How Do You Choose? Feat. Erin Claire Jones

Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Once upon a time there was a good old traditional housewife.

Speaker 2 (00:03):
She couldn't She cleaned and cared for her children and
the man of the house, and of course she.

Speaker 3 (00:08):
Didn't talk back.

Speaker 4 (00:09):
She was both obedient and soft by nature.

Speaker 5 (00:12):
She was a good woman who always made good choices.

Speaker 4 (00:17):
We're Good Mom's Bad Choices.

Speaker 6 (00:18):
Who single mom who said fuck the patriarchy, shared all
their bad choices and.

Speaker 4 (00:22):
Sound out they were so bad.

Speaker 6 (00:23):
After all, we're experts, Overshares and your new besties.

Speaker 4 (00:26):
Sit back and enjoy the ride.

Speaker 6 (00:28):
I can.

Speaker 2 (00:32):
Hello, guys, welcome back to Good Mom's Bad Choices. I'm
Erica and I'm Nila, and this is the Tribe Chat.
This is our bonus Monday episodes. I'm so happy that
you've joined us. We actually have a really special guest,
a former guest of the show. You might have heard
our episode with Aaron Claire Jones, a human design expert,

(00:53):
but we're bringing her back because she has a new
book out. It's called How Do You Choose? A Human
Designs Guide.

Speaker 4 (00:59):
To What's best? Are you at work and love and life?
Welcome back to the show.

Speaker 3 (01:04):
Erin, Thank you so much. I'm so happy to be here.

Speaker 2 (01:07):
Yeah, it's been a while, A lot of change since
the last time we spoke.

Speaker 3 (01:11):
A lot of babies.

Speaker 4 (01:13):
You got babies and with an s.

Speaker 5 (01:16):
I know, I just I can't believe that. I really
looked at the date this morning. I was like, did
I have babies when I talked to them, and I
was like, no, babies, And now I have two little girls.

Speaker 6 (01:24):
It's so crazy how and then a book baby and
three babies. It's so crazy how life can change so quickly, so.

Speaker 5 (01:31):
Fast, and obviously becoming a parent is like changes so much.
So I'm like, who was the version of me that
was talking to you many years ago?

Speaker 4 (01:39):
One one that was more rested.

Speaker 3 (01:41):
Absolutely long, longer term memory.

Speaker 2 (01:44):
Yeah, we're rested, and perhaps I don't know, just like
just like adamal say.

Speaker 3 (01:50):
Independent, but like a little more free.

Speaker 2 (01:53):
A little more free, could just get up and do
it needed to be done.

Speaker 4 (01:56):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:57):
But yeah, I remember our episode we did want It
was called Deco Your Human Design. If you guys haven't
had a chance to go listen to it, it was
really good. We dived into human design and aern I'm
going to have you because there's a lot of people.
We have a lot of new listeners now that probably
have no idea what human design is, So can you
give our people, our tribe kind of an insight into

(02:17):
what exactly is human design because I feel like we
hear a lot about about it on the internet on Instagram,
but I would love to hear your definition of course.

Speaker 5 (02:28):
So, human design is a system based on your time,
date and place of birth that reveals how you are
wired to operate in every part of your life, from
you know, mothering and as a parent, to relationships to career.
It basically gives us own our own very kind of personalized,
unique roadmap that finding our flow. And I think what
I love about human design is that it is very mystical,

(02:49):
it is based on our birth information, but I also
feel like it's equally practical because it gives us so
many practical tools to find more flow in our day
to day, to article our relationship needs, in our relationationships,
to really kind of find the career that feels right
for us to make better decisions. So it really and
I think the book specifically is really oriented towards how
can you actually apply this in a really practical way

(03:10):
in your life.

Speaker 2 (03:12):
I love that, I think can I think when we
did our human design and I think, how many?

Speaker 4 (03:18):
What are the categories?

Speaker 3 (03:19):
I know there's like projector, there are five types high level?

Speaker 5 (03:22):
Yeah, what are manifesting generator, generator, projector, reflector, and.

Speaker 4 (03:26):
Manifestor manifesting generator. That was the one I couldn't remember today.

Speaker 2 (03:32):
I think, Oh, and I don't think I know that
I'm a projector based off for our last reading and
then Miela, you were a manifestor.

Speaker 6 (03:41):
That's right, Oh, just not the generator, just the manifestor.

Speaker 3 (03:45):
Just the manifestor.

Speaker 6 (03:46):
You told me some things that episode that I literally
never forget.

Speaker 5 (03:50):
Oh my god, it really I can't wait to revisit it.
What do you what do you remember.

Speaker 7 (03:56):
That I liked?

Speaker 6 (03:56):
I like, I'm good at creating the idea and then
giving it to someone else to follow up. That I
need a separate apartment from my man. I literally told
him that, like Aaron told me, anybody need a separate apartment.
She's right, Yeah, those are the things that stuck out most.

Speaker 5 (04:17):
Those are big ones. It's so funny because one of
the stories I tell in my book is about a
manifestor who moved in with her boyfriend and they'd been
like long distance for a long time and then they
moved in together, and like she lost all that freedom
and autonomy she'd been experiencing and they ended up having
separate bedrooms, and she's like, oh, this finally works. So
I love that you're actually integrating that it makes such
a difference.

Speaker 6 (04:36):
I mean, I'm not integrating it right now. We only
have one house in one bedroom, but we do have
a lady to tell him that.

Speaker 2 (04:42):
Yeah.

Speaker 6 (04:42):
Yeah, I just wanted to keep him, you know, up
to date about what's to come when my money gets long.

Speaker 3 (04:47):
Yeah. I love that.

Speaker 6 (04:51):
Do and your daughters, Do you guys remember No, Actually
I don't.

Speaker 3 (04:56):
I feel like they were this. I don't either, but
I feel like they were the same type.

Speaker 5 (04:59):
And if I'm remember correctly, I feel like they were
manifesting generators.

Speaker 4 (05:02):
I feel like you're right about that.

Speaker 6 (05:04):
I remember someone being a manifestor generator.

Speaker 3 (05:07):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (05:07):
I also remember you telling us we needed a manifestor
generator in our business because we don't know how to
complete shit.

Speaker 3 (05:14):
And how has that been going?

Speaker 2 (05:15):
You know, we know how to create a lot of things,
but the completion is where we have a little bit
of a hard time.

Speaker 4 (05:22):
Yeah, you know.

Speaker 6 (05:24):
But not really, because we've completed a lot of shit.
It just takes a little bit longer, a little bit
more effort.

Speaker 2 (05:29):
Yeah, it's not our favorite part. No, that's that's the thing,
that's the problem. It's gonna get done. It's just not
our favorite part. Our favorite part is the dreaming. And
then like and then for me as a projector, I'm
I think as a projector, I'm good at delegating, Like
I'm really good at being like, you do this, you
do that, I do this, And that's how my brain
works because for me, like I realize as I've gotten older,

(05:49):
like checking things off lists like makes me really happy
and makes me feel like, okay, like I've done.

Speaker 4 (05:55):
I actually just got in.

Speaker 2 (05:56):
Trouble for checking something off a list, and like I
was literally crying before I got on the call. Is
I have to go on a call and I've checked
things off the list, but I didn't consider anyone's feelings
because I was too busy checking shit off my list.

Speaker 6 (06:10):
Speaking a list, I have a list right here of
all the shit I need to do.

Speaker 7 (06:15):
It's called bitch, get shit done.

Speaker 3 (06:18):
Oh my gosh, I love that.

Speaker 6 (06:20):
Shout out to Courts and Rainbows who sent this to me,
because this has been lasting me and honestly, if I
don't write it down, it doesn't exist.

Speaker 3 (06:26):
Yeah, that's a fact.

Speaker 6 (06:29):
I'm curious why you were crying to get your checklist.

Speaker 2 (06:35):
It's a long story, okay, but yeah, it's just me
and my checklist became an a sorry, I just unplugged
my alarm so I could charge my computer. My list
didn't consider human emotion, Okay. My list was just I

(06:57):
need to get this done and I'll talk up to
you about it later. And I realized that I have
a tendency to do things first and then talk about
it later instead of now that I'm in a relationship,
like I'm not used to having to do that.

Speaker 4 (07:12):
So and that's why I was.

Speaker 2 (07:13):
I'm so excited to actually have this conversation with you
because I know that your book kind of dives into
just like the dynamics of how you know your human
design can support and probably also like not hinder your relationship,
because yeah, I think sometimes I think I've just been
I've operated as a single mom a single woman for

(07:34):
so long, and also like have been like deeply disappointed
by men and like their lack of consideration, and so
I think there's been like this training of my own
where I'm like, well, I'm not going to consider you,
and it's not even like now, it's not even a
negative because I actually have an amazing partner that deserves
all the consideration. But it's just like programmed. It's like
an afterthought for me. Now, it's just like it's on

(07:55):
my list. I swear I told you. I thought I
told you. I didn't tell you. Oh oh, and then
he's like, no, you didn't. You didn't tell me that,
and I'm like, oh, sorry, well.

Speaker 4 (08:07):
So yeah, that's where that's where I'm at today. I'm
a bad girlfriend today.

Speaker 3 (08:11):
No, I'm excited.

Speaker 5 (08:13):
I'm excited to revisit it because I feel like every
time we like rehear our human design, it lands differently
because you're just in a different place. You know, your
kids are different ages, you guys are different people, You've
done different things, you're now both in these partnerships. So
I'm curious and it would be interesting maybe also to
chat about your guys's designs through the lens of relationship,
because that feels new.

Speaker 6 (08:34):
Yeah, it is, it's very new. And I still have
a problem sweeping up. I told I remember the last
time I said I sweep up a lot of piles
all the time, and then I leave them there and
I'm like, why the fuck didn't I put them in
the dustband and throw them away?

Speaker 7 (08:46):
And you like blew my mind.

Speaker 6 (08:47):
And You're like you can't finish it, and I'm like,
this is why.

Speaker 3 (08:51):
Get the piles together? Totally.

Speaker 2 (08:54):
I know in your book you talk about just the
different things that you'll learn when reading, which is I'm
looking and it's the proft roles you designed to pursue
the professional dynamics that make you feel most seen, your
most potent. Communication strategies with colleagues, family, and friends.

Speaker 4 (09:08):
I think that's a big one.

