All Episodes

June 19, 2023 59 mins

“Wonder is the root of love, the lack of wonder is the root of violence.” 

Is there a way to create boundaries with someone who wishes to cause harm? Can you love them and hold them accountable? Do you have to fight for a just world for everyone?

Valarie Kaur is no stranger to violence. As a Sikh, as a woman, as a person of color, violence has shaped both her activism and her deep sense of community care. Her Revolutionary Love Project is the blueprint for organizers, activists, and really - anyone in love with the world and what it could be. 


This week, the activist, and best-selling author of See No Stranger joins me to talk about love, action, and the power of wonder in the face of impossible things. 


We cover activism, wonder, horror, grief, acts of violence, acts of justice, parenting in an age of rampant school violence, healing family wounds, building true community - and why fighting for love and pleasure is always going to be more sustainable than fighting against hate. 

“I spent the last 20 years organizing my life around hate and I want to spend the next 20 years organizing around love. The pain of the world is the pain of the world, regardless.” - Valarie Kaur


* One brief content note, Valarie’s neighborhood had some construction going on, so there’s more background noise in this episode than usual. Listen for the goodness, though - it’s all around you. 


In this episode we cover:

  • How do you continue to work on behalf of EVERYONE for a more just and beautiful world, when some of those people cause great harm? 
  • Getting outside of unbearable pain so you can survive
  • Do you have to suffer in order to be of service? Being an activist for the long haul
  • “Squad care” and what it means for activists and anyone alive in the world
  • What do you want future generations to inherit from your time here? 


Want grief support with Megan? Apply for 1:1 sessions here, or join the monthly Q&A here

Related episodes:

The Love-Filled World

A Place Called Home: a conversation with child welfare advocate, David Ambroz

Connection is the best medicine: with Dr. Rana Awdish

Notable quotes: 

“We're living in a time where we have to metabolize grief on a scale that no other generation before us has had to.” - Valarie Kaur


“Our solidarity is only as deep as our ability to love one another, and our ability to love one another is only as deep as our ability to weep with one another.” -  Valarie Kaur

About our guest: 

Valarie Kaur is a renowned civil rights leader, lawyer, award-winning filmmaker, educator, author of the #1 LA Times Bestseller SEE NO STRANGER, and founder of the Revolutionary Love Project. A daughter of Punjabi Sikh farmers in California, her work has ignited a national movement to reclaim love as a force for justice. See No Stranger: A Memoir and Manifesto of Revolutionary Love

About Megan: 

Psychotherapist and bestselling author Megan Devine is recognized as one of today’s most insightful and original voices on grief, from life-altering losses to the everyday grief that we don’t call grief. She helms a consulting practice in Los Angeles and serves as an organizational consultant for the healthcare and human resources industries. 

The best-selling book on grief in over a decade, Megan’s It’s Ok that You’re Not OK, is a global phenomenon that has been translated into more than 25 languages. Her celebrated animations and explainers have garnered over 75 million views and are used in training programs around the world.


Additional resources:

Mark as Played

Advertise With Us

Popular Podcasts

McCartney: A Life in Lyrics

McCartney: A Life in Lyrics

"McCartney: A Life in Lyrics" offers listeners the opportunity to sit in on conversations between Paul McCartney and poet Paul Muldoon dissecting the people, experiences, and art that inspired McCartney’s songwriting. These conversations were held during the past several years as the two collaborated on the best selling book, “The Lyrics: 1965 to Present.” Over two seasons and 24 episodes of “McCartney: A Life in Lyrics”, you’ll hear a combination master class, memoir, and improvised journey with one of the most beloved figures in popular music. Each episode focuses on one song from McCartney’s iconic catalog – spanning early Beatles through his solo work. Season 1 premieres on October 4th. “McCartney: A Life in Lyrics” is a co-production between iHeart Media, MPL and Pushkin Industries. Cover Portrait © 1967 Paul McCartney / Photographer: Linda McCartney

Dateline NBC

Dateline NBC

Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations.

Crime Junkie

Crime Junkie

If you can never get enough true crime... Congratulations, you’ve found your people.

For You

    Music, radio and podcasts, all free. Listen online or download the iHeart App.


    © 2023 iHeartMedia, Inc.