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January 18, 2024 47 mins

Manifesting may be a big buzz word in pop culture- but that's because IT WORKS! Best-Selling Author Gabby Bernstein tells us how to turn that term into action...and how to turn meltdowns into miracles.In this discussion, Oliver opens up about his deep-rooted anxiety and the forces that led him down a dark path.Kate tells us how she created contentment in her life through meditation and manifestation...Spiritually speaking...this is a CAN'T MISS guide to creating a new you in the new year!

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Speaker 1 (00:01):
Hi.

Speaker 2 (00:05):
I am Kate Hudson and my name is Oliver Hudson.

Speaker 1 (00:08):
We wanted to do something that highlighted our.

Speaker 2 (00:11):
Relationship and what it's like to be siblings. We are
a sibling.

Speaker 1 (00:20):
Reval No, no, sibling, you don't do that with your mouth.

Speaker 2 (00:30):
Revelry.

Speaker 1 (00:33):
That's good. I'm really excited about this. Reveler revel in it.

Speaker 2 (00:41):
Revel in it. We need to do a revel in
it interest.

Speaker 1 (00:45):
I mean, I'm all, are this is your this is
my I brought Abby on board.

Speaker 2 (00:57):
Right, and and you know, for those who might not
know or understand in this news, are you turning.

Speaker 3 (01:02):
This into a competition?

Speaker 2 (01:03):
No, no, no, but I'm not. I'm not because I'm not.
I'm not. But my point is that the revel in
it are the people who.

Speaker 3 (01:10):
We, yeah, who were into.

Speaker 2 (01:12):
Or even if we're.

Speaker 1 (01:14):
About writer, we see and we're like, I want to
talk to that person, right.

Speaker 2 (01:17):
And we each have our own lists that we're trying
to get, so, yeah, like, this is your revel is
this is.

Speaker 1 (01:23):
What my revel? Gabby Burnstein different, she's a manifestor I
did she so? My My girlfriend Jen introduced me to her,
not personally, but just through her work and she had
this thing called a manifesting challenge and it was years ago,
I think before I met Danny, or maybe it was
the year that I met Danny or something, but it

(01:45):
was all she does this thing in the beginning of
the year where you go and you do this whole
manifesting thing, which then led me to her books since
she's all about you know, spiritual teachings and her path
and she's a very interesting life which we'll learn about.
But in these revel in its, we just want to
really talk to people that are inspiring or could inspire other.

Speaker 2 (02:03):
People and have inspired us and inspired one way or another.

Speaker 1 (02:08):
And I love manifesting as a practice.

Speaker 2 (02:12):
Well I'm excited because manifesting for me, I'm a little
skeptical because I have to find the word a little
bit more meaning. You know, manifests like a jewel and
it comes out of your ear, you know what I mean.
But levels to manifestations.

Speaker 1 (02:28):
Is the great manifesto.

Speaker 2 (02:29):
I know.

Speaker 1 (02:31):
Come on, what if Baba just like showed up right
now and he's like, Oliver, no, I mean, here, here's
a jewel.

Speaker 2 (02:40):
Like I love. I believe in magic of sorts.

Speaker 1 (02:43):
I gotchat.

Speaker 2 (02:44):
I believe in the power of positive thinking. I believe
in positive affirmation. But I don't know I'm gonna if
I wanted to manifest a job like I've been trying.

Speaker 1 (03:00):
Like you should have asked, Gabby, is that is that
is not the definition of manifesting. But but we could
get into that with Gabby's anyway, here, this is our
this ret.

Speaker 3 (03:18):
Open the door.

Speaker 2 (03:20):
We should do a door found.

Speaker 1 (03:27):
Okay, Gabby, you are a number one New York Times
bestselling author. You are a motivational speaker, you are a
spiritual leader. Talk to us, give us a little bit
of background as to like how you started this path
and like what was the first thing where you're like,
you know what, I want to help people live their

(03:48):
best life?

Speaker 2 (03:48):
And did you graduate college?

