I Say, I Say, This Here Beauty Pageant Is Rigged!

For many folks, beauty pageants feel like part of a bygone era of 'big hair, don't care' femininity. But Zaron is here to set you straight on that score. Beauty pageants are still very much a thing... and they've got crime a-plenty! Allegations of bribery and hijinks! And also, Steve Harvey! So you know it's bound to get loose. This week it's a bubbly bevy of beauty pageant scandals!

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Ridiculous crime. It's a production of iHeartRadio.

Speaker 2 (00:03):
Elizabeth does Zaren Burnette. So good to see you, my friend.
How are you being so good?

Speaker 3 (00:08):
To see me too? I am feeling so much better
than I have.

Speaker 2 (00:12):
You sound good? Do you sound like you feel better?

Speaker 3 (00:14):
Yeah? I think I might have for the rest of
my life a slight graveliness. But hey, I can make
it work. I think I've recovered. I can breathe. So anyway,
enough about me.

Speaker 2 (00:27):
Yes, how are you well? I'm find fine. Yeah, it
doesn't matter, you know, it's ridiculous, I do what?

Speaker 3 (00:33):
Oh my goodness. Okay, so this We've heard a lot
about this one. This has been forwarded to me through
our various Oh no, no, no, I just have a really
quick question for you. I'll have you ever owned a
pair of Crocs?

Speaker 2 (00:49):
No? No, no, I mean nothing against people who do,
or the shoes themselves. It's just not my bag.

Speaker 3 (00:54):
It's just not your thing. My nephew has a sign
that he wrote for his door and that says no
shoes or crocs allowed, my boy. So they're not really
technically shoes the New Verse. Yeah, he's four rules anyway,

(01:14):
So crocs. This is a mash up, I know, And
like I said, the interns have been forwarded me from
every method of communication, so I can't nail it down
to who found this.

Speaker 2 (01:26):
First they tell you about how I like mean mug
them in the break room. I'm like, yeah, huh, I
know what you do.

Speaker 3 (01:32):
You're trying to log in and erase all that stuff.
So they told they told me about this. People are
losing it. It's Crocs have joined forces with Pringles, and
it says, I'll read the copy of come Together for
a fun collection that satisfies every flavor of fashion. So
they're the classic clog but they're like shiny, like glossy,

(01:56):
and they're mismatched. So one pair has read an orange
and the other has green and blue, like different colors.
And it says, so you don't have to choose between
your favorite flavors. That heel strap thing that you give
a converto strap that go back and forth backstrap action,
it's the shape of that the Pringles dude's mustache.

Speaker 2 (02:16):
Oh yeah right.

Speaker 3 (02:18):
And then it also it comes with like the what
they call gibbets charms. That's stuff that people stick in
the shoes. I've seen ones where it's like looks like
toes coming out. That's the only thing I indoors and
so anyway, glossy surface. They're incredibly light and fun to wear.
They say seventy dollars on the Croc's website.

Speaker 2 (02:36):
I don't know how much Crocks normally cost.

Speaker 3 (02:38):
I don't know either, but I've fifty dollars I suppose, so,
I mean it's fifty bucks is what it looks like
for just a standard. But then it gets worse.

Speaker 2 (02:49):
Sarin, Oh, really, I'm shocked.

Speaker 3 (02:52):
Because they came up with something else promising before the website.
When I tried to look at on the Croc's website,
it doesn't It's not there anymore. I think it either
got banned or sold out.

Speaker 2 (03:00):
They realized they made boots like croc boots. Yeah, how
does it even work? Do they have the backstrap?

Speaker 3 (03:06):
No, they're just boots, and so it says with Pringles
and Crocs Classic Crush Boot purchase. I don't know if
these are supposed to be used in crush fetish videos.
Buyers will also be eligible to receive Crocktail Party Flavor,
which is a new Pringles flavor which is PS watermelon

(03:27):
chili lime flavor. I don't know what happened there, but
it's a boot, right, Like, it's a Crocs material boot
that must get so sweaty because it doesn't have the
boot doesn't have the airholes. And then it comes with
a holster in the side, like a koozie on the
side that you slip the Pringles cannon like.

Speaker 2 (03:42):
An ankle holster on the outside of it looks.

Speaker 3 (03:45):
It looks like a home arrest ankle monitor, but you
put a Pringles can in it. Anyway, I know this
is going on way too long, but they got like
some of the biggest names really celebrity hood.

Speaker 2 (03:57):
Really name a big name Elizabeth.

Speaker 3 (04:00):
Ashley Simpson who's apparently married to some dude named Evan Ross.

Speaker 2 (04:05):
I don't know who he is, ross boy.

Speaker 3 (04:07):
And you know, they did like a sponsored content on
their Instagram of them wearing these absolutely hideous.

Speaker 2 (04:15):
Boots, Like, how are these okay?

Speaker 3 (04:17):
Sarah?

Speaker 2 (04:18):
It's ridiculous, Elizabeth. You want I'll flip it around. You
want to know what my favorite pringles mashup is?

Speaker 4 (04:23):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (04:23):
What's that?

Speaker 2 (04:24):
The guy who invented it had them bury him in
a Pringles can. He's like, yeah, I turned that into
my cast yet, so he has cremated put in the can.
They're like, let's do it.

Speaker 3 (04:32):
I like it.

Speaker 2 (04:32):
That's a mashup. That is all right, Well, you know
what's also death and pringles. What I'm going to tell
you today involves your close personal friend Steve Harvey, but
also Donald Trump and Vanessa Williams.

Speaker 3 (04:46):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (04:46):
Can you guess what all three of them happened? I
don't know the answer. Elizabeth beauty pageant scandals. Oh no,
some were criminal, all of them were ridiculous. This is

(05:17):
ridiculous crime A podcast about absurd and outrageous capers. Heice
and cons. It's always ninety nine percent orter free and ridiculous.
See signor Oh Elizabeth beauty pageants. Yeah they're wild right.
Oh yeah, I kind of guess that, but I had
no idea. So what do you remember the twenty fifteen

(05:38):
Miss Universe pageant?

Speaker 3 (05:40):
Is that the one when the wrong one got announced?
It was a La La Land situation.

Speaker 2 (05:44):
I'll give you a hint.

Speaker 3 (05:45):
Okay, black Steve Harvey.

Speaker 2 (05:47):
Yes, your close personal friend Steve Harvey was the host
of the twenty fifteen Miss Universe pageant.

Speaker 3 (05:52):
So the Steve Harvey thing with me is twofold. I
think I've mentioned on here that my trivia team is
Steve Harvey Oswald. Yes. And then also my brother does
a really good impression of Steve Harvey saying OK. And
then I do an impression of my brother doing the impression, and.

Speaker 2 (06:09):
Then I do an impression of you doing an impression
of your brother doing an impression of Steve Harvey.

Speaker 3 (06:12):
And then sometimes producer Dave does he.

Speaker 2 (06:14):
Impression it's a game metallic phone.

Speaker 3 (06:16):
Yeah, so it's it's there are a lot of impressions
going around.

Speaker 2 (06:19):
Well, your close personal friend Steve Harris, he was supposed
to announce the winner, right and you were right there
with a la la land mix up. He proclaimed it
was Miss Columbia Ariadna Gutierrez right now, it was not,
because it doesn't matter. He walks off the stage. Producers
come up to him tell him he flubbed the call.
So Steve Harvey right, what does he do? He marches

(06:40):
his mustache right back out on him in the giant suit,
and he says, I have to apologize, and then he
went silent for a long awkward moment. Standing there. People
are to look at Adham like, what's he apologize for?
What happened? Backstage, Steve, He's like, and then the first
runner up is Miss Columbia, Miss Philippines, take your first
walk as Miss You, And so he introduces the actual winner.

(07:02):
The actual winner was Miss Philippines, Pia Alonzo Wertzbock. Now
the reaction to Steve Harvey's primetime mistake, Elizabeth, you remember
it laughably outside right, Yeah, it was twenty fifteen, a
simpler time.

Speaker 3 (07:15):
Oh man, it really was.

Speaker 2 (07:16):
You can believe it now. One law firm in Colombia
went so far as to threaten to file a lawsuit
against the Miss Universe pageant. According to Miami Herald, they
claimed that, quote, the crown is an acquired right. They
cannot be taken away from us. It was like a flag.

Speaker 3 (07:31):
Plantic I you know what, file the lawsuits for it.

