February 4, 2020 • 46 mins
Eric and Roselyn share their deeply personal story with IVF to pregnancy to birth
The emotional ups and downs in the journey.
Eric and Roselyn reveal how each were impacted in different ways and how they found joy in the challenging journey.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
This is, he said ajo with Eric Winter and Rosalind
Fantev almost passes. How are you, yeah, I answered correctly, Ben.
How was your weekend, Eric Winter? Well, it was interesting
(00:22):
because we had a very um, unusual or new sort
of date night with some friends that was maybe food
is the language of love for everybody, just might be food.
Well last week it was music week before with sex,
So yeah, there's summis food changing. If you just had dancing,
(00:43):
food and sex, think everybody be happy. Yeah, you'd have
your cardio, you know, full stomach right, yeah, and then
you're bam bang at the end and really romantic. Um. Yeah,
so why did we do? We went to something which
I want to do again with with with more friends
but um a cooking class slash dinner date with three
(01:10):
other couples. We all were assigned dishes that we had
selected what the overall dinner would be ahead of time,
and then when we got there, got a little briefing
and partnered up very you know, we weren't together, which
is if that's a good thing, it was great, we
have argued. Yeah, because I baked on Sunday as well,
randomly like leading into more cooking. I baked the day after,
and you were like, heart on me the entire time,
(01:33):
so long to you could do something very firston you
can't even bake heavy. Let's do some coupcakes on Sunday,
this something with the family and spent some family time.
And she was so excited, even ding all day long. Okay, okay, okay,
all day long. He wanted cupcakes. So then I go
to the supermarket to buy the ingredients and I said,
you know, let's try to do something healthy. And Eric
(01:53):
pulls a recipe for this banana It was like a
peanut butter cupcake, but it was healthy boar in the
history of cacakes. It took the It took him like
maybe three hours. And the cupcase like a banana bread
hybrid dry carton board. Oh my god, God bless settle Down.
(02:16):
I made some great paleo brownies that we did. That
was that was amazing. And then I made these really
weird ass banana bread cupcake cardboard things. Yeah, but the
whole time, like you're judging me and you're not doing
not doing anything. You're like, don't if you want to help.
I thought this was your idea, and I ended up
doing it all. You love baking it. That's why. Alright,
(02:37):
baking on our date, our dinner date with everybody. I got,
oddly enough dropped into the apricot cobbler. No, not cobbler tart.
So I had to make an apricot tart, which was amazing,
pretty good. My mashed potatoes were green, peeled potatoes, and
then I put them and then you mash them. No,
and I add a mascar mac mascarpone, mascarpone and shies
(02:57):
and salt and bottle. My mash potatoes were amazing. I'm
not a mashed potato guy, but they were good. They
were good. This is how different we are. So everybody
that knows me knows that mashed potatoes are my favorite food.
For forty six years, I can eat mashed potatoes every
single time. I used to gag on them as a child,
no joke, dry heat, dry heave. I can eat them now.
(03:20):
But they got to be super buttery or like lobster like,
and I'll just pick the lobster out. By god, I
hate mashed potatoes. But it was fun. We all got
to like it, became a little competitive. It was kind
of like a cooking show. Highly recommended. That's a good
day night for guys. Um never kitchen on Tramon Oaks
and you go there and they have like a staff
(03:42):
of three or four people, and there's like about professional
chef and you basically cook with them and bring your
own wine, bring your own drinks, whatever, you get a
little drunk, whatever happened, cocktail and just enjoy the night.
And then everybody had chicken disgusting and I ended up
having a salmon, and then everybody wanted my seven. Yeah
it was good. So that was fun. And then we
baked on Sunday again. What I baked on Sunday more cardboard,
(04:05):
cardboard bandana bread. Okay, it wasn't great, but we had
no other recipe. He told me to find something. I
found it. That's what happens to just google healthy cup gigs.
It wasn't. It wasn't a good move. Um, And then
yeah it was. It was. It was a fun kind
of family relaxing weekend. Was it was. Um. So we
were reading through emails and then we got this email
(04:30):
from a listener saying, please Rosalie and Eric do a
podcast on IVF. I would love to hear more stories
about this trying, trying time and how you can get
through it. I know it is a touchy and difficult situation,
but it would be truly helpful for everyone going through
fertility issues. So we debated. We've been open about our
fertility problems and the many IVS we've done, but we
(04:54):
were like, should we do a podcast about IVF. It's
such a heavy topic, and then we decided, you know what,
it might be very helpful. Many many, many, many women
are going through many couples are going through it. Yeah,
I'm playing on board it like I'm I'm a frustrated doctor.
So for me, that whole process other than you know,
you never know what the outcome is gonna be if
you're actually gonna have a child. But people don't like
to talk about, oh I couldn't get pregnant naturally and
(05:15):
what's wrong with me? And is it a problem with
the male the female? I don't know. Anytime science can
be involved with helping families in any way, I'm all
for it. I love sharing the story, talking about it,
very open about it. Both our kids are financially in
the red. Oh, my god, the expensive history of children. Yeah,
no allowance for a long time. My god, Listen, you
(05:36):
always knew you wanted to have kids. I've always yeah, no,
I always knew i'd be a dad or you know,
whether it was you know, I always thought naturally would happen,
but UH end up being a bit more challenging. You
spend your whole life, well that's not your whole life
once you're uh. Sexual activity starts as a young adult.
(05:57):
You spend your whole time just trying not to get
someone pregnant, like, Okay, don't get anybody, I don't needy kids,
I'm too young. Then all of a sudden, you meet
the right person you want to have children, and you
just can't have kids. He is the most frustrating, and
you never think that's gonna happen. You're like, just it
should be easy. We started um at thirty five. When
(06:19):
I was thirty five, you were, what thirty two. We
started trying because I thought at thirty five I was ready.
I I you know what motherhood from me was like.
I come from a big family. I have three brothers
were four total. But it wasn't like, oh my god,
I want to have kids. I'm gonna have a lot
of kids. To me. When I moved to the States,
it was all about work. Work on my career, and
then I met Eric and I was in a wonderful
(06:41):
relationship and we got married, and then three years into it,
we're like, you know what, let's um, let's start. Did
you always know you want to have kids? Like you
always knew a d percent? I didn't know it was
going to be fine whatever, life, whatever, direct but exactly
I was fine with or without, I guess. And then
when we met you, I wanted kids like it was
mandatory from and then and it's it's weird because I
(07:03):
love children, and even one of my foundations in Puerto
Rico I do with a lot of children. But to
me it was kind of like, well, if it happens, happens.
Then I meet Eric. And then at thirty five, I realize,
you know what, if I want to have kids, I'm
abot to do this fast because I'm already thirty five
years old and i have a condition called endometriosis, which
we can do all different podcasts um regarding endo, which
(07:25):
has basically ruled my life and it is the most
painful and just bad existence mexically when you have it. Anyways,
um so I knew, you know what, I'm thirty five,
I have endo. I need to to take this seriously.
And we tried for three years. What you think going
into it is going to be incredible because all your
(07:46):
wife is like, hey, come on, it's time, come on,
it's time. Hey, let's go, and you're like, all right,
let's have a kid, no problem. They got to the
point that I was like, I need you now, and
he's like, good, I'm going, yeah, says we've done it
four times. I going, I don't care, do what I get.
So it wasn't fun. And my legs, I know it
was a job on. My legs are all. We tried
(08:07):
every single trick, and I'm going, how is it possible
I'm super healthy? This was what's crazy to me. I
am such I believe I'm such a healthy person. I've
taken I've taken incredible care of my body and don't
drink and smoke out of the drugs. I'm like, I'm
the perfect candidate to get pregnant easily. My mom had
four children, no problems. And then you start and it
(08:27):
doesn't happen, and it's so brutal as a woman that
you should go I don't understand. I've done everything right,
and they say you should give it a good year plus,
I think before you even consider other options. And I
think we gave it a solid three years, gave it
a full three because by the time you had Isabella,
no I had to to two years. Roughly. We did
it and finally said, okay, this is not happening. So
(08:49):
then we went to do all these checkups, and my
fertility was always my problem was always in fertility, not
determined like nobody could because my end door was behind
my uterus, so my my my following tubes were clean
and my my uterus was clean, so it was kind
of like a like a question mark. And then we said, okay,
so let's not go crazy, and let's start with artificial insemination,
(09:12):
which is a much cheaper and an easier process, which
is um when you're ovulating, your your husband or your
facilitated goes to the place they go. He goes into
a little room, they put some porn. He basically comes out,
then they clean it, they spin it, and then they
get the best sperm worst part about the world, and
(09:36):
then there's like a lobby right outside. You're like, oh,
this is cool, and he's going to go and masturbate himself.
It's really crazy, and then your brain hoping that police,
God let them be the best sperm positible, beautiful, healthy, smart,
athletic children. And then they spin it and then they
put it inside this like it's like an injection, right,
and they a Turkey based and then they go in
(09:57):
injected on your little cherry and then the things and
then they take a left or they take a right,
depending on where the egg is waiting. Right. So we
did many of those, yeah, almost seven, I guess almost seven,
and it didn't work. And then they found a polyp
in semi uterus or maybe that was the problem anyway,
(10:17):
So after doing so many of them, we decided, why
don't We're just going to have to do the heavy one,
which is IVF. And it's pretty concile, I mean in
and of itself, aside from how brutal it is on
the woman with everything hormonally, I mean, it's for a
lot of people out there. It is very expensive, you know,
(10:39):
it's not depending depending on the state, but here in
California is almost twenty grand. Yeah. IVF is an insurance,
doesn't yeah nothing, No artificial examination is nine dreds a thousand.
IVF could be up to depending on the cocktail, meaning
the combination of hormones they give you, because everybody is different,
(11:00):
you know, but it's different. So it's very expensive and
the insurance doesn't cover it. And if it takes, beautiful.
If it doesn't take, you lost the money and it's crazy.
Your body is bruised and your hormones are all over
the place, and you have to have a very solid
relationship because we know of couples that don't survive the process.
