May 30, 2024 • 29 mins
Jennie and Luca discuss their “valuable relationship.” They share how they make the distance between them work, what helped Luca in growing up (especially with a famous mom) and what happened when Luca disapproved of her mom getting remarried!
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:12):
Hey everybody. I'm Jenny Garth and I am joined today
on the Mommy and Me podcast by my me. This
is my little me.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
Hi, I'm the me. I'm Luca Bella. I'm Jenny's oldest daughter.
Speaker 1 (00:25):
You're my first little baby me. Yes, it's your first,
my first born. We are taking over Bethany's podcast today.
This is pretty fun.
Speaker 2 (00:36):
It's just like hanging out. Though I purposely didn't call
you earlier because I was like, we gotta have some
juice for the for the pod. I call you like
choice to day three times a day before before noon.
Speaker 1 (00:47):
For those of the of you that don't know, Luca
is living in New York City now and I'm living
in California, So we're a by coastal mommy and me.
Speaker 2 (00:59):
Longest and relationship. We make it work.
Speaker 1 (01:04):
We make it work.
Speaker 2 (01:05):
We we're honestly together a lot.
Speaker 1 (01:07):
Yeah. We zoom while I'm driving, which is probably not
a good idea. We zoom while we're making dinner at
our different houses. Anytime you go on the subway, I
feel like you zoom me because then I have a
panic attack.
Speaker 2 (01:23):
Also, it's like very loud and you're like, why are
you going me? At the loudest moment.
Speaker 1 (01:27):
That's the worst. But every time you go to the
subway and you're I can hear you like click click click,
like walking downstairs. I can hear like the thing, like
the money when you put the card, and the like
turnstile thing. And then I can hear you standing there waiting,
and my mind is just racing with all the bad
things that could happen to you down there. And then
(01:47):
this is the best part. We'll be talking mid sentence,
I'll just lose you.
Speaker 2 (01:52):
Yeah, I'll cut out. Yeah, sorry, let the subway.
Speaker 1 (01:56):
Yeah yeah, But you know what happens to my mommy
brain at that point, I'm like full blown panic. What
someone's pushed her onto the tracks, There's been a gunfight,
I don't know. I think of the worst possible scenarios
when that happens.
Speaker 2 (02:11):
Usually I'm just hanging up on you. I'm sorry. I
do abruptly out a lot.
Speaker 1 (02:16):
Oh, well, you are a big girl. I guess I
should let you take the subway.
Speaker 2 (02:23):
I you know, I am out here hustling. I'm out
here grinding, so every day you never.
Speaker 1 (02:29):
Know, You're not kidding. Living in New York City is
a ussle. It's a grind.
Speaker 2 (02:34):
Yeah. They say that New York is hard on the body,
but Ela is hard on the soul. They say, I've
heard that. I think it's funny because La is a
little dryer. I feel like New York you just get
like so much culture and so much you know, energy.
So I feel like it's a really good place for
me at this chapter in my life, but definitely definitely
(02:55):
a harder place to live.
Speaker 1 (02:58):
Yeah. Every time I come to visit you in New
York's city, we walk at least fourteen thousand steps in
a day.
Speaker 2 (03:06):
Well, I feel like I'm hard on you, and we
come because I really love to walk, so you do,
Oh it's only two blocks away, and then I'll there
minutes later. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (03:14):
The thing we all know about you is you lie
about how far our destination is. Because you'll say it's
two blocks, and in two blocks, I'll be like, are
we here yet? You say no, no, no, it's just
two more blocks. And that happens over and over and over,
and Yeah. I don't know why you do that. I
guess you don't want me to know how far it is,
(03:35):
because you know, I'll be like, let's get in a taxi.
Speaker 2 (03:37):
I feel like it feels like two blocks to me,
but to other people.
Speaker 1 (03:43):
Well, your legs are really long, right, and you are
so used to that life, like I'm used to getting
in my car to go wherever I want.
Speaker 2 (03:52):
I feel like you have a pretty good setup when
you ride around. You have your music, you have your dogs,
like I wish I'm fighting to the New York cold.
Speaker 1 (04:02):
Yeah. I have a lot of respect for you, Luca.
I mean I have a lot of respect for you
just because you're amazing, but also because you make living
in New York City look easy, and I know it's
not easy.
Speaker 2 (04:22):
To My mom is telling me I should start like
a TikTok on how to live in New York for
five dollars a day, because.
Speaker 1 (04:27):
I definitely yeah, tell them.
Speaker 2 (04:30):
I've been known to stretch a dollar in New York City.
Speaker 1 (04:33):
You are a magician when it comes to cash money, Like,
I don't know how you do it. You don't. This
girl can literally live in New York City on five
dollars a week if she wanted to.
Speaker 2 (04:46):
Yeah, because you killer problem.
Speaker 1 (04:50):
But where do you think that that ability came from?
Speaker 2 (04:56):
You're good a budget. You always taught me to be
smart with money, But I just also just like I
feel like I have like a less a zest for life,
Like I like to like do a lot. So it's
about like getting as much done as possible, and you know,
you got to stretch it when you can.
Speaker 1 (05:12):
Yeah, but you can get into any door with that
smile of yours and your personality. You can get into
any museum for free. Like, I don't know how you
do it. You're a master at all of that. I
have a lot of respect for you.
Speaker 2 (05:27):
I have a lot of respect for you. I feel
like that's one of my favorite things about our adult
mother daughter relationship is that it's founded on really great
mutual respect. And I don't really know when that started.
Do you remember, because I feel like we've always been
really close. But I feel like as I've gotten older
and you've gotten older, it's just really deepened in a
(05:48):
really beautiful way.
Speaker 1 (05:50):
Yeah. Well, first of all, I haven't gotten older.
Speaker 2 (05:55):
You are a rich one. No.
Speaker 1 (05:58):
I We've always had such a good relationship. You were
the baby, you were the first child that your dad
and I had, and we were so young, Oh my god,
So it was like we were growing up together. I
think that's probably one of the things that bonded us
the most, and when I had you, like nothing else mattered.
(06:21):
All that mattered was spending time with you. So we
spent so much time together.
Speaker 2 (06:26):
But I still feel like you're that way, like anytime
we have time off or any time you're not working,
like we're together or we're making plans to meet up
somewhere and have an adventure, Like I think that's something
you really made a value in your motherhood, is presence
and being there and always showing up. And yeah, I
just really am inspired by that.
