March 3, 2025 • 6 mins
They Don't Care- Why you shouldn't either.
The truth is that no one is going to do it for you. No one is going to care about you or your emotions. The only person you have, is you.
#motivation #selfworth #selflove
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
So the truth is that they might say a lot
of things, but at the end of it, at the
core of it, they don't care. People that care about you,
people that are generally trying to better you and trying
to do things with you, are going to show up
for you. They're going to be the ones that are
going to push and advocate and tell you to grow.
But I need we need to realize that at some point,
no one is going to show up for us. No
one is going to do the work, no one's going
to make us feel motivated, no one's going to be
(00:21):
consistent with us. Yes, you might have friends that desire
the best for you, you might have people in your
life that advise you well, but at the end of that,
no one is showing up for you. And unfortunately, the
reason we deal with so many struggles, when its relationships
or with ourselves or anything of that nature, is because
we think that someone is going to show up and
fix it, that they're going to care more than we do,
(00:42):
that they're going to be a part of it. And again,
we can go so many ways with that, but I
need you to focus on this reality that no one
is like you, no one has the same mindset. No
one speaks to you as much as you do. No
one shows up for the way you show up for you.
And when we stop putting our value and our worth
and our time in how other people show up for us,
we'll start realizing that the only people that can show
for us is us. So just looking at this, most
(01:05):
people are focused on themselves, like this is the reality
that we think that some people are gonna love us more,
care for us more when someone genuinely cares for you.
And this is different, right, because there's a different kind
of relationship when we talk about romantic or platonic relationships.
Romantic relationships, they should invest in you and you should
invest in them fully. Right, there should be a complete
mutual reciprocity, a mutual four where you're giving in to
(01:26):
them completely, where you're pouring completely in but they're also
pouring completely into you. If there's a situation where you're
pouring in completely and getting nothing back, you need to
realize that that is not a mutual for that is
a beneficial use. They are using you for something. They're
using you for an emotion, for a moment, for a time.
That's not beneficial to you. Now, when we talk platonic relationships.
You need to realize that most people are showing up
(01:47):
for themselves. Yes, they might love you, they might care
for you, but at the end of the day, the boat,
the lifeline is for them. They're caring about them. And
the reason that we get so wrapped up and trying
to convince people is because we think that people think
how we We think that people love how we love.
We think that people show up how we show up.
And if you're a giver, you need to realize that
not everyone is a giver. Some people are takers, and
we don't put ourselves first. We give authority to other
(02:11):
people to continue to take from us, to walk over us.
I don't mean don't love people. I don't mean don't
care for people. I don't mean don't show them that
they matter. But I mean understand that you cannot give
from an empty vessel. You cannot pour into other people.
If you yourself have been pouring out for so long
that you have nothing left in you, all that's gonna
do is build resentment. All that's gonna do is build hate.
And people are always gonna show up for themselves. But
(02:33):
the question is are you showing up for you. Are
you loving you enough? Are you making you a priority
so much so that you stop letting people that treat
you less continue to win? Are you making you the
best version of you? Because if you're not, you're gonna
consistently be in the cycle of just begging people for
the bare minimums or the bread combs. You need to
realize that most people are focused on themselves. They're showing
up for them, they're making themselves a priority, and if
(02:55):
you're not doing that for yourself, you're gonna be stuck
in that Not everyone loves how you love. Not everyone's
gonna show up for people how you show for you,
and everyone's gonna care for people. And I need to
understand that's okay. It is beautiful that you give. It
is beautiful, that is a desire from you. But I
need you to understand that just because you are that
way doesn't mean you need to be that way with everyone.
Doesn't mean that you have to consistently pour out into
(03:16):
people that continue to take from you. Loving is great,
it's good that that's the way you show affection. It's
good that's the way you care. But if you have
to consistently be the only person that pours into people,
you are gonna again be the most miserable. They don't
care about it. They don't care that you do these things,
and you could do these things, but it needs to
be in moderation and in control. When you overpour and overgive,
you're making sure that you're empty and not giving to
(03:38):
the people that deserve it, not giving to the people
that are giving back to you. Unfortunately, we think that
if we pour more into people that will make them
better people. It won't. It will just dilute you. Your
love gets diluted in a place that it doesn't belong
because it's not supposed to be there, And when they
take and use, you are empty and alone because you gave.
