My brother’s fiancée won't stop messing with my sister… I finally had enough! - r/relationships | Reddit Stories | EP2151 - ok storytime

Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
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Speaker 2 (00:18):
My brother's fiance is bullying my sister. I finally had
enough get him out of there. You can't be a
bully to my family. You heard her, You heard her.
My brother's fiance, to say the least, is not a
very nice person. They've been together for two years, recently
got engaged and seems to be set to get married.
He loves her very much. I don't know why he's

(00:41):
enamored with her, but she really has a cruel, self
absorbed person street by the way, this comes from brothers
getting married, and if you want to submit your own
stories and go to the our slash Okay Storytime supread it. So.
I don't know why, but she seems to direct a
lot of vitriol towards our sister, putting her down on
saying mean things. She always accuses her of being a liar,

(01:04):
being dishonest and superficial and trying to paint her as
a bad person. My sister is very sweet and kind
and the loveliest person I've ever met. I don't like
the way that brother's fiance tries to cast her as
a liar and a bad person. Our brother has done
zilch in trying to stand up for our sister. He
normally just either brushes it aside or takes his fiance's side. Naturally,

(01:27):
this really upsets my sister, and in turn upsets me.
There are a number of issues and mean things in particular,
his fiance has said about our sister. All ist a
few of the main ones that really get to her.
On here, brother's fiance always seems to have this opinion
that our sister is a salute and she sleeps around
a lot and tries to hide it. Our family is Catholic,

(01:49):
though my brother and his fiance are not particularly religious
at all. On the other hand, my sister and I
are quite religious. My sister says that she believes in
waiting till marriage before spacy and claims to be a virgin.
I believe in the same sentiment, and since that's what
she says, is I believe her. I have no reason
to doubt her or think that she's lying. My brother's

(02:11):
fiance seems to never believe this and seems insistent on
the fact that our sister is a liar lying about
being a virgin. She says things like, no way a
girl at the age of twenty three is a virgin
and she went to college. No way she didn't sleep
with of you guys. I know my sister is very
religious and devout, so I have no reason to believe

(02:32):
that she would lie about it or stray, and I
hate the insinuation that she's a liar. It really upsets
my sister because this is the main thing my brother's
fiance is really adamant that she's lying about. I don't
know why. I think maybe because of her own insecurity
or something. It's made my sister cry more than a
few times, and she sometimes insinuates that she's a liar

(02:52):
to her face. She also says things about our sister
like the way she dresses definitely makes her look like
a slut, and always says that her clothes are too
sluty and revealing, et cetera, et cetera.

Speaker 3 (03:05):
She's awful and also your brother is awful for not
putting a stop to this. Yeah, yeah, that's not cool
if they always show too much skin or too much
middrift or cleavage or whatever.

Speaker 2 (03:16):
She says all those things. I think it's absurd because
a person's clothing is no reflection at all on their
spicy related history. True, maybe she just likes to wear
that because she finds it comfortable, or maybe who knows.
I think it's ridiculous to say that just because she
judges her clothing as revealing that she has slept with guys.
But again, literally, why is it any of your business?

Speaker 3 (03:39):
Yea, even whether or not she's slept with anyone, right, Like,
mind your freaking business.

Speaker 2 (03:44):
Absolutely, absolutely. Other times she says things like nobody with
front airbags that bag, it could be a virgin. She's
implying that just because she has large front airbags, she
must sleep around a lot, or she must have gotten
a lot of attention from guys that call, which made
her sleep around. I don't even follow that logic. Once
she even accused her of having fake front airbags and

(04:07):
having had implants, which is effing ridiculous. She says things like,
if you want to wait till marriage, then why are
you always wearing clothes that put your front airbags on display?
She always gets her crap for that and attacks her
for her views and makes her feel extremely self conscious.
So yeah, I think my brother's fiance is a horrible person.

(04:28):
Every time I bring up her behavior with her, she'll
either be like, I have no idea what you're talking about,
I wasn't trying to offend her, or at best, she'll
give a half hearted apology and do the exact same
crap later. My sister has had enough of it. She's
cried more than a few times as a result. And
if there's one thing I can't stand to see is
my sister crying or upsent. What's worst of all is

(04:52):
that our big brother, who's supposed to defend us and
look after us, never brought us to stick up for
his own sister or rebuke his fiance for what she did.
Does he gets angry if we say anything negative about her. Frankly,
my sister and I are really tired of her and
our brother's defense of her. We've already basically made our
best effort to avoid spending time with her, spending any

(05:13):
time with her, but we're also really offended by the
way our brother has acted towards the whole situation. I
really don't want to be in any situation where I
seem accepting of the verbal and emotional abuse my sister
has received. Are we just are we justified in basically
cutting him out of our lives and not going to
the wedding? Or is that too extreme? And is there

(05:34):
a better solution? And there is an UPDATEO, But what
would our solutions be?

Speaker 3 (05:41):
I think you're very valid in not wanting him or
his fiance. Yeah, you know, really around you, because clearly
it you know, it's he may not be saying these things,
but he is letting his fiance say them and therefore
is condoning that behavior.

Speaker 2 (05:56):
Yeah, yeah, no, absolutely absolutely, this is this is the
that's like the one person that would be able to
say anything exactly so.

Speaker 3 (06:05):
And like why would he even want to be with
someone who acted like this?

Speaker 2 (06:09):
Yeah, that's really disappointing.

Speaker 3 (06:10):
Like if I was with a partner who kept, you know,
saying horrible things about my brother, I'd be like, ah bye.

Speaker 2 (06:15):
Yeah, no, absolutely absolutely, But we do have an update.
We have reached a decision. We are going to the wedding,
but from then on, we're going to basically dissociate our
lives from them, especially our future darling sister. I think
that's a good thing. This family event is the wedding,
Like you gotta go to the wedding.

Speaker 3 (06:35):
It's like you had conversations with them, like this is
not just like cutting them off. It's like you try,
You've talked to them, and you've brought up that this
is making you uncomfortable, and your brother and your brother's
fiance doesn't don't care.

Speaker 2 (06:48):
Yeah, yeah, exactly exactly. I've been talking about it with
my sister. Apparently this is an issue she's really felt
sensitive about for a long time. As I mentioned, she's
really religious and modest, so she hates the idea that
she must be a salute because she has big front airbags.
I tried to reassure her. I told her most of
the girls that say that are really just jealous. But

(07:08):
it seems like it was deeper than that. She told
me that even when she was in college, she knew
that she would get a lot of unwanted attention, and
before that, in school, because she developed early, she got
a lot of hate from other girls. Basically, she said,
our future sister in law reminded her exactly of those
girls who used to tease her for them at school
and make her hate her own body. I told her

(07:30):
that she has nothing to hate about her own body.
She has the body that many women would unlive people for.
It's the body God gave her. She's beautiful and amazing
and she should never be ashamed of who she is.
All this time, I thought it was just sister in
law who's the problem, But it seems the problem lies
a lot with my sister's perception of herself, and it's

(07:51):
been long standing. The issues with our brother and what
his fiance has been saying are just bringing all that
up to the surface. I told her, if the problem
is and really with the fiance, then there's no reason
that she can't go to the wedding. So she responded
that she simply doesn't understand the fiance's obsession with belittling her,
accusing her of being a liar, accusing her of being
a salute, and basically shaving her for her front, airbags

(08:14):
and body. I had no idea how to respond. I
hypothesized that maybe the fiance wasn't breastfed as a baby,
and this is her way of taking out her anger.
My sister told me that that comment was weird and
really came out of nowhere. So okay, she was still
pondering whether to go to the wedding or not. I
suggested that maybe she could wear something really revealing that

(08:36):
accentuated her figure, just to mess with the fiance and
mess with everyone. She was like, Nah, that would be petty,
and she didn't want to do anything vindictive to mess
up sister in law's specialty. Plus, that was a really
unsettling comment coming from her little brother asking her to
wear something revealing.

Speaker 3 (08:53):
I didn't know that. I thought they were sisters. I
thought they were sisters too. Oh, he was a man
the all time. Ope, he was a man the all time. Whatever.

Speaker 2 (09:00):
I guess it was a joke, but what so anyway,
I told my sister that we still had plenty of
time to decide. Even if we didn't go, we could
just send in our gifts for the wedding, but we'd
have to explain to our parents our reasoning, and I
figured we should be upfront about that. I told my
sister it was her choice, and whatever her choice was,
I'd be backing her up in it. At that point,

(09:20):
I think she was leaning towards going. But then there
was another pretty bad incident with our brother's fiance. I
spoke to my brother and I tried to have a
heart to heart chat with him. I told him he
probably wasn't as aware as he should be, but some
of the stuff his fiance has said to our sister
has been really bad and hurtful, including some of the insinuations.
I said. However, it wasn't too late to make amends.

