August 28, 2023 • 40 mins
Tiffany Haddish is one of the funniest people in Hollywood, but Paris is ready to find out how she became the Tiffany Haddish we know today.
If you think you and your friends are talented FBI agents when it comes to a new guy, Tiffany has you beat! Hear all about her extensive background check process and why it includes an “STD sniffing dog”.
Plus, Tiffany shares an emotional story from her early life that will make you shed a tear.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Wow, I a embarrassed.
Speaker 2 (00:10):
Hey everyone, I'm so excited for today's interview. I love
this woman so much. She is one of the funniest
person I've ever met in my life. No one makes
me laugh smile, I have the best time. She has
the biggest heart. She's beautiful inside and out. She's just
(00:32):
like alleged and an icon. She's an actress, she's a comedian,
she's a singer, she's a writer, she's an author, she's
a philanthropist, she's an advocate, she's a boss, and she's
a queen. Tiffany Hattish, Hey, she ready. Welcome Sis. I'm
(00:53):
so happy you're here. They love you. Oh my gosh,
she looks so cute next to you, a little crypto.
She got her haircut.
Speaker 1 (01:01):
And she's feeling fancy today. You feeling fat and.
Speaker 2 (01:05):
Si, she literally is like a different dog. Now. Her
hair was like so puffy, it was like this giant ball.
And then I was like, I want her to be
a teddy bear. And now she like walked in and
was so proud with the hair. You guys tell her,
she she knew.
Speaker 1 (01:18):
Look at my dog's like that too. I have like
a little Maltese Yorky mix, and when her hair is
all grown out, I feel like she has a bad attitude.
And then when I get her haircut, she's like, what up, eh,
I'm cute today, check me out. That is, she prancies
wags her booty like she don't even she normally just
wags her tail. But when she gets her haircut, booty
be movement and everything like look at me.
Speaker 2 (01:40):
I'm fine, Oh yeah, we're the same.
Speaker 1 (01:43):
Me too, I'm the same way.
Speaker 2 (01:45):
Dogs are like the owner, I feel like.
Speaker 1 (01:47):
They are they are they pick up your personality treats.
Speaker 2 (01:50):
I heard that certain every pet you have, like dogs especially,
are supposed to be with you, Like it's something like
in the cause, I don't know what you would call it,
but like supposedly like spiritually, like they come for like
a reason, like a specific person.
Speaker 1 (02:05):
I feel like my last dog came just to pee
all over my friends, just to make my house smell
like a nursing home. I think that's what she came for.
And then she she ran out into the street and
got hit by She got hit by a car. I'm
hurt by that, But then I'm like, well, you been
the smartest dog, and I learned to love even if
(02:25):
you're not smart. I love you anyways.
Speaker 2 (02:30):
And did you have any pets that you felt came
to for better reason?
Speaker 1 (02:35):
Yes, Sleeper that's the one that's I've had her for
fifteen years now, and she's the sweetest, kindest. I think
she came to me to protect me. And then Dreamer
that's my dog that passed away last year. She was
with me for fourteen years, and I believe she came
to me to just let me know who has STDs. Well, yes,
(02:58):
what I mean, yes, she let me know who have
She let me know what dudes to deal with and
what dudes not to deal with. What would she do?
She would like, okay, so if the dude came in
the house, she would walk up to him, immediately greet them.
She smiled like she's a blue nose piple, So she
got this big old smile, and then she instantly smell
their genitals, smell the genital area, smell their butt, and
(03:19):
then she would come over to me and she would sit.
And if she sat and just sat there and just
like kind of smiled, it's all good. But if she
sat there and she starts sneezing, I'm like, oh, he's sick.
What And would I would say something. I would be like,
when the last time you got to check up? When
it's the last time you went to the doctor. And
they would be like what what? And I'm like, look,
(03:40):
if we're gonna go, you definitely gotta go to the doctor.
And they would go and they would be having like
they would have stuff.
Speaker 2 (03:46):
Oh my god, she knew, she.
Speaker 1 (03:48):
Knew, she could smell it. She's an STD sniffing dog.
Speaker 2 (03:52):
Do you still have her?
Speaker 1 (03:53):
She died, She passed away. She passed away. She she
had cancer and she passed away fourteen years and she lived.
For people, that is a long life. That's good. I
was her girl. I think I talked to her. I
think I saw you like a month later, and I
was trying to be happy, but everywhere I was looking,
I was like, this is my dreamer. All my animals
(04:15):
are name after something that deals with rest, because that's
what I want more rest. So dreamer, sleeper, slumber, yep,
I gotta I got. I got a cat from a
job that I did, and that cat, her name is
cat Tonic. And we moved to a new house and yeah,
she decided to be for the streets. She no longer
(04:37):
wanted to live with me. She see me, she come
by and visit me, but she don't want to live
with me no more because she for the streets now.
And I got another cat and his name is a
boy cat is my first male animal in a long time.
And his name is Sleepy black Man because he all
black and he got out the house last night. I
was walking around the neighborhood this morning. Come on, Sleepy
(04:59):
black Man and Sleepy black Man. My neighbors were very confused.
I was very confused. It's like, why is she walking
around screaming Sleepy black Man. And then some of them
came out and asked me why am I doing that?
And I was like, I can't find my cat, and
I show them picture. Now they are the whole neighborhood
looking for Sleepy black Man. So hopefully by the time
I get home, Sleepy black Man be found.
Speaker 2 (05:20):
Oh my god.
Speaker 1 (05:21):
Well, but he probably a cats so he probably just
hanging out in the tree watching me walk around calling
for him, laughing at me. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (05:30):
I have a cat named Kutti and she gets out
all the time too, And it's up here, there's so
many coyotes, so I get so scared right now.
Speaker 1 (05:38):
There's no coyote. There's there are coyotes in the hood.
Like I live in South Central and there are coyotes occasionally.
They don't come down often, but when they do, then
I know there's no food up in the mountains. And
there's not even big mountains over there. You know, it's
like Ladera Heights because it's not that hi a mountain,
but we do occasionally get coyotes. That's not like I'm
looking for a boyfriend on it. But yeah, but you
(06:00):
got to see speaking into existence whatever it is you want.
Speaker 2 (06:03):
Do you have a boyfriend?
Speaker 1 (06:04):
I have associates.
Speaker 2 (06:07):
That's hot.
Speaker 1 (06:07):
I can't even look you in the eye because I
don't want to lie to you.
Speaker 2 (06:10):
Do Oh. I thought you were going to say like
you were in love or something, not yet.
Speaker 1 (06:16):
I'm I want to be I want to be in love,
but no, I got I date. I have friends.
Speaker 2 (06:22):
That's good. Yeah, it's hard in this town. It's very hard.
It was hard before fame, and it's hard after. It's harder.
Speaker 1 (06:30):
I feel like after, way harder after because you can't
have like a you know, we're not before fame. I
could have some you know, home moments I can't have
no home moments now whatever, because men love to gossip.
Back in the day, they would gossiping. Nobody knew who
they was talking about. Now they gossip, they'd be like, man,
you don't really know her. Man, you ain't show me
a picture of you are together, and they don't have none.
Speaker 2 (06:52):
Yes, I know. I'm so happy I finally found someone
I could trust, because in this town, especially if you're
in this business, everyone's like out to get something, or
they want to use you, or they just want the cloud,
or they just want to, I don't know, just do
so many duff things or sell stories about you. Yeah,
just like people are crazy. It's so annoying.
Speaker 1 (07:14):
I just why I don't let me get that close.
So this one guy I've been hanging out with, he's like,
why every time I come over here, you always have
me in the guest room. Why why can't go in
your room? I want to go in your room. I
was like, oh, no, no, no, no, you haven't earned main room privileges.
He's like, so we just got to hook up in
the guest room. I was like, yeah, you're a guest
you're not living here. You don't get main room privileges.
(07:37):
You know, when you pay a mortgage, then you can't
have some main room privilege. He was like, how much
is the mortgage? I told him how much mortgage was.
He was like, yeah, I'm cool with being in the
guest room. I'll be right here in the guest room.
Do you need me to walk the dog for you? You
need me to change your kid in litter? I can
do something around here. M h Yeah.
Speaker 2 (07:54):
Do you ever have guys who just like try to
move in and they're just.
Speaker 1 (07:57):
Like, oh my gosh. I was hooking up with this
barber once, so this is like pre fag cooking up
with this barber. He was so cute to me, and
I would hang out at his barbershop or whatever. But
I never like in his barber shop. I had an
upstairs area. I never went up there. And he would
come to my house and like make gumbo and we
like cook all these meals they had, like get together
(08:18):
this and stuff. He would always take showers at my house.
Like soon as you get to my house, you jump
in the shower and be like, damn, what's wrong with
He were like what, I'm like, why you gotta always
jump in the shower? Soon as you get to my house,
He's like, well, you know it's hot outside this this,
and I'm like it's raining, it ain't out. So I
used like I just wanted to I really like your
water pressure. And I was just like what. And then
I was like, oh, I want to spend night at
your house. I want to spend night at your house.
And so then he's like, nah, we cool here. I
(08:40):
was like, no, I want to see where you sleep.
Where do you sleep when you're not sleeping at my house?
He took me to the barber shop and I was like, wait,
you live in the barbershop. He was like yeah, upstairs.
We go upstairs and there's like a bed there. And
I was like, well, where's your like shower, where's your
bathroom and all that. He was like, oh, I wash
up in the in the shampoobo. I was like, wait,
you watch everything in the ship, so you take home
(09:05):
baths and then you come out of my plan. What
is it in nineteen twenty five you washing it a
ball or at least you got a toilet. At least
you got a toilet and yeah, And then I slowly
faded away because I didn't ghost him, but I definitely
slowly disappeared, and he'd be like, yeah, I can't come
(09:27):
up into the house and spend the night. I'm like, oh, man, nah,
I'm out of town. I'm out of town. I was
definitely in town. I just go up into my auntie house,
you know, I'm out of town. I'm out of town,
and just go over my family member's house, Like mm mmmm,
I can't have no grown man. He was like, he
said he owned the barbershop, but then turns out he
didn't own the barbershop. He was renting the shop. He
didn't even have a license to be a barber. Find
(09:50):
out like, yeah, I found out I had. I had
one ahead and it did some private investigation stuff because
I had learned that from a previous relationship how to
do background checks.
