March 17, 2025 • 38 mins
Jay Shetty has spent years uncovering the secrets to success, happiness, and love - but what has actually changed his life?
On My Legacy, hosts Martin Luther King III, Arndrea Waters King, Marc Kielburger, and Craig Kielburger sit down with Jay and his wife, Radhi Devlukia, for a game-changing conversation packed with insights you’ll actually use.
Jay shares the biggest wake-up calls from his podcast guests, how to stop your past from determining your future, and the simple mindset shifts that will boost your confidence and sense of control. Meanwhile, Radhi reveals three easy health changes that will transform your energy, focus, and overall well-being - starting today.
Don’t miss Part 2 of this incredible conversation on My Legacy!
Creator and Executive Producer: Suzanne Hayward
Co-Executive Producer: Lisa Lisle
Editor Duane Fogwell
Post-production producer Tina Pittaway
A/V by A. Britton Dream Production Co.
Produced in partnership with iHeart Podcasts and Executive Producer Gabrielle Collins.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:04):
You've interviewed some of the most remarkable people in the world.
I like to ask you if there's one or two
things that have really impacted your thinking.
Speaker 2 (00:12):
I definitely think about a lot of the incredible experts
we've had on sleep. And the reason I bring up
sleep is because I think it's the one habit that
incredibly impacts every other habit. When you get a good
night's sleep, you're less likely to eat foods that are
(00:34):
bad for you, You're more likely to have the energy
to work out, You're going to feel more motivated and
focused at work. It's the domino effect. And so for me,
the things I've learned about sleep, the first.
Speaker 3 (00:47):
Is Hello Loves. I'm Andrea Waters King, and that was
Jay Shetdy sharing a truth that we all need to hear.
Welcome back to my legacy. Last week we explored love.
Today we explore something just as powerful, wisdom. Ja Shetty
and Roddy Deblukia open up about the teachings that shape them,
(01:09):
the struggles that tested them, and the daily habits that
guy I'm joined by my husband, Martin Luther King, the
third eldest son of doctor Martin Luther King Junior, and
Coretta Scott King, along with our good friends New York
Times best selling authors Mark and Craig Kilberger. Let's pick
up right where we left off. You're a great lesson
(01:31):
in the languages of love, yes, and acknowledging that you
know that we all love different ways and we receive
love differently. You all kind of ask of what language
does Roddy speak and show love? Or what language does
Jay speak? And then how can I show them love
in my language? And I just think that's such a beautiful,
(01:53):
beautiful thing. And laughter. I love that you know you
all are you know the laughter that you continue to bring,
and I know that in our relationship that laughter is foundational.
Speaker 4 (02:10):
If you didn't you cry, yeah, exactly.
Speaker 5 (02:13):
Especially you know, when I first met Andrea, she was
she was a serious as border health, serious health. That's
pretty serious. Serious Andrea when she was twenty ish, like.
Speaker 6 (02:29):
I said, she she was like really serious.
Speaker 5 (02:32):
I don't know if I saw that, but all of
a sudden, over the last like five years, she is
becoming one of the most funny, prey people that I know,
one of the most funniest persons, And it just adds
so much to to our lives and people don't know
my dad was humorous, got that from his mother. They
see him as as very serious, which he always was publicly,
(02:55):
but he also was extraordinarily humorous.
Speaker 3 (02:57):
Rod he's the comedian in our relation that was going
to be so, what are some things that she does
to make you wear?
Speaker 4 (03:04):
Oh?
Speaker 6 (03:04):
My god.
Speaker 2 (03:05):
Rather, he's the kind of person that wakes up in
the morning, does a random dance move, like just for fun,
I walk into the kitchen, there's no music playing, there's
no music playing, but rather he's having a full on
party just in her head.
Speaker 6 (03:18):
Yeah, And it's so much fun to watch.
Speaker 2 (03:19):
And just someone who's always looking at the bright side
of life, someone who's always so well.
Speaker 4 (03:28):
The time you're painting me out to be, I can
be a lot.
Speaker 7 (03:30):
It's okay, no you can't.
Speaker 2 (03:33):
She's but just yeah, she's hilarious in every possible way.
She's making funny jokes.
Speaker 6 (03:38):
Everyone knows.
Speaker 2 (03:38):
Anyone who follows Rather on social media knows that she's hilarious.
And and my team finds it really funny because on
Valentine's Day or on our anniversary or whatever, I'll write
these like long, soppy, romantic, heartfelt messages because that's who
I am and RADI will post an AI video of
me twerking.
Speaker 6 (03:59):
I'm not joking, it's.
Speaker 7 (04:01):
Will we share that on social media? Is that available?
Speaker 6 (04:05):
Malletine's day? Okay?
Speaker 2 (04:06):
I was like, literally, I wrote this beautiful post and
she's got a video of AI.
Speaker 4 (04:10):
You're a PDA person.
Speaker 6 (04:12):
Yeah, I struggle with that.
Speaker 7 (04:14):
I love the description in this image in the morning,
you walking in dancing into the morning kitchen. So I'm
the type of guy who rolls out of bed and
you got.
Speaker 6 (04:23):
To drag me into the kitchen.
Speaker 7 (04:24):
I never loved cooking, so I got to be candid
here writing your book Joyful, You focus on conscious cooking
and the energy that we bring into our food. Is
someone who sees cooking as a chore. How can we
turn that into much more of a joyful practice?
Speaker 4 (04:40):
I well to be fair the morning thing. I am
a morning person. I always have them. My mum has
trained me to always wake up early. Didn't like it
when I was younger, but I really appreciate it now
because mornings are definitely my favorite time of day, So
I think that's at my advantage. I definitely jump out
of bed and I'm ready to go from the second
them away. But how do I the Christians cooking.
Speaker 7 (05:03):
It's a joyful practice. It's so cool.
Speaker 4 (05:07):
Because I think after learning about Avader and also again
watching my mom and my grandma cook throughout my whole life,
I realize that it is so much more than just
feel for the body like what It is such an
act of service, and through that act you can share
so much love in it, Like whenever you think about
(05:28):
I deeply believe that the reason most of us feel
if our parents used to cook for us, that something
tasted so good and you felt, you feel that warmth
and that love through the food that someone's cooked for you.
There is an actual energetic force that goes into the
food that you're cooking when you're cooking it. And even
in Irada, it talks about how the energy that you
have when you're touching the food, when you're cooking the food,
(05:50):
when you're preparing the food, how you are feeling, the
thoughts you're thinking, the energy that you have, the emotion
that you're feeling, has the ability to be transferred into
the food that you are creating for that person. And
so when I learned that, I was like, that is
phenomenal because you can literally heal someone's heart through cooking.
You can bring someone happiness through thinking about joyful things
(06:14):
or praying while cooking the meal. You can transform not
just their body, but their mood, their energy levels, their heart,
their mental stay. And so it became, it became so
much more than just being in the kitchen for me.
It became an act of love and service and healing
for people that I love and wanted to care for.
(06:36):
And so yeah, it really shifted my perspective of what
cooking actually is. Like it's it's not just cooking, It's
so much deeper than that.
Speaker 7 (06:44):
You have just shifted my perspective. Since I love it.
I love the idea.
Speaker 3 (06:48):
I do that. I don't know if you realize this, Martin, Like,
but at when I'm cooking, I change. There's always music
plan in our house. Yeah, normally during the day. It
can be anything from singing bowls to you know, jazz
music to a lot of classical. And whenever I start cooking,
I like, I'll put on the James Ingram or Jeffrey
(07:10):
Osborne station, you like. So like the energy and the
house shifts and I always pray as I'm cooking. I
do that as as I never even told you in
your under this that as I'm cooking, I'm I'm praying
as I'm cooking, so that I love that.
Speaker 5 (07:26):
I want to monitor that a little closer.
Speaker 7 (07:29):
But what a beautiful practice, something so intentional that we
can do in our own lives. I love that to
channel our energy through our food to.
Speaker 1 (07:37):
Love one and the passion of our raveda just makes
it so much more special as well.
