May 22, 2025 • 29 mins
Ever felt like passion is something you’re supposed to find but it never shows up? In this powerful episode, Joshua Rosa breaks down the truth: passion isn’t found, it’s built. From stepping on a nail as a kid to uncovering what science says about desire and motivation, this episode will challenge everything you thought you knew about purpose.
- Why you feel stuck or unmotivated
- The real reason you haven’t “found” your passion
- Science-backed habits that help build intrinsic motivation
- How to align your actions with the life you want
- What to do when passion fades or life gets hard
If you're tired of waiting for your purpose to arrive, this is your sign to build it from the ground up. Let’s climb the mountain of who you are vs. who you’re meant to be.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Sometimes we desire things so much so that even though
they hurt us and go against what's natural for us
and they don't actually serve the greater purpose in our life,
we tend to do that thing because we think it's
what we need to do, because we've spent so much
time feeling in it, that we stay in that same path.
I invested Sunky cost fatacy. I invested so much time
in this thing, and this thing doesn't pay off or
(00:22):
doesn't love me back, but I'm going to continue to
stay in it. This is made for this mountain with
Josh Rosa or turning pain into purpose. So when I
was a kid, I played baseball like every good Dominican
boy does. And I remember one day I was actually
in my grandmother's house and I was a backyard and
I had a baseball game literally a block away.
Speaker 2 (00:41):
But I was early.
Speaker 1 (00:42):
I'm super punctual for everything. I am the worst or
best Dominican I road. I don't know how to play
that one because I'm super punctual. I'm like thirty minutes
ahead of time for everything. And anyone knows that Dominican
knows that that's not really cultural with us, But for
me at the very least. I'm very punctual, so I'm
super early. So I decided I was going to hang
out and just do whatever. A twelve old kid was
doing a backyard, and I decided to go to the
back of the yard and go through the back of
(01:05):
the garage. And as I'm walking there, I didn't notice
that there was a plank that had a nail hit
right through the plank. So I decided, as was walking
in to step on this wonderful nail. Obviously it wasn't
a choice, it just happened. But when I stepped on
this nail, it went right through my foot, and I
remember the scruciating pain to this day. This was like
(01:25):
like twenty years ago into this day. I still get
like little phantom pains of that, and I remember the
struggle of that, how much blood there was. So what
I did, knowing that I had a game thirty minutes,
knowing that I was pitching that day, I decided that
I was gonna wrap my foot up and just go
and finish the go play the game. So I go
and I started playing the game, and about three innings in,
(01:46):
the coach kind of notices that I'm still limping. He's
like didn't think much of it, but you notice that
my foot was like really really big, like swollen to
the point where I was trying to move the shoe around.
And he comes to the mountain. He looks at me,
He says, why what happened? Why are you bleeding? Why
is there so much blood? And I told them, well,
I stepped on the nail, but I came to the
game anyway. I tell that story often because sometimes it's
the reality of desire versus pain, Like there's this thought
(02:10):
that we want to do something and we are willing
to suffer through it. But it doesn't always mean that
you should suffer just because you desire it, like me
wanting to be a part of that game. In retrospect
as an adult, it sounds stupid. It sounds like it
there was a dumb thing to do, right, There was
no point for me to go through that pain, to
bleed the way I was bleeding, an efforts to play
something that really didn't have much of a significance in
(02:32):
the greater role of my life. But I was in
that situation, in that moment, and I thought that that
was the best option, and that Praise God, they God,
it's not like I didn't have to lose my foot right,
It wasn't aputated. They just they gave me a shot
right and helped me heal from that.
Speaker 2 (02:47):
But it could have been so much worse.
Speaker 1 (02:50):
And I decided to put pain down and just swallow
the pain so that I could be in something that
I desired in that moment, even though there was no
point to say. It's a bigger message here, and I
need you to listen to it. Sometimes we desire things
so much so that even though they hurt us and
go against what's natural for us and they don't actually
serve the greater purpose in our life, we tend to
(03:11):
do that thing because we think it's what we need
to do, because we've spent somost so much time feeling
in it that we stay in that same path. I
invested Sunky cost fat icy. I invested so much time
in this thing, and this thing doesn't pay off or
doesn't love me back, but I'm going to continue to
stay in it. Yes, it hurt to be in it,
but you didn't need to remain and make the pain worse.
Speaker 2 (03:32):
You didn't need to.
Speaker 1 (03:32):
Stay in that or pitch that game that you could
have played another one you didn't need to be in
something knowing that you were actively hurt and actively bleeding.
And for a lot of us we think that that's
what it is for us, like we need to remain
in this. We were confusing passion with pain. We think
that our passion should hurt. To be sure, to be clear,
(03:53):
yes it can hurt, Yes it's a part of it.
Speaker 2 (03:55):
Yes growth has growth.
Speaker 1 (03:56):
Pains, But it doesn't mean that you have to hurt
to go through something. It doesn't mean that you have
to be in it. That if there's pain, isn't there
that whole saying, no pain, no gain. Sometimes the pain
shouldn't be to the point of killing you, It shouldn't
be to the point where you're miserable. Sometimes the pain
is just simply this small aspect of change that's gonna
come from your work and your ethic. But for a
(04:19):
lot of us, culturally, we've conditioned our passion to be
tied into the sacrifice that outweighs. What it really is
is desire versus passion. It is really there. That pain
is something that we keep replaying and staying. And science
actually gives you a definition for passion, and that I
had to write this down because it's good. Science views
(04:40):
passion as a strong inclination towards a self defining activity
that a person finds enjoyable, important, and invests time and
energy in. It's a developed trait, not something inherently possessed,
often emerging the curiosity engagement. It's positive experience, an acknowledging acquisition.
(05:02):
So here's the thing. Yes, passion can cost you something,
but it's also something that.
Speaker 2 (05:08):
You build out of.
Speaker 1 (05:09):
It's something you grow. Yes, there's a level of pain.
I'm not dismissing that. There isn't pain and passion that
there isn't pain in growth, There isn't this possibility of that.
I'm not dismissing that because that's a part of it.
Speaker 2 (05:18):
Right.
Speaker 1 (05:18):
Sometimes we think that the things that we want to
just fall in our lab No, they should. You have
to work for, you have to be a part of it.
But if you want to develop passion, if you want
to know what you're made for, if you want to
know how to gravitate those towards those things, it's first
starting with something that you're learning. Yes, there might be
things that are natural to you, Like I'm a natural speaker.
I love to talk that's the thing. Well, in certain situations,
(05:39):
I'm actually very introverted. I'm good in front of the camera,
I'm good on air, I'm good in front of a
stage of people, but around other people, I'm just socially awkward,
like do you like cheese? Like I don't know what
to talk about. So for me, that's actually a learned thing,
learned to be in front of other people. Yes, it
stems from something that I'm naturally good at, but it's
something that I didn't inherently have.
Speaker 2 (06:00):
I had to learn.
Speaker 1 (06:01):
There are people that are very good with the one
on one conversations, They're amazing at those things, but these
are things that we have to develop. So yes, there's
a level of pain. I don't want to dismiss that.
That's the reality. But sometimes we are hurting ourselves over
hurting ourselves thinking that it's producing something positive in us.
And I always equate this to.
Speaker 2 (06:17):
The oyster thing.