Speaker 2 (09:59):
Are you at the I am me too, I am do.
Speaker 1 (10:02):
You notthing like that?
Speaker 2 (10:04):
Oh my god, not anymore because I don't have to worry.
But before I was like psychotic about things like I
would need it to be in the phone. I did this,
and then I realized, like before Carter, I'm like, if
I'm going to be around someone like that and think
like that, I don't even want that in my life right,
so I still like I don't know. And Carter, he's
(10:24):
just so trustworthy, he would never do it. But with
other people like, I'm so happy I did it because
I saved so much time. I would have wasted time.
Speaker 1 (10:32):
Yeah, Oh, my goodness, you saved your heart. Yes, you
saved your heart so you can really love exactly. Yeah,
because my goodness I give. I feel like I'll be
giving too much in my heart. But with this new
background check thing I do for the last few years,
it's been working out pretty good. You know, I ask
a guy, you ever been to Jedi? Iin't never been to.
(10:52):
I'm a good guy. Oh okay, well, well what happened
in two thousand and three? You tell me your first
and last name. You told me when your birthday was. Also,
you lied about what year you was born. But that's okay.
I found out I talked to your mama. You talked
to my mama. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, I got her number.
She's one of your associates, people that might know you. Yep, yep,
I did the whole.
Speaker 2 (11:12):
Background How do you do it?
Speaker 1 (11:16):
I found some ways online yourself, so yeah, yeah, I
don't want to promote them because they're not paying me
the different websites. You know, it costs me thirty three
dollars a month. I feel like they should give me
thirty three dollars a month if I'm gonna talk about it,
I really think it should be thirty thousand dollars. Mon,
But it is what it is. I'm not going to
advertise them. But you know there's ways online to find
(11:36):
out what you need to find out.
Speaker 2 (11:37):
M hmm.
Speaker 1 (11:38):
Interesting public record. It helps you can see their name
on birth certificates.
Speaker 2 (11:44):
And all that loves up. Do you have any other
like crazy spy stories.
Speaker 1 (11:58):
I mean, I have some crazy spot stories I have
to think about. I got to dig into my mind, Frank,
what one.
Speaker 2 (12:05):
Of your favorites one of my favorites.
Speaker 1 (12:07):
One of my favorites says, it wasn't somebody I was
spying on in particular, not for me, but for my homegirl.
She was dating this guy and she really liked him.
He was the ticket man and she really wanted to
be with him. But I told her, like, girl, you
just something that dude, like he's not trying to be
in No, he's not trying to be serious, and she
didn't believe me. And then she's like, let's follow him.
(12:29):
He's supposed to be over here bowling. Let's go over there.
So this is when I had my little raggety Geo
Metro and it sounded like a lotmoreer and we was
trying to follow him, and so we following him, but
my car was slow. His car was fast and my
car sounded like a latmower. She's like, don't get too
close to him because we don't need him knowing that
it's you. Here's everybody know you drive this raggedy car.
(12:50):
So it's like following like four or five cars behind.
Finally catch up to him. He's at a bowling alley.
We pull into the things. I was like, should we
go into the bowling alley. She's like no, no, no, She's
like no, let's just duck down. So we ducking down.
We're staring at the side window watching them. He hugging
these girls. She was like, we should get out. Should
I get out the car? I was like, yeah, get
out the car, get out the car. She's like no, no, no,
(13:12):
we don't follow them to the next location. So we
try to follow them to the next location, but they
was going up here in my car. I make it
up there ye, and mission was dead at that point.
But at that point, you know, we had already seen
them with another girl. So I was like, hey, I
told you he not into you. So that was a
crazy situation right there. I love spine, you know what else? Okay,
(13:34):
So I used to hang out with this one girl
that was super into like the universe and you know,
the stunts and all that stuff and the stands, like
the breastcoats and the amathassal. She was like, Tiffany, you
know you can extra project. You can astra projecting the
people's dreams. You can follow them, your soul can see
(13:55):
them like you can ask for projector. She taught me
how to do it, and I did it, and I
think I even talked about this. I know I talked
about it on stage, but I did it. And now
I was married at the time, and I saw all
this stuff and I thought like, man, my imagination is
really off the chain. This couldn't be real. And then
when I got home, I asked my husband a few
(14:17):
questions at that time and he said, yeah, all that happened,
And I was like, oh, I got superpowers.
Speaker 2 (14:24):
In your dream you went so I.
Speaker 1 (14:27):
Wasn't dreaming I went into where he was at this point,
like during the day, so I was on the other
side of the country doing some comedy shows. My friend
had told me about this technique and to put a
video up off of YouTube and then you listen to
the video and you like lay down on the couch
or whatever, and you kind of like meditate where you
want to be, and then you go. And I felt
like I felt I could feel my body like go somewhere.
(14:50):
I don't know if I went to sleep and just
dreamed it or if I went there, but I saw
him at some places, and I saw him with some peoples,
particularly a female, and then I asked him about it,
and he said, did all that happened?
Speaker 2 (15:06):
Oh my god.
Speaker 1 (15:08):
And I was like, as he asked me if I
knew the girl, if the girl told me about it,
but I didn't know it.
Speaker 2 (15:14):
Wow, that's cool. You want to learn how to do that.
Speaker 1 (15:18):
I was like, ooh, we got to get some soul
lock on there, and get your soul locked because my
soul tracked his soul.
Speaker 2 (15:24):
That's like really cool. I feel like I've done that
in people's dreams. Yeah, and then we'll like meet some more.
That seems so fun and so cool. It's so weird,
like it happens a lot.
Speaker 1 (15:33):
Actually, Yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 2 (15:35):
I feel like I'm there.
Speaker 1 (15:36):
Yeah, like you're right there with us. When I go
to sleep at night, I'll dream about somebody and be
like yo, and we'll have like this whole experience. And
then I'll call them and be like, Yo, I had
a dream about you last night. They're like, hey, I
got to dream about you last night. I'm like, wait,
were we after that? And they're like, yeah, I was
at today. I'm like I was. We must have met
in Yes, it has to be. Yeah, have to be,
(15:56):
or we both smoked too much weed one or the others.
Speaker 2 (15:59):
I don't.
Speaker 1 (16:00):
I don't know. I don't know.
Speaker 2 (16:03):
I'm gonna google that after this because I want to
learn how to do the thing that you said and
I think I'm already doing it and I want to
see if that's actually real.
Speaker 1 (16:10):
Yeah, they say kids, They say kids do it all
the time, and it's easier when you're younger because you
don't like dismiss Yeah. But yeah, I'll send you the
video and everything.
Speaker 2 (16:24):
Ye me, the right one I.
Speaker 1 (16:25):
Will send you because I still be using it. I
think I si I'll be saying things, let's meet, Let's
meet tonight, Let's meet in the mall Beeves tonight.
Speaker 2 (16:37):
Okay, I'm doing it.
Speaker 1 (16:39):
I'm with you. Yes, I'm wearing a pink baby.
Speaker 2 (16:42):
I'm wearing of neon pink like hat and like flamingo shoots.
Speaker 1 (16:47):
Okay, I'll see you. Please have on some clothes too.
I don't I don't want to see you alight. It's a.
Speaker 2 (17:02):
Oh yah. In case anyone's wondering why we're not talking
about all the amazing projects and sick things that she's doing,
and it's because we're in the midst of the sag
after and W. J. S.
Speaker 1 (17:12):
Drakes, Well, it's not that we're not it's not that
we're not allowed. It's that it's frowned upon because we
want to make it clear. And yeah, we're making it
clear that you need us in order to do what
you do studios, in order to create the things that
you create studios, you need the actors, and you need
the writers. You need a person that's gonna be able
(17:34):
to tell the story, to write the story down, and
you need the person that's gonna be able to show
the story. Right. You got your directors, but who you
are the director's gonna direct if you ain't got no actors,
And what are they directing if you don't got no writers?
You know, reruns? I don't know. I don't know.
Speaker 2 (17:51):
Yeah, I think it's amazing that everybody's coming together and
supporting this because without everyone, like, we're not gonna have
all of our favorite shows and movies and everything.
Speaker 1 (18:00):
And some people would like to say, like one of
my friends is like, what y'all dripping out?
Speaker 2 (18:03):
Five?
Speaker 1 (18:03):
Y' all you actors, y'all making all this money, y'all
popping Why are you even doing this? Like, y'all make
more money than the average person. Why are you doing this?
It's like, first of all, the average actor is making
less than minimum wage. I was that average actor for
a long long time. I remember one of my first
gigs it still shows on TV and now it's streaming.
(18:24):
And I got a check about five months ago for
one cent that it cost them more money to print
that checkup, put it in an envelope and mail it
to me, and it cost me more money to drive
to the bank and try to cash it. Four years ago,
I got a check from another project I did. It
was for like two or three cents, and I thought
(18:46):
it would be funny to walk into the bank and cashy.
Do you know that they told me that check bounce.
They didn't have a three cents and they god, well,
you mean they ain't got the three cents? Oh yeah,
the account don't even work. So they sent me a
check for three cents to something that don't even exists
no more.
Speaker 2 (19:00):
That's insane.
Speaker 1 (19:01):
Do you know how much the gas was to get
to that thing? This is before I had an electric vehicle.
Speaker 2 (19:07):
Lord, that's insane.
Speaker 1 (19:10):
It's sad. It's that And it costs them so much
money to send that to me, and they shouldn't even
send it to me. But I still got the check.
