151 - Live at the Queen Elizabeth Theatre in Vancouver

Karen and Georgia cover the Abbotsford Killer and the Salish Sea human foot mystery.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:44):
What's up Vancouver? Who look like go all the way
up there? Okay, right there.

Speaker 2 (01:04):
And over there.

Speaker 1 (01:08):
That's right.

Speaker 2 (01:11):
Now.

Speaker 1 (01:12):
We're just going to do this for three hours, different sections,
that's right, competing for sound. Oh thank you so much.
You can tell that this is the fourth night of

(01:34):
this leg of the tour because I have no idea
what my hair is doing right now. I really don't.
I really don't. Oh, I know what mine's doing.

Speaker 2 (01:42):
What you're doing, it's fucking not getting washed and getting
in pigtails.

Speaker 1 (01:46):
Oh really?

Speaker 2 (01:48):
Yes? This is my Oh shit, I think I have
to stop doing this when I turned forty? What am
I going to do?

Speaker 1 (01:58):
You mean, no pigtails past forty?

Speaker 2 (02:00):
I keep pushing it further and further, though, so I
feel like I'm gonna be no pigtails past eighty some day.

Speaker 1 (02:06):
I have an idea. You can keep the pigtails past forty,
well into your sixties, as long as you wear high
vinyl boots and a mini skirt. But done, done and done.
Don I.

Speaker 2 (02:19):
Had that on underneath this sh Speaking of outfits, look
at yours?

Speaker 1 (02:24):
Oh yes, well that's okay. Oh oh Canada pockets that's right,
I have pocket two. I asked for two in this
one and I gave them to me.

Speaker 2 (02:42):
Wow. You, let's know. Someone at the.

Speaker 1 (02:46):
I was like, you know what add a second pocket?

Speaker 2 (02:49):
I have two hands and I'm gonna use both of them.

Speaker 1 (02:55):
Well, I mean, what to say about my outfit? It's
from lands End and wonderful catalog for women who have
their own rude bag of farms in New England. And uh,
I didn't realize that they made dresses that fit me
perfectly and have pockets until I ordered one, and I

(03:17):
was like, lands End, you're my boyfriend forever. New boots
they hurt, but I've got so cute. I've got boots
that are making me pay for every sin I've ever
committed in my life, but which is fun?

Speaker 2 (03:34):
And uh, there's.

Speaker 1 (03:37):
A guy right, I know. I don't pray that you guys. Also,
I got these tights at the drugstore right before I
left Los Angeles. Don't do that to yourself. These tights
are light gray at best, they're nowhere near black. So
now I'm doing black gray black ruined. The look is ruined,
man bullet, but that's a gay gets in my hairs.

Speaker 2 (03:58):
I was like, Dad, but I look like a girl
named Donna who smokes at the bar.

Speaker 1 (04:02):
So that's the character I'll be doing tonight, right, It's fun.
I love Donna. Donna, she's the best to hang out with.

Speaker 2 (04:13):
Well, I look all dressed up tonight, Yes you do?
Thank you? There?

Speaker 1 (04:19):
Should I have said that to you?

Speaker 2 (04:20):
No, I'm I mean, I'm not complimenting myself truly. If
this isn't dressed up, then I am fucking quit, you know.
But when I but I was gonna tell them about
what I look like when I fly.

Speaker 1 (04:31):
Yes, please me, that's the best.

Speaker 2 (04:34):
Oh my god. Okay, here's the thing, you guys. I'm
not one of those like girls that look really pretty
when they sleep and wake up. Who are those there's there?
They have patic hair. Yeah, not real. It's not me,
which is fine. Uh.

Speaker 1 (04:48):
I don't think that's anything anyone needs to strive for.

Speaker 2 (04:51):
No.

Speaker 1 (04:51):
Right, if we're now worried about being hot while we sleep,
let's just fucking give up. It's insanity. Let's not.

Speaker 2 (04:58):
But you know those movies where it's like she looks
like an angel, It's like, that's not me.

Speaker 1 (05:03):
I because they have fucking makeup artists that are coming
in to touch them up every seconds and they're not
real and.

Speaker 2 (05:08):
They're not sleeping for real. It's a movie, right, I
had the beauty standards. Turns out are fucked. Oh fucked,
because the reality is sometimes what you look like when
you're sleeping is that your fucking entire jaw is unhinged
and you are just wide open with your mouth open.
And you are on a plane and you're wearing sunglasses

(05:30):
because the fucking asshole in front of you didn't get
the memo that everyone else is fucking windshield, so they
call him. Nope, it's closed, and so it's bright. And
then it turns out you have a husband who takes
a photo.

Speaker 1 (05:44):
Of you all your sleeping. It's fun and you love him.
You still love him.

Speaker 2 (05:50):
Oh go.

Speaker 1 (05:56):
I swear to God, this one does not get old.
It does not get old. You know what's really fun
is people were posting. People took pictures of it last
night and posted it. It's so much funnier from the
back of the room. I swear to God, just the
scope of it.

Speaker 2 (06:14):
I feel like this weekend has been the get over
it tour for me, Like this is just how your
life is like now, and it's totally okay, which is fine.
I'm like, great, it's pretty great. And I love that Vince.
I don't know. I've told him before, like I love
when you take candid photos of me.

Speaker 1 (06:28):
But this isn't what I meant. He didn't really mean
candid at all, and he doesn't normally do that. And
so when I woke up, he.

Speaker 2 (06:38):
Turned to me to show me what he had done.
But he had had his he had his earbuds in,
so he did that thing where you yell because you
have music on. So we're on a plane, a small plane,
shows me the photo, turns to me and tells me
and yells what he thinks I look like. He goes
the uniformer on a plane. You shouldn't do that.

Speaker 1 (07:06):
If I was on the plane and I had my
earbuds in and I was going to show that picture,
I would have said, blind Paddington Bear. But you weren't
on that plane. It turns out I missed that plane.
Here's the thing, this lifestyle I really love and I
want to make it as rock and roll as possible.

(07:28):
So what I did was because normally, and this is
kind of boring, but normally we leave for our flights
out of lax which is like one thousand miles away
from where anyone lives in Los Angeles. But they actually
made Vince booked us on a flight out of Burbank,
which is literally ten minutes down the street from my house.

Speaker 2 (07:48):
It's so exciting and it's like you just breeze in.
They're like they look at you and they're like, you
look fine, and you just get in. It's the easiest
things easy. It's very small, and I have fucking valet parking.

Speaker 1 (08:00):
They know who it's for. Yeah, total assholes in Los
Angeles exactly.

Speaker 2 (08:05):
Our flight was at nine thirty and I left my
house at nine fifteen.

Speaker 1 (08:09):
I don't know.

Speaker 2 (08:11):
At what point did you realize like that was do you?
I don't know.

Speaker 1 (08:15):
I have so many questions. I can actually tell you
it was a fucking.

Speaker 2 (08:17):
Obsessive, compulsive, untimey person. I just am striving to understand.

Speaker 1 (08:25):
I don't think I can explain it to you because
I'm an obsessive, compulsive, not timey person. Where you know,
I'm almost fifty years old and clocks still baffle me.
I'm like, what how is it that time?

Speaker 2 (08:38):
Like they're actually being mean to you.

Speaker 1 (08:40):
Yeah, they're attacking me personally. Yeah, I had detoured myself
a bit, uh, plucking every hair off of my face
before I went. Sometimes you just want to have very
thin eyebrows on the air.

Speaker 2 (08:53):
I don't know.

Speaker 1 (08:54):
I don't know what happened. All I know is when
I went out to pick up my bag and I
looked at the clock, I just started screaming, fuck reallywed
like that was gonna get me there faster. But what
was funny is, and I kind of love stuff like
this is when I went up to the counter to
check in at Alaska. The woman when I said, oh,
I'm on the ninth thirty flight to Portland, she goes

(09:15):
the nine thirty flight. It's already closed, like it was
her fucking flight, Like I ruined.

Speaker 2 (09:22):
Her tour weekend, like she had a show in Portland
to get to that night. He's like, bitch, I'm butting
that vest. You're not going anywhere.

Speaker 1 (09:33):
So I had to text, as an adult, had to
text another adult until them when I missed my fucking
flight that was arms reach from the front door of
my house. Vince was like, no problem, I'm going to
book you on the eleven am flight. And here's how
he's a brilliant man, because he's teaching me how to
not miss my flight anymore. Instead of flying first class

(09:56):
on Alaska, I was now flying on Southwest. That's right,
that's right.

Speaker 2 (10:03):
You know that one that you have to line up
for with people who have never seen numbers before, and
they're fucking lives.

Speaker 1 (10:09):
It turns out with all the people, there's like a
section of businessmen that like to fly Southwest and talk
about their dumb jobs at the top of their fucking lungs.
Have you ever dude sat in front and the front
of two businessmen.

Speaker 2 (10:23):
That were like, well, last last week we were in Albuquerque.

Speaker 1 (10:26):
It's like, sir, the yelling is un necessary.

Speaker 2 (10:30):
That guy was, I hate to break this Southwest hate
fests we have going on it. Guy was on my flight.
Oh and I was in that first class. We spoke
of sleeping like this.

Speaker 1 (10:42):
And the the general manager.

Speaker 2 (10:44):
Of said, Albuquerque really square to god, they're all the same.

Speaker 1 (10:48):
It's one Albuquerque going around and pissing people off. It's
like a prank show that never pays off.

Speaker 2 (10:58):
And then so they but I interrupted your because.

Speaker 1 (11:02):
No, I think that was it.

Speaker 2 (11:03):
Okay. I mean we're talking about airplane flights and ship
These people do not care.

Speaker 1 (11:08):
How can they? How can they oh that.

Speaker 2 (11:12):
Speaking of that, this is my favorite murder of the podcast.

Speaker 1 (11:14):
Hello, thanks guys. This is Karen cale Garap and this
is Georgia Hart.

Speaker 2 (11:22):
Start guy.

Speaker 1 (11:27):
Uh, we're very happy to be here at Canada with
you guys. We had a very exciting thing happened at
the border.

Speaker 2 (11:34):
Oh yeah, yeah, you guys all drove up today and
we were behind you.

Speaker 1 (11:38):
Yeah, because when we got to the lady in the
in the box, Vince haandred overall our papers and information
and she said what are you doing or whatever, and
then said we have a show tonight in Vancouver.

Speaker 2 (11:54):
And she goes, oh, you guys are doing the show
and we're like yeah. She's like, oh, ever, uh what
did she say everyone coming through is going yeah or
something like that.

Speaker 1 (12:04):
She didn't. She said something like, I don't have to
ask about it because the last ten people told me
about it.

