February 24, 2020 • 47 mins
People warn you don't send it. It sounds like a fun, sexy idea but is the risk worth it? A lot of us have done it.
Paige feels it's time to share how a revealing photo she texted is now in the hands of strangers and on the internet.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
This is playing around with Page Renee PG play around
with Page Renee Episode three Genesis l A. We've been
everywhere and skyrocketing. I know, it's been great so far.
People seem to love the show, which huh. I was
like super nervous about it and when it was like
(00:22):
coming out, I was like having a massive panic attack.
And so now that people are like seem to like it,
it's been really really great, so validating. Yeah, it's just
it's something I've never done before. And then to be
just like so open and honest and talk about so
many things. Uh, it's it's like it just feels good,
you know. Yeah, well you should be commended because you did.
You threw yourself out there, and you threw some some
(00:44):
funny but also some vulnerable stuff out and uh and
it sounds like everyone's responding, yeah, no, they seem to
really like crabs, so that's great. Um. You know, there's
actually the story that I've wanted to talk about for
a really long time, pretty much the last like four
years of my career and in my life. It was
(01:05):
a really traumatic thing that happened to me, and I've
never publicly talked about it, and I get a lot
of messages and comments about people saying that I played
the victim and when I talk about bullying I they
say that I kind of it's happened to me and
I do it to myself, and that it doesn't I'm
not allowed to talk about it. I understand where they're
(01:27):
coming from because you see me, you know, crying at
press conferences or talking about being bullied and all of
this stuff, and it it seems really intense. And then
you look at my comments and someone's like, oh, like
you're you know, like you're a horror or you're a slut,
and like, okay, that's that's not still not okay, but
it's not that terrible, and so I can see why
(01:49):
people were saying that, like I'm playing the victim and
you know, I'm doing this to myself and I haven't
really been bullied or I haven't really been through an
experience that was actually traumatic. And so I'm finally like excited,
all excited. But I'm happy to share this with everyone
now because it was such a big part of my career,
(02:11):
especially during playing, and like why I have felt the
way I felt. So I'm just gonna get like right
into it. Are you ready. I think I'm ready. Yeah.
So I was seeing this guy for a while. The
way people date these days is not really in person.
(02:33):
It's kind of like long distance online. And so we
had this relationship that was just solely based online through
like texting, messaging and all that stuff. So I knew
this guy for such a long time. And um, another
big part was you just send pictures to them. And
I never really thought anything of it, and it was
(02:53):
just something that you know, he asked for. I thought
it was a nice thing for me to do, you know.
I wasn't like ashamed of my body, and he seemed
to really like them, so and I want him to
like me, and I thought if I sent these pictures,
he would like me more, which is a problem in itself.
We can talk about that later. So, um, you know,
we parted ways and everything was fine, and then I
(03:17):
kind of blew up overnight it went viral, and about
two weeks into all of this happening again, an email
from this guy and he said, hey, just a heads up,
but um, this person just sent everyone in the group
message a picture of you, um, an intimate picture of you,
and um it was to a lot of people and
(03:38):
so it got around really quickly. It went everywhere, and
it was horrible. Like when I got that email, I
just like my stomach dropped. I just felt so violated.
Take your time, and like the worst part was that
(04:01):
I had to tell my parents and it was like
going to my mom and my dad and saying, like,
I took a naked picture of myself and I sent
it to a guy, and to just tell them that
was the worst part about all of it. So I
end up calling all of my friends that knew him,
and I said, did he send you this picture? And
(04:24):
they were like, bro, code, I can't say anything, and
I have his back. And one of the one guy
he did say he did send it to me, and
so I knew it was him from this entire time.
And it didn't stop there. So it didn't luckily hit
the internet yet at that time, and so I was
(04:44):
getting um messages daily from people saying, Hey, is this you?
Is this you? Is this you? I didn't know them,
and it was horrible, Like to get these messages from Rhanna,
people you don't know and they've seen you in such
a vulnerable way. It was disgusting. And then they would
turn around on me, so when I finally confronted the
(05:05):
guy and I said, I can't believe he did this
to me. And he said, I'll never forget this. You
were the slut who sent it to me, of course,
and he said you deserved this, and he was like,
and you did, and you didn't even just send it
to me and sent it all these other guys. Well
they were getting it from all these other guys and
(05:25):
then claiming I sent it to them, and so is
this huge thing? And so I finally started to get
over it slightly a couple of months, but I still
get it every every single day I'd get a message
from some guys saying is this you? Is this you?
Is this you? And so I ended up playing in
this tournament in Dubai the second year, and right before
(05:48):
I had to go to a press conference. Well real quick,
so now you're you've gained a lot in popularity. That
are we jumping a little bit? Yeah, so we're jumping me.
So this is over like a four year span. So
the first section of the story was probably maybe like
six months. Okay, so this was after this was when
you were on your I just started like my yeah,
(06:08):
just at fresh out of college. Um, like six months
into it, and then um, like another like maybe another
six months or a year past, and this was still
kind of happening, but it wasn't It never hit the
internet and it wasn't like it was always there. But
it really wasn't that bad. But I was. I would
wake up every single day, I would check my phone
be like, Okay, am I gonna be on TMZ today?
(06:30):
Am I going to be here? Am I going to
be there? And that was like the worst parts, Like
I was constantly just so stressed out that like someone
was going to see it, and someone was going to
get in then it was going to get out. And
also like that was one picture. I don't know what
else he had or what he was going to release
or all of this other stuff. Like if he did
it once, he could do it again and again and
again and again. And I knew this guy for years,
(06:54):
so it was broken. And the worst part are about
all of it is I sent some really good stuff
and he picked that picture of like that picture is
the one you wanted to do? Like that was the
worst part about all of it now, But you, yeah,
(07:15):
how did your parents respond in that moment? So I
have really wonderful, like supportive parents, and they were like, okay,
like we're going through this, we understand, that's just kind
of how it is. And they were like, we don't
want to look at it. And I was like, like,
it's not that bad. My dad was so sweet, and
he was like, I really don't mean this in like
(07:36):
a weird, creepy dad way, but like it was tasteful,
like it could have been worse, and I and they
were just trying to say like anything they could to
make me feel better. And the picture really wasn't that bad. Um.
I'm sure a lot of you guys have seen it. Um,
but I was wearing you know, like um underwear or
panties as we like to call them now sometimes sometimes,
(07:57):
and then I had a open jean shirt and I
just had one breast exposed. So it really wasn't that bad.
But it was still the fact that they, you know,
violated my trust and they broke my trust and it
was just such a big violation of my privacy and
that was the worst part about it. Wasn't actually the picture.
(08:17):
It was just that I sent this to one person
he ended up sending it to everyone, so um. Back
to Dubai so Um. I went back for my second year,
and five minutes before I had to go to a
press conference, I got multiple messages from someone saying, if
you don't send me money or if you don't send
me another naked picture, I'm going to blackmail you and
(08:40):
I'm going to release the photos this morning, right now.
And it was just horrible because I've just been trying
to like push this under the rug for such a
long time and I don't want to get out and
so I ended up doing that press conference and I wait,
real quick, So five minutes before the press conference, you
got the message, you didn't respond. I showed my team
(09:01):
and I was like, what what do I do to this?
And it wasn't him, No, it was some random person
who had the picture. How are these people? Are these
people getting ahold of you? So no through DM on
Instagram and they were just getting this like I send
it to you, you send it to your buddies, your
body send it to and so it just grows into
this huge thing and like um a club professionally even
(09:25):
posted on Twitter, and like people in the industry were
posting it and talking about it as if it was
a joke. And it wasn't a joke, and so it
was like five minutes before I went out, and I
was freaking out, like this is literally my worst nightmare,
Like I'm already trying to prove myself as a serious golfer.
Now I'm going to have this like titty picture out
there for everyone to see. And so I went to
(09:47):
the press conference and I lost it. I just started crying.
It's like, I just think about that moment because I
felt so wonderb all the cameras on me. And after that,
no one knew what was going on in my life.
No one knew the half of it. And not only that,
but I was struggling with a lot of anxiety obviously
(10:09):
because there's just so much going on in my life,
and then also depression, and so it's like this on
top of everything else. So no one knew, No one
knew any of this. So I was getting comments from
people saying, like, you're doing this to yourself. You deserve
those comments because you show cleavage on Instagram and you
know you over sexualize yourself and you deserve this, and
(10:32):
you have no right to claim that you're being bullied. Meanwhile,
I am being harassed and sent death threats and blackmailed
over this picture that this guy you know, oh, even
like we ruined my life over it, and no one
knew that. And so it's so hard to like sit
there and take it and how people think that I
was playing the victim when all of this was happening.
(10:55):
So let me, can I just go back? All right?
So the press conference, you just broke down, right, you
just now broke down talking about that, right, So tell
me did you say did you say anything of the
press conference or was that just a moment where you
finally cracked. I just I think I just cracked. So
the year before too, where I played that tournament, I
received a sponsor exemption and I received a lot of
(11:17):
hate because of that, and um, a lot of people
are saying that I only got it because of the
way I look and I took someone else's spot and
I was receiving death threats and people were saying I
was horrible for golf and a bad role model and everything.
And so I came back again to this tournament to
prove myself. Yet the same thing happened all over again,
being bullied to the point where like I didn't want
(11:38):
to go play did the press talk to do, did
anything anyone in the press or during that conference news
conference say anything. No one publicly mentioned it in an
interview or anything. Um, but it was still something that
I was always so scared someone was going to ask
about it or they were going to bring it up.