Speaker 1 (06:18):
I heard this a couple of years ago, and there's
so much beauty in it that oysters when they produce
the pearls. When oysters produce pearls, there's a system called
macharie that they go through. So what happens is that
there's a wound inside of the oyster. And as this
wound that salt comes into this wound. It now produces
this callous over it that now produces a pearl. There
(06:39):
is beauty that comes out of the pain. There's beauty
that comes out of that thing. But you are not
an oyster. You shouldn't feel like you have to consistently
be hurt for their beauty to be existent. You don't
have to go through this process of this to sit
here and figure out what your purpose is or even
it just ties to everything, right, even relationships with people.
Sometimes we feel like we have to allow ourselves to
be hurt because it's a part of a relationship.
Speaker 2 (07:02):
No, it's not.
Speaker 1 (07:03):
Yes, does it happen absolutely, But is it an intrinsic
part that should be happening naturally? You always know it isn't.
It's something that's a byproduct of a situation, not something
that you should bear and consistently stay and thinking. And
that's natural. It's not learning to define the pain that's purposeful,
that's good inside me, finding passion, that's a huge one.
(07:23):
Being able to define that one thing is going to
change that aspect, and that's what we want to do.
After this commercial break, we're going to dive into that
and actually define what passion.
Speaker 2 (07:32):
Looks like for you. So we'll be right back, So
welcome back.
Speaker 1 (07:36):
The mountain of who you are versus who you can
be will come down to what you believe, but even
more to the small things you actually do. When we're
looking at this mountain of passion, of knowing how to
develop that, how to grow in that, or we see
this possibility of who we are, what we can be,
what we can do when we sit and actually unpack
(07:56):
this reality, it's going to come down to the small
things that we do as we develop passion. As we
could write, like you said before, it's it's sometimes it's
not something that's just naturally to you. It's something that's
by practice, by acquisition of knowledge, by growth, these things
that you consicily did through to develop your passion. It's
not something that's it's going to be a big, grandiose act.
(08:17):
It's sometimes it's a very small forward stepping thing. It's
it's a progress that you're making through. It's the next
stages and the next steps that you're taking. That's our
first aspect to that. The reality that we need to
do the small things well. And often there's a mother
Teresa of Cacutta, which I'm sure so many people heard of.
She says, do the small things with great love, the
(08:38):
little things that you do that you really really love,
the things that you really live in, the things that
you that you grow in that don't have to be
this again grandiose, super loud and super expressive thing. But
it's this small, detailed thing, this thing that you put
so much work into consistently, this little effort that's what's
going to change is mountain. I think sometimes when we
talk about mountains, people think that they need to destroy
(09:00):
the whole thing. Sometimes what you need to do is
chip away at it. It's this possibility of growth through effort.
So the little things that you do are gonna be
the ultimate factor of what you grow on. You make
this like ladder based on small effort, small things. I
say this often and I will die on this one.
(09:20):
You can't say that you have a big dream without
little effort like these little efforts, These little things are
the things that make up the next level, the next prad,
the next stage, and it has to be this growth
in there. So how do you cultivate passion instead.
Speaker 2 (09:33):
Of just waiting for it.
Speaker 1 (09:34):
Like, it's not how do you actually make this progress?
Speaker 2 (09:36):
Well, we have a lot of factors to.
Speaker 1 (09:38):
This, but firstly we need to line up what we
actually want and contrast it versus.
Speaker 2 (09:42):
What we're actually doing.
Speaker 1 (09:44):
A lot of people want all these things, but they're
not doing the things that are coming up.
Speaker 2 (09:48):
Part of it.
Speaker 1 (09:48):
Again, I mention this because I'm actually gonna go to
the gym after I'm doing this. I'm really putting in
the work and I'm trying. Guys, we're making this happen.
But I can't say that I desire to be fit,
or to be able to lift a certain amount of weight,
or be able to run a certain timeframe or do
whatever it is, and I'm not doing the very small
minimum thing of just showing up in the place that
I can develop that in. Like i can't say I
(10:09):
want this next stage, but I'm not doing the bare
minimum of what that stage looks like. A lot of
people have dreams, they have hopes, but you have to
contrast what you're doing versus what you're saying. And there
is this quote that I heard once and I.
Speaker 2 (10:23):
Often live by too.
Speaker 1 (10:24):
It's that if people couldn't hear your voice, Like, if
they couldn't hear the things you were saying, would they
believe that you want to be what you want to
be based on the actions you're taking. If they saw you,
they saw the things you were doing but couldn't hear
or we're not convinced.
Speaker 2 (10:38):
By who you are.
Speaker 1 (10:39):
If they saw the actions, would they say that those
are actions of a person that desires that thing and
whatever that thing is, right, it doesn't matter what it is, fitness, right,
it could be are you doing the work, are you
working out relationships? Are you caring for your partner or finances?
Are you saying that you're saving and working on these things?
All these things are huge and vital, but they start
with the little things. They start with the progress of
(11:01):
making that little effort and then saying, does this aligning
with this thing that I'm hoping? Am I actually doing
the things? And for a lot of people that stops
because they're living and staying in their limiting beliefs. They're
mountain is the limited thing that they think they're capable
of doing. You have to address that in cultivating this
(11:21):
and growing your passion and actually living in your passion
you have to sit down with you and maybe a
paper and a pencil or maybe even a camera. I
think we live in an age where we have so
much technology, we might as well use it for the
things that are going to progress us, the things are
going to make us better. But really sitting down with
you and saying, what's that limited belief, Like, what's that
mountain in my life that's telling me that I'm not
capable of doing this thing? And why do I believe that?
(11:44):
And if you really unpack this, right, if we really
sit with this reality and think, why am I not
capable of doing this?
Speaker 2 (11:49):
For a lot of us, it actually.
Speaker 1 (11:50):
Stems to things that have been said or done to
us in our past. And yes, of course everyone always
goes to the parental wounds. Of course that's a thing
that is a thing that could be a part of it,
but it's not the only think. Sometimes we have allowed
the environment that we've grown up and the people that
we've been around. There's a in sociology, there's a theory
called a broken window theory, right where the environment that
you were raised in to the theory is that it
(12:13):
would impact the life that you live. The next thing
that you do and I agree with that to an extent.
I think that that is reality. That is a true
statement that there is is reality, that the things that
you are around are going to impact that. Why because
it comes back to this limiting belief. I think that
if I was born in nothing, that I'm destined to
be nothing and the people that are around me are
(12:33):
always going to be that factor, always going to be
that limiting ceiling as to what I can do. And
I need you to understand that you are only limited
by what you believe. You're limited by like the thing
that is stopping you from being the best version of you,
this version of you that is happy, joyful, successful, fruitful,
This version of you is only limited by the person
that you told it it could never be, which is you.
(12:54):
And there's always going to be this contrast of who
you have to fight, because everything in life there's a fight. Yes,
I mentioned earlier that pain is not always necessarily that
this is the catalyst for purpose, but I also mentioned
that there's a reality. There is a level of it.
There's levels that we put ourselves in, and there's levels
that we force upon us thinking that that's how we.
Speaker 2 (13:15):
Get to it.
Speaker 1 (13:15):
But there's also the reality, there's just levels of things
that you have to work through and grow through. And
the limiting belief that you give yourself is going to
cost you that conversation. You're going to have to address
that and say, what's this thing that's stopping me from
being that? Is it really my environment or is it
the belief that my environment can didicate that?
Speaker 2 (13:32):
Is it the.
