Geriatric Bad Bih

Shout out to all the elderly bad b*tches! 

This week, Good Moms explore what it means to revisit old passions with fresh eyes, the importance of community support when stepping into new (and old) chapters of your life, and the reality of balancing dreams with everyday responsibilities. 

Timestamps:

(02:10) gray hair, and the quest for youthful vibes  

(10:35) Erica’s return to acting: first in-person audition in six years  

(18:45) Wrestling with rejection, pressure, and rediscovering joy in creativity  

(26:09) Tabitha Brown is rightttttt, some of you need to keep that job, no shade! 

(27:00)  How openly sharing fears and progress within supportive communities (like our "Girl Guess What?" Discord channel) helps sustain motivation and combats the loneliness inherent in creative work.  

(34:20) Conversations with kids about dreams, affirmations, and fear  

(35:48) Saying YES to delusion but also saying YES to reality! 

(36:33) RIP BADDIE WINKLE , that baddest old lady on the net! 

(42:15) Embracing imperfection: why the process beats perfection every time.

43:52- Why the ages 35-40 are critical for your geriatric bad bitch-dom! 

(46:30) Milah is getting an age change

(47:22) CLT + ALT + DEL Theory 

(52:23) Bad choice of the week Segment

(57:30) Tarot Segment

Connect With Us:

@GoodMoms_BadChoices

@TheGoodVibeRetreat

@Good.GoodMedia

@WatchErica

@Milah_Mapp

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See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Once upon a time there was a good old traditional housewife.
She couldn't. She cleaned and cared for her children and
the man of the house, and of course she didn't
talk back. She was both obedient and soft by nature.
She was a good woman who always made good choices.

Speaker 2 (00:17):
We're good mom's bad choices.

Speaker 3 (00:18):
Who single mom who said fuck the patriarchy, shared all
their bad choices and.

Speaker 4 (00:22):
Sound out they were so bad.

Speaker 3 (00:23):
After all, we're experts, overshares and your new besties.

Speaker 4 (00:26):
Sit back and enjoy the ride.

Speaker 2 (00:28):
I can do it.

Speaker 4 (00:32):
Welcome back to good Mom's bad Choices.

Speaker 2 (00:34):
I'm Erica and I'm Nila.

Speaker 4 (00:36):
Happy humpday, bitchous.

Speaker 2 (00:37):
Happy hump day, y'all.

Speaker 4 (00:40):
How you doing.

Speaker 2 (00:41):
I'm doing pretty good. You look pretty thank you.

Speaker 4 (00:43):
Yeah. Orlando said, you look like young like that, but
you do. I'm not young. You just look you kind
of look like I guess you kind of like a teenager,
but like a youthful not like yeah, like beautifully youthful?

Speaker 2 (00:57):
Is it like because it's half a pack?

Speaker 4 (00:58):
Is a ponytail situation?

Speaker 2 (01:00):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (01:01):
Is this is this where I'm at in life? Like
I had their ponytail with youthful.

Speaker 4 (01:05):
Well, I'm wearing my hair down because bitch, I put
my pulled my hair back the other day and I'm
the grays that have accumulated around my fucking hairline since
I had took my braids out. I was like, are
the braids pulling grays out of my head? Like I
swear to God? And when I put them and I
did not have this many grays, And when I took
them out, I had like unearthed more grains.

Speaker 2 (01:25):
I don't know if I don't know if braids work
like that.

Speaker 3 (01:27):
I think it's I think that they've been like pulling
at the root, pulling, pulling the grays out.

Speaker 2 (01:32):
Yes, I don't know exactly.

Speaker 4 (01:34):
About going blonde again, I've been read for like two
almost two years now, and so that I can blend
them with the end kind of helps hide the grays.
But I just took new headshots and my hair's red,
so I.

Speaker 2 (01:47):
Can't take more.

Speaker 4 (01:49):
They're expensive. And that's the thing about acting that I remember,
like not like really hating, was like once you took
a headshot your age, David your agent being like, well,
you can't change your hair, Yeah, you have this hairstyle here,
although I don't know if that's still the same anymore.
Like I feel like, well, if you wanted this color, bitch,
change it, like get created. It's because casting directors are

(02:10):
not creative and they need to see.

Speaker 2 (02:12):
Exactly how you look.

Speaker 3 (02:13):
Yeah, I think you could always get blonde and get
new pictures by David.

Speaker 4 (02:18):
I just get a wig or a wig. Just have
my red wig on, but have blonde hair underneath.

Speaker 3 (02:23):
You looked at Brittany Runners that rig wig all the time.
That afro wigs looks like a wig to me. Yeah,
it's too perfect. You know what confirmed it was wig?
When she was doing all that back and forth with
the baby, she had the I have wig braids.

Speaker 4 (02:37):
Oh, she had braids on.

Speaker 3 (02:38):
They were like just straight backs. That's just probably a wig.
It's a cute wig. Maybe I need to get a
wig for real. I took my hair down because the
fucking brading lady was like two hours late, and me
and Danielle called ourselves splitting the travel fee. She came
like two hours late. I was already tired. I was like,

(02:59):
I only taking out the front. I was only at
the front, rebraided, and now she decided to go and
I wasn't gonna go. I was like, fuck it I'm
gonna take them all my hair. No, you had the
bob for like three days, no, like one day.

Speaker 2 (03:12):
I called her that night. I was like, call me back, bitch,
what are you doing with your hair?

Speaker 4 (03:16):
Like, what are you trying to get to? What's like
the goal? I don't know or theneath hair.

Speaker 3 (03:20):
I was just I just we were retreating so back
to back that I just kept getting braids, and we're
about to retreat again. So I'm gonna keep it. I'm
gonna get it professionally done. I'm gonna see how it
looks with like a professional press out because I don't
have those skills at all anymore, and my hair is
not trained, and then I don't have to.

Speaker 4 (03:34):
Get it like cut like a certain way.

Speaker 2 (03:35):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (03:36):
And then also my hair is like half permed, half natural,
and it's horrible, so I'm probably gonna cut the shit
off right after BALI. Yeah, I'll just go back to
having no hair because that's what looks best on me,
and I'm gonna only I can only rock that for
so much longer. I think, like the short hair used
to make me look like more distinct and older, but
now I'm actually older, so I would not have.

Speaker 4 (03:57):
To grow my hair out, so now I need to
look younger. Yeah, now you need a pony tail. I
need a pony Yeah. Next you're gonna have a fucking
scrunchy in your hair.

Speaker 2 (04:04):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (04:05):
When I turned forty and I'm wearing only scrunches, You're
gonna know why bows and scrunchies.

Speaker 2 (04:09):
You're gonna know why? How are you? What's been going on?

Speaker 4 (04:14):
I'm good, I'm I'm just actually, I mean, if you're
watching YouTube, I'm wearing my leopard cat something dressed. And
I had this in my car because I recently had
an audition yesterday. And yeah, I've been like slowly creeping
my way back into that world of auditioning again, and

(04:37):
I feel really good about it. Like it was I
had this audition in person. It's my first in person audition.
And probably I said five years, but now i've been
thinking about it, it might be like six years. Because
we've been podcasting for how many years? Seven seven and
a half going on eight. Yeah, and I think I
stopped acting like probably.

Speaker 2 (04:55):
Like year one of our of us, maybe year two,
maybe second year, but maybe a lot.

Speaker 3 (05:00):
I feel like at that point too, a lot of
auditions started to be virtual like yeah, like you said
them to them.

Speaker 2 (05:07):
Especially after twenty twenty, there was.

Speaker 4 (05:08):
I didn't see I did an audition in twenty twenty.
I stopped auditing like twenty nineteen.

Speaker 2 (05:14):
Yeah, a lot of yeah, a lot of them are
self tapes.

Speaker 4 (05:17):
Yeah, and so like I've been doing self tapes for
the past few months like here and there, but this
was my first in person audition, and that shit felt
so different.

Speaker 2 (05:24):
It hits different.

Speaker 4 (05:25):
It felt so different, it felt so good. And I've
been just like easing my way back in because when
I left acting, I like felt really disheartened. I really
felt like, maybe this is just not my calling. Maybe,
like you know, some people you gotta have like real
conversations between maybe you don't, but like you know some

(05:46):
people like who are trying to be like rappers and shit,
You're like, baby, this is ain't good. This is not
your calling. Baby.