Because the women we go coogle, we go crazy. It is,
(11:21):
you know, not to always make light of everything, but
we try to live our lives, our relationship making light
of things. But it's like you're the incredible Hulk. You know,
you're shooting hormones into your body nothing. You can't predict
anything from day to day, how you're gonna feel. You
can't control it no matter how much I try to
help you know, your hormones go hey wire. I know
(11:44):
a lot of people would you know. It's an unspoken
sort of thing, and it's a tough balance because obviously
it's two people going through I V have one of them,
the woman going through a more severe side of it
because of all the injections and the hormones. But the
flip side of that is is definitely a brutal process
on the mail as well. Not physically as brutally brutal,
(12:05):
but mentally very challenging because you want to be as
supportive as you can, but sometimes you're completely bugging. You
smell bucks me, You're you're speaking voice books, You're pushed
away from trying to help. It's very challenging time for me.
That was my life for about five years. Yeah, it was.
(12:30):
Was that crazy? I mean, well, you start at a
certain level already appreciate there's a heightened state in your
personality as it is, and you're just you know, sprinkle
a little that on top of it. Yeah, that's I
won't say crazy. Two great kids out of it. Mentally altered.
(12:53):
So there's a lot of injections involved. Stomach in your
little I had to give all. I remember the first
time I did it. Want to do it. So Eric
had the responsibility of injective. Remember the first time with Sabella.
I was filming a pilot UH in New York and
you had to do the injections on your own and
I will call him videos. I remember being on FaceTime
(13:17):
in between shooting and trying to walk you because you
have to. Sometimes the cotailrmones you have to mix them
and it's this little powder on this little liquid and
you have to be very specific. And I'm like, I
have never injected myself with anything. You know. The whole time,
I'm just getting yelled at and chewed out because I'm
not there. But then I gotta work. Oh so much.
He was working. It's like I wanted him to work,
but I was like, how dare you? I'm here by myself.
(13:39):
I injected myself. It was awful, but you know what
the good thing is. First IVF boom it took was
born and we're like, this is so easy, which we
actually told her today for the first she actually there
was two two embryos took one. Both had heartbeats. I
put three eggs just so you know, and one did
(14:00):
not make it. And that was an interesting thing to
go through. It It hit you very hard. For me,
I've always been in the mindset if it wasn't if
something doesn't happen, it's not meant to happen. And it
was kind of like, you know, that was your body,
and that was God saying that this one wasn't gonna
make this was going to be a problem. But that
was very difficult for you because you go through all
that and boom we had twins and then one heart
(14:22):
beat just you know, drifted away. So we told her
for the first time, and you know how it happened
last night. Funny enough, she came. She came to me saying,
one of her classmates said, you know what, mom, so
and so told me that she was a twin and
the other one didn't make it. And I looked at
her and I said, you were a twin. And this
is something that we would We were going to tell
her for quite some time, like I'm a twins, so exciting.
(14:45):
So I can guarantee you she's at school today telling
her everybody was because that's Abella. There was two of us,
and then I am the one that made it. I
was like, oh, no, I know it was. I hope
that doesn't affect her like in a weird way. No,
she appreciates the understanding I think of it. So the
first one was great with Dr Mars and then we're like,
(15:07):
oh my god, this is fantastic, and out of wall
I had like thirteen embryos, and then they keep dying
on you. That's a thing that you get. You inject
yourself and you produce this amount of eggs and then
they fertilize them, and a lot of them don't make it.
So you can be producing twenty eggs and they put
six and then we have six that we had like
(15:29):
six that were good exactly. We put three. No, we
put three, and then we saved um, we saved the
other three, but then only one ended up being good exactly.
And then like two years later, I was doing devious maze,
I'll never forget. We said, you know what, we have
one available that is froze. Let's just put that in.
So we did that, and I was a positive that
is going to take granted, And that's like a mini
(15:50):
version of an IVF. That one didn't have injections. That
was spilled, but it was spills, but you're doing a
lot of progester on a lot of estrogens. So we
put it in and we're like, oh my, I'm gonna
have another baby. Oh my god, I'm so excited. It's
negative nothing. It didn't even attach. And I was devastated.
And then we did it a third time, a full
(16:11):
in betro full in nothing that didn't happen. So that
now that's to one out of three that took switch doctors.
I remember that I was I was working on de views.
I was in Atlanta and my doctor was in Los Angeles.
So I keept flying, but flying back and forth. And
then when the third one didn't take, the doctor said,
you need to stop working. It's insanity, this back and forth.
(16:34):
When you have a break you you see, this is
a tough thing. And we were getting a lot of
a lot of disagreements about this because you want to
live your life. But stress, you know, they have like
retreat through people that are trying, that are struggling to
get pregnant, like go away, clear your mind. Stress can
be one of the biggest causes of not getting pregnant
naturally or with IVV. And you would always put yourself under,
(16:55):
you know, tons of stress, assuming you could handle it. Listened,
people Eric that third one I'll never forget. So I
fly to from Atlanta to Los Angeles. I do it.
They put my my embryo. I fly to New York
that night, the same day of the mini surgery, because
I had an appearance that a very well paid appearance.
(17:19):
And this is how ambition and craziness because I should
have just chill, and I decided, no, I have to
go to New York. And I am at this red
carpet for this thing. And you know who was there,
and never forget La La Anthony and Bylon what is
her name? Oh my gonna love her? Just Puerto Rican,
beautiful girl. She's a host of the real Adrian Bylon.
(17:45):
Anyway she is, She's beautiful and super sweet. And we're
there and I'm doing the red carpet thinking what am
I doing here? I'm crumpy, I'm bloated. I just did
an IVF. I have four almost five inch heels. I
should be in bed. What am I doing? And that
night I knew it's not going to take. Ill know,
(18:06):
and I see still to this day, I see the
um the pictures of direct carpet and I look at
them and I go, oh my god, why didn't do that?
But anyways, it wasn't meant to be. Then we changed
doctors and we went to doctor Wang, and I did
one more didn't take. Then I didn't another way, got
(18:26):
introduced to what was called the mini IVF, and then
a mini they take different, different different what happens is
my my cocktail was so aggressive to to be able
to create and develop a lot of eggs. But I
will get fifteen eggs. But then when they will do
the blood test the day before the day of the
retrieval to remove the eggs, my hormones were completely whacked.
(18:50):
And an indication of that is the eggs are not viable.
You can remove them and just take a risk and
put them in anyway to see what happens. But they said,
you know what, most likely the eggs are no good,
So don't waste your time. After you've been injecting for
a month and you're bruised and you're like a walking
time bomb. And then finally, so so what are we
doing wrong? Guys? Why am I? Why is this not
wh Why am I ovulating when I'm supposed to be ovulating?
(19:12):
And they said, you know what, we're going to aggressive.
Let's just do mini iv s. And I did three
of those. The first one I got one egg, second
one two eggs, third one one egg and then I
was like, the eggs together now because they freeze them
and then you do it all over again. I'll never forget.
They said at that point, with Dylan. They said, for
someone at your age with all this going on, it
was like up ten chance of even getting pregnant, and
(19:37):
I think it was like fifteen percent chance, and then
it was maybe eight percent chance you could have twins,
which I was freaking out because I put four first time.
I knew it was going to be the last time
that I was going to attempt the IVF because it's
been seven already times, and I was like, I'm done.
I'm like too old. I was forty four at the time,
and I'm like, I can't do this anymore. I I
want my life back. I'm obsessing over this. I'm sick
(20:00):
to my stomach and my body is taking a beating,
my marriage is taking a beating. So this is the
last time I'm doing it. And I and I knew
if it was a boy, I wanted him to be
named Gabriel because I made a promise to Gabriel. Ark angel,
that's what you say it. Arriel is the angel that
gave Virgin Mary the news that she was going to
(20:22):
conceive that she was pregnant, she was having a baby,
So they call him the Angel of Baby. So if
you want to have a baby, you prayed to so
I knew. I made a promise. If I have a boy,
he's going to have his name. And of course party
pooper here um said, um, I don't like yet. No,
that's for all the get all the Gabriels out there
(20:43):
who are listening to the podcast. I love your name.
It wasn't that, it just wasn't my And then she
but she's always been whacked with name. I mean with Sabella.
She was going to be Sabella was Hannah Aluna. At
one point of what the heck name is? Hanna Emily
was in the run and that was until the end.
We decided this is what said. I had a dream,
then you had Pablo Joe Swet. I had a dream,
(21:05):
Pablo jou my child, my boy. I had a dream.
No one's ample. My kid is Pablo Winter. Pablo Jouet
Winter is actually a very distinguished like movie star roster.
The Pablo says that are out there are rock stars,
but it's not going to win one day. I know
your soul is out there because I had a dream
that you were my child. So we finally get pregnant
(21:27):
with Dylan. We're in the hospital. We cannot agree on
before you I'm going to jump ahead because it's very beautiful.
The beautiful. What I'm about to say, it is beautiful.
Say that some of the doctor got you pregnant? What
our kids have like four dads? No, no, what I
was going to say a doctor, I p read a
lot and I will go to the church and played Mary.
(21:48):
I'm going I can't blah blah blah. Anyways, I went
to a botanica somewhere and I got a little stamp
of their changel Gabriel. So when the implantation of the
implantation when the you call it, not retrieval, the putting
them in, putting putting them, I had this stamp of
(22:11):
our Kanja Garbriel. And then they give you a volume
when they when they when they retrieve, you're down, that
is tishat. You're completely sleep and you don't know anything.
When they actually put the embryo on the fertilized um,
it's not called mber not kind of like they call
it something else. When it goes in, they give you
like like a volume, so you kind of like you
(22:33):
kind of like there but not there. And I'll never forget.
I had the stamp of our Kenya Garriel with me
in my hand under my my thigh, and the doctor said,
I just want you to know, and this is what
I'm pulling about to fall asleep. He goes, I want
you to know. Ros it's only ten to fifteen of
this happening. And I looked at him and I said,
he doesn't know that I have God's favor. I want
(22:54):
I want to cry. And then I don't remember anything
right Eric, And then they put the things and we
get a phone call and the blood count is so
high that she's pregnant that they basically say it's probably twins.