Speaker 1 (13:33):
Belief that I'm not worth It is the belief that
the people around me have always told me that this
is what I am. So my purpose is tied into
what they've said. Yes, is it true that you have
to deal with this and come and confront it. Absolutely,
But it's also true that this should not define you.
It should not be the end all be all for you.
You have to really come to this reality is who
told you you couldn't? Who made you question that this
(13:56):
is limited to you? And I need you to question
the question. I Again, I come from a background of faith,
and one thing that I speak about often, especially when
we talk about like yeah to me, even the garden,
all these things, I think the biggest deception that the
enemy has ever created, the levels were created in humans.
Whether you believe in this or not. Again, just so
much philosophy behind this, so much meat behind this that
(14:18):
whether it's faith based for you or not, this is
a very important question you need to ask yourself because
in the garden, Eve makes uh. The serpent makes Eve
question right, she makes some question. She doesn't doesn't deny, it,
doesn't say anything. He makes me question the truth. And
that's that's what happens with a lot of us, that
the snake in our ear makes us question what is
real for me? What is true for me? What's actually
(14:41):
good for me?
Speaker 2 (14:41):
Like?
Speaker 1 (14:41):
Am I doing the thing that's most purposeful in my life?
Is it align aligning with my passion? Or is that
snake in my ear making me question my ability? Is
it telling me that I can't do this? Is telling
me that I'm not capable of growth in this progress.
I need you to question the question. I need you
to sit there and analyze this, saying that that's that's
sitting with you, this thing that's not letting you get
(15:01):
through this mountain, this thing is limiting you to the
small step of who you can fully be, and question
why is there an actual reason for this? Or am
I sitting here and just replaying lies that I've been
told about me or lies that I've believed about me
for so long that I.
Speaker 2 (15:18):
Don't question it. I just believe it. And here's the beauty.
Speaker 1 (15:21):
Right, Let's say that there is something real, like there's
something substantial and big in your life that's stopping you
from being this fruitful and purpose for you. Let's just
take that for a second. If you sat with this,
if you really sat with this reality and saw that
now you're actually exposing it so that you can't address it,
so that you can't change it. But for most of us,
(15:42):
our reality is always going to be that we have
limited ourselves to the things that we think we're limited to.
We haven't questioned the question, We've just accepted it as
our reality. So you haven't developed passion because you think
that your passion is too great for you. You think
that the thing that you want to do is outside
of the realm of real of what you're capable of doing.
And you've limited the actions that you take next because
(16:04):
someone told you that you couldn't, because you keep telling
you that you can't, because you believe that the things
around you are going to go against you and not
for you. I need you to question the question. I
need you to sit here and really really just look
at this thing that's lied to you, and stop letting
it lie to you, stop letting your passion be limited.
Speaker 2 (16:26):
By a lie.
Speaker 1 (16:27):
For a lot of people, we have stopped the growth
in our lives because we don't think we're capable. And
I'll be completely vulnerable with you. I've done that myself.
There's been so many times where I've seen the growth
and seen all this amazingness that's been happening around me,
and I've stopped myself from thinking that I am deserving
of it. I stop myself from sitting here and thinking.
And I want to be clear. It doesn't mean that
(16:48):
you're arrogant and you're you know, you're bougie and you're like, oh,
I deserve everything. But I need you to also be
confident in loving in you so much so that you
say you do deserve things. You do deserve the progress
of the work that you've put in. You do deserve
the growth of the things that you're trying. You do
deserve the goodness of this world. And as much as
you keep believing the lie, when you start speaking into it,
(17:09):
when you start questioning the question, it changes the perspective
of the power that question has when you say is
this true or is this something that I'm just sitting with?
It changes that for you to live in your passion
and know what passion actually is and build out passion
because it's gonna again, it's gonna be something that requires
effort and work. You are going to have to repeat
and learn, and you're gonna have to fail and hurt,
(17:31):
and these things are all gonna have to be a
byproduct of you questioning the question because the moments you
hit a wall, if you don't question the question, you're
gonna believe that that wall is your limit. You're gonna
think that this thing that I've been limited to is real,
and that's where the pain is gonna be overbearing. You're
gonna sit with pain thinking, well, this pain is normal
and it's a part of the thing for me to
learn my lesson. I need you to wake up and
(17:53):
realize that your passion is not limited to what you've
been around, or who you've been around, or what you're
in or what' you're you've been in, or even the
mistakes you made yesterday. Those things are not in tomorrow.
They're not in today. I need you to question the question.
We develop our passion by knowing that, and then we
develop our passion by the habits that we create. It's
(18:16):
creating intrinsic motion, natural motion to what we want. The
vision of who you can be and what they do.
I need you to make that the forefront of everything.
The vision of my potential, that person that I want
to be, and all the actions that they take in
their day. What are the things that they do, how
do they live their life? What is the thing that
drives the catalyst as to why they do the next step,
(18:38):
because again this takes us very really back to what
we said. We can't be the person that we know
we can be without knowing the things that they would do,
without knowing how do they live their day, without knowing
how they respond to people, without knowing the version of that.
So as you sit down with this, I want you
to sit down with that version of you. And in fact,
let's make this step even further. Let's make this that
(19:00):
when you are sitting with that version of you, envision
this person of you that you can be and take
their advice. Do what they're saying, do what they did,
what you think would be the path to that, because
the reality is that we all know this, We know
what that person looks like, we know what that version
of us is, and we just don't sit with this
because we think that it's impossible. We've limited that vision
(19:23):
just to that wall. We limited that vision to that
lie in our ear. We limited that vision to everything
else that's around us because it doesn't seem real, like,
it doesn't seem achievable, because it's easier to believe that
you are not worth it than it is to believe
that you can make this work. And I need you
to understand that that version of you exists, like we
(19:44):
always compared to the Marvel multiverse, there is a version
of you out there that is the best possible version
of you. And that version of you has some great
advice for you. And we're actually going to dive in
a little bit deeper right after this commercial break. So
now that you know that there's a version of there,
now you know that there's a thought of that actually existing,
Now that you know that there is a reality and
(20:05):
a possibility that there is something out there similar to that,
sitting down with what you think, what you believe, what
you hope that person can look like is going to
be huge why because you're able to pick your own
brain right sit there and actually, now here's the thing. Okay,
of course, first of all, just the reality is that
you can't do this right and you know those things.
But if you don't do the steps, this is where
we're gonna fall apart. This is where we're We're not
(20:26):
gonna go back to the first portion of this because
when you don't do the things that you have to do,
you'll be stuck with the things that you were forced
to be stuck with. When you don't sit here and say, okay,
future version of me, what would you do on this day,
this day, this day, What does your daily routine look like?
What are the goals that you had on this month
and this here? What did you allow people to say
(20:47):
or doude you when you don't sit with these things,
when you don't ask that version of you that when
and then you don't do the things that that version
of you says, then you're not trying to be that
version of you. You just know that version of you
can't exist. And I think that's more painful than being
able to take the little steps now to do the
things that version would actually do, than it is to
sit here and know that it exists and I just
(21:09):
didn't want to do it. The vision of you of
what they would do is going to change so much.
It's gonna be the catalyst of what reality you have.
Because again, yes, it's fun to say, like the multiverse
thing and thing of that person's out there, But the
truth is that that person is you, Like that dream,
the person that you have, that that speaks to people
(21:29):
the way you speak, that stands up for themselves, the
way you stand up, that that does the work, that
wakes up every day, that chooses the best options for you.
