March 29, 2022 • 29 mins
Throughout Jessica McDonald's tumultous childhood, there was one person she could always turn to: her grandmother Abbie, who becomes McDonald's biggest cheerleader. McDonald becomes a superstar for multiple Cactus High School sports teams, but the Sereno Soccer Club she plays for after school is where she truly stands out. And as McDonald leads Sereno to multiple state titles, she catches the eye of legendary University of North Carolina women’s soccer coach Anson Dorrance. Suddenly, soccer is more than a distraction; it becomes an escape from Phoenix entirely.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Long Shot is a production of McClatchy Studios and I
Heeart Radio. Previously on Payback. Jessica's mom throughout high school
would get letters of intent from all of these schools,
and my mom always kept them. She taught me sacrifice.
She sacrificed not going to college for me. Essentially, I
did like five years when I was off in I
(00:22):
was missing my keys, and you know, I watched my
mom get a views a lot, and then she would
reciprocate that on me. Thank God for sport. That was
my escape. They were just going to run one lap
around the track and Jessica just left the pack. She
happened to be at soccer field one day and she
was just smashing balls into the KNT. It's the spring
(00:51):
and producer caught to Stevens and I were entering a
small stucco house in Glendale, Arizona. It's not that different
from the other Adobe style homes in the New brohood.
It has a terra cotta colored roof and characteristics of
traditional Southwestern architecture. A pair of large shrubs sits at
the top of the walkway, and the grass that frames
the short driveway in the sidewalk is brown, dehydrated, and patchy.
(01:15):
It's nothing particularly noteworthy from the exterior, but that's not
the case once you go inside. Thank you for having us.
I'm Alice, okay, so I was the one you talked
to you on the phone earlier. This is for Jessica McDonald.
This house was a refuge during her teenage years when
being at home was untenable. Sometimes it was a good option,
(01:38):
other times it was the only option, but it was
always here when jess needed it. This is the home
of Abby McDonald, Jesse's maternal grandmother. Thank you guys for coming.
This is a great day because you got a game
coming out. Did you play a sacca? I played volleyball
growing up. Kevin McDonald, Jesse's uncle, brought us here. The
(02:00):
soccer match on the big screen TV in the living
room is a testament to Abby's love of the game.
But the thing you can't miss are the photos and
her love for her family. Nearly every square inch of
her home, living room, kitchen, bedroom is covered in family pictures.
This me and my kid. Who's h this is me?
(02:21):
This is uh so the rain, Dammy Stephanie, Tracy, Laurie
Michael In this Kevin Kevin moved into this home to
help take care of Abby after she suffered a stroke.
Soccer is a big thing, so we always make sure
we catch every game. We just want her to be
(02:42):
as comfortable as possible because she did so much for everybody.
You know, above and beyond what any parent should do,
and sometimes what any grandparents should do. But as Abby
sees it, she's always done exactly what was needed to
help her family. When I gotta call that Tracy her
bar free and and what we're going on in the department,
(03:05):
I'm knocked on that door boom as to give me
Jess out of there. I browed to my house as
you have. Free from the Charlotte Observer, Raleigh News and Observer,
McClatchy Studios, and I Heart Radio. This is Payback. I'm
Alexandrea and this is part three. The Safe Place. We
(03:35):
are at Cactus High School. Kevin met us here and
that's Justica's uncle who's been facilitating. He's kind of talking
to someone right now to hopefully let us in the
gym to walk around and see some of Justice's old
trophies and banners that are up Cactus High School on
the north side of Glendale is known for sports. Since
(03:58):
it opened in the late seventies, the Cobras have produced
roughly a dozen professional athletes across baseball, football, and soccer.
My daughter went here, actually she played basketball here. She
actually made party as a freshman, so that was a
good thing. And few families in Glendale played sports at
a level like the McDonald's. Were you here, Yeah, yeah,
(04:20):
I think I came her junior senior year. So I
was a teacher back in the day, so I didn't
have her any classes or anything. But remember she played basketball,
and the whole family's like legendary. So as soon as
you said the last name, I'm like, whatever, you need
to committed what you want. So this is David Saraphin,
the assistant principal at Cactus. Sara Fin agreed to show
us around the school, and any tour of Cactus High
(04:40):
starts with the sports trophy case. Yeah, so I think
she was for the two thousand four championship, so I
think her pictures there. There's her trophy, right, is that? Yeah?
It's also the carpets, the walls. Everything inside the school
looks square and modern and gray or beige, except for
the accents and a color known as Columbia blue. It's
(05:02):
the same color I war as a volleyball player in college.
I'm here in the desert. It might as well be
me on jem too. Got the hardwood floors, Yeah, help
the pictures up at the athletes. Sarafin told us that
today Cactus High has about dred students, but that it
used to be larger back when jess and her half
(05:23):
brother Brandon attended the school, and their cousins before them,
and their parents before that. It seems the past few
years are pretty much the first ones when there hasn't
been a McDonald at the school. Their sturdy six state
championships in there, and the McDonald family was a part
of a lot of those. Just a very legendary on
our campus. The entire family and especially Jessica. Features still
(05:45):
follow her story and there was a lot of interest
in the soccer after what she was able to accomplish.
Paraffin led us to the school bookstore and their yearbook
archive there. If you want to grab her here, let's
see if we can find her two thousand five or seniors. Ah,
(06:12):
that is a very classic looking tank, little necklace, the
short hair she has, I know what's the exact same
jess letters and track, basketball and volleyball for the Lady Cobras.
Her accomplishments spoke for themselves, but they're in those yearbooks.
(06:32):
We caught glimpses of young Jesse's personality. Jessica McDonald of
the hip Hop Club, but some serious moves at the
homecoming assembly. Hip hop Club. That's a new one. She's
gonna have a lot of pictures of her clowning around
because she is a big goofball. Kevin McDonald told us
that despite everything going on in her home, jess was
(06:52):
widely regarded by her teachers as a bit of a
class clown. Jessica likes a lot of R and B
and hip hop music. She has a another side to
her that the old Nirvana and stuff like that. She
loved that kind of stuff, but mostly R and B.
