This is The Zone of Disruption! This is the I AM RAPAPORT: STEREO PODCAST! His name is Michael Rapaport aka The Gringo Mandingo aka The Monster of Mucous aka Captain Colitis aka The Disruptive Warrior aka Mr. NY aka The Inflamed Ashkenazi aka The Smiling Sultan of Sniff aka The Flat Footed Phenom is here to discuss: Swamp Ass September, upcoming stand up comedy dates, Breaking Bad streaming & picketting on Strike, Scammers Gonna Scam, watching Real Housewives of SLC in SLC, Football being back, needing to get off the sneaker game, having children in their 20s, his ON running sneakers review, X is a cesspool & right hook kooky freak heroes, Proud Boys being arrested, Tucker Carlson's latest episode, Sick F*ck of the Week, Antisemitism trending on X & a whole lotta mo'! This episode is not to be missed!
Stand Up Comedy Tickets on sale at: MichaelRapaportComedy.com
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:11):
Yes, Brander banging Iron Rap Report Stereo podcast this year.
May he have no fear on today's Iron Rapp Report
Stereo podcasts. One of the sickest sick fuck incidents of
all time. Somebody shut up diarrhea a plane from Atlanta
to Barcelona. I break that down. Plus the NFL is back,
Fantasy Football is back, Get your mind, get your body,
(00:33):
get your soul in check? And why is anti Semitism
trending on Twitter all the time? All that morning, hard hitting,
fully disruptive, museum quality Iron Rapp Reports Stereo pocket is
coming up right now. Miles Jordan Ak the Bleach Brothers
aka the Diggity Dust Brothers respectfully start this puppy off
with something real nice. Start this puppy off with something
(00:55):
real out. But Miles, start this puppy off with something
real real funky and turn it up a little bit.
This is the Iron Rappaport Stereo podcast. That's fucking big gum.
Speaker 2 (01:07):
Boom boom, yeah oh yeah a biggy boom yeah boom.
Speaker 1 (01:25):
Have no fear the Iron Rapp Reports Stereo podcast here,
Have no fear of the I Am Rapaport Stereo podcast
is in the place to be one two three, in
the place to.
Speaker 2 (01:38):
Be.
Speaker 1 (01:40):
Hope everybody's feeling good. Hope everybody's feeling safe. Hope everybody's
feeling sane. Hope everybody is staying cool. Because it is hot,
swamp ass hot in September. It is swamp ass hot
in September. I am on the road. I am in
(02:07):
beautiful Salt Lake City, Utah, Utah, doing shows all weekend
at Wise Guys Comedy. Busy, busy, busy, busy, busy, busy
month for me, the gringo man Dingo, me, the inflamed
Ashkenazi me, the disruptive warrior, me, the Sultan of sniff. Busy, busy,
(02:32):
busy month, and I'm blessed and fortunate to be so
God damn busy. Shouldn't say goddamn well, I'm in Salt
Lake City. I don't know what. I don't want to
offend anybody. I don't want to offend anybody, But I
am finishing out a great weekend of shows in Salt
Lake City. Then the fourteenth, fifteenth, and sixteenth, I'm gonna
(02:55):
be in Stanford, Connecticut at New York City Comedy Club,
the New York's City Comedy Club in Stanford Connecticut, and
then I will be in American Comedy in San Diego.
I believe it's the third time I'm performing at that
great club. I love that club in San Diego. Small
intimate crowds there with me. I'm with them, everybody's with everybody.
(03:22):
Then we're going to Pittsburgh the twenty ninth and the
thirtieth at City Winery in Pittsburgh, the twenty ninth and
the thirtieth of September, and then the sixth and the seventh.
I will be in Atlanta the sixth and the seventh
of October. Then the twentieth and the twenty first, I
(03:43):
will be in Chicago. Oh yeah, Oh fucking yeah. All
tickets for all of my shows through September, October, November,
and into December are available now at Michael rappaport Comedy
dot com Michael Roppaport Comedy dot com. Come see me September, October, November, December,
(04:08):
and who knows. I'm lucky to be on the road
because the Screen Actors Guild Slash Writers Guild WGA SAG
respectfully strikes unfortunately do not do not seem like they're
(04:31):
stopping anytime soon, which is fucking ridiculous. Man, it is
fucking ridiculous. And I don't want to go into the
minutia of the who, what, when, where, why. But the
show Breaking Bad is currently being streamed I know on Netflix,
(04:57):
probably watched all the time, just like the show Suits
for some reason is some huge hit. The show Suits,
which was a not a big TV show, it did well,
is streaming. I believe on Peacock. Megan Markle did a
few seasons on Suits. She might have been on it
the whole time. I don't know, I don't care. I
(05:19):
could give a fuck Jesus Christ. The point is is
that Aaron Paul, Brian Cranston, everybody that acted in Suits,
everybody that acted in Breaking Bad, everybody that acts on
all the shows and all the streamers do not get paid.
(05:42):
People are rewatching the Sopranos, people are rewatching Friends, people
are rewatching How I Met Your Mother and every single
other show. The actors do not get paid like this
show Suits for some reason, like I said, is a
dominant show for I believe Peacock, Who cares and the
(06:04):
actors aren't getting paid. The writers don't get paid, the
directors don't get paid. Every time it gets rewatched. That's
one of the main reasons why we are on strike.
We gotta do what we gotta do to get the
fucking union back. Unfortunately, it's just not happening. It's not
happening yet. But we just have to stand in the pocket,
(06:30):
be patient. But I know a lot of people are
fucked up. A lot of people are fucked up because
of this strike. It's not good. It's not good, and
it's just gonna get worse. And I know it's scary.
It sucks to not know when you're not gonna work again.
And like I said before, do not think that everybody
is Timothy Shamalama Ding Dong. Do not think that everybody
(06:51):
is George Clooney or Jennifer Lawrence. Respectfully, that is not
the case for ninety nine point nine per of actors.
And it's not just about the actors, it's about the
the writers. Not everybody is it's a guy's name who
wrote Larry David. Not everybody is what's my guy's name
(07:15):
who wrote this? Whatever, it ain't what you think it is,
trust me anyway, fantastic. I am rap por stereo podcast
coming live and direct. Like I said, it's hot all
over the country hot, swamp ass hot, but that's part
(07:36):
for the course. It's still September. Just you know, you
don't want to sweat it out. You don't want leaky ass. Sorry.