Speaker 2 (12:15):
You guys are on ground team spreading the word.

Speaker 1 (12:18):
Thank you so much because we were able to smuggle
so much heroine into this country. They never ate twice
on us.

Speaker 2 (12:24):
That's right, we're posing as podcasters even international drug smuggling
rad lass cover. Ever, Uh, Steven's not here. No, there's
not enough room under this table for him.

Speaker 1 (12:38):
Do you want to know where he is? I'll show
you where he is.

Speaker 2 (12:42):
Oh that gets sent to me the other day from
my house of Mimi. I mean, have you seen a
bitchier cat's face in your life?

Speaker 1 (12:57):
Truly? But most judgmental?

Speaker 2 (13:00):
Kat.

Speaker 1 (13:01):
She's like, you're not using that filter, are you right?
Here's the thing. At some point in the future, Stephen's
going to be I think, a father and a husband.

Speaker 2 (13:11):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (13:11):
Can you imagine stumbling upon a picture of your father
like that? Just being like what the mom My god,
my dad used to dress up like a rabbit online.

Speaker 2 (13:21):
Oh my god and get judged by cats and look
like Daria and like, oh my god, dad, Holy shit, Mommy,
Easter bunny's here, and I think he.

Speaker 1 (13:37):
Might be a sex pervert.

Speaker 2 (13:40):
Mom, Mommy, Easter Bunny has a mustache, or maybe she's
having flashbacks because every year I have these Easter Bunny
this like Easter Bunny bonnet I put on her.

Speaker 1 (13:50):
Do you put on me me?

Speaker 2 (13:51):
Yeah? Oh she doesn't like that. Oh, but it's so quick.
I do it so quickly. I get one photo and
then I put it up and it makes me happy.

Speaker 1 (13:59):
It means me joy and she.

Speaker 2 (14:00):
Realizes that that's happening.

Speaker 1 (14:03):
No, look at her.

Speaker 2 (14:05):
No, I know if she was on the stairs and
I was there, I just wouldn't go upstairs.

Speaker 1 (14:10):
I mean me, me doesn't fuck around.

Speaker 2 (14:12):
Yeah, it's like it's like putting a bonnet on Ruth
Bader Ginsburg, Like who are you?

Speaker 1 (14:18):
Why would you do such a thing? If anyone knows computers,
could you please give me me a Ruth Bader Ginsburg
type bun Just that real tight, cold.

Speaker 2 (14:27):
Hardcore that's your thing today.

Speaker 1 (14:31):
That's your assign Metro Simon, if you choose to accept it.

Speaker 2 (14:34):
And then we have one more that I want to
show you what what Stephen did to my cat. He
I don't know where he fucking even got that, you
guys that came out on Thursday, that like new line
of ship and he somehow acquired one.

Speaker 1 (14:52):
Uh.

Speaker 2 (14:52):
I did get my flu shot and I got five
dollars off.

Speaker 1 (14:55):
To jobs, yes, yep.

Speaker 2 (15:01):
And then he dressed my cat, which feels like a
like a personal you know attack, it is an attack
on you for sure, in a shirt that says that
he's himself. Yeah, and the and I know that sweet
look in his face of why you know, like I
know that look. I've seen it when I like, I
do you know, when I hold him like a baby
and he's like, I don't want to do this, but

(15:21):
I love you.

Speaker 1 (15:22):
Yeah, it's that. Or maybe you put like reindeer antlers
on him at Christmas. He's Jewish.

Speaker 2 (15:27):
Oh sorry, he's Jewish.

Speaker 1 (15:33):
He's the world's only Siamese jew cat.

Speaker 2 (15:37):
No, there's a lot of them, actually, are there. Really,
it's a whole network. We have a Facebook page, subgroups,
little yamakas we put on You.

Speaker 1 (15:45):
Should actually get just one single shirt made that says I'm.

Speaker 2 (15:49):
The Elvia, I'm the elvis or like ex outh them,
n I'm in, I'm never mind.

Speaker 1 (15:55):
We'll work it out. We'll work it out backstage, guys,
we're work shopping for the next show. You mind if
we just talk about merch for a while. We're gonna
have a quick merch meeting and can get back to you.
That's right, we sit down, Yeah, let's do it. Oh yes, yes, Canada.

Speaker 2 (16:16):
We ordered the punk Rock chairs and I got them
the punk Rock extra duct tape.

Speaker 1 (16:24):
This chair is.

Speaker 2 (16:24):
About to tell me to funk off when I sit
on it. Okay, huh, I can handle it, that's right. Like,
these chairs have Mimi's look on her face.

Speaker 1 (16:33):
Yeah, we've seen so much they have.

Speaker 2 (16:37):
That's comfortable. There we go and hear it there.

Speaker 1 (16:39):
Oh, I like these there's a little ring down there
or like a bar. I can hook my boot eels
on the back door and then just god, they're scaring me.

Speaker 2 (16:51):
Wish I was closer to the edge of the stage
for that. Crowdsurfing. We have to start crowdsurfing, which you guys,
we just break everyone's face. There are poor faces people
who if they do not listen to this podcast that
work here are like, what in the fuck is going on?

Speaker 1 (17:14):
What is any of this shit?

Speaker 2 (17:15):
Oh my god, this is a true crime comedy podcast. Yes,
confusing to some people.

Speaker 1 (17:26):
Except for that person, this is a we like we
now have a your discretion warning at the top of
the show because we know that some of you guys
like to force people to come here with you who
don't listen and don't care. Ye aren't interested, don't get it.

Speaker 2 (17:44):
But I promised a nice dinner, right kind of wish
you would order something more expensive to make this worth it.

Speaker 1 (17:52):
But so for those people who aren't sure, there's a
true crime comedy podcast, which are you know, some might
argue diametrically oppose those concepts, true crime being all about
murder and the loss of human life, and tragedy and
then comedy, and it can be very kind of complex
and layered.

Speaker 2 (18:12):
It's like, I just realized it's those two, you know,
comedy and tragedy masks.

Speaker 1 (18:17):
Yeah, that's right. Why isn't that our logo our logo? Yeah,
is going to be our logo next year. We're going
to turn our logo to the comedy tragedy masks of theater.
I mean truly, nothing.

Speaker 2 (18:32):
Legitimizes you more than the comedy and tragedy. That's right.

Speaker 1 (18:35):
It's like we're we're of the theater. We're also fucking nerds.
Yeah so yeah, listen to our podcast. Right Anyway, the
whole point of this speech is that sometimes the comedy
combination of those two things might be offensive to some
people who don't know us or don't listen it might
it might seem wrong to you if you're one of

(18:56):
those kind of people. We just we really want you
to know you should get the fuck out now, because
it's it's not going to get better. It won't get better,
that's right. You know, before we start I printed up
some fun Vancouver trivia. Do you want to hear it? Sharing?

Speaker 2 (19:17):
Tell me that was?

Speaker 1 (19:18):
That was my reaction from the theater. Truly you did?

Speaker 2 (19:24):
You did? Yes? Tell me everything?

Speaker 1 (19:26):
Well, because Stephen sometimes sends us an email of trivia. Yeah, God,
bless his soul. He really busts his ass for us,
and all we do is just give him ship and
make fun of him on stage. That's not cool.

Speaker 2 (19:38):
He's like, truly loves my cats, and I'm like, em,
don't put.

Speaker 1 (19:41):
His shirt on it. But like Steven's trivia, I think
one of the only things in that email just said
that the California role was invented here. We're just like,
thanks guys, thanks Steven. Although interesting, what the fuck? It's
nothing like this trivia that I got out of the

(20:02):
Vancouver Sun for real. In nineteen oh eight, Jeff the
boxing Kangaroo amused big crowds at the Pantagious Theater. So
that's the kind of shit we have to follow tonight.

Speaker 2 (20:14):
Follow that.

Speaker 1 (20:15):
I don't know, shit, Jeff, somebody named a kangaroo Jeff
in nineteen o eight. Oh my god, it's called being
a visionary.

Speaker 2 (20:24):
Yeah, ahead of his time.

Speaker 1 (20:27):
I mean in nineteen oh nine. The following year, Vancouver
took its first mechanized ambulance out for a test drive,
and it immediately ran over and killed an American tourist.

Speaker 3 (20:37):
Yeah no, no, oh my god, alrip, that sucks.

Speaker 2 (20:51):
Wow, what a bummer.

Speaker 1 (20:55):
Jeff the boxing kangaroo was on the sidewalk giggling behind
his hand chaff. Stupid American. In nineteen thirty one, the
Province newspaper had this startling lead to a story one
person in every three hundred in British Columbia is insane.
That's hilarious, including your ambulance drivers. Maybe that was back

(21:22):
when ambulance drivers had to like stir up their own business.

Speaker 2 (21:25):
You know what I mean.

Speaker 1 (21:26):
Yeah, it was like a private company. And then we're like,
well it was for profit ambulancing in nineteen twenty oh
I didn't do this chronologically. In nineteen twenty in Surrey,
laggers found an eagle's nest so big it was too
large for a farm wagon to haul away.

Speaker 2 (21:48):
Well, that just makes you assume that the person knows
what how big a farm wagon is.

Speaker 1 (21:52):
I'm from the suburbs.

Speaker 2 (21:53):
I'm pretty sure every farm wagon is standardly about two
bales of hay wide.

Speaker 1 (22:00):
And for long, right, I would say you stack him
up for it sounds like a big nest. I mean,
I'm saying it was a fucking pterodactyl nest, and no
one's talking about it. I'm here tonight to say, you guys,
legends are the land of the lost. On October eleventh,
nineteen thirty nine, Vancouver's first public aquarium opened. The manager

(22:23):
was an American named Ivar Hagland, who later moved to
Seattle and opened a restaurant called Ivar's Acres of Clams.

Speaker 2 (22:32):
He's always been into seafood.

Speaker 1 (22:34):
Loves he fucking loves it.

Speaker 2 (22:36):
Oh my god, I don't want acres of clams personally,
I like half a dozen.

Speaker 1 (22:41):
You could, It would take you so long to walk
over acres of clams. Okay. The final one is Margarine
has been was banned in uh British Columbia for seventy years.
You guys, you guys are not fucking happ Margarin. No,
what didn't.

Speaker 2 (23:01):
Margarine never do to you?

Speaker 1 (23:03):
The British Columbia dairy industry, it was Margarine. They banded
in eighteen eighty six. No, they only unbanded in nineteen
forty nine.

Speaker 2 (23:13):
What happened in eighteen eighty five? Everyone someone, someone who
was in charge with banning shit got a bad batch
of Margarine.

