Gringo's Guide To: Creating Your Limitless Life w/ Dr. Esther Zeledón

Dramos is joined by auhtor of the book "Creating Your Limitless Life", Dr. Esther Zeledón, to discuss overcoming obstacles, breaking free of limitations, finding your unique gift, creating a blueprint for your success and more!

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:05):
I love me talking about talk.

Speaker 2 (00:08):
There we go, he said, he live in Life as
a Ringo, where you question when you fit in.

Speaker 1 (00:14):
Every time you mingle, they say you do. This would
not that my raps.

Speaker 3 (00:20):
Life. Ingo.

Speaker 4 (00:22):
Yes, hello, and welcome to another episode of Life as
a Gringo. I am dramas of course, and I am really,
really really excited to bring today's show to you.

Speaker 2 (00:33):
I have an incredible guest hopping on here. It's been
months in the making of having her on the show.
Doctor Esther Ze is going to be hopping on here.
She has this incredible book called Creating Your Limitless Life,
and now we just had a really amazing conversation. Again,
it was one of those ones that took a few
months for us to coordinate schedule wise. I think I'm

(00:53):
probably the blame for that, with just crazy, crazy summer
that's been happening thus far. But I'm glad we got
to finally, you know, have her here on the podcast.
And I think i'd actually I had referenced her from
an article I think in one of our Thursday Trends episodes,
and from there kind of sort of following her and

(01:13):
following the book that she had put out, reading the book,
I should say, and I.

Speaker 1 (01:18):
Was definitely this is one of those interviews.

Speaker 2 (01:21):
And I'll keep this sort of preface to the interview
short so we can get into it. But it was
one of those ones where I was like, man, I am,
I am so fucking grateful to have a platform that
allows me to connect with really incredible people and to
sort of bounce I don't bounce ideas off of but
also just get an insight into where their their mind works.

(01:47):
And it was one of those ones where I sort
of walked away like, you know, it was almost you know,
I also felt like I should have should have paid
her for for some of the insight I feel like
I got from the conversation and just some of the
clarity I got on myself and the way my own
mind works and kind of a great sort of pathway

(02:07):
forward of where my strengths lie. And I just think
the way that she is able to break down and
I think allow you to conceptualize where your personal strengths lie,
the way that your mind uniquely works, which then gives
you a competitive advantage in this life, I think is
a beautiful concept. And yeah, I'll kind of leave it

(02:30):
at that, but I'm really excited about this conversation, and
for me, I definitely walked away sort of inspired and
with a bit of clarity that I didn't.

Speaker 1 (02:38):
Have prior to that.

Speaker 2 (02:39):
So excited to bring it to you, and we'll do
it via our Mihante segment. My guest today man is
an incredible keynote speaker. She's also the best selling author

(03:00):
of the book Creating Your Limitless Life, Doctor Sasadong.

Speaker 1 (03:04):
How you failing.

Speaker 3 (03:06):
I'm feeling awesome, so happy to be here.

Speaker 2 (03:08):
Yes, yes, me too. This is a long time in
the making. We were talking about this before we started recording.
Unfortunately I missed you and your your husband, you guys
were here in New Jersey and we had to to reschedule.

Speaker 1 (03:20):
So I'm glad we were able to make this work
because I've.

Speaker 2 (03:23):
Been literally just like in indulging in your work for
the better part of this year, I feel like, so
it's nice to actually finally be able to sit.

Speaker 1 (03:31):
Down with you as planned.

Speaker 3 (03:32):
Yeah, this is awesome.

Speaker 2 (03:34):
So I mean, let's let's let's kind of just dive
right into the book, which I think is how I
kind of came across you, and you know, you have
a lot of really inspiring stories of overcoming adversity in
the book, right, and that that's sort of the the

(03:55):
lens by which you're kind of teaching these lessons, right,
is your own sort of struggles that you've gone through,
and you touch on different challenging moments throughout the course
of your life.

Speaker 1 (04:03):
I mean, from your own.

Speaker 2 (04:05):
Health struggles as a as a kid, you know, financial
struggles that your parents went through. And I guess you know,
for the starting place, since that's sort of the base
that you decided to use as your launching point, why
do you think reflection on our struggles is such an
important thing or an important key for us to utilize

(04:27):
to then sort of turn into you know, the thing
that we can pull from to gain our power if
you will.

Speaker 3 (04:33):
Yeah, yeah, No, that's a really good question. And I
think there's I have like a multiple angles for that answer.

Speaker 1 (04:39):
Sure.

Speaker 3 (04:40):
One is I'm really focus on the latinas struggle. And
because I think like as a culture, we like to
keep things in our families. Oh, we don't talk about
money outside the house. We don't don't tell them that
we're going through this, don't tell So there's a lot

(05:01):
of that in the culture. So one is even though
I have seen you know, other books that talk about
struggle from other different you know, cultures, whatever, I haven't
seen as many Latinas write about this. And I think
that's one like you can't you can't. You need to
have that representation out there and a person that put

(05:21):
is willing to put it all out there, and it's scary.
It was really scary for me to write all this.
I also, like I think I wrote in the book,
I had to lead it several sections and then put
them back in and I said, okay, I let myself
free and put it all in. But it was a
lot from that, like culture shocked, Like I even had
to have conversations with my family it is not to
hurt you, this is to help others. So I think
that's the first thing is like move. We need to

(05:42):
shift as a culture to be more open and supporting
and having these conversations not just asking people like hey
have you gained way, who's your boyfriend, girlfriend, did you
get promotion? Your money, and more towards like how can
I support you? What are you going through? And without
feeling shame around it. So so that was one thing
that's why it's really important to share that. I think

(06:04):
the second thing is the other angle I have, is
that from the outside, right, I was this high achiever,
right like I did all the things that I said
I would do. I had all the accolades, right, and
all the celebration moments in my life were from these accolades.
But there's a lot of suffering that happens in silence
that people didn't see, right. And it was even I

(06:26):
talked about being bullied that no one even knew I
was going through because you feel this burden that I
have to be the strong one. Everyone looks up to me.
If I share that, then I'm letting them down. So
another really important part of why I focus so much
on that is we don't have to suffer in silence.

(06:46):
You know that these dichotomies exist. Yes, the same day
that you're getting awards, it's the same day that you
have naysayers and people telling this. And we see this
on the media reality where we see like you know,
we see this with so things that they have these
athletes and then people are tearing them down at the
same time, but we don't talk about what that does

(07:07):
to the human being those two things, and people only see, oh, well,
that person has nothing to complain about because they got
all their life figured out. But you know what, that
person's also being teared down in that same day and
they are human, and so it was really important to
share that there is a human element. And that's if
the reader it's twofold, if the reader is that high achiever,
but it's also for the reader who isn't to have

(07:29):
empathy and compassion towards that person. Right, it's not no,
they have messy lives as well. They suffer through the
same things you do, and it's to have that openness
compassion that they also need support because a lot of
times high achievers are just left there like, oh, well
they don't need it because they're not suffering, so I'm

(07:50):
not going to even reach out to them. And that's
where it creates that loneliness. And so that's we see
that in the news where we're like, wait, why did
that person commit suicide or why did that person? You know,
we've seen it like with these very talented people. A
lot of times it's because they're lonely, right, like no
one's there to support them, and people think that they
don't need support. So as I say, my answer is

(08:12):
very it's much of multiple angles because I think we
don't share enough of that from that point of view,
and so culturally, and then from the person who I
could talk about from my own experience of being that
person with accolades, this is the things I needed. And
then also by opening that space that if you're authentic

(08:32):
and vulnerable and willing to do it how it's liberating.
And so I have a lot of people who reach
out to me from the book. They're like, I can't believe.
They're like, you said that, you actually shared that out loud.
I'm like yes, and they're like, well, thank you for that.
But you know, I don't know if I would have
the guts too, but I'm so glad you did. But
what I want to do is I want you to
have those those guts to share that, right. I want

(08:53):
you to normalize it so we can also be nicer
as a society to each other, right, and create this
social change that's needed. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (09:03):
No, absolutely, I mean you're hitting on so many different things.

Speaker 2 (09:06):
One thing that really stuck out to me about what
you just said is the loneliness factor, right, because I
think this isn't what this isn't spoken about quite enough.
When we talk about personal development and the topic of authenticity,
it's all sort of painted through or viewed through like
these rose covered glasses, right, like, you know, oh, it's
so liberating to be yourself, and it is, but also

(09:28):
to your point, it's incredibly lonely and isolating because I
think oftentimes living truly authentically means that a lot of
people are no longer going to fit into sort of
the neat little box that they once would have if
you're just kind of constantly conforming, right, And I think
you know that is a part.

Speaker 1 (09:45):
Of the struggle or being a high achiever.

Speaker 2 (09:47):
I know for me personally, oftentimes I have a hard
time relating to those around me who sort of aren't
on that same exact wavelength, right. And quite frankly, I
think majority of people aren't.

