Relationships: Marriage

In this thought-provoking episode of The Heartbeat of Faith Podcast, hosted by Dr. Andrew Farley, we dive deep into the pages of the Bible, searching for wisdom on healthy relationships. Contrary to what you might expect, the Bible doesn't serve up a collection of perfect love stories. Instead, it unveils the lives of flawed individuals, some with noble intentions, others not so much, but all surrounded by God's enduring faithfulness, even in the midst of their brokenness.

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As we journey through these stories, we discover the profound mystery of Christian marriage. The apostle Paul describes it as something much deeper than the unity of two individuals; it's a reflection of Christ's love for His church and the church's love for Him. In our search for healthier relationships, we find the ultimate example in Jesus. He is the third strand that makes a marriage unbreakable, and the more intertwined He is in every aspect of our relationships, the healthier they become.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:01):
Let us pray. Love is patient and is kind. Love
doesn't envy, Love doesn't brag, is not proud, doesn't behave
itself inappropriately, doesn't seek its own way, is not provoked,
takes no account of evil, doesn't rejoice in unrighteousness, but

(00:21):
rejoices in the truth, bears all things, believes all things,
hopes all things, and endures all things. First Corinthians, Chapter thirteen,
verses four through seven. Dear Lord, when I consider what
love is, patient, kind, humble, and righteous, I realize that

(00:43):
I possess all these qualities through your indwelling spirit. You
are always patient, kind, humble, and righteous. You are the
embodiment of love itself, and you can express your love
through me. Thank you for making me perfectly close to
you forever so that I may draw new life from you,

(01:05):
allowing you to live your life in and through me.
I want to reflect you in all my relationships at home,
with friends, at work, everywhere. I want to display your
perfect love to everyone around me. You have given me
everything I need for life and godliness through your spirit,

(01:26):
and I will trust you as my supply today in Jesus' name, Amen,
Thank you for praying with me today Now discover the
profound intricacies of Scripture through Prey dot COM's podcast The
Heartbeat of Faith with Doctor Andrew Farley.

Speaker 2 (01:51):
You can scour the Bible searching for healthy relationships, but
you'll quickly realize they're hard to find. The Bible doesn't
offer us stories of perfect marriages. Instead, it reveals broken people,
some with good intentions and some with bad being surrounded

(02:12):
by God's faithfulness despite their flaws. Hi, I'm doctor Andrew Farley,
and welcome to another episode of the Heartbeat of Faith podcast.
We've aimed to survey Biblical stories in search of compelling images, messages,
and overarching themes to encourage our faith. This week we'll

(02:35):
be looking at biblical relationships. Today we'll look at marriage.
Many books, podcasts, and businesses have been dedicated to finding
the perfect formula for a healthy and thriving marriage. People
have four step approaches to communication or ten tips for

(02:56):
a healthy marriage. Interestingly, the Old Test takes a different approach,
as even its most well known characters have some serious
marital problems. Men and women have struggled in their union
since the very beginning. Adam and Eve's perfect union in
the Garden was eventually tainted by sin, shame, and shifting

(03:21):
the blame.

Speaker 3 (03:26):
Adam fell deeper and deeper into his own shame and tragedy.
He pointed towards Eve, his companion and the woman he
was meant to love and protect, and threw blame towards her.
The woman you gave me, she gave me the fruit.
Eve was falling into the same self loathing and pride,

(03:46):
and now left alone by her husband. She pointed to
the serpent and said, the serpent deceived me, and I ate.

Speaker 2 (03:56):
Abraham and Sarah dealt with unhealthy patterns of life and
cheating to get what they wanted. Sarah was impatient with
her role and at times even vindictive. Abraham didn't care
for his wife the way he should have and compromised
his integrity.

Speaker 3 (04:19):
Sria's impatience reeled within her as Eve took the forbidden
fruit so she would become like God. So SIRRII devised
her own plan to replace God's plan. Go in to
my servant Hagar and have a child with her. I
will claim the child as my own, she said Abram.