Speaker 4 (07:41):
I Rada basically just separates just how we have I guess,
like our genes or you know, personality types. In our veda,
it categorizes people into doshes and it's basically a mixture
of the elements that are within our body that create
our personality, our physical feats, our emotional balance during the day,
(08:03):
basically every part of our life is we kind of
navigate through these different elements, and so some people have
more of one element than another, and therefore you fit
into different categories according to that. And it's actually really
useful because when I understood that Jay was a pitter,
which means fire and water. You know, if you think
about what fire is, fire is hot in nature, it
(08:23):
eats everything up. It is like it's sharp and creates
a lot of energy in the room, and so that
also means so for example, for someone's digestion who is pitter,
it means you need to be eating regularly. You have
to you digest things very fast, which means that you
need deep, like fulfilling nourishment in you to be able
(08:44):
to work at the pace that your mind works at.
I also know when imbalanced, you know, if you think
about fire, it can lead to some sort of like
agitation or sharpness. And so you then learn the qualities
of the person that you spend the most amount of
time with and understand what's required to balance that person out.
So whether it's making sure his meals are there on
time for himself, or or understanding that his digestion the
(09:07):
types of foods that he needs to eat need to
balance and be calling to counteract the fiery nature. So
it sounds a bit more complicated than it is, but
it's actually quite simple once you start to read about
it and understand it and can really help to navigate
the foods you eat, the environment that you're in, the
workouts that you do, the things that you put on
your skin, literally every part of your life can be
(09:27):
adjusted according to your dosha.
Speaker 3 (09:31):
So then do you then roddy. Is that another way
that you all speak each other's love languages? Like do
he use Aravadic principles in some ways?
Speaker 4 (09:39):
Like you know that?
Speaker 3 (09:40):
Okay, so he's a eating Is that a way?
Speaker 4 (09:43):
Yeah, Like I know that I know the foods that
he should and shouldn't be eating. So if I notice
that he's in like a really intense period of his
work or he's really he's like not burning out, but
he's doing a lot of things, I know the types
of foods that he probably should be eating to help
balance that out. And in the same way, I think
I also can I also know that if he doesn't eat,
(10:06):
and he might be a little bit, you know, angry.
I know, I understand where that comes from.
Speaker 6 (10:10):
I was about to say that I don't know, but
I know when you're hungry.
Speaker 4 (10:13):
Yeah, exactly. And you also, like Kafas can tend to
be really emotional, and I tend to be quite emotional
and vatters have like a vata is air, which means
my mind can switch from one thing to another. And
it was really interesting when we first met and actually
through our relationship, one thing that we've struggled with is
he'll be telling a story or telling me something really meaningful,
and my mind can switch from one thing to another
(10:35):
quite fast. And so he's saying something, it's triggered something
else in my mind, and I'm off topic onto something else,
and he's barely finished saying what he's thinking of or
finished talking about the topic he's on. And so I
had to really explain that to him that it's not
that I'm not listening, it's that my mind is connecting
more dots than most people's does, and so my mind
(10:56):
will connect things in a way that the other people's won't.
And so I am I've had to learn to to
figure that out. But he's also learned to be a
bit give me a bit of grace with it too.
So it has stopped a few arguments using an ex
I know.
Speaker 6 (11:13):
As well.
Speaker 3 (11:14):
So, Jay, what would you say, because Radi has obviously
inspired so many people with her books and her you know,
cooking and help, what would be one habit that she
inspired one bad? If you would say habit that she
inspired you to change?
Speaker 2 (11:34):
Oh yeah, it would. It would definitely be my sugar
into it. And I think this is a really important
one for everyone because I think people just don't understand
the dangers of sugar and how much of it we're consuming,
and especially in America where I feel like so much
of our food is just naturally filled with it, and
how much of our diets have become infiltrated with packaged
foods most of the things we're eating and not natural
(11:57):
whole foods. And so I would say my diet as
a whole has been completely reorganized and reshifted through radhi
End And it's actually a re it's a reinvent. It's
a redefining of taste buds. Like it's not even like now,
it's not like, oh my gosh, I'm craving this and
I can't have it. It's almost like recognizing that our
(12:19):
taste buds are so badly programmed because of what we've
been conditioned to eat for so long, and so we
think we need it more than we do. So I
think I definitely still have a sweet tooth and I
love a chocolate Freight's cake if.
Speaker 6 (12:31):
I can get with it, But.
Speaker 2 (12:34):
Definitely made me much healthier my diet, And yeah, that
would easily be the biggest one.
Speaker 6 (12:39):
That would easily be the biggest one.
Speaker 5 (12:41):
Ray if someone wanted to change their overall wellness and energy.
What one or two things could they do?
Speaker 4 (12:50):
Honestly, I'd say in this day and age, one of
the biggest things to change is I always think of
the eighty twenty rule, but in this case, I mean
like eighty percent of the food not coming from a
packet and twenty percent of the food coming from a packet,
Like if you can make sure that the balance is
that way, because for a lot of people the balance
is actually the other way. It's eighty percent coming from
a packet and twenty percent coming from whole foods, and
(13:12):
so I think that is causing a lot of the
rise and a lot of health issues. So that's one,
and I think the second thing would be I've noticed
that the fall in the amount of people that want
to cook at home, and most of us are eating
foods from restaurants or takeaways, and actually we don't know
the oils that people are using, we don't know the ingredients.
(13:35):
We are really unaware of the consciousness that people are
cooking it with. And so the second part to that
would be try and cook more meals at home, like
connect to your food, understand what's going into it, like
read the labels, start to educate yourself. You know, I
think we've put so much of our health into other
people's hands, and I think that it's really difficult nowadays
because there is way too much information online. Everybody's telling
(13:58):
you you should or shouldn't eat this. But in our Veda,
I just learned how important it is to start to
listen to your body. Most of us are so disconnected
to our body that we don't even notice when we're
having digestive issues. We don't realize that when I'm eating this,
it's actually causing joint pain. When I'm eating this, it's
making me feel lethargic and not energized. Like the bottom
line is anything that we eat or drink, it should
(14:20):
be creating vitality, energy and likeness in the body. Like
you should feel like you can still get up and
do things as soon as you're eating foods and it's
making you lethargic, it's making you feel heavy, and it's
draining energy from you. That's a sign and the food
that you're eating may just not be right for you.
And so the third part of that would be education.
(14:41):
Don't leave it to other people to tell you what
you should be doing for your body. Start to learn,
and the best way of doing that to start off
with is start listening. When I'm eating this, How am
I feeling when I'm eating this? How is my digestion?
How is my mind? Am I feeling focused and clear?
Or am I feeling foggy? You know, there are such
simple questions we can ask ourselves to really start to
tune into the ins and outs of what we're eating
(15:03):
and how it's affecting us. So I would say less
packaged foods, cooking more meals at home, and educating yourself
because your health is in your hands. It shouldn't be
in someone else's hands.
Speaker 7 (15:17):
More of this inspiring and powerful conversation after the break,
(15:43):
Welcome back to My Legacy with Jay Shetty and his
wife Roddy.
Speaker 1 (15:48):
Jay. We're so excited that you're about to take your
podcast on Purpose on the road where people can see
you live with of course some surprise guests as well.
And what comes to mind is, over the years you've
interviewed some of the most remarkable people in the world
and gained their insight and wisdom on issues about happiness
and living a fulfilled life. I like to ask you
(16:10):
if there's one or two things from one of your
guests or multiple guests that have really impacted your thinking
in those areas.
Speaker 6 (16:19):
Yeah. Absolutely, Yeah.
Speaker 2 (16:20):
I feel so grateful that I get to, after six
years of building this incredible community, I get to go
on tour and meet those people and hold those hands
and give them hugs and look into their eyes and
thank them for listening to us. You know, the hundreds
of millions of people who have been doing that every
single week for six years now.
Speaker 6 (16:37):
It's really really exciting. So we're starting with North America.
Speaker 2 (16:40):
When I think about my guests, I definitely think about
a lot of the incredible experts we've had on sleep.
And the reason I bring up sleep is because I
think it's the one habit that incredibly impacts every other habit.