That person is you. You are there, You know what
that person would do, and being able to sit here
and confront yourself is going to be the biggest factor.
And that's hard for some of us, for a lot
of us, most of us, I'll say, it's hard to
(21:51):
confront myself and say what I'm doing wrong because it's
easier to just flow with the current of the mess
of my life, like I have to get up and
do something that's hard. That's a tough thing to swallow
and to be in. And our last section here is
why are you passionless? Like what is it about you?
(22:11):
And maybe you have some level of passion. Maybe there's
something that you are dreaming for and aiming to achieve
and you're just struggling with this next step there. But
I need you to understand that passion is not about success.
It's about movement, like knowing that I don't have to
have it figured out perfectly, knowing that I don't have
to have all the answers today, knowing that I don't
(22:33):
have to be a superstar tomorrow. I simply get to
the ability and the presence to be. That's actual passion.
It's not about success. It's about doing the thing that
I know is going to serve my heart. The best
thing that I know that I'm going to love. Growing
in passion is being able to do that. Now. Again,
is success a byproduct? Absolutely, If you're doing something you
(22:54):
really love and you do it really well and you
grow in it, success is going to exist in terms of,
you know, the understanding of success. But it shouldn't be
the goal. You shouldn't sit here and say, well, I
use this often. I say this a lot too. With
content creators. I say you should not make content because
you want people to like your content, because at that
point you're not creating content for yourself, you're creating it
(23:17):
for approval, and the moment that people don't approve of
your content, then you think that it's worthless and pointless,
and then you'll stop. There is no passion behind it
because you're conflating passion with success. You think that these
two things are mutually exclusive, and they're not. Yes, this
is a byproduct. Yes you can get success from it.
(23:37):
Yes you can grow from that. Yes you can do
these things, but you cannot base your metric of passion
on how many people.
Speaker 2 (23:46):
Approve of your passion.
Speaker 1 (23:48):
Listen, If your passion is I don't know, balloon folding like,
if that's what you love, if that's the thing that
draws you to be the best version of you, that's
where your passion is, then so be. I promise you
there is a niche out there of people who love
that art form, who love that thing that you do,
who are who are seeing that and thinking, wow, you
(24:09):
are so amazing.
Speaker 2 (24:10):
Do this.
Speaker 1 (24:11):
But you cannot base your passion off of success. It's
not based on what people love or like. It's based
on what you love or like. It's based on your
growth and your effort, on what you are making happen.
Your passion is not tied to that. Some people are
passionless because of that, because they think, well, I haven't
been successful. I've been doing this for two, three, four
(24:32):
or five years and nothing has changed, and no one
is complimenting me, and I'm not getting any gigs or
nothing is changing.
Speaker 2 (24:39):
That's the problem.
Speaker 1 (24:40):
You think that your passion is tied into approval, and
the moment that their approval doesn't exist, you let it die.
You think that approval will dictate joy. Your joyless because
you think that people need to like you. And this
is even deeper than just your passion. I know our
episode is about passion, but.
Speaker 2 (25:00):
This is just general life.
Speaker 1 (25:02):
Like for a lot of us, we allow the the
clapping of the people to dictate the joy in our life.
We allow the approval of other people to dictate the
joy of life, and the approval of family members, they
approve of friends, all these things. And this is why
you're joyless, right because you think that their approval is
going to change anything. I need you to understand that
it's not like a single person clapping for you is great,
(25:25):
but that single person clapping for you isn't gonna pay
a bill they're not gonna mend your heart, they're not
gonna help you grow, they're not going to change anything. Yes,
it's important to feel like we're seen and loved, and
I get that it is. It is intrinsically a desire.
Every human wants to be loved. Everyone wants to feel
like that. But you can't base what you do based
(25:48):
on what people like. You can't base what you do
and how you grow and your passions based on what
people say. Is okay, based on what people are because
people are people, They're always going to struggle, they always
gonna have their own opinion. And so I was gonna
have all these things to say. They can't do the
things that you're doing, but they will find ways to
criticize it. And when you sit here and allow the
criticism of the crowd to dictate the things that you do,
(26:09):
you will die by the approval of the crowd. You
will not live for the joy that you have in
your passion. Yes, you might be passionless because of that.
Yes you might want people to like it, Yes you
want all these things, But I need you to understand
that approval will never dictate joy. Passion is not based
on who says what but on what you do? So
(26:29):
how do we sustain our passion through our challenges?
Speaker 2 (26:32):
Like how do we.
Speaker 1 (26:33):
Actually stay consistent? How do we say that this is
the thing that I want to do well? First of all,
everything we just mentioned, like actually envisioning that person you
can be in sitting within doing the steps and growing
through it and knowing that this is a part of it.
But an end goal is huge, Like I'm doing this
thing now, and I've been doing this thing for some
time on and off, but I'm trying to be more
(26:53):
consistent now where I block my time in based in
like quarters, right, And I'm sure you've heard it before.
I think it's called like the the four months, four
quarter a year or something like that, where you have
everything blocked out and you have the timeframe of three months,
and you have goals that you want to accomplish in
those three months, and and I don't feel like I've
done the best is a capacity, but I will say
(27:18):
that because of that, there are some goals that I
achieved that they were almost like subconscious, Like I wasn't
driving the car. I kind of was just riding along
because everything was already planned out and the days needed
to be hit, and I was able to hit those
certain things without realizing it. Maybe not all of them,
maybe I didn't do as great as I could and
everything else, but some of the main priorities they just
(27:39):
kind of flew by. And I have this social media
and like this podcast, and all these things are byproducts
of that. They were byproducts of me being able to
set a system up that allowed me to be successful.
So my challenge for you as we get to the
to the end of this episode is is.
Speaker 2 (27:54):
To create a system.
Speaker 1 (27:55):
Right first, to sit with yourself and see what that
vision of you that that person who passionate and living
the best possible life that you could ever live is doing,
and actually sitting with that person and figuring out what.
Speaker 2 (28:06):
They do daily and regularly.
Speaker 1 (28:08):
And having that vision of them, and then going in
and saying, Okay, what am I going to do to
defan the flame of this passion that I have? How
am I going to make this grow? And how am
I going to do it so that I c love
it so that it's part of me? And I'm challenging
these limiting beliefs and I'm challenging these these things that
people have told me and how am I making that
about my passion, nothing else, not anyone else's approval, and
(28:31):
that anyone's a joy but mind, and then actually planning
it out like saying, okay, like okay, I want to
let's take back to my fitness thing.
Speaker 2 (28:38):
I want to be fit.
Speaker 1 (28:39):
I need to do X amount of workouts a week.
Speaker 2 (28:42):
I need to do this.
Speaker 1 (28:43):
So I'm going to fit this goal around that passion,
and then I'm going to make sure that I'm sticking
to at least the simple version of that, and then
everything else kind of compounds over it. Knowing that you
have a goal is going to allow you to actually
challenge those limited beliefs and actually live in your passion.
So you're struggling with passion, we're struggling with knowing what
(29:07):
your passion is, knowing what you were made for. We're
struggling with conflating pain with that. I need you to
understand that you are free to just be that there's
nothing extra that you need to do. That Where people
don't improve of you, that's okay because they don't prove
themselves anyway. When people don't clap for you, that's okay
because you need to learn to clap for you that
the passion that you do next, the thing that you
(29:27):
do next, it's aligning with who you want to be
and not.
Speaker 2 (29:30):
Who you believe you have to be.