You put a good hip hop song, and like I said,
she was stopping traffic to make sure she's dancing correctly
to the music. You know, she's always trying to have
(07:13):
maximum fun. That's what I would always call her, maximum fun.
She was just one of the you know, sweetest kids
I ever coach here. Knew she was just a really
nice kid, great person to having class. Mark Ryan was
just as junior English teacher at Cactus saraph and spontaneously
called him on his cell phone, A'll be towards the school,
and then he handed us the phone. But I until
(07:33):
I saw her on the basketball court, I'd never really
give that my tend. It was just kind of a
wow experience immediately. Ryan was also an assistant coach on
her basketball team, and jess helped lead them to to
state titles in two thousand four. In two thousand six,
we would do tend suicide and they kind of did
it their own taste, and she'd be finished while everybody
(07:54):
else about like on their fifth or sixth long. Honestly,
she is the best you know after I've ever seen
in person. Key Well, you've got to have one key player.
That key player is Jessica McDonald. While everybody else was
still running, she'd start doing push ups. One of the
best athletes in the state, definitely the best athlete on
the floor today. Is a very legendary on our campus,
(08:14):
the entire family and especially Jessica. You want She's at
the state record for the four hundred and her first
year ever running track I'm noted that Jessica is who
she is. I'm like she'd beat boys and girls too much.
Mad the Cores have reclaimed the state championship. It was
(08:37):
it was kind of nuts. She was just incredible to watch,
and yet for all her athletic success, that Cactus High.
It was the sport Jess played elsewhere that offered her
a way out of Glendale and a woman who had
never played sports herself who showed her it was possible.
More on that after the break four to one, that's
(09:04):
got to be it. Yeah, because this is Kevin's track.
Okay good. Jess McDonald's parents may argue over where she
got her athletic talent, but Jess told us there's no
question where she got her grit. Okay you for having
(09:26):
us my grandmother. She grew up in Alabama and they're
easy boards and good piece. She's gone through way more
than I can possibly imagine. This picture appear the big,
the big African art picture having McDonald is eighty four
years old. Now. She's a petite woman and sat in
(09:47):
a wheelchair when we met her at home a few
years back. A stroke cost her some of her mobility
and her speech is no longer as clear as it
once was. Yeah about it about forty years ago, But
her physical ailments are easy to forget, offset by her
frequent animated laughter, So everything in is like me. Abby
(10:08):
graduated from an all black high school in Alexander City, Alabama,
in the nineteen fifties. She did her part for gender
equality as well and listening in the Air Force as
part of her program that had grown during the Korean
War All Roder Air Force F six three Your Pure
to Land. The women in the Air Force were known
as Laughs and were celebrated in recruiting videos like this
one from Ninette. Now over here in the field of
(10:31):
Air Force communications are newly created wafts specialists who send
messages over a worldwide network by push button teletype. Abby
was sent up state New York for training on how
to use those teletype machines. Though she told us she
was one of only two black students in the class
and that our instructor expected her to fail, So she
(10:51):
responded the only way she knew how and made hask
Going the class. He got up in front of the
person at the oh we're gonna phase out made the
last grade in here, and he was upset he didn't
know me. I'm a worker and I can do anything.
Abby was cunning in the classroom, but other wives experienced
(11:14):
her sharp tongue whenever they got on her bad side,
Like one woman who Abby's does called her the un
word to her face. I looked at that. So what
did you say? As it bids you don't lost your mind?
I'm gonna ring your name the grandma shoot back, big Abby, Yeah,
(11:35):
you don't hold back. Nope, punch just as father Vince
meires Vince math big gott be right. Around the time
he and Tracy got pregnant, we had a rough door
s I no, you don't buck. As the years went on,
I gotta like being Abby. She talked about people right
there in fun they face, I'll be we let me
ease down here. Here's so we're gonna be fighting up
(11:57):
over here. She cool, she fell like it, Eve, I
like Abby told us that her relationship with Jesse's mother, Tracy,
was often tempestuous. When Tracy was a teenager, Abby thought
her rebelliousness was becoming recklessness. During Jesse's childhood and home
(12:19):
full of abuse and neglect, Jesse's grandmother became the one
person she could rely on as well. She knew things
that was happening with my mom. She didn't necessarily know
my mom's attitude towards me. She just knew like there
were times I needed help, that was it. Whatever was
just said to her, that was it. And she was
there for me a lot throughout my life. Like without
(12:40):
my grandmother, I wouldn't be where I am today. I
just wouldn't. She's definitely the backbone of the family. Abby
remembers one night in particular, and the terrified phone call
she received saying Tracy and her boyfriend were fighting and
Jesse needed help. Abby told me she raced over to
Jesse's home and slammed on the door when I got
a call that Tracy her bar freend and what were
(13:03):
going on in the department. I didn't even put on
my globe. I just put on my robe, put I'm
made some shoes and went there and knocked on that door.
I didn't knock our bawn boom boom has to give
me Jessic out of there and about desk the my
house because in my house is peace. They ain't on
(13:24):
that boo. I brought to my house as you're free,
kids don't have no reading to suffer. If we could
pick our pants, we will. We would be everything in
the world if we could choose them. But we don't
(13:45):
choose that. Parents, dog it. We can't just became a regular.
That be's home. In the following years, spending a few
days here, a few nights there, when it became clear
that Tracy wouldn't be a ton in Jessice games. Growing up,
Abby did so when she could. Sports were never Abby's calling,
(14:05):
but Jess, as her grandmother, taught her other lessons that
were valuable on the field, and that was particularly true
in a Phoenix suburb or Jess was always one of
the few black students in her class, and often the
only black player in the game, so I really didn't understand,
like we knew we were black. And she would always mention,
you know, you're the only black kid out there, the
only black kid at this tournament, and you can't react
(14:28):
the way people are expecting you to react. If something happens, Oh,
you're gonna call me this to my face in the field,
and my grandmother be like, you shut her up with
your actions, You shut her up with your skill, you
shut her up with you know, your soccer intelligence. As
what is your name? What is your name? Let's call
that to you. Only thing they do and they want
(14:50):
you to get kicked out of game because you better
play than what they are and don't fall in that trap.