Speaker 2 (07:38):
Yeah. Now they took beauty pageants pretty seriously in Columbia, Elizabeth.
But more on that later. For now, back to your
close personal friend Steve Harvey. Yeah, Now here's how he
recalled how it went down. Here's the situation. Now, when
the mistakes was made, when I said the wrong woman's name,
I can only give information I had no one knows,
and that information is not in the teleprompter, because you've
got two women standing there. I read what was on

(08:00):
the teleprompter. Then I read what was on the card,
the difference being on the card it said first runner up.
Now what happened? How how it got like that, how
it was done, how it was worked on? That's neither
here nor there. I said the name that was on
the card. When I walked off, everything was cool, and
then after that all hell broke loose.

Speaker 3 (08:18):
Wait, let me nobody knows. I think everybody knows. You
didn't read, he says, just on the card, I know.

Speaker 2 (08:24):
Steve his thumb covered the answer.

Speaker 3 (08:27):
Oh, you're kidding me.

Speaker 2 (08:28):
There was two answers high and one answer low, and
he puts his dear one. Six years after the event,
Steve Harvey was still talking about it. He told a
podcast that it was the worst week of my life,
the worst week of This man used to be homeless,
living in a car before he made it big as
a comedian. Say yeah, worst.

Speaker 3 (08:47):
I'll take that as the worst week of a life.
If you can say that, all.

Speaker 2 (08:50):
Right, host a family feud. He also said it was
a painful night there dog. Oh god, I don't know
how the pain I was in I didn't know how
bad the mistake was, so it just lasted and lasted,
and as he recalled, I took my stupid back out there.
I should have let them announce it the next day
in the newspaper. I wouldn't have caught none of that.
Hell I caught Wait what? Yeah, He's like, I shouldn't

(09:13):
have gone exactly.

Speaker 3 (09:15):
Oh my god, what.

Speaker 2 (09:16):
Kind of hell did he catch? Elizabeth? Great question, Elizabeth.
Steve Harvey received a deluge of harassment from people all
around the world because Miss Universe has contestants from all
the countries, right.

Speaker 3 (09:27):
So did you get in on that?

Speaker 2 (09:29):
No? And I just have his phone number, so I
just texted him. I don't bother.

Speaker 3 (09:33):
You're like, I'm just disappointed, and come on, man, Reno,
what happened?

Speaker 2 (09:38):
Now? People's getting emails, tweets, people posted on all the
social media's. They're also writing him in handwritten obscene letters
in any different languages.

Speaker 3 (09:48):
Let's get into that. Let's sending people handwritten I.

Speaker 2 (09:52):
Want to receive them, you want to send them, I
want to receive them. So the funniest part is how
the same thing happened to Steve Harvey twice. So he
goes back he's still the host. Twenty nineteen, he makes
the same blunder.

Speaker 3 (10:04):
Again again, and then people were tired of it. That's
why we didn't hear about it.

Speaker 2 (10:07):
Oh no, wait, it just wasn't as fresh. Yeah, but
again it involved the contestant, Miss Philippines. Don't know what
it is with her, but Steve Harvey's on stage a
photo Miss Philippines is shown as if prompted, Steve Harvey declares,
this is it right here now he announces the winner,
who was a contestant standing beside him, but was clearly
not the same woman who's just shown on the screen.
Steve Harvey tells the crowd at the Miss Universe pageant,

(10:29):
let me let me explain something to you. I was
just reading that in the teleprompter. Y'all gotta quit doing
this to me. I can read right now. They are
trying to fix it. Now. See this is what they
did to me back in twenty fifteen, played me short
like that happened, like a little Steve Harvey moment.

Speaker 3 (10:46):
It's one of those if you have to say, I
can read, It's like, I'm not crazy. You've reached the.

Speaker 2 (10:50):
Point, and you know he's like he's kind of a
heard on his assistant. There's stories about him. Yeah, so
imagine that this happened twice. Though things all get sorted out.
You can't keep a king of comedy down from Elizabeth.
He's a kang. So this brings us to our next
big name in pageants, Donald Trump. From nineteen ninety six

(11:11):
to twenty fifteen, Donald Trump owned the Miss USA pageant,
also the Miss Teen USA contestant, and their sister pageant,
Miss Universe. He saw the pageants just before he ran
for president. Now, if you're like me, Elizabeth, you may
not know about the pageant taxonomy. I did not. Yeah,
there's Miss America, Miss USA, and Miss Universe. Two of
these are related. Miss USA is a sister pageant to

(11:33):
Miss Universe. As I just said, the winner of the
Miss USA beauty pageant goes on to compete for Miss Universe.
So Miss USA competes against Missus Columbia or Miss Missus,
Miss Columbia, Miss Thailand, Miss Yo Argantina.

Speaker 3 (11:46):
When Steve Harvey messed up in twenty fifteen, that was
Donald Trump's pageant. Interesting.

Speaker 2 (11:51):
Yeah, so I know, like it's weird. You can go
from like basically regional Miss USA to Miss Universe. There's
no missus World right or Miss North America. They kind
of skipped like the whole global thing. But I guess Miss.

Speaker 3 (12:06):
World's little hemisphere underwhelming.

Speaker 2 (12:08):
Maybe it sounds like kind of a WWE title, like
oh we got Miss Love. Yeah, there you go. If
you win Miss Usa, you work as a beauty ambassador, right, that's.

Speaker 3 (12:19):
Your jokes, like you work as his beauty consultant alta.

Speaker 2 (12:23):
The winner. Also, they received cash for their duration of
their reign, and they get a modeling portfolio, so lots
of photos taken. They receive free beauty products from all
these sponsors and companies they partner with. They get free clothes,
they get free shoes. They also receive free healthcare, so
there's one way to get healthcare in America. Win a
beauty patch, yes, so you know what. Miss USA also
used to win a free apartment in the Trump Place

(12:44):
apartments in New York, but the apartment was not all
hers alone, though she had to share it with Miss
teen Usa and Miss Universe. Going Trump ideas, He's gonta
three beauty queens sacks shaped up in one apart in
one of his buildings.

Speaker 3 (13:01):
Oh my god, there's so much I want to say.

Speaker 2 (13:04):
Anyway, we haven't talked about the actual pageant. So contestants
they get judged in various competitions. There's the interview competition
section where they're all answered to a series of questions,
judge on their answers. Also there's the swimsuit competition, and
of course the evening gown competition. Miss USA was the
second major beauty pageant. It was inspired by and a
reaction to, Miss America.

Speaker 3 (13:24):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (13:25):
The first competition for women, being Miss America, starts in
nineteen twenty one, but it was a bathing beauty review.
It quickly becomes this tourist event for Atlantic city beach goers.

Speaker 3 (13:34):
Oh okay, but that wasn't.

Speaker 2 (13:36):
The first one. There's actually a previous Miss America. And
then the first Miss America is actually called the Fall Frolic.
It gets confusing, but here's how it works out. Let's
just focus on an example of Miss America and then
I'll sort out all the details of history. Okay, do
you know who is the most famous Miss America of
all time?

Speaker 3 (13:53):
Vanessa Williams being go Baby.

Speaker 2 (13:56):
That's right. Do you remember her and her scandal?

Speaker 5 (13:58):
Oh?

Speaker 2 (13:58):
Yeah, nineteen eighty three, Missed New York. The next year,
she wins the competition to become Miss America. Soon enough,
nude photos emerged over which were published in Penthouse. She's
subsequently stripped of her title in twenty sixteen, though Miss
America apologized to Vanessa Willis. Yeah, yeah, the very public apology.
Way to make her right, Miss America.

Speaker 3 (14:16):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (14:17):
Now, since there have been other scandals and outrages, but
none so damaging was what was done to Vanessa Williams.

Speaker 3 (14:22):
Yes, right, I couldn't name another Miss America exactly.

Speaker 2 (14:24):
It's very difficult. I couldn't think of one off of hand.
But not.

Speaker 3 (14:28):
Even with Miss USA or whatever that I have no
idea I see them advertising anything.

