June 5, 2025 • 30 mins
We say we want healing… but rarely do we talk about the cost of it.
In this episode, I dive deep into a truth most people avoid:
Healing isn’t supposed to feel good.
It’s supposed to hurt.
That grief, that discomfort, that ache in your chest — it’s not a sign you’re broken.
It’s the very evidence that you’re becoming whole again.
I share a personal story about tearing my labrum and how the pain of physical healing mirrors the emotional healing we’re often too scared to face.
We also unpack:
- Why healing is nonlinear and never quick
- The grief that comes from mourning what “could’ve been”
- The myth of “getting over it” vs. the power of integrating your pain
- Why your healing journey isn’t about forgetting the past but learning to carry it differently
- How healing helps rebuild your self-trust, one painful but honest step at a time
If you’ve ever felt stuck, overwhelmed, or ashamed that healing still hurts — this episode is for you.
Because the pain is real, but so is your growth.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
So the reality is that healing should be and almost
always is painful. Like I know that can be a
shock to hear and shocked to understand, But the truth
of that, the reality there is that we choose what's
easy because it doesn't hurt. It doesn't hurt to sit
and just let things be, but it does hurt to
choose to identify the pain and work on it and
(00:20):
grow through it. Healing isn't a linear thing and it's
not something that we'll ever have completely figured out because
it's the stages of our lives. But the truth is
that it hurts. This is made for this mountain with
Josh Rosa or turning pain into purpose. So in this episode,
we were looking at the mountain of healing, and I
know that's like one of the hardest mountains for a
(00:40):
lot of us because it's a consistent thing, Like this
is something that will always pop up into our story.
It always pop up into how we live life. It
always pop up to how we respond, how we allow
people to love us or be present to us. It's
one of those things that isn't quick, and I think
we shy away from this because we've been so accustomed
(01:01):
to our pain that we've just accepted it, we've just
created it as a part of our life. And there's
a lot to say, there are lots to impact on
that reality. But I need you to understand that the
hurt you is not the version of you you are
meant to be, like the one that suffers and consistently
lives in what's happened to them and usually reverts to
that and says that this is why I am the
way I am, or uses it to justify why they're
(01:23):
afraid to do anything else. That version of you is
not the version of you that's meant to thrive or
to be alive. It's the version of you that's trying
to stay so that you, who you actually are, doesn't flourish.
And when we address healing, I need you to understand
that there is no one way like there's so many
different paths of people get to this point. There's so
many things that we will constantly need to heal through.
(01:46):
There are certain wounds in our lives that end up
being a part of our life, but we either have
it as a part of the story as to what's happened,
that why I did what I could do, or we
make it the excuse as to why I couldn't do
the things like that. We tend to hide behind those
wounds because we've given them so much authority. The whole
goal with this episode is to tell you, to empower you,
(02:08):
to grow you into the fact that that wound exists,
but that wound does not define you. That wound, yes,
it's something that's happened to you, it's been a part
of your life, but this thing that's happened is not you.
It's the thing that has been present there. And knowing
how to address that and how to speak into it
and really just unpacking the reality of that, that truth,
it's what we need to do. And everyone there's not
(02:30):
as a good person that lives life and doesn't have
some type of wound or won't have some type of wound.
There's something emotional, relational, or financial, literally something in your
life that has been a roadblock, and what it is
is identifying it. And I want to be clear, no
matter who speaks to you. You can speak to a
thousand different therapists, you can read a thousand self help books,
(02:51):
you can hear all the podcasts you want to hear,
But if you don't do anything, you can't say that
nothing's changing. Yes, you might have heard the words, but
it means nothing to know the things if you don't
have the action behind it. It doesn't mean anything to
know that this thing exists and know how to identify
and know what it sounds like and what it looks like,
but refuse to take the actionable steps to change it. Great,
(03:12):
you have a lot of knowledge and no action. Now
it hurts more because now you know what you should
do and still don't do it. So what I'm getting
at that is that you need to be clear on you.
You need to decide to change these things first before
anything else. Yes, it's great that you're listening to things,
or reading things or all this, but it's more important
that you do things. It's not enough to just sit
(03:34):
here and hear nice words without actual actions. When we heal,
when we grow, there's a pain, there's a pain that's there.
There's a step and stages of pain. And I always
equate this wheneber I talk about healing, I talk about
my labram. I go on my right shoulder. I have
a torn labrum and I can't throw anymore. And what
happened to me is that I was in a baseball
(03:56):
game and longsto Shore Dominicans, of course, so all Dominicans
who play baseball, and this coach he didn't like me.
I'm not gonna tell the whole story, but I ended
up dating a girl in high school and he always
looked at her like a daughter or something like that.
And it didn't it didn't rub him the right way
(04:16):
right And granted I was also like a freshman, she
was a senior, you know, were there. But I remember
he put me in the game and I was by
far one of the best players in the team, and
he benched me because of these things. So I was
playing out of a place of frustration and he put
me in the game, and I wanted to show off.
I was doing like stupid things. I dove for a
(04:37):
play and I and I never played second base at
that point, but I dove for a play and I
jammed my shoulder on the ground and tore my labram.
So from that point on, I wasn't able to play
baseball anymore. Something I love to do, something that was
natural to me, something that was I was the first
one on the field, last one off, the thing that
was a driving passion for me. But because I responded
from a place of frustration, from a place of pain,
(05:00):
caused more wounding, more pain to myself than should have been.
I created this actual pain that's physical, that came from
an emotional thing. Now I tell this story often when
I talk about healing, because it not so much that pain. Yes,
that reality that I did something out of frustration and
(05:20):
that caused an even bigger problem. And sometimes we respond
from frustration, we respond from our hurt, and we cause
bigger issues. We don't think things through, so we end
up hurting ourselves because we're trying to prove something to
someone else. We're trying to throw it in their face.
We're trying to use our gifting, our talent things to
say to these people, Look, look what you missed out on,
(05:40):
and what you end up doing is hurting yourself more. Yes,
that's the reality. But I actually look at this from
the perspective of the therapy, because even though I didn't
get the surgery because Surgeron was apparently elective, I still
went through the therapy process. And the most pain that I've
ever felt was when I was trying to heal a
torn leap. We're trying to heal a muscle or trying
(06:02):
to heal a bone or something that's out of place
some long. When you are going through that therapy, the
thing that hurts the most is the actual therapy, is
the thing that is healing you, is the process of
you getting back to this place that you used to
be in, because that's the reality that healing actually hurts.