And that's when I about passed freaking out. I mean,
you're blessed you have one. I was super I was like, Okay,
she's pregnant. That's great news. But the number that they
(23:18):
tell you when you're pregnant or not, it's like a
range of I'm gonna make it, make it up, but
it's like six something like that. She was at like
fifteen hundred something with the hormone level saying you're pregnant,
which is a very strong indicator that it's two because
the level is so high. Oh that was a long
afternoon for me. Please, I could not wait to get
(23:40):
in there and I was like, is making this very sad?
I'm so excited and sleep because it was twins. Oh,
I was stressed out. And then I go to my
first and then we get there and he's looking. He's like, no,
it's just one. You're like you're lying, you're telling the
doctor there's two, and I'm like, they're not too. He
had says there's one, there's one. Eric he was worried
because he was expecting to find two sacks of two.
(24:01):
And then he said and then he went to my
following tips, thinking, I hope it's not on topic pregnancy,
which is one travel to my tubes and that's very
dangerous for the baby, for the month, for everybody. So
I'm like, oh please god, no, no, no, no, no, no,
and no it was it was just one. And I said,
but why why are yeah? Why am I my levels
so high? And he said, you have a very strong
um child and I was like, oh my god, this
(24:24):
is so beautiful. So then um we go to the hospital.
I delivered this child and I want him to be
able to at something and Eric is like, it's not
gonna the middle name is gonna be it's a promise.
So I'm not leaving the hospital on until you signed
the birth certificate and gabriel is written someone basically I
don't care, means Eric. She wanted Gabrielle, she wanted all
(24:46):
these things. We could not agree on her name to
save our lives. Like nothing, I've never agreed with her
name choices. For the most part. We did get good
with Sabella finally, but we're sitting there and the kid
has no name. It just says no name Winter for
the whole time we're in the hospital, said kept calling
him no name, baby. Well, you should really make a decision,
And I'm like, well, how long do I have? Can
I just do this next week? And we don't know yet.
(25:06):
We don't we can't decide a name. Well, it's really
difficult if you wait till you get out of the hospital,
because then you gotta go back to the paperwork and
it's not as smooth. And I was like, oh my gosh,
Like I said, you guys have a name book like
at the hospital. So I just started going through every
letter in the alphabet looking through names, and I stumbled
upon Dylan and Dylan Winter, Dylan Gabrielle. When Dylan Gabriel
(25:28):
I'm like, I like this. I like this. So I
had to spin it with her and do this whole
pitch about how Dylan's name because we were big on name,
like the meaning of the name for Sabella. Her meaning was,
which we didn't know when we found the name, but
her meaning was God's promise and we're like, oh my God,
that's great, definitely going Sabella. And then when Dylan came up,
it said he was like God of the sea, and
(25:50):
it was all this stuff relating to the ocean. And
I kept saying, ros, you're from Porto Rico. It's an
island surrounded by the ocean. And I didn't remember for anything.
And I was like, okay, that's fine. You threw a
surfing you know, baby shower. You don't even surf. Why
do you have surfboards that a bathing shower is all
about the ocean? And I'm like, this is the name.
(26:10):
And so we ended up going down between Sebastian and
Uh and Dylan, and then I said, all right, rock
paper scissors, No, no, we did that, and then but
then I texted, no, this is funny. So it was
it's a Sebastian Garbrielo Winter or Delan gaba Winter right,
So I text I'm still medicated. I'm like dizzy, right,
And I take my friend Runnie and I goes running Sebastian,
(26:32):
Sebastian Gabriel Winter or l Winter and she goes, well,
what does he look like? Because Sebastian is more like,
he needs to look like dark, olive skin Italiano type
of guy. That's a Sebastian. If it's wide, then I
think it's Dylan. And I'm like, here's a deal, white blood,
like I'm going there. And then it was like Ross
(26:54):
didn't Gabriel Delanel Gabriel, Well, I am calling him only
person and you correct people, which is oddling Gabriel it's
Gabrielle and they don't say it like that. So anyways,
that's our So for the listeners that went really long,
I'm so sorry. I hope that was not boring, Um,
but that is our journey. I hope that explains the IVF.
(27:27):
You know what's crazy, Eric, Um, It's so common nowadays,
and I think women and couples in general are much
more open to sharing their IVF stories. And you know
what I just learned. I had and I had no
idea that the Obama's went through. I had no idea.
Both kids not crazy, um crazy Tagan and John Legend
(27:49):
also UM, and she says the same thing that you
said at the very beginning, which is you you avoid
your whole life to get pregnant, and then when you're ready,
it doesn't happen. And it is. It is mind boggling.
It's mind boggling. And we have here some look just
to wrap it up. Also, I mean, please email us again,
UM if you have more thoughts or comments, because we
will we will pick up on all of this another
(28:10):
episode for sure. UM. We should sept It would be
great to bring an expert. And it's I think it's
a really interesting topic for a lot of people to
talk through and be open to. But you know, I think, yeah,
just there any advice that you might have for women
that are considering this process rouser or or in the
middle of it. UM, I think listen. I think that
(28:33):
the experience and the process is you have to be
ready financially, mentally, emotionally. UM. It's not easy because once
you you you mess with the chemistry of your body.
You know the amount of hormones that you have to
um put into your body. It's it's not easy, it's
not fun. Um, you don't feel like yourself, and and
(28:55):
and and the saddest part is knowing that there's no
guarantee this might work, this might not work. Those ten
days of waiting to get the result are brutal. I
remember I was like like a zombie every every single
time that seven times I did it, I was, I was.
I was a zombie, like waiting for the phone call,
waiting for that blood result. Um. So you have to
be ready. You have to be ready and and and
(29:16):
do a lot of praying, a lot of meditation, and
and then gold Fred, I think, I think motherhood is
the most incredible experience in the world. I know. I
don't know of women that they don't feel like they
need to be moms and that and I respect that,
you know, but if you are blessed enough to go
through the experience, and if you don't get pregnant naturally,
(29:36):
I believe it's a beautiful thing that that science and
human beings and God has given us this incredible mind
to be able to help people. Yeah, that's always a debate,
Like I hear some people say, well, but you know,
it wasn't what God intended, because God didn't make it happen,
you know, it happened through science. And I'm I'm always
a big believer in well, but God gave human disability
ability through science and come up with salute sations to help,
(30:01):
you know, people, And I think that's something that's perspective
and I think you can be open to it, even
if you think, oh, my religion doesn't allow it, or
I'm not you know, I think I wouldn't shut anything
out through so many emotions. I remember when when they
don't take, and you go through all this burden, you know,
it doesn't take, and you and you start thinking about
all the women in the world that get pregnant that
(30:21):
they don't even want to have kids, and there and
some of them are so responsible, you know, and you go,
I don't understand the world. I don't understand I don't
understand creation, the ones I really wanted that that that
will be amazing mothers that have the capability of giving
a child a beautiful life. It becomes so difficult. And
then you have girls that it's just a fluke, you
(30:42):
know me, and the first time boom it happens, they
don't even want to be moms and they're completely responsible
and you just go why it's like, I don't I
don't understand the world if it's so sad. But if
you're ready and you want to have and you want
to be a mom, if you have the financial means,
you know, you know what, So beautiful, guys, I am.
We have all that struggle for many many many years
and um, she didn't work. And he's an actor and
(31:06):
his career, he's very talented, his career was up and down.
So it's very expensive and because of their age, they
wanted to do this. So they emailed a lot of
friends and saying, we have this dream and this desire,
we want to be parents and we can't afford it.
So will mean the world to us if if you
guys can help in any way. And you know what,
(31:27):
friends came through and they paid for that in virtual
and they have a beautiful boy. Is that beautiful. It's
a beautiful story. So some other questions that we you know,
just in regards to IVF, was I too old for
I V? People think I did one of thirty eight,
one of forty four. Usually when you do it, it
comes down to this, is this is an interesting thing? That.
I remember speaking to the doctors because you know, I
(31:48):
love all this. When did they stop? When did they tell?
You know, it's all about your embryos, right, so your
uterus is fine. So if you had frozen your eggs,
you know, back in your twenties, or if you had
you know, had your eggs frozen back and even in
your thirties, you could be in your fifties and use
those same eggs. Now. One thing that's interesting I remember
talking to the doctors about is this. You know, science
is such a male driven industry and a lot of
(32:11):
times getting pregnant or not getting pregnant was always the
blame was always pointed towards the woman, that it was
a female problem. And as science has gone on and
it's you know, becoming more with no gender as far
as the knowledge goes, they're realizing, look, men also, even
though we were you produce semen constantly. The older mail
(32:33):
is also can cause fertility issues when it comes to
getting pregnant or even defects because the batch of sperm
you're producing at an older age isn't going to be
as as the quality of the batch is not going
to be as good as as it was as a
younger age. This is what the infertility doctor was telling me,
and I found that fascinating. That always the girls always check,
(32:53):
you know, check the willie of your husband or your partner.
Is very possible that it's their problem, so that you know, look,
I think one thing I know about it doesn't matter.
Let's say the in future part. Just being an older
parent is tough. There's one. It's a reason that people
have kids at a young age because you start going, wow,
I'm in my forties and I got two kids, and
(33:13):
you get beat up, you know, you get you're tired.
You come home and they want to play, and they
have this energizer bunny energy and they don't want to stop.
And you're like, why am I so exhausted? Why can't
I just keep up with you? But that's I think
having kids at any age over. You know, in the forties,
you guys want to do something crazy. You wanna do
something crazy. It's a true story. I don't think I'm
crazy or mystical or magical, or I believe in fool
(33:34):
food stuff. But if they've been listening to the podcast,
you just checked off everything that they probably think you are, Well,
this is a true story. What I'm about to say.
So last week when we had um Jenna and you know,
she's very mystical, and we talked about fin Chewi how
do you say chew chew a character and star. So
(33:56):
this finial week guy that we had our home before,
it's about la. We had him three times already, but
the first time we had him. He's Eric's dad. Um
Wayne is engaged. It's basically has a life partner for
many many years. And she's Chinese. So she said, you know,
I have a wonderful and chewy person. And we hadn't
come to our house to just to check the energy
(34:20):
and move things around, and he told us you're gonna
have a baby. By then, we were not even trying
or we were about to start doing the idea if
we didn't, we kept quiet, We didn't say anything, and
he spoke beautifully and he didn't he didn't know the sex,
but he did say, um, it's gonna be a great
communicator and he's going to be more famous than you guys.
