Just Jennie: Chasing that “25th Hour”

In this solo episode, Jennie breaks down the myth of the “25th hour.” She gets real about the nonstop pressure so many of us feel… the commitments, the caretaking, the fear, the juggling, the emotional weight we don’t even notice we’re carrying and the choices we can make to create peace.

Follow the "I Choose Me" Podcast on Instagram and TikTok

Follow Jennie on Instagram, TikTok, and Facebook

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:01):
You're listening to I Choose Me with Jenny Girl. Hello,
welcome back to I Choose Me. As you know, this
podcast is all about choices, but today it's a just
Jenny episode, and I'm going to be talking about something

(00:22):
that I know is going to hit home for almost
every person listening, maybe just in different ways. It's that
thing we are all chasing time. Okay, So here's a question.
What is up with this constant feeling of just being

(00:43):
slammed all the time, like go go go every day.
I mean, truly, it's constantly just grinding, just carrying so
much on your shoulders. I don't know about you, but
I can feel it sometimes, like I can feel the
weight of all the commitments and all of the things

(01:07):
that I need to do and be. It's heavy. It's
a lot, and I know if I'm feeling it, you're
feeling it too, in whatever your scenario is. And it
doesn't even matter what the weight actually is, because my
weight is different than your weight. Maybe your weight is.
You're feeling anxious about the possibility of losing your job.

(01:31):
I mean, hello, we all need our jobs, but there's
an underlying fear that I have of not being able
to take care of myself or my family. And that's
that's a deep fear. It's always there. Life is Krayz

(01:51):
right now. Who knows. Maybe you're a new parent and
you're juggling an entire new life, a new list of responsibilities.
You got bottles, you got the diapers, you're sleep deprived.
It's a lot. There's no handbook for Actually, there is
a handbook for it. I read it. You probably read it.

(02:13):
What to expect and respecting. But you know what I'm
saying is, even in different situations, if you're a parent,
there's the forever epic responsibility of being a good mom
or dad through every stage and every age. Or maybe
you're a parent to an adult kid who still needs

(02:34):
a lot of let's just call it guidance, and we're
trying to figure out how to do this. You know,
we're trying to stay connected with our adult kids as
they're leaving the nest, but also knowing, you know, we
got to let them fly. So yeah, figuring out that
whole new rhythm, that whole vibe take some work. Perhaps

(02:58):
you're all the sudden face having to be a completely
different kind of parent, like me to an eighty three
year old infant child who used to be my parent.
Kind of thing which requires a great amount of love, yes,
but also patience, so much patience, like all the patients sometimes,

(03:18):
but you know in your bones that's what you need
to be doing. Oh and then there's the relationships. They
are work. A commitment to grow alongside with your person,
whether you are together or apart, is a lot of work.
You have to give that time or it will just
fizzle and you will grow apart, and we don't want

(03:41):
that to happen. Or maybe it's just all the hoops,
all the hoops that you've been jumping through trying to
hustle your schedule so that you can do all the things.
And then least we forget the you of it, all
the upkeep of you. You guys, it is real. Your
physical health, your mental health, your skin and hair health,

(04:05):
your eyes, your teeth, your gut, your pelvic floor. It's
like it's never ending. This list is never ending of
things we need to do to take care of ourselves.
I mean, I'll let you in on a little insight.
I am working harder now than I've ever worked in
my life. When I look at my calendar, I almost
have a panic attack because literally every hour is accounted

(04:27):
for in my workday, from getting up, exercising, eating breakfast,
it's all on the calendar. Sit down and work on
your book, go to the meeting, get on that zoom
call design Fall twenty twenty six. Like, there is so
much to do in every single day. Sometimes I think

(04:47):
there's no way I'm going to get it all done.
And sometimes I think, oh my gosh, I don't want
to be so scheduled. My entire life is like on
the calendar. It's there's something so helpful about scheduling your time,
but then there's also something like, ooh, that's a lot,
and this living of a life, it's a big deal.
If you're like me, you're saying yes to everything. You

(05:09):
want to fix every problem, you want to help every person.
You want to do all the things. But sometimes maybe
this will happen to you. I was on the phone
with one of my friends the other day. I was
wanting to be there for her. Well, of course, listen,
I want to help her, and I realized I was
trying to solve a problem that wasn't mine to solve it.
And you, guys, I have a lot of problems to solve,

(05:31):
and I felt like it was adding like ten pounds
of emotional weight to my back. We do that without
even thinking. We take on other people's problems. But if
we have any self awareness, hopefully we slow down for
half a second and we realize, oh, okay, I am

(05:52):
actually running on fumes here. My tank was getting way
too close to e and we go to that dialogue,
Oh okay, it's okay. I just have time today to
take care of myself. If I only had a little
more time, if I only had another hour in the day,
then I would finally find the time to take care
of me. That thought, if I only had more time

(06:14):
is the mythical twenty fifth hour. We chase it, but
we never find it. The truth is that hour is
a total illusion. So the mythical twenty fifth hour, it's
the hour we tell ourselves we'll finally rest, I'll finally

(06:36):
work out. I'll just finally get to sit in silence
and think about what I'm grateful for. But here's the truth.
If we magically had a twenty fifth hour in the day,
most of us wouldn't use it to rest. We'd fill
it right back up. Another errand another quick phone call
for work another thing for the kids. It's like dig

(06:58):
in a hole in the sand and you know you're
making the space. You're digging in there, you're trying to
carve out somewhere safe. But before you know it, a wave,
Yes I'm getting metaphorical here, another task floods the space
and then before you know another big wave comes along,
more obligations, more to dos. The sand just collapses. It

(07:20):
flattens out, like your space never existed. It's gone. Sometimes
you just have to reorganize things. You have to reprioritize.
Even though you've got it all laid out and you think,
here's the plan, this is going to work. Something will
come up and you will need to add that in
make that happen, find that time. And for me, it

(07:42):
is usually about looking at what I have, deciding what
can slide to the next day, what can go to
next week, what needs my attention right now? And that's
how I sort of prioritize my to dos on my calendar.
I'm sorry to say this, but I'm sausage just talking
about all this. You guys. The problem, though I want

(08:03):
you to know, is not the clock. The problem is
that we don't want to spend time or make the
effort to take care of ourselves, to keep digging the
holes and finding that safe space. The problem is we
stop loving ourselves enough to prioritize our well being over
all the other noises. We've trained ourselves and crucially, we

(08:28):
train the people around us that we are endlessly available.
I've had to learn that the hard way that when
I drop everything to rescue someone, I'm actually teaching them
that my time is less valuable than their emergency. I mean,
you know, unless it's an actual physical emergency. Choosing me
isn't selfish, Guys, is an act of necessary self love,

(08:52):
and teaching others how to respect my boundaries is a priority. Okay, So,
since I've gone a little long here and maybe even
gotten a little too worked up, I want to leave
you with a promise this isn't just a venting session.
We are going to fix this. I am going to
drop my tips to choosing my time on a bonus

(09:13):
episode in a couple of days. We're talking concrete steps
how to schedule your workout without guilt, how to say
no to a new commitment when you're already overbooked, and
how to communicate this change to your family and friends,
So make sure you're subscribed. Hit that follow button right
now so you know when that's ready, and we will

(09:34):
continue this conversation and you will get the four to
one one on how I successfully carve out time for
myself and start choosing me first. You deserve this, friends,
you really do. So until the bonus episode, let's do this.
Let's try claiming fifteen minutes today. Don't fill it with

(09:55):
a task, just claim it as your own. Sit with it.
That is your first step toward claiming the twenty fifth
hour that was already waiting for you. Thank you for
choosing me. Bye for now,