Speaker 1 (23:21):
I was like, fuck this shit. Someone like was given
a piece of toast and they bit into it and
they were like, who put vassoline on my toast? I
don't want that shit. They're like, oh, no, we're passing
off is butter Now? They're like, no, you're not.

Speaker 2 (23:34):
And when did it come back in the eighties?

Speaker 1 (23:36):
Forty nine?

Speaker 2 (23:36):
Okay, because remember how big it got in the eighties.
That was Margarine's fucking hey day. Everyone lost their shit.
Everyone's mom who was reducing Yes, going to fucking jazzer
size and Jenny Craig yep.

Speaker 1 (23:49):
Yes, that was the I can't believe it's not Butter years.

Speaker 2 (23:52):
Yeah, let's talk about that.

Speaker 1 (23:54):
I couldn't believe it it wasn't Butter.

Speaker 2 (23:58):
Let's talk about Country Crock.

Speaker 1 (24:01):
I thought it would be fun to kick off with
some trivia, local trivia. I love that. Thank you. Listen,
you did it. You guys did it. You guys name,
not thing, Jeff, not us. It was you all along. Well,
there hasn't been a Cager room name. It was lit
above us now do it as a drunk person. Oh

(24:22):
my guys. You know Jeff god On, do you know?

Speaker 2 (24:27):
Jeff?

Speaker 1 (24:30):
I sorry you about it. That's okay. Don't clap for
drunk Karen or she'll come back.

Speaker 2 (24:46):
You love it, wouldn't you?

Speaker 1 (24:49):
You would?

Speaker 2 (24:50):
I thought like a day would be great, yes, but
like I'm kidding.

Speaker 1 (24:53):
Then it would be like I have to drive. There's
a lot of that behavior. We have a clicker here.

Speaker 2 (25:04):
Vince held us not to press that, but and I'm
not gonna we don't know what happens. He called it
the ghostbuster button because there's just a circle with an
ex through in it, and we knew immediately what he meant.
Let's go off, film party starts. We'll press it as
we leave a stage. Okay, I'm stalling because all right,
this is what happens. Let me just tell you I'm first, right, yes,

(25:27):
because I chose to be because something this thing happens.
You know, you're going through your week and you're like,
I got to pick my murders for this weekend, and
you like, do this, you know, sweet steven sends you
a list of like ideas with like one line of
description in the beginning. You're like, I can't do that.
I can't do that great final do that? Like I
did fucking what did I get Dbe Cooper yesterday? It
was just like, this is what's gonna happen?

Speaker 1 (25:47):
This one did?

Speaker 2 (25:48):
It was it was fun. I had a great time.

Speaker 1 (25:51):
Well that's all that matters.

Speaker 2 (25:52):
So this one I picked and then I started and
I was dialed in, and then I started researching it.
How come no one ever told me of this one.
It's the most insane thing I've ever never heard about. Really,
I'm like obsessed with it now. It's the Abbotsford Killer.

(26:13):
What in the fuck you guys? True everyone's yelling at
us about a fucking asshole pig farmer, when meanwhile I
used to hate that guy.

Speaker 1 (26:24):
Same thing I've.

Speaker 2 (26:25):
Ever heard of in my life. Shit, Okay, and I
and it did bring me. The one thing that this
brought me that is joyful is that I listened. It's
so there's not a lot of information when you just
like articles, but there's a lot of documentaries and then
there's a couple podcast episodes about it from true crime Podcasts,

(26:45):
which brought me to my new favorite podcast. It's a
Canadian true crime and dark history podcast. Called dark poutine. Amazing, truly,
How great is that? Like you just immediately know you're
gonna like these dudes.

Speaker 1 (27:06):
It's great, it's great. I mean it is already dark.

Speaker 2 (27:11):
Right, do you have a questions? You have any questions
about it? I'll ask later. I just God bless you
for that name. Wonderful, wonderful work. So I listen on
the way from Seattle to here, and it's there's beautiful folly.

Speaker 1 (27:28):
Oh we don't have that in California, to have trees.
We don't everything burnt down. I didn't fucking do it.

Speaker 2 (27:41):
Yes, she did.

Speaker 1 (27:43):
You know, she's out there in the forest. Give me.

Speaker 2 (27:47):
I have mattress, I've masses you up, mattess. All right,
so let's get into this because she it okay, all right.
Around five point thirty in the morning on October fourteenth, Saturday,
nineteen ninety five, in Abbotsford, British Columbia, it's about an
hour from here, right on a good day, I don't know,

(28:13):
A sixteen year old girl named Misty Cockrell stumbles, bleeding, beaten,
and nearly hypothermic, into the front doors of MSA General
Hospital despite a massive fracture in her skull. She's conscious.
They said, it's the size of a fist, a hole
the size of hers. She's conscious and able to tell
them that she had just woken up near in the
parking lot right by there after having been beaten by

(28:35):
a man with a baseball bat, and that she was
with her friend at the time, sixteen year old Tanya Smith,
and Tanya's now missing. She had just woken up, come
to stumbles for the fucking horn.

Speaker 1 (28:46):
Fuck that's right.

Speaker 2 (28:48):
Despite all her injuries, she survives and later that morning
she tells police that Tanya. So this is a story.
She tells police she and Tanya had been a party
that Friday night. So it was Friday the thirteenth, and
they were to party in Surrey. They left around midnight,
got a ride closer to home, and they decided to

(29:08):
walk a few blocks to a different party a couple
of blocks from their house. And they're all joking about
it being Friday the thirteenth. Misty, who has a great
dark sense of humor, says that she joked, watch some
guy's going to jump out of the bushes and try
to rape us. Yeah, And she said that we laughed
it off and continued walking. Just a few blocks into

(29:29):
their walk. They stop when they heard a man's voice
behind them, and the guy said something like a bitches
want to party, like something terrifying. They just missed him
like some asshole, kept walking and then he did it
again and they turned around and they noticed that he
had an aluminum baseball bat in his hand. Ooh. The
guy steps out of the bushes, grabs them both by

(29:50):
the arms and then pulls them through. It's like a tall,
like thick hedge pulls them through into the parking lot.
He orders the girls to strip, and Missy doesn't move.
Tanya starts to take her clothes off, and as the
guy focuses on Tanya, Missy realizes that he had put
his baseball back down. This fucking badass chick grabs the

(30:13):
bat and swings it at him, and she hits him.
She was like, she refused to leave to run and
get help, and she just didn't want to leave her friend,
so she hits him.

Speaker 1 (30:24):
They start struggling.

Speaker 2 (30:25):
She yells for Tanya to run, but Tanya didn't want
to leave her friend either, and unfortunately, he gets a
hold of the bat and begins to hit her with it.
She says she counts seven hits before she blocks out,
oh fuck. When she comes to, and this is what
this is. Another thing she later says is she remembers

(30:45):
as she's laying on the ground after the seventh hit.
She says, I opened my eyes and I see my
high school because it was like across the street, and
I remember thinking that that's going to be the last
thing I see as my high school. But what they
don't put in that the article I read and I
had to see somewhere else is I was pissed off
because I fucking hate that place, which I was, I mean, amazing, seriously,

(31:09):
that's the first thing I thought was like, that's the
most depressing thing of all time. Yeah, oh there so,
and it's great. So these girls are sixteen and it's
nineteen ninety five, that's and they're in high school. It's
exactly my age pretty much. And I just the thought
of me being sixteen and going through this, you know,
it's insane to me that they went through this, and
that Misty was able to fucking joke about it this way.

(31:30):
It's bananas. She when she comes to when she woke
up being after passing out, she comes to, you, Tanna's gone.
She finds her way to the hospital through the front doors,
and she describes their attacker as very tall with a
receding hairline, and remembers looking into his eyes and knowing
that he and tedon on killing them. And then later
it's it's said that as she entered the emergency room

(31:52):
and stumbled in, the triage nurse caught sight of her
and began to scream, and she said, that's.

Speaker 1 (31:57):
A hard thing to do. That's really saying something. Yeah,
she's a fucking triage nurse. Yeah, she says.

Speaker 2 (32:05):
Quote. I thought, man, whoever came in behind me must
be in really rough shape. You know.

Speaker 1 (32:12):
I love her, wet baby angel shit.

Speaker 2 (32:16):
Sadly, later that morning, at about seven thirty am, fisherman
at Better Canal, which is about ten miles away, find
the naked body of Tania Smith. She had been severely beaten,
sexually assaulted, and then thrown in the river face down
or she drowned. This killer became known as the Advertsford Killer. So,

(32:36):
Abbotsford is a Bible Belt community. I think it was
really conservative at the time. I don't know if it
still is. It's like a bedroom suburb of Vancouver. It is.

Speaker 1 (32:47):
Welcome we're glad to have you.

Speaker 2 (32:53):
And so of course, I mean, like Anny Town, they're
like fucking shocked that that happens here, Like you know,
they're into Jesus and stuff. Don't say his name like that, Georgia, Jesus, Jesus. Okay,
So they're all fucking freak the fuck out over this, understandably.

(33:15):
And I grew up in a fucking Republican asked town too,
that was suburban bedroom community and that the ship would
have we have lost our minds. So a joint investigation
is launched between the Abbotsford Police and the Chili Wack RCMP.
Chili Wack, Yeah, I think you did it, Chili Wac.
I was like, I know I'm going to get that
wrong when I saw it earlier. Days after the attack, okay,

(33:40):
fuck okay. Days after the attack, they're setting up a
hotline for tips, and they get a fucking phone call.
Let me show you the girls real quick. Sorry, let's
get it like that. I look like that she has
a choker on. I wore chokers.

Speaker 1 (33:56):
Okay, it was required in the nineties.

