up with him and he said I'll call
you back.

Speaker 9 (33:59):
You know. So there is there's different styles in what
you can be.

Speaker 3 (34:03):
What I mean, yeah, I pursue, but I do think
for the feminine, we need the masculine to lead and to.

Speaker 9 (34:12):
Say I'm choosing you.

Speaker 3 (34:13):
We need to hear that I'm choosing you and I
want you and like I don't care what you're talking about,
because bitches are going to talk, because we're going to
test you because it's in our DNA to be like
how about now?

Speaker 9 (34:24):
How about now?

Speaker 3 (34:25):
And I know most men are going to hear this
and be like very irritated by me saying this, But
I think that it's a part of our job to
kind of know that you have tolerance and you have
the drive to pursue me, and after one you know
one thing, it's not going to just falter and you're
going to go to the next bitch, because there are
a lot of bitches, and there's more beautiful bitches in
us and more beautiful bitches in them. And so I
think when you choose someone, it has to be so

(34:47):
verbal and out loud.

Speaker 9 (34:48):
You can't be like, well, I gave you flaw. It
was two days in a week.

Speaker 3 (34:50):
You know, you got to be like, hey, bitch, you're mine.
I want you to know I want to work on this.

Speaker 1 (34:58):
Do you think that most men know that?

Speaker 6 (35:02):
First of all, I think most men should hear what
you just said. I don't.

Speaker 10 (35:07):
I think most men may know it innately. I think
men who are pursuing women that they see a future
with will find ways to verbalize it from where they're at.
I think I choose you as a beautiful thing to say.

Speaker 7 (35:20):
You know.

Speaker 10 (35:21):
So, I'm curious I'm going to answer that question whether
most men know that. I'm not sure. I think we
innately know. You guys have to be taken seriously. But
what does it make you, guys feel like when a
man says that, why is it those words that.

Speaker 6 (35:33):
It's just said something.

Speaker 2 (35:34):
The first word that came to mind is it disarms me.
It's there's like a there's a wall that immediately goes.

Speaker 3 (35:40):
Dirt, dirt, dirt that we are that we innately already
have around us because it's a protective army.

Speaker 2 (35:46):
So when hearing those words is extremely impactful, it's important
and it does like I remember, I remember when you
said it.

Speaker 1 (35:56):
I can I remember exactly where we were. We're in
the car in front of your.

Speaker 2 (35:59):
House, and I think I was like I would think,
I was like because I was confused, not confused, but what.

Speaker 9 (36:05):
Are these words?

Speaker 1 (36:14):
And you said that I'm choosing you. I want to
be with you, I'm choosing you.

Speaker 2 (36:19):
And immediately there was like a rush of relief that
came over that there was no more confusion.

Speaker 1 (36:24):
It was just exactly and.

Speaker 2 (36:26):
The confusion was on my own. It wasn't because of
anything that you had done.

Speaker 1 (36:29):
It it was me.

Speaker 2 (36:30):
It was like me, I think needing that and also
never receiving it, and from anybody really, it's always been
like just I guess insinuated or it's like yeah, we're
together now, you know. And I think hearing those words

(36:51):
from you was like, it's like a rapid healing for
me in this relationship. And I think so many women
feel the same way. And I think even women that
have been in long term relationships are sometimes even confused
whether they've been chosen. They're like, I know we're I'm here,
but like, how did we get here? Like are you
still choosing me in this.

Speaker 1 (37:11):
Version of who I am right now? Because there's going to.

Speaker 2 (37:14):
Be more choosing that has to happen beyond the first time,
I think throughout your relationship, because hopefully you're always growing
and hopefully you're always expanding, and hopefully that person is
you know, going to stay eye to eye with you
in the moments where like maybe you guys are growing
at different stages, but they're going to say, I'm still
choosing you. I'm still choosing you, And so I think

(37:34):
it's the first one is important. But I think now
that I've received it, I know and that and you know,
we're a year into our relationship, but I know that
I will probably need that multiple times throughout our journey.

Speaker 5 (37:48):
If I can answer your question, I think.

Speaker 3 (37:52):
She's a question to us about what does that make
us feel like that oh that we need that.

Speaker 2 (37:59):
I asked him that, and then he asked us what
does that feel like to us when it's on?

Speaker 7 (38:05):
It's said, Oh.

Speaker 3 (38:06):
I was gonna say one more thing before you go.
I was gonna say. I think it's the beginning of safety.
It creates a container that feels safe. Like, oh, he's
telling me he chooses me, so then like, yes, I
can disarm. And also like it's the beginning of like
you know, when you get into a plane and then
you start taking shoes off, and then like you get
into like a long road trip, but you got to

(38:27):
kind of get situated, put your cut down, make sure
you got the blanket, like you like, putting your seatbelt on,
and then you're like, you know, putting the you're putting
the rear view of the garage is going up, and
you're like, now you can drive.

Speaker 9 (38:39):
You know.

Speaker 3 (38:40):
It's like women really need a level of safety. And actually,
Adventure Bay gave me that analogy about getting in the car,
putting your seatbelt on and like getting situated before you
start driving. And he was like, even though he was
not my person, he was someone who did make me
feel safe in that space, and that was like me,
I recognize that that I'm choosing you is like the

(39:01):
beginning of like, oh, okay, you know, and then starting
this journey.

Speaker 2 (39:07):
I felt lighter immediately after I drove off. I think
I dropped you off and then I remember getting driving
for my car and be like okay, we got that
out of the way, out of the way. But like
once that's clear, like okay, now let's start another Yeah,
let's start living in this new chapter.

Speaker 9 (39:24):
Like let's you know, so, okay, what were we gonna say, babe?

Speaker 7 (39:28):
Sorry, no, I was gonna say that.

Speaker 5 (39:30):
I don't know if men necessarily like no it, but
they start to once they see an example of it.
That's when they know, right, Like for me, I always
saw a bad example, so I just knew like what
not to do. But once I saw an example of
like how to go about loving a woman and how
to go about showing a person that you really want them,

(39:50):
that's when I automatically knew how I wanted to go
about it.

Speaker 10 (39:53):
Say, for instance, my brother, can I interject to me,
I ask you a question, Yeah, just for the young
kings out there, how does man show a woman that
they're interested in them because I think in the beginning,
as little boys, we play and we push them to
the ground because our lack of verbal ability, you know,
it disables us from being able to verbalize it properly.
And then so but surely as we learn how to talk,

(40:15):
still don't really ever break that barrier.

Speaker 6 (40:18):
So was that a red shirt?

Speaker 7 (40:23):
All right? Right?

Speaker 6 (40:24):
Just for the kings out there?

Speaker 5 (40:25):
So all right, So my mom and my dad they
had like a very bad relationship. So I was used
to say, like, oh, as long as I do the
opposite of them, then like I'll be fine. But it
didn't necessarily like translate because I didn't know actually what
to do.

Speaker 7 (40:38):
I was just doing the opposite. That was what I saw.

Speaker 5 (40:40):
But then when I had a Auden uncle who were
madly in love with each other, and he was the
first one to let me know, like, oh, my woman
can go out and wear whatever she wants because I
know she's still loyal and loves me and she's coming
back here where as before. But like, my woman can't
go out wear all that. My woman can't go out
late at night. And he would be like, regardless of
whatever she does, I'm still gonna love her and that's

(41:01):
when I first understood a new unconditional love. Then I
had to figure out how that works and translates for me.
So like I'm not the type to like wait for
a woman's wall to come down.

Speaker 7 (41:12):
I'll just climb the wall. I'll climb the one right
big wall.

Speaker 5 (41:15):
All right, all right, I love you and I'm here
now and I And then that's when I learned from
myself that I showed love by like example. Right first
time me and Mila hung out, we slept over and
we just shrooms. I was just like I just I
say whatever comes to me. So I would look at
her just I was rubbing her, and I was like,

(41:35):
I'm your blessing.

Speaker 7 (41:38):
Climb the big wall. I'm your blessing.

Speaker 5 (41:39):
If I made it this far, I mean something to you.

Speaker 7 (41:44):
But my whole thing is always to like motes and crocodiles.