You know, we were taught that racism was going to exist.
There's just something to expect because we were the only
black kids growing up and so we had to carry
ourselves in a different manner than any other kid out there.
If I would have gone into the same tackles and
curse the ref out the way. You know my teammate
(15:13):
has who's white, I'd probably have a red card because
of my skin color. I told her, don't let nobody
steal your joy, and I'm saying that to vote for you.
Don't let nobody's do your joy. Okay, keep it in man.
And when I say you're gonna win, you're gonna win.
(15:34):
Keep it in man. And with Abbey in her corner,
just found that joy with the Sereno Soccer Club. This
is the weightlifting that's less Armstrong showing us around the
Victoria north of Phoenix, a complex where elite soccer stars
(15:56):
in their early years on their raw talents. Arms Strong
was the director of this Reno Soccer Club. This place
is massive. It's you know, I mean, I'm not sure
if you know that Arizona well, but this is right
in the middle of everything, in a state full of deserts,
being in the middle of everything can feel like the
middle of nowhere. But that's also a great place to
(16:18):
build a destination training center. With almost seventeen thousand square
feet of court space, bleachers, state of the art locker rooms,
medical staff, and more. They have building all these soccer
fields on this side here, amazing fields. I'm sure of
duck quality. If Jess were coming up through the system now,
this is likely where she would train even as a professional.
(16:39):
It's an option when she comes back to Arizona. When
I initially watched her play, she was terrible. I mean,
her first touch was terrible. The ball would bounce off
of her legs and you know, but she was so
fast she could catch anything, and the end of mistake
she made she was able to make up for. Without
athletic ability, Multiple female athletes who went on to play
in the World Cup also play it at Serena, including
(17:01):
Sidney LaRue and Julie Arts for the US team. In
Adriana Romero for Mexico how a game and boots so
much a year after year or she got a little
bit better and a little bit better and a little
bit better, and thought she was one of the ones
like she would see it to the rest of stop
whine and let's get home with it. I can't ever
remember having to reprimand Jess about anything talking box. She
(17:22):
was an extremely polite kid. I know she had a
very strict grandma. Um, she would be the one that
would be maybe complaining about stuff. Jess ultimately played for
Serena for seven years outside of Cactus High, she would
become a soccer star. I was just very grateful to
obviously join such a great team and great coaching staff
(17:44):
as well. Here's Jess and I was like, all right,
this this has got to be my primary sport now.
Now I see what Brandon has been going through and
why he feels the way he feels about the sport.
It seems clear that the stability and guidance Jess received
on the field had ripple effects off of it. That
was something of a theme we discovered in Jessic's life
and a dynamic that often unfolds for athletes from disadvantaged backgrounds.
(18:07):
What we do know from the child development literature is
that for those youth that do not have a stable, loving,
caring adult in their own household, those needs are not
being met. Nicole Lavoy is the director of the Tucker
Center for Research on Girls and Women in Sport at
the University of Minnesota. Over the past thirty years, the
(18:28):
Tucker Center has led research, education, and advocacy for girls
and women in sport. They often will seek another non
familial significant other in their lives that can provide that stability,
and many times that person is a coach. Having someone
feel cared about, valued, seen, heard that is immensely important
(18:54):
to the development of youth because we know that when
youth have one positive of carrying significant adult in their life,
it can buffer the toxicity and neglect and abused experienced
in other parts of their life. Thanks to the structure
and guidance at Sereno and support from her grandmother, That's
(19:15):
truly came into her own On the field. Whereas other
players had a tendency to try different positions, Jess only
had one striker. She went straight to the goal all
the time. Individual statistics weren't really kept for Justice Club teams.
But we know she helped Serena win the state title
every year she played for them. Grandma was a little
bit overly exuberant, let's see, in the sidelines, and she
(19:38):
was just probably less armstrong. Again, all the men were
afraid of them. She wouldn't take any crop from them.
So it was good, you know, because it kept them
shut up. You know, I just thought it was funny.
But playing a club sport for a club the caliber
of Sereno is expensive. With team fees and offseason camps
and field maintenance and coaches salaries and uniforms and more
(20:00):
are playing club soccer can cost more than a few
thousand dollars a year. Jess told us her family couldn't
afford that for one child, much less for Jess and Brandon. Yeah,
club soccer is very expective. We couldn't afford that. My
brother and I. We didn't pay a single scent for soccer.
Our club paid for us. It was like a scholarship.
They paid for us to play, and so did other
(20:22):
parents who were part of our teams. You know. The
only thing we paid for release, you know, and shin guard,
and that's it. We reached out through Armstrong to the
families that helped Jess and her brother financially. They declined
to participate in this podcast, so we don't know if
their reasons were purely altruistic or perhaps because having Jess
on the field their own daughters look better, but Armstrong
(20:42):
said that they were happy to support the McDonald's. The
thing about Jess was nopody resented anything because she was
such a good teammate to such a wonderful kid, you know,
nice to everybody. Even though she got many many accolades,
she never you wouldn't have known it by talking to her,
you know, just a humble kid. As the attention around
Jessice success at Serina grew, it wasn't long before college
(21:05):
coaches started coming to watch, including the one person who
may be most central to the history of women's soccer
in the United States and who would have a lasting
impact on Jess's life. It's the United States against Norway
for the first ever women's World Championship of Soccer. The
head coach of the USA, Anson Dora Anson Dorrance, coached
the U S women's national team to their first World championship.
(21:26):
In our ambition, what to get here? Our ambitions? To
win this thing, so frankly will be disappointed if we
don't come out the winner. Dorance earned that position through
his ongoing success at the University of North Carolina. Over
the past forty years in Chapel Hill, Dorance has won
twenty two national championships. I mean, you'd have to be
(21:48):
blamed to not see Jess McDonald. Every single coach in
the country wanted Jess McDonald. But Anson downs Is at
that time, he's God, you know. Less Armstrong told us
that over the years Florences are scruited multiple Sereno players.