Speaker 2 (34:00):
So they get a phone call. They're not yet taping,
so that's not recorded. The caller said, or they're taping,
but they're not tracing, thank you No. The caller says
that he's Tanga's killer and he was giving them a
chance to find him before he starts looking for his
next victim. Whoa. He gave a gruesome piece of evidence
that only the killer would know, that they had of
course kept out of the media, and that he had

(34:22):
bitten Tanya's nipple, and he tauntingly told them that it
tastes good, this fucking asshole piece of shit. So the
call is that was like the second call he had made.
That that calls traced the time police arrived at the
location the collar had fled. It was a phone booth
and they thrust it for fingerprints, can't find any, And
twenty minutes later or so, the man calls back and

(34:45):
asks if the police thought he was foolish enough to
leave fingerprints behind. So he's just fucking taunting them. At
this point, he continues to call the police to taunt
about his next kill, and when it's going to happen,
he belittles them for not being smart enough to catch him.
He's just fucking enjoying it. And in the dark Poutine
podcasts they play all the they play the what are
they called? Calls his phone, his voice and show. Oh yeah,

(35:08):
I mean he just sounds like a like a normal
It's fun, you know. It's that thing of like no
one would have known. He sounds like a normal dude,
and you think he's going to sound like a monster.
It just sounds like a fucking normal person. It's creepy.
I'm sure the town was freaking the fuck out. Da
da da da da. Okay, So the calls terrorize the
Lower Mainlan and they're gripped by fear. Inspector Rob Giel

(35:30):
described the driver case, Oops, he just gave something away
as one of the most bizarre in his twenty seven
years of police work. He says, I hope I never
see anything like it again. The way this individual taunted
the community and put this community in a state of
fear was like nothing we'd ever seen before. So a
fucking suspect, three people call in this okay, So okay,

(35:54):
A sketch gets drong? Okay, all right, Yes, composite sketch
based on Misty's description of him. There's two of them,
and these are them. Oh yeah, take a look at those.
You see those in the paper, and you're like, well,
I'm moving.

Speaker 1 (36:08):
And never leaving the house again. Looks like David Thulis,
the great British actor. Mm hmm, but you know, in
a bald cap so much just like a weasel with
a Hitler mustache.

Speaker 2 (36:26):
For folks say, so, okay, imagine this dude and you're
and three people call in and they're like, that looks
exactly like this dude. I know, and he and I
saw a video of this guy. It looks exactly like
this dude. It's so creepy.

Speaker 1 (36:42):
He's held.

Speaker 2 (36:43):
This guy's helping.

Speaker 1 (36:44):
They are like, we've got the guy.

Speaker 2 (36:45):
Looks exactly like him, and he's kind of like a
Methy like street dude.

Speaker 1 (36:50):
They hold him and you know, they have DNA and.

Speaker 2 (36:52):
They have the bitemark, so they do a dental impression,
they do the DNA testing, which it's the fucking mid nineties,
so it takes two months. They keep him in custody
that long before finding out the DNA doesn't match and
it's not him, and they have video of him like
piecing out of the fucking like he's just like later
days dude. And through that entire time, the guy had

(37:16):
stopped calling. So they were like, we've got him. But
really what probably happened was he's like, great, someone's going
to go down for this for me, So he fucking
quieted out and later sole okay. So then then the
cops are like, well, they're starting over, they need new suspects,
They need this guy to call back, so they decide

(37:37):
to put out an article taunting him on purpose. They
tell him that in the article it says like psychologist
thinks he's too scared to call again, or he's you know,
taunting him. He responds by doing this insane fucking thing.
On February seventeenth, nineteen ninety six, a call is made

(37:59):
to the local radio state and uh at Radio Max
and DJ Mike Chacone. He uh gets a call in
the guy's like, go look at the radio station car
that's got like plastered with a it's probably a pet cruiser.

Speaker 1 (38:14):
I don't know, you know, you're seeing it in your
mind's eyes. It's a purple pet cruiser exactly, but like
Radio Max across the side, across the side Big mikey
see on mornings.

Speaker 2 (38:26):
Right, And they got to like, I'm sure they go
to car sales openings and you know, dog walks. I
don't know what's a dog walks?

Speaker 1 (38:34):
Dog walks? Do you know anyway radio shows up when
you're walking your dog.

Speaker 2 (38:40):
I don't know why dog walk got in there just now.
Maybe it's because you showed me a photo from the
Circleville Pumpkin Show.

Speaker 1 (38:47):
Tell you of the animal parade in theirs of tell
him what that was? Someone was walking a duck. Did
you see it on a leash? On a leash?

Speaker 2 (38:57):
My dream is to walk a duck. Walking it back
is like, well, you know.

Speaker 1 (39:04):
On a leash?

Speaker 2 (39:04):
I said, sorry, no, it's great, Okay, this is insane. Okay,
fucking mikey c Yeah, goes out to the radio Max
car and finds that someone had tossed a concrete headstone

(39:26):
gravestone on the fucking hood of the car. It's fucking
Tanya's what the fuck?

Speaker 1 (39:34):
I fucking know, if this was a movie, I'd be like,
I'm not watching this anymore. Yes, it's stupid and bad.
It's like.

Speaker 2 (39:45):
That really, like can you imagine? Then they show mike'
se and like some old video and he's just like
some you know, like some kid guy. I'm sure he's
just like moving, I'm moving goodbye. It's insane. So he
had gone and they had fucking stolen Tanya's gravestone and
there he had there was like a photo of her
on it, and he had fucking xched messages into it

(40:08):
Jesus Christ, including saying I'm still out there. I'm the one,
and quote she wasn't the first and she won't be
the last. And then he writes one day Misty and
Missy someone that survives, and her whole family's already in
fucking protective custody or on what's it called witness protection program?
Obviously you want to see it too bad. You have
to see it.

Speaker 1 (40:29):
Whoa where is it? Right there?

Speaker 2 (40:31):
See?

Speaker 1 (40:32):
Holy shit? I know, how have we never heard of this?
The fucking pig farmer again?

Speaker 2 (40:38):
And this.

Speaker 1 (40:41):
You guys are holding back.

Speaker 2 (40:42):
All right, so and there and they're okay, hold on, okay.
The community, everyone's everyone just starts screaming, we don't blame you.
Everyone just like goes grocery shopping and lives there like

(41:03):
Moser Lawn while they're screaming terror, which I totally yeah,
we understand. Then two days later, a note taped around
a heavy runch is thrown through the front picture window
of a woman who's fucking home alone with her kids
at the time. Later determined she has nothing to do
with it. He just fucking picked a window. Inside the

(41:23):
envelope containing the note mentioned three other assaults that the
killer wanted credit for. He included clippings from the articles
and the Vancouver Son on the unsolved murders of three women,
Vancouver sex worker Linda tat Ray, Colleen Shook of Burnaby,
who was attacked after getting off a bus, and Kim Stolberg,
who was killed at her father's Richmond engineering office while

(41:47):
she was arranging a surprise fucking wedding anniversary for her parents.
All three women are stabbed to death in nineteen eighty nine,
six years earlier. But although horrified, investigators finally have a
break that they think they can use. They had the
killer left a crucial mistake behind in his fingerprint on

(42:07):
the tape that had been used to tape it together.
Yeah so, but they kept that part secret. So the
police tried many tactics to get the killer to contact
them again. They set up a sting operation in malls
and it phone boosts across the city. They have of
course recorded and staked out Tanya's funeral as well, and

(42:28):
they published bake stories, and then they had also released
a lot of info on the killer, including of course
the sketches and then parts of the recorded calls he'd make.
They were like, can someone please just fucking recognize this
goddamn voice and tell us who this is? And then
they offered a forty thousand dollars reward leading to the arrest.

Speaker 1 (42:46):
So they have this plea.

Speaker 2 (42:49):
They put the oh, they put the the voice what
who sounds like? Out and then they want to hear
it again. You have to call this eight hundred number,
and they put a fucking tap on it so that
people called more than like three times. They were just like,
why are you knock on the door, Like why are
you fucking crazy? Why are you doing this? You're like, nope,
just a murdering No, sorry, I'm just trying to solve

(43:11):
the crime for you.

Speaker 1 (43:12):
Yeah, it's kind of my passion. Anyway, great to meet you.
You look great in that jacket.

Speaker 2 (43:21):
Around this town time, a woman and her son hear
the voice and kind of lose their shit because they
fucking think they recognize it. It sounds like the woman's
son and the family. The rest of the family agrees,
but the composites get sketch looks nothing like him, so
they're like, well, maybe it's not him. Let's just call

(43:43):
it in. So they the police go to the house
and they're like, it doesn't look anything like him. We
have to check it out. Anyways, let's just have a quick, quick,
little chat with him. But the guy is sketchy as fuck,
and he refuses to give any DNA or any fingerprints
or take a light detector tests, which immediately they're like, wow,
you're stupid. So finally the dude comes in the next

(44:07):
day with a lawyer and he says that he'll give
them their his fingerprints, but they can only use it
to try to match and then they have to destroy them.
They can't use them again. They can Okay, any other
restrictions or needs that you have about giving your fingerprints,
you fucking creep, right, that's me as the secretary at

(44:27):
the police station, sassy cop operator I dig it right.
My new show, more than ninety four hundred suspects had
been questioned, and all these people had been given DNA
and fucking fingerprinted and taking dental hit And finally, when

(44:52):
this fucker comes in, they finally catch thirty one year
old terry driver and he's arrested. WHOA, that's right, yes,
I fucking god, I don't remember what else I that's him. WHOA,
it doesn't look that's so weird, And it kind of
does once you see some other photos.

Speaker 1 (45:09):
There's like a he's like, oh yeah, but the receding
hairline is that's a problem, the receding hairline. But it
cut like his nose in the couple angles, it looks
like him.

Speaker 2 (45:19):
He's just disgusting. But the Weasley picture looks nothing now
at all, anything like him. So the Matthew dude it
was held for two months, was like, fuck you bitches,
and we were like, fair enough, I was there, now
I don't know.

Speaker 1 (45:35):
So then they gave him the key to the city.

Speaker 2 (45:39):
So this fucking asshole, he's married with two children. And
the reason my hair is some pigtails is because and
I didn't have time for a shower is because just
as I was about to do that, I find that
she had done a like I married a monster episode
of something, and I was like, welp, I'm staying and
I'm watching this.

Speaker 1 (45:59):
These are the sacrifices we make in his podcast for
you guys.

Speaker 2 (46:06):
Yeah, so uh he's just a fucking dude who's married
with two children. Of course he's super controlling all this
crazy shit. He works at a print shop, he'd worked
there for five years. Of course everyone's shocked as him
and couldn't believe it. Blah blah blah. His father had
been a hero cop with the Vancouver Police Department, which
you see in.

Speaker 1 (46:25):
Every fucking article.

Speaker 2 (46:26):
But then our friend Scott at Dark Poutine is like, well,
guess what I used to fucking hang out at his
house when I was a kid. What It's insane. He
was friends with his brother. I feel like, I'm I'm
you have to listen to the episode.

Speaker 1 (46:41):
And my friend Scott told me.

Speaker 2 (46:42):
Yeah, so he knows all about these people. And he
was like, yeah, they had a room that was just
full of Nazi memorabilia.

Speaker 1 (46:50):
No, uh huh uh oh.

Speaker 2 (46:55):
So I was right about that fucking hitler mustave, wasn't
I I was.

Speaker 1 (47:00):
I was chewting it.