Speaker 5 (41:52):
My whole thing is always like being an example, and
like I'm gonna say that I'm your blessing, and then
I'm going to show you how many different ways like
I can bless you. And then you choose to go
about it however you want to go about it. Do
you want to really take on this blessing, or you
want to just keep your wall up and then just
figure it out with somebody else. But guess what, I
just climbed the wall. I showed you I can climb

(42:13):
the wall. And then that was just always my way.
And then after that was because I saw my own
and uncle have this like unconditional love. I just exemplified
it unconditional love in my own way by letting her know,
whatever you do, I will still love you.

Speaker 7 (42:26):
So I didn't. I didn't. I don't have a way
of like, hey, these are the steps to go about,
and this is how you're supposed to show love. But
I knew once.

Speaker 5 (42:34):
I saw what it looked like to love a woman,
I knew how to put it in my own words.

Speaker 3 (42:41):
That's crazy that for boys, the default is you can't
let it whereever she wants, she can't go out too
late with her friends. Like that's the programming you already
come with, and it's until you literally see.

Speaker 7 (42:50):
It see somebody else, cause you're already.

Speaker 3 (42:51):
A free, pretty free, laid back guy. But they're like, oh,
I don't have to trip about that. Yeah, you can
be chilling, and everybody's okay, you know what I mean
like you kind of you have to have seen it
to know that, oh, that's what I want to do
as a child, and as your brain develops, it's true
we need kind of like the visual there were like
I don't know, There's been certain times in my life
where I've seen women stay wild and have kind of
like wild men, and I identified with that, like she's

(43:14):
kind of launching, so is he.

Speaker 9 (43:15):
It's kind of works.

Speaker 3 (43:16):
But if I hadn't seen that, I would have always
believed that I had to tighten up.

Speaker 9 (43:21):
In order to be worthy, you know what I mean.

Speaker 3 (43:23):
So I had a clear vision because in little glimpses
you don't really see that on like a comedy, a
family comedy show at night or something like that. But
there are certain things that you can like as you
grew up, you remember you're taking plays out of everybody else's.

Speaker 5 (43:36):
Book, and you got to you gotta look at the
relationships that are like outwardly obviously happy, not the ones
that are just tolerating each other. And that's the difference
people think, because you know, they begins been together for
a long time and they're just tolerrating each other.

Speaker 7 (43:49):
For a long time.

Speaker 9 (43:49):
No, that's just the narrative that we.

Speaker 5 (43:51):
Lengthiness of the relationship, right, it's not about the length
of relationship, like within that time, what have you done?
Like have you gone on a lot of vacations together?

Speaker 7 (43:57):
Have you?

Speaker 5 (43:58):
Do you when you see this this couple together, is
it like they're together but they argue together, Your an
uncles together for a long time, but they argument, or
is like now I love that man over there, that's
that's mine, Like that's the kind of relationship that I
like try to exemplify and pay attention to. And we
don't necessarily see a lot of that. We just see
lengthy relationships, but not like outward loving relationships.

Speaker 7 (44:24):
You like that, right, Give me for that one.

Speaker 9 (44:32):
Yeah, we went on. We just dropped a lot of gems,
you guys, and now we're high.

Speaker 7 (44:37):
Yeah. I tried my best out here to be my best.

Speaker 3 (44:40):
Are there are there any particular things outside of him
telling you I choose you that you remember, just for
actionable things for people who are like I haven't seen that.
Give me some examples that like outside of I choose you,
like actions or things or like a pivotal moment in
relationship where you were like that weight was lifted and
you're like, oh way, huh.

Speaker 2 (45:02):
You know, like mm hmm um, there's been a lot
of moments. I mean there's been. I think Chackem's if
you can't tell, his energy is very calming, and so
I think the way that Shakhem has been able to
be my eye like the middle of a storm, like
in chaos, no matter what, Like when I see him

(45:25):
and I witness him and he walks into a room
like everything kind of like grounds me down. I feel
like he has been kind of like a nervous system
reset in human form for me, which is not something
I've never experienced before. If anything, it's been the exact opposite.
It's been like really disturbing to my.

Speaker 1 (45:46):
Or or or fleeting. I'm trying to think of this
particular moment.

Speaker 5 (45:55):
Hmm.

Speaker 2 (45:55):
I'm high. You're putting me on the spot, say do
you have any moments?

Speaker 1 (46:00):
But maybe I'm not thinking I'm come on through that.

Speaker 5 (46:03):
I mean, I agree with you on the comment and nervous.
He definitely comes my nervous. He's my space partner.

Speaker 7 (46:09):
We can take him right.

Speaker 5 (46:11):
But I can see it because I'm loud when I
play spades and he don't say a word and I'm.

Speaker 7 (46:16):
Like, perfect, he's my balance.

Speaker 5 (46:21):
But I can see it's really I can see how
like the presence of energy is like always there, and
it's it's it's like you're sure.

Speaker 7 (46:33):
Yeah, you come off as a very sure man.

Speaker 5 (46:36):
And there's a lot of men out here that not
really are really just winging it and taking the advice
of the ancestors or toxic advice of their like the
men before them, and they really aren't as sure about
what they're about to do or the decision they make.
But you, when you it's not about the man coming
to you and saying like I choose you or whatever.
It's the sureness that you feel behind it that lets

(46:57):
you know like, oh, he means it's never.

Speaker 9 (46:59):
Word he said, there's no uncertainty. Yeah, And it's usually
something very minor.

Speaker 3 (47:03):
I think I was just dropping a little off to
school and I'm be hung up with the phone and
I was just I don't know. It was like even
before he lives here, and I was like, I don't
have anything to worry about this Naka tells me everything.
And I was like, this is a crazy feeling, so weird.

Speaker 9 (47:17):
I was like, so weird.

Speaker 3 (47:18):
I don't feel I got off the phone. I don't
even feel I don't even feel anything. I don't you know,
Like I'm so used to being a relationship. I'm like
that it is lying or like something's just not that
it is, something doesn't feel settled. I'm always wondering, am
I like?

Speaker 9 (47:31):
Am I like? Does he like me?

Speaker 3 (47:32):
Or is there something else? Like I'm so used to
having that feeling with men in general.

Speaker 9 (47:37):
I was like, I've I noticed it. I was like, huh,
this is crazy.

Speaker 2 (47:41):
I feel like she comes inquiry is always is something
that made me know that, Like he asked me, He's
asked me so many questions, Like he's genuinely very he's
a very curious person, as am I. But he's genuinely
curious about me, and he wants to know me. And
I think I've been in a lot of relationships that

(48:04):
where the other person was doing a lot of fucking
talking most of the time, And that's that's that's also
like tells me informs me of like the what I
was choosing in that in that moment or in those
those years of dating in my life where I almost
wanted a man to not ask me like I didn't
I didn't even know if I had the answer until
I was asked. And so I think there's that that

(48:27):
has also been I think a true teller that I'm
safe and that this is my person.

Speaker 1 (48:35):
And also I.

Speaker 2 (48:36):
Remember in Costa Rica there was a time on the
on facetiming you were I don't know what we were
talking about, but you said like, I'm I'm here to
like show you that that's not here anymore, like I'm
changing that for you, like you can trust that this
is a safe space for you, and I'm here to
show you that. And I was just like what I

(48:58):
got off the phone, I was like, this man just
tell me he's going to prove all these niggas wrong.

Speaker 1 (49:03):
Is that what he just said? He just thinks about
to prove all these niggas wrong?

Speaker 7 (49:06):
Right?

Speaker 10 (49:09):
My goal is to prove your intuition right, because I
know that there's certain things that y'all grow up knowing
that you deserve, whether you saw it or not. And
I think seeing embodied versions of it is important, like
you said, and then sometimes it's not. It's like you
have to figure that shit out because you know you're
not wrong about it. So I appreciate your intuition for

(49:31):
even allowing the space because a lot of women, I'm
not gonna lie, a lot of women are not even
in space of fertility like that, they're in another space.
They're in the space of healing and like they should
be focused on themselves and still.

Speaker 6 (49:45):
Trying to date. And you have space for me.

Speaker 10 (49:48):
So I appreciate the work that you did and the
space that you create for me to even.

Speaker 6 (49:52):
Show up that way, because you could have just told
me to fuck off in that room. So I appreciate you.

Speaker 10 (49:59):
It was can't prove everybody wrong, but if we could
prove one thing right, it's that y'all's intuition is asking
for things that y'all probably deserve.

Speaker 5 (50:08):
I said something something like that to me, though before
moment she was a little bit more assertive to her.
She was just plaining about the relationships, plaining about something,
and I told her, you're in love. You need to
start acting like it, this relationship ship. You're in fucking love,

(50:28):
act like you are.

