"The Devil Made Me Do It" Recap Season 5, Episode 19

It's time for a little double trouble! Mary-Kate & Ashley are on-screen simultaneously as they play the roles of "good Michelle" and "bad Michelle", while our very own Kimmy and Steph have their first real bonding moment (awww). Join us as we recap an episode filled with special effects, another failed Joey relationship and multiple Mowry's! It's all right here on How Rude, Tanneritos!

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:18):
I can't do this. I can't be trusted right, Yeah, No,
that's too much stress. I don't don't ever trust Jody.
That's the I mean motto I live like.

Speaker 2 (00:27):
Wow, Wow, there's certain things you should trust me with.
Being responsible for any sort of electronics is probably not
one of them.

Speaker 1 (00:34):
It's not one of them. No, No, how are you? Baby? Hi?
I'm great. I'm doing a lot better than you apparently, so.
Uh right, I'm fully in fall mode. I yes, yeah, yeah,
I've been baking. I know this is a this is
a rare occurrence. I love this. Okay. I baked per
simmon bread with simmons from my backyard. Oh my god,

(00:57):
I have per simmons in my bowl right now? Are
they fully? They're full of persimmons? Yeah, so are delicious.
I love them. Yeah, I've learned a lot. I didn't
know there were different kinds of persimmons. There's like a
big yeah. Oh they're so good. Oh they're delicious. Yeah,
it's a little it's like a cousin of a pump

(01:19):
like pumpkin bread is kind of what it tastes like.

Speaker 2 (01:21):
Yeah, yeah, like sices, probably of the nutmegs and the things.

Speaker 1 (01:26):
Cinnamon, the nutmeg, all the sugars. Look at you. I
know it was So I've made some persimmons. I'm going
to try a persimon margarita a little bit later. Okay,
I think you should have done it now, you know
what I mean. Just let's start tasting. It's you know,

(01:46):
these days, somewhere there are no rules anymore. Maybe it
doesn't matter. How do you think you have?

Speaker 2 (01:53):
Eighty percent of the people in the world are probably
drinking at ten am these days.

Speaker 1 (02:00):
Okay, next week it'll be a happy hour at ten
am on Howard Dannerita. Right, everybody show up a little
little sauce, right, Yeah, but I like it. I also
have pamellos. Sorry, I'm just going to talk about.

Speaker 2 (02:12):
Please do for a minute for Simmons and pamelos, Simmons
and promelos.

Speaker 1 (02:16):
So I tried to make a pamello margarita the other night.
It did not go well. No, they're huge.

Speaker 3 (02:22):
They're massive, and they're massive and a little bitter.

Speaker 1 (02:27):
So they're too grapefruity. I'm not I'm gonna say they're
very They're very, very.

Speaker 2 (02:33):
Much like a grapefruit, so they're a little I love grapefruit,
but I don't know that I would want it.

Speaker 3 (02:39):
Like in a well, I don't know, I like grapefruit juice.

Speaker 1 (02:42):
Oh see, I don't, I I do, I like any
of it. So why I thought I would like a pamello?
Have you ever? Have you ever had a pamelo before? No?
Oh okay, So it's just because.

Speaker 2 (02:55):
It's in your backyard and you were like, hey, yeah,
I'm like, what am I going to do with this?

Speaker 1 (02:58):
Is that happy thing? All sized? Right? You're like, oh
my god, that lemon has a problem. Yeah it's Yeah.

Speaker 2 (03:06):
The neighbor across the street from us here has pomelos and.

Speaker 1 (03:09):
Yeah, oh yeah, I know. So I think part of
the problem is there's not as much juice. They're not
as juicy as I was. They're pretty dry. Like yeah,
it took me three pamelos just to make two margaritas.
And I'm like, this is I could feel like lemon
And yeah, it's like a losing game, you know.

Speaker 2 (03:28):
Yeah, as big as they are, you shouldn't have to
use more than one.

Speaker 1 (03:31):
I agree, I should be able to like, you know,
that should give you a gallon of juice? Agree? But no,
it gave me like two ounces maybe wow, one one pamelo.
So yeah, not a fan of the pamelos. Okay, what
am I doing? What am I next? I don't know. Well,
we have tangerines. Those won't be ready until late November,

(03:52):
like a little tangerine. Yeah, tangerines are delicious. Next year,
I hope to have some cherries. Okay, that's past cherry pickies.
We got three cherries this year, so I'm very hopeful
for next year that we're going to get more than three.

Speaker 2 (04:05):
My poor, sad little garden that I was all excited about.

Speaker 1 (04:09):
It was the mice.

Speaker 2 (04:11):
The little mouse figured out how to climb up the
back of my thing around the netting and got in
and spaked all of my cucumbers. Every day I come
out and there was one more man and all of
the cucumbers were gone, picked off my peppers and the tomatoes,

(04:31):
and so I was just like, wow, get it. Everything
is just like growing and dead, and.

Speaker 1 (04:36):
I'm like I can't even. It was so mad because
it was so we were so there, and then it
was like he was very the mouse was quite thrilled.
He was for sure, he really he was very well fed.
I've got to figure out how to remedy that for
next year. The fact that you tried with the netting
and then you were still thwarted by the mouse.

Speaker 2 (04:55):
Well it's narrow, I've realized it's there.

Speaker 3 (04:58):
It's the little I left that much behind.

Speaker 1 (05:01):
The they can get standing uh.

Speaker 2 (05:03):
Planter, and it's you know, rough woods, so they just
climbed right up in it.

Speaker 1 (05:07):
Oh man, those little buggers. They're very, very smart and
they can fit in any size of space.

Speaker 3 (05:13):
It's cabable anyway.

Speaker 2 (05:15):
So yeah, my garden is not as uh fruitful as yours.

Speaker 1 (05:19):
Not as fruitful. Well, I had to rescue the pamellos
from the deer because I had deer in my backyard
eating not the pamelos, I'm sorry, the per simmons. Oh,
I was gonna say. I was like, wow, deer has
a interesting taste balad. Yes, this is like I love
the bitterer. Yeah. No, no, they don't like the bitter,
but the pamelos yeah or no the per Simmons's. Yeah,
they were just like snacking on those, and so I'm like, no,

(05:41):
I'm going to harvest the rest of these. You go,
why are you crying? Sorry, little little why are you crying?
She's staring at the door and she's whining. I'm very sorry.
I'm just going to dominate this pre show chatter. I
walked in before I even started this, and you're like, Hey,
how's everybody's day? And I was like, I hate everything?
So I went on an therapy. Yeah. Yeah, we had

(06:04):
a little ten minute Yeah, therapeutic. It's venteene sash. That's
it's been.

Speaker 3 (06:11):
It's just been like two weeks of is what it is?

Speaker 1 (06:16):
You know what?

Speaker 2 (06:17):
I suggest things where you're like, it's just you feel
like the salmon swimming upstream constantly.

Speaker 1 (06:24):
Nothing is. Everything is ten times harder than it needs
to be.

Speaker 2 (06:29):
I don't know how many planets are in retrogade right now,
but it's got to be all of them.

Speaker 1 (06:33):
I don't know something. And we're getting ready to turn
the clocks back. So you hate you hate that? Yeah, God,
it's all connected. That's it. I'm dead, all connected. I'm
just gonna fall into a deep depression now. Sorry, we'll
wake you up when it's you know what, I need.

Speaker 3 (06:52):
A hibernate, that's really what I need to do.

Speaker 1 (06:54):
We're looking for a replacement co host, just for.

Speaker 2 (06:57):
The Jody taken into her little cave and will not
be coming out that's literally what I felt like doing.

Speaker 1 (07:04):
Like this whole week, I've been like, no, I don't
want to anymore. He was like, I've gotten a stupid accident,
not even a bad one.

Speaker 3 (07:12):
And it wasn't even in my car. It was a
Misscal's car, his.

Speaker 1 (07:14):
Brand of car. The more you told me about this,
the worse it got. It was. I'm glad you're okay.

Speaker 2 (07:20):
The car itself, the body is fine. But the guy
hit the passenger wheel and pushed it in. The wheel
took all the impact. So now you got alignment, you
got struts, you got the power steering it. It's like
it's all kind of like six thousand dollars, which is insane.

Speaker 1 (07:39):
You'd think, oh, I'll just change this tire.

Speaker 2 (07:42):
Tire with the the tire wasn't even flat.

Speaker 1 (07:45):
It wasn't even flat, was like not even hard.

Speaker 2 (07:49):
It just hit like in the right way and pushed
it in. And I was like, oh, look, lick the
paint off.

Speaker 1 (07:57):
It was you didn't do anything.

Speaker 2 (08:00):
Yeah, yeah, the same guy was the same thing. And
now I'm like, but my, but now.