Speaker 2 (05:51):
Never I've never had the heart to tell anybody.

Speaker 4 (05:54):
You know, because like, who are you to tell someone call?
I'll do it, right me. But like I think sometimes
like you have to have these real conversations with yourself, right,
Like it's maybe it's not about your call, it's like
are you going to do have the time to invest
in this right now. So that's where I kind of was,
I guess in twenty nineteen, because I've been acting since
I was as a kid, and I just I've had moments.

(06:14):
I've had little breaks here and there, but just like
nothing that I felt was like substantial enough for to
like keep me going in this direction for another however
many years I was going to do it, and so
I was kind of sad. But I think good moms
like took over our lives and this has been such
a masterclass of like knowing myself and understanding myself, and

(06:36):
I think that was like the missing piece for me
as an actor. It was like I really didn't know
who I was, So there was like this and granted,
when you're acting, you're playing other people, but there's there's
still like a knowingness of yourself in order to be
able to at least for me. I'm not necessary for
other actors, but at least for me that I think
that that was been That's been the missing piece for

(06:57):
me in my art in that space, and so going
back into it, it just feels different. Like when I
went to the audition, I walked in and I could
hear a girl was auditioning in the room. They were
giving her notes and I was like, okay, let me
step outside because I don't even want to hear.

Speaker 2 (07:11):
I don't want to hear it contaminate.

Speaker 4 (07:13):
But the way God had like lined up this day
for me, like I got I was. I got there
like right on time, but I got a parking spot
right in front. And it was at CBS Radford, so
it's like there's like no parking over there. And I
was like, Okay, we're gonna make this easy for myself.
It was so fucking hot. I was wearing this dress,
walking in the most uncomfortable shoes. Look at they fucking whatever.

(07:34):
They tore up my feet. But when I got in there,
it was just like it was nice and cool. There
was someone in there. I walked out, I went to
the bathroom. When I walked out of the bathroom, like
she was leaving, I was like, perfect. It felt like
it was just like he's my audition and that's what
I needed. And I went in there and I fucking
killed it.

Speaker 3 (07:53):
I did so I did so well And welcoming you
back to the space and it feels really really good
to be in person. We talk to a lot of
actors they really like the the like the self tape
element because it just it requires less of your day, right,
Like you're driving across LA to go to a fucking.

Speaker 4 (08:11):
Santa Monica, you know, and.

Speaker 2 (08:13):
It's always at four.

Speaker 4 (08:14):
It's always at the worst time. Yeah, like three pm
when I go to pick up my kid. So granted,
like I know that, I like I'm on a high
of like in personal auditions. I don't know how long
this high will last, but I just know I appreciated that,
and it made me think about just how many of
us have these dreams and passions that we start in

(08:37):
our in our youth or like maybe in our early twenties,
and then like life hits and you're like, shit, I
gotta get real. I gotta get or maybe maybe it's
not even about getting real. It's just like this isn't
working for me right now. And sometimes it's like it's
not working for you in that version of yourself or
in this point in your life, but it doesn't mean
it can't work. And I think that that's been like

(08:57):
the message for me in this new chapt is like
I'm walking into this a total like a different Erica,
but a different version of myself. I when I was
acting before, I had put so much pressure on myself
every time I went in an audition, and like I
didn't get a call back like it was it was
started to really fuck with me. And I've been doing
it for years and it didn't fuck with me for

(09:17):
a long time, but towards the end, it was like
this is too much, Like I can't deal with this
rejection anymore in my life. And now I'm like I'm
just like like going in and like releasing it, you know.
And it's like it's like if you just get to play.
And I started to play, and I think playing in
person with someone else was like part of the reason

(09:38):
it felt really good, whereas like when I'm doing like
self tapes, I am playing with someone but just it's
just not the same energy.

Speaker 3 (09:44):
Yeah, you don't feel like the nerves, the nerves, it
doesn't feel as like yeah, like the adrenaline is probably
not going as hard.

Speaker 4 (09:50):
Yeah, there's like that feeling that I've I just I
remember so so clearly and like I almost forgot how
all big of a part of this, of this portion
of my life that acting has taken because I've stepped
away for the last six years, and but I've been
acting my whole fucking life and I almost forgot, like

(10:13):
I was like, oh yeah, this, oh yeah, this other
thing that I do. Yeah, and it's like it's feels
it just feels really good. And it just made me
think about how many mothers, not even mothers, but I
would say a lot of moms, how we've we we
side step our dreams or we put our dreams on hold.
And granted, sometimes you have to like you have to

(10:34):
like you know, there's a lot going on, but that
I don't know this like come back to it, you know,
come back to it, revisit it, and maybe it is
maybe that is a time in your life that's done.
But for me, it feels really it feels really good,
and I feel really supported. And I had so many
people in my dms like cheering me on, and it's

(10:55):
like a level of like support that i've that I
have now because of maybe the platform that I have
now and also maybe just me sharing vulnerably, like my
fear around this and like allowing people into my process
as like stepping into this new form of art or
this former it's not new, but yeah new for me. Yeah,

(11:17):
and being honest about like my fears, being honest about like,
you know, some days I feel confident in something, you know,
and like allowing people to support me, you know, whereas
I think a lot of times we feel like we
have to like become masters in silence or we can't
like share the journey of to the win because it
makes us look like we're not masters, you know, like

(11:40):
we're not already walking.

Speaker 3 (11:41):
In like everybody just shows up an expert about suddenly
Eric is on a TV show. There's no process to it,
and like we've normalized that in ways, and so.

Speaker 4 (11:50):
I'm actually enjoying. I think I'm going to share more
about it, just the journey of it, because it's like
acting is hard. It is like a being a creator
in in in general, there's a lot of rejection and
even Iri like, so did you get it? Did you
get this show? I'm like, Iri, listen, I'm gonna do
a lot of auditioning. I'm not going to get things right.
And like I'm glad that I even get to show
her that too, because I think it's you know, I

(12:11):
think as a child, I didn't even understand that. And
I started acting when I was like eight years old,
so like the rejection part like took pros. Yeah, yeah,
so it's just.

Speaker 2 (12:20):
Like this is fun.

Speaker 3 (12:20):
And then one day you're on set and you're like, oh,
that's cool, but it's not like it's not like uh,
you know, like livered. You're not gonna like die without
it because you're just playing, you know, during the next
thing the next day. That's interesting to have that observation,
like doing it as a child and then just to
understand how serious we start to take things and how
taking things so seriously kind of starts.

Speaker 2 (12:40):
To steal the joy.

Speaker 3 (12:42):
Fuck it up, steals the joy away from just knowing
it like as a child, because I auditioned a lot
as a child, and like yeah, there's like even thinking
like the fear I have now of like someone's like
okay action, I'm like eugh, But like that is it's
like what is the awareness that we grow into that
starts to make it like so fair, feel so stressful,
such so heavy, like so weighted, so heavily on us,

(13:04):
And then what is this other piece about thinking that
we have to show up an expert and not like
the process between it and like dub bitch, Like that's
the whole.

Speaker 4 (13:14):
I mean, and when you share the process, you actually
get like literally energetically in the world, so much more
support to like to actually propel you to where you
want to be. You know, That's what I was feeling,
like when people were like messaging me like, oh my god,
that's so great, I was like, wow, thank you, thank you,
Like yes, yes, actually I need this, especially in the
beginning of my process. Now it's kind of like makes

(13:35):
me think of like when we when I first started dating,
and you know, I joined Tinder, where I needed the
validation a little bit, like it's it's less about validation
and more more so.

Speaker 2 (13:44):
Based firm like oh okay, like it's okay to talk
about this. It's okay. Someone says, oh I really needed
to hear that, or whatever the fuck. It's true.

Speaker 3 (13:52):
I think we underestimate the community piece and like how
much like encourage, like how much it drives you. And yeah,
that's a good I'm happy that you like put that perspective,
because that is I think it is important to revisit
things as like with a new eyes and just removing
a lot of the pressure because we do live in
a society that aid tells you that you can't master

(14:16):
more than one thing.