When we do the thing that was hurt with the
think that was wounded, this part of us that that
(06:25):
is causing this problem. The therapy itself is going to
be a process of pain because now you have to
revert to something that the muscle has been wounded in
and does is not used to doing it anymore. It's
it's scared because of obvious attention that was pain, obvious
things that are happening, but also the process of it
and knowing that you have to go and stretch and
(06:46):
move and do all these things that your shoulder and
it's got hurt and there has to be a process
of that. A lot of people are afraid of the process.
The reason that we don't heal is because we've become
comfortable with not actually living in that process us by
saying that, well, if I don't do this thing I
won't feel that pain. I won't have to address it.
I won't have to change it. If I don't have
to look at it, if I don't have to be
(07:07):
in it, then I don't have to remember what's happened.
For a lot of us, we're afraid of the therapy.
We're afraid of the thing that's going to heal us.
And we'll talk a little bit more about that after
this commercial break. So welcome back just this reality where
we struggle to heal because we are afraid to touch
the wound. We're afraid to go near the thing that's hurting,
(07:28):
we're afraid to do what we need to do in
that place. And again I use that therapy analogy that
just the movement of that. Now, it's always a tough
one when we come to this mountain of healing to
understand that this mountain in front of me is something
that is going to be challenging. And I love the
crazy that. I think this is such a great name
for a podcast because there is so much reality about mountains,
(07:51):
about the struggles we're facing them, about the things that
we're seeing, the adversity that's found within that thing. But
there is this beauty of excess. When you confront the
thing that you have made a mountain in your life
and actually overcome it. There is so much power in
that ability. And anyone that's ever done something difficult, anyone
(08:11):
that's ever had again, I'm a hiker, so I love it.
Anyone that's had those kind of hikes where it's like
you're in for hours and hours, but then you get
to that mountaintop, you see that view, You see the
thing that just was so worth the work. You don't
for you don't remember the suffering, like, yes, you know
that it costs you work, but the moment you're there,
it's just the satisfaction of completing that of challenging yourself
(08:35):
to this thing and doing something amazing. We have to
understand that there's this beauty that happens after, right, So
going through that therapy, going through that thing that addresses
the wound, that that says that this thing is there
and I'm not gonna shy away or deny it. Going
towards that this was going to change everything. It's understanding
this reality that I need to touch the wound for
(08:58):
it to be healed. I need to go and do
the therapy. I need to go and put myself through
the process of it. And that's what we're impacking here, right,
this reality that we need to go through this now.
The tough thing when we visit this one is that
healing isn't linear. It's not something that you do something
today and tomorrow another process and it's a straight line.
There are moments of shifting and there are moments and
(09:20):
seasons of it either feeling heavy or feeling light. Well,
us going through that reality. It's the reality that this
is a mountain, it's not a hill, right. So pace
is important, but it doesn't mean that you use pace
as an excuse. Like one thing that a lot of
people say is like, well, I'm in a healing stage,
so they use that quote unquote pace as an excuse
(09:42):
to not do anything. They'll say, well, yeah, this is
it takes time, you know, I'm right, or we're saying
that right now, right, But we're not taking time and
using time as a reason as to why you don't change.
We're not saying, oh, yeah, it takes time, so I'm
just gonna not do anything. It's understanding that there's a
pace and there's a step to it. It is forever
and for some people, they unpack there and they make
(10:03):
that home. But when you do that, you are now
giving that much more authority to the wound. You're now
giving that much more authority to the thing that this
shouldn't exist. So when we unpack this wound of healing,
we talk about healing this mountain of healing, We talk
about this reality that there are all these things that
are happening there. We need to first understand that grief
is a part of this, like mourning what could have been,
(10:25):
having that reality that you are no longer there. And
I think a lot of people, especially with like relationship wounds,
which seems to be like super common, and it is
super common because it makes sense our heart's desire to
love and to be loved. So it makes sense as
to why that wound is so strong and so prevalent,
because that is a wound that is common for a
(10:46):
lot of people. But it's a desire of our hearts.
So for a lot of us when it comes to
this reality, we don't allow ourselves to grieve what we
could have had. We don't allow ourselves to grieve the relationship.
We don't allow ourselves to grieve the story that we
made up in our mind that was there, so we
don't actually heal from it because we're still in this
(11:06):
denial of what's real. Like we are sitting through this
pain of grief without understanding that grief is a process
and it's not a process that again it doesn't happen overnight,
but it's something that we need to learn to identify
as we go along. Knowing that our brains believe this story.
You have to rewire your brain. You're knowing that you
(11:28):
have created this narrative, you created a future, you created
all these things in this particular situation, and now you
have to grieve the death of that. Now you have
to go through grief and understand that things is not there.
And the sad thing about grief is that it comes
in waves. And this is grief from everything, but again
from that particular mountain. Its relationships, but even grief like
(11:49):
in friendships, right, metical relationships or platonic friendships, those things.
Even with friendships, I don't think we talk enough about
the reality that it does hurt to lose a friendship.
It does hurt to sit here and realize that certain
people can't come into the next chapters of your life.
It hurts to sit and think that there are certain
people who you've seen and imagined in your life and
(12:11):
in the most sincere and soft ways possible, but knowing
that now these people no longer belong there. There's a
grief in letting those things go and healing from that,
because I know that we want those people there. There's
there's no situation where you see someone that you love
genuinely in your life and have so much respect for
(12:35):
or so much a moration for, and then have to
realize that they don't fit in this next stage, that
they're not a part of the thing that's supposed to
be healed in you. And I know letting that go
has to be harder than most relationships, right, more romantic relationships,
because that is a reality that's not something that you
ever saw. That you couldn't you couldn't have perceived that
(12:55):
thing being there. But sometimes we don't heal from those
things because we haven't allowed ourselves to fully grieve it
and bury it, to sit and realize that this thing
is no longer present and you don't have to bear
the weight on yourself. And I think this is so
important to understand that you don't have to bear the
weight on yourself or failed relationships, whether it's your family
(13:17):
members or romantic or platonic. What you don't have to
sit here and take on the whole load of what
that thing was, because healthy relationships require more than one person.
Like if this relationship would have been healthy, it would
have been something that you would have done with another person,
not just alone, because that's the point of a relationship,
right we were working together towards this thing. It doesn't
(13:40):
dismiss work, it doesn't dismiss hard times, it doesn't dismiss
these things that are going to come and happen, but
it does require two people to be a part of it.
If the relationship you have with those people, it's going
to require them. And if you're the only one in it,
I need to understand that you were freed from something.