Speaker 2 (47:03):
I know a Nazi when I see a drawing of
a Nazi. And as when Terry was a kid at
like two years old, think of a baby at two
year old. They take him to the doctor and like,
we can't fucking manage this child like too, he doesn't
respond to you know, basic discipline. He's already like fucking

(47:24):
with people. At by five. They were like, we can't
handle him, and they put him in a home for
like badly behaved children. I'm sure there's a name for that.
That sounds like a horror movie, but that's not what
Just just behave badly.

Speaker 1 (47:43):
You're going into a home. I love that idea.

Speaker 2 (47:45):
You know, Canada's very strict and they just manners first,
is what.

Speaker 1 (47:51):
The national motto is.

Speaker 2 (47:52):
That's right, you took the last piece of margarine toast.

Speaker 1 (47:55):
You're going to school. Oh sorry, looks like you're going
to the home.

Speaker 2 (48:00):
You know.

Speaker 1 (48:00):
It's so funny. That just made me think. A girl
that I worked with, we.

Speaker 2 (48:03):
Were all talking about like crazy shit your parents lied
to you about when you're a kid, And she said
that her dad's told her that until she was ten
she could still she could.

Speaker 1 (48:13):
Be put up for adoption legally. We're all talking about
how our parents controlled us. Like my dad just had
a stare that was honestly like I think heat lasers,
because you could be doing anything and then you'd look
over and you think, oh my god, he just creep
you out from the side. Good at that, but she honestly,
until she was ten, thought she was going to be

(48:34):
given away. That's horrible parenting. But truly she made it
to Hollywood, so.

Speaker 2 (48:43):
She now craves for ratification via television writing. That's right, Okay,
So he went to the home. He's a fucking asshole.
He of course is obsessed with being a cop. He
wants to be a cop, and he's also into breaking
into houses and like stealing money from his work all
through high school. He's like a problem child. Obviously a psychopath.
He's a psycholassic half during the so they go to trial. Oh,

(49:07):
Scott also has a story Our friend Scott at Dark
Between also.

Speaker 1 (49:10):
Has a story My best friend.

Speaker 2 (49:11):
This is another insane story about how he worked at
a fucking paper recycling plant and one day through like
through the line comes like like secret files from his
pre trial that someone had decided to recycle instead of shred.
You know. It's some guy named Eric at the fucking
cops office. And he's like, no, no, I love trees.

(49:34):
So it's like it could have it could have given
him a mistrial. He could have gotten off because of this.

Speaker 1 (49:41):
He just takes it out of the regular garbage. She's like, guys,
we've talked about this, so we have to save the planet.
Let's act locally truly. Why Okay, someone at the recycling
plant was smart enough to pull that offul Line got
what he worked there?

Speaker 2 (50:00):
Yes, hold on, are you sure this doesn't have straight
up bullshit podcast?

Speaker 1 (50:06):
I don't think it is. Are you guys friends with him?

Speaker 2 (50:08):
He's real?

Speaker 3 (50:09):
Right?

Speaker 1 (50:09):
Yeah? Is he a tonal liar?

Speaker 2 (50:13):
He's our best friend. Don't call him a liar? How
bananas is that? And it's like they have like forty
something episodes. Now it's their third episode that they do.
It's fucking great.

Speaker 1 (50:24):
Okay, So what was number one? If this was number three?

Speaker 2 (50:29):
Okay, so here's the fucking trial. Of course, he testifies.
They were like, okay, they have a bite mark, they
have DNA and they have fingerprints against us. We're fucked.
Here's what we do, we say, and he fucking testifies.
I stumbled upon them, passed the fuck out. As people
say this, I raped uh and took Tanya and through

(50:51):
and when I realized she was dead and threw in
the water, and then I dropped Misty off at the
hospital unconscious and left her there, he says, he fuckings. Yeah,
it's like the bullshit story.

Speaker 1 (51:00):
Ever, well, also, he's choosing a terrible thing. It's not
like he's choosing the better option where it's just like
someone else was awful and beat them, but I was
good enough to rape and then drop yeah one not
what the fuck is the thinking.

Speaker 2 (51:14):
And it's also like after all this, like these phone
calls and taunting and like really almost like seeing like
he really is enjoying all this attention to just be
such a fucking bitch and not be like, yeah, I'm guilty.

Speaker 1 (51:27):
Yeah, classic mouve asshole he said.

Speaker 2 (51:30):
Uh. Three doctors are called to test, are called as
defense witnesses who have to be really proud of themselves
to explain driver's Terry's impulsive sexual behavior and bizarre postcrime
calls because they're like, yeah, it was me who called
and did all the other shit. They said he suffered
from the reason he did it is that he suffered
from Tourette syndrome and that no uh huh no, now

(51:54):
fuck you, No, yeah, that's not what Turette syndrome is.
I know.

Speaker 1 (52:00):
It's a special subset of Tourettes where you always pick
up the phone first. Yeah, I can feel terrible taunts
and threats coming off. Hold on, hold on, let me
call the poet, called the radio station.

Speaker 2 (52:14):
And Nadie also, and that it was also explained by
OCD and add Adhd and always like, well we all
have that.

Speaker 1 (52:22):
Yeah, everyone's handling it fine.

Speaker 2 (52:24):
Yeah. Prosecutors Sean Madigan said he wasn't. He was pissed
off without the defense using those disorders to explain away
his behavior because quote, there are a lot of people
with these afflictions and they functioned very well in society,
and I hated to see them branded the same as
the Abbotsford killer.

Speaker 1 (52:41):
Amen, fucking badass.

Speaker 2 (52:47):
Missy shows up at the trial, fucking testifies on the stand,
looks them right in the fucking face, points him out
when they ask him who did it, and fucking recounts
her entire fucking story.

Speaker 1 (52:59):
Wow, and does in.

Speaker 2 (53:00):
His buckled face, Yeah, it's amazing, incredible.

Speaker 1 (53:07):
Sorry, No, I liked it. I liked it.

Speaker 2 (53:10):
It's fine, he h Terry Drivers convicted in nineteen ninety
seven a first the first degree murder of Tanga Smith
and the attempted murder of Misty Cockerell and declared a
dangerous offender and sentenced to the mandatory term of life
in prison with no pearl for twenty five years and
another ten years concurrent prison term. And the labeling him

(53:33):
a dangerous offender means that he'd probably never fucking get
out and which is great, and the they made that
up when Paul Barndo did his fucking shithead thing. Bernardo
let her say what she wants. Barndo's a street near
where I used to live, right, that's it, where it is.
I even wrote Borndo.

Speaker 1 (53:53):
Shit shit shit shit shit in a later child.

Speaker 2 (53:59):
He's convicted of the two assaults. The two of the
assaults he mentioned in the note he threw out the
window he had also h one of those those two
are that he assaulted a mentally ill woman living in
a group home, and he hit another woman over the
head with a bat, fracturing her skull and causing permanent
brain damage. So he's convicted for those two assaults. Good after, Okay,

(54:20):
So after the trial, Misty finishes high school and receives
a scholarship for the Canadian from the Carnadian Crime Victim
Foundation to attend the What do I do.

Speaker 1 (54:34):
To attend?

Speaker 2 (54:35):
The University College of the free.

Speaker 1 (54:37):
Yeah, you made it so she can't read. I'm scared.

Speaker 2 (54:41):
She gets a BA in sociology. Yes, now she now
a day she volunteers for victim services and she said
her ordeal has made her learn a lot about herself
and the support network that's available for assault victims in
the providence. She is just coaches people and does lectures
and talks and it's just this incredible victims advocate. Now,

(55:05):
she said, quote of us victims are stigmatized to feel
sorry for themselves forever. And it was really my and
it wasn't really my thing. I didn't feel sorry for myself.
I love I know. She's a mother of two daughters
and she still lives in Abbotsford and works as has
also worked as a bereavement counselor for families of homicide victims.

Speaker 1 (55:23):
Wow, she's amazing.

Speaker 2 (55:30):
She says that being a victim of assault doesn't define
her and she prefers to see herself as a survivor
and that is the abbots for her.

Speaker 1 (55:37):
Wow.

Speaker 2 (55:38):
Wow, that is an episode of I Survived.

Speaker 1 (55:48):
No, Yeah, she's on I Survived Shit. I just realized
that when you said the thing about the hedge, it's
just a weird detail from the beginning.

Speaker 2 (55:58):
Wow, I wish I hadn't washed my bangs in the
sink and had more time to.

Speaker 1 (56:04):
Watch.

Speaker 2 (56:04):
That would get fast stuff altogether.

Speaker 1 (56:08):
Well the thing too, is there none of those details
like that the headstone thing wasn't in there.

Speaker 2 (56:13):
Jesus Christ, that's unbelievable. Yeah, I just want to talk
about the mysterious floating severed feet of the Salish Sea.

Speaker 1 (56:25):
Holy shit, it's not inspiring and it's not, you know,
a survival story. It's just fucking weird. It's a series
of weird things that people are trying to tell us
isn't a big deal and it is a goad dam
but they're trying to explain it away. They're trying to
make me not feorize that there's a very specific serial

(56:47):
killer or shark out there, yeah, doing weird shit.

Speaker 2 (56:52):
Or a fucking duo of a shark and a serial killer.

Speaker 1 (56:55):
Oh my god, a land sea duo. Yeah, a surf
turf killer duo. Yes, yes, yues Canada, you've got it all.

Speaker 2 (57:10):
Oh wait, we'll be moving here within six months.

Speaker 1 (57:13):
Wait there, someone start the paperwork.

Speaker 2 (57:15):
There's one more photo that's Missy Now there she is.

Speaker 1 (57:19):
Yep, yep, she is. She's on and I survived. She's
super badass on I survived amazing. Yeah, if you see her,
say hi to west please Abbotsford.

Speaker 2 (57:30):
I love this all right.

Speaker 1 (57:32):
Do you recognize that it's the West Coast?

Speaker 2 (57:35):
Oh?

Speaker 1 (57:35):
Yeah, it's the West coast of United States and Canada.
We've been there this entire weekend. This is where we
call our home this weekend. Up and down, up and down,
up and down.

Speaker 2 (57:45):
It's beautiful.

Speaker 1 (57:46):
Oh, we've driven hither and yon, I asked you this
was the original. But then I asked Stephen to u
zoom in. I asked him to zoom in, and this
is what I got.

Speaker 2 (58:05):
Stephen, can you make it look kind of like modern
art and not help informationally in any way?

Speaker 1 (58:10):
And he was like, I'm on it, Karen, I love you.
We'll just do that, Okay, be a little more helpful.

Speaker 2 (58:18):
Okay, God damn it.