Speaker 2 (14:17):
It's like, well, if you do this, if you podcast,
you podcasts, it's.

Speaker 3 (14:19):
Like, which I had a whole lot, Like there's so
much other there's so many other parts of me and
as a podcaster and as an author and now as
these other things. It's like, of course if it contribute
to other creative outlets, because I'm a creative in all
the ways, like as a vessel. So it's nice to
see you like take that perspective and then like remind
me even you know, and even I re see it.

(14:42):
The SA We're in the car, me and Luna and
we're listening to the radio. I think we're listening to
like Big Boy or something, and I was like, I
think I want to be in the radio, and Linda
is like, I think I want to be an actress,
but I know that's not gonna happen. I said, speak
for yourself, baby, because everything I say I want, I get.
And I was like, you really have to be aware
of like if you want to be an actress, if
you want to be an actor, say you want to

(15:03):
be an actor. I was like, and then I was like,
I'm an actor, and then she was like repeating after
me like, oh no. I was like, I'm going to
be an actor and she's like, I'm going to be
an actor. I was like, no, say I am an actor,
Like I am an actor, and I was like I
just started saying all these things that I wanted to,
like that I wanted to be as if they were
already existing. And I was talking to her and I
was like, when I was little, I used to like
accept awards, and like, I feel like a lot of
that contributed to like where I'm at. I was like,

(15:25):
I wanted to be a writer and I didn't know
how the fuck that was gonna happen, but I'm a
writer now.

Speaker 2 (15:28):
I was like, you really have to be careful.

Speaker 3 (15:30):
And I was telling her like envisioning, embodying, and I
was like, and using your imagination to feel how it feels.
And I was like, things are scary, but you have
to always know that you're capable. And I was just
like talking to her, and you know a lot of
times she's like, Okay, wait, shut up, but I'm like,
even if you get like one percent of what I'm getting,
you know, and even just sharing that with her, I
don't even know what the fuck made me say that

(15:51):
I was like, I want to be the radio. I
think She's like, I want to do this. I was
like you, well you can, and I was like, we
got to get away. You got to get over this
fear and you got to just say fuck the fear
and push past it. But it's nice to be in
the position to a be able to revisit things, have
a community to support you, and then also be and
it's doing something, not from the beginning, but starting over

(16:12):
with something and having our child, your child bear witness
because it kind of reminds you of like where you
were as a child and how you didn't you didn't
take on those l's or you didn't even think of
them as l's. You're just doing something to do it
and it's fun and your mom does your hair and
you show up and you go in there and like
you know, as adults, we lose that because things get
too serious. And it's the same as like even relationships,

(16:34):
things get too serious to think about bills and Nicholas.
You are not doing shit, You're not doing this, and
it's like we always I think the biggest, the coolest
blessing about having a kid is it kind of pulls
you to always come back to that childlike version of
yourself and to sit in like what is the difference
between now and then?

Speaker 2 (16:50):
Oh, bitch, I'm a stress a bucket full of stress now,
and it's like, fuck all that.

Speaker 4 (16:57):
When I got back from my audition, of course, was like,
so did you shoot it? I was like, no, babe,
it was an audition and she's like, oh, those are
sides and I was like, yeah, so can we read them?
And so like we we're reading them and in one
of the size it says something like something about like
bitches and it was her line, and she was like
she tried to skip over it, and I was like,

(17:17):
why didn't you say it? She said, and she was
like and I was like, okay, but I can tell
like she was like really into it. She wanted to
keep doing it over and over again, and I am.
I am grateful that I can share that with her,
that like, yeah, I'm not going to win every time.
I'm not gonna like get every part. That's just not
the process. And her can and she can see how

(17:38):
resilient I am when it doesn't go my way and
that I keep going even still. And actually this particular
line of work really shows you that because it is
a constant release of like going in and doing the work,
prep preparing, preparing as if you've gotten the role, and
then releasing it and then you never get to do
it and you like you have to like move on

(17:59):
from it. But thinking about the community and having the
community or like I've always had community, it's just I
haven't always asked for the support in that way. I mean,
obviously Instagram has made it much different. And also like
thinking about but even like I shared it in our
group text with our tribe, like I shared it with
my friends because a I was excited to share share

(18:21):
it and then when I got positive feedback, it made
me feel good, you know. And so I was thinking
also like we have this in our Discord channel, shout
out to our tribe on Discord, we have a channel
called girl Guess What. And I was thinking about that
yesterday and I was like, this is like girl Guess What,
Like this is why these channels are important, because we
share in our girl Guess What channel, like, Hey, bitch,

(18:42):
guess what I just did today, and everyone says, oh
my god, that's amazing, Like you need people, even if
it's strangers on the internet. Or strangers on the discord
that are like future sisters to hype you up, especially
when you're, like I guess, entering into a new news space. Yeah,
I mean whether not even just a new space. Sometimes
you need it just in life in general. But it

(19:04):
really helps, and it's helping me stay ignited because I know,
like that there'll be moments in this journey where I'm like,
you know, I'll feel defeated, like I really wanted to
roll and I didn't get it, or like I'm tired
and I don't feel like going on a fucking audition
because I've just got back from working recording three episodes

(19:24):
or whatever, mommy all day, whatever the fuck. But it's
like those it's those moments that I'm like trying to
stay presentent so that I can come back to that
feeling that I felt when I left that audition, that
first audition after six years, and remind myself why it
is I'm doing it, because I think that's where I
lost sight of. That's what I lost sight of in
my journey into the space and my journey out of it.

(19:45):
When I started podcasting, it was like I was not
I didn't know why I was doing it.

Speaker 2 (19:48):
Anymore.

Speaker 4 (19:49):
I was like, am I just doing it because like
I've just been doing this for so long, Like, No,
I'm doing it because I love storytelling, I love like
the art of it, I love the production of it.
I want to direct one day. I will direct one day.
And yeah, it feels good to kind of to be
able to do that. So if you're listening to this
and you have like a career or something that maybe

(20:11):
you've put on the back burner that's like still keeps
you up at night that you still think about or
you steel like, damn, what if I what if I
could have fucking go explore that shit, like for real,
like go explore. It doesn't have to be like balls
to the wall, quit your job, you're gonna go, but
like just go revisit it and see if it feels different,
because nine times out of ten, like you've evolved and

(20:32):
like you're going to show up in that space different
than you did ten years ago.

Speaker 3 (20:36):
And it's it's true, Like I think that there's such
a there's such this this non spoken, like weird thing,
especially with the inner, that that there's no process and
that you have to be perfect and then you have
to just like know everything and be an expert and
when you show up, it has to be exceptionally perfect,

(20:57):
and it's like it's ridiculous. It's a ridiculous concept. And
even like you know, I can relate, it's on a
very like minor level. But you know, like I finished
school two years ago and like in sexology and this
TANTRUC practitioner and I've taken clients privately and like one
on one, but I haven't felt like I've like fully
stepped into it, and like I don't know what I've
been like afraid of. And like I was thinking the

(21:18):
other day and I was like just thinking about all
the all the things that have led me to where
I'm at, just in general, like hospitality and now I
do retreats and like just a people person I've always
been and like that I've always wanted to write and
I wrote a book. And I was thinking, like in
high school I took just because I took it. I
took a sexual behavior class at Valley College in eleventh grade.

(21:40):
Why who the fuck knows, like a two and a
half hour class like once a week. But I was like,
because I've always loved this shit, I've always loved human sex, sexuality.
I've always been intrigued by like psychology and like you know,
storytelling and all these things. And it's like we grow
get older and we think that there has to be
this like huge title or this huge big break, or
there has to be this thing that like makes you

(22:03):
acceptable by the masses as the as the master of
But it's like, what about the fact that like just intuitively,
these are things that you fuck with and enjoy and
like and that's generally how you get like the big
break when you're just doing the art for the fuck
of it. Like Eric and I are sitting here because
not because we were like we're gonna be the best
motherfucking podcast podcasters in the business.

Speaker 2 (22:24):
We were just like, yeah, this is fun. This is fun. Oh,
this is this is new.

Speaker 3 (22:29):
Oh I could take pictures, so this is fun, you know,
and like the curiosity and like the the the energy
of something new, and like the collaboration obviously and the friendship.

