November 24, 2023 • 17 mins
'Tis the season…for secrets behind Bethenny’s holiday gifting obsession to finally be revealed. Plus, find out how Bethenny embarrassed herself while meeting Adam Sandler!
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:11):
When they say the holiday season, I think we all
think that it starts with Thanksgiving. The holiday season starts
with Halloween. And let me explain why. Because the pumpkins
are out and so you kind of can markt the
you can kind of market the pumpkins to move into Thanksgiving.
Like I still have some pumpkin to core upstairs, and
I'm just like, yeah, people eat pumpkin pie at Thanksgiving,
Like we can leave. It can't be like ghosty or
(00:34):
like scary or witchy. That's Halloween. But like just the
autumnal pumpkin things, you can mark it. So when you're
buying Halloween to Cord, just do me a favor. Don't
buy the ghosts and the witches. They don't last. Just
buy the pumpkin stuff because it can last. A pumpkin
patch can last to Thanksgiving, so like that's something that
can last. But what does happen is once Halloween happens
(00:54):
and you start taking out decorations and putting away costumes
and getting sort of sordid and like that, then you
have to start thinking about Christmas. Thanksgiving is the middle
child because you have to start thinking about Christmas. Because
here's why. Once it's November, which is the day after Halloween,
I get going with the presents. Halloween. I was with Laney,
who works with me, and we went through all the
(01:15):
gifts because once then it's my birthday November, and then
everybody's getting organized for Thanksgiving. What are you doing for Thanksgiving?
What do you cook you for Thanksgiving? Where are you
going for Thanksgiving? When are you taking the kids out
for Thanksgiving? How long is their break for Thanksgiving? What
about the travel? What about the booking? What about the tickets?
What about the busiest travel day you're what about the traffic?
You're in full Thanksgiving mode. So now you're fucked because
(01:39):
the day after Thanksgiving is Black Friday. Then you're in
like mass present by Like you can't be basic like that,
so really effectively, the minute that Halloween is over, you're
in full Hunger Games, Game of Thrones, Christmas present shopping
and so Halloween I had the presence locked. I seemed insane.
I don't care. So yesterday lady and I dipped back
(02:02):
in because we allocated gifts. But like, you can't get
fucked on the wrapping either. You don't want to leave
the wrapping until after Thanksgiving either, because then you're scrambling,
you're buying, you're wrapping, you're planning for your Christmas break.
When does that start? Some kids start early, so you
get caught in the riptide. So what we did is
November fourteenth, we started the wrapping. I do like probably
(02:23):
two two fifty gifts. I know, it's insane that counts.
That includes like bottles of wine and nice gift bags
and hangtags, et cetera. So we wrapped probably one hundred
gifts yesterday, which is for other people clustered together, gifts
that can be shipped to the same place, like an
office that has three people that I'm sending gifts, so
like those are clustered together and can be shipped. So
(02:44):
we're now already boxing up things to be shipped, so
they're just like labeled, and we can't mail them now
because otherwise I'll be known as the psychotic person that
mails Christmas gifts in November. So the second the clock
strikes December, that's when we ship them out because you're
not in full like panic shipping mode. So then next
(03:05):
week we'll probably start. Then you're wrapping the gifts for
people closest to you. Because what happens is I have
the pall gifts, the bring gifts the people that work
with me, and those become last minute gifts and then
you're scrambling two days before. So I'm just saying, be
organized about it. I have my gift wrapping room, or
have a closet. I used to have just a closet.
I used to have just a cabinet. It went from
(03:25):
a cabinet to a closet to a room. So I
have a cabinet that has gifts that I buy all
year round. I'll buy something it's on sale. I'll buy
ten of them, men's doop kits, men's wallet's key chains.
See something, see something, say something, see something by it,
see something. It's a good dlc robes. Robes are good candles,
(03:46):
but I recommend that you buy things that are lightweight
and small. While it's a great key chains are great.
Anything that's like a small leather good is good because
it's not going to take up a lot of space.
Someone's really like it and you could just put it
in a closet all year for different holidays, birthdays, Mother's Days, gifts,
(04:08):
Father's Days, whatever. Yes, I'm crazy about Christmas and I
love it and I like to give way more than
to receive. I'm the person when someone says what do
you want and I say I don't need anything or
want anything. I really mean it, Like I really mean
that I don't need anything and don't want anything. I
don't know if most people mean that. I don't think
(04:29):
they do, but I really really mean it. I don't
want anything. I want it out. But I love to
give gifts. I like make excuses. Oh, that person is
nice to me. They're outside, Okay, they drove in the
driveway from DHL. Let's give him a gift. I'm like
the Oprah of small gifts. Brenda doesn't listen to my podcast,
so I'm just gonna say, are we still doing Santa
(04:49):
Gifts this year? I still believe in Santa Claus, so
I certainly hope she does. I have Santa mailbox and
she sent him letters. So I have a kid who's
very young. What's fri Because I was going to nightclubs
at her age and she still believes in Santa Claus.