And I was like, okay, that sounds interesting, but because
(34:41):
we were not pregnant, I was like whatever. Anyways, fast
forward two, we have a baby. We have Sabella. Maybe
Sabella is now eight months. He comes back to the
house because we wanted to do some cleansing again. He
meets Sabella and then he starts speaking Chinese with Grace
and it gets kind of like heavy, and I like uncomfortable,
and I'm looking at Eric and I'm looking at and
(35:03):
his dad, and I'm going, what are the saying? So
I said, what's going on? What's going on? And I
see Grace's face kind of like uncomfortable on going what what? What?
What happened? What is he saying? Because I'm immediately thinking
he's saying something bad about Sabella. What's going on? And
then she says, no, nothing, nothing, I'm gonna please tell me,
And she goes, well, we've never told you, but the
first time that he came that he told you guys
(35:24):
were going to have a baby. When we left in
the car, he said to us that we were never
going to have kids naturally because we were not compatible
to have children naturally. And what a wonderful thing that
we use science. And he got to meet Sabella and
I started bawling because I'm going, oh my god, he knew,
(35:47):
you know, so he understands the journey. He knew, he
said before there was a he said he knew before,
and then we had to do use IVF all over again.
So yeah, that's the story, not crazy. What's his name?
Uh well, I asked my dad. He just came to
the house. That's what he does. I know that's pinning.
(36:09):
He came to the house again, um the end of
the year two thousand nineteen, and he did the charts
and were happy about that. I was very happy. I
loved the reading the first time because it was all
about you having success. And then it came to this time,
nonse when I heard something awesome. He told Eric that
I was his lucky Charming, but basically that he couldn't
(36:30):
take a step in life without maybe next to him
because I would bring him good luck and good fortune
and a good life. He said, even when you go
to auditions, she should go with you over Well, I'm
gonna go to go that far, but it was beautiful.
I hope you feel that way totally. Anyways, all right,
we take a break, Ye take a break, all right.
(37:00):
We want to hear about you and your thoughts and
your questions. I know this topic is fascinating. Like I
said before, it will be awesome to bring an actual
fertility doctor and another couple to tell their stories. Is
an important topic. Many women are going through this, so
I think it's valuable and so please email at he
said agr D whole podcast. That's not an email, that's
(37:20):
an actual handle on Instagram. So d M or the
email Eric and Ross at I Heart radio dot com.
I have a question for using your we make beautiful
kids healthy kids? Would you go and try it for
another one? What happens if you have naturally happens? We
make sure that's not gonna happen. How you don't use
(37:44):
I don't use protection skill skill? Um no, not going
to know. Listen. I I you know, being a father's
my life. I love it. But I told you before
I was good with one. I um you know, the
older we get. I always had an issue with just
health of the baby and the embryos and making sure
(38:05):
there was no problems because we went through a lot.
We didn't agree on all that because I I am
fine again with genetic testing and doing all those things.
But then if you do genetic testing, there's also a
risk that you can jeopardize the integrity of the EMBAM
explain what that means because people let me explain. So
you're gonna explain it better than me, for sure. So
you have your embryos, and then if you want to
(38:27):
find out the sex, because this is I'm going I'm
gonna get in there. This is how advanced science is nowadays.
You can know exactly what you put it in. So
it is it's a boy, is it a girl? You
know everything right, So it's called genetic testing, and a
lot of times they do it for health reasons. So
they choose the chromosome for health reasons. Yes, they check
(38:47):
the chromosomes, they check the DNA, they check everything to
make sure that it's a viable embryo. That is a
viable everything that they baby is healthy. So well what
happens um when they poke it, when they put that
little needle bing right, can compromise the embryos, they can
kill it. So with Sabella, I had six available, I
(39:09):
put three, and still I was not comfortable because I
didn't produce, so I didn't have twenty embryos, thirty ambrios
like a lot of women have the blessing of having
I was like, I don't want to compromise that. The egg,
so it is what it is. Whatever, even if I
got an alien, you can also wait and do a
standard CVS or an AMBNIO any of that you but
(39:29):
you can do those later in pregnancy. But you again
can still compromise commis child in there, but a lot
of people do with the percentages are low. So it
was a big negotiation between me and Eric because he
wanted to do it. Because if I was thirty eight,
blood work back and this is before the harmony test existed,
which is now out um. But with Sabella was that
they didn't have the harmony test with you. You had
(39:52):
your blood work done and a certain protein level came
back a little off with Sabella, and because it was off,
I was freaking out and I said, let's do a CVS,
Let's do an amnual either one, let's do one. I
want to make sure the baby's okay. And you didn't
want to do it. And that was a big, big
argument and I ended up letting that go and blood
(40:13):
Thank god we had a very healthy child. I call
my brother he's a doctor, and said, Peter, this is
what's happening. I mean tears going. Eric rather be crazy
because he wants me to do this, but again, nobody,
nobody knows the outcome, I mean of what could happen.
But we trusted in it and everything was fine at
the end of the day. That was always a big
factor to me and you and I don't fully agree
on the testing process. Now with Dylan, they have a
(40:35):
new thing called the Harmony test. Is just a straight
up blood test and that gives you a lot of
stuff upfront, which is really a relief overall early on
you can get this. To be honest, the main reason
why why you wouldn't have another health Health has always
been one thing because I just you know, having a
healthy child is has always been something that sits in
(40:55):
my head right. But at the end of the day,
I again, I was an only child. I was happy
having one. Then we had too. I'm super happy having to.
I don't feel like I need anymore and I'm at
a good place and I think our family is at
a good place. Did you ever think about adopting, world, Huh?
Did you ever think about adopting? We talked about it.
I'm totally I'm totally up for for adoption. I think
(41:17):
it's a beautiful thing. We have a lot of friends
that have done adoption, and their homes have been filled
with amazing children. So adoption has always been something we've
talked about and thought about in our in our journey.
And I think it's I think when families do that,
it's incredible. Um, but you wouldn't do it now. I
just don't think we're in a place where we where
we at least where I want more kids. I'm happy
(41:37):
with two. You already maybe you already got another dog
of the house that you forced upon us. I mean,
what are you trying to do to me here? I
got no opinions in the whole house. I always thought
I was going to adopted the kid. Well, right now,
you've got a dog that is sitting in limbo. No
what Archie is sitting in limbo? Limbo, he's actually loving life.
He's sitting in the ground, but he went from from
from He's in his dog bed. But we don't know
(41:59):
what happening with Archie. And you see the pictures I
posted this weekend guys with Eric an Archie love affair.
It's like pressure, pure pressure. Thank you. But you know
what I did something very beautiful that's not I thank
to you and I said thank you so much for
your patience and your love, and and for allowing Archie
the possibility of a beautiful life. It's all because of you.
(42:21):
I love you so much. M M I did I know.
I appreciate it you for real, like I will never forget.
You will see what the outcome of Archie in our household.
We'll be resolved soon. He's a wonderful dog. That's what
I'm saying. You can hear up all about peer pressure,
(42:43):
trying to make me happ like pushy, pushy person. You're
trying to force dogs on me, kidding kids on me
in a game. A year and a half, Rosan and
Sanchez Eric Winter adopted a kid, one from the point
they one from Puerto Rico, just like the dogs. If
the rest beautique beautiful. You really would take on another
(43:04):
kid right now? You really would? No, I'm thinking pregnancy
or like adopting. No, either way, just starting over with
another child. I'll do it. Everything is so easy, I'll
do it, do it. I just figured as we go,
I don't do this, I'm fine. Can you take care
(43:24):
of this? And you also want taking care of that thules.
I've been taking care of three schedules at that point, yeah,
I'll take another child. My husband will take care of
everything with schedules. I'll take Oh my god, oh my god.
I think Dylan will pass out. And Sabella would love it.
Bella's begging for a little girl, for a baby girl.
Every single day. She wants to have a little sister.
(43:44):
What about surrogacy, I'm I'm all. I'm up for all
that stuff for families that are trying to have children.
I got nothing against any of it. I just don't
I'm not looking to find a surrogate. I'm good. You're good.
I know you're good. I know you're good. We're good.
We're actually very blessed, very blessed. Um. We have really
(44:05):
amazing kids. Thank God. Got a hang out. I think
we should get like a snake or something. Come on,
that's the next thing. I wanted a weird topic change,
but I was just thinking about this after giving away
Honey the turtle. Do you want to get a snake?
I'll set up for a go a rabbit. You don't
want to have an Angora rabbit? Although you know what
(44:26):
your your hair, Lady dina Um the rookie had a
goa and go a rabbit and said they're they're amazing,
but they bite everything, furniture, clothes, they just ruin everything.
And her husband wasn't very pleased. And I'm like, oh
that'd be Eric, So no, A go anyway, So we
(44:47):
covered IVF, we covered live, we covered adoption, We answer questions. Advice.
Don't wait to have a baby past thirty five. I
know it's very common nowadays, ladies. I did it, um,
and I always will have this little voice saying I
wonder if that was part of it, because you know
your body changes, Um, it's textbook. The quality of the
(45:10):
egg changes. So if you can free your eggs, or
if you can try to become a mother before thirty five,
it's much easier. I VF. It's not easy. It's a
beautiful result. If it's positive and your life changes forever
for the better, and you forget everything and every every
tier and every bruise, you forget about it because once
you have that little angel with you, it was all
worth it. But my advice, UM, be very sure of
(45:32):
your decision. Make sure that that you are in a
very solid relationship. If you are in a relationship. UM no,
that it's hard, but it's doable. And listen, I did it.
We didn't regret it. We did it. We just spoke
to our producers. We're looking at him right now and saying,
this doctor thing is going to happen. It's happening one
(45:53):
next episode. We're gonna bring in a doctor to answer
all of the listeners questions, thoughts, everything you need to
know about I VS. Because we covered UM as much
as we could of our experience, what I experienced you.
But if you guys have a specific questions, UM, it's
much better to have an expert. So DM email and
we'll make it. We'll make it awesome. I will answer
(46:13):
all the questions. Eric and Roz at iHeart radio dot com,
let's make this happen and send your stuff in. We're
going to have an amazing guest. I love you all right,
Love you too. Subscribe to he said am v hoo
on iHeart Radio, Apple podcast or anywhere you get your
podcast
This is, he said ajo with Eric Winter and Rosalind
Fantev almost passes. How are you, yeah, I answered correctly, Ben.