Speaker 1 (06:49):
Oh thanks Lou. Yeah, it's really hard on me having
you live in New York, I'll be honest, but you
already know that I tried not to put it on you.
Speaker 2 (07:00):
I love how you text me every night or at
least every day once a day and like saco nay
or check in. Like, I still feel like you're very
present in my life.
Speaker 1 (07:10):
I don't know if I think that's called helicopter mom.
Speaker 2 (07:13):
No, I think you're the opposite. I don't think you
ever were like super involved in like my decisions. I
think you're very like hands off, And that's going back
to the mutual respect thing. It's like you just trust
me to make the best decisions for myself. And yeah,
I just I love your parenting style. I hope if
(07:34):
I'm ever a mommy that can be as good mommy
as you thought.
Speaker 1 (07:38):
I can't wait till you're a mommy.
Speaker 2 (07:41):
Told me many times. I'm alone.
Speaker 1 (07:45):
I like babies.
Speaker 2 (07:46):
No no, no, no, no, you're right, just wait, keep waiting.
Speaker 1 (07:50):
But going back to that thing about parenting, I I
was looking through my old journals the other day and
I saw this part about like I don't know, I
was talking about being a parent, and I was kind
of defined my rule as a parent. It's if I
imagine a ping No, no, what's that thing? Your dad
has one with Elvis on it? The machine, the.
Speaker 2 (08:11):
Player ping pong ball, pinball.
Speaker 1 (08:14):
Pinball, pinball, Yes, if you have a okay, So it's
like a pinball machine, right, and I'm standing I'm playing it,
and I'm standing there, and I have the two buttons
on the side and they control the flippers.
Speaker 2 (08:25):
Right.
Speaker 1 (08:26):
So I launched you out, No, no, no, I can
only flippers. I launched you out of the huote that
little thing you pull back and you're like ding. And
when you go into the world into the ping ball machine,
and you ding did ding ding ding, did ding ding
ding ding ding, And then when you come down to me,
I'm right there to push my little flippers to like
(08:48):
get you back up there. And I feel like that's all.
That's all I'm supposed to do as a mom, is
just keep you going on your life and be there
to help you and keep you from falling down on
the shoes.
Speaker 2 (09:04):
I don't want to fall down there.
Speaker 1 (09:06):
No, So that's that's my parenting analogy for the day.
You're welcome.
Speaker 2 (09:11):
No, it's really really true, and I think it's kind
of rare because I have a lot of friends and
you know, even family members where their parents are way
more involved, and I feel like you're just what you said,
like somebody to kind of like support but not be
two hands on.
Speaker 1 (09:26):
You know, I have so much respect for each of
you girls, you and your sisters, because I know what
(09:47):
is inside of you, and I know what each of
you are capable of, and I know what each of
your strong suits are and where you need a little
bit more, you know, guidance or support, and and I
really think that having that support and that respect, having
that respect for your your young teenagers or girls as
(10:10):
they get older in life I think that's vital to
a healthy mother daughter relationship because I'm not as much
your mommy now as I am your friend or your
sort of mentor kind of a vibe. And I really
take that seriously.
Speaker 2 (10:26):
Yeah, well, I'm the oldest, so I feel like you
kind of spread us each like there's five years kind
of between each of us, and so we're all at
different chapters in our lives and we all kind of
need different things. And I feel like you're really good
about individualizing our parenting, like not just you know, kind
of can go out making us one. So yeah, I
(10:48):
feel like, is that hard for you as a mom
to like hit our different needs at different times? You
have no idea? So I feel like I always kept
more in the childhood world for a long time because
we're very siblings. Like Sanna came until I was like
twenty one. You know it still come.
Speaker 1 (11:08):
But yeah, you've got five years. First of all, you
got five years completely on your own, best years ever know,
before your first sister Lola came along. No, but you
say always that's the best gift you ever got.
Speaker 2 (11:22):
Best gift I ever got. And it's funny because when
you told me about Lola, you were like, I'm giving
you this gift, like this is a huge responsibility as
a big sister, Like you'll have her as a best
friend forever. And I feel like that's how I shape
my whole view of being a sister, is that this
is like my best friend playmate that I get to have,
and you gave her to me. So I have so
(11:43):
much to be grateful to you for.
Speaker 1 (11:45):
You're welcome, and then I gave you another one.
Speaker 2 (11:47):
Yeah, thank you.
Speaker 1 (11:49):
You're so lucky to have. I have sisters, you know, like.
Speaker 2 (11:56):
That are older older than me. You're the youngest, I'm
the oldest. This is they're like.
Speaker 1 (12:01):
Half My sisters are all half sisters. Though they have
different dads, they'll have the same mom. But we're very
different then, you know, we have very different lifestyles, each
one of us. And I always really it was really
always so important to me when I had you guys,
to keep you together forever, whether you wanted it or not.
Speaker 2 (12:24):
But we mostly wanted it. Like I feel like to
this day, like we still want to hang out all
the time, like us girls, like the Garth Girls is
what we call ourselves, and like we are such a
unit and we've been through so much together, and I
think we really value just like being strong, independent women together.
Speaker 1 (12:43):
Yeah. I couldn't be prouder of you, baby.
Speaker 2 (12:45):
But that's an interesting thing because you have older sisters
and I have younger sisters. So how do you think
that makes us different the way we look at well,
our birth order. You know, there's a there's something to theory. Yeah,
birth order is like a big thing. Like you're the
oldest and that's a whole different cup of tea.
Speaker 1 (13:03):
I'm the baby of my family.
Speaker 2 (13:05):
Yep.
Speaker 1 (13:06):
Yeah, that's snotty brat sometimes.
Speaker 2 (13:10):
Well I think you and Fiona, who's my youngest sister,
really see things similarly sometimes, and you and Williss sometimes
get frustrated because we're like, hey.
Speaker 1 (13:20):
I know, I know, I see it. Trust me.
Speaker 2 (13:24):
That's the other thing is you're very aware as a mommy,
Like you're very in tune with like I don't know
just how we see you. And I mean because you.
Speaker 1 (13:35):
Guys are my everything. Like work is important to me,
my marriage is important to me. Yeah, and my fam
my home is important to me. And that is it.
Like but you guys with your other children, oh yeah them,
but my fur babies. But you guys have always been
my number one priority, no matter what, does not matter.