So I'm doing something right. Went with Brinn on a
(05:17):
beach walk, took her for the weekend to La friends.
Friend had a charity event with Adam Sandler, David Spade,
Rob Schneider comedy concert for a great cause, Malibu Urgent Care,
as Rob Schneider said at the beginning of his act,
because rich people definitely need good health care too, which
is hilarious. But it is actually a really, really nice clinic.
(05:40):
And it was a really nice group of people. And
it was a small, intimate event in Malibu, which reminds
me of Montalk vibes. The way people dress with the
hats and their casual and like the you know, it
was an expensive charity event, and there were like buckets
of just like beverages. You could just grab your own out,
you know, if you wanted a water or soda, and
like there was donated food from Nobu and different burgers.
(06:04):
But it had a casual vibe. And my friend called me.
His name is Mark Gervitz. He represents a lot of
comedians over the years, like legendary comedians, like he represented
Chris Farley, and he works with David Spade and all
the big big names. And so Adam Sandler and David
Spade and Rob Schneider were doing comedy acts that night
at his house for this charity. And I had called
(06:25):
Mark and said listen. My daughter is so obsessed with
Adam Sandler, like she has seen each of his thirty
something movies. I didn't know he had thirty something movies.
Multiple times. He is her number one. I mean, put
Taylor Swift to the side, anyone to the side, justin Bieber.
Adam Sandler is her number one. Goat Okay. So I
said to him if he ever does anything, and he said, well,
(06:46):
you know, because of the strike, he's not doing anything.
And then one day he said, all right, this is
the time I'm doing something in my house. And she
and I were gonna go on vacation and I was like,
fuck it, we're canceling a vacation. We're going for a
girl strip for the weekend and we're gonna see Adam
Sandler perform. And we get an email saying nobody under
eighteen because the act is definitely not for kids. And
Mark's like, it's at my house, will jam it through.
(07:09):
We go to the house. Mark's lovely. His wife is
Juliane Phillips. She is wonderful and beautiful and so nice
and they have a gorgeous home. And just incidentally, she
used to be married to Bruce Springsteen, which is not
her identity. I'm just saying I've always known that she's stunning.
And Mark has us into his home and he says,
I'm gonna get I'll try. I'm gonna try to get
(07:30):
Adam to say hello to her. So the whole night
I'm on edge. I said to Brin, there's nothing I
can guarantee we're gonna see this show, and it's gonna
be an amazing experience to begin with that nobody gets
to do in the world. But I'll do what I can.
You know, I'm not a wizard. I cannot promise the
actions of someone else. I can try. So great group
of people, interesting people like power people too, like Hi's
and Low's local Malibu, and then you know Ted Sarandos,
(07:53):
who runs Netflix is there and I think he's good
friends with Thatam. And Jack Abernathy who helps get my
podc my talk show done from Fox, and just like
Pierce Brasnan's there. But then local vendors and all this
crazy stuff. And they have this big gorgeous floral cake
and his flowers all over it and a Barbie coming
(08:14):
in out of it, and this is a cake business.
And we put our ticket in a Raffle Bowl and
we won the goddamn cake, this gorgeous cake. Like that's
a side story. So we're having a great night. We
got there way too early, but it was fine, and
everyone performs. And first it's Rob Schneider. Love that guy.
(08:35):
He was probably wins like nicest, most gracious of anyone
of the whole entire night, like back on my podcast.
Not an asshole like Rob Schneider. Lovely the way he
engaged my daughter and like took the time and he
was so sweet. He was wonderful. Then David Spade, who
I was just on a TV show with Snake Oil,
who is in Britain's number one favorite movie, The Wrong Missy,
(08:58):
So let's not let's not put that to the side.
Jonathan Loweryn was there, who's in Adam Sandler's movies, And
I like that he puts his friends and family in
his movies. I think that's a nice touch. You see
the same characters in all of his movies. He was
lovely to my daughter too, and of course Adam Sandler.