How was your weekend, Eric Winter? Well, it was interesting
(00:22):
because we had a very um, unusual or new sort
of date night with some friends that was maybe food
is the language of love for everybody, just might be food.
Well last week it was music week before with sex,
So yeah, there's summis food changing. If you just had dancing,
(00:43):
food and sex, think everybody be happy. Yeah, you'd have
your cardio, you know, full stomach right, yeah, and then
you're bam bang at the end and really romantic. Um. Yeah,
so why did we do? We went to something which
I want to do again with with with more friends
but um a cooking class slash dinner date with three
(01:10):
other couples. We all were assigned dishes that we had
selected what the overall dinner would be ahead of time,
and then when we got there, got a little briefing
and partnered up very you know, we weren't together, which
is if that's a good thing, it was great, we
have argued. Yeah, because I baked on Sunday as well,
randomly like leading into more cooking. I baked the day after,
and you were like, heart on me the entire time,
(01:33):
so long to you could do something very firston you
can't even bake heavy. Let's do some coupcakes on Sunday,
this something with the family and spent some family time.
And she was so excited, even ding all day long. Okay, okay, okay,
all day long. He wanted cupcakes. So then I go
to the supermarket to buy the ingredients and I said,
you know, let's try to do something healthy. And Eric
(01:53):
pulls a recipe for this banana It was like a
peanut butter cupcake, but it was healthy boar in the
history of cacakes. It took the It took him like
maybe three hours. And the cupcase like a banana bread
hybrid dry carton board. Oh my god, God bless settle Down.
(02:16):
I made some great paleo brownies that we did. That
was that was amazing. And then I made these really
weird ass banana bread cupcake cardboard things. Yeah, but the
whole time, like you're judging me and you're not doing
not doing anything. You're like, don't if you want to help.
I thought this was your idea, and I ended up
doing it all. You love baking it. That's why. Alright,
(02:37):
baking on our date, our dinner date with everybody. I got,
oddly enough dropped into the apricot cobbler. No, not cobbler tart.
So I had to make an apricot tart, which was amazing,
pretty good. My mashed potatoes were green, peeled potatoes, and
then I put them and then you mash them. No,
and I add a mascar mac mascarpone, mascarpone and shies
(02:57):
and salt and bottle. My mash potatoes were amazing. I'm
not a mashed potato guy, but they were good. They
were good. This is how different we are. So everybody
that knows me knows that mashed potatoes are my favorite food.
For forty six years, I can eat mashed potatoes every
single time. I used to gag on them as a child,
no joke, dry heat, dry heave. I can eat them now.
(03:20):
But they got to be super buttery or like lobster like,
and I'll just pick the lobster out. By god, I
hate mashed potatoes. But it was fun. We all got
to like it, became a little competitive. It was kind
of like a cooking show. Highly recommended. That's a good
day night for guys. Um never kitchen on Tramon Oaks
and you go there and they have like a staff
(03:42):
of three or four people, and there's like about professional
chef and you basically cook with them and bring your
own wine, bring your own drinks, whatever, you get a
little drunk, whatever happened, cocktail and just enjoy the night.
And then everybody had chicken disgusting and I ended up
having a salmon, and then everybody wanted my seven. Yeah
it was good. So that was fun. And then we
baked on Sunday again. What I baked on Sunday more cardboard,
(04:05):
cardboard bandana bread. Okay, it wasn't great, but we had
no other recipe. He told me to find something. I
found it. That's what happens to just google healthy cup gigs.
It wasn't. It wasn't a good move. Um, And then
yeah it was. It was. It was a fun kind
of family relaxing weekend. Was it was. Um. So we
were reading through emails and then we got this email
(04:30):
from a listener saying, please Rosalie and Eric do a
podcast on IVF. I would love to hear more stories
about this trying, trying time and how you can get
through it. I know it is a touchy and difficult situation,
but it would be truly helpful for everyone going through
fertility issues. So we debated. We've been open about our
fertility problems and the many IVS we've done, but we
(04:54):
were like, should we do a podcast about IVF. It's
such a heavy topic, and then we decided, you know what,
it might be very helpful. Many many, many, many women
are going through many couples are going through it. Yeah,
I'm playing on board it like I'm I'm a frustrated doctor.
So for me, that whole process other than you know,
you never know what the outcome is gonna be if
you're actually gonna have a child. But people don't like
to talk about, oh I couldn't get pregnant naturally and
(05:15):
what's wrong with me? And is it a problem with
the male the female? I don't know. Anytime science can
be involved with helping families in any way, I'm all
for it. I love sharing the story, talking about it,
very open about it. Both our kids are financially in
the red. Oh, my god, the expensive history of children. Yeah,
no allowance for a long time. My god, Listen, you
(05:36):
always knew you wanted to have kids. I've always yeah, no,
I always knew i'd be a dad or you know,
whether it was you know, I always thought naturally would happen,
but UH end up being a bit more challenging. You
spend your whole life, well that's not your whole life
once you're uh. Sexual activity starts as a young adult.
(05:57):
You spend your whole time just trying not to get
someone pregnant, like, Okay, don't get anybody, I don't needy kids,
I'm too young. Then all of a sudden, you meet
the right person you want to have children, and you
just can't have kids. He is the most frustrating, and
you never think that's gonna happen. You're like, just it
should be easy. We started um at thirty five. When
(06:19):
I was thirty five, you were, what thirty two. We
started trying because I thought at thirty five I was ready.
I I you know what motherhood from me was like.
I come from a big family. I have three brothers
were four total. But it wasn't like, oh my god,
I want to have kids. I'm gonna have a lot
of kids. To me. When I moved to the States,
it was all about work. Work on my career, and
then I met Eric and I was in a wonderful
(06:41):
relationship and we got married, and then three years into it,
we're like, you know what, let's um, let's start. Did
you always know you want to have kids? Like you
always knew a d percent? I didn't know it was
going to be fine whatever, life, whatever, direct but exactly
I was fine with or without, I guess. And then
when we met you, I wanted kids like it was
mandatory from and then and it's it's weird because I
(07:03):
love children, and even one of my foundations in Puerto
Rico I do with a lot of children. But to
me it was kind of like, well, if it happens, happens.
Then I meet Eric. And then at thirty five, I realize,
you know what, if I want to have kids, I'm
abot to do this fast because I'm already thirty five
years old and i have a condition called endometriosis, which
we can do all different podcasts um regarding endo, which
(07:25):
has basically ruled my life and it is the most
painful and just bad existence mexically when you have it. Anyways,
um so I knew, you know what, I'm thirty five,
I have endo. I need to to take this seriously.
And we tried for three years. What you think going
into it is going to be incredible because all your
(07:46):
wife is like, hey, come on, it's time, come on,
it's time. Hey, let's go, and you're like, all right,
let's have a kid, no problem. They got to the
point that I was like, I need you now, and
he's like, good, I'm going, yeah, says we've done it
four times. I going, I don't care, do what I get.
So it wasn't fun. And my legs, I know it
was a job on. My legs are all. We tried
(08:07):
every single trick, and I'm going, how is it possible
I'm super healthy? This was what's crazy to me. I
am such I believe I'm such a healthy person. I've
taken I've taken incredible care of my body and don't
drink and smoke out of the drugs. I'm like, I'm
the perfect candidate to get pregnant easily. My mom had
four children, no problems. And then you start and it
(08:27):
doesn't happen, and it's so brutal as a woman that
you should go I don't understand. I've done everything right,
and they say you should give it a good year plus,
I think before you even consider other options. And I
think we gave it a solid three years, gave it
a full three because by the time you had Isabella,
no I had to to two years. Roughly. We did
it and finally said, okay, this is not happening. So
(08:49):
then we went to do all these checkups, and my
fertility was always my problem was always in fertility, not
determined like nobody could because my end door was behind
my uterus, so my my my following tubes were clean
and my my uterus was clean, so it was kind
of like a like a question mark. And then we said, okay,
so let's not go crazy, and let's start with artificial insemination,
(09:12):
which is a much cheaper and an easier process, which
is um when you're ovulating, your your husband or your
facilitated goes to the place they go. He goes into
a little room, they put some porn. He basically comes out,
then they clean it, they spin it, and then they
get the best sperm worst part about the world, and
(09:36):
then there's like a lobby right outside. You're like, oh,
this is cool, and he's going to go and masturbate himself.
It's really crazy, and then your brain hoping that police,
God let them be the best sperm positible, beautiful, healthy, smart,
athletic children. And then they spin it and then they
put it inside this like it's like an injection, right,
and they a Turkey based and then they go in
(09:57):
injected on your little cherry and then the things and
then they take a left or they take a right,
depending on where the egg is waiting. Right. So we
did many of those, yeah, almost seven, I guess almost seven,
and it didn't work. And then they found a polyp
in semi uterus or maybe that was the problem anyway,
(10:17):
So after doing so many of them, we decided, why
don't We're just going to have to do the heavy one,
which is IVF. And it's pretty concile, I mean in
and of itself, aside from how brutal it is on
the woman with everything hormonally, I mean, it's for a
lot of people out there. It is very expensive, you know,
(10:39):
it's not depending depending on the state, but here in
California is almost twenty grand. Yeah. IVF is an insurance,
doesn't yeah nothing, No artificial examination is nine dreds a thousand.
IVF could be up to depending on the cocktail, meaning
the combination of hormones they give you, because everybody is different,
(11:00):
you know, but it's different. So it's very expensive and
the insurance doesn't cover it. And if it takes, beautiful.
If it doesn't take, you lost the money and it's crazy.
Your body is bruised and your hormones are all over
the place, and you have to have a very solid
relationship because we know of couples that don't survive the process.