When you get a good night's sleep, you're less likely
(17:03):
to eat foods that are bad for you, You're more
likely to have the energy to work out, You're going
to feel more motivated and focused at work. It's the
domino effect. And what I've learned about sleep is that
a lot of us are not trying to build up
our sleep like we build up other parts of our life.
We want to gain mastery at our careers. We want
(17:23):
to get good at our relationships, but so much of
that is based on the quality of our sleep. If
you have slept well, you're less irritable, you're less agitated,
you're less likely to get angry or frustrated when something
doesn't go your way because you have that foundational calm.
And so for me, the things I've learned about sleep,
(17:44):
the first is set a bedtime routine. Try and sleep
at the same time every single day, again at least
five days a week. Second is, try and sleep in
what's known as cave like darkness. A lot of us
today have flashing lights from TVs, from remote controls, from
our our phones, whatever it may be. Try and sleep
in cave like darkness as best as you can. Try
(18:05):
and sleep in a temperature that's sixty three to sixty
eight sixty nine fahrenheit, that's the recommended temperature, slightly cooler.
We actually sleep better when it's a little bit cooler
than what we think. And the last one is have
a bedtime routine. You know, eat a few hours before
you get into before you're going to go to bed,
(18:26):
stop looking at phone an hour before bed. Really create
that energy to be able to switch off and so
sleep has been something I've focused on with a lot
of my amazing guests, and the fulfillment and sleep can
give so much fulfillment and peace in life. I think
it would change so much of our day. And the
other one I'd say that has really moved me is
a lot of the advice that I've received on people
(18:49):
talking about childhood trauma and the need to revisit our
inner child. I think what we don't realize is so
much of what we see today is not someone's adult self,
but their child's self stuck in their adult body. And
so when you're looking at someone, if you were to
look at them as a child, you could actually understand
(19:11):
why they say the things they do, and why they
demand the things they want, and why they behave the
way they do, and why they act the way they
do because it's their child's self. And I think if
all of us were able to look at not just
other people that way, but look at ourselves that way,
and look at our child self and say, where have
I not fulfilled my childhood dreams? Where have I not
(19:34):
met my child in a child?
Speaker 6 (19:36):
Where have I not.
Speaker 2 (19:37):
Really reconciled with that in a child? I think life
would change incredibly. I think the way we talk to ourselves.
I think if we talk to ourselves as if we
were talking to a younger child, we would transform the
hate and the harshness and the pain that we inflict
on ourselves, just through the self criticism and the self
(19:59):
judgment and the self harsh talk that we have in
our mind constantly, from the moment we wake up and
we look in the mirror and comment on our weight,
to the moment we go to work and comment on
our intellect, and the moment we get home and comment
on our effort and enthusiasm. We're constantly criticizing ourselves, and
so I think the need to see each other as children,
(20:21):
see ourselves as children, makes such a big difference and
would hugely transform the planet we live on. And there's
a beautiful quote by Russell Barklay that I love where
he said that the people who need the most love
often ask for it in the most unloving ways. And
I think that's what we are, the child self in us.
(20:41):
We're not asking for love in adult ways. We're asking
for love in childlike ways. And if we can heal
that and recognize that in ourselves and the people around us,
then we have the opportunity to truly have maturity, which
is what I think we're also deeply looking for and seeking.
So those are the couple of things that come to
mind from the podcast.
Speaker 3 (21:02):
We have a book WOW called what Is What Is
My Legacy?
Speaker 1 (21:09):
Contributed to our book and we're so grateful.
Speaker 3 (21:11):
For all authors of that book. And one of the
things that we talk about one is the importance of
your inner child. And one of the things that that
I talk about in the in my portion of the
book is that I have, in fact, I have a
lot of them around a childhood picture of myself in
a frame next to my bed. So that's one of
the first things that I see see in the morning
(21:33):
and last things at night. And we also talk to
people and even encourage them to even put as your screensaver,
a little version of your of yourself as your screen saver,
to you know, constantly reinforced and seeing that that little
person of you and and connecting with that, that that
inner child.
Speaker 1 (21:53):
Jane ready, just thank you guys so much for contributing
to What Is My Legacy. We're very grateful. And one
of the things that really stood out based on this
conversation is not just how trauma is within us, especially
childhood trauma, but also through oup A genetics, trauma can
be passed down from generation to generation to generation. You know,
do you have any insights on that topic.
Speaker 2 (22:12):
I personally think that it's something we have to reflect on,
and a simple way I like to reflect on it
is something I call the gifts and the gaps. And
so I believe there are certain gifts we got from
our parents, and we now expect others to give us
those same gifts. And there are certain gaps that our
parents left and we now want others to fill those gaps.
(22:36):
And I think the key in both of those scenarios
is learning to give yourself those gifts and fill those
gaps yourself. And so I think that's a very simple
entry level way into this topic or conversation that can
be really big, really scary, really challenging, which ideally you
(22:56):
do with the therapist and someone who's trained to guide
you through that journey. But for those who are moving
into that space themselves, think about what habits you repeat
because they're triggered from your parents.
Speaker 6 (23:08):
What habits you.
Speaker 2 (23:11):
Have today that maybe aren't yours but have come from
something in your past, and very quickly you'll be able
to make literal adjustments that can save your future from
your past. And that's what i'd say to people. It's
anyone who wants to save their future from their past.
We have to go backwards and heal our trauma in
(23:31):
order to move forward in a healed state. And so
that requires the ability to look back and go, where
did I pick that up? Why do I react like that?
Where does that trigger come from? And as soon as
you map it out, it's almost like this light bulb
moment where you go, oh my gosh, I had no idea,
and now you can actually edit your path forward.
Speaker 6 (23:52):
So that's the entry point i'd say for most people.
Speaker 7 (23:56):
For those listening on social media, I want to share
something with loved ones, save our future from our past.
That's something to share to their friends. I love that phrase.
Speaker 1 (24:04):
Ready, you've also had some amazing people in your podcast,
and thank you so much for what you do and
sharing such wisdom. Is there a guest or two or
a word of wisdom you can share from what's been
shared with you? For our listeners, I.
Speaker 4 (24:17):
Would say the people that have recently stood out to me.
One was gosh, Terry Cole. Actually, she talked a lot
about the way that we connect in relationships, and you know,
it was a very enlightening moment when she was talking
about how we can help the people that we love.
(24:39):
And you know, I think we have this habit of
wanting to save people in our life when they're struggling,
save people in our life when they have are going
through low moments. And that's one thing. You know, Actually,
it reminds me of when I was struggling with things
and Jay could have saved me, and instead he chose
to give me aid that in that area, he didn't
(25:02):
choose to fix it for me, he would help me
fix it for myself. And she spoke about that so deeply, saying,
most of the time we're trying to play savior to
make ourselves feel less uncomfortable, but actually you are disempowering
them by fixing it for them. You are not giving
them the tools and techniques to be able to do
that for themselves ever again. Instead you're being the savior,
(25:24):
taking the power away from them. And I found that
so fascinating. Yeah, I thought I thought that was a
really that was a topic that I had to digest
a lot because I always struggle when people around me,
or family or anyone is struggling. I struggle not to
intervene and try and fix the situation because I feel
(25:45):
uncomfortable that they're going through it.
Speaker 2 (25:47):
But I realized it's.
Speaker 4 (25:48):
So much more about giving people the tools and techniques
rather than stepping in to play savior.
Speaker 3 (25:54):
That's a big one, not only in romantic relationships, that's
a big one in parenting. To when to know when
that they need that struggle in order to garner that
that muscle, and when to you know, kind of stepping
back and not be in the instant savior even for
our children.
Speaker 4 (26:14):
Yes, exactly. So another one that was amazing actually was
Mindy Peal. She shares a lot about female hormones and
the way a woman should be living according to her
cycle rather than living according to a twenty four.
Speaker 3 (26:28):
Hours yes, because we should come there, Yes.
Speaker 4 (26:32):
And I thought that's something I think a lot of
women could really use, because hormonal issues are really going
up in women especially, and I think learning about our
hormone cycle can really help us to avoid the future
problems that women go through, whether it's difficulty through menopause,
whether it's difficulty conceiving all of that is based on
(26:55):
our hormones. And so yeah, that was another one that
I that I really learnt so much from For the.