Speaker 2 (09:09):
I think, like with with me, and I think our
even our audience. A lot of us have kids, a
lot of us maybe have partners, a lot of us
maybe are dating.

Speaker 6 (09:16):
All of us are maybe working, hopefully because we live
in or hopefully not. I hope no one's working. I
hope you're resting.

Speaker 2 (09:23):
But if you are, communication strategies is a thing, because
even I was. I was having a conversation with my
friend the other day and she's was like hanging out
with this guy and like.

Speaker 4 (09:34):
Needed to express herself.

Speaker 2 (09:36):
But like didn't know the right way to express herself,
and so I was trying to like coach her through it,
but then she went ahead and just did whatever she
wanted anyway, not that I'm like queen of the fucking
communication strategies over here with men. But it didn't go well,
and I was like, oh no, like you gotta like
why did you say it like that? And I think,
like a lot of us say a lot of things

(09:57):
like that, or we respond in such emotional ways, or
we respond out of triggers, or we respond out of
programming or how we feel that day or what just happened.
So I'm just curious, like based on I guess, let's
go with a projector what is like a what is
a communication style that is like for me and Mila,

(10:19):
So Mila being a manifestor me being a projector what
is like our best communication style for success?

Speaker 3 (10:28):
I love it?

Speaker 5 (10:29):
Okay, well there are a few pieces that come up,
so I think for you as a projector you know,
projectors often love to be invited in. They often have
so many perspectives and ideas of like how things can
be made better, and it's really good when somebody ask
for it. They're like, what do you see how can
things be improved? So often projectors tend to do well
with open ended questions where it's really clear that, like

(10:51):
their perspective is so valued and so needed and so Mela,
that would look like, I'm sure you do this in
many ways, just kind of asking Erica her perspective, how
she sees things, and you know where she wants to go.
Some people love specific questions, but for projectors it could
be more open ended. But I think most important, I
think at the heart of that, Erica, is that you
feel like very seen and recognized and like somebody wants

(11:13):
you to take.

Speaker 3 (11:13):
Up space in their world. How does that feel to you?

Speaker 4 (11:19):
Yeah, I would.

Speaker 2 (11:20):
Say that, you know, I definitely resonate with that. I
think too, because sometimes I can. I'm not always going
to share my opinion unless asked. Yeah, maybe with new friendships,
and maybe in friendships I feel comfortable with I'm more
inclined to share my opinion. But I do think that

(11:40):
there's a level of like the invitation in that makes
me feel valued, that makes me feel I guess valued.
Valued is like the biggest, the biggest word that comes
up for me that my opinion matters.

Speaker 5 (11:54):
Yeah, I would say I would say yes, and I would,
and also all good as always if you guys don't resonate.
I think human design, for me what matters most is
whether it's useful or not, whether it's true, and so
I always love hearing people's honest feedback.

Speaker 3 (12:05):
And I think you know one.

Speaker 5 (12:07):
Piece for projectors again, if you guys, sorry, haven't looked
up your human design, you can at human design blueprint
dot com and you'll see kind of what type you are.
I think projectors tend to just see a lot, and
so they're very tempted. Often I kind of share their
unsolicited feedback because they're like, I can see so clearly
how you can make this thing better. I can see
so clearly how you can reach your potential. But if
it's not asked for, it often just doesn't land, and

(12:27):
it can cultivate a lot of kind of bitterness or
resentment in the projector. So that recognition can really make
a difference. There's one other piece that I would share
for you, Erica, beyond your projector type, which is around
the fact that you're incredibly empathic according to your design,
and very sensitive to other people's feelings, which is an
amazing gift. But it also means that sometimes you might
get overwhelmed by people's emotions and it can kind of

(12:50):
you can be like hot and touchy. So I would
say for you, your most powerful communication comes from like
a very cool and calm place. So if you're ever
feeling like very emotionally intense, which is natural because you
are so empathic, taking like a little bit of space
to yourself before you communicate is often really helpful as well.

Speaker 2 (13:06):
I think that's I think that's just a rule of
thumb for everyone.

Speaker 6 (13:11):
It is.

Speaker 3 (13:12):
It is crazy, Yeah, go ahead, No, what for me?
I was gonna say.

Speaker 5 (13:16):
The difference for you is that you could just get
really wrapped up in other people's emotions. So you might
find you're talking to somebody and like you're like, I
don't know why I'm feeling so intense, Like I don't
even know where it came from. And so taking space
is a way for you to be like, Okay, that
wasn't even mine, let me reconnect. For me, La, it's
more around kind of her own emotional experience that can
sometimes be if you communicate me like kind of very
rash in the moment, you might find that you change

(13:38):
your mind like a minute or two later, because you're
like in the throes. So for you, taking space and
time is a way for you to kind of just
find more clarity, whereas for you, Erica, space of time
kind of helps you release the emotions that are not
your own.

Speaker 3 (13:51):
Does that make sense?

Speaker 7 (13:53):
Basically you're both some sensitive ass bitches.

Speaker 3 (13:58):
Meila, you rash, not meant to be rash, but are
you rash?

Speaker 6 (14:03):
I've been told that I think in my like my
tribe and my friend groups, people are kind of conditioned
to know me, and I feel I think I am
a little bit more empathetic, and because in my tribe,
I know people, so I know, like, if she's not
asking for this advice right now, I'm not gonna tell it.
I know she's probably maybe not gonna receive this. This
is a sensitive topic, so I may be more like,

(14:27):
like I'm more like thought out about it. But in
the past with people I don't know that well and
they're just telling me stupid things and I'm like, that's ridiculous,
And then I've lost friends that way that I mean
really weren't friends but just people in passing and I
was like, well, bitch, it was the truth. So you know,
I've been heard that, like I've heard that that I'm
too direct. I think I'm being kind sometimes, but sometimes

(14:51):
people can't handle the truth. And I think in my
as i've gotten older, I've been a little bit more
aware of that too, like trying to be less cut through.

Speaker 5 (15:01):
Well, I'd also say, as a manifestor for you, like,
your communication is meant to be provocative, like one of
your gifts is kind of like initiating other people and
sparking new things in them. So it's unsurprising that you
would say a thing and they're like whoa, And then
like a week later, a month later, they might be like,
oh my god, thank god you said that, you know,
And so you know you are not meant to communicate
like in the moment either, like Erica, it's good to

(15:23):
kind of let things settle and make sure you feel clear.
But your communication is meant to be very impactful. It's
meant to move people in really big ways, and sometimes
it might be in ways.

Speaker 3 (15:31):
They're not ready for.

Speaker 6 (15:33):
Do I need to start my TED talk totally? You
would be amazing that.

Speaker 5 (15:38):
So let me tell you one kind of communication thing
for manifestors that's also relevant to you working together so
manifestors they often don't love to kind of be pestered
with questions. They really tend to do well when they
just and it doesn't mean they can't be asked questions,
but they want to share when they're inspired to and
not because like they're expected to.

Speaker 6 (15:57):
Oh my god, that's so true. Do you feel that,
Oh my god, I'm like google it.

Speaker 3 (16:04):
Yeah, totally.

Speaker 5 (16:06):
And I think so what often is really good for
manifestors is being communicated to, especially when working together, in
a way that allows you to retain your freedom. So
what I mean by that is like just keeping you
in the loop in a way that you can respond
when you need And it's really healthy for you to
kind of keep others in the loop too, like you
know what's going on and you're keeping them informed, but again,
like you can stay in your own creative flow and

(16:26):
you're not kind of being disrupted and pulled out of
it all the time.

Speaker 6 (16:30):
I thought it was add like if too many people
talk to me or tell me their ideas when I'm
already like on another thought path pattern, it completely throws
me off. And I always want to be like, can
you ask permission before you speak to me? Because my
mind can be so one track sometimes, and I thought, like,
for sure, I have an immense amount of add and
I just can't be bombarded with a lot of talking

(16:52):
all the time. But yeah, that makes sense.

Speaker 5 (16:56):
Yeah, And one other piece I would share around communication
is that manifestors in general tend to be very independent
where they kind of like to go off and do
their own thing. And sometimes they go off and do
their own thing and don't let other people know, and
then people can like have reactions to it of like
I can't believe you did this, or they just feel
like they were like not included. And so it is healthy,
although somewhat annoying for you when you're about to go

(17:18):
off and do a new thing and you know it
will really impact other people, just to give them the
heads up that you're doing it, you know, like letting
Erica know that, like I'm gonna be offline for a
little bit, or letting your fiance know that, like I'm
coming home later or whatever the thing is. But just
like keeping people like in the loop so they just
kind of know where you are and kind of bringing
them into your process often is very important for manifestors,
even though it can feel unnatural.

Speaker 6 (17:39):
At first it is unnatural for me, it's particularly in
a relationship, but I realize I think it's because I
think I'm gonna be in trouble. But like now that
I'm in a relationship that it's safe, I'd be like,
I know it's one in the morning, I'll be homing
an hour, you know, Like I'm less Like before, I
probably avoid answering the phone, or i'd make up something,
or i'd be nervous to say the thing. But now

(18:00):
I'm like, I'm outside, i gotta go.

Speaker 3 (18:03):
Yeah.

Speaker 5 (18:04):
It's so funny you say that, because I feel like
I work with so many people with manifestor children, and
they notice that same dynamic where it's like they need
to kind of create this very safe space for them
to just like keep them abreast at what they're doing,
and if they don't feel safe to share it or
feel like they're going to be shut down, then they
just like end up not saying anything, you know. So
I think really having this very healthy communication dynamic where
you're like I can say what I want, I can

(18:24):
do what I want. I don't feel restricted in this way,
and I'm just letting people know because I respect them.

Speaker 6 (18:32):
Do you feel that way with me Erica, then I'm sneaky.

Speaker 2 (18:38):
I haven't at times, Yeah, I would say, well, maybe
in the past when you were having weird relationships with
people that you shouldn't have relationships with, like you.

Speaker 6 (18:47):
I mean no, I was very much being sneaky. I
was hiding it from you, not weird and sneaky, not
the scorpio calling me weird and sneaky. You asked, bitch,
I know, I'm just joking.

Speaker 4 (19:03):
I think that I don't know.

Speaker 2 (19:06):
I think me and me La talk every day, so
there's not like I don't really ever feel like you're
being sneaky or weird.

Speaker 6 (19:15):
No, there's not a lot of space for us to
be sneaky away because i'd be like, bitch, where'd you
go for two hours? Where you're going?