(11:58):
And so I would talk to my friends on tour
and I'm like, like, have you seen it? And They're like, yeah,
we've all seen it. Everyone has seen it. And the
thing that was the worst about it, and I still
get it to this day, it was that guys were
using that picture as proof of sleeping with me and
that never happened. These were guys I didn't even know.
(12:20):
And I would meet, you know, someone and be like, oh,
you dated my friend so and so, and I'm like no,
They're like they have this this picture of you, like
I never even met them, and and I that was
the most frustrating part is that people were using that
against me again and painting me out to be this
person that I'm not. I just sent one picture to
(12:41):
a guy that I really really cared about, and I
just did it because I wanted him to like me.
That's the worst part, of course. And so I ended
up playing in a tahoe at They have a huge
celebrity event there, yeah Edgewood, and so I played. It
was my first time playing. I was really nervous, and
I you they always have like a bunch of people
(13:03):
and they bring you you know, like pictures, magazines, whatever,
and you sign autographs. And so there was a guy
who was there the first two days really nice to me.
I spent a lot of time talking to him and
what didn't seem weird or anything. So the next day
he pulled me up. He said, hey, Page, I really
need you to sign something. And so I walk up.
There's so many people around, like lines of people, little kids,
(13:25):
and he whips out a blown up picture of my
nude and he said, can you sign this for me?
It's for my personal use, and I lost it. I
lost it. I I just stood there and started bawling.
And the security guards like what happened? What happened? And
(13:45):
I just couldn't, like I was paralyzed again with fear,
and like it's just I can never escape the picture.
It's always there, and it's still it's still didn't hit
the internet yet, and so again it's like these little
things kept happening where I was like, Okay, I think
I'm over. Maybe a month pass and it's brought up again,
and it's brought up again. It's brought it up again,
(14:07):
and it keeps always reminding me also of this guy
and like what he did to me, and just all
the traumas, like every single life event also was tied
into that, which was also super traumatic for me. And
then so a couple of months pass, and for the
longest time, my biggest goal was to get Sports Illustrated
swim soon. That's the one thing I really wanted to get.
(14:27):
And so I get a call and I got it.
Ten minutes later, I get a call from my agent.
Your picture hit the internet. It was everywhere. So I
had to reach out to all of my partners to
Sports Illustrated say like, this is what happened, Like I
haven't knew what it's out there, and luckily none of
them dropped me. But it's like, it's so sad that
(14:48):
I had to like being in that position, like I
was my fault. It was my fault that I put
myself in this position, and now I have to apologize
for what this guy did to me. I think you're
being I mean, it's such a deep wound that that
you're when you say it's your fault. I know what
you're doing. You're owning the story because you you do
own what you did to to to send that nude
(15:11):
to your boyfriend. I mean, I know what you're saying,
but fault is should be the last thing we're talking about.
This is just this is not only betrayal, it's just
it's deliberately um uh uh uh manipulated. You've been manipulated.
And they made me feel so horrible about my body
for such a long time to like I felt so ashamed,
(15:34):
like I didn't even want to look at myself in
the mirror. I didn't feel like sexy and none of it.
I just didn't want to see I didn't want anyone
to see me that way. But then also on the
flip side, it made me so angry that I didn't
care what I was doing with my body too, So
I just had this like I don't care, like whatever,
guys are just gonna do whatever, and like I just
(15:55):
wasn't proud of the person that I was becoming. And
it was all just because of like this and what
that happened to me. So it was. It was just
the whole thing has just been like really difficult. Obviously,
this is a really heavy conversation, like as a female
to female. It's such a male dominant sports sports industry
and it's very conservative. So how did you how did
(16:19):
you navigate? Did you feel like you to navigate those
conversations in a certain way or did you feel like
you have to put on a sade of like this
is my body, I'm fine, I'm I'm so comfortable with
my body that I honestly don't care about it when
you were talking to you know, the fellow golfers, and
then how did you navigate that? As a Yeah, I
think when I would post, my message is always like
(16:39):
body positivity and love yourself. But and it was I
wear what I wear and it's okay to be sexy.
But on the inside, I was so confused and I
didn't know like what I stood for what was going on.
And it is really difficult because I would walk into
a PGA Tour event and I'm like, they have all
seen me naked, all of them, and they're so fake
(17:01):
to my face that they won't even say anything about it.
And they all shared it to each other and no
one can apologize, No one can say I'm sorry that
I did this and I sent to someone else. I
actually have a really important, important to me follow up question.
But what what? What the thing is is is it's
it's easy to blame page right. And also, let's also
(17:26):
think about it. She is the focus of all the
attention on it either way. The guy that did it,
he is, he is the weasel, and and the the
thing that works is the men. Men work on a
low common denominator and a high common denominator, right, and
when they can be when they when they can have
(17:46):
something that they can brag about, they'll go to the
lowest common denominator because that will get the most people. Right.
If you throw it out there that guy sent it,
let's just say that that weasel sent it to a
hundred people. I guarantee you. To one of them said
you're a dick. I'm guarantee you. But it doesn't matter
because the eighty are louder, because the eighty now have
(18:07):
something to do, now have something to take to their friends.
So how how how can that be? It's real easy.
It's been happening since the first day of time, right,
because that's the high road. Is the high roads hard
because you have to use moral courage. And I think
that people thought I would be okay with it because
I do have more of like a sexy image and like, oh,
(18:29):
it's like what's womboo? What's womb boo? But they just
like they're losing the whole message behind it. And the
person that I am on social media is not actually
who I am, And a lot of people just don't
know a lot about my personal life because I don't
choose to share a lot of small details. I'm very open,
as you guys know, Like I don't mind sharing a
lot of things, but there's a lot of stuff I
do like to keep to myself and my naked body
(18:52):
was one of them, and that was taken away from me.
But it should never be behind closed doors. Like just
because that's your platform doesn't mean that everybody has a
right to your platform. You know, it's like you're getting
catfish by somebody else's photos and you're got to meet
up with the person. It's not then you don't have
a right for that photo. That there's nothing is justified
behind that. You're completely lying, you're being shady and manipulative.
So I just I think that's the problem with you guys.
(19:15):
This is a digital problem too. I mean, like, no, sorry,
it's not a it's not a digital problem. It's just
enhanced tenfold by by all the social media. I'm sorry
it is. What doesn't make sense to me is that
these guys are asking for these pictures correct, Like they
they're they're like, hey, can you send me this? Or
why anyone seen hey getting a group with Hey? I could?
(19:39):
I could get it? Yeah, I'm sure. I swear to god,
I haven't seen it, and I won't. I swear to
god I've never seen it and I've never looked for it,
but I know I could get it. You could get
in a second. But right now, here's the thing. It's like, Okay,
girl sends you nude, that's a good thing. Why would
you break that trust? Why would you do that? Like
it's so stupid that they want to share that with
(20:00):
other friends, like we all got boobs, Like it's not
that big of a deal when you think about it's
like why why did they do that? And then the
guys never get in trouble for it. I have a question,
and Josh, maybe you can help me, when does the
male brain change their perspective on like woman being their
badge of honor, or of a moment like that, like
if you have kids. So, hearing her story, I'm sure
(20:24):
there was a point where you're in the locker room
and things happen. Not saying you ever partook in it,
but you know you're definitely environment No, no, no, And
I had and no to be to be fair, Yeah,
I've I've said some things I've been ashamed of as
a do right, So what is that as a woman?
We like, we do that too, I agree, but I
think there's there there's a different level. We're talking about
(20:47):
this level right now, and then no one wants to
see a dick exactly. It's very true. Um, but so
when when did it We've already discussed dickpas, we don't
like them, but when did it change for you as
a man? Weren't Do you realize there is almost an
abuse here talking about women in this level and I
want to be held to a higher standard. Okay, Um, well,
(21:07):
I can remember times when I said, WHOA, I got
to clean it up. And actually it started as early
as high school. It started as early as high school
because I My best friend in high school was a girl,
and I heard people guys on the team that I
(21:28):
was with talking and talking about her, and I'm just like, wow,
you know, if they were talking about some other girl,
I probably would have just listened or whatever, or maybe
even chimed in with a good joke or something. But
it was my best friend. I was like, Oh, hey,
motherfucker's that's not okay. That doesn't mean I was cured
(21:48):
in high school, but that that relationship, that good relationship
I had with a female at that age helped out right,
and that there was a mutual respect with that friendship. Well, now,
I always think like once you have like a daughter
or you're married, right, But I'll get messages from these
guys sending me this picture and I'll look at their
profile and they have like two daughters, and I'm like,
(22:11):
why would you? Why would you do that? And like
the thing too that was really confusing that the guys
that were slut shaming me, they sent me dick picks,
unsolicited dick pics, and I had them like in my phone.
I'm like, you did the exact same thing I did,
But why is it okay when you do it? And
then it's a horrible thing when I do it. So
let me ask you another question I have, I have
like ten, but this that just hit me on another one.
(22:33):
Do you ever feel like taking control of that and
sending that to taking the dick pics that they're doing
because they know they're almost counting on secrecy, right, they're
almost counting on you're not saying anything. Have you ever
thought of doing something with that? No? Because then I'm
just as sh as they are. So for me, like
winning in my mind was taking control of my body.