For For a lot of us, we struggle with relationships
because we think we have to be the best person
(14:00):
possible forward to survive and you should be the best
effort of you. But if they can't help you and
support you in your bad stages, then that's not a
healthy relationship. That's a beneficial relationship when it's only beneficial
to them and I'm not saying, I'm not justifying bad
behavior and stupidity and all these things. I am saying, however,
that some people can't love you fully because they don't
love you in the worst versions of you. They only
(14:23):
love the ones the version of you that is beneficial
to them. What can I get from you? That's not
a healthy relationship? And knowing that, understanding that being able
to grieve the good things, and then realizing that you're
not the only one that has to bear the weight
allows you to see things from a clear point. We
need to understand that it's okay to grieve and to
let go that pain is a part of the healing process.
(14:46):
That the same way that we have to grow to
have growing pains is the same way that we have
to allow people to leave and to walk away and
to be where they need to be, so that we
can now detach from those things a myth right that
we have to get over it. There's this reality of
getting over it versus letting it be integrated into your life.
(15:07):
Healing isn't about forgetting or racing what happened. And I
think that's the biggest struggle that we think that as
we heal that we need to forget. And that's not
necessarily true, because it's hard to forget things. It's hard
to sit here and tell yourself that that's a lie
and rewire your brain. And all these things are the
things that you could do naturally, where you could do
by telling you, by again speaking and telling yourself this reality.
(15:29):
But forgetting doesn't mean that you're healed. Right, just because
you don't remember something doesn't mean it didn't happen. Just
because I don't remember the impact of the moment or
how I felt when I hurt my shoulder, it doesn't
mean that my shoulder isn't hurt. It exists. The pain
is real, and it's prevalent. But it doesn't mean that
you have to sit here and allow it to continue
(15:49):
to hold. Yes, you don't forget, because again, you're not
going to lose your memory, But you don't allow your
memory to dictate your emotions. You don't allow what's happened
to you to dictate the steps that you take. You
don't allow your past to be the reason why you
don't have a good and happy and fruitful future. I
think a lot of us are struggling with that component.
(16:11):
Right when we say this when we say healing, we
talk about moving on and growing. We think that we
have to somehow forget, that you have to erase the
memories of the things that have happened, that you have
to sit here and justify those things. That's not the case.
When you are healing. We are now adapting to the
places that we're in. So what I mean by that
(16:32):
is that, yes you don't forget, and yes you don't
let it control, but now you know certain things in
certain places and certain actions that you shouldn't take. The
biggest or the worst, I think the worst thing you
could ever do is have something happen to you and
you not learn from it, and you not grow from it,
you not take something from it. Why because at that
(16:52):
point that thing happened to you in vain like, if
you didn't learn something from that, there was no wisdom
for you in it, And wisdom them is exactly that.
It's understanding that these things have happened and then taking
the tools that've come out of it. Maybe it's how
you communicate, or maybe it's the fact that you no
longer deal with people in certain aspects, or you don't
sell yourself short in certain ways. It's when we take
(17:15):
something productive from it. It's about learning how to integrate
your story so it's no longer controlling your identity or
your future. It's not letting it be the reason why
you didn't do things. It's using it again as the
reason why you did. It's the catalyst to everything good
and productive and prooful. I think we fail to do
those things well because we've given ourselves this, this lie
(17:38):
that forgetting is just naturally going to happen, that we
are just going to one day wake up, happy, healed,
and forgotten of that whole situation. It's not it's also
not a realistic thing to expect. But learning to not
let the memories control the emotions. I think this is
the big takeaway from that. Not letting what happened control
(18:01):
what happens next. I've seen it so many times. I've
had this conversation with a lot of people, believe or not,
and it's a huge impact as to the productive, the
positive things that people move into. Because an example, without
giving too much information, I've had a friend who shared
with me once that their previous relationships have tainted completely
(18:24):
their view on the other sex. Right, They completely tainted
how they see people how they respond to the wayship.
They think that everything is a lie. So but the
way they see that is that they feel that the
emotions that the person is portraying, or the words that
they're saying, or the actions that they're taking is all
manipulative because in their mind, the people that they have
(18:45):
dealt with before have been so bad that it must
be everyone, and so they don't forget that component. They
think that this is just a natural thing with everyone else,
and it creeps into every relationship. And that's why they
have not had a successful relationship ever. If they've never grieved,
they've never let go, they never healed from this thing
that's happened to them before. So what they do is
(19:06):
that they transfer that over what there's a there's a
saying which, well, you don't transfer, you will transmit. Well,
you don't change, and you you will transmit into the
next thing. And if it's in relationships, the things that
you don't heal in you, you will see in the
next place. You will bring that into this next thing.
So what you're doing is that you're not dating new people.
You're just dating the same person in different bodies. You
(19:27):
are trying to fix and heal something you couldn't fix
and heal in someone else. And in these next things,
in these next stages and these next steps, you end
up hurting yourself so much more because you haven't healed
from a memory or from a wound from action of
a person that already impacted you, and now you are
trying to save them everywhere else. I need you to
understand that it is okay to let go of people.
(19:52):
I know, I know it hurts. I know this is
the hard part of forgetting and not letting them control
the narrative. I know that it's difficult to do and
it's easy to say, but you will live in the
same exact wound for the rest of your life because
you refuse to step into what's real. Not everyone is
the same, and there's certain things that we need to
(20:12):
address about that we'll do that after this commercial break
to take you first all even being here for this long,
and I know sometimes it's hard to hear a podcasts
and things that we need to address in us and
then actually take it in and actually do something with it.
But when we're talking about wounds and going back to
places and to people that we have given authority to
(20:34):
that is going to be the hardest level of accountability
we ever live. Why because you have to sit here
and say, what is it about me that is allowing
me to be in these situations again, that's causing me
this pain and the struggle and making me think it's
okay to just unpack there, to continuously be there, to
be present to that. The hardest part of all that
(20:55):
is accountability. I think knowing first that it's not that
I have to get over something, is that I have
to be accountable for the things that I'm letting it
in under me. I have to be accountable for the
things that I'm choosing to go back to or things
that I've made a ceiling or roadblock in my life,
because that is the thing that I haven't healed from.
(21:17):
And I need you to understand that your pain deserves
a seat at the table. Right it's not, But it
shouldn't be the head of it. Right. Yes, it deserves
a seat. It should be a part of the story.
It should be something you used to learn from the
wisdom that you got from it, something you use to
make your next decisions or your next steps, or the
next things you do. But it's not the thing that's
(21:38):
making and dictating all of your decisions. It shouldn't be
the thing that tells you what to do and what
not to do. We don't heal from these things because
we don't allow ourselves to understand what was good from it.
