May 2, 2024 • 36 mins
Langston and David talk about Kendrick Lamar's diss track to Drake and answer a listener's emails about an urban legend figure: The Bunny Man.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:03):
Motherfucking mini your self mini episode, motherfucking mini ever self.
Speaker 2 (00:13):
Some line from the Kendrick diss I didn't have time
to look up. Welcome to a man, Welcome little Mama's
and gentiles alike to another phenomenal episode of My Mama
Told Me.
Speaker 3 (00:28):
The vodcast where we dive deep, deep into the pockets
of black conspiracy theories.
Speaker 2 (00:34):
And we finally worked to prove the conspiracy theories of
you the listeners. It's a motherfucking mini.
Speaker 3 (00:43):
Episode, motherfucking mini episode, and what a what a phenomenal rebuttal.
It took a long time, but God damned, this motherfucking
shit hurt my feelings. Brother, I've been, I've been really
ever since. Oh there's listen. There's very little that I
(01:10):
personally feel like, uh in common with Drake right, Like
I think that I don't think personally that's not like
a person that I want to be or or uh
sort of see myself in. But there is something, and
I think this sort of speaks to the way that
culture is. There is something in seeing someone who looks
(01:31):
like you be annihilated that makes you get defense.
Speaker 2 (01:37):
You feel like you could catch it, you're catching astray.
Speaker 3 (01:40):
It felt like it was. It was Kendrick saying fuck
Drake and Lanston, you know what I mean, Like he's
like whispering my name underneath it. It's just was. It
(02:00):
was hurting my feelings. And I listened to it like
five times in a row, and I was like, God damn.
He didn't even and he only slightly touched that Drake's
a pedophile.
Speaker 2 (02:10):
Only grazed just the tip. He just gave a low
das and said, I'm not even gonna go that far
because I respect.
Speaker 3 (02:17):
I respect that you got a nice RnB.
Speaker 2 (02:19):
You know what would hurt my feelings is if you
dissed me and you're not rapping in a way that
feels like you're gonna be out of breath right like
all your motherfucking wind.
Speaker 3 (02:32):
That's so relaxed, Like, oh yeah, that's a really good
way to put it. He opens with that with that
sort of like a ab ass rhyme, and it's it's
mean right from the beginning, You're like, God damn, this
nigga is gonna take his time six minutes of just
(02:54):
making me feel low is fucking you know.
Speaker 2 (02:57):
Remind me is in eighth grade, we had this dude,
mister lyle and he was like, such a bad did
you ever have a teacher who was like a white
you could tell you's maybe more a rich guy and
like kind of a poor school. And he couldn't hang.
He was like that. Like at one point he yelled
(03:18):
at us and he was like, I don't know how
you can remember all the words on these rap lyrics,
but you you know what I mean. He was like
that kind of guy, you know what I mean? And Bro,
there was this one I felt bad for him. There
was this one white kid who sat in the front
and they used to bully this kid like it is
(03:38):
pretty terrible. But like when he was like, we don't
want to say nigga, it was like them whispering to
that kid, you know what I mean. It was just
like a mean, mean bullying.
Speaker 3 (03:50):
No, he told him he dresses bad.
Speaker 2 (03:53):
I hate the way that you dress.
Speaker 3 (03:55):
He said, uh, you have no relationship with your son.
You don't wake him up in the morning, which just
fell so bad. But you know, Drake doesn't wake his
son up.
Speaker 2 (04:10):
I don't think Drake has ever heated up an uncrustable.
I don't think he's opened up a juicy juice. I
don't think that is get down.
Speaker 3 (04:17):
I think he's got those those blinds on the automatic
setting and they open up and a TV turns on,
and that little odd looking baby just sort of watches
puppy balls until an adult finally sobers up.
Speaker 2 (04:36):
And ston he said, well you saying next to text
sexy rat, red juice, two bad bitches. That shit. That
shit was crazy.
Speaker 3 (04:45):
It was it was mean, and I'm excited. I like
that wrap is beefing unnecessarily. It's not even like this
came from some real place. But but apparently it is
a very real place. Apparently everybody's had to Drake this
entire time.
Speaker 2 (05:00):
Is that a surprise though? You know, in our industry
there are people who are famous who everybody hates. That's like,
that's why it makes sense to me. It's like I
see the parallels on I'm like, oh, I'm that makes
sense to me that Drake's like, nobody likes this dude,
but he's popping.
Speaker 3 (05:17):
There are But but I'm I guess I'm more surprised
at how many of them were sort of like his
closest collaborators, you know what I mean, Like it it
doesn't surprise me that a bunch of motherfuckers don't like Drake.
I can see that easy. But it did surprise me that,
like it was a list of what I thought were
(05:39):
Drake's best friends, being like, man, I've hated your guts
for years.
Speaker 2 (05:46):
I think it's just fuck you. That's so cool. He
does feel so bad.
Speaker 3 (05:53):
Right now, he's gotta feel insanely low. And what does
he call? No, I don't, yeah, just the OLV. O
can't because for.
Speaker 2 (06:04):
Are we even sure those are real people?
Speaker 3 (06:07):
He shouts out people all the time that I've never
heard of and have never se what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (06:12):
Oh, Vo, who's in ovo? Who's in it?
Speaker 3 (06:15):
Forty forty wheelchairs?
Speaker 2 (06:22):
It's just like, and I get it, you made up
a fake gang to impress your other friends. I understand. Yeah,
it's a bummer because I get it. Though it's also like,
as a soft, sensitive guy, I also feel what I'm like, Damn,
it feels like it feels like he's coming to me too.
Mm hmmm yeah, yeah, I feel like anybody who has
(06:44):
any weakness anywhere in them.
Speaker 3 (06:49):
Yeah, No, I think I think I think weak men
united in both our our fear and appreciation for They're like, Damn,
that's a dude, that's a centered adult. Is a grown
man talking down to a chi.
Speaker 2 (07:08):
He's not writing checks based on foolery, which is pretty
much my full bank account. You ever get it checking,
you're like, damn, I talked about pussy for this.
Speaker 3 (07:20):
That it's really when you when you're like, this was
a scam. I think I just scammed the system and
I ain't going to your high that's crazy, though. We
gotta get you. We got to get you back doing burpees.
Speaker 2 (07:34):
Man, No, that sucks. Burpee sucks. They're like the worst bro.
They do suck, but but they're effective. I think, Yeah,
I mean that's why they do it in prison.
Speaker 3 (07:45):
Right, Yeah, I've heard.
Speaker 2 (07:47):
I don't. I don't know.
Speaker 4 (07:48):
I'm not.
Speaker 2 (07:49):
You never do burpanes though, you never read to do
it like high school?
Speaker 3 (07:52):
Oh no, I do them now? Yeah?
Speaker 2 (07:55):
But do you do the Kendricks where you end with
the like what you face towards lie and you end with.
Speaker 3 (08:01):
The no, I'm a I'm a sinner. There's no uh,
I like that. There's no praise and worship attached to
my working out. There's just self hatred and a desperate
want to make five to ten pounds leave my body.
Speaker 2 (08:22):
I mean, honestly, I think both things are as effective.
Speaker 3 (08:25):
Self hatred and worship of God.
Speaker 2 (08:28):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I either way to probably get you
to where you need to be going.
Speaker 3 (08:31):
I think I think we all just need a motivator,
and whatever that motivator is, it be it self hatred.
Speaker 5 (08:38):
You have a family, yeah, yeah, yeah, I love that
your hatred for yourself is a higher motivator.
Speaker 1 (08:52):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (08:53):
Man, I'm not going to pull back on this. Yes,
it's complicated in myself, my whole life. I just got
a family. I met them recently. Oh man, I barely
know my daughter. But but me, I know me well
(09:16):
and no thanks to me, I know my true Yeah,
and they are murky fucking like me. So I gotta
I gotta keep working.