Speaker 3 (26:59):
Man at the table, Yes, we are taught just to
like we are taught on twenty to do things on
a twenty four hour cycle, yes, which is a male cycle,
but we as women, we have a twenty eight day cycle.
And so it's really now this big movement of women
reconnecting to doing things, being in the flow, acknowledging that
(27:20):
our cycle is our cycle is longer than the way
that we're taught, which is just twenty four hours. The
men are not.
Speaker 7 (27:30):
Ahead back in a moment with Jay Shetty and his
wife Roddy after word from our.
Speaker 8 (27:35):
Partners, now back to my legacy of Jay Shetty and
(28:00):
his wife Ronning.
Speaker 3 (28:02):
We we obviously have laughed a lot today together and
and that's that's that's wonderful, and it's so important we
have to be very transparent that right now. It's it's
very difficult for so many people, and so many people
feel such an overwhelming fear, you know, disconnection, and so
(28:27):
I would really am curious to hear from both of
you what would you offer to to people that are
that are feeling that that fear, that that disconnection, the overwhelm,
the the stress good question.
Speaker 4 (28:51):
Uh, you know, the first thing that came to mind
for me is whenever I feel like things are out
of my control, or I feel like overwhelmed at what's
happening around me, or even in our own life, there's
this every time I feel like it's just me, the
problem feels really difficult to handle. But as soon as
(29:11):
I think the problem is me plus God, or me
plus the universe or something that has a much higher
power than I do, it starts to feel a little
bit more manageable. And so I find that prayer for
me has always been such a beautiful place to come
to when all other hope feels lost. I think I
get a lot of solace in prayer. And I think
(29:34):
that also connects to the idea that if we can
feel way more disconnected when we don't feel connected to ourself,
and so whether it's practices and rituals to actually connect
deeper to ourself that allows us to connect deeper to
other people and have meaningful connections with others that help
us through those times. I think reconnecting every single day
(29:58):
in some way to who you are and have those
moments are really important to be able to connect to
someone else, to be able to feel understood or valued
by other people. And yeah, I think and for me,
the main one always ends up being prayer because I'm like,
at this point, I can't control anything, so I'm leaving
up to you, but yeah, I would love to hear
(30:19):
some of yours.
Speaker 2 (30:21):
There's something called the third space theory, and it's this
idea that just around twenty five fifty years ago, we
had three spaces we lived in, We had home, we
had work, and then we had church or temple, synagogue, mosque.
And what happened is that those three spaces shrunk to
(30:43):
two spaces. We went from work to home and home
to work. And now we all know that those two
places have shrunk into one place. We work from home
and we live at home. And what's happened is not
that we've just lost three spaces, but we've lost what
that that third space provided us. So what happened at
(31:03):
church or the community center or a place of gathering
was you had a space to look back on work
and home and state and everything else and reflect on
how could I be better? What could I do differently?
Let's figure out together what the solution is, what can
we all band to do together. So the biggest challenge
(31:24):
today is that we're all feeling the same feeling, but
we're feeling it on our own. We're lonely feeling the
same thing. And there's a big difference between being lonely
feeling something and feeling belonging in feeling something. And so
what I would encourage everyone to do is go and
(31:44):
find your third space. Go and find your space of belonging.
Go and find your space of connection. Go and find
that space where you're with people of equal value, where
you can share your heart, when you can hear other peoples,
when you can open up your mind, and where you
can carry someone else's burden. I think we've just lost
that as a society, and I think these moments are
(32:06):
great reminders that we are stronger when we are working together,
we are better when we're working together, and ultimately, when
we're united and carrying each other's weight, the weight doesn't
feel as large. And I think that's the biggest challenge today,
is that we're all carrying the weight on our own
and so finding that third space, creating that third space
(32:26):
if you don't have it. The third space doesn't have
to be two hundred people, two thousand people, twenty thousand people.
It can literally be four people in a room that
are reading scripture together, that are starting a book club,
that are listening to this podcast and sharing what they
learned from you and all your amazing guests that you've
had on It starts that small, and I really feel
(32:48):
that we have to create that third space, even because
right now our third space is all of us sitting
in front of the television, and the TV screen is
the third space. The phone screen is the third spa,
and that third space isn't giving you what the original
third space gave you.
Speaker 7 (33:06):
Oh I love it. You know, both of you give
this incredible, powerful message into the world and to this universe.
You've dedicated your lives to service and to inspiration. Of course,
on my legacy, we reflect on legacy and ultimately, what
do you hope each of you your legacy will be.
Speaker 2 (33:27):
It's really interesting when I think about legacy, I think
about things that are timeless and things that will last forever.
And if I'm completely honest, I don't think anything I've done,
or said or created will last forever. I'm really grateful
I've got to be a tiny voice in the five
thousand year old history of the Vedic tradition, which has
(33:51):
come before me and will outlast me for thousands and
thousands and thousands of years. And so the legac is
the ancient wisdom that is actually timeless wisdom. It's not
ancient because it's as relevant today as it was five
thousand years ago. And the fact that those spiritual texts
I've been able to share those in my books and
(34:15):
quote them in my writing and my videos and my work.
I feel grateful I got connected. So the legacy is
really for those texts to live on, which would live
on with or without me. And so I'm not too
concerned about my personal legacy because the text will do
the work that they need to do, and those words
will have the impact that they're meant to have, with
(34:37):
or without me. I just got lucky to be a
small part of that journey.
Speaker 4 (34:41):
Yeah, I think mine might be along the same lines
of it. You know, I remember when I started sharing
anything that I was learning online, I would really struggle
because I didn't feel qualified to do it, and I
remember one of our teachers, rather than Notswami, would always
talk about being a bridge where you don't have to
be the expert, you don't have to be the endpoint,
but you can be a bridge for someone where you're
(35:02):
helping them go from one one, from one thing to
another and then passing them on to somebody else. And
I really love that, and it really helped me to
feel qualified to some degree to be able to do
that for people. And so I actually think, when I
reflect on my life, what legacy I carry off my
grandma or my mom, or my dad or anybody that's
(35:23):
been before me. It is the knowledge that they've imparted
in me, whether it's through the food that I make,
whether it's through the way that I interact with people
after having watched the way that my dad interacts with them,
whether it's the spice knowledge that my grandma has taught
me about how to heal my body through it. It's
like that information is the legacy, because every single thing
(35:45):
material can become invaluable so easily, and so I think
for me, yeah, it's being able to share all those
little moments of teachings that you've had in your life
and passing that down or two other people and have
said there is able to nourish their lives with it,
and then also pass that to other people. That makes sense.
Speaker 3 (36:05):
How beautiful that we started with your grandmother and that
we're in and we ended and we ended with your
your grandmother.
Speaker 7 (36:13):
Yeah, jin Retti, thank you for sharing your wisdom, your
love with each other in that beautiful, authentic way. The
extraordinary challenges that you've laid in front of us of
how we can all our listeners and our viewers do
small but deeply intentional things every day in our lives.
And I want to relay some of those challenges again
(36:33):
for the message that your partner is your guru. What
a beautiful thing for our listeners to say to their
loved ones, their partners after they listen to this, that
you are my guru, you are the teacher you help
me be better to say that intentionally to someone. And
then I also love the small but powerful idea of
while we're cooking, to infuse the love to say a
(36:56):
little prayer. You know, Andrea your music, you know a
little bit of love. Jane Ritty, thank you for living
your legacies every single day and reminding us that purpose
isn't something we find, It's something we create in our lives.
Speaker 2 (37:11):
Thank you such so greate all of you for creating
what felt like such a beautiful safe space. Even though
we're connected virtually, it speaks all jez It just felt
like we were all in the same roman.
Speaker 6 (37:22):
So thank you so.
Speaker 3 (37:22):
Much, Thank you for joining us. We are so grateful
to have you as part of this journey. If you
enjoy today's conversation, subscribe and share the podcast with friends, family,
and loved ones, and follow us on social media at
my Legacy Movement. At the heart of this podcast is
doctor King's vision of the beloved community and the power
(37:46):
of connection. This podcast is a testament to that vision
and the product of collective effort, enriched by the voices, stories,
and support of so many. A Legacy Plus Studio production
just distributed by iHeartMedia Creative and executive producer Suzanne Hayward
co executive producer Lisa Lyle. My Legacy podcast is available
(38:10):
on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you.