Speaker 1 (08:05):
It's not so good. Anyway, I'm sorry.

Speaker 2 (08:08):
I went and worked out this morning and just tried
to like lift heavyweights and did that help?

Speaker 1 (08:13):
No? No, but I tried. That's okay, it didn't make
it worse. Okay, well that's good, that's good. But it
didn't you didn't have the cleansing effect of a good
workout where you're just sweating out all of your aggravation.

Speaker 2 (08:27):
I sweated out a lot of aggravation. But I think
I'm so full of it that it's gonna take. It's
gonna take a lot more sweating than that.

Speaker 1 (08:33):
It's gonna take. Yeah, it's gonna take a few sessions. Yeah,
I don't know. I'm also just perimenopausal and angry. You
know what I mean? You ever had you know when
you have those days.

Speaker 2 (08:41):
But it's been multiple days where I just wake up
and I'm like, everything.

Speaker 1 (08:47):
Is wrong everything? Yeah, no, I get it. I Hey,
I went through menopause during the pandemic and my mother's death.
Oh my god. I was just like nobody if you
didn't hear from me for a year or two, that's
why that's literally me. I'm like, I don't want to
talk to my friends, I don't want to talk to anybody.
Don't ask me to do anything. You just like, don't

(09:10):
talk to me. I am incapable. Yeah, you just want
to like off the tree, uncapable.

Speaker 3 (09:16):
Birth Like I am always very capable.

Speaker 2 (09:19):
So when I have these moments when I'm like, I
just I can't handle life, like.

Speaker 1 (09:22):
The mouse has the mouse has won, the mouse the
mouth everything, it's uh one at all won? I lost.
It's a metaphor for your life. The mouse ate everything.

Speaker 2 (09:32):
Now say everything gardens in shambles.

Speaker 1 (09:36):
I am I need a shower. I don't know. Well,
you know what would make you feel much better is
discussing an episode that revolves completely around Michelle. Oh, yes,
how did you don't put you in a good mood?
Is the thing that is? It is the salve to
my soul? Maybe that's what started your chain of bad events.

(09:59):
Maybe that's what.

Speaker 3 (10:00):
No, No, this happened long before I watched the episode.

Speaker 1 (10:02):
Much are you watching it?

Speaker 2 (10:04):
Didn't?

Speaker 1 (10:04):
I was like, oh here week out? Yeah we go? Yeah, yeah,
so it's missing. Was a mond a bad montage or
a dream sequence? Was this about? It was almost a
dream sequence, that's true.

Speaker 2 (10:15):
Yeah, it wasn't this shy of a dream sequence.

Speaker 1 (10:20):
It was bad whatever it was? Yes? Oh boy, Well,
welcome back to how Rude Tanertos I'm Andrea Barber and
I'm Jodie Sweeten. Maybe I don't know.

Speaker 2 (10:29):
I've decided if I want to continue being here today.

Speaker 1 (10:32):
You mean whoever you want to be? Yeah, this is
uh today we're discussing, like how do I start this show?
They we're discussing Season five, episode nineteen, The Devil Made
Me Do It? Like this everything this episode okay. This

(10:56):
originally aired February eighteenth, nineteen ninety two, and it goes
a little something like this. When Michelle's disobedience lands her
in the doghouse, the little bow wow in her wants
to bite back. Meanwhile, DJ plays buffer between a bickering
Stephanie and Kimmy. Hmmm great.

Speaker 2 (11:15):
I feel like the synopsis has gotten more descriptive.

Speaker 1 (11:20):
Well, metaphors we have, Like, I feel like the whatever.

Speaker 2 (11:25):
Ai we chose to do that has like really upped
its game.

Speaker 1 (11:29):
It's like it's around on im yeh right.

Speaker 2 (11:33):
Let me have a little theme in here of dogs
and yeah, yeah, no, it is getting a little bow
wow in her wants wants to bite back.

Speaker 1 (11:41):
Yeah. If this was a creative writing exercise, I would
give it an a absolutely yes. This episode was directed
by Joels Wick it was written by Elias Davis, a
name that is not familiar, so let's blame Let's blame
him for all of the mister Dave.

Speaker 3 (12:00):
I'm sorry, sorry, David, mister Davis.

Speaker 1 (12:03):
We have a whole bunch of guest stars this week,
fabulous guest stars. Barkley returns as Little bow Wow Sparky.
He's the best, so kissed. We will see him one
more time after this, but not until.

Speaker 2 (12:16):
She almost made as many appearances as Debbie Gregory, except
the same character.

Speaker 1 (12:24):
He had more continuity than Debbie Grecchory.

Speaker 2 (12:28):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (12:28):
Then we have Anthony S. Johnson as Henry Taj's dad.
And this is another actor who did a ton of
guest appearances in the day. He was on Buffy the
Vampire Slayer, Married with Children, Murder. She wrote just all
of the all of the top hits of the day.
Then we have Virginia Watson as joe Anne the Mom,

(12:51):
and she too did a lot of guest appearances. She
was on Matt Locke Home Improvement and Parker Lewis Can't
Lose I remember that show. Thought about that show.

Speaker 2 (13:02):
Right.

Speaker 1 (13:05):
Then we have Tamara Mowray Howsley. That's a lot of
that's a lot of syllables in my in my mouth. Finally,
this is it. We got all three Mowriy siblings on
the show this week, which is fantastic. Obviously technically only two.
You're right, they're playing the same character. I think it's

(13:26):
just one of them. That's not They're only in one scene.
I don't think they're both credited, So yeah, who I
wonder which one it is. I don't mytory. It was
weird to see like twins playing the role of what
ten year old fifteen year old? I don't know how
old she was in this episode, but it was like, yeah,
usually that's reserved for toddlers, but no, this time they
had teenage teenage twins. Anyways, best known for the hit

(13:49):
TV series Sister Sister with her twin sister Tia. She
also played doctor Kayla Thornton on the TV series Strong Medicine,
and she has an impressive list of Christmas movies and
mystery movies with Lifetime and Hallmark and then Tia is
also credited for the role of Denise. She along with
Sister Sister, she did one hundred episodes of a TV

(14:11):
series called The Game, which is a spin off of Girlfriends.
They did one hundred episodes. Yeah, I'm like, how do
I never read this show? Yeah, it's fantastic. And then
she did twenty sixty five episodes of a Nickelodeon series
called Instant Mom in twenty thirteen. I have heard of
that one, okay. And then she too has a lot
of Christmas movie credits to her name. Fantastic, I love it.

(14:34):
The Mowory's the Mowerys are on the set this week. Yes,
they are fantastic.

Speaker 2 (14:39):
We have Taught and Tamara were there though, because they
were like my age and so you could hang out.

Speaker 1 (14:44):
They were always around. That's right, That's so cool. And
I do wish I knew which one was playing the
role of Denise. I know I do too. An they're
birth credited. How does that work with twins? Do they
both get paid or do they split the fee? Like,
I don't know how this works when you're like, you
have to pay both of them, but are they getting

(15:07):
the same amount of pay as if it was just
one of them and then you have to split it
or I have so many questions about this. I never
thought about this until right now. Hmm. Idea, did they
have to pay the Olsen twins for the two other
roles that they played this week, the Devil and the
Good Michelle and the Bad Michelle. Did they get extra? Right?

(15:29):
You got for that too, because I think technically you're
supposed to get paid if you do a different perform
if you do a different character, you have to get paid.

Speaker 3 (15:38):
I don't think so, no, those in a series.

Speaker 1 (15:42):
Oh I thought no, because I think it would be
because it's it's you're like, you're under contract to do
whatever they write in the script.

Speaker 2 (15:50):
Oh, so you they should have had I have.

Speaker 1 (15:53):
Just three actors playing all of the full house cast,
like completely, you know, like how we did the Secret
Admirer episode on how Rude Tanner.

Speaker 3 (16:02):
Exactly, just us playing everything.

Speaker 1 (16:05):
Hey, you know what, that's that's a bargain right there.
They should have just hired us to do it all. Yeah. Anyways,
So Tas is back as Teddy, Darlene Vogel returns as
Wendy Tanner, and Journey Smolette is credited in this episode,
even though she wasn't in it, so I don't know credit.

(16:25):
We've got people credited that are in it. We got
people that aren't credited who are it's you know, the
only thing. The only consistency is Barkley. Really, Barkley is
the only kids.

Speaker 3 (16:35):
He's the He's the one thread that runs throughout all of.

Speaker 1 (16:38):
Full House, right, yeah, he is. I love that little
Love that little guy, Love that Amphibian, Love that Amphibian.
We start with the teaser in DJ's room. Michelle walks
in with a kid's portable speaker and microphone and she announces,
guess what time it is. DJ is typing away at
her computer and shrugs four thirty, and Michelle exclaims, Nope,

(17:00):
it's time for the Michelle Show, and she starts singing
her made up theme song.