Speaker 2 (19:21):
I mean, I know sometimes you'll tell me things like
three months later, like I didn't want to say I
had to, like I didn't want to tell you this,
but like this is what really happened.

Speaker 6 (19:28):
That's only stuff that I know I shouldn't be doing.
That I know better that I shouldn't be doing anyway,
and I'm embarrassed or like ashamed, but I can't keep
it in either.

Speaker 2 (19:36):
Way.

Speaker 7 (19:36):
I still have to tell you.

Speaker 4 (19:40):
Do you think that I was?

Speaker 2 (19:41):
Because we so we have this guest on recently and
she's like a polyamorous woman, and I'm just wondering, is
there like a is there like a specific Like I'm sorry.

Speaker 4 (19:51):
What do they call these different things?

Speaker 3 (19:52):
Like the types?

Speaker 4 (19:53):
The type?

Speaker 2 (19:54):
There's specific type that is like best suited for that
type of dynamic, like a like a relation ship where
like you're very open and sharing and love in that way.

Speaker 5 (20:03):
You know, I haven't really seen it related to types
where I've seen it. There's a part of our design
called definition, which speaks to how we best process information.
And there's one definition. Neither of you are this, but
it's called triple split. These are weird names, but it
basically needs you means you need a lot of different
stimulation throughout the day, like you need different people and places,
and sometimes that can mean partners, Like obviously I know

(20:25):
so many people with this definition that are not polyamorous,
that are not in multiple relationships, but I've also seen
a number that are, you know, so they just kind
of need lots of different simulation, which can show up
as partners or clients or whatever. So that's where I've
seen it show up the most. I think, you know,
my belief around human design is that it doesn't really
limit like what we can do, Like it doesn't tell
us that we can't be in a polyamous relationship, but

(20:45):
it tells us like how we can do that thing best,
you know, like in a way that will actually feel
sustainable for us.

Speaker 6 (20:53):
Nice interesting question. I feel like I can be stimulated
by like people all day, Like, I mean, sometimes it
gets overwhelming, but sometimes I'm like it's interesting for me
to be in different energies. I was going to ask you,
I know we touched on this the last time you
were here, just because I know most people are when
they're thinking about, you know, different ways that they are.

(21:16):
We're always immediately thinking about astrology, right like what are
your top three? And I know that this does have
something to do a bit with astrology?

Speaker 7 (21:23):
Is this is human designed?

Speaker 6 (21:25):
The Indian man who was walking down the street one
night and got a download and then went home and
wrote it all.

Speaker 3 (21:29):
Out, Yes, but he wasn't Indian. Oh okay, I.

Speaker 6 (21:32):
Don't know where. I just totally made that up in
like nineteen eighty seven or yes, amazing, but yeah, strange
things that I remember, and then add on that I
was not.

Speaker 5 (21:44):
Yeah yet, No, that is that is the origin story.
So astrology plays a role and it kind of pulls
from lots of different systems beyond that too.

Speaker 3 (21:51):
Okay, yeah, I'm.

Speaker 2 (21:53):
Over here trying to find our blueprint. I'm like, where
is the blueprint in my email?

Speaker 3 (21:57):
I think you have a pifference?

Speaker 7 (21:59):
She has it? She has it?

Speaker 4 (22:01):
Are you looking at them right now?

Speaker 3 (22:02):
Right now?

Speaker 4 (22:02):
I have your Oh shit, I'm like forwarded.

Speaker 6 (22:04):
To me because I look, can't I downloaded mine because
I was like trying to read it a lot of times.

Speaker 2 (22:10):
I know, I've found it a few different I've gone
back to it a few different times, and then every
time I'm like.

Speaker 4 (22:15):
Wait, where is it?

Speaker 3 (22:16):
Yeah, I'll re send it.

Speaker 2 (22:19):
So like, for example, when it comes to uh, like relationships,
are there any like human are there any types that
are just not compatible or like as every type can
work and work with what they got as long as
they're clear about their needs, wants and desires.

Speaker 5 (22:40):
I think and to believe the latter, you know that,
I think that human design again like shouldn't restrict who
we can be with. I do think there are some
relationships that can feel easier. You know, if you're with
somebody of a similar type or you share a similar profile,
which is another element of the human design chart, there
might be like a natural sense of harmony where it's like, oh,
we just get each other. But I also find that
we're off attracted a difference. You know, I'm married to

(23:01):
somebody who's got a totally opposite design than mine. You
guys have very different designs in many ways, and so
I think, you know, to your point, as long as
we understand our differences, I think anything's possible.

Speaker 4 (23:12):
You know.

Speaker 5 (23:12):
There are a number of different stories I tell in
the book of couples that came to me who were
really struggling for various reasons, you know, and often when
we went into their design and they're like, oh, nothing's
wrong with us, we're just different. Like in one case,
it was a manifesting generator and a projector, and she
was like, my husband like is a go go goer.
He's like doing so much. I can't keep up with him,
Like I don't think this is sustainable, and like it

(23:34):
was because she was trying to keep up when she
wasn't meant to be like he was meant to be
a constant doer.

Speaker 3 (23:38):
That was not her gift.

Speaker 5 (23:39):
She needed a lot more rest and like once that
difference was understood, things really felt began to flow. And
then I tell another story of two people that came
to me, and one of them was meant to make
decisions instantaneously and in the moment.

Speaker 4 (23:50):
And the other kind of design is that design is that.

Speaker 3 (23:53):
That person had what we call a sacral authority.

Speaker 5 (23:55):
That's another part of your chart around authority, which we
can talk about for you two. And then her partner
had what we call a way to lunar cycle authority,
and he was meant to take it a month before
making big decisions. And so when they came together to me,
they were like, we're trying to decide whether or not
to move to the East coast. And she was so
frustrated by him because she felt like he was waffling,
but he was just like going through his process of

(24:16):
like finding his answers. So I think in relationships we
often can struggle because we just don't understand, you know,
how different somebody is. And same with parenting, like I
have now a manifesting generator daughter and a manifestor daughter.
These are two daughters that are like so different than
me in every possible way, and I think human design
has been such an amazing tool to be Like, I
have no expectation that will be anything like me, what

(24:38):
are you?

Speaker 3 (24:38):
I'm a projector, Like you're your projector.

Speaker 4 (24:40):
Oh okay, yeah that's downfall.

Speaker 2 (24:43):
Help me projector and not tell my boyfriend I'm checking
off things off my list of that talking to my man.

Speaker 5 (24:50):
Well, one thing I'll say about projectors, and I'm curious
if this resonates with you, Like, as projectors, we are
not meant to be these constant doers, you know, and
like we're meant to work in these like intense and
we're much more efficient, I would say, even especially in
your design, Like you are so fast when the energy's there,
but you're meant to kind of follow that up with
a lot of rest. But as projectors, one of our
biggest shadows is being over zealous and not knowing when

(25:12):
to stop and so just.

Speaker 3 (25:13):
Go and go and going.

Speaker 5 (25:14):
So like there might be some version this maybe is
not what happened where you were Like I'm just like
really feeling accomplished by getting things done that you like
didn't quite know when to like walk away and be
like this is maybe not the most important thing right now,
you know, or I can like take a break. I
think as projectors we often have a hard time at first.
And maybe you're good at this now, I know I'm
still learning of like really allowing a lot more space
and rest and pause in our days. That's often when

(25:36):
we're at our best. Like how do you feel like
you relate to rest? Do you feel like you are
good at taking it?

Speaker 2 (25:42):
I think I've had to learn and I'm still learning now,
but I will. I will work myself until I crash out.
And so yeah, and it's because I'm doing.

Speaker 4 (25:53):
Work that I love and I enjoy.

Speaker 2 (25:54):
And I also it's again it's the crossing shit off
my list thing. It's like I just let's just get
it done so that I can can get to the rest.
But then I realize that I don't get to the
rest still, like or in the past, I don't always
get to the rest. Then I'm like, okay, well, now
that that's done, what else you know? And so it's
been it's been challenging because I think people look at
me as very ambitious and it's.

Speaker 4 (26:18):
And I am. I am very ambitious.

Speaker 2 (26:20):
I have a lot of big dreams, and I've accomplished
a lot of things because of that drive, because of
that exact quality. And I've and I've seen it. It's
interesting because I've seen it in my mom in ways,
but my mom actually rests a lot.

Speaker 4 (26:30):
I'm wonder curious what my mom is.

Speaker 2 (26:34):
She's like, she works really hard, but she's always like
taking time for herself.

Speaker 4 (26:38):
She has her.

Speaker 2 (26:39):
Morning walks, that's non negotiable, Like you know, she goes
to the spa. She's always done that, like prioritize like
just little simple pleasures that like she knows help, just
help overall. Whereas for me, I think in the past,
I've i haven't always prioritized those things. I've just been
like all right, whatever, like I'll get to that eventually,

(27:01):
or and then and then and then fortunately then like
everyone pays, because then my attitude's fucked up, and I'm
tired and I'm annoyed, and I'm not even annoyed at
the person that thinks I'm annoyed at them, but now
they think I'm mad at them, and I'm not even
mad at them. I'm just fucking tired, and I'm annoyed
by someone else that did some other shit. But now
I don't know how to compartmentalize my annoyance. So now
everyone's like, oh my god, Eric is mad again, and

(27:24):
I'm like, I'm not even mad at you bitches.

Speaker 5 (27:25):
Yeah, I'm just tired, right, WHOA, I get it. So, yeah, projector,
but I have one more piece to add on this
for you. I'm curious if this one lands. I think
that Yeah, I think just know that as a projector,
like you, are very susceptible to overdoing and not knowing
when to stop. And so, like you said, I think
it does take a little bit more effort for us

(27:46):
to just create space where it's like the intention for
this moment is to be unproductive, because I know my
temptation when I have rest, which is I'm gonna be honest,
not so often right now at this moment with two
young girls, but I think that, like I'm tempted to
make my rest forductive. It's like what can I clean?
What can I organize? What podcasts can I listen to?
What course can I catch up on? And it's just like,
literally what if I just like the goal is not

(28:08):
being productive, And so I think that's been really helpful
of like, and fiction is so good for me for that,
but finding ways to just like not try to produce
more in those down periods, but to really find the
kind of mental rest or physical rest or creative rest
that you need. The other piece that comes up for
you around the lists, and this is actually true for
both of you, is around the fact that you guys

(28:28):
are both meant to be so easily inspired by so
many things, which is obviously the coolest gift, but also
very easily.