Speaker 2 (09:29):
Anyways, We're not just here to talk about why, like
since got those killer abs that he's got, you could
get away. I don't bro if I was not. If
you're like a ben not shut off guy, why don't
you just lie and say you have abs? You think
these fucking people know any different.
Speaker 3 (09:46):
The problem is, and this is I've been thinking about
this recently. The problem is is that for casting, I
often get casted as a do with abs and that
gets complicated when the veal happens and you ain't got
what they were hoping for.
Speaker 2 (10:04):
Oh that is a new kind of body shame. I
don't even understand.
Speaker 4 (10:07):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (10:08):
Yo.
Speaker 2 (10:08):
So they're like, you click called in as a heart
throb and they're like, okay, take it off. You got
like a lot muscle tone your body. That's all. You know.
Speaker 3 (10:23):
It's crazy. It's not even bad. It's not even like,
uh what the type ship? Thanks? Man, It's just not good,
you know what I mean. And when you they cast
you as a heart throb for television, they're like, it's
gotta be good. You gotta be tight. Yeah, it's gotta yeah.
Speaker 1 (10:44):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (10:45):
And then it's just like, oh, man, I got that
same body. We could have casted me for that, and yeah,
what do you want for me? I didn't I tell jokes, y'all.
Y'all are idiots. Yeah, you're the one that's not vanity.
Speaker 2 (10:58):
Man. I've never been a heart throw but I think
I could do it for a season. I don't think
I could live that lifetime.
Speaker 3 (11:04):
I think a lot of people will feel that way.
I think they are like, oh, I would like to
be the heart throb, And then I think you what
you want is for it to be temporary. I don't
think you want it to be a permanent issue. I
think no, no, no, no. Look at Michael B. Jordan,
You know what I mean?
Speaker 2 (11:18):
I think I think bro. People always call me a hater.
I've maintained I think he's a terrible actor. I don't
think he's a terrible actor. I don't think he's a
great one. Okay, that's not fair. I don't think he's
a great I think there are very few movie stars
who are as poor of an actor as he is.
Speaker 3 (11:35):
I think that's fair.
Speaker 2 (11:36):
Does that make sense? There's just no personality on anything
he does, Like Will smith Man, regardless of where he
is right now, straight on, such a charismatic person you
know what I mean? So many of these movies starres
so charismatic. Michael B. Jordan is just like, he's just
so boring to me. Throw me in the ways with
(11:57):
my ancestors.
Speaker 3 (11:59):
Yeah. And I think he found himself in a very
unfortunate position where so much of his casting booking value
was connected to him having that sexy ass body, and
then it became like, okay, well I have to just
be more sexy body than even talented individual, you know
(12:20):
what I mean, Like we are, we are wanting to
see the abs more than we're even expecting you to
have range. And now he can't move his shoulders all
the way. So even if he wanted to play, you know,
a different kind of role, it just is a buff
ass dude pretending it's not a fucking you know what
(12:40):
I mean?
Speaker 2 (12:41):
And I say this knowing fully well that I would
have been the person. Remember when that lady interviewed him
and he like made fun of her for calling him
corny that you want to talk about? That was my
I was happy for him, I but I was like, man,
that's gonna there's that I was not cool too.
Speaker 3 (13:02):
I'm sure, oh, you felt like you were the lady
more than you felt like you were him.
Speaker 2 (13:07):
Way more. I'm not that rich, oh, me and the
ladies bank accounts are closer than me, you know what
I'm saying, Like I do all right, but I'm not.
I don't own anything.
Speaker 3 (13:22):
I guess I wasn't thinking about it in terms of wealth.
I was just more like emotionally, I remember people who
you know, we were not nice, and it was like
a great hero moment for him to be like hey,
I remember, but it's okay, It's okay.
Speaker 2 (13:39):
But also, let's be honest, he was corny in high school.
Of course I'm going to be an actor. Of course
the fuck of course I would have made fun of
him too. I'm not the hero in this.
Speaker 3 (13:54):
Story, but I definitely we all have enemies, do you
know what I mean? And it was nice to see
somebody come out fucking yeah, get to confront their enemy
and be classy. It was.
Speaker 2 (14:06):
It was cool. It's cool, but the bad part of
me always I only want to see bullies physically bested.
I'm not saying he should have hit that woman, but
I'm saying that, like, had he got his girlfriend to
do it, I would think that was cool.
Speaker 3 (14:23):
Yeah, it would have been cool if you went, hey,
lady bodyguard.
Speaker 2 (14:26):
Yeah yeah, yeah, she dropped that bitch.
Speaker 3 (14:32):
Because a lady in a three piece black suit just
comes and karate chops the ship out of this lady
from his high school.
Speaker 2 (14:40):
I wish I could tell you how many times in
my life I wish I had lady hitters to go
they whenever I've needed them. I've never had one, but
because I got bully more by girls. Oh yeah, so
I remember just being like sister. It was not even
bullying in the same It was just like, Yo, this
(15:01):
girl's I'm my fucking bumper all the time, you.
Speaker 3 (15:04):
Know, right, I just need somebody that's gonna make them shaky,
share a little more shaky in their behavior.
Speaker 2 (15:10):
But not on my bumper in the way where it's
like maybe I could convert it into getting right.
Speaker 3 (15:16):
This isn't flirting. This is just antagonizing.
Speaker 2 (15:19):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, So that's all the girls who wore dickies.
Fuck remember dickies girls. That's like such a specific genre.
Speaker 3 (15:33):
We can't talk about this all day. We got an email.
Speaker 2 (15:37):
Olivia said, pitch, this could be the video episode Fighting
Girls combination. Remember, yeah, man, And this is the end
of it. When he started speaking in that Canadian accent,
that's that's tough, man, and that's we all think you
guys talk funny up there.
Speaker 3 (15:58):
There's so much footage of him being a little d weep,
and they're they're just gonna keep Metro is gonna like
mixing just bad the grassy clip to bad the grassy
clip into everybody's shit. It's gonna go on forever. And
he I just don't know if Drake has a stamina.
(16:19):
I will say this to his credit before we and
we'll move on from this in a second. To his credit,
he has shown more fight than I thought he could
given the circumstances against him.
Speaker 2 (16:35):
I mean, to be to be a rapper, you have
to be able to take a punch. And I do
think even the bad rappers like you gotta because it's
just such a that's just how that shit is, you
know what I mean?
Speaker 3 (16:46):
And I do think, like him or not, Drake is
a great rapper, Like I do think he legitimately like
he's funny and he kind of like is able to
kind of like do bits, you know, even.
Speaker 2 (17:00):
Yeah, when really the only thing is I agree with Kendrick.
The only thing I don't like is the tough talking ship. Really,
I was just like, but everything else he does I fun. Man.
Speaker 3 (17:12):
Yeah, he's a fun guy, and so it's always got a.
Speaker 2 (17:14):
Great summer song, always got a great summer song.
Speaker 3 (17:18):
Dude, Passion Fruit is better than everybody who's ever dissed him,
you know what I mean? Like that song enough is
better than anything anybody else has made.
Speaker 2 (17:28):
Drake gets me on ship that's not even for me,
you know how much I like nice for what, like
for real, Like, I love that song. It's a great song.
It's so good. That has nothing to do with me.
Speaker 3 (17:42):
No, no, in fact, in fact that you're You're part
of the problem in the song.
Speaker 2 (17:47):
I'm the one who wants to him. I'm the one
who's like you.
Speaker 3 (17:54):
He was talking to them, dicky girls when uh, when
you don't. We're calling upon you because we have new merch.
We have very exciting merch that we are now selling
(18:17):
and it's fucking great. We love it so much.
Speaker 2 (18:20):
Just sleek, it's sexy.
Speaker 3 (18:23):
Come on, you want to tell them what we have?