Speaker 10 (50:29):
Well, I think we should mention how difficult it is
to just completely switch a paradigm like that. Yeah, yeah,
because you when you really really want a relationship. I
feel like I knew what we wanted and we saw
an opportunity. You're deciding every time you bring some bullshit
into it, even if it's subconscious.

Speaker 6 (50:50):
And if we could create a safe place to be
a brand new person.

Speaker 10 (50:54):
Back in the day, you could just skip town over
and change your name.

Speaker 6 (50:57):
You're a brand new person.

Speaker 8 (50:58):
Change your birthday Charlie Brown, Arlie, Charlie Goodlie.

Speaker 7 (51:15):
Over two years ago.

Speaker 10 (51:19):
Like oh, ship get over to South Carolina'll be a
new nigga. We can decide to be like new people
and new experiences with like manifesting the experiences of love we've.

Speaker 6 (51:30):
Seen in our head.

Speaker 10 (51:31):
We can really take opportunities to do that, but I
don't know if a lot of people give themselves the
space to do that.

Speaker 3 (51:37):
Also, like just the paradigm shift is like when you,
like I said, I could like subconsciously committing that no
one was coming with any type of thing I was
going to be impressed with. So then I was like,
I'm protecting myself by expecting very little from men in general.
I knew I had no expectation because I didn't have
a lot of faith in it, you know what I mean.

Speaker 9 (51:58):
But I think a.

Speaker 3 (51:59):
Lot of like even Eric and I have done a
lot of work also not really realizing it on authenticity
showing up as ourselves, and I think we underestimate how
that's step one. If you are still struggling with how
like showing up as yourself, then how can you pursue
a romantic partner?

Speaker 1 (52:20):
You know what I mean?

Speaker 3 (52:21):
And even though we put a lot of our shit
on the table, it also gave space, like privately, we
can't lie either. There's no way I can fight up
with a boyfriend and be like, oh no, I slept
with three people, you know. I was like, bitch, I
just listened to two episodes and I heard about three people.
So it's like we gave ourselves this gift of showing

(52:41):
up as ourselves so that we manifested and attracted partners
that were going to be accepting and loving of that
and like also understanding because we've been fruitful in our
entity like that, whoever comes and has to honor that.

Speaker 9 (52:55):
And protect that.

Speaker 3 (52:56):
And I think we've both been in relationships where people's
like men try to like make comments about the way
we show up and it is it's very public facing,
but how how it felt like such a.

Speaker 9 (53:11):
Disrespect because.

Speaker 3 (53:13):
What it means to us and how like it's our
purpose in ways, and you could look at it at
the very entertaining base level, but in the larger sense,
our work is so deeply important for us because we
feel like it's life changing. But if someone a partner
comes and tries to like dim that, then it's very
much like fuck, now it's not going.

Speaker 1 (53:29):
To live, mind can't.

Speaker 3 (53:31):
Yeah, so's it's brought us to this point to find
people who can hold all of that.

Speaker 9 (53:36):
So thank you both.

Speaker 5 (53:37):
Okay, yes, are you welcome, and thank you for holding
me too, because I am a lot and.

Speaker 3 (53:42):
You know, and that's another level of that's another level
of like acceptance, I think, is which a stage in
a relationship that has not spoken about a lot, which
is the part where you're like, wow, it's it's I
you are a human being and there is a lot
level of respect and compassion and love that I have

(54:03):
to recognize that, like, you're.

Speaker 1 (54:04):
Gonna human human, you're human.

Speaker 3 (54:07):
You're gonna be loud, you're gonna be boycious, maybe you'll
be quiet, whatever it is. It's if I if it's
not abriab when I want you to be in the moment, Yeah,
it's not up to me perfectly curating yeah, it's not
a perfectly curated, you know person, and like, neither are you.
And I see there's so much of myself that I
see in Orlando that is I have to shut the
fuck up because I'm like, bitch, you be naked, bitch,

(54:27):
you be this, you know, And it's like, if you're
going to accept me in my wholeness, I have no
choice but to accept you in your wholeness. But I
have so rarely met a man who would accept me
even in my two thirds noess.

Speaker 9 (54:40):
That I didn't even have to, you know what I mean.

Speaker 3 (54:41):
But in this I'm like, damn, he is pretty flexible,
who also is gonna take me? He loves me, So
there is a level of yeah, like a mirroring that
has to happen. And like even if Erica and I
like starting our our brand and a lot of our
like our revival in life, this like rite of passage,
which is good moms, I think is like us being like.

Speaker 9 (55:04):
We're going we don't need boyfriends. We're single moms.

Speaker 3 (55:07):
We're unsensitive, we're single me do what we want, you know,
Like there's always been a kind of like a fuck
you to the patriarchy that we've we've firmly, we've firmly
like built a foundation, which was important, but that we're
shifting and that it requires a softness and it requires
a you know, just like making space for the masculine.

(55:28):
We have created a lot of things together, and so
you know, Orlando, I migrate like integrated into our worlds,
like professionally and personally, which was a shift for us
because we've been so hardcore.

Speaker 9 (55:39):
Like we're single moms.

Speaker 3 (55:40):
We could do everything, but I take our kids skiing,
no men, We could do grocery shopping, we could do everything.

Speaker 9 (55:44):
You know.

Speaker 3 (55:45):
And so even when I was in love and he's like, bitch,
act like you're in love, it's because I was in
love but in ways really trying to like minimize it
because I didn't even know how to show up happy
and in love because I had lived so much like
I'm alone and I am fine and I'm good. I
don't anything, you know, and so like the having to

(56:06):
for like months to be like, what the fucker do
you have an attitude about like you are happy, smile.
It's crazy, but it's like if you don't see yourself
in the happily ever after, really truly, if you haven't
visualized it. Just like if you haven't seen a love
that is something you'd like to replicate, how can we

(56:27):
receive it? And it requires that I go inside myself
and be like, bitch, you're tripping it. Look how hard
it is for you to be happy, and like really
sit in that and like what does that mean?

Speaker 9 (56:37):
Does that not mean?

Speaker 3 (56:38):
That means like I don't really feel like I deserve it?
And that's truly what that means. If you can't really
accept all that is good in your life, it's like
you're not respecting the work that you've done. You're not
respecting the healing that you've done, and so you're not
going to respect the partner that the universe and God
brings you. And so it's like you have to be able.

Speaker 9 (56:52):
To constantly grow and shed and grow and shed individually
and in order to like understand that about another person
into like hold it in one bed and one household.

Speaker 2 (57:04):
Yeah, I don't know anything about one household, but I
will say though, I mean, obviously me and she can
spend a lot of time together, but we also take
space from one another. And I know, like that's you know,
harder to do when you are in one household. But
I do think it is important. I think it's important
for couples, even the health like the healthiest of ones,

(57:27):
like to find comfortability in the missing, even because I
long for him sometimes and in a good.

Speaker 1 (57:38):
And healthy way.

Speaker 2 (57:40):
And then like there are times where like he's like,
I can't come over, Like today he told me he
can't come over tonight, and I found myself go and
then I was like, oh, but yeah, what am I
gonna do tonight? What you gonna do with yourself tonight, bitch?
Oh yeah, you're gonna, Yeah, you're gonna And I just
feel like, I think the space, but also I think

(58:01):
when you are together, making the time, And I think
you and Orlando have done a really beautiful job of
this throughout your relationship is finding the play and finding
just the one on one alone time with each other.
And I think a lot of times couples, if you're
farther into your relationship you have kids, it feels harder
and harder and more impossible, and literally you can make

(58:22):
up every excuse and they feel valid as to why
it's not a possibility at this point, you know, And
so then you go on trips, but then you bring
your kids because you feel bad, or you know, like
you go on a date night but like you're talking
about Johnny's homework that he failed, or you know, like
you're still involving, you know, you're not really taking the

(58:44):
time to really come back to one another. And I
mean that's why this retreat too, is such an opportunity
for couples who haven't made the space, don't even know
where to start to come and like, first of all,
just get away, unplugged, decompress, commit to saying Okay, we're

(59:05):
going to do this for us, and that is it.
We don't know what else we're doing this for, but
we're doing this for us, and then coming and just
being taken care of. I mean, me and Miela have
done fourteen retreats, fourteen retreats at this point, and you know,
as women obviously holding space for women like I see

(59:25):
how powerful it is for people to step away from
their regular scheduled programming and put their trust into this
experience that they've said yes to. So as a couple
saying yes to an experience together, I feel like there's
even more power in that together because you guys are
already SYNCD up, whether or not you're struggling your relationship,

(59:46):
whatever it might be. You guys have chosen one another,
so you already have the spark. The spark is there
even when you think it's died, Like it's there. But
sometimes it really does take you deciding to say, Okay,
we're going to do this for us, We're going to
step into this new space, had this new experience, and
just say yes collectively, because sometimes I feel like like

(01:00:10):
maybe you're you're saying yes, he's saying no, like this
back and forth, whether it's like the kids and like
not agreeing on how to raise your kids, not agreeing
what to have for dinner, not agreeing what to watch
on TV, Like you need a collective yes in your relationship.