There was some other schools obviously for how they would
have given do scholarships for Jess, you know, I mean
at that time, she was just that dominant you know,
(22:10):
at that time in the North Carolina was they will
win in national championships of the year. You know. Of
course they wanted to go down and so a Titan
of Soccer scheduled a recruiting visit to Glendale. But Jess
told us that on one of the most important days
of her life, everything almost fell apart. More on that
after the break on normal weekday mornings in the spring
(22:35):
of two thousand five, Jess drove herself here to Cactus
High School. It was her junior year and Jess had
a Nissan Ultima. Brandon had left her when he went
away to college in California. On normal days, she would
park and walk towards the big blue front door. The
day Dorns came to town, it was not a normal day. Oh,
(22:56):
I woke up. I was super nervous because this is
my dream of school. It's in my dream school since
I was a little girl. North Carolina Women's soccer is
arguably the greatest dynasty in all of college sports. But
because Jess came to soccer a bit later, she told
us her connection to the school became a bit different
Michael Jordan's. I grew up watching Michael Jordan's and you know,
he made tar Heel a thing. You know, he made
(23:18):
it like the school you want to go to, the colors,
the environment, everything, And so as early as I can remember,
I've always wanted to be guitar hill. Lawrence told us
that even beyond her talent, Jess's determination stood out. She
puts something on her shoulder that all right, I'm going
to prove myself today. Every coach loves that kind of
player that just works and works and works and works
(23:39):
and works. They always feel like they have something to prove.
For me, that was Jessica. Jess though college and Chapel
Hill could be her escape aunts, and Lawrence was coming
to meet my mom. And mom this important day. Make
sure you calm my girl, launch break. This is when
ans is going to be here. Like a parent has
to be present. If a parent is not present, then
(24:01):
it's like against like n c A A regulations. It
was like, you know, a long list of rules here.
So I had to have parent guardian there, and she knew.
The recruiting process for us is usually a phone call
once a week. Durrance again. And so for me it
was you know, whether I could get her on the phone,
and then when I didn't, I am speaking usually actually
(24:24):
to the grandmother, but originally it wasn't the grandmother, it
was the mother. So of course, you know, I'm thinking, oh, gosh, okay,
So she's bouncing between households growing up, and I get it.
I know why the grandmother's involved. It's just as sports
notoriety grew, it introduced a new and uncomfortable dynamic with
(24:44):
her mother. Tracy. Yeah, I remember at one point it
kind of made her feel uncomfortable, but she somewhat supported me.
She's like, oh, you're doing good, okay good, and that
was kind of it. It wasn't the kind of support
that people would expect from their parents. Teen motherhood had
caused Tracy McDonald to end her athletic career before it
(25:04):
ever really began, and now Jess was on the verge
of realizing the very success Tracy never did. Tracy did
not respond to repeated interview requests for this podcast. I
can only recall I met a mom twice at games
serena director less Armstrong again. She might have been at
more because I don't go over and you know, introduce
(25:25):
myself to the parents. So I don't know why. You know,
never Rosked never inquired. I just maybe I shoot him.
The day of Jess's official big visit with Lawrence, she
says things at home with her mother were tense. Tracy
also needed to use the car Brandon had left in Glendale,
so Jess told us her mom drove her to school.
(25:46):
I remember just reading her vibe and it just like
wasn't a good one. It was like, oh, this is
this is the Tracy I'm getting today. Okay, Let'm not
just even saying anything, you know, but like we're in
the car, and then I finally just said something back
to her. And I've never we're spoken back to my
mom ever. I just let her just, you know, say
these crazy things, these crazy things. And this day I
just about had it and I said something to her
(26:09):
and she just punched me right in my mouth and
she was like, you don't talk back to me. We
pull up to my school. Here I am with this
bloody lip. I'm like, I just started my day off
like this. I'm over it. I just spent much of
the morning fighting back tears. But even beyond the shock
of getting hit, she wasn't sure who would attend the
meeting with Dlorance. NC Double abor rules required a parent
(26:32):
were a guardian to be present, so she called one
of both and then they I think her and a
mom I got into it. So she called me up
to the school and me to sack the coach. Jess
told us that the phone call asking her father and
Smires to come to Cactus High it was about the
first time she remembers asking him for anything. I founked
(26:54):
out afterwards everything afterwards, you know, she told me, I beast,
she got into a fight. I know. Oh, Mama, I
hate it. Just also called her grandmother. Abby told us
she never knew the specifics of the incident in the car,
but when something goes wrong and a child is hurt,
Abby has heard all she needs to. Did she ever
talk to you about this? No, but I knew there
(27:19):
was something going on, and you don't need to know
the pacific But when Sam going around a child hurt,
you know it's bad and it's about about it. I'm
both Fence and Abby attended the meeting with Drance, but
Jess's mind was already miles away on the verge of
her dreams. All she could think about was the grim
(27:41):
reality of the altercation in the car. Why why did
you do that? Are you kidding me? It was heartbreaking, man,
It's like one of the most heartbreaking moments that I've
ever had with my mom. And I ate that that
is still in my memory, but that's just the thing
that will never die out of my mind. And you know,
the life changing day for me. And just like so
(28:03):
many different kinds of ways, like holy crap, the meeting
itself was a blur on the most important day of
Jesse's young life. She was completely unaware of herself as
a body in space, of her future as an athlete,
of what might be waiting for her going home that night.
But somewhere in that day just made a choice to
(28:24):
disrupt the cycles of the present, even if it cost
her future. And on part four of Payback, I ran
away from home when I was seventeen years old, and
to this day, I have not been back since. When
she told me what she dealt with, I was just
in tears something. How do you deal with that? My
life just completely changed. I'm seventeen years old on my own,
(28:45):
trying to take care of myself. Someone stripped of the
tools in high school to try to succeed at collegiate level.
Is going to continue to have to fight tooth and
nail to recover Jess Donald, I'm ALEXANDREEV. Payback is a
production of The Charlotte Observer, Raleigh News and Observer, McClatchy Studios,
(29:05):
and iHeart Radio. It's produced by Cotta Stevens, Casey Toth,
Julia Wall, and Davin Cockburn. The executive producer for iHeart
Radio is sewn Ty Tone. For lots more on this story,
and to support journalism like this, visit Charlotte observer dot
com slash payback or news observer dot com slash payback.