(09:43):
A fresh start could still be in the works. He
said he understood, and he'd have a word with her
and tried to talk her into being nicer to our
sister from now on and maybe even an apology. It
was really weird. After that, his fiance came and showed
up at our house one day when it was just
me and my sister and our mother around. She didn't
even have a reason. She just seemed to be dropping

(10:05):
by for the purpose of showing up and was trying
to be nice to everyone. She was being especially forced
nice to my sister. She was like, you know, I
probably haven't said this, but I know you've been a
great help to all of us and setting everything up.
I know you'll absolutely look stunding, when you come to
our wedding and I can't wait to go to yours
as well. It was a really nice and sweet thing

(10:26):
for her to say, and my sister really appreciated it.
They started talking and chatting about other things and seemed
to be really getting along. Our brother then got home
and joined in the mix. He was like, glad to
see you all getting along. And after our brother walked away,
his fiance again stirred up trouble. She told my sister

(10:46):
that some of the things she had said to her
had been taken the wrong way. My sister was very
humble about it and was all like, no, no, not
at all. You know me, I was getting worked up
and overreacting to things. It's not your fault. Fiance was
then like, go and asked her to not wear anything
revealing to the wedding. This is why you shouldn't have
let her off. Dock ah, come on. My sister said, uh,

(11:10):
what do you mean? She said, as she knows she
normally likes to wear revealing clothes and she doesn't judge her,
but it's not appropriate for a wedding. My sister said
sorry and okay, and but then she snapped back and
insisted that she never does wear revealing clothes. Fiance was like, ugh,
not this again, and then went again into complaining about

(11:31):
what she wears and implying she slept with a lot
of guys. She was like, yeah, okay, I believe you
in a sarcastic way. My sister got really angry and
flustered and said to her, I've literally never had spicy
sleep with anyone. And the fiance just flat out and
in a really rude tone, said I don't believe you.

(11:53):
Oh my gosh, if someone's awful to you, yeah, and
then apologizes, don't go oh no. It was nothing like
be like okay, thank you, Yes, thank you was not okay,
but hey, don't I'm glad you recognized that. Yeah, exactly.
You don't even need to be like, oh it's okay,
it's okay. No, just say thank you, Not thank you for.

Speaker 3 (12:11):
The hook for hurting you, say thank you for apologizing
it hurt me. I appreciate that you recognize that.

Speaker 2 (12:18):
Just say thank you. That's it. I told her what
the f was her problem. I said to her face
that she's a terrible person and that she's just coming
into our house and accusing my sister of being a
liar and a salute and that she should get the
f out she's not welcome here anymore. Boo, get her yo.

(12:38):
My sister tried to get me to back down, but
I was pretty angry at that point. My brother came
back at the opportune moment to try to calm everyone down.
His fiance then turned to him and said, do you
think what she's wearing now is a little inappropriate? And
he just said, don't get me involved in this, dude,
You are involved. You are. This is your sister. It's
your sister and your fiance. You dumb dad. Come on,

(13:03):
come on. I told him he should be ashamed not
sticking up for his sister and letting her get insulted
like this. Then his fiance was like to me, oh,
I bet you like the way she dresses. I've seen
you look at her, and how you're always trying to
hug her from the front at every opportunity. You're gross,
no wonder you're defending her. Oh my gosh. Yeah, So I.

Speaker 3 (13:25):
Think, actually, yeah, I think she is actually jealous of
the sister. Yeah, And I think that she has this
weird thing of like, oh my Beyonce or her brother
is like Lee, you know, isn't gonna be interested in
her if she raise these she got this weird like
it with this like totally messed up.

Speaker 2 (13:44):
Dude. Oh man, that's so Exa is crazy. I told
her that she was being obscene and disgusting, and my
brother was just like, Okay, we're leaving. He turned to
me and said, I'm very disappointed in you. I thought
you were more mature than this. My sister was pretty
shocked by the whole encounter and how quickly it escalated.

(14:05):
It was pretty obvious now if it wasn't before that
our brother's fiance hated her for god knows what reason
and would never relent. We both agreed that that was it.
No communication with her, no attendance at the wedding if needed.
Will maintain relations with our brother in the future, but
only if his wife isn't there. Our mother, who had
overheard most of what happened, didn't express much, but she

(14:28):
kind of acknowledged her disdain towards our brother's fiance. When
our dad got back, she explained to him what happened.
They both said that we have every right to hate her,
but that uh, but they would still prefer if we
went along to the wedding as a final gesture, just
for a formality's sake, in front of the extended family.
I told them I'd do whatever my sister did, and

(14:49):
she still hasn't decided. Talked it out with my sister.
She was airing out all her frustrations and hatred towards
our future sister in law. She's much more fierce and
private than in front of other people when she's more modest.
She told me how much she hated that exact type
of person who had body shamed her for having large
front airbags her entire life. No matter what she wears,

(15:11):
if it's a sweater, a dress, or whatever, she's always
the girl with big front airbags. The salute, she actually
started crying a bit and was like, sometimes I wish
I could just cut these things off. I told her
not to do that. Not everyone will hate her for
them or treat her negatively for them. I told her
some guys might even like her more because of them,
and that they may they might make her future husband

(15:33):
very happy. The only worry was that they'll get more
attention than her. She was like, again, that's weird and
slightly disturbing going try and she's trying to help you.
You're the waters branded up. You're like hate that. He's like, no,
Like I think he's a little too comfortable, like you know, dittering,
more comfortable talking about it than like she is.

Speaker 3 (15:55):
It's outs like, well, she sounds like she's pretty modest
and religious, and it's like, dude, like people are gonna love,
you know, like we love big bazangas.

Speaker 2 (16:03):
And she's like whoa. She's like, we can't talk about this.
She's just valid, but he's just trying to help feel
well intentioned. Yeah, but we just laughed about it. She
told me how she was utterly disappointed with how our
brother had acted. She told me that I was her
favorite brother by far. Easy yeah not on hie bar
my favorite brother too, and I'd always been her favorite.

(16:26):
I can't actually express in words how good that felt
to hear. It's not like I can tell my parents that,
but I can tell you guys, it felt absolutely effing
awesome to hear her say that I'm number one to her.
But anyway, moving on about the wedding, she still hasn't
decided if she's going or not. She was contemplating going
just as a formality, but she thought that her presence

(16:48):
there would be a victory for our brother's fiance, and
she might even use the opportunity to humiliate her or
operate her in one of her cruel ways. I told
her maybe if I could get a promise out of
her that she wouldn't or an apology, would she then come,
And she said yes. So I said, I'd talked to
our brother about it one last time, and you know

(17:08):
what I'm gonna talk to you about one last time.
Just kidding, I'm lying. We're gonna bring it up so
many more times than this. The fact that you can
check out full episodes of more stories just like this one.
Just go to Apple Podcast, Spotify, iHeartRadio, just search Okay,
story time and we'll be right there for you, right there,
right there for you. But there is a little bit
more into the story. But we have any funnal comments

(17:30):
before we.

Speaker 3 (17:31):
Your brothers, your brother's fiance sicks. You guys got each other,
stick with each other, defend each other, and know that
you know people are gonna make awful comments about your
sister's body, and like yeah, or your sister should know
this and it's because they're jealous and they're hateful, and
there's this awful purity culture that runs in a lot

(17:52):
of areas of our society, especially religious ones. But also
like for religious people, know that, like your whole doctrine
is that God made your body perfectly right, So right,
there is nothing inherently sexual about a body.

Speaker 2 (18:08):
Yeah, yeah, and you know your past, you know your
own modesty and your actions and everything like that, so
you don't have to prove anything to anyone. Yeah, yeah, exactly.
But there is a little bit more. I told him again,
our sister's feelings were really badly hurt, and a genuine
apology from his fiance for everything would go a long

(18:29):
way and mending our sister's hurt feeling. He said he'd
see what he could do, but next I spoke to him,
he said that it's not happening. However, again, we spoke
to our parents and they said that they would really
appreciate if we did go, and we wouldn't have to
speak to the bride or groom at all. We can
just stay seated at our table for most of the
night if we wanted to. My sister agreed to that,

(18:51):
so we made the decision that we would go, but
we would avoid the bride and groom the entire night,
and after that probably try to see as little of
them as possible, not as the end of that story. Wow. Yeah, man,
I think I think that they need an apology from
the brother, absolutely, like absolutely, he is as much he
is as culpable in this situation as as this yeah

(19:12):
is yeah, like this this isn't just like oh, the
brother needs to get the fiance. No, no, no, no, they
need to do that. Yeah, but like also the brother
I agreed. And then if they do go to the wedding,
I think the sister should go in a suit, and
then Opie should go in a very low cut dress. Yes,
And then be like yes and be like, I don't
know what you're talking about? What are you talking about?