Speaker 2 (14:34):
They're not as big as they once were. No, but
they did so Vanessa Williams. She goes on to have
this brilliant career as a singer and an actress, so
she had the last one. Good for her and love
that Miss America. Though the organization and just the words
Miss America, they've become kind of a code to tweak
and mock your girl. Lana del Rey, she has that
song Miss America Trash. It's Miss America in the parentheses. Yeah,

(14:57):
did you do you know that song, what is it a?
You know? And it was one of her kind of
unreleased songs. I was having a hard time pinning down
when it came out. Yeah, So anyway, that one as
if the beauty pageant could feel, you know, derision and
how ridiculous it was. In twenty eighteen, Miss America introduced
Miss America two point zero. The idea was to quote
evolve Miss American in this cultural revolution. That cultural revolution was,

(15:19):
of course, the movement to me too. Oh yeah. In
reaction to this, gonna Miss America is gonna get right.
So one big change beauty contestants for Miss America would
no longer be judged on their physical appearance. It would
no longer feature a swimsuit competition. And that went about
how you would imagine, because in twenty twenty three Miss
America reverse course, they had new leadership, new folks were like, hey,

(15:41):
you know what, forget everything we said before. Miss America
is going back to swimsuits, baby whoo. So that seems
kind of common for a sudden social changes to traditions
and in response to outrage like it, like the from
the Bonfire of the Vanities to Miss America. We've seen
this over and over again. It remains true. The change
only lost as long as the anger and the passion
are aroused. Anyway, soon as the shouting cools, it's back

(16:02):
to boobs and profits.

Speaker 3 (16:03):
Right.

Speaker 2 (16:04):
So now, I'm not here to make fun of beauty pageants, Elizabeth,
that'd be too easy. That's my job. I've researched them.
I've got all this, Ammo. But you stay hot, Let's
take a break and we get back. We're going to
get into it, all right, Elizabeth zaren So. As I

(16:37):
told you, I'm doing all this research because I don't
know the world of beauty pageants at all.

Speaker 3 (16:41):
All I know about beauty pageants is that Toddlers and
TR's TV show.

Speaker 2 (16:46):
Oh my god, that was gonna mention.

Speaker 3 (16:48):
Really, I mean, I'm saying, like, let's pretend I watched TV.

Speaker 2 (16:52):
Of course, of course you don't watch TV, but.

Speaker 3 (16:54):
You did, you would watch That would be my point
of reference.

Speaker 2 (16:58):
Do you know they like you? Probably well know or
maybe don't. They have three year olds competing on this show.

Speaker 3 (17:04):
With like fake teeth.

Speaker 2 (17:05):
Yes, there was one episode there's a three year old
who was dulled up as a sex worker, specifically Julia
Roberts Street look pretty woman. Yeah with the fish. Yeah, everything.
Now I've seen the images. At all I can say
is wow, parents, Wow, come on now, So you're familiar.

Speaker 3 (17:22):
With this show, familiar with the show Cupcake hands, the
whole business.

Speaker 2 (17:26):
Oh my god, Sarah, Sarah, okay show.

Speaker 3 (17:31):
Yeah, and then we walked away from reality television. I
don't like it anymore.

Speaker 2 (17:36):
You guys are over. You guys should get into like
Korean sports like me. Okay, Yeah, anyway, listen, I'm gonna
make the case that beauty pageants are actually super feminist. Okay, yeah,
you're ready.

Speaker 3 (17:48):
Yeah, I'm ready for anything.

Speaker 2 (17:49):
Okay, I'm not actually gonna make that case, but I will.
I will repeat what other people have said in a
very convincing voice. Okay, did you know that beauty pageants,
that there were beauty pageants in America before women in
America had the right to vote.

Speaker 3 (18:02):
Yeah, sure, of course, but only by months.

Speaker 2 (18:05):
You know, it wasn't like like a long time. It
wasn't like eighteen twenty women are in beauty pageants. But
you could see it.

Speaker 3 (18:09):
Right, I could totally see it. And you know, like
there are a lot of things too that we could
loosely call beauty prosents.

Speaker 2 (18:14):
Totally, No, for real, it would be some of these
those like county fair contests, you know, like cakewalks and stuff,
essentially become beauty pateants. Anyway, first Miss America contest, the
one that I mentioned earlier, took place on February first,
nineteen nineteen. Now, the Nineteenth Amendment, which gave American women
the right to vote was passed on June fourth, nineteen nineteen.

Speaker 3 (18:32):
It's like Susan B. Anthony and the gals are doing
some heavy lifting over on one side, and then we
got the other ones parading around and they're underthings.

Speaker 2 (18:40):
It takes all kinds, Elizabeth two wings to flap a bird.

Speaker 5 (18:44):
Right.

Speaker 2 (18:45):
So the next year, the first official Miss America event
takes place, unrelated to this first one, that was the
one that the second one was called the Fall Frolic.
This one was more reasonably taking place September twenty fifth,
and it was in the tourist haven of Atlantic City.
So out from the very beginning, these pageants were seen
and treated as feminist events. I swear to goodness the
beauty pagans the definition of the day. Sure, yes, they didn't.

(19:08):
They couldn't have future mind didn't look back. So when
they were by their definitions.

Speaker 3 (19:12):
These ladies are allowed to walk alone.

Speaker 2 (19:14):
This is how they hyped it. There's reasons too, the
legitimate reasons I looked into it. Right, So, the beauty
pageants and these bathing suit competitions, that was one means
of celebrating a woman, but also they were designed to
show off the new talents that women were learning as
professional women following the First.

Speaker 3 (19:29):
World War, right, walking in high heels.

Speaker 2 (19:31):
Well, obviously it didn't take long for the pageants to
devolve into what we think of them as now, swimsuits
and big hair. Yeah, so women's intelligence and her skill set,
they were obviously sidelined very quickly. Over time, beauty gets
pushed as the most important value, and what had started
as this feminist exercise kind of devolves into an anti
feminist exercise between the wars. Now here's where I have

(19:54):
to turn it over to the competitors for a little
more insights. Okay, because what I found wall was researching
this topic is that beauty pageant contestants always point out
the sisterhood. They feel right, and they seem to legitimately
mean this right. It is, isn't that like one of
the true goals of feminism that these women feel empowered
in a sisterhood and like have each other's back, not
just like in a sense of like, oh, I have

(20:14):
your back in theory, but like really to have each
other's backs and like, you know.

Speaker 3 (20:17):
Being there, Let's join together to court the male gaze.

Speaker 2 (20:20):
Well, just create, foster and protect a sisterhood. We'll say, right, Elizabeth,
I take you to the annual Your Highness Grandmother pageant.

Speaker 4 (20:27):
Your Highness Grandmother, Okay, every senior women of the Russian
speaking neighborhood of Brighton Beach ok aka Little Odessa, they
come together to compete for the title of your Highness Grandmother.

Speaker 2 (20:39):
Now, starting in the nineteen seventies, immigants from the Soviet
Union they start flooding in all the different republics, right,
they start settling in Brighton Beach, So it becomes one
of the most populous enclaves, I think, the most populous
enclay of the Russian speakers outside. Yeah, they were in
the US. We'll just say right now, for this contest,
a dozen or so grandmothers they compete in the beauty pageant.
The judges are all grandfathers, so it's even stage appropriate. Yes, exactly.

(21:02):
That you have to be a grandfather to be a judge.
So what did these grandfather judges look for? Is one
judge put it optimism, these pursuit of happiness and very
important support from family. Okay, so yeah, Now when he
says support from family, he's talking about an insane amount
of love for the grandmothers. Like some families charter buses
so they can bring in everybody in.

Speaker 3 (21:20):
The family on.

Speaker 2 (21:22):
They shout and clap the gut homemade signs. Right. The
judges are like, oh, yes, we love this because, as
the guy said, and I quote, they're supposed to see
that the babushka is not an old lady in a
bathrobe preparing the lacas or kathlets that are bashka are
colorful people, full of life. Right. Oh bah.

Speaker 6 (21:39):
The contests are split into two groups right over and
under seventy seven that's the divide with and so yeah,
if you're wonder Elizabeth, there's no swimsuit competition. Instead, the
beauty pageant is about, as the judge explained, the overall
beauty of the person inside the that. Yeah, so the
beauty pageant was started as a response to American culture.
So these Soviet Union people, well some of them bobbous,

(22:01):
have predated the original ones to get in the seventies.
They predated like you know, the revolution. So we got
multiple views, some sor some Soviet, but some older women.
They arrive and as the founder of this group, Risa
Tcherannina said, quote, my mom would watch a lot of
American TV talent, showed competitions like America's Got Talent, and said,
one day, what can we do for grandmothers? Right, so

(22:22):
she obviously she starts this in the nineties or I
guess the early odds. So Raisa, she created a beauty
contestant for women. Women spend about a month preparing for
this pageant. They perform three tasks in competition, just like
kind of like Miss America and the others. So one
is a performance we're in the women in the past
they've done usually like a song or dance from your youth.