No one is gonna fix your piece. And this is
a big takeaway because we tend to think that again,
(04:00):
if we show up more of we are around people,
more of a give up of ourselves, more that they're
going to make us feel better, and by that train
of thought that by them making us feel better, that
we then find more peace in ourselves. But the truth
is that you don't. It is impossible to find peace
in the place that's joyless. It's impossible to find peace
in something that you have to consistently diminish yourself to
be it. It's impossible to find peace in something that
(04:22):
you know is not serving you or for you, but
just because you think it looks right or sounds right,
that you are just making yourself small to fit into it.
There is no peace in a place that is not
for you. And that's the hardest takeaway that we have
to realize. And even though we think and envision and
hope that it would be, the reality is that it
isn't because you're not giving the things you need to
succeed in it. You're not helped, you're not growing, You're stuck.
(04:45):
And if you consistently go in this circle of being stuck,
that's all you ever be. There's no peace there and
they're not going to fix it for you. Our last
point here is that you have to find your own motivation.
Like you can't depend on people to motivate. You can't
depend on people to grow, You can't depend on people
to serve you, to be with you, to help you.
You can't depend on people to see what they can't
see because they don't have your vision. They were not
(05:06):
given the foresight that you have. They don't understand what
you were made for. But you can't depend on people
to be your motivation. You can't depend on the approval
of people, the love of people, and the people showing
up for you. At the end of the day, you
need to show up for you because they don't care. Yes,
they might have some vested interest in you, but at
the reality of this that at the core, the only
person that has the full vested interest is you. You're
(05:28):
the only one that's gonna either cry or laugh off
the decisions you make. There's either gonna be joy for
your family or pain for your family based on the
things that you do. At the end of the day,
of the end of this time, the only person that
has his authority is you, and the only person that's
gonna be their motivation is you. But if you continue
to think that somebody is going to look at you
(05:49):
and approve of you and love you and give you
what you need, you're gonna consistently pour into places that
don't serve you. Yes, there's again, romantic is very different
than platonic and secular relationship in the world relationships, but
we need to realize no one is going to show
up for you and the hardest lesson that you will
ever learn, but the greatest one that you ever learned
(06:10):
is that you have to do it for you. You
have to do it because you're in competition with you.
You have to do it because you want to be
the best version of you for you, not for anyone else.
So you need to find your own motivation because they
don't care.
So the truth is that they might say a lot
of things, but at the end of it, at the
core of it, they don't care. People that care about you,
people that are generally trying to better you and trying
to do things with you, are going to show up
for you. They're going to be the ones that are
going to push and advocate and tell you to grow.
But I need we need to realize that at some point,
no one is going to show up for us. No
one is going to do the work, no one's going
to make us feel motivated, no one's going to be
(00:21):
consistent with us. Yes, you might have friends that desire
the best for you, you might have people in your
life that advise you well, but at the end of that,
no one is showing up for you. And unfortunately, the
reason we deal with so many struggles, when its relationships
or with ourselves or anything of that nature, is because
we think that someone is going to show up and
fix it, that they're going to care more than we do,
(00:42):
that they're going to be a part of it. And again,
we can go so many ways with that, but I
need you to focus on this reality that no one
is like you, no one has the same mindset. No
one speaks to you as much as you do. No
one shows up for the way you show up for you.
And when we stop putting our value and our worth
and our time in how other people show up for us,
we'll start realizing that the only people that can show
for us is us. So just looking at this, most
(01:05):
people are focused on themselves, like this is the reality
that we think that some people are gonna love us more,
care for us more when someone genuinely cares for you.
And this is different, right, because there's a different kind
of relationship when we talk about romantic or platonic relationships.
Romantic relationships, they should invest in you and you should
invest in them fully. Right, there should be a complete
mutual reciprocity, a mutual four where you're giving in to
(01:26):
them completely, where you're pouring completely in but they're also
pouring completely into you. If there's a situation where you're
pouring in completely and getting nothing back, you need to
realize that that is not a mutual for that is
a beneficial use. They are using you for something. They're
using you for an emotion, for a moment, for a time.
That's not beneficial to you. Now, when we talk platonic relationships.
You need to realize that most people are showing up
(01:47):
for themselves. Yes, they might love you, they might care
for you, but at the end of the day, the boat,
the lifeline is for them. They're caring about them. And
the reason that we get so wrapped up and trying
to convince people is because we think that people think
how we We think that people love how we love.