So we're sitting watching the leading acts and Brynn keeps
Brynn's obsessed, She's hyper focused on behind us. Two hundred
(09:23):
people at this event that Adam Sandler's on the porch
and we're we paid all this money for the front
row tickets went effectively if you paid the lower amount,
we would have been back sitting on the stairs. And
that's kind of where Adam is just in his Hawaiian shirt,
wearing whatever he wants, just fucking around until he us
to go on. She's like, let's go back, so we're
on the stairs. And there have been times that Brynn
has wanted to meet somebody, like on the beach when
(09:44):
she doesn't have friends, or she's younger, and I've been like,
go up to that kid, and she won't no, no, no, please,
no no, and she gets scared, which is understandable because
at the time she's twelve and I can't do it
for her. And I'm like, I'll go up. She's like no, no, no,
no no. So I'm like, okay, brend there's nothing I
can do. You're gonna lose the moment. And the truth is,
in moment you have nothing ventured, nothing game gained. Say
you walk up to the ground, she is You're disgusting,
You're ugly. I don't want to be friends with you.
(10:06):
That's the worst that can happen, which is not gonna happen,
but the or you're just embarrassed of yourself because she
ignores you and you never have to see her again.
So we're on the stairs and Adam Sandler is out
on the steps on this like porch, and there's another
room inside the house that has a curtain there and
he can go there because that's like what the makeshift
(10:27):
backstage green room they made for him. So I'm standing there,
and I'm standing there with her, and I'm embarrassed because
you know when you're like that lingering weirdo fan. So
it's literally Adam Sandler, Ted Sarandos who runs Netflix. You'd
have to look it up, but I think it's like
one hundred and seventy hundred and sixty billion dollar company
like that moves markets, that's on the stock market. It's
a public company like the top ten, like Apple, Netflix, like.
(10:50):
So he's standing there. I think he said he was
really good friends with either David Spade or Adam Sandler.
So Ted's like casual on the stairs. I've talked to him.
So now I'm like embarrassed because I'm standing on this
and I'm like a lingering loser, like that person who's
like waiting to get a picture. It's not for me.
I would never do it. It is cringe what you
won't do for your fucking kids. I would take my
pants off at this party for my child. Like so
(11:12):
we're lingering, and I'm like brin, and I'm like, what
am I gonna hay Adam, I'm Bethany. I was on
snake All with David Spade. I'm a dalss reality star.
That's like sort of bless because I have a successful
podcast and like my I was on the cover of
Forbes magazine, but you still haven't heard of me because
you probably don't see anything out of the inside of
your own house or your comedian friends. And I'm such
a fucking loser drowning myself. Like so, I just don't
(11:35):
know what to do, and I'm like, I don't want
to do that. I just don't want to fucking do it.
But now I'm lingering because I'm not gonna make Brynn
who's thirteen, stand on a porch by heers. No, I
say what you say with me saying I'm like great
me standing with you is like it's cringe to these people.
I'm that loser, like Pierce bras And is here. I'm
that loser on the steps so like and peers can
walk up and just linger around. They're like a different
(11:56):
level and fucking Ted Sarandas is like moving oceans and entertainment.
I just feel like I'm in that purgatory between like
general population person who can go up to someone and
say can I get a picture? And like they don't.
They shouldn't be embarrassed. They don't talk to these people.
And there really aren't that many general population people here,
but there are many, like you know, an executive somewhere
(12:16):
to studio can walk up Adam Sandler doesn't give a fuck.
But I'm there, and I'm like semi someone. So I'm
like embarrassed in front of the people that I do know.
And the guy who runs the house that like he
said to me earlier like I will try if I can.
I'm like, oh, I'm such a fucking loser. Oh Brenda,
you don't know because she doesn't know, mom, please cause
she thinks I'm a loser, like a total loser. So like,
(12:37):
why wouldn't I go walk up to Adam Sandler and
So I'm in the middle of now and I'm standing
there and I say, Bren, you can get away with anything.
You're thirteen, you're cute, You're a door will just go up.
And I gave her a script before we've came. I
said to her, have something to fucking say. Don't stand
they're like I love yeah, like I was like, say
to him, I like, because she does like this, She's
commented on this. So I wrote her script. But it's
her script. I said, say to him, I like that
(12:58):
you have your kid. I like that you have your
family and friends and your movies. So I say, Brinn,
and so she So he walks into the back stage room.
I'm scared, I go, Brin, if it doesn't happen, this
will be the greatest lesson of your life. He walked
back in. The next thing, he may walk out and
just walk straight on stage. You're not gonna interrupt him
en route to go do his act. So I'm like nervous,
(13:19):
So I go, let me tell you something. The next
time he walks like, you gotta land you gotta stick
the landing. Stick the goddamn landing. You never get the
second chance. You don't know you had to so thank god.