Speaker 3 (22:40):
Okay. When you first started telling me, I thought that
this was happening in like nineteen ten or whatever.

Speaker 2 (22:47):
This is a recent yeah, okay. So now there's also
there's a costume contest where women create a traditional costume
and then finally there's an unexpected challenger test, because life's
gonna throw you unexpected challenges or tests. I guess.

Speaker 3 (22:59):
Wow.

Speaker 2 (23:00):
One example of a challenge was roller skating, So they
got always like older ladies out there, and that you've
kind of held dangerous for a population that's with broken Yeah,
the risk of danger, yeah, but hey, I like the spirit,
you know, ladies. Yeah, and you know I'm always gonna
be on team roller blades, so hey, get you some
skate babies. Anyway, My favorite part of all this was
when the founder Risa admitted that in past years, grandmas

(23:20):
have tried to bribe the judges. Yeah, like a grandma
allegedly passed some boudoir style photos to a judge to
kind of curry some favor, Like, hey, well, do you
think Alexis Risea put it laughingly? Of course they want
to bribe the judges since day first.

Speaker 3 (23:39):
That's amazing, since stay first, that's what she said.

Speaker 2 (23:42):
Boom. This brings us to the crime portion of today's episode. Bribery,
scandals and cheating right apparently mad common in the beauty
pageant world. I was looking around the world, Elizabeth, anywhere
I looked, I could find this from Spain to South Korea.
Was there Zimbabwe? Back to like Russia that was there,
South Korea will start. There was a ivory scandal for
Miss Korea. One of the contestants families allegedly bribed a

(24:04):
judge to give her daughter a leg up in the pageant. Right,
so like a mother, this mother, she gives money to
someone from the newspaper, the Korea Times. Like why the
Korea Times, Yeah, good question of Elizabeth. They are the host
of the pageant. So this newspaper puts it on investigation
is of course launched. A contestant from a prior year
confessed that one of the senior staff of the contests

(24:24):
told me to buy off two judges. He gave me
a bank account and told me to wire the money
to that. Oh well there you go, past winner, right
so or past contestant. A TV program they go and
they investigate the scandal. They reported on the whole thing,
and they came to the conclusion or this is what
they reported for a first place, when it was understood
that if a woman paid five hundred million wand which

(24:46):
is Korea's money, yeah, or about that's about four hundred
and seventy thousand US dollars. At the time, she would
be named Miss Korea oh for second place. The bribe
was about three hundred million one Why would you bribe
someone to get.

Speaker 3 (24:57):
To set one place? Well, you don't have that much money.

Speaker 2 (25:00):
You're like, we just want on the stand. You want
to give me a medal. Yeah. As a result, the
Korea Time had to apologize. The most recent Winter had
to make a statement that neither she nor her parents
had bribed any judges, and of course doubt had surfaced
and would not easily be swept over. Yeah. Yeah, which
takes us to Colombia. Oh, oh, Colombia. Now remember I
said they take beauty pageants? Seriously? Oh boy, how did

(25:23):
do they? The La Times reported on this phenomenon back
in like the late nineties. They noted that quote girls
in Colombia dream of growing up to be queen. They
imagine hearing their names being called and walking down the
runway to be crowned Queen of Rice, Queen of the sea,
Queen for a harvest or a day. So they have
Queen of.

Speaker 3 (25:42):
The Sea, Queen seaweed, yes, not teeth.

Speaker 2 (25:49):
That's where you go. No, like clamshell opens up and
you step out. Yeah, you're so sticking of seawater.

Speaker 3 (26:00):
Yeah, exactly.

Speaker 2 (26:00):
We got bowl kelp all over here.

Speaker 3 (26:02):
Yeah, I got like a crab hanging off one ear lobe.

Speaker 2 (26:05):
It's my jewelry.

Speaker 3 (26:06):
Exactly.

Speaker 2 (26:07):
So anthropologist Maria Victoria Ribe, she said, there are more
beauty contests here. There are millions of queens. The queens
are a sort of oasis and opiate of the masses.
Now she should know because she was Miss Bogata in
nineteen sixteen.

Speaker 3 (26:20):
Oh she got like a serious Miss Bogata.

Speaker 2 (26:22):
Miss Bogota. Oh yeah, she got one of them real queens.

Speaker 3 (26:24):
I guess she's not like, you know, Queen of the of.

Speaker 2 (26:28):
The of the corn Dispatch, the corn distributor. I know.

Speaker 3 (26:32):
I was like, what could she possibly.

Speaker 2 (26:33):
Get, Queen of the Carnaves cornas Aria.

Speaker 3 (26:35):
Yeah, exactly.

Speaker 2 (26:37):
Excited mean that one. So now we also elizab because
it's Columbia. We have to factor in the role of
narco traffickers.

Speaker 3 (26:44):
Oh yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 (26:46):
They start using beauty pageants as a form of competition
between them and a way to advertise their power. So
they get in on this game, and so now they're
starting to rig all these contests. Yeah, there's this author.
His name is etke Homo Setina, an amazing name. His
first name is eke Homo no way all one word wow.
So he wrote a book called Queen in Check, which

(27:06):
is about the drug barons and their influence on beauty pageants.
And so, for instance, my dude, Pablo Escobar, he kept
a signed photo of a beauty queen on his cell
like in his wall in prison.

Speaker 3 (27:16):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (27:16):
The photo was a nineteen ninety one finalist for Miss Colombia,
not even the winner, apparently. I don't know how his
bribes were working out in ninety one. He's like kind
of on the run at that point. So she'd personally
written to him on the back of her photo. I
haven't her favorite girlfriend, thank you for the trip and
all the lovely things you gave me for carta Hana,
Oh heavens. So now when I say my man Publo
Escobar for our Colombian listeners, I want to be clear.

(27:37):
I don't like Pablo Escobar. I'm not like rooting for
Publo Escobar. I'm also not trying to excuse the crimes
against him. Yeah. I call him my man the same
way that people have favorite US presidents. Okay, I don't
think these are morally good queen men disgusting. Yeah, I'm
just saying there's a powerful person who's part of history, Like.

Speaker 3 (27:54):
That's comical and disgusting exactly what he shows up here.

Speaker 2 (27:58):
And he's a horrific person. So I want to make clear,
like if I say al Capone's my man, I'm not.

Speaker 3 (28:02):
Like like, oh yeah.

Speaker 2 (28:03):
I'm riding Shaka with al Capone.

Speaker 7 (28:05):
Man.

Speaker 2 (28:05):
What's up y'all? No, not like that anyway. The open
secret the Colombian beauty queens are backed by drug traffickers.
This ultimately hurts the beauty queens on the world stage.
There has not been a Miss Columbia named is Miss
Universe the ultimate winner on the national or the international
stage since nineteen fifty eight. Elizabeth, do you think.

Speaker 3 (28:23):
That's why Steve Harvey do you think he had in
his pocket and then they caught him in it?

Speaker 2 (28:29):
Like Steve, you've been brob Son, keep back out there,
no no money? Oh man? Yeah, He's like, I'm not
going to race the mustache. I'm going back out. Yeah.
So Miss Columbia was the runner up three years running,
nineteen ninety two, nineteen ninety three, nineteen ninety four. They
just seemed to win. Now, remember in Steve Harvey, as
you pointed out, that was a Miss Columbia twenty fifteen.
And uh, anyway, poor Miss Columbia, I've been bad mouth

(28:53):
by the narco trafficker just.

Speaker 3 (28:55):
The idea of the bridesmaid.

Speaker 2 (28:57):
You know, you know what I'm saying, Elizabeth. Now let's
get back to the Miss USA competition for some more
domestic scandals and domestic crimes USA number one. So on
October third, twenty twenty two, very recent a woman named
our Bonnie Gabriel. She won the Miss USA contest. She's
a fashion designer from Texas. She was named Miss Texas

(29:17):
obviously first. Then she went on to win the whole shebang.
She was the first Filipino American to be named Miss Usa.

Speaker 3 (29:23):
Okay, go ahead, boom right.