I know it's disgusting, but that's what happens during swamp
ass season. I will say that it was great to
(07:56):
be in Salt Lake City and watch the premiere episode
of the Real Housewives of Salt Lake City. I gotta
tell you, and I'm not gonna don't get don't freak out,
gonna be quick with this. I'm gonna be quick with this.
But what a cast of kooky characters of course.
Speaker 2 (08:18):
Uh.
Speaker 1 (08:18):
The star of the Real Housewives of Salt Lake City
is currently in prison. She's in the same prison as
the woman the Theoran Nose woman, the woman who went
to jail for scamming the shit out of scamming man.
Scammer's gonna scam. Scammers are gonna scam. And you may
(08:43):
think shit is sweet. You may be buying yourself motorcycles
and burking bags and who the funk knows shoes, colognes, trips, houses,
but they're gonna catch you. Scamming is just like drug dealing.
(09:03):
You're either gonna wind up in jail. Well, you're probably
not gonna wind up bad from scamming, but you're gonna
wind up in jail. Most likely they're gonna get your ass.
Might it might not be quick, You might have a
nice thing going, but sooner or later they are going
to catch the government. Don't fuck around defense, you don't
(09:27):
want that fed time. They got the great Genshaw from
the Real Housewives of Salt Lake City. I say that
only on her performance in real life. Scammer, it's a
fucking scammer. They got that thorough nosed chick in that
same prison. But that Genshaw, my god, she was great
(09:50):
on the Real Housewives of Salt Lake City and the
Real Housewives of Salt Lake City. They got one of
the wackiest motherfuckers I've ever seen on television. Back my girl,
Mary Cosby. She's a funk. She is great. Out of
her fucking mind. They brought her back for season four
of the Real Housewives of Salt Lake City. And you
(10:11):
don't know what's gonna come out of her mouth. You
don't know if she's being genuine, you don't know if
she's being sarcastic. You don't know what the fuck the
great Mary Cosby is talking about. It's coming from left field,
right field, center field, it's coming from the bleachers, it's
coming from and off the top rope. She's fantastic. That's
(10:34):
all I'm gonna say. That's all i'm gonna say. But
I'm gonna tell you that the Real Housewives of Salt
Lake City and me being in Utah doing shows this
weekend at wise, guys watching it, I fell closer to
the action. I felt like I could feel them. I
could feel them in the air. I can feel it
coming in the air tonight. To quote the great Phil Collins.
Speaker 3 (10:58):
NFL's here.
Speaker 1 (11:16):
Oh my god, it was so good. It was so
good to see the Detroit Lions and the Kansas City Chiefs.
It was so good to see. Yo. I don't know
if you guys watched the game on what was it Amazon?
Speaker 2 (11:37):
Yo?
Speaker 1 (11:38):
They're on some techmobile shit, They're on some video game ship.
Now when you watch the game, I think it's a
little much overkill. But they got uh was it Amazon?
Was it YouTube? I don't know. With Thursday Night Football,
they got all kinds of shit going out out there,
Prime vision, you know, with the lines and the computers
(12:02):
and the predictions and who's gonna who's gonna blitz and
who's gonna kick, and who's gonna run and who's gonna fall.
You know, in twenty years, you're literally gonna be able
to see from the vantage point of the next Patrick
Mahomeboy or the next Tom Brady or whoever, because the
(12:24):
way shit is looking now with this AI technology for
the games is insane, is insane. But we're back. We're back,
and there's gonna be a lot of confusion because, uh,
the games are only on YouTube TV. I cut the
fucking chord. I'm glad I cut the fucking chord now,
(12:46):
truth be told, it's still a little confusing as to
how it's gonna go down and the red Zone and
the channels, and it's gonna be a little learning curve.
And I know Sunday there's a lot of people that
didn't cut the cord. There's a lot of people that
didn't sign up for YouTube TV are gonna be trying
to watch Red Zone or Fantasy Zone or this game
or that game or NFL ticket whatever. It's so it's
(13:09):
a little it's a little much. There's so many apps,
but it's going down. It is going down. I am
wishing everybody that listens to the I Am rap Port
Stereo podcast the most luck in your fantasy football season.
Beat the shit out of whoever you're playing, talk shit relentlessly,
and if you happen to lose, if you happen to lose,
(13:34):
and if you go to captain picks dot com, I
don't think you should lose most of the time. Listen,
nobody's gonna go undefeated in fantasy football. Nobody's gonna go
undefeated when you're taking and making that action betting on
NFL College cross soccer, MMA, UFC whenever. But if you
(14:01):
want to put yourself in the best position to win
the majority of the time, go to captain picks dot com.
Captain picks dot com, think me later, you funk you.
One thing you can also think me later is now.
You guys know I've talked about my obsession with my Jordan's.
(14:26):
I'm stopped. I've stopped. There's no more. I'm not buying anymore.
I got enough. I'm done. I'm gonna be fifty four
in March. Although I am a cool, dope new millennial
fifty four, meaning that motherfucker like me I make fifty
four cool, like, I'm not gonna be dressed up. I've
(14:49):
always been fascinated by that. Like, when my generation and
the generation behinds me gets older, we're not gonna be
wearing our little old man suits. No disrespect, but you
can't be dressing up looking like, you know, Gumby. Also,
you know they got those those Gumby shoes. Everybody's wearing
(15:09):
those red Mickey mouse joints. I don't know what the
fuck those are, but I think inevitably when I'm like
seventy five, which fuck, man, that's that's almost that's twenty
one years away. God damn it, Holy fucking shit. My
(15:30):
son's twenty one, my other son's twenty three. Twenty one
years is not. Oh my god, damn it. Hole, Yo,
you got Holy fuck. I gotta make the most of
the next twenty seventy five years old. What the fuck
is that? Let me stay focused? Holy shit, Holy fucking shit.
(15:53):
Let me stay focused. When I'm seventy five years old,
I'm probably gonna go back to wearing New Balance all
the time. I still wear my New Balance a lot
of the time. I'm although I you know, I still
rock my I rock my Jordan's that's not the point.