Speaker 3 (03:51):
I graduated college with a BFA and theater and definitely
did not need to go to college. Let's start with that.
Let's start with that. I was like being taught to
breathe throughout college, and I was way too young to
be understanding how to breathe at that time, So college
was a bust for me. So I've I think that

(04:13):
I really knew and believed that I was meant to
do the work that I do now be a spiritual
teacher in whatever form. When I was fourteen, Okay, so
I was at the time the president of the regional
youth group at my temple, and I recall feeling very

(04:36):
called to lead these weekends, Like we would do these
like retreat weekends in the temple, and I would be
almost like this like teenage sherpa like leading these weekends
and really lit up about the spirituality, not particularly the religion,
but the spirituality. And I was also brought up in
a really spiritual home. My mom in some ways kind

(04:58):
of reminds me of what I think of your mom. Like,
my like perception of your mom is a little bit
like maybe it's like the archetype that I see her as,
but Mom's like super zany major hippie like would bring
me to the ashrums. When I was younger, I was
named by the gurus, I was taught how to meditate.
She would shut the door, an incense would be pouring
out of her room. So this is my vision of

(05:19):
your mother.

Speaker 1 (05:21):
That's not far off, far off, right, Like she was
raised Jewish and then became a Buddhist.

Speaker 3 (05:27):
Like that's pretty much. Yeah, that's pretty much what I would.

Speaker 2 (05:31):
Have to India for twenty five years, has hit up
every asrom.

Speaker 1 (05:34):
Rempuchet, Yes, sleeping over.

Speaker 2 (05:37):
And I was married by yeah right, yeah.

Speaker 3 (05:41):
Yeah we are. We are cut from the same cloth here.
And so that seed was planted at a really young age,
and that was really a gift for me because while
I had this beautiful spiritual foundation of learning how to
meditate and being introduced to these principles, I also really

(06:01):
felt and connected to spirit at that time. When I
would meditate, my extremities would go numb and I would
feel really connected to something beyond my physical site. And
then I turned my back on that for probably my
early adolescence and most into my high school and college,
and I started to try to numb out some of

(06:23):
the depression and anxiety. And I, just like a normal teenager,
had a lot going on, but I was feeling deep
feelings and I didn't want to feel those feelings, so
I numbed out. Turned into drug addiction, alcoholism, cocaine addiction
by the time I was twenty five. The beautiful thing
about that spiritual foundation is that it was there for

(06:45):
me when I needed it most. And so when I
recognized that this path of looking outside of myself wasn't
working anymore. I knew where to go and that's what
so I got sober eighteen years ago and then really
reag united my spiritual faith, my spiritual foundation.

Speaker 2 (07:02):
But do you think do you think the reason that
you sort of were Trump was trying were trying to
numb so many things. Do you think it's because of
you know, just how sensitive you are, meaning as far
as your intuition goes, as far as how you're taking
on the energy of everyone else, or is it trauma
based or you know, because I'm not speaking from experience,

(07:27):
but I feel a lot, you know what I mean,
like very like my intuition and I just my empathy.
I feel so much that sometimes it becomes overwhelming. And
then that's what my anxiety has stemmed from, amongst other things.
And it's easy to sort of smoke a bunch of
weed or drink a bunch of liquor or whatever, numb
numb it out.

Speaker 1 (07:46):
You know.

Speaker 3 (07:47):
The other is all of the above. I too felt
a lot. I also think, yes, having that kind of
veil not being so thick, right, the veil was pretty
lifted for me, and so I felt a lot of
not only people and energy of people, but also the
presence of energy beyond me, and so that was very
overwhelming for me. But I also didn't know why I
became a drug addict or an alcoholic until I turned

(08:09):
thirty six, and so I was sort of under this
belief that like, oh, I just went down the wrong path,
or I was really controlling and I was trying to
control my life, or whatever it was. But the addiction
continued to follow me even into a decade into my sobriety.
And it was when I was thirty six that I
actually had a dream and remembered sexual abuse from my childhood.