Speaker 1 (19:33):
I don't know what?

Speaker 2 (19:34):
Wait? Whereas nothing wrong? This is what I normally wear? Yeah, yeah,
what you want to talk about? How it's revealing? Huh?

Speaker 3 (19:42):
My husband left us while on a family vacation, so
I filed for divorce.

Speaker 2 (19:47):
Well yeah, that seems like the next move really. Yeah.

Speaker 3 (19:51):
I am a forties wife slash mom, married over ten
years and together fifteen years with husband two kids, under ten.
We both work relatively demanding jobs outside the home. Our
families live eight plus hours drives or two to four
hour flights away. By the way, this comes from deleted
and if you want to spend your own stories, go
to our slash Okay storytime separate it So late last year,

(20:14):
I planned a trip to see several longtime friends in
a shared rented house over New Year's We have taken
this trip as a family before. I gave my husband
the option to not join us, but he said he
wanted to come. I handled all the logistics and financial aspects,
including booking and obtaining a rental car, scheduling boarding for

(20:35):
the family pet, doing laundry and packing items for myself
and the kids, paying our family's share of the rental house,
and coordinating and communicating with friends we planned to visit.
I also did all the driving on the five hundred
plus mile trip, as my husband dislikes driving, let their
license expire and has made no efforts to renew it.

Speaker 2 (20:54):
Yeah, what, He's just like, I don't like it. Oh
my god, I just like you have kids, Like I
can't drive all the time. He's like, eh, but I
don't like it. It's icky to me.

Speaker 3 (21:05):
On the day of the trip, I was up before
dawn to finish getting things together, while my husband slept
until eight to nine am.

Speaker 2 (21:13):
There were many.

Speaker 3 (21:14):
Tasks to handle before we could leave. Finish laundry and packing,
take out trash, load the car with the luggage and snacks,
make breakfast for the kids, and clean the kitchen, turn
off Christmas lights, get the pet into its carrier, etc.
Before we could hit the road. Once my husband was awake,
he handled his packing and contributed to family breakfast before

(21:35):
sitting back.

Speaker 2 (21:37):
Well.

Speaker 3 (21:37):
I ran around getting things done. I asked him to
handle a few things, which he did reluctantly and with exasperation,
before heading out.

Speaker 2 (21:44):
To take a walk. Oh god.

Speaker 3 (21:46):
We finally got on the road for what became a
torturous drive. The normally eight to nine hour drive ended
up being thirteen hours due to traffic. It would have
been a difficult journey to split between two drivers. Is
even worse because all the driving was on me. I
forgot okay again, Okay.

Speaker 2 (22:05):
He doesn't want to he doesn't like driving. Not cool, cool, baby,
your wife, Come on.

Speaker 3 (22:12):
It was so awful that I booked one way flights home.
It would be easy to return the rental car to
the airport and take a short flight home versus driving
the rental car back. The pain of the punishing road
trip faded once our week long trip with friends got underway.
I thoroughly enjoyed seeing people I normally do not see,
and felt at ease with pretty much everyone except my partner.

(22:36):
While these friends are also my partner's friends of ten
to twenty years and have been with us for life milestones,
he sulked and acted antisocial towards me and others who
he has been friendly with on previous occasions. He expressed
on the on the drive down that he would need
to do some work while we were on vacation and
brought his laptop. I did not foresee this being an

(22:57):
issue because many others we were with also remote work,
including a physician friend doing patient televisits, a creative friend
working on a screenplay over zoom, and a scientist calling
in for meetings. A few days into the vacation, I
received an email from the airline i'd booked flights with,
stating there had been a change to the itinerary.

Speaker 2 (23:17):
It appeared the.

Speaker 3 (23:18):
Flights had been changed to leave three days earlier. Than
schedule and from a different airport. I opened the email
as I was sitting on a couch facing two friends
on an opposite couch, and my husband was about twenty
feet behind them on the other side of the room.
I made a remark about it, thinking there was a
glitch of some sort, and my husband said, oh, I
did that that being changed his flight and his flight

(23:41):
only to leave from the closest airport midway through the
week to return home alone.

Speaker 2 (23:45):
What it's wait, it's even crazier.

Speaker 1 (23:47):
Yikes, yikes.

Speaker 3 (23:49):
I was blindsided, and it showed to the point that
the couple facing me looked at me incredulously and mouthed WTF.
I was in shock that he would make a unilateral
decision to leave the kids and me midweek without telling
me or making an effort to discuss with me first.
I replied thanks for telling me to my husband and

(24:10):
asked why. He basically said he was leaving to return
home for work because he felt the house's internet connection
wouldn't be sufficient for his work needs. I excuse myself
and immediately called my sister, who's also my best friend,
to debrief. She validated that his actions were not appropriate,
as did the friends who witnessed the interaction. As news

(24:30):
spread throughout the house, our mutual friends also expressed his
belief or the situation. I didn't feel like I could
confront my husband about it because even simple conversations between
us can go sideways.

Speaker 2 (24:43):
Boy.

Speaker 3 (24:44):
Pause, you need to confront your husband about it? Yeah,
before he leaves.

Speaker 2 (24:49):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (24:50):
It's like, if you cannot communicate, you either have to
go to therapy and figure that out right or the
relationship cannot continue. But either way, god to have a conversation. Historically,
he is passive and offers minimal responses okay, sounds good,
or escalates the issue to eleven and shows rage in
his eyes and body language. He has never been physically

(25:11):
violent with me, but the unpredictability of his rage response
has left me feeling like I'm walking on eggshells when
I need to raise an issue. Relationship cannot work like this.
It can't if this is how he Yeah, if this
is how he is approaching it, it cannot work like this.

Speaker 2 (25:25):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (25:26):
A few hours passed and he brought our kids into
the house in wet swimsuits. When I finished getting them
showered and changed, he appeared in the room we were
sharing for a moment. As he was walking out, I
approached him with the wet swimsuits and said, assertively and
somewhat heatedly, can you please take these outside?

Speaker 2 (25:45):
He responded, you could ask me that nicely. I clat back.
You could have told me you were leaving early. I'm done.

Speaker 3 (25:51):
We didn't speak after that, though my older child came
to me to tell me they knew he was leaving.
This hit me on a deep level because I am
a child of divorced parents who used me to deliver
information to each other. I found it beyond aft up
that my husband would talk to a school age child
about his plans but not their mom slash his wife. Yes, absolutely,

(26:15):
but also you are doing a somewhat similar thing with
everyone else in the house.

Speaker 2 (26:21):
You're not talking to him about it. It's a good point.

Speaker 3 (26:23):
Like again, like totally more messed up to talk to
your kids about it. Sure, but you're both just not
talking to each other, even though there were plenty of
kids around. I took our kids to my family's house
for New Years for New Year's Eve so that we
could stay up late and be carefree with friends. I
distanced myself for my husband, who got really wasted and
acted like he had undergone a personality transplant. I was

(26:45):
told he took mushrooms. He left the next day with
a simple goodbye and didn't bother to tell him. Many
others in the house he was on his way out,
including one of his best friends from college, dude. The
kids and I were fine for the remainder of the trip.
I am used to handling things anyway. However, those who
remained and are close to me were disgusted by my

(27:07):
husband's behavior and stated that he was selfish at minimum
or a self absorbed person. Worst case scenario disclosures in
side notes. I struggle with ADHD and I'm often overwhelmed.
He often expresses nonverbal annoyance and exasperation towards me, but
does not verbally communicate it. There is a lot of tension,
and our relationship hasn't been in a good place for

(27:29):
many years now. We are more like roommates who co
parent and no longer.

Speaker 2 (27:33):
Sleep in the same room.

Speaker 3 (27:34):
Our marriage lacks physical and emotional intimacy, and I have
long wondered if he's cheating, which he denies, or attracted
the same gender redriving. We live in a large city
and he gets around using mass transit and Uber. It's
a point of contention between us because all the driving
for kids slash family activities falls on me when something
happens outside of a transit Uber convenient area. The imbalance

(27:58):
has also been felt when I have need to seek
medical care.

Speaker 2 (28:01):
Oh, great point. You don't have anyone who could drive
me home. That's true.

Speaker 3 (28:05):
I drove myself to the hospital in labor, Oh my god,
and had to recruit a relative to fly in and
help me because he couldn't be the one to transport
me when I needed surgery last year.