Speaker 1 (29:33):
Thank you so much for being a part of this episode.
Thank you for looking at that mountain that you have
and I'm thinking you in behalf of you, that mountain
that you have in front of you, and questioning the
question as to why it's there. You were made to
conquer that mountain, you were made to turn pain into verbose. Son,
We'll see you on the next episode.
Sometimes we desire things so much so that even though
they hurt us and go against what's natural for us
and they don't actually serve the greater purpose in our life,
we tend to do that thing because we think it's
what we need to do, because we've spent so much
time feeling in it, that we stay in that same path.
I invested Sunky cost fatacy. I invested so much time
in this thing, and this thing doesn't pay off or
(00:22):
doesn't love me back, but I'm going to continue to
stay in it. This is made for this mountain with
Josh Rosa or turning pain into purpose. So when I
was a kid, I played baseball like every good Dominican
boy does. And I remember one day I was actually
in my grandmother's house and I was a backyard and
I had a baseball game literally a block away.
Speaker 2 (00:41):
But I was early.
Speaker 1 (00:42):
I'm super punctual for everything. I am the worst or
best Dominican I road. I don't know how to play
that one because I'm super punctual. I'm like thirty minutes
ahead of time for everything. And anyone knows that Dominican
knows that that's not really cultural with us, But for
me at the very least. I'm very punctual, so I'm
super early. So I decided I was going to hang
out and just do whatever. A twelve old kid was
doing a backyard, and I decided to go to the
back of the yard and go through the back of
(01:05):
the garage. And as I'm walking there, I didn't notice
that there was a plank that had a nail hit
right through the plank. So I decided, as was walking
in to step on this wonderful nail. Obviously it wasn't
a choice, it just happened. But when I stepped on
this nail, it went right through my foot, and I
remember the scruciating pain to this day. This was like
(01:25):
like twenty years ago into this day. I still get
like little phantom pains of that, and I remember the
struggle of that, how much blood there was. So what
I did, knowing that I had a game thirty minutes,
knowing that I was pitching that day, I decided that
I was gonna wrap my foot up and just go
and finish the go play the game. So I go
and I started playing the game, and about three innings in,
(01:46):
the coach kind of notices that I'm still limping. He's
like didn't think much of it, but you notice that
my foot was like really really big, like swollen to
the point where I was trying to move the shoe around.
And he comes to the mountain. He looks at me,
He says, why what happened? Why are you bleeding? Why
is there so much blood? And I told them, well,
I stepped on the nail, but I came to the
game anyway. I tell that story often because sometimes it's
the reality of desire versus pain, Like there's this thought
(02:10):
that we want to do something and we are willing
to suffer through it. But it doesn't always mean that
you should suffer just because you desire it, like me
wanting to be a part of that game. In retrospect
as an adult, it sounds stupid. It sounds like it
there was a dumb thing to do, right, There was
no point for me to go through that pain, to
bleed the way I was bleeding, an efforts to play
something that really didn't have much of a significance in
(02:32):
the greater role of my life. But I was in
that situation, in that moment, and I thought that that
was the best option, and that Praise God, they God,
it's not like I didn't have to lose my foot right,
It wasn't aputated. They just they gave me a shot
right and helped me heal from that.
Speaker 2 (02:47):
But it could have been so much worse.
Speaker 1 (02:50):
And I decided to put pain down and just swallow
the pain so that I could be in something that
I desired in that moment, even though there was no
point to say. It's a bigger message here, and I
need you to listen to it. Sometimes we desire things
so much so that even though they hurt us and
go against what's natural for us and they don't actually
serve the greater purpose in our life, we tend to
(03:11):
do that thing because we think it's what we need
to do, because we've spent somost so much time feeling
in it that we stay in that same path. I
invested Sunky cost fat icy. I invested so much time
in this thing, and this thing doesn't pay off or
doesn't love me back, but I'm going to continue to
stay in it. Yes, it hurt to be in it,
but you didn't need to remain and make the pain worse.
Speaker 2 (03:32):
You didn't need to.
Speaker 1 (03:32):
Stay in that or pitch that game that you could
have played another one you didn't need to be in
something knowing that you were actively hurt and actively bleeding.
And for a lot of us we think that that's
what it is for us, like we need to remain
in this. We were confusing passion with pain. We think
that our passion should hurt. To be sure, to be clear,
(03:53):
yes it can hurt, Yes it's a part of it.
Speaker 2 (03:55):
Yes growth has growth.
Speaker 1 (03:56):
Pains, But it doesn't mean that you have to hurt
to go through something. It doesn't mean that you have
to be in it. That if there's pain, isn't there
that whole saying, no pain, no gain. Sometimes the pain
shouldn't be to the point of killing you, It shouldn't
be to the point where you're miserable. Sometimes the pain
is just simply this small aspect of change that's gonna
come from your work and your ethic. But for a
(04:19):
lot of us, culturally, we've conditioned our passion to be
tied into the sacrifice that outweighs. What it really is
is desire versus passion. It is really there. That pain
is something that we keep replaying and staying. And science
actually gives you a definition for passion, and that I
had to write this down because it's good. Science views
(04:40):
passion as a strong inclination towards a self defining activity
that a person finds enjoyable, important, and invests time and
energy in. It's a developed trait, not something inherently possessed,
often emerging the curiosity engagement. It's positive experience, an acknowledging acquisition.
(05:02):
So here's the thing. Yes, passion can cost you something,
but it's also something that.
Speaker 2 (05:08):
You build out of.
Speaker 1 (05:09):
It's something you grow. Yes, there's a level of pain.
I'm not dismissing that. There isn't pain and passion that
there isn't pain in growth, There isn't this possibility of that.
I'm not dismissing that because that's a part of it.
Speaker 2 (05:18):
Right.
Speaker 1 (05:18):
Sometimes we think that the things that we want to
just fall in our lab No, they should. You have
to work for, you have to be a part of it.
But if you want to develop passion, if you want
to know what you're made for, if you want to
know how to gravitate those towards those things, it's first
starting with something that you're learning. Yes, there might be
things that are natural to you, Like I'm a natural speaker.
I love to talk that's the thing. Well, in certain situations,
(05:39):
I'm actually very introverted. I'm good in front of the camera,
I'm good on air, I'm good in front of a
stage of people, but around other people, I'm just socially awkward,
like do you like cheese? Like I don't know what
to talk about. So for me, that's actually a learned thing,
learned to be in front of other people. Yes, it
stems from something that I'm naturally good at, but it's
something that I didn't inherently have.
Speaker 2 (06:00):
I had to learn.
Speaker 1 (06:01):
There are people that are very good with the one
on one conversations, They're amazing at those things, but these
are things that we have to develop. So yes, there's
a level of pain. I don't want to dismiss that.
That's the reality. But sometimes we are hurting ourselves over
hurting ourselves thinking that it's producing something positive in us.
And I always equate this to.
Speaker 2 (06:17):
The oyster thing.
Speaker 1 (06:18):
I heard this a couple of years ago, and there's
so much beauty in it that oysters when they produce
the pearls. When oysters produce pearls, there's a system called
macharie that they go through. So what happens is that
there's a wound inside of the oyster. And as this
wound that salt comes into this wound. It now produces
this callous over it that now produces a pearl. There
(06:39):
is beauty that comes out of the pain. There's beauty
that comes out of that thing. But you are not
an oyster. You shouldn't feel like you have to consistently
be hurt for their beauty to be existent. You don't
have to go through this process of this to sit
here and figure out what your purpose is or even
it just ties to everything, right, even relationships with people.