(22:54):
So I ended up doing sports ill straight swimsuit and
I had again a very emotional interview. You guys are
going to knows about me. I cry a lot, So
I'm gonna cry a lot on this podcast, so bear
with me. I'm always gonna cry. So I end up
having a very emotional interview where I talked about owning
my body, and again no one understood why I was
(23:15):
talking about that because of they didn't they didn't understand
the whole journey that I had with this picture. So
I was doing this interview and I was talking about,
you know, loving my body, owning my body, and in
one of the shots, I did this um I had
a couple of topless shots. But when I was just
wearing like this fish net material over my chest and
I was I was laying down and I was that
(23:36):
was nude. You know, I was completely naked, and that
was like the best moment for me. I felt so
empowered and I was like, Okay, if I'm gonna do this,
I'm doing it on my terms and I and I
took it back. I took my body back, and that
was the moment I won right there, when I had
Sports Illustrated swimsuit and I had my tips out. And
that was four years later, yeah, four years And now
(23:57):
let me ask you, is that it's it? That was
I think that was the moment where I finally got
over it. Yeah. I was like I did it, Like
I won. What he did. He thought he was going
to like ruin me, and I turned that into a positive.
And now I'm a Sports Illustrated swimson model and you
can never take that away from it. I did have
(24:27):
another question, and you can tell me if you don't
want to answer this one, But earlier on when we
were when we were rolling on this, you said you
did you say you weren't taking care of your body,
or it caused you to not take care of your
body or hurt your body. I think not in where
I was self harming, but more just maybe um, I
don't want to say being like promiscuous, but I wasn't
(24:50):
giving myself enough respect. So that was with the way
guys were treating me. So I went through this period.
Um it was right after college, kind of ryan when
the picture happened to be about two years and I
I had no self respect. I didn't like if a
guy mistreated me, I thought it was my fault. And
(25:10):
I would still I would still send them pictures because
I thought my my only worth was my body and
they wanted to see that and I had nothing else
to offer. And I think that was like the worst
part for me because I know how much I'm worth
now and I know that I'm like, I'm smart, and
I'm funny and I'm all these things. But back then,
I only thought that my body would get me attention
and and guys only like me for that reason, and
(25:32):
so I I hated that. And I think that's how
young girls feel like in middle school and in high
school because they guys make them. They play these like
messed up mind games. You said that in my stomach
turns took me back. Yeah, because they'll be like, um,
(25:52):
I'm having I would be like, oh, I'm having a
bad day, and I'll make I want to make you
feel better, how to make you feel better? And they'll
be like, you know what to do? And then it's like, well,
I don't want to do that, and then they don't
stop talking to you, and so you feel like you
have to then send a picture to get that attention again.
And so they kind of like play these games with
you to get you to do this, and then once
you do it, they got it, they share it, and
(26:13):
then you feel even worse about yourself and you're slut
shamed and like that was the worst part for me,
And I think that's why I was the most ashamed
about all of this, was that I thought my only
my worth was only my body and no one was
gonna like me for anything more than that. Okay, so
I don't you know I have a daughter. Yeah, so
and there's either there's guys with daughters listening right now,
(26:37):
or there are the daughters listening. I think, what would
you do if I was your fifteen year old daughter?
And I said I sent a nude picture and this
guy shared it. Yeah, and probably would want to kill
the guy first, and then I'd find the guy. Oh no, listen,
I would try and find the guy. I honestly would.
Um My, I without you know, with with keeping my
(27:00):
daughter's privacy and stuff. I there's there's stuff like that
that we have to I'm dealing with right now with
her and and social the snapchat and all that, you know,
all of the things that are going on right now.
And she's she's a teenager. So you gotta breathe and
breathe and breathe because it's it's all new and and
(27:23):
we we we said two years ago or three years ago,
four years ago, anything you put on there, just count
on it always being on there forever now, any single
picture you take, and I'm sorry, I'm sorry because a
relationship that might be good, that one with the weasel
might have been good at some point, and unfortunately you
(27:46):
in in that relationship, you you got, you got burned
the hardest and idn't the thing I think back, and
it was never good. Okay, So PG, let's do this.
Then give me some things that come to your mind
that you would tell or guys like me with daughters
or the daughters that are listening right now, just and
take your time, and they don't have to be like
(28:07):
you know, they don't have to be ten commandments, but
just maybe pages ideas of what would be helpful, how
to feel strong enough to not do it. I think
I don't have kids, so obviously it's gonna be hard
for me to give the best advice because I don't
know how it is. But I would say, as a parent,
know that it probably is happening, and it probably already
(28:29):
has happened, and she or he might be too afraid
to come to you and tell you that you know,
they're sharing it already, and just be try to not
make it obviously awkward. It's going to be awkward, uncomfortable,
but just and don't be judgmental. Don't say whatever you
put out there's going to be there forever. We know that,
you know, like you send it and you you kind
(28:50):
of have that feeling like maybe I shouldn't have done that.
I shouldn't we know, but like be understanding and just
be a support system for them, you know. And I
think it's hard because a lot of parents don't really
understand how things work, especially like snapchat, and so in
our minds we think that it's something that you just
send to someone in a racist forever. You don't realize
(29:12):
that they can screenshot it, or they can record it
off of someone else's phone, they can do all these
other things. But I think just be really comforting to
them and also make sure they realize that it's not
it's not their fault, they're the victim in the situation,
and that they should be proud of their body no
matter what. I think, the naked body is beautiful and
(29:32):
it shouldn't be looked upon as something that is bad.
And if you are sharing it, be strong about it,
Like you looked amazing in that picture. That's why you
sent it because you looking hot. Own it and just
yeah I looked good. It sucks, yeah, but I look good.
Own your body and take it back. And I think
as a parent, like there are things you can do,
(29:52):
like you can go to the principle, or you can
talk to your child, or you can do all these
other things. But I think you need to go to
your kid for and tell them, like, be proud of
who you are and love yourself and love your body,
because I think that's the most important thing. Okay, And
let me just go back a little bit and that
what we're talking about is that it I want to
be clear that, especially to all the dad's out there,
(30:14):
that you did not you owned the picture to your
boyfriend and and that's not that's not any of that part.
The part of it that that you regret is that
that guy happened to be your boyfriend. So let me
ask you this. And you said you saw some signs
on on and now you know hindsight and let's hey, look,
(30:38):
we're not going to find the weasel, but let's let's
just talk a little bit about him. What are some
of those things that that sort of clicked afterwards? I
think if they belittle anything that you say and make
you feel like you're worth is only your body. So
if they say things like prove it to me or um,
I won't show any one, or you know, I uh,
(31:01):
I just want to tell you how good you look.
There's like things that they do. But it's not only that,
Like when they're trying to send you it. Look what
their focuses are they asking how your day is doing?
Do they care about you? Are they making an effort
to show you love and encouragement and support and other
things outside of just your body. I think if you're
seeing signs like I only want to hook up with you,
I'm only talking to you after you send me a picture.
(31:23):
I'm going to ignore you until you send me something. Um.
It's like almost their attention is a reward for you
sending the picture. So it's Manipulation is a big thing.
I think it's really hard to see it when you're
in it because you just want to seek validation from
someone else. I think if you are that person and
(31:44):
you feel like you need to prove yourself to someone
else and they're not the person for you, they should
love you and care for you and think you're the
most amazing person ever without ever seeing what you look like,
that is a gift to them. And that's just the
icing top of the cake. You are the real prize,
not your body. So let me. I'm actually want to
(32:05):
ask any of you women that want to answer this,
do you think that I mean? And when you say that,
it's it clicks in my head. That's classic manipulation. I've
seen it a million times. I've seen you know, I've
I've watched that happen. Do you think that young women
are more susceptible at a younger age or do you
(32:26):
think it's a personality type? Do you think it's a
where where do you think the most susceptibility, Like do
you think like a's seventeen to twenty or more vulnerable
to that kind of a dick or is it it
still goes on at twenty four or unfortunately goes on
Because the thing is, it's it's the it's rooted in
wanting your identity or to feel loved or to feel
(32:49):
special or to feel noticed um through a man or
through a significant other or a partner um. So you
really get wrapped up in those relationships. And that's why
I think you to constantly reroute your thought process being like, Okay,
you are not my life, You're not my identity. I
you have other hobbies, passions, whatever it may be, but
you still always have that soft spot when you are
(33:10):
dating another person that you want to feel like they're
number one and they want you and they want you,
and you feel so desired in that moment, like you
feel like, wow, I'm actually, like you know, doing something
that they're only getting and that makes you feel like
a really special connection, which I think maybe feels deeper
to the female versus the male. Oh yeah, And I
(33:30):
think it's also more on someone's personality. So I'm a
real people pleaser, and I will do anyone I'll do
anything to make someone like me and I want. I'll
go out of my way to do anything for you.
If you're having a bad day, I will drop everything
and be there for you. I'll get you what you need,
I'll bake you a cake. I'll do all of these things.
(33:51):
And so when a guy sees that in a female,
doesn't matter what age, they're gonna take advantage of it
and be like, Okay, well she's gonna do anything for me,
well then send me a nude, you know, And and
then I'll do it. I'll do anything for you. And
like I that's one thing I really I love about
myself because I think it makes me a very caring person.
But I also hated about myself because I'm at the
(34:13):
beck and call of all of these It's in the
wrong hand. Yeah, And so like when I was dating,
I would if he called me at one o'clock in
the morning for a ride, I would give him that
ride to another girl's place, you know, and it's like
I do all these things, and I think back on
I'm like, I am such an idiot, Like I didn't
see it. But I just want to do anything I
could to like prove that I was the loyal one.
(34:35):
I was the one who was going to be there
for him. I was going to, you know, be that
person he didn't care. I think it's not being the
nurturing um DNA in the female body, where we really
want to like nurture and be there and take care
of and so if you need to be taken care
of sometimes it can really go against you. Yeah. Sure,
(34:56):
I mean it's your biggest strength, that's also your biggest weakness.