Speaker 9 (01:00:24):
And something that's new for both of you, and like
fuck it. You know.

Speaker 5 (01:00:29):
One thing I really tried to like make it a
very important that relationship is like the individuality. It's like
I'm my person, you're your person. When we're together, we're
our that's that's us together. That's a whole different thing.
When Luna's around, that's a whole different thing. And so
like that's why when we're hanging out together, it's just
me and you we're not parents, We're just two.

Speaker 7 (01:00:50):
People that are in a relationship.

Speaker 5 (01:00:52):
And then we can like, I guess we're sort of
kind of role playing is not parents, and so like
we could really enjoy our time together and just focus
on each other without worrying about anything else. That's like
within the world and role playing is really are things,
So like when we could really get into the like
this feel of like, hey, when I'm by myself, I
can really enjoy this time by myself and I can

(01:01:13):
like miss you, and when you're by yourself, I don't
want you thinking and worry about what I'm doing, which
is also why I'd like to have like a lot
of trust in our relationship, because I don't want you
worrying about the relationship when you're when we're not even
in a relationship space. And then when we're together in
a relationship, then we're all about this relationship. We're diving
into it one hundred percent and just enjoying the time
we have without worrying about anything else in the world.

Speaker 6 (01:01:37):
Amen not try That's beautiful.

Speaker 10 (01:01:43):
Well, I want to ask what are some of the
practices that you guys are looking forward to doing, Like,
what are some practices that y'all do that, you know
for sure we're going to do out there.

Speaker 3 (01:01:54):
I think me and Orlando do like a lot of
playing in general, and even I mean Erica and our retreats,
we have a lot of focus on play, you know,
like just really like resetting your nervous system.

Speaker 7 (01:02:04):
How much relationship is fun as fu Yeah, just like
you can.

Speaker 9 (01:02:07):
Bringing the friendship back.

Speaker 3 (01:02:10):
So I know, we have like a lot of sexy
ship plan like Glowing the Dark paint, night body paint.
I know, we have some hand trick dinners where you
can get blindfolded and future partner and just also like sorry,
hey hey, and also like sexy assignments, you know, sending

(01:02:30):
you home, sending you to your room with some work, homework,
and you know.

Speaker 7 (01:02:35):
And.

Speaker 9 (01:02:37):
Oh, I just thought room work.

Speaker 3 (01:02:39):
I just thought about something that might be sexy too,
like every night leaving different challenges on each in each
person's room, or like just specific for them like whatever
Skinny did at twelve am, you know, you know, or
something like that.

Speaker 9 (01:02:56):
Yeah, challenges.

Speaker 3 (01:02:58):
But I'm really excited to just go onto this space
and be able to share in the things that have
worked in like deepening our relationship and even like the
fact that going to Tantra school in the beginning of
our relationship, like literally that first trip we went on
in Mexico for a month. We went on a trip
for a month together in Mexico, like no kids, no friends,
and it was like challenging in ways, but it was

(01:03:19):
like at the end we felt like even when we
got there, like, oh.

Speaker 9 (01:03:22):
My god, we did it. We got to be here
for a month. We're such big kids.

Speaker 3 (01:03:26):
We planned it, you know, and like you know, getting
pulled over together and like just how we navigate through
certain things.

Speaker 9 (01:03:33):
But fuck, were we talking about? What are the things
that oh but just I still forgot challenges.

Speaker 7 (01:03:45):
Yeah, I think we're going to.

Speaker 2 (01:03:48):
I have a question for you as men, because I
think I think women we always have these big ideas
for like spicing up our relationship and bringing new ideas
to the bedroom or just even the bedroom, yes, and
also just in general like wanting to request things but
maybe not always knowing how. What is the best way

(01:04:12):
for a woman to approach their partner when they are
in need of I.

Speaker 1 (01:04:18):
Guess like.

Speaker 2 (01:04:21):
Newness, trying something new that maybe is like different than
anything they've done together. Because I think a lot of
women have been shut down by men, maybe perhaps.

Speaker 1 (01:04:30):
By their approach.

Speaker 2 (01:04:32):
Maybe they've already maybe they've had like discussions, or there's
just something there's like there's just a roadblock in their
form of communication. Like how would you say a woman
should approach her man in this realm? Because I think
even when you think about a couple's retreat, I think
men like a man you sent here, you guys are

(01:04:54):
different type of men. But I would say, like when
a man hears about a couple's retreat, is he worried?

Speaker 1 (01:04:58):
Like, oh my god, what was? Well, we're about to
go do over.

Speaker 5 (01:05:01):
That's what we're here, Charlie Brown will be fucking around.

Speaker 7 (01:05:13):
You don't know, Charlie that niggas really clocked around.

Speaker 1 (01:05:16):
But like yeah, like what is what? How do women
miss the mark with this?

Speaker 10 (01:05:19):
Do you mean specifically intimately or just new things in
the relationship?

Speaker 2 (01:05:23):
Maybe intimately, because that's probably like the biggest thing that women,
you know, feel scared to bring up.

Speaker 7 (01:05:29):
I think that men.

Speaker 5 (01:05:34):
We're like leaders, but we need to see, like we
follow other leaders, so we need to see something by
example and like kind of also got to like wear
us down, like make it be make the introduction to
it like sexy, like we like things to be. We
don't mind being manipulated in the way of like, hey,
I kind of want to do this. I'm gonna rub

(01:05:55):
your feet and then I'm gonna put on this new
thing that I want. I'm gonna put you in the
space of the new thing and then see if you
like it and then make it be a little bit
more sexy. But we kind of need an example, not
just like straight.

Speaker 2 (01:06:06):
Up ass or like can I talk to you?

Speaker 7 (01:06:08):
No? No, do not do last night ever? Say? Can
I don't say talk togger.

Speaker 10 (01:06:15):
Yes, It's not that it's a trigger, it's just like
what are we talking about?

Speaker 6 (01:06:19):
And is it the right time this? Then seriously I.

Speaker 2 (01:06:23):
Realized I'm not that good at those moments. I realized
that one time I woke cam like had just woke.

Speaker 1 (01:06:28):
Up, and I was like, hey, can we talk?

Speaker 2 (01:06:29):
And I was like and then as I said, as
the words came out of my mouth, A can read,
I was like, this was not a good Like he
was like like, not before you open your eyes.

Speaker 7 (01:06:46):
I waited for.

Speaker 6 (01:06:46):
Him to make any of that black woman sitting on
the side of the base.

Speaker 2 (01:06:53):
Let him take a sip with the drink of water
on the edge of the table first.

Speaker 5 (01:06:57):
But yeah, put on some laundry before you launch the laundry,
put on some laingry. Make it sexy before you enter
anything new into into the relationship, because we need to
be warned down, we need to be warmed up and yeah,
we need to be manipulated in this very sexy way
a little bit before you enter with whatever that you
have coming. And like most more times than none, it's

(01:07:19):
the it's a thought. It's talking about it and us
making it up in our own mind instead of showing
an example of what it looks like and then us
getting into it. That's a much better way of going
about it because we kind of need some type of
like leadership or some type of show in the physical
Like women I believe operate much better within their minds

(01:07:41):
and their mentality and the energy. Men operate much better
from in the physical and what we see. So if
you're telling us that you need to talk, but you
look sexy as fucking it's like, all right, we are we.

Speaker 7 (01:07:51):
Talking about now? Like I'm open to it.

Speaker 10 (01:07:53):
Yeah, okays, yes, and everything you said. I think that
there should be scheduled times where people talk.

Speaker 6 (01:08:02):
First of all, and I think that really helps. I
don't think.