We just think that it is the whole thing that
we're stuck in. So we create this this balance, imbalance
rather and we never should grow. I know it hurts.
(22:03):
I know this is like one of those like, man,
I wish I didn't have to go through this. I
wish I didn't have to feel this pain. I wish
I didn't have to heal from this thing. But it's
the best thing that you will ever do, because the
reality is that everyone is going to hurt at some point.
There is something in us that we're gonna have to
heal from. And again, it's not always relationships. I just
(22:24):
think that's the easiest one and the most common one
and the one we hear the most and the most often.
But there's always gonna be something that we need to
heal from, whether it's a parental wound, or it's a
financial wound, a bad habit that I've picked up, whatever
it is, there's always going to be something that we
need to heal from. And when we learn to use
our pain and our grief and all these things as tools,
(22:48):
it changes how you respond to so many things. Now,
me personally, I've struggled with my own things. I struggle
with my own things now. I feel like one of
the hardest things is that, especially when you're creating this
of content where people think that you have to have
it all figured out, I don't. I feel like a
lot of I know what, I'm grateful for the things
that I don't have figured out, Like, I'm really grateful
(23:09):
for the pains and the struggles I have. Because again,
if you've heard any of my other episodes, you know
that for me, faith is a huge thing and it
allows me to be rooted in my humanity right and
know that I'm flawed and I'm broken and i make
mistakes and I'm still hurt and I'm still healing and
I'm still growing. But I've been able to see this
(23:30):
tool and that's why I honestly this I'm sure there's
gonna be more episodes specifically around this particular matter, because
it's one of my favorite things to talk about, because
I think that when we understand this, We become the
best versions of us when we understand that you are imperfect,
broken and flawed, that you know that you are not
this cookie cutter and everything is like exactly how it
(23:52):
should be. Person you're able to identify the things that
you can grow from and grow through, and it doesn't
become this lie about your life because you're not portraying perfection.
You're portraying reality. And I'm grateful for that. And again,
like I said, my favor is always been a big thing,
and it helps me just understand that that is something
in me that needs to be worked in. I don't
(24:12):
know where you are in your life. I don't know
where you're hearing this podcast from. I don't know what
part of your life you feel like you need to
grow or heal from. But I need you to understand
that even in your imperfection of it, there's beauty in it,
that there's purpose to the thing that's hurting you. Because
when we look at our pains, we know that we
can turn pain into actual purpose. And that's why that's
(24:33):
actually the slogan for this podcast. I think that's such
a good tagline because when you are able to identify pain,
you're able to identify what you can grow from and
what it can be used from. And I mentioned before
accountability being the biggest thing right when it comes to healing.
And the reason why accountability is so big is of one, yes,
(24:53):
one understand what role did I play in my wound?
And I think a lot of us run away from
that that we don't look at the things that have
happened to us. And in certain situations, right, there are
certain situations that that's out of your hand, out of
your control, But there are other situations where we are
a part of our own hurt, where we have to
be accountable for the things that we did or didn't
do right, and that we are a part of that
(25:14):
that thing. But why accountability is so big is because
it's our last point here is because healing is returning
to self trust. It's learning to trust you, it's learning
to trust that that intuition is learning to heal and
grow and know that I have enough power, enough autonomy
over myself to choose what's next. We struggle to heal
(25:36):
because we blame ourselves, like we why did why did
that happen? Or how could I be so dumb? And
I think this is such a big one, like so
many of us go through this reality where we we
will replace scenarios and sit in it and let that
thing become the defining moment in us. And today, today alone,
I did that myself. I will replace scenarios and sit
(25:56):
in it and let those things sit there. But the
difference is that the more I've grown in this, the
more I've been able to address that. And I want
to give you this tool. I think this is a
very important one. If you lasted this whole podcast episode,
this is the best part of it all. The tool
is this is being able to know what you're saying
and know what you're replaying, and knowing that you made
(26:20):
a mistake, and knowing that you feel dumb, and knowing
that you feel like this thing should have been avoided.
Knowing all those things and knowing that those things still
don't define you, Like knowing that your mistakes and your
flaws and that your shortcomings and where you fell short,
that those things are not who you are, and then
being able to say question it, being able to question
(26:40):
the reality of that, what kind of impact does that
actually have in my life? Like is this something that's
actually sustainable or is this something that I'm giving more
flame to you than it deserves. I think for a
lot of us we have that problem, like we let
our thoughts run rampant. And I know, as an overthinker myself,
that there are times where I look at those things
and I just let them grow, I let them fester.
(27:02):
I fan the flame of that because I make that
my thought. But the more you learn about this, the
more you address it, the more you say, listen, this
thing does not have power. I'm able to look at
this thing and know that, yes, I made a mistake,
but I'm not defined by it. And what we heal
When we learn to heal this, we learn to find
(27:22):
wisdom and the things that we've done. And it doesn't
mean that you're gonna be perfect tomorrow. Probably not. You're
gonna probably fail and fall quite a few times. But
when you're able to sit in this and say this
thing is not the end all be all, it's not
all the authority of who I am, you're able to
find the positive it and you're able to look at
the mistakes you made and say, well, let's not do
that again. Let's grow from this. What happens next. Healing
(27:46):
isn't linear. It doesn't mean that you are going to
be perfect tomorrow, doesn't mean that you're gonna have every
detail done, but it does mean that at some point
when you start caring for you, when you start doing
the things that hurt or going through the motion knowing
that there is hurt and healing, when you start actually
(28:07):
doing those things, you start giving yourself the best chance
to be the best version of you. You start identifying
these things in you that could just be catalysts as
a better life and not just a struggle as to
the thing you're in. I know that for a lot
of people there are so many things that are just
stumbling blocks. They're just in the way. And as we heal,
(28:31):
as we grow, as we change, as we make the
best version of us of reality. Because again that's the
whole hope and goal for this podcast. And yes, we
have episodes with other people and they tell us their
mountains and their struggles and the things they've gone through.
But my only hope with this podcast is what I've
seen happen before, where people receive even the smallest nugget
(28:52):
to help them be better people, to help them change,
to help them just be this productive person that they
can be and I address the lies that they've been
in because that's what's happening with a lot of us.
Whether you're hearing it from perfect or imperfect people. The
reality is that the truth is still the truth. And
when you address those things in you, you become the
best version of you. You are not stuck in the things.
(29:16):
Healing is not about you being perfect. Healing is not
about you having it all figured out. Healing is about
you challenging that thing that's telling you that you're not good.