Speaker 1 (58:21):
I got this information from the National Post, the New
York Times, a wonderful website called Atlas Obscura that I love.
Gones dot com did a really good, kind of comprehensive
thing on it, and then, of course, really my second brain, Wikipedia, Okay, I.

Speaker 2 (58:39):
Thought you were going to say, just conjecture, and.

Speaker 1 (58:43):
Then of course my own personal theory is okay. Since
August twentieth, two thousand and seven, Beachcomber's in the Greater
Vancouver area and up on along the West coast of
the United States and Canada have been finding more than
just the standard CLP piles and broken seashells washing up
on the Sandy Shores. You say, see, thank you, Wow,

(59:05):
this is why I don't have time to do my hair. Uh,
just waxing poetic on my laptop, flourish of words. I mean,
the best time I was like, what is on the beach? Oh? Well,
there's piles of kelp? Sure, and of course there's always
part of a seashell.

Speaker 2 (59:19):
That looks kind of red, and then it's just broken
you FuG and a hocket.

Speaker 1 (59:22):
But you got to mention the sand. You where would
you be without mentioning the sand? Oh, that's true, you did?
Oh I did, Yeah, Sandy Shore. So thank you. I
thought you were pointing out that I had.

Speaker 2 (59:31):
No I'm shaming you for not bringing up a fucking
with Karen. If you're on the beach and you're not
talking about the sand, I don't know you're doing it.

Speaker 1 (59:38):
Yeah, I don't even know where.

Speaker 2 (59:39):
I can't visualize where I am unless you tell me
what is there?

Speaker 1 (59:44):
Okay, but that was four to say, sixteen detached human
feet have been found along the West Coast Waterway that
connects the United States and Canada. That's sixteen. You guys,
what are you doing? Are you? What are you or
any of us doing?

Speaker 2 (59:59):
Why do we even?

Speaker 1 (01:00:00):
And all of these floating feet have had either a
running shoe or a hiking boot attached, oh except one.
Most often they are new Balanced Nike, and of course
Ozark Trail, which can be purchased at Walmart. Really yeah,
new Balance.

Speaker 2 (01:00:16):
It's like new Balance, cool Nike cool.

Speaker 1 (01:00:19):
Ozark Trail is like Timberland for poor people.

Speaker 2 (01:00:22):
Got it? It looks exactly the same people who weren't
brand Whose right exactly?

Speaker 1 (01:00:27):
Maybe people aren't so materialistic, Karen.

Speaker 2 (01:00:30):
They don't need a fucking label to define them labels.

Speaker 1 (01:00:37):
Exactly?

Speaker 2 (01:00:38):
Thank you?

Speaker 1 (01:00:38):
Am I right? Thank you? Labels?

Speaker 2 (01:00:41):
Thank you?

Speaker 1 (01:00:41):
That reminds me this is very random. But when I
got into the elevator at our hotel as the doors
were closing, I don't know why I want to just
be in the elevator by myself, so bad, but I
really do. And when the doors are closing and someone
throws their arm out.

Speaker 2 (01:00:55):
Would you say, sorry, nothing pretended?

Speaker 1 (01:00:57):
Did you say, did you fart?

Speaker 2 (01:01:00):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (01:01:01):
I mean I do, but not that time.

Speaker 2 (01:01:03):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (01:01:04):
As the doors are closing, this old lady throws an
arm out and gets in with me. And she's got
a Chanel purse and I think a Chanelle scarf. She
smell really rich. She had a lot of things on.
But she goes what floor, And I was like, said
the floor, and then she goes boom, whoa b And
then when she got off on her floor, she went goodbye.

Speaker 2 (01:01:28):
She's aggressively polite.

Speaker 1 (01:01:31):
And also I could have pressed my own button like
she didn't. She ran that elevator for us, So then
I didn't regret letting her on. Uh Chanelle ladies and gentlemen, No, no, okay.
We go now to the first reported incident. On August twentieth,
two thousand and seven, on Jedediah Island, a girl visiting

(01:01:52):
from Washington is walking along the beach and she picks
up a blue and white size twelve Adita shoe with
a sock inside. Hi she told her friend she'd bring
her a present back from her trip to Canada, Like,
that's not a bad question, right, Why why? She's a

(01:02:13):
curious mind. She's in an inquiring mind. Have you ever
picked up a fucking random shoes.

Speaker 2 (01:02:19):
That's an old shoe? Well, she's like, perhaps there's some
treasure in here. That's true. It could be full of
you don't know, it could be full of doaballoons or something.

Speaker 1 (01:02:32):
But no, instead, there was a sock in there. And
then when she opened the sock, why, why, Well, if
you're gonna do it, go all the way and inside
the sock is a man's right foot. Six days later,
on Gabriola Island, a couple isn't that the best island?

(01:02:52):
Her feet?

Speaker 2 (01:02:54):
Uh?

Speaker 1 (01:02:57):
So gorgeous.

Speaker 2 (01:03:00):
A couple find a men's size twelve white rebox shoe
with a foot inside.

Speaker 1 (01:03:05):
It's gonna it's always gonna end.

Speaker 2 (01:03:06):
Like, okay, I'll stop being surprised by it. I thought,
at least once you give me an empty one. This
fucking story, can you please pepper them in?

Speaker 1 (01:03:18):
It's so funny because when you think about it, like
a single shoe laying there is a very disturbing site.

Speaker 2 (01:03:24):
That's true.

Speaker 1 (01:03:25):
You're like, so someone's running and their shoe came off.
What they didn't go back for it? Like, what emergency
happened here? What story needs to be told? Yeah, so
it's bad enough with just the shoe alone on the beach.
Then you're like a wet sock.

Speaker 2 (01:03:43):
Yeah. Then you unwrap it like a present.

Speaker 1 (01:03:47):
Yeah, she's like, oh my god, my friend Deanna's gonna
love the Oh sh shoot Dianna, God damn it. Now
I have to get her a sweatshirt. Oil Canadian Mounted
Police officer Gary Cox is quoted as saying finding one
foot is like a million to one odds. Finding two
is crazy.

Speaker 2 (01:04:08):
Oh coxy, little coxy Gary, Gary. You Gary.

Speaker 1 (01:04:14):
I feel like if you're going to be giving press quotes,
you're gonna want to tighten up the language a little bit. Mary.

Speaker 2 (01:04:20):
As a police officer, we don't like to let the
press know we're surprised by anything that's kind of against
what we do.

Speaker 1 (01:04:27):
Try to do a thing where you're hand you're acting
like you're handling it. Yeah, you're not as shocked as
the twelve year old girl who found the foot. Maybe
put your hand on your hip. Yeah, use the word
location and observe stuff like that vehicle They love to say, vehicle.
Pretend like you've seen some shit. Yeah, as my friend

(01:04:49):
my Dalky used to say, act like you've been in
the end zone before. I like that.

Speaker 2 (01:04:55):
It's football, right.

Speaker 1 (01:05:00):
That's right, Georgia, Thank you sports. Six months later, on
February eighth, two thousand and eight, a third foot in
a size eleven white and blue men's Nike running shoe
is found on Valdez Island, also a right foot. Then,
on May twenty second, two thousand and eight, a right

(01:05:20):
foot is found inside a women's white and blue New
Balanced running shoe on Kirkland Island.

Speaker 2 (01:05:27):
No nobody.

Speaker 1 (01:05:30):
I like that belongs to Costco.

Speaker 2 (01:05:31):
They don't like it.

Speaker 1 (01:05:32):
Yeah, they're like those cheap genes. We hate that shit.

Speaker 2 (01:05:37):
That was weird because usually there's a sound or anything.
At least one sad persons.

Speaker 1 (01:05:41):
Yeah, it sounded like everyone held their breath at one time.
They're just like, she's not talking about Kirkland Island? Is
she not tonight? We won't have it.

Speaker 2 (01:05:52):
That one is off limits, talk about literally anything else.

Speaker 1 (01:05:55):
Dare talk about my Kirkland Island like that.

Speaker 2 (01:05:58):
A month later, another is found on Westham Island.

Speaker 1 (01:06:03):
Right, thank you. Now we know everything's okay with West'm
fucking island. It's a left men's blue and white Nike
running shoe and it's eventually matched through DNA to the
right foot that was found on Valdez Island in February.
They're across the channel from each other, and eventually they're
identified as belonging to a Surrey man who'd been missing

(01:06:24):
since two thousand and six. In November of two thousand
and eight, a left women's blue and white New Balance
running shoe is found on Kirkland Island. No nice, she's
doing it again. Don't do it. Leave right alone. This
shoe matches the right shoe found in May and is

(01:06:46):
linked by DNA to a woman who'd been missing since
two thousand and four. So a lot. Eventually, when people
start theorizing, I mean this is now We're up to
like six feet and.

Speaker 2 (01:06:56):
Shoes and people are just start screaming.

Speaker 1 (01:06:58):
Yeah, people are like, this is quite something. It was.
It had actually sorry made the make sure I don't
pick up my trivia and start talking about Jeff anymore.
It had made headlines from newspapers all around the world.
The Melbourne Harold's Son, The Guardian in London, Cape Times

(01:07:19):
in South Africa. Everybody's talking about these shoes and feet.
You guys, they know about you, and they're so proud
of you. And it's called the series of discoveries, is
called astounding and almost beyond explanation. And actually one night
on for a while on Letterman, Remember Letterman. Letterman used

(01:07:43):
to anytime there was a Canadian guest on, he would
ask him about the second Oh, he would just check
in and see if they knew anything amazing.

Speaker 2 (01:07:50):
He's the original hometown exactly.

Speaker 1 (01:07:55):
Okay. So on June eighteenth, two thousand and eight, another
human foot is discovered on Tayy Spit near Campbell River
on Vancouver Island. It was a hoax. I'm so sorry.
It was actually a skeletonized animal paw that was put
into a sock and a shoe and then stuffed with

(01:08:17):
dried seaweed. These sons of.

Speaker 2 (01:08:19):
Bitches by the biggest fucking asshole in the entire world, Like,
you know, what's fun?

Speaker 1 (01:08:27):
What a severed feet? Did they catch you at it?
Royal Canadian Mounted Police, I wonder if it was Gary
launched an investigation in the hoax and an arrest could
be made due to charges of public mischief. No but
that was ten full years ago, so I bet we
haven't heard nothing happened.

Speaker 2 (01:08:46):
Oh he's grown up and he's sorry.

Speaker 1 (01:08:48):
He's Oh what if he goes to church every morning
because of it?

Speaker 2 (01:08:51):
Mm? Then I mean it's not that bad.