I should post it. I should post all these little
bitty checks. I kept them all because to me, it
was like a sign of respect. Like and I just
feel like, if you're making money off of my talent, right,
(19:31):
and as long as you're making money off my talent,
I should be making money off my talent too. And
you know that that's how you get down, Like I'm
gonna just be using me and use me and use
me and don't bring nothing to the table. You can't
use me up like I gotta eat too. If you eat,
and I should eat. If your family having a nice house,
I should have a basis something nice, something so. And
(19:53):
there's so many actors that do small parts. They player parts,
you know, and they signed that contract and they worked
that one day and they get paid this amount of
money for that day. But every time that it comes
on air, there's supposed to be some compensation. And once
it starts going to streaming, they can't try. Well, they could,
but they want. They say they can't, but they can
(20:15):
because how are you gonna tell me this is the
number one movie on this on the streaming service, so
this is the number one TV show, This is the
thing everybody's watching. How are you able to tell me that?
But you can't tell me how many views there are.
You could tell me how many views there are, and
you can compensate me accordingly, even if it is two cents.
Speaker 2 (20:37):
It's so insane.
Speaker 1 (20:38):
Yeah, I I don't know why they don't direct deposit.
Don't get me started on that. Don't get me started
on that. But that's just a small bit of the
major issue.
Speaker 2 (20:47):
Mm hm. Well, I like that you speak about it.
Speaker 1 (20:49):
If it's streaming on a network, you're probably getting something.
If it's streaming on a streaming service, you should be
compensated for that. That was time of your life, that
was an experience you had. They was using your facial image.
And if they're advertising anything, if they're getting subscribers, and
you should be compensated for that. And I don't care
(21:10):
how much money you already got, you should be compensated.
They're using your image.
Speaker 2 (21:17):
Good to know. Let's look into that.
Speaker 1 (21:21):
Somebody in the logistics get to it, business affairs, hop
on it, please.
Speaker 2 (21:35):
So you were born and raised in LA. You're born
and raised in LA in south central What are your
earliest memories being there?
Speaker 1 (21:43):
My earliest memories, my earliest fondest memories is the playground
across the street from my mama house that was a
school and watching the other kids play and wanting to
go play with them, and trying across the street and
realizing that cars are dangerous and you can't just walk
across streets. Playing in the wading pool in the front yard,
(22:05):
playing with my neighbors. I used to love hanging out
in an avocado tree. We had an avocado tree in
the backyard, so I used to hang out in an
avocado tree and eat avocados. Or and I would walk
down to my grandma's house and she had a plum
tree and we would just hang out in a plum
tree and eat plums all day. I'm gonna tell you
right now, I was the I had the best moving
(22:26):
boughs in all of South Central Because if you eat
plums all day in the tree, guess what you're gonna
be at all night. You're gonna be on the toilet
all night. That's where you're gonna be. Yes, my stomach
was flat flat. I had to flyat apps. I had
apps as a little girl. Why because I ate plums
all day in the tree. I didn't even eat regular food.
I just wanted to eat the plums in the avocados.
(22:48):
And yeah, I had a very flat stomach.
Speaker 2 (22:52):
Love sad.
Speaker 1 (22:55):
I think that's gonna be my new workout plany. As
soon as my plum tree get big enough to hold me,
I'm gonna climb up in it and just eat the
plums up the tree summer.
Speaker 2 (23:05):
I love that. I haven't had one since I was little,
but now I want one.
Speaker 1 (23:10):
Okay, so my next harvest, which won't be told, Yeah, yeah,
I got plump trees.
Speaker 2 (23:16):
Themselves still.
Speaker 1 (23:17):
So I got my own plum trees because when I passed,
I wanted to be cremated, and I want my ashes
to be buried at the plum tree, and then everybody
who ever loved me, I want them to eat the
fruit from that tree a year later, because the plums
always come out in this summer, and the summertime it's
the best time. So yeah, nice, and I want to
be inside of them for twenty four hours and then
(23:38):
pass out of them and see what they do in
the ocean. It won't be me me, It'll be my vitamins,
nutrients and stuff. It both mostly be nitrogen, because that's
I think it's nitrogen. Yeah when you yeah, it's nitrogen
when you the ashes. I don't have any day. Sorry,
plant stuff, I'm heavy, Yeah, I'm heavy in the plants
(23:59):
and stuff.
Speaker 2 (24:01):
I want to do that here, like build a little
like a garden. Yeah, I have like a sick area
that I was like those things that are like made
for gardens. But I just don't know what I'm doing.
Speaker 1 (24:11):
I can show you. I come out, I bring some
of my seeds. I don't even bring some of my
seed lings and show you how to do it, and like,
you don't have to put a whole lot of time.
You could have your sprinkling system set up. And I
know how to do that too. I know how to
set up a whole sprinkling system and then water themselves
and you just come out like two three times a week.
If there's weeds, pull the weeds. Talk to the plants.
(24:32):
I love talking to the plants and makes it so good.
I gotta bring you some honey.
Speaker 2 (24:35):
I got bees.
Speaker 1 (24:37):
I got bees, girl, bees in the trap with the honey.
Speaker 2 (24:40):
What you're like simple life vibes?
Speaker 1 (24:43):
Yeah, yeah, but it's complicated life. But it's simple. It's
simply complicated. That's what it is. It's simply complicated.
Speaker 2 (24:50):
That's so fun.
Speaker 1 (24:51):
I gotta show you the bees. You got COMLM. I
bring you to the hood. Yeah, we'll bring security for you,
but I don't think you're gonna need it. Nah nah,
I got the whole block on lot.
Speaker 2 (25:00):
I love it. Yes, Okay, So when you were only
nine years old, your mom got in a car crash
which changed everything for your whole family. Can you tell
our listeners what happened?
Speaker 1 (25:12):
So basically, we moved. So my mom got married to
this man and she had kids buy them, and he
moved us from La to Promona and then from Promona
to Colton, which is like far and my mom worked
the graveyard shift at the US Post Office in Marina
(25:32):
del Ray, so she would leave. We would have to
leave the house like once we got out of school,
do our homeworking stuff. And then she'd be like, okay,
everybody get in a car and we would drive all
the way to La and she would drop me off
and me and my brothers and sisters off at my
grandma's house, and then she would continue on to work
at the post office and she would work all night
and then pick us up in the morning, like five
in the morning, six in the morning, and then we
(25:54):
drive all the way back to Colton and I would
go to school, and that was like the routine. In
one particular day, I was just like, Mama, let me babysit, Like,
let me just babysit. I know how to make hot dogs,
I know how to make you know, I know how
to cook all the stuff. I know how to make
baby's bottles. Like my little sister, she was not even once.
She was like nine months and my little had little sister,
(26:17):
little brother at that time, and and she was like, okay,
I'm running late. So she left, and then she said
if I call the house. Before she left, she said,
if I call the house, the phone's gonna ring twice
and then I'm gonna hang up and I'm a call back,
and that's me answer the phone. Otherwise, do not answer
the phone. Three days go by, no call, no nothing,
(26:38):
he didn't come home. Nobody's coming home.
Speaker 2 (26:41):
So then you're alone with everyone.
Speaker 1 (26:43):
And I'm alone with my at that point in time,
two sisters and one brother at that point. And I
called my grandma and asked her if she's seen my mom.
And she goes, no, she never came over. I'm like, well,
she hasn't come home in three days. She's like, well,
you guys are buy yourself. I'm like, yeah, we buy ourselves.
Then I was like, we've low on food. We running
out of food. There's barely even more hot dogs we
got right though, I'm making rice. I'm making like you know,
(27:05):
the top rom and stuff. So I felt very proud
of myself because I could cook, which I had been
doing for a long time. But I'm not like, you know,
going main meals is whatever stuff. But and my grandma
called around, called around, and then nobody knew where my
mom was. She didn't show up to work. And then
she called my stepdad's family member and they said she's
(27:25):
at the hospital. What hospital she was at? Now, she
had a car accident. She's like, what, nobody? Why didn't
nobody tell me? Then then my grandma says, look, your
mom's in the hospital. I'm gonna go check on her.
And I'm gonna come check on y'all. And next thing
I know, my stepdad's there and he's like, comes in,
gets like paperwork and stuff, and he's out. He's like,
I'll be back and he's out. Oh and he left some.
He did bring some In and Out Burger though, And
(27:47):
I still to this day love In and Out burg anyways.
And if the In and Out Burger wants to pay
me to talk about how much I loved them, no, anyways,
so love it that double double animal stuff protest anyways. Yeah,
So cut to she had her head went through windshield,
(28:07):
she had to learn how to walk, talk, eat everything
all love her again. And I remember the day that
she came out of the hospital. The doctor was like,
you know, you're gonna have to be a big girl.
You know everything. You don't have to help your mom
a lot. You have to be a big girl and
help your mama. And you okay with that, I'll say, yeah,
I'm definitely okat that. I love my mommy like anything
my mommy taught me. I'm gonna teach my mommy like
you know. And I did everything anything that I could do,
(28:31):
I did it. And I tried my best to take
care of my sisters and brothers to take care of her.
It was not easy. It's very hard. I could not read, really,
I just I knew what, Like the way my brain
works is like, I knew what the word looked like.
I knew what words looked like, and I would assume
that's what it is. I know what McDonald's look like,
(28:52):
I know what Burger King looked like. Like things that
were marketed to me and shown to me constantly. I
knew those words. I know my name, I know what
that looks like. I know like with certain things. And
so it was really difficult because we ended up getting
food stamps, we ended up like on welfare and all
this stuff. And I knew how to count money. Though
I knew how to count, you can't it and I
(29:12):
still know how to count it down on them. I'm
I can't read that good, but I can count like
it ain't nobody business. And so I would get the
groceries and and I remember being like always being my
mama's cheerleader, and so, no, you could do it, Mama,
You could drive, you could do this, you could do that.
Like and when we had to leave from Colton, we
were getting evicted because couldn't pay the rent. No one,
(29:33):
we survived. And you know, by the time I was twelve,
I guess I wasn't the best mom. I wasn't the
best at it right. And my mom by then she
tried to get back with my stepdad and ended up
getting pregnant with my baby brother and gave birth to him.