Speaker 1 (09:58):
On that wavelength, right.

Speaker 2 (10:00):
A lot of people are conforming or settling, or or
sort of just taking what life gives them, revn demanding
for more, And it's an incredibly lonely journey to sort
of feel like you're the only person that you know,
especially if you are a product of like an immigrant family,
where a lot of times the narrative is just be happy,
that we're not going through the struggles of like your
family who are back home doing that, right, you know,

(10:21):
you have nothing to complain about. I came here with
a dollar in my pocket type of you know, rhetoric
and things like that. And and I think it's it's
almost disorienting to a degree.

Speaker 1 (10:31):
Uh.

Speaker 2 (10:31):
And and I guess how I'm assuming you probably can
relate to that in some way. I mean, how do
you kind of talk to anybody who's feeling very isolated
by the fact that they're wanting more out of life
and it seems like everybody else is just fine with
you know, the scraps that the world is giving them.

Speaker 3 (10:49):
Yeah, And the thing is, it's first, it's first telling
them that the other people are not fine. Actually, and
that's why we have to do this, right, It's because
they they don't see it. You can't you can't be
what you can't see and and so they just don't
see it. And that's why it's having empathy also at
first for your naysayers, right, And I talk about salve
because sometimes that person who who may not understand you

(11:11):
now will be your supporter later. And it may be
that they're they're on their own journey or struggling with
those own cultural and family narratives that they're given, like
you know, like we grew up with like no diagas
lucies and all that stuff, right, and so you you
still thinking about those like wait, but I can't have that,
And so they're still stuck in that, right and you're

(11:32):
just you're in a different part in your journey. It
doesn't mean they won't come around later, but they're not
there right now. And so at first, I g've done
that lens. It's not that it's not like black. It's
not like black or white, like Okay, they're not for me,
they're gone. No, it's it's people need time and have
empathy for their time. Doesn't mean that you have to
take their abuse or negativity or any of that. It's
just park it. But and but I also think that

(11:54):
it's also like if you feel that calling, right, and
that's why I talk about what's your purpose? Right, If
you feel that it is more, you have to all
away and it is it is lonely at first, because
you have to have that courage to be that first
one in your circle. But that's what's so important now,
especially in this digital world. There you don't have to
be alone. And I think that's a lot of part
of my reason why I share this book and I

(12:15):
share these things because the more we share our stories
and the more we actually communicate, that's when the loneliness
goes away, because then we find people around us who
can relate, and then we start opening ourselves to people
being like, oh, actually I know someone who can connect you,
like if you're like I want to be sought out
and I want to build this thing. Oh actually I
might know someone or I might connect you to this one.

(12:37):
And then there's there's a digital world. Like my first
community and I found actually was in Australia, and I
found that online because it was around my immediate circle.
I didn't find I couldn't find people around me, and
I had just like you know, left my job that
we're into like creating global movements or doing things like that.
And this is even later in life. I said, Okay,

(12:58):
I'm going to go online and find like a women's
growth minded entrepreneurship group, and I found one in Australia
and then and then later of course, by being with them,
then I started to see around me and then I
started to find it near me, And sometimes it's first
finding a group for then you to be open because
it probably does exist around you, just not in your

(13:21):
immediate circle. And as human beings were all longing for community,
and sometimes a lot of people don't even share their
aspirations and they might even have a similar aspiration to
you that you might not even know about, and so
stuff like the first step, it's like really being like,
what is my calling? Realizing that yes, some people might

(13:42):
not support you right now, but doesn't mean they won't later.
And then third, where can I find champions to go
through this difficult time right now that are going to
support me at least in this initial step, And then
it can snowball from there.

Speaker 1 (13:56):
All right, I'm gonna pop in here real quick.

Speaker 2 (13:57):
We'll take a pause, we'll take a quick break, and
then will be right back.

Speaker 1 (14:04):
All right, we are back, and kind.

Speaker 2 (14:06):
Of going back to the original question I post to
you about the challenges that you face in your life.
I think what I've begun to recognize is, you know,
those those challenges or negative moments or the naysairs or
whatever it may be, they oftentimes at the beginning are
great fuel for you to sort of want to prove
people wrong. Right, And then I think you get to

(14:28):
a point where it just becomes really dark and convoluted
of like you're performing to prove people wrong that don't
even exist anymore, basically right, And what I've begun, as
I've done the self work for me, what I begin
to struggle with is if I'm not operating from a
place of using those negative moments as like my fuel,
then what is my fuel now? Basically right, It's almost

(14:51):
like I'm getting too comfortable, my life is almost too good.

Speaker 1 (14:53):
How do I stay motivated at this point? Right?

Speaker 2 (14:55):
And then that becomes depressing in itself, where it's like
I'm no longer the person I used to be, Right,
I don't have that same struggle that's shame drive to
push past the struggle.

Speaker 1 (15:03):
So I'm curious for you how you sort.

Speaker 2 (15:06):
Of use those moments, you know, to maybe give you
fuel but not be overtaken by them, or how to
find new ways of keeping yourself motivated and pushing you know,
yourself beyond the limits that you already know.

Speaker 3 (15:18):
No, no, definitely, And there is that line right like
it's it's not to be in victim land, it's not
to play martyrship, right, And I definitely hope that with
the book, it's to share the struggle. But it's more
like that the journey is not just what we see
on movies and TV like oh I got these accolades
and that was it, right, No, it's it's a struggle.

(15:39):
There's ups and downs, you doubt yourself, right, and that's
the message. And it's also for you to reflect on,
look how far I've come? Right, So when you look
and when I think about people looking back on their
past struggles, it's more like the things you're overcome and
you're going to keep overcoming, and the things that helped
you are going to keep helping you. And it's more
of a study of your past. What did you overcome,
how did you do it, and how instead of using

(16:00):
that in crisis, can I use that in my every
day to keep going? Right? So like seeing it from
that that lens. But then in the future, like what
you're saying, it's like what keeps and what kept me
motivated then and what keeps me motivated now is what
is that feeling an impact that you want to create? Right,
and what's that vision? And that is what the next

(16:21):
step is, right, that's the motivator. It's not it's like
you said, it's not taking your past and going, oh,
I'm trying to prove it, to prove them wrong, where
I'm angry, but it's more like, Okay, I'm learning from that,
and now how do I continue building that legacy I
want to leave behind, the impact I want to make.
What's that feeling I want to have in five ten, fifteen,

(16:43):
twenty years and dreaming big? Right, there's like there's so
many like I do these sometimes these vision words with
students and even with parents, and sometimes they only think
about the next year, like oh, this next year, I
want to do this, and I'm like, but what about
in five ten? Because you got to be clear. You've
got to have that vision of what you you got

(17:03):
to know what you want to have it. And if
you're not clear on what you're trying and that impact
and that feeling you want to create that, then you
won't make it there because then you're not going You're
not going in any direction, right, You're just going on
this day to day grind or like one step at
a time. So that next step is like really sitting
down and going Okay, if I were to close my

(17:24):
eyes in twenty years, what's the impact I want to
make in this world? And what's that feeling I want
to have? And then work backwards what does that look
like in fifteen? Was I look like in ten? Was
I look like in five? And that also separates, Like
I have my book Chasing the American Dream cross out
because I was one that thought the American Dream was
my purpose but it wasn't right. That was something society

(17:48):
placed on me. But what is? And I also took
it in right, But it's it's more about separating that.
When you think about feeling an impact, you're separating yourself
from that those check marks of society gives and like
what's really in your intuition that you want to create?
And when you really think about it. That's why my
work book and the first exercise my book is like

(18:10):
writing your obituary and rewriting it because in those moments,
you see you're not writing there your accolades or you know,
the car you bought, or how you're writing there, How
did you impact people? And what is that feeling that
you're leaving on this earth? Right? And so when you
do it from that lens, you realize way am I really, folks,

(18:32):
Have I really been focusing on the right things and
that uncomfortableness you feel when you write it you already
have there when you're rewriting it. What's that gap from
A to B that you want to create? And that
is the motivational factor? And how can I bring in
my how to and how I solve problems every day
to this world to create that vision for myself?

Speaker 1 (18:52):
Yeah? No, no, absolutely.

Speaker 2 (18:54):
I love that you kind of let into the idea
of impact as well, right, because I think I'd love
to hear your because I get a lot of shit
for this because my take is, like, you know, you
have like an artist. Let's take a bad bunny or
something like that, right, And obviously brilliant musician, brilliant artists
and all these things. And to his credit, he's also

(19:16):
dabbled in being somebody who's outspoken about politics and things
of that nature. But my argument is always when somebody
has a platform, been gifted a platform like that one,
if we are to look back on their life and
at the end of the day, they were gifted that
and they drove around Bugattis and were hanging out with
Kardashians all the time, and partying and all these things,

(19:38):
and they gave us great music, but I would look
at it personally and say that falls short for what
I think that life could have been essentially right and
a lot.