Speaker 2 (29:25):
Soon after she won, number of former beauty contestants they
all come forward to say, the Miss USA beauty pageant
is rigged. Oh the sister pageant, Miss Universe. They step
in to tap down all this negative versity. They can't
have this right, so they said, and I quote, we
firmly believe everyone has a right to express their thoughts
and experiences without retaliation and bullying. There are existing systems
in place to ensure the fairness of our national competitions,

(29:48):
and as such, we have begun an active of review
into the situation. Now people are gonna get to the
bottom of things. Elizabeth.

Speaker 3 (29:55):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (29:55):
So as for her reputation, Gabrielle the MISSUS tech Miss USA,
she told the Washington Post the pageant was quote not rigged.

Speaker 4 (30:04):
Yeah, obviously she's rigged the heck up of it.

Speaker 3 (30:08):
I finessed that brought the most delicious tray of lumpia.

Speaker 2 (30:11):
Do you want to see the pictures? She added that quote.
Of course, the current allegations are based on perception and
not the truth. I would never want to enter a
competition that was rigged. I know all of the contestants
worked really hard to prepare, and I don't want these
allegations to overshadow the accomplishments of all the women who
participated in this year's Miss USA competition. She's not defending herself, Elizabeth,

(30:33):
She's defending all the potential. Miss USA's a banger. The
president of Miss USA pageant at the time was a
woman named Crystal Stewart. She was also a former Miss
Texas and a former Miss USA. Oh okay, and she
confirmed that as a former title holder, I learned firsthand
the importance of the fair and unbiased pageant competition, and
I respect the voices of the class of twenty twenty

(30:54):
two and every woman's right to have her voice heard.

Speaker 3 (30:57):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (30:57):
So now there's that sense of sisterhood, right, you know
they're all just doing it no anyway, Okay, So she
promised Spin that she and the Miss USA organization would
cooperate in the Miss Universe investigation as transparently as possible,
and then she announced her own internal investigation. So what
were the allegations? Great question, thank you. Following our Bonnie

(31:19):
Gabriel's win, TikTok gets lit up by contestants Miss New York,
she she took to Instagram. So she goes on Instagram
stories and says she's humiliated. I am lost for words.
The way I entered this pageant, I gave it every
last bit of my heart and soul. We were humiliated.
Thenk can we enter something with a fair chance?

Speaker 5 (31:39):
Right?

Speaker 3 (31:40):
So what? Okay, you're gonna tell.

Speaker 2 (31:41):
Me, But first I'm gonna let their voices, you know,
tell you the story of Elizabeth Miss New York. She
ended with The only reason I am speaking up is
to prevent future contestants from feeling the way that I do,
for all the little girls who watch Miss USA with
the same dreams I had of working hard to be
in that position. You deserve a fair.

Speaker 3 (32:04):
Chance, So they all thought they were going to be.

Speaker 2 (32:07):
They're doing it for the girls, Elizabeth, not her own
hurt ego. It's for the little girl, that's true, Miss
Missouri MICHAELA McGee. She told Business Insider, A lot of
the girls felt like it was the organization's plan from
the beginning for our Bonnie to win, no matter who
else was competing. Why would they feel this way? Well,
it was complicated, Elizabeth. But the women promised they had receipts.
When the winner was announced, typically the other fifty pageant

(32:29):
competitors they always crowd around. Then there you go. When
Gabrielle won, the other fifty women walked off stage.

Speaker 3 (32:38):
Wait what yes, No, that.

Speaker 2 (32:41):
Was hinky as all hell, Elizabeth, Yeah, but there was
more b bah. Wait it gets worse. Former Miss USA
contestant Jasmine Jones said, not one of them stays on
stage to congratulate her or to run and hugger. In
my ten years of pageantry. I've never seen contestants walk
off the stage and not congratulate the girl. That's one.

Speaker 3 (32:59):
What did she do this?

Speaker 2 (33:01):
So when e with the exclamation point, I caught up
with Gabrielle and asked her about the on stage embarrassment.
She downplayed it, saying our time was cut short so
the girls couldn't come out to the stage, apparently because
there wasn't time and they didn't want their girls to
go into that bubble and maybe fall. So at least
that's what she had heard from the folks in production backstage.
And she also added when I went back to the girls,
they all hugged me. You just didn't see you weren't there, so.

Speaker 3 (33:25):
They were just too excited for me. So they had
to go take a moment.

Speaker 2 (33:28):
Yeah, they needed to, like you know, unfroclemped. So this
was more than just Caddy's social snub, Elizabeth, There's a
lot more to this. The real ring leader of all
the posting on social media and the whole protest was
is miss Montana m Yeah, Heather Le O'Keefe. She came
out hard and heavy against Gabrielle. She pointed out that
when the winner's name was announced, Gabrielle didn't even look shocked.
It's like she knew or expected the result before it

(33:50):
was called. So Keith was also like on it with
the fact that there was the Miss Texas connections. So
Christelle and her both had the Miss Texas I had
TikTok fit o'keif claimed most of the Miss USA contestants
feel very strongly that there was favoritism towards Miss Texas USA,
and we have the receipts to prove it. And when
she says we, it really was a collective. There was
Miss Georgia, Miss New Jersey, Miss Kentucky, Miss Kansas, Miss Massachusetts,

(34:13):
Miss Virginia, Miss New York, Miss Missouri, and then obviously
Miss Montana. So there was a lot wout right. And
they pointed out that the head of Miss USA, Christelle
Stewart from Texas, was a former Miss USA and that
she was caught in this candid shot behind the scenes
doing Gabrielle's hair. This was apparently alleged evidence of their collusion. Gabrielle,
she was on it. She's like Christelle was there of course,
and she stepped in and actually did my hair because

(34:35):
she said, hey, I can do a snatch ponytail, and
I said I'd love to see it, and the photos
were posted because social media doesn't always reflect reality or
to the time as it passes, so boom, there you go. Right.
So o'keith had other receipts though, because Miss USA was
also coached up by Miss Academy, a beauty pageant training
company run by Christelle Stewart President, one would think according

(34:59):
to the primary Cary whistleblower, Miss Montana Gabrielle aka fellow
Miss Texas to Christal, was the only one who was
really featured on their pages, being one of their clients.

Speaker 3 (35:07):
So are other people their clients?

Speaker 2 (35:09):
Of course, about a lot of them more Yeah, So
Miss Montana noted that not to mention the actual Miss
us A page reposting Texas on the official Miss USA page,
and no other state contestant got this kind of treatment,
So there's like a whole thing that there's a lot
of posting. So there's a lot of posting evidence, right,
So Miss Montana alleged that the favoritism was obvious. Y'all.
Don't tell me you can't see it. Nothing against Texas

(35:31):
as a person. I truly think she could have won
fair and square, but unfortunately all this drama has tadened
her win. But there's just too much evidence of favoritism.
Let this go unnoticed. I love the expression nothing against Texas, see.

Speaker 3 (35:43):
That nothing about Texas as a person. But I'm just
not going to use her name.

Speaker 2 (35:46):
You have one more syllable to make that makes sense today,
Miss Texas could just for me like idiots like me.
Otherwise I'm picturing the entire state of Texas squeeze into
a ball game.

Speaker 3 (35:54):
I'm thinking, like I understand her humanity. I just refuse
to use her name totally.

Speaker 2 (35:59):
So this fire controversy, scandals spirals out of control. Even
Miss Montano Keef has to distance herself from some of
the allegations. She says, I'm open to talking to her
about it. I would love to communicate with her because
I think there's a lot of allegations coming up that
aren't true. Yes, that Sisterhood's is strong see no. After
the investigation, Miss Universe's spended former Miss USA Miss Texas
two thousand and eight, Christelle Stewart from the presidency. True

(36:22):
to a beauty queen, she was graceful and lost. She
was as she was deposed from power as a form
of titleholder. I learned firsthand the importance of a fair
and unbiased pageant competition, and I respect the voices of
the class of twenty two and every woman's right to
have her voice heard. Now see, I'm telling you real
feminists right there. Women.

Speaker 3 (36:38):
Women's what she said before I.