(29:27):
And for more podcasts for My heart Radio, visit the
I heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen
to your favorite shows,
Long Shot is a production of McClatchy Studios and I
Heeart Radio. Previously on Payback. Jessica's mom throughout high school
would get letters of intent from all of these schools,
and my mom always kept them. She taught me sacrifice.
She sacrificed not going to college for me. Essentially, I
did like five years when I was off in I
(00:22):
was missing my keys, and you know, I watched my
mom get a views a lot, and then she would
reciprocate that on me. Thank God for sport. That was
my escape. They were just going to run one lap
around the track and Jessica just left the pack. She
happened to be at soccer field one day and she
was just smashing balls into the KNT. It's the spring
(00:51):
and producer caught to Stevens and I were entering a
small stucco house in Glendale, Arizona. It's not that different
from the other Adobe style homes in the New brohood.
It has a terra cotta colored roof and characteristics of
traditional Southwestern architecture. A pair of large shrubs sits at
the top of the walkway, and the grass that frames
the short driveway in the sidewalk is brown, dehydrated, and patchy.
(01:15):
It's nothing particularly noteworthy from the exterior, but that's not
the case once you go inside. Thank you for having us.
I'm Alice, okay, so I was the one you talked
to you on the phone earlier. This is for Jessica McDonald.
This house was a refuge during her teenage years when
being at home was untenable. Sometimes it was a good option,
(01:38):
other times it was the only option, but it was
always here when jess needed it. This is the home
of Abby McDonald, Jesse's maternal grandmother. Thank you guys for coming.
This is a great day because you got a game
coming out. Did you play a sacca? I played volleyball
growing up. Kevin McDonald, Jesse's uncle, brought us here. The
(02:00):
soccer match on the big screen TV in the living
room is a testament to Abby's love of the game.
But the thing you can't miss are the photos and
her love for her family. Nearly every square inch of
her home, living room, kitchen, bedroom is covered in family pictures.
This me and my kid. Who's h this is me?
(02:21):
This is uh so the rain, Dammy Stephanie, Tracy, Laurie
Michael In this Kevin Kevin moved into this home to
help take care of Abby after she suffered a stroke.
Soccer is a big thing, so we always make sure
we catch every game. We just want her to be
(02:42):
as comfortable as possible because she did so much for everybody.
You know, above and beyond what any parent should do,
and sometimes what any grandparents should do. But as Abby
sees it, she's always done exactly what was needed to
help her family. When I gotta call that Tracy her
bar free and and what we're going on in the department,
(03:05):
I'm knocked on that door boom as to give me
Jess out of there. I browed to my house as
you have. Free from the Charlotte Observer, Raleigh News and Observer,
McClatchy Studios, and I Heart Radio. This is Payback. I'm
Alexandrea and this is part three. The Safe Place. We
(03:35):
are at Cactus High School. Kevin met us here and
that's Justica's uncle who's been facilitating. He's kind of talking
to someone right now to hopefully let us in the
gym to walk around and see some of Justice's old
trophies and banners that are up Cactus High School on
the north side of Glendale is known for sports. Since
(03:58):
it opened in the late seventies, the Cobras have produced
roughly a dozen professional athletes across baseball, football, and soccer.
My daughter went here, actually she played basketball here. She
actually made party as a freshman, so that was a
good thing. And few families in Glendale played sports at
a level like the McDonald's. Were you here, Yeah, yeah,
(04:20):
I think I came her junior senior year. So I
was a teacher back in the day, so I didn't
have her any classes or anything. But remember she played basketball,
and the whole family's like legendary. So as soon as
you said the last name, I'm like, whatever, you need
to committed what you want. So this is David Saraphin,
the assistant principal at Cactus. Sara Fin agreed to show
us around the school, and any tour of Cactus High
(04:40):
starts with the sports trophy case. Yeah, so I think
she was for the two thousand four championship, so I
think her pictures there. There's her trophy, right, is that? Yeah?
It's also the carpets, the walls. Everything inside the school
looks square and modern and gray or beige, except for
the accents and a color known as Columbia blue. It's
(05:02):
the same color I war as a volleyball player in college.
I'm here in the desert. It might as well be
me on jem too. Got the hardwood floors, Yeah, help
the pictures up at the athletes. Sarafin told us that
today Cactus High has about dred students, but that it
used to be larger back when jess and her half
(05:23):
brother Brandon attended the school, and their cousins before them,
and their parents before that. It seems the past few
years are pretty much the first ones when there hasn't
been a McDonald at the school. Their sturdy six state
championships in there, and the McDonald family was a part
of a lot of those. Just a very legendary on
our campus. The entire family and especially Jessica. Features still
(05:45):
follow her story and there was a lot of interest
in the soccer after what she was able to accomplish.
Paraffin led us to the school bookstore and their yearbook
archive there. If you want to grab her here, let's
see if we can find her two thousand five or seniors. Ah,
(06:12):
that is a very classic looking tank, little necklace, the
short hair she has, I know what's the exact same
jess letters and track, basketball and volleyball for the Lady Cobras.
Her accomplishments spoke for themselves, but they're in those yearbooks.
(06:32):
We caught glimpses of young Jesse's personality. Jessica McDonald of
the hip Hop Club, but some serious moves at the
homecoming assembly. Hip hop Club. That's a new one. She's
gonna have a lot of pictures of her clowning around
because she is a big goofball. Kevin McDonald told us
that despite everything going on in her home, jess was
(06:52):
widely regarded by her teachers as a bit of a
class clown. Jessica likes a lot of R and B
and hip hop music. She has a another side to
her that the old Nirvana and stuff like that. She
loved that kind of stuff, but mostly R and B.
You put a good hip hop song, and like I said,
she was stopping traffic to make sure she's dancing correctly
to the music. You know, she's always trying to have
(07:13):
maximum fun. That's what I would always call her, maximum fun.