Speaker 7 (28:35):
Scattered, like so many ideas, so.

Speaker 5 (28:38):
Many ideas, like way more ideas than you can ever
make manifest Like just that you can get pulled in
so many different directions and according to your designs, Like
you guys are not people that do well without much structure.
Like if you wake up in the morning and you're like, Okay.

Speaker 3 (28:51):
What am I gonna do?

Speaker 5 (28:51):
You can like just like ping pong between different things
and end the day and you're like, I don't even
know what happened?

Speaker 4 (28:56):
Did we do anything? Shit? Get done?

Speaker 7 (29:00):
I just ran around in circles screaming.

Speaker 3 (29:02):
Totally right.

Speaker 5 (29:04):
So the recommendation is to yes, use to do lists,
but very intentionally and like a very focused way. What
I would say is like using lists of like two
to three things each day, like what are the most
important things that I can do?

Speaker 3 (29:16):
So it's not just like.

Speaker 5 (29:17):
Going going going without an intention of like, but these
are the things that would like allow me to end
the day and feel really successful, feel really peaceful.

Speaker 3 (29:25):
With what I accomplished. And so I think that's.

Speaker 5 (29:27):
Another way to look at your to do list of
like was everything on there worth it?

Speaker 2 (29:32):
I love I love that idea about like having like
the last thing on your list feel really good, Like
that makes you feel like you've been successful, That makes
you feel like you've accomplished, so that when you're finally
put that list down, you don't feel like what the
fuck happened? And for me, that last thing and when
I realized, well I've known this, but like I always

(29:54):
work out in the morning, but the other day I
worked out or a few days ago, was it yesterday?

Speaker 4 (29:57):
Two days ago?

Speaker 2 (29:58):
I worked out in the afternoon after we had recorded
like a bunch of we'd recording, we've been recording all week,
and like I ended up working out at the end
of the day and that was like a thing on
my to do list, Like I got to work out,
and I was like when I got there, I was like,
oh God, I don't want to be here, But then
when I left, I was like, oh, I'm so happy
that I did that, even though it was a thing
on my to do list. And yes, working out is

(30:19):
supposed to be great for your body, great for i'm
mental health, but like sometimes it's just like it's just
a doing, and I was I think that that for me,
as putting it in that kind of in that way,
that is what that would be like for me.

Speaker 3 (30:34):
I love that.

Speaker 5 (30:35):
I feel like it does reframe the to do list
where it's like, often like what is the thing that
will feel good to have done? And maybe like the
doing of it will not always be enjoyable, but on
the other side, it will feel worth it. And I
feel like that can help us prioritize the things because,
for instance, in human design, there's a lot of talk
for generators and manifesting generators, which are two different types,
to like follow it lights them up, which is so true,

(30:56):
they're meant to do that, but also it's like follow up,
the follow the things that will make them feel so satisfied,
so satisfied to have done. On the other side, they're like, oh,
I'm so glad I did that, and it might have
been hard, and it might have been like strenuous, and
yet like I'm just I feel so good. I feel
like I use my energy and it really will in
a really good way. Right, yeah, what about you, Mila,

(31:16):
I do feel the scattered energy.

Speaker 3 (31:19):
Sometimes they're trying to pursue everything all at once.

Speaker 7 (31:21):
Girl, I literally am psycho.

Speaker 6 (31:23):
I'd be like, must finish full do paint the whole room,
put up the curtains, put up the shelves, like, and
then it will bother me if it's not done. Then
I'll go get all the paint and then they'll just
sit there and I haven't repotted the plants. But I'm like,
I get like super energized, and then I like fall
back and I get super ocd about it, and then
I fall back and then true like what you said

(31:44):
about when I'm resting or you know, I get so
caught up on fuck. I could be doing this, I
could be doing that, I could be doing this.

Speaker 7 (31:52):
Should I do this?

Speaker 6 (31:53):
I literally yeah, like all the time, like, well I
have to do this. Well, maybe I could do two
things at once. I'm like, no, bitch, you only get
two hands, you know, So it's a constant thing, And
I'm like, I don't know how me and Erica manifested
each other with two scattered brained bitches in one business.
It's just sometimes we conful, like we have so many
ideas and we execute them, but sometimes they're both like

(32:15):
you know, but I mean, I think as we evolve
and get older, it's it's we're i mean, trying to
get more reins on it. But I'm just thinking about
adults in general, and like, I'm wondering how many, like
are you coaching people in a regular basis, like couples,
business partners because I'm just considering like marriages, business partnerships,

(32:37):
they all really need intentional, like can consistent help on
how to communicate. I'm realizing, like with communication as an adult,
like we are so lacking in the training of how
to utilize our language and how to know ourselves.

Speaker 4 (32:54):
You know.

Speaker 6 (32:55):
It's like so often we're giving we're seeking to, like
the Bible or to some religious structure that goes outside
of yourself, when in fact, we really need to understand
our fucking selves and how we communicate, and how we
receive information, and how our partners and our children receive information,
and how they communicate so that we can like create
things together. And even Erica and I like as best

(33:15):
friends as business partners, there's it's been a learning curve.
And you know, and we're both sensitive ass bitches, we're
both water signs, so there's always like there's been a
learning curve of just I think in general, there's humans.
We're in a space where we're so like on the
computer that we forget that there's a way that you know,
different people communicate, and it's like if we can really
dive into that, like this spiritual technology of how to

(33:38):
use language and how we actually operate, we could get
so much further.

Speaker 7 (33:42):
We could probably like have world peace.

Speaker 6 (33:44):
But we're so busy speaking different languages but the same
language but different that it's just we're just not we're
not communicating effectively.

Speaker 5 (33:53):
Yeah, yes, I think to your question, I work with
a lot of teams and couples and families because exactly
what you've said, I feel like there's all this conflict
because people just don't understand each other. And so like,
even my hope for this book is like I hope
people will like read the chapters about themselves, because obviously,
like people will be like oh, I want to know
what this means for me and my career and my relationships.
But even more than that, I hope they then could

(34:15):
have read the chapters about their partners and their kids,
and their colleagues and their parents, because I know, for me,
even writing the chapter on generators, my husband's a generator.
Every single time I read it, which as authors, you
guys know, is like one bajillion times, I would be like,
oh my God, like I like could do this better
to support him, or I can't believe I haven't done this,
you know. So it's like it's just so wild that
every time I'm like, oh, there's I see how I

(34:37):
have been not supporting him according to his design, and
I've been expecting him to be like me. So I
think there's something so powerful about human design offering us
a framework and offering us the language, like you said,
to be able to articulate our needs very clearly and
also really understand people very specifically. You know, I talked
about communication for the two of you, but you might
be somebody who's a generator or manifesting generator, and you

(34:58):
might find that when making decisions, you like to be
communicated to by being asked very specific questions, like let
me take my husband, for example, if I ask him
what do you want to see for dinner, it's like
a blank stare or endless possibilities. But if I'm like,
do you want to go out or cook at home?
Do you want to eat this or this? If I
give him two options, yes, no, He's like absolutely that,
absolutely not, you know, And so I know that for me,

(35:19):
when I pose specific yes no questions, I'm basically bypassing
his mind and speaking straight to his gut. And so
this is so helpful in interacting with people, Like I
sit in sessions with generators all the time. Well We'll
talk around a possibility of something, and then I'll be like,
but do you want to do it? And they're like no,
and I'm like, God, it's as simple as that sometimes,
you know. So I do think when we really take
the time to understand ourselves and others, like, things become

(35:42):
a lot easier.

Speaker 4 (35:44):
Now. I want to know what my boyfriend's.

Speaker 3 (35:46):
Human, You got to look it up.

Speaker 6 (35:47):
And I think Orlando's a projector and I.

Speaker 2 (35:50):
Don't know his time of birth and he's mad at
me right now, so I can't ask.

Speaker 6 (35:53):
It's not the time Texas Mama, I just text Orlando's Momay.

Speaker 5 (36:01):
But doesn't it make you so curious to understand the
other people in your life?

Speaker 4 (36:05):
For sure?

Speaker 2 (36:05):
Because I know that there's ways, there's the miscommunications and
the ways I'm not watering someone or giving them space
or or you know, being there for them in ways
that I'm probably not. And even with my daughter, because
have I checked back in now that she is no
longer I don't know. Maybe she was like five when
we had this interview, she says, yea, and now she's ten,

(36:25):
so her needs have also changed as well. And so like,
how as a ten year old do I support her
as a manifest generator?

Speaker 3 (36:31):
Is that what we said she was manifesting.

Speaker 4 (36:34):
Manifesting generator versus now? And actually yeah?

Speaker 2 (36:37):
How do like what as me as a generator and
our daughter and our daughters being manifesting generators? What is
how does a projector support a manifesting generator?

Speaker 3 (36:47):
Great question?

Speaker 5 (36:48):
So I think like manifesting generators. For those that are
listening that are new to this concept, I imagine many
of you manifesting generators, and we're hoping that we remember
correctly with your daughters. You guys, don't tell me if
this doesn't sound like them, but they're I'm very multi passionate.
They have a lot of charisma, a lot of energy,
a lot of zest. They're kind of meant to like
wake up, use up all their energy in ways that
feel satisfying, and kind of drop in a bed like
delightfully spent. What makes manifesting generators distinct is they often

(37:13):
don't like to be boxed into one thing, and they
tend to not be super linear. They're like, I'm gonna
try this, and I'm gonna try this, and as adults,
that can manifest as somebody who's like an athlete and
also starting a podcast and also a coach and like
opening a bakery, you know, and they just kind of
need that variety in freshness in their lives. So I
think one of the best ways to support manifesting generator
children is really one like just never tempering their enthusiasm

(37:36):
because they're meant to be big and passionate in all
the ways, but also not really requiring them to choose
just one thing, knowing that for them like trying things
on and letting things go as part of their process.

Speaker 3 (37:48):
One story that I share in the book is.