I'm a big believer in your biggest strength also being
your biggest weakness. But also you you got to understand
with with the uh, not only UM, your emotional maturity
over a guy has got to be about a decade
at least UM, and that you want these things because
you want devotion and love and to be that one
(35:20):
person whereas we're so goddamn scared of our feelings period
that we just need I don't know where I'm happy.
I gotta but if I'm happy here, this works? So
how do I do you start here instead of here
and you start with your dick instead of your heart
or your head, right, because that's that calms calms, calms
(35:40):
you down, or or or makes you a man, or
makes you cool in front of other people, or or
or answers a whole lot of problems. And I don't
think it's like a man woman type of thing where
it's like all women are like this, are all men
are like I do think I've seen a couple of
my friends who are the complete opposite, and they don't
they don't care at all, and they've actually heard a
(36:01):
lot of guys in the process because they're doing the
same things that that guy did to me. And so
I think it is it comes down to like your
personality and just how you are and how you want
to receive love and what you're comfortable with, because a
lot of people aren't comfortable with actually being vulnerable and open,
and it's just easier to push people away instead of
taking that in and like knowing that if you open
(36:24):
up to this person, you might lose them and then
you're gonna be heartbroken, and it's easier just to have
that wall up and that guard and I've never been
that way. I've been the absolute opposite. Like when I
fall in love with someone, I fall so hard and
so fast, and I'm so I mean, I'm telling, you know,
all of these people I don't even know listening to
this podcast about my you know, deepest darkest secrets, the
(36:45):
most you know, traumatic times in my life. I just
I love to talk, I love to share, and I'm
just a very open, vulnerable person. And I would always
go for guys who had like the biggest guard up
and they were just cold designs. Well so in a way, though,
you are now taking it and owning it for yourself.
It's almost like you posting that picture of yourself and
(37:07):
owning it and coming from you. That's what this that's
what this episode is turning out to be. Is you
taking all of that and saying, Yep, this is what
I am. This is how you can manipulate me, but
I'm taking the power. You're not gonna yeah, And I
think that's why I had to tell this story finally,
because it was such a big part of my life
for the last you know, four or five years now,
(37:28):
and a lot of kind of memorable moments that people
seem to always recall back to revolved around the picture.
And yes I was emotional, and yes I said all
these things, but it was because I was being harassed
and blackmailed and sent death threats and like, um, my
privacy was being violated, and all of these things were
(37:50):
happening to me, and I was a victim of bullying.
That is bullying, That is cyber bulling at its best
right there, and that's happening to so many kids these days.
And I think my biggest advice to those kids if like,
if you are a parent and you have a kid listening, um, no,
you're worth I think that's the biggest thing. Right. It
(38:12):
still sucks, and it still sucks that it's out there
and that everyone can see it and that they can
do whatever they want with it. And that is so
scary for me, and I know I'm gonna have a
lot of anxiety until this comes out. But my main
focus and the reason I wanted to do this podcast
is wanted to give people a better look into my
(38:33):
life and things that I have gone through. But the
biggest thing is to help people to make a difference,
to have a voice, because that's how when I went
into golf. I wanted to make a difference because I
never felt like I fit in and I want to
talk about things in golf that were a problem for me.
And I realized that I'm not I'm not powerful enough.
I don't have enough influence to actually create change in golf.
(38:55):
And so I feel like what I've done has been
for nothing, and so with this, it's for something. And
I think, I think so I think this is you
do have influenced Dammit, Page, thank you for all of that,
but you guys right in, Um, guys, girls, whatever, I
(39:15):
don't give a show some love right now because this
was a lot and this was painful and and and
women can share their their stories as well. Um, but
I'd like to hear both sides of it too. I like,
if you are a guy that you've shared a picture, um,
I want to know maybe why you did or what
your thought process around it would be. And then also
(39:35):
I think you being a parent can speak to this.
But this is a really big problem, especially with young
girls and like middle school and high school and how
how to handle it and if you've gone through it
and what to do with that, because I think that's
that's a really important conversation. Well, and I really appreciate it.
So look, I I have a daughter and she's in
high school, she's a teenager, right, and um, you you
(39:59):
all of this, all of this cybership was not even
around when I was. When I was, you know, growing up,
and then you've got kids and all of a sudden,
this is another thing that can happen to them. And
I'm you know, obviously the first thing I did is
as soon as she's ten or eleven, I say, anything
you put on the Internet is gonna end up there forever,
don't do it. Don't do it, don't do it. But
but like it's but the thing is, like that's that
(40:21):
doesn't make it happens happens, right, and your your your
daughters and your sons. They they they get to live
their own life and they get to make their own mistakes.
And I'm not saying, you know that it's gonna happen everybody,
but it's gonna happen to enough people that we have
to worry about this, we have to talk about this. Um,
I'm terrified for for my daughter's safety on seventeen different levels, Um,
(40:46):
all of which you're facing, you know, and whatever it
is on the internet, and whatever whatever it is physically
when when men are physically close to her, and and
and and when they think they can have a voice
with her, and so it does. And I gotta be honest,
like Page, I was not a saint growing up. I
mean I have done something that. I mean, none of
us are perfect. We've all made mistakes. Like and I
(41:07):
think a big thing too, it's like if you kids
need to know that if you're under age and you
have a picture of a girl or anyone that is
under age, you could go to jail for it. It's
a really big problem. And I don't think a lot
of kids in high school when they're sharing something realized that,
like they're going to end up in a lot of trouble.
(41:29):
So think twice about it before you share it. Like
it's on the other side too, it's it changed a
little bit when you obviously when you're over eighteen, and
then that's you know, it's a little bit harder to
get it off and the laws are a little bit
more blurred and it's weird. But when you are under
age and this happens, you are in huge trouble. So parents,
(41:51):
that's a great thing for parents that are listening, parents
that are listening, if you want to, if you're if
your high school kids, there's one thing to tell you
right now. If they get caught sharing any kind of
new for having even just having the picture on their phone,
you're gonna go, You're gonna get in a lot of trouble.
That's a great that's a great deterrent. But look, and
the other thing that I think the page is showing
me is that sometimes whether it happens or not, it happened.
(42:13):
She she she got she was betrayed, She she had feelings,
and she had vulnerabilities that allowed her to take this
this this photo. And I think that's going to happen
more often than it's not out there. So what what
what we what she's trying to spread And what I
think I'm picking up is that let's be kind to
to those mistakes. They're just mistakes like everyone else. It's
(42:34):
just it's just unfortunate that now they're there and quotations
forever on the internet. So um, and don't slut shame
the girl like that is just one thing that has
always really bothered me. Um, if it happens like just
don't talk about it, you know, like, don't slut shame
her for something that you asked for, Like you asked
(42:56):
her to do this and she did it because she's awesome,
and I mean everyone loves boobs. Like this is a
good thing, by the way, Yeah agreed, Like yeah, like
this is a good thing. Guys, Like, don't ruin a
good thing. Don't ruin it. But like if you say
something in passing, because maybe you're just trying to like
be cool with the guys, just trying not to slust
(43:18):
shame the girl, just don't do that. Like it ruins
a lot of things. Like I have had such a
weird relationship with like being comfortable with my sexuality and
like owning who I am and like feeling comfortable with
that because I've been slush shamed for like pretty much
since college until now, and like I just it's just
(43:41):
not fun. It's not fun to go through that. It's
not fun to think that people are saying these nasty
things about you all the time. Just like, don't do it. Heard,
that's lovely, as easy as that, And you know what,
you can always everyone's everyone's got a place in that
food chain. So whether you're not committing or being committed
against you can also help other people by partake. Partaking
(44:05):
You're you're brave and badass and I'm so girls, so
it's grateful that you drop that. Yeah, if you've gone
through this, or guys, if you've known someone about this,
please just send me a comment like, I'm here to talk.
I'm here to be an ally for you. UM, I
really want to hear from you. I want to be
someone that you guys can talk to. So I'm here
(44:28):
where where PG come on? Drop it. You can email
me at p A R at I heart radio dot
com and don't forget to follow us on Instagram at
Playing Around podcast and also my personal Instagram which is
page Renee. Um. You can send messages to either of them.
Probably better to send them either to the email or
(44:50):
the UM podcast UM Instagram account just because I can
see those a little bit easier and better, and we
got people reading those, yes, so UM, they'll let me know.
But I I want people to know also that I'm
going to personally read them and respond to them because
that's something that I've always wanted to do, is to
connect with my followers. And so, UM, if you just
(45:12):
don't feel comfortable sending it or wanting it to be
discussed on the podcast, or in any way. You could
always send me a personal message and I will right back.
I control all of my all my social media, but
especially my Instagram accounts, so when you get a response
from me, my verified account, it's from me. And so
I want people to know that I will respect their privacy.
(45:33):
And if it's something that you're uncomfortable with or that
you're not quite ready to share, but to me, just
know that, like I will, I'll have your back. I'll
be there for you, and I'm there if you want
to talk. That's very liberating. I'm not gonna lie. I
feel so much better now. I I feel really great.
And this is just this is an episode for me
(45:54):
that I have wanted to talk about. This is one
of the main reasons why I wanted to have this podcast,
and so I just want to thank everyone for listening
to me talk about this and sharing my story because
this is something that has taken a long time for
me to come to terms with, not only just the picture,
but like myself as a person. So that's it. That's
(46:16):
that's Episode three. Guys, keep on listening. I have more
juicy drama, not just like SAP stories about my life,
which I actually do have a lot, so maybe we'll
talk about that next one. Um, but I have a
lot of really fun stuff and if you like this,
there's definitely more to come. And don't forget to subscribe,
Like we're just like putting it out there, barriers to break,
(46:38):
that's what you're gonna do. Well, thank you Josh for
listening to me, Tory. It was great. We're here for you,
all right, Subscribe, come back, follow playing around with Page
Renee on IR Radio, or subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts.