You challenging that thing that's limiting your belief. I need
you to understand that you were made for that mountain,
and as we talk about healing and the process of it,
(29:38):
in the progress of it, you have the power and
the authority to do something amazing, not because anyone else
has said it, but because you deserve it. So thank
you so much for it, for being here, thank you
for your faithfulness in this. I know that healing isn't linear.
I know that you might not have it all figured
(29:58):
out right away, but the is going to be the
walk to walk through this together. So thank you for
being present, thank you for listening, and I'll see you
in the next one.
So the reality is that healing should be and almost
always is painful. Like I know that can be a
shock to hear and shocked to understand, But the truth
of that, the reality there is that we choose what's
easy because it doesn't hurt. It doesn't hurt to sit
and just let things be, but it does hurt to
choose to identify the pain and work on it and
(00:20):
grow through it. Healing isn't a linear thing and it's
not something that we'll ever have completely figured out because
it's the stages of our lives. But the truth is
that it hurts. This is made for this mountain with
Josh Rosa or turning pain into purpose. So in this episode,
we were looking at the mountain of healing, and I
know that's like one of the hardest mountains for a
(00:40):
lot of us because it's a consistent thing, Like this
is something that will always pop up into our story.
It always pop up into how we live life. It
always pop up to how we respond, how we allow
people to love us or be present to us. It's
one of those things that isn't quick, and I think
we shy away from this because we've been so accustomed
(01:01):
to our pain that we've just accepted it, we've just
created it as a part of our life. And there's
a lot to say, there are lots to impact on
that reality. But I need you to understand that the
hurt you is not the version of you you are
meant to be, like the one that suffers and consistently
lives in what's happened to them and usually reverts to
that and says that this is why I am the
way I am, or uses it to justify why they're
(01:23):
afraid to do anything else. That version of you is
not the version of you that's meant to thrive or
to be alive. It's the version of you that's trying
to stay so that you, who you actually are, doesn't flourish.
And when we address healing, I need you to understand
that there is no one way like there's so many
different paths of people get to this point. There's so
many things that we will constantly need to heal through.
(01:46):
There are certain wounds in our lives that end up
being a part of our life, but we either have
it as a part of the story as to what's happened,
that why I did what I could do, or we
make it the excuse as to why I couldn't do
the things like that. We tend to hide behind those
wounds because we've given them so much authority. The whole
goal with this episode is to tell you, to empower you,
(02:08):
to grow you into the fact that that wound exists,
but that wound does not define you. That wound, yes,
it's something that's happened to you, it's been a part
of your life, but this thing that's happened is not you.
It's the thing that has been present there. And knowing
how to address that and how to speak into it
and really just unpacking the reality of that, that truth,
it's what we need to do. And everyone there's not
(02:30):
as a good person that lives life and doesn't have
some type of wound or won't have some type of wound.
There's something emotional, relational, or financial, literally something in your
life that has been a roadblock, and what it is
is identifying it. And I want to be clear, no
matter who speaks to you. You can speak to a
thousand different therapists, you can read a thousand self help books,
(02:51):
you can hear all the podcasts you want to hear,
But if you don't do anything, you can't say that
nothing's changing. Yes, you might have heard the words, but
it means nothing to know the things if you don't
have the action behind it. It doesn't mean anything to
know that this thing exists and know how to identify
and know what it sounds like and what it looks like,
but refuse to take the actionable steps to change it. Great,
(03:12):
you have a lot of knowledge and no action. Now
it hurts more because now you know what you should
do and still don't do it. So what I'm getting
at that is that you need to be clear on you.
You need to decide to change these things first before
anything else. Yes, it's great that you're listening to things,
or reading things or all this, but it's more important
that you do things. It's not enough to just sit
(03:34):
here and hear nice words without actual actions. When we heal,
when we grow, there's a pain, there's a pain that's there.
There's a step and stages of pain. And I always
equate this wheneber I talk about healing, I talk about
my labram. I go on my right shoulder. I have
a torn labrum and I can't throw anymore. And what
happened to me is that I was in a baseball
(03:56):
game and longsto Shore Dominicans, of course, so all Dominicans
who play baseball, and this coach he didn't like me.
I'm not gonna tell the whole story, but I ended
up dating a girl in high school and he always
looked at her like a daughter or something like that.
And it didn't it didn't rub him the right way
(04:16):
right And granted I was also like a freshman, she
was a senior, you know, were there. But I remember
he put me in the game and I was by
far one of the best players in the team, and
he benched me because of these things. So I was
playing out of a place of frustration and he put
me in the game, and I wanted to show off.
I was doing like stupid things. I dove for a
(04:37):
play and I and I never played second base at
that point, but I dove for a play and I
jammed my shoulder on the ground and tore my labram.
So from that point on, I wasn't able to play
baseball anymore. Something I love to do, something that was
natural to me, something that was I was the first
one on the field, last one off, the thing that
was a driving passion for me. But because I responded
from a place of frustration, from a place of pain,
(05:00):
caused more wounding, more pain to myself than should have been.
I created this actual pain that's physical, that came from
an emotional thing. Now I tell this story often when
I talk about healing, because it not so much that pain. Yes,
that reality that I did something out of frustration and
(05:20):
that caused an even bigger problem. And sometimes we respond
from frustration, we respond from our hurt, and we cause
bigger issues. We don't think things through, so we end
up hurting ourselves because we're trying to prove something to
someone else. We're trying to throw it in their face.
We're trying to use our gifting, our talent things to
say to these people, Look, look what you missed out on,
(05:40):
and what you end up doing is hurting yourself more. Yes,
that's the reality. But I actually look at this from
the perspective of the therapy, because even though I didn't
get the surgery because Surgeron was apparently elective, I still
went through the therapy process. And the most pain that I've
ever felt was when I was trying to heal a
torn leap. We're trying to heal a muscle or trying
(06:02):
to heal a bone or something that's out of place
some long. When you are going through that therapy, the
thing that hurts the most is the actual therapy, is
the thing that is healing you, is the process of
you getting back to this place that you used to
be in, because that's the reality that healing actually hurts.
When we do the thing that was hurt with the
think that was wounded, this part of us that that
(06:25):
is causing this problem. The therapy itself is going to
be a process of pain because now you have to
revert to something that the muscle has been wounded in
and does is not used to doing it anymore. It's
it's scared because of obvious attention that was pain, obvious
things that are happening, but also the process of it
and knowing that you have to go and stretch and
(06:46):
move and do all these things that your shoulder and
it's got hurt and there has to be a process
of that. A lot of people are afraid of the process.