Speaker 5 (37:49):
I had a client who was a generator and his
daughter was a manifesting generator. And he came to me
and he's like, Aaron, like, my daughter is so on focus.
She's like playing lacrosse and sotoftball and volleyball and soccer.
Like she won't choose a thing. And I was like,
she's not meant to. She's like doing it perfectly according
to her design, Like you're somebody who's designed for mastery,
but she's meant to explore the variety. So I mean,

(38:10):
do you guys see that need for variety with the
two of your kiddos, I would say, yeah, I.

Speaker 4 (38:15):
Would say that. Actually, my daughter's a projector. What I
just put her in. I just went onto human design blueprint.

Speaker 2 (38:23):
Dot com, Like you choose to do perfect and I think,
says Irie Gibbs is a natural connector with overflowing wisdom
and insight to share. And then the type that's that's
what you'd be, right, projector projector. Yeah, she's a projector.
We're two projectors. And I wonder, so such bossy bitches.

Speaker 3 (38:39):
Over here, Oh my gosh. Okay, so the question it's
a different question now.

Speaker 4 (38:44):
Yeah, as a projector to a projector.

Speaker 2 (38:46):
I mean, is there a lot of work for me
to do or do this because I'm I am who
I am. I'm just supposed to know exactly how to
support her.

Speaker 5 (38:52):
Well, I think that you the more embodied you are
in your projectorness, the more helpful it will be for her.
So I think, based in our conversation, it feels like
the more you allow and rest, the more permission that
will give her too, because I think as projector, I
grew up with a projector dad, so like, I think
it's such an amazing thing to share. But I think
wherever you can give her rate rest and space and

(39:14):
time alone. Did you feel like she needs that more
than others?

Speaker 3 (39:19):
Does she take it?

Speaker 2 (39:20):
She doesn't like? She well, I guess she'll go be
a little. The only reason she'll be alone because she
wants to be on her iPad. But I guess that's
being alone. But she she was.

Speaker 4 (39:31):
Very social, Yeah, she's very social.

Speaker 2 (39:34):
Yeah, yeah, but I guess yeah, I mean, I guess
she does like to rest.

Speaker 4 (39:38):
She definitely is like, I'm tired, I need to take
a nap. I want to take a nap. I'm like,
what the fuck you're ten? Get out?

Speaker 3 (39:46):
Well, the other I want to take a nap too, totally.

Speaker 5 (39:49):
The other piece I would share as a projector, and
that speaks to kind of your guys is the first
question is that projectors do really well when they're invited
in and so.

Speaker 4 (39:57):
Also but yes, yes, I said, I see that with.

Speaker 5 (40:00):
Her, so really inviting her in. And often projectors do
really well with specific acknowledgment. And so, Mila, this is
actually another thing just to know about Erica, Like it
can be really good to like let projectors know like
exactly what you see, and then we often love words
of affirmation, so not just like you're great, but like, God,
I love the way that you like responded to this thing,
Like I love your perspective on this. Like when projectors
feel really authentically and specifically recognize, it gives us so

(40:23):
much energy to show up. And so one that's like
a need that Erica you might have sometimes. But also
that's something you can give your daughter, because when projectors
don't feel recognized, we can like fight for recognition and
then it just becomes like this really bitter cycle that
doesn't really make us feel very good.

Speaker 2 (40:37):
No, I feel like I think I think part of
that the lack of that which I've experienced.

Speaker 4 (40:43):
It becomes like you start to question your confidence.

Speaker 2 (40:45):
You start to become unconfident in ways in spaces that
you actually are are gifted in totally, and you're like
questioning yourself because no one has said anything about it.
And yeah, so I think that that's actually a really
good tip for a projector and from me to also
make sure that I'm doing that with my daughter, which
I think I'm pretty I'm pretty good at, but now
that I know that that's something that she needs, I'll

(41:06):
do I'll try even harder.

Speaker 3 (41:08):
Yeah, but it's I think that's such a beautiful quality
to share. But now you see to look up your.

Speaker 6 (41:11):
Boyfriend, I see that, I see like it's interesting.

Speaker 7 (41:15):
I see that.

Speaker 6 (41:16):
I know that I'm not conscious about affirming people because
I just I have I wasn't affirmed a lot growing up,
So it's not my language, you know, it's not like
my go to. But I find this with my man,
and I'm you know, trying to incorporate with my daughter.
And like even with Erica, I noticed like there's so
many things I admire about her and she does really
really well and I just assume that she knows and

(41:39):
then I also see her sometimes struggling like I could
be I could sound smarter. I could, and I'm like,
what are you talking about. You're just fucking.

Speaker 7 (41:45):
Brilliant, you know what I mean.

Speaker 6 (41:46):
And I see like that, I see where she probably
could benefit for me telling her the things that I
think she does really well, like in motherhood and at
work or whatever, even though like I know and I
just assume she knows it, and I think I'm just
not good. I haven't been good at like affirming people
because it's just not my my my default. So I

(42:06):
can see that too, like even in you know, my friend,
and even also like what you were saying about getting
like getting manic, like I'm so like so deep into
something that you're just like you crash out being productive.
I'm like, girl, you gotta take a break. We're not
even making any sense right now.

Speaker 7 (42:25):
We gotta take it.

Speaker 6 (42:25):
We gotta take a take, we gotta take a step break,
we gotta take a break. This is not making any sense.
And even particularly just considering that where you're at, like
about to launch this book, I can only imagine where
you're at, because particularly when we were publishing our book,
it was just such an intense time, and it felt
like there was so much pressure and we were just like,
you know, there was so much pressure on us. So
I'm just I'm happy that we're revisiting this and you know,

(42:47):
having this conversation with you to kind of like refresh
on the things that you know, how we show up
in the world and the things that we need and
how we need to communicate. I looked it up on
Human Design Blueprint and Luna is the manifesting generator.

Speaker 5 (43:03):
Okay, so we do have a manifesting generator. I was like,
I'm sorry for totally misremembering that. Do you recognize that
in her kind of that like charisma and zest and
multi passionate nature.

Speaker 4 (43:14):
Yeah.

Speaker 6 (43:15):
Yeah, she's just like wants to dance and she wants
to sing, but she's also very self assured, like, no, mom,
I'm good, I don't want to do that. I'm resting.
I'm like, yeah, what are you resting from your date?
Your full time job? But yeah, I see she's charismatic
and likes to do different things, and so like, I
do resonate with that in her.

Speaker 5 (43:34):
Yeah, and I think, you know, manifesting generators what I
often see as they grow older is they feel like
they have to like choose one path or do just
one thing, and so often it can feel like so
much for mission to be like I don't have to
choose just one thing. I could be so many things,
because often that variety is the thing that actually brings
them the most satisfaction.

Speaker 6 (43:51):
And then I know you were talking about like lipstime,
we talked like our human design. Like for instance, I'm
a manifestor the manifestors in the driver's seat, right, and
then there's there's also something that's right in your passenger seat,
and then there's something that's in your back seat. So
there could you could be one thing specifically, but you
can also have you know a little bit of these
other three things. I guess kind of like like big three,

(44:13):
you know, like there might be something that you also
resonate with that's right here next to you and vice versa.

Speaker 5 (44:20):
Yeah, and there are like the type is such an
important part of our chart, and it's just the first piece,
like the blueprints that you guys have and these are
just kind of hyper personalized guides to your design.

Speaker 3 (44:29):
There are four hundred.

Speaker 5 (44:30):
Thousand possible versions of that blueprint, you know, So it's
like isn't that crazy? So it's like it's not just
like again, your type is amazing and there's so much
more underneath it. So your type kind of speaks to
how you best use your energy. But then it's around
like how do you best create opportunities for yourself?

Speaker 3 (44:45):
How do you best make decisions?

Speaker 5 (44:47):
You know, what are your biggest challenges like getting distracted
and things like that. So it gives us so much
more nuance. I'm actually curious to revisit your guys's decision
making strategies. Are you guys open to doing that?

Speaker 3 (44:58):
Yeah?

Speaker 2 (44:59):
I'm also looking at the blueprint and I'm so you
found it.

Speaker 7 (45:02):
I just amailed it to you. I emailed to yours.

Speaker 2 (45:04):
Yeah, I was looking at that the definite. My definition
definition is as collaborative. Yeah, the definition like how I
work best? Is that what that means?

Speaker 4 (45:15):
Like? Yeah, it's so funny.

Speaker 2 (45:17):
Because I had this conversation the other day or with
myself and then I think on the podcast with Mila,
and I was saying, how like, you know, me and
Mila have been doing the show for seven years, and
like you know, in our journey now we've like started
to like hone our own skills as individuals. We've done
everything together and now like kind of going off on
our own and like seeing what there is in the
world to do as individuals in this space, and I

(45:40):
felt like I needed to figure out something to do
on my own, and I was like really like stressing
out about.

Speaker 4 (45:46):
It, like what is my path alone?

Speaker 2 (45:49):
And I really that I had this deep realization where
it's like I actually really like working with people, like
I don't want to do it alone. I actually didn't
succeed alone before I met Jamila that and I always
felt like a failure because of it. And so then
me trying to go back and fit a circle into
a square because now I feel like I've acquired all
these tools, all this knowledge, I'm supposed to now go

(46:10):
and like do something alone. And I was like no,
And I feel like I finally realized that this is
very recent, so seeing this on here is very affirming
for me. I'm like, Okay, yes, I.

Speaker 6 (46:21):
Knew that, which is interesting because mine sets independent and
I feel like I'm a collaborative person, like I prefer
to work with people. But then also I started a
podcast with my boyfriend last year, and sometimes we're working
together and I'm like shut the fuck up. And I'm like, no,
I don't like that idea. So it's so I'm like

(46:43):
I think that I like collaborative because I'm a people
person and I want to collaborate, and I work so
well with Erica and we've had so much success together.
But now I'm just like looking at I'm like independent.
I'm like, well, maybe I am a bitch. Maybe i I'm.

Speaker 5 (46:56):
Okay, let me explain it a little bit more, because
I think that you It's like these things always have
some nuance. Like you and your design, Jamila, you like
have a real need for community and people and friendships,
so like that's just like part of who you are.
Like it's not having a massive community, but having like
a really good community and being around friends, so.

Speaker 3 (47:14):
Like that's integral.