And I think most moms would say that, but you
(13:57):
don't really understand that until you become a mommy, your
priorities just shift. And it's okay that I was actually
relieved when I had a kid because I could shift
the attention off of myself, which I'm not comfortable you know,
worrying or thinking or being like too self important. You know, yeah,
(14:19):
that was like so great for me to be able
to have you guys that I could put all my
love and energy into. And it's so reciprocated because everything
I've ever given to you girls has been returned to
me tenfold, and you guys teach me every day how
to be a better person.
Speaker 2 (14:38):
Thank you, Mom, I mean, I love you too because
I missed you.
Speaker 1 (14:48):
I hold each other's hands, don't we We do?
Speaker 2 (14:50):
We do hold each other's hands. And I was going
to say that you it might be normal for a
mom to make their kids the priority, but I feel
like you've taught us to make our family priory and
to make just I feel like as a daughter, my
mom my dad were always my priority to like, even
in my like teenage angsty years, which were very short.
(15:11):
I think, really, let's talk about those. I don't have
like a long like teenage period, but I still think
like my family was always the most important thing to me.
Speaker 1 (15:23):
Yeah, yep, for sure. So I have a question. Oh, yes,
you know I'm doing a podcast now, right.
Speaker 2 (15:32):
Yes, I'm like a super fan. I actually listened this
morning on my way to work on my subway commute.
I I'm such I literally, I'm so proud of you.
I really love it. I feel like it's such You're
just a great storyteller. It's just so you like the
way you tell stories. I listened to the Dave episode,
so the episode of my stepdad, and I was given
(15:55):
a shout out.
Speaker 1 (15:56):
You talk about how you didn't want us to get married.
Speaker 2 (15:59):
Yes, that story is really funny. They like showed up
at my school and we're like, hey, we're getting married.
And I was eating my little sushi bowl that you
brought me with my chopsticks, and I was like, I
do not approve.
Speaker 1 (16:13):
Yep, I remember, trust me, but you.
Speaker 2 (16:16):
Still want ahead with it. So it's right. And it
was a really really beautiful wedding. And I think you
obviously had way more like perspective on everything than me
at seventeen, but she just wanted to protect her mommy,
a little seventeen year old.
Speaker 1 (16:32):
I know you always do. You girls are so fiercely
protective of me.
Speaker 2 (16:37):
It's crazy.
Speaker 1 (16:39):
I wouldn't want to be a dude walking in here
date me or marry me.
Speaker 2 (16:57):
Do you remember my one rule when you were dating
a little bit? No, I was like, they can come,
but they have to bring us gifts to the house.
Like it was like I wanted them to be like
old fashioned suitors, like bring like a fruit play or
like a little snack or something plight you just like snacks.
Speaker 1 (17:13):
Let's just leave it at that.
Speaker 2 (17:14):
I needed you to have like suitors like in the
nineteenth century.
Speaker 1 (17:18):
Well you, that's the thing about you, You, Luca, are
a nineteenth century like heroin You were you were you?
And I love reading our period pieces, our books and
watching our Buccaneer Center. What else? What other show do
we just love?
Speaker 2 (17:37):
Yeah, we get a little obsessed with things like.
Speaker 1 (17:44):
We see, like we choose to see life like that
because it's so much prettier, just more I don't know, rewarding.
Speaker 2 (17:54):
So I don't know, it was very simple. It feels
like a idealized time, but obviously they had their own
chaos problems.
Speaker 1 (18:04):
I was wondering. I was asking a question I forgot about.
Oh podcast, So oh yeah, but the podcast I choose.
Speaker 2 (18:11):
I'm a super fan, Yes, superfan.
Speaker 1 (18:13):
You've listened to it. You haven't been on it yet,
but you will.
Speaker 2 (18:17):
Well, you told me this is like my audition. So
that's why I'm nervous today because I want to be
on yours, but I honored to be on this.
Speaker 1 (18:26):
What do you think about Like you're listening to me
and your little ears on your subway, and it's just
me and you in that moment, you're the only one
listening to it, But actually the entire world can listen
to what I'm saying, And sometimes I think of that.
I'm like, whoa first of all, but also what do
you think of it? As my daughter?
Speaker 2 (18:45):
Like?
Speaker 1 (18:46):
How do you feel with me putting myself out there
in such a vulnerable way and talking about things I've
never talked about and talking about our lives?
Speaker 2 (18:54):
I think it takes immense courage. I think that I
just really, I'm proud of you for telling me your story,
and I'm excited to see you where else you go
with it. I'm excited to hear stories I've never heard
before because obviously I am your daughter and one of
your closest friends, but there's probably still some story that
(19:15):
I've never heard, so I'm excited to hear those. And
I'm it's just like you get to live in my
ears right like all day when I'm like all so,
but it's just it's been fun so far. So I'm
excited for the gross and I really love the messaging
of it about choosing yourself first, and that's something that
you have always instilled in me as a daughter, putting
(19:38):
my strength and myself first. Yeah, so I'm excited for
other people who need to learn that wisdom too, to
get to learn and hear more from your experiences.
Speaker 1 (19:52):
Well, I feel like I've always taught you guys that
that you are the director of your life. You are
the CEO of your company called you you. It's you
are in charge. And I've always wanted to make sure
you girls know that and like live your life leading
(20:15):
with that because you have everything it takes to go
out in the world and do whatever you want. And
I've always really tried to make you guys feel confident
and strong and know also how to be safe in
a world that isn't always welcoming to confident and strong women.
Speaker 2 (20:38):
And like the day to day as you were talking
about in the beginning of this kind of beats you down.
It's just hard in the real world. And I feel
like just coming back to the foundation that you gave
us and like a little reminder. Now it's a podcast
when I get to listen to your advice on repeat,
and it's just the daily little reminder that I need,
(20:58):
you know, to keep my head up.
Speaker 1 (21:01):
Yeah, and you know what, you are also really talented writer,
and I turned to you often for things.
Speaker 2 (21:14):
You a little bit, but honestly, like you are doing
it on your own, Like this is such a passion
project for you, and I'm just really proud to support you.