He comes back up. He's standing there lingering again around
Ted Sorrandos, and I'm like the loser in the background
with my crossbody fucking cell phone in addition to my
cute outfit in purse. But I've got a cross body
(13:41):
cell phone. I look like my publicist on the red
carpet hole, Like who needs it for actual function? I'm
standing there like a loser. So he comes back out
and I'm like, go and so she walks. She walks
up to him, which is three feet from me, and
she goes says whatever, and he goes, oh, thank you.
I like that too. So then I like want my
moment just to connect. And I'm like, oh, I heard
you move to Boga. Why didn't I say, I know,
(14:02):
I'm friendly with David Spade. So Brin stuck the landing,
I shit the bed, and then later before we left,
like we were already there. So at the end of
the at the concert, Mark I fucked up because Mark
Gervitz said come back here, I'll let you know, come
back and this is like where the green room backstage
was in his house. But imagine we go back and
(14:24):
like Adam's like, yeah, I know, we did this. So
I fucked up because I should just be like, oh, yeah,
I'm dumb. I don't know who Adam Samler was. Yes,
take us both back, we'll go meet him. Who is he?
Because Brent would have gotten too double dip. I would
have been embarrassed, but I was already fucking the loser,
so I would have gone backstage and then we would
have been Then the wife probably knows me, and she
would have been nicer than Adam is. Adam is fine.
He was totally nice, but like maybe the wife somebody
(14:45):
the daughter is on TikTok, like I had a better
shot at the apple. So I fucked up again because
I'm too moral, and I said to Mark, no, we
already met him. You're fucking loser, Bethany Frankel, go backstage.
Who cares? Mark Gourvitz knows, you're already shameless. We'd gotten
another goddamn bite. So we didn't get that bite, so
we became gen pop again. Now it's the end of
the thing and I'm sitting on the stairs. Everyone's leaving
(15:07):
and going out to like where the valet is, and
I don't want to wait for an hour. So I
know Mark, so I don't feel embarrasses it with our
gigantic cake that I'm carrying in a box, I think,
like twelve to fifteen person birthday cake in a giant
cake box looks like the size of a dollhouse. And
I'm carrying around with my crossbody phone. What a loser.
(15:29):
I can never be at the level, no matter how
a big time I become, no matter how many millions
of downloads we get a month, I'm still such a
fucking loser. And I'm sitting on the stairs and I
am a thirteen year old mom. I want her to
get another bite. I fucked up the marker of its bite.
She gets to meet the all, you know. That's when
she met Rob Schneider. Leaving she gets her pictures, you know,
(15:50):
collecting the pictures like baseball cards. I have now like
five pictures of her with them. She can do a slider.
The possibilities are endless. It was an amazing night. I'm
a horror show horrific, but I don't know. We fucked
it good. But she got what she needed to get,
so she had a great time. And then during the
day we were walking, I took her to Paradise Cove
(16:13):
and we were walking in the beach looking at these spectacular
fifty million dollar houses two hundred million dollar beach where
Jay Z and Beyonce are and we're coming off the
beach and someone screams like, oh hey, and I look
over and it's so sunny, I can't really see. It's
just a man on a kayak, and so I say hi.
He looks super handsome from like the neck down. I
(16:34):
can't see his face, but I heard the voice and
I took a shot, and I thought, there's no fucking way.
Then in Malibu, I'm about to say hello to a
legend in Malibu, like seeing someone in their own habitat,
like going and just like I don't know, just seeing
like the quintessential example of someone in their own habitat.
And it's Lard Hamilton like on a kayak type thing,
(16:56):
like some advanced kayak shirtless in Malibu. I'm like, this
is fucking crazy, Like you don't what's going on. So
I say hi to him, and again back for the
thirteen year old where he says hi, and I say hi,
and I say, oh, I know Gabrielle, she was on
my podcast. And then he's coming out in the parking
lot of shirtless in his pickup truck, and he's like, oh, hey,
what was your name again? I want to tell Gabrielle
(17:16):
and I you know, Mickey Mouse, but it doesn't matter. Hey,
could I get a picture with Bryn loser? Things I
never do, things I would never do, And I'm just like,
fuck it gets out of the truck. I'm like, you
don't have to get out of the truck with your
shirtless and it's great anyway, yay, And so I take
a picture of Brynn with Lard Hamilton, the Malibu and
Hawaii Maui legend. But by the way, we've done a
(17:38):
lot of millions of dollars for Maui. So if he knew,
why the fuck didn't I say that I've I'm like
the choke master, Oh yeah, we did, like yeah, but
I said other shit, and so we stuck. We didn't
stick that landing. But I got a picture with Lard
for Bryn too,
When they say the holiday season, I think we all
think that it starts with Thanksgiving. The holiday season starts
with Halloween. And let me explain why. Because the pumpkins
are out and so you kind of can markt the
you can kind of market the pumpkins to move into Thanksgiving.