Speaker 2 (36:40):
Know, I'm taking notes on how to be graceful though. Meanwhile,
Miss USA, our Bonnie Gabrielle continued to compete and the
next year, in January, she went on to win Miss Universe.
No Way. Gabrielle said, the hardest part was I felt
like I didn't have a voice at times. As Miss USA.
I wanted to stand up for myself and say, hey,
this is false. This is very frustrating. But I want
to compose myself and carry this with grace. Because I

(37:02):
was in the public eye, I wanted to show people
how you can push back from adversity and be resilient
go what you bad, So Miss Universe she called it
the sweetest victory, and she added, this is a strong
message that I want to share with the world. No
matter if people try to knock you down or there
are misconceptions about you, you can't let that get to you.
You just keep going and you'll get what you deserve. Finally,
in August, the third party investigation gets concluded. The Miss

(37:24):
Universe organization deems that the allegations were false, but Crystal
Stewart was not reinstated.

Speaker 3 (37:30):
Eventually, she had a peaceful transmission of power.

Speaker 2 (37:33):
Yes she did. So there you go, though, Let's take
a little while.

Speaker 3 (37:36):
Hold on. You know, Miss Montana is in like a
silo bunker somewhere with red thread.

Speaker 2 (37:41):
All over the wall. This goes all the way to
the top.

Speaker 3 (37:44):
She gets universest to make her nuts.

Speaker 2 (37:46):
Oh of course. I mean these are like real emotional
highs and lows. They're just racing through. Yeah, total expectation
and then all of a sudden losing. They've trained for years.
She using like a little Olympic athletes, I know, of
beauty and talents. Yeah. So take a little break. Yeah,
and then we get back. I got one more for you.

Speaker 3 (38:04):
Oh you're kidding.

Speaker 2 (38:05):
Oh yeah, it's good.

Speaker 8 (38:05):
Oh boy?

Speaker 2 (38:26):
Oh right, Elizabeth, alright, Zaren, we're back. Yeah we are
want to talk feminisms more?

Speaker 3 (38:30):
Sure?

Speaker 2 (38:31):
Okay, So that last one I told you about the
Miss USA scandal. It led to a documentary a docuseries
called How to Fix a Pageant by The New York Times,
and it was written and done by Nicole Rittenmeyer.

Speaker 5 (38:44):
Right.

Speaker 2 (38:44):
So, Nicole Rittenmeyer she found some really interesting angles and
results of the Miss USA scandal. And she was talking
to Salon about this in an interview and she said,
you know, every single person we talked to, even if
they felt they had been done dirty or they didn't
get a fair share, or they've been maligned, literally every
single woman who had ever participated in pageants in any respect,
was like, I do not want pageants to die. I

(39:06):
think pageants offer so much. Now, of course the beauty
queens would say this, rightestines hunters say this about hunting.
People are going to say this about the thing they love.
But they also she noted that the pageant contestants all
argued for the feminist nature of beauty pageants. Right, and
so Rittenmeyer was raised by feminists. She considers herself a feminist.
So she interrogates this from that angle. She said, quote,

(39:27):
the very first thing that everyone cited was the sisterhood,
the lifelong friends. It sounds kind of cliche, like a
thing you would say for the press, but in reality,
I had no reason not to believe these women. They
all said it and they're all still friends.

Speaker 3 (39:41):
Okay.

Speaker 2 (39:41):
She even went further. She argued that for gen Z feminists,
a beauty pageant didn't even define all womanhood. It was
just one expression, is how they thought. This was her reasoning,
she said, and I quote one of the things we
see with the gen Z women is they're kind of like,
why are their rules about what we can do and
can't do? Who said? Who made that up? And I
think that is the right evolution to feminism. We shouldn't

(40:02):
be in a situation where I'm judging one of these
young women and saying, how dare you get up there
in a bathing suit or in an evening gown or
whatever it is. If that's your bliss, that's how you
find your fullest explanation and exploration of being a strong,
powerful woman. Go girl, now up to she said, go girl.
I was right there.

Speaker 3 (40:19):
But at the same time, she's saying, Okay, so don't
judge them because they like to wear a swimsuit. But
what if someone gets on there and they don't want
to wear a swimsuit? Then they're judging. The whole thing
is judging. So they're saying, you know, for them, that works.

Speaker 2 (40:33):
Yeah, but the judge, I think she's deemphasizing the judging
as well.

Speaker 3 (40:37):
Here her spirit, it's okay if they want to wear
a swimsuit, what if they don't.

Speaker 2 (40:42):
She speaks to the male gaze point, she said, I quote.
Another thing that's really interesting about this is there's this
automatic assumption that it's all about the male gaze. That's
not who watches these shows. It's certainly not who participates,
but the people who watch this are women. So women
are performing for women, and now with a new ownership,
they've made it more and more of a fully woman
led organization. So now, what do you think.

Speaker 3 (41:03):
I don't think it has to be immediate male gaze,
but just in my personal opinion, and again I'm sure
that plenty of people will disagree with me, and I
don't want to hear it if they do. But if
you're servicing this whole notion that's come up in our
society of how women are supposed to present themselves in
order to be women and to be you know, an ideal,
because that's what they're saying, Yes, that's crap.

Speaker 2 (41:25):
I don't think they're supposed to be an ever present ideal.
There's there's just like one example of there.

Speaker 3 (41:30):
But who decides that ideal?

Speaker 2 (41:31):
Well, these judges for their show, right, and then.

Speaker 3 (41:33):
But that if you look go back, that's not something
that women created for women. That was created by the
men for this contest for the So you know, yeah,
you can have women in charge, but like you.

Speaker 2 (41:44):
Know, still operating under presumption of precisely. Okay, well, now
we've had some fun, we've had some laughter, we had
some serious consideration. You ready for things to go truly
go sideways. Yes, let's return to one of the big names,
Donald Trump. He's a beauty pageant guy. Yeah, the fact
in the stories I read he was often called it
a pageant overlord. That was the press the time. Right now,

(42:07):
I'm not going to talk about any of the gross
stuff about him, like peering into the dressing rooms and stuff.
There's something really funny that I can go with that,
And no, I don't even really want to discuss it
because it's just so wrong, Sarah.

Speaker 3 (42:16):
The older I get, the angrier I get, So I
just want to have that as Okay.

Speaker 2 (42:21):
Now, this takes place back when he owned the Miss
USA and Miss Teen USA and Miss Universe pageants.

Speaker 3 (42:26):
Like I own the Miss teen USA pageant. Just okay.

Speaker 2 (42:31):
So at the time Miss teen USA was Tara Connor,
poor thing gal from Kentucky. She looked to lose her
crown because she was young, She's been out partying, she
got messy. Most notably she kissed a girl and the
paparazzi captured it. Two thousand and six. This is occurring.
So this is like pre gay marriage passing in this

(42:51):
or this is like still like very much an issue,
like even Democrats weren't coming around for like, oh I'm
gonna back there totally the rights of people who yes, okay,
So we have like an outrage like, oh, she's kissing
the girl, she's Miss teen Usa.

Speaker 5 (43:03):
Right.

Speaker 2 (43:03):
Also she's drinking in bars in New York. She's he's
clearly she's you know, seemingly high drunk, what have you.
So people are getting upset, they start canceling public appearances
or canceling photo ops. She's got to avoid the press.
Talk was she's gonna be fired as Miss teen USA
because who's her boss, the celebrity apprentice guy and at
the time is his big You're fired right? Or what

(43:24):
was like, oh, he's gonna say it. When's he gonna
tell her you're fired?

Speaker 5 (43:27):
Right?

Speaker 2 (43:27):
She sounds like a whole thing anyway, Donald Trump. He
steps forward and defends her true advocate that he is Elizabeth.
Because if ever there were a man to step forward
to defend a blonde woman from a rather meaningless crisis,
only to make it then all about him, it's gonna
be the former president. But you know that, Elizabeth, so right.
I didn't make lazy jokes about it. I'd rather close

(43:48):
stop stopping.

Speaker 3 (43:52):
Oh my eyes are closed, Elizabeth.