Speaker 2 (22:40):
But just like I was doing, like asked the sexologists.

Speaker 3 (22:43):
On my stories and people are like, oh, thank you
so much for asking me questions and just participating. And
I'm not really someone who likes to talk to camera,
but I was like, oh, maybe this is it, because
then I have I have a.

Speaker 1 (22:53):
I have a.

Speaker 3 (22:55):
Like a huh a prompt. I have thinks I have
a prompt and it makes it easier to talk, you know,
and just talk about it. And I was just like,
it's something very small, but it made me feel good
and so I understand and like and.

Speaker 2 (23:07):
I was just like wondering, like what has stopped me?

Speaker 3 (23:09):
I got the piece of fucking paper, It's printed out,
it's framed.

Speaker 2 (23:13):
Like I didn't never need the piece of paper.

Speaker 3 (23:14):
I mean, obviously to know certain things whatever, But this
idea in this mainstream society that we need a piece of.

Speaker 2 (23:21):
Paper, or we need the big break, or we need
to be on six.

Speaker 3 (23:24):
Seasons of sex and the city to be recognizable and
to like show up and like in all of our essence,
Like you've been an actress, you know what I mean.
And it's just like I do resonate with that, especially
as a mom, because a lot of our our focus
goes to others, to our kids, to our marriages, to
our need to make money, and not so much just
to the art of existing in the presence and the

(23:46):
art of creating and like supporting yourself in the community.
So I'm fairly happy for you that you that you
jumped back in and that you just did it and
that it felt really good and like that you're committing
to do that again and like, yeah, I'm I'm excited
for just the blossoming and the growth and like what

(24:08):
that does. I think like when you water other parts
of your artistry, like it it automatically waters other parts
of your life because you're watering yourself and you're going
to be creative in more than one way because you're
being creative in one space.

Speaker 4 (24:20):
You know, Yeah, thank you, And it does feel good.
And I'm I'm going to share more of the process,
so make sure you you know, you just keep affirming
a bitch over here, you know, little more affirmations on
the journey. And also being an actor is and and
a creator in general is it can be a very

(24:42):
lonely and also like it's hard to not judge yourself,
you know, because you're always kind of it's being evaluated
and being evaluated in some way. And so I want
to encourage everyone listening to like, if you need people
in your life to hype you up, like let us
hype you up. Join our discord there's a whole community
of people there that I'm utilizing. Well, I'm utilizing on

(25:03):
this next journey of you know, starting something new in
this way.

Speaker 2 (25:07):
I think people have a hard time saying I need
to be hyped up. Yeah, hey, can you support me?
I'm feeling scared. That is not something that we've been like,
uh like uh massage.

Speaker 4 (25:16):
No. No, We're not supposed to do that. We're supposed
to be modest. We're supposed to be humble.

Speaker 2 (25:20):
We're supposed to just like move in silence.

Speaker 4 (25:22):
Yeah, like and not talk about the thing until it's
arrived because it's bad luck or it's untasteful or whatever.

Speaker 2 (25:28):
The people are gonna not think I'm good.

Speaker 4 (25:29):
At it all that you're about to hear this journey
and when I fucking make it on the big screen, bitch,
I'm having a fucking viewing. Fucking screening. Okay, we're celebrating.

Speaker 2 (25:40):
I'm in a view of I'm viewing of all your
of all your stories up till that point.

Speaker 4 (25:43):
Maybe that too.

Speaker 5 (25:44):
Okay, cut the real GB, Cut the real GB.

Speaker 2 (25:48):
We need.

Speaker 4 (25:49):
It was gonna be an hour.

Speaker 2 (25:49):
You remember when I started in the bathroom, I told
you bitches you were gonna see. Oh you don't let
me play it for you because I haven't hear mydica.
Now I'm accepting my Emmy always knew it.

Speaker 4 (26:02):
Yeah, So anyway, I speaking of getting a job.

Speaker 2 (26:07):
Oh, I was just gonna say, speaking of sticking to
your passions and your passion projects and the things that
you love and your hobbies and your arts.

Speaker 4 (26:16):
Yeah. Did you see Tabitha's recent reel that everyone is
up in arms about pissed? Well, you showed it to Okay,
I showed it to you. What are your thoughts? Basically? Actually,
let's play the clip here.

Speaker 6 (26:30):
Hello, dear, real quick that this is not to discourage you,
because I want us to be clear about it first. Okay,
you kind of been in this place for a long time. Okay,
now listen, you got good ideas, baby, you got good ideas.

Speaker 1 (26:52):
Your execution is not as good.

Speaker 4 (26:55):
Okay, You're followed through not as good.

Speaker 6 (27:01):
The ideas, though, are great.

Speaker 1 (27:04):
Entrepreneurship.

Speaker 4 (27:05):
It it's not for everybody, and that doesn't mean.

Speaker 1 (27:07):
It's not for you.

Speaker 6 (27:08):
But but right now, these last few months, few years,
you know what I'm talking about. Maybe it ain't it
ain't been working for you, Okay, And and you're doing
a lot of robbing Peter to pay Paul. Okay, you
you done got yourself in some mess, and it's time
for you to get a a job. Can you hear me?

(27:32):
You You just gonna need to get a job for
a little while, okay. D It don't mean your ideas
ain't good. Okay, don't mean that maybe one day you
could be a good entrepreneur. But you have proven to
yourself and everybody else that you owe money to. Okay,
that it ain't working right now. Okay, it ain't. It

(27:53):
ain't work for a while. It actually has never worked yet.
Doesn't mean it won't ever work. But right now you
need to go to work, and you're gonna need to
get a job, okay, and then keep working towards it,
but at least you will have a job while you
are pursuing that thing. But right now you need to

(28:17):
get a job, baby, all right, that's it.

Speaker 1 (28:20):
I love you. They're going to watch your business. Okay.

Speaker 4 (28:23):
Have to have a good night tomorrow, have a good day.

Speaker 1 (28:26):
But even if you can't have a.

Speaker 6 (28:27):
Good one, don't today'll go messing up.

Speaker 4 (28:29):
Nobody else is here.

Speaker 6 (28:31):
Don't be mad at me.

Speaker 4 (28:32):
Okay, So the bitches are mad.

Speaker 3 (28:40):
I feel I'm gonna say, how oft this is right?
I mean, the two things can exist at one time,
too right.

Speaker 4 (28:50):
I think it's the messenger that people get mad about.

Speaker 2 (28:52):
You know, she's made it and she's rich. Well, it
doesn't mean the.

Speaker 4 (28:55):
Message is wrong at all. It's just like people take
issue with the messenger and often can't hear the message
because of the messenger. I think that I don't think
that she's not the right messenger. I'm just saying I
think that that's where the issue lies for a lot
of people that are up in arms about her saying this.

Speaker 3 (29:12):
I think that a hit dog will holler and if
some that And I'm not saying stop and abandon your dreams,
but I'm saying people, I know I've said that we've
been delusional and it's worked for us in our life.
But I think people are delusional in the sense that

(29:36):
people will suck, like will jeopardize their livelihood for a dream,
and sometimes it works, and sometimes you end up homeless.

Speaker 2 (29:48):
And you can't a part of the story. And that's
part of your story, and that could be part of
your story. If you're a lone, single wolf alone in
the world, and you don't have any cubs to care
for sure. If that's your story, you've you fucking couchsurfed
for years and then you made it. Congratulations. I don't
believe in.

Speaker 3 (30:09):
CouchSurfing for years over a certain age, I don't believe.
I'm not saying like I think that some people sometimes
pursue their side hustles to a point where it's it
sacrifices there I don't know, stability, their mental stability. It
actually sacrifices the dream. Most dreams require some sort of investment.

(30:34):
So you know, like if you're a rapper and you
want to be a rapper, you gotta have money for
the studio. You gotta have money for the for the video.
You gotta know if you want the video to look good,
you gotta have a.

Speaker 2 (30:46):
Fucking main hustle to supplement and support the side hustle.
So I just think, like I think it actually is
is more.

Speaker 3 (30:54):
It gives more to the side hustle or to the
passion project if you have the means to not be
worrying about food and shelter and how you're going to
feed this main hustle. And I don't think a lot
of people want to hear that, because.