Like sometimes I write little messages before she'll record the podcast,
but I feel like it's just like inspiration for you
to jump off of because it's all there. And yeah,
I feel like you're just a really good interviewer too,
(21:36):
Like I love hearing you in conversation with other people,
so I'm excited to hear even more and all the
guests you'll have on in the future. It's just the
beginning the beginning, just the beginning. Yeah, I love that
this show exists, So thank you Beth and for creating it,
because it's really cool to hear like all the different
mother daughter duos. And I know that this show is
(21:56):
just starting too, so I'm excited to see where this grows,
because Yeah, I just feel like mother and daughter relationships
are so special, and yeah, I feel like they're they're
all so different. It's just interesting to hear that the
line seems a lot of different mommy and daddy to do.
Speaker 1 (22:14):
Yeah, I had a really different relationship with my mom
than any of you have with me, and I I
think I've really done that intentionally because the relationship I
have with my mom. I love my mom. My Mom's
one of the smartest people I know. She has taught
me everything I know and more, and I have so
(22:37):
much respect for her and what she's done over the
course of her life. Now, of course, she's in her
eighties and it's hard, you know, to watch me me
getting older, and but she's always been such a fire cracker,
so full of it.
Speaker 2 (22:54):
I wonder where gem I know my mom is.
Speaker 1 (22:57):
Like a deep, deep river and had I didn't really
value that as much as I do now, because I
don't know why. I was just probably like I always
felt like maybe not the best daughter because I didn't
really let my mom in as much as I make
you guys let me in.
Speaker 2 (23:19):
I feel like that relationship has definitely ebbed and flowed
where there were periods where she was less involved in
your life. I think you've made it a priority where
you want to be like super involved in all three
of our lives, you know, yeah, yeah, but yeah, it's
interesting generationally because my Memi and I have our own
(23:39):
separate relationship, then you and your mom, you know, like
that's your mom, but it's also my grandmother, and it's
just interesting to see like the generations of women and.
Speaker 1 (23:50):
What a great Memi you have. She taught you to
read so early, remember, I.
Speaker 2 (23:55):
Know, and you were working a lot when I was
very very little. So if we have anything maybe grateful
for it is that she was right there and she
was very present and helpful for you when we were
working so hard. And yeah, that's another huge reason that
I have a lot of respect for you, is because
you were a super mom, Like you were literally taking
me to set with you and making time to be
(24:17):
a mother amongst like the craziness of filming, the long
hours that you did when you're shooting now, I don't know,
you know.
Speaker 1 (24:24):
Yeah, I would wake you up at like five am.
We'll try to not wake you up at one month old. Yeah,
get you strapped into a car seat in the dark,
take you to work in the dark. And you're Nina.
Who when when Mimi wasn't on the job, it was Nina.
And Nina's been with us and she's helped me raise
(24:48):
you girls. She's like a second mom to me and
I know to you guys.
Speaker 2 (24:53):
But for Mother's Day, we celebrate you Mina and me.
That's right anyway. So yeah, you'd take me to work
with you, which is crazy because you were literally working
(25:15):
on a teen show. So that must have been like
the disorienting so weird.
Speaker 1 (25:19):
I was, like, you know, Kelly Taylor, like hot stuff,
And meantime, my boobs were hurting because it was time
to go back to the trailer and feed you.
Speaker 2 (25:28):
Like.
Speaker 1 (25:28):
It was really the weirdest time for me because I
didn't I didn't have the same identity that I had
a month earlier, and I and nobody.
Speaker 2 (25:40):
Was your like maternal leave or like break or did
you not want one?
Speaker 1 (25:44):
Literally? Man, Yeah, for all of you, I think, oh
except Fiona. I had a little more time with Fiona
before I went back to work. But yeah, it was
like I was living two lives. I was living like
the life of you know, young little starlet Kelly Taylor whatever,
playing actress. And then I.
Speaker 2 (26:04):
Would whatever drama she was going through, Yeah, she went
through it.
Speaker 1 (26:09):
Yeah, And then I would after they would call cut,
I would run literally back to wherever you were the
baby trailer and I would be like, Okay, let me
give her to me, let me feed her, like I
wanted to be with you all the time.
Speaker 2 (26:26):
Yeah, you made me a priority, which is kind of
going back to choosing, like what was important to you,
and you just chose to have me be part of
the deal. You know, I was going it was a
two for Yeah. And you did that with Lola too,
which is like, it's just hard to be working mom.
(26:47):
A lot of them, a lot of moms have to
go through that, like balancing work and real life.
Speaker 1 (26:55):
It's so so much more than people even know or
give it, give women and mom's credit for. And I
was so fortunate and blessed to be able to take
my girls with me to work and bring someone along
like Nina or Mimi to help me while when I
did have to go to set, and I was very
(27:15):
fortunate to be in that position, because so often women
aren't able to take their children to work with them,
or there's no childcare available. And I think that that's
something we should all We should definitely change, you know,
societal because babies belong with their mommies. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (27:35):
Still, I still feel like I.
Speaker 1 (27:40):
Could talk to you all day long, Luca Bella.
Speaker 2 (27:43):
I feel like we usually do.
Speaker 1 (27:46):
Did you know your name is Luca Bella?
Speaker 2 (27:49):
Okay, so that this is actually a problem in my
life because my parents have given me an identity crisis.
Who were like, I don't know how to spell my
name and my mom spells it because.
Speaker 1 (28:01):
Your dad and I. Another one of the things that
we don't agree with.
Speaker 2 (28:06):
Is giving me some very difficult paperwork and legal issues,
all thanks to you.
Speaker 1 (28:13):
Well, your name is Luca Bella, girth Faction Elli. And
don't you forget it.
Speaker 2 (28:19):
It's a full title. Your name is Jennifer Eve Garth.
That's it, Abrams.
Speaker 1 (28:26):
No, Well, I guess marital maritally legal, yes, But I
kept I always kept my own name. I hope you
guys will too.
Speaker 2 (28:41):
Because yeah, that's your title. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (28:44):
I don't really get why a woman needs to give
up her name just because she gets married. That's never
made sense to me.
Speaker 2 (28:52):
Sometimes peopel like the sound the ring of a new
last that's something fun, Like what if you were like
Jennifer Jones. There's something like really fun. I don't know.
Speaker 1 (29:02):
And it's your choice. You can change your name, whatever
you want.
Speaker 2 (29:05):
To choose, whatever you want to choose, you to choose
whatever shipped to steer h But I'm just really excited
for all that to come, and hopefully I did a
good job and you'll have me on.