Sometimes we feel like we have to allow ourselves to
be hurt because it's a part of a relationship.
Speaker 2 (07:02):
No, it's not.
Speaker 1 (07:03):
Yes, does it happen absolutely, But is it an intrinsic
part that should be happening naturally? You always know it isn't.
It's something that's a byproduct of a situation, not something
that you should bear and consistently stay and thinking. And
that's natural. It's not learning to define the pain that's purposeful,
that's good inside me, finding passion, that's a huge one.
(07:23):
Being able to define that one thing is going to
change that aspect, and that's what we want to do.
After this commercial break, we're going to dive into that
and actually define what passion.
Speaker 2 (07:32):
Looks like for you. So we'll be right back, So
welcome back.
Speaker 1 (07:36):
The mountain of who you are versus who you can
be will come down to what you believe, but even
more to the small things you actually do. When we're
looking at this mountain of passion, of knowing how to
develop that, how to grow in that, or we see
this possibility of who we are, what we can be,
what we can do when we sit and actually unpack
(07:56):
this reality, it's going to come down to the small
things that we do as we develop passion. As we
could write, like you said before, it's it's sometimes it's
not something that's just naturally to you. It's something that's
by practice, by acquisition of knowledge, by growth, these things
that you consicily did through to develop your passion. It's
not something that's it's going to be a big, grandiose act.
(08:17):
It's sometimes it's a very small forward stepping thing. It's
it's a progress that you're making through. It's the next
stages and the next steps that you're taking. That's our
first aspect to that. The reality that we need to
do the small things well. And often there's a mother
Teresa of Cacutta, which I'm sure so many people heard of.
She says, do the small things with great love, the
(08:38):
little things that you do that you really really love,
the things that you really live in, the things that
you that you grow in that don't have to be
this again grandiose, super loud and super expressive thing. But
it's this small, detailed thing, this thing that you put
so much work into consistently, this little effort that's what's
going to change is mountain. I think sometimes when we
talk about mountains, people think that they need to destroy
(09:00):
the whole thing. Sometimes what you need to do is
chip away at it. It's this possibility of growth through effort.
So the little things that you do are gonna be
the ultimate factor of what you grow on. You make
this like ladder based on small effort, small things. I
say this often and I will die on this one.
(09:20):
You can't say that you have a big dream without
little effort like these little efforts, These little things are
the things that make up the next level, the next prad,
the next stage, and it has to be this growth
in there. So how do you cultivate passion instead.
Speaker 2 (09:33):
Of just waiting for it.
Speaker 1 (09:34):
Like, it's not how do you actually make this progress?
Speaker 2 (09:36):
Well, we have a lot of factors to.
Speaker 1 (09:38):
This, but firstly we need to line up what we
actually want and contrast it versus.
Speaker 2 (09:42):
What we're actually doing.
Speaker 1 (09:44):
A lot of people want all these things, but they're
not doing the things that are coming up.
Speaker 2 (09:48):
Part of it.
Speaker 1 (09:48):
Again, I mention this because I'm actually gonna go to
the gym after I'm doing this. I'm really putting in
the work and I'm trying. Guys, we're making this happen.
But I can't say that I desire to be fit,
or to be able to lift a certain amount of weight,
or be able to run a certain timeframe or do
whatever it is, and I'm not doing the very small
minimum thing of just showing up in the place that
I can develop that in. Like i can't say I
(10:09):
want this next stage, but I'm not doing the bare
minimum of what that stage looks like. A lot of
people have dreams, they have hopes, but you have to
contrast what you're doing versus what you're saying. And there
is this quote that I heard once and I.
Speaker 2 (10:23):
Often live by too.
Speaker 1 (10:24):
It's that if people couldn't hear your voice, Like, if
they couldn't hear the things you were saying, would they
believe that you want to be what you want to
be based on the actions you're taking. If they saw you,
they saw the things you were doing but couldn't hear
or we're not convinced.
Speaker 2 (10:38):
By who you are.
Speaker 1 (10:39):
If they saw the actions, would they say that those
are actions of a person that desires that thing and
whatever that thing is, right, it doesn't matter what it is, fitness, right,
it could be are you doing the work, are you
working out relationships? Are you caring for your partner or finances?
Are you saying that you're saving and working on these things?
All these things are huge and vital, but they start
with the little things. They start with the progress of
(11:01):
making that little effort and then saying, does this aligning
with this thing that I'm hoping? Am I actually doing
the things? And for a lot of people that stops
because they're living and staying in their limiting beliefs. They're
mountain is the limited thing that they think they're capable
of doing. You have to address that in cultivating this
(11:21):
and growing your passion and actually living in your passion
you have to sit down with you and maybe a
paper and a pencil or maybe even a camera. I
think we live in an age where we have so
much technology, we might as well use it for the
things that are going to progress us, the things are
going to make us better. But really sitting down with
you and saying, what's that limited belief, Like, what's that
mountain in my life that's telling me that I'm not
capable of doing this thing? And why do I believe that?
(11:44):
And if you really unpack this, right, if we really
sit with this reality and think, why am I not
capable of doing this?
Speaker 2 (11:49):
For a lot of us, it actually.
Speaker 1 (11:50):
Stems to things that have been said or done to
us in our past. And yes, of course everyone always
goes to the parental wounds. Of course that's a thing
that is a thing that could be a part of it,
but it's not the only think. Sometimes we have allowed
the environment that we've grown up and the people that
we've been around. There's a in sociology, there's a theory
called a broken window theory, right where the environment that
you were raised in to the theory is that it
(12:13):
would impact the life that you live. The next thing
that you do and I agree with that to an extent.
I think that that is reality. That is a true
statement that there is is reality, that the things that
you are around are going to impact that. Why because
it comes back to this limiting belief. I think that
if I was born in nothing, that I'm destined to
be nothing and the people that are around me are
(12:33):
always going to be that factor, always going to be
that limiting ceiling as to what I can do. And
I need you to understand that you are only limited
by what you believe. You're limited by like the thing
that is stopping you from being the best version of you,
this version of you that is happy, joyful, successful, fruitful,
This version of you is only limited by the person
that you told it it could never be, which is you.
(12:54):
And there's always going to be this contrast of who
you have to fight, because everything in life there's a fight. Yes,
I mentioned earlier that pain is not always necessarily that
this is the catalyst for purpose, but I also mentioned
that there's a reality. There is a level of it.
There's levels that we put ourselves in, and there's levels
that we force upon us thinking that that's how we.
Speaker 2 (13:15):
Get to it.
Speaker 1 (13:15):
But there's also the reality, there's just levels of things
that you have to work through and grow through. And
the limiting belief that you give yourself is going to
cost you that conversation. You're going to have to address
that and say, what's this thing that's stopping me from
being that? Is it really my environment or is it
the belief that my environment can didicate that?
Speaker 2 (13:32):
Is it the.
Speaker 1 (13:33):
Belief that I'm not worth It is the belief that
the people around me have always told me that this
is what I am. So my purpose is tied into
what they've said. Yes, is it true that you have
to deal with this and come and confront it. Absolutely,
But it's also true that this should not define you.
It should not be the end all be all for you.