Speaker 2 (28:16):
Someone's gonna fly in because you just don't like driving.
That's crazy.

Speaker 3 (28:20):
You can't rely on this partner. No, we often do
not see ey to die am many matters. He can
be rigid and immature and seems to lack empathy. Communication
is a major problem in our relationship. Last year I
asked him to begin couple's therapy and we had a
handful of sessions with a Gattman therapists that were not productive.
The main takeaways were that my husband's stone walls and

(28:43):
shows contempt and criticism while I exhibit defensiveness. The New
Year's event came on the heels of me having a
lumpeg to me late last year. He was not supportive
and barely asked me how I was feeling or how
he could support me as I went through months of
diagnostics it's to determine if I had breast cancer. Ultimately,
the surgically removed tissue was benign.

Speaker 2 (29:05):
Good.

Speaker 3 (29:06):
My coworker's, immediate family and close friends were there for me,
but it's stung that he was so absent and uncaring
as I faced a possible answer diagnosis. I called him
out on it during our final session with our previous
couple's therapist, and he said that he didn't ask about
it because you thought the information I provided and was
too political.

Speaker 2 (29:26):
Huh, what does that even mean?

Speaker 3 (29:28):
He's like, you used too many big words, so I
don't want to hear about it.

Speaker 2 (29:34):
I didn't know. I'm not a doctor. I don't understand
all your fancy lingo. Like what that's just so mind
boggling to me weird At the time, he did not
apologize when I called him out on a trend of
him not stepping up for me when I needed support,
and instead issued his standard not apology, sorr, you feel

(29:55):
the way we are starting discernment therapy this week.

Speaker 3 (29:58):
I have remained in this Marria mariage mostly to avoid
breaking up family, but it feels like there is no
coming back from this. He seems to have no idea
that I'm considering separation or divorce, and I haven't said
anything to him because I'm afraid of how he will respond.
I have a therapist who is aware of all of
this and is tremendously supportive, but wants to reach out

(30:19):
to others to see if anyone has experienced similar issues
in how they handled it, any words of wisdom, And
I have some words of wisdom for you, guys, and
that is that you can listen to full episodes of
stories just like this. Just go to Spotify, Apple Podcasts,
or iHeartRadio and search up Okay story time.

Speaker 2 (30:36):
Oh yeah, so smart, Oh yeah, so wise wise, But
there is a final update to the story. Do you
have any final thought? Well, I've never been in this situation. No,
I don't know. If kids don't have a husband, that's true,
So I unfortunately cannot contribute in that way. But I
support you in the idea of divorcing.

Speaker 3 (30:59):
You know, it seems like kind of shockingly op he
hasn't really brought that up in like a real way.

Speaker 2 (31:07):
Yeah, I guess I'm kind of just going based off
of the title.

Speaker 3 (31:10):
But it seems like OPI has yet to actually say
I want a divorce, But it does seem right now,
you're not able to have a conversation with him. He's
not willing to listen even if you were you went
to therapy. I think you have to sit down and say, like,
right now, the way that we're going it isn't working.

(31:30):
Like you're not communicating with me when you want to
leave a trip, when you want to change plan a
huge thing, huge thing. I feel like you're like, right now,
I feel overwhelmed with how much responsibility is being put
on me with the kids because I'm the only driver,
and just kind of focusing on the things that you're
feeling like, I'm feeling overwhelmed, I'm feeling unheard.

Speaker 2 (31:53):
I good old eye statements, Yeah exactly.

Speaker 3 (31:57):
And if he responds to that with like anger or aggression,
then it's then it. You know, it's such shows shows
you what what you need to do. But yeah, don't
go into that conversation with aggression. We met with a
couple's therapists and I shared these concerns. He accused me
of character assassination and smearing him when I recounted those events,

(32:18):
how they made me feel, how they were perceived by
our friends. We're getting divorced. Thanks to everyone for your
objective feedback. You collectively galvanize me to move in this
difficult but necessary direction.

Speaker 2 (32:31):
Well, there you go, the end of that story. There
you go. But they are going to get divorced.

Speaker 3 (32:36):
Yeah, which I mean honestly makes sense with how much
the communication I've broken down.

Speaker 2 (32:42):
It's not much of a like relationship at this point now,
just just kind of existing next to each other.

Speaker 3 (32:48):
For everyone you know who may be in a similar
situation where the communication is not working, you still have
to have a conversation about that. And you know, if
you need a to mediate like you, you want to
be communicating as much and as early as possible. So yeah,
make sure, like notice pick up on those signs of

(33:11):
how people respond to criticism, of how people respond to
you talking about your feelings, talking about if you're overwhelmed,
you know, right, because those Yeah, this could be indicators
of how they will respond in a marriage.

Speaker 2 (33:25):
When you have kids. Yeah, absolutely, Hey.

Speaker 1 (33:29):
It's John, your og host. Here. We're gonna get back
to the stories, but here's a quick three minute break
of ass from our sponsors. My husband's ex stepmother stole
his inheritance, so we cut her off.

Speaker 2 (33:39):
Cut her off, I say.

Speaker 1 (33:42):
Former stepmother in law, because her outrageous and horrible behavior
made her passed away to us, and at present time
I have no idea how or where she is. Also, sadly,
my husband will call him Jay also passed away at
a much too young of an age. Oh wow, very sorry,
and he passed away about a year and a half ago.
But I am blessed that we had more than twenty

(34:04):
five wonderful years together. And I also have our two
beautiful children who both look a lot like him. By
the way, this comes from mother of Peacock's And if
you want to submit your own stories, send them to
the r slash Okay story time suburn it. So to preface,
Jay lost his birth mom to a tragic car accident
when he was only seven years old. His dad, whom
my husband idolized, was absolutely devastated, but did his best

(34:27):
to raise his two young children, Jay and his older
sister on his own. His dad's job eventually relocated them
to another state, Cali four Naya to be precise. Welcome,
Welcome the state of US.

Speaker 2 (34:40):
Oh yeah.

Speaker 1 (34:41):
Several years later, his dad met the lady who would
become his wife and Jay's stepmom. We'll call her Looney,
like her and here we go. When Jay was a
freshman in high school, Looney got pregnant and brought Jay's
half sister, we'll call her Lunette, into the world. This
becomes very important later. Flash forward many years. Jay and
I meet, fall in love, moving together. A few years later,

(35:02):
he proposes to me on my birthday, making it the
best birthday of my life.

Speaker 2 (35:07):
Wow.

Speaker 1 (35:09):
My entire family was present for the proposal, but his
parents and Lunette had moved to Texas after Jake graduated
high school. We had visited them a few times, so
I didn't know them. That evening we called his parents
to announce our engagement. After we shared our joyous news,
his dad told us that they were literally just about
to call us to share their own news. He had
been diagnosed with stage four liver.

Speaker 3 (35:29):
Oh.

Speaker 1 (35:30):
Wow, that's the bad. Yeah, this was a definitely good
news bad news kind of thing.

Speaker 2 (35:35):
Yeah. I want to say I'm glad that the good
news came first. Yeah, but it's just a hard situation anyway. Yeah,
Oh my gosh, it was surreal.

Speaker 1 (35:45):
At that time they just found out about so did
not have a prognosis or even a treatment plan from
his doctors, So we did not know if we had
a time limit or not. As terrible as that sounds,
Jay's dad told us to move forward with our wedding plans.
He would not let get in his way of being.
A couple of months later, we went and visited them,
and his dad's outlook was pretty good. He appeared to
be doing well and was responding well to chemotherapy. Good,

(36:07):
but being pragmatic, his dad also planned for the worst
and had updated his will. Mind you, he had a
very good job with a major company and had invested
very wisely. So with investments and his insurance policy, he
had more than three million dollars in assets. Whoa a
right good for you man. During the visit, Jay and

(36:29):
his dad talked privately about the changes to his will
in detail. Due to various tax laws in our retrospective states,
his dad had carefully structured the various payouts to have
the least impact from taxes as possible. Also very smart.

Speaker 2 (36:41):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (36:42):
Defice it to say that the plan was for Jay
and his older sister to each receive around six hundred
thousand dollars. He paid out in annuities of thirty K
a year, and the rest would be going to Looney
and Lunette, with various contingencies being placed on the money
for Lunette until she was eighteen. She was thirteen at
this time. To note that Looney did not know about
this conversation. Sadly, Jay's dad took a serious turn for

(37:05):
the worse a couple of months after our visit, and
we were suddenly being told that we needed to come
visit as soon as possible and prepare to say our goodbyes.

Speaker 2 (37:13):
Wow, that's hard.