Like I still have some pumpkin to core upstairs, and
I'm just like, yeah, people eat pumpkin pie at Thanksgiving,
Like we can leave. It can't be like ghosty or
(00:34):
like scary or witchy. That's Halloween. But like just the
autumnal pumpkin things, you can mark it. So when you're
buying Halloween to Cord, just do me a favor. Don't
buy the ghosts and the witches. They don't last. Just
buy the pumpkin stuff because it can last. A pumpkin
patch can last to Thanksgiving, so like that's something that
can last. But what does happen is once Halloween happens
(00:54):
and you start taking out decorations and putting away costumes
and getting sort of sordid and like that, then you
have to start thinking about Christmas. Thanksgiving is the middle
child because you have to start thinking about Christmas. Because
here's why. Once it's November, which is the day after Halloween,
I get going with the presents. Halloween. I was with Laney,
who works with me, and we went through all the
(01:15):
gifts because once then it's my birthday November, and then
everybody's getting organized for Thanksgiving. What are you doing for Thanksgiving?
What do you cook you for Thanksgiving? Where are you
going for Thanksgiving? When are you taking the kids out
for Thanksgiving? How long is their break for Thanksgiving? What
about the travel? What about the booking? What about the tickets?
What about the busiest travel day you're what about the traffic?
You're in full Thanksgiving mode. So now you're fucked because
(01:39):
the day after Thanksgiving is Black Friday. Then you're in
like mass present by Like you can't be basic like that,
so really effectively, the minute that Halloween is over, you're
in full Hunger Games, Game of Thrones, Christmas present shopping
and so Halloween I had the presence locked. I seemed insane.
I don't care. So yesterday lady and I dipped back
(02:02):
in because we allocated gifts. But like, you can't get
fucked on the wrapping either. You don't want to leave
the wrapping until after Thanksgiving either, because then you're scrambling,
you're buying, you're wrapping, you're planning for your Christmas break.
When does that start? Some kids start early, so you
get caught in the riptide. So what we did is
November fourteenth, we started the wrapping. I do like probably
(02:23):
two two fifty gifts. I know, it's insane that counts.
That includes like bottles of wine and nice gift bags
and hangtags, et cetera. So we wrapped probably one hundred
gifts yesterday, which is for other people clustered together, gifts
that can be shipped to the same place, like an
office that has three people that I'm sending gifts, so
like those are clustered together and can be shipped. So
(02:44):
we're now already boxing up things to be shipped, so
they're just like labeled, and we can't mail them now
because otherwise I'll be known as the psychotic person that
mails Christmas gifts in November. So the second the clock
strikes December, that's when we ship them out because you're
not in full like panic shipping mode. So then next
(03:05):
week we'll probably start. Then you're wrapping the gifts for
people closest to you. Because what happens is I have
the pall gifts, the bring gifts the people that work
with me, and those become last minute gifts and then
you're scrambling two days before. So I'm just saying, be
organized about it. I have my gift wrapping room, or
have a closet. I used to have just a closet.
I used to have just a cabinet. It went from
(03:25):
a cabinet to a closet to a room. So I
have a cabinet that has gifts that I buy all
year round. I'll buy something it's on sale. I'll buy
ten of them, men's doop kits, men's wallet's key chains.
See something, see something, say something, see something by it,
see something. It's a good dlc robes. Robes are good candles,
(03:46):
but I recommend that you buy things that are lightweight
and small. While it's a great key chains are great.
Anything that's like a small leather good is good because
it's not going to take up a lot of space.
Someone's really like it and you could just put it
in a closet all year for different holidays, birthdays, Mother's Days, gifts,
(04:08):
Father's Days, whatever. Yes, I'm crazy about Christmas and I
love it and I like to give way more than
to receive. I'm the person when someone says what do
you want and I say I don't need anything or
want anything. I really mean it, Like I really mean
that I don't need anything and don't want anything. I
don't know if most people mean that. I don't think
(04:29):
they do, but I really really mean it. I don't
want anything. I want it out. But I love to
give gifts. I like make excuses. Oh, that person is
nice to me. They're outside, Okay, they drove in the
driveway from DHL. Let's give him a gift. I'm like
the Oprah of small gifts. Brenda doesn't listen to my podcast,
so I'm just gonna say, are we still doing Santa
(04:49):
Gifts this year? I still believe in Santa Claus, so
I certainly hope she does. I have Santa mailbox and
she sent him letters. So I have a kid who's
very young. What's fri Because I was going to nightclubs
at her age and she still believes in Santa Claus.