Speaker 5 (38:13):
Get your podcasts.
Speaker 3 (38:14):
Until next time, may you find connection and inspiration to
live your most fulfilled life.
You've interviewed some of the most remarkable people in the world.
I like to ask you if there's one or two
things that have really impacted your thinking.
Speaker 2 (00:12):
I definitely think about a lot of the incredible experts
we've had on sleep. And the reason I bring up
sleep is because I think it's the one habit that
incredibly impacts every other habit. When you get a good
night's sleep, you're less likely to eat foods that are
(00:34):
bad for you, You're more likely to have the energy
to work out, You're going to feel more motivated and
focused at work. It's the domino effect. And so for me,
the things I've learned about sleep, the first.
Speaker 3 (00:47):
Is Hello Loves. I'm Andrea Waters King, and that was
Jay Shetdy sharing a truth that we all need to hear.
Welcome back to my legacy. Last week we explored love.
Today we explore something just as powerful, wisdom. Ja Shetty
and Roddy Deblukia open up about the teachings that shape them,
(01:09):
the struggles that tested them, and the daily habits that
guy I'm joined by my husband, Martin Luther King, the
third eldest son of doctor Martin Luther King Junior, and
Coretta Scott King, along with our good friends New York
Times best selling authors Mark and Craig Kilberger. Let's pick
up right where we left off. You're a great lesson
(01:31):
in the languages of love, yes, and acknowledging that you
know that we all love different ways and we receive
love differently. You all kind of ask of what language
does Roddy speak and show love? Or what language does
Jay speak? And then how can I show them love
in my language? And I just think that's such a beautiful,
(01:53):
beautiful thing. And laughter. I love that you know you
all are you know the laughter that you continue to bring,
and I know that in our relationship that laughter is foundational.
Speaker 4 (02:10):
If you didn't you cry, yeah, exactly.
Speaker 5 (02:13):
Especially you know, when I first met Andrea, she was
she was a serious as border health, serious health. That's
pretty serious. Serious Andrea when she was twenty ish, like.
Speaker 6 (02:29):
I said, she she was like really serious.
Speaker 5 (02:32):
I don't know if I saw that, but all of
a sudden, over the last like five years, she is
becoming one of the most funny, prey people that I know,
one of the most funniest persons, And it just adds
so much to to our lives and people don't know
my dad was humorous, got that from his mother. They
see him as as very serious, which he always was publicly,
(02:55):
but he also was extraordinarily humorous.
Speaker 3 (02:57):
Rod he's the comedian in our relation that was going
to be so, what are some things that she does
to make you wear?
Speaker 4 (03:04):
Oh?
Speaker 6 (03:04):
My god.
Speaker 2 (03:05):
Rather, he's the kind of person that wakes up in
the morning, does a random dance move, like just for fun,
I walk into the kitchen, there's no music playing, there's
no music playing, but rather he's having a full on
party just in her head.
Speaker 6 (03:18):
Yeah, And it's so much fun to watch.
Speaker 2 (03:19):
And just someone who's always looking at the bright side
of life, someone who's always so well.
Speaker 4 (03:28):
The time you're painting me out to be, I can
be a lot.
Speaker 7 (03:30):
It's okay, no you can't.
Speaker 2 (03:33):
She's but just yeah, she's hilarious in every possible way.
She's making funny jokes.
Speaker 6 (03:38):
Everyone knows.
Speaker 2 (03:38):
Anyone who follows Rather on social media knows that she's hilarious.
And and my team finds it really funny because on
Valentine's Day or on our anniversary or whatever, I'll write
these like long, soppy, romantic, heartfelt messages because that's who
I am and RADI will post an AI video of
me twerking.
Speaker 6 (03:59):
I'm not joking, it's.
Speaker 7 (04:01):
Will we share that on social media? Is that available?
Speaker 6 (04:05):
Malletine's day? Okay?
Speaker 2 (04:06):
I was like, literally, I wrote this beautiful post and
she's got a video of AI.
Speaker 4 (04:10):
You're a PDA person.
Speaker 6 (04:12):
Yeah, I struggle with that.
Speaker 7 (04:14):
I love the description in this image in the morning,
you walking in dancing into the morning kitchen. So I'm
the type of guy who rolls out of bed and
you got.
Speaker 6 (04:23):
To drag me into the kitchen.
Speaker 7 (04:24):
I never loved cooking, so I got to be candid
here writing your book Joyful, You focus on conscious cooking
and the energy that we bring into our food. Is
someone who sees cooking as a chore. How can we
turn that into much more of a joyful practice?
Speaker 4 (04:40):
I well to be fair the morning thing. I am
a morning person. I always have them. My mum has
trained me to always wake up early. Didn't like it
when I was younger, but I really appreciate it now
because mornings are definitely my favorite time of day, So
I think that's at my advantage. I definitely jump out
of bed and I'm ready to go from the second
them away. But how do I the Christians cooking.
Speaker 7 (05:03):
It's a joyful practice. It's so cool.
Speaker 4 (05:07):
Because I think after learning about Avader and also again
watching my mom and my grandma cook throughout my whole life,
I realize that it is so much more than just
feel for the body like what It is such an
act of service, and through that act you can share
so much love in it, Like whenever you think about
(05:28):
I deeply believe that the reason most of us feel
if our parents used to cook for us, that something
tasted so good and you felt, you feel that warmth
and that love through the food that someone's cooked for you.
There is an actual energetic force that goes into the
food that you're cooking when you're cooking it. And even
in Irada, it talks about how the energy that you
have when you're touching the food, when you're cooking the food,
(05:50):
when you're preparing the food, how you are feeling, the
thoughts you're thinking, the energy that you have, the emotion
that you're feeling, has the ability to be transferred into
the food that you are creating for that person. And
so when I learned that, I was like, that is
phenomenal because you can literally heal someone's heart through cooking.
You can bring someone happiness through thinking about joyful things
(06:14):
or praying while cooking the meal. You can transform not
just their body, but their mood, their energy levels, their heart,
their mental stay. And so it became, it became so
much more than just being in the kitchen for me.
It became an act of love and service and healing
for people that I love and wanted to care for.
(06:36):
And so yeah, it really shifted my perspective of what
cooking actually is. Like it's it's not just cooking, It's
so much deeper than that.
Speaker 7 (06:44):
You have just shifted my perspective. Since I love it.
I love the idea.
Speaker 3 (06:48):
I do that. I don't know if you realize this, Martin, Like,
but at when I'm cooking, I change. There's always music
plan in our house. Yeah, normally during the day. It
can be anything from singing bowls to you know, jazz
music to a lot of classical. And whenever I start cooking,
I like, I'll put on the James Ingram or Jeffrey
(07:10):
Osborne station, you like. So like the energy and the
house shifts and I always pray as I'm cooking. I
do that as as I never even told you in
your under this that as I'm cooking, I'm I'm praying
as I'm cooking, so that I love that.
Speaker 5 (07:26):
I want to monitor that a little closer.
Speaker 7 (07:29):
But what a beautiful practice, something so intentional that we
can do in our own lives. I love that to
channel our energy through our food to.
Speaker 1 (07:37):
Love one and the passion of our raveda just makes
it so much more special as well.
Speaker 4 (07:41):
I Rada basically just separates just how we have I guess,
like our genes or you know, personality types. In our veda,
it categorizes people into doshes and it's basically a mixture
of the elements that are within our body that create
our personality, our physical feats, our emotional balance during the day,
(08:03):
basically every part of our life is we kind of
navigate through these different elements, and so some people have
more of one element than another, and therefore you fit
into different categories according to that. And it's actually really
useful because when I understood that Jay was a pitter,
which means fire and water. You know, if you think
about what fire is, fire is hot in nature, it
(08:23):
eats everything up. It is like it's sharp and creates
a lot of energy in the room, and so that
also means so for example, for someone's digestion who is pitter,
it means you need to be eating regularly. You have
to you digest things very fast, which means that you
need deep, like fulfilling nourishment in you to be able
(08:44):
to work at the pace that your mind works at.