Speaker 1 (37:15):
We immediately flew out, and within days his dad had passed.
The funeral took place back east where Jay's dad's family was,
and this was the first real evidence of Looney's craziness
aka the name started to earn that Daffy Duck comes out.
Yeah yeah, Jay and I could not attend, but found
out much later from other family members what a debacle

(37:36):
Looney made of it, and the spectacle she made of herself.
In less than a month Since Jay's dad had passed,
Looney had quit her job and gone in an insane
spending spree, buying a brand new house, a new convertible Camaro,
new wardrobes for herself and for a lunette, and was
apparently flashing cash and madly throwing money around during her
visit back east for the funeral.

Speaker 2 (37:57):
Wow, bad habits.

Speaker 1 (37:59):
Yeah, maybe you know. Losing a loved one does make
you do crazy things. It does make your brain process
things a lot at once. I get it, But this
is not the way to process that.

Speaker 2 (38:13):
Yeah, retail therapy is definitely not as good as actual therapy.

Speaker 1 (38:19):
She made a mockery of the memorial service where instead
of respectively spreading the ashes at the lake where Jay
and his dad grew up, she skipped around the adjacent
golf course, carelessly tossing the ashes around while the rest
of the family looked on in horror. Oh wow, Yeah,
I think losing Jay's dad or losing her husband did
make her go a little looney. Looney has been named

(38:41):
as an executor of the will and of the first
thirty thousand dollars annuinity that Jay and his older sister
were supposed to receive. They each only got ten thousand
dollars each. When asked, she claimed that it was what
the will said. Jay initially gave her the benefit of
the doubt that she would make good on the rest
before the year was out and use the money to
buy a new motors cycle that he had been wanting.

(39:01):
Note that we had only one car at this time.
By this time, our wedding date had been set for
about six months later, in plans had been well under
way taking up majority of Jay's in my own spare time.
We eventually heard about the funeral and spending spree, and
after Jay's brand new motorcycles vandalized it subsequently totaled. He
exploded at Looney, telling her that he knew the truth

(39:23):
of the will and that she owed him the remaining
twenty thousand dollars or she and Lunette were not welcome
to come to the wedding, let alone be a part
of it. It was pretty much radio silence from them
after that until the wedding. Two days before the wedding,
Looney and Lunette showed up at our apartment, Loody driving
her new convertible Camaro along with a driver that she
paid to transport the new Camaro that she said she

(39:46):
bought for Jay as a wedding gift. Jay was shocked
but grateful. Thankfully, the wedding was incredible and everything we
had hoped it would be, with one minor instance, Looney
recovering every drinker got stinking waste, did at the reception,
making a big scene, started blubbering about how Jay's dad
should have been there and had to be escorted out

(40:06):
and driven to her hotel. I need to point out
that no one had ever seen her shedded tear about
Jay's dad at the funeral or otherwise. Our interactions with
Looney and Lunette were cordial but minimal after that, until
Jay asked Looney for some of his belongings that had
been packed and moved with her and his dad when
they moved to Texas, as well as some of his
dad's things that he valued and hoped to keep. There
were a couple of very specific boxes that contained Jay's

(40:28):
high school memorabilia and other keepsakes and albums, but Jay
had been in and out of apartments, so he asked
his parents to hang on to them until there was
more time and he was more staple. Looney told him
that she didn't know where his boxes were and that
she would look into it as well as his dad's items.
We didn't hear a pee from either Loonie or Lynette
for the next three years. Jay and his older sister

(40:49):
never saw another annuinity. We had since moved from our
apartment into a house with our new baby boy, Congratulations,
who was about ten months old. When Jay went to
leave work to pick up our son from daycare, only
we defined his car was missing. His car had our
only car seat in it, and he panicked. He called
the police, and long story short, found out that Looney
had hired someone to repoe it or repossess it. Unfortunately,

(41:11):
to avoid having to have his supercharged Camaro altered for
California missions, Jay hadn't never transferred the title from Looney
to himself to on paper, the car still belonged to Looney.

Speaker 2 (41:21):
You can't trust the word out of this woman's mouth.

Speaker 1 (41:24):
Also, I would try to find a copy of that will. Oh, yes,
she's an executor of the will, so she may have
changed it.

Speaker 2 (41:32):
Uh, how's that allowed? I don't know, change the will.

Speaker 1 (41:36):
I don't know, I don't know. Yeah, he should have
had a copy of the will if when he knew
his dad was passing. That's one of the things I
about wills. It sucks. The police managed to get her
on the phone. She went to answer Jay's calls and
over her insane shrieking that it was her car and
she had the right to take it back. They calmly
explained that while that may not be the case, the
property inside it did not belong to her, and she

(41:57):
had twelve hours to return our property or we would
press charges. I managed to borrow a car seat from
a coworker and picked up Jay and our son. When
we arrived home, we found our car seat and all
our other belongings sitting in the driveway, with signs that
someone had attempted to enter the house. Doing the math,
we realized that Lunette was now sixteen. Later that year,
we found out from Jay's older sister that luniy Lynette

(42:19):
had squandered all three million dollars, including the seven hundred
and fifty thousand dollars that had been put into our
trust for Lunette until she turned eighteen.

Speaker 2 (42:28):
Wow, that's a lot of money.

Speaker 1 (42:30):
What are we doing here?

Speaker 2 (42:31):
What are we doing here?

Speaker 1 (42:32):
Loony looney? Did in fact take the Camaro back because
she had no money left to buy Lunette a car,
and she felt entitled to and justified in taking Jay's.
We also found out that Looney had pawned the items
that Jay had wanted that belonged to his dad, and
had burned Jay's keepsakes in retribution, burned them his high
school things like that he was looking for. He's like, hey, dude,

(42:53):
if someone doesn't tell you, you know, when you ask
him something really nice, like hey, some of my boxes
are still at home. Yeah. If they don't responding like
a month, that's one thing. If they don't respond three
years about it, yeah, I would just go and check.

Speaker 2 (43:05):
Right, Just go get him yourself.

Speaker 1 (43:07):
Hey, pay them a visit, right, Yeah.

Speaker 2 (43:09):
Before they burn your kids into the sky.

Speaker 1 (43:12):
That's crazy. In the end, Jay only had a few
pictures of his dad and other small things like his
dad's watch that we got from him the last time
we visited. He was to say. We went no contact
with them after that, but didn't formally block them from anything.
We just ceased contact and never heard anything from them.
By the way, you can hear from us by listening
to full episodes every day with stories just like this.

(43:35):
Just go to Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you go
and get your favorite podcast app and search. Okay, storytime,
we have a little bit left to this story. But Angie,
it seems like we're aready going no contact. Yeah, which
is great, but great idea.

Speaker 2 (43:50):
I'm very glad that they're going no contact.

Speaker 1 (43:53):
I would like to see like the will itself or
because that money belongs to you, right and she can't
keep it all to herself. I know she probably. I
don't know the lealities of wills and how it works.

Speaker 2 (44:06):
I don't know either.

Speaker 1 (44:07):
Unfortunately, I'm not a well knowledged man.

Speaker 2 (44:12):
On wills, not a lawyer, will myself personally.

Speaker 1 (44:17):
Yeah, let us know, Like, if you're the executor of
the will, does that mean you can literally change everything
about the will? I don't know. But if there was
a verbal agreement that, hey, someone said you can do this,
I don't know how it works. So let's know in
the comments what you can and cannot do. But Looney
is straight off the looney bin right.

Speaker 2 (44:38):
Here, absolutely very well named this one.

Speaker 1 (44:41):
This is the first time I heard like a looney,
which is a really good nickname for characters here. I
don't think Lunette is that fault here. You can't really
call her Lunette. I know she's a daughter of movie,
but Lunette seems like she's just a sixteen year old girl.
That's just like, what do I do?

Speaker 2 (44:57):
Yeah? I don't know if she's done anything, and I.

Speaker 1 (45:00):
Don't think he has done anything wrong. Yeah, so it's
all on the mom here. On looney, let's finish the
story until about three years after the Kamaro incident, Jay
gets a message from Lunette telling him that she's getting
married and she wants him to walk her down the aisle.
Jay was aghast and proceeded to tell her all the
reasons why there was no effing way he would ever

(45:21):
dean to honor such a request from her after everything
that she and her mom put him flush us through.
Lunette sends him a viittrioltic reply, telling him what a
horrible person he is and that her mom is right
that he deserved everything he got, then instantly blocked him,
But she didn't block me at first. I sent her
one final text setting the record straight, and that was

(45:41):
the last we ever heard from them.

Speaker 2 (45:44):
WHOA, that's it?