We think that people show up how we show up.
And if you're a giver, you need to realize that
not everyone is a giver. Some people are takers, and
we don't put ourselves first. We give authority to other
(02:11):
people to continue to take from us, to walk over us.
I don't mean don't love people. I don't mean don't
care for people. I don't mean don't show them that
they matter. But I mean understand that you cannot give
from an empty vessel. You cannot pour into other people.
If you yourself have been pouring out for so long
that you have nothing left in you, all that's gonna
do is build resentment. All that's gonna do is build hate.
And people are always gonna show up for themselves. But
(02:33):
the question is are you showing up for you. Are
you loving you enough? Are you making you a priority
so much so that you stop letting people that treat
you less continue to win? Are you making you the
best version of you? Because if you're not, you're gonna
consistently be in the cycle of just begging people for
the bare minimums or the bread combs. You need to
realize that most people are focused on themselves. They're showing
up for them, they're making themselves a priority, and if
(02:55):
you're not doing that for yourself, you're gonna be stuck
in that Not everyone loves how you love. Not everyone's
gonna show up for people how you show for you,
and everyone's gonna care for people. And I need to
understand that's okay. It is beautiful that you give. It
is beautiful, that is a desire from you. But I
need you to understand that just because you are that
way doesn't mean you need to be that way with everyone.
Doesn't mean that you have to consistently pour out into
(03:16):
people that continue to take from you. Loving is great,
it's good that that's the way you show affection. It's
good that's the way you care. But if you have
to consistently be the only person that pours into people,
you are gonna again be the most miserable. They don't
care about it. They don't care that you do these things,
and you could do these things, but it needs to
be in moderation and in control. When you overpour and overgive,
you're making sure that you're empty and not giving to
(03:38):
the people that deserve it, not giving to the people
that are giving back to you. Unfortunately, we think that
if we pour more into people that will make them
better people. It won't. It will just dilute you. Your
love gets diluted in a place that it doesn't belong
because it's not supposed to be there, And when they
take and use, you are empty and alone because you gave.
No one is gonna fix your piece. And this is
a big takeaway because we tend to think that again,
(04:00):
if we show up more of we are around people,
more of a give up of ourselves, more that they're
going to make us feel better, and by that train
of thought that by them making us feel better, that
we then find more peace in ourselves. But the truth
is that you don't. It is impossible to find peace
in the place that's joyless. It's impossible to find peace
in something that you have to consistently diminish yourself to
be it. It's impossible to find peace in something that
(04:22):
you know is not serving you or for you, but
just because you think it looks right or sounds right,
that you are just making yourself small to fit into it.
There is no peace in a place that is not
for you. And that's the hardest takeaway that we have
to realize. And even though we think and envision and
hope that it would be, the reality is that it
isn't because you're not giving the things you need to
succeed in it. You're not helped, you're not growing, You're stuck.
(04:45):
And if you consistently go in this circle of being stuck,
that's all you ever be. There's no peace there and
they're not going to fix it for you. Our last
point here is that you have to find your own motivation.
Like you can't depend on people to motivate. You can't
depend on people to grow, You can't depend on people
to serve you, to be with you, to help you.
You can't depend on people to see what they can't
see because they don't have your vision. They were not
(05:06):
given the foresight that you have. They don't understand what
you were made for. But you can't depend on people
to be your motivation. You can't depend on the approval
of people, the love of people, and the people showing
up for you. At the end of the day, you
need to show up for you because they don't care. Yes,
they might have some vested interest in you, but at
the reality of this that at the core, the only
person that has the full vested interest is you. You're
(05:28):
the only one that's gonna either cry or laugh off
the decisions you make. There's either gonna be joy for
your family or pain for your family based on the
things that you do. At the end of the day,
of the end of this time, the only person that
has his authority is you, and the only person that's
gonna be their motivation is you. But if you continue
to think that somebody is going to look at you
(05:49):
and approve of you and love you and give you
what you need, you're gonna consistently pour into places that
don't serve you. Yes, there's again, romantic is very different
than platonic and secular relationship in the world relationships, but
we need to realize no one is going to show
up for you and the hardest lesson that you will
ever learn, but the greatest one that you ever learned
(06:10):
is that you have to do it for you. You
have to do it because you're in competition with you.
You have to do it because you want to be
the best version of you for you, not for anyone else.
So you need to find your own motivation because they
don't care.
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