The point is that my friend Toby, he's gotten into running,
so he's got all kinds of different running sneakers, okay,
(16:13):
And he suggested that I get a pair of these
on O N running sneakers. He said, they're super comfortable.
They're light. Ba ba ba ba bah. So I got
a pair of these on running sneakers o N the
Cloud shoes, Okay, and they're light. It's different, you know, Bapa.
(16:37):
I see a lot of fucking people wearing them, like
maybe maybe they're maybe they're enjoying their comfort more than me.
Fuck my on running sneakers. First of all, they're too expensive.
Number two, they've worn out quickly. Number three, number three okay,
my cloud on running sneakers. They sqush, they squeak. I
(17:00):
hear them when I'm walking. I hear them when I
am walking down the street. Okay. And it's not my knees.
I posted a video. Someone was like, Yo, it's probably
your knees, your old fuck you knock on wood. Fortunately,
my knees are good knock on wood. Because once those
fucking knees go, I got enough problems. I got enough
(17:25):
fucking problems. I don't need my knees giving out. I
really don't. So it wasn't my knees, this fucking sneaker,
and it wasn't the rain, it wasn't the dampness. I've
had them for a couple of months now, two months.
They fucking squish man s. I don't like it. I
(17:47):
got enough things that I'm annoyed about. I got enough
things that I don't like to hear, especially walking when
you're in New York City. There's sirens, there's there's fucking explosions,
there's jackhammers. And let me tell you something, shout out
to all my construction workers in New York City. When
I see my construction workers and they go mic rap
I went over to a dude the other day. Was
(18:08):
hot as funk. He said, Mike Ramp fuck Trump, I said, yo.
I walked across the street to him. My maya put
down the jackcamer. I gave him a pen, and I
was like, how you doing. But because I'm like, yo,
this that's a man. My dude had a jackcamer in
his hand. He he was sweating like a fucking pink
with a smile on his face, busting his ASTs. I said,
(18:32):
you're a You're a fucking man. Shout out to everybody
who's working hard. Okay, Shout out to everybody that's grinding
and out doing what they gotta do to take care
of themselves, take care of their families. I know I'm blessed,
and I know my job. My work is easy compared
(18:53):
to what motherfuckers have to do to make a living. Okay.
Shout out to all you guys worldwide. Girls. When I
say guys, I mean everybody collectively. I don't don't start
no shit with me, start no shit with me anyway.
The point is is that you know all these these
high falutin New Age sneakers, and they got the ons
(19:15):
and this one's and the super clouds and the super
duper clouds and the clouds and the rainbows, Old faithful
works New Balance is the most comfortable walking, slash running,
slash casual shoe period period. And now they finally, for
(19:36):
some reason, they got some better styles and some colors
and all that, but them on shoes. Any of you
guys fall into the trap of going away from old
New Balance is the shoe, but any is anybody else
got these on shoes to your on shoes? Ye cloud
(19:57):
joint sqush because mind fucking sqush whish squish when I'm
walking and I don't like it. That's my review and
I'm sticking to it. This is happening. I don't know why.
I don't know why. Sometimes I go on X, which
is it's just a cesspool of shit Twitter X. It's
(20:22):
a cess pool of dog shit. It's just mountains and
mountains of dog shit. And the and the hero, the
hero of the the right wing cookie freaks. Well, one
of the heroes is, of course Alex Jones, who the
right wing cookie freaks. They just they'll go. Alex Jones
(20:43):
was right, but he wasn't right. He wasn't right about
Sandy Hook, was he. That's the one that he he
wasn't right about. Huh. That's the old thorn in the
side for Alex Jones. Huh, Sandy Hook. That's the one
that fucked you, Alex Jones. But these people they just
(21:04):
love him, they love Don't you have any other people
to idolize besides the proud boys who just got sentenced.
Enrique Torrio, the proud boy. How's that gonna work out
for you? Proud boy Enrique? Now that you're in jail
because you ain't white. You ain't white. Now, I don't
(21:27):
know how that's gonna work out with you in prison.
The majority besides yourself of the Proud Boys are white,
and you are just I mean the Proud Boys and
the other Proud Boy who got arrested for January six,
eighteen years good lock them all the fuck up. But
(21:48):
I mean, these guys, you go to Twitter, you might
as well. They might as well build statues for the
Proud Boys that are in jail, For Alex Jones, for
Tucker Carlson. Tucker Carlson who had a guy on his
new Twitter show that looks like he literally he literally
(22:12):
crawled out of a fucking like he just got out
of a method one clinic. Looked like he's missing teeth.
Tucker Carlson, mister mister a fucking news guy. Mister guy
who says he doesn't he doesn't like politics. He doesn't,
he doesn't follow politics, he doesn't like talking about politics.
But all he does is have people on his show
(22:36):
to discuss politics. He had a guy on there and
goddamn that fucking shit box Twitter went crazy. Guy on there,
that's a legend that he had sex, gay sex with
President Barack Obama. B Rock. Now, let me tell you something.
(22:58):
This toothless freak, I think his name's Barry who's saying
he had sex with b Rock. I don't care if
Barack Obama's smoking crack, which is what the guy is saying.
I don't care if Barack Obama is game. If you
think Barack Obama on his worst day would funk this
(23:19):
toothless white trash piece of shit that's saying he had
sex with Barack Obama. Let me tell you something, Homy,
Tucker Carlson and all this shit, If Barack Obama was
trying to freak off, the last person he would be
trying to freak off with was the guy you had
(23:40):
on your show, Tucker Carlson. Did you guys watch it?