(08:31):
And that memory was horrific and terrifying, And if anyone
has had a dissociated memory resurface, they know what I'm
talking about. You kind of go back into the trauma
in a pretty extreme way for a while. But it
was also this huge relief because it explained everything. It
explained why I was an addict. It explained why I

(08:55):
was pushing so hard, It explained why I was so extreme.
It explained why I had so much anxiety, so much fear.
I explained why I was afraid of being in my body,
and that began a whole other level of spiritual and
personal growth in therapeutic development. And so I really started
living at that point.

Speaker 1 (09:16):
So as you were going through this process, were you
aware did your life sort of immediately start to shift
into like this being a calling for you to either
help others? Or was or or did your sort of
principles and your teaching principles come after you had done
a lot about healing or was it like sort of

(09:37):
happening simultaneously.

Speaker 3 (09:38):
I think, oh, no, it was happening simultaneous. Like by
the time I remembered this, I was ten years sober,
I'd written about six books, I'd been on OPRAH, like
I had had, I'd built a career as a young
spiritual teacher, and maybe I'd had like eight books at
that point. You know, it was like this was well
on my way of being of service, giving and frankly

(09:59):
doing it in the world way that I could then.
And I think that I've always taught from where I
am teaching from this seat that I'm sitting in now.
So everything that came before that memory was exactly as
it needed to be, and it was exactly what I
needed to teach. And then everything beyond it has continued

(10:19):
to develop and help me ground more in the work
that I do.

Speaker 1 (10:23):
Take take our our listeners or we were called what
were we calling them our revelers?

Speaker 2 (10:31):
There's ten of them.

Speaker 3 (10:34):
I'm won take us through what lit'sen.

Speaker 1 (10:39):
I want to get to the I want people to
know what it is that you do, Like I want
what are those key principles that you really you know,
if someone was coming to being, like how do I
start my journey? Where where do I start? Where do
I begin? Like what is the Gaby way? Right?

Speaker 2 (10:57):
And maybe we can fold this into it because I'm
interested in we already skipped through eight times bestsellers in
Oprah being your best Friend? Like how did we get there?
Like what was the moment you know where it's like,
oh shit, I'm going to write a book and all
of a sudden, oh whoa bang, here we are?

Speaker 3 (11:14):
You know?

Speaker 1 (11:14):
Well?

Speaker 3 (11:14):
Like it actually brings me back to a question that
Kate had asked earlier, and I was going to answer it.
You were like, well, when did you know that you
were meant to do this? And I always knew when
I was fourteen years old, when I was when I
was doing drugs, Like I remember being in my studio
apartment in New York City on Thirteenth Street, and like
the garbage cans r outside my window and it was
just just chaos. Maybe it was like three o'clock in

(11:36):
the morning, and I had this stack of self help
books next to my bed. It was like Wayne Dyer
and Louise Hay and all of these beautiful spiritual books
and journals and journals and journals. And I was high
on whatever drugs I was taking, and I had a
bunch of strangers in my apartment and I pointed at
the books and I was like, I'm going to be
a motivational speaker and a self help book author and
whoever was I was like, yeah, nice fucking try. And

(11:59):
so but I knew. I knew it was a intuitive knowing,
it was a psychic knowing, it was a purpose knowing.
I have a mantra that I live by. It's this
Joan of Arc quote, I am not afraid. I was
born to do this. And so it's almost like my
soul has known I've been in this body in this

(12:21):
lifetime with a strong knowing that this is what I'm
here to do, and a knowing that through my recovery
and my healing. I will teach, I will heal. That's
how I teach, That's how I do it. I go first,
I say, hey, I've lived through addiction. Okay, here's how
I got through that. I've been through workaholism, Here's how

(12:44):
I get through that. Survived depression and anxiety. Here's how
I've done that, and then trauma recovery. And so I
don't think anything's an accident. I think my whole life
as much as I do believe we have free will
in this lifetime and we can choose the path we
go down. I do believe that we also make that

(13:05):
choice before the soul comes in. I think we say
I'm gonna come in and do all this.