Speaker 3 (17:04):
This is very meta, right yeah, I'm like, yes it is.

Speaker 1 (17:09):
At first, I was like, oh, that's funny how she
said this is the Michelle Show. And I'm like, oh no,
she really meant it, Like she really meant that. Oh boy.
DJ admits she loves that show, but she has the
homework show to do right now. Michelle completely ignores her,
and she continues, My first guest is Yogi Bear, and

(17:29):
she does her Yogi Bear impression and says, I'm smarter
than your average bear. DJ gives a monotone response, terrific
show one of your best. Then Michelle puts the mic
right in front of DJ and shouts here's DJ. DJ
reminds her that she doesn't do impressions, but Michelle is insistent.
She repeats once more. Here's DJ. DJ reluctantly deepens her

(17:53):
voice and says, I'm George Washington. I was your very
first president. How's it going?

Speaker 2 (17:59):
Always a good idea to pick an impression that no
one can verify.

Speaker 1 (18:03):
No one's heard it, right, that's actually kind of brilliant.

Speaker 2 (18:06):
Might yeah, you be like, I'm gonna do an impression
of Ben Franklin. It may or may not sound like
him at all, but you don't know. Yeah, you can
just be emphatic about it. It's like, no, this is
what he sounds like. Hear him, just a really weird
high voice, and be like, that's what I heard.

Speaker 3 (18:21):
He sounded like like Abraham Lincoln. Apparently Abraham Lincoln had
a very strange voice.

Speaker 1 (18:25):
H really, I did not know that. Yeah, okay, well
I'll have to take your word for it because I
have no way to prove that. So Michelle is impressed
with this impression. Wow, you sound just like him, And
on that note, she closes the show and sings the
theme song while exiting DJ's room. Once she gets to
the doorway, she turns around and throws her hand up

(18:47):
in the air, exclaiming, Michelle, all, I think, though, when when.

Speaker 2 (18:53):
There's a moment of flinging and doing a whole thing,
all I can picture is Adria right off camera doing that.

Speaker 1 (19:00):
Oh yeah, yeah, you know what I mean.

Speaker 2 (19:02):
That's all I picture is Adrian going okay, very and Michelle.

Speaker 1 (19:08):
Yeah, it's true. Sometimes sometimes she'll the Mary Kate or
Ashley will say something and I'm like, oh, that sounds
just yeah, for sure. I have many of those moments.
I can literally hear Adria say the lines hysterical. And
I'm fascinated by the evolution of Candace's bangs at this
point in the series, where she's growing them out and

(19:30):
they're going are they are they long side sweat banks?
Were long side sweat banks. And I remember it was
so jealous of how long he were, and I was like,
I was always jealous of her hair. Oh yeah, best hair,
tons of it. Well, you're still in the You're still
in the spiderweb bang era with your little spider banks.

Speaker 2 (19:49):
It's it's like a puff of cotton candy on my head.

Speaker 1 (19:52):
It's adorable, but it fits. It frames your face nicely.
I think it's adorable. It's very cute. You're just trying
to make me feel better because I'm in a bad mood.

Speaker 3 (19:59):
But they I appreciate it.

Speaker 1 (20:01):
No, I would say that. No, it was easy.

Speaker 2 (20:04):
We're moving from like the very eighties sort of the
rounded teased moment.

Speaker 1 (20:10):
Yeah, yes, we're moving away from the AquaNet, the big
round brush era and into the side swept bangs era.
So it's yeah, it's fascinating to watch them get longer
and longer as the series goes on. Next, in Jesse's studio,
Jesse is working on his music when Teddy and Michelle
come running down the stairs. Teddy shouts, here's uncle Jesse,

(20:32):
and Michelle chimes in, we've been looking for you everywhere.
Jesse asks why, and Michelle matter of factly states, because
that's how you find somebody silly like Jesse is so
put out by this whole Like he's right, so annoyed
at being disrupted by these Well, yeah, what do you want?
But why why are you looking for me? What point

(20:53):
I get to get to it? Jesse emphasizes that he
has a lot of work to do, and he tells
the Muncskins to hit the yellow brick road. He continues
to play a drum beat on his high tech machine,
and Teddy looks at him with surprise. Where did that
drum come from? Jesse points to the machine and explains
he's got a whole band here. This is such new technology.

Speaker 2 (21:15):
Oh yeah, this was like drums without a drum what yeah,
Like it seems.

Speaker 1 (21:22):
So old now, but at the time, it's like, oh yeah,
this was just top notch technology right here. So first
he hits the drums, then he adds the bass and
a little guitar. Teddy and Michelle are watching and their
jaws are dropped. Finally, Jesse adds some horns and an
Elvis voice to the end of it. Michelle proclaims, we

(21:45):
have got to play with that, and she and Teddy
start to reach for the drum machine, but Jesse quickly
yells freeze hands up. They oblige and show him their
empty hands. He sternly tells them this is very expensive
equipment that I'm still making payments on, So under no
circumstance are you to touch anything in this whole entire studio.

Speaker 3 (22:06):
Can you imagine what the payments are for that all
that equipment.

Speaker 1 (22:08):
I'm impressed at their job. Yes, yes, first of all,
I'm there's a lot to unpack here. I'm glad. I
First of all, this is a rare mention of finances
on this show and how they pay for it. So yeah,
we actually do pay for things. Yeah, yes, this is
like the elephant in the room. How do they pay
for stuff? And okay, Jesse's financed this, Yes, the Sizer

(22:30):
thing got good credit. Yeah, and I'm very proud that
Danny didn't just finance the whole thing because you think, oh, well,
he redid the basement for Joey and then he just
redid the basement for the recording studio.

Speaker 2 (22:40):
Well maybe maybe Danny's the bank. Maybe he borrowed the
money from Danny. You know what I mean, he's paying
him back.

Speaker 1 (22:45):
Oh yeah, that would make that would make sense. Yeah,
a little no interest loan. Yeah yeah, Well, Jesse, Danny's a.

Speaker 2 (22:53):
Loan shark and he charges him a ridiculously high interest
loan and if he doesn't pay him back, it's gonna
go really poorly.

Speaker 1 (23:01):
Oh gosh, like this is the this is I want?
How does Danny make all his money. He's a lone shark.
He's just a shark. I love it. Uh So, Michelle smirks,
my feet are touching the floor, and Teddy grins, she's
got you there. Jesse tries to show them along, but

(23:21):
Michelle insists that he stopped working because it's Saturday. Teddy nods,
telling him to get some fresh air. Jesse huffs, I'd
love to put on my play clothes and hit the
sandbox with you. Bozo's with the good Uncle Jesse keep saying,
be responsible, finish your work, and then go out and
enjoy some well earned relaxation.

Speaker 3 (23:40):
It's good to know there's a good Uncle Jesse in there.

Speaker 1 (23:42):
I like that, Yes, I was. I'm very pleased with
everything that I'm here. He's financing things, he's got good
I'm an adult. Yeah, yes, But Michelle admits that the
good Uncle Jesse is a nerd. Come on, Michelle, let's
encourage the good behavior, right. Jesse tries to tell them
that he is still hip, but the bad Uncle Jesse

(24:04):
keeps trying to take over, saying work is for chumps.
Go out and party. You're having a good hair day,
go share it with the world. And Teddy thinks the
bad uncle Jesse sounds cool. But Jesse is trying to
teach them a lesson. You need to know right from wrong,
so he's determined to sit there and finish his work. Unsurprisingly,
he does a one to eighty right after his speech

(24:25):
and happily shouts starting tomorrow, who wants ice cream? And
he chases the kids out of the studio. Okay, it's
a good too set up.

Speaker 2 (24:34):
Yeah, it's a set up for the weirdness that we
finally acknowledged that there is a basement full of expensive
equipment here.

Speaker 1 (24:41):
Yes, and it's expensive, and they don't want all these kids.

Speaker 2 (24:45):
It's expensive, and they already put all this crap in
the attic and then they had to.

Speaker 1 (24:49):
Move it down. They had to get a crane. He's
going to do it.

Speaker 2 (24:53):
You can't carry it on the stairs.

