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June 5, 2023 38 mins

What would a meaningful life look like for you?

According to Death Doula Alua Arthur, conversations about death can be the most enriching conversations we have. It’s not about accepting death, or avoiding grief - it’s about building a relationship with yourself and others that doesn’t hold anything back. Why should you listen? Yeah, because you’re mortal and one day you'll die, but more importantly: because one day, hopefully in the far off future, you’ll look back at this life you’ve lived. Conversations about death can make that life so much better. 


7 things you’ll learn in this episode: 


  • What’s a Death Doula? 
  • Does being honest about death give you access to joy?
  • Should you tell someone that they’re dying, or does that remove hope? 
  • Why living each day like it’s your last is unrealistic (and what to do instead) 
  • Should you reach for a “meaningful life”?
  • Why hope sets you up for disappointment - and why hope is dangerous at end of life
  • The linking of death and grief: Death and grief are married, but grief definitely dates around. 

Related episodes: 

Trauma Surgeon Dr. Red Hoffman on the surprisingly broad umbrella of palliative care


The co-founders of the New York Zen Center for Contemplative Care on supporting burnout & stress among healthcare professionals & caregivers


Notable quotes: 

“I'm the only one who's going to have to contend with all the choices I made at my deathbed. Nobody else.” - Alua Arthur


About our guest:

Alua Arthur is a Death Doula, recovering attorney, and the founder of Going with Grace, a Death Doula training and end-of-life planning organization that exists to support people as they answer the question, “What must I do to be at peace with myself so that I may live presently and die gracefully?” She’s been featured in the LA Times, Vogue, Refinery29, The Doctors, and alongside Chris Hemsworth on the docuseries, Limitless. 


Find her at and on Instagram @going_with_grace 


About Megan: 

Psychotherapist and bestselling author Megan Devine is recognized as one of today’s most insightful and original voices on grief, from life-altering losses to the everyday grief that we don’t call grief. She helms a consulting practice in Los Angeles and serves as an organizational consultant for the healthcare and human resources industries. 

The best-selling book on grief in over a decade, Megan’s It’s Ok that You’re Not OK, is a global phenomenon that has been translated into more than 25 languages. Her celebrated animations and explainers have garnered over 75 million views and are used in training programs around the world.


Additional resources:

The Going with Grace website

Megan mentions this book -  Pronoia Is the Antidote for Paranoia


Want to talk with Megan directly? Two options: apply for a 1:1 consultation through the contact form, OR Join our patreon community for live monthly Q&A sessions: either way… it’s your questions, answered.


Check out Megan’s best-selling books - It’s OK That You're Not OK and How to Carry What Can’t Be Fixed 


Books and resources may contain affiliate links.

Get in touch:

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