The reason that we don't heal is because we've become
comfortable with not actually living in that process us by
saying that, well, if I don't do this thing I
won't feel that pain. I won't have to address it.
I won't have to change it. If I don't have
to look at it, if I don't have to be
(07:07):
in it, then I don't have to remember what's happened.
For a lot of us, we're afraid of the therapy.
We're afraid of the thing that's going to heal us.
And we'll talk a little bit more about that after
this commercial break. So welcome back just this reality where
we struggle to heal because we are afraid to touch
the wound. We're afraid to go near the thing that's hurting,
(07:28):
we're afraid to do what we need to do in
that place. And again I use that therapy analogy that
just the movement of that. Now, it's always a tough
one when we come to this mountain of healing to
understand that this mountain in front of me is something
that is going to be challenging. And I love the
crazy that. I think this is such a great name
for a podcast because there is so much reality about mountains,
(07:51):
about the struggles we're facing them, about the things that
we're seeing, the adversity that's found within that thing. But
there is this beauty of excess. When you confront the
thing that you have made a mountain in your life
and actually overcome it. There is so much power in
that ability. And anyone that's ever done something difficult, anyone
(08:11):
that's ever had again, I'm a hiker, so I love it.
Anyone that's had those kind of hikes where it's like
you're in for hours and hours, but then you get
to that mountaintop, you see that view, You see the
thing that just was so worth the work. You don't
for you don't remember the suffering, like, yes, you know
that it costs you work, but the moment you're there,
it's just the satisfaction of completing that of challenging yourself
(08:35):
to this thing and doing something amazing. We have to
understand that there's this beauty that happens after, right, So
going through that therapy, going through that thing that addresses
the wound, that that says that this thing is there
and I'm not gonna shy away or deny it. Going
towards that this was going to change everything. It's understanding
this reality that I need to touch the wound for
(08:58):
it to be healed. I need to go and do
the therapy. I need to go and put myself through
the process of it. And that's what we're impacking here, right,
this reality that we need to go through this now.
The tough thing when we visit this one is that
healing isn't linear. It's not something that you do something
today and tomorrow another process and it's a straight line.
There are moments of shifting and there are moments and
(09:20):
seasons of it either feeling heavy or feeling light. Well,
us going through that reality. It's the reality that this
is a mountain, it's not a hill, right. So pace
is important, but it doesn't mean that you use pace
as an excuse. Like one thing that a lot of
people say is like, well, I'm in a healing stage,
so they use that quote unquote pace as an excuse
(09:42):
to not do anything. They'll say, well, yeah, this is
it takes time, you know, I'm right, or we're saying
that right now, right, But we're not taking time and
using time as a reason as to why you don't change.
We're not saying, oh, yeah, it takes time, so I'm
just gonna not do anything. It's understanding that there's a
pace and there's a step to it. It is forever
and for some people, they unpack there and they make
(10:03):
that home. But when you do that, you are now
giving that much more authority to the wound. You're now
giving that much more authority to the thing that this
shouldn't exist. So when we unpack this wound of healing,
we talk about healing this mountain of healing, We talk
about this reality that there are all these things that
are happening there. We need to first understand that grief
is a part of this, like mourning what could have been,
(10:25):
having that reality that you are no longer there. And
I think a lot of people, especially with like relationship wounds,
which seems to be like super common, and it is
super common because it makes sense our heart's desire to
love and to be loved. So it makes sense as
to why that wound is so strong and so prevalent,
because that is a wound that is common for a
(10:46):
lot of people. But it's a desire of our hearts.
So for a lot of us when it comes to
this reality, we don't allow ourselves to grieve what we
could have had. We don't allow ourselves to grieve the relationship.
We don't allow ourselves to grieve the story that we
made up in our mind that was there, so we
don't actually heal from it because we're still in this
(11:06):
denial of what's real. Like we are sitting through this
pain of grief without understanding that grief is a process
and it's not a process that again it doesn't happen overnight,
but it's something that we need to learn to identify
as we go along. Knowing that our brains believe this story.
You have to rewire your brain. You're knowing that you
(11:28):
have created this narrative, you created a future, you created
all these things in this particular situation, and now you
have to grieve the death of that. Now you have
to go through grief and understand that things is not there.
And the sad thing about grief is that it comes
in waves. And this is grief from everything, but again
from that particular mountain. Its relationships, but even grief like
(11:49):
in friendships, right, metical relationships or platonic friendships, those things.
Even with friendships, I don't think we talk enough about
the reality that it does hurt to lose a friendship.
It does hurt to sit here and realize that certain
people can't come into the next chapters of your life.
It hurts to sit and think that there are certain
people who you've seen and imagined in your life and
(12:11):
in the most sincere and soft ways possible, but knowing
that now these people no longer belong there. There's a
grief in letting those things go and healing from that,
because I know that we want those people there. There's
there's no situation where you see someone that you love
genuinely in your life and have so much respect for
(12:35):
or so much a moration for, and then have to
realize that they don't fit in this next stage, that
they're not a part of the thing that's supposed to
be healed in you. And I know letting that go
has to be harder than most relationships, right, more romantic relationships,
because that is a reality that's not something that you
ever saw. That you couldn't you couldn't have perceived that
(12:55):
thing being there. But sometimes we don't heal from those
things because we haven't allowed ourselves to fully grieve it
and bury it, to sit and realize that this thing
is no longer present and you don't have to bear
the weight on yourself. And I think this is so
important to understand that you don't have to bear the
weight on yourself or failed relationships, whether it's your family
(13:17):
members or romantic or platonic. What you don't have to
sit here and take on the whole load of what
that thing was, because healthy relationships require more than one person.
Like if this relationship would have been healthy, it would
have been something that you would have done with another person,
not just alone, because that's the point of a relationship,
right we were working together towards this thing. It doesn't
(13:40):
dismiss work, it doesn't dismiss hard times, it doesn't dismiss
these things that are going to come and happen, but
it does require two people to be a part of it.
If the relationship you have with those people, it's going
to require them. And if you're the only one in it,
I need to understand that you were freed from something.
For For a lot of us, we struggle with relationships
because we think we have to be the best person
(14:00):
possible forward to survive and you should be the best
effort of you. But if they can't help you and
support you in your bad stages, then that's not a
healthy relationship. That's a beneficial relationship when it's only beneficial
to them and I'm not saying, I'm not justifying bad
behavior and stupidity and all these things. I am saying, however,
that some people can't love you fully because they don't
love you in the worst versions of you. They only
(14:23):
love the ones the version of you that is beneficial
to them. What can I get from you? That's not
a healthy relationship? And knowing that, understanding that being able
to grieve the good things, and then realizing that you're
not the only one that has to bear the weight
allows you to see things from a clear point. We
need to understand that it's okay to grieve and to
let go that pain is a part of the healing process.