And her mental her mental health was not good. I mean,
(29:53):
I don't know if you noticed, but if your head
go through a windshield, you're not gonna be the same always.
And she wasn't. And I was. I used to think
that a demon had got inside her body and like
took over my mama's body because she got so violent
and so mean, and I was just always trying to
figure out ways to make her laugh, like in order
(30:14):
not to get hit because she used to be really
good with her words, but once you have an accident
like that, it's very hard to communicate. And she would
get frustrated and like punch me and hit me and
all this stuff. And I was okay with it because
I loved her, like she is my mommy, like the
first person I ever loved. I don't know if I
loved her as much as I love my grandma, but
(30:36):
she was my first love, right, She's my everything. And
you say like earliest memories. I sometimes I can remember,
like when I think about her, I remember like being
like she would be breastfeeding me. I think that's the
gayest I ever been, and she she would be see
try to feel better, feel better. But like I I
(31:00):
can remember her feeding me and me looking up at
her and like just holding her cheek, or like playing
in her hair, and her smiling at me and staring
at me, and me staring back at her, like us
falling in love with you. You remember, I can remember that
when I think about her, like I'm thinking about her now,
like my little heart opens up and I can remember
(31:21):
just loving her. She was she is my love and
then like then my Grandmamber, my grandma always smiling. My
grandma smiles like the best smiling the world. When me
and my mom would get into it, my grandma would
be like, you leave out loud, and Grandma was like
my hero, come rescue me, and her smile is the
(31:42):
best smiling. She would hold me at home, like I
miss my grandma so much. That was my that's my
best friend. She's basically my first best friend. I make
sometimes I love her more than I love my mama.
You know, yeah, how about you?
Speaker 2 (31:57):
I love my mom's so munch. But my grandmother passed
away when she was sixty three, and she we were
so close, Like I lived with her for a year
when I was sent away. My parents sent me to
pump Springs for ninth grade and I lived with her,
and she was just like a force of nature. She
was just so inspiring to me and like I learned
(32:18):
so much of everything, and I felt like she was
like my second mom.
Speaker 1 (32:21):
Right I was wishing. I used to be asking my grandma,
why you gotta be my grandma, Why you can't be
my real mama? Like you don't hit me like she
hit me. You love me, and she's like your mama
love you too. That's just how she This is how
she's keeping you strong. Did you get.
Speaker 2 (32:37):
Spankings from my parents?
Speaker 1 (32:39):
Yeah? From anybody that was an authority over you. Did
you get spankings and whoopings? It's okay now it's statute limitation.
Speaker 2 (32:45):
My parents at Provocanian School and all those schools that
I got sent to, yes, they would like thank you,
strangle you, hit you, sexually abused, like those people are sick.
Speaker 1 (32:59):
Yeah, that's like being in the system. Now, that's being
you were. It was you were in the system. It's
like being in foster care.
Speaker 2 (33:05):
Seventy percent of the kids were either foster care or
in the system or from just the mental health words, children,
less disabilities, everything a lot.
Speaker 1 (33:17):
When I read your book, I was like booed to
the who win, Because I mean, we've had conversations and
we don't get too deep into it, but I can.
I get it and I connect with you immediately because
I know you because I stayed in group homes and
stuff because by the time I was twelve, but that
was it foster care, moving around from house to house, strangers,
(33:40):
group situations, trying to figure out how to fit in,
how do I maneuver in this world like it's all
like Hollywood is easy.
Speaker 2 (33:48):
Yeah, this is prepared.
Speaker 1 (33:50):
Never like, oh it's dangerous. I'm like, you have no
idea what danger is. But this is nothing.
Speaker 2 (33:55):
You're supposed to be somewhere. We're being protected, and these
people are taking advantage of their power doing the most
terrible things to a child.
Speaker 1 (34:04):
I'm like, do they do why don't they do? Do
they do mental exam I know you got to take
like mental tests to be in the FBI, right, you
got to have a certain mental capacity and stuff to
be in the FBI. I think, Okay, that's cute FBI
and all that, but you should have some some There
should be severe mental examinations and tests going and challenges
(34:24):
and all kind of stuff that are constantly happening every
year for these teachers, for these administrators, for these social workers.
So the freaking people that run the group homes that
these organizations that's supposed to be protecting you and teaching
you and mentor like, there should be some severe background
(34:45):
situation checks on them because that's where the damage is happening. Yeah,
that's what I really feel, like, like it's so true.
I mean, it's it's all right to say it, But
it's the motherfucker in the suit I'm looking at that
I'm concerned about that's probably gonna do something. The person
that's supposed to be the superhero I got your back,
(35:09):
that's probably the person that's gonna be the one that
do something really bad, as opposed to as opposed to
the one that's wearing the flashy colors and the weird
and they got weird stuff on it and booty cheeks
hanging out.
Speaker 2 (35:22):
They don't do background trucks like there's It really attracts
like pedophiles and sick people who want to have that power, sick,
super sick.
Speaker 1 (35:30):
Yeah, it's the one in the suit. Watch the one
in the suit.
Speaker 2 (35:34):
And of course they'll be like, oh, these kids are troubled,
they're this, like they're lying, and it's like the perfect
storm for someone because they're gonna get away with it.
Speaker 1 (35:40):
Oh my god, I remember this one lady. She wanted
to keep she wanted to keep this kid on drugs,
on the medication. The kid didn't need to medicate. Kids like,
I'm not depressed, I'm not this, I'm not all all
these things. You keep telling them, that's not who I am.
We were teenagers, and it was because they get more
money if you are on medication, the false appearance or whatever.
(36:02):
That lady was a coordinator. We were in this group.
They get more money if you're on nets. If they
have to minige the medication to you, they get make
more money. So they want to keep you on the drugs.
It's like, I don't need these drugs. I just need
somebody to help me with my homework. That's all I mean.
Somebody helped me with my homemak. That's what they kept
on saying it. They kept on saying it, and this
lady was kept on trying to shut drugs down them.
(36:24):
They even say they want to give me some drugs.
But I taught to social worker, I'm allergic to drugs.
I don't want to if I have a mental problem,
I'd rather just sit and talk to somebody, and talk
to somebody and talk to somebody. I'm allergic to drugs.
Now Here I am thirty years later. You know, I
ain't on drugs. With drugs, I'm like, I smoke weed
(36:45):
and I do drink alcohol. That's my drug a choice.
But when I turn seventy, I'm doing drug car I'm
doing all the shit when I turn seventy. That's the
future conversation. I'm gonna be hot in up at seventy.
That's what it makes sense to be highest. I mean,
my knee's gonna be bad, my elbows, I ain't gonna
like what I was see in the mirror that much.
So I'm gonna get high. I'm gonna be high as
(37:06):
hell in my estate walking around butt nagga and I'm
like Timy on the street. But Nigga, oh yeah, she old,
she an old lady. She old don't pay her no attention.
That's that old people's stuff. That's what I'm gonna be doing.
I'm getting st up at seventy.
Speaker 2 (37:19):
All right, this has been the most fun time I've
ever had on this podcast. I've never left so hard.
I love hanging out. Love hanging up with you too,
sween friends for so many years. Now. Do you remember
the first time that we met.
Speaker 1 (37:33):
I remember the first time I ever met you. This
was back in early two thousands, and I was trying
to get into your section but I couldn't get into
the section, but you were super sweet. I had started
a big old dance circle we was at. I want
to say coca that tea seris, remember coking that, Just
say it's coking that teas. And I had started a
big old dance circle and I was dancing the middle
(37:55):
circle and you had came out. You was like yeah,
god yeah. I was like yeah, dancing. And then I
will see you here and there at different events and stuff,
but I never bothered you. And then Harper's Bizarre A Party,
I was there, you were there. I think I was
wearing white. I think you were wearing like an off
(38:15):
white or something like that, or maybe it was you
was wearing a cute dress. I just remember it was
a cute ass dress.
Speaker 2 (38:19):
Honey, I'm always in a cute trap. Facts.
Speaker 1 (38:23):
Facts, you are always in a cute dress. And we
were having a good time and you were like, I
love you. I love you make me laugh so hard,
and I feel like that was the first time we
really connected. And I was like, I love you. You are
so smart. And I wanted to fangirl out and be
like I got all your perfume, I got all your makeup,
I got all your stuff, but I didn't want to
like be too much of a groupie Liot.
Speaker 2 (38:46):
Was to talk to you. I was like oh my god.
Speaker 1 (38:48):
I love her, and I didn't want to be like
a finger and I would have and now I know
that you would have loved that, but I didn't. Like
I didn't want to be the annoying like fan and
I wanted to be like your best friend. But I
was like, I'm gonna be chill. I'm not gonna and
I'm not gonna be like aggressive with her. But I
was like, and I know I had said something to
the face. You was like, oh, I like your should
you wear teeny shoes? I like it goes with the
(39:09):
dress and everything. I was like, yeah, Greg got each
shoes on my feet hurt. I can't be having my
feet all messed up out here. And he was like
that is so smart. That's so smart. And I was like, no,
you're so smart, and and then we were like laughing,
and my stylist had came up and you started talking
to him, and then we were walking away and I
was just like, we're gonna be friends, and he was
like yeah, guy, And I was like, oh, she think
(39:31):
I'm playing and we've been friends. No, And I love you.
Speaker 2 (39:36):
I love you me too. I could literally sit and
talk with you all day and night. Because you're literally
the most entertaining, sweetest, kindest. I had no idea about
so many things you just told me. I'm like in
all of you. You're so strong, you're so incredible, You're
(39:58):
such a beautiful person, you have such a big heart,
and like I love you so much.
Speaker 1 (40:03):
I love you so much. Thank you for inviting me
once again.