This is playing around with Page Renee PG play around
with Page Renee Episode three Genesis l A. We've been
everywhere and skyrocketing. I know, it's been great so far.
People seem to love the show, which huh. I was
like super nervous about it and when it was like
(00:22):
coming out, I was like having a massive panic attack.
And so now that people are like seem to like it,
it's been really really great, so validating. Yeah, it's just
it's something I've never done before. And then to be
just like so open and honest and talk about so
many things. Uh, it's it's like it just feels good,
you know. Yeah, well you should be commended because you did.
You threw yourself out there, and you threw some some
(00:44):
funny but also some vulnerable stuff out and uh and
it sounds like everyone's responding, yeah, no, they seem to
really like crabs, so that's great. Um. You know, there's
actually the story that I've wanted to talk about for
a really long time, pretty much the last like four
years of my career and in my life. It was
(01:05):
a really traumatic thing that happened to me, and I've
never publicly talked about it, and I get a lot
of messages and comments about people saying that I played
the victim and when I talk about bullying I they
say that I kind of it's happened to me and
I do it to myself, and that it doesn't I'm
not allowed to talk about it. I understand where they're
(01:27):
coming from because you see me, you know, crying at
press conferences or talking about being bullied and all of
this stuff, and it it seems really intense. And then
you look at my comments and someone's like, oh, like
you're you know, like you're a horror or you're a slut,
and like, okay, that's that's not still not okay, but
it's not that terrible, and so I can see why
(01:49):
people were saying that, like I'm playing the victim and
you know, I'm doing this to myself and I haven't
really been bullied or I haven't really been through an
experience that was actually traumatic. And so I'm finally like excited,
all excited. But I'm happy to share this with everyone
now because it was such a big part of my career,
(02:11):
especially during playing, and like why I have felt the
way I felt. So I'm just gonna get like right
into it. Are you ready. I think I'm ready. Yeah.
So I was seeing this guy for a while. The
way people date these days is not really in person.
(02:33):
It's kind of like long distance online. And so we
had this relationship that was just solely based online through
like texting, messaging and all that stuff. So I knew
this guy for such a long time. And um, another
big part was you just send pictures to them. And
I never really thought anything of it, and it was
(02:53):
just something that you know, he asked for. I thought
it was a nice thing for me to do, you know.
I wasn't like ashamed of my body, and he seemed
to really like them, so and I want him to
like me, and I thought if I sent these pictures,
he would like me more, which is a problem in itself.
We can talk about that later. So, um, you know,
we parted ways and everything was fine, and then I
(03:17):
kind of blew up overnight it went viral, and about
two weeks into all of this happening again, an email
from this guy and he said, hey, just a heads up,
but um, this person just sent everyone in the group
message a picture of you, um, an intimate picture of you,
and um it was to a lot of people and
(03:38):
so it got around really quickly. It went everywhere, and
it was horrible. Like when I got that email, I
just like my stomach dropped. I just felt so violated.
Take your time, and like the worst part was that
(04:01):
I had to tell my parents and it was like
going to my mom and my dad and saying, like,
I took a naked picture of myself and I sent
it to a guy, and to just tell them that
was the worst part about all of it. So I
end up calling all of my friends that knew him,
and I said, did he send you this picture? And
(04:24):
they were like, bro, code, I can't say anything, and
I have his back. And one of the one guy
he did say he did send it to me, and
so I knew it was him from this entire time.
And it didn't stop there. So it didn't luckily hit
the internet yet at that time, and so I was
(04:44):
getting um messages daily from people saying, Hey, is this you?
Is this you? Is this you? I didn't know them,
and it was horrible, Like to get these messages from Rhanna,
people you don't know and they've seen you in such
a vulnerable way. It was disgusting. And then they would
turn around on me, so when I finally confronted the
(05:05):
guy and I said, I can't believe he did this
to me. And he said, I'll never forget this. You
were the slut who sent it to me, of course,
and he said you deserved this, and he was like,
and you did, and you didn't even just send it
to me and sent it all these other guys. Well
they were getting it from all these other guys and
(05:25):
then claiming I sent it to them, and so is
this huge thing? And so I finally started to get
over it slightly a couple of months, but I still
get it every every single day I'd get a message
from some guys saying is this you? Is this you?
Is this you? And so I ended up playing in
this tournament in Dubai the second year, and right before
(05:48):
I had to go to a press conference. Well real quick,
so now you're you've gained a lot in popularity. That
are we jumping a little bit? Yeah, so we're jumping me.
So this is over like a four year span. So
the first section of the story was probably maybe like
six months. Okay, so this was after this was when
you were on your I just started like my yeah,
(06:08):
just at fresh out of college. Um, like six months
into it, and then um, like another like maybe another
six months or a year past, and this was still
kind of happening, but it wasn't It never hit the
internet and it wasn't like it was always there. But
it really wasn't that bad. But I was. I would
wake up every single day, I would check my phone
be like, Okay, am I gonna be on TMZ today?
(06:30):
Am I going to be here? Am I going to
be there? And that was like the worst parts, Like
I was constantly just so stressed out that like someone
was going to see it, and someone was going to
get in then it was going to get out. And
also like that was one picture. I don't know what
else he had or what he was going to release
or all of this other stuff. Like if he did
it once, he could do it again and again and
again and again. And I knew this guy for years,
(06:54):
so it was broken. And the worst part are about
all of it is I sent some really good stuff
and he picked that picture of like that picture is
the one you wanted to do? Like that was the
worst part about all of it now, But you, yeah,
(07:15):
how did your parents respond in that moment? So I
have really wonderful, like supportive parents, and they were like, okay,
like we're going through this, we understand, that's just kind
of how it is. And they were like, we don't
want to look at it. And I was like, like,
it's not that bad. My dad was so sweet, and
he was like, I really don't mean this in like
(07:36):
a weird, creepy dad way, but like it was tasteful,
like it could have been worse, and I and they
were just trying to say like anything they could to
make me feel better. And the picture really wasn't that bad. Um.
I'm sure a lot of you guys have seen it. Um,
but I was wearing you know, like um underwear or
panties as we like to call them now sometimes sometimes,
(07:57):
and then I had a open jean shirt and I
just had one breast exposed. So it really wasn't that bad.
But it was still the fact that they, you know,
violated my trust and they broke my trust and it
was just such a big violation of my privacy and
that was the worst part about it. Wasn't actually the picture.
(08:17):
It was just that I sent this to one person
he ended up sending it to everyone, so um. Back
to Dubai so Um. I went back for my second year,
and five minutes before I had to go to a
press conference, I got multiple messages from someone saying, if
you don't send me money or if you don't send
me another naked picture, I'm going to blackmail you and
(08:40):
I'm going to release the photos this morning, right now.
And it was just horrible because I've just been trying
to like push this under the rug for such a
long time and I don't want to get out and
so I ended up doing that press conference and I wait,
real quick, So five minutes before the press conference, you
got the message, you didn't respond. I showed my team
(09:01):
and I was like, what what do I do to this?
And it wasn't him, No, it was some random person
who had the picture. How are these people? Are these
people getting ahold of you? So no through DM on
Instagram and they were just getting this like I send
it to you, you send it to your buddies, your
body send it to and so it just grows into
this huge thing and like um a club professionally even
(09:25):
posted on Twitter, and like people in the industry were
posting it and talking about it as if it was
a joke. And it wasn't a joke, and so it
was like five minutes before I went out, and I
was freaking out, like this is literally my worst nightmare,
Like I'm already trying to prove myself as a serious golfer.
Now I'm going to have this like titty picture out
there for everyone to see. And so I went to
(09:47):
the press conference and I lost it. I just started crying.
It's like, I just think about that moment because I
felt so wonderb all the cameras on me. And after that,
no one knew what was going on in my life.
No one knew the half of it. And not only that,
but I was struggling with a lot of anxiety obviously
(10:09):
because there's just so much going on in my life,
and then also depression, and so it's like this on
top of everything else. So no one knew, No one
knew any of this. So I was getting comments from
people saying, like, you're doing this to yourself. You deserve
those comments because you show cleavage on Instagram and you
know you over sexualize yourself and you deserve this, and
(10:32):
you have no right to claim that you're being bullied. Meanwhile,
I am being harassed and sent death threats and blackmailed
over this picture that this guy you know, oh, even
like we ruined my life over it, and no one
knew that. And so it's so hard to like sit
there and take it and how people think that I
was playing the victim when all of this was happening.
(10:55):
So let me, can I just go back? All right?
So the press conference, you just broke down, right, you
just now broke down talking about that, right, So tell
me did you say did you say anything of the
press conference or was that just a moment where you
finally cracked. I just I think I just cracked. So
the year before too, where I played that tournament, I
received a sponsor exemption and I received a lot of
(11:17):
hate because of that, and um, a lot of people
are saying that I only got it because of the
way I look and I took someone else's spot and
I was receiving death threats and people were saying I
was horrible for golf and a bad role model and everything.
And so I came back again to this tournament to
prove myself. Yet the same thing happened all over again,
being bullied to the point where like I didn't want
(11:38):
to go play did the press talk to do, did
anything anyone in the press or during that conference news
conference say anything. No one publicly mentioned it in an
interview or anything. Um, but it was still something that
I was always so scared someone was going to ask
about it or they were going to bring it up.
(11:58):
And so I would talk to my friends on tour
and I'm like, like, have you seen it? And They're like, yeah,
we've all seen it. Everyone has seen it. And the
thing that was the worst about it, and I still
get it to this day, it was that guys were
using that picture as proof of sleeping with me and
that never happened. These were guys I didn't even know.