Speaker 5 (47:15):
But you do have this this very independent nature which
is not about being alone all the time, but it
does mean that like you really need space in your
days to just work and be in your own flow.
Like these are people that are often like do not
like a ton of meetings. Like it's like, let me
just like keep their like necessary meetings and be really
efficient in those. So it's more that like your independence
is honored and that's when you can really kind of
be at your best. So it's not about not being

(47:36):
around people, but I think it's about not feeling like
you're like needed by people all the time and that
you can go do your own thing and be free
to do that. And sometimes people are threatened by that independence.
You know, often in partnership it's like I want you
to need me more, and it's like for you, it's
not about partnering with people that like complete you, but
it's partnering with people that like just amplify everything in
your life and make things better and like you love it.

Speaker 3 (47:56):
But it's not.

Speaker 5 (47:56):
Because like you need them. It's because like you choose
them and you want them.

Speaker 6 (48:01):
Yeah, sometimes as a mom and a fiance, I'm like
I've said this like before, I'm like, everybody needs me
and I'm overwhelmed. Stop needing me. I'm like, bitch, it's
you're her parents, like you know, so it's you know,
like sometimes I feel like I say this, like everyone's
taking for me and like energetically, and I feel terrible

(48:21):
saying that, but I think it's because I haven't honored
the part of me that needs to be like take
time away sometimes because I've just I do really get
energized by my community. I do have really good friends
and friendships, and I love that. But sometimes I realize,
like when I, you know, go to the gym alone,
I'm like, oh my god, I need four fucking hours,
you know, just to be in my own thoughts with
nothing and no one, no distractions, because my mind is

(48:42):
so one tracked. So that makes that makes more sense.

Speaker 5 (48:46):
Yes, okay, And I think and I love what you
said Eric around the collaborative because I had the same
thing of my design and I'm the same It's just
like it's so different doing it all with other people.
And again, this is not about you not having time alone.
You also need time alone as a projector especially. But
I would say one tool for you with that definition
is that whenever you feel stuck or if things are
not flowing or you can't really kind of like make

(49:08):
something happen, being around others is like the most supportive
thing you can do. And being around others could be
like having a phone call together. It could be working
from a coffee shop or going for a walk. It
could be like having headphones on and not talking to anybody,
but just being around other people's energy.

Speaker 4 (49:21):
So it's like me at the gym.

Speaker 3 (49:23):
It's so good for you, you know.

Speaker 5 (49:25):
So it's like just know that, like when you're stuck,
being around others in that way is often very activating
for you and can kind of help you move through that.

Speaker 4 (49:33):
Awesome. Awesome. I didn't mean to interrupt you. I know
you were going to go into.

Speaker 3 (49:37):
Something community making a decision.

Speaker 5 (49:39):
Now I want to go through another can I okay,
I'm going to go through another thing and then I'll
return to that because I love this and I'm reminded
of this. There's a part of our design called profile,
which I'm not going to get into all the technical
things because I know the names can be a little
bit weird. But you guys both have a six in
your profile. So if you guys are looking at your
chart at Human Design Blueprint and you see that you're
three six or four six or six two or six three,

(49:59):
this also lies to you. But I just love that
you guys share it because it also makes sense why
you guys are such good partners. I find that when
you share a profile, like it's just like you just
get each other in a really cool way. But it
means that you guys are both like such natural role models,
like people that are really meant to just you know
embody like your authenticity so deeply and just inspire others
because like you guys are just being yourselves, Like that's kind.

Speaker 3 (50:21):
Of your job.

Speaker 5 (50:22):
But the part that I actually wanted to share is
that you guys are meantit your prime when you turn
fifty and up. So like you guys are really I
don't know if I mentioned this before, So like basically
the first thirty years of your life is meant to
be like trou and Eric Galore throwing things against the wall.
See what happens thirty to fifty is really a time
to kind of integrate all the lessons that you've learned.
It's a time for a little bit more observation. You

(50:44):
might find that more and where people are coming before
your wisdom. But you're really meant to kind of be
at your prime of sharing your gifts fifty and beyond
when like you really have like integrated it all so
deeply that like, again, like you inspire others because you're
just being yourself so fully. So I have a six
to two, so I'm like kind of obsessed with this
part of the chart. But I just think it's really
beautiful that you guys share.

Speaker 4 (51:01):
That it's getting started.

Speaker 6 (51:03):
Baby, I know when you said it almost maybe when
to cry, like I you know, we started Good Moms
when we were thirty. Wow, like literally I had just
like we she I think, yeah, we had just started
the thirties, like it was very the beginning. And yeah,
we've been doing this for seven years and there was
a like prior to that, it was a lot of
I don't know what the fuck I was doing. But this,

(51:25):
this this last you know, decade, has been so life
changing just because like China start to sort things out,
and I resonate with that so deeply because I'm like, oh, fifty, shit,
that's when it's gonna start making sense, because it's it's
slowly starting to make sense.

Speaker 5 (51:39):
But yeah, okay, yeah, And I will say that I
sit with a lot of people in their forties that
have this six in the profile, and I just like
I love observing it because it becomes this like crazy
period of transformation because it feels like people become like
allergic to anything that's like not fully aligned, and so
they're just kind of like letting them all these things
because they're just intolerant of it, and they just become

(52:01):
so much clearer on like these are the things because
I feel like in some ways they're like preparing to
be a role model. They're like preparing to lead others
in that way. So it's fun to sit within them
in that journey. Okay, do you resonate with that, Erica?

Speaker 4 (52:15):
I do. I do.

Speaker 2 (52:16):
I think I'm already. I've already. I don't want to
say I mastered that at all, but I've started that.
I would say around thirty. Yeah, around the thirties is
when I really started doing that or I was like no more, nope, nope, nope.
And I've resisted at sometimes in relationships specifically typically with work. No,

(52:36):
like very much like me and Mila and I think
individually too, like my intuition, if it's like not aligned,
I'm like, we're pretty much like, Okay, well it's not aligned.
I mean know something else is on the way. There's
not like forcing anything or anyone or any situation to
try to stay and figure it out if it's not
doesn't feel good.

Speaker 5 (52:56):
Yeah, exactly, Okay, vision making piece. I just wanted to
mention only because the book a big part of it
is around decisions, because we're all making decisions every day
and every day so many and you guys are meant
to make decisions very differently. And I don't remember whether
we touched on this the first time, but Erica, for you,
you're meant to be actually a very spontaneous and fast

(53:17):
decision maker. Like it's this kind of quiet whisper of
your intuition that speaks to you and then you're meant
to just take action. But I will say, of all
the possible ways of making decisions and human design, yours
is the absolute quietest. And so it can take effort
and time and space for other people to really access it,
because if you're around others that have really strong feelings
about something, you might kind of get swept away with

(53:40):
their feelings and disconnect from your own feelings. So I
would say for you, it's about making very fast, spontaneous
decisions that come without a reason, and that come from
kind of a quiet whisper or residence that you feel.

Speaker 3 (53:51):
How does that sound to you?

Speaker 4 (53:53):
I haven't say I resonate with that.

Speaker 2 (53:54):
I think that i've I'm I think that I am
spontaneous in way that in that regard, I think even
like looking a trip, I'm very much like if I'm
gonna go Like, if I don't do it now, I'm
not gonna do it, go do it figure it out later.
I think even in our business, there's been times where
like we've been like interviewing people and I'm like, we're
hiring her. I know, it just is it? And me

(54:15):
I was like, bitch, we just like wait, hold.

Speaker 6 (54:17):
On, I'm like, I don't know, her face seems not trustworthy.

Speaker 2 (54:21):
You know, and like you know, and but granted, like,
even even with those choices, those quick decisions, even if
they don't work out, I always feel like there was
a reason why we like we moved forward in that
in that quick decision, and it benefited us to get
to the next person or the next thing. But I
generally know pretty quickly whether or not like this is
gonna work or feel it out. Although I have been wrong,

(54:44):
I've been wrong, you know, And that's probably layered into
just some other shit, just like like.

Speaker 4 (54:50):
Being judgmental or.

Speaker 2 (54:54):
Allowing someone or something to mirror another situation and it's
not the same situation.

Speaker 6 (55:01):
We're not gonna always be right, We're not We're gonna
we have to be wrong sometimes to learn right.

Speaker 3 (55:06):
Yeah, that's right.

Speaker 2 (55:08):
But I definitely say like I'm very much usually very
quick to know. And that's also hasn't always been great
for other people because they think, like what the fuck,
like she's leaving, Yeah, I don't want to.

Speaker 5 (55:19):
Be right right, and other people can like interpret it
as like too fast or too rast or like not thoughtful,
and it's just like you're meant to be fast that way.
You know, a lot of people don't arrive at clarity
that quickly, but you do.

Speaker 4 (55:31):
I'm just gonna telling people it's my human design.

Speaker 3 (55:33):
I don't know authority.

Speaker 6 (55:36):
My human design says I've got to get out of here.

Speaker 4 (55:38):
My projector is telling me now.

Speaker 3 (55:41):
Yeah, you can be like talk to erin, I'm out
human design. Yeah.

Speaker 5 (55:45):
And then for you, Mila, you are what we call
an emotional authority, so you're kind of the opposite here,
Like you know, for the small decisions in your life,
like if you want to make fast decisions, that makes
a lot of sense and is recommended, but for the
bigger decisions, like you're actually really meant to give yourself
a moment and it's not about like giving yourself a
month or creating a pro commnce, but it's just giving
yourself like a day or two or three and seeing

(56:07):
if your excitement sustains, because you're somebody who might experience
a lot of emotion or at a thing, like you
might be on an emotional high and you're like, yes,
I'm into it, and then you might wake up the
next day and you're like, I don't want to do that,
And so like just giving yourself a little bit of
a buffer time to just see what stays true and
what remains consistent is the best thing for you. And
as somebody that also has this, I find it very annoying,

(56:27):
and yet I've just often found it so worth it
because I tend to really regret the decisions I rush
into because I change.

Speaker 6 (56:33):
My mind yeah yeah, I think I've had a history
of like okay, yeah, sure whatever, and then later like
I didn't think that through. I didn't like that, I
don't like how that feel. I don't like how that felt,
and also like beating myself up over it about like
I think, because I'm such a sensitive person, I feel
things for a long time. So like my go to

(56:55):
if I've made a decision that I don't love, I've
often felt like shame and guilt about it, and then
I shut it away, like I don't even look at
it because I don't want to feel the thing. And
that also, you know, we all know that that only
lasts for so long. It's going to re emerge some way, somehow.
So yeah, I think in this iteration of my life,
I've learned that just like processing things taking a little

(57:17):
bit of time. And I know I thought it was
because I'm like a Libra moon that like I'm like,
how does this person feel?