Speaker 1 (13:10):
I feel like there's a predestined When we were talking,
we were actually talking about this over Thanksgiving, like is
their free will or are when it comes to sort
of the quantum physics of things, like are we truly predestinedly.

Speaker 2 (13:25):
Drunk and smacked you in your face and you were like.

Speaker 1 (13:27):
All of our stop it. Oh that almost was the
end of it. I was almost as my brother.

Speaker 3 (13:33):
But I feel like that was like its intoxicated free will.
It's a little different, but.

Speaker 2 (13:41):
I'm here to help.

Speaker 3 (13:42):
People, by the way, I really do.

Speaker 1 (13:44):
I think.

Speaker 2 (13:44):
I think I'm in the wrong work.

Speaker 1 (13:46):
I think. I think I love that quote because I
think we all can lean into that quote more.

Speaker 2 (13:53):
You know.

Speaker 1 (13:54):
I think everybody if they're tuned in to like their
purpose that you, if you could really into that, then
you will be living what you're.

Speaker 2 (14:02):
It must feel so gratifying to help so many people,
you know what I mean, It's got to be an amazing,
amazing feeling, you know, real quick. But I went to
hoff this place called the Hoffmann Institute, which we're not
going to talk about, but it was incredible for me.

Speaker 3 (14:16):
You should talk about it here whatever you're ready.

Speaker 2 (14:19):
Too many times I talked about it on the podcast
A bunch. And I get these letters because when you're
in Hoffman at the end, you had to write these
letters of how you heard about the place, and it's
a letter of gratitude. I have so many of them,
and I cry every time I read one because I'm like,
holy shit, I'm the catalyst for this person potentially changing

(14:39):
their life, and it feels so amazing and I can't
even imagine, like you've probably changed millions of lives, made
a lot of money all at the same time.

Speaker 3 (14:52):
You know, I think that it's not about how many
people's lives we change. It's about changing our own life,
and as a result, our change ignites change in others period.
So by whether it be expressing it and talking about
Hoffmann and then inspiring other people to do it, or

(15:14):
as a motivational speaker, there's this saying that you go first.
So you tell your story and it literally lights everybody
up to say, yeah, me too, me too, me too,
me too. And I think that we've seen that in
many different movements. We've seen that in many different ways,
and so by living to tell, we all have the
power to express that truth and then express then help
other people recognize it in themselves. So in my case,

(15:36):
I don't really see when people come up to me
they're like, oh, you changed my life. I'm like, or
you saved my life, or you would I would say
absolutely not. I just told you a story. I told
you a story. I gave you some direction. I told
you what worked for me. You did the work, you
read the book, you did the exercises, you followed the path,
whatever it might have been. You took the course. And

(15:57):
so we just begin the conversation.

Speaker 1 (16:09):
Let's get into the nuts and bolts of this a
little bit. So, yes, you know what, what are the
key principles for you? That's like the foundation, the starting point.
Like someone says, I need to shift my life. I
need to change, you know, I obviously everybody's circumstances are different,

(16:30):
but I need help. I need to where you know,
like my my life feels like it's missing purpose. What
where do you start with with? You know, the people
you work with, or when you're talking, when you're when
you're when you're doing your motivational speaking.

Speaker 3 (16:47):
That actually is the first step them coming and saying
I need help. Whether they buy the ticket and come
to the talk, or they pick up the book, or
they listen to the podcast or whatever they do, that
is the first step because without that willingness and that
desire to change, nothing is possible. Oliver had to want
to go to Hoffmann.

Speaker 1 (17:08):
Right.

Speaker 3 (17:09):
Sometimes people are forced into recovery, but that often doesn't work.

Speaker 1 (17:13):
Right.