Speaker 1 (45:46):
WHOA that was it? Hey, it's Sam, your ogi host here,
bring it back to the stories. But here's three minutes
fads from our.

Speaker 2 (45:52):
Sponsored I took in my fiance's mother. Now she competes
with me.

Speaker 1 (45:57):
Ooh, you gotta have a gauntlet, you know, like I
was like, who makes the best dishes? You can like
just do the coolest like backflip, yep, and you know winner.
Take all.

Speaker 2 (46:06):
Trigger warning there is mentions of parential abuse in this story,
so if you might get triggered by that, please carry
on to another story or episode. The players Me twenty
two female, Beyonce, Eddie twenty five male, mother in law
Dana fifty five female sister in law one, Sharon twenty
three female sister in law two, Carrie twenty one female

(46:28):
and father in law Eli deceased. And then finally Bob
thirty five male, our friend and tenant. Everyone write that
down and take some notes. I just remember Bob. Yeah,
we got Bob, Bob, Me, Eddie, Dana, Sharon, Carrie, Eli,
and Bob. All right, you will refer back just like
a map in the beginning of a fantasy series.

Speaker 1 (46:49):
All right, I know, Bob. That's it, by the.

Speaker 2 (46:51):
Way, that comes from deleted And if you want to
submit your own stories, just go to the ur slash Okay,
storytime separated it so long, story short. I come from
a very harmful background. I went no contact with my
parents last year. My now fiance, Eddie, opened my eyes
to the traumatics and helped me escape them. I was
diagnosed with bipolar disorder earlier this year and am in therapy.
I take antidepressants and am working on getting disability. Before

(47:14):
I went no contact, I inherited a decent amount of
money from a grandparent, which I spent on a nice
house in another city away from my family. Other than
my younger sister, who is still a minor, my family
is not involved in my life. I met Eddie in
college and have been with him for three years. We
plan on eloping later this year. Eddie always had a
strained relationship with his family, especially his sister Sharon, but

(47:36):
I never really understood why Sharon hated me upon meeting
me due to a bad first impression, and despite living
on the other side of the country and only meeting
me three times, she obsessively trashes me whenever my name
is brought up. Carry and I got along well enough
until we had a falling out and she accused me
of my fiance into submission because he took my side.

(47:58):
I realized a lot of our relationship was us doing
things for her and her using and insulting us. So
I cut her out of my life, get her out
of there, big old cuts. Both of his sisters are
self absorbed people, and we want no contact with either
of them. Eddie's father, Eli passed away this year. His
family had always been poor, and his mother, Dana, was

(48:19):
left in a lot of debt. I gave her five
thousand dollars to help her with the funeral in her debts,
and invited her to move in with us when our
house was foreclosed, since neither of his sisters was willing
to take her in. Dana seemed nice enough. We had
a lot of things in common on the surface, and
I figured we'd get along fine. I continued to financially
support her, took her to events, took her on our dates,
bought her dinner, and bought her various gifts. I spent

(48:42):
a lot of my time with her trying to build
a relationship. I noticed that there always seemed to be
a large distance between Dana and Eddie, But when I
questioned her she wouldn't admit to anything. Then I started
noticing her behavior. When Eddie and I went out on
a date alone, she would get huffy and short with
me afterwards. She would bring her rowdy friends over every
so often when I would sleep in on Sunday, and

(49:03):
she expected me to run to buy them food, like
be a servant for this woman. Come on.

Speaker 1 (49:08):
She got compliant like dan, oh, this is my life now.

Speaker 2 (49:12):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (49:13):
He op, he's my little mate.

Speaker 2 (49:15):
No, no, no. She never seemed to believe the stories
about my even though both my fiance and sister corroborated them.
When we did anything together, she would obsessively try to
beat me, sometimes grinding in games for days on end,
only to bragg to me she had to be the
best at everything. Whenever I messed up, she would snipe
at me and criticize me behind my back to Eddie,

(49:37):
who told me everything. When Eddie paid more attention to
me than her, she would get upset and act catty
towards me. She's literally like a regular user. She needs
a constant supply of attention or she goes into withdrawal
and gets petty. We each have two cats, and she
would obsessively try to get me my cats to like
her better and get jealous if her cats approached me.

(49:58):
She would always sit at the head of the tabe
and sit me furthest away with Eddie in the middle.
Whenever I asked her to clean or do anything, she
would either refuse or get hostile with me. She complained
about everything I did, from cooking to cleaning to my personality.
At one point I ended up in the hospital due
to my bipolar disorder. We asked her not to tell
anyone now. Dana has a very unhealthy relationship with Sharon.

(50:21):
She literally lives vicariously through her. Of course, Eddie overheard
her telling Sharon about it. She even put the phone
speaker on when we were all in the living room
and allowed Sharon to trash me over the phone. Sharon
is obsessed with having the first grandchild. I am child free,
and one time Dana kept telling her you will give
me my first grandchild while she was witching about me.

(50:42):
When I confronted her about it later, she told me
that Sharon just tells it like it is. Dana pretty
much requires me to drive her everywhere since she just
doesn't like driving. However, she's willing to drive thirty miles
away to go see her friends, yet she won't drive
two miles to get me my medicine when I'm not
able to drive. Additionally, due to Eddie wrecking my car
earlier this year, as well as my furnace not working anymore,

(51:06):
I ended up running out of money and and working
on getting disability. Despite my supporting her for several months
and her still owing me several thousand, Danny complains that
I am an irresponsible leech. I barely ask her for
anything other than a minimal amount of food, and she
still complains, all right, come on, nothing is good enough

(51:27):
for this one.

Speaker 1 (51:28):
Yeah, so nothing will please you and everything you do
is right? Yeah? Cool, cool, great cool.

Speaker 2 (51:35):
She refused to pay me back most of the money,
stating that she was saving up for bankruptcy. She has
gotten close and yet blown her bankruptcy fund several times
on stuff like grilling supplies and a trip out of state.
Yet I'm the bad guy for asking for fifty bucks
a month when she still owes me for grand All.

Speaker 1 (51:54):
Right, this is where we go and talk to your husband. Yes, so, mom,
what's going on?

Speaker 2 (52:01):
You gotta step in, guy, You gotta start sending boundaries
with this woman because I can't. Yeah, she has started
paying me as of two months ago, but she complains
about it constantly. Probably the biggest reason I have a
problem is that Dana is flat out neglectful to her cat.
Their litter box is always dirty, and she rarely changes
their food and water. She doesn't bother to clean their

(52:23):
pee and throw up off the floor, especially not if
I tell her to do it. She's literally a child,
It really is an irresponsible child.

Speaker 1 (52:32):
No, I don't want to do that. No, And you
wonder why the cats don't like you?

Speaker 2 (52:36):
Yeah, Like, come on. Her room can be smelled from
the kitchen former duplex. The whole side of the house
smells terrible. One time a cat pete in her shoes
and she left it for four days because I told
her to clean it. Some of the puke stains near
the cat bowls have been there for months. I even
found cockroaches in her room feeding on it. That's discussing you,

(53:01):
Oh my.

Speaker 1 (53:02):
Gosh, she's Dana's so high and mighty yeah being told
what to do, or at least like, hey, there's puke
on the floor and there's cockroaches. Yeah, She's like, well,
you want me to do that clean it. I'm not
gonna do that.

Speaker 2 (53:15):
She's willing to live in absolute filth just to prove
a point.

Speaker 1 (53:20):
That's crazy.

Speaker 2 (53:21):
Crazy. Our new lodger, Bob, who was Dana's friend for years,
told me that Dana was out of line and that
there were things going on in their household that I
didn't previously know about. He told me that Eli used
to get physical with Eddie and that various other bad
things happened to cut to the chase. I confronted Eddie
about this behavior. He defended his mom at first, but
eventually broke down and admitted that he was afraid of

(53:43):
the consequences of going against her. Eddie is very closed
off about his feelings. He revealed to me that his
sister Sharon basically was psychotic and at one point broke
down a solid wood door to get to him, like
the shining kind of thing. Yeah, that's what it sounds like.

Speaker 1 (53:57):
You're Sharon.

Speaker 2 (53:58):
Oh my gosh. She go into rages and pester him
for hours. Both of his sisters would torment him, his
parents would side with them or refuse to get involved,
and his sisters were given parties in large rooms and
trips and he never got anything of the sort. His
mother never had the time for him or paid him
any attention. His father verbally mistreated him and also got

(54:20):
physical with him. He was stuck in a tiny, half
finished room filled with sawdust, and he's allergic and splinters.

Speaker 1 (54:26):
He's literally Harry Potter, like.