(12:20):
And I would meet, you know, someone and be like, oh,
you dated my friend so and so, and I'm like no,
They're like they have this this picture of you, like
I never even met them, and and I that was
the most frustrating part is that people were using that
against me again and painting me out to be this
person that I'm not. I just sent one picture to
(12:41):
a guy that I really really cared about, and I
just did it because I wanted him to like me.
That's the worst part, of course. And so I ended
up playing in a tahoe at They have a huge
celebrity event there, yeah Edgewood, and so I played. It
was my first time playing. I was really nervous, and
I you they always have like a bunch of people
(13:03):
and they bring you you know, like pictures, magazines, whatever,
and you sign autographs. And so there was a guy
who was there the first two days really nice to me.
I spent a lot of time talking to him and
what didn't seem weird or anything. So the next day
he pulled me up. He said, hey, Page, I really
need you to sign something. And so I walk up.
There's so many people around, like lines of people, little kids,
(13:25):
and he whips out a blown up picture of my
nude and he said, can you sign this for me?
It's for my personal use, and I lost it. I
lost it. I I just stood there and started bawling.
And the security guards like what happened? What happened? And
(13:45):
I just couldn't, like I was paralyzed again with fear,
and like it's just I can never escape the picture.
It's always there, and it's still it's still didn't hit
the internet yet, and so again it's like these little
things kept happening where I was like, Okay, I think
I'm over. Maybe a month pass and it's brought up again,
and it's brought up again. It's brought it up again,
(14:07):
and it keeps always reminding me also of this guy
and like what he did to me, and just all
the traumas, like every single life event also was tied
into that, which was also super traumatic for me. And
then so a couple of months pass, and for the
longest time, my biggest goal was to get Sports Illustrated
swim soon. That's the one thing I really wanted to get.
(14:27):
And so I get a call and I got it.
Ten minutes later, I get a call from my agent.
Your picture hit the internet. It was everywhere. So I
had to reach out to all of my partners to
Sports Illustrated say like, this is what happened, Like I
haven't knew what it's out there, and luckily none of
them dropped me. But it's like, it's so sad that
(14:48):
I had to like being in that position, like I
was my fault. It was my fault that I put
myself in this position, and now I have to apologize
for what this guy did to me. I think you're
being I mean, it's such a deep wound that that
you're when you say it's your fault. I know what
you're doing. You're owning the story because you you do
own what you did to to to send that nude
(15:11):
to your boyfriend. I mean, I know what you're saying,
but fault is should be the last thing we're talking about.
This is just this is not only betrayal, it's just
it's deliberately um uh uh uh manipulated. You've been manipulated.
And they made me feel so horrible about my body
for such a long time to like I felt so ashamed,
(15:34):
like I didn't even want to look at myself in
the mirror. I didn't feel like sexy and none of it.
I just didn't want to see I didn't want anyone
to see me that way. But then also on the
flip side, it made me so angry that I didn't
care what I was doing with my body too, So
I just had this like I don't care, like whatever,
guys are just gonna do whatever, and like I just
(15:55):
wasn't proud of the person that I was becoming. And
it was all just because of like this and what
that happened to me. So it was. It was just
the whole thing has just been like really difficult. Obviously,
this is a really heavy conversation, like as a female
to female. It's such a male dominant sports sports industry
and it's very conservative. So how did you how did
(16:19):
you navigate? Did you feel like you to navigate those
conversations in a certain way or did you feel like
you have to put on a sade of like this
is my body, I'm fine, I'm I'm so comfortable with
my body that I honestly don't care about it when
you were talking to you know, the fellow golfers, and
then how did you navigate that? As a Yeah, I
think when I would post, my message is always like
(16:39):
body positivity and love yourself. But and it was I
wear what I wear and it's okay to be sexy.
But on the inside, I was so confused and I
didn't know like what I stood for what was going on.
And it is really difficult because I would walk into
a PGA Tour event and I'm like, they have all
seen me naked, all of them, and they're so fake
(17:01):
to my face that they won't even say anything about it.
And they all shared it to each other and no
one can apologize, No one can say I'm sorry that
I did this and I sent to someone else. I
actually have a really important, important to me follow up question.
But what what? What the thing is is is it's
it's easy to blame page right. And also, let's also
(17:26):
think about it. She is the focus of all the
attention on it either way. The guy that did it,
he is, he is the weasel, and and the the
thing that works is the men. Men work on a
low common denominator and a high common denominator, right, and
when they can be when they when they can have
(17:46):
something that they can brag about, they'll go to the
lowest common denominator because that will get the most people. Right.
If you throw it out there that guy sent it,
let's just say that that weasel sent it to a
hundred people. I guarantee you. To one of them said
you're a dick. I'm guarantee you. But it doesn't matter
because the eighty are louder, because the eighty now have
(18:07):
something to do, now have something to take to their friends.
So how how how can that be? It's real easy.
It's been happening since the first day of time, right,
because that's the high road. Is the high roads hard
because you have to use moral courage. And I think
that people thought I would be okay with it because
I do have more of like a sexy image and like, oh,
(18:29):
it's like what's womboo? What's womb boo? But they just
like they're losing the whole message behind it. And the
person that I am on social media is not actually
who I am, And a lot of people just don't
know a lot about my personal life because I don't
choose to share a lot of small details. I'm very open,
as you guys know, Like I don't mind sharing a
lot of things, but there's a lot of stuff I
do like to keep to myself and my naked body
(18:52):
was one of them, and that was taken away from me.
But it should never be behind closed doors. Like just
because that's your platform doesn't mean that everybody has a
right to your platform. You know, it's like you're getting
catfish by somebody else's photos and you're got to meet
up with the person. It's not then you don't have
a right for that photo. That there's nothing is justified
behind that. You're completely lying, you're being shady and manipulative.
So I just I think that's the problem with you guys.
(19:15):
This is a digital problem too. I mean, like, no, sorry,
it's not a it's not a digital problem. It's just
enhanced tenfold by by all the social media. I'm sorry
it is. What doesn't make sense to me is that
these guys are asking for these pictures correct, Like they
they're they're like, hey, can you send me this? Or
why anyone seen hey getting a group with Hey? I could?
(19:39):
I could get it? Yeah, I'm sure. I swear to god,
I haven't seen it, and I won't. I swear to
god I've never seen it and I've never looked for it,
but I know I could get it. You could get
in a second. But right now, here's the thing. It's like, Okay,
girl sends you nude, that's a good thing. Why would
you break that trust? Why would you do that? Like
it's so stupid that they want to share that with
(20:00):
other friends, like we all got boobs, Like it's not
that big of a deal when you think about it's
like why why did they do that? And then the
guys never get in trouble for it. I have a question,
and Josh, maybe you can help me, when does the
male brain change their perspective on like woman being their
badge of honor, or of a moment like that, like
if you have kids. So, hearing her story, I'm sure
(20:24):
there was a point where you're in the locker room
and things happen. Not saying you ever partook in it,
but you know you're definitely environment No, no, no, And
I had and no to be to be fair, Yeah,
I've I've said some things I've been ashamed of as
a do right, So what is that as a woman?
We like, we do that too, I agree, but I
think there's there there's a different level. We're talking about
(20:47):
this level right now, and then no one wants to
see a dick exactly. It's very true. Um, but so
when when did it We've already discussed dickpas, we don't
like them, but when did it change for you as
a man? Weren't Do you realize there is almost an
abuse here talking about women in this level and I
want to be held to a higher standard. Okay, Um, well,
(21:07):
I can remember times when I said, WHOA, I got
to clean it up. And actually it started as early
as high school. It started as early as high school
because I My best friend in high school was a girl,
and I heard people guys on the team that I
(21:28):
was with talking and talking about her, and I'm just like, wow,
you know, if they were talking about some other girl,
I probably would have just listened or whatever, or maybe
even chimed in with a good joke or something. But
it was my best friend. I was like, Oh, hey,
motherfucker's that's not okay. That doesn't mean I was cured
(21:48):
in high school, but that that relationship, that good relationship
I had with a female at that age helped out right,
and that there was a mutual respect with that friendship. Well, now,
I always think like once you have like a daughter
or you're married, right, But I'll get messages from these
guys sending me this picture and I'll look at their
profile and they have like two daughters, and I'm like,
(22:11):
why would you? Why would you do that? And like
the thing too that was really confusing that the guys
that were slut shaming me, they sent me dick picks,
unsolicited dick pics, and I had them like in my phone.
I'm like, you did the exact same thing I did,
But why is it okay when you do it? And
then it's a horrible thing when I do it. So
let me ask you another question I have, I have
like ten, but this that just hit me on another one.
(22:33):
Do you ever feel like taking control of that and
sending that to taking the dick pics that they're doing
because they know they're almost counting on secrecy, right, they're
almost counting on you're not saying anything. Have you ever
thought of doing something with that? No? Because then I'm
just as sh as they are. So for me, like
winning in my mind was taking control of my body.
(22:54):
So I ended up doing sports ill straight swimsuit and
I had again a very emotional interview. You guys are
going to knows about me. I cry a lot, So
I'm gonna cry a lot on this podcast, so bear
with me. I'm always gonna cry. So I end up
having a very emotional interview where I talked about owning
my body, and again no one understood why I was
(23:15):
talking about that because of they didn't they didn't understand
the whole journey that I had with this picture. So
I was doing this interview and I was talking about,
you know, loving my body, owning my body, and in
one of the shots, I did this um I had
a couple of topless shots. But when I was just
wearing like this fish net material over my chest and
I was I was laying down and I was that
(23:36):
was nude. You know, I was completely naked, and that
was like the best moment for me. I felt so
empowered and I was like, Okay, if I'm gonna do this,
I'm doing it on my terms and I and I
took it back. I took my body back, and that
was the moment I won right there, when I had
Sports Illustrated swimsuit and I had my tips out. And
that was four years later, yeah, four years And now
(23:57):
let me ask you, is that it's it? That was
I think that was the moment where I finally got
over it. Yeah. I was like I did it, Like
I won. What he did. He thought he was going
to like ruin me, and I turned that into a positive.