Speaker 1 (24:57):
It's a narrow stairway. There's alway, you know. It's this, Yeah,
this is no nobody should be allowed in the recording
studio except Jesse and occasionally one hundred rippers. So next
in DJ's room, Kimmy, DJ and Steph walk into the
room carrying shopping bags, and Kimmy and Steph are in
the middle of a heated argument regarding Timmy Finelli and

(25:19):
Jimmy Finelli, in which one of them is cuter. DJ
butts in what are you guys arguing about? They're identical twins.
Kimmy defends her choice. Jimmy is two minutes older, he's
much more mature. And we came in hot into the seat,
like this argument was already very intense, like from the jump,
I feel like that was a note that we got

(25:41):
that's like, no, no, you got to raise, got to
raise it. Just come in like at a ten, coming
at a five, come in at a ten. Well, because
we've already been arguing, we've been arguings.

Speaker 2 (25:51):
Yeah, oh yeah, but Timmy and Jimmy is the is
the the issue right now at hands? And then you
just wouldn't shut up about it, the whole shut up it.

Speaker 1 (26:00):
And we are steadfast in our opinions. Nobody's budgeting on this, nobody.
So Steph rolls her eyes. That is the dumbest thing
I've ever heard, and Kimmy scoffs. Let me get this straight.
You're calling me dumb, and Steph retorts gibbler, You're so dumb,
you don't know how dumb you are, Kimmy tries to

(26:21):
one up her. You're the one who's dumb capital d
u M dumb. Oh boy, here we go. Yeah, DJ
vince's and reminds her Kimmy, there's a bee, and Kimmy
starts to swap the air and frantically asks where I
hate those things? This was actually very funny. It was funny,

(26:42):
h DJ size, I think we have a winner. Steph
turns to her older sister and questions, how can you
be friends with that? Wow? It's harsh. That looks kind
of harsh, Like I am a human, I'm Adreid, a
weird human at a little bit that didn't hurt a little,
But that's okay. Kimmy doesn't back down. She picked me,

(27:04):
but she got stuck with you. DJ is fed up.
You guys have been arguing the whole way home, and
sure enough the girls start to argue about where they
started arguing, on Lake Street or Chestnut.

Speaker 2 (27:17):
This is just like siblings, Like this sounds exactly like
my kids.

Speaker 1 (27:21):
Yeah, but you're like, does it matter? No, I just
want to fight, doesn't just doesn't just want to argue, yes,
which I'm non confrontational, so I don't like, I don't
want to argue when I have to argue, I definitely
don't want to make up arguments goodness, so DJ can't
believe them. She insists that they shake hands and be friends,

(27:44):
so Kimmy stretches out of hand, but when Steph reaches
for it, Jimmy swipes it away. Ah, got you a
shrimp boat, and Stephanie scowls bird legs DJ's had it.
She shuts the door and says they aren't leaving until
they start acting nice to one another. I would have
kicked them both out, yeah, Why why is she keep

(28:04):
them into the Saint? Right? If anything, DJ should DJ
should leave and lock those guys work it out. Yeah, right.

Speaker 2 (28:11):
And also I feel like any older sibling would have
immediately kicked out the younger sibling and been like, oh
my god, leave me with my friend.

Speaker 1 (28:17):
You're so annoying. Totally totally yes, this was. I mean, like,
I get it. The jokes gotta work, that storylines gotta work,
but not realistic. Uh So Steph rolls her eyes and
says fine, and then starts dialing a phone number on
DJ's phone. DJ asks what she's doing, and Steph responds
I'm ordering pizza. This could take months, give me argues years,

(28:40):
and they go back and forth on how long this
will take. I feel like we were adding some of
that at the end. At the end was just and
I kept thinking, I hope they cut soon because I'm
running out.

Speaker 2 (28:54):
I don't know, I don't know how many Kennedies I
can go, right.

Speaker 1 (29:00):
And I'm so distracted. Speaking of bangs, I'm very distracted
by my bangs here, which resemble an owl pellet. It's
just like this stuffed an owl pellet. Yeah, it's like
this net. It's like a part nest, part bones, part
I don't know. Yeah, it's gross, Like it doesn't even
look like hair. It's just a mess of b like
a owl on my face.

Speaker 2 (29:21):
I'm trying to even remember what your hair looked like
in that scene, and I don't. I don't particularly remember
a problem with it, and usually I'm.

Speaker 1 (29:28):
Pretty usually right. No, this is when I was I
remember distinctly when I was in this side that it's
like the tuft. It was just like the like the
pepper hair and yeah, yeah, yeah, And so I don't know,
as much as I want to blame the hair department

(29:50):
for this, this might have been me.

Speaker 2 (29:51):
This might have been me been like, I don't think
I don't think this was you. You were never like that.

Speaker 1 (29:57):
I was never You're right, I never spoke up. You
never were like I want this.

Speaker 2 (30:01):
You were like okay, which I understand because I was
the same way.

Speaker 1 (30:05):
And then I'd go in my dressing room be like
I hate it right right, Okay, So I will blame
the hair department for this owl pellet bangs? Okay? An
owl pellet?

Speaker 2 (30:15):
Yes, it's like they call it an owl pellet to
like owl poop or something.

Speaker 1 (30:21):
No, it's the little thing that they vomit. Did you
never dissect one in school? An owl? No? An owl pellet.
It's the thing they vomit like they eat and then
they vomit something up and it's got like twigs and
material like whatever they've ingested. It's got fur, it's gotten
Never heard of this, and I know a lot of
random things. I I know. How have you never dissected

(30:44):
an owl pellet? I mean I had dissected a fetal pig.

Speaker 2 (30:48):
Anyway, this is anatomy and physiology we had to do.

Speaker 1 (30:51):
Have you done a frog? Yeah? Okay? Frogs? Yes? Dicted
owl pellets like salamanders, maybe lots, reptiles, amphibians, maybe I don't.

Speaker 2 (31:01):
Know, poor poor little things anyway, Okay, anyways, let's not
get distracted about what we've dissected.

Speaker 3 (31:08):
Sorry, everyone, He's really sorry for that.

Speaker 1 (31:11):
Next in the kitchen, Joey hops down the stairs wearing
a colorful tracksuit while singing, Oh what a beautiful mourning
from the musical Oklahoma.

Speaker 2 (31:22):
He looks like that woman in in those dance videos,
the how to dance videos. That's like the whitest white
woman you've ever seen trying to explain hip hop dancing,
and she's in She's in a full like blue tracksuit,
just like that.

Speaker 1 (31:38):
That's what Joey writes.

Speaker 2 (31:41):
I was expecting him to start like doing the you know,
like and jazz.

Speaker 1 (31:47):
You're like, oh my god, don't ever do that, lady. Yeah, like,
this is the worst possible candidate to explain hip hop, right, Yeah,
that's hysterical. Yeah, Dave is a vision. Yeah, it's the.

Speaker 2 (32:00):
Second noisiest material next to car Quarterbay.

Speaker 1 (32:03):
Yes, the sound guys like you're wearing a paper bag.
Move as gently as possible. The sound guys are gonna
get mad, and so Dave's he ends the song with
a flourish. This thing he would always do regardless if
we were real loud singer guy. Yeah, where he dramatically
like pulls the imaginary microphone away from his mouth and

(32:25):
he goes silent, and then he hits the final note
and brings it right back in. Dave, he loved that
bit on Cue the doorbell rings and he excitedly tells
Danny and Becky that he's going on a bike ride
with Wendy. Wendy's back. This is a two episode arc.
I'm impressed, very impressed. I like this relationship. I wish

(32:46):
this wasn't the end of it. I was like, well,
don't get your hopes one. Danny notes, ever since my
sister moved back to San Francisco, you've been walking around
the house singing show tunes, and Joey insists that's not true,
before he heads towards the door singing seventy six troum
Bones from Music Man in the living Room. Danny follows

(33:07):
behind Joey, and he does not sugarcoat things. I hope
you know what you're getting yourself into. My sister is
a pretty serious athlete, and you're not exactly in tiptop shape.
It's still always so funny to me that Dave, the
most athletic of who plays hockey every weekend, was the
one that was always like, you're not athletic, right, I know? Yeah?
They they yes, Dave's only three of them, and they

(33:32):
kept yeah, making him out to be. It's this doufish.
Joey explains that he knows that Wendy likes him for
who he is and doesn't need to do anything special
to impress her. However, as soon as Danny opens the door,
Joey jumps to the ground and does push ups while
counting one hundred and eighty one, one hundred and eighty two,

(33:53):
and he stands up to greet Wendy. He tells her
he's doing an early morning pump up. He says he's
working on his abs, pecks and lobes. Wendy laughs, you're
working out your ears, and Joey nods, yep, feel the
definition in these babies, and he flexes as hard as
he can. Wendy admits she loves a man with ears

(34:13):
of steel, and Danny sarcastically chimes in, and his brain
is one big ball of aluminum foil. Joey claps his
hands together. Eager to leave. He tells Wendy they can
put their bikes on her rack and head out. But
Wendy doesn't have a bike rack. She doesn't even have
a car. Joey lets out a nervous laugh. The trails

(34:35):
twenty miles away. How are we going to get there?
And Wendy casually says, ride our bikes through the hills
of San Francisco, right, Yeah, this is ambitious.