I didn't watch it. I couldn't. This guy looks like
he's been displaced. He's been arrested for various crime, scamming, scheming,
and then somehow, some way, Tucker Carlson, who says he
doesn't like talking about politics, has a guy on his
(24:04):
show that is a legend. He had sex with b
Rock what in nineteen ninety nine and they were doing
crack that Lawrence Taylor, that's Samuel Jackson, that Hunter Biden
and Twitter, and they should build a fucking statue for
Alex Jones, for Tucker Carlson and the Proud Boys. They
(24:25):
love these fucking guys adoration, They suck them off. They
love these fucking guys. Alex Jones was right about everything, right,
so you say, except for standy hook. That's the one
thing he wasn't right about. You fucking losers, you freaks,
(24:46):
You sick focks. Which brings me to one of the
sickest sick funk incidents I've ever heard of. I have
gotten multi requests to talk about a sick funk on
a flight, and I always say that the majority of
(25:06):
flights where incidents happen are the short flights. Okay, uh,
that is where it goes down Atlanta to Philly, Philly
to Dallas. It could be uh, you know, Chicago to Phoenix. However,
(25:30):
there was a flight that was forced to land going
from Atlanta to Barcelona. I imagine you. I've never been
to Barcelona, but but I've been on vacation, been to Italy,
been to Thailand, in Hawaii, South America, right, Argentina, but
(25:55):
new A couple of I'm not. I'm not the big
world traveler that you would expect the man who hosts
the world's most disruptive podcast, The World's most disruptive podcast.
You would think, Oh, oh, Mike, crap, you've been everywhere.
I haven't. I gotta fix that before I'm seventy five, Babe.
I just realized that in twenty one years, almost twenty
(26:19):
one years, I'm gonna be seventy five years old. That
ain't fucking cool. My son twenty one years old and
then twenty one years went quick. Gotta fucking enjoy it
while you can. Nonetheless, if you're heading to Barcelona in
(26:42):
the summer, you're either going to vacation coming back from vacation.
Barcelona sounds like a beautiful place Spain. You're going from
Atlanta to Barcelona on your trip that you probably saved
a lot of money to go on and lo and
behold some sick fuck And I know, I'm sure this
(27:04):
wasn't on purpose, and know it wasn't me. Some people
are like, Yo, my crap, was this you? No? I
shit outside, Duke. I don't shit on planes. I'll say
that again. I shit outside, I don't shit on I'll
shit in the bathroom on a plane. That's not the point.
Some people are like, Yo, Duke, were you on the
plane from Atlanta to Barcelona? A plane had to land
(27:30):
from Atlanta to Barcelona because some animal shat on the plane.
And I don't mean in the bathroom this. I don't
know what happened. I have compassion for these people. I
have ulter of colitis. I am currently in remission. Thank God.
Shout out to all my people that know somebody that
(27:52):
has a l sort of colius Crohn's disease. You know
what it is. I'll leave it at that. But my
people that have that, we know how to find and
get to a bathroom. Somebody couldn't find and get themselves
(28:12):
to a bathroom on this flight from a Landa to
Barcelona and shat all up and down the aisles. I know,
I know you're probably puking in your mouth. I know
you probably saying, Mike Crap, Yo chill, I'm eating Yo,
mic Wrap, I'm at work, watch listening to you. Mike Wrap.
I'm driving, Mike Wrap, I'm pulled over in my car.
(28:33):
Mike Rap, I'm trying to sleep. Mike crap. Why are
you saying this? I don't make this shit up, no
pun intended. I just reported, I don't make this shit up.
I just reported, homie shut up and down the aisles
of the plane. Can you imagine the fear, the panic,
(28:57):
the fright, Well, you're being a man or a woman.
They haven't, they haven't out of this person who shat
up and down the aisles of a plane. But they
had to land the plane. Of course. Information is still
pouring in again, diarrhea pouring no pun intended, huh, but
(29:18):
there were They had to land it because what they
call it biohazard. Yo, you shipped the plane. That's biohazard, dude,
you ship because they got carpet, they got those those
leather seats, they got plastic. I'm surprised it didn't go
from this man or woman again hasn't been identified. I'm
(29:41):
surprised other people didn't start throwing up in the aisles
because it's a what do you call it effect? It's
a what kind of effect, ship, whatever effect, whatever effect
it is. I'm just glad that people made it off
(30:03):
the plane and whatever kind of effect from somebody diarrhe
ing and then one person throwing up and the other
person throwing up everybody made it off this infected bio.
I mean, what do you do with a plane like that?
Do you remodel it? Like, what do you have to do?
And can you imagine the fear and the chaos. And
there's probably kids on the plane, and there's probably Spanish
(30:25):
speaking people on the plane and Americans on the and
everybody's just going, I mean, it's just a true shit fling. Finally,
(30:52):
there was again on Twitter. I gotta get off that
fucking Twitter. It's garbage. There was anti Semitism was was
trending the other day for the whole day. I think
it started because somebody at the US Open, while one
of the players was playing, who was German, shouted out,
(31:15):
I believe hail Hitler. He screamed that to the German player,
and the German player told the referee somebody just screamed
out the most popular phrase that Adolf Hitler ever used.
He didn't repeat it, and the referee said, find that person.
(31:37):
Then they threw the person out. They should have beat
him up, and anti Semitism was trending for the next
twenty four hours. It's always trending, but it's always being discussed.
What's anti Semitic, what's not anti Semitic, or what's anti
Jewish and what's not anti Jewish. It's always being discussed
by non Jews. We'll let you know what we don't like.
(32:02):
We'll let you know what we find offensive. We'll speak
on behalf of ourselves. We don't need a bunch of
goys respectfully goam respectfully explaining what we should and shouldn't
be offended about. You never do that with the black people,
(32:27):
the African Americans, yet you want to keep the Jewish
people's names out your mouth. If we get offended, we
get offended, all right, And if you get offended by
us getting offended, that's your problem, you funk. You you
understand if we get offended, we get offended. We'll let
(32:47):
you know what we deem as offensive. We don't need
you cracker ass crackers diagnosing and judging and scoring and
debating on what we think is offensive. I said it once,
I've said it many many times. Keep the Jewish people's
(33:11):
names out your fucking mouth. God damn it, it's almost
rushing Shana for crying out loud. It's the high Holidays,
you fucks. We ain't doing this this year on you
know what we were doing last year on the high holidays,
dealing with fucking Kookie Kane. Wis we not doing it
again this year? We not doing it again this year?
(33:34):
You focks you. Domino effect is what it is. Domino effect.
That's what I meant. On the plane, one person throws up,
the next person throws up, calling a domino effect. Anyway,
I'm done, Okay. I hope everybody has a great, great
rest of the weekend. I hope everybody really stays cool.