Speaker 2 (18:25):
Yeah, we have three different types of hats, which is
really fun. We have a two tone hat, an alien
dad hat, the traditional logo in black and khaki. Then
we have the enamel pin with an alien who has
a cooofie on it since my mama told me. And
then we have t shirts that say proud little Mama,
which is who you are.
Speaker 3 (18:44):
Yeah, you can buy the merch now, go to my
mama told me dot merch table dot com. It's a
brand new name, but it's the same old merch and
we would love for you to get some if you
haven't got it already. And we want you to have
all the sweet stuff, so get it.
Speaker 4 (19:02):
All right.
Speaker 3 (19:03):
We got an email twenty minutes. Then we got an
email twenty minutes. Then we got an email from a
person named Shelley. Shelley sent us an email and she said, Hi,
David and Langston. I was recently introduced to your podcast
via the socials. I loved the podcast, like legit, fuck
with y'all. Thank you. I'm working my way through the episodes,
(19:23):
and I'm not sure if you guys have already covered this,
so my bad if you did. I'm born and raised
in Baltimore, Maryland, and growing up there there was an
urban legend going around the city about the bunny Man.
It was a man dressed in a bunny suit going
around attacking people with a big ass knife. Had the
kids in my neighborhood shook. I'm not sure if it
(19:45):
was just a black neighborhood thing, but people who I
met at college HBCU from this region also knew about
the bunny Man. Was that a thing in your neighborhoods
growing up? Thanks for sharing your craft best, Shelley, not
at all. Never heard of the bunny man for in
my life.
Speaker 2 (20:00):
I mean, I yeah, it's really interesting. I don't know
if it's a timing thing, because that seems to be
like a more of a seventies eighties thing than a
nineties thing, like this idea of like some mass predator,
you know what I mean, or even like like even
growing up, I didn't hear about it, like even in
(20:21):
the media, like there was no there weren't a lot
of serial killers or anything like that. Does that make
you know what I mean?
Speaker 3 (20:29):
Yeah, I mean, certainly the serial killer part of it,
I will say, And we've talked about it a few
times on the podcast Homie. The clown was a very
real thing for Chicago kids, and that, certainly in the
nineties was still a thing we believed and we're telling
people about and all that shit of like this murderous
(20:49):
man and a clown and a white or a clown
costume and a white van snatching up babies. But I
do take your point that it was more it's certain
felt more like an active threat probably in the seventies
and eighties when serial killers were at their height. Well,
we ain't got serial killers no more.
Speaker 2 (21:09):
I don't know because we I mean, DC was the
last one that I remember that it was like we
as a nation were like you know what I mean, Yeah,
I think we got school shootings now though that's.
Speaker 3 (21:23):
True and that's almost serial killing, but like faster.
Speaker 2 (21:27):
Which do you ever were you? I don't know how
to word this correctly.
Speaker 3 (21:32):
I'm excited either way.
Speaker 2 (21:34):
I was talking to my girl the other day and
I remember I was telling her about how one time,
so I, yeah, I told you, I went to a
sh a bunch of schools. One of the schools I
went to one of the junior high schools. It was
at the bottom of a hill and a high school
was at the top of the hill, like the adjoining
high school or whatever. And they had shot somebody at
(21:56):
the high school. But it wasn't like it wasn't like Colin.
It was just like one guy shot like two guys. Yeah,
and we locked down and all that, Like we couldn't
go home for like an hour after school shit. But
that shit wasn't even on the news. Yeah, but that's poverty, right, yes,
(22:18):
not the but it like we because Colmback was a
very nice school. People don't realize that. It's like it's
like a sports powerhouse. It's a very nice school.
Speaker 3 (22:30):
I went to school down the street from not down
the street, but our neighborhood, Oak Park is adjacent to
a neighborhood called Maywood, and they're not right next to each other,
but they're pretty close to each other. And Maywood is
a predominantly black neighborhood. A lot less money, a lot
obviously less funding for the school. There were shootings all
(22:52):
the time. It PROVIDESO East the high school that was
in Maywood, and that shit was never it's like a
real problem. It was just treated like gang violence and
sort of retaliation whatever they were calling it, instead of
recognizing that, like, yo, there's something fundamentally broken in our system,
(23:12):
whether you even if you do associated with gangs. Why
are we not assessing the the greater sort of like
problem in the fact that this all exists for these
students who have to go to school every single day.
Speaker 2 (23:24):
That's fair because also now that I'm thinking about it,
we only had to stay after like an.
Speaker 3 (23:29):
Hour, just long enough.
Speaker 2 (23:34):
It was like they had like come on the in
they had come on the intercom like a little bit
before last period, and then they let us go to
the buses like yeah, like an hour yeah, probably like
an hour later, yeah, no, which I was pissed. I
remember because that's when Dragon ball Z was on Cartoon Network.
(23:55):
Remember that, Yeah, yeah, that was that was during that
and I was like, but I I also wasn't telling
anybody I was watching it, So it's doing inside.
Speaker 3 (24:03):
It is a crazy thing that we used to have
to be like anime heads in secret, relaxed.
Speaker 2 (24:09):
I watched one show, not a fucking nerd.
Speaker 3 (24:12):
Oh well, I was a fucking nerd, and I couldn't
tell nobody nothing.
Speaker 2 (24:18):
No, it was not cool. Nobody wanted to but dragon
ball Z it was not like nobody couldn't be Like
Goku's been making the spirit bomb for days.
Speaker 3 (24:29):
I listen. I've never been a very big fan of
any of my step parents, and I've had more than most.
Speaker 2 (24:39):
Sometimes you give a peek behind the curtain and it's chilling.
Speaker 3 (24:42):
Listen. My dad's been married three, my mom's been married
for There's a whole lot of these motherfuckers.
Speaker 2 (24:48):
That is a lot. Look at you that you're killing.
Speaker 3 (24:52):
I never liked none of them enough. But but I
will say my mom's second husband used to have like
a bunch of the tapes that he, I guess, had
either recorded or bought on some weird website whatever. But
he had tape dragon Ball Z tapes that I would
like watch, and they had like the whole Freezer arc
(25:14):
all the shit. Man. I used to go crazy watching
that shit. And then once Cartoon Network finally got to Nami, it.
Speaker 2 (25:23):
Was so you were before that.
Speaker 3 (25:25):
Even I've been on anime since I was a boy
boy wow, I mean, not a prete. I was a
boy being like, this is the future of me.
Speaker 2 (25:37):
That's so because I got lucky. I had a friend
in elementary school and he told me about dragon Ball
because dragon Ball used to come on a wz WB
the first dragon Ball like when he was when Goku
was a little boy, and I used to watch that.
And then I just happened to fall in to dragon
Ball Z because I was like, oh, I like that,
(25:59):
but like it didn't go and I had seen Ninja
scrolling didn't like it because I was just like, I
don't want to put a sword in some of these pussy.
I don't think that's cool.
Speaker 3 (26:15):
I'm not sure. I'm not sure how the bunny Man
got us here, and frankly, I'm not sure that matters.
I will say that Olivia sent us a little bit
of information. She said The bunny Man is an urban
legend that originated from two incidents in Fairfax County, Virginia.
So that makes sense. Baltimore, Maryland. You know DMB all
(26:38):
sort of connected in nineteen seventy.
Speaker 2 (26:41):
You were right.
Speaker 3 (26:41):
This is a seventies born sort of conspiracy, but has
been spread throughout the Washington, DC, and Maryland areas. The
legend has many variations, most involved a man wearing a
rabbit costume who attacks people with an axe or hatchet.
So big ass knife. That's just little babies translating. Most
of the stories occur around Colchester Overpass, a Southern Railway
(27:05):
overpass manning Colchester Road near Clifton, Virginia, sometimes referred to
as bunny Man Bridge. This motherfucker got his own bridge.