So I'm doing something right. Went with Brinn on a
(05:17):
beach walk, took her for the weekend to La friends.
Friend had a charity event with Adam Sandler, David Spade,
Rob Schneider comedy concert for a great cause, Malibu Urgent Care,
as Rob Schneider said at the beginning of his act,
because rich people definitely need good health care too, which
is hilarious. But it is actually a really, really nice clinic.
(05:40):
And it was a really nice group of people. And
it was a small, intimate event in Malibu, which reminds
me of Montalk vibes. The way people dress with the
hats and their casual and like the you know, it
was an expensive charity event, and there were like buckets
of just like beverages. You could just grab your own out,
you know, if you wanted a water or soda, and
like there was donated food from Nobu and different burgers.
(06:04):
But it had a casual vibe. And my friend called me.
His name is Mark Gervitz. He represents a lot of
comedians over the years, like legendary comedians, like he represented
Chris Farley, and he works with David Spade and all
the big big names. And so Adam Sandler and David
Spade and Rob Schneider were doing comedy acts that night
at his house for this charity. And I had called
(06:25):
Mark and said listen. My daughter is so obsessed with
Adam Sandler, like she has seen each of his thirty
something movies. I didn't know he had thirty something movies.
Multiple times. He is her number one. I mean, put
Taylor Swift to the side, anyone to the side, justin Bieber.
Adam Sandler is her number one. Goat Okay. So I
said to him if he ever does anything, and he said, well,
(06:46):
you know, because of the strike, he's not doing anything.
And then one day he said, all right, this is
the time I'm doing something in my house. And she
and I were gonna go on vacation and I was like,
fuck it, we're canceling a vacation. We're going for a
girl strip for the weekend and we're gonna see Adam
Sandler perform. And we get an email saying nobody under
eighteen because the act is definitely not for kids. And
Mark's like, it's at my house, will jam it through.
(07:09):
We go to the house. Mark's lovely. His wife is
Juliane Phillips. She is wonderful and beautiful and so nice
and they have a gorgeous home. And just incidentally, she
used to be married to Bruce Springsteen, which is not
her identity. I'm just saying I've always known that she's stunning.
And Mark has us into his home and he says,
I'm gonna get I'll try. I'm gonna try to get
(07:30):
Adam to say hello to her. So the whole night
I'm on edge. I said to Brin, there's nothing I
can guarantee we're gonna see this show, and it's gonna
be an amazing experience to begin with that nobody gets
to do in the world. But I'll do what I can.
You know, I'm not a wizard. I cannot promise the
actions of someone else. I can try. So great group
of people, interesting people like power people too, like Hi's
and Low's local Malibu, and then you know Ted Sarandos,
(07:53):
who runs Netflix is there and I think he's good
friends with Thatam. And Jack Abernathy who helps get my
podc my talk show done from Fox, and just like
Pierce Brasnan's there. But then local vendors and all this
crazy stuff. And they have this big gorgeous floral cake
and his flowers all over it and a Barbie coming
(08:14):
in out of it, and this is a cake business.
And we put our ticket in a Raffle Bowl and
we won the goddamn cake, this gorgeous cake. Like that's
a side story. So we're having a great night. We
got there way too early, but it was fine, and
everyone performs. And first it's Rob Schneider. Love that guy.
(08:35):
He was probably wins like nicest, most gracious of anyone
of the whole entire night, like back on my podcast.
Not an asshole like Rob Schneider. Lovely the way he
engaged my daughter and like took the time and he
was so sweet. He was wonderful. Then David Spade, who
I was just on a TV show with Snake Oil,
who is in Britain's number one favorite movie, The Wrong Missy,
(08:58):
So let's not let's not put that to the side.
Jonathan Loweryn was there, who's in Adam Sandler's movies, And
I like that he puts his friends and family in
his movies. I think that's a nice touch. You see
the same characters in all of his movies. He was
lovely to my daughter too, and of course Adam Sandler.