(14:46):
That the same way that we have to grow to
have growing pains is the same way that we have
to allow people to leave and to walk away and
to be where they need to be, so that we
can now detach from those things a myth right that
we have to get over it. There's this reality of
getting over it versus letting it be integrated into your life.
(15:07):
Healing isn't about forgetting or racing what happened. And I
think that's the biggest struggle that we think that as
we heal that we need to forget. And that's not
necessarily true, because it's hard to forget things. It's hard
to sit here and tell yourself that that's a lie
and rewire your brain. And all these things are the
things that you could do naturally, where you could do
by telling you, by again speaking and telling yourself this reality.
(15:29):
But forgetting doesn't mean that you're healed. Right, just because
you don't remember something doesn't mean it didn't happen. Just
because I don't remember the impact of the moment or
how I felt when I hurt my shoulder, it doesn't
mean that my shoulder isn't hurt. It exists. The pain
is real, and it's prevalent. But it doesn't mean that
you have to sit here and allow it to continue
(15:49):
to hold. Yes, you don't forget, because again, you're not
going to lose your memory, But you don't allow your
memory to dictate your emotions. You don't allow what's happened
to you to dictate the steps that you take. You
don't allow your past to be the reason why you
don't have a good and happy and fruitful future. I
think a lot of us are struggling with that component.
(16:11):
Right when we say this when we say healing, we
talk about moving on and growing. We think that we
have to somehow forget, that you have to erase the
memories of the things that have happened, that you have
to sit here and justify those things. That's not the case.
When you are healing. We are now adapting to the
places that we're in. So what I mean by that
(16:32):
is that, yes you don't forget, and yes you don't
let it control, but now you know certain things in
certain places and certain actions that you shouldn't take. The
biggest or the worst, I think the worst thing you
could ever do is have something happen to you and
you not learn from it, and you not grow from it,
you not take something from it. Why because at that
(16:52):
point that thing happened to you in vain like, if
you didn't learn something from that, there was no wisdom
for you in it, And wisdom them is exactly that.
It's understanding that these things have happened and then taking
the tools that've come out of it. Maybe it's how
you communicate, or maybe it's the fact that you no
longer deal with people in certain aspects, or you don't
sell yourself short in certain ways. It's when we take
(17:15):
something productive from it. It's about learning how to integrate
your story so it's no longer controlling your identity or
your future. It's not letting it be the reason why
you didn't do things. It's using it again as the
reason why you did. It's the catalyst to everything good
and productive and prooful. I think we fail to do
those things well because we've given ourselves this, this lie
(17:38):
that forgetting is just naturally going to happen, that we
are just going to one day wake up, happy, healed,
and forgotten of that whole situation. It's not it's also
not a realistic thing to expect. But learning to not
let the memories control the emotions. I think this is
the big takeaway from that. Not letting what happened control
(18:01):
what happens next. I've seen it so many times. I've
had this conversation with a lot of people, believe or not,
and it's a huge impact as to the productive, the
positive things that people move into. Because an example, without
giving too much information, I've had a friend who shared
with me once that their previous relationships have tainted completely
(18:24):
their view on the other sex. Right, They completely tainted
how they see people how they respond to the wayship.
They think that everything is a lie. So but the
way they see that is that they feel that the
emotions that the person is portraying, or the words that
they're saying, or the actions that they're taking is all
manipulative because in their mind, the people that they have
(18:45):
dealt with before have been so bad that it must
be everyone, and so they don't forget that component. They
think that this is just a natural thing with everyone else,
and it creeps into every relationship. And that's why they
have not had a successful relationship ever. If they've never grieved,
they've never let go, they never healed from this thing
that's happened to them before. So what they do is
(19:06):
that they transfer that over what there's a there's a
saying which, well, you don't transfer, you will transmit. Well,
you don't change, and you you will transmit into the
next thing. And if it's in relationships, the things that
you don't heal in you, you will see in the
next place. You will bring that into this next thing.
So what you're doing is that you're not dating new people.
You're just dating the same person in different bodies. You
(19:27):
are trying to fix and heal something you couldn't fix
and heal in someone else. And in these next things,
in these next stages and these next steps, you end
up hurting yourself so much more because you haven't healed
from a memory or from a wound from action of
a person that already impacted you, and now you are
trying to save them everywhere else. I need you to
understand that it is okay to let go of people.
(19:52):
I know, I know it hurts. I know this is
the hard part of forgetting and not letting them control
the narrative. I know that it's difficult to do and
it's easy to say, but you will live in the
same exact wound for the rest of your life because
you refuse to step into what's real. Not everyone is
the same, and there's certain things that we need to
(20:12):
address about that we'll do that after this commercial break
to take you first all even being here for this long,
and I know sometimes it's hard to hear a podcasts
and things that we need to address in us and
then actually take it in and actually do something with it.
But when we're talking about wounds and going back to
places and to people that we have given authority to
(20:34):
that is going to be the hardest level of accountability
we ever live. Why because you have to sit here
and say, what is it about me that is allowing
me to be in these situations again, that's causing me
this pain and the struggle and making me think it's
okay to just unpack there, to continuously be there, to
be present to that. The hardest part of all that
(20:55):
is accountability. I think knowing first that it's not that
I have to get over something, is that I have
to be accountable for the things that I'm letting it
in under me. I have to be accountable for the
things that I'm choosing to go back to or things
that I've made a ceiling or roadblock in my life,
because that is the thing that I haven't healed from.
(21:17):
And I need you to understand that your pain deserves
a seat at the table. Right it's not, But it
shouldn't be the head of it. Right. Yes, it deserves
a seat. It should be a part of the story.
It should be something you used to learn from the
wisdom that you got from it, something you use to
make your next decisions or your next steps, or the
next things you do. But it's not the thing that's
(21:38):
making and dictating all of your decisions. It shouldn't be
the thing that tells you what to do and what
not to do. We don't heal from these things because
we don't allow ourselves to understand what was good from it.
We just think that it is the whole thing that
we're stuck in. So we create this this balance, imbalance
rather and we never should grow. I know it hurts.
(22:03):
I know this is like one of those like, man,
I wish I didn't have to go through this. I
wish I didn't have to feel this pain. I wish
I didn't have to heal from this thing. But it's
the best thing that you will ever do, because the
reality is that everyone is going to hurt at some point.