And now I'm a Sports Illustrated swimson model and you
can never take that away from it. I did have
(24:27):
another question, and you can tell me if you don't
want to answer this one, But earlier on when we
were when we were rolling on this, you said you
did you say you weren't taking care of your body,
or it caused you to not take care of your
body or hurt your body. I think not in where
I was self harming, but more just maybe um, I
don't want to say being like promiscuous, but I wasn't
(24:50):
giving myself enough respect. So that was with the way
guys were treating me. So I went through this period.
Um it was right after college, kind of ryan when
the picture happened to be about two years and I
I had no self respect. I didn't like if a
guy mistreated me, I thought it was my fault. And
(25:10):
I would still I would still send them pictures because
I thought my my only worth was my body and
they wanted to see that and I had nothing else
to offer. And I think that was like the worst
part for me because I know how much I'm worth
now and I know that I'm like, I'm smart, and
I'm funny and I'm all these things. But back then,
I only thought that my body would get me attention
and and guys only like me for that reason, and
(25:32):
so I I hated that. And I think that's how
young girls feel like in middle school and in high
school because they guys make them. They play these like
messed up mind games. You said that in my stomach
turns took me back. Yeah, because they'll be like, um,
(25:52):
I'm having I would be like, oh, I'm having a
bad day, and I'll make I want to make you
feel better, how to make you feel better? And they'll
be like, you know what to do? And then it's like, well,
I don't want to do that, and then they don't
stop talking to you, and so you feel like you
have to then send a picture to get that attention again.
And so they kind of like play these games with
you to get you to do this, and then once
you do it, they got it, they share it, and
(26:13):
then you feel even worse about yourself and you're slut
shamed and like that was the worst part for me,
And I think that's why I was the most ashamed
about all of this, was that I thought my only
my worth was only my body and no one was
gonna like me for anything more than that. Okay, so
I don't you know I have a daughter. Yeah, so
and there's either there's guys with daughters listening right now,
(26:37):
or there are the daughters listening. I think, what would
you do if I was your fifteen year old daughter?
And I said I sent a nude picture and this
guy shared it. Yeah, and probably would want to kill
the guy first, and then I'd find the guy. Oh no, listen,
I would try and find the guy. I honestly would.
Um My, I without you know, with with keeping my
(27:00):
daughter's privacy and stuff. I there's there's stuff like that
that we have to I'm dealing with right now with
her and and social the snapchat and all that, you know,
all of the things that are going on right now.
And she's she's a teenager. So you gotta breathe and
breathe and breathe because it's it's all new and and
(27:23):
we we we said two years ago or three years ago,
four years ago, anything you put on there, just count
on it always being on there forever now, any single
picture you take, and I'm sorry, I'm sorry because a
relationship that might be good, that one with the weasel
might have been good at some point, and unfortunately you
(27:46):
in in that relationship, you you got, you got burned
the hardest and idn't the thing I think back, and
it was never good. Okay, So PG, let's do this.
Then give me some things that come to your mind
that you would tell or guys like me with daughters
or the daughters that are listening right now, just and
take your time, and they don't have to be like
(28:07):
you know, they don't have to be ten commandments, but
just maybe pages ideas of what would be helpful, how
to feel strong enough to not do it. I think
I don't have kids, so obviously it's gonna be hard
for me to give the best advice because I don't
know how it is. But I would say, as a parent,
know that it probably is happening, and it probably already
(28:29):
has happened, and she or he might be too afraid
to come to you and tell you that you know,
they're sharing it already, and just be try to not
make it obviously awkward. It's going to be awkward, uncomfortable,
but just and don't be judgmental. Don't say whatever you
put out there's going to be there forever. We know that,
you know, like you send it and you you kind
(28:50):
of have that feeling like maybe I shouldn't have done that.
I shouldn't we know, but like be understanding and just
be a support system for them, you know. And I
think it's hard because a lot of parents don't really
understand how things work, especially like snapchat, and so in
our minds we think that it's something that you just
send to someone in a racist forever. You don't realize
(29:12):
that they can screenshot it, or they can record it
off of someone else's phone, they can do all these
other things. But I think just be really comforting to
them and also make sure they realize that it's not
it's not their fault, they're the victim in the situation,
and that they should be proud of their body no
matter what. I think, the naked body is beautiful and
(29:32):
it shouldn't be looked upon as something that is bad.
And if you are sharing it, be strong about it,
Like you looked amazing in that picture. That's why you
sent it because you looking hot. Own it and just
yeah I looked good. It sucks, yeah, but I look good.
Own your body and take it back. And I think
as a parent, like there are things you can do,
(29:52):
like you can go to the principle, or you can
talk to your child, or you can do all these
other things. But I think you need to go to
your kid for and tell them, like, be proud of
who you are and love yourself and love your body,
because I think that's the most important thing. Okay, And
let me just go back a little bit and that
what we're talking about is that it I want to
be clear that, especially to all the dad's out there,
(30:14):
that you did not you owned the picture to your
boyfriend and and that's not that's not any of that part.
The part of it that that you regret is that
that guy happened to be your boyfriend. So let me
ask you this. And you said you saw some signs
on on and now you know hindsight and let's hey, look,
(30:38):
we're not going to find the weasel, but let's let's
just talk a little bit about him. What are some
of those things that that sort of clicked afterwards? I
think if they belittle anything that you say and make
you feel like you're worth is only your body. So
if they say things like prove it to me or um,
I won't show any one, or you know, I uh,
(31:01):
I just want to tell you how good you look.
There's like things that they do. But it's not only that,
Like when they're trying to send you it. Look what
their focuses are they asking how your day is doing?
Do they care about you? Are they making an effort
to show you love and encouragement and support and other
things outside of just your body. I think if you're
seeing signs like I only want to hook up with you,
I'm only talking to you after you send me a picture.
(31:23):
I'm going to ignore you until you send me something. Um.
It's like almost their attention is a reward for you
sending the picture. So it's Manipulation is a big thing.
I think it's really hard to see it when you're
in it because you just want to seek validation from
someone else. I think if you are that person and
(31:44):
you feel like you need to prove yourself to someone
else and they're not the person for you, they should
love you and care for you and think you're the
most amazing person ever without ever seeing what you look like,
that is a gift to them. And that's just the
icing top of the cake. You are the real prize,
not your body. So let me. I'm actually want to
(32:05):
ask any of you women that want to answer this,
do you think that I mean? And when you say that,
it's it clicks in my head. That's classic manipulation. I've
seen it a million times. I've seen you know, I've
I've watched that happen. Do you think that young women
are more susceptible at a younger age or do you
(32:26):
think it's a personality type? Do you think it's a
where where do you think the most susceptibility, Like do
you think like a's seventeen to twenty or more vulnerable
to that kind of a dick or is it it
still goes on at twenty four or unfortunately goes on
Because the thing is, it's it's the it's rooted in
wanting your identity or to feel loved or to feel
(32:49):
special or to feel noticed um through a man or
through a significant other or a partner um. So you
really get wrapped up in those relationships. And that's why
I think you to constantly reroute your thought process being like, Okay,
you are not my life, You're not my identity. I
you have other hobbies, passions, whatever it may be, but
you still always have that soft spot when you are
(33:10):
dating another person that you want to feel like they're
number one and they want you and they want you,
and you feel so desired in that moment, like you
feel like, wow, I'm actually, like you know, doing something
that they're only getting and that makes you feel like
a really special connection, which I think maybe feels deeper
to the female versus the male. Oh yeah, And I
(33:30):
think it's also more on someone's personality. So I'm a
real people pleaser, and I will do anyone I'll do
anything to make someone like me and I want. I'll
go out of my way to do anything for you.
If you're having a bad day, I will drop everything
and be there for you. I'll get you what you need,
I'll bake you a cake. I'll do all of these things.
(33:51):
And so when a guy sees that in a female,
doesn't matter what age, they're gonna take advantage of it
and be like, Okay, well she's gonna do anything for me,
well then send me a nude, you know, And and
then I'll do it. I'll do anything for you. And
like I that's one thing I really I love about
myself because I think it makes me a very caring person.
But I also hated about myself because I'm at the
(34:13):
beck and call of all of these It's in the
wrong hand. Yeah, And so like when I was dating,
I would if he called me at one o'clock in
the morning for a ride, I would give him that
ride to another girl's place, you know, and it's like
I do all these things, and I think back on
I'm like, I am such an idiot, Like I didn't
see it. But I just want to do anything I
could to like prove that I was the loyal one.
(34:35):
I was the one who was going to be there
for him. I was going to, you know, be that
person he didn't care. I think it's not being the
nurturing um DNA in the female body, where we really
want to like nurture and be there and take care
of and so if you need to be taken care
of sometimes it can really go against you. Yeah. Sure,
(34:56):
I mean it's your biggest strength, that's also your biggest weakness.
I'm a big believer in your biggest strength also being
your biggest weakness. But also you you got to understand
with with the uh, not only UM, your emotional maturity
over a guy has got to be about a decade
at least UM, and that you want these things because
you want devotion and love and to be that one
(35:20):
person whereas we're so goddamn scared of our feelings period
that we just need I don't know where I'm happy.