(33:58):
I hope everybody stays safe, stay safe, and definitely however
you do it, because there ain't just one way to
be disruptive. My wigh's my way. I hope everybody stays disruptive.
Miles to ordn Ak, the Bleach Brothers aka the Dust
Brothers respectfully, take me out of here with something real nicess,
(34:19):
take me out of here with something real loud, yes,
but most importantly, end this puppy with something real funky.
It's the im Rappaport stereo punk is I'm out
Yes, Brander banging Iron Rap Report Stereo podcast this year.
May he have no fear on today's Iron Rapp Report
Stereo podcasts. One of the sickest sick fuck incidents of
all time. Somebody shut up diarrhea a plane from Atlanta
to Barcelona. I break that down. Plus the NFL is back,
Fantasy Football is back, Get your mind, get your body,
(00:33):
get your soul in check? And why is anti Semitism
trending on Twitter all the time? All that morning, hard hitting,
fully disruptive, museum quality Iron Rapp Reports Stereo pocket is
coming up right now. Miles Jordan Ak the Bleach Brothers
aka the Diggity Dust Brothers respectfully start this puppy off
with something real nice. Start this puppy off with something
(00:55):
real out. But Miles, start this puppy off with something
real real funky and turn it up a little bit.
This is the Iron Rappaport Stereo podcast. That's fucking big gum.
Speaker 2 (01:07):
Boom boom, yeah oh yeah a biggy boom yeah boom.
Speaker 1 (01:25):
Have no fear the Iron Rapp Reports Stereo podcast here,
Have no fear of the I Am Rapaport Stereo podcast
is in the place to be one two three, in
the place to.
Speaker 2 (01:38):
Be.
Speaker 1 (01:40):
Hope everybody's feeling good. Hope everybody's feeling safe. Hope everybody's
feeling sane. Hope everybody is staying cool. Because it is hot,
swamp ass hot in September. It is swamp ass hot
in September. I am on the road. I am in
(02:07):
beautiful Salt Lake City, Utah, Utah, doing shows all weekend
at Wise Guys Comedy. Busy, busy, busy, busy, busy, busy
month for me, the gringo man Dingo, me, the inflamed
Ashkenazi me, the disruptive warrior, me, the Sultan of sniff. Busy, busy,
(02:32):
busy month, and I'm blessed and fortunate to be so
God damn busy. Shouldn't say goddamn well, I'm in Salt
Lake City. I don't know what. I don't want to
offend anybody. I don't want to offend anybody, But I
am finishing out a great weekend of shows in Salt
Lake City. Then the fourteenth, fifteenth, and sixteenth, I'm gonna
(02:55):
be in Stanford, Connecticut at New York City Comedy Club,
the New York's City Comedy Club in Stanford Connecticut, and
then I will be in American Comedy in San Diego.
I believe it's the third time I'm performing at that
great club. I love that club in San Diego. Small
intimate crowds there with me. I'm with them, everybody's with everybody.
(03:22):
Then we're going to Pittsburgh the twenty ninth and the
thirtieth at City Winery in Pittsburgh, the twenty ninth and
the thirtieth of September, and then the sixth and the seventh.
I will be in Atlanta the sixth and the seventh
of October. Then the twentieth and the twenty first, I
(03:43):
will be in Chicago. Oh yeah, Oh fucking yeah. All
tickets for all of my shows through September, October, November,
and into December are available now at Michael rappaport Comedy
dot com Michael Roppaport Comedy dot com. Come see me September, October, November, December,
(04:08):
and who knows. I'm lucky to be on the road
because the Screen Actors Guild Slash Writers Guild WGA SAG
respectfully strikes unfortunately do not do not seem like they're
(04:31):
stopping anytime soon, which is fucking ridiculous. Man, it is
fucking ridiculous. And I don't want to go into the
minutia of the who, what, when, where, why. But the
show Breaking Bad is currently being streamed I know on Netflix,
(04:57):
probably watched all the time, just like the show Suits
for some reason is some huge hit. The show Suits,
which was a not a big TV show, it did well,
is streaming. I believe on Peacock. Megan Markle did a
few seasons on Suits. She might have been on it
the whole time. I don't know, I don't care. I
(05:19):
could give a fuck Jesus Christ. The point is is
that Aaron Paul, Brian Cranston, everybody that acted in Suits,
everybody that acted in Breaking Bad, everybody that acts on
all the shows and all the streamers do not get paid.
(05:42):
People are rewatching the Sopranos, people are rewatching Friends, people
are rewatching How I Met Your Mother and every single
other show. The actors do not get paid like this
show Suits for some reason, like I said, is a
dominant show for I believe Peacock, Who cares and the
(06:04):
actors aren't getting paid. The writers don't get paid, the
directors don't get paid. Every time it gets rewatched. That's
one of the main reasons why we are on strike.
We gotta do what we gotta do to get the
fucking union back. Unfortunately, it's just not happening. It's not
happening yet. But we just have to stand in the pocket,
(06:30):
be patient. But I know a lot of people are
fucked up. A lot of people are fucked up because
of this strike. It's not good. It's not good, and
it's just gonna get worse. And I know it's scary.
It sucks to not know when you're not gonna work again.
And like I said before, do not think that everybody
is Timothy Shamalama Ding Dong. Do not think that everybody
(06:51):
is George Clooney or Jennifer Lawrence. Respectfully, that is not
the case for ninety nine point nine per of actors.
And it's not just about the actors, it's about the
the writers. Not everybody is it's a guy's name who
wrote Larry David. Not everybody is what's my guy's name
(07:15):
who wrote this? Whatever, it ain't what you think it is,
trust me anyway, fantastic. I am rap por stereo podcast
coming live and direct. Like I said, it's hot all
over the country hot, swamp ass hot, but that's part
(07:36):
for the course. It's still September. Just you know, you
don't want to sweat it out. You don't want leaky ass. Sorry.
I know it's disgusting, but that's what happens during swamp
ass season. I will say that it was great to
(07:56):
be in Salt Lake City and watch the premiere episode
of the Real Housewives of Salt Lake City. I gotta
tell you, and I'm not gonna don't get don't freak out,
gonna be quick with this. I'm gonna be quick with this.