Speaker 1 (29:20):
Yes, you've you've passed, you've passed the audition. You've won
the role as my daughter.
Speaker 2 (29:29):
I love you, I love you.
Hey everybody. I'm Jenny Garth and I am joined today
on the Mommy and Me podcast by my me. This
is my little me.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
Hi, I'm the me. I'm Luca Bella. I'm Jenny's oldest daughter.
Speaker 1 (00:25):
You're my first little baby me. Yes, it's your first,
my first born. We are taking over Bethany's podcast today.
This is pretty fun.
Speaker 2 (00:36):
It's just like hanging out. Though I purposely didn't call
you earlier because I was like, we gotta have some
juice for the for the pod. I call you like
choice to day three times a day before before noon.
Speaker 1 (00:47):
For those of the of you that don't know, Luca
is living in New York City now and I'm living
in California, So we're a by coastal mommy and me.
Speaker 2 (00:59):
Longest and relationship. We make it work.
Speaker 1 (01:04):
We make it work.
Speaker 2 (01:05):
We we're honestly together a lot.
Speaker 1 (01:07):
Yeah. We zoom while I'm driving, which is probably not
a good idea. We zoom while we're making dinner at
our different houses. Anytime you go on the subway, I
feel like you zoom me because then I have a
panic attack.
Speaker 2 (01:23):
Also, it's like very loud and you're like, why are
you going me? At the loudest moment.
Speaker 1 (01:27):
That's the worst. But every time you go to the
subway and you're I can hear you like click click click,
like walking downstairs. I can hear like the thing, like
the money when you put the card, and the like
turnstile thing. And then I can hear you standing there waiting,
and my mind is just racing with all the bad
things that could happen to you down there. And then
(01:47):
this is the best part. We'll be talking mid sentence,
I'll just lose you.
Speaker 2 (01:52):
Yeah, I'll cut out. Yeah, sorry, let the subway.
Speaker 1 (01:56):
Yeah yeah, But you know what happens to my mommy
brain at that point, I'm like full blown panic. What
someone's pushed her onto the tracks, There's been a gunfight,
I don't know. I think of the worst possible scenarios
when that happens.
Speaker 2 (02:11):
Usually I'm just hanging up on you. I'm sorry. I
do abruptly out a lot.
Speaker 1 (02:16):
Oh, well, you are a big girl. I guess I
should let you take the subway.
Speaker 2 (02:23):
I you know, I am out here hustling. I'm out
here grinding, so every day you never.
Speaker 1 (02:29):
Know, You're not kidding. Living in New York City is
a ussle. It's a grind.
Speaker 2 (02:34):
Yeah. They say that New York is hard on the body,
but Ela is hard on the soul. They say, I've
heard that. I think it's funny because La is a
little dryer. I feel like New York you just get
like so much culture and so much you know, energy.
So I feel like it's a really good place for
me at this chapter in my life, but definitely definitely
(02:55):
a harder place to live.
Speaker 1 (02:58):
Yeah. Every time I come to visit you in New
York's city, we walk at least fourteen thousand steps in
a day.
Speaker 2 (03:06):
Well, I feel like I'm hard on you, and we
come because I really love to walk, so you do,
Oh it's only two blocks away, and then I'll there
minutes later. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (03:14):
The thing we all know about you is you lie
about how far our destination is. Because you'll say it's
two blocks, and in two blocks, I'll be like, are
we here yet? You say no, no, no, it's just
two more blocks. And that happens over and over and over,
and Yeah. I don't know why you do that. I
guess you don't want me to know how far it is,
(03:35):
because you know, I'll be like, let's get in a taxi.
Speaker 2 (03:37):
I feel like it feels like two blocks to me,
but to other people.
Speaker 1 (03:43):
Well, your legs are really long, right, and you are
so used to that life, like I'm used to getting
in my car to go wherever I want.
Speaker 2 (03:52):
I feel like you have a pretty good setup when
you ride around. You have your music, you have your dogs,
like I wish I'm fighting to the New York cold.
Speaker 1 (04:02):
Yeah. I have a lot of respect for you, Luca.
I mean I have a lot of respect for you
just because you're amazing, but also because you make living
in New York City look easy, and I know it's
not easy.
Speaker 2 (04:22):
To My mom is telling me I should start like
a TikTok on how to live in New York for
five dollars a day, because.
Speaker 1 (04:27):
I definitely yeah, tell them.
Speaker 2 (04:30):
I've been known to stretch a dollar in New York City.
Speaker 1 (04:33):
You are a magician when it comes to cash money, Like,
I don't know how you do it. You don't. This
girl can literally live in New York City on five
dollars a week if she wanted to.
Speaker 2 (04:46):
Yeah, because you killer problem.
Speaker 1 (04:50):
But where do you think that that ability came from?
Speaker 2 (04:56):
You're good a budget. You always taught me to be
smart with money, But I just also just like I
feel like I have like a less a zest for life,
Like I like to like do a lot. So it's
about like getting as much done as possible, and you know,
you got to stretch it when you can.
Speaker 1 (05:12):
Yeah, but you can get into any door with that
smile of yours and your personality. You can get into
any museum for free. Like, I don't know how you
do it. You're a master at all of that. I
have a lot of respect for you.
Speaker 2 (05:27):
I have a lot of respect for you. I feel
like that's one of my favorite things about our adult
mother daughter relationship is that it's founded on really great
mutual respect. And I don't really know when that started.
Do you remember, because I feel like we've always been
really close. But I feel like as I've gotten older
and you've gotten older, it's just really deepened in a
(05:48):
really beautiful way.
Speaker 1 (05:50):
Yeah. Well, first of all, I haven't gotten older.
Speaker 2 (05:55):
You are a rich one. No.
Speaker 1 (05:58):
I We've always had such a good relationship. You were
the baby, you were the first child that your dad
and I had, and we were so young, Oh my god,
So it was like we were growing up together. I
think that's probably one of the things that bonded us
the most, and when I had you, like nothing else mattered.
(06:21):
All that mattered was spending time with you. So we
spent so much time together.
Speaker 2 (06:26):
But I still feel like you're that way, like anytime
we have time off or any time you're not working,
like we're together or we're making plans to meet up
somewhere and have an adventure, Like I think that's something
you really made a value in your motherhood, is presence
and being there and always showing up. And yeah, I
just really am inspired by that.