She was just one of the you know, sweetest kids
I ever coach here. Knew she was just a really
nice kid, great person to having class. Mark Ryan was
just as junior English teacher at Cactus saraph and spontaneously
called him on his cell phone, A'll be towards the school,
and then he handed us the phone. But I until
(07:33):
I saw her on the basketball court, I'd never really
give that my tend. It was just kind of a
wow experience immediately. Ryan was also an assistant coach on
her basketball team, and jess helped lead them to to
state titles in two thousand four. In two thousand six,
we would do tend suicide and they kind of did
it their own taste, and she'd be finished while everybody
(07:54):
else about like on their fifth or sixth long. Honestly,
she is the best you know after I've ever seen
in person. Key Well, you've got to have one key player.
That key player is Jessica McDonald. While everybody else was
still running, she'd start doing push ups. One of the
best athletes in the state, definitely the best athlete on
the floor today. Is a very legendary on our campus,
(08:14):
the entire family and especially Jessica. You want She's at
the state record for the four hundred and her first
year ever running track I'm noted that Jessica is who
she is. I'm like she'd beat boys and girls too much.
Mad the Cores have reclaimed the state championship. It was
(08:37):
it was kind of nuts. She was just incredible to watch,
and yet for all her athletic success, that Cactus High.
It was the sport Jess played elsewhere that offered her
a way out of Glendale and a woman who had
never played sports herself who showed her it was possible.
More on that after the break four to one, that's
(09:04):
got to be it. Yeah, because this is Kevin's track.
Okay good. Jess McDonald's parents may argue over where she
got her athletic talent, but Jess told us there's no
question where she got her grit. Okay you for having
(09:26):
us my grandmother. She grew up in Alabama and they're
easy boards and good piece. She's gone through way more
than I can possibly imagine. This picture appear the big,
the big African art picture having McDonald is eighty four
years old. Now. She's a petite woman and sat in
(09:47):
a wheelchair when we met her at home a few
years back. A stroke cost her some of her mobility
and her speech is no longer as clear as it
once was. Yeah about it about forty years ago, But
her physical ailments are easy to forget, offset by her
frequent animated laughter, So everything in is like me. Abby
(10:08):
graduated from an all black high school in Alexander City, Alabama,
in the nineteen fifties. She did her part for gender
equality as well and listening in the Air Force as
part of her program that had grown during the Korean
War All Roder Air Force F six three Your Pure
to Land. The women in the Air Force were known
as Laughs and were celebrated in recruiting videos like this
one from Ninette. Now over here in the field of
(10:31):
Air Force communications are newly created wafts specialists who send
messages over a worldwide network by push button teletype. Abby
was sent up state New York for training on how
to use those teletype machines. Though she told us she
was one of only two black students in the class
and that our instructor expected her to fail, So she
(10:51):
responded the only way she knew how and made hask
Going the class. He got up in front of the
person at the oh we're gonna phase out made the
last grade in here, and he was upset he didn't
know me. I'm a worker and I can do anything.
Abby was cunning in the classroom, but other wives experienced
(11:14):
her sharp tongue whenever they got on her bad side,
Like one woman who Abby's does called her the un
word to her face. I looked at that. So what
did you say? As it bids you don't lost your mind?
I'm gonna ring your name the grandma shoot back, big Abby, Yeah,
(11:35):
you don't hold back. Nope, punch just as father Vince
meires Vince math big gott be right. Around the time
he and Tracy got pregnant, we had a rough door
s I no, you don't buck. As the years went on,
I gotta like being Abby. She talked about people right
there in fun they face, I'll be we let me
ease down here. Here's so we're gonna be fighting up
(11:57):
over here. She cool, she fell like it, Eve, I
like Abby told us that her relationship with Jesse's mother, Tracy,
was often tempestuous. When Tracy was a teenager, Abby thought
her rebelliousness was becoming recklessness. During Jesse's childhood and home
(12:19):
full of abuse and neglect, Jesse's grandmother became the one
person she could rely on as well. She knew things
that was happening with my mom. She didn't necessarily know
my mom's attitude towards me. She just knew like there
were times I needed help, that was it. Whatever was
just said to her, that was it. And she was
there for me a lot throughout my life. Like without
(12:40):
my grandmother, I wouldn't be where I am today. I
just wouldn't. She's definitely the backbone of the family. Abby
remembers one night in particular, and the terrified phone call
she received saying Tracy and her boyfriend were fighting and
Jesse needed help. Abby told me she raced over to
Jesse's home and slammed on the door when I got
a call that Tracy her bar freend and what were
(13:03):
going on in the department. I didn't even put on
my globe. I just put on my robe, put I'm
made some shoes and went there and knocked on that door.
I didn't knock our bawn boom boom has to give
me Jessic out of there and about desk the my
house because in my house is peace. They ain't on
(13:24):
that boo. I brought to my house as you're free,
kids don't have no reading to suffer. If we could
pick our pants, we will. We would be everything in
the world if we could choose them. But we don't
(13:45):
choose that. Parents, dog it. We can't just became a regular.
That be's home. In the following years, spending a few
days here, a few nights there, when it became clear
that Tracy wouldn't be a ton in Jessice games. Growing up,
Abby did so when she could. Sports were never Abby's calling,
(14:05):
but Jess, as her grandmother, taught her other lessons that
were valuable on the field, and that was particularly true
in a Phoenix suburb or Jess was always one of
the few black students in her class, and often the
only black player in the game, so I really didn't understand,
like we knew we were black. And she would always mention,
you know, you're the only black kid out there, the
only black kid at this tournament, and you can't react
(14:28):
the way people are expecting you to react. If something happens, Oh,
you're gonna call me this to my face in the field,
and my grandmother be like, you shut her up with
your actions, You shut her up with your skill, you
shut her up with you know, your soccer intelligence. As
what is your name? What is your name? Let's call
that to you. Only thing they do and they want
(14:50):
you to get kicked out of game because you better
play than what they are and don't fall in that trap.
You know, we were taught that racism was going to exist.
There's just something to expect because we were the only
black kids growing up and so we had to carry
ourselves in a different manner than any other kid out there.