You have to really come to this reality is who
told you you couldn't? Who made you question that this
(13:56):
is limited to you? And I need you to question
the question. I Again, I come from a background of faith,
and one thing that I speak about often, especially when
we talk about like yeah to me, even the garden,
all these things, I think the biggest deception that the
enemy has ever created, the levels were created in humans.
Whether you believe in this or not. Again, just so
much philosophy behind this, so much meat behind this that
(14:18):
whether it's faith based for you or not, this is
a very important question you need to ask yourself because
in the garden, Eve makes uh. The serpent makes Eve
question right, she makes some question. She doesn't doesn't deny, it,
doesn't say anything. He makes me question the truth. And
that's that's what happens with a lot of us, that
the snake in our ear makes us question what is
real for me? What is true for me? What's actually
(14:41):
good for me?
Speaker 2 (14:41):
Like?
Speaker 1 (14:41):
Am I doing the thing that's most purposeful in my life?
Is it align aligning with my passion? Or is that
snake in my ear making me question my ability? Is
it telling me that I can't do this? Is telling
me that I'm not capable of growth in this progress.
I need you to question the question. I need you
to sit there and analyze this, saying that that's that's
sitting with you, this thing that's not letting you get
(15:01):
through this mountain, this thing is limiting you to the
small step of who you can fully be, and question
why is there an actual reason for this? Or am
I sitting here and just replaying lies that I've been
told about me or lies that I've believed about me
for so long that I.
Speaker 2 (15:18):
Don't question it. I just believe it. And here's the beauty.
Speaker 1 (15:21):
Right, Let's say that there is something real, like there's
something substantial and big in your life that's stopping you
from being this fruitful and purpose for you. Let's just
take that for a second. If you sat with this,
if you really sat with this reality and saw that
now you're actually exposing it so that you can't address it,
so that you can't change it. But for most of us,
(15:42):
our reality is always going to be that we have
limited ourselves to the things that we think we're limited to.
We haven't questioned the question, We've just accepted it as
our reality. So you haven't developed passion because you think
that your passion is too great for you. You think
that the thing that you want to do is outside
of the realm of real of what you're capable of doing.
And you've limited the actions that you take next because
(16:04):
someone told you that you couldn't, because you keep telling
you that you can't, because you believe that the things
around you are going to go against you and not
for you. I need you to question the question. I
need you to sit here and really really just look
at this thing that's lied to you, and stop letting
it lie to you, stop letting your passion be limited.
Speaker 2 (16:26):
By a lie.
Speaker 1 (16:27):
For a lot of people, we have stopped the growth
in our lives because we don't think we're capable. And
I'll be completely vulnerable with you. I've done that myself.
There's been so many times where I've seen the growth
and seen all this amazingness that's been happening around me,
and I've stopped myself from thinking that I am deserving
of it. I stop myself from sitting here and thinking.
And I want to be clear. It doesn't mean that
(16:48):
you're arrogant and you're you know, you're bougie and you're like, oh,
I deserve everything. But I need you to also be
confident in loving in you so much so that you
say you do deserve things. You do deserve the progress
of the work that you've put in. You do deserve
the growth of the things that you're trying. You do
deserve the goodness of this world. And as much as
you keep believing the lie, when you start speaking into it,
(17:09):
when you start questioning the question, it changes the perspective
of the power that question has when you say is
this true or is this something that I'm just sitting with?
It changes that for you to live in your passion
and know what passion actually is and build out passion
because it's gonna again, it's gonna be something that requires
effort and work. You are going to have to repeat
and learn, and you're gonna have to fail and hurt,
(17:31):
and these things are all gonna have to be a
byproduct of you questioning the question because the moments you
hit a wall, if you don't question the question, you're
gonna believe that that wall is your limit. You're gonna
think that this thing that I've been limited to is real,
and that's where the pain is gonna be overbearing. You're
gonna sit with pain thinking, well, this pain is normal
and it's a part of the thing for me to
learn my lesson. I need you to wake up and
(17:53):
realize that your passion is not limited to what you've
been around, or who you've been around, or what you're
in or what' you're you've been in, or even the
mistakes you made yesterday. Those things are not in tomorrow.
They're not in today. I need you to question the question.
We develop our passion by knowing that, and then we
develop our passion by the habits that we create. It's
(18:16):
creating intrinsic motion, natural motion to what we want. The
vision of who you can be and what they do.
I need you to make that the forefront of everything.
The vision of my potential, that person that I want
to be, and all the actions that they take in
their day. What are the things that they do, how
do they live their life? What is the thing that
drives the catalyst as to why they do the next step,
(18:38):
because again this takes us very really back to what
we said. We can't be the person that we know
we can be without knowing the things that they would do,
without knowing how do they live their day, without knowing
how they respond to people, without knowing the version of that.
So as you sit down with this, I want you
to sit down with that version of you. And in fact,
let's make this step even further. Let's make this that
(19:00):
when you are sitting with that version of you, envision
this person of you that you can be and take
their advice. Do what they're saying, do what they did,
what you think would be the path to that, because
the reality is that we all know this, We know
what that person looks like, we know what that version
of us is, and we just don't sit with this
because we think that it's impossible. We've limited that vision
(19:23):
just to that wall. We limited that vision to that
lie in our ear. We limited that vision to everything
else that's around us because it doesn't seem real, like,
it doesn't seem achievable, because it's easier to believe that
you are not worth it than it is to believe
that you can make this work. And I need you
to understand that that version of you exists, like we
(19:44):
always compared to the Marvel multiverse, there is a version
of you out there that is the best possible version
of you. And that version of you has some great
advice for you. And we're actually going to dive in
a little bit deeper right after this commercial break. So
now that you know that there's a version of there,
now you know that there's a thought of that actually existing,
Now that you know that there is a reality and
(20:05):
a possibility that there is something out there similar to that,
sitting down with what you think, what you believe, what
you hope that person can look like is going to
be huge why because you're able to pick your own
brain right sit there and actually, now here's the thing. Okay,
of course, first of all, just the reality is that
you can't do this right and you know those things.
But if you don't do the steps, this is where
we're gonna fall apart. This is where we're We're not
(20:26):
gonna go back to the first portion of this because
when you don't do the things that you have to do,
you'll be stuck with the things that you were forced
to be stuck with. When you don't sit here and say, okay,
future version of me, what would you do on this day,
this day, this day, What does your daily routine look like?
What are the goals that you had on this month
and this here? What did you allow people to say
(20:47):
or doude you when you don't sit with these things,
when you don't ask that version of you that when
and then you don't do the things that that version
of you says, then you're not trying to be that
version of you. You just know that version of you
can't exist. And I think that's more painful than being
able to take the little steps now to do the
things that version would actually do, than it is to
sit here and know that it exists and I just
(21:09):
didn't want to do it. The vision of you of
what they would do is going to change so much.
It's gonna be the catalyst of what reality you have.
Because again, yes, it's fun to say, like the multiverse
thing and thing of that person's out there, But the
truth is that that person is you, Like that dream,
the person that you have, that that speaks to people
(21:29):
the way you speak, that stands up for themselves, the
way you stand up, that that does the work, that
wakes up every day, that chooses the best options for you.
That person is you. You are there, You know what
that person would do, and being able to sit here
and confront yourself is going to be the biggest factor.
And that's hard for some of us, for a lot
of us, most of us, I'll say, it's hard to
(21:51):
confront myself and say what I'm doing wrong because it's
easier to just flow with the current of the mess
of my life, like I have to get up and
do something that's hard. That's a tough thing to swallow
and to be in. And our last section here is
why are you passionless? Like what is it about you?