Speaker 1 (06:49):
Oh thanks Lou. Yeah, it's really hard on me having
you live in New York, I'll be honest, but you
already know that I tried not to put it on you.
Speaker 2 (07:00):
I love how you text me every night or at
least every day once a day and like saco nay
or check in. Like, I still feel like you're very
present in my life.
Speaker 1 (07:10):
I don't know if I think that's called helicopter mom.
Speaker 2 (07:13):
No, I think you're the opposite. I don't think you
ever were like super involved in like my decisions. I
think you're very like hands off, And that's going back
to the mutual respect thing. It's like you just trust
me to make the best decisions for myself. And yeah,
I just I love your parenting style. I hope if
(07:34):
I'm ever a mommy that can be as good mommy
as you thought.
Speaker 1 (07:38):
I can't wait till you're a mommy.
Speaker 2 (07:41):
Told me many times. I'm alone.
Speaker 1 (07:45):
I like babies.
Speaker 2 (07:46):
No no, no, no, no, you're right, just wait, keep waiting.
Speaker 1 (07:50):
But going back to that thing about parenting, I I
was looking through my old journals the other day and
I saw this part about like I don't know, I
was talking about being a parent, and I was kind
of defined my rule as a parent. It's if I
imagine a ping No, no, what's that thing? Your dad
has one with Elvis on it? The machine, the.
Speaker 2 (08:11):
Player ping pong ball, pinball.
Speaker 1 (08:14):
Pinball, pinball, Yes, if you have a okay, So it's
like a pinball machine, right, and I'm standing I'm playing it,
and I'm standing there, and I have the two buttons
on the side and they control the flippers.
Speaker 2 (08:25):
Right.
Speaker 1 (08:26):
So I launched you out, No, no, no, I can
only flippers. I launched you out of the huote that
little thing you pull back and you're like ding. And
when you go into the world into the ping ball machine,
and you ding did ding ding ding, did ding ding
ding ding ding, And then when you come down to me,
I'm right there to push my little flippers to like
(08:48):
get you back up there. And I feel like that's all.
That's all I'm supposed to do as a mom, is
just keep you going on your life and be there
to help you and keep you from falling down on
the shoes.
Speaker 2 (09:04):
I don't want to fall down there.
Speaker 1 (09:06):
No, So that's that's my parenting analogy for the day.
You're welcome.
Speaker 2 (09:11):
No, it's really really true, and I think it's kind
of rare because I have a lot of friends and
you know, even family members where their parents are way
more involved, and I feel like you're just what you said,
like somebody to kind of like support but not be
two hands on.
Speaker 1 (09:26):
You know, I have so much respect for each of
you girls, you and your sisters, because I know what
(09:47):
is inside of you, and I know what each of
you are capable of, and I know what each of
your strong suits are and where you need a little
bit more, you know, guidance or support, and and I
really think that having that support and that respect, having
that respect for your your young teenagers or girls as
(10:10):
they get older in life I think that's vital to
a healthy mother daughter relationship because I'm not as much
your mommy now as I am your friend or your
sort of mentor kind of a vibe. And I really
take that seriously.
Speaker 2 (10:26):
Yeah, well, I'm the oldest, so I feel like you
kind of spread us each like there's five years kind
of between each of us, and so we're all at
different chapters in our lives and we all kind of
need different things. And I feel like you're really good
about individualizing our parenting, like not just you know, kind
of can go out making us one. So yeah, I
(10:48):
feel like, is that hard for you as a mom
to like hit our different needs at different times? You
have no idea? So I feel like I always kept
more in the childhood world for a long time because
we're very siblings. Like Sanna came until I was like
twenty one. You know it still come.
Speaker 1 (11:08):
But yeah, you've got five years. First of all, you
got five years completely on your own, best years ever know,
before your first sister Lola came along. No, but you
say always that's the best gift you ever got.
Speaker 2 (11:22):
Best gift I ever got. And it's funny because when
you told me about Lola, you were like, I'm giving
you this gift, like this is a huge responsibility as
a big sister, Like you'll have her as a best
friend forever. And I feel like that's how I shape
my whole view of being a sister, is that this
is like my best friend playmate that I get to have,
and you gave her to me. So I have so
(11:43):
much to be grateful to you for.
Speaker 1 (11:45):
You're welcome, and then I gave you another one.
Speaker 2 (11:47):
Yeah, thank you.
Speaker 1 (11:49):
You're so lucky to have. I have sisters, you know, like.
Speaker 2 (11:56):
That are older older than me. You're the youngest, I'm
the oldest. This is they're like.
Speaker 1 (12:01):
Half My sisters are all half sisters. Though they have
different dads, they'll have the same mom. But we're very
different then, you know, we have very different lifestyles, each
one of us. And I always really it was really
always so important to me when I had you guys,
to keep you together forever, whether you wanted it or not.
Speaker 2 (12:24):
But we mostly wanted it. Like I feel like to
this day, like we still want to hang out all
the time, like us girls, like the Garth Girls is
what we call ourselves, and like we are such a
unit and we've been through so much together, and I
think we really value just like being strong, independent women together.
Speaker 1 (12:43):
Yeah. I couldn't be prouder of you, baby.
Speaker 2 (12:45):
But that's an interesting thing because you have older sisters
and I have younger sisters. So how do you think
that makes us different the way we look at well,
our birth order. You know, there's a there's something to theory. Yeah,
birth order is like a big thing. Like you're the
oldest and that's a whole different cup of tea.
Speaker 1 (13:03):
I'm the baby of my family.
Speaker 2 (13:05):
Yep.
Speaker 1 (13:06):
Yeah, that's snotty brat sometimes.
Speaker 2 (13:10):
Well I think you and Fiona, who's my youngest sister,
really see things similarly sometimes, and you and Williss sometimes
get frustrated because we're like, hey.
Speaker 1 (13:20):
I know, I know, I see it. Trust me.
Speaker 2 (13:24):
That's the other thing is you're very aware as a mommy,
Like you're very in tune with like I don't know
just how we see you. And I mean because you.
Speaker 1 (13:35):
Guys are my everything. Like work is important to me,
my marriage is important to me. Yeah, and my fam
my home is important to me. And that is it.
Like but you guys with your other children, oh yeah them,
but my fur babies. But you guys have always been
my number one priority, no matter what, does not matter.