Speaker 2 (54:28):
This actually is Harry Potter, but like there's no reason
for all this, He's not, like.

Speaker 1 (54:34):
This is real.

Speaker 2 (54:35):
Yeah, oh my goodness. His bed had bed bugs and
nobody did anything until they spread to the other rooms.
After his sister destroyed his door, he was blamed and
had no door, so he barricaded himself in his room
with his mattress. His psychological was so severe that he
basically suffered some memory loss in an attempt to block
it out. He's terrified of his family and has gone

(54:57):
along with everything because they will gang up on him
if he doesn't. Frankly, after hearing this, I want Dana out.
I've had enough of her petty, jealous, controlling and ungrateful behavior.
And to top it all off, now I found out
that she enabled the of my fiance. However, I'm afraid
of evicting her.

Speaker 1 (55:16):
She has nowhere to go that sucks to suck honestly,
if that's the case, Yeah, if you're dealing with someone
that just and that just just toxic, yeah, don't deal
with it.

Speaker 2 (55:31):
Right, I mean she I know they mentioned that the
other sisters like couldn't take her in for some reason,
but either can you.

Speaker 1 (55:39):
Which, so she has her sisters that she highly favors.
Why don't you go stay with them?

Speaker 2 (55:44):
Exactly? They can figure it out. You don't have to
be the one to do that. Also, Eddie wants to,
but he feels that he's not ready to confront her.
He thinks that she's an innocent victim, manipulated and taken
advantage of by her daughters. He's also scared his sisters
will gang up on him and pester him. He's convince
that he can force her to go no contact. He
lives his life and fear of all of them. And

(56:05):
I'm tired of waiting for him to grow a backbone.

Speaker 1 (56:08):
I mean, okay, yeah, I was gonna say, give him
a little bit of leeway. You have to talk to
him about it, take him to some therapy, yes, because
this is what his life has been, you know, right,
and cannot be like all right, now, you need to
stand up to your mom and your sister's the man.
The man had literal memory loss because he was so traumatized.

Speaker 2 (56:27):
That is serious stuff. Yeah, I agree. I think try
to be forgiving for him as much as you can.
But I do kind of see what she's saying where
it's like, at a certain point she can't just like
stand by and like let this happen.

Speaker 1 (56:40):
I think step by step. But ye, not saying your
husband or fiance in this case doesn't have a backbone.
I think it's a little bit too far fetched to
be like, yeah, we just found out about this, and
he's also just like come to terms with all this.

Speaker 2 (56:55):
It's very he's so processing.

Speaker 1 (56:58):
Yeah, the best way to support him is eliminating those
things that you know that he's afraid of.

Speaker 2 (57:03):
Yeah, for sure, not by.

Speaker 1 (57:05):
Taking them out, just by saying like yeah, yeah, yeah,
just like make sure you get it out of his life,
or you know, limiting the contact as much as you can.

Speaker 2 (57:14):
I'm really not sure what to do anymore. I'm starting
to get frustrated with how wishy washy he's been about
the whole thing. But at the same time, he's dealing
with some serious Stockholm syndrome. I guess I need help
getting his mother out of our lives and helping him
pick up the pieces with as little damage as possible. Also,
Eddie is aware of this post if anyone has advice
for him directly, and we do have an update, but
do we have any further advice for this situation for Eddie?

Speaker 1 (57:37):
You need to one mm hm therapy. Just that is
such a big thing that needs to You need to
talk to someone about it and maybe even talk to
your family about it, just to let the let that's
in the air. Yeah, if they just tease you about
it or don't care then you know, or they stand

(57:59):
then you then you're like, okay, listen, you guys did
all this from my childhood till now. I'm afraid of you.
You know. It's not even like this is like like
sibling banter or like oh siblings like haha. It's like
I'm terrified, literally afraid. Yeah yeah, so, and I can't.
I can't stand up to you guys because that was

(58:19):
the life I had as a child, and that's his
in his mental trauma and it's just traumatic past that
he's that little kid that he's like I'm barricading my
door with my mattress. That's insane.

Speaker 2 (58:30):
That is that is absolutely insane. And there's like that
line where Opie says he's convinced that he can force
her to go no contact with them, like if he
confronts the mom or the sisters. But maybe you can
start considering if that's a bad thing, you know, which
maybe that's what's best.

Speaker 1 (58:46):
Show him the positive side of Hey, if you do
this or you stand up for yourself, maybe they will
respect you. Or if you sell this, hey maybe they
will understand. But that's one of those things of what
if you have to do it first.

Speaker 2 (58:59):
Yeah, And I would even offer as op to, like
I mean, does Eddie need to be the one to
confront like can I understand? Like giving him that control?
I think that is good. But you can maybe offer like, hey,
if you don't want to do it, I.

Speaker 1 (59:13):
Can, yes, but I would. It's one of those things
like you know, you want to pick up this like
what OPI said, Yeah, pick up those pieces very carefully, Yes,
because if you do it yourself or if you do
it for him, it No, it should be for him
and for himself.

Speaker 2 (59:27):
But we do have an update. Oh and for the record,
I own my home. I inherited some money from my
grandmother and bought a rather large house with it. There
is no mortgage, and currently I'm the only person on
the title, so I am the landlord. There is no
actual lease with Dana and Bob, but there is a
verbal agreement that they will contribute to his bills in
lieu of rent, keeping their portion of the house clean,
and treat us with respect. She has broken all of

(59:50):
these terms, and he has broken none of them.

Speaker 1 (59:52):
If that's a verbal agreement with Bob, why are we
even brought Bob knows about this, So what's okay?

Speaker 2 (59:59):
Yeah, so that's browns in itself.

Speaker 1 (01:00:02):
You have a little proof of like, hey, yeah, she's
not you know, it's not working out. She's not doing
what she said she was going to do.

Speaker 2 (01:00:08):
Long story short, Eddie and I got in an argument
about Dane's behavior, and he snapped and got angrier than
he's ever been with me before. I literally was fighting
in my therapist's waiting room with him and felt at
an all time low. I decided to dump him when
I came out of my appointment. WHOA, I was not
expecting that me neither. Oh my gosh. When I came

(01:00:31):
out to him. His head was hung low and his
face was red. I informed him that I was evicting
his mother later that week and he was going with her.
He looked me in the eye and told me he
understood and began crying. He told me he understood just
how bad things were. His family had easily siphoned five
digits worth of money off of me, including him, his
car keeps sneating expensive repairs, and I had taken torrents

(01:00:54):
of verbal diarrhea from his sisters. He apologized for his
behavior and told me, regardless of what happened to me,
he was cutting all three of them, mother in law,
sister in law out of his life and going to therapy.
We ended up talking for a while and Eddie revealed
that the reason that he had taken his mother's side
for so long was that he was in denial about
the relationship. He realized that Dana didn't love him at

(01:01:16):
all and only wanted his attention when his sisters weren't
around and I was. She only paid attention to him
out of her own jealousy and loneliness. She didn't really
care about him at all. He realized now that Piney
for her love wasn't healthy and that he was done
doing her favors if he was getting nothing in return.
My own mother is very psychopathic and incapable of love,
so I understood. I told Eddie that I would give

(01:01:37):
him one last chance, but I wanted him to pay
me back his whole family's debt by supporting me while
I got back on my feet and got ready to
work and go on disability. I also told him that,
depending on his actions over the next few months, I
may still dump him.

Speaker 1 (01:01:50):
I don't like that.

Speaker 2 (01:01:52):
Yeah, there's a lot to unpack.

Speaker 1 (01:01:54):
There, there's a lot. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:01:56):
I feel for Eddie because of course, you know, when
you're in and in a relationship, you can't. It's very
hard to see, especially if this has been your parent,
your family, your whole family, and over your whole life.

Speaker 1 (01:02:09):
And I also feel for Op too, because Op is
just like, I'm tired around a waiting and they're also
taking literally big chunks of money from me, and no,
there's zero respect here and I'm getting barely you know,
a dime back, But that's that's between his family and you,

(01:02:29):
and he's working through things. Yeah, and I don't I
don't like the you know, if you do this, maybe
we can still get back together, or like I still
may don't. Yeah, you don't do that.

Speaker 2 (01:02:39):
I know. I I'm never a fan of like that
feels like an ultimatum of being like, like, if you
do this, like I'll I'll break up with you. You know.
I don't think that's ever like a healthy thing to
put on in a relationship. Yeah, but I do get
what she's kind of trying to say. I think of
like being like, but yeah, I thought I was going
to break up with you. I'm going to give you
another chance, but like you know, it's not going to

(01:03:01):
be back to normal right away.