But what a cast of kooky characters of course.
Speaker 2 (08:18):
Uh.
Speaker 1 (08:18):
The star of the Real Housewives of Salt Lake City
is currently in prison. She's in the same prison as
the woman the Theoran Nose woman, the woman who went
to jail for scamming the shit out of scamming man.
Scammer's gonna scam. Scammers are gonna scam. And you may
(08:43):
think shit is sweet. You may be buying yourself motorcycles
and burking bags and who the funk knows shoes, colognes, trips, houses,
but they're gonna catch you. Scamming is just like drug dealing.
(09:03):
You're either gonna wind up in jail. Well, you're probably
not gonna wind up bad from scamming, but you're gonna
wind up in jail. Most likely they're gonna get your ass.
Might it might not be quick, You might have a
nice thing going, but sooner or later they are going
to catch the government. Don't fuck around defense, you don't
(09:27):
want that fed time. They got the great Genshaw from
the Real Housewives of Salt Lake City. I say that
only on her performance in real life. Scammer, it's a
fucking scammer. They got that thorough nosed chick in that
same prison. But that Genshaw, my god, she was great
(09:50):
on the Real Housewives of Salt Lake City and the
Real Housewives of Salt Lake City. They got one of
the wackiest motherfuckers I've ever seen on television. Back my girl,
Mary Cosby. She's a funk. She is great. Out of
her fucking mind. They brought her back for season four
of the Real Housewives of Salt Lake City. And you
(10:11):
don't know what's gonna come out of her mouth. You
don't know if she's being genuine, you don't know if
she's being sarcastic. You don't know what the fuck the
great Mary Cosby is talking about. It's coming from left field,
right field, center field, it's coming from the bleachers, it's
coming from and off the top rope. She's fantastic. That's
(10:34):
all I'm gonna say. That's all i'm gonna say. But
I'm gonna tell you that the Real Housewives of Salt
Lake City and me being in Utah doing shows this
weekend at wise, guys watching it, I fell closer to
the action. I felt like I could feel them. I
could feel them in the air. I can feel it
coming in the air tonight. To quote the great Phil Collins.
Speaker 3 (10:58):
NFL's here.
Speaker 1 (11:16):
Oh my god, it was so good. It was so
good to see the Detroit Lions and the Kansas City Chiefs.
It was so good to see. Yo. I don't know
if you guys watched the game on what was it Amazon?
Speaker 2 (11:37):
Yo?
Speaker 1 (11:38):
They're on some techmobile shit, They're on some video game ship.
Now when you watch the game, I think it's a
little much overkill. But they got uh was it Amazon?
Was it YouTube? I don't know. With Thursday Night Football,
they got all kinds of shit going out out there,
Prime vision, you know, with the lines and the computers
(12:02):
and the predictions and who's gonna who's gonna blitz and
who's gonna kick, and who's gonna run and who's gonna fall.
You know, in twenty years, you're literally gonna be able
to see from the vantage point of the next Patrick
Mahomeboy or the next Tom Brady or whoever, because the
(12:24):
way shit is looking now with this AI technology for
the games is insane, is insane. But we're back. We're back,
and there's gonna be a lot of confusion because, uh,
the games are only on YouTube TV. I cut the
fucking chord. I'm glad I cut the fucking chord now,
(12:46):
truth be told, it's still a little confusing as to
how it's gonna go down and the red Zone and
the channels, and it's gonna be a little learning curve.
And I know Sunday there's a lot of people that
didn't cut the cord. There's a lot of people that
didn't sign up for YouTube TV are gonna be trying
to watch Red Zone or Fantasy Zone or this game
or that game or NFL ticket whatever. It's so it's
(13:09):
a little it's a little much. There's so many apps,
but it's going down. It is going down. I am
wishing everybody that listens to the I Am rap Port
Stereo podcast the most luck in your fantasy football season.
Beat the shit out of whoever you're playing, talk shit relentlessly,
and if you happen to lose, if you happen to lose,
(13:34):
and if you go to captain picks dot com, I
don't think you should lose most of the time. Listen,
nobody's gonna go undefeated in fantasy football. Nobody's gonna go
undefeated when you're taking and making that action betting on
NFL College cross soccer, MMA, UFC whenever. But if you
(14:01):
want to put yourself in the best position to win
the majority of the time, go to captain picks dot com.
Captain picks dot com, think me later, you funk you.
One thing you can also think me later is now.
You guys know I've talked about my obsession with my Jordan's.
(14:26):
I'm stopped. I've stopped. There's no more. I'm not buying anymore.
I got enough. I'm done. I'm gonna be fifty four
in March. Although I am a cool, dope new millennial
fifty four, meaning that motherfucker like me I make fifty
four cool, like, I'm not gonna be dressed up. I've
(14:49):
always been fascinated by that. Like, when my generation and
the generation behinds me gets older, we're not gonna be
wearing our little old man suits. No disrespect, but you
can't be dressing up looking like, you know, Gumby. Also,
you know they got those those Gumby shoes. Everybody's wearing
(15:09):
those red Mickey mouse joints. I don't know what the
fuck those are, but I think inevitably when I'm like
seventy five, which fuck, man, that's that's almost that's twenty
one years away. God damn it, Holy fucking shit. My
(15:30):
son's twenty one, my other son's twenty three. Twenty one
years is not. Oh my god, damn it. Hole, Yo,
you got Holy fuck. I gotta make the most of
the next twenty seventy five years old. What the fuck
is that? Let me stay focused? Holy shit, Holy fucking shit.
(15:53):
Let me stay focused. When I'm seventy five years old,
I'm probably gonna go back to wearing New Balance all
the time. I still wear my New Balance a lot
of the time. I'm although I you know, I still
rock my I rock my Jordan's that's not the point.
The point is that my friend Toby, he's gotten into running,
so he's got all kinds of different running sneakers, okay,
(16:13):
And he suggested that I get a pair of these
on O N running sneakers. He said, they're super comfortable.
They're light. Ba ba ba ba bah. So I got
a pair of these on running sneakers o N the
Cloud shoes, Okay, and they're light. It's different, you know, Bapa.