Speaker 3 (17:13):
What works is when you have the desire and the
will to change, And so that would be the first
step is really really claiming that and when you pick
up that book or when you show up in a
seminar go to Hoffmann. It's like signing a sacred contract
with the universe. It's saying I'm a yes for healing,
and that opens an invisible door. And then if you

(17:37):
stay in that yes, that would sort of be the
next step is like stay in that yes. So maybe
it's just simply sending it intention every day, saying I'm
ready for more healing, and I'm ready for a little
bit more healing, and I believe that genuine growth and
spiritual development and change the change that we want, whether

(17:58):
it's getting clean and sober, whether it's healing trus whether
it's healing from a relationship, whatever those changes are that
we want to quit in your life. They can't happen
like that. They have to be lots of little right actions.
And when we take those small, subtle steps every day,
then we start to literally change our neural pathways because

(18:19):
we're repeating something new, opening our minds to a different thoughtform,
and we're giving ourselves grace and compassion as we heal.
Because if you just try to like dive in rip
off the band aid, it's too extreme. It's way too
extreme for the parts of you that are not ready
for that.

Speaker 1 (18:35):
Yet yeah, it's like those small steps. I'm always like
everybody who has this, you know, I'm all for an
end game. I'm all for like you know, the three
year plan, the five year plan, the ten year plan.
Like I think it's good to have a sort of
like a long distance look, but you can't get to

(18:57):
any long distance if you're not taking those first few
steps and staying present in all of those steps, because
you're gonna pivot. There's gonna be detours, there's gonna be obstacles,
you know, and and so those little small things that
are the beginning steps, you don't even realize how powerful
they are. I remember, you know, usually for girls, it

(19:22):
seems like those moments happen out of relationships, Like you
have a relationship, it's gone south. They you know, you're
you're you have a series of bad relationships and then
you're finally like, I need to find myself for women,
and then what you realize when you really take certain

(19:43):
certain a deeper look is that there's things about your
life and your patterns that you haven't even recognized totally.
And what I like about some of the work that
you've done is like really leaning into some of those patterns,
right you do you like you're saying the first step

(20:03):
is like realizing why you're there, but then like we're
going to go deeper into what your own personal spiritual
path is totally.

Speaker 3 (20:14):
And I think also what you're saying is that whatever
your bottom might be, whether it's breaking up, whether in
a relationship or addiction or personal something. There's this beautiful
Ama quote that I love, and it's when an eggshell
cracks from the outside, it's broken, but when it cracks
from the inside, it's reborn. And so when we have

(20:35):
these moments of cracking open whatever. For me, I was
twenty five and I hit my knees and I was like, God,
I need a miracle and that opened the door for
my recovery or remembering a trauma, whatever it might be.
Those meltdown moments are the miracle moments. And so when
people are first starting out on this these types of journeys,

(20:56):
it's usually is when the shit hits the fan. It's like,
oh no, I don't I I broke up with that
and I can't go on and I want to die.
And it's those moments where we just literally can't breathe
that we're given that opening. When things are just sort
of functioning, we stay in that managing of our life,
and that is fine, but in my opinion, that's boring.

Speaker 2 (21:18):
I think, you know, well, it's funny you say that,
because you know I'm prone to anxieties since my twenties.
It's been crazy, fucking gnarly. And then I get through
it on lexapro. Then I went on, My story is
long and boring, but you know, I understand that world.
And I'm a hard worker. When I'm not feeling good,
I am meditating every day, I am writing gratitudes, I am.

Speaker 1 (21:41):
In the fucking bam.

Speaker 2 (21:43):
And then the minute I start to feel better, I'm like, great, done,
you know what I mean. But part of my wish
is and it's not a wish it just needs to
be done, is that I actually stick with it.

Speaker 3 (21:55):
Well, but that's what I's also answer to your wish.
Are you ready for us?

Speaker 2 (22:00):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (22:01):
If you dig it and if you're into it.

Speaker 2 (22:02):
Well.

Speaker 3 (22:03):
So one of the things is that everyone has that wish, right.
Everybody is sort of like, how do I say consistent?
How do I do one small thing to day? What
is that one small thing today? And so I've had
this built, this whole life around those one small things.
So I took all those little small things and it
put them actually started the Gabby Coaching app, and I'm

(22:23):
going to give it to you. And in the app,
it's like these little moments to just dip in and
tight right in and then go on with your day.
And then you type right in a little bit more
and you go on with your day. And I say
to my app users, it's really a coaching membership, right,
I say to them, Even if you just open the
app and listen to me read you the affirmation in
the morning, that's your small action. And so the consistency,

(22:47):
the consistency and sort of the repetition. I'm studying Spanish
with duo lingo, do.