Speaker 1 (01:03:02):
That's that's a totally different conversation. But the way Opie
stated was you're kind of doing it out of fear now, like, yeah,
if you don't do this or if they don't really
go back, if you don't really show me that you're
working on it, I still may dump you. Yeah. I
think that's like you're kind of like threatening him, right.

Speaker 2 (01:03:17):
I think there was a way to say that.

Speaker 1 (01:03:19):
There's a much better way of saying, Hey, you know,
I care about you. I want to give us another shot.
It may not be back to normal what it is,
and what it was, but I'm still willing to try
as long as you're willing to try.

Speaker 2 (01:03:32):
Eddie was a changed man over the next few weeks.
He started actively planning her eviction, taking legal steps, and
working on rebuilding our relationship, including spending time with me
and not on his computer. Things haven't been better, things
haven't been better in over a year. However, I'm keeping
my eye on him to make sure that he doesn't revert.
She was served the eviction last weekend. She went from

(01:03:52):
shock to denial to angrily blaming me within thirty seconds.
It was astounding. She started shooting her mouth off about
how she'd done us favors, helping us pay the bills.
It was astounding because she still owes me thousands. I
supported her and her son and another person financially for
four to five months, and she uses the utilities and
doesn't think that she should pay. Apparently. She also called

(01:04:15):
me over sensitive because the pea smell in her room
wasn't that bad and she's never actually seen cockroaches in there,
and there are cockroaches in your kitchen. Maybe if you
stopped leaving expired food in your fridge. Yeah, it's all
just her fault, going back to her again again.

Speaker 1 (01:04:30):
She is always going to be I'm always right, exactly
always wrong.

Speaker 2 (01:04:34):
Within three minutes of the conversation ending, we started getting
bombarded by Sharon. I haven't seen that much vitriol from
anyone in my whole life. Sharon sent my fiance dozens
of insanely long messages detailing how she'd always hate me
and all my slides against her, even though she's really
only met me three times and only talked to me once.
She emphasized how bad our home was, the way I

(01:04:56):
run it, how Dana does all our chores a lie,
she doesn't even do her, and she even went as
far as to mock my cooking. Dana always complains about
my weird her words, cooking. I'm a white girl with
a passion for Asian culture, and I cook a lot
of exotic food from scratch. Apparently, Dana, who's cooking consists
of heating up a bag of pasta and the stove,

(01:05:17):
told Sharon just how awful and disgusting my food was.

Speaker 1 (01:05:20):
If you didn't like the food, then why did you
eat it?

Speaker 2 (01:05:23):
Yeah? Just makes up make your micromievable noodles, dude. Yeah,
it stung a lot, because cooking is my passion and
she literally is the only person who doesn't like my food.
Most of all, it did reaffirm that she was passing
her information anyway. That night, I was called a witch,
a sea word, a witch, a slime, a bad girlfriend,

(01:05:43):
and some other things that I don't even want to repeat.
She called him a coward and told him that I
had removed his balls. She threatened to send us both
to Heck personally if she wasn't in another state. Well
that's a threat at that, that's like an actual concerning that.

Speaker 1 (01:06:00):
I'd love to see you try. There you go, there
you go, But it looks like you're getting evicted, So yeah,
go find a place first before you do anything else.

Speaker 2 (01:06:08):
He told her he wanted no more contact, but she
persisted through text and Facebook. She even started messaging Bob
about how he was a trader and how could he
do this to his poor mother. She told him to
contact her, gave him her number. He has no phone
and she knows this and immediately blocked him on Facebook
is only way of contacting her. She's so stupid.

Speaker 1 (01:06:27):
I love this.

Speaker 2 (01:06:28):
Bob got involved and talked to Dana, but she pretty
much was spitting vitriol about how I turned her son
against her and she wasn't paying anything next month, and
how could you betray me after we've been friends for
so long. Nowhere did she apologize or think about her actions.
If she had at least done that, I would have
given her a lot more time to find a place
than I did. So now we're at a point where

(01:06:50):
nobody in the house other than Bob is really talking
to Dana. She's completely bitter and making excuses about how
she has nowhere to go and can't afford it. Apparently
she told Bob that she she's decided to move across
the country and live with Sharon. Sharon smartly is renting
her an apartment in the same complex instead of moving
her in. But considering how extremely needy, jealous, and competitive

(01:07:11):
Dana is, I'm assuming she will virtually move into their
space anyway and try to break them up like she
did with us, so that she can have Sharon to herself.
She's also not coming to our wedding and is cutting
us both out, so that takes care of that for us.
I guess I'm here because I'm just in shock. I
can't believe that Dana could be so cold to her
own son, I can She's never really seemed to care

(01:07:32):
about him much. She's always jumped through fire for her daughters,
but she leeches off of her son no problem. She
accused him of selling out to me, and she wants
nothing to do with him now. She completely ignores us
both and accuses us of shunning her to Bob, I've
just been giving her space these past few days, but
she still has over a month here, and I'm getting
so tired of her behavior. I'm sickened by how she

(01:07:54):
treats my fiance and how I've been letting her use
us for a year. I guess if I need help
with anything, it's how to han. I'm tired of constantly
hearing her make accusations at us, seeing her daughters on
us when we make her mad, and just being openly nasty.
At least she has shown Eddie her true color. She's
also planning on bringing Sharon, who threatened us here, to

(01:08:14):
help her move across the country. I do not want
this crazy woman in my house. Sharon is the head
manager at her workplace. I'm thinking of contacting higher ups
in her company if she shows up and physically harms
us as well as the police. Sharon is completely paranoid
and off kilter, so I wouldn't put it past her
to harm me, and I'm wondering if the consequences at

(01:08:35):
her workplace would be enough to deter her from touching me.
Oh and before I forget to mention, Carrie is in
the military. Dana changed Carrie's legal address to our address
behind my back last week. We told her that we
would take care of it, but she went and did
it anyway. Carrie has military training and has also verbally
mistreated me before, and I'm not sure I want to

(01:08:56):
deal with getting rid of her when she's not even
here right now. I'm not quite sure what to do
about it, but I figure that when Dana moves, she
can change Carrie's mailing address to wherever she goes and
take Carrie's things with her. But you can always take
us with you. Just go to Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or
iHeartRadio and search Okay storytime. You can listen to our

(01:09:17):
full episodes of more stories just like this one. Take
us everywhere you go. Yeah, in your ear drums, but yeah,
there is a little bit more to the story. But
oh my Goodnow, Wow, wow, Wow, so much is happening.
So yeah, I like.

Speaker 1 (01:09:34):
That thing where you're like, Okay, the Sharon's coming to
help Dana get her out of the place and help
them move across the country.

Speaker 2 (01:09:41):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:09:42):
I don't think you need to jump to that conclusion
of I need to contact her workplace because you don't
want to get you know, meddled with all of that. Yeah,
but you can film it. You can film heay, I'm
recording this or you know I have I can like
just record this through my phone. Yeah, what have you like,
Just get your stuff out. Let let bygones, be bygones.

(01:10:03):
I just want you out easy, right.

Speaker 2 (01:10:06):
I think recording it is very smart. If she does
say or try anything again, then you have actual.

Speaker 1 (01:10:10):
Proof, you have proof. Actually you can record it. Great,
it's it's in the you know, your own home. So
what can they do. You're you know, they're entering your house,
get your stuff out. You can record it. See what
they do, see if they steal anything or again, get
any you know, just for your own sanity. In regards
of Dana being cold, these are these are true colors.

(01:10:32):
Great Eddie. I feel like Eddie's getting a breath of
fresh air. And once her, once his mom's actually gone,
it's gonna be such a weight off all of your
shoulders and he's gonna finally realize, Yeah, they did the
hard work. They're cutting cough contact with us. He didn't
have to do that. He didn't have to cough that,
and he didn't he didn't have to have that conversation
with them. They did for him pretty much. Yea, so great.

Speaker 2 (01:10:54):
There is a little bit more to the story. Things
with Eddie are better. We are still taking things slow,
but he's planning on starting therapy soon. Oh good. I'm
just glad everything is almost over because our relationship hasn't
been this good. He just seems at peace now that
they won't be in his life anymore. He's confident and happy,
and I am so proud of him. This will probably
be my last update here unless Sharon or even Carry

(01:11:16):
but highly unlikely shows up and causes some sort of
a scene. If I don't update, just assume everything went
well and we are living in peace, free of the crazy,
and I'm pretty sure so far we've got no update

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My brother’s fiancée won't stop messing with my sister… I finally had enough! - r/relationships | Reddit Stories | EP2151

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;} My brother’s fiancée won't stop messing with my sister… I finally had enough! - r/relationships | Reddit Stories | EP2151