(16:37):
I see a lot of fucking people wearing them, like
maybe maybe they're maybe they're enjoying their comfort more than me.
Fuck my on running sneakers. First of all, they're too expensive.
Number two, they've worn out quickly. Number three, number three okay,
my cloud on running sneakers. They sqush, they squeak. I
(17:00):
hear them when I'm walking. I hear them when I
am walking down the street. Okay. And it's not my knees.
I posted a video. Someone was like, Yo, it's probably
your knees, your old fuck you knock on wood. Fortunately,
my knees are good knock on wood. Because once those
fucking knees go, I got enough problems. I got enough
(17:25):
fucking problems. I don't need my knees giving out. I
really don't. So it wasn't my knees, this fucking sneaker,
and it wasn't the rain, it wasn't the dampness. I've
had them for a couple of months now, two months.
They fucking squish man s. I don't like it. I
(17:47):
got enough things that I'm annoyed about. I got enough
things that I don't like to hear, especially walking when
you're in New York City. There's sirens, there's there's fucking explosions,
there's jackhammers. And let me tell you something, shout out
to all my construction workers in New York City. When
I see my construction workers and they go mic rap
I went over to a dude the other day. Was
(18:08):
hot as funk. He said, Mike Ramp fuck Trump, I said, yo.
I walked across the street to him. My maya put
down the jackcamer. I gave him a pen, and I
was like, how you doing. But because I'm like, yo,
this that's a man. My dude had a jackcamer in
his hand. He he was sweating like a fucking pink
with a smile on his face, busting his ASTs. I said,
(18:32):
you're a You're a fucking man. Shout out to everybody
who's working hard. Okay, Shout out to everybody that's grinding
and out doing what they gotta do to take care
of themselves, take care of their families. I know I'm blessed,
and I know my job. My work is easy compared
(18:53):
to what motherfuckers have to do to make a living. Okay.
Shout out to all you guys worldwide. Girls. When I
say guys, I mean everybody collectively. I don't don't start
no shit with me, start no shit with me anyway.
The point is is that you know all these these
high falutin New Age sneakers, and they got the ons
(19:15):
and this one's and the super clouds and the super
duper clouds and the clouds and the rainbows, Old faithful
works New Balance is the most comfortable walking, slash running,
slash casual shoe period period. And now they finally, for
(19:36):
some reason, they got some better styles and some colors
and all that, but them on shoes. Any of you
guys fall into the trap of going away from old
New Balance is the shoe, but any is anybody else
got these on shoes to your on shoes? Ye cloud
(19:57):
joint sqush because mind fucking sqush whish squish when I'm
walking and I don't like it. That's my review and
I'm sticking to it. This is happening. I don't know why.
I don't know why. Sometimes I go on X, which
is it's just a cesspool of shit Twitter X. It's
(20:22):
a cess pool of dog shit. It's just mountains and
mountains of dog shit. And the and the hero, the
hero of the the right wing cookie freaks. Well, one
of the heroes is, of course Alex Jones, who the
right wing cookie freaks. They just they'll go. Alex Jones
(20:43):
was right, but he wasn't right. He wasn't right about
Sandy Hook, was he. That's the one that he he
wasn't right about. Huh. That's the old thorn in the
side for Alex Jones. Huh, Sandy Hook. That's the one
that fucked you, Alex Jones. But these people they just
(21:04):
love him, they love Don't you have any other people
to idolize besides the proud boys who just got sentenced.
Enrique Torrio, the proud boy. How's that gonna work out
for you? Proud boy Enrique? Now that you're in jail
because you ain't white. You ain't white. Now, I don't
(21:27):
know how that's gonna work out with you in prison.
The majority besides yourself of the Proud Boys are white,
and you are just I mean the Proud Boys and
the other Proud Boy who got arrested for January six,
eighteen years good lock them all the fuck up. But
(21:48):
I mean, these guys, you go to Twitter, you might
as well. They might as well build statues for the
Proud Boys that are in jail, For Alex Jones, for
Tucker Carlson. Tucker Carlson who had a guy on his
new Twitter show that looks like he literally he literally
(22:12):
crawled out of a fucking like he just got out
of a method one clinic. Looked like he's missing teeth.
Tucker Carlson, mister mister a fucking news guy. Mister guy
who says he doesn't he doesn't like politics. He doesn't,
he doesn't follow politics, he doesn't like talking about politics.
But all he does is have people on his show
(22:36):
to discuss politics. He had a guy on there and
goddamn that fucking shit box Twitter went crazy. Guy on there,
that's a legend that he had sex, gay sex with
President Barack Obama. B Rock. Now, let me tell you something.
(22:58):
This toothless freak, I think his name's Barry who's saying
he had sex with b Rock. I don't care if
Barack Obama's smoking crack, which is what the guy is saying.
I don't care if Barack Obama is game. If you
think Barack Obama on his worst day would funk this
(23:19):
toothless white trash piece of shit that's saying he had
sex with Barack Obama. Let me tell you something, Homy,
Tucker Carlson and all this shit, If Barack Obama was
trying to freak off, the last person he would be
trying to freak off with was the guy you had
(23:40):
on your show, Tucker Carlson. Did you guys watch it?
I didn't watch it. I couldn't. This guy looks like
he's been displaced. He's been arrested for various crime, scamming, scheming,
and then somehow, some way, Tucker Carlson, who says he
doesn't like talking about politics, has a guy on his
(24:04):
show that is a legend. He had sex with b
Rock what in nineteen ninety nine and they were doing
crack that Lawrence Taylor, that's Samuel Jackson, that Hunter Biden
and Twitter, and they should build a fucking statue for
Alex Jones, for Tucker Carlson and the Proud Boys. They
(24:25):
love these fucking guys adoration, They suck them off. They
love these fucking guys. Alex Jones was right about everything, right,
so you say, except for standy hook. That's the one
thing he wasn't right about. You fucking losers, you freaks,
(24:46):
You sick focks. Which brings me to one of the
sickest sick funk incidents I've ever heard of. I have
gotten multi requests to talk about a sick funk on
a flight, and I always say that the majority of
(25:06):
flights where incidents happen are the short flights. Okay, uh,
that is where it goes down Atlanta to Philly, Philly
to Dallas. It could be uh, you know, Chicago to Phoenix. However,
(25:30):
there was a flight that was forced to land going
from Atlanta to Barcelona. I imagine you. I've never been
to Barcelona, but but I've been on vacation, been to Italy,
been to Thailand, in Hawaii, South America, right, Argentina, but
(25:55):
new A couple of I'm not. I'm not the big
world traveler that you would expect the man who hosts
the world's most disruptive podcast, The World's most disruptive podcast.