So we're sitting watching the leading acts and Brynn keeps
Brynn's obsessed, She's hyper focused on behind us. Two hundred
(09:23):
people at this event that Adam Sandler's on the porch
and we're we paid all this money for the front
row tickets went effectively if you paid the lower amount,
we would have been back sitting on the stairs. And
that's kind of where Adam is just in his Hawaiian shirt,
wearing whatever he wants, just fucking around until he us
to go on. She's like, let's go back, so we're
on the stairs. And there have been times that Brynn
has wanted to meet somebody, like on the beach when
(09:44):
she doesn't have friends, or she's younger, and I've been like,
go up to that kid, and she won't no, no, no, please,
no no, and she gets scared, which is understandable because
at the time she's twelve and I can't do it
for her. And I'm like, I'll go up. She's like no, no, no,
no no. So I'm like, okay, brend there's nothing I
can do. You're gonna lose the moment. And the truth is,
in moment you have nothing ventured, nothing game gained. Say
you walk up to the ground, she is You're disgusting,
You're ugly. I don't want to be friends with you.
(10:06):
That's the worst that can happen, which is not gonna happen,
but the or you're just embarrassed of yourself because she
ignores you and you never have to see her again.
So we're on the stairs and Adam Sandler is out
on the steps on this like porch, and there's another
room inside the house that has a curtain there and
he can go there because that's like what the makeshift
(10:27):
backstage green room they made for him. So I'm standing there,
and I'm standing there with her, and I'm embarrassed because
you know when you're like that lingering weirdo fan. So
it's literally Adam Sandler, Ted Sarandos who runs Netflix. You'd
have to look it up, but I think it's like
one hundred and seventy hundred and sixty billion dollar company
like that moves markets, that's on the stock market. It's
a public company like the top ten, like Apple, Netflix, like.
(10:50):
So he's standing there. I think he said he was
really good friends with either David Spade or Adam Sandler.
So Ted's like casual on the stairs. I've talked to him.
So now I'm like embarrassed because I'm standing on this
and I'm like a lingering loser, like that person who's
like waiting to get a picture. It's not for me.
I would never do it. It is cringe what you
won't do for your fucking kids. I would take my
pants off at this party for my child. Like so
(11:12):
we're lingering, and I'm like brin, and I'm like, what
am I gonna hay Adam, I'm Bethany. I was on
snake All with David Spade. I'm a dalss reality star.
That's like sort of bless because I have a successful
podcast and like my I was on the cover of
Forbes magazine, but you still haven't heard of me because
you probably don't see anything out of the inside of
your own house or your comedian friends. And I'm such
a fucking loser drowning myself. Like so, I just don't
(11:35):
know what to do, and I'm like, I don't want
to do that. I just don't want to fucking do it.
But now I'm lingering because I'm not gonna make Brynn
who's thirteen, stand on a porch by heers. No, I
say what you say with me saying I'm like great
me standing with you is like it's cringe to these people.
I'm that loser, like Pierce bras And is here. I'm
that loser on the steps so like and peers can
walk up and just linger around. They're like a different
(11:56):
level and fucking Ted Sarandas is like moving oceans and entertainment.
I just feel like I'm in that purgatory between like
general population person who can go up to someone and
say can I get a picture? And like they don't.
They shouldn't be embarrassed. They don't talk to these people.
And there really aren't that many general population people here,
but there are many, like you know, an executive somewhere
(12:16):
to studio can walk up Adam Sandler doesn't give a fuck.
But I'm there, and I'm like semi someone. So I'm
like embarrassed in front of the people that I do know.
And the guy who runs the house that like he
said to me earlier like I will try if I can.
I'm like, oh, I'm such a fucking loser. Oh Brenda,
you don't know because she doesn't know, mom, please cause
she thinks I'm a loser, like a total loser. So like,
(12:37):
why wouldn't I go walk up to Adam Sandler and
So I'm in the middle of now and I'm standing
there and I say, Bren, you can get away with anything.
You're thirteen, you're cute, You're a door will just go up.
And I gave her a script before we've came. I
said to her, have something to fucking say. Don't stand
they're like I love yeah, like I was like, say
to him, I like, because she does like this, She's
commented on this. So I wrote her script. But it's
her script. I said, say to him, I like that
(12:58):
you have your kid. I like that you have your
family and friends and your movies. So I say, Brinn,
and so she So he walks into the back stage room.
I'm scared, I go, Brin, if it doesn't happen, this
will be the greatest lesson of your life. He walked
back in. The next thing, he may walk out and
just walk straight on stage. You're not gonna interrupt him
en route to go do his act. So I'm like nervous,
(13:19):
So I go, let me tell you something. The next
time he walks like, you gotta land you gotta stick
the landing. Stick the goddamn landing. You never get the
second chance. You don't know you had to so thank god.