Speaker 1 (01:08:55):
That's what I'm saying. He's overreacting. Yeah, you know how
men are? You know that guy? Okay, I'm on that one.
Less than a year later, in October, I mean this, sorry,
this is a series of these. Less than a year later,
in October two thousand and nine, a right foot in

(01:09:16):
the size an eight and a half white blue and
red men's Nike running shoe is found in the Fraser River,
and this is eventually linked to a man who had
gone missing a year before then. On August twenty seventh,
twenty ten, so like six months later, in Washington State,
a woman's right foot without a shoe or sock. You

(01:09:37):
wooed at the wrong time. I know, I know you
didn't mean it. It's found on Whidby Island. The whole
island's here, so many people.

Speaker 2 (01:09:51):
They canoed over from Camp Camp Wigby.

Speaker 1 (01:09:58):
The current's going against us. It had been in the
water for two months and when they checked the DNA,
there was no match in the national database. Then about
six months later, December fifth, on the title Flats of Tacoma, Washington.
I mean, it's a weird, cheering situation, right because you

(01:10:20):
love your city. And then here comes some foot news.
A right foot inside a boy's six ozark trail hiking
buddhas discovery, but police say it could have been worn
by a juvenile or a small adult female.

Speaker 2 (01:10:40):
It's not still sucks, Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:10:43):
It doesn't make anybody feel better.

Speaker 2 (01:10:45):
No. Then on.

Speaker 1 (01:10:49):
So like eight months later, August thirtieth, a men's size
nine left foot is found in a men's white and
blue running shoe in the lagoon near the Plaza of Nations. Yeah,
the lower leg bones were still attached, so we're actually
now talking about part of a leg that was sound,

(01:11:10):
but it had that shoe. So we're going to include
it in the series just in case. On November fourth,
a group of campers find a right foot in a
men's size twelve hiking boot in sassamat Lake Great in
Port Moody. This will eventually be matched through DNA to
a sixty five year old fisherman who'd been missing since

(01:11:31):
nineteen eighty seven. Isn't that nuts? Are you choking? No way,
that's crazy shit.

Speaker 2 (01:11:39):
It was swallowing you.

Speaker 1 (01:11:42):
Just take across the table, let's see. On December tenth,
I mean it just keeps coming. It's like once a month.
They try to tell us that doesn't mean something. It
fucking does. On December tenth, a leg, bone and a
foot are found in a plastic bag under the Ship
Canal Bridge in Lake Union, Seattle. Did you hear about

(01:12:05):
the foot and leg? Yes? Yeah, that's why I ring.
We are.

Speaker 2 (01:12:21):
A fuck. This is our job. It's so fun. Listen,
if we're over hiring you guys should get a job
on this.

Speaker 1 (01:12:33):
That's pretty sweet. It's so good. In Vancouver, on January
twenty sixth, twenty twelve, human bones inside a boot are
found along the waterline at the dog park near the
Maritime Museum. Yeah, I mean, yeah, it's convoluted that one,
because it's a bummer. But then you know, the dogs
were kind of into it.

Speaker 2 (01:12:56):
They can't help it. They don't know bones.

Speaker 1 (01:13:00):
Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah. In October twenty twelve, a right
foot in a white and blue men's tennis shoe is
found in False Creek. DNA analysis. That's very tasteful of
you False Creek.

Speaker 2 (01:13:12):
They're like, woa, whoa, whoa, we're here.

Speaker 1 (01:13:15):
We're here, but we're being respectful of random feet. DNA
analysis links this to the left foot that had been
found the year before, also in False Creek. So in Seattle,
on May sixth, twenty fourteen, a left human foot in
men's size ten and a half white New Balance shoes
with a blue trim, or it's just the one shoe,

(01:13:36):
it's one foot wearing one shoe is found along the
shoreline of Centennial Park near Peer eighty six grain terminal.

Speaker 2 (01:13:45):
Jesus, the hits keep coming.

Speaker 1 (01:13:46):
I mean it doesn't end. So then there's a little
bit of a break. And then about two years later,
February seventh, twenty sixteen, a left foot is found in
a black, gray and blue New Balance running shoe on
the Botanical Beach in Botanical Beach on Vancouver Island, Vancouver Island,
you already cheered. On February twelfth, right foot is found

(01:14:10):
in the same color and type of New Balance shoe
on Botanical Beach and DNA matches it to the left
foot that had been discovered five days before. I mean,
here's the thing, there's no other body parts being reported, Yeah,
washing up anymore? Just feet, feet and more fucking feet.

Speaker 2 (01:14:27):
Yeah, it's enough to be creepy as fuck.

Speaker 1 (01:14:30):
They want to explain it away, yeah, which I'm going
to do very soon and ruin everything, but god, damn it.

Speaker 2 (01:14:36):
Great. On December eighth, twenty seventeenth, great, great, the remains
of a leg and a foot inside a shoe washed
up on Vancouver Island near the Jordan River, and they
were able to match the DNA to a man who'd
gone missing two months earlier. Then on May sixth of
this year, a man, Yeah, a man discovers a hiking

(01:14:58):
boot with a foot inside, wedged into a log jam
on Gabriola Islands. What was he doing in a log jam? Why?
Who found it?

Speaker 1 (01:15:07):
I mean, oh, he's got this weird perversion. We shouldn't
talk about it. Okay, some of my business.

Speaker 2 (01:15:13):
None of my business.

Speaker 1 (01:15:14):
Haven't you ever seen logjam porn? Okay? So here's some
of the theories. They ruined all the fun. When I
first heard about this, when like the articles started coming
out of like, what is this series of severed feet?
And I was like, yeah, oh my god. And then
of course immediately people are like, well, if you die

(01:15:37):
in the water somehow, and in that area there's lots
of bridges, and so there are suicides of people that
decide to jump off a bridge. And apparently the muscles
and the things around your ankles are one of the
weaker parts. So your feet disarticulate, that's a word I
use constantly, disarticulate from the rest of the body early.

(01:16:00):
And if you're wearing a running shoe or a hiking boot,
there's so much plastic on it it flips and floats.
And apparently those these types of things feet and shoes
can float for thousands of miles on the water.

Speaker 2 (01:16:16):
And then they find a fucking unsuspecting twelve year old.

Speaker 1 (01:16:19):
Yes on a beach, just trying to be on vacation,
to need.

Speaker 2 (01:16:21):
Therapy for the rest of their lives.

Speaker 1 (01:16:25):
So some people think disaster. So it's victims of tsunamis
that are around the world, plane crashes, boat accidents. We
know people fall off of cruise ships a lot, and
it's not talked about. We need to talk about it more.

Speaker 2 (01:16:40):
Yeah, like right now.

Speaker 1 (01:16:42):
They just disappear off of cruise ships. Should we talk
about it right now? Yes?

Speaker 2 (01:16:47):
Yeah, let's never go on a cruise. Okay, I feel
like if we had it, my favorite murder cruise, which
has been pitched to us by our agent, if anyone
buys tickets, we'll be like, you're not a listener, you
should buy no better.

Speaker 1 (01:17:00):
Yeah, you should know that if you get on that
cruise ship you will be killed. Yeah, you'll be disappeared
off that ship.

Speaker 2 (01:17:07):
Our agent's like, for some reason, you're not selling any
tickets to this thing, or like, that's fucking right.

Speaker 1 (01:17:12):
They're as paranoid as we are. Yeah, Spencer Davis wrote
in The Pacific Standard, when a body floating in water
is subjected to the push and pull of its environment,
the bones of hands and feet, Oh I said that already,
Or oh, it's Spencer Davis's idea. They're always the first
to fall off. And then this particular current it's a
it's you know, it's a it's a strong and common one.

(01:17:36):
That's the like the very.

Speaker 2 (01:17:41):
So it's like there's the great Pacific garbage.

Speaker 1 (01:17:43):
Patch, right, that's over here. Then there's foot island over here.
H You do the math, and.

Speaker 2 (01:17:52):
Which one's the one that's kicked the booth that's kicking
the No, that's Italy that's Italy.

Speaker 1 (01:17:58):
I know some people theorize that drug dealers are organized
crime members.

Speaker 2 (01:18:06):
Are they called members? They have membership cards or the organization, right,
the members of the organization organized crime. They use this
area specifically as a dump site. Huh, because you've heard
of the very powerful arm of the Gambino crime family
here in British Columbia.

Speaker 1 (01:18:25):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, they're everywhere.

Speaker 2 (01:18:28):
U crazy. So there's those are all the kind of
the explanations, and they're probably all a little right, yeah, I.

Speaker 1 (01:18:35):
Mean it's those are they're reasonable?

Speaker 2 (01:18:37):
Yeah, but let's do their unreasonable one, okay, because those
are way less depressing.

Speaker 1 (01:18:43):
Now listen, nobody mentions this part, which I think is
pretty fucking key, that right here in Vancouver there's a
shopping center called Legan Boot Square. Not ah, yes there is,
and there's a reason it's called fucking Legan Boot Square.
And that's because any eighteen eighty seven, a boot with
a leg in it washed up on the shores of

(01:19:04):
False Creek. Now, uh wait, let me see if I
have a picture of a boot from eighteen eighty seven. No,
hold on, no, those are just shoes.

Speaker 2 (01:19:16):
Stephen, Stephen, we know what shoes look like, oh, Stephen
just wanted to fucking he had a date.

Speaker 1 (01:19:24):
You wanted to get it over with. It's like, Karen,
is this okay? You're talking about shoes? Right? Okay? None
of these shoes have been found with feet in them,
but but they're all available for purchase online.

Speaker 2 (01:19:44):
If you had to choose one, I guess.

Speaker 1 (01:19:46):
I choose on yellow one. There's that boot that's a
boot from eighteen eighty seven. I don't know if it's
the boot that was found. It's in good condition. Uh.

Speaker 2 (01:19:57):
Also I love the fact that the picture gets cut
off before the.

Speaker 1 (01:19:59):
Act a shoe part is involved.

Speaker 2 (01:20:02):
Yeah, if you had to spend one night with that
boot on, where.

Speaker 1 (01:20:09):
Would you go to get?

Speaker 2 (01:20:10):
What would you do? What would you have for dinner?
Can I come?

Speaker 1 (01:20:15):
I guess I'd have acres of clowns? Call back?

Speaker 2 (01:20:20):
That's what that is? Boom? Now where am i? Oh?

Speaker 1 (01:20:24):
Legan? Boot Square the amazing shopping center that I saw
six pictures of online, so gorgeous. Why do they name
a whole?

Speaker 2 (01:20:32):
Okay?

Speaker 1 (01:20:32):
Because I'm telling you great.