That makes me feel like that really happened at least once. Yeah, Yeah,
that's there. Really was a bunny Man. He just wasn't
like still out on the loose, right. It is the
(27:30):
scary thing, And if we can sort of connect the
bigger sort of conversation inside of all of this, it
is sort of the scary thing. Of what urban legend
is is that it often is born from at least
some version of a real incident, and so your fears,
your parents' fears, all these people who warn you about
(27:52):
the horrible things that might happen to you, obviously are
sometimes being hyperbolic or extreme in their response. But it's
not because it's impossible. It's just that, like, it's unlikely
ninety nine percent of the time, right I most of
us are not gonna encounter the bunny Man, but somebody
will and that's fucking crazy.
Speaker 2 (28:14):
And that's all it takes for it to spread. I
feel like, in extreme cases of anything, it's just like
it only needs to happen once, you.
Speaker 3 (28:22):
Know, Yeah, you just need one bunny man and now
he can become sort of like this permanent fixture in
our minds forever.
Speaker 2 (28:30):
And it'll always It's it's almost kind of beautiful, isn't
the word. But it's like such an interesting thing about humanity.
How like Lord could like that could just live regionally,
you know what I'm saying. He stabs some drunk guy
left sears after taking pictures all day, stabs some guy
on a bridge, and then we still are talking about
(28:53):
it forty years later, fifty years.
Speaker 3 (28:55):
In a crazy way, it's it's kind of the only
way you really live forever.
Speaker 2 (29:02):
I feel like this is an origin story right now.
Speaker 1 (29:06):
You said.
Speaker 3 (29:11):
I think I found my purpose.
Speaker 2 (29:13):
You just look off into the distance.
Speaker 6 (29:22):
But you know what I'm saying is I do we
spend you and I We've spent our entire lives sort
of like wanting to create legacy through being silly billies
and telling our jokes and shit.
Speaker 3 (29:34):
And the unfortunate reality is that these jokes are temporary,
and that like whatever permanence we have is eventually going
to fade. We can't all remain forever, despite our skill
or hope whatever, our skill being a lot more timely
than murder exactly. But like the murder sort of has
(29:55):
like an evergreen quality to it, especially if you do
it in a in a crazy enough way.
Speaker 2 (30:01):
You're once again venturing back in the order. I'm just saying,
you're speaking about it.
Speaker 3 (30:10):
Look, dog, I'm just saying, Jeffrey Dahmer is gonna last
way longer than Ralph Barbosa, Do you know what I mean?
Like I'm saying, the imprint is far more vast.
Speaker 2 (30:33):
That's my boy, That's that's true. That's true. We will
It doesn't matter how good your drake. This joke was
nobody will remember in probably ten years now.
Speaker 3 (30:47):
But the fuck if you if you fucking chop up
a kid and put him in your freezer, eat him up,
eat him up, eat him up, Everybody's gonna be like, hey,
you know, people be chopping out kids and putting them
in freeze, just like just like length's doing.
Speaker 2 (31:07):
Well. I think we did it.
Speaker 3 (31:08):
I think we did it. I think I think if
we could wrap put a little bow on this bad boy, Shelley.
It sounds like the bunny Man, while probably not an
active threat, you can rest easy, uh, is not completely fabricated.
It probably is rooted in some real experience that somebody
had on a really fucked up overpass in Virginia, and
(31:32):
my best suggestion would be to stay away from said
overpass and overpasses in general. Maybe just concentrate on getting
your ass home and connecting with the people who care
about you so that the bunny Man or a bunny
man like figure does not find you in the future.
You want to tell the people where they can find
you and what cool shit you got?
Speaker 2 (31:52):
Oh yeah, who got jokes eighty seven on Instagram. I
am shooting my own special uh funded producing it myself
is Kyle Birth of a Nation spelled with the G.
There will be some graphics.
Speaker 3 (32:12):
That's funny. That's very funny.
Speaker 2 (32:14):
There will be some graphics forthcoming. But I'm shooting it
in Denver, May eighteenth. I would love for you to
come out and get tickets. If not, it's gonna come
out about a month later. Sign up for my Patreon
Patreon dot com backslash David Bori. All the content is free.
I've given you just little tour stories videos. I gotta
(32:36):
I do front facing Fridays. It's the old thing. The
only thing I will ever charge you for is the
ten dollars for that special. But go online and if
you're in Denver, buy tickets. I would love to see
as many little mamas there as possible, so that once again.
Patreon dot com backslash David Bori and Cool Guy Jokes
eighty seven on Instagram.
Speaker 3 (32:55):
Okay, go see the special.
Speaker 4 (32:58):
Come go fucking go do that. We're almost streat Yeah,
that's fucking beautiful. I'm excited to see it all come
together and uh, as always, you can follow me at
Langston Kerman on on all social media platforms.
Speaker 3 (33:12):
I am. I'm available wherever you want to find me.
Oh and if you if you are in the Los
Angeles area this weekend, we are almost sold out at
the Comedy Store May fifth, David's Birthday, seven pm sharp.
We got to start on fucking time with really.
Speaker 2 (33:31):
Do because they're fucking us.
Speaker 3 (33:33):
We cannot afford to waste a minute, so we are
starting at seven pm sharp. We're excited for you all
to come out as part of the Netflix It's a
Joke comedy festival. And again the tickets are almost sold out,
but we would love for you to be there, So
come on out, come do the thing. And if you
want to send us your own drops, your own conspiracy theories,
if you want to tell us that the individuals you
(33:56):
know to have been personally attacked by the bunny Man,
send it all to my a pod at gmail dot com.
We would love to hear from you. By the merch.
We we hope that the merch is moving and continues
to be Uh. We want to see it live, show
up with fucking hats.
Speaker 2 (34:12):
We'll sign your titties.
Speaker 3 (34:15):
Yeah, we'll sign. We'll sign the merchant. Hey, we'll sign
what's underneath the merchant.
Speaker 2 (34:20):
Have you ever signed a titty before?
Speaker 3 (34:21):
I have two titties so far in my career.
Speaker 2 (34:24):
You know, I want to know one of my proudest stats,
I signed the titty before I ever did stand up comedy.
Speaker 3 (34:30):
Holy ship.
Speaker 2 (34:31):
Yeah, the house party is I was really going for
it for a while. Whoa, Yeah, it's amazing.
Speaker 3 (34:37):
It's amazing that you you didn't peak right there, someone
said I did. Fuck Yeah, that was pretty cool.
Speaker 2 (34:44):
And she kept it on all the whole like I
don't know. I guess she wouldn't have watched off for
titty at the party, but it was.
Speaker 1 (34:49):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (34:50):
I was about to say, that's that part is not
as surprising.
Speaker 2 (34:53):
That's the problem with those disposable cameras though you can't
even find the pictures.
Speaker 3 (34:57):
Ah fuck right.
Speaker 2 (35:00):
Olivia is right. Also, we're gonna sell merch there.
Speaker 3 (35:03):
Yeah, merch merch at the live show. So if you
do not show up with a hat or a T
shirt or a pen, we can fix that. We can
solve that problem right there.
Speaker 2 (35:11):
And it's always cash is king, you know what I'm saying. Yeah,
you bring cash, Maybe we don't have to cut everybody here,
and we give Olivia a little taste, let her weather beak.
Speaker 3 (35:22):
I mean, maybe Will Ferrell doesn't have to see any
any kickback.
Speaker 2 (35:29):
He's doing great. You've all seen.
Speaker 3 (35:33):
He's fine. And and most importantly, if like, subscribe, rate, review,
do whatever you're supposed to do to make this podcast thrive,
that certainly is everything we needed to say. Bye, bitch,
Oh my.
Speaker 2 (35:51):
Gosh, get the cat out of here.