Because the women we go coogle, we go crazy. It is,
(11:21):
you know, not to always make light of everything, but
we try to live our lives, our relationship making light
of things. But it's like you're the incredible Hulk. You know,
you're shooting hormones into your body nothing. You can't predict
anything from day to day, how you're gonna feel. You
can't control it no matter how much I try to
help you know, your hormones go hey wire. I know
(11:44):
a lot of people would you know. It's an unspoken
sort of thing, and it's a tough balance because obviously
it's two people going through I V have one of them,
the woman going through a more severe side of it
because of all the injections and the hormones. But the
flip side of that is is definitely a brutal process
on the mail as well. Not physically as brutally brutal,
(12:05):
but mentally very challenging because you want to be as
supportive as you can, but sometimes you're completely bugging. You
smell bucks me, You're you're speaking voice books, You're pushed
away from trying to help. It's very challenging time for me.
That was my life for about five years. Yeah, it was.
(12:30):
Was that crazy? I mean, well, you start at a
certain level already appreciate there's a heightened state in your
personality as it is, and you're just you know, sprinkle
a little that on top of it. Yeah, that's I
won't say crazy. Two great kids out of it. Mentally altered.
(12:53):
So there's a lot of injections involved. Stomach in your
little I had to give all. I remember the first
time I did it. Want to do it. So Eric
had the responsibility of injective. Remember the first time with Sabella.
I was filming a pilot UH in New York and
you had to do the injections on your own and
I will call him videos. I remember being on FaceTime
(13:17):
in between shooting and trying to walk you because you
have to. Sometimes the cotailrmones you have to mix them
and it's this little powder on this little liquid and
you have to be very specific. And I'm like, I
have never injected myself with anything. You know. The whole time,
I'm just getting yelled at and chewed out because I'm
not there. But then I gotta work. Oh so much.
He was working. It's like I wanted him to work,
but I was like, how dare you? I'm here by myself.
(13:39):
I injected myself. It was awful, but you know what
the good thing is. First IVF boom it took was
born and we're like, this is so easy, which we
actually told her today for the first she actually there
was two two embryos took one. Both had heartbeats. I
put three eggs just so you know, and one did
(14:00):
not make it. And that was an interesting thing to
go through. It It hit you very hard. For me,
I've always been in the mindset if it wasn't if
something doesn't happen, it's not meant to happen. And it
was kind of like, you know, that was your body,
and that was God saying that this one wasn't gonna
make this was going to be a problem. But that
was very difficult for you because you go through all
that and boom we had twins and then one heart
(14:22):
beat just you know, drifted away. So we told her
for the first time, and you know how it happened
last night. Funny enough, she came. She came to me saying,
one of her classmates said, you know what, mom, so
and so told me that she was a twin and
the other one didn't make it. And I looked at
her and I said, you were a twin. And this
is something that we would We were going to tell
her for quite some time, like I'm a twins, so exciting.
(14:45):
So I can guarantee you she's at school today telling
her everybody was because that's Abella. There was two of us,
and then I am the one that made it. I
was like, oh, no, I know it was. I hope
that doesn't affect her like in a weird way. No,
she appreciates the understanding I think of it. So the
first one was great with Dr Mars and then we're like,
(15:07):
oh my god, this is fantastic, and out of wall
I had like thirteen embryos, and then they keep dying
on you. That's a thing that you get. You inject
yourself and you produce this amount of eggs and then
they fertilize them, and a lot of them don't make it.
So you can be producing twenty eggs and they put
six and then we have six that we had like
(15:29):
six that were good exactly. We put three. No, we
put three, and then we saved um, we saved the
other three, but then only one ended up being good exactly.
And then like two years later, I was doing devious maze,
I'll never forget. We said, you know what, we have
one available that is froze. Let's just put that in.
So we did that, and I was a positive that
is going to take granted, And that's like a mini
(15:50):
version of an IVF. That one didn't have injections. That
was spilled, but it was spills, but you're doing a
lot of progester on a lot of estrogens. So we
put it in and we're like, oh my, I'm gonna
have another baby. Oh my god, I'm so excited. It's
negative nothing. It didn't even attach. And I was devastated.
And then we did it a third time, a full
(16:11):
in betro full in nothing that didn't happen. So that
now that's to one out of three that took switch doctors.
I remember that I was I was working on de views.
I was in Atlanta and my doctor was in Los Angeles.
So I keept flying, but flying back and forth. And
then when the third one didn't take, the doctor said,
you need to stop working. It's insanity, this back and forth.
(16:34):
When you have a break you you see, this is
a tough thing. And we were getting a lot of
a lot of disagreements about this because you want to
live your life. But stress, you know, they have like
retreat through people that are trying, that are struggling to
get pregnant, like go away, clear your mind. Stress can
be one of the biggest causes of not getting pregnant
naturally or with IVV. And you would always put yourself under,
(16:55):
you know, tons of stress, assuming you could handle it. Listened,
people Eric that third one I'll never forget. So I
fly to from Atlanta to Los Angeles. I do it.
They put my my embryo. I fly to New York
that night, the same day of the mini surgery, because
I had an appearance that a very well paid appearance.
(17:19):
And this is how ambition and craziness because I should
have just chill, and I decided, no, I have to
go to New York. And I am at this red
carpet for this thing. And you know who was there,
and never forget La La Anthony and Bylon what is
her name? Oh my gonna love her? Just Puerto Rican,
beautiful girl. She's a host of the real Adrian Bylon.
(17:45):
Anyway she is, She's beautiful and super sweet. And we're
there and I'm doing the red carpet thinking what am
I doing here? I'm crumpy, I'm bloated. I just did
an IVF. I have four almost five inch heels. I
should be in bed. What am I doing? And that
night I knew it's not going to take. Ill know,
(18:06):
and I see still to this day, I see the
um the pictures of direct carpet and I look at
them and I go, oh my god, why didn't do that?
But anyways, it wasn't meant to be. Then we changed
doctors and we went to doctor Wang, and I did
one more didn't take. Then I didn't another way, got
(18:26):
introduced to what was called the mini IVF, and then
a mini they take different, different different what happens is
my my cocktail was so aggressive to to be able
to create and develop a lot of eggs. But I
will get fifteen eggs. But then when they will do
the blood test the day before the day of the
retrieval to remove the eggs, my hormones were completely whacked.
(18:50):
And an indication of that is the eggs are not viable.
You can remove them and just take a risk and
put them in anyway to see what happens. But they said,
you know what, most likely the eggs are no good,
So don't waste your time. After you've been injecting for
a month and you're bruised and you're like a walking
time bomb. And then finally, so so what are we
doing wrong? Guys? Why am I? Why is this not
wh Why am I ovulating when I'm supposed to be ovulating?
(19:12):
And they said, you know what, we're going to aggressive.
Let's just do mini iv s. And I did three
of those. The first one I got one egg, second
one two eggs, third one one egg and then I
was like, the eggs together now because they freeze them
and then you do it all over again. I'll never forget.
They said at that point, with Dylan. They said, for
someone at your age with all this going on, it
was like up ten chance of even getting pregnant, and
(19:37):
I think it was like fifteen percent chance, and then
it was maybe eight percent chance you could have twins,
which I was freaking out because I put four first time.
I knew it was going to be the last time
that I was going to attempt the IVF because it's
been seven already times, and I was like, I'm done.
I'm like too old. I was forty four at the time,
and I'm like, I can't do this anymore. I I
want my life back. I'm obsessing over this. I'm sick
(20:00):
to my stomach and my body is taking a beating,
my marriage is taking a beating. So this is the
last time I'm doing it. And I and I knew
if it was a boy, I wanted him to be
named Gabriel because I made a promise to Gabriel. Ark angel,
that's what you say it. Arriel is the angel that
gave Virgin Mary the news that she was going to
(20:22):
conceive that she was pregnant, she was having a baby,
So they call him the Angel of Baby. So if
you want to have a baby, you prayed to so
I knew. I made a promise. If I have a boy,
he's going to have his name. And of course party
pooper here um said, um, I don't like yet. No,
that's for all the get all the Gabriels out there
(20:43):
who are listening to the podcast. I love your name.
It wasn't that, it just wasn't my And then she
but she's always been whacked with name. I mean with Sabella.
She was going to be Sabella was Hannah Aluna. At
one point of what the heck name is? Hanna Emily
was in the run and that was until the end.
We decided this is what said. I had a dream,
then you had Pablo Joe Swet. I had a dream,
(21:05):
Pablo jou my child, my boy. I had a dream.
No one's ample. My kid is Pablo Winter. Pablo Jouet
Winter is actually a very distinguished like movie star roster.
The Pablo says that are out there are rock stars,
but it's not going to win one day. I know
your soul is out there because I had a dream
that you were my child. So we finally get pregnant
(21:27):
with Dylan. We're in the hospital. We cannot agree on
before you I'm going to jump ahead because it's very beautiful.
The beautiful. What I'm about to say, it is beautiful.
Say that some of the doctor got you pregnant? What
our kids have like four dads? No, no, what I
was going to say a doctor, I p read a
lot and I will go to the church and played Mary.
(21:48):
I'm going I can't blah blah blah. Anyways, I went
to a botanica somewhere and I got a little stamp
of their changel Gabriel. So when the implantation of the
implantation when the you call it, not retrieval, the putting
them in, putting putting them, I had this stamp of
(22:11):
our Kanja Garbriel. And then they give you a volume
when they when they when they retrieve, you're down, that
is tishat. You're completely sleep and you don't know anything.
When they actually put the embryo on the fertilized um,
it's not called mber not kind of like they call
it something else. When it goes in, they give you
like like a volume, so you kind of like you
(22:33):
kind of like there but not there. And I'll never forget.
I had the stamp of our Kenya Garriel with me
in my hand under my my thigh, and the doctor said,
I just want you to know, and this is what
I'm pulling about to fall asleep. He goes, I want
you to know. Ros it's only ten to fifteen of
this happening. And I looked at him and I said,
he doesn't know that I have God's favor. I want
(22:54):
I want to cry. And then I don't remember anything
right Eric, And then they put the things and we
get a phone call and the blood count is so
high that she's pregnant that they basically say it's probably twins.
And that's when I about passed freaking out. I mean,
you're blessed you have one. I was super I was like, Okay,
she's pregnant. That's great news. But the number that they
(23:18):
tell you when you're pregnant or not, it's like a
range of I'm gonna make it, make it up, but
it's like six something like that. She was at like
fifteen hundred something with the hormone level saying you're pregnant,
which is a very strong indicator that it's two because
the level is so high. Oh that was a long
afternoon for me. Please, I could not wait to get
(23:40):
in there and I was like, is making this very sad?