Speaker 2 (01:20:34):
Somebody found a leg in a boot in eighteen eighty seven,
and the cops, the local constables, they didn't want to
go out and actually find who it belonged to. So
they took the leg in the boot and they stuck
it on a pike and left it in front of
the precinct office. It just looks like a wanted poster,
but it's just the actual have you.

Speaker 1 (01:20:52):
Seen have you seen your own leg?

Speaker 2 (01:20:56):
Oh my god. And then after two weeks they threw
it out because no one claimed it. Did they recycle
it recycling center.

Speaker 1 (01:21:05):
That's right, Peyton. Then Scott found it, that's right. Then
Scott at the recycling center is like, you gotta be
kidding me. I have to start a podcast. My life
is nuts. So my theory is that the ghost of
the person whose leg was in the Legan boot has
come back to recavoc on the police who never solved

(01:21:25):
his miss Thank you. What I'm saying is, take the facts,
take the information, and give me something. No one wants
to talk about suicide. Let's talk about ghost revenge. That's
the shit.

Speaker 2 (01:21:40):
Yes, yes, in twenty sixteen, Okay, but they still named
an entire show, okay, le Center.

Speaker 1 (01:21:51):
I mean it also seems like no one knew what
that name was. No, you're just calling it Legan Boot,
and you're just like why do they call it that?
I don't know anyway, I'm WEIRDO named it. This is
the reality check part from twenty sixteen. Corner Barb McClintock
told the Canadian Press that the most of the feet
are the remains of people who died because of accidents
or suicide. Of the twelve feet that had been discovered

(01:22:11):
at the time of this publication, ten had been linked
to seven individuals, and she says, quote, we pretty well
think we know what happened in every case. They're all
very sad. But since that article was printed, two more
human feet have been found in the area. So let's
not give up hope that it's a ghost shark. It's

(01:22:34):
the ghost of a shark, oh, coming back for revenge.

Speaker 2 (01:22:38):
With his serial killer buddy. Yes, if he rides the
ghost shark.

Speaker 1 (01:22:43):
Yes. And then yep.

Speaker 2 (01:22:46):
One day and it's the ghost of the boot guy.
Yep on the ghost shark. Right, it's two ghosts now
heading to leg in boot Square to pick up his leg.
And that is the story of the loading severed feet
of this sale ish.

Speaker 1 (01:23:01):
Sue, good job, thank you. Wait, oh, Steven, that's a Timberland.

Speaker 2 (01:23:15):
You don't have job paid Timberland prices when you can
get Ozark trail.

Speaker 1 (01:23:20):
Yeah, there's no need to do it.

Speaker 2 (01:23:21):
Are we gonna have to pay royalties to use those photos? Y?

Speaker 1 (01:23:25):
Shit? I think so.

Speaker 2 (01:23:26):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:23:27):
I think they have time for a home that's look
us here, it's my husband microphone on.

Speaker 2 (01:23:40):
Yeah, awesome, I forgot the president for the hometown people
that bring it.

Speaker 1 (01:23:45):
No, I'll run and grab it.

Speaker 2 (01:23:47):
Okay, we got you guys at present. Whoever does it?

Speaker 1 (01:23:50):
The name of the porn movie in Big Lebowski is
called log Jabbin.

Speaker 2 (01:23:53):
Oh right, and Canada does not have Southwest Airlines?

Speaker 1 (01:24:00):
Is that true? I think from now on we need
Vince to sit on the stage with a laptop and
like ahead, Mike.

Speaker 2 (01:24:09):
Corrections corner's corner.

Speaker 1 (01:24:11):
Yes please, I'm gonna go get the fruit skewer. Thank you.

Speaker 2 (01:24:15):
Okay, then's everyone so shore manager to the stars. Oh,
we're gonna brief you very quickly.

Speaker 1 (01:24:25):
I know we really don't have to because you're Canadian
and you're very polite. But here's the deal, and I
think you already know it. For the hometown murders, we
love it when it's local. If it can be a
Vancouver story, definitely a British Columbia story. That's what we want.
You think, No, it doesn't matter. My story is great
and I'm from Chicago. Fuck you, it's our answer. Shut up.

(01:24:50):
That is what we say to that. Don't be so drunk.
Don't be so drunk that you can't follow your own
line of thinking. It should be quick, beginning, middle and end.
Its people always love a nice ending. So if you
can tell us what happened, where the people ended up,
if they ever serve time, whatever, that's good. And remember

(01:25:11):
that if you get picked, everyone else hates you, so
you have to go nice and fast and keep it quick.

Speaker 2 (01:25:17):
All right.

Speaker 1 (01:25:17):
I think that's it, Thanks Vince. So here it is
stopped in a little thank you.

Speaker 2 (01:25:22):
Thank you that has this like adorable tiny little like
fruit stand mart and they and I freaked the funk
out when I saw this. It's just a skewer with
like fruit candy and like gummy weren't gummy candy, so
it looks like fruit but it's not fruit, but it's candy.

Speaker 1 (01:25:37):
Do you guys? Do you guys have candy here?

Speaker 2 (01:25:41):
So we're and Karen goes hometown present. It was the
best you're picking tonight, Okay, So can we get the
lights wrap so Karen can get a good good look
at y'all.

Speaker 1 (01:25:54):
I'm gonna feel it.

Speaker 2 (01:25:55):
I'm gonna do it more with mysh. Oh my god,
oh hi, Hi back there, so exciting. You're gonna jump okay,
which you were?

Speaker 1 (01:26:09):
Okay?

Speaker 2 (01:26:09):
Can you turn the lights down because she'll freak out
if she sees all these people.

Speaker 1 (01:26:13):
Thank you.

Speaker 2 (01:26:14):
It's terrible, It's truly terrifying.

Speaker 1 (01:26:23):
Hi Alexei, it's Lexi.

Speaker 2 (01:26:28):
Everybody say hi to Lexile here take this, come stand here.

Speaker 4 (01:26:36):
Holy shit, leg in boot lady bootes.

Speaker 1 (01:26:40):
Yes, yes, yes, yes, she's the ghost. I rolled my
ghost shark all the way here.

Speaker 2 (01:26:46):
Nice, thank you.

Speaker 1 (01:26:48):
Where are you from?

Speaker 2 (01:26:49):
I'm from Vernon, British Columbia, which is yeah what Apple Kanaka?

Speaker 4 (01:26:56):
So it's about I don't know, a five hour drive
from here. Oh so, so my hometown is actually very cool.
It is a mass murderer. Oh that is cool. I mean,
it's it's not cool, but.

Speaker 2 (01:27:08):
Yeah, yeah we know, yeah, we really know. You didn't great.
I want to be over here.

Speaker 4 (01:27:13):
So in April of nineteen ninety six, Mark Chahale left Burnaby.
What a no, it's frye fuck that and drove in
his car to the Klonna Airport.

Speaker 2 (01:27:31):
At the Kolona Airport, she's a security screener.

Speaker 4 (01:27:40):
At the Colonna Airport. He then rented a van and
drove the rest of the way to Vernon. The reason
he was going to Vernon is because he was going
to take revenge on his estranged wife who had been
living with her family there and they were preparing for
her sister's wedding. So in his car he had thirty

(01:28:04):
eight caliber semi automatic Smith and Wesson handgun, forty caliber
Smith and Wesson revolver, and something else gage shotgun.

Speaker 1 (01:28:15):
Yes, fifteen or sixteen? Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, okay, yeah yeah,
those ones are the worst.

Speaker 4 (01:28:25):
So he arrived at the family home at about ten
thirty in the morning. He took both handguns out of
the car and walked up the drive where his ex
father in law was washing one of the cars. He
then shot him in the face, and then he fired
into the home through the front window and then went

(01:28:48):
through the house. He shot everybody.

Speaker 1 (01:28:51):
Oh my god. He shot his ex wife.

Speaker 4 (01:28:53):
Her sister, her grandmother, the only people that he spared
with the children.

Speaker 2 (01:28:59):
Which is nice. He fuck.

Speaker 4 (01:29:03):
He fired twenty eight shots while he was in the house,
and then he left through the back door. The neighbors
called the police. By the time the police arrived, six
people were dead. Later three more died in hospital. After
he left, he drove back to his hotel that he
had rented, and it seemed like he had planned on escaping,

(01:29:28):
and instead he changed his mind. He wrote a suicide
note and killed himself.

Speaker 2 (01:29:32):
There.

Speaker 1 (01:29:34):
Yeah, I mean yeah, and that's the end. Oh my god,
perfectly perfectly did you? Oh my good Lexi everybody you
did it? You that was looking more fine and really fast. Wow,

(01:29:58):
Jesus Christ. See this joke gets hard.

Speaker 2 (01:30:02):
Sometimes so too, and that's because that's awful and we
hate it and it's terrible, but it's this kind of
little way for us to connect. And also because so
many of us have this anxiety because we are well
fucking aware that horrible things happen to people all the time,
and we are not fucking stuck up enough to think
that we couldn't be those people too, So we have

(01:30:23):
this crazy anxiety. But what we love about this community
that's come together is that with each other, we've shown
each other that we're all into this fucking insane thing
and have fascinated with it, but also all have this
crazy anxiety. And what we love about this podcast is
so many people thank us and tell us that they
have sought help for that crazy anxiety because we're so

(01:30:45):
open about it, which is just I mean, the fact
that they thank us is ridiculous and hilarious and wonderful.
But it does mean a lot to us that you
guys connect with each other through that anxiety and take
care of it because it's important yeh, mental health.

Speaker 1 (01:31:00):
Yeah, And we also we like to take this time
just to say, you know, we do understand and realize
that we're the luckiest people in the world. We three
years ago just thought it would be fun, just like
the dark Poutine. Guys, we thought it would be fun
just to get together and talk about this thing that
we love to talk to each other about so much.

(01:31:21):
And now we get to go on you know, world
fucking tours and we get to meet amazing people that
are just like us, that have the same interests and
the same passions and the same you know, everything. And
then we get to watch you guys all meet and
connect with each other, which is probably the most beautiful
part of all of it. Like people walking up and

(01:31:41):
saying because of you, I now have this best friend.
Because if you, I'm closer to my sister. Me and
my mom listen to this together like it's just the
coolest thing in the world and we're so lucky. So
thank you very very much for being here with us.

Speaker 2 (01:31:56):
Thank Cover Canada. We fucking love you guys, so let
you support the shit out of us. Will always will
always come here on our tour. Thank you guys so
much for being here tonight. It's been incredible.

Speaker 1 (01:32:07):
Thank you and Stay Sexy and Dunn Bote you guys.
Thank you