Speaker 2 (40:10):
Yes we have to do that after this. All right, guys,
I hope you enjoyed well. I know you did, and
we will see you for the next episode, which will
be about the present living. Thanks for listening to I
Am Paris. Don't forget to follow us on Instagram at
I Am Paris podcast, email us at Paris at iHeartRadio
dot com, be hot and subscribe now loves It.
Wow, I a embarrassed.
Speaker 2 (00:10):
Hey everyone, I'm so excited for today's interview. I love
this woman so much. She is one of the funniest
person I've ever met in my life. No one makes
me laugh smile, I have the best time. She has
the biggest heart. She's beautiful inside and out. She's just
(00:32):
like alleged and an icon. She's an actress, she's a comedian,
she's a singer, she's a writer, she's an author, she's
a philanthropist, she's an advocate, she's a boss, and she's
a queen. Tiffany Hattish, Hey, she ready. Welcome Sis. I'm
(00:53):
so happy you're here. They love you. Oh my gosh,
she looks so cute next to you, a little crypto.
She got her haircut.
Speaker 1 (01:01):
And she's feeling fancy today. You feeling fat and.
Speaker 2 (01:05):
Si, she literally is like a different dog. Now. Her
hair was like so puffy, it was like this giant ball.
And then I was like, I want her to be
a teddy bear. And now she like walked in and
was so proud with the hair. You guys tell her,
she she knew.
Speaker 1 (01:18):
Look at my dog's like that too. I have like
a little Maltese Yorky mix, and when her hair is
all grown out, I feel like she has a bad attitude.
And then when I get her haircut, she's like, what up, eh,
I'm cute today, check me out. That is, she prancies
wags her booty like she don't even she normally just
wags her tail. But when she gets her haircut, booty
be movement and everything like look at me.
Speaker 2 (01:40):
I'm fine, Oh yeah, we're the same.
Speaker 1 (01:43):
Me too, I'm the same way.
Speaker 2 (01:45):
Dogs are like the owner, I feel like.
Speaker 1 (01:47):
They are they are they pick up your personality treats.
Speaker 2 (01:50):
I heard that certain every pet you have, like dogs especially,
are supposed to be with you, Like it's something like
in the cause, I don't know what you would call it,
but like supposedly like spiritually, like they come for like
a reason, like a specific person.
Speaker 1 (02:05):
I feel like my last dog came just to pee
all over my friends, just to make my house smell
like a nursing home. I think that's what she came for.
And then she she ran out into the street and
got hit by She got hit by a car. I'm
hurt by that, But then I'm like, well, you been
the smartest dog, and I learned to love even if
(02:25):
you're not smart. I love you anyways.
Speaker 2 (02:30):
And did you have any pets that you felt came
to for better reason?
Speaker 1 (02:35):
Yes, Sleeper that's the one that's I've had her for
fifteen years now, and she's the sweetest, kindest. I think
she came to me to protect me. And then Dreamer
that's my dog that passed away last year. She was
with me for fourteen years, and I believe she came
to me to just let me know who has STDs. Well, yes,
(02:58):
what I mean, yes, she let me know who have
She let me know what dudes to deal with and
what dudes not to deal with. What would she do?
She would like, okay, so if the dude came in
the house, she would walk up to him, immediately greet them.
She smiled like she's a blue nose piple, So she
got this big old smile, and then she instantly smell
their genitals, smell the genital area, smell their butt, and
(03:19):
then she would come over to me and she would sit.
And if she sat and just sat there and just
like kind of smiled, it's all good. But if she
sat there and she starts sneezing, I'm like, oh, he's sick.
What And would I would say something. I would be like,
when the last time you got to check up? When
it's the last time you went to the doctor. And
they would be like what what? And I'm like, look,
(03:40):
if we're gonna go, you definitely gotta go to the doctor.
And they would go and they would be having like
they would have stuff.
Speaker 2 (03:46):
Oh my god, she knew, she.
Speaker 1 (03:48):
Knew, she could smell it. She's an STD sniffing dog.
Speaker 2 (03:52):
Do you still have her?
Speaker 1 (03:53):
She died, She passed away. She passed away. She she
had cancer and she passed away fourteen years and she lived.
For people, that is a long life. That's good. I
was her girl. I think I talked to her. I
think I saw you like a month later, and I
was trying to be happy, but everywhere I was looking,
I was like, this is my dreamer. All my animals
(04:15):
are name after something that deals with rest, because that's
what I want more rest. So dreamer, sleeper, slumber, yep,
I gotta I got. I got a cat from a
job that I did, and that cat, her name is
cat Tonic. And we moved to a new house and yeah,
she decided to be for the streets. She no longer
(04:37):
wanted to live with me. She see me, she come
by and visit me, but she don't want to live
with me no more because she for the streets now.
And I got another cat and his name is a
boy cat is my first male animal in a long time.
And his name is Sleepy black Man because he all
black and he got out the house last night. I
was walking around the neighborhood this morning. Come on, Sleepy
(04:59):
black Man and Sleepy black Man. My neighbors were very confused.
I was very confused. It's like, why is she walking
around screaming Sleepy black Man. And then some of them
came out and asked me why am I doing that?
And I was like, I can't find my cat, and
I show them picture. Now they are the whole neighborhood
looking for Sleepy black Man. So hopefully by the time
I get home, Sleepy black Man be found.
Speaker 2 (05:20):
Oh my god.
Speaker 1 (05:21):
Well, but he probably a cats so he probably just
hanging out in the tree watching me walk around calling
for him, laughing at me. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (05:30):
I have a cat named Kutti and she gets out
all the time too, And it's up here, there's so
many coyotes, so I get so scared right now.
Speaker 1 (05:38):
There's no coyote. There's there are coyotes in the hood.
Like I live in South Central and there are coyotes occasionally.
They don't come down often, but when they do, then
I know there's no food up in the mountains. And
there's not even big mountains over there. You know, it's
like Ladera Heights because it's not that hi a mountain,
but we do occasionally get coyotes. That's not like I'm
looking for a boyfriend on it. But yeah, but you
(06:00):
got to see speaking into existence whatever it is you want.
Speaker 2 (06:03):
Do you have a boyfriend?
Speaker 1 (06:04):
I have associates.
Speaker 2 (06:07):
That's hot.
Speaker 1 (06:07):
I can't even look you in the eye because I
don't want to lie to you.
Speaker 2 (06:10):
Do Oh. I thought you were going to say like
you were in love or something, not yet.
Speaker 1 (06:16):
I'm I want to be I want to be in love,
but no, I got I date. I have friends.
Speaker 2 (06:22):
That's good. Yeah, it's hard in this town. It's very hard.
It was hard before fame, and it's hard after. It's harder.
Speaker 1 (06:30):
I feel like after, way harder after because you can't
have like a you know, we're not before fame. I
could have some you know, home moments I can't have
no home moments now whatever, because men love to gossip.
Back in the day, they would gossiping. Nobody knew who
they was talking about. Now they gossip, they'd be like, man,
you don't really know her. Man, you ain't show me
a picture of you are together, and they don't have none.
Speaker 2 (06:52):
Yes, I know. I'm so happy I finally found someone
I could trust, because in this town, especially if you're
in this business, everyone's like out to get something, or
they want to use you, or they just want the cloud,
or they just want to, I don't know, just do
so many duff things or sell stories about you. Yeah,
just like people are crazy. It's so annoying.
Speaker 1 (07:14):
I just why I don't let me get that close.
So this one guy I've been hanging out with, he's like,
why every time I come over here, you always have
me in the guest room. Why why can't go in
your room? I want to go in your room. I
was like, oh, no, no, no, no, you haven't earned main room privileges.
He's like, so we just got to hook up in
the guest room. I was like, yeah, you're a guest
you're not living here. You don't get main room privileges.
(07:37):
You know, when you pay a mortgage, then you can't
have some main room privilege. He was like, how much
is the mortgage? I told him how much mortgage was.
He was like, yeah, I'm cool with being in the
guest room. I'll be right here in the guest room.
Do you need me to walk the dog for you? You
need me to change your kid in litter? I can
do something around here. M h Yeah.
Speaker 2 (07:54):
Do you ever have guys who just like try to
move in and they're just.
Speaker 1 (07:57):
Like, oh my gosh. I was hooking up with this
barber once, so this is like pre fag cooking up
with this barber. He was so cute to me, and
I would hang out at his barbershop or whatever. But
I never like in his barber shop. I had an
upstairs area. I never went up there. And he would
come to my house and like make gumbo and we
like cook all these meals they had, like get together
(08:18):
this and stuff. He would always take showers at my house.
Like soon as you get to my house, you jump
in the shower and be like, damn, what's wrong with
He were like what, I'm like, why you gotta always
jump in the shower? Soon as you get to my house,
He's like, well, you know it's hot outside this this,
and I'm like it's raining, it ain't out. So I
used like I just wanted to I really like your
water pressure. And I was just like what. And then
I was like, oh, I want to spend night at
your house. I want to spend night at your house.
And so then he's like, nah, we cool here. I
(08:40):
was like, no, I want to see where you sleep.
Where do you sleep when you're not sleeping at my house?
He took me to the barber shop and I was like, wait,
you live in the barbershop. He was like yeah, upstairs.
We go upstairs and there's like a bed there. And
I was like, well, where's your like shower, where's your
bathroom and all that. He was like, oh, I wash
up in the in the shampoobo. I was like, wait,
you watch everything in the ship, so you take home
(09:05):
baths and then you come out of my plan. What
is it in nineteen twenty five you washing it a
ball or at least you got a toilet. At least
you got a toilet and yeah, And then I slowly
faded away because I didn't ghost him, but I definitely
slowly disappeared, and he'd be like, yeah, I can't come
(09:27):
up into the house and spend the night. I'm like, oh, man, nah,
I'm out of town. I'm out of town. I was
definitely in town. I just go up into my auntie house,
you know, I'm out of town. I'm out of town,
and just go over my family member's house, Like mm mmmm,
I can't have no grown man. He was like, he
said he owned the barbershop, but then turns out he
didn't own the barbershop. He was renting the shop. He
didn't even have a license to be a barber. Find
(09:50):
out like, yeah, I found out I had. I had
one ahead and it did some private investigation stuff because
I had learned that from a previous relationship how to
do background checks.