Speaker 10 (01:08:07):
Yeah, I think that's like a timing thing because you're
now on one accord as to what we're coming together for,
Whereas at any other time of the day, whether a
man is just getting in from work, or whether he's
about to leave to work, or whether he has to
use the bathroom, you don't know. It could just be
that could be a turnoff right there, because if you
don't have the right answers, men want to have answers.

Speaker 6 (01:08:28):
Yeah, okay, So.

Speaker 10 (01:08:29):
I think that on a date night is a great
time to introduce any new ideas, And I think a
date night should be prioritized and scheduled anyway. So this
is our opportunity to get on one wave first of all,
but then have fun on our wave. Are we surfing
this one? Are we boogie boyding this one? Are we
going about chata?

Speaker 7 (01:08:47):
Are we?

Speaker 6 (01:08:48):
Well, we don't as not, you know.

Speaker 10 (01:08:50):
I think in that fun space of exploration is the
perfect time to plant any seed about ideas, especially sexual
because a man's subconscious mind wants to have sex at
the end.

Speaker 6 (01:09:02):
Of the day anyway.

Speaker 10 (01:09:04):
So if it's something that you've kind of mentioned before,
maybe throughout there. I think those times when we're like
prioritizing each other, that's when you say, I got this idea.

Speaker 6 (01:09:14):
Where do people get ideas? TikTok, I got this idea.
I thought about sharing.

Speaker 10 (01:09:25):
But like you said, you're gonna both be looking nice,
You'll both be feeling good, just like I think asking
those types of questions when the oxytocin is going is
bead time, because it's sometimes we just don't be knowing.
It's like wrapping our mind around what we don't know.
Along with this new thing. Baby, I want to learn
how to rope tie. I need you to tie me up.

(01:09:47):
It's like I gotta work tomorrow. Yeah, we talk about
this on Saturday, so.

Speaker 1 (01:09:53):
You don't want to tie me up tonight, so you
wait till you haven't tie me up.

Speaker 7 (01:09:56):
Ever.

Speaker 3 (01:09:56):
So I was gonna say I was when I was
going to Contra school. It was nice to learn the
exercises and also be applying them with Orlando. So that's
kind of weave into our relationship in a time where
I was learning. And I think sometimes we see it
on the internet. We see meditation and wethink like that's
for some old folks, So that's for like that's something
that like it sounds goofy or silly or cheesy, but

(01:10:17):
I feel like it's definitely something that there are tools
that we have to adopt in today's time that have
our like age old things. So why not dive deeper
into like learning.

Speaker 1 (01:10:28):
Asient practices work for a reason.

Speaker 3 (01:10:30):
For a reason, like a reason about like getting on
the same frequency. Like you've said, that's like there's a
level of like when we're arguing, like physically, I feel
like I feel the distance, the separation. It's like you're
literally creating distance and armor in your energy.

Speaker 9 (01:10:44):
And so sometimes we don't even have.

Speaker 2 (01:10:46):
The tools to just quietly together breathe in the same
sequence so that when we do speak, we're clear and
we're like aligned and we're simply like touch each other
while you're having a serious conversation so that you know
that there's like safetyfety hear and that like we're both
committed to a positive outcome.

Speaker 3 (01:11:03):
Or observing the fact like how difficult it is when
you actually say, what if I did just touch somebody.

Speaker 1 (01:11:08):
When I'm arguing them and really realizing that you're resistant.

Speaker 3 (01:11:12):
Like physically feeling how that feels, because it sometimes is
so difficult, and it's like damn. If you can like
observe those feelings in your body, then you can start
to interact with the reasons why and then try to
do differently and like until it feels normal, you know.
But like if we don't even have the most basic practices,
if we don't take time and space to be like
what do you know?

Speaker 9 (01:11:32):
Let me write that down then.

Speaker 3 (01:11:34):
Because had I not been in school at this like
pivotal time laying the foundation of a relationship, there'd be
like the most slightest things that have saved us, you know,
like just speaking kindly because.

Speaker 7 (01:11:45):
I was ready to be out of here.

Speaker 2 (01:11:48):
I think it's so interesting too, how I mean, I
think the same because I was very much learning the
same practice as you were during the time of early
on in me and chi Keem's relationship, and and also
him also being a tantric man himself and bringing those
elements and just knowing how to hold as I'm learning,
I'm bringing these things to him, and he's already falling

(01:12:10):
into them with me, like he knowing exactly how to
fall into these things with me, and like you know,
being able to I guess share, and that has been
extremely powerful, like yeah, like even right now, I told me.
I was like, I need to go downstairs for a second.
I need to go outside. I need to reset.

Speaker 1 (01:12:28):
I just have to. And like I went down there.

Speaker 2 (01:12:31):
He came with me and we just held each other
and breathed for like two minutes straight, put our foreheads
the fuck together, took turns breathing in and out, and
didn't say a fucking word. I didn't say a word.
And I came back up here and I was like, okay,
I'm ready now.

Speaker 5 (01:12:49):
Actually, the Tanta thing is a very good example of
like leading by example, because when you first told me like, hey,
let's say yap yam and like breathing this for your
other's mouth, and I'm like, I have to go shit
a gym.

Speaker 7 (01:13:00):
I don't I'm not trying to hear this right now.

Speaker 9 (01:13:02):
And even then I feel your resistance.

Speaker 5 (01:13:03):
Right, But then after some time she will go, hey,
come with me, let's sit together, kiss me a little bit,
hold me, and like, hey, I would really like for
you to meditate, but we're already in the stance and
the environment is a ready yeah.

Speaker 7 (01:13:16):
So that's how you get it.

Speaker 5 (01:13:17):
That's how you got to manipulate the situation when it
comes to me, you got to set up the whole
environment for them, put them in this situation, like you
have to kind of already have them a third or
halfway into the new thing that you want to do
before then you you let them know, like hey, let's
try this new thing, and then let's do this new thing,
and like hey, we're already here, let's let's go into it.
And then I was more than reciprocal to it.

Speaker 3 (01:13:39):
Breaking news, guys, breaking news. If you want your relationship
to work, you got to learn some shit and try
some new shit. You can't use all the same old
tools or the no tools and.

Speaker 1 (01:13:51):
Expect the same result a different result.

Speaker 3 (01:13:53):
You have to literally try new things in practices and
act on them, just like going to the gym, and
order for the relationship to be successful, because there are
going to be times where you don't like motherfuckers like
you love them. But then if you can literally allow
a conflict to pull you more apart and more a
part and more apart with now ever having a reset
just because you were unwilling to be like Okay, let's

(01:14:15):
try the fucking forehead thing some point always gonna be
like whatever, fuck it I've never done the ship before.
Fuck it, let's breathe together, okay, you know, like it
sounds like it's.

Speaker 1 (01:14:27):
I mean and it's and it's it sounds crazy.

Speaker 3 (01:14:29):
Or hippy ship or but it is the things that
we've both like. I think that the biggest thing in
like the TNTRA is like some of the practices are
so deeply basic, but it's like that's we're missing the
very basic foundation.

Speaker 7 (01:14:43):
Contact supposed to be basic.

Speaker 9 (01:14:46):
It is, it's what we.

Speaker 3 (01:14:48):
Know innately anyway, and sometimes we fight, we resist the.

Speaker 9 (01:14:54):
Urge to do the thing, like oh this is weird
or this is cheesy.

Speaker 2 (01:14:57):
You know.

Speaker 3 (01:14:58):
I was just thinking about one time we were like
in Union, we were having sex in Orlando, or we
weren't even having sex. Put his hand on my pussy
and he was like speaking to her, and he's like,
you say something, and I literally could not find any words.
And I was like, what the fuck? Why can he
say stuff?

Speaker 9 (01:15:13):
And I can't?

Speaker 3 (01:15:14):
And it was so overwhelming and emotional for me, but
I felt held in it, you know, and like that
he had even started this conversation that I had given
my body to other men and they weren't even thinking
about a kind of damn conversation, you know what I mean.
And to even something so intuitive for him to do
and to say out loud and to just and then
to kind of like walk me through that. I was like,

(01:15:36):
thank you God for like honoring that urge to do that,
and also for me understanding that I had cut her off.

Speaker 9 (01:15:42):
You know what I mean.

Speaker 3 (01:15:42):
I couldn't have a conversation because I wasn't even in
tune in that way.

Speaker 9 (01:15:45):
The line wasn't on.