Speaker 1 (19:47):
And the counter argument to that is, well, they're an artist.
That that's what they do.

Speaker 2 (19:51):
They create art, right, They're not supposed to be somebody
speaking out and doing all these things. I'd love to
kind of hear your take as somebody who is you know,
impact driven right in the things that you do and
maybe the social responsibility that you think we all do
or don't carry.

Speaker 3 (20:08):
Yeah, So I my answer to that is every person's
legacy is different, right, and every every person's how too
is different, so like and we could even do it here.
So like for me, my how to is like I
love to, Like my first step in solving any promise,
I listen first, and then I bring people together, you know,

(20:29):
to to think about their the purpose, mission, vision, what
is it for them? And then I help them make
it happen. Right, And that's what I do in every
single realm of my life, right, So that that is
my how to I bring every day. But my legacy
I want to leave is yes, I want to create
this global movement and I want to change the cultural
you know, and social narrative and be outspoken about it.

(20:51):
But there's other people that their legacy is like they
might say, my how to and how I impact is
I write, you know, I first, right, and then I
put emotion. Maybe you know. His could be that he
brings emotion through words and lyrics, right, and his has
and his legacy is impacting one person at a time,
and it's not on a global scale. And so for me,

(21:12):
it's that there is no right or wrong. It's are
you though? The question is are you bringing your how
to every day in the world how you want to
or are you holding yourself back? Right? So if I
were to speak to him and he said, well, I
would love to be able to have words, you know,
like be use my social platform and words, then my

(21:34):
question would be like, what's holding you back? Is it
the hyper scrutiny from from the public. Is it that
you can't handle that, is that you don't have resilience
to that? Right? There, there could be a lot of
different answers, but it's more importantly does are you leaving
the legacy you want to leave and impact how you
want to? To leave it, or are you because of
society because of other things only you know, then you're

(21:55):
not really being one hundred percent authentic, right, So for me,
it's more that is ever everyone having the opportunity and
really bringing their how to impact the way the way
they want to bring it, or are you doing it
have to play it safe, you know, because of like
fear and all these other things. Because I really feel
like if we all are living it how we want

(22:17):
to freely, however that is, whether it's through global platforms,
whether through words, whether it's just just through one on
one conversations, then we can actually you know, all help
the world together because we need all the different We
need people who are outspoken, but we also need the
people who are one on one. We need, we need poets,

(22:37):
we need we need all of it. But is but
are you What we don't need is people holding themselves
back because fear of criticism, because they're comparing themselves to
other people, or because of limiting beliefs, or because they're
family or because their gender. Right, that's the stuff we
don't don't need. But I do believe, like inherently like

(22:59):
the particularly that people we were as and when I
do this with kids. We all wanted to change the
world at some point in our lives, and it's it's
what changes is were we silenced or not? And then
what did we do with that silence? Some of us
are we rebel against that and some of the russ
gets silenced and then we have a slow death from that,

(23:22):
and and I believe that and so and I also
believe like everything that happens after people white people join games,
why terrorism, all that stuff is from the lack of
ability to live out what you wanted to right, and
then people we need we need community, We need people,
so we find a way to bring it to whatever
space we need to bring in. So I know it
was kind of convoluted answer, but I mean, without speaking

(23:42):
to bad Bunny, I don't know people.

Speaker 2 (23:44):
But sure, no, no, I think that's a fair, fair,
a fair take on it. When you you said slow death,
that really like punctured something in me, you know, And
I think that's such a poignant way to put it.
And to your point about out a lot of talented
or successful people being unhappier taking their own lives how

(24:05):
we see it, you know, entertainers and things of that nature,
and even people successful in the world of business entrepreneurs,
and these people that begin to like cross the line
of just lack of humanity completely. To your point, I
think it's kind of ironic and I don't know if
it's scary would even be the word. How they can
be so fearless in one aspect of their life, but

(24:27):
be so fearful of just like public shame of being
who they are essentially, right, they have the they have
the ability to push past, like you know, their comfort
zone and take risks to start a business or to
go after their dreams. But then they can't like get
over themselves and truly just you know, give themselves authentically
to the world, and as a result, they numb themselves

(24:48):
in all these different areas. And I just find that
to be sort of endlessly fascinating and interesting, I guess,
in just the complexity of us as human beings.

Speaker 3 (24:59):
Yeah. Absolutely, But it also comes down to what you're
rewarded for, right, I mean I even like I remember,
you know, even when I left my job to do
what I do now. Right, if people are like, what
do you mean, are you crazy? Like you have what
people covet or why do you want to pivot? Or
you know, you have everything that everyone else wants, but
it wasn't once I wanted and was it when it's

(25:20):
in alignment with me, it's what I was rewarded for, right,
And it's not that I wasn't giving impacts there, it's
that it wasn't the impact that my vision was right
and it could and it's the same thing, but I
was still super scared. And people would be like, but
you're fearless at work. But it's but that I in
my mind, that was something I felt like I could

(25:40):
control and it was certain. I knew that I couldn't
fail at that. So it's when you have to push
into something that you haven't given yourself freedom to explore
and whatever that is right, So that's successful entrepreneur could
be pushing into something different and they're scared of the
other thing is certain for me and if I push here,

(26:01):
I can lose everything I built. Right, These are all
these limiting beliefs that are ingrained in us. But it's
not one or the other. Right, you can pivot slowly
and not feel right, but that's part of that self work,
a self work that we have to do in that
personal development. Right, But that's why for us it may
not make sense, but for them it's like, oh no,
but that's like a huge pivot and people know me

(26:21):
as this, and then what's going to happen to my reputation?
What am I going to let people down? Right? And
that's when all that comes into it. And then you know,
everyone else is telling you that it's a mistake, and
so you're trying to fight those voices and that voice
inside of you.

Speaker 2 (26:38):
Yeah, I mean, it's the noise, right. I saw a
quote that you had on your Instagram. You said, working
hard isn't the challenge? Silencing the noise and tuning into
your intuition is, And that again, is one of those
ones that kind of stops you in your your tracks,
you know, because to your point, it's easy to kind
of put your head down and do the hard work.
It's it's when the chatter of the outside world begins

(27:01):
to come into play that you start doubting yourself or
you begin to deviate from your path, right.

Speaker 1 (27:06):
You know, they're even for me.

Speaker 2 (27:07):
You know, I started mostly in the world of like entertainment,
and when I go to events sometimes and I see
former co workers, you know, entertaining the masters and even
if it's like a superficial conversation that I've zero interest in,
there's still that part of me that's like, I could
have been that person? Why didn't I go down that
route of being you know, the entertainer or whatever it is,
you know, And I have to then have that internal

(27:28):
dialogue of checking myself of like, but you wanted something
more so that that's why you're not walking down that path, right,
regardless of if you could have.

Speaker 1 (27:36):
Done it, you know or not.

Speaker 2 (27:38):
But it's that noise is the hardest thing, and I
think to get over to your point, and at times
it makes you just completely deviate and then like you
waste months going down the wrong.

Speaker 1 (27:46):
Path and you just have to kind of circle back around.

Speaker 2 (27:49):
And I'm just curious sort of for you, what has
has maybe been the the thing that helps you maybe
tune out some of that noise or I guess we're
also talking about some of the ego that is just
inside of all of us, right, and you know, trying
to stay in line with your purpose and not get
swept up in the next like sexy, bright light thing
that is thrown in front of you.

Speaker 3 (28:11):
Yeah, no, And it's hard, right because it's the shiny brights.
I think they call it a shiny brighte syndrome, right,
and the objects and stuff. Right, you're like, oh, that
looks cool. That looks cool, and and for me it's
like I I mean, it's there's different approaches, right, for
different people. For me it works is breath work, and
for other people it may be hypnotherapy, therapy, taking a walk. Right.