And I think most moms would say that, but you
(13:57):
don't really understand that until you become a mommy, your
priorities just shift. And it's okay that I was actually
relieved when I had a kid because I could shift
the attention off of myself, which I'm not comfortable you know,
worrying or thinking or being like too self important. You know, yeah,
(14:19):
that was like so great for me to be able
to have you guys that I could put all my
love and energy into. And it's so reciprocated because everything
I've ever given to you girls has been returned to
me tenfold, and you guys teach me every day how
to be a better person.
Speaker 2 (14:38):
Thank you, Mom, I mean, I love you too because
I missed you.
Speaker 1 (14:48):
I hold each other's hands, don't we We do?
Speaker 2 (14:50):
We do hold each other's hands. And I was going
to say that you it might be normal for a
mom to make their kids the priority, but I feel
like you've taught us to make our family priory and
to make just I feel like as a daughter, my
mom my dad were always my priority to like, even
in my like teenage angsty years, which were very short.
(15:11):
I think, really, let's talk about those. I don't have
like a long like teenage period, but I still think
like my family was always the most important thing to me.
Speaker 1 (15:23):
Yeah, yep, for sure. So I have a question. Oh, yes,
you know I'm doing a podcast now, right.
Speaker 2 (15:32):
Yes, I'm like a super fan. I actually listened this
morning on my way to work on my subway commute.
I I'm such I literally, I'm so proud of you.
I really love it. I feel like it's such You're
just a great storyteller. It's just so you like the
way you tell stories. I listened to the Dave episode,
so the episode of my stepdad, and I was given
(15:55):
a shout out.
Speaker 1 (15:56):
You talk about how you didn't want us to get married.
Speaker 2 (15:59):
Yes, that story is really funny. They like showed up
at my school and we're like, hey, we're getting married.
And I was eating my little sushi bowl that you
brought me with my chopsticks, and I was like, I
do not approve.
Speaker 1 (16:13):
Yep, I remember, trust me, but you.
Speaker 2 (16:16):
Still want ahead with it. So it's right. And it
was a really really beautiful wedding. And I think you
obviously had way more like perspective on everything than me
at seventeen, but she just wanted to protect her mommy,
a little seventeen year old.
Speaker 1 (16:32):
I know you always do. You girls are so fiercely
protective of me.
Speaker 2 (16:37):
It's crazy.
Speaker 1 (16:39):
I wouldn't want to be a dude walking in here
date me or marry me.
Speaker 2 (16:57):
Do you remember my one rule when you were dating
a little bit? No, I was like, they can come,
but they have to bring us gifts to the house.
Like it was like I wanted them to be like
old fashioned suitors, like bring like a fruit play or
like a little snack or something plight you just like snacks.
Speaker 1 (17:13):
Let's just leave it at that.
Speaker 2 (17:14):
I needed you to have like suitors like in the
nineteenth century.
Speaker 1 (17:18):
Well you, that's the thing about you, You, Luca, are
a nineteenth century like heroin You were you were you?
And I love reading our period pieces, our books and
watching our Buccaneer Center. What else? What other show do
we just love?
Speaker 2 (17:37):
Yeah, we get a little obsessed with things like.
Speaker 1 (17:44):
We see, like we choose to see life like that
because it's so much prettier, just more I don't know, rewarding.
Speaker 2 (17:54):
So I don't know, it was very simple. It feels
like a idealized time, but obviously they had their own
chaos problems.
Speaker 1 (18:04):
I was wondering. I was asking a question I forgot about.
Oh podcast, So oh yeah, but the podcast I choose.
Speaker 2 (18:11):
I'm a super fan, Yes, superfan.
Speaker 1 (18:13):
You've listened to it. You haven't been on it yet,
but you will.
Speaker 2 (18:17):
Well, you told me this is like my audition. So
that's why I'm nervous today because I want to be
on yours, but I honored to be on this.
Speaker 1 (18:26):
What do you think about Like you're listening to me
and your little ears on your subway, and it's just
me and you in that moment, you're the only one
listening to it, But actually the entire world can listen
to what I'm saying, And sometimes I think of that.
I'm like, whoa first of all, but also what do
you think of it? As my daughter?
Speaker 2 (18:45):
Like?
Speaker 1 (18:46):
How do you feel with me putting myself out there
in such a vulnerable way and talking about things I've
never talked about and talking about our lives?
Speaker 2 (18:54):
I think it takes immense courage. I think that I
just really, I'm proud of you for telling me your story,
and I'm excited to see you where else you go
with it. I'm excited to hear stories I've never heard
before because obviously I am your daughter and one of
your closest friends, but there's probably still some story that
(19:15):
I've never heard, so I'm excited to hear those. And
I'm it's just like you get to live in my
ears right like all day when I'm like all so,
but it's just it's been fun so far. So I'm
excited for the gross and I really love the messaging
of it about choosing yourself first, and that's something that
you have always instilled in me as a daughter, putting
(19:38):
my strength and myself first. Yeah, so I'm excited for
other people who need to learn that wisdom too, to
get to learn and hear more from your experiences.
Speaker 1 (19:52):
Well, I feel like I've always taught you guys that
that you are the director of your life. You are
the CEO of your company called you you. It's you
are in charge. And I've always wanted to make sure
you girls know that and like live your life leading
(20:15):
with that because you have everything it takes to go
out in the world and do whatever you want. And
I've always really tried to make you guys feel confident
and strong and know also how to be safe in
a world that isn't always welcoming to confident and strong women.
Speaker 2 (20:38):
And like the day to day as you were talking
about in the beginning of this kind of beats you down.
It's just hard in the real world. And I feel
like just coming back to the foundation that you gave
us and like a little reminder. Now it's a podcast
when I get to listen to your advice on repeat,
and it's just the daily little reminder that I need,
(20:58):
you know, to keep my head up.
Speaker 1 (21:01):
Yeah, and you know what, you are also really talented writer,
and I turned to you often for things.
Speaker 2 (21:14):
You a little bit, but honestly, like you are doing
it on your own, Like this is such a passion
project for you, and I'm just really proud to support you.