Speaker 2 (31:07):
Even on the retreats, I feel like people get the
holy ghost of spirit and they abandon they jump ship.
I've seen women be like, I'm in year four medical school.
I'm quitting. Fuck it happened to her, by the way,
I need to figure out where did she open up
that dance school and she quit medical school? And I'm
pretty sure it worked. I don't know.

Speaker 3 (31:25):
I believed her, but and sometimes it works, and only
you know how how how how deep the fire is burning.
But I do believe in Like, it's really hard to
focus on a passion project if you are fucking about
to be evicted and starving.

Speaker 2 (31:40):
Yeah, I mean I think I think that also, and
I know because I've been there.

Speaker 4 (31:44):
I think that also, like sometimes you have to quit
the job, go through entrepreneurship or whatever, do the passion
project fail, maybe even go homeless to then realize, like
the lesson of okay, let me recalibrate, I maybe need
to do both. I can do both, or like or
figuring out what that looks like. I think that's something.

(32:06):
I think that also, as I'm sitting here thinking about
why women are so mad about this, because there's a
lot of facts is also it's just a sensitive time
because facts, because there's the fact of the matter is faxes.

Speaker 2 (32:17):
There's a lot of faxes.

Speaker 4 (32:18):
I had to say that there's a lot of faxes
because there's a lot of people that have lost their job,
Like it's not so easy to just go get a
nine to five, especially in this climate where three hundred
and fifty thousand black women are out of work.

Speaker 2 (32:34):
Exactly, That's what I'm saying.

Speaker 3 (32:36):
I'm saying, if you're just setting like if you're sending
in your resignation letter from a good job right now,
rethink that.

Speaker 7 (32:42):
Well.

Speaker 4 (32:42):
I think that she was more speaking to the people
that are have been living off of their dream and
the dream is no longer working and instead of realizing
and jesting and shifting to the time that hey, maybe
I need to go back to that job, they are
scheming and scamming and borrowing money, not paying people back
and putting their families in jeopardy and putting themselves in jeopardy.

(33:05):
And I think those things can be true, But I
also know that the climate of finding work is also
it's easier said than done.

Speaker 3 (33:11):
Hell yeah, this worker is not easy to come by
right now. People have been looking for jobs for over
a year, Like it's not we're not in a place.

Speaker 2 (33:21):
AI is taking over, you.

Speaker 4 (33:22):
Guys, And that's what I'm saying, Like even the jobs
that maybe you might go back to to go get
your nine to five have changed, like that position no
longer exists anymore because AI has taken over. So her
comment is mirroring people's fears. And also, like I said,
the messenger of her Tabitha, who is super successful, is

(33:44):
on home shopping Network on the post right before selling
her products, you know, living in the life of her.

Speaker 2 (33:49):
But that was not always that. She didn't start there
she was driving uber of course not.

Speaker 4 (33:54):
But I'm just saying, these are the These are the
triggers that people have for the messenger that's being said.
It's kind of like person when Kim Kardashian was like, bitch,
you need to work harder.

Speaker 2 (34:03):
That's a two different. That's two different. That's totally different.

Speaker 3 (34:06):
Though we've seen she's talked really transparent and I don't
even I'm not even a huge tab at the fan,
Like I don't know.

Speaker 4 (34:11):
She's shared. She has shared her journey, which is also
part of like what we were talking about before, Like
we have seen her audience has watched her struggle and
her growth all the way.

Speaker 2 (34:20):
Why why it's probably even more triggering.

Speaker 3 (34:23):
I mean, I feel like it's it's triggering, but it's
also like I saw you go get it, Like I
can't really be mad at that messenger because you've actually
probably experienced hardship. It'd be Kim Kay, you were sucking
Very Jay's dick, and your mom made that shit work,
and here you are now you have a fucking BOLLI.

Speaker 4 (34:40):
Her baseline was privileged, like her daughter. Her dad was
a lawyer, like you know.

Speaker 2 (34:45):
She Paris Hilton's assistant.

Speaker 3 (34:47):
You know, so it's not relatable, Like I don't want
to hear that shit, like I think I was watching.

Speaker 2 (34:52):
I was thinking I was.

Speaker 3 (34:52):
I was listening to a podcast about the founder of
Glossier and she's like, oh, I got an internship at
Vogue because my neighbor got it for me.

Speaker 2 (35:01):
And then I asked, can I do my own column?
And like, turn your shit off. I don't hear his
fucking white bitch talk about how she had an internship
at Velu and then it spawned into Glassier. Like to me,
it's not relatable. I don't want to hear that shit, like,
it doesn't sound like you've strapped up your boots. Bitch,
you were already in a privileged position and then you

(35:22):
got more privilege. Oh, magic manifestation and not this thing.
She hasn't worked really hard.

Speaker 3 (35:28):
But I'm saying most people don't even get to the
internship at fucking Vogue because you don't live two doors
down from the they get vote right, because your daddy
doesn't know his homeboy or whatever the fuck. And so
it's like we're starting at two different starting points. But
I think that there has to be yes delusion, but
there has to be reality. You have to And this
is coming from a bitch who daily tries to escape

(35:49):
the three D world, as in right now, I'm trying
to avoid all things.

Speaker 2 (35:53):
But the reality is the reality.

Speaker 3 (35:56):
Bills have to get paid, your stomach needs to be fed,
like your kidney to be fed. Things have to still
on a day to d basis be taken care of.

Speaker 2 (36:03):
And it's not fun.

Speaker 3 (36:05):
I've been there, and it's not fun to be worrying
about that shit. So get your ducks in a row
and then pursue and pour into the other shit and like,
do both. And I know it's hard and it's easier
said than done. But like abandoning ship on all your
fucking responsibility.

Speaker 2 (36:21):
Ain't it so? Tabitha? You go ahead, You keep telling
these bitches okay, because it's true.

Speaker 4 (36:30):
In breaking heart news, Baddy Winkle has passed.

Speaker 2 (36:38):
Let's take this moment of silence for Baddie.

Speaker 4 (36:40):
I feel like we did to smoke a joint for Batty.
Do we have weed for Baddy Winkle?

Speaker 2 (36:43):
What's in that thing? It says two grams of something.

Speaker 4 (36:46):
This is like we gotta smoke in bad Yeah, yeah,
this is for Baddie.

Speaker 2 (36:51):
Is a big fat If you're home right now, and
if you don't know who Baddy Winkle is, open up
your Instagram. She's the baddest bitch of the elderlies. She's been.
She is a geriatric barad bitch.

Speaker 4 (37:03):
And she's a geriatric bad bitch, and she's.

Speaker 2 (37:06):
Been a jeriacic bad bitch for some years. She was
born in nineteen twenty nine, twenty eight, So how old
is that? Somebody do the math? I mean in nineteen
twenty eight. Oh my gosh, she's a cancer. It makes
so much sense.

Speaker 4 (37:19):
How old is she?

Speaker 2 (37:22):
Ninety eight?

Speaker 4 (37:24):
Wow? You know?

Speaker 2 (37:25):
I because she was being a bad bitch.

Speaker 3 (37:26):
She lived that long, and with technology and weed, I'm
going to live at least to one hundred and eleven.

Speaker 4 (37:31):
Okay, well, let's take a moment to bless this joint
for Baddie Winkle and all the elderly bad bitches, but
specifically Baddie Winkle, who.

Speaker 3 (37:39):
Like really set the precedent for geriatric bad bitches and
for us to just always be bad bitches no matter
how old you are.

Speaker 4 (37:46):
Yes, may we always remember how bad, how good, how sexy,
how you can dress like a little hoochie at any age,
and you could smoke weed at any age, and you
could still party with the young'ins at any age, and.

Speaker 2 (38:00):
You could maybe even become a seventy eight year old influencer.

Speaker 4 (38:02):
Yeah, you could be a.

Speaker 3 (38:03):
Late late late in life TikTok star on the rise,
and Batty Winkle showed us all that there's no side
project that doesn't matter.

Speaker 2 (38:12):
I don't know who her great great granddaughter was, but
they really put her on.

Speaker 4 (38:15):
They put her the fuck on. So bless their family,
Bless Batty Winkle. We love you.