(28:32):
I always say that self care, like, I know people
use that, we're very fluffy. It's I think it's very individualized, right,
It's very like what what has helped you before and
what kind of tools you use, And that's different forever.
And there's like sixty something types of self care, and
there's you know, there's there's checklists you can look at.
But for me, breath work is one because I'm since
I am that high cheaper persona, my mind's always on

(28:55):
and I used to try I had tried yoga. Yoga
didn't work for me. I had tried meditation, so you
gotta try tofferent things. But breathwork, because it's active, it helps.
It helps me focus just on the breath. So for
people who don't know a breath work, right, you're doing
like rapid breathing and you're putting a lot of oxygen
in your system. And what that's nice is that it
for me, it helps like I don't it Actually, I

(29:17):
goes straight into my visions and into my intuition of
what I want to create, right, And you're guided, You're like, okay,
think about what you want to create, what you want
to release, and so you're focused on one thing and
that helps me. Then it comes very clear to me
in those sessions over an hour of where should I go?
What should I do? Which is inside of me, but
it's without all that noise, right, and so it helps

(29:38):
me focus. And I think that's what I recommend people
to find that one tool. It may not be breathwork,
it may be something else, But where is it that
you feel that you can actually tune out and really
speak to yourself and what is it that you want
without judgment, without criticism, with unlimited resources? And maybe it's

(29:59):
just even that prompt, like if you didn't have any
of those barriers, what would you do you do? Even
just asking yourself that like some people in my past,
actually planes used to be that space for me. You know,
there's no distraction my monoplane, I look outside the window,
I can like think about that more clearly. And so
that's the firstep. It was like, you got to talk
to yourself. What is it if you had if you

(30:21):
didn't worry about any of that stuff, what would you do?
And that's what I have to do that constantly now
because there's there's tons of opportunities and there's tons of
different things I can do, and sure all of them
could be cool, but which one is going to lead
me to that feeling an impact that I want even five, ten,
fifteen years from now, which is aligned with me? And

(30:43):
then like really separate. Is that really aligned with that vision?
Or am I doing it because exactly what you're saying,
like the ego part, because I want more. I want
to speak to my inner child, that healing, you know
what I mean, because I want that external validation all
these things that are from my past trauma. Right, So
am I trying to speak to that child? Or am

(31:03):
I really trying to speak to the future. I want
to build And we have to stop every time like
we do that and do that, and it's really hard,
I think, even culturally because we're taught especially like and
I'm sticking from a woman's point of view. But I
know this happens to men too, right. It's like, Hey,
we're told you just got to help, you know, you
just have to fix and we're told to respond right away,

(31:25):
And like I encourage folks, you do not have to
respond same day. Even taking one day to think about
that request. Do I really want to do this? Because
sometimes we're so quick on like text, what's that to be?
Like sure, sure, sure, Now I do the practice of
I'll get back to you tomorrow. I'll get back to
you tomorrow. And it's not like you're telling them no,

(31:47):
just get back to them tomorrow. And then how to rephrase.
You don't even have to say no. You could say
I can't now maybe a couple months now we can
we can revisit that, or you know what, I can
but in two weeks or you know what, I can
connect you to someone that that's really aligned with them
and they can't. Right. But just even taking that twenty
four hour period is game changer because I don't think

(32:09):
we realize how many things we just respond on autopilot
every single day, like simple things all day, yes, yes, yes, yes,
and don't take that time to really be like does
this really fit? Can I really do it? Am? I? Am?
I doing it because I just want to please them?
Or even small things, I mean even talking about like
an errand like I mean, it sounds so trivial, but
those things add up. We end up doing like twenty

(32:31):
of them a day without intentionally, and just that practice
of it on little day to day things makes it
easier than to discern those larger questions that we have
and decisions.

Speaker 1 (32:43):
We have to make.

Speaker 2 (32:45):
Yeah, I think you're also touching on the idea of
just like you know, carving out time just for you
to legitimately sit there if you have to and process right.
I think because of the world that we live in
them it's your point, text messaging, everything is so on demand,
and everything's moving so quickly, and we always have a
place to be, and we can always see what our

(33:05):
friends are doing in real time, and we're always missing
out on something. You know, it's easy to just keep
going on to the next thing, onto the next thing,
or with entertainment, just sort of numb yourself out for
hours on end binge watching TV or things like that.
And I think what's oftentimes missing in a lot of
people's practice and and why maybe they have that sort

(33:25):
of noise in their heads because they're just not taking
out that time.

Speaker 1 (33:28):
To truly just sort of work through all.

Speaker 2 (33:31):
The thoughts that are happening and process them in a
healthy manner and get clarity on like what is to
your point, the inner child screaming for attention and what
is you know, actually the thing that's the burning desire
within them?

Speaker 1 (33:42):
Right?

Speaker 2 (33:43):
And yeah, for me, it's been journaling where I like,
if I find myself getting anxious or I'm just having
these like, you know, thoughts that are battling each other,
it's like, all right, let me stop whatever the hell
I'm doing, let me just write for a little bit
and it'll eventually it works itself out on the pages
for me, or just like getting it out on paper
allows me have a little bit more clarity and relaxation
to like, you know, get receive the next download is

(34:04):
what I call it, you know, And I think that's
a great sort of piece of advice, and pop in
here one more time.

Speaker 1 (34:11):
We'll take a quick break and then we'll be right back.

Speaker 2 (34:18):
All right, we are back, and something I want to
talk to you about because I hear this this narrative
a lot and I'm curious your take.

Speaker 1 (34:24):
I think in the world of like the entrepreneur Bros.

Speaker 2 (34:27):
It's you hear a lot of the narrative of following
your passion is a terrible piece of advice, essentially, if
somebody wants to find success, right that is, there a
lot of the narrative that happens there. So for a
lot of them, I mean, obviously for them, they're defining
success as the accumulation of wealth, right And and I
think that also, even if you're not a materialistic person,

(34:52):
the reality of it is, we live in a world
where you do need money to survive, right and uh,
and much of the stress of our lives does come
from the lack of money essentially.

Speaker 1 (35:00):
Right.

Speaker 2 (35:01):
But their sort of argument is you should go after
thing that you're inherently skilled at, even if you're not
super passionate about it, because it's probably going to be
the thing that makes you the most financially successful.

Speaker 1 (35:12):
Right.

Speaker 2 (35:13):
And I think that is a the narrative that's been
prior to transfer from our parents, right, especially who have
their own trauma around finances and just want to give
us the safest and most direct line of sort of
sight to get the American dream as you sort of
put it and touch on. But I'm curious for you
kind of what would be the advice you would give

(35:34):
somebody who is sort of in that maybe that in
between stage of thinking if they should chance their passion
or if it's even a viable sort of you know,
reality for them.

Speaker 3 (35:43):
Yeah, and yeah, definitely that narrative is from our our
culture narrative. I don't even know everything, but I think
there's there's a balance, Like like you said, like we
need to have some you need some sort of financial
security whatever that is, right, but it's also questioning you
need to know what that is and like what is

(36:05):
the lifestyle you want and how much you really need?
Because I think that's the other questions like we always
talk about, like that's what it talks about. That's I
think that's what I was mentioning earlier, being very clear
on what that vision is, but like what's the feeling
and impact and then working backwards and what is the
money you need to create that? Because then you realize
it then and there it's not the millions and millions

(36:26):
millions of dollars to create that. And even if you had,
let's say you had to choose between the millions, millions
of dollars or the feeling and impact. You're going to
most more likely, and now you're going to choose the
feeling and impact. But there's a way though of making
money on your how to. So I don't like to
use the word passion because passion, for me, is only
one part of your purpose. So, like you know, your

(36:47):
purpose is like one of it is what you love. Right, So,
like I give an example of my book. I love dancing,
I love it, right, but that's not what moves me.
That's not the impact and feeling I want to leave
in the world. Do I love it? Is it a
way of for me an artistic expression? Absolutely, and I
love artistic expression as well, right, but it's not the

(37:09):
thing that I feel that I can bring to the
world every single day, Right, So I like to focus
on like your how to that you bring the way
that you solve problems every single day. That's what your
friends look out for you for, that's what you like,
I mean, well, sometimes if you're let me, let me clarify.
Most of the time, like you're true true friends, you're

(37:30):
champions in your life, look out for you that there
are other people who will look out for you for
other things that you're putting out to the world. So
let me give that capak. But the thing is like,
you're like the people who know you that look out
for you. You have a how to. People need your solution,
and you can make money off your solution. So I
think it's like switching that mindset that it's not I

(37:50):
have to do something that's misaligned with me because there's
only money in there. That's a limiting belief, right So,
and that's a belief that I was taught too. So
I was taught my skill of that, right like purpose.
I was even told purpose was a first world thing,
American thing, like that's not what other people think about
in other countries, and that's not realistic esther, and that's

(38:14):
not for people like us and I and you know,
and I went through a quest. I traveled around the world,
and I'm like, is that true? And guess what, It's
not true. People have purpose, from like fishermen to presidents everything.
Everybody has a vision aspiration, right But even that, like
I had believed that for a while that like even
my gift of helping people like unpack, that was not
a gift I could use in any way as like

(38:37):
a career or entrepreneurship or movement or anything. I believed
that narrative. But the truth is that every time I
entered any job, any place, or anything, that's what I
was doing in there, you know. So what I was
doing was helping people come together to solve whatever problem
was in that workplace. I was going to communities helping
people bring together. When I was in you know, in

(38:59):
college and graduate school, I was forming organizations to do that.
So the thing is, like, you can't hide away from
your how to. You're always going to You're finding ways
to do it right, So it's first like what is that?
And we could even do it here? I could ask
you a question of like, so let's just do it.
So if you had a billion dollar, like two billion
dollars to solve a global problem, what would you do?

(39:19):
What would you solve?