Speaker 1 (35:55):
Oh absolutely not cat, you got to go. Motherfucking mini
ever sew Mini episode Moll the fucking Mini ever sew Well,
the fucking mini episode, Mini episode All the fucking Mini
(36:19):
ever s
Motherfucking mini your self mini episode, motherfucking mini ever self.
Speaker 2 (00:13):
Some line from the Kendrick diss I didn't have time
to look up. Welcome to a man, Welcome little Mama's
and gentiles alike to another phenomenal episode of My Mama
Told Me.
Speaker 3 (00:28):
The vodcast where we dive deep, deep into the pockets
of black conspiracy theories.
Speaker 2 (00:34):
And we finally worked to prove the conspiracy theories of
you the listeners. It's a motherfucking mini.
Speaker 3 (00:43):
Episode, motherfucking mini episode, and what a what a phenomenal rebuttal.
It took a long time, but God damned, this motherfucking
shit hurt my feelings. Brother, I've been, I've been really
ever since. Oh there's listen. There's very little that I
(01:10):
personally feel like, uh in common with Drake right, Like
I think that I don't think personally that's not like
a person that I want to be or or uh
sort of see myself in. But there is something, and
I think this sort of speaks to the way that
culture is. There is something in seeing someone who looks
(01:31):
like you be annihilated that makes you get defense.
Speaker 2 (01:37):
You feel like you could catch it, you're catching astray.
Speaker 3 (01:40):
It felt like it was. It was Kendrick saying fuck
Drake and Lanston, you know what I mean, Like he's
like whispering my name underneath it. It's just was. It
(02:00):
was hurting my feelings. And I listened to it like
five times in a row, and I was like, God damn.
He didn't even and he only slightly touched that Drake's
a pedophile.
Speaker 2 (02:10):
Only grazed just the tip. He just gave a low
das and said, I'm not even gonna go that far
because I respect.
Speaker 3 (02:17):
I respect that you got a nice RnB.
Speaker 2 (02:19):
You know what would hurt my feelings is if you
dissed me and you're not rapping in a way that
feels like you're gonna be out of breath right like
all your motherfucking wind.
Speaker 3 (02:32):
That's so relaxed, Like, oh yeah, that's a really good
way to put it. He opens with that with that
sort of like a ab ass rhyme, and it's it's
mean right from the beginning, You're like, God damn, this
nigga is gonna take his time six minutes of just
(02:54):
making me feel low is fucking you know.
Speaker 2 (02:57):
Remind me is in eighth grade, we had this dude,
mister lyle and he was like, such a bad did
you ever have a teacher who was like a white
you could tell you's maybe more a rich guy and
like kind of a poor school. And he couldn't hang.
He was like that. Like at one point he yelled
(03:18):
at us and he was like, I don't know how
you can remember all the words on these rap lyrics,
but you you know what I mean. He was like
that kind of guy, you know what I mean? And Bro,
there was this one I felt bad for him. There
was this one white kid who sat in the front
and they used to bully this kid like it is
(03:38):
pretty terrible. But like when he was like, we don't
want to say nigga, it was like them whispering to
that kid, you know what I mean. It was just
like a mean, mean bullying.
Speaker 3 (03:50):
No, he told him he dresses bad.
Speaker 2 (03:53):
I hate the way that you dress.
Speaker 3 (03:55):
He said, uh, you have no relationship with your son.
You don't wake him up in the morning, which just
fell so bad. But you know, Drake doesn't wake his
son up.
Speaker 2 (04:10):
I don't think Drake has ever heated up an uncrustable.
I don't think he's opened up a juicy juice. I
don't think that is get down.
Speaker 3 (04:17):
I think he's got those those blinds on the automatic
setting and they open up and a TV turns on,
and that little odd looking baby just sort of watches
puppy balls until an adult finally sobers up.
Speaker 2 (04:36):
And ston he said, well you saying next to text
sexy rat, red juice, two bad bitches. That shit. That
shit was crazy.
Speaker 3 (04:45):
It was it was mean, and I'm excited. I like
that wrap is beefing unnecessarily. It's not even like this
came from some real place. But but apparently it is
a very real place. Apparently everybody's had to Drake this
entire time.
Speaker 2 (05:00):
Is that a surprise though? You know, in our industry
there are people who are famous who everybody hates. That's like,
that's why it makes sense to me. It's like I
see the parallels on I'm like, oh, I'm that makes
sense to me that Drake's like, nobody likes this dude,
but he's popping.
Speaker 3 (05:17):
There are But but I'm I guess I'm more surprised
at how many of them were sort of like his
closest collaborators, you know what I mean, Like it it
doesn't surprise me that a bunch of motherfuckers don't like Drake.
I can see that easy. But it did surprise me that,
like it was a list of what I thought were
(05:39):
Drake's best friends, being like, man, I've hated your guts
for years.
Speaker 2 (05:46):
I think it's just fuck you. That's so cool. He
does feel so bad.
Speaker 3 (05:53):
Right now, he's gotta feel insanely low. And what does
he call? No, I don't, yeah, just the OLV. O
can't because for.
Speaker 2 (06:04):
Are we even sure those are real people?
Speaker 3 (06:07):
He shouts out people all the time that I've never
heard of and have never se what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (06:12):
Oh, Vo, who's in ovo? Who's in it?
Speaker 3 (06:15):
Forty forty wheelchairs?
Speaker 2 (06:22):
It's just like, and I get it, you made up
a fake gang to impress your other friends. I understand. Yeah,
it's a bummer because I get it. Though it's also like,
as a soft, sensitive guy, I also feel what I'm like, Damn,
it feels like it feels like he's coming to me too.
Mm hmmm yeah, yeah, I feel like anybody who has
(06:44):
any weakness anywhere in them.
Speaker 3 (06:49):
Yeah, No, I think I think I think weak men
united in both our our fear and appreciation for They're like, Damn,
that's a dude, that's a centered adult. Is a grown
man talking down to a chi.
Speaker 2 (07:08):
He's not writing checks based on foolery, which is pretty
much my full bank account. You ever get it checking,
you're like, damn, I talked about pussy for this.
Speaker 3 (07:20):
That it's really when you when you're like, this was
a scam. I think I just scammed the system and
I ain't going to your high that's crazy, though. We
gotta get you. We got to get you back doing burpees.
Speaker 2 (07:34):
Man, No, that sucks. Burpee sucks. They're like the worst bro.
They do suck, but but they're effective. I think, Yeah,
I mean that's why they do it in prison.
Speaker 3 (07:45):
Right, Yeah, I've heard.
Speaker 2 (07:47):
I don't. I don't know.
Speaker 4 (07:48):
I'm not.
Speaker 2 (07:49):
You never do burpanes though, you never read to do
it like high school?
Speaker 3 (07:52):
Oh no, I do them now? Yeah?
Speaker 2 (07:55):
But do you do the Kendricks where you end with
the like what you face towards lie and you end with.
Speaker 3 (08:01):
The no, I'm a I'm a sinner. There's no uh,
I like that. There's no praise and worship attached to
my working out. There's just self hatred and a desperate
want to make five to ten pounds leave my body.
Speaker 2 (08:22):
I mean, honestly, I think both things are as effective.
Speaker 3 (08:25):
Self hatred and worship of God.
Speaker 2 (08:28):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I either way to probably get you
to where you need to be going.
Speaker 3 (08:31):
I think I think we all just need a motivator,
and whatever that motivator is, it be it self hatred.
Speaker 5 (08:38):
You have a family, yeah, yeah, yeah, I love that
your hatred for yourself is a higher motivator.
Speaker 1 (08:52):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (08:53):
Man, I'm not going to pull back on this. Yes,
it's complicated in myself, my whole life. I just got
a family. I met them recently. Oh man, I barely
know my daughter. But but me, I know me well
(09:16):
and no thanks to me, I know my true Yeah,
and they are murky fucking like me. So I gotta
I gotta keep working.