Speaker 3 (38:21):
Rest in power, Rest and power. Batty like that shit up,
but for real, I do want to be. I do
want to live into my elderly bad bitch years. I
want to be a geriatric bad bitch. You are, and
so it is, and so it is right.

Speaker 2 (38:40):
I want to really be at least one hundred and eleven.

Speaker 4 (38:43):
So the old the one thing that you have to do,
or that we have to do, if we're going to
be geriatric bad bitches, we got to take care of
our bodies so that we're not in pain, so that
we can still like throw we can. We don't throw
a hip out trying to be a bad periatric bitch.

Speaker 2 (38:55):
I have literally almost thrown a hip out just fucking
for like extended amount of time, more stretching. I know
it's crazy.

Speaker 3 (39:03):
So now I haven't been in the gym lately, and
I feel really good about it. I'm not gonna lie.
I feel stronger, and my butt I feel like it's
getting bigger.

Speaker 2 (39:14):
Good. I'm gonna show you when this is over so
you can affirm that my butt is getting bigger.

Speaker 4 (39:20):
Why don't you show us right now?

Speaker 2 (39:23):
Okay, I was gonna take my pants down.

Speaker 3 (39:25):
Okay, Oh you can pull the panther on okay, oh
oh oh oh, what color is my thonge let's see purple,
like purple lavender.

Speaker 4 (39:40):
Okay, let's see the butt turn the butt.

Speaker 5 (39:43):
Oh oh.

Speaker 2 (39:49):
A little big, Yeah, I see it.

Speaker 4 (39:51):
I see it. Wow, look at that wagon. It's gorgeous.

Speaker 2 (39:58):
I see it if you guys, don't you? But I
don't know what the fuck you're doing and surging my
eight week my two week workout plan. My butt is huge, huge,
looks great.

Speaker 4 (40:10):
I think you're on your way to being a geriatric,
bad bitch.

Speaker 2 (40:13):
Not too soon, okay, I'm just saying like you're on
the path.

Speaker 3 (40:16):
Okay, first fifty years. Fifty years is what age is like?
The geriatric come in.

Speaker 4 (40:23):
Oh right now, they're calling us geriatric pregnancies. We're already geriatric.
I rebuke that in the name according to medical.

Speaker 3 (40:32):
No, but I really have thought, like Tama, if I
want to keep going hard in the paint like this,
I have to go hard in the like the workout.
So I know soning and I'm going to take vitamins
and seamas. And I always say this like every other
week because the government's trying to kill us. But I'm
really tapping in now. Yeah, so I won't be a

(40:53):
geriatric dead bitch.

Speaker 4 (40:54):
Yeah. No, I've I've been taking my tinctures every morning.
If you follow me on Instagram at watch Erica, come
take your vitamins with me in the morning, because it's
the only reason or way that I can remember to
do it is if the Internet holds me accountable. And
I think that I was having this conversation with my
friend yesterday because my high school reunion is coming up
and I'm missing it. I'm not even gonna go. Why

(41:15):
because I'm gonna be in New York.

Speaker 2 (41:17):
You're really looking forward to it. You really had big plans,
I know, but I like money show those bitches spas.

Speaker 4 (41:24):
I told them to FaceTime me when they get there.
It's not the FaceTime FaceTime me at the reunion. But
I was talking to my friend who went to high
school with because she just went to Vegas. We used
to go to Vegas every birthday, like from like age
sixteen to maybe like twenty five or something. I went
to Vegas with her for her birthday and it was

(41:45):
always like debaucherous and then like you know, life happened,
babies happen, marriage happened. Anyway, she was like, I want
to go again. So she went this year and I
told her I was like, we had just got back
from the retreat, like, girl.

Speaker 2 (42:00):
I remember, so did she have a great time?

Speaker 4 (42:02):
She was like, it's not. She's like it's not the same.
What I did learn though, was that the day parties
are still the best thing. Really, Yes, the night is
where the night's not where it's at. It's the day party,
pool party. And I was like I always knew that,
like even then. But she also said that it's just
like it's just like as she's gotten older, she realized,

(42:22):
like the spontaneity, it's harder for her to be as
spontaneous because like she has, she doesn't the plan.

Speaker 2 (42:28):
Like if if I take shots in the day, I can't.
We're not going on.

Speaker 4 (42:31):
It's not even that, it's like where are we going tonight?
Like I don't want to meet a guide the casino
who's going to guide us to the club and we're
gonna figure it out from there?

Speaker 2 (42:39):
Like no, right, we're gonna stand in line?

Speaker 4 (42:42):
Hell no, Like no, I want to know where we're going.

Speaker 2 (42:44):
Do we have a table?

Speaker 3 (42:45):
Who's the you know, you kind of have to be
fluzy enough to meet the guy with the table at
the casino.

Speaker 4 (42:50):
But she said the one big takeaway was that she
needed to dress up more. That like she's been knee
deep in motherhood for like the past. She has two
kids and they're like both under like six or something.
And she's like, I've just haven't been myself. I haven't
been dressing up. I haven't been putting the dress on,
putting makeup on. Like it's just that's my lesson. And
she's like, and I realized that I need to work out,
and that like this body is not the body, not

(43:13):
like you want to have the same body, but that
this is a time in our life that kind of
like can make or break how we look in the future.

Speaker 3 (43:21):
I read that at thirty six, like this in your
body starts keeping the score for real.

Speaker 4 (43:25):
Right, So, like those usual tricks that you used to do,
starving yourself for a week and then you have an
ab that shit doesn't exist anymore. There's no muscle underneath
their babe, there's no muscle that's lifting that ass up anymore.
So you like, stopping to drinking soda for one week
isn't going to make you have a fat ass anymore.
You actually have to do weightlifting.

Speaker 2 (43:45):
It's so crazy you said that. I was literally like
put like doing leg presses in the gym, and I
was like, you know, I looked like this for a
long time. And I was like I danced in senior year,
Like how long does memory memory muscle? Like what does
a mess muscle memory work? I was like, this is
probably my last.

Speaker 3 (44:04):
Year, Like I really have to keep going because my
twelfth grade muscle memory is not going to serve me
at age thirty seven.

Speaker 2 (44:11):
Oh my god.

Speaker 3 (44:12):
So yeah, I was thinking that about like my abs
and like the little bit of muscle like definition I
have in my legs. I was literally like the last
time I like consistently worked out was all throughout high
school as like a dancer, and I had like a
fucking Nazi ass dance teacher.

Speaker 2 (44:31):
But yeah, I was like, I have to develop this discipline.

Speaker 3 (44:35):
Or else I'm gonna lose it and I'm gonna be
like a skinny, flabby girl and I don't want that.

Speaker 4 (44:41):
Yeah, So this is a crucial time. This is a
crucial time if you're listening Buckle.

Speaker 2 (44:47):
Up, Sugar Cup, Buckle up, Sugar Cup.

Speaker 4 (44:50):
Due chapter bitches, if you are around the age of
thirty five to forty, get it together.

Speaker 2 (44:56):
Now the time we are getting together.

Speaker 4 (44:58):
This is the year.

Speaker 5 (44:59):
This is it.

Speaker 4 (44:59):
We're already at the end of the year, so this
is We're going to start early with our year's resolutions.
We're starting now in September.

Speaker 2 (45:06):
So by January it'll be like I'm already in it.

Speaker 4 (45:08):
I'm already in it. Like you don't have to get ready,
You're already a stressed out You're in it. We're like, actually, yes,
let's talk about these resolutions now. Think about your resolutions now.

Speaker 2 (45:16):
It's pre resolution time, pre resolution.

Speaker 4 (45:18):
Yes, I think that actually that needs to be a
serious thing.

Speaker 3 (45:21):
Pre resolution, because then you won't put so much pressure
on yourself New Year's and then you'll be like already, like.

Speaker 2 (45:27):
This is it. This is the time.

Speaker 4 (45:28):
You're already embodying the thing that you are calling.

Speaker 1 (45:31):
In So.

Speaker 3 (45:32):
And also, my vanity just won't allow me to look
my age like I have to always I don't care
where I'm at in the world, how I am.

Speaker 2 (45:42):
The young bitch is always like, oh my god, really
you're all right, You're like, yeah, I united, bitch.