Speaker 2 (39:21):
I would definitely I think Puerto Rico is at my
core a lot of the issues that are facing the
people there, be it lack of you know, the housing
crisis and lack of funds and things like that. So
it definitely causes surrounding the people of Puerto Rico.

Speaker 3 (39:35):
Okay, So let's say like the G seven, Everyone's like,
I love your idea. I'm going to give you two billion,
ten billion, whatever it is money, unlimited amount for you. Yeah,
how would you do it? Give me your steps on
how you would solve for them to give you this money.
How would you solve the problem. And if you don't
know how, how would you figure out the house?

Speaker 1 (39:53):
Oh? I mean I would.

Speaker 3 (39:54):
So.

Speaker 2 (39:54):
I think there's a lot of vacant buildings and homes
and things like that on the island that potentially could
be given in sort of a at least to own,
rent to own type of opportunity for locals, and so
I would rehabilitate those homes and create, you know, opportunities
for locals to be able to rent to own those properties.

(40:15):
And I think that would help keep a lot of
the people on the island and hope. Ownership obviously is
a way of building generational wealth, So that would probably
be the main way I would do it. And then
I think also finding you know, developing programs taking some
of the vacing commercial buildings, rehabilitating them and allowing local
entrepreneurs to start their businesses there and create pathways where

(40:36):
maybe they don't have to pay rent for the first
year whatever it might be, and they can really build
a local community there of local entrepreneurs.

Speaker 3 (40:42):
Okay, So I hear from your first answer is that
you first like analyze what exists, right, and then I
would say your second step is how can we repurpose
what's already there? Right? And you talked about rehabilitating what's
ready there, and the third one is Okay, then I'm
going to scale it and work with other actors and

(41:03):
to look at what other venues and things we could
use after the first one's done, and then we create community. Okay.
So if you were to go text, if I were
to give you a different problem, like I would say,
I want some advice and how I could reach more.
I really want to take my book more to inner

(41:24):
city kids and this messaging right so that they already
know their value and superpower. Would you say you would
follow that same process? Would you first look at Okay,
let's let's look at what already exists out there and
how you can plug in and then okay, then now
let's once we do that, let's go see whoever you

(41:44):
can partner with, and then would you go from there
going okay, now, let's create a community around your movement.
Things like that.

Speaker 2 (41:52):
Okay, yeah, I think I think immediately came to my
head is you know, what are the programs in place
that already had programs and things like that.

Speaker 3 (41:59):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, so say programs in your first answer. Right,
So that is how you solve all problems. Right. So,
if you were to text like five of your friends
in the past, right you, they would probably tell you
something like you help them come up, link them to
existing things that are resources or existing programs that exist
that they could plug into with any advice and any problem. Right.

(42:20):
So in your case, like if you came to me
and said I think I can only start a business
in don't own directly, I would be like, but your
how too? You can think about your skill set. You
know how to you know rehabilitate, you know how to
connect people. You could be you could do coaching, you
could do your own programming, you could be the person

(42:42):
that works with governments, you could be a consultant. Right, Like,
there's so many things right that you could generate money
and wealth with your four step approach. And people need that, right,
puer Rico needs that. I need that right from my
book everybody needs that, your friends that you've impacted, right,
and so that's always they advice. Sec everybody's at you're

(43:03):
you're and I call that your superpower, your how to.
People need that. And these titles and these jobs or
these businesses they're just vehicles to bring your how to.
But if you're not bringing your hell to, Like if
you went to and I'm sure you would find a
way to do it in a dry cleaning business, but
let's say you couldn't. Right, Let's say it was like, uh,
you couldn't hear, you couldn't use your how to it all.

(43:24):
That's when the slow death comes. Because if you're not
bringing out like we as humans want to solve problems,
we want to like naturally do that every day. If
you're not doing that or in some way, then that's
when you see that the businesses fail long term or
people are unhappy because they can't. If you're not able
to do those three steps and able to link people

(43:45):
and help people and and and think about solutions like that,
then you're just slowly running away, which you know and
and it seems like you like linking people. So imagine
if you just worked as like I can see like
if you were just working in a computer all day
doing spreadsheets, that'd be that for you, right, But but
but for other people that would be great. Right. And
so it's when I say it's not necessarily following your passions,

(44:07):
following your alignment. It's following where you can bring your
how to every single day and there's money. And when
you have that flow, there is money for your how
to everywhere, And it's a matter of plugging into places
that will value it, will appreciate it, that it could
lead to impact and and and then that you can

(44:28):
scale at whatever way that that feels good for you.
So that's that's my answer.

Speaker 1 (44:34):
No, I think that's uh, that that's brilliant.

Speaker 2 (44:37):
And I think I think you've You've found a way
to to vocalize something that I've instinctively felt as far
as like like I would always say, you know, like
drug dealers in in like you know, the ghetto are
like actually would have naturally been great entrepreneurs, are great entrepreneurs.
Unfortunately they didn't pivot from like the initial product they

(44:59):
were selling and and move into another part of the
industry that wasn't illegal, right, But they are natural business people,
the ones that are successful in doing their thing right,
those skills can be applied into an actual legal way
of living as well, exactly if they're shown the same
type of conversation that you and I just had right now,
exactly exactly.

Speaker 3 (45:18):
Yeah, yeah, go ahead, No, I was gonna say, because
that people you have to bring your health too, And
so if that's the only space that's in front of
them that they can bring in, but if they're given
the possibility of bringing that elsewhere. Imagine if we gave
people the opportunity to live out their how to into
all spaces it it'd be different. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (45:38):
But and I think I want to harp on this
for for just like a couple of minutes longer, because
I think this is this is not spoken about quite enough,
right because we get fixated on the sort of vessel
that like our interests comes in and we don't like
peel back or layer and kind of realize just how

(45:59):
deep it all is, right Like, like for me, I
was somebody who loved like introducing people to new music
right as like a DJ, and then in radio and
and connecting them to like these you know, little subgenres
in these pockets and niches that are happening that nobody
else is aware of it. I love finding that and
showcasing that. But to your point, that literally is like
you know, something I could apply to a government agency

(46:19):
of finding out where are these grassroots organizations that are
doing interesting work that we can then piggyback with and
work with.

Speaker 1 (46:25):
Right, So it's it's it's I think to.

Speaker 2 (46:28):
Your point, it's getting past like the initial like thing
that we are are in love with visually and recognizing
that like that's just the surface of our interests or
talent or our gift.

Speaker 1 (46:42):
Really this is.

Speaker 2 (46:42):
A far more sort of wide the opportunities are far
more widespread for us once we kind of dig a
little bit beneath the surface of our initial introduction to
our skill set, if you will, exactly.

Speaker 3 (46:53):
And that's like for me, that's why, like with students,
I help them with their how to resume make them
resumes are how too, because I'm like you, it's because
of me to go to that mindset. You can pivot
to anything you want you're how to like you said, right,
could be you could be in the music industry, you
can be in grassroots, you can help authors, it's anything,
because everyone needs that help and I think it's when
you realize, like, that's why people get scared of leaving

(47:14):
their jobs with the situation, because they're like, well, I
only know this one thing, and I've only been doing
I've been doing this for twenty years. And I'm like, no, actually,
you have been that person since you were seven and
or even before, right and so and but you can
articulate it at seven and so when you look back
in your time those five people that you text, you're like,
you've been that person and you've been helping people do

(47:35):
that your whole entire life. This is just the one
place you've been doing it for a time. But you
can do that for anyone, and it's just repackaging it
to that situation, that industry and that thing, and there's
no there's That's why I'm against the American Dream metrics.
It's not it's not so much of uh, it's it's
more like the metrics and you need to do this

(47:55):
by this age and that that's what I mean by
the American dream thing, because it should be whatever your
dream is, it could be that it is aligned with
the American dream. But if it isn't, that's fine too.
It's where is it that you want to go. You
might want to change industries every five years. Maybe you
want to bring your how to to different places. Maybe
you want to help a lot of people. It doesn't matter, right,
It's it's a matter of you're bringing your talent into

(48:18):
whatever spaces you want, that need it, that appreciate it
and value it. So I love that you said that
because I was like, exactly when you're talking about the music,
I'm like, of course you did, like on your how too.
Of course you were, you were you were finding the things,
the forgotten thing. I would even add that to your
to your how to. You look at places that other
people have ignored and seen as like oh no, not there.

(48:42):
You even find that the opportunity of things that that
other people don't see, right, And that's part of your
your your answer when you were talking about there are
vacant buildings already, right, and that you see gaps that
other people don't or opportunities that other people don't. But
imagine everyone needs.

Speaker 2 (48:59):
That absolutely, And I think I think also it because
it comes these things come naturally to us, right, our
innate instincts, and the things that we see, we sort
of discredit them as not being anything special, right, Like exactly,
I'll even be like, there's smarter people out there. If
this was possible, somebody else would have done it or
thought of it, right, And I think that also is

(49:20):
like we fucking shoot ourselves in the foot and unfortunate oftentimes.