Speaker 7 (57:22):
How does this feel? Like I'm always my boyfriend.

Speaker 6 (57:24):
It's really irritated with me because I'm constantly like, I
don't know, how do you think this will hurt this person?
Like how do you think they're going to take it?
What about Like I'm looking from everybody's perspective before I'm
making a decision, and he's like, bitch, if you do,
just don't make a decision.

Speaker 4 (57:37):
Girl.

Speaker 7 (57:38):
So it's like, you know, I resonate with that.

Speaker 5 (57:41):
Yeah, But it's really helpful to know that around the
people that we love, because it's just like, oh, like
they might need more time, they might need to talk
things out, they might need to sleep on things, and
they're often pretty different than we are.

Speaker 7 (57:52):
Well, I have a question.

Speaker 6 (57:53):
I'm looking at this very interesting like can you see it?

Speaker 4 (57:56):
This?

Speaker 2 (57:56):
Oh?

Speaker 3 (57:56):
I can see it? Yeah, yeah, I.

Speaker 6 (57:58):
Mean it's yours. You know, you may, but I'm like,
this is crazy. It looks like very robotic. It's a level. Yeah,
it's a robot boom. But at the bottom here it says,
it says, right angle Cross of the Vessel of Love
fifteen ten, twenty five forty six, what's incarnation cross?

Speaker 5 (58:21):
The Incarnation Cross basically speaks to kind of like your
greater your greater purpose and kind of like what you're
here to do?

Speaker 3 (58:30):
Can you guys hear me? Okay?

Speaker 5 (58:31):
Yeah, And so it doesn't really give you all these
like tools to walk into it, but it just speaks
to kind of like what you're here to do in
your life. And so for you specifically, you're somebody who
really learns from the extremes. You're kind of meant to
go to the extremes of life and kind of gather
all the wisdom and bring up back and share it
with us.

Speaker 6 (58:49):
Do you feel that I'm pretty extreme? I feel I
feel that for her. I feel it for her. I'm like,
but did you really have to do all that. Yeah,
had to go all the way, had to go all
the way, all the way.

Speaker 3 (59:06):
It's part of who you are.

Speaker 5 (59:07):
And then I would say another part of your purpose
is like you're somebody who you might go through these
really intense periods in your life, but you've got this
real resilience and ability to kind of bounce back and
learn from them and grow. You know, this kind of
just like even this innocence that allows you to just
kind of grow from everything regardless of how hard. So
that's part of the journey. But the kind of extremes
piece is really important.

Speaker 6 (59:26):
And yeah, okay, thank you.

Speaker 3 (59:30):
Mm hmmm, Erica, you want to know about yours?

Speaker 2 (59:33):
Sure, a cross of wishes left angle, cross of wishes.

Speaker 5 (59:38):
I think for you, like you're somebody who's a very
has a very influential voice. It's unsurprising that you do
what you do, but you also are somebody who's like
a very natural caretaker and nurture in many ways. But
I think for you, it's all about having a lot
of discernment about what who you take care of, what
responsibility you take on, and like what you can actually
be genuinely responsible for in your life, Like obviously not

(01:00:00):
somebody else's happiness, but like your day to day or
your daughter or things like that. So you do this
very nurturing energy, but you're meant to kind of wield
that really intentionally and not you know, sacrifice your own
well being in the process.

Speaker 6 (01:00:12):
Hmm.

Speaker 2 (01:00:14):
Yeah, Hey, I feel that. What about the notes not
Self theme bitterness? Because I was reading that, my My,
this a little bit about that, and I definitely was like, yeah,
that it's and part of that is the inviting in
piece and how if I'm not invited in, there's a
bitterness that can take place. Yeah, and I resonate with

(01:00:36):
that a lot, actually, now that I see it written out.

Speaker 5 (01:00:41):
Well, I think it's So this is a part of
our design called not Self and signature, and they are
these very simple sign posts that basically reveal whether we're
on or off track, and they go by type and
so for example, as a projector Erica, the signal that
you're on track in your life is a feeling of success,
and of course that can manifest its financial success, but
it's often just a feeling of like I feel so
recognized and appreciated for like who I am and what

(01:01:03):
I can bring to the table and like I feel
really energized because of it. On the other side of
it is the bitterness, and that's often rooted like you said,
and like not feeling recognized, not feeling appreciated, not feeling
invited in, feeling you have so much to share but
nobody's asking you, feeling like you're kind of like burning out,
trying to do everything, and like not really seeing much
result from it. And so for you and your life,
when bitterness starts to show up in a really consistent way,

(01:01:26):
it basically is an invitation to step back and ask yourself,
is this really still the right use of my energy?
Like do I need a course correct here? Do you
feel those kind of pillars?

Speaker 2 (01:01:36):
Yeah, for sure, definitely I feel that in a lot
of different ways within my family dynamic. I mean I
think maybe I've even felt that with me and Jamila
as dynamic in ways as we've like like I said,
like as we've like explored going off on our own
things of like me wanting to feel invited in me
wanting to feel like a part of it because we've
been so like emmeshed together. Yeah, and so there's like

(01:02:02):
I guess for me, like I thought, maybe it was
like possessiveness or maybe it is layered with that and fear.
There's like fear being left behind or fear of like
I guess.

Speaker 4 (01:02:14):
I don't know. I think it's being left behind.

Speaker 2 (01:02:16):
And then also like the not being invited in thing
or like why are you being sneaky?

Speaker 4 (01:02:21):
Are you being secretive?

Speaker 2 (01:02:22):
What?

Speaker 4 (01:02:22):
What the fuck are you doing? Whereas Mila is like.

Speaker 2 (01:02:24):
I'm off to a moutain thing. I told you something
and that was it. I thought that was the end
of the conversation, and I'm like, bitch, I need more conversations.

Speaker 6 (01:02:31):
Yeah, I didn't sound like you wanted to hear the
rest of the conversation.

Speaker 7 (01:02:34):
It seemed like you didn't want to know, So I
just went and did it.

Speaker 6 (01:02:39):
What do you mean, I'm I told you I went
to Croatia.

Speaker 2 (01:02:45):
Yeah, so I definitely resonate with that and knowing that now,
I guess maybe I can like express that to other people,
like this is what I need in order to feel
like safe, This is what I need in order to
feel like, yeah, I missed, I guess like safe and
like that that we're still connected, that we're still here with.

Speaker 3 (01:03:02):
One another totally.

Speaker 5 (01:03:03):
Yeah, And this is I think also goes back to
that part that we talked about for Mela of informing
and keeping people in the loop, because you know, she
is so naturally independent, where's like I'm just gonna go
off and do my own thing, but like kind of
just like keeping the people that matter informed and like
they're kind of respected in the process and included can
be really important.

Speaker 6 (01:03:21):
It's so crazy because like I feel independent, but I
also feel like I don't know same thing with Erica.
Like we've done this for a very long time together.
We've gotten a lot of success together, a lot of
our highs highs have been through this business together, and
like I mean, obviously there's fear of being left behind,
fear of being left fear, you know, there's just fear

(01:03:42):
of doing things alone because we've done so much together.
But also like, bitch, we're not Siamese twins, you know,
like your adults.

Speaker 7 (01:03:49):
You know, like are you sure? So I feel like I.

Speaker 6 (01:03:52):
Do feel independent, but in ways I do also feel
very like attached, you know, like so attached to partnership,
so attached to collaboration, so attached to Erica, you know,
just specifically, if I'm being honest, so I just like
I feel like I'm being like I think I feel independent,
but a lot of times I feel codependent. So I'm

(01:04:13):
just like I feel codependent to it sometimes where it's debilitating,
like should I do this?

Speaker 7 (01:04:19):
A lot like should I do this? She gonna be
mad at me?

Speaker 6 (01:04:21):
Like and it's interesting because like as we're talking about this,
like basically shadowness, you know, the shadow side of us.
I think when we have this perspective and I'm not
sure mine means yet, it gives us the opportunity to
ai to be like, this is what I need and
then be once you can recognize the thing that you need,

(01:04:43):
you can say like am I leaving space for someone
to do that?

Speaker 4 (01:04:47):
You know what I mean?

Speaker 6 (01:04:48):
I think there's been times like me and Erica have had.
You know, we've been friends for a long time, ten years,
and there's been more difficult times than others. We're generally
we've gotten you know, we have a great relationship, we're
best fucking friends, we're sisters. But then times where I'm like, well,
did you want me to tell you? Because you didn't
seem like you were really open to hearing this conversation.
You didn't seem like you were receiving it, and I'm
so sensitive. So I'm like, if you're not smiling and

(01:05:09):
keep king with me, then I'm just gonna shut the
fuck up, you know, Like it didn't seem like you
wanted to know, it didn't seem like you cared, and
so like I'm going off of like her energy and
she's like, bitch, why didn't you tell me? And so
there's all these like these components you know here. But
also like once we can understand what we need, we
can also be like am I being am I being

(01:05:29):
open to the things that I actually need to you
know what I mean? Like am I am I showing
up in a way that I you know, like I
could be like, hey, Mila, this is what I need
from you to feel safe. And also like language, because
like we often go with the defense the most defense,
like you're leaving me out, like fuck you, Like I'm
gonna you know, like, well I'm gonna go do this
over here when not.

Speaker 7 (01:05:46):
Say shit or whatever.

Speaker 6 (01:05:47):
Like our first I think as humans is to defend ourselves.
And so instead of just being like, actually my feelings
were hurt because I'm feeling unsafe in our friendship, I'm
feeling unsafe in our business. I'm feeling scared. You know,
those are not words that we generate go to first,
to be go to.

Speaker 2 (01:06:01):
Like she had an attitude. She didn't ask me like questions,
so now she doesn't want to know shit. It's actually no,
I'm processing because this is new information and like I
need a second and I'm not like, you know, there's
just like there's layers to it. But I think because
because we are both so sensitive and so I think
I think we're trying to consider each other all the time,
and also like maybe misreading each other sometimes too, Like

(01:06:24):
there becomes like then this wall that goes up that's
actually unnecessary if.

Speaker 4 (01:06:29):
We were able to communicate or.