Speaker 2 (09:29):
Anyways, We're not just here to talk about why, like
since got those killer abs that he's got, you could
get away. I don't bro if I was not. If
you're like a ben not shut off guy, why don't
you just lie and say you have abs? You think
these fucking people know any different.
Speaker 3 (09:46):
The problem is, and this is I've been thinking about
this recently. The problem is is that for casting, I
often get casted as a do with abs and that
gets complicated when the veal happens and you ain't got
what they were hoping for.
Speaker 2 (10:04):
Oh that is a new kind of body shame. I
don't even understand.
Speaker 4 (10:07):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (10:08):
Yo.
Speaker 2 (10:08):
So they're like, you click called in as a heart
throb and they're like, okay, take it off. You got
like a lot muscle tone your body. That's all. You know.
Speaker 3 (10:23):
It's crazy. It's not even bad. It's not even like,
uh what the type ship? Thanks? Man, It's just not good,
you know what I mean. And when you they cast
you as a heart throb for television, they're like, it's
gotta be good. You gotta be tight. Yeah, it's gotta yeah.
Speaker 1 (10:44):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (10:45):
And then it's just like, oh, man, I got that
same body. We could have casted me for that, and yeah,
what do you want for me? I didn't I tell jokes, y'all.
Y'all are idiots. Yeah, you're the one that's not vanity.
Speaker 2 (10:58):
Man. I've never been a heart throw but I think
I could do it for a season. I don't think
I could live that lifetime.
Speaker 3 (11:04):
I think a lot of people will feel that way.
I think they are like, oh, I would like to
be the heart throb, And then I think you what
you want is for it to be temporary. I don't
think you want it to be a permanent issue. I
think no, no, no, no. Look at Michael B. Jordan,
You know what I mean?
Speaker 2 (11:18):
I think I think bro. People always call me a hater.
I've maintained I think he's a terrible actor. I don't
think he's a terrible actor. I don't think he's a
great one. Okay, that's not fair. I don't think he's
a great I think there are very few movie stars
who are as poor of an actor as he is.
Speaker 3 (11:35):
I think that's fair.
Speaker 2 (11:36):
Does that make sense? There's just no personality on anything
he does, Like Will smith Man, regardless of where he
is right now, straight on, such a charismatic person you
know what I mean? So many of these movies starres
so charismatic. Michael B. Jordan is just like, he's just
so boring to me. Throw me in the ways with
(11:57):
my ancestors.
Speaker 3 (11:59):
Yeah. And I think he found himself in a very
unfortunate position where so much of his casting booking value
was connected to him having that sexy ass body, and
then it became like, okay, well I have to just
be more sexy body than even talented individual, you know
(12:20):
what I mean, Like we are, we are wanting to
see the abs more than we're even expecting you to
have range. And now he can't move his shoulders all
the way. So even if he wanted to play, you know,
a different kind of role, it just is a buff
ass dude pretending it's not a fucking you know what
(12:40):
I mean?
Speaker 2 (12:41):
And I say this knowing fully well that I would
have been the person. Remember when that lady interviewed him
and he like made fun of her for calling him
corny that you want to talk about? That was my
I was happy for him, I but I was like, man,
that's gonna there's that I was not cool too.
Speaker 3 (13:02):
I'm sure, oh, you felt like you were the lady
more than you felt like you were him.
Speaker 2 (13:07):
Way more. I'm not that rich, oh, me and the
ladies bank accounts are closer than me, you know what
I'm saying, Like I do all right, but I'm not.
I don't own anything.
Speaker 3 (13:22):
I guess I wasn't thinking about it in terms of wealth.
I was just more like emotionally, I remember people who
you know, we were not nice, and it was like
a great hero moment for him to be like hey,
I remember, but it's okay, It's okay.
Speaker 2 (13:39):
But also, let's be honest, he was corny in high school.
Of course I'm going to be an actor. Of course
the fuck of course I would have made fun of
him too. I'm not the hero in this.
Speaker 3 (13:54):
Story, but I definitely we all have enemies, do you
know what I mean? And it was nice to see
somebody come out fucking yeah, get to confront their enemy
and be classy. It was.
Speaker 2 (14:06):
It was cool. It's cool, but the bad part of
me always I only want to see bullies physically bested.
I'm not saying he should have hit that woman, but
I'm saying that, like, had he got his girlfriend to
do it, I would think that was cool.
Speaker 3 (14:23):
Yeah, it would have been cool if you went, hey,
lady bodyguard.
Speaker 2 (14:26):
Yeah yeah, yeah, she dropped that bitch.
Speaker 3 (14:32):
Because a lady in a three piece black suit just
comes and karate chops the ship out of this lady
from his high school.
Speaker 2 (14:40):
I wish I could tell you how many times in
my life I wish I had lady hitters to go
they whenever I've needed them. I've never had one, but
because I got bully more by girls. Oh yeah, so
I remember just being like sister. It was not even
bullying in the same It was just like, Yo, this
(15:01):
girl's I'm my fucking bumper all the time, you.
Speaker 3 (15:04):
Know, right, I just need somebody that's gonna make them shaky,
share a little more shaky in their behavior.
Speaker 2 (15:10):
But not on my bumper in the way where it's
like maybe I could convert it into getting right.
Speaker 3 (15:16):
This isn't flirting. This is just antagonizing.
Speaker 2 (15:19):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, So that's all the girls who wore dickies.
Fuck remember dickies girls. That's like such a specific genre.
Speaker 3 (15:33):
We can't talk about this all day. We got an email.
Speaker 2 (15:37):
Olivia said, pitch, this could be the video episode Fighting
Girls combination. Remember, yeah, man, And this is the end
of it. When he started speaking in that Canadian accent,
that's that's tough, man, and that's we all think you
guys talk funny up there.
Speaker 3 (15:58):
There's so much footage of him being a little d weep,
and they're they're just gonna keep Metro is gonna like
mixing just bad the grassy clip to bad the grassy
clip into everybody's shit. It's gonna go on forever. And
he I just don't know if Drake has a stamina.
(16:19):
I will say this to his credit before we and
we'll move on from this in a second. To his credit,
he has shown more fight than I thought he could
given the circumstances against him.
Speaker 2 (16:35):
I mean, to be to be a rapper, you have
to be able to take a punch. And I do
think even the bad rappers like you gotta because it's
just such a that's just how that shit is, you
know what I mean?
Speaker 3 (16:46):
And I do think, like him or not, Drake is
a great rapper, Like I do think he legitimately like
he's funny and he kind of like is able to
kind of like do bits, you know, even.
Speaker 2 (17:00):
Yeah, when really the only thing is I agree with Kendrick.
The only thing I don't like is the tough talking ship. Really,
I was just like, but everything else he does I fun. Man.
Speaker 3 (17:12):
Yeah, he's a fun guy, and so it's always got a.
Speaker 2 (17:14):
Great summer song, always got a great summer song.
Speaker 3 (17:18):
Dude, Passion Fruit is better than everybody who's ever dissed him,
you know what I mean? Like that song enough is
better than anything anybody else has made.
Speaker 2 (17:28):
Drake gets me on ship that's not even for me,
you know how much I like nice for what, like
for real, Like, I love that song. It's a great song.
It's so good. That has nothing to do with me.
Speaker 3 (17:42):
No, no, in fact, in fact that you're You're part
of the problem in the song.
Speaker 2 (17:47):
I'm the one who wants to him. I'm the one
who's like you.
Speaker 3 (17:54):
He was talking to them, dicky girls when uh, when
you don't. We're calling upon you because we have new merch.
We have very exciting merch that we are now selling
(18:17):
and it's fucking great. We love it so much.
Speaker 2 (18:20):
Just sleek, it's sexy.
Speaker 3 (18:23):
Come on, you want to tell them what we have?