There is something in us that we're gonna have to
heal from. And again, it's not always relationships. I just
(22:24):
think that's the easiest one and the most common one
and the one we hear the most and the most often.
But there's always gonna be something that we need to
heal from, whether it's a parental wound, or it's a
financial wound, a bad habit that I've picked up, whatever
it is, there's always going to be something that we
need to heal from. And when we learn to use
our pain and our grief and all these things as tools,
(22:48):
it changes how you respond to so many things. Now,
me personally, I've struggled with my own things. I struggle
with my own things now. I feel like one of
the hardest things is that, especially when you're creating this
of content where people think that you have to have
it all figured out, I don't. I feel like a
lot of I know what, I'm grateful for the things
that I don't have figured out, Like, I'm really grateful
(23:09):
for the pains and the struggles I have. Because again,
if you've heard any of my other episodes, you know
that for me, faith is a huge thing and it
allows me to be rooted in my humanity right and
know that I'm flawed and I'm broken and i make
mistakes and I'm still hurt and I'm still healing and
I'm still growing. But I've been able to see this
(23:30):
tool and that's why I honestly this I'm sure there's
gonna be more episodes specifically around this particular matter, because
it's one of my favorite things to talk about, because
I think that when we understand this, We become the
best versions of us when we understand that you are imperfect,
broken and flawed, that you know that you are not
this cookie cutter and everything is like exactly how it
(23:52):
should be. Person you're able to identify the things that
you can grow from and grow through, and it doesn't
become this lie about your life because you're not portraying perfection.
You're portraying reality. And I'm grateful for that. And again,
like I said, my favor is always been a big thing,
and it helps me just understand that that is something
in me that needs to be worked in. I don't
(24:12):
know where you are in your life. I don't know
where you're hearing this podcast from. I don't know what
part of your life you feel like you need to
grow or heal from. But I need you to understand
that even in your imperfection of it, there's beauty in it,
that there's purpose to the thing that's hurting you. Because
when we look at our pains, we know that we
can turn pain into actual purpose. And that's why that's
(24:33):
actually the slogan for this podcast. I think that's such
a good tagline because when you are able to identify pain,
you're able to identify what you can grow from and
what it can be used from. And I mentioned before
accountability being the biggest thing right when it comes to healing.
And the reason why accountability is so big is of one, yes,
(24:53):
one understand what role did I play in my wound?
And I think a lot of us run away from
that that we don't look at the things that have
happened to us. And in certain situations, right, there are
certain situations that that's out of your hand, out of
your control, But there are other situations where we are
a part of our own hurt, where we have to
be accountable for the things that we did or didn't
do right, and that we are a part of that
(25:14):
that thing. But why accountability is so big is because
it's our last point here is because healing is returning
to self trust. It's learning to trust you, it's learning
to trust that that intuition is learning to heal and
grow and know that I have enough power, enough autonomy
over myself to choose what's next. We struggle to heal
(25:36):
because we blame ourselves, like we why did why did
that happen? Or how could I be so dumb? And
I think this is such a big one, like so
many of us go through this reality where we we
will replace scenarios and sit in it and let that
thing become the defining moment in us. And today, today alone,
I did that myself. I will replace scenarios and sit
(25:56):
in it and let those things sit there. But the
difference is that the more I've grown in this, the
more I've been able to address that. And I want
to give you this tool. I think this is a
very important one. If you lasted this whole podcast episode,
this is the best part of it all. The tool
is this is being able to know what you're saying
and know what you're replaying, and knowing that you made
(26:20):
a mistake, and knowing that you feel dumb, and knowing
that you feel like this thing should have been avoided.
Knowing all those things and knowing that those things still
don't define you, Like knowing that your mistakes and your
flaws and that your shortcomings and where you fell short,
that those things are not who you are, and then
being able to say question it, being able to question
(26:40):
the reality of that, what kind of impact does that
actually have in my life? Like is this something that's
actually sustainable or is this something that I'm giving more
flame to you than it deserves. I think for a
lot of us we have that problem, like we let
our thoughts run rampant. And I know, as an overthinker myself,
that there are times where I look at those things
and I just let them grow, I let them fester.
(27:02):
I fan the flame of that because I make that
my thought. But the more you learn about this, the
more you address it, the more you say, listen, this
thing does not have power. I'm able to look at
this thing and know that, yes, I made a mistake,
but I'm not defined by it. And what we heal
When we learn to heal this, we learn to find
(27:22):
wisdom and the things that we've done. And it doesn't
mean that you're gonna be perfect tomorrow. Probably not. You're
gonna probably fail and fall quite a few times. But
when you're able to sit in this and say this
thing is not the end all be all, it's not
all the authority of who I am, you're able to
find the positive it and you're able to look at
the mistakes you made and say, well, let's not do
that again. Let's grow from this. What happens next. Healing
(27:46):
isn't linear. It doesn't mean that you are going to
be perfect tomorrow, doesn't mean that you're gonna have every
detail done, but it does mean that at some point
when you start caring for you, when you start doing
the things that hurt or going through the motion knowing
that there is hurt and healing, when you start actually
(28:07):
doing those things, you start giving yourself the best chance
to be the best version of you. You start identifying
these things in you that could just be catalysts as
a better life and not just a struggle as to
the thing you're in. I know that for a lot
of people there are so many things that are just
stumbling blocks. They're just in the way. And as we heal,
(28:31):
as we grow, as we change, as we make the
best version of us of reality. Because again that's the
whole hope and goal for this podcast. And yes, we
have episodes with other people and they tell us their
mountains and their struggles and the things they've gone through.
But my only hope with this podcast is what I've
seen happen before, where people receive even the smallest nugget
(28:52):
to help them be better people, to help them change,
to help them just be this productive person that they
can be and I address the lies that they've been
in because that's what's happening with a lot of us.
Whether you're hearing it from perfect or imperfect people. The
reality is that the truth is still the truth. And
when you address those things in you, you become the
best version of you. You are not stuck in the things.
(29:16):
Healing is not about you being perfect. Healing is not
about you having it all figured out. Healing is about
you challenging that thing that's telling you that you're not good.
You challenging that thing that's limiting your belief. I need
you to understand that you were made for that mountain,
and as we talk about healing and the process of it,
(29:38):
in the progress of it, you have the power and
the authority to do something amazing, not because anyone else
has said it, but because you deserve it. So thank
you so much for it, for being here, thank you
for your faithfulness in this. I know that healing isn't linear.
I know that you might not have it all figured
(29:58):
out right away, but the is going to be the
walk to walk through this together. So thank you for
being present, thank you for listening, and I'll see you
in the next one.
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