Speaker 3 (01:15:47):
But I think we are so resistant to say the
thing and do the thing in relationships that we lose
our way, you know. And it's like this is these
basic things could be the fucking either the killer or
I mean, they will not be the killer, but like,
these basic things could be the gift that you give
your relationship that makes it last, or you could just

(01:16:07):
go in blindly like we've been doing and then get
no results.

Speaker 5 (01:16:11):
And that's why me and Shachem is very important to
this couple's a true because one thing we're bringing back
is tangible things and tools that the men can use
in their relationship. It's not a bunch of just feminine
based things, which is fine, which is fine, but we
really need to get back into the true masculinity and
things that men can actually use and actionable things, not

(01:16:31):
just you know, just go and say these things. My
brother's like, no, there's actually men need to move in
the physical and do things physically, and let it be
known that you know a lot of the things that
you're told to do or can do aren't corny or
bad things.

Speaker 7 (01:16:45):
It's actually things that you need to be doing.

Speaker 5 (01:16:48):
And we've been led astray by a lot of toxic
masculinity and a lot of toxic wording from love them
so much, but our ancestors, and we need to take
back the reins on masculinity and manhood and what the
real true masculinity is.

Speaker 7 (01:17:03):
And that's what we're here to do.

Speaker 1 (01:17:04):
What's the real true masculinity? What does that? What does
real true masculinity.

Speaker 9 (01:17:09):
Mean to you?

Speaker 3 (01:17:09):
Before you, guys, go to real true masculinity, pull a
card for me.

Speaker 2 (01:17:13):
We're on the topic if true every card is a
person masculinity.

Speaker 7 (01:17:17):
If you guys, okay, I look at that beautiful the
hang man on one of four cups. Four cups.

Speaker 9 (01:17:33):
Now go ahead into.

Speaker 4 (01:17:35):
A right, truly, Brooks, that looks like that looks like
I literally was like that leanked up against my tree,
trying to figure this ship out.

Speaker 5 (01:17:47):
What does true masculine look like for you, my brother
these days? What is the real masculinity?

Speaker 7 (01:17:50):
Not that move?

Speaker 10 (01:17:51):
To me, true masculinity is the embodiment of all of
the divine elements of the sun. It's life giving, it's
life serving as it brings and cultivates things that are seated.
So I think that's one of the most important things
that we can do, is to come into your life

(01:18:12):
and help cultivate what's already there.

Speaker 6 (01:18:15):
So I think that's one of the things of the sense.

Speaker 10 (01:18:17):
I think it is the embodiment representation son. That is
my philosophy to such a very difficult question.

Speaker 9 (01:18:26):
That is a very complex question.

Speaker 7 (01:18:28):
I've been thinking that.

Speaker 1 (01:18:30):
It's hard questions.

Speaker 5 (01:18:32):
It's a movement with intention and decision making that's in
confidence and not in fair.

Speaker 7 (01:18:38):
I think a lot of the.

Speaker 5 (01:18:39):
Things that we've been taught is based on like men
and fear and fear of like women are hurting them
and how you can do whatever you can to stay
in power to avoid the hurt. And it's like the
pain is meant to be healed, not to be feared.
And so I think that that's more so the position
that I come from when I'm talking about like just
being real and just being true to yourself and your

(01:19:00):
and when you stop moving in a sense of like
being scared that women are going to hurt you, or
the girl that hurts you when you were fourteen years
old is going to break your heart again. It's going
to be so painful, and it's like, it's fine. If
it's painful, you will be fine. Everything will be okay,
and you will find a way to heal and then
move on to the woman that's never going to hurt
you ever again, or if she does hurt you, then
you have the tools which are going to show you

(01:19:21):
in the cubs with truth to.

Speaker 7 (01:19:23):
Overcome and be strong.

Speaker 5 (01:19:25):
And then that is how you become strong in your
relationship and then strong within yourself and then also coming
to the forefront of your confidence.

Speaker 7 (01:19:34):
We're lacking a lot of confidence.

Speaker 5 (01:19:36):
These days in our decision making, not sure what we
should do and following different stupid shit like men on
podcasts and freaking fright and whatever that that old man
was that died sleeping with the Kevin.

Speaker 6 (01:19:50):
Sam I believe that part of the masculine is the
knowing that.

Speaker 10 (01:19:53):
Yeah, that idea of even though it's a modified knowing
on a moment's moment basis.

Speaker 6 (01:19:58):
Throughout your maturation process, it's the knowing.

Speaker 10 (01:20:01):
It's the it's the very linear and concise decision making
that brings about the slow but sure progressions of life.
If we didn't care about the progress, we would just
be And that's that's fine too. If there's something about
the mask and that keeps pulling forward. So I think
that knowing requires us to pull forward efficiently. I think

(01:20:24):
that's really important too.

Speaker 9 (01:20:25):
Do you think that the Kevin Samuels and the followers
of Kevin Samuels thought that they were pushing forward a movement?

Speaker 10 (01:20:32):
Yeah, you know, so they were really Look, if we
want to talk tantra, that means that everything is interweaved
into one. And if everything is intw weaved into one,
then that means that every single seed has a progressive
state and it has a trajectory and it's moving for
some reason. So whatever he did to serve his purpose here,

(01:20:53):
whether it impacted good or bad, the whole point is
that it probably had a paralleled trajectory as somebody who
would be doing good, as somebody who would be lost.
Everybody's going to be ping pong in their way through
this shit, you know. So I think he served a purpose.
It probably just wasn't a purpose for us to necessarily
live off of. You know, there's other people who have

(01:21:14):
some people look at them like they're nuts.

Speaker 6 (01:21:16):
You know.

Speaker 10 (01:21:17):
For instance, Donnie Hathaway is on the mind. I love
Donnie Hathaway. He was a paranoid schizophrenic. He was a
very scary man. So we all have to have somebody
who's making sense somewhere to help us make sense of it,
and we just keep ping pong, ping pong.

Speaker 6 (01:21:31):
I think masculinely loves that. We see that.

Speaker 10 (01:21:34):
Now with longer form content on YouTube, we murder it
every day, like we want to see motivational talking and
Jordan Peterson lectures and philosophy.

Speaker 6 (01:21:42):
And blah blah blah.

Speaker 10 (01:21:43):
And if you go and just type in male motivation
you see these crazy numbers. But it's because we are
after a knowing. There's something that we feel like, even
though we know enough to survive, there's something we feel
like is out there that we have to figure out
so that we can thrive.

Speaker 6 (01:21:59):
That's the main thing.

Speaker 5 (01:22:00):
Yeah, And I think also a lot of young boys.
We missed out on the mentorship phase, that that pivotal
teenage phase where you need a masculine presence in your life.

Speaker 7 (01:22:11):
A lot of us missed out on that.

Speaker 5 (01:22:12):
And so when it comes to like listening to fucking
Kevin Samuels to our lives, it's like that's our mentoring phase.
Like we are we are leaders innately and naturally, but
we're always looking for a mentor to show us how
to lead right. And so when it came to like
these type of like whether it be your your friend
at school or podcast or Instagram with Kevin, then you're

(01:22:34):
always looking for what you can do to optimize your
time on this earth and then get to the pinnacle
of your masculinity as fast.

Speaker 7 (01:22:44):
As you can.

Speaker 9 (01:22:45):
And unfortunately, so many of men discovered Kevin Samuel.

Speaker 5 (01:22:48):
But to Toim's point and but to Sir Kevin's point,
was that we realized that Kevin Samuels is what happens
when men don't speak up against like men like Kevin
Samuels and say like, you're a fucking idiot, that makes
no fucking sense. Nobody told him that early in his life.
So when he got to the point where he got
great beard, a great beard. He led on with that

(01:23:11):
so long and he mastered that type of that type
of whatever the fuck he was doing, and then he
was able to regurgitate it that with such confidence that
it sounded believable. But we have gotten to the point
of realizing that that is what happens when you don't
stop it before it goes too far. And so in essence,
what happened was, I think there are more good people

(01:23:34):
than bad in this world. I think that there are
just more people that don't say anything than people that
do say something.

Speaker 7 (01:23:40):
And so I think that that we've.

Speaker 5 (01:23:43):
Seen Kevin Samuels made a lot of men go, oh,
we need to say something before it goes too far.
We can't just let shit just go about the wayside.
And that was the result of Kevin Samuels after.

Speaker 2 (01:23:53):
His passor what if he was like an actor you guys,
and they like hired him for social as a plant.