Speaker 2 (34:45):
It's not a Yeah, that's not a regular twenty miles,
that's a San Francisco up and down twenty miles.

Speaker 1 (34:49):
No, that's an endurance sport, because that's an ultra marathon
right there. Uh so, Joey is now visibly worried. Sure,
the twenty mile ride there will be a nice warm
up and the twenty mile ride back will be a
nice little cool down. Danny butts in with amusement. Especially
for a guy who can do one hundred and eighty
push ups without breaking a sweat, Danny's just roasted him

(35:12):
this whole time. Joey boasts that he's in tiptop writing condition.
But when he goes to grab his bike, we see
that it's very old fashioned and has a banana seat
straight out as stranger things. Yeah, this was the eighties bike.

Speaker 3 (35:27):
Oh god, I remember those things.

Speaker 2 (35:28):
Yes, they have a little metal thing on the back
that you'd like stand on the pegs and hold on to.

Speaker 1 (35:33):
Oh yeah yeah, and they like they would rust overnight.
And yeah, it's instant rusting. He loved it.

Speaker 2 (35:42):
Yeah, you definitely needed a Tetnis shot anytime you've actually
rode one.

Speaker 1 (35:46):
Of those, Oh for sure, yes, yes. So Wendy is
shocked to see that this is the bike that he'll
be using, but Joey assures her, Oh, all the top
riders are going back to the banana seat.

Speaker 3 (36:00):
That's more surface area. I think it's more comfortable.

Speaker 1 (36:04):
I would think so too, Like, don't dog a banana seat,
you know that's probably got some good patting in there.
I don't know, I'm not My brain is going so
many directions right now, but I'm continuing on banana seat
and padding.

Speaker 3 (36:19):
I'm just I'm like, oh, hold on overload.

Speaker 1 (36:23):
Next, in Jesse's studio, we see Michelle tiptoeing down the
stairs and she asks if anyone is there. No one answers,
so the coast is clear. She walks up to Jesse's
sound machine, and she's tempted to play with it, but
as soon as she's about to touch it, another Michelle,
in a puffy pink dress with long curly hair and

(36:44):
a flower crown appears.

Speaker 2 (36:47):
I mean.

Speaker 1 (36:50):
As this wasn't just one does? Yeah, So she scolds
her Michelle Elizabeth Tanner, I am shocked. Michelle is astonished
and asks the look alike, who are your means? Sport?

Speaker 3 (37:05):
Child's having some sort of a mental break.

Speaker 1 (37:08):
She's well, and as a therapist, you think she would understand,
like why she's having this swell. Yeah, but you know
what break from reality?

Speaker 3 (37:15):
You don't know when you're in it.

Speaker 2 (37:17):
That's true when she's too close to it, like dumb
people don't know they' dumb.

Speaker 1 (37:23):
They don't know. You're right, they don't know. That's what
what bliss man ignorance really is. It really is, Scott.
I wish That's why I'm so unhappy. You need to
be more ignorant. I could get a lobotomy. I think
I think i'd feel bad. So the girl explains, I'm
the good Michelle. I tell you the right thing to do.

(37:45):
Just then another Michelle appears to Michelle, not another Michelle.
This one's wearing a bandana, a leather jacket, and long
ear rings. She warns Michelle, don't listen to that wimp.
Michelle realized says that that is the bad Michelle, and
the good one begs her not to fall for her trap.

(38:05):
The bad one wants her to break the rules, but
the real Michelle doesn't want to get in trouble. It's
not coincidence that bad Michelle looks exactly like Uncle Jesse,
like with the leather right, Well, she just I mean right,
that's I mean basically yeah, it's like, you know, it's.

Speaker 2 (38:24):
Shopping and she came back in with the glasses in
the little leather jacket.

Speaker 1 (38:27):
She just get jacket. It's super Yeah, she repurposed it
for her for her face or break right, it's so funny.
So she calls her a chicken and flaps her arms,
and Michelle is obviously conflicted. So the good Michelle shakes
her finger and repeats, be good oh. In response, the
bad Michelle chance party, Party, Party. Michelle tells both of

(38:52):
the other Michelles to stop. She makes her decision and
announces it's party time. She goes haywire, pressing every button
on every piece of equipment. The bad. Michelle dances along
and shouts you're bad to the bone. On cue. Jesse
walks downstairs and both of the pretend Michell's quickly disappear.

(39:13):
Jesse asks his niece what she's doing is having a
mental episode? Yeah, he should be alarmed, He should totally
for several reasons he should be alarmed. Michelle begs Jesse
not to tell her dad because she'll get in trouble,
and then Danny runs downstairs and asks if everything's okay? Well,
but come on, it's like, when is anything okay in

(39:39):
this house?

Speaker 2 (39:40):
You're either totally alone and nobody can hear you, or
you do the slightest thing and someone comes running in right.

Speaker 1 (39:46):
Like everyone right, and you're like, how did you not
hear the other.

Speaker 3 (39:51):
Stuff that was going on last episode?

Speaker 2 (39:53):
Right?

Speaker 1 (39:54):
Right? No, it's it's like, just I'd love to sitcoms
in this house. It must be incredible. So Michelle calmly
responds everything is super, but Jesse tells the truth, No,
everything is not super. She was down here playing with
my stuff after I specifically told her not to. Danny

(40:15):
turns to Michelle and asks if that's the truth, and
she plays it off. Hey, I was just having fun,
Danny reprimands her, Well, your fun is over for the
rest of the day. You're going to be in your
room and no TV. Sheelle asks if she can rent
a videotape. You see back in the day, guys, you
had to go to a different location and borrow a

(40:39):
VHS tape. You could have for about three days, and
then you had to rewind it and turn it back in. Yes,
that was the best. That was the best Friday nights
at Blockbuster down in front of the wall, right elbow
or whatever the hell was the big Blockbusters, like, I
got it, I got it? Yeah, I know that was
I missed those days. Uh so, Danny sternly responds, no tapes,

(41:04):
no cable, and no pay per view. Michelle can't believe
what she's hearing, but Danny reminds her that if she
breaks the rules, she's gonna be punished. Michelle looks at
Jesse and pouts, thanks a lot, Uncle tattletale. Jesse tells
her he is not a tattletale, and then he proceeds
to tell Danny what she just said. He realizes the hypocrisy,

(41:25):
but stands firm that it isn't his fault because she
was messing with his stuff. Michelle continues with the guilt trip.
I thought I was your little munchkin, but I was wrong.
Danny doesn't fall for it and prompts Michelle to go
up to her room. She looks at Jesse and sadly says,
I hope you're happy. Wof the sad music plays in

(41:46):
Jesse's sighs as she walks away. Darnott, Michelle like, and
now I'm mad at Michelle for making me feel bad
for Uncle Jesse. You know, like she's guilt tripping him.
You know, it's not tattletailing if he's telling right, Like
he said, don't play with my stuff. She played with
his stuff, so I told Dan, But.

Speaker 2 (42:05):
That's kids, Like any report is always a tattletale.

Speaker 1 (42:09):
You're like, no, but that's not Yeah, He's like, yeah, Yeah,
she's just I get it. She's you know, she's in
the moment. She's mad at him. She's she's like, look,
I was having a great time down here with my
two imaginary friends who are also me because I don't
really get out of the house. Yeah, she has to
imagine she was just excited that there was something to

(42:29):
play with, you know, right, No, yeah, that's that. That
just hit me that when you said that, is that? Yeah?
She even her imaginary friends. Yeah yeah, un back there.
Yeah yeah, not even like an imaginary friend, that's like

(42:50):
something else. Yeah no, it's just different for you. Yeah. Wow,
that's the Narcissism just runs very deep in this family.
So up in Michelle's room, Michelle is sitting on the
bed petting Comet, and she sighs, at least I've still

(43:13):
got you, Commet, put it on cue. Danny yells out
for comment, saying it's time for his walk, and so
Commet jumps out of the bed and doesn't look back.
So true. They don't care. They're like, I love you.
Wait a treat. Okay. Now Michelle is all alone and
totally bummed. The good Michelle reappears to her right and
scolds her, I hope you learned your lesson, and then

(43:36):
bad Michelle appears to her left and tries to show
off the good one. Hey, princess, go kiss the frog.
Michelle angrily reminds her that she's the one responsible for
this mess.

Speaker 3 (43:47):
God, she's having just a full identity crisis.