I also know when imbalanced, you know, if you think
about fire, it can lead to some sort of like
agitation or sharpness. And so you then learn the qualities
of the person that you spend the most amount of
time with and understand what's required to balance that person out.
So whether it's making sure his meals are there on
time for himself, or or understanding that his digestion the
(09:07):
types of foods that he needs to eat need to
balance and be calling to counteract the fiery nature. So
it sounds a bit more complicated than it is, but
it's actually quite simple once you start to read about
it and understand it and can really help to navigate
the foods you eat, the environment that you're in, the
workouts that you do, the things that you put on
your skin, literally every part of your life can be
(09:27):
adjusted according to your dosha.
Speaker 3 (09:31):
So then do you then roddy. Is that another way
that you all speak each other's love languages? Like do
he use Aravadic principles in some ways?
Speaker 4 (09:39):
Like you know that?
Speaker 3 (09:40):
Okay, so he's a eating Is that a way?
Speaker 4 (09:43):
Yeah, Like I know that I know the foods that
he should and shouldn't be eating. So if I notice
that he's in like a really intense period of his
work or he's really he's like not burning out, but
he's doing a lot of things, I know the types
of foods that he probably should be eating to help
balance that out. And in the same way, I think
I also can I also know that if he doesn't eat,
(10:06):
and he might be a little bit, you know, angry.
I know, I understand where that comes from.
Speaker 6 (10:10):
I was about to say that I don't know, but
I know when you're hungry.
Speaker 4 (10:13):
Yeah, exactly. And you also, like Kafas can tend to
be really emotional, and I tend to be quite emotional
and vatters have like a vata is air, which means
my mind can switch from one thing to another. And
it was really interesting when we first met and actually
through our relationship, one thing that we've struggled with is
he'll be telling a story or telling me something really meaningful,
and my mind can switch from one thing to another
(10:35):
quite fast. And so he's saying something, it's triggered something
else in my mind, and I'm off topic onto something else,
and he's barely finished saying what he's thinking of or
finished talking about the topic he's on. And so I
had to really explain that to him that it's not
that I'm not listening, it's that my mind is connecting
more dots than most people's does, and so my mind
(10:56):
will connect things in a way that the other people's won't.
And so I am I've had to learn to to
figure that out. But he's also learned to be a
bit give me a bit of grace with it too.
So it has stopped a few arguments using an ex
I know.
Speaker 6 (11:13):
As well.
Speaker 3 (11:14):
So, Jay, what would you say, because Radi has obviously
inspired so many people with her books and her you know,
cooking and help, what would be one habit that she
inspired one bad? If you would say habit that she
inspired you to change?
Speaker 2 (11:34):
Oh yeah, it would. It would definitely be my sugar
into it. And I think this is a really important
one for everyone because I think people just don't understand
the dangers of sugar and how much of it we're consuming,
and especially in America where I feel like so much
of our food is just naturally filled with it, and
how much of our diets have become infiltrated with packaged
foods most of the things we're eating and not natural
(11:57):
whole foods. And so I would say my diet as
a whole has been completely reorganized and reshifted through radhi
End And it's actually a re it's a reinvent. It's
a redefining of taste buds. Like it's not even like now,
it's not like, oh my gosh, I'm craving this and
I can't have it. It's almost like recognizing that our
(12:19):
taste buds are so badly programmed because of what we've
been conditioned to eat for so long, and so we
think we need it more than we do. So I
think I definitely still have a sweet tooth and I
love a chocolate Freight's cake if.
Speaker 6 (12:31):
I can get with it, But.
Speaker 2 (12:34):
Definitely made me much healthier my diet, And yeah, that
would easily be the biggest one.
Speaker 6 (12:39):
That would easily be the biggest one.
Speaker 5 (12:41):
Ray if someone wanted to change their overall wellness and energy.
What one or two things could they do?
Speaker 4 (12:50):
Honestly, I'd say in this day and age, one of
the biggest things to change is I always think of
the eighty twenty rule, but in this case, I mean
like eighty percent of the food not coming from a
packet and twenty percent of the food coming from a packet,
Like if you can make sure that the balance is
that way, because for a lot of people the balance
is actually the other way. It's eighty percent coming from
a packet and twenty percent coming from whole foods, and
(13:12):
so I think that is causing a lot of the
rise and a lot of health issues. So that's one,
and I think the second thing would be I've noticed
that the fall in the amount of people that want
to cook at home, and most of us are eating
foods from restaurants or takeaways, and actually we don't know
the oils that people are using, we don't know the ingredients.
(13:35):
We are really unaware of the consciousness that people are
cooking it with. And so the second part to that
would be try and cook more meals at home, like
connect to your food, understand what's going into it, like
read the labels, start to educate yourself. You know, I
think we've put so much of our health into other
people's hands, and I think that it's really difficult nowadays
because there is way too much information online. Everybody's telling
(13:58):
you you should or shouldn't eat this. But in our Veda,
I just learned how important it is to start to
listen to your body. Most of us are so disconnected
to our body that we don't even notice when we're
having digestive issues. We don't realize that when I'm eating this,
it's actually causing joint pain. When I'm eating this, it's
making me feel lethargic and not energized. Like the bottom
line is anything that we eat or drink, it should
(14:20):
be creating vitality, energy and likeness in the body. Like
you should feel like you can still get up and
do things as soon as you're eating foods and it's
making you lethargic, it's making you feel heavy, and it's
draining energy from you. That's a sign and the food
that you're eating may just not be right for you.
And so the third part of that would be education.
(14:41):
Don't leave it to other people to tell you what
you should be doing for your body. Start to learn,
and the best way of doing that to start off
with is start listening. When I'm eating this, How am
I feeling when I'm eating this? How is my digestion?
How is my mind? Am I feeling focused and clear?
Or am I feeling foggy? You know, there are such
simple questions we can ask ourselves to really start to
tune into the ins and outs of what we're eating
(15:03):
and how it's affecting us. So I would say less
packaged foods, cooking more meals at home, and educating yourself
because your health is in your hands. It shouldn't be
in someone else's hands.
Speaker 7 (15:17):
More of this inspiring and powerful conversation after the break,
(15:43):
Welcome back to My Legacy with Jay Shetty and his
wife Roddy.
Speaker 1 (15:48):
Jay. We're so excited that you're about to take your
podcast on Purpose on the road where people can see
you live with of course some surprise guests as well.
And what comes to mind is, over the years you've
interviewed some of the most remarkable people in the world
and gained their insight and wisdom on issues about happiness
and living a fulfilled life. I like to ask you
(16:10):
if there's one or two things from one of your
guests or multiple guests that have really impacted your thinking
in those areas.
Speaker 6 (16:19):
Yeah. Absolutely, Yeah.
Speaker 2 (16:20):
I feel so grateful that I get to, after six
years of building this incredible community, I get to go
on tour and meet those people and hold those hands
and give them hugs and look into their eyes and
thank them for listening to us. You know, the hundreds
of millions of people who have been doing that every
single week for six years now.
Speaker 6 (16:37):
It's really really exciting. So we're starting with North America.
Speaker 2 (16:40):
When I think about my guests, I definitely think about
a lot of the incredible experts we've had on sleep.
And the reason I bring up sleep is because I
think it's the one habit that incredibly impacts every other habit.
When you get a good night's sleep, you're less likely
(17:03):
to eat foods that are bad for you, You're more
likely to have the energy to work out, You're going
to feel more motivated and focused at work. It's the
domino effect. And what I've learned about sleep is that
a lot of us are not trying to build up
our sleep like we build up other parts of our life.
We want to gain mastery at our careers. We want
(17:23):
to get good at our relationships, but so much of
that is based on the quality of our sleep. If
you have slept well, you're less irritable, you're less agitated,
you're less likely to get angry or frustrated when something
doesn't go your way because you have that foundational calm.