If I would have gone into the same tackles and
curse the ref out the way. You know my teammate
(15:13):
has who's white, I'd probably have a red card because
of my skin color. I told her, don't let nobody
steal your joy, and I'm saying that to vote for you.
Don't let nobody's do your joy. Okay, keep it in man.
And when I say you're gonna win, you're gonna win.
(15:34):
Keep it in man. And with Abbey in her corner,
just found that joy with the Sereno Soccer Club. This
is the weightlifting that's less Armstrong showing us around the
Victoria north of Phoenix, a complex where elite soccer stars
(15:56):
in their early years on their raw talents. Arms Strong
was the director of this Reno Soccer Club. This place
is massive. It's you know, I mean, I'm not sure
if you know that Arizona well, but this is right
in the middle of everything, in a state full of deserts,
being in the middle of everything can feel like the
middle of nowhere. But that's also a great place to
(16:18):
build a destination training center. With almost seventeen thousand square
feet of court space, bleachers, state of the art locker rooms,
medical staff, and more. They have building all these soccer
fields on this side here, amazing fields. I'm sure of
duck quality. If Jess were coming up through the system now,
this is likely where she would train even as a professional.
(16:39):
It's an option when she comes back to Arizona. When
I initially watched her play, she was terrible. I mean,
her first touch was terrible. The ball would bounce off
of her legs and you know, but she was so
fast she could catch anything, and the end of mistake
she made she was able to make up for. Without
athletic ability, Multiple female athletes who went on to play
in the World Cup also play it at Serena, including
(17:01):
Sidney LaRue and Julie Arts for the US team. In
Adriana Romero for Mexico how a game and boots so
much a year after year or she got a little
bit better and a little bit better and a little
bit better, and thought she was one of the ones
like she would see it to the rest of stop
whine and let's get home with it. I can't ever
remember having to reprimand Jess about anything talking box. She
(17:22):
was an extremely polite kid. I know she had a
very strict grandma. Um, she would be the one that
would be maybe complaining about stuff. Jess ultimately played for
Serena for seven years outside of Cactus High, she would
become a soccer star. I was just very grateful to
obviously join such a great team and great coaching staff
(17:44):
as well. Here's Jess and I was like, all right,
this this has got to be my primary sport now.
Now I see what Brandon has been going through and
why he feels the way he feels about the sport.
It seems clear that the stability and guidance Jess received
on the field had ripple effects off of it. That
was something of a theme we discovered in Jessic's life
and a dynamic that often unfolds for athletes from disadvantaged backgrounds.
(18:07):
What we do know from the child development literature is
that for those youth that do not have a stable, loving,
caring adult in their own household, those needs are not
being met. Nicole Lavoy is the director of the Tucker
Center for Research on Girls and Women in Sport at
the University of Minnesota. Over the past thirty years, the
(18:28):
Tucker Center has led research, education, and advocacy for girls
and women in sport. They often will seek another non
familial significant other in their lives that can provide that stability,
and many times that person is a coach. Having someone
feel cared about, valued, seen, heard that is immensely important
(18:54):
to the development of youth because we know that when
youth have one positive of carrying significant adult in their life,
it can buffer the toxicity and neglect and abused experienced
in other parts of their life. Thanks to the structure
and guidance at Sereno and support from her grandmother, That's
(19:15):
truly came into her own On the field. Whereas other
players had a tendency to try different positions, Jess only
had one striker. She went straight to the goal all
the time. Individual statistics weren't really kept for Justice Club teams.
But we know she helped Serena win the state title
every year she played for them. Grandma was a little
bit overly exuberant, let's see, in the sidelines, and she
(19:38):
was just probably less armstrong. Again, all the men were
afraid of them. She wouldn't take any crop from them.
So it was good, you know, because it kept them
shut up. You know, I just thought it was funny.
But playing a club sport for a club the caliber
of Sereno is expensive. With team fees and offseason camps
and field maintenance and coaches salaries and uniforms and more
(20:00):
are playing club soccer can cost more than a few
thousand dollars a year. Jess told us her family couldn't
afford that for one child, much less for Jess and Brandon. Yeah,
club soccer is very expective. We couldn't afford that. My
brother and I. We didn't pay a single scent for soccer.
Our club paid for us. It was like a scholarship.
They paid for us to play, and so did other
(20:22):
parents who were part of our teams. You know. The
only thing we paid for release, you know, and shin guard,
and that's it. We reached out through Armstrong to the
families that helped Jess and her brother financially. They declined
to participate in this podcast, so we don't know if
their reasons were purely altruistic or perhaps because having Jess
on the field their own daughters look better, but Armstrong
(20:42):
said that they were happy to support the McDonald's. The
thing about Jess was nopody resented anything because she was
such a good teammate to such a wonderful kid, you know,
nice to everybody. Even though she got many many accolades,
she never you wouldn't have known it by talking to her,
you know, just a humble kid. As the attention around
Jessice success at Serina grew, it wasn't long before college
(21:05):
coaches started coming to watch, including the one person who
may be most central to the history of women's soccer
in the United States and who would have a lasting
impact on Jess's life. It's the United States against Norway
for the first ever women's World Championship of Soccer. The
head coach of the USA, Anson Dora Anson Dorrance, coached
the U S women's national team to their first World championship.
(21:26):
In our ambition, what to get here? Our ambitions? To
win this thing, so frankly will be disappointed if we
don't come out the winner. Dorance earned that position through
his ongoing success at the University of North Carolina. Over
the past forty years in Chapel Hill, Dorance has won
twenty two national championships. I mean, you'd have to be
(21:48):
blamed to not see Jess McDonald. Every single coach in
the country wanted Jess McDonald. But Anson downs Is at
that time, he's God, you know. Less Armstrong told us
that over the years Florences are scruited multiple Sereno players.