Speaker 2 (09:59):
Are you at the I am me too, I am do.
Speaker 1 (10:02):
You notthing like that?
Speaker 2 (10:04):
Oh my god, not anymore because I don't have to worry.
But before I was like psychotic about things like I
would need it to be in the phone. I did this,
and then I realized, like before Carter, I'm like, if
I'm going to be around someone like that and think
like that, I don't even want that in my life right,
so I still like I don't know. And Carter, he's
(10:24):
just so trustworthy, he would never do it. But with
other people like, I'm so happy I did it because
I saved so much time. I would have wasted time.
Speaker 1 (10:32):
Yeah, Oh, my goodness, you saved your heart. Yes, you
saved your heart so you can really love exactly. Yeah,
because my goodness I give. I feel like I'll be
giving too much in my heart. But with this new
background check thing I do for the last few years,
it's been working out pretty good. You know, I ask
a guy, you ever been to Jedi? Iin't never been to.
(10:52):
I'm a good guy. Oh okay, well, well what happened
in two thousand and three? You tell me your first
and last name. You told me when your birthday was. Also,
you lied about what year you was born. But that's okay.
I found out I talked to your mama. You talked
to my mama. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, I got her number.
She's one of your associates, people that might know you. Yep, yep,
I did the whole.
Speaker 2 (11:12):
Background How do you do it?
Speaker 1 (11:16):
I found some ways online yourself, so yeah, yeah, I
don't want to promote them because they're not paying me
the different websites. You know, it costs me thirty three
dollars a month. I feel like they should give me
thirty three dollars a month if I'm gonna talk about it,
I really think it should be thirty thousand dollars. Mon,
But it is what it is. I'm not going to
advertise them. But you know there's ways online to find
(11:36):
out what you need to find out.
Speaker 2 (11:37):
M hmm.
Speaker 1 (11:38):
Interesting public record. It helps you can see their name
on birth certificates.
Speaker 2 (11:44):
And all that loves up. Do you have any other
like crazy spy stories.
Speaker 1 (11:58):
I mean, I have some crazy spot stories I have
to think about. I got to dig into my mind, Frank,
what one.
Speaker 2 (12:05):
Of your favorites one of my favorites.
Speaker 1 (12:07):
One of my favorites says, it wasn't somebody I was
spying on in particular, not for me, but for my homegirl.
She was dating this guy and she really liked him.
He was the ticket man and she really wanted to
be with him. But I told her, like, girl, you
just something that dude, like he's not trying to be
in No, he's not trying to be serious, and she
didn't believe me. And then she's like, let's follow him.
(12:29):
He's supposed to be over here bowling. Let's go over there.
So this is when I had my little raggety Geo
Metro and it sounded like a lotmoreer and we was
trying to follow him, and so we following him, but
my car was slow. His car was fast and my
car sounded like a latmower. She's like, don't get too
close to him because we don't need him knowing that
it's you. Here's everybody know you drive this raggedy car.
(12:50):
So it's like following like four or five cars behind.
Finally catch up to him. He's at a bowling alley.
We pull into the things. I was like, should we
go into the bowling alley. She's like no, no, no, She's
like no, let's just duck down. So we ducking down.
We're staring at the side window watching them. He hugging
these girls. She was like, we should get out. Should
I get out the car? I was like, yeah, get
out the car, get out the car. She's like no, no, no,
(13:12):
we don't follow them to the next location. So we
try to follow them to the next location, but they
was going up here in my car. I make it
up there ye, and mission was dead at that point.
But at that point, you know, we had already seen
them with another girl. So I was like, hey, I
told you he not into you. So that was a
crazy situation right there. I love spine, you know what else? Okay,
(13:34):
So I used to hang out with this one girl
that was super into like the universe and you know,
the stunts and all that stuff and the stands, like
the breastcoats and the amathassal. She was like, Tiffany, you
know you can extra project. You can astra projecting the
people's dreams. You can follow them, your soul can see
(13:55):
them like you can ask for projector. She taught me
how to do it, and I did it, and I
think I even talked about this. I know I talked
about it on stage, but I did it. And now
I was married at the time, and I saw all
this stuff and I thought like, man, my imagination is
really off the chain. This couldn't be real. And then
when I got home, I asked my husband a few
(14:17):
questions at that time and he said, yeah, all that happened,
And I was like, oh, I got superpowers.
Speaker 2 (14:24):
In your dream you went so I.
Speaker 1 (14:27):
Wasn't dreaming I went into where he was at this point,
like during the day, so I was on the other
side of the country doing some comedy shows. My friend
had told me about this technique and to put a
video up off of YouTube and then you listen to
the video and you like lay down on the couch
or whatever, and you kind of like meditate where you
want to be, and then you go. And I felt
like I felt I could feel my body like go somewhere.
(14:50):
I don't know if I went to sleep and just
dreamed it or if I went there, but I saw
him at some places, and I saw him with some peoples,
particularly a female, and then I asked him about it,
and he said, did all that happened?
Speaker 2 (15:06):
Oh my god.
Speaker 1 (15:08):
And I was like, as he asked me if I
knew the girl, if the girl told me about it,
but I didn't know it.
Speaker 2 (15:14):
Wow, that's cool. You want to learn how to do that.
Speaker 1 (15:18):
I was like, ooh, we got to get some soul
lock on there, and get your soul locked because my
soul tracked his soul.
Speaker 2 (15:24):
That's like really cool. I feel like I've done that
in people's dreams. Yeah, and then we'll like meet some more.
That seems so fun and so cool. It's so weird,
like it happens a lot.
Speaker 1 (15:33):
Actually, Yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 2 (15:35):
I feel like I'm there.
Speaker 1 (15:36):
Yeah, like you're right there with us. When I go
to sleep at night, I'll dream about somebody and be
like yo, and we'll have like this whole experience. And
then I'll call them and be like, Yo, I had
a dream about you last night. They're like, hey, I
got to dream about you last night. I'm like, wait,
were we after that? And they're like, yeah, I was
at today. I'm like I was. We must have met
in Yes, it has to be. Yeah, have to be,
(15:56):
or we both smoked too much weed one or the others.
Speaker 2 (15:59):
I don't.
Speaker 1 (16:00):
I don't know. I don't know.
Speaker 2 (16:03):
I'm gonna google that after this because I want to
learn how to do the thing that you said and
I think I'm already doing it and I want to
see if that's actually real.
Speaker 1 (16:10):
Yeah, they say kids, They say kids do it all
the time, and it's easier when you're younger because you
don't like dismiss Yeah. But yeah, I'll send you the
video and everything.
Speaker 2 (16:24):
Ye me, the right one I.
Speaker 1 (16:25):
Will send you because I still be using it. I
think I si I'll be saying things, let's meet, Let's
meet tonight, Let's meet in the mall Beeves tonight.
Speaker 2 (16:37):
Okay, I'm doing it.
Speaker 1 (16:39):
I'm with you. Yes, I'm wearing a pink baby.
Speaker 2 (16:42):
I'm wearing of neon pink like hat and like flamingo shoots.
Speaker 1 (16:47):
Okay, I'll see you. Please have on some clothes too.
I don't I don't want to see you alight. It's a.
Speaker 2 (17:02):
Oh yah. In case anyone's wondering why we're not talking
about all the amazing projects and sick things that she's doing,
and it's because we're in the midst of the sag
after and W. J. S.
Speaker 1 (17:12):
Drakes, Well, it's not that we're not it's not that
we're not allowed. It's that it's frowned upon because we
want to make it clear. And yeah, we're making it
clear that you need us in order to do what
you do studios, in order to create the things that
you create studios, you need the actors, and you need
the writers. You need a person that's gonna be able
(17:34):
to tell the story, to write the story down, and
you need the person that's gonna be able to show
the story. Right. You got your directors, but who you
are the director's gonna direct if you ain't got no actors,
And what are they directing if you don't got no writers?
You know, reruns? I don't know. I don't know.
Speaker 2 (17:51):
Yeah, I think it's amazing that everybody's coming together and
supporting this because without everyone, like, we're not gonna have
all of our favorite shows and movies and everything.
Speaker 1 (18:00):
And some people would like to say, like one of
my friends is like, what y'all dripping out?
Speaker 2 (18:03):
Five?
Speaker 1 (18:03):
Y' all you actors, y'all making all this money, y'all
popping Why are you even doing this? Like, y'all make
more money than the average person. Why are you doing this?
It's like, first of all, the average actor is making
less than minimum wage. I was that average actor for
a long long time. I remember one of my first
gigs it still shows on TV and now it's streaming.
(18:24):
And I got a check about five months ago for
one cent that it cost them more money to print
that checkup, put it in an envelope and mail it
to me, and it cost me more money to drive
to the bank and try to cash it. Four years ago,
I got a check from another project I did. It
was for like two or three cents, and I thought
(18:46):
it would be funny to walk into the bank and cashy.
Do you know that they told me that check bounce.
They didn't have a three cents and they god, well,
you mean they ain't got the three cents? Oh yeah,
the account don't even work. So they sent me a
check for three cents to something that don't even exists
no more.
Speaker 2 (19:00):
That's insane.
Speaker 1 (19:01):
Do you know how much the gas was to get
to that thing? This is before I had an electric vehicle.
Speaker 2 (19:07):
Lord, that's insane.
Speaker 1 (19:10):
It's sad. It's that And it costs them so much
money to send that to me, and they shouldn't even
send it to me. But I still got the check.