Speaker 3 (49:22):
Yes, yes, And that's why I like when I just
you know, socause I even like, you can have one
hundred engineers in the room whatever, you know, whatever we
see as that and you realize that everyone answers their
how too differently, even like if you have the same
career and like, and that's it's noticing that. It's that's
why I like that mindset work is so important. At first,
it's you acknowledging and you're realizing that's superpower. Because some

(49:43):
people are like, ohh, why don't you just fix my resumes?
I'll be landed on them because I need you to
believe it. Like, if you don't believe that it's your
superpower first and you do your own ground truthing in
your life, then it doesn't matter how pretty I fix
something for you. You're you're not gonna go and do it.
You have to believe that, Wow, I do have this gift.
I do have this way of doing things that no

(50:05):
one else has, and it is special and it is needed, right,
we need it. And I think when people realize that
there it's needed to, like Eve and I had to
go through that, that it actually is needed has impact,
then the possibilities are limitless. Right. Then you're no longer
with the oh, I can't make money for it. Oh,
and I can't this because the truth is it's a service, right,

(50:27):
You're serving people and it's an exchange. Money is just
like in this human realm, the exchange for it, right,
and so you're going to get exchange for the value
add that you bring.

Speaker 1 (50:38):
Yeah. No, that's beautifully said.

Speaker 2 (50:39):
And I want to as we kind of get to
the end here, there's a couple of concepts that you
touch on in the book, and I think overall in
your work that I really want to get to because
I think the mindset work is obviously one important key
of it, but then there's the actual practice and the
living aspect of it, right, And I think think it's

(51:01):
it's beautiful when you're in your own little bubble in
your head and you have it all planned out, but
then you open your door and you just get fucking
punched in the face by life and every then everything
that you really got to figure it out at that point.

Speaker 1 (51:11):
Right.

Speaker 2 (51:12):
So, I know you talk about the idea of creating
the conditions that allow you to inspire and allow you
to thrive, right, And you also talk about making sure
that your external actions are in harmony with your internal compass.

Speaker 1 (51:26):
Right, So how does that look in practice?

Speaker 2 (51:30):
As we're navigating through a minute by minute, hour by
hour unpredictability that is life and you know, all that's
happening around us, and also to your point, a lot
of the internal struggles that we still face with our
inner child and and you know, our vices and all
the shit that also comes along that can keep us
from truly being you know, having all of our parts

(51:51):
aligned with one another.

Speaker 3 (51:52):
Yeah. Yeah, And that's why the resilience part is key,
right And sure, And what I mean by the external
even external actions rights is it has you have to
move it from abstract to tangible, right, if that's not
going to happen, And I think where people give up
is that they pile on too much. Right, So we
get this like, oh, we get super excited about our
five year vision, right, We're like, yes, I want this
now I'm clearing my twenty five. But now you have

(52:14):
to break that down, right, And that where people start,
where people give up, is that they pile everything in
the first year. I need to do all this stuff right,
or even hear people like I had this dream and
I started and then I got overwhelmed and I let
it go, or I started to feel like it was unattainable, right,
But that happens because we underestimate the five year and

(52:34):
we overestimate the one year. Right. So it's really important
to be like, this isn't a race, This isn't a
race to prove to someone that I'm going to get
it done in the fastest time possible. Or I want
to get it done because I want people to validate
it and for me and my ideas like next year,
and I'm tired of people doubting me. And that's where
we start to get impatient. But then when we get impatient,

(52:57):
that we start to pile on and life happens, and
then we stop doing it and then we give up. Right.
So a lot of the things I talked about put
the work book is like, okay, let's I like picking
the word of the year and people will be like, oh, well,
that's so cliche, but it is important, right because the
feeling and impact we want to make it five years.
So let's say, like for me to global movie, I'll
give myself an example. So this year my word was magnetic,

(53:20):
like bringing opportunities that are aligned with me in this movement. Okay,
and then next year I already have my word I
already sing is priorities, right, And this is part of
the thing, like priorities to them that I'm not I'm
doing them magnetic, but not at the cost of family
and other things are important to me, right, Okay, So
those those are my words. And then once you have

(53:42):
your words, it's what are three things that I can
do today that lead me to being magnetic? Right? So
I can say, well, I can I can write, I
can write my story on on the pr media. Right,
I can go do a talk, go do some talks, right,
Like three things that I can do today they're under
my control. But then what are three things I need

(54:03):
to learn that are not part of my tool set now? Right?
And so that's when I'm learning. I'm learning how I'm
not marketing is not my forte right, marketing or fundraising.
So I'm like, okay, we'll smoothing. I got to learn
those things. So I'm going to try to learn those things.
Then who do I need to find to support that,

(54:23):
like to put in my circle. I call it your roundtable.
You need to have roundtable, and that can change every year.
Who are the people I need around me that are
aligned with this, right? And so I already know like
I need my friends that have this eye for like
social media for marketing, that are aligned with my thing
name three people, see super simple three things. Okay, So

(54:44):
if I looked at the next year four months, I'm
just going to try, like, in four months, divide that
one thing per month that I can move very attainable.
And even though there's five months, I always say December
doesn't count because you have Thanksgiving, Christmas life. So let's
say you always put time buffers. What's one thing I
can move in a month, like realistically, like one of

(55:07):
those things, and then break that down to little steps
per week, right, and so that way you're celebrating it. Right,
Like every week that I do it, I put on
my calendar, Okay, I need to do this by the
end of the week. Great, I did it. Right, and
I'm moving that one thing per month. And then as
you start creating those rewards right in your body and
in your mind, like, look, I'm moving and jotting it

(55:29):
Like I use one of those calendars. You get the
mail and I put every little action I took. Right
at the end of the year, you have a full thing.
But our mind, we have to create habits and we
have to do these things. We have to celebrate them,
create it. So think about like our inner child was
rewarded for different things. We have to create that same process,
but rewarding us for our legacy. And then that's how

(55:51):
you create it. It's these simple things, right, we're learning,
we're doing threactions for this, and then we can go
from there and revisit again. Okay, how can I do
this a little more right but still reasonable, still not
in an overwhelming and still keep in with our life right,
and so keep with our other things. But we're committed
and prioritizing this life we want to build. But it

(56:14):
doesn't have to be like some people are like I
need to now change everything. It's kind of like they
see it like a fitness program, and I'm like, it
has to be at first it has to be like that,
like like that slow in a way that's sustainable for you,
because this is not this is this is this is
not like a sprint. This is a marathon. And let's
keep those habits. And then as you get more comfortable

(56:37):
with it, as you start thinking about it more, right,
of course, you can can add on. But that's where
when you can start that process of committing yourself to
this word, and and then you stop letting life, you
start letting life happen for you, not at you. And
that's important. It's because then you're now you're thinking about
your word and you're feeling an impact. So even when

(56:57):
like there's chaos and people getting sick or whatever, that's fine,
that's happening, but it's not happening to me. It's just happening.
The other thing is happening.

Speaker 1 (57:06):
For me, right right.

Speaker 2 (57:08):
Yeah, It's crazy because I think, as you're speaking, my
entire career is flashing before my eyes, and I'm looking
at it through like the lens of like where was
the common thread? And I see it's just so clear
to me now where the common thread was throughout all
of it, right, And I think in reflection back on

(57:30):
maybe why the journey felt so tumultuous was because I
am an overachiever. I'm gonna wheel things into existence, but
I couldn't see the actual like blueprint in my head.
So I was like grabbing in the dark until I
found the thing that I latched onto and made it work.
But I stressed myself out by not having clarity on like,
you know, cause you're I think, what the point of everything,

(57:52):
of what you're talking about is like when you clearly
and concisely can see.

Speaker 1 (57:56):
This is where what I'm good at.

Speaker 2 (57:57):
This is where I naturally begin to recognize pat and
therefore I can apply that same blueprint to any other
endeavor I'm interested in. Immediately you know how to get
to work on that thing right, and you're not having
to go through the like just the you know, internal.

Speaker 1 (58:12):
Struggle of like what the fuck is going on right now?
Basically right?

Speaker 2 (58:15):
And and I think that is a gift in itself,
and it's why you see successful entrepreneurs pivoting from industry
to industry and industry and finding different you know, success
because they have a blueprint of knowing where their strengths are,
what they're seeing, and they apply it to the next
project right, and they can easily easily just slide into

(58:36):
that next phase right. And I think even for someone
like me, I've had a you know, I've been lucky
enough to have success, but I keep feeling like I
still missing that next level of whatever it's supposed to be, right,
like the tangible now there's no looking back type of thing,
you know, And I think it is that lack of
clarity of like, what is my blue to your point,

(58:56):
you're how to write, You're easily let me go to
this very easy thing to like process this and not
make it more complicated than it needs to be, right,
And I think it speaks to the power of why
having people around you And I'm blessed that I get
to speak to people like yourself for a living, but
like you know, reading the books or getting the coaching
or just trying to find people who are thinking in

(59:17):
in progressive ways because they allow you to see things
that you aren't seeing as clearly, and that could be
you know, instrumental in all of your success moving forward.