Speaker 1 (43:49):
She really is, like she's blaming. This is a lot.
There's a lot going on right now. Uh, it's a
bad Michelle decides to push all the blame onto Uncle Tattletale,
but then she proposes an idea. You want to make
him very sorry. The Good Michelle knows something's up and

(44:12):
tells Bad Michelle to mind her own business. Light the
studio on fire. No, sorry, not a good idea. That
wouldn't make him very sorry, though it would. The bad one, Uh,
the bad No, The real Michelle is interested to hear
what this plan is, so the bad one suggests you
run away from home. Good Michelle gasps at the thought.

(44:34):
Bad Michelle insists Uncle Jesse will never squeal on you again.
So the real Michelle nods, sounds good to me. I'm
out of here. She hops off the bed and grabs
the world's smallest suitcase to begin packing. Good Michelle tries
to convince her otherwise while she loads up the suitcase
with all of her clothes. At the same time, Bad
Michelle is shouting, don't listen to her pack that suitcase.

(44:57):
The two figments of her imagination start to argue back
and forth, and Bad Michelle taunts the good one, yelling
the good. Michelle just stares at her in utter disgust
going through this is. This has become the Michelle Show
in a matter of ten minutes.

Speaker 2 (45:13):
Like it literally well they she came in and said
it's the Michelle Show.

Speaker 1 (45:18):
She wasn't lying time, right, we were. We were amply warned. Wow,
this is a lot of Michelle's. This is too many Michelle,
this is This is a lot of Michelle's.

Speaker 2 (45:31):
But I'm just glad that they're not freakishly large like
they were in that one dream sequence from like t
take at least normal sized to Michelle's.

Speaker 1 (45:42):
Okay, yeah, it's at least they're not creepy. I mean,
they're this hole set up is weird, but at least
they're not creepy large. They're not creepy, right, yeah, yeah,
okay is it? And I don't mean this in a
like I don't mean this in a mean.

Speaker 2 (45:56):
Way, but when when I see Michelle and it's Mary
Kate but in the the the princess thing with the
hair and the crown and the whatever. I'm trying to
think what it reminds me of. But there's some oh, Glinda,
is what it reminded me? No, you know when e
t is dressed up in the wig.

Speaker 1 (46:16):
And you can't know what I mean yet, you can't.

Speaker 2 (46:23):
Say they look like I'm just saying it was like
it's like the wig is so big and it looks so.

Speaker 1 (46:28):
Ridiculous, you know what I mean. And the dress is oversize,
it's like when she's got extensions like she's obviously wearing. It's. Yeah,
it looks like ET. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (46:45):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (46:46):
Or I was gonna say miss Piggy, but I thought
Eat was better. That's definitely the lesser offensive of the two.

Speaker 2 (46:52):
Yes, I yah one really yeah, And no, this has
nothing to do with with anyone looking like et. Mark
just dress up right, the whole ensemble, and I'm like,
where have I seen this look before? That's right Et,
when he's dressed up for Halloween or whatever.

Speaker 1 (47:12):
Oh my chest hurts, my chest shirts, Oh gosh, Yeah
that's you know, I think he nailed it. You definitely
nailed it. So next we are at Teddy's house. Teddy
has a house and a family. Teddy gets a set.
This is a monumentous is huge episode.

Speaker 2 (47:30):
You're really this set was for Sparky and like, well
we got to have some owners and we got some
people there.

Speaker 1 (47:35):
Yeah, yeah. Yeah, this is Sparky's like third or fourth appearance.
He deserves his own set by now he's put in
his time. So Teddy and his family are playing monopoly
when the doorbell rings. Teddy asks who is it? And
Michelle shouts through the door, it's Michelle Tanner. Do you
remember Do you remember this bit? It made the gag
reel how Taj couldn't get the timing right with saying

(47:57):
who is it? And then opening the door. He would
open the door and then say who is it? Right
to Michelle's face, And so I don't remember that. Oh
my god, I make the gagriel. I remember it because
I mean he was what eight years old or something,
so he didn't get it. It was like it's a
timing thing. So yeah, it was.

Speaker 2 (48:15):
A yeah, you got a question before you can actually
see who it is? Yes, exactly, ask the question before
you can answer it yourself.

Speaker 1 (48:22):
Yes. So Teddy opens the door and Michelle politely asks, Hi, Teddy,
can I live with you? He shrugs, sure, come on in.
He happily announces to his family, guess what Michelle is
going to live with us? Teddy's dad smartly asks if
Danny knows that she's here, and Michelle admits, no, when

(48:45):
you run away, you don't tell. So the parents ask
why she ran away and she explains to teach Uncle
taddletale a lesson. Teddy's sister, which is Taj's real life sister,
thinks that Michelle is super cute and asks her parents
if they can keep her, like it's a puppy or
something like, it's c.

Speaker 3 (49:05):
T break out the recent pieces.

Speaker 2 (49:16):
Oh accuracy, Yeah, Michelle phone home.

Speaker 1 (49:29):
Michelle grins, I am a fun girl, and Teddy's dad responds, well,
until we get this straightened out, you are welcome to
stay here, and she exclaims, thanks new dad, Thank god
for these parents, Like, I'm very imped The parents handle
this the only way you can, which is to be like, oh,
don't panic, right, but doesn't know where you are a

(49:52):
phone call. They didn't like, you know, harbor her as
a fugitive, like no, they were just like, there is
no no eating in a bedding at all. Oh, very
impressed with ted Like Teddy's parents, Thank god for there's
some normal person in the in this full house universe,
like the only normal people. So next, in the Tanner kitchen,

(50:14):
Jesse is holding a camcorder and Becky and Nicky are
about to Becky is holding Nicki and the twins are
about to hit a monumental step. It's the baby's first
time trying solid foods. However, instead of keeping focus on
his son, Jesse keeps pointing the camera to himself to
show off his reactions and his good hair day that tracks.

(50:37):
Becky starts with the strained bananas and the baby's not
a fan of it, so she tries another spoonful and
he keeps all of it in his mouth. She announces
it's a keeper. I remember when they when I started
feeding the kids, they were like, start with peas, start
with something vegetable, because you start on the sweet stuff.
They're like, they're never going to like it. Yeah, we

(50:58):
started with avocados because avocados are plentiful here in this
part of the world. And uh, yeah, it's something. The
kids loved it. It's oh, I love having avocado. It's
a great little.

Speaker 2 (51:08):
But when you give him that first bite of like
a vegetable and they're.

Speaker 1 (51:12):
Like, like, oh, what is this? The face is the
master so great? Her face whatsoever? Was like this is terrible.
So then Danny comes running down the stairs and he asks,
have you guys seen Michelle. Jesse figures these adults in
the house, you know, hey, she was grounded and now

(51:35):
he can't find her. That's true, so Jesse figures she's
in her room because she's grounded, but Danny says no,
he can't find her anywhere, so he and Jesse both
start shouting her name as they search the house. Then
the phone rings and Danny's face washes over with relief.
He says, oh, thank god, We'll be right over and
he thanks Henry for the call. He hangs up with

(51:56):
the phone and he tells Jesse and Becky that Michelle
went down the street to Teddy's house. She ran away
from home. Becky can't believe that she would do such
a thing, but Jesse knows that she was mad at
him and called him Uncle taddle tail earlier. Jesse asks
what Danny's gonna do, and he responds, I'm gonna hug her,
kiss her, and then ground her for life. And that

(52:19):
sentence basically sums up all of full house.

Speaker 2 (52:21):
Like literally but well parenting really in a nut, like
I love you, Yes, I'm gonna hug you, kiss, and
now I'm gonna kill you.

Speaker 1 (52:32):
Yes. He starts to walk out the door, but Jesse
stops him. He says, I've got a better idea. Just
do what my dad did to me when I ran away.
I guarantee she'll never do it again, which sounded very ominous.
Like right, Nick, I was right? Where's he going with us? Right?

Speaker 3 (52:53):
Did he shove you in a suitcase?

Speaker 1 (52:55):
Like you? What did you do? This is a like
this is taking a dark but no. Next, in DJ's room,
DJ has forced Stephanie and Kimmy to sit in chairs
facing each other. The girls ask why they're doing this,
because it'll never work, but DJ argues, sure, sure it will.

(53:15):
I saw it on TV Little Sisters and best Friends
who hate each other on the next Giraldo. Stephanie is skeptical,
SoJ goes on to explain. The idea is you guys
can learn to be friends if you find that you
have things in common. Each time you agree, you move
your chairs closer together. When you disagree, you move your
chairs apart. Understand Steph rolls her eyes, we're not idiots,

(53:40):
and Kimmy frowns. Speak for yourself, and Steph just raises
an eyebrow in disbelief. DJ starts off by asking Stephanie
what her favorite book is, and she answers Charlotte's Webb.
Kimmy answers how to pick up Boys. Oh. Dj emphasizes
that they both read a book, but Kimmy says that
hers was a book on tape, so they move their

(54:01):
chairs away from each other. But books on tape or
is that still reading? Like? I am of the mindset
that if you listen to a book on tape, that's
still reading a book.