I should post it. I should post all these little
bitty checks. I kept them all because to me, it
was like a sign of respect. Like and I just
feel like, if you're making money off of my talent, right,
(19:31):
and as long as you're making money off my talent,
I should be making money off my talent too. And
you know that that's how you get down, Like I'm
gonna just be using me and use me and use
me and don't bring nothing to the table. You can't
use me up like I gotta eat too. If you eat,
and I should eat. If your family having a nice house,
I should have a basis something nice, something so. And
(19:53):
there's so many actors that do small parts. They player parts,
you know, and they signed that contract and they worked
that one day and they get paid this amount of
money for that day. But every time that it comes
on air, there's supposed to be some compensation. And once
it starts going to streaming, they can't try. Well, they could,
but they want. They say they can't, but they can
(20:15):
because how are you gonna tell me this is the
number one movie on this on the streaming service, so
this is the number one TV show, This is the
thing everybody's watching. How are you able to tell me that?
But you can't tell me how many views there are.
You could tell me how many views there are, and
you can compensate me accordingly, even if it is two cents.
Speaker 2 (20:37):
It's so insane.
Speaker 1 (20:38):
Yeah, I I don't know why they don't direct deposit.
Don't get me started on that. Don't get me started
on that. But that's just a small bit of the
major issue.
Speaker 2 (20:47):
Mm hm. Well, I like that you speak about it.
Speaker 1 (20:49):
If it's streaming on a network, you're probably getting something.
If it's streaming on a streaming service, you should be
compensated for that. That was time of your life, that
was an experience you had. They was using your facial image.
And if they're advertising anything, if they're getting subscribers, and
you should be compensated for that. And I don't care
(21:10):
how much money you already got, you should be compensated.
They're using your image.
Speaker 2 (21:17):
Good to know. Let's look into that.
Speaker 1 (21:21):
Somebody in the logistics get to it, business affairs, hop
on it, please.
Speaker 2 (21:35):
So you were born and raised in LA. You're born
and raised in LA in south central What are your
earliest memories being there?
Speaker 1 (21:43):
My earliest memories, my earliest fondest memories is the playground
across the street from my mama house that was a
school and watching the other kids play and wanting to
go play with them, and trying across the street and
realizing that cars are dangerous and you can't just walk
across streets. Playing in the wading pool in the front yard,
(22:05):
playing with my neighbors. I used to love hanging out
in an avocado tree. We had an avocado tree in
the backyard, so I used to hang out in an
avocado tree and eat avocados. Or and I would walk
down to my grandma's house and she had a plum
tree and we would just hang out in a plum
tree and eat plums all day. I'm gonna tell you
right now, I was the I had the best moving
(22:26):
boughs in all of South Central Because if you eat
plums all day in the tree, guess what you're gonna
be at all night. You're gonna be on the toilet
all night. That's where you're gonna be. Yes, my stomach
was flat flat. I had to flyat apps. I had
apps as a little girl. Why because I ate plums
all day in the tree. I didn't even eat regular food.
I just wanted to eat the plums in the avocados.
(22:48):
And yeah, I had a very flat stomach.
Speaker 2 (22:52):
Love sad.
Speaker 1 (22:55):
I think that's gonna be my new workout plany. As
soon as my plum tree get big enough to hold me,
I'm gonna climb up in it and just eat the
plums up the tree summer.
Speaker 2 (23:05):
I love that. I haven't had one since I was little,
but now I want one.
Speaker 1 (23:10):
Okay, so my next harvest, which won't be told, Yeah, yeah,
I got plump trees.
Speaker 2 (23:16):
Themselves still.
Speaker 1 (23:17):
So I got my own plum trees because when I passed,
I wanted to be cremated, and I want my ashes
to be buried at the plum tree, and then everybody
who ever loved me, I want them to eat the
fruit from that tree a year later, because the plums
always come out in this summer, and the summertime it's
the best time. So yeah, nice, and I want to
be inside of them for twenty four hours and then
(23:38):
pass out of them and see what they do in
the ocean. It won't be me me, It'll be my vitamins,
nutrients and stuff. It both mostly be nitrogen, because that's
I think it's nitrogen. Yeah when you yeah, it's nitrogen
when you the ashes. I don't have any day. Sorry,
plant stuff, I'm heavy, Yeah, I'm heavy in the plants
(23:59):
and stuff.
Speaker 2 (24:01):
I want to do that here, like build a little
like a garden. Yeah, I have like a sick area
that I was like those things that are like made
for gardens. But I just don't know what I'm doing.
Speaker 1 (24:11):
I can show you. I come out, I bring some
of my seeds. I don't even bring some of my
seed lings and show you how to do it, and like,
you don't have to put a whole lot of time.
You could have your sprinkling system set up. And I
know how to do that too. I know how to
set up a whole sprinkling system and then water themselves
and you just come out like two three times a week.
If there's weeds, pull the weeds. Talk to the plants.
(24:32):
I love talking to the plants and makes it so good.
I gotta bring you some honey.
Speaker 2 (24:35):
I got bees.
Speaker 1 (24:37):
I got bees, girl, bees in the trap with the honey.
Speaker 2 (24:40):
What you're like simple life vibes?
Speaker 1 (24:43):
Yeah, yeah, but it's complicated life. But it's simple. It's
simply complicated. That's what it is. It's simply complicated.
Speaker 2 (24:50):
That's so fun.
Speaker 1 (24:51):
I gotta show you the bees. You got COMLM. I
bring you to the hood. Yeah, we'll bring security for you,
but I don't think you're gonna need it. Nah nah,
I got the whole block on lot.
Speaker 2 (25:00):
I love it. Yes, Okay, So when you were only
nine years old, your mom got in a car crash
which changed everything for your whole family. Can you tell
our listeners what happened?
Speaker 1 (25:12):
So basically, we moved. So my mom got married to
this man and she had kids buy them, and he
moved us from La to Promona and then from Promona
to Colton, which is like far and my mom worked
the graveyard shift at the US Post Office in Marina
(25:32):
del Ray, so she would leave. We would have to
leave the house like once we got out of school,
do our homeworking stuff. And then she'd be like, okay,
everybody get in a car and we would drive all
the way to La and she would drop me off
and me and my brothers and sisters off at my
grandma's house, and then she would continue on to work
at the post office and she would work all night
and then pick us up in the morning, like five
in the morning, six in the morning, and then we
(25:54):
drive all the way back to Colton and I would
go to school, and that was like the routine. In
one particular day, I was just like, Mama, let me babysit, Like,
let me just babysit. I know how to make hot dogs,
I know how to make you know, I know how
to cook all the stuff. I know how to make
baby's bottles. Like my little sister, she was not even once.
She was like nine months and my little had little sister,
(26:17):
little brother at that time, and and she was like, okay,
I'm running late. So she left, and then she said
if I call the house. Before she left, she said,
if I call the house, the phone's gonna ring twice
and then I'm gonna hang up and I'm a call back,
and that's me answer the phone. Otherwise, do not answer
the phone. Three days go by, no call, no nothing,
(26:38):
he didn't come home. Nobody's coming home.
Speaker 2 (26:41):
So then you're alone with everyone.
Speaker 1 (26:43):
And I'm alone with my at that point in time,
two sisters and one brother at that point. And I
called my grandma and asked her if she's seen my mom.
And she goes, no, she never came over. I'm like, well,
she hasn't come home in three days. She's like, well,
you guys are buy yourself. I'm like, yeah, we buy ourselves.
Then I was like, we've low on food. We running
out of food. There's barely even more hot dogs we
got right though, I'm making rice. I'm making like you know,
(27:05):
the top rom and stuff. So I felt very proud
of myself because I could cook, which I had been
doing for a long time. But I'm not like, you know,
going main meals is whatever stuff. But and my grandma
called around, called around, and then nobody knew where my
mom was. She didn't show up to work. And then
she called my stepdad's family member and they said she's
(27:25):
at the hospital. What hospital she was at? Now, she
had a car accident. She's like, what, nobody? Why didn't
nobody tell me? Then then my grandma says, look, your
mom's in the hospital. I'm gonna go check on her.
And I'm gonna come check on y'all. And next thing
I know, my stepdad's there and he's like, comes in,
gets like paperwork and stuff, and he's out. He's like,
I'll be back and he's out. Oh and he left some.
He did bring some In and Out Burger though, And
(27:47):
I still to this day love In and Out burg anyways.
And if the In and Out Burger wants to pay
me to talk about how much I loved them, no, anyways,
so love it that double double animal stuff protest anyways. Yeah,
So cut to she had her head went through windshield,
(28:07):
she had to learn how to walk, talk, eat everything
all love her again. And I remember the day that
she came out of the hospital. The doctor was like,
you know, you're gonna have to be a big girl.
You know everything. You don't have to help your mom
a lot. You have to be a big girl and
help your mama. And you okay with that, I'll say, yeah,
I'm definitely okat that. I love my mommy like anything
my mommy taught me. I'm gonna teach my mommy like
you know. And I did everything anything that I could do,
(28:31):
I did it. And I tried my best to take
care of my sisters and brothers to take care of her.
It was not easy. It's very hard. I could not read, really,
I just I knew what, Like the way my brain
works is like, I knew what the word looked like.
I knew what words looked like, and I would assume
that's what it is. I know what McDonald's look like,
(28:52):
I know what Burger King looked like. Like things that
were marketed to me and shown to me constantly. I
knew those words. I know my name, I know what
that looks like. I know like with certain things. And
so it was really difficult because we ended up getting
food stamps, we ended up like on welfare and all
this stuff. And I knew how to count money. Though
I knew how to count, you can't it and I
(29:12):
still know how to count it down on them. I'm
I can't read that good, but I can count like
it ain't nobody business. And so I would get the
groceries and and I remember being like always being my
mama's cheerleader, and so, no, you could do it, Mama,
You could drive, you could do this, you could do that.
Like and when we had to leave from Colton, we
were getting evicted because couldn't pay the rent. No one,
(29:33):
we survived. And you know, by the time I was twelve,
I guess I wasn't the best mom. I wasn't the
best at it right. And my mom by then she
tried to get back with my stepdad and ended up
getting pregnant with my baby brother and gave birth to him.
And her mental her mental health was not good. I mean,
(29:53):
I don't know if you noticed, but if your head
go through a windshield, you're not gonna be the same always.