Like sometimes I write little messages before she'll record the podcast,
but I feel like it's just like inspiration for you
to jump off of because it's all there. And yeah,
I feel like you're just a really good interviewer too,
(21:36):
Like I love hearing you in conversation with other people,
so I'm excited to hear even more and all the
guests you'll have on in the future. It's just the
beginning the beginning, just the beginning. Yeah, I love that
this show exists, So thank you Beth and for creating it,
because it's really cool to hear like all the different
mother daughter duos. And I know that this show is
(21:56):
just starting too, so I'm excited to see where this grows,
because Yeah, I just feel like mother and daughter relationships
are so special, and yeah, I feel like they're they're
all so different. It's just interesting to hear that the
line seems a lot of different mommy and daddy to do.
Speaker 1 (22:14):
Yeah, I had a really different relationship with my mom
than any of you have with me, and I I
think I've really done that intentionally because the relationship I
have with my mom. I love my mom. My Mom's
one of the smartest people I know. She has taught
me everything I know and more, and I have so
(22:37):
much respect for her and what she's done over the
course of her life. Now, of course, she's in her
eighties and it's hard, you know, to watch me me
getting older, and but she's always been such a fire cracker,
so full of it.
Speaker 2 (22:54):
I wonder where gem I know my mom is.
Speaker 1 (22:57):
Like a deep, deep river and had I didn't really
value that as much as I do now, because I
don't know why. I was just probably like I always
felt like maybe not the best daughter because I didn't
really let my mom in as much as I make
you guys let me in.
Speaker 2 (23:19):
I feel like that relationship has definitely ebbed and flowed
where there were periods where she was less involved in
your life. I think you've made it a priority where
you want to be like super involved in all three
of our lives, you know, yeah, yeah, but yeah, it's
interesting generationally because my Memi and I have our own
(23:39):
separate relationship, then you and your mom, you know, like
that's your mom, but it's also my grandmother, and it's
just interesting to see like the generations of women and.
Speaker 1 (23:50):
What a great Memi you have. She taught you to
read so early, remember, I.
Speaker 2 (23:55):
Know, and you were working a lot when I was
very very little. So if we have anything maybe grateful
for it is that she was right there and she
was very present and helpful for you when we were
working so hard. And yeah, that's another huge reason that
I have a lot of respect for you, is because
you were a super mom, Like you were literally taking
me to set with you and making time to be
(24:17):
a mother amongst like the craziness of filming, the long
hours that you did when you're shooting now, I don't know,
you know.
Speaker 1 (24:24):
Yeah, I would wake you up at like five am.
We'll try to not wake you up at one month old. Yeah,
get you strapped into a car seat in the dark,
take you to work in the dark. And you're Nina.
Who when when Mimi wasn't on the job, it was Nina.
And Nina's been with us and she's helped me raise
(24:48):
you girls. She's like a second mom to me and
I know to you guys.
Speaker 2 (24:53):
But for Mother's Day, we celebrate you Mina and me.
That's right anyway. So yeah, you'd take me to work
with you, which is crazy because you were literally working
(25:15):
on a teen show. So that must have been like
the disorienting so weird.
Speaker 1 (25:19):
I was, like, you know, Kelly Taylor, like hot stuff,
And meantime, my boobs were hurting because it was time
to go back to the trailer and feed you.
Speaker 2 (25:28):
Like.
Speaker 1 (25:28):
It was really the weirdest time for me because I
didn't I didn't have the same identity that I had
a month earlier, and I and nobody.
Speaker 2 (25:40):
Was your like maternal leave or like break or did
you not want one?
Speaker 1 (25:44):
Literally? Man, Yeah, for all of you, I think, oh
except Fiona. I had a little more time with Fiona
before I went back to work. But yeah, it was
like I was living two lives. I was living like
the life of you know, young little starlet Kelly Taylor whatever,
playing actress. And then I.
Speaker 2 (26:04):
Would whatever drama she was going through, Yeah, she went
through it.
Speaker 1 (26:09):
Yeah, And then I would after they would call cut,
I would run literally back to wherever you were the
baby trailer and I would be like, Okay, let me
give her to me, let me feed her, like I
wanted to be with you all the time.
Speaker 2 (26:26):
Yeah, you made me a priority, which is kind of
going back to choosing, like what was important to you,
and you just chose to have me be part of
the deal. You know, I was going it was a
two for Yeah. And you did that with Lola too,
which is like, it's just hard to be working mom.
(26:47):
A lot of them, a lot of moms have to
go through that, like balancing work and real life.
Speaker 1 (26:55):
It's so so much more than people even know or
give it, give women and mom's credit for. And I
was so fortunate and blessed to be able to take
my girls with me to work and bring someone along
like Nina or Mimi to help me while when I
did have to go to set, and I was very
(27:15):
fortunate to be in that position, because so often women
aren't able to take their children to work with them,
or there's no childcare available. And I think that that's
something we should all We should definitely change, you know,
societal because babies belong with their mommies. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (27:35):
Still, I still feel like I.
Speaker 1 (27:40):
Could talk to you all day long, Luca Bella.
Speaker 2 (27:43):
I feel like we usually do.
Speaker 1 (27:46):
Did you know your name is Luca Bella?
Speaker 2 (27:49):
Okay, so that this is actually a problem in my
life because my parents have given me an identity crisis.
Who were like, I don't know how to spell my
name and my mom spells it because.
Speaker 1 (28:01):
Your dad and I. Another one of the things that
we don't agree with.
Speaker 2 (28:06):
Is giving me some very difficult paperwork and legal issues,
all thanks to you.
Speaker 1 (28:13):
Well, your name is Luca Bella, girth Faction Elli. And
don't you forget it.
Speaker 2 (28:19):
It's a full title. Your name is Jennifer Eve Garth.
That's it, Abrams.
Speaker 1 (28:26):
No, Well, I guess marital maritally legal, yes, But I
kept I always kept my own name. I hope you
guys will too.
Speaker 2 (28:41):
Because yeah, that's your title. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (28:44):
I don't really get why a woman needs to give
up her name just because she gets married. That's never
made sense to me.
Speaker 2 (28:52):
Sometimes peopel like the sound the ring of a new
last that's something fun, Like what if you were like
Jennifer Jones. There's something like really fun. I don't know.
Speaker 1 (29:02):
And it's your choice. You can change your name, whatever
you want.
Speaker 2 (29:05):
To choose, whatever you want to choose, you to choose
whatever shipped to steer h But I'm just really excited
for all that to come, and hopefully I did a
good job and you'll have me on.
Speaker 1 (29:20):
Yes, you've you've passed, you've passed the audition. You've won
the role as my daughter.
Speaker 2 (29:29):
I love you, I love you.
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