Speaker 2 (54:11):
I mean, I preferently read reading. Technically it's listening consuming
a book. Are you eating it?

Speaker 1 (54:18):
No, but you're digesting it mentally. You're mentally disting a book,
so you've you're listening to it, right, But that's not reading,
It's it's just semantics. No, listening involves your ears. Reading
involves your eyes.

Speaker 3 (54:36):
You can't listen with your eyeballs and read with your ears.

Speaker 1 (54:39):
Okay, So, if you're keeping track of the books you
read on good Reads, can you bark off the ones
the book the audiobooks that you've listened to.

Speaker 3 (54:48):
I don't listen to audiobooks, so I don't know, so
I would say, no.

Speaker 1 (54:52):
You can't count the audiobook. You can count the audiobooks
as books read or consu Well.

Speaker 2 (54:58):
You yes, that you have uh listened to all of
the words too.

Speaker 1 (55:05):
Okay, yeah, I don't think there's a It's it's good reads,
not good listens. But okay, that's that's fine. What good reads?
But you can't what's good reads? You can't can't choose.
Is it like where you get audiobooks. No, it's it's
just like a website where you can keep track of
It's like a social website, so you can see what
your friends are reading. You can read their reviews. It's

(55:26):
just a way of keep track of, like your to
to read list, what you're currently reading, and what you
have already read forget. Yeah, me too. One time I
was halfway through a Jodi Picole book and I was like, oh,
I've already bed. It was like two hundred pages in.
I do that with books with TV shows. This is
why we need good reads, whether you are an audiobook

(55:46):
listener or not. But anyways, okay, before we before we
get two hunder needs on this. Before DJ asks what
their favorite food is. Steph says pizza, and DJ gets excited,
considering Kimmy loves pizza. But Kimmy doesn't love it more
than trout, so they move their chairs farther apart. Stephanie

(56:08):
shakes her head, this is so stupid, and Kimmy agrees
it sure is. DJ points out that they both agree
that it's stupid, so they move their chairs closer together.
This time. DJ tells them to keep going. Steph complains
that she doesn't want to keep going and admits, you're
always telling me what to do, and Kimmy nods in agreement. Yeah,
she's so bossy. I'm sick of it. They agree once more,

(56:31):
so they inch their chairs even closer. They continue to
bond over their complaints about DJ. Kimmy says DJ is
always late and has to look perfect, and Steph calls
her the hair spray Queen.

Speaker 3 (56:44):
Which is saying a lot with my bangs right, yes, it's.

Speaker 1 (56:48):
Like okay, I get kettle ya. Kimmy admits, do you
know she's never complimented my hair, and Stephanie isn't say
right here either the owl pellet motif. DJ interrupts, well,
now that we're all friends, we can change the subject,

(57:09):
but Steph doesn't let up. Oh no, she has to
vent about her frustration with sharing a bathroom with DJ.
She tells Kimmy, might as well go to a Texico station.
Are you saying she's a slob or that she's a
steaks forever? It just take? Oh, it takes for take.

Speaker 2 (57:24):
Yeah, it got Oh she's in there forever. Might as
well just walk down the street to the gas station.

Speaker 1 (57:28):
So the Texico, Yeah you go, Okay, there you go.
Are there Texaco stations anymore? I don't think that's a thing. Well,
it's like just a gas station bathroom, right, is that? Yeah?
But Texico? I think God, I don't think tech. You know,
I think Texico. I think they went under a long
time ago. I don't know. I haven't I haven't even
thought about Texico since nineteen ninety two. Uh So Gimme
admits that they can go on for hours like this,

(57:50):
So she asks Steph do you like frozen yogurt? And
Steph nods love it. They bond over their shared love
of the strawberry flavor in particular, and they leave the room.
Jay scrambles after them, grabbing her coat as she yells, guys, wait,
I like yogurt too. This is the beginning of our
of our our our friendship Stephanie enemy ship. Yes, oh, yes,

(58:13):
we've been building as frenemies for a long time and
now we are. We're bonding as as she wolves. You know, yes,
it warms my cold black heart. It really does. Uh So.
Next at Teddy's house, Teddy and Michelle are playing Old
Maid on the couch. Well, Sparky lounges in Michelle's lap.

(58:34):
Michelle points to the card that she wants Teddy to grab,
and he does it without question, to no one's surprise.
It's the Old Maid card and this isn't his first
loss of the night, so Michelle lends him some advice,
don't play for money. Then she asks Teddy where she'll
be sleeping tonight, and he admits, we're out of beds.

(58:55):
You can sleep in the kitchen with Sparky. Michelle size, oh,
I used to have a dog. Those were the days.
Then the doorbell rings and Teddy's family walks in the
living room carrying Michelle's suitcase. Teddy's mom says that that
is her family. Michelle is confident that they've come to
say they're sorry. Teddy's mom lets Danny and Jesse inside,

(59:15):
but before Danny speaks to Michelle, Jesse reminds him to
stay strong and remember the plan. Michelle asks them, do
you have something to say to me? And Danny admits
he feels bad that she left home, and Michelle is
eager to hear more so, Jesse continues, we miss you
very much, munchkin, and Michelle questions, and you'll never be

(59:36):
uncle taddletail again. Jesse answers, well, I don't know how
I can. You don't live with us. This throws Michelle
off and she shouts I don't. Jesse continues, No, remember
you didn't like our rules. You want to live here,
that's cool. He points to the giant suitcase they brought
and says, here's some extra clothes, your toothbrush, and everything

(59:58):
you need. Michelle gasps, what is this a joke? Danny
shakes his head. Oh no, this is not a joke, Michelle.
There's nothing funny about running away from home. They both
kiss her forehead and say goodbye, and Jesse casually says,
if you need us, you know the number. Give us
a buzz. They start to walk out the door and
Michelle quickly shouts wait, you forgot something, and they ask what,

(01:00:23):
and she points to herself me. Danny asks if she
really wants to come back and live with them, Jesse
pipes up, even with Uncle taddletale, Michelle is sure of it.
She really wants to go home. The guys are happy
to hear this, and she gives them both a big hug.
They finally admit that they want her to come home too,
and they miss her a lot. Danny finally gets stern,

(01:00:47):
don't you ever do this again? You had us worried sick,
and Jesse adds it wasn't very smart. Michelle nods in agreement.
You're telling me I was going to sleep with the dog.

Speaker 3 (01:01:00):
She'd always check if there's room before you run away somewhere.

Speaker 1 (01:01:02):
Yeah, you really should, Yeah, absolutely. Next to Michelle's room,
Michelle runs in and shouts, my room, my bed, my pig,
I love this place. Jesse follows behind and tells her
it's time for one of their little talks. They take
a seat at the table and he says what you
did today was very wrong. Michelle knows she shouldn't have

(01:01:25):
touched his stuff, but Jesse's mainly talking about her running away.
He reminds her that was very dangerous. You're never to
leave this house without our permission. If you have a problem,
talk to me or someone else in this house, capiche,
and she nods capeche. Jesse asks why she actually ran away.
Michelle admits it's because he got her in trouble, and

(01:01:47):
Jesse insists, I felt terrible about getting you in trouble,
but I couldn't let you break the rules because if
you did it today, you would do it next time.
She wonders, am I still your little munchkin? And he
says yes, as long as she doesn't call him Uncle Tattletale.
She smiles, okay, Uncle Jesse. He asks that she never

(01:02:08):
ever run away again, and she promises, never ever, ever ever.
He asks her to shake on it, but instead of
shaking hands, they both do a little shimmy. They say
I love you and give each other a big hug
and a kiss. Jesse gets up to exit the room,
but Michelle has one more question. Were you really gonna
leave me at Teddy's? Jesse grabs the suitcase and opens it.

(01:02:29):
What do you think? And we see that it's totally empty.

Speaker 2 (01:02:32):
It's the world's oldest suitcase, right, he's very it's a
suitcase seventy three.