Speaker 2 (43:54):
You were standing outside a large, dark glass and steel
building in Manhattan. You were there to cover press conference.
You're working as a camera woman for the local TV
news WNJZ. Normally you're part of their Channel two Action
News team investigation team, but today they've sent you over
close to Central Park to Trump Towers, headquarters of the
Miss Universe, Miss USA, and Miss Teen USA pageants. The

(44:16):
weather's a little brisk this Tuesday. A breeze moves through
the color and the leaves and the trees. You sip
on your latte while you still have time. Your job
today is to point your camera at the two folks
who called the press conference. Miss teen USA, who the
former Miss Kentucky and her boss and benefactor, Donald Trump,
the billionaire has called the presser to calm the rough
seas of negative publicity about Miss teen USA and her

(44:39):
quasi lesbian kiss. You zoom in your camera and set
the focus on her. You pull back out to a
standard shop for the TV news. But then she doesn't
speak instead, of course it's Trump. You have to re
aim your camera at him. He starts to speak while
you and the gathered press listen to Donald Trump. She
left a small town in Kentucky, and she was telling
me that she got caught up in the whirlwind of

(45:00):
New York. Now you know what he means. All the
recent tabloid shots of her out partying, drunk, possibly high,
and there's the one shot where she's very clearly kissing
a woman outside a bar. But Miss teen USA just
turned twenty one yesterday, literally Monday. Wait, so she's not
even a teen the day before the press conference.

Speaker 3 (45:18):
So she's still missed. So she was twenty when she
won Miss teen that's a bigger scan.

Speaker 2 (45:23):
What kind of role model is she for the American
Beauty pageant? Stands Elizabeth no Idea Now in response. You
have to watch Trump explain why he's decided not to
fire Miss teen USA after a bit of preening and posing.
After he delivers a good line that the press laughs at,
Trump says, I've always been a believer in second chances.
He's like the anti Fitzgerald. Now. Trump then outlines how

(45:44):
Miss teen USA will be going to rehabs. As a result,
her duties will be limited as she receives the help
she needs during this personal time. You think to yourself, hmm,
miss teen USA is going to rehab. It sounds like
Alana del Ray lyric. But she you know, she's already
one Miss America, so whatever. Meanwhile, the press conference grows
tiresome as Miss teen Usa aka Miss Kentucky says, You'll

(46:07):
never know how much I appreciate mister Trump for saved
me on this one. It truly takes someone with a
wonderful heart, a heart of gold, and a blessed soul.
He's a very, very compassionate person, and obviously I learned
that today. I'm so happy I'll be giving this opportunity
because I know that when I do my job, I'm
very passionate about it. You listen to a Cabby hank
At a pedestrian, thank the driver for the noise that

(46:29):
drowns out the press conference. You no longer have to
hear Miss ten USA say how passionate she is about
her job, being a spokesmodel, for having fun hair or whatever. Elizabeth,
I'm so surprised to you. Why would you be so
critical of Trump and Miss teen USA? No, you'd forget
how beauty pageants are a feminist exercise so quickly forgot
or whatever the claim is it way, Look, I'm not

(46:50):
saying they are or they aren't. I'm just raising the question.
What if Custer escaped from the Battle of Little Bighorn
and he became a famous beauty pageant contestant?

Speaker 3 (47:00):
Okat? Okay's the thing that just one little quick pump. Okay.
So she's Miss teen USA. She's twenty years old, so whatever,
we're going to overlook that thing. And she's out just
having a night of carousing.

Speaker 2 (47:10):
Doing her thing. Yeah, being twenty that's what twenty year olds. Yeah,
but it's two thousand and six.

Speaker 3 (47:14):
They weren't ready, they've been doing it.

Speaker 2 (47:16):
Yeah, of course, no, we all agree, And that's how
Trump liked it. He normally paid extra for this cat. Sorry,
I don't know, go to the island. That's what you
expect exactly. So anyway, he was stoked at her address.
You knew right where she could find her and her friends. Yeah,

(47:37):
hold up in my apartment.

Speaker 3 (47:39):
Yeah, we're like blink three times.

Speaker 2 (47:41):
Seriously before you become a Fox News No, I remember
I told you about the Miss USA pageant that was
alleged to be rigged. Well turns out that was not
the first time. Okay, keeping it trump for a moment.
He was involved in that story of the rigged Missus
USA contest. And again his involvement may surprise you.

Speaker 3 (47:58):
Wait, Missus USA or miss Missus.

Speaker 2 (48:00):
I keep saying, miss I keep running complicated?

Speaker 3 (48:02):
Did they get married?

Speaker 2 (48:03):
Yeah? Sorry, I'm terrible Miss Usa. The year was twenty twelve,
because I know you always like to know where am I? Anyway,
So Miss Pennsylvania was a woman named Sheena Monan okay
monin m O n n I n okay anyway, So
she entered the Miss USA contest. She gets bounced out
in the early rounds. Oops. Anyway, I guess she wasn't

(48:24):
going down with a fight because she gets on the
horn and she alleges that the beauty pageants rigged?

Speaker 3 (48:29):
Oh is that where he gets all those ideas?

Speaker 2 (48:31):
So what was her claim? Well, Monan said that she
was backstage with Miss Florida, though, who told her that
she'd seen a list of the finalists before the show,
and then when the finalists were announced live, it was
the exact same list she'd heard. Boom rigged. Elizabeth totally
fixes in. Convinced of the truth of the rigged pageant,
Miss Pennsylvania takes to Facebook and in a series of

(48:52):
scathing posts, she resigned her crown in my.

Speaker 3 (48:56):
Heart, crown if Pennsylvania.

Speaker 2 (48:58):
Pennsylvania in my heart. I believe in honesty, fair play,
a fair opportunity, and high moral integrity, none of which,
in my opinion, are part of this paget system any longer.
Now seeing a story perfect for them, the morning shows
came a call, right, so Miss Pennsylvania. She makes the
round of appearances on programs like Today's show, Good Morning America.
What have you? Yeah, she told the host, Well Anne

(49:20):
Curry in particular, I know what I heard. There's no
doubt in my mind that the contestant was serious when
she laid out what she said she saw, and I
believe her to be true. Yeah. She also added to
Anne Curry, there are many reasons that a list can
be laying around with the top five names, But when
the names were called out in the order that she
said she saw them on the list, that's just too

(49:41):
coincidental to not be true. Now, to really make her
case the beauty contestant, she cited her ability to analyze
and interpret hidden psychology. Oh, I have many years of
psychological training. I know when someone's telling a joke. I
know when someone's scared and when someone's serious. And in
my opinion, her body language was very serious. She looked

(50:04):
a little bit scared because she had just seen something
that could potentially drastically change the reputation of the Miss
Universe organization. This is a big deal. Oh my god,
she knows someone tells a joke versus when someone's serious.
That was a joke. The tone after she did the
rounds of the morning news shows and alledge that the

(50:26):
Miss USA was rigged. The now former Miss Pennsylvania had
made a real petty enemy Donald Trump, so he immediately
goes on the attack. Right twenty twelve, Trump starts with
the alleged eyewitness Miss Florida Trump.

Speaker 3 (50:39):
This is when he's gearing up with like all his want.

Speaker 2 (50:42):
First time, Yeah, the first time he's thinking about right.

Speaker 3 (50:45):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (50:45):
So Trump said, the person that supposedly saw the list
totally denies that it took place, and Trump added that
she let him know that it was a throwaway comment
and that she had never meant it as fact. So
then she went on all the TV shows that Florida
like this. Florida personally told him Miss she never meant
it this fact, Elizabeth. So he went and did his

(51:06):
usual personal tax. He reasoned that it was just the
grousing of a bitter loser. Trump said, I never felt
that she had a chance. All this is buyer's remorse.

Speaker 3 (51:14):
Eight grousings of a bitter loser.

Speaker 2 (51:16):
Yeah. So he told the morning shows that he'd given
the new now former Miss Pennsylvania twenty four hours to
respond and issue a public apology or he'd take her
to court. Right. So then old girl Miss Pa, she
did not back down. Now we got like a tri
state area beach. So she's like, what twenty four hours,
they come, they passed, Trump talks. He goes right back
to the talking heads on Good Morning America. I think

(51:37):
that frankly, she should apologize. We will be bringing a
lawsuit against her. She lost, and if you look at
her compared to the people who were in the top fifteen,
you would understand why she's not in the top fifteen.
It's a very, very sad situation. So this is where
Trump is at his best as an insult comic, Like
I don't want to talk about like politics, but the
man kills as an insult comic. He's like if Don

(51:58):
Rickles had a rich daddy, you know, like Trump later said,
we're going to be suing her now she had made
a very false charge and she knows it's a false charge. Now,
still their public squabbling's not done. The former Miss Pa
she's like tri state throwdown, Let's do this right. So
she's coming. She reappears on the Today Show and she says,
I feel disappointed that Trump has made some of the
statements that he said about me, and I feel prepared

(52:21):
to continue to pursue the truth. I know what I heard,
and I know what I in turn witnessed come true
based on what I heard the contestants said, she saw
the list, So I'm prepared to continue to march forward,
like across the Edmund Pettis Bridge Elizabeth, this civil rights
worker for her own justice. And this was a mistake
on her part because in the meantime, the pageant organizers

(52:42):
they focused on why Miss Pia really quit the game.
The Miss Universe folks later came forward with a full
accounting of their own, and they pushed out Olivia Culpo.
She was Miss Rhode Island. Shout out to producer Dave,
and she was named the winner of the Miss USA. Now,
as Colpo said, Miss Pia's original story sounded a little

(53:02):
iffy to me. She came forward because after all this hullabaloo,
and she said she knew Miss Pa pretty well because
they were typically lined up real close to each other
because the states go alphabetically, right, So she said that
Miss they kind of got to know each other. So
she talked to her. She's like, yeah, Miss Pennsylvania resigned
not due to it being rigged, but because Trump had
allowed a transgender competitor into the Miss USA pageant.