Speaker 3 (59:27):
Yeah, and having like and and why Also when you
know your own how to write, you realize where are
my gaps and who do I need to have around
me right, Like I'm like when I said I was
going to learn, like some work pure, it's more so
I can compliment. But no, I'm not going to become
the master at that I have. I am a master
at my own thing. But that's why I'm going to
have those other people to support me. And I think

(59:47):
it's also changing that narrative that and the narrative of
collective power, right, Like other people don't have yours and
that's where you can help them, and that's when the
collaborations are so important. And like, but the thing is
we're taught right blazers, like we need to pay the
path alone. But it gets to a point where we're
trying to really leap into that. Like you said, like
that next big level, it's not meant to be alone.

(01:00:09):
We're meant to do it together, collaborative, collectively, and that's
when we can lean on other people's superpower and help
each other, and helping each other, we become greater. And
I think it's when you know that clarity that you
don't have to have it all figured out or I
don't know that so I'm a failure. No, you have
your own thing. Other people have their own thing. Bring

(01:00:31):
it together. Right, You just bring it together and it's
going to explode and help you help them and they
help you, and it's great. But we need to change
that as a culture and society, right because we were like,
we need to be self made, we need to do
it alone. But when you actually, like study like those
people that have made it, but they didn't do it alone,
that's it's not ever self made. They had mentors, they

(01:00:54):
had coaches. Kobe had twenty coaches. You know, actuallys do
we normalize it for athletes, but we don't normalize it
for ourselves and we need to have and maybe it's
not Maybe it's not a coach, it's your friend that
has to superpower that you can both help each other
and support each other. Right. It can come in so
many different forms. And I think that's why I like

(01:01:15):
having that third category there too, because you know, as
Hygie Orgy, we just want to get to work. But
it's taking a pause back and going It's not the
put your head down and get to work, right, That's
that's what we were taught. It's how can I be
strategic about this where I don't burn out or I
lean on my community, where I create what my legacy,

(01:01:36):
but also create collective power and community. In that way,
I don't go into loneliness, I don't go into burnout.
I'm taking care of me, but also you know, and
also still helping others.

Speaker 1 (01:01:47):
Yeah, yeah, no, beautifully said.

Speaker 2 (01:01:49):
I mean, obviously the book is called Creating Your Limitless Life.
Last thing I want to ask you is what does
it mean to be limitless?

Speaker 1 (01:01:58):
What does that mean to you?

Speaker 3 (01:02:00):
For me, the limitless is that you're living out your
your vision right your vision of feeling an impact in
whatever way that is. And that's why I said, there's
no limits to that. It can be as big you
knows as you want it, or as small as you
want it. That's up to you. But there is no limit,
there is no strictions, there is no box. You know,
it's it's whatever you want it to be. And I

(01:02:21):
think that's why I shared my story. Every vision that
I had, I've created it, every aspiration, I've created it
into a reality with right with in the community and
around me and so and I plan to continue that
and help other people continue that. So that's limitless. There's
no there's no such thing there. It could be whatever
you want it to be. You don't have to fit
any box.

Speaker 1 (01:02:41):
I love that.

Speaker 2 (01:02:43):
Anything you want to shout out, I know you have
your your coaching program about your company BacT Change where
you do a lot of this amazing work, your socials.
What do you want to shout out for people to
check out more aside from the book obviously creating your
Limitless Life, yeah everywhere.

Speaker 3 (01:02:57):
Now I have the book and work book. I mean
my main thing is access. So the book and workbook
are ninety nine cents. Like for me, this is more
than a business. I like to see. I like to
describe myself to social enterprise and movement right. So the
tools are there. My full coaching program is in the workbook.
My thing is I want you to be able to
do this for yourself. I really believe it's going to
make a world a greater place. So grab it. Do

(01:03:21):
those exercise you can do it even with your family,
your partner, yourself, anybody, like even with your job, right
and and just reflect on that and create it. And
I like to hear from people, So I'm on Instagram
be I Change. People write to me like, oh this
is what I like, is what you know? This is
what I found through my process. I respond, I like,
this is about building community and you're not alone.

Speaker 1 (01:03:44):
I love that.

Speaker 2 (01:03:45):
Well, thank you so much, doctor Esther for having on
the show. This has been an amazing convo. And yet
anytime you need aything, please feel free to reach out.
You always have a platform here.

Speaker 3 (01:03:53):
Thanks, thanks, thanks everyone, Thanks for listeners.

Speaker 2 (01:03:56):
Man, big shot to my guests this week, Doctor esther
Is and the Dong for hopping on the show. I
was again, I took away so much from this conversation.

Speaker 1 (01:04:05):
I hope you did as well, you know, and we'll
tie everything we talked.

Speaker 2 (01:04:08):
About today in a neat little bow in a segment
we call conclusion stew.

Speaker 1 (01:04:13):
But first to take a quick break and then we'll
be right back.

Speaker 2 (01:04:21):
Time come.

Speaker 1 (01:04:28):
Man.

Speaker 2 (01:04:28):
So I just kind of wanted to, like, I guess
I don't want to summarize the conversation, but I think
for me, the thing I took away from it that
was like most effective was really analyzing how my mind.

Speaker 1 (01:04:41):
Worked, right like that little exercise she sort of did.

Speaker 2 (01:04:44):
Where she was like, oh, if you had, you know,
all the money in the world to do whatever you want,
would how would it?

Speaker 1 (01:04:47):
You know?

Speaker 2 (01:04:47):
What would you do? And then how would you go
about it? And then her breaking down, Okay, well this
is like how your mind works. And it was eye
opening for me to say, and and and again. This
is something I loved it because because I always sort
of reiterate this to people, the thing that you found
success in in your life can be applied to every
aspect of your life. You sort of just have to

(01:05:09):
change like the players and change the.

Speaker 1 (01:05:12):
Specifics of it. But it's a blueprint for how your
mind works.

Speaker 2 (01:05:16):
And I think she beautifully broke it down in a
far more clear way than I think even I have
been able to sort of process that concept. And I'm
really excited to get the workbook that is a part
of this as well to kind of dive deeper into it.
But I think, you know, the beauty of all of
this stuff is, for me, the narrative oftentimes of like,

(01:05:41):
you know, why we can't have the things we want
in this life or we can't find success?

Speaker 1 (01:05:46):
Right, we can't find you know, the same sort of
success of people we look up to.

Speaker 2 (01:05:54):
And I've spoken about this a ton in my life,
but you know, sort of a lot of the narrative, specifically,
like my father passed out to me out people who
became wealthy or successful and discussing sort of the advantages
that they had in their life. That's why they're successful.
And for some short I think that that might play
a part in it. But I think what I'm beginning
to realize is a lot of these these people, their

(01:06:20):
success and continued success and the ability to reinvent themselves
is the result of them just knowing how their mind
works and to continue putting themselves into situations that even
if on the surface they look different than the thing
that they found successful in the past, they are you know,
sort of if you dig a layer deeper, it's actually

(01:06:42):
the same exact situation, just again different sort of players
or different scenarios, but the same type of situation, right.
And you know, I think I'll give you an example
just to make it like really practical, right, And this
doesn't even mean like pumping myself up, and I'm actually
just like the conversation with her led me down a

(01:07:04):
rabbit hole of analyzing all of the successes that I've
had in my life and finding the common thread from
all of them, and this is something you can practice
and sort of in that common thread, then looking at
my life as a whole currently and saying, Okay, where
are there opportunities for me to apply this concept into

(01:07:26):
other avenues that can help me sort of ascend to
the next level that I'm striving for. Right, And even
just now thinking about an example that that's come to
my mind is I've talked about this, I think a
little bit before, but I had invested in in a
U haul business, right, And on the surface, the response

(01:07:47):
I always get from people when I say that, when
I tell them that, they're like, you haul.

Speaker 1 (01:07:51):
That's so random, that's so out out there. Why you haul?
Like because most people associate me with, you know, working
in the entertainment industry, right, and.

Speaker 2 (01:08:00):
Projects that are associated with that, right, creative projects, and
even you know, until now, really, as I think about it, yeah,
it didn't make sense to me. And what was ironic
to me is I'm running a very successful U haul business.
And I don't even like say that as a braggadocious
way of like money or whatever.

Speaker 1 (01:08:22):
I'm running a.