He comes back up. He's standing there lingering again around
Ted Sorrandos, and I'm like the loser in the background
with my crossbody fucking cell phone in addition to my
cute outfit in purse. But I've got a cross body
(13:41):
cell phone. I look like my publicist on the red
carpet hole, Like who needs it for actual function? I'm
standing there like a loser. So he comes back out
and I'm like, go and so she walks. She walks
up to him, which is three feet from me, and
she goes says whatever, and he goes, oh, thank you.
I like that too. So then I like want my
moment just to connect. And I'm like, oh, I heard
you move to Boga. Why didn't I say, I know,
(14:02):
I'm friendly with David Spade. So Brin stuck the landing,
I shit the bed, and then later before we left,
like we were already there. So at the end of
the at the concert, Mark I fucked up because Mark
Gervitz said come back here, I'll let you know, come
back and this is like where the green room backstage
was in his house. But imagine we go back and
(14:24):
like Adam's like, yeah, I know, we did this. So
I fucked up because I should just be like, oh, yeah,
I'm dumb. I don't know who Adam Samler was. Yes,
take us both back, we'll go meet him. Who is he?
Because Brent would have gotten too double dip. I would
have been embarrassed, but I was already fucking the loser,
so I would have gone backstage and then we would
have been Then the wife probably knows me, and she
would have been nicer than Adam is. Adam is fine.
He was totally nice, but like maybe the wife somebody
(14:45):
the daughter is on TikTok, like I had a better
shot at the apple. So I fucked up again because
I'm too moral, and I said to Mark, no, we
already met him. You're fucking loser, Bethany Frankel, go backstage.
Who cares? Mark Gourvitz knows, you're already shameless. We'd gotten
another goddamn bite. So we didn't get that bite, so
we became gen pop again. Now it's the end of
the thing and I'm sitting on the stairs. Everyone's leaving
(15:07):
and going out to like where the valet is, and
I don't want to wait for an hour. So I
know Mark, so I don't feel embarrasses it with our
gigantic cake that I'm carrying in a box, I think,
like twelve to fifteen person birthday cake in a giant
cake box looks like the size of a dollhouse. And
I'm carrying around with my crossbody phone. What a loser.
(15:29):
I can never be at the level, no matter how
a big time I become, no matter how many millions
of downloads we get a month, I'm still such a
fucking loser. And I'm sitting on the stairs and I
am a thirteen year old mom. I want her to
get another bite. I fucked up the marker of its bite.
She gets to meet the all, you know. That's when
she met Rob Schneider. Leaving she gets her pictures, you know,
(15:50):
collecting the pictures like baseball cards. I have now like
five pictures of her with them. She can do a slider.
The possibilities are endless. It was an amazing night. I'm
a horror show horrific, but I don't know. We fucked
it good. But she got what she needed to get,
so she had a great time. And then during the
day we were walking, I took her to Paradise Cove
(16:13):
and we were walking in the beach looking at these spectacular
fifty million dollar houses two hundred million dollar beach where
Jay Z and Beyonce are and we're coming off the
beach and someone screams like, oh hey, and I look
over and it's so sunny, I can't really see. It's
just a man on a kayak, and so I say hi.
He looks super handsome from like the neck down. I
(16:34):
can't see his face, but I heard the voice and
I took a shot, and I thought, there's no fucking way.
Then in Malibu, I'm about to say hello to a
legend in Malibu, like seeing someone in their own habitat,
like going and just like I don't know, just seeing
like the quintessential example of someone in their own habitat.
And it's Lard Hamilton like on a kayak type thing,
(16:56):
like some advanced kayak shirtless in Malibu. I'm like, this
is fucking crazy, Like you don't what's going on. So
I say hi to him, and again back for the
thirteen year old where he says hi, and I say hi,
and I say, oh, I know Gabrielle, she was on
my podcast. And then he's coming out in the parking
lot of shirtless in his pickup truck, and he's like, oh, hey,
what was your name again? I want to tell Gabrielle
(17:16):
and I you know, Mickey Mouse, but it doesn't matter. Hey,
could I get a picture with Bryn loser? Things I
never do, things I would never do, And I'm just like,
fuck it gets out of the truck. I'm like, you
don't have to get out of the truck with your
shirtless and it's great anyway, yay, And so I take
a picture of Brynn with Lard Hamilton, the Malibu and
Hawaii Maui legend. But by the way, we've done a
(17:38):
lot of millions of dollars for Maui. So if he knew,
why the fuck didn't I say that I've I'm like
the choke master, Oh yeah, we did, like yeah, but
I said other shit, and so we stuck. We didn't
stick that landing. But I got a picture with Lard
for Bryn too,
Host
Bethenny Frankel
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