(22:11):
And maybe you have some level of passion. Maybe there's
something that you are dreaming for and aiming to achieve
and you're just struggling with this next step there. But
I need you to understand that passion is not about success.
It's about movement, like knowing that I don't have to
have it figured out perfectly, knowing that I don't have
to have all the answers today, knowing that I don't
(22:33):
have to be a superstar tomorrow. I simply get to
the ability and the presence to be. That's actual passion.
It's not about success. It's about doing the thing that
I know is going to serve my heart. The best
thing that I know that I'm going to love. Growing
in passion is being able to do that. Now. Again,
is success a byproduct? Absolutely, If you're doing something you
(22:54):
really love and you do it really well and you
grow in it, success is going to exist in terms of,
you know, the understanding of success. But it shouldn't be
the goal. You shouldn't sit here and say, well, I
use this often. I say this a lot too. With
content creators. I say you should not make content because
you want people to like your content, because at that
point you're not creating content for yourself, you're creating it
(23:17):
for approval, and the moment that people don't approve of
your content, then you think that it's worthless and pointless,
and then you'll stop. There is no passion behind it
because you're conflating passion with success. You think that these
two things are mutually exclusive, and they're not. Yes, this
is a byproduct. Yes you can get success from it.
(23:37):
Yes you can grow from that. Yes you can do
these things, but you cannot base your metric of passion
on how many people.
Speaker 2 (23:46):
Approve of your passion.
Speaker 1 (23:48):
Listen, If your passion is I don't know, balloon folding like,
if that's what you love, if that's the thing that
draws you to be the best version of you, that's
where your passion is, then so be. I promise you
there is a niche out there of people who love
that art form, who love that thing that you do,
who are who are seeing that and thinking, wow, you
(24:09):
are so amazing.
Speaker 2 (24:10):
Do this.
Speaker 1 (24:11):
But you cannot base your passion off of success. It's
not based on what people love or like. It's based
on what you love or like. It's based on your
growth and your effort, on what you are making happen.
Your passion is not tied to that. Some people are
passionless because of that, because they think, well, I haven't
been successful. I've been doing this for two, three, four
(24:32):
or five years and nothing has changed, and no one
is complimenting me, and I'm not getting any gigs or
nothing is changing.
Speaker 2 (24:39):
That's the problem.
Speaker 1 (24:40):
You think that your passion is tied into approval, and
the moment that their approval doesn't exist, you let it die.
You think that approval will dictate joy. Your joyless because
you think that people need to like you. And this
is even deeper than just your passion. I know our
episode is about passion, but.
Speaker 2 (25:00):
This is just general life.
Speaker 1 (25:02):
Like for a lot of us, we allow the the
clapping of the people to dictate the joy in our life.
We allow the approval of other people to dictate the
joy of life, and the approval of family members, they
approve of friends, all these things. And this is why
you're joyless, right because you think that their approval is
going to change anything. I need you to understand that
it's not like a single person clapping for you is great,
(25:25):
but that single person clapping for you isn't gonna pay
a bill they're not gonna mend your heart, they're not
gonna help you grow, they're not going to change anything. Yes,
it's important to feel like we're seen and loved, and
I get that it is. It is intrinsically a desire.
Every human wants to be loved. Everyone wants to feel
like that. But you can't base what you do based
(25:48):
on what people like. You can't base what you do
and how you grow and your passions based on what
people say. Is okay, based on what people are because
people are people, They're always going to struggle, they always
gonna have their own opinion. And so I was gonna
have all these things to say. They can't do the
things that you're doing, but they will find ways to
criticize it. And when you sit here and allow the
criticism of the crowd to dictate the things that you do,
(26:09):
you will die by the approval of the crowd. You
will not live for the joy that you have in
your passion. Yes, you might be passionless because of that.
Yes you might want people to like it, Yes you
want all these things, But I need you to understand
that approval will never dictate joy. Passion is not based
on who says what but on what you do? So
(26:29):
how do we sustain our passion through our challenges?
Speaker 2 (26:32):
Like how do we.
Speaker 1 (26:33):
Actually stay consistent? How do we say that this is
the thing that I want to do well? First of all,
everything we just mentioned, like actually envisioning that person you
can be in sitting within doing the steps and growing
through it and knowing that this is a part of it.
But an end goal is huge, Like I'm doing this
thing now, and I've been doing this thing for some
time on and off, but I'm trying to be more
(26:53):
consistent now where I block my time in based in
like quarters, right, And I'm sure you've heard it before.
I think it's called like the the four months, four
quarter a year or something like that, where you have
everything blocked out and you have the timeframe of three months,
and you have goals that you want to accomplish in
those three months, and and I don't feel like I've
done the best is a capacity, but I will say
(27:18):
that because of that, there are some goals that I
achieved that they were almost like subconscious, Like I wasn't
driving the car. I kind of was just riding along
because everything was already planned out and the days needed
to be hit, and I was able to hit those
certain things without realizing it. Maybe not all of them,
maybe I didn't do as great as I could and
everything else, but some of the main priorities they just
(27:39):
kind of flew by. And I have this social media
and like this podcast, and all these things are byproducts
of that. They were byproducts of me being able to
set a system up that allowed me to be successful.
So my challenge for you as we get to the
to the end of this episode is is.
Speaker 2 (27:54):
To create a system.
Speaker 1 (27:55):
Right first, to sit with yourself and see what that
vision of you that that person who passionate and living
the best possible life that you could ever live is doing,
and actually sitting with that person and figuring out what.
Speaker 2 (28:06):
They do daily and regularly.
Speaker 1 (28:08):
And having that vision of them, and then going in
and saying, Okay, what am I going to do to
defan the flame of this passion that I have? How
am I going to make this grow? And how am
I going to do it so that I c love
it so that it's part of me? And I'm challenging
these limiting beliefs and I'm challenging these these things that
people have told me and how am I making that
about my passion, nothing else, not anyone else's approval, and
(28:31):
that anyone's a joy but mind, and then actually planning
it out like saying, okay, like okay, I want to
let's take back to my fitness thing.
Speaker 2 (28:38):
I want to be fit.
Speaker 1 (28:39):
I need to do X amount of workouts a week.
Speaker 2 (28:42):
I need to do this.
Speaker 1 (28:43):
So I'm going to fit this goal around that passion,
and then I'm going to make sure that I'm sticking
to at least the simple version of that, and then
everything else kind of compounds over it. Knowing that you
have a goal is going to allow you to actually
challenge those limited beliefs and actually live in your passion.
So you're struggling with passion, we're struggling with knowing what
(29:07):
your passion is, knowing what you were made for. We're
struggling with conflating pain with that. I need you to
understand that you are free to just be that there's
nothing extra that you need to do. That Where people
don't improve of you, that's okay because they don't prove
themselves anyway. When people don't clap for you, that's okay
because you need to learn to clap for you that
the passion that you do next, the thing that you
(29:27):
do next, it's aligning with who you want to be
and not.
Speaker 2 (29:30):
Who you believe you have to be.
Speaker 1 (29:33):
Thank you so much for being a part of this episode.
Thank you for looking at that mountain that you have
and I'm thinking you in behalf of you, that mountain
that you have in front of you, and questioning the
question as to why it's there. You were made to
conquer that mountain, you were made to turn pain into verbose. Son,
We'll see you on the next episode.
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