Speaker 2 (18:25):
Yeah, we have three different types of hats, which is
really fun. We have a two tone hat, an alien
dad hat, the traditional logo in black and khaki. Then
we have the enamel pin with an alien who has
a cooofie on it since my mama told me. And
then we have t shirts that say proud little Mama,
which is who you are.
Speaker 3 (18:44):
Yeah, you can buy the merch now, go to my
mama told me dot merch table dot com. It's a
brand new name, but it's the same old merch and
we would love for you to get some if you
haven't got it already. And we want you to have
all the sweet stuff, so get it.
Speaker 4 (19:02):
All right.
Speaker 3 (19:03):
We got an email twenty minutes. Then we got an
email twenty minutes. Then we got an email from a
person named Shelley. Shelley sent us an email and she said, Hi,
David and Langston. I was recently introduced to your podcast
via the socials. I loved the podcast, like legit, fuck
with y'all. Thank you. I'm working my way through the episodes,
(19:23):
and I'm not sure if you guys have already covered this,
so my bad if you did. I'm born and raised
in Baltimore, Maryland, and growing up there there was an
urban legend going around the city about the bunny Man.
It was a man dressed in a bunny suit going
around attacking people with a big ass knife. Had the
kids in my neighborhood shook. I'm not sure if it
(19:45):
was just a black neighborhood thing, but people who I
met at college HBCU from this region also knew about
the bunny Man. Was that a thing in your neighborhoods
growing up? Thanks for sharing your craft best, Shelley, not
at all. Never heard of the bunny man for in
my life.
Speaker 2 (20:00):
I mean, I yeah, it's really interesting. I don't know
if it's a timing thing, because that seems to be
like a more of a seventies eighties thing than a
nineties thing, like this idea of like some mass predator,
you know what I mean, or even like like even
growing up, I didn't hear about it, like even in
(20:21):
the media, like there was no there weren't a lot
of serial killers or anything like that. Does that make
you know what I mean?
Speaker 3 (20:29):
Yeah, I mean, certainly the serial killer part of it,
I will say, And we've talked about it a few
times on the podcast Homie. The clown was a very
real thing for Chicago kids, and that, certainly in the
nineties was still a thing we believed and we're telling
people about and all that shit of like this murderous
(20:49):
man and a clown and a white or a clown
costume and a white van snatching up babies. But I
do take your point that it was more it's certain
felt more like an active threat probably in the seventies
and eighties when serial killers were at their height. Well,
we ain't got serial killers no more.
Speaker 2 (21:09):
I don't know because we I mean, DC was the
last one that I remember that it was like we
as a nation were like you know what I mean, Yeah,
I think we got school shootings now though that's.
Speaker 3 (21:23):
True and that's almost serial killing, but like faster.
Speaker 2 (21:27):
Which do you ever were you? I don't know how
to word this correctly.
Speaker 3 (21:32):
I'm excited either way.
Speaker 2 (21:34):
I was talking to my girl the other day and
I remember I was telling her about how one time,
so I, yeah, I told you, I went to a
sh a bunch of schools. One of the schools I
went to one of the junior high schools. It was
at the bottom of a hill and a high school
was at the top of the hill, like the adjoining
high school or whatever. And they had shot somebody at
(21:56):
the high school. But it wasn't like it wasn't like Colin.
It was just like one guy shot like two guys. Yeah,
and we locked down and all that, Like we couldn't
go home for like an hour after school shit. But
that shit wasn't even on the news. Yeah, but that's poverty, right, yes,
(22:18):
not the but it like we because Colmback was a
very nice school. People don't realize that. It's like it's
like a sports powerhouse. It's a very nice school.
Speaker 3 (22:30):
I went to school down the street from not down
the street, but our neighborhood, Oak Park is adjacent to
a neighborhood called Maywood, and they're not right next to each other,
but they're pretty close to each other. And Maywood is
a predominantly black neighborhood. A lot less money, a lot
obviously less funding for the school. There were shootings all
(22:52):
the time. It PROVIDESO East the high school that was
in Maywood, and that shit was never it's like a
real problem. It was just treated like gang violence and
sort of retaliation whatever they were calling it, instead of
recognizing that, like, yo, there's something fundamentally broken in our system,
(23:12):
whether you even if you do associated with gangs. Why
are we not assessing the the greater sort of like
problem in the fact that this all exists for these
students who have to go to school every single day.
Speaker 2 (23:24):
That's fair because also now that I'm thinking about it,
we only had to stay after like an.
Speaker 3 (23:29):
Hour, just long enough.
Speaker 2 (23:34):
It was like they had like come on the in
they had come on the intercom like a little bit
before last period, and then they let us go to
the buses like yeah, like an hour yeah, probably like
an hour later, yeah, no, which I was pissed. I
remember because that's when Dragon ball Z was on Cartoon Network.
(23:55):
Remember that, Yeah, yeah, that was that was during that
and I was like, but I I also wasn't telling
anybody I was watching it, So it's doing inside.
Speaker 3 (24:03):
It is a crazy thing that we used to have
to be like anime heads in secret, relaxed.
Speaker 2 (24:09):
I watched one show, not a fucking nerd.
Speaker 3 (24:12):
Oh well, I was a fucking nerd, and I couldn't
tell nobody nothing.
Speaker 2 (24:18):
No, it was not cool. Nobody wanted to but dragon
ball Z it was not like nobody couldn't be Like
Goku's been making the spirit bomb for days.
Speaker 3 (24:29):
I listen. I've never been a very big fan of
any of my step parents, and I've had more than most.
Speaker 2 (24:39):
Sometimes you give a peek behind the curtain and it's chilling.
Speaker 3 (24:42):
Listen. My dad's been married three, my mom's been married
for There's a whole lot of these motherfuckers.
Speaker 2 (24:48):
That is a lot. Look at you that you're killing.
Speaker 3 (24:52):
I never liked none of them enough. But but I
will say my mom's second husband used to have like
a bunch of the tapes that he, I guess, had
either recorded or bought on some weird website whatever. But
he had tape dragon Ball Z tapes that I would
like watch, and they had like the whole Freezer arc
(25:14):
all the shit. Man. I used to go crazy watching
that shit. And then once Cartoon Network finally got to Nami, it.
Speaker 2 (25:23):
Was so you were before that.
Speaker 3 (25:25):
Even I've been on anime since I was a boy
boy wow, I mean, not a prete. I was a
boy being like, this is the future of me.
Speaker 2 (25:37):
That's so because I got lucky. I had a friend
in elementary school and he told me about dragon Ball
because dragon Ball used to come on a wz WB
the first dragon Ball like when he was when Goku
was a little boy, and I used to watch that.
And then I just happened to fall in to dragon
Ball Z because I was like, oh, I like that,
(25:59):
but like it didn't go and I had seen Ninja
scrolling didn't like it because I was just like, I
don't want to put a sword in some of these pussy.
I don't think that's cool.
Speaker 3 (26:15):
I'm not sure. I'm not sure how the bunny Man
got us here, and frankly, I'm not sure that matters.
I will say that Olivia sent us a little bit
of information. She said The bunny Man is an urban
legend that originated from two incidents in Fairfax County, Virginia.
So that makes sense. Baltimore, Maryland. You know DMB all
(26:38):
sort of connected in nineteen seventy.
Speaker 2 (26:41):
You were right.
Speaker 3 (26:41):
This is a seventies born sort of conspiracy, but has
been spread throughout the Washington, DC, and Maryland areas. The
legend has many variations, most involved a man wearing a
rabbit costume who attacks people with an axe or hatchet.
So big ass knife. That's just little babies translating. Most
of the stories occur around Colchester Overpass, a Southern Railway
(27:05):
overpass manning Colchester Road near Clifton, Virginia, sometimes referred to
as bunny Man Bridge. This motherfucker got his own bridge.