You would think, Oh, oh, Mike, crap, you've been everywhere.
I haven't. I gotta fix that before I'm seventy five, Babe.
I just realized that in twenty one years, almost twenty
(26:19):
one years, I'm gonna be seventy five years old. That
ain't fucking cool. My son twenty one years old and
then twenty one years went quick. Gotta fucking enjoy it
while you can. Nonetheless, if you're heading to Barcelona in
(26:42):
the summer, you're either going to vacation coming back from vacation.
Barcelona sounds like a beautiful place Spain. You're going from
Atlanta to Barcelona on your trip that you probably saved
a lot of money to go on and lo and
behold some sick fuck And I know, I'm sure this
(27:04):
wasn't on purpose, and know it wasn't me. Some people
are like, Yo, my crap, was this you? No? I
shit outside, Duke. I don't shit on planes. I'll say
that again. I shit outside, I don't shit on I'll
shit in the bathroom on a plane. That's not the point.
Some people are like, Yo, Duke, were you on the
plane from Atlanta to Barcelona? A plane had to land
(27:30):
from Atlanta to Barcelona because some animal shat on the plane.
And I don't mean in the bathroom this. I don't
know what happened. I have compassion for these people. I
have ulter of colitis. I am currently in remission. Thank God.
Shout out to all my people that know somebody that
(27:52):
has a l sort of colius Crohn's disease. You know
what it is. I'll leave it at that. But my
people that have that, we know how to find and
get to a bathroom. Somebody couldn't find and get themselves
(28:12):
to a bathroom on this flight from a Landa to
Barcelona and shat all up and down the aisles. I know,
I know you're probably puking in your mouth. I know
you probably saying, Mike Crap, Yo chill, I'm eating Yo,
mic Wrap, I'm at work, watch listening to you. Mike Wrap.
I'm driving, Mike Wrap, I'm pulled over in my car.
(28:33):
Mike Rap, I'm trying to sleep. Mike crap. Why are
you saying this? I don't make this shit up, no
pun intended. I just reported, I don't make this shit up.
I just reported, homie shut up and down the aisles
of the plane. Can you imagine the fear, the panic,
(28:57):
the fright, Well, you're being a man or a woman.
They haven't, they haven't out of this person who shat
up and down the aisles of a plane. But they
had to land the plane. Of course. Information is still
pouring in again, diarrhea pouring no pun intended, huh, but
(29:18):
there were They had to land it because what they
call it biohazard. Yo, you shipped the plane. That's biohazard, dude,
you ship because they got carpet, they got those those
leather seats, they got plastic. I'm surprised it didn't go
from this man or woman again hasn't been identified. I'm
(29:41):
surprised other people didn't start throwing up in the aisles
because it's a what do you call it effect? It's
a what kind of effect, ship, whatever effect, whatever effect
it is. I'm just glad that people made it off
(30:03):
the plane and whatever kind of effect from somebody diarrhe
ing and then one person throwing up and the other
person throwing up everybody made it off this infected bio.
I mean, what do you do with a plane like that?
Do you remodel it? Like, what do you have to do?
And can you imagine the fear and the chaos. And
there's probably kids on the plane, and there's probably Spanish
(30:25):
speaking people on the plane and Americans on the and
everybody's just going, I mean, it's just a true shit fling. Finally,
(30:52):
there was again on Twitter. I gotta get off that
fucking Twitter. It's garbage. There was anti Semitism was was
trending the other day for the whole day. I think
it started because somebody at the US Open, while one
of the players was playing, who was German, shouted out,
(31:15):
I believe hail Hitler. He screamed that to the German player,
and the German player told the referee somebody just screamed
out the most popular phrase that Adolf Hitler ever used.
He didn't repeat it, and the referee said, find that person.
(31:37):
Then they threw the person out. They should have beat
him up, and anti Semitism was trending for the next
twenty four hours. It's always trending, but it's always being discussed.
What's anti Semitic, what's not anti Semitic, or what's anti
Jewish and what's not anti Jewish. It's always being discussed
by non Jews. We'll let you know what we don't like.
(32:02):
We'll let you know what we find offensive. We'll speak
on behalf of ourselves. We don't need a bunch of
goys respectfully goam respectfully explaining what we should and shouldn't
be offended about. You never do that with the black people,
(32:27):
the African Americans, yet you want to keep the Jewish
people's names out your mouth. If we get offended, we
get offended, all right, And if you get offended by
us getting offended, that's your problem, you funk. You you
understand if we get offended, we get offended. We'll let
(32:47):
you know what we deem as offensive. We don't need
you cracker ass crackers diagnosing and judging and scoring and
debating on what we think is offensive. I said it once,
I've said it many many times. Keep the Jewish people's
(33:11):
names out your fucking mouth. God damn it, it's almost
rushing Shana for crying out loud. It's the high Holidays,
you fucks. We ain't doing this this year on you
know what we were doing last year on the high holidays,
dealing with fucking Kookie Kane. Wis we not doing it
again this year? We not doing it again this year?
(33:34):
You focks you. Domino effect is what it is. Domino effect.
That's what I meant. On the plane, one person throws up,
the next person throws up, calling a domino effect. Anyway,
I'm done, Okay. I hope everybody has a great, great
rest of the weekend. I hope everybody really stays cool.
(33:58):
I hope everybody stays safe, stay safe, and definitely however
you do it, because there ain't just one way to
be disruptive. My wigh's my way. I hope everybody stays disruptive.
Miles to ordn Ak, the Bleach Brothers aka the Dust
Brothers respectfully, take me out of here with something real nicess,
(34:19):
take me out of here with something real loud, yes,
but most importantly, end this puppy with something real funky.
It's the im Rappaport stereo punk is I'm out
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