Speaker 1 (01:02:38):
Yeah. Michelle laughs and admits that was very sneaky Jesse
exits the room, and then Bad Michelle appears. She has
a devious look on her face and she says, I
got another good idea. The real Michelle does not want
to hear it, but Bad Michelle continues, let's sneak out

(01:02:59):
and watch oh MTV wraps. That was the thing. Oh yeah,
that was that was that was it back in the day.
The real Michelle wants her out of there, so she disappears,
but Michelle has to admit I like the way she dresses.
Just then, the good Michelle appears beside her and says,
I'm so proud of you. Remember to always do the

(01:03:21):
right thing. Michelle confidently responds I will, and with that,
the good Michelle disappears as well. Once once she's gone,
Michelle rolls her eyes. She can get on my nerves
and that's our show. That well, that was that I

(01:03:43):
did Michelle Michelle show. Indeed it was. I didn't like it.
I did not. I just I don't care for this episode.
Like the storyline. Don't love the best storyline. It's just
the stakes never felt high. I mean, yeah, I know
she ran away for home, but she ran to Teddy's
house per perhaps the most normal family on the block. Right,

(01:04:05):
that didn't even feel like high stakes. It was just like, okay,
they under a lesson sort of well, I mean.

Speaker 2 (01:04:12):
I guess you don't want to really like, you know,
have Michelle standing out there on the street corner of
San Francisco with a suitcase.

Speaker 1 (01:04:19):
True, it could get dark, very.

Speaker 2 (01:04:21):
That's that's less funny and more alarming.

Speaker 1 (01:04:25):
So it's definitely more alarming. Yeah, no, I get it
just wasn't. It didn't feel I don't know, it just didn't.
It didn't. It didn't didn't do it for me. Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:04:37):
And I don't even have a necessarily like a particular
reason that I was like, it just felt.

Speaker 3 (01:04:43):
It was one of those episodes that you were like, oh,
we just kind of threw this in there, and it's
a little filler, you know.

Speaker 2 (01:04:47):
I got to show that Michelle's you know, I don't know,
they was just seeing herself having a mental crisis.

Speaker 1 (01:04:54):
I don't know what we had to but like it
just felt I don't know, I'm left feeling satisfied. And
the three Michell's gimmick didn't work for me.

Speaker 2 (01:05:06):
If if it was five, I would have been much
better then. I think we just needed double the machine,
more Michells.

Speaker 1 (01:05:11):
Ye, we double the more Michelles, all of them. No.
I'm trying to figure out because I can usually suspend
disbelief to write, because I'm like, I love sitcoms, all
the silliness that comes along with sitcoms. But for some reason,
this this felt less believable than the shape shifting backyard
or you know, twenty five people living in the same house.

(01:05:34):
I don't know something about it just didn't feel I
don't know, I felt like they broke the laws of
physics or something. Well, we've been doing that for a
long time. We've been doing that for a long time. Yeah,
I don't know. It just didn't click for me. It wasn't. Uh,
it just wasn't. It wasn't It wasn't funny. It's not funny.

Speaker 3 (01:05:54):
It's not a really it wasn't a pretty funny one.

Speaker 2 (01:05:57):
No.

Speaker 1 (01:05:57):
And I think the kids, the kids are still too
young to carry an a storyline like this. It just
sort of emphasizes the stilted baby acting again, right, I
don't know. I think it was. It was better in
previous seasons when they would use Michelle sparingly and her
cuteness was more organic. So now I feel like they're

(01:06:18):
just forcing it. They're kind of so much Michelle, so
much Michelle, and they're kind of forcing the cuteness too. There.
It's like before she would just be cute organically, and
now she's it's written to be cute, whether it's actually
cute or not. And so I feel manipulated a little bit.
I feel like the writers are forcing this on us,

(01:06:39):
and I'm like, yeah, it's just too much. It's too much.
You need to dial it back a little bit.

Speaker 2 (01:06:44):
Yeah, it just it felt it felt like an unnecessary
reason to have both girls in the show, is what
it felt like.

Speaker 1 (01:06:52):
True, Yeah, very true. Yeah, it's the payoff wasn't worth
it for me. It didn't work for me. It's a
very forgettable episode. And didn't love our I mean, I
love our bits, but but it wasn't it wasn't my stakes.
It was just like well, and it.

Speaker 2 (01:07:08):
Also felt like DJ would have I felt like the
argument would have been almost better if DJ had I
don't know, somehow locked both of us out and then
we had to team up against her or you know
what I mean, like something like that rather than it didn't.

Speaker 1 (01:07:22):
Yeah, I don't know. I don't know. I don't even
know why.

Speaker 2 (01:07:25):
Like I said, I don't even know why it wasn't great,
but it just wasn't my favorite.

Speaker 1 (01:07:29):
This is the low point of season five for me
so far. This is my least favorite episode in several seasons.
This is my yeah, yeah, yeah, this is yeah, this
is It's a bad one. It's giving Howie vibes, you know,
it kind of is. Yeah, it's just too much of
a too much of a good thing, too much, Michelle.
You should use Michelle more sparingly. You just you just should. Sorry, Well, this.

Speaker 2 (01:07:55):
Was a thing we did, and an episode we saw,
there's just we saw Michelle dressed is et and Shell
dressed is Uncle Jes, Uncle Jesse.

Speaker 1 (01:08:09):
Yeah, it's a lot, it's yeah, do you have any
everywhere he looks though, sort of, And so I've noticed
in the girls room, Stephanie's bedspread is just this generic, blank,
solid navy color. And I'm glad you've graduated out of
your Peter Pan retting. You know, you're definitely maturing. But

(01:08:32):
I'm like, you can't have any sort of like bright
colors or like purple or something trendy. It's just navy
and that's it with mister Bear placed on there, and
I'm like, come on, set, it feels yeah, it feels
not well.

Speaker 2 (01:08:44):
Aren't we coming up on the redecorating of Stephan Michelle's
room soon?

Speaker 1 (01:08:47):
Oh? I forgot that that happens.

Speaker 2 (01:08:50):
Yes, maybe that's I think we're it's five or six.

Speaker 1 (01:08:56):
Oh isn't that Vicky's mom something like that? Yeah, yeah,
it does. The girl helps to redecorate or something like that.

Speaker 2 (01:09:03):
So maybe it's more season six or a couple of
but I do remember, I do feel like that's coming
up soon.

Speaker 1 (01:09:09):
So okay, So that would explain generic bedspread because it
did not seem it doesn't seem like Steph at all.
It doesn't. It doesn't seem like Steph.

Speaker 2 (01:09:16):
Yeah, Steph is I mean, look at my shirt, for
God's sakes, it's got three D things all over it.

Speaker 1 (01:09:22):
Sequence adorable, Yeah, very cute, plain navy sort of one.
Did you have any everywhere he looks, I did not.
I did not. This episode was just one big fact.
I just be honest, everywhere I.

Speaker 2 (01:09:32):
Looked it was just Michelle, and I was like, wow,
I don't there's more.

Speaker 1 (01:09:36):
You know, I never need to see this episode again. No, No,
mere people I know.

Speaker 2 (01:09:40):
Sorry, guys, all right, what if there's anyone out there
who's like, this is my favorite episode.

Speaker 1 (01:09:46):
I don't know, man, there's fan Ritos that love the
Howie episode and the like it's the kids are so cute.
I'm like, yeah, the kids are cute, but this is
stilted baby acting. They can be cute. I'm kidding. They
are cute, full stop cute, but they're not used in
the right way in this episode. Or no it was
a weird one. Yeah, well, thanks guys for listening to us.

Speaker 2 (01:10:08):
Uh, you know, ramble on and uh and rant and rave,
and it was your opinions.

Speaker 1 (01:10:14):
Did you love I hate this episode? You hate this episode?

Speaker 2 (01:10:17):
Is it a forgettable one for you fan of Rito's,
is it one that that you remember because it's so weird?
Or like, were you a kid that was Michelle's age
and you were like, oh my god, this is so cool.

Speaker 1 (01:10:28):
There's three of them, you know? Yeah, yeah, I know.
I would love to I would love to know. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:10:33):
Yeah, let us know, guys, And you can let us
know by following us on Instagram at how Rude Podcast,
or you can send us an email and let us
know at Howard Tana Ritos at gmail dot com. Uh yeah,
please leave comments, suggestions all the kind of stuff we
love it and you can visit our merch store Howard
Meerch dot com. And am I forgetting something?

Speaker 1 (01:10:54):
Nope? Thanks? Think you got it? Yeah, I think I did.

Speaker 2 (01:10:56):
I think I got it. Hello, everybody, Remember the world
is small. The house is full of Michelle, just all
different versions.

Speaker 1 (01:11:07):
Too much.

Speaker 3 (01:11:07):
There's the good one, the bad one, the nerdy one.

Speaker 1 (01:11:11):
This was a lot for the Olsens to carry like,
this was three different characters and that was at that's
too much. A lot of five year old Sorry, it
just is. Yeah, even two five year olds.

Speaker 2 (01:11:23):
It's a lot.

Speaker 1 (01:11:23):
Yeah, totally, I get it.

Speaker 2 (01:11:25):
Okay, everybody, the house is full of Michelle, so uh
be careful watch where you stay.