(04:41):
Just as his ancestor, Adam did nothing to defend his
wife's honor and integrity. Instead, He took the Egyptian made
servant to his bed, and the two embraced often and
had sex until a child was conceived. Given full permission
by his wife, yet ignoring a call to be a
better man, Abram went into her again and again, falling

(05:06):
further from God's plan for him.

Speaker 2 (05:09):
David had many wives and took another man's wife to
add to the list. Ultimately it caused a ripple effect
of dysfunction in his household.

Speaker 3 (05:23):
You are that man, Nathan yelled, pointing his finger at
the king. God has anointed you to be king over Israel.
He delivered you out of the hand of Saul. He
has blessed you with riches beyond your wildest dreams. Not
only do you have a wife, but you have three,
and yet you strike down Uriar for his David's soul

(05:45):
began to crumble as Nathan spoke for God. Yet he
said nothing. Nathan continued and said, thus says the Lord,
the sword shall not leave your household. There will be
strife in your household and war among your children.

Speaker 2 (06:03):
You can scour the Old Testament searching for healthy relationships,
but you'll quickly realize they're hard to find. Instead, it
showcases flawed people, some with good intentions and some with bad,
being surrounded by God's faithfulness. Despite their flaws, Adam and

(06:25):
Eve could have imploded and humanity would have been lost
before it could begin, but their love created hope.

Speaker 3 (06:35):
Adam knew his wife again. She gave birth to a
son and named him Seth, saying, for God has given
me another child instead of Abel, for Cain killed him.
A son was also born to Seth, and he named
him Enosh. At that time, men began to call on

(06:56):
Yahweh's name. Genesis four twenty five to twenty six.

Speaker 2 (07:02):
Abraham and Sarah nearly squandered their promise, but God was
faithful to them, and through them came a son of promise.

Speaker 3 (07:14):
Abraham was one hundred years old and Sarah was ninety
years old. At last, the promises of God were realized.
After months of an unexpected pregnancy, Sarah gave birth to
a son. The promised son of God emerged from the
once barn womb of Sarah. Abraham named him Isaac, which

(07:37):
means laughter, a suitable name since Sarah's old age had
made it impossible for her to have children. Yet nothing
was impossible for God. Sarah rejoiced, saying, God has made
laughter for me, and everyone who hears of this will
laugh over me, for I have had a child in

(07:57):
my old age.

Speaker 2 (08:00):
David and Bathsheba's union was a forced attempt to hide
their sin, but they eventually became partners, and their son
went on to be the wisest king Israel had ever known.

Speaker 3 (08:17):
Bathsheba looked at David. His hair was gray and his
face cracked like worn leather. She looked at David's chest,
His once strong and broad chest was now struggling for
each breath. Tears slowly dripped down Bathsheba's face as she
looked at her husband. She bowed beside him and held
his hand. David opened his eyes and turned his head

(08:38):
to see his wife beside him. They looked at one another.
David wore a handsome grin on his face when he
looked at her. What can I do for you, David whispered.
Bethsheba touched his face and held his hand. My lord,
you made a vow that Solomon would become king after you. However,
Aronaija is making himself king right under your nose. All

(09:02):
the nobles gather with him for a celebration. She rose
to her feet and looked down at David. The kingdom
is waiting for you to announce with king. If you
do not act, Solomon and I will be killed. David
sat up in his bed and stood to his feet.
His legs shook and his body trembled. David raised his
chin up high and puffed out his chest. As my

(09:24):
Lord and savior lives, Solomon will be the next king
of Israel. Best she've a bowed to him and thanked him.

Speaker 2 (09:32):
Solomon himself would write that a man alone is vulnerable.
Two people are formidable, but three are impenetrable. For a
three cord strand is not quickly broken. God has a
design for marriage. That design allows men and women to

(09:52):
partner in separate but equal roles, submitting to God and
each other. A million and practices can make a marriage work,
but only God can truly shape it into what it's
meant to be. Listen to Paul speak about marriage and
Ephesians as he begins with the practical aspects of marriage,

(10:14):
then transitions into its.