Speaker 2 (01:08:22):
Like, statistically successful business from the metrics of UHUL right
their corporate metrics, where I'm ranked in the top one
hundred of U haul dealers across all of North America. Right,
So we're talking like twenty seven thousand dealerships. I'm in
the top one hundred and again that doesn't mean like

(01:08:43):
I'm making you know, the most money out of all
of them. It just means by their own metrics as
far as like the size of my lot, the amount
of trucks I'm able to hold, the amount of rentals
I do, you know, in comparison to the amount of
trucks that I have, all that, you know, customer ratings,
all the things. Right, they put all those metrics together
and create like a you know, sort of statistically who

(01:09:06):
is operating at a high level, right, And it's not again,
it's not regardless of like actual gross revenue. It's in
terms of basically, I guess who's doing the best of
what they got, right, because I don't have a gigantic
the building that I owned, the property that I own
isn't a gigantic parking lot, so I can't facilitate like,
you know, thirty trucks at a time, or else we'd

(01:09:27):
be you know, monetarily killing it. But it's basically who's
doing the best of what they have and now reflecting
kind of in the structure that she gave me. It
makes complete sense right, Because how did I get this dealership?
I saw an opportunity in a program that they had, right,
an existing thing, as she said, where I didn't have

(01:09:49):
to put up any real money upfront to open this business.
I saw somebody else in the area doing it and profiting,
and I saw the opportun unity there. And then you
all provided me with their structure that they already have
in place for this type of business, and I was

(01:10:11):
able to combine my vision for oh, there's an opportunity
here with the structure that was existing that they provided
me with, with the thing that I had to bring
to the table, which was the property I owned, and
my ability to manage something based upon a given structure
that already exists, my ability to prosper within that structure.

Speaker 1 (01:10:37):
So what does that mean.

Speaker 3 (01:10:42):
For me? Right?

Speaker 2 (01:10:44):
I'm like, I'm trying to break this down in a
way that it's like, oh, now I can apply this
to other aspects of my life. Okay, So I have
the ability to see potential opportunities that aren't mainstream yet
that that could be beneficial.

Speaker 3 (01:10:57):
Right.

Speaker 1 (01:10:58):
That's I was able to see this U haul.

Speaker 2 (01:10:59):
Dealership program that isn't a widely known thing by the
mainstream public and see the value in it, right, same
way that I was always able to see, Like I
could predict who's going to be the next big artist
pretty often, or I can see the scenes that are
bubbling up and kind of predict the next trend, right.
And I was doing this unknowingly. I was always the
guy like, oh, this is the next cool music. I

(01:11:19):
always knew about an artist before they popped off at
the radio station. I like always could tell, you know,
our program directors like, oh, yeah, I've known about that person.

Speaker 1 (01:11:26):
They've done this, this, and that. I was always that
that like person.

Speaker 2 (01:11:29):
Right, So I recognize things before they become mainstream, and
I recognize and I work well in utilizing existing structures essentially, right, So.

Speaker 1 (01:11:43):
That means.

Speaker 2 (01:11:45):
There and I'm almost like, stay with me here, I'm
running I'm running around in my head a little bit.
But I'm pointing this out because a narrative I had
in my head for a long time after many failed
business ventures and sort of the voice of my pay
parents in my head. The narrative I was running with
was I am not a good business person. Possibly right,

(01:12:10):
I'm not a good entrepreneur.

Speaker 1 (01:12:12):
Maybe I'm not cut out for this because I had
a few failed endeavors.

Speaker 2 (01:12:18):
And now I'm operating a successful business in the form
of Uhaul, in the form of a podcast production company
as far as hosting goes, right, So obviously I am
capable of operating a successful business. So what is lacking
in those failed endeavors aside from experiences or aside from

(01:12:42):
maybe knowledge of a particular sector of an industry? What
was the difference thing? The difference sort of between my
successful business and my failed ones. And now recognizing, oh,
when I have a bit of when I have the
ability to utilize an existing structure, that's where I begin

(01:13:02):
to find success, right, because I already have the vision
to the foresight to see a trend before it happens, right,
So that exists, that's my strength. I could see the
opportunity gap essentially, and now what do I need to
make the most of that God given sort of vision

(01:13:26):
that I have intuition? Then I need to find a
business that has an existing structure that I.

Speaker 1 (01:13:34):
Can build upon and utilize. Right. So that's what I
did with you Haul.

Speaker 2 (01:13:39):
I saw something that was an opportunity that wasn't known,
wasn't mainstream, right, I didn't have to buy a franchise
like most people are traditional routes of franchise franchising where
you have to you know, purchase it and have a
lot of money upfront and all these things.

Speaker 1 (01:13:52):
I found a loophole, right, I'm great at finding those.

Speaker 2 (01:13:55):
And then I was able to utilize U Haul's existing
structure to get me the foundation to run my business.
And then within that structure, my creativity, my intuition, my
sort of whatever, my my my work ethic, whatever it
might be, allows me to flourish right and allows me

(01:14:17):
to flourish at a at a high level that maybe
puts me above the average person operating within the same field,
within the same area. But now what does this mean?
So again, this says, Okay, my intuition tells me X

(01:14:38):
is a good idea, or is a bubbling you know, scene,
a niche, whatever it might be. Okay, we've recognized my
intuition telling me this and that, you know, are are
things that I foresee happening in the future.

Speaker 1 (01:14:51):
We ready recognize that I have a gift there. Now
I have to apply.

Speaker 2 (01:14:59):
The practice of knowing I operate best when I have
a given structure in place, I operate best utilizing a
structure that is already in existence, and I sort of
just use my visionary you know, talents or whatever my
natural gift to sort of exploit.

Speaker 1 (01:15:20):
It in a good way beyond what the norm usually
uses it for.

Speaker 2 (01:15:26):
Right, So, if I'm looking for my next business venture,
my next idea, it's follow your intuition and where within
that intuition does an existing structure lie that you could
utilize your advantage? And what does that do for me
my mindset? It automatically puts me in a place of knowing, oh,

(01:15:50):
I can be success. Not only can I be successful,
I have the formula to continue success, continue being successful,
or the formula that's going to give me the best
possible odds of being successful because I know the way
my mind works, and I know the way that I

(01:16:10):
know now how to play to my strengths. I know
what I need in order to bring out the very
best in me, and that is I think the game
changing thing where now, you know when I create, a
lot of times when I create, like you know, when

(01:16:32):
I have an idea for something, there's a level of
self doubt.

Speaker 1 (01:16:35):
Of like can I really do it? Can I really
do it?

Speaker 2 (01:16:37):
At a high level now this sort of new mindset
or this clarity that I got just from this conversation
with with Esther is like, yeah, it's actually very tangible
as long as I stick to the blueprint that come
that I know is me working at my highest level.

Speaker 1 (01:16:56):
Right.

Speaker 2 (01:16:56):
That puts me in a position to utilize my strengths
rather than trying to operate in a place where I
you know my weakness is because we all have them.
Nobody is great absolutely everything, And now actually I know
where my strengths lie. Therefore I also know the areas
that I'm not great at. So in partnership, I can
now know exactly who I need to partner with to

(01:17:18):
provide me with you know, the things that I'm not
actually good at, right, to balance that out. And that's
why this work is so important and why it's a
great reminder that like, if we haven't found success yet
or we're not where we want to be, it's not
because we're not good enough. It's because we haven't figured

(01:17:38):
out our unique blueprint that is the thing that will
ninety percent of the time put us in a position
to find success at whatever it is we're going for.

Speaker 1 (01:17:53):
And that's the only difference between people.

Speaker 2 (01:17:56):
Who have achieved high levels of success and us they
figured out what their actual blueprint is and the structure
that needs to be in place for them to find
success in a given endeavor. And they're just rinsing and repeating,
that's what we need to do, and that's tangible. That's

(01:18:16):
a tangible thing, right. It's no longer just like punching
in the dark. Now you legitimately can like light up
the whole fucking room. You know exactly where you're going.
That's why this is so powerful. And I can't wait
to get her workbook to dive even deeper into this.
And now I just want on a tangent. I'm literally
just working through this in my head as I'm speaking

(01:18:38):
to you. But yeah, I think it's it's just.

Speaker 3 (01:18:44):
It all.

Speaker 2 (01:18:44):
Like literally the more I talk about it out loud,
the more dots begin to get connected for me, and
I'm like, oh shit, this is what's been missing. This
is like it's amazing. So with that said, I hope
you got as much had that conversation as I did.
Big to Doctor Esta Satadan for hopping on the show.
Go check out their their movement BacT Change. Just incredible,

(01:19:06):
incredible stuff. And we're actually gonna have her husband, Paul
on the show and coming.

Speaker 1 (01:19:12):
Up as well.

Speaker 2 (01:19:13):
And he had a great perspective on a lot of
different things, and it was just, yeah, just really really
cool stuff to bring to the platform that I'm obviously
really excited about. So hope y'all enjoyed this conversation.

Speaker 1 (01:19:26):
And that's it.

Speaker 3 (01:19:27):
Man.

Speaker 2 (01:19:27):
I'll catch you on Thursday for our Thursday Trends episode,
So then stay safe and we'll talk soon. Life as
a Gringo is a production of the micro Thura podcast
network and iHeartRadio.