There was some other schools obviously for how they would
have given do scholarships for Jess, you know, I mean
at that time, she was just that dominant you know,
(22:10):
at that time in the North Carolina was they will
win in national championships of the year. You know. Of
course they wanted to go down and so a Titan
of Soccer scheduled a recruiting visit to Glendale. But Jess
told us that on one of the most important days
of her life, everything almost fell apart. More on that
after the break on normal weekday mornings in the spring
(22:35):
of two thousand five, Jess drove herself here to Cactus
High School. It was her junior year and Jess had
a Nissan Ultima. Brandon had left her when he went
away to college in California. On normal days, she would
park and walk towards the big blue front door. The
day Dorns came to town, it was not a normal day. Oh,
(22:56):
I woke up. I was super nervous because this is
my dream of school. It's in my dream school since
I was a little girl. North Carolina Women's soccer is
arguably the greatest dynasty in all of college sports. But
because Jess came to soccer a bit later, she told
us her connection to the school became a bit different
Michael Jordan's. I grew up watching Michael Jordan's and you know,
he made tar Heel a thing. You know, he made
(23:18):
it like the school you want to go to, the colors,
the environment, everything, And so as early as I can remember,
I've always wanted to be guitar hill. Lawrence told us
that even beyond her talent, Jess's determination stood out. She
puts something on her shoulder that all right, I'm going
to prove myself today. Every coach loves that kind of
player that just works and works and works and works
(23:39):
and works. They always feel like they have something to prove.
For me, that was Jessica. Jess though college and Chapel
Hill could be her escape aunts, and Lawrence was coming
to meet my mom. And mom this important day. Make
sure you calm my girl, launch break. This is when
ans is going to be here. Like a parent has
to be present. If a parent is not present, then
(24:01):
it's like against like n c A A regulations. It
was like, you know, a long list of rules here.
So I had to have parent guardian there, and she knew.
The recruiting process for us is usually a phone call
once a week. Durrance again. And so for me it
was you know, whether I could get her on the phone,
and then when I didn't, I am speaking usually actually
(24:24):
to the grandmother, but originally it wasn't the grandmother, it
was the mother. So of course, you know, I'm thinking, oh, gosh, okay,
So she's bouncing between households growing up, and I get it.
I know why the grandmother's involved. It's just as sports
notoriety grew, it introduced a new and uncomfortable dynamic with
(24:44):
her mother. Tracy. Yeah, I remember at one point it
kind of made her feel uncomfortable, but she somewhat supported me.
She's like, oh, you're doing good, okay good, and that
was kind of it. It wasn't the kind of support
that people would expect from their parents. Teen motherhood had
caused Tracy McDonald to end her athletic career before it
(25:04):
ever really began, and now Jess was on the verge
of realizing the very success Tracy never did. Tracy did
not respond to repeated interview requests for this podcast. I
can only recall I met a mom twice at games
serena director less Armstrong again. She might have been at
more because I don't go over and you know, introduce
(25:25):
myself to the parents. So I don't know why. You know,
never Rosked never inquired. I just maybe I shoot him.
The day of Jess's official big visit with Lawrence, she
says things at home with her mother were tense. Tracy
also needed to use the car Brandon had left in Glendale,
so Jess told us her mom drove her to school.
(25:46):
I remember just reading her vibe and it just like
wasn't a good one. It was like, oh, this is
this is the Tracy I'm getting today. Okay, Let'm not
just even saying anything, you know, but like we're in
the car, and then I finally just said something back
to her. And I've never we're spoken back to my
mom ever. I just let her just, you know, say
these crazy things, these crazy things. And this day I
just about had it and I said something to her
(26:09):
and she just punched me right in my mouth and
she was like, you don't talk back to me. We
pull up to my school. Here I am with this
bloody lip. I'm like, I just started my day off
like this. I'm over it. I just spent much of
the morning fighting back tears. But even beyond the shock
of getting hit, she wasn't sure who would attend the
meeting with Dlorance. NC Double abor rules required a parent
(26:32):
were a guardian to be present, so she called one
of both and then they I think her and a
mom I got into it. So she called me up
to the school and me to sack the coach. Jess
told us that the phone call asking her father and
Smires to come to Cactus High it was about the
first time she remembers asking him for anything. I founked
(26:54):
out afterwards everything afterwards, you know, she told me, I beast,
she got into a fight. I know. Oh, Mama, I
hate it. Just also called her grandmother. Abby told us
she never knew the specifics of the incident in the car,
but when something goes wrong and a child is hurt,
Abby has heard all she needs to. Did she ever
talk to you about this? No, but I knew there
(27:19):
was something going on, and you don't need to know
the pacific But when Sam going around a child hurt,
you know it's bad and it's about about it. I'm
both Fence and Abby attended the meeting with Drance, but
Jess's mind was already miles away on the verge of
her dreams. All she could think about was the grim
(27:41):
reality of the altercation in the car. Why why did
you do that? Are you kidding me? It was heartbreaking, man,
It's like one of the most heartbreaking moments that I've
ever had with my mom. And I ate that that
is still in my memory, but that's just the thing
that will never die out of my mind. And you know,
the life changing day for me. And just like so
(28:03):
many different kinds of ways, like holy crap, the meeting
itself was a blur on the most important day of
Jesse's young life. She was completely unaware of herself as
a body in space, of her future as an athlete,
of what might be waiting for her going home that night.
But somewhere in that day just made a choice to
(28:24):
disrupt the cycles of the present, even if it cost
her future. And on part four of Payback, I ran
away from home when I was seventeen years old, and
to this day, I have not been back since. When
she told me what she dealt with, I was just
in tears something. How do you deal with that? My
life just completely changed. I'm seventeen years old on my own,
(28:45):
trying to take care of myself. Someone stripped of the
tools in high school to try to succeed at collegiate level.
Is going to continue to have to fight tooth and
nail to recover Jess Donald, I'm ALEXANDREEV. Payback is a
production of The Charlotte Observer, Raleigh News and Observer, McClatchy Studios,
(29:05):
and iHeart Radio. It's produced by Cotta Stevens, Casey Toth,
Julia Wall, and Davin Cockburn. The executive producer for iHeart
Radio is sewn Ty Tone. For lots more on this story,
and to support journalism like this, visit Charlotte observer dot
com slash payback or news observer dot com slash payback.
(29:27):
And for more podcasts for My heart Radio, visit the
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