Speaker 3 (10:17):
Essence, submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God.
Wives submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the
Lord for the husband is the head of the wife,
even as Christ is the head of the Church, and
he is the savior of the body. Therefore, as the

(10:40):
church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be
to their own husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives.
Even as Christ also loved the Church and gave himself
for it, that he might sanctify and cleanse it with
the washing of water by the word, that he might

(11:00):
present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot
or wrinkle, or any such thing, but that it should
be holy and without blemish. So ought men to love
their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his
wife loveth himself. For no man ever yet hated his

(11:22):
own flesh. But nourisheth, and cherisheth it, even as the
Lord the Church. For we are members of his body,
of his flesh, and of his bones. For this cause
shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall
be joined unto his wife, and they too shall be
one flesh. This is a great mystery. But I speak

(11:47):
concerning Christ and the Church. Ephesians five twenty one through
thirty two.

Speaker 2 (11:56):
Paul describes marriage as a grand mister, which is appropriate.
Marriage is about something more significant than two individuals. It's
about Christ and his bride, the Church. The love, respect, sacrifice,
and submission a husband and wife display to one another

(12:18):
is a picture of Christ's love for the Church and
the Church's love for Christ. One of the healthier relationships
found in the Bible is between Ruth and Boaz. Their
love was a foreshadowing of Christ's love for us.

Speaker 3 (12:38):
I am your servant, Ruth, She whispered, please spread your
wings over me as a redeemer. Her heart was beating fast,
and her hands sweat slightly out of nervousness. Boas was
known as a kinsman redeemer. In those days, kinsmen redeemers
could marry a widow in place of a deceased relative
in order to take care of her. Ruth was truly

(12:59):
asked King of Boaz would want to marry her. Ruth
could barely see Boas a smile in the dim candlelight.
He sat up more and leaned over towards her and said,
in all your time here, you have not chased after
all the young men here, whether poor or rich. Instead,
you have remained here with me, worked and been pleasant company.

(13:19):
Do not fear and take heart because everybody knows you
are a worthy and beautiful woman.

Speaker 2 (13:26):
We might be tempted to look to Adam, Eve, Abraham, Sarah, David,
or Bathsheba, or perhaps even Ruth and Boaz to try
to imitate them in marriage. But we don't need to
imitate anyone because the living Christ is inside of us.
He's doing marriage in and through you, unique to who

(13:49):
you are and who your spouse is. Let the indwelling
Christ guide your steps. He's your Counselor remember this, your spouse,
as wonderful as they might be, can't meet all your needs.
They are the creation, not the Creator. When we turn

(14:10):
our eyes from the creation to the Creator, we're released
from the burden of unrealistic expectations. We let go of
the belief that our spouse should meet every need. That's freedom,
my friends. Now, when they hurt us, forgive as Christ

(14:30):
forgave you, wipe the slate clean, release them from any debt.
They owe you nothing, And in that beautiful act you
reflect your new heart and the very nature of Christ.
And as for temptation, let's shift our perspective in marriage.
We can recognize that sin is a common enemy we

(14:53):
both share. Husband and wife, don't have to fight each other. Instead,
they can and rally together, knowing that the power of
sin aims to divide them. But Jesus Christ he unites
in all this. Remember you're not on your own in
your relationship. Christ is always with you and in you, guiding, leading,

(15:20):
and inspiring every step. Stay rooted in Him and watch
your relationship flourish into something healthy and beautiful. Thank you
for listening to today's episode of the Heartbeat of Faith.
Follow the podcast so you can learn the Bible in
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(15:44):
and for more encouragement in God's grace, visit Andrewfarley dot org.
That's Andrewfarley dot org.