And so for me, the things I've learned about sleep,
(17:44):
the first is set a bedtime routine. Try and sleep
at the same time every single day, again at least
five days a week. Second is, try and sleep in
what's known as cave like darkness. A lot of us
today have flashing lights from TVs, from remote controls, from
our our phones, whatever it may be. Try and sleep
in cave like darkness as best as you can. Try
(18:05):
and sleep in a temperature that's sixty three to sixty
eight sixty nine fahrenheit, that's the recommended temperature, slightly cooler.
We actually sleep better when it's a little bit cooler
than what we think. And the last one is have
a bedtime routine. You know, eat a few hours before
you get into before you're going to go to bed,
(18:26):
stop looking at phone an hour before bed. Really create
that energy to be able to switch off and so
sleep has been something I've focused on with a lot
of my amazing guests, and the fulfillment and sleep can
give so much fulfillment and peace in life. I think
it would change so much of our day. And the
other one I'd say that has really moved me is
a lot of the advice that I've received on people
(18:49):
talking about childhood trauma and the need to revisit our
inner child. I think what we don't realize is so
much of what we see today is not someone's adult self,
but their child's self stuck in their adult body. And
so when you're looking at someone, if you were to
look at them as a child, you could actually understand
(19:11):
why they say the things they do, and why they
demand the things they want, and why they behave the
way they do, and why they act the way they
do because it's their child's self. And I think if
all of us were able to look at not just
other people that way, but look at ourselves that way,
and look at our child self and say, where have
I not fulfilled my childhood dreams? Where have I not
(19:34):
met my child in a child?
Speaker 6 (19:36):
Where have I not.
Speaker 2 (19:37):
Really reconciled with that in a child? I think life
would change incredibly. I think the way we talk to ourselves.
I think if we talk to ourselves as if we
were talking to a younger child, we would transform the
hate and the harshness and the pain that we inflict
on ourselves, just through the self criticism and the self
(19:59):
judgment and the self harsh talk that we have in
our mind constantly, from the moment we wake up and
we look in the mirror and comment on our weight,
to the moment we go to work and comment on
our intellect, and the moment we get home and comment
on our effort and enthusiasm. We're constantly criticizing ourselves, and
so I think the need to see each other as children,
(20:21):
see ourselves as children, makes such a big difference and
would hugely transform the planet we live on. And there's
a beautiful quote by Russell Barklay that I love where
he said that the people who need the most love
often ask for it in the most unloving ways. And
I think that's what we are, the child self in us.
(20:41):
We're not asking for love in adult ways. We're asking
for love in childlike ways. And if we can heal
that and recognize that in ourselves and the people around us,
then we have the opportunity to truly have maturity, which
is what I think we're also deeply looking for and seeking.
So those are the couple of things that come to
mind from the podcast.
Speaker 3 (21:02):
We have a book WOW called what Is What Is
My Legacy?
Speaker 1 (21:09):
Contributed to our book and we're so grateful.
Speaker 3 (21:11):
For all authors of that book. And one of the
things that we talk about one is the importance of
your inner child. And one of the things that that
I talk about in the in my portion of the
book is that I have, in fact, I have a
lot of them around a childhood picture of myself in
a frame next to my bed. So that's one of
the first things that I see see in the morning
(21:33):
and last things at night. And we also talk to
people and even encourage them to even put as your screensaver,
a little version of your of yourself as your screen saver,
to you know, constantly reinforced and seeing that that little
person of you and and connecting with that, that that
inner child.
Speaker 1 (21:53):
Jane ready, just thank you guys so much for contributing
to What Is My Legacy. We're very grateful. And one
of the things that really stood out based on this
conversation is not just how trauma is within us, especially
childhood trauma, but also through oup A genetics, trauma can
be passed down from generation to generation to generation. You know,
do you have any insights on that topic.
Speaker 2 (22:12):
I personally think that it's something we have to reflect on,
and a simple way I like to reflect on it
is something I call the gifts and the gaps. And
so I believe there are certain gifts we got from
our parents, and we now expect others to give us
those same gifts. And there are certain gaps that our
parents left and we now want others to fill those gaps.
(22:36):
And I think the key in both of those scenarios
is learning to give yourself those gifts and fill those
gaps yourself. And so I think that's a very simple
entry level way into this topic or conversation that can
be really big, really scary, really challenging, which ideally you
(22:56):
do with the therapist and someone who's trained to guide
you through that journey. But for those who are moving
into that space themselves, think about what habits you repeat
because they're triggered from your parents.
Speaker 6 (23:08):
What habits you.
Speaker 2 (23:11):
Have today that maybe aren't yours but have come from
something in your past, and very quickly you'll be able
to make literal adjustments that can save your future from
your past. And that's what i'd say to people. It's
anyone who wants to save their future from their past.
We have to go backwards and heal our trauma in
(23:31):
order to move forward in a healed state. And so
that requires the ability to look back and go, where
did I pick that up? Why do I react like that?
Where does that trigger come from? And as soon as
you map it out, it's almost like this light bulb
moment where you go, oh my gosh, I had no idea,
and now you can actually edit your path forward.
Speaker 6 (23:52):
So that's the entry point i'd say for most people.
Speaker 7 (23:56):
For those listening on social media, I want to share
something with loved ones, save our future from our past.
That's something to share to their friends. I love that phrase.
Speaker 1 (24:04):
Ready, you've also had some amazing people in your podcast,
and thank you so much for what you do and
sharing such wisdom. Is there a guest or two or
a word of wisdom you can share from what's been
shared with you? For our listeners, I.
Speaker 4 (24:17):
Would say the people that have recently stood out to me.
One was gosh, Terry Cole. Actually, she talked a lot
about the way that we connect in relationships, and you know,
it was a very enlightening moment when she was talking
about how we can help the people that we love.
(24:39):
And you know, I think we have this habit of
wanting to save people in our life when they're struggling,
save people in our life when they have are going
through low moments. And that's one thing. You know, Actually,
it reminds me of when I was struggling with things
and Jay could have saved me, and instead he chose
to give me aid that in that area, he didn't
(25:02):
choose to fix it for me, he would help me
fix it for myself. And she spoke about that so deeply, saying,
most of the time we're trying to play savior to
make ourselves feel less uncomfortable, but actually you are disempowering
them by fixing it for them. You are not giving
them the tools and techniques to be able to do
that for themselves ever again. Instead you're being the savior,
(25:24):
taking the power away from them. And I found that
so fascinating. Yeah, I thought I thought that was a
really that was a topic that I had to digest
a lot because I always struggle when people around me,
or family or anyone is struggling. I struggle not to
intervene and try and fix the situation because I feel
(25:45):
uncomfortable that they're going through it.
Speaker 2 (25:47):
But I realized it's.
Speaker 4 (25:48):
So much more about giving people the tools and techniques
rather than stepping in to play savior.
Speaker 3 (25:54):
That's a big one, not only in romantic relationships, that's
a big one in parenting. To when to know when
that they need that struggle in order to garner that
that muscle, and when to you know, kind of stepping
back and not be in the instant savior even for
our children.
Speaker 4 (26:14):
Yes, exactly. So another one that was amazing actually was
Mindy Peal. She shares a lot about female hormones and
the way a woman should be living according to her
cycle rather than living according to a twenty four.
Speaker 3 (26:28):
Hours yes, because we should come there, Yes.
Speaker 4 (26:32):
And I thought that's something I think a lot of
women could really use, because hormonal issues are really going
up in women especially, and I think learning about our
hormone cycle can really help us to avoid the future
problems that women go through, whether it's difficulty through menopause,
whether it's difficulty conceiving all of that is based on
(26:55):
our hormones. And so yeah, that was another one that
I that I really learnt so much from For the.
Speaker 3 (26:59):
Man at the table, Yes, we are taught just to
like we are taught on twenty to do things on
a twenty four hour cycle, yes, which is a male cycle,
but we as women, we have a twenty eight day cycle.
And so it's really now this big movement of women
reconnecting to doing things, being in the flow, acknowledging that
(27:20):
our cycle is our cycle is longer than the way
that we're taught, which is just twenty four hours. The
men are not.
Speaker 7 (27:30):
Ahead back in a moment with Jay Shetty and his
wife Roddy after word from our.