Speaker 4 (45:53):
This guy asked for my ID the other day and
I was like, thank you for that, and I was like, God,
I've reached the apra I'm thinking.

Speaker 2 (46:01):
We got it.

Speaker 4 (46:03):
I remember being around I remember being around other women
that would.

Speaker 3 (46:06):
Do that, like my mom, like thank you. We gotta
stop doing that. That's gonna age es too. Just more
things we gotta stop doing. Happy happy birthday. No acting
shocks when people are like, oh my god, you're like
I almost look at them like, well, your your your.

Speaker 4 (46:20):
Use your trans age anyway. So it's fine.

Speaker 3 (46:22):
But if someone said, my I d I'm gonna have
to get if. If I'm going to get an age
change with today's technology and a certain amount of money,
I'm gonna get it.

Speaker 2 (46:39):
On my breath, i can't breathe. Yeah, you're here.

Speaker 3 (46:43):
Here first guys, Oh my god, Jamel and Matt and
I'm getting an age change.

Speaker 2 (46:47):
Oh wow.

Speaker 3 (46:50):
Okay, I'm not gonna tell anybody except you everybody on
the internet who heard.

Speaker 2 (46:55):
But after that, no way speak of it.

Speaker 4 (46:57):
We'll delete this episode. Delete it, like Bobby, Wait, did
you see Bobby and Drake's new entry into podcasting. Apparently
he deleted the episode that they did.

Speaker 2 (47:06):
How does he have the power with her?

Speaker 4 (47:07):
I don't know they deleted it, but anyway, I'm getting
off topic, but it made me think of we could
just delete, just delete it.

Speaker 2 (47:13):
Oh, just like our wholeness. Remember Drea said delete, we
delete that episode.

Speaker 4 (47:16):
It didn't exist.

Speaker 2 (47:16):
We never said it. My people were back. No, it
was deleted.

Speaker 3 (47:20):
When people started saying something I don't remember or that
I don't I'm not going to recall them, and to
say control A delete, control out delete, control delete, it
was like start malfunctioning.

Speaker 2 (47:33):
Control delete.

Speaker 4 (47:33):
Oh no, that was deleted off my record.

Speaker 2 (47:35):
Control out delete, that was deleted. Asked me something right now?

Speaker 4 (47:39):
I asked you, if I was born in the year
I was born, were you born in nineteen eighty eight?

Speaker 2 (47:44):
Control out delete?

Speaker 4 (47:46):
Okay, I'm trying to think like what I would think
if you said that. I guess it's like confusing enough
for me to be like, let's move on. We're moving on.
Let's subject Is she robot?

Speaker 2 (47:59):
Is she human? I don't know? Control al delete?

Speaker 5 (48:00):
Wow?

Speaker 4 (48:02):
Yeah, control all delete? Is that the name of this episode?

Speaker 3 (48:04):
Maybe yesterday when I did ask a sexologist on my stories,
somebody said, like, do we do are we counting people
that we had sex with? Like if it's just intercourse
or like what about like deep intimate like connections?

Speaker 2 (48:22):
And I said, you're counting whoever you want. It's up
to you.

Speaker 3 (48:26):
If you don't want those niggas to count, control delete honestly,
like if you were a condom, that's already control a delete.
But just in general, if you want to delete, let
me tell you from someone meet. I delete shit from
my mind. I tell these two motherfuckers right here never
speak of it again. And if you talk to me
like it exists, IM gonna look at you crazy as hell.

Speaker 2 (48:46):
And you've seen me do it. You've seen me do it.
I will control all delete some shit, and you.

Speaker 3 (48:50):
Can't do niggas, bitches, whole years of your life control
out delete I I nobody can tell you what happened.
Your body can know the fuck it can control. Delete
it from my memory. Don't remember shit, but you're living
a memory all by yourself. Don't know what you're talking about.

(49:11):
Don't resonate, don't identify.

Speaker 4 (49:13):
I don't don't. I don't know her who her?

Speaker 2 (49:17):
Who? That wasn't me.

Speaker 4 (49:18):
That's another Jamila, literally another treat.

Speaker 2 (49:22):
Treat your past selves like bitches. You don't know because
I'm a different bitch now.

Speaker 3 (49:26):
I mean, I think that we should give ourselves the
grace to do that, because sometimes you have to create
new neuropaths in your brain in order to even really
believe it, or else you're just lying to You're just lying.

Speaker 2 (49:36):
You don't believe. It is an idiomar basically controlled delete,
like remember it and then you delete it.

Speaker 4 (49:41):
You reprogram it. Yeah, so like's not deletion. It's more
of a different outcome.

Speaker 2 (49:46):
This is actually a new version of DMR. It's my
I disbirth it right now.

Speaker 3 (49:49):
It's called control delete there and if you come in
my d MS, I can lead you through it, control
all delete and we can just reprogram the whole It
could just be gone.

Speaker 4 (49:59):
We can.

Speaker 2 (50:00):
You can reprogram your whole life.

Speaker 4 (50:01):
I mean, you are a licensed hypnotherapist.

Speaker 2 (50:03):
I know I'm not.

Speaker 4 (50:04):
So she's going to control all delete.

Speaker 2 (50:06):
Anything that you want out of your life. Just call me.

Speaker 3 (50:09):
If you're digmatized right now, you need to hypnotize that
nigga out your life.

Speaker 2 (50:13):
Get undigmatized. Call me my miss cleo.

Speaker 4 (50:18):
I'm not joking that that would be very powerful, because
when it bitch is digmatized, it's like almost worse than heroin.

Speaker 7 (50:24):
It is.

Speaker 2 (50:25):
It's dick cessation.

Speaker 3 (50:27):
You need to be hypnotized to remove it from your
subconscious and then your body will respond. It's your mind
that's sucking up right now, and I can help you
with that. Look, I got a whole new nigga. I
controlled all deleted a lot of dicks out of my life.

Speaker 4 (50:39):
Once.

Speaker 2 (50:39):
It had me fucking crazy, worse than fentanyl.

Speaker 4 (50:42):
I saw it.

Speaker 2 (50:43):
I was there, I was actually crazy like a crackhead.
And now control Delete I like this, this is a commercial.

Speaker 3 (50:56):
We're obviously very high. Now I'm convinced control delete. I'm sold. Okay,
So if you if you experienced DMR, there's another, a
whole new level new ship you didn't even know about yet.

Speaker 2 (51:10):
I've been using it in my whole life. Actually, now
I'm realizing and it's worked just great.

Speaker 4 (51:15):
Yeah, yeah, perfect. Maybe I need to I need some
I definitely need some control all delete. I feel like
I've controlled all delete, but then it always comes back
to haunt me. So I haven't fully deleted it. Perhaps
you got it like a delete it. This is control
a delete somatic edition. Yeah, get it out of your body. Then,

(51:36):
so those first there's the first level one of control delete,
and that's the mind, and then we master the body and.

Speaker 3 (51:42):
Then it's gone, not even in the cloud nowhere. Oh
my god, are you gonna pull the tarot time?

Speaker 4 (51:53):
Oh? Sure?

Speaker 2 (51:55):
Unless you have any bad choices this week?

Speaker 4 (51:59):
Do I have any bad choices this week?

Speaker 5 (52:03):
Bad mom?

Speaker 2 (52:04):
Not a bad mom, but a bad mom.

Speaker 4 (52:08):
So good.

Speaker 3 (52:12):
I'm I don't think I have any bad choices. I
had some challenging moments.

Speaker 2 (52:21):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (52:23):
I had a moment where like it was just like
there was a lot going on and like Iri, it
was like with sha Keem and Iri and Irin like
threw something at Shakeem's face and he's like been in
pain and so he was like, ah, it was like
he like cowered in pain. And I was like, oh
my god. And then she was like and then she
started crying. She was like felt bad. But then like

(52:46):
it was like this whole thing that happened, and I
was just like don't. I was like, don't you start crying?
Like why the fuck are you crying?

Speaker 2 (52:52):
Like you hurt him?