Speaker 3 (53:24):
Huh.

Speaker 2 (53:25):
So after a transgender woman had wanted to compete in
the Miss Universe pageant representing Canada, she was first barred
from competition. Yeah, Trump then goes and changes the rules
for the Miss Universe Universe. When this was brought up
as her reasoning Trump changing the rules to allow a
transgender woman or transgender women rather to compete in the
Miss Universe contest Miss ten USA, Miss USA, he tried

(53:48):
to downplay it, and he said he doubted that that's
why Miss Pa stepped down. He preferred the narrative that
she was a jealous loser or whatever. Right, so as
he put it, and I quote, I think her primary
issue was that she low and she's angry about losing. Frankly,
in my opinion, I saw her for barely a second.
She didn't deserve to be in the top fifteen. He
goes right back to tech. She's she's an uggle woman.

(54:08):
I don't know what to tell you. So there he
is our insult comic king, and he really should have
stuck to a comedy and posting like I think he
would have been way happier as a person, right just
I know you would be. I know a lot of
other people would be. But there's a lesson there about ego,
about not letting like a cool black man knock you
off your game because he made people laugh at you.
That's what I do every week here. Look that's gonna happen.

(54:31):
And also it's like like teenagers, they're gonna make fun
of what you wear, which happens when I leave the house. Right,
this is just the death and taxes of life. But anyway,
the wildest part of all this talk of Miss teen
Usa being rigged is that Trump eventually wins in court.
And you don't hear that much anymore. No, she lost
on charges of defamation. The ruling wasn't Miss Pennsylvania. She
and Monan had to pay Trump and his beauty pageant

(54:54):
organization five million dollars for reputational damage because they lost,
like some contract with the person. Anyway, arbitrator uphold the ruling,
then a federal judge upholds the arbitrator's decision. Ultimately, Trump
wins in court when he supported a transgender woman against
a beauty queen. Who would have.

Speaker 3 (55:11):
Thought, I've just I'm blown away by the Wow.

Speaker 2 (55:16):
Elizabeth, what's your favorite.

Speaker 3 (55:18):
Ridiculous take away how things change?

Speaker 7 (55:22):
Uh?

Speaker 3 (55:22):
My ridiculous takeaway? I just want people to feel happy
with what they do, enjoy themselves. Yes always, you know,
and so I you know. I don't like when agendas
are pushed, even though I push it a lot of agendas.
But you know, if people like the pageants, is what
I'm trying to say, then like, go on, I don't
think it's good to put kids in them because they
don't have the agency really to decide. Yeah, totally, And

(55:44):
it's a lot of like.

Speaker 2 (55:45):
And it defines their world before they yeah.

Speaker 3 (55:47):
Yeah, and I you know, and I just wish that
we as a culture had better ways of measuring all people.
But you know, yes, I'm a dreamers erin you are.

Speaker 2 (55:56):
I like that about you. I've always liked that about you. No,
you're not there. You've got a whole group with you,
and they're mostly dogs. But I like that about you and.

Speaker 3 (56:01):
You and we all when we're dreaming bark in our.

Speaker 2 (56:04):
Sleep, Elizabeth, Oh my goodness, did you just I did?
Were you copying it?

Speaker 3 (56:10):
It's part of the sisterhood anyway.

Speaker 2 (56:13):
Mine is I want there to be more competitions, not
about like I think that the word beauty throws people
off where I think really what they mean is like
a pageant of what we all agree according to these ideals,
because like there's like, uh, you know, art contests that's
essentially a beauty contest, like the oscar Wards is essentially
a beauty contest, just so that the aesthetics right. So

(56:33):
I want once for like lumberjacks and like house painters.
I want house painter pageants like that. Dude, Look at
his colors. He works so hard. Did you see all
these colors on his out?

Speaker 3 (56:43):
You want that when you painted houses?

Speaker 2 (56:45):
Kidding? If we could have a pageant, I would be like, Yo,
tell my boy Chris taking you down this year, son,
bring your best white the overalls. I don't even care anyway,
that's mine.

Speaker 3 (56:55):
So ridiculous. You don't, don't email or mess just with
complaints about me. I feel like I'm setting myself up
for him today.

Speaker 2 (57:04):
Oh no, send them all to me like, yeah, give
me the yes please I said it? Or just keep
it to yourself or yeah, I just act like you know,
an adult and be like you know what. They may
have said that and that's their opinion.

Speaker 3 (57:15):
Yes, there it is.

Speaker 2 (57:16):
Anyway, it's not the truth. It's just an opinion for
a talkback? What's for goodness?

Speaker 3 (57:21):
Am I all right?

Speaker 2 (57:22):
Producer? Dave hit it, Oh my god.

Speaker 5 (57:32):
I love Jeet, Hey, y'all, Michelle and Phoenix.

Speaker 7 (57:39):
I just paused the old man in the gun episode
when you guys were talking about the guards having their
families on Alcatraz.

Speaker 5 (57:45):
True facts. There's this movie called Murder in the First
with Kevin.

Speaker 7 (57:49):
Bacon from the nineties and they show that as an
aspect of the movie.

Speaker 5 (57:54):
So check the movie out. Love the show. Former Bay
Area kid here, so keep it up, have a great day.

Speaker 2 (58:02):
Yes it's former baby.

Speaker 3 (58:03):
Watch that movie.

Speaker 2 (58:04):
Man, dude. Respect to y'all right out the box just
for being a former Bay Area kid.

Speaker 8 (58:09):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (58:09):
Now, thanks for also for the hookup on the information
on the prison. Oh yeah, but I still would be
so judgmental to my parents if they had me being
raised on Yeah, on alculatize You're like, I'm sorry, I'm
glad you have a job.

Speaker 5 (58:20):
Dad.

Speaker 2 (58:21):
I understand it could be tough, but couldn't you sell shoes?

Speaker 3 (58:24):
Yeah?

Speaker 5 (58:25):
You.

Speaker 2 (58:25):
As always, you can find us online Ridiculous Crime the
social media's. We have our website which we highly recommend,
ridiculous crime dot com. Just like it sounds. We also
obviously love your talkback, so go to the iHeart app
download it, leave one. You may hear your own voice
on the air. Email us if you like a Ridiculous
Crime at gmail. Dot com and this time say dear Zaren. Yes, anyway,

(58:47):
that's all I got for you. We'll catch you next crime.
Thanks for listening. Ridiculous Crime is hosted by Elizabeth Dutton
and Zaren Burnett, produced and edited by the President of
the Fancy Lads School for Handsome Men, Dave Couston. Research
is by Marisa I prefer pirate booty pageants Brown and Andrea. Yes,

(59:12):
I'm a fan of all buried treasure contests regardless of gender.
Song Sharpened hear Our theme song is by twenty sixteen's
mister san Diego aka mister Gaslight, Thomas Lee and Travis
you can just call me mister Universe Sole Basic Income Dutton.
The host wardrobe provided by Bobby five hundred. Guest hair

(59:32):
and makeup by Sparkleshot and mister Andre. Executive producers are
Ben I'm not just the president, I'm also a spokesmodel
for the Handsome Men's Modeling agency Bowling and twenty twenty
twos and twenty twenty threes, two times mister Americana Facewarmer
of the Year aka mister Beard No.

Speaker 3 (59:50):
Brown REDI why say it one more time?

Speaker 1 (01:00:00):
Riudiqueous Crime, Ridiculous Crime is a production of iHeartRadio. Four
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