Speaker 9 (01:23:58):
So yeah, social observation. He's like a comedian.

Speaker 1 (01:24:02):
You know, as I'm listening to as I'm listening to
your both of.

Speaker 2 (01:24:08):
Your definition of masculinity, and I'm thinking about just the
feminine and just how you know it's evil, how my
version of feminity has evolved personally serving women number one,
which I think has also expanded my my femininity in
ways that I needed deeply more than I ever could
have imagined. Where I joyfully love. I love our retreats

(01:24:30):
with women. I love watering women. I love empowering them.
I love showing them their wild I love showing them
what care looks like. I love being able to I
think what the feminine needs to be cared for by
the feminine at some point. But I also I'm listening
to you know, you talk about, you know, how the

(01:24:52):
masculine is has this like just this natural inclination to
pull forth, and like you know, I guess essentially pull
forth any that are laid, And I think about how
the feminine waters those seeds, right, And I think a
lot of times women in relationships and just in partnerships.

Speaker 1 (01:25:09):
In general, we don't know how to water each other.
Like either the water.

Speaker 2 (01:25:15):
Has run dry because we're now we like we're tired
of your shit and we ain't watering shit over here,
no more or water, or we're watering We're not, we're
watering you incorrectly. There's something that happened the other day
where I felt like I was watering you and and
you said to me, like, what I really.

Speaker 1 (01:25:32):
Need for you from you is for you to.

Speaker 2 (01:25:36):
Like it was essentially like water me and send me off.
Don't tell me like not to go do what I
need to do. Like I think it was something as
it pertained to work, And I thought I was watering
you by saying baby like, don't like I'm gonna take Elliott,
me go rest.

Speaker 1 (01:25:51):
I want you to rest.

Speaker 2 (01:25:52):
I want you to like let me just like nurture you,
like whatever, Like nurture you really is what it was.
And it was like that's not what you needed at
that time. You needed the nurturing, but you needed the
nurturings that you could go out into the world and
get to what it is that you need to get to.

Speaker 1 (01:26:08):
And I think.

Speaker 2 (01:26:10):
Women miss the mark sometimes with that, and we think
that we're doing right by our men in there in
our watering, and then our men don't feel watered, and
then we're so fucking confused, like what the fuck I
did this? I did X, Y, and Z, and but
are you're still not happy? Like I give you pussy,
I did this. I gave that, you know, you know
I could you dinner like and and that's and that's

(01:26:33):
another thing that I'm excited for in this retreat is
like really giving couples the opportunity to playfully inquire in
like are we watering each other the way that we
really want to be.

Speaker 10 (01:26:43):
Watered especially couples we've been together for a while, because
you might think you want the same watering that you
want that three years ago, and it's not.

Speaker 2 (01:26:52):
And then men don't know how to even ask for it,
or women don't know how to ask for it, and
like the conversation, they don't even know how to start
the conversation because it feels heavy, it feels like it
might go wrong. So I feel like in this, in
this space that we're creating, it will give couples an
opportunity to reconnect in that way and be able to

(01:27:15):
speak their truth in a way that you won't feel defensive,
that you won't feel attacked, where it's like no, let's
do it, and let's figure it out and let's play
through it and let's go back.

Speaker 1 (01:27:28):
To our room with assignments.

Speaker 2 (01:27:30):
And and also like the women are going to be
you know, feeding the things in that we know like hey, nigga,
like this is what your bitch wants, and like, hey, bitch,
this is what he needs, you know, So that like
sometimes it's hard to say the thing. It's very important
that you do, but sometimes you do need some like
a a mediator of sorts, a clear a clear playing

(01:27:53):
space where you're like, we're here to put it on
the table.

Speaker 9 (01:27:56):
We have someone else.

Speaker 2 (01:27:57):
It's all and it's all love and it's all play
and we're all we're all gonna be a paradise. So
it's just like the stakes are seem like in a
better playing field. When you're working, you got kids screaming,
and dinner has been made.

Speaker 9 (01:28:08):
You know.

Speaker 3 (01:28:08):
It's like I'm also excited to learn, like to learn
from the couple who've been together a really long time,
because I think that's something we missed too in this community,
is like exchange of like what's working for you. We're
in a culture of like god, do what the wife
says or also like you know, like that wife, happy life. Yeah,
like you don't have sex after a certain amount of time,
you don't feel the same way they get it on

(01:28:29):
your fucking nerves. But it's like yeah, like I don't know,
bringing it back and being able to learn from other
people and what like bringing back the community part of
like love, you know how, like passing around the secrets
that work and having open conversations so you can be
accountable and also be like, oh, this is like maybe
your brother has a he can explain something to your

(01:28:50):
you know, your somebody else in a way that you
didn't understand before.

Speaker 10 (01:28:53):
You know what I mean, something different when it's from
someone else, And it doesn't even have to be the
people leading liberatory.

Speaker 6 (01:28:59):
It could be somebody you something.

Speaker 9 (01:29:00):
Sitting next to you at the dinner table. So that's
always that way.

Speaker 3 (01:29:03):
There's never a time I leave without also getting the medicine.
So there's something about like doing healing in community in general,
which is I think is going to be really special too,
And like not to mention like the sex magic that
happens when you're exchanging in a place where your nervous
system is arrested and you're like, that's manifest some shit
while I'm in the jungle while we're making love, you know,
and like it's fruitful there and just like just like

(01:29:25):
you know, like the entity is it like can can
blossom into something tangible if you harness your energy in
a way that's fruitful.

Speaker 5 (01:29:34):
Yeah, I can't wait for the men to see how
much strength there is in the healing and coming to
something like this, because you know a lot of men
hesitations just feel like things are a waste of time,
and we really like to optimize on our time and
make sure like we've got shit going on and we're
not just bullshit.

Speaker 3 (01:29:52):
And this is gonna be a vacation that you don't
even have to plan. You're gonna be taken care of,
it's gonna be sexy, it's gonna be fun.

Speaker 9 (01:29:58):
We're gonna explore the land.

Speaker 7 (01:30:00):
And just let us take care of your relationship.

Speaker 3 (01:30:02):
Yeah, let us take care of you so that you
could take care of your relationship. You know, like I'm
gonna give you the tools and I'm gonna make sure
you don't have to worry about shit.

Speaker 9 (01:30:09):
You're gonna be.

Speaker 3 (01:30:10):
Fed, you're gonna be happy, you're gonna be sunshining, you're
gonna be accommodated.

Speaker 7 (01:30:14):
You don't feel stronger, Yeah, it's.

Speaker 3 (01:30:15):
Just gonna feel back, Phil come back feeling in tune
and lighter and closer and closer that you could like
go back to the into the world and kick ass
and take you know, go get with whatever's on the
table that you haven't been getting because you're too caught
up in the fog.

Speaker 9 (01:30:34):
I got the Hangedman. You want to hear it? Tit
tarot time.

Speaker 3 (01:30:50):
The Hangman reminds you that sometimes you have to put
everything on hold before you can take the next step,
or the universe will do it on your behalf, and
it may not always be at the most convenient time.
You may have heard the saying what got you here
won't get you there, and that indeed is a play
in this card. The Hangman calls for you to release
the old mental models and behavior patterns that no longer

(01:31:11):
serve you, so you can see the world from a
new perspective and embrace new opportunities that would have otherwise
been hidden from you if you didn't hit the brakes.

Speaker 9 (01:31:19):
Wow, here's the thing.

Speaker 3 (01:31:21):
These pauses can be voluntary or involuntary. If you tune
in with your intuition, you'll start to have a sense
for when it's time to hit the brakes and put
things on hold before things get out of hand.

Speaker 9 (01:31:32):
But if you're out of.

Speaker 3 (01:31:34):
Alignment and obvious and oblivious to those intuitive signs, the
universe will probably put things on hold for you in
the form of continued obstacles, ill health, and breakdowns. When
you sense the pause coming, pay attention to it. Otherwise
the universe will turn up the volume until you can't
ignore it any longer. When you disappears, your project and
activities may be coming to an unexpected and abrupt halt.

(01:31:55):
Don't keep pushing forward hoping that the force will drive
you to where you want to go. That surrender to
the opportunity to pause and view it as a chance
to reassess and reevaluate where you are on your path.
Something new is emerging and you won't allow won't be
able to see unless you allow the time and space
for it to come through.