Speaker 8 (27:35):
Partners, now back to my legacy of Jay Shetty and
(28:00):
his wife Ronning.
Speaker 3 (28:02):
We we obviously have laughed a lot today together and
and that's that's that's wonderful, and it's so important we
have to be very transparent that right now. It's it's
very difficult for so many people, and so many people
feel such an overwhelming fear, you know, disconnection, and so
(28:27):
I would really am curious to hear from both of
you what would you offer to to people that are
that are feeling that that fear, that that disconnection, the overwhelm,
the the stress good question.
Speaker 4 (28:51):
Uh, you know, the first thing that came to mind
for me is whenever I feel like things are out
of my control, or I feel like overwhelmed at what's
happening around me, or even in our own life, there's
this every time I feel like it's just me, the
problem feels really difficult to handle. But as soon as
(29:11):
I think the problem is me plus God, or me
plus the universe or something that has a much higher
power than I do, it starts to feel a little
bit more manageable. And so I find that prayer for
me has always been such a beautiful place to come
to when all other hope feels lost. I think I
get a lot of solace in prayer. And I think
(29:34):
that also connects to the idea that if we can
feel way more disconnected when we don't feel connected to ourself,
and so whether it's practices and rituals to actually connect
deeper to ourself that allows us to connect deeper to
other people and have meaningful connections with others that help
us through those times. I think reconnecting every single day
(29:58):
in some way to who you are and have those
moments are really important to be able to connect to
someone else, to be able to feel understood or valued
by other people. And yeah, I think and for me,
the main one always ends up being prayer because I'm like,
at this point, I can't control anything, so I'm leaving
up to you, but yeah, I would love to hear
(30:19):
some of yours.
Speaker 2 (30:21):
There's something called the third space theory, and it's this
idea that just around twenty five fifty years ago, we
had three spaces we lived in, We had home, we
had work, and then we had church or temple, synagogue, mosque.
And what happened is that those three spaces shrunk to
(30:43):
two spaces. We went from work to home and home
to work. And now we all know that those two
places have shrunk into one place. We work from home
and we live at home. And what's happened is not
that we've just lost three spaces, but we've lost what
that that third space provided us. So what happened at
(31:03):
church or the community center or a place of gathering
was you had a space to look back on work
and home and state and everything else and reflect on
how could I be better? What could I do differently?
Let's figure out together what the solution is, what can
we all band to do together. So the biggest challenge
(31:24):
today is that we're all feeling the same feeling, but
we're feeling it on our own. We're lonely feeling the
same thing. And there's a big difference between being lonely
feeling something and feeling belonging in feeling something. And so
what I would encourage everyone to do is go and
(31:44):
find your third space. Go and find your space of belonging.
Go and find your space of connection. Go and find
that space where you're with people of equal value, where
you can share your heart, when you can hear other peoples,
when you can open up your mind, and where you
can carry someone else's burden. I think we've just lost
that as a society, and I think these moments are
(32:06):
great reminders that we are stronger when we are working together,
we are better when we're working together, and ultimately, when
we're united and carrying each other's weight, the weight doesn't
feel as large. And I think that's the biggest challenge today,
is that we're all carrying the weight on our own
and so finding that third space, creating that third space
(32:26):
if you don't have it. The third space doesn't have
to be two hundred people, two thousand people, twenty thousand people.
It can literally be four people in a room that
are reading scripture together, that are starting a book club,
that are listening to this podcast and sharing what they
learned from you and all your amazing guests that you've
had on It starts that small, and I really feel
(32:48):
that we have to create that third space, even because
right now our third space is all of us sitting
in front of the television, and the TV screen is
the third space. The phone screen is the third spa,
and that third space isn't giving you what the original
third space gave you.
Speaker 7 (33:06):
Oh I love it. You know, both of you give
this incredible, powerful message into the world and to this universe.
You've dedicated your lives to service and to inspiration. Of course,
on my legacy, we reflect on legacy and ultimately, what
do you hope each of you your legacy will be.
Speaker 2 (33:27):
It's really interesting when I think about legacy, I think
about things that are timeless and things that will last forever.
And if I'm completely honest, I don't think anything I've done,
or said or created will last forever. I'm really grateful
I've got to be a tiny voice in the five
thousand year old history of the Vedic tradition, which has
(33:51):
come before me and will outlast me for thousands and
thousands and thousands of years. And so the legac is
the ancient wisdom that is actually timeless wisdom. It's not
ancient because it's as relevant today as it was five
thousand years ago. And the fact that those spiritual texts
I've been able to share those in my books and
(34:15):
quote them in my writing and my videos and my work.
I feel grateful I got connected. So the legacy is
really for those texts to live on, which would live
on with or without me. And so I'm not too
concerned about my personal legacy because the text will do
the work that they need to do, and those words
will have the impact that they're meant to have, with
(34:37):
or without me. I just got lucky to be a
small part of that journey.
Speaker 4 (34:41):
Yeah, I think mine might be along the same lines
of it. You know, I remember when I started sharing
anything that I was learning online, I would really struggle
because I didn't feel qualified to do it, and I
remember one of our teachers, rather than Notswami, would always
talk about being a bridge where you don't have to
be the expert, you don't have to be the endpoint,
but you can be a bridge for someone where you're
(35:02):
helping them go from one one, from one thing to
another and then passing them on to somebody else. And
I really love that, and it really helped me to
feel qualified to some degree to be able to do
that for people. And so I actually think, when I
reflect on my life, what legacy I carry off my
grandma or my mom, or my dad or anybody that's
(35:23):
been before me. It is the knowledge that they've imparted
in me, whether it's through the food that I make,
whether it's through the way that I interact with people
after having watched the way that my dad interacts with them,
whether it's the spice knowledge that my grandma has taught
me about how to heal my body through it. It's
like that information is the legacy, because every single thing
(35:45):
material can become invaluable so easily, and so I think
for me, yeah, it's being able to share all those
little moments of teachings that you've had in your life
and passing that down or two other people and have
said there is able to nourish their lives with it,
and then also pass that to other people. That makes sense.
Speaker 3 (36:05):
How beautiful that we started with your grandmother and that
we're in and we ended and we ended with your
your grandmother.
Speaker 7 (36:13):
Yeah, jin Retti, thank you for sharing your wisdom, your
love with each other in that beautiful, authentic way. The
extraordinary challenges that you've laid in front of us of
how we can all our listeners and our viewers do
small but deeply intentional things every day in our lives.
And I want to relay some of those challenges again
(36:33):
for the message that your partner is your guru. What
a beautiful thing for our listeners to say to their
loved ones, their partners after they listen to this, that
you are my guru, you are the teacher you help
me be better to say that intentionally to someone. And
then I also love the small but powerful idea of
while we're cooking, to infuse the love to say a
(36:56):
little prayer. You know, Andrea your music, you know a
little bit of love. Jane Ritty, thank you for living
your legacies every single day and reminding us that purpose
isn't something we find, It's something we create in our lives.
Speaker 2 (37:11):
Thank you such so greate all of you for creating
what felt like such a beautiful safe space. Even though
we're connected virtually, it speaks all jez It just felt
like we were all in the same roman.
Speaker 6 (37:22):
So thank you so.
Speaker 3 (37:22):
Much, Thank you for joining us. We are so grateful
to have you as part of this journey. If you
enjoy today's conversation, subscribe and share the podcast with friends, family,
and loved ones, and follow us on social media at
my Legacy Movement. At the heart of this podcast is
doctor King's vision of the beloved community and the power
(37:46):
of connection. This podcast is a testament to that vision
and the product of collective effort, enriched by the voices, stories,
and support of so many. A Legacy Plus Studio production
just distributed by iHeartMedia Creative and executive producer Suzanne Hayward
co executive producer Lisa Lyle. My Legacy podcast is available
(38:10):
on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you.
Speaker 5 (38:13):
Get your podcasts.
Speaker 3 (38:14):
Until next time, may you find connection and inspiration to
live your most fulfilled life.
Hosts And Creators
Craig Kielburger
Marc Kielburger
Martin Luther King III
Arndrea Waters King
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