And she wasn't. And I was. I used to think
that a demon had got inside her body and like
took over my mama's body because she got so violent
and so mean, and I was just always trying to
figure out ways to make her laugh, like in order
(30:14):
not to get hit because she used to be really
good with her words, but once you have an accident
like that, it's very hard to communicate. And she would
get frustrated and like punch me and hit me and
all this stuff. And I was okay with it because
I loved her, like she is my mommy, like the
first person I ever loved. I don't know if I
loved her as much as I love my grandma, but
(30:36):
she was my first love, right, She's my everything. And
you say like earliest memories. I sometimes I can remember,
like when I think about her, I remember like being
like she would be breastfeeding me. I think that's the
gayest I ever been, and she she would be see
try to feel better, feel better. But like I I
(31:00):
can remember her feeding me and me looking up at
her and like just holding her cheek, or like playing
in her hair, and her smiling at me and staring
at me, and me staring back at her, like us
falling in love with you. You remember, I can remember that
when I think about her, like I'm thinking about her now,
like my little heart opens up and I can remember
(31:21):
just loving her. She was she is my love and
then like then my Grandmamber, my grandma always smiling. My
grandma smiles like the best smiling the world. When me
and my mom would get into it, my grandma would
be like, you leave out loud, and Grandma was like
my hero, come rescue me, and her smile is the
(31:42):
best smiling. She would hold me at home, like I
miss my grandma so much. That was my that's my
best friend. She's basically my first best friend. I make
sometimes I love her more than I love my mama.
You know, yeah, how about you?
Speaker 2 (31:57):
I love my mom's so munch. But my grandmother passed
away when she was sixty three, and she we were
so close, Like I lived with her for a year
when I was sent away. My parents sent me to
pump Springs for ninth grade and I lived with her,
and she was just like a force of nature. She
was just so inspiring to me and like I learned
(32:18):
so much of everything, and I felt like she was
like my second mom.
Speaker 1 (32:21):
Right I was wishing. I used to be asking my grandma,
why you gotta be my grandma, Why you can't be
my real mama? Like you don't hit me like she
hit me. You love me, and she's like your mama
love you too. That's just how she This is how
she's keeping you strong. Did you get.
Speaker 2 (32:37):
Spankings from my parents?
Speaker 1 (32:39):
Yeah? From anybody that was an authority over you. Did
you get spankings and whoopings? It's okay now it's statute limitation.
Speaker 2 (32:45):
My parents at Provocanian School and all those schools that
I got sent to, yes, they would like thank you,
strangle you, hit you, sexually abused, like those people are sick.
Speaker 1 (32:59):
Yeah, that's like being in the system. Now, that's being
you were. It was you were in the system. It's
like being in foster care.
Speaker 2 (33:05):
Seventy percent of the kids were either foster care or
in the system or from just the mental health words, children,
less disabilities, everything a lot.
Speaker 1 (33:17):
When I read your book, I was like booed to
the who win, Because I mean, we've had conversations and
we don't get too deep into it, but I can.
I get it and I connect with you immediately because
I know you because I stayed in group homes and
stuff because by the time I was twelve, but that
was it foster care, moving around from house to house, strangers,
(33:40):
group situations, trying to figure out how to fit in,
how do I maneuver in this world like it's all
like Hollywood is easy.
Speaker 2 (33:48):
Yeah, this is prepared.
Speaker 1 (33:50):
Never like, oh it's dangerous. I'm like, you have no
idea what danger is. But this is nothing.
Speaker 2 (33:55):
You're supposed to be somewhere. We're being protected, and these
people are taking advantage of their power doing the most
terrible things to a child.
Speaker 1 (34:04):
I'm like, do they do why don't they do? Do
they do mental exam I know you got to take
like mental tests to be in the FBI, right, you
got to have a certain mental capacity and stuff to
be in the FBI. I think, Okay, that's cute FBI
and all that, but you should have some some There
should be severe mental examinations and tests going and challenges
(34:24):
and all kind of stuff that are constantly happening every
year for these teachers, for these administrators, for these social workers.
So the freaking people that run the group homes that
these organizations that's supposed to be protecting you and teaching
you and mentor like, there should be some severe background
(34:45):
situation checks on them because that's where the damage is happening. Yeah,
that's what I really feel, like, like it's so true.
I mean, it's it's all right to say it, But
it's the motherfucker in the suit I'm looking at that
I'm concerned about that's probably gonna do something. The person
that's supposed to be the superhero I got your back,
(35:09):
that's probably the person that's gonna be the one that
do something really bad, as opposed to as opposed to
the one that's wearing the flashy colors and the weird
and they got weird stuff on it and booty cheeks
hanging out.
Speaker 2 (35:22):
They don't do background trucks like there's It really attracts
like pedophiles and sick people who want to have that power, sick,
super sick.
Speaker 1 (35:30):
Yeah, it's the one in the suit. Watch the one
in the suit.
Speaker 2 (35:34):
And of course they'll be like, oh, these kids are troubled,
they're this, like they're lying, and it's like the perfect
storm for someone because they're gonna get away with it.
Speaker 1 (35:40):
Oh my god, I remember this one lady. She wanted
to keep she wanted to keep this kid on drugs,
on the medication. The kid didn't need to medicate. Kids like,
I'm not depressed, I'm not this, I'm not all all
these things. You keep telling them, that's not who I am.
We were teenagers, and it was because they get more
money if you are on medication, the false appearance or whatever.
(36:02):
That lady was a coordinator. We were in this group.
They get more money if you're on nets. If they
have to minige the medication to you, they get make
more money. So they want to keep you on the drugs.
It's like, I don't need these drugs. I just need
somebody to help me with my homework. That's all I mean.
Somebody helped me with my homemak. That's what they kept
on saying it. They kept on saying it, and this
lady was kept on trying to shut drugs down them.
(36:24):
They even say they want to give me some drugs.
But I taught to social worker, I'm allergic to drugs.
I don't want to if I have a mental problem,
I'd rather just sit and talk to somebody, and talk
to somebody and talk to somebody. I'm allergic to drugs.
Now Here I am thirty years later. You know, I
ain't on drugs. With drugs, I'm like, I smoke weed
(36:45):
and I do drink alcohol. That's my drug a choice.
But when I turn seventy, I'm doing drug car I'm
doing all the shit when I turn seventy. That's the
future conversation. I'm gonna be hot in up at seventy.
That's what it makes sense to be highest. I mean,
my knee's gonna be bad, my elbows, I ain't gonna
like what I was see in the mirror that much.
So I'm gonna get high. I'm gonna be high as
(37:06):
hell in my estate walking around butt nagga and I'm
like Timy on the street. But Nigga, oh yeah, she old,
she an old lady. She old don't pay her no attention.
That's that old people's stuff. That's what I'm gonna be doing.
I'm getting st up at seventy.
Speaker 2 (37:19):
All right, this has been the most fun time I've
ever had on this podcast. I've never left so hard.
I love hanging out. Love hanging up with you too,
sween friends for so many years. Now. Do you remember
the first time that we met.
Speaker 1 (37:33):
I remember the first time I ever met you. This
was back in early two thousands, and I was trying
to get into your section but I couldn't get into
the section, but you were super sweet. I had started
a big old dance circle we was at. I want
to say coca that tea seris, remember coking that, Just
say it's coking that teas. And I had started a
big old dance circle and I was dancing the middle
(37:55):
circle and you had came out. You was like yeah,
god yeah. I was like yeah, dancing. And then I
will see you here and there at different events and stuff,
but I never bothered you. And then Harper's Bizarre A Party,
I was there, you were there. I think I was
wearing white. I think you were wearing like an off
(38:15):
white or something like that, or maybe it was you
was wearing a cute dress. I just remember it was
a cute ass dress.
Speaker 2 (38:19):
Honey, I'm always in a cute trap. Facts.
Speaker 1 (38:23):
Facts, you are always in a cute dress. And we
were having a good time and you were like, I
love you. I love you make me laugh so hard,
and I feel like that was the first time we
really connected. And I was like, I love you. You are
so smart. And I wanted to fangirl out and be
like I got all your perfume, I got all your makeup,
I got all your stuff, but I didn't want to
like be too much of a groupie Liot.
Speaker 2 (38:46):
Was to talk to you. I was like oh my god.
Speaker 1 (38:48):
I love her, and I didn't want to be like
a finger and I would have and now I know
that you would have loved that, but I didn't. Like
I didn't want to be the annoying like fan and
I wanted to be like your best friend. But I
was like, I'm gonna be chill. I'm not gonna and
I'm not gonna be like aggressive with her. But I
was like, and I know I had said something to
the face. You was like, oh, I like your should
you wear teeny shoes? I like it goes with the
(39:09):
dress and everything. I was like, yeah, Greg got each
shoes on my feet hurt. I can't be having my
feet all messed up out here. And he was like
that is so smart. That's so smart. And I was like, no,
you're so smart, and and then we were like laughing,
and my stylist had came up and you started talking
to him, and then we were walking away and I
was just like, we're gonna be friends, and he was
like yeah, guy, And I was like, oh, she think
(39:31):
I'm playing and we've been friends. No, And I love you.
Speaker 2 (39:36):
I love you me too. I could literally sit and
talk with you all day and night. Because you're literally
the most entertaining, sweetest, kindest. I had no idea about
so many things you just told me. I'm like in
all of you. You're so strong, you're so incredible, You're
(39:58):
such a beautiful person, you have such a big heart,
and like I love you so much.
Speaker 1 (40:03):
I love you so much. Thank you for inviting me
once again.
Speaker 2 (40:10):
Yes we have to do that after this. All right, guys,
I hope you enjoyed well. I know you did, and
we will see you for the next episode, which will
be about the present living. Thanks for listening to I
Am Paris. Don't forget to follow us on Instagram at
I Am Paris podcast, email us at Paris at iHeartRadio
dot com, be hot and subscribe now loves It.
Host
Paris Hilton
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