Speaker 1 (01:32:15):
Time and space. I think that's all covers everything. We
so many of the things we just talked about.

Speaker 2 (01:32:20):
Got to make the time and space for clarity.

Speaker 7 (01:32:24):
I sheeted that one.

Speaker 2 (01:32:28):
And my love. You pulled the four of Cups and
this no I.

Speaker 5 (01:32:34):
Like about this card. It's like you already got three cups.
There's something like I think you need another cup.

Speaker 3 (01:32:40):
You're the cups are dealing in emotions.

Speaker 2 (01:32:44):
And when the four of Cups turns up in a terror,
reading new invitations and opportunities are flowing to you, but
for now you're saying no and turning them away. Perhaps
the prospects don't interest you, or your cup is full,
or you already have too much on your plate. Use
discernment to decide on what is truly important to you,
and don't be afraid to decline new projects that don't
align with your future path. The Four of Cups can

(01:33:05):
appear when you are bored or dissatisfied with your everyday life.
You may feel disengaged, apathetic, or unmotivated. Maybe life has
become dull. The Four of Cups invites you to bring
your attention inward and reevaluate your situation to find a
deeper meaning in what you do. You may have found
yourself disconnected from your emotional self and inner truth, and
need to re establish this connection so you can get

(01:33:26):
a greater sense of purpose and direction. What else, However,
if you missed the Four of Cups may show that
you have shut yourself off from new opportunities because you
have been hurt or rejected before. The man in this
card has his arms crossed as if protecting himself and
closing off from the external world. You may have had
a relationship end and heartbreak, or experienced failoring your career,

(01:33:48):
and now you want to avoid getting in the same predicament. However,
you may miss out on new opportunities that are excellent
fit for you. Check in on a sole level in
question whether shutting yourself down is the best course of
action or if it's time to open up to the
possibilities available to you.

Speaker 9 (01:34:05):
Wow, we're telling cards.

Speaker 3 (01:34:07):
If you were resisting, let this be a sign that
maybe it's time to pivot and try something new, like
coming on the couple's retreat. Yeah, June fourteenth to the nineteenth. Yes,
you can make payments. It's around the corner. There are
big discounts. We're gonna be there, We're going to be
having fun. It's gonna be good food.

Speaker 1 (01:34:24):
We took over this whole property. It's where we do
all of our retreats.

Speaker 2 (01:34:28):
It's this beautiful sacred grounds and this container that we create.

Speaker 1 (01:34:33):
It's just us and we.

Speaker 3 (01:34:35):
Only have a limited space amount. Like it's very we're
close to the date. Some people dropped out, so we
have a couple of spots left. But I wouldn't hesitate,
I wouldn't procrastinate. Let this be a sign and let
your intuition lead you on vacation with us.

Speaker 6 (01:34:50):
Kings.

Speaker 10 (01:34:51):
Please open up your minds and your first eye because
we need this, We need these opportunities to hold space
for the new versions of ourselves. It's going to be
a safe space to be whoever you want to be,
for your partner to be whoever you want to be.
I think that's very important that we hold space for
the new versions of each other because we keep going together,
we keep learning these new tools, and we just keep

(01:35:12):
on moving forward together.

Speaker 6 (01:35:14):
So please invest in this.

Speaker 10 (01:35:16):
It's going to be that memory that you look back
on and say, man, remember when we was doing the
bread stuff in the jungle naked? Oh shoot, maybe we
not naked, Maybe we just chilling. But enjoy that, you know.
Just invest that in yourselves, invest that in your play
and your enjoyment and in your household.

Speaker 5 (01:35:33):
Yeah, that's got a little affirmation right there. Leave space
for the you part of yourself is.

Speaker 3 (01:35:39):
That the affirmation. Leave space for the new version of yourself,
Leave space.

Speaker 6 (01:35:45):
For the open space. How about hold space.

Speaker 9 (01:35:47):
For the new version of Hold space for the new
versions of yourself.

Speaker 1 (01:35:50):
Because these are couples.

Speaker 10 (01:35:52):
You might want to get to the jungle and want
to do some ninja shit with me, And she can't
be judging you for now. If my nigga wants to
be eat barefoot with a bow staff underneath these trees,
you got to say, because Kim.

Speaker 2 (01:36:04):
Will definitely be barefoot under a tree with a bow
staff at the retreat, probably with knives and any other
weapon he forms finds out there.

Speaker 10 (01:36:13):
And here, I want you there with me. I won't
be naked at that time. And yes, yes, hold space
for all these new innerversions of each other.

Speaker 3 (01:36:24):
Yes, yes, thank you guys for joining us.

Speaker 9 (01:36:29):
This was fun.

Speaker 6 (01:36:29):
Thank you for having us.

Speaker 10 (01:36:30):
I get to be in this special place, wrought out
so many good memories.

Speaker 2 (01:36:35):
This is a sacred place, Yes, I think in that
I think that's why I was nervous, because this has
been such a sacred space and for me and Jamila,
and I'm so grateful to share this with such a
sacred lover and love and yeah, and this, this beautiful
energy and entity that we've created all all our own

(01:36:56):
and so being able to share it with my tribe
is making me a little nervous.

Speaker 7 (01:37:03):
Sharika, but I did it.

Speaker 3 (01:37:06):
No, it's not Ska, Yes, Shamira that's really powerful.

Speaker 9 (01:37:15):
It's really powerful. Tell the people where they can find you.

Speaker 10 (01:37:20):
You can find me under Sha Kim Howees. Oh, I'll
do it right now, but I might cause dogs to bark.

Speaker 1 (01:37:28):
He does do that and dogs are parking.

Speaker 9 (01:37:32):
That's true.

Speaker 7 (01:37:34):
You can find this Big Dick Babbage at w H Underscore.

Speaker 3 (01:37:38):
Orlando roy Or on our other podcast that we have together, love.

Speaker 5 (01:37:42):
Like this in our relationship Instagram Hucci Mom and Dad.

Speaker 7 (01:37:47):
Oh yeah, the best Instagram name on the planet.

Speaker 9 (01:37:52):
Thank you guys for joining us.

Speaker 3 (01:37:54):
If you're watching this and you're in Atlanta, we're going
to be in Atlanta April twenty six. If you're in Charlotte,
we're gonna be and Charlotte May second with Mom Juice. Also,
we're gonna be in Atlanta with Black Effect Podcast Festival.
We're gonna have a special guest. We're gonna turn up.
It's a whole festival of the podcast. A podcast is
really gonna be I've never been to one. Excited me too.
I'm excited a lot of talking people. You know, we're

(01:38:16):
gonna come with some heat, some surprises. Yeah, we have
some good surprises for you guys. And then we're gonna
go to Charlotte May second and hang out with Mom Juice,
So check that out too.

Speaker 9 (01:38:26):
You know we on touring shit, so.

Speaker 2 (01:38:27):
We have all the links in this episode description, so
come pull up, come join the couple's retreat. Make sure
you click the link in this episode description to get
the discount code, which is pleasure. Say again pleasure, Oh
use pleasure, and I promise you have a pleasure experience.

Speaker 1 (01:38:45):
We can see all those dollars drop off the amount.

Speaker 9 (01:38:50):
Yeah, I have a beautiful day and love you.

Speaker 11 (01:38:55):
Yeah, Gona been so good.

Speaker 7 (01:38:57):
Can't you tell?

Speaker 11 (01:38:58):
I went through routs until I found out Well, may
might have been known earth. I used to be broken
hell now got the blues in to like Beyonce Jasell
throat shot or popping his cow wearing our voices. Patriarchy
kept it in the box to exploit its women put
the pe in power, so it's pointless.

Speaker 1 (01:39:14):
They want me to be good, So I mean bad choices.

Speaker 11 (01:39:17):
Bad mom, not a bad mom, but a bad mom.
It He's in on the cannabis in ther backbone, walked
in bosss cap and I blew his cat bolls hot dog.

Speaker 1 (01:39:25):
Now I'm immune to the cat.

Speaker 11 (01:39:27):
Called her being a waisted straight to it like a
dollar sign. Mother, rent the lover when too. It is
like a water sign.

Speaker 1 (01:39:32):
Where you're rent the winter essential will when.

Speaker 7 (01:39:34):
The summer time. I do it all.

Speaker 1 (01:39:36):
Ain't know when that needs to run it by

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Episode Transcript

Hosts And Creators

Erica Dickerson

Jamilah Mapp

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