Speaker 2 (01:06:31):
Or even have this kind of information and knowing like, oh,
Erica needs to be brought into the conversation. Oh, Mela
actually really does need independence, but she does enjoy being
amongst people, Like even though she does like to be
amongst people, because I always say, like Mela like always
needs to be around people. She likes to be outside.
She's like she loves conversating with people. But then I
also know that there is the piece of her that

(01:06:53):
night like needs to be alone. But sometimes I forget
about that piece because I always see her being immersed
amongst the people and engaging with people. So I think
like knowing that, remembering that because you were you did
do this for us, but like so we.

Speaker 4 (01:07:09):
Were like I feel like we were like also very
early in our business too.

Speaker 2 (01:07:12):
Yeah, you know, I think you know, we were still
figuring it out. We've evolved so much as friends, We've
evolved so much as as women in relationships now as moms,
all these things, Like there's a lot of things that
have happened that it's actually really beneficial to if you've
ever if you're listening right now, you've ever done a
human design maybe you did it a while ago, to
come back and revisit it and see how do these

(01:07:33):
things relate to who you are? How are you practicing
these things in your relationship dynamics right now? How can
you and and see how your life might transform in
that way?

Speaker 4 (01:07:43):
I know I'm excited to do it.

Speaker 6 (01:07:44):
This might I feel like this might be something that
like relationships, close relationships need like refreshing every year, you
know what I mean, Like if we.

Speaker 7 (01:07:53):
Like decided to like deeply like every year.

Speaker 6 (01:07:56):
I think any partnership romantic or others should be like,
let's go get our charts read, let's go to our
human design again. Let's go revisit these things so that
we know at the beginning of the year or whatever
part of the year, halfway through the year, that we're
still on the same page. And if there are things
that have erupted, which you know, we're humans, there's there's
other lenses of trauma and experiences that could you know

(01:08:17):
that also influence how we show up. But like I
think if you're keeping that on the top of your
your friendless or your partnership list, it's like going to
always keep you like in mind of where you're at
and where the person that you're close with is too.

Speaker 3 (01:08:32):
Yeah, one hundred percent.

Speaker 5 (01:08:34):
And I do you know, I think when you guys
get the finished copies of the book, I would recommend
that you guys read the chapters in each other.

Speaker 3 (01:08:40):
I think it's going to be so interesting to be like, oh,
you know, I see why.

Speaker 5 (01:08:45):
And one thing I wanted to say to you, Mila,
and then we'll talk about your signature not self, is
you are meant to inform people, like we talked about
like letting people know what's up, but you're also meant
to let people know what's up once you come to
clarity on your own. Like I find where manifestors can
struggle is when they actually let people into their process
a little bit too early and kind of like open
themselves up to this external feedback and then kind of

(01:09:06):
get unnecessarily swayed. And so like in an ideal world,
you kind of like reach your own point of like
this is what I know I want to do, and
then you kind of bring people in the loop.

Speaker 6 (01:09:14):
Yeah, I can get confused.

Speaker 7 (01:09:16):
I get confused easily.

Speaker 3 (01:09:18):
I imagine.

Speaker 5 (01:09:19):
You know you're really sensitive, like you said, and so
that's also just part of your processes like let me
come to this and then like let me bring the
people in and convey that respect. That way the peace
around the bitterness and success.

Speaker 3 (01:09:30):
So that was true for Erica. For you, when you're
on track.

Speaker 5 (01:09:33):
It's meant to show up as a feeling of peace,
and peace is off in a sense of like you
feel empowered, you feel free, you can do what you want,
when you want, how you want, nobody's telling you what
to do. You can initiate new ideas as they come,
So that kind of piece is off and rooted in
a sense of just like inherent freedom, relationships that make
you feel free, you know, like a work structure that
makes you feel free. When you're off track, it can

(01:09:55):
manifest as anger. What anger tends to be rooted in
is a feeling of empowerment. It's like, I don't feel
empowered to do what I want when I want. I
feel constricted, I feel confined. I don't feel like I
can like really do things my way. And so I
think someonear what we're talking about with Erica. When that
anger kind of disempowered feeling starts to kind of rear
its head in a more consistent way, it's just a
signal that like either something needs to be changed or

(01:10:17):
a conversation needs to be had, you know, Like for Erica,
I feel better, it's like, let's have a conversation. I'm
not really feeling super recognized here, so I'm curious you
recognize those two pillars for you, I.

Speaker 6 (01:10:28):
Think, so I know, I am very clear when I'm
feeling at peace and things feel good and I'm in
a good space, and then I'm also like I think
that for me, anger can come up as like resentment
and like irritation, like a constant little like totally and
it's like, well, what the fuck is wrong with you, bitch?
You know, but it's like I can I can recognize that,

(01:10:51):
Like if if work doesn't feel like in flow, there
feels like there's like constantly a wall, like it just
it doesn't feel good for me, and I can I
can feel it imediately like a cancer, you know, like
it's just it could take over how I'm feeling all
the time because I'm pretty like easy going. I feel
like and flow, So when things are not feeling there's

(01:11:11):
like something in my stomach, then I'm like, hmm, this
is something doesn't feel right.

Speaker 5 (01:11:17):
Yeah, it's something we didn't really talk about, but it's
so true for manifestors. Is your energy similar to air
co but a little bit different, is very birsty, Like
you're meant to have these periods, whether it's like a
couple of days, hours, or weeks, where you're super on
fire and really inspired, and then that's followed by periods
where like you're not, like you're meant to kind of
pull back and be in your own space and rest.

(01:11:37):
And it's so important to kind of follow up those
periods of creation with moments of seclusion in some way
or kind of rest, because that's when like new ideas
will bubble up. And so you know, just allowing that,
do you feel that kind of natural flow in your
own life?

Speaker 6 (01:11:50):
Yeah, I think we've actually created that natural flow in
our own life by having work that requires us to
be in America and be in our computers, and then
every couple of months we're like, Okay, we gotta go.
We go do work that it requires us to be
in person and be at the beach with our titties out,
you know what I mean. Like that is like it's
still work, but it shows up differently and every time,
like we're about to leave on Monday to retreat, and

(01:12:12):
I'm like this has like this is what needs to
happen right now. Like I'm feeling that energy of like, yeah,
we're still working, but it's at a different level of work.

Speaker 7 (01:12:21):
And like we just you know, we did that in.

Speaker 6 (01:12:23):
February, so like it's about that time in April, and
then it'll be about that time in June in August,
and so like I think we kind of have built
this life where we kind of get to ride that
wave of rest in some ways, even though like we're
still working, it's still like a different type of work.
And I think like in subconsciously we have built a
life where that has kind of honored how we work together,

(01:12:45):
because I think sometimes when we do finally go out
of town and we're alone and we're like settled to
be like I got a good idea, you know what
I mean, and then we can kind of like let
it be burst and like talk about it and like
you know what I mean, it just gives us a
little bit of period of rest, which I think is
really important.

Speaker 5 (01:13:01):
Yeah, well, I love that because you guys both have
that need for the ebb and flow. So it feels
like that's the thing that you guys can build together,
whereas a lot of people don't have that ebb and flow.
It's a more kind of consistent, steady stream of energy.

Speaker 2 (01:13:13):
Well, this has been so insightful. Again, again, Erin, thank
you so much. This is I'm really excited for your
book because I can't wait to get it and actually
dive in and read Jamilaz read my daughter, Well, I
guess my.

Speaker 4 (01:13:23):
Daughter's me my boyfriend.

Speaker 2 (01:13:26):
Find out what my boyfriend is so that I can
be better, And Yeah, I just think that this is such,
this is such important, important work and important perspective to
just add to your toolkit. You just like add these
little things to your toolbox of ways that you can
support yourself and the people that you love. And then
also like in your business and build your business and
your team, like when you're working with teams and understanding

(01:13:48):
why two team members on your team are not getting
along and how to better support them. Like, there's so much,
there's so much here that really can help with that.
So thank you for the work that you do, and
thank you for coming back on our show. Aerin Make
sure you guys get Aaron's book, How do You Choose
a Human Design Guide to What's best for You at work,

(01:14:09):
in love, and in life. It comes out on May thirteenth.
Is there anything where where else can people find you?

Speaker 5 (01:14:16):
Well, if you guys want to get the guides that
we've been talking about, the blueprint that's on human design
blueprint dot com. We still have the discount code GMBC
And I'm on Instagram at Aaron Clara Jones and at
human Design Blueprint.

Speaker 6 (01:14:30):
And also congratulations on your babies and on your success
and on your new book. I'm really proud of you,
you know, as a woman putting a birthing workout into
the world that's going to live forever is you know,
I know, it's so special and beautiful. And just the
fact that you're helping your community, you're helping us, You're
helping people like recenter themselves and understand how they relate

(01:14:50):
to the world. And I really truly appreciate that. And
I'm you know, I'm inspired by you.

Speaker 5 (01:14:57):
Thank you, guys for saying that. So nice to see
you than thanks for having me.

Speaker 2 (01:15:01):
All right, try well, make sure you go subscribe and
leave a review on this episode if you haven't already,
make sure you follow us at Good Mom's Underscore, Bad Choices,
follow the retreat. At the Good Via Retreat, we have
a beautiful summer retreat with the ladies happening to summer retreats.

(01:15:21):
We always do their our annual summer retreats, and we
do have a few more spots up for a couple's
retreat in June. And yeah, take care of yourself, okay,
bye please, Yeah.

Speaker 6 (01:15:33):
I'm living so good. Can't you tell?

Speaker 1 (01:15:35):
I went through a drought that's until I found a
well made mine have been known earth. I used to
be broken tail, now got the Blues Dans and might
Beyonce Jill throat shots with popping this cow. We're in
our voices, Patriarch get catched in the bus to what's bois?

Speaker 6 (01:15:48):
Women put the pee and powers? So what's point? Misty
want me to be good? So I make bad choices.

Speaker 1 (01:15:53):
Bad mom not a bad mom, but a bad mom.
Gitters in on put cannabis in their bath, bomb walk
in in bloss. This is cap and I blew his
cat bolls hot dog. Now I'm immune to the cat
called Herbie and no waisted straight to it like a
dollar sign. Mother, rent the lover when too. It's like
a water sign where you're rent the winter resential will
when the summertime.

Speaker 6 (01:16:12):
I do what doll ain't no one that needs to
run it by

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Hosts And Creators

Erica Dickerson

Jamilah Mapp

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}How Do You Choose? Feat. Erin Claire Jones