Speaker 4 (52:52):
And then I was like, oh my god, because she
feels bad. But then also like now he has to
take care of her anyway. I got I was overwhelmed,
and I was just like yelled at her and then
I was like are you okay? And then she went upstairs,
and I was like, what the fuck do I do
in this situation? Like what is motherhood? What is like girlfriendhood?
What is the right thing? Yeah, and so I had

(53:14):
to go upstairs and talk to her, and it was
it was fun. It was actually an opportunity that I
felt like there was growth and understanding. But in that moment,
I was just.

Speaker 3 (53:23):
Like, this is too many people to manage. Fuck, it
makes me feel like the manager and there's so many people.

Speaker 4 (53:29):
The bad choice was like do I need a girl?
Do I need to be a girlfriend and a mom?
Like why do I do any of these things? I
could have just been Erica and where I am.

Speaker 3 (53:40):
It's been me and that's it, and not brought no
other problems in the masterhood myself, that's a mother. Instead,
I've brought other elements in here that now I have
to master and work on and do the work.

Speaker 4 (53:52):
Why got it?

Speaker 2 (53:54):
Like why God? Why do we off for these lifestyles?

Speaker 4 (53:57):
So that wasn't that's my bad choice of the week
was I guess those negative thoughts. I was like, I
don't know, I don't want to do none of this
ship yeah forever and then but then I got past
it and it was great. It was like and I
was happy that I got well, happy I got to
talk to him. I like have that opportunity with her,

(54:18):
and it was fine, and it was what we're gonna say.

Speaker 2 (54:22):
Also, you don't have to be like the manager. Sometimes
I just let some hash it up.

Speaker 3 (54:25):
Yeah yeah, yeah yeah, and sometimes like yeah, when it's
been two d she was talking ship.

Speaker 2 (54:35):
To Orlando, he like got in her ass. I was like, you, like,
you're acting crazy, Like what the fuck?

Speaker 3 (54:46):
So yeah, and you know, I also went to back
to school night high and I didn't like take into
account for it. And then she started talking about sixth
grade and then I just start crying and to school
night because I was high, and I was like, I'm prepared.
I was like, why is she talking about this? And
I was like, oh, because she's gonna graduate.

Speaker 4 (55:06):
And I was like.

Speaker 2 (55:10):
Trying to hold it together, and I'm like I should
never have gotten high before this.

Speaker 4 (55:13):
Did you actually cry? See you cry? No?

Speaker 2 (55:15):
I was like trying to hold it in. And I
was like she was talking to like a group of parents.
So I was just hoping that like one tier didn't
come streaming down my eye.

Speaker 4 (55:23):
Wow, Wow, that hasn't happened. Yet I know it's coming though.

Speaker 2 (55:26):
Fuck it was.

Speaker 3 (55:29):
I was like, I was almost offended that this bitch
brought it up without like precursor, Like I know we're
at the parent teacher fucking back to school night, but bitch, stop,
slow down.

Speaker 2 (55:37):
This is the day one. Why are we talking about
junior high? You need warm bitches. You say this is
a junior high meeting.

Speaker 4 (55:42):
Yeah that's true. You know, like send a junior high
subject to.

Speaker 3 (55:46):
My inbox, so I'm prepared to talk about junior high things.

Speaker 2 (55:49):
Yeah, because like, what, why are we talk about the
end of the year. It's motherfucking September.

Speaker 4 (55:53):
We just got out of summer. What are you talking?

Speaker 2 (55:54):
I think you're talking about homework and things. Now I'm
crying because you're a bitch. She was a bit. She
was a very nice woman, but you know what I mean.

Speaker 4 (56:02):
You know you're caught off guard.

Speaker 5 (56:03):
Fair pick a card? Bit, it's reverse though, did you

(56:27):
did you shuffle it?

Speaker 1 (56:28):
Guess?

Speaker 4 (56:31):
So I just pulled the same card we pulled last week?
Or is this first week? Oh wow, it's just a
reoccurring card I keep pulling, but it's upside down, so
it's gonna have a different meaning.

Speaker 2 (56:43):
Which is the tower, and the tower looks like shit
is shit is going down there. It looks hectic, it
looks but.

Speaker 4 (56:54):
If it's upside down, it actually looks like they're rejoicing.

Speaker 2 (56:58):
Okay.

Speaker 3 (56:59):
The tower or reverse suggests that you are undergoing a
significant personal transformation and upheaval.

Speaker 2 (57:05):
This differs from the experience.

Speaker 3 (57:07):
Of the tower upright, where the change is often because
of external circumstances and may even feel forced upon you. Instead,
with the tower reverse, you're instigating the change and calling
into question your fundamental belief systems, values, purpose, and meaning.
You may go through a spiritual awakening as you discover
a new spiritual path. You may change your beliefs and

(57:27):
opinions about important topics, realizing that you can no longer
support older models, or, in more dramatic cases, you may
go through an existential crisis where you seriously question your
life's purpose. While this can be an unsettling time, trust
in the process and know it is for the best.
You're creating change and transformation so you can step into
a new and evolved version of yourself. It also can

(57:50):
be a sign that you are resisting change in delaying
the necessary destruction and upheaval. You may be in denial
that change is occurring, or you may be clinging to
an old belief system even though you know that they
are no longer relevant or healthy for you. As much
as you don't want to, you need to go through
this difficult time to learn a valuable lesson and make

(58:12):
progress in your life. And know that you continue to
resist this and know if you continue to resist this change,
it will only force its way into your life even more.
The growth and transformation that the Tower brings is inevitable.

Speaker 2 (58:27):
Beautiful, beautiful.

Speaker 4 (58:28):
Yeah, okay, God, I hear you Tower twice. I let
me be more clear. Let me make it clear.

Speaker 3 (58:38):
I know we rarely read them upside down too, but
that was actually very clear. Yeah, change is a coming.
That was my download I got doing our psilocybin in
Costa Rica too, which shit is changing every second, every breath,
every moment. Everybody's growing, So do what you want with that.

(58:59):
Thank you guys for listening. Hi, I'm high to rest
in peace, Battywinkle rest and peace baby. Subscribe and like
this episode and comment and communicate with us, because we
are communicating all the time and we don't know what
the fuck you're thinking. So it'd be nice to know
what's going on over there and go see us on YouTube.

(59:21):
I showed my butt this episode very important information. Follow
us on socials at Good Mom Underscore, Bad Good Mom's Underscore,
Bad Choices, the Good Vibe Retreat ww dot Good Momsbadchoices
dot com. You can find me at Mila Underscore map.
If you have any asked us sexologist questions, I'll be asked.

(59:42):
I'll be answering questions on hump Day.

Speaker 2 (59:44):
Oh I like that.

Speaker 4 (59:45):
It makes sense. And you can follow me at watch
Erica and make sure you follow our discord so we
can hype you up. Make sure you go to patreon
dot com slash Good Mom's Bad Choices.

Speaker 2 (59:57):
Is that what it is?

Speaker 4 (59:58):
Yeah, Petreon dot com slash Mom's Bad Choices and join
our discord community. We have an amazing community of women
and men over there, and these different channels that women
are and men are connecting in and one of them
we hype you up. So let's type each other up
and be brave and you will.

Speaker 1 (01:00:19):
Love you.

Speaker 7 (01:00:22):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (01:00:23):
I'm living so good.

Speaker 2 (01:00:24):
Can't you tell?

Speaker 7 (01:00:25):
I went through a drought that's until I found a
well madem have been known earth. I used to be
broken tail now got the Blues DC like Beyonce Jisell
throat shots with popping his cow. We're in our voices.
Patriarchy kept it in the box to exploits. Women put
the PI and powers, so what's pointless?

Speaker 2 (01:00:41):
They want me to be good, So I made bad choices.

Speaker 7 (01:00:44):
Bad mom, not a bad mom, but a bad mom.

Speaker 2 (01:00:46):
Gitter's in on. Put cannabis in their bath.

Speaker 7 (01:00:49):
Bomb walked in bosses cap and I blew his cat.

Speaker 6 (01:00:51):
Boss tied dog.

Speaker 4 (01:00:52):
Now I'm immune to.

Speaker 7 (01:00:53):
The cat called Herbie and no waisted straight to it
like a dollar sign.

Speaker 1 (01:00:57):
Mother Wen the number went to it.

Speaker 7 (01:00:58):
It's like a water sum where you in the winter
resential will when the summertime. I do what all ain't
no one that needs to run it by