I'm so excited and sleep because it was twins. Oh,
I was stressed out. And then I go to my
first and then we get there and he's looking. He's like, no,
it's just one. You're like you're lying, you're telling the
doctor there's two, and I'm like, they're not too. He
had says there's one, there's one. Eric he was worried
because he was expecting to find two sacks of two.
(24:01):
And then he said and then he went to my
following tips, thinking, I hope it's not on topic pregnancy,
which is one travel to my tubes and that's very
dangerous for the baby, for the month, for everybody. So
I'm like, oh please god, no, no, no, no, no, no,
and no it was it was just one. And I said,
but why why are yeah? Why am I my levels
so high? And he said, you have a very strong
um child and I was like, oh my god, this
(24:24):
is so beautiful. So then um we go to the hospital.
I delivered this child and I want him to be
able to at something and Eric is like, it's not
gonna the middle name is gonna be it's a promise.
So I'm not leaving the hospital on until you signed
the birth certificate and gabriel is written someone basically I
don't care, means Eric. She wanted Gabrielle, she wanted all
(24:46):
these things. We could not agree on her name to
save our lives. Like nothing, I've never agreed with her
name choices. For the most part. We did get good
with Sabella finally, but we're sitting there and the kid
has no name. It just says no name Winter for
the whole time we're in the hospital, said kept calling
him no name, baby. Well, you should really make a decision,
And I'm like, well, how long do I have? Can
I just do this next week? And we don't know yet.
(25:06):
We don't we can't decide a name. Well, it's really
difficult if you wait till you get out of the hospital,
because then you gotta go back to the paperwork and
it's not as smooth. And I was like, oh my gosh,
Like I said, you guys have a name book like
at the hospital. So I just started going through every
letter in the alphabet looking through names, and I stumbled
upon Dylan and Dylan Winter, Dylan Gabrielle. When Dylan Gabriel
(25:28):
I'm like, I like this. I like this. So I
had to spin it with her and do this whole
pitch about how Dylan's name because we were big on name,
like the meaning of the name for Sabella. Her meaning was,
which we didn't know when we found the name, but
her meaning was God's promise and we're like, oh my God,
that's great, definitely going Sabella. And then when Dylan came up,
it said he was like God of the sea, and
(25:50):
it was all this stuff relating to the ocean. And
I kept saying, ros, you're from Porto Rico. It's an
island surrounded by the ocean. And I didn't remember for anything.
And I was like, okay, that's fine. You threw a
surfing you know, baby shower. You don't even surf. Why
do you have surfboards that a bathing shower is all
about the ocean? And I'm like, this is the name.
(26:10):
And so we ended up going down between Sebastian and
Uh and Dylan, and then I said, all right, rock
paper scissors, No, no, we did that, and then but
then I texted, no, this is funny. So it was
it's a Sebastian Garbrielo Winter or Delan gaba Winter right,
So I text I'm still medicated. I'm like dizzy, right,
And I take my friend Runnie and I goes running Sebastian,
(26:32):
Sebastian Gabriel Winter or l Winter and she goes, well,
what does he look like? Because Sebastian is more like,
he needs to look like dark, olive skin Italiano type
of guy. That's a Sebastian. If it's wide, then I
think it's Dylan. And I'm like, here's a deal, white blood,
like I'm going there. And then it was like Ross
(26:54):
didn't Gabriel Delanel Gabriel, Well, I am calling him only
person and you correct people, which is oddling Gabriel it's
Gabrielle and they don't say it like that. So anyways,
that's our So for the listeners that went really long,
I'm so sorry. I hope that was not boring, Um,
but that is our journey. I hope that explains the IVF.
(27:27):
You know what's crazy, Eric, Um, It's so common nowadays,
and I think women and couples in general are much
more open to sharing their IVF stories. And you know
what I just learned. I had and I had no
idea that the Obama's went through. I had no idea.
Both kids not crazy, um crazy Tagan and John Legend
(27:49):
also UM, and she says the same thing that you
said at the very beginning, which is you you avoid
your whole life to get pregnant, and then when you're ready,
it doesn't happen. And it is. It is mind boggling.
It's mind boggling. And we have here some look just
to wrap it up. Also, I mean, please email us again,
UM if you have more thoughts or comments, because we
will we will pick up on all of this another
(28:10):
episode for sure. UM. We should sept It would be
great to bring an expert. And it's I think it's
a really interesting topic for a lot of people to
talk through and be open to. But you know, I think, yeah,
just there any advice that you might have for women
that are considering this process rouser or or in the
middle of it. UM, I think listen. I think that
(28:33):
the experience and the process is you have to be
ready financially, mentally, emotionally. UM. It's not easy because once
you you you mess with the chemistry of your body.
You know the amount of hormones that you have to
um put into your body. It's it's not easy, it's
not fun. Um, you don't feel like yourself, and and
(28:55):
and and the saddest part is knowing that there's no
guarantee this might work, this might not work. Those ten
days of waiting to get the result are brutal. I
remember I was like like a zombie every every single
time that seven times I did it, I was, I was.
I was a zombie, like waiting for the phone call,
waiting for that blood result. Um. So you have to
be ready. You have to be ready and and and
(29:16):
do a lot of praying, a lot of meditation, and
and then gold Fred, I think, I think motherhood is
the most incredible experience in the world. I know. I
don't know of women that they don't feel like they
need to be moms and that and I respect that,
you know, but if you are blessed enough to go
through the experience, and if you don't get pregnant naturally,
(29:36):
I believe it's a beautiful thing that that science and
human beings and God has given us this incredible mind
to be able to help people. Yeah, that's always a debate,
Like I hear some people say, well, but you know,
it wasn't what God intended, because God didn't make it happen,
you know, it happened through science. And I'm I'm always
a big believer in well, but God gave human disability
ability through science and come up with salute sations to help,
(30:01):
you know, people, And I think that's something that's perspective
and I think you can be open to it, even
if you think, oh, my religion doesn't allow it, or
I'm not you know, I think I wouldn't shut anything
out through so many emotions. I remember when when they
don't take, and you go through all this burden, you know,
it doesn't take, and you and you start thinking about
all the women in the world that get pregnant that
(30:21):
they don't even want to have kids, and there and
some of them are so responsible, you know, and you go,
I don't understand the world. I don't understand I don't
understand creation, the ones I really wanted that that that
will be amazing mothers that have the capability of giving
a child a beautiful life. It becomes so difficult. And
then you have girls that it's just a fluke, you
(30:42):
know me, and the first time boom it happens, they
don't even want to be moms and they're completely responsible
and you just go why it's like, I don't I
don't understand the world if it's so sad. But if
you're ready and you want to have and you want
to be a mom, if you have the financial means,
you know, you know what, So beautiful, guys, I am.
We have all that struggle for many many many years
and um, she didn't work. And he's an actor and
(31:06):
his career, he's very talented, his career was up and down.
So it's very expensive and because of their age, they
wanted to do this. So they emailed a lot of
friends and saying, we have this dream and this desire,
we want to be parents and we can't afford it.
So will mean the world to us if if you
guys can help in any way. And you know what,
(31:27):
friends came through and they paid for that in virtual
and they have a beautiful boy. Is that beautiful. It's
a beautiful story. So some other questions that we you know,
just in regards to IVF, was I too old for
I V? People think I did one of thirty eight,
one of forty four. Usually when you do it, it
comes down to this, is this is an interesting thing? That.
I remember speaking to the doctors because you know, I
(31:48):
love all this. When did they stop? When did they tell?
You know, it's all about your embryos, right, so your
uterus is fine. So if you had frozen your eggs,
you know, back in your twenties, or if you had
you know, had your eggs frozen back and even in
your thirties, you could be in your fifties and use
those same eggs. Now. One thing that's interesting I remember
talking to the doctors about is this. You know, science
is such a male driven industry and a lot of
(32:11):
times getting pregnant or not getting pregnant was always the
blame was always pointed towards the woman, that it was
a female problem. And as science has gone on and
it's you know, becoming more with no gender as far
as the knowledge goes, they're realizing, look, men also, even
though we were you produce semen constantly. The older mail
(32:33):
is also can cause fertility issues when it comes to
getting pregnant or even defects because the batch of sperm
you're producing at an older age isn't going to be
as as the quality of the batch is not going
to be as good as as it was as a
younger age. This is what the infertility doctor was telling me,
and I found that fascinating. That always the girls always check,
(32:53):
you know, check the willie of your husband or your partner.
Is very possible that it's their problem, so that you know, look,
I think one thing I know about it doesn't matter.
Let's say the in future part. Just being an older
parent is tough. There's one. It's a reason that people
have kids at a young age because you start going, wow,
I'm in my forties and I got two kids, and
(33:13):
you get beat up, you know, you get you're tired.
You come home and they want to play, and they
have this energizer bunny energy and they don't want to stop.
And you're like, why am I so exhausted? Why can't
I just keep up with you? But that's I think
having kids at any age over. You know, in the forties,
you guys want to do something crazy. You wanna do
something crazy. It's a true story. I don't think I'm
crazy or mystical or magical, or I believe in fool
(33:34):
food stuff. But if they've been listening to the podcast,
you just checked off everything that they probably think you are, Well,
this is a true story. What I'm about to say.
So last week when we had um Jenna and you know,
she's very mystical, and we talked about fin Chewi how
do you say chew chew a character and star. So
(33:56):
this finial week guy that we had our home before,
it's about la. We had him three times already, but
the first time we had him. He's Eric's dad. Um
Wayne is engaged. It's basically has a life partner for
many many years. And she's Chinese. So she said, you know,
I have a wonderful and chewy person. And we hadn't
come to our house to just to check the energy
(34:20):
and move things around, and he told us you're gonna
have a baby. By then, we were not even trying
or we were about to start doing the idea if
we didn't, we kept quiet, We didn't say anything, and
he spoke beautifully and he didn't he didn't know the sex,
but he did say, um, it's gonna be a great
communicator and he's going to be more famous than you guys.