I gotta but if I'm happy here, this works? So
how do I do you start here instead of here
and you start with your dick instead of your heart
or your head, right, because that's that calms calms, calms
(35:40):
you down, or or or makes you a man, or
makes you cool in front of other people, or or
or answers a whole lot of problems. And I don't
think it's like a man woman type of thing where
it's like all women are like this, are all men
are like I do think I've seen a couple of
my friends who are the complete opposite, and they don't
they don't care at all, and they've actually heard a
(36:01):
lot of guys in the process because they're doing the
same things that that guy did to me. And so
I think it is it comes down to like your
personality and just how you are and how you want
to receive love and what you're comfortable with, because a
lot of people aren't comfortable with actually being vulnerable and open,
and it's just easier to push people away instead of
taking that in and like knowing that if you open
(36:24):
up to this person, you might lose them and then
you're gonna be heartbroken, and it's easier just to have
that wall up and that guard and I've never been
that way. I've been the absolute opposite. Like when I
fall in love with someone, I fall so hard and
so fast, and I'm so I mean, I'm telling, you know,
all of these people I don't even know listening to
this podcast about my you know, deepest darkest secrets, the
(36:45):
most you know, traumatic times in my life. I just
I love to talk, I love to share, and I'm
just a very open, vulnerable person. And I would always
go for guys who had like the biggest guard up
and they were just cold designs. Well so in a way, though,
you are now taking it and owning it for yourself.
It's almost like you posting that picture of yourself and
(37:07):
owning it and coming from you. That's what this that's
what this episode is turning out to be. Is you
taking all of that and saying, Yep, this is what
I am. This is how you can manipulate me, but
I'm taking the power. You're not gonna yeah, And I
think that's why I had to tell this story finally,
because it was such a big part of my life
for the last you know, four or five years now,
(37:28):
and a lot of kind of memorable moments that people
seem to always recall back to revolved around the picture.
And yes I was emotional, and yes I said all
these things, but it was because I was being harassed
and blackmailed and sent death threats and like, um, my
privacy was being violated, and all of these things were
(37:50):
happening to me, and I was a victim of bullying.
That is bullying, That is cyber bulling at its best
right there, and that's happening to so many kids these days.
And I think my biggest advice to those kids if like,
if you are a parent and you have a kid listening, um, no,
you're worth I think that's the biggest thing. Right. It
(38:12):
still sucks, and it still sucks that it's out there
and that everyone can see it and that they can
do whatever they want with it. And that is so
scary for me, and I know I'm gonna have a
lot of anxiety until this comes out. But my main
focus and the reason I wanted to do this podcast
is wanted to give people a better look into my
(38:33):
life and things that I have gone through. But the
biggest thing is to help people to make a difference,
to have a voice, because that's how when I went
into golf. I wanted to make a difference because I
never felt like I fit in and I want to
talk about things in golf that were a problem for me.
And I realized that I'm not I'm not powerful enough.
I don't have enough influence to actually create change in golf.
(38:55):
And so I feel like what I've done has been
for nothing, and so with this, it's for something. And
I think, I think so I think this is you
do have influenced Dammit, Page, thank you for all of that,
but you guys right in, Um, guys, girls, whatever, I
(39:15):
don't give a show some love right now because this
was a lot and this was painful and and and
women can share their their stories as well. Um, but
I'd like to hear both sides of it too. I like,
if you are a guy that you've shared a picture, um,
I want to know maybe why you did or what
your thought process around it would be. And then also
(39:35):
I think you being a parent can speak to this.
But this is a really big problem, especially with young
girls and like middle school and high school and how
how to handle it and if you've gone through it
and what to do with that, because I think that's
that's a really important conversation. Well, and I really appreciate it.
So look, I I have a daughter and she's in
high school, she's a teenager, right, and um, you you
(39:59):
all of this, all of this cybership was not even
around when I was. When I was, you know, growing up,
and then you've got kids and all of a sudden,
this is another thing that can happen to them. And
I'm you know, obviously the first thing I did is
as soon as she's ten or eleven, I say, anything
you put on the Internet is gonna end up there forever,
don't do it. Don't do it, don't do it. But
but like it's but the thing is, like that's that
(40:21):
doesn't make it happens happens, right, and your your your
daughters and your sons. They they they get to live
their own life and they get to make their own mistakes.
And I'm not saying, you know that it's gonna happen everybody,
but it's gonna happen to enough people that we have
to worry about this, we have to talk about this. Um,
I'm terrified for for my daughter's safety on seventeen different levels, Um,
(40:46):
all of which you're facing, you know, and whatever it
is on the internet, and whatever whatever it is physically
when when men are physically close to her, and and
and and when they think they can have a voice
with her, and so it does. And I gotta be honest,
like Page, I was not a saint growing up. I
mean I have done something that. I mean, none of
us are perfect. We've all made mistakes. Like and I
(41:07):
think a big thing too, it's like if you kids
need to know that if you're under age and you
have a picture of a girl or anyone that is
under age, you could go to jail for it. It's
a really big problem. And I don't think a lot
of kids in high school when they're sharing something realized that,
like they're going to end up in a lot of trouble.
(41:29):
So think twice about it before you share it. Like
it's on the other side too, it's it changed a
little bit when you obviously when you're over eighteen, and
then that's you know, it's a little bit harder to
get it off and the laws are a little bit
more blurred and it's weird. But when you are under
age and this happens, you are in huge trouble. So parents,
(41:51):
that's a great thing for parents that are listening, parents
that are listening, if you want to, if you're if
your high school kids, there's one thing to tell you
right now. If they get caught sharing any kind of
new for having even just having the picture on their phone,
you're gonna go, You're gonna get in a lot of trouble.
That's a great that's a great deterrent. But look, and
the other thing that I think the page is showing
me is that sometimes whether it happens or not, it happened.
(42:13):
She she she got she was betrayed, She she had feelings,
and she had vulnerabilities that allowed her to take this
this this photo. And I think that's going to happen
more often than it's not out there. So what what
what we what she's trying to spread And what I
think I'm picking up is that let's be kind to
to those mistakes. They're just mistakes like everyone else. It's
(42:34):
just it's just unfortunate that now they're there and quotations
forever on the internet. So um, and don't slut shame
the girl like that is just one thing that has
always really bothered me. Um, if it happens like just
don't talk about it, you know, like, don't slut shame
her for something that you asked for, Like you asked
(42:56):
her to do this and she did it because she's awesome,
and I mean everyone loves boobs. Like this is a
good thing, by the way, Yeah agreed, Like yeah, like
this is a good thing. Guys, Like, don't ruin a
good thing. Don't ruin it. But like if you say
something in passing, because maybe you're just trying to like
be cool with the guys, just trying not to slust
(43:18):
shame the girl, just don't do that. Like it ruins
a lot of things. Like I have had such a
weird relationship with like being comfortable with my sexuality and
like owning who I am and like feeling comfortable with
that because I've been slush shamed for like pretty much
since college until now, and like I just it's just
(43:41):
not fun. It's not fun to go through that. It's
not fun to think that people are saying these nasty
things about you all the time. Just like, don't do it. Heard,
that's lovely, as easy as that, And you know what,
you can always everyone's everyone's got a place in that
food chain. So whether you're not committing or being committed
against you can also help other people by partake. Partaking
(44:05):
You're you're brave and badass and I'm so girls, so
it's grateful that you drop that. Yeah, if you've gone
through this, or guys, if you've known someone about this,
please just send me a comment like, I'm here to talk.
I'm here to be an ally for you. UM, I
really want to hear from you. I want to be
someone that you guys can talk to. So I'm here
(44:28):
where where PG come on? Drop it. You can email
me at p A R at I heart radio dot
com and don't forget to follow us on Instagram at
Playing Around podcast and also my personal Instagram which is
page Renee. Um. You can send messages to either of them.
Probably better to send them either to the email or
(44:50):
the UM podcast UM Instagram account just because I can
see those a little bit easier and better, and we
got people reading those, yes, so UM, they'll let me know.
But I I want people to know also that I'm
going to personally read them and respond to them because
that's something that I've always wanted to do, is to
connect with my followers. And so, UM, if you just
(45:12):
don't feel comfortable sending it or wanting it to be
discussed on the podcast, or in any way. You could
always send me a personal message and I will right back.
I control all of my all my social media, but
especially my Instagram accounts, so when you get a response
from me, my verified account, it's from me. And so
I want people to know that I will respect their privacy.
(45:33):
And if it's something that you're uncomfortable with or that
you're not quite ready to share, but to me, just
know that, like I will, I'll have your back. I'll
be there for you, and I'm there if you want
to talk. That's very liberating. I'm not gonna lie. I
feel so much better now. I I feel really great.
And this is just this is an episode for me
(45:54):
that I have wanted to talk about. This is one
of the main reasons why I wanted to have this podcast,
and so I just want to thank everyone for listening
to me talk about this and sharing my story because
this is something that has taken a long time for
me to come to terms with, not only just the picture,
but like myself as a person. So that's it. That's
(46:16):
that's Episode three. Guys, keep on listening. I have more
juicy drama, not just like SAP stories about my life,
which I actually do have a lot, so maybe we'll
talk about that next one. Um, but I have a
lot of really fun stuff and if you like this,
there's definitely more to come. And don't forget to subscribe,
Like we're just like putting it out there, barriers to break,
(46:38):
that's what you're gonna do. Well, thank you Josh for
listening to me, Tory. It was great. We're here for you,
all right, Subscribe, come back, follow playing around with Page
Renee on IR Radio, or subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts.
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