That makes me feel like that really happened at least once. Yeah, Yeah,
that's there. Really was a bunny Man. He just wasn't
like still out on the loose, right. It is the
(27:30):
scary thing, And if we can sort of connect the
bigger sort of conversation inside of all of this, it
is sort of the scary thing. Of what urban legend
is is that it often is born from at least
some version of a real incident, and so your fears,
your parents' fears, all these people who warn you about
(27:52):
the horrible things that might happen to you, obviously are
sometimes being hyperbolic or extreme in their response. But it's
not because it's impossible. It's just that, like, it's unlikely
ninety nine percent of the time, right I most of
us are not gonna encounter the bunny Man, but somebody
will and that's fucking crazy.
Speaker 2 (28:14):
And that's all it takes for it to spread. I
feel like, in extreme cases of anything, it's just like
it only needs to happen once, you.
Speaker 3 (28:22):
Know, Yeah, you just need one bunny man and now
he can become sort of like this permanent fixture in
our minds forever.
Speaker 2 (28:30):
And it'll always It's it's almost kind of beautiful, isn't
the word. But it's like such an interesting thing about humanity.
How like Lord could like that could just live regionally,
you know what I'm saying. He stabs some drunk guy
left sears after taking pictures all day, stabs some guy
on a bridge, and then we still are talking about
(28:53):
it forty years later, fifty years.
Speaker 3 (28:55):
In a crazy way, it's it's kind of the only
way you really live forever.
Speaker 2 (29:02):
I feel like this is an origin story right now.
Speaker 1 (29:06):
You said.
Speaker 3 (29:11):
I think I found my purpose.
Speaker 2 (29:13):
You just look off into the distance.
Speaker 6 (29:22):
But you know what I'm saying is I do we
spend you and I We've spent our entire lives sort
of like wanting to create legacy through being silly billies
and telling our jokes and shit.
Speaker 3 (29:34):
And the unfortunate reality is that these jokes are temporary,
and that like whatever permanence we have is eventually going
to fade. We can't all remain forever, despite our skill
or hope whatever, our skill being a lot more timely
than murder exactly. But like the murder sort of has
(29:55):
like an evergreen quality to it, especially if you do
it in a in a crazy enough way.
Speaker 2 (30:01):
You're once again venturing back in the order. I'm just saying,
you're speaking about it.
Speaker 3 (30:10):
Look, dog, I'm just saying, Jeffrey Dahmer is gonna last
way longer than Ralph Barbosa, Do you know what I mean?
Like I'm saying, the imprint is far more vast.
Speaker 2 (30:33):
That's my boy, That's that's true. That's true. We will
It doesn't matter how good your drake. This joke was
nobody will remember in probably ten years now.
Speaker 3 (30:47):
But the fuck if you if you fucking chop up
a kid and put him in your freezer, eat him up,
eat him up, eat him up, Everybody's gonna be like, hey,
you know, people be chopping out kids and putting them
in freeze, just like just like length's doing.
Speaker 2 (31:07):
Well. I think we did it.
Speaker 3 (31:08):
I think we did it. I think I think if
we could wrap put a little bow on this bad boy, Shelley.
It sounds like the bunny Man, while probably not an
active threat, you can rest easy, uh, is not completely fabricated.
It probably is rooted in some real experience that somebody
had on a really fucked up overpass in Virginia, and
(31:32):
my best suggestion would be to stay away from said
overpass and overpasses in general. Maybe just concentrate on getting
your ass home and connecting with the people who care
about you so that the bunny Man or a bunny
man like figure does not find you in the future.
You want to tell the people where they can find
you and what cool shit you got?
Speaker 2 (31:52):
Oh yeah, who got jokes eighty seven on Instagram. I
am shooting my own special uh funded producing it myself
is Kyle Birth of a Nation spelled with the G.
There will be some graphics.
Speaker 3 (32:12):
That's funny. That's very funny.
Speaker 2 (32:14):
There will be some graphics forthcoming. But I'm shooting it
in Denver, May eighteenth. I would love for you to
come out and get tickets. If not, it's gonna come
out about a month later. Sign up for my Patreon
Patreon dot com backslash David Bori. All the content is free.
I've given you just little tour stories videos. I gotta
(32:36):
I do front facing Fridays. It's the old thing. The
only thing I will ever charge you for is the
ten dollars for that special. But go online and if
you're in Denver, buy tickets. I would love to see
as many little mamas there as possible, so that once again.
Patreon dot com backslash David Bori and Cool Guy Jokes
eighty seven on Instagram.
Speaker 3 (32:55):
Okay, go see the special.
Speaker 4 (32:58):
Come go fucking go do that. We're almost streat Yeah,
that's fucking beautiful. I'm excited to see it all come
together and uh, as always, you can follow me at
Langston Kerman on on all social media platforms.
Speaker 3 (33:12):
I am. I'm available wherever you want to find me.
Oh and if you if you are in the Los
Angeles area this weekend, we are almost sold out at
the Comedy Store May fifth, David's Birthday, seven pm sharp.
We got to start on fucking time with really.
Speaker 2 (33:31):
Do because they're fucking us.
Speaker 3 (33:33):
We cannot afford to waste a minute, so we are
starting at seven pm sharp. We're excited for you all
to come out as part of the Netflix It's a
Joke comedy festival. And again the tickets are almost sold out,
but we would love for you to be there, So
come on out, come do the thing. And if you
want to send us your own drops, your own conspiracy theories,
if you want to tell us that the individuals you
(33:56):
know to have been personally attacked by the bunny Man,
send it all to my a pod at gmail dot com.
We would love to hear from you. By the merch.
We we hope that the merch is moving and continues
to be Uh. We want to see it live, show
up with fucking hats.
Speaker 2 (34:12):
We'll sign your titties.
Speaker 3 (34:15):
Yeah, we'll sign. We'll sign the merchant. Hey, we'll sign
what's underneath the merchant.
Speaker 2 (34:20):
Have you ever signed a titty before?
Speaker 3 (34:21):
I have two titties so far in my career.
Speaker 2 (34:24):
You know, I want to know one of my proudest stats,
I signed the titty before I ever did stand up comedy.
Speaker 3 (34:30):
Holy ship.
Speaker 2 (34:31):
Yeah, the house party is I was really going for
it for a while. Whoa, Yeah, it's amazing.
Speaker 3 (34:37):
It's amazing that you you didn't peak right there, someone
said I did. Fuck Yeah, that was pretty cool.
Speaker 2 (34:44):
And she kept it on all the whole like I
don't know. I guess she wouldn't have watched off for
titty at the party, but it was.
Speaker 1 (34:49):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (34:50):
I was about to say, that's that part is not
as surprising.
Speaker 2 (34:53):
That's the problem with those disposable cameras though you can't
even find the pictures.
Speaker 3 (34:57):
Ah fuck right.
Speaker 2 (35:00):
Olivia is right. Also, we're gonna sell merch there.
Speaker 3 (35:03):
Yeah, merch merch at the live show. So if you
do not show up with a hat or a T
shirt or a pen, we can fix that. We can
solve that problem right there.
Speaker 2 (35:11):
And it's always cash is king, you know what I'm saying. Yeah,
you bring cash, Maybe we don't have to cut everybody here,
and we give Olivia a little taste, let her weather beak.
Speaker 3 (35:22):
I mean, maybe Will Ferrell doesn't have to see any
any kickback.
Speaker 2 (35:29):
He's doing great. You've all seen.
Speaker 3 (35:33):
He's fine. And and most importantly, if like, subscribe, rate, review,
do whatever you're supposed to do to make this podcast thrive,
that certainly is everything we needed to say. Bye, bitch,
Oh my.
Speaker 2 (35:51):
Gosh, get the cat out of here.
Speaker 1 (35:55):
Oh absolutely not cat, you got to go. Motherfucking mini
ever sew Mini episode Moll the fucking Mini ever sew Well,
the fucking mini episode, Mini episode All the fucking Mini
(36:19):
ever s
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