And I was like, okay, that sounds interesting, but because
(34:41):
we were not pregnant, I was like whatever. Anyways, fast
forward two, we have a baby. We have Sabella. Maybe
Sabella is now eight months. He comes back to the
house because we wanted to do some cleansing again. He
meets Sabella and then he starts speaking Chinese with Grace
and it gets kind of like heavy, and I like uncomfortable,
and I'm looking at Eric and I'm looking at and
(35:03):
his dad, and I'm going, what are the saying? So
I said, what's going on? What's going on? And I
see Grace's face kind of like uncomfortable on going what what? What?
What happened? What is he saying? Because I'm immediately thinking
he's saying something bad about Sabella. What's going on? And
then she says, no, nothing, nothing, I'm gonna please tell me,
And she goes, well, we've never told you, but the
first time that he came that he told you guys
(35:24):
were going to have a baby. When we left in
the car, he said to us that we were never
going to have kids naturally because we were not compatible
to have children naturally. And what a wonderful thing that
we use science. And he got to meet Sabella and
I started bawling because I'm going, oh my god, he knew,
(35:47):
you know, so he understands the journey. He knew, he
said before there was a he said he knew before,
and then we had to do use IVF all over again.
So yeah, that's the story, not crazy. What's his name?
Uh well, I asked my dad. He just came to
the house. That's what he does. I know that's pinning.
(36:09):
He came to the house again, um the end of
the year two thousand nineteen, and he did the charts
and were happy about that. I was very happy. I
loved the reading the first time because it was all
about you having success. And then it came to this time,
nonse when I heard something awesome. He told Eric that
I was his lucky Charming, but basically that he couldn't
(36:30):
take a step in life without maybe next to him
because I would bring him good luck and good fortune
and a good life. He said, even when you go
to auditions, she should go with you over Well, I'm
gonna go to go that far, but it was beautiful.
I hope you feel that way totally. Anyways, all right,
we take a break, Ye take a break, all right.
(37:00):
We want to hear about you and your thoughts and
your questions. I know this topic is fascinating. Like I
said before, it will be awesome to bring an actual
fertility doctor and another couple to tell their stories. Is
an important topic. Many women are going through this, so
I think it's valuable and so please email at he
said agr D whole podcast. That's not an email, that's
(37:20):
an actual handle on Instagram. So d M or the
email Eric and Ross at I Heart radio dot com.
I have a question for using your we make beautiful
kids healthy kids? Would you go and try it for
another one? What happens if you have naturally happens? We
make sure that's not gonna happen. How you don't use
(37:44):
I don't use protection skill skill? Um no, not going
to know. Listen. I I you know, being a father's
my life. I love it. But I told you before
I was good with one. I um you know, the
older we get. I always had an issue with just
health of the baby and the embryos and making sure
(38:05):
there was no problems because we went through a lot.
We didn't agree on all that because I I am
fine again with genetic testing and doing all those things.
But then if you do genetic testing, there's also a
risk that you can jeopardize the integrity of the EMBAM
explain what that means because people let me explain. So
you're gonna explain it better than me, for sure. So
you have your embryos, and then if you want to
(38:27):
find out the sex, because this is I'm going I'm
gonna get in there. This is how advanced science is nowadays.
You can know exactly what you put it in. So
it is it's a boy, is it a girl? You
know everything right, So it's called genetic testing, and a
lot of times they do it for health reasons. So
they choose the chromosome for health reasons. Yes, they check
(38:47):
the chromosomes, they check the DNA, they check everything to
make sure that it's a viable embryo. That is a
viable everything that they baby is healthy. So well what
happens um when they poke it, when they put that
little needle bing right, can compromise the embryos, they can
kill it. So with Sabella, I had six available, I
(39:09):
put three, and still I was not comfortable because I
didn't produce, so I didn't have twenty embryos, thirty ambrios
like a lot of women have the blessing of having
I was like, I don't want to compromise that. The egg,
so it is what it is. Whatever, even if I
got an alien, you can also wait and do a
standard CVS or an AMBNIO any of that you but
(39:29):
you can do those later in pregnancy. But you again
can still compromise commis child in there, but a lot
of people do with the percentages are low. So it
was a big negotiation between me and Eric because he
wanted to do it. Because if I was thirty eight,
blood work back and this is before the harmony test existed,
which is now out um. But with Sabella was that
they didn't have the harmony test with you. You had
(39:52):
your blood work done and a certain protein level came
back a little off with Sabella, and because it was off,
I was freaking out and I said, let's do a CVS,
Let's do an amnual either one, let's do one. I
want to make sure the baby's okay. And you didn't
want to do it. And that was a big, big
argument and I ended up letting that go and blood
(40:13):
Thank god we had a very healthy child. I call
my brother he's a doctor, and said, Peter, this is
what's happening. I mean tears going. Eric rather be crazy
because he wants me to do this, but again, nobody,
nobody knows the outcome, I mean of what could happen.
But we trusted in it and everything was fine at
the end of the day. That was always a big
factor to me and you and I don't fully agree
on the testing process. Now with Dylan, they have a
(40:35):
new thing called the Harmony test. Is just a straight
up blood test and that gives you a lot of
stuff upfront, which is really a relief overall early on
you can get this. To be honest, the main reason
why why you wouldn't have another health Health has always
been one thing because I just you know, having a
healthy child is has always been something that sits in
(40:55):
my head right. But at the end of the day,
I again, I was an only child. I was happy
having one. Then we had too. I'm super happy having to.
I don't feel like I need anymore and I'm at
a good place and I think our family is at
a good place. Did you ever think about adopting, world, Huh?
Did you ever think about adopting? We talked about it.
I'm totally I'm totally up for for adoption. I think
(41:17):
it's a beautiful thing. We have a lot of friends
that have done adoption, and their homes have been filled
with amazing children. So adoption has always been something we've
talked about and thought about in our in our journey.
And I think it's I think when families do that,
it's incredible. Um, but you wouldn't do it now. I
just don't think we're in a place where we where
we at least where I want more kids. I'm happy
(41:37):
with two. You already maybe you already got another dog
of the house that you forced upon us. I mean,
what are you trying to do to me here? I
got no opinions in the whole house. I always thought
I was going to adopted the kid. Well, right now,
you've got a dog that is sitting in limbo. No
what Archie is sitting in limbo? Limbo, he's actually loving life.
He's sitting in the ground, but he went from from
from He's in his dog bed. But we don't know
(41:59):
what happening with Archie. And you see the pictures I
posted this weekend guys with Eric an Archie love affair.
It's like pressure, pure pressure. Thank you. But you know
what I did something very beautiful that's not I thank
to you and I said thank you so much for
your patience and your love, and and for allowing Archie
the possibility of a beautiful life. It's all because of you.
(42:21):
I love you so much. M M I did I know.
I appreciate it you for real, like I will never forget.
You will see what the outcome of Archie in our household.
We'll be resolved soon. He's a wonderful dog. That's what
I'm saying. You can hear up all about peer pressure,
(42:43):
trying to make me happ like pushy, pushy person. You're
trying to force dogs on me, kidding kids on me
in a game. A year and a half, Rosan and
Sanchez Eric Winter adopted a kid, one from the point
they one from Puerto Rico, just like the dogs. If
the rest beautique beautiful. You really would take on another
(43:04):
kid right now? You really would? No, I'm thinking pregnancy
or like adopting. No, either way, just starting over with
another child. I'll do it. Everything is so easy, I'll
do it, do it. I just figured as we go,
I don't do this, I'm fine. Can you take care
(43:24):
of this? And you also want taking care of that thules.
I've been taking care of three schedules at that point, yeah,
I'll take another child. My husband will take care of
everything with schedules. I'll take Oh my god, oh my god.
I think Dylan will pass out. And Sabella would love it.
Bella's begging for a little girl, for a baby girl.
Every single day. She wants to have a little sister.
(43:44):
What about surrogacy, I'm I'm all. I'm up for all
that stuff for families that are trying to have children.
I got nothing against any of it. I just don't
I'm not looking to find a surrogate. I'm good. You're good.
I know you're good. I know you're good. We're good.
We're actually very blessed, very blessed. Um. We have really
(44:05):
amazing kids. Thank God. Got a hang out. I think
we should get like a snake or something. Come on,
that's the next thing. I wanted a weird topic change,
but I was just thinking about this after giving away
Honey the turtle. Do you want to get a snake?
I'll set up for a go a rabbit. You don't
want to have an Angora rabbit? Although you know what
(44:26):
your your hair, Lady dina Um the rookie had a
goa and go a rabbit and said they're they're amazing,
but they bite everything, furniture, clothes, they just ruin everything.
And her husband wasn't very pleased. And I'm like, oh
that'd be Eric, So no, A go anyway, So we
(44:47):
covered IVF, we covered live, we covered adoption, We answer questions. Advice.
Don't wait to have a baby past thirty five. I
know it's very common nowadays, ladies. I did it, um,
and I always will have this little voice saying I
wonder if that was part of it, because you know
your body changes, Um, it's textbook. The quality of the
(45:10):
egg changes. So if you can free your eggs, or
if you can try to become a mother before thirty five,
it's much easier. I VF. It's not easy. It's a
beautiful result. If it's positive and your life changes forever
for the better, and you forget everything and every every
tier and every bruise, you forget about it because once
you have that little angel with you, it was all
worth it. But my advice, UM, be very sure of
(45:32):
your decision. Make sure that that you are in a
very solid relationship. If you are in a relationship. UM no,
that it's hard, but it's doable. And listen, I did it.
We didn't regret it. We did it. We just spoke
to our producers. We're looking at him right now and saying,
this doctor thing is going to happen. It's happening one
(45:53):
next episode. We're gonna bring in a doctor to answer
all of the listeners questions, thoughts, everything you need to
know about I VS. Because we covered UM as much
as we could of our experience, what I experienced you.
But if you guys have a specific questions, UM, it's
much better to have an expert. So DM email and
we'll make it. We'll make it awesome. I will answer
(46:13):
all the questions. Eric and Roz at iHeart radio dot com,
let's make this happen and send your stuff in. We're
going to have an amazing guest. I love you all right,
Love you too. Subscribe to he said am v hoo
on iHeart Radio, Apple podcast or anywhere you get your
podcast
Host
Roselyn Sanchez
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