Speaker 2 (23:00):
You have I was doing Italian on.

Speaker 3 (23:10):
Exactly, so you you know, sort of Spanish and and
so just like dual Lingo, I'm like, I'm really seeing
this app as sort of the self help dual lingo. Okay,
so like the less little less gamification. But you get
in and you just do a little bit every day
your studio DS see, so I don't ten minutes a day,

(23:33):
ten minutes a day, ten minutes a day, and that
is helping me in seven in four months, right, yeah,
so or to speak Spanish, Okay. Anyway, the point is
is that these little moments and these little things. So
I'm gonna give you the Gabby app.

Speaker 2 (23:50):
I'll make a.

Speaker 3 (23:51):
Meditation for you for anxiety. And the thing is there's
this whole section called the get Gabby section where you
can literally go in and it's like get Gabby and
in the section there's like feeling anxious is the first one,
and it's a two minute practice for anxiety. I can
teach it to today too, and then there's you know,
want to pick up a drink? Get Gabby.

Speaker 1 (24:11):
Right.

Speaker 3 (24:12):
This woman told me the other day that her daughter
was like sixteen, having anxiety. They've been using the app together,
and then her daughter was like screaming in the middle
that I think she was having a nightmare. And her
mother goes in and she was like half awake, half asleep,
and she was like, get Gabby. I was like, and
then I think that she did. I like, I literally

(24:33):
she'd turn on a meditation. They're going back to sleep.
But the point, the point is is that I wanted
to democratize these tools and make them like the duo
lingo for self help, because why should someone just because
they have the resources and the you know, the and
the ability to go to Hoffman, right, or the privilege
of being able to go to a Hoffman or the
resources to have a therapist or a life coach or whatever,

(24:54):
or even get into a yoga class. I mean, so
many people don't have that, and so to be able
to make this more accessible to people is my intention.
And those small right actions and staying consistent with them.

Speaker 1 (25:06):
Yeah, because you did your sort of like do you
still do your New Year's kind of You've.

Speaker 3 (25:13):
Been talking to Jen, haven't you?

Speaker 1 (25:15):
Yeah? I did it with Jen one year.

Speaker 3 (25:16):
You did it. I think I think that Jen Meyer
is my pro bono publicist. I mean probably all of ms. Frankly,
she loves people and she is just the most one
of the most beautiful humans I've ever met. But yeah,
I know she loves My manifesting challenge that's coming up
that it's actually in the app, so I'll give it
to you, give you that you can do it in

(25:37):
the app now, but it's it's twenty one days, which
hopefully would give somebody that inspiration to keep going.

Speaker 1 (25:46):
Well, let's talk about the manifesting challenge challenge. This is
fun sort of take Oliver and our listeners through, like
what what that is? So at the beginning of the year,
you do the Manifesting Challenge and it's basically I mean,
you explain it. I could explain it, but you explain it.

Speaker 3 (26:03):
I love that you did it.

Speaker 1 (26:04):
Yeay.

Speaker 3 (26:05):
January first is the first day of the year, and
it's a time when we're super primed and we're ready
and we're wanting to show up for ourselves. So I've
forever for about four or five years now, I've done
a twenty one day Manifesting Challenge. And it's small, like
five six, seven, maybe sometimes ten minute audio lessons followed

(26:27):
by some journaling prompts. Sometimes there's little things where you'll like,
you know, write a letter to the universe and bury it,
and there's like little actionable things. But it's it's fun
and it's actionable, but super deep. Like everything I do
is deep. It's it's it's just I'm a very good translator.
I'm really good at demystifying big things. So I am

(26:48):
a deep spiritual teacher who's really good at making complicated
things simple. And so that's what I'll do with these
these challenges, and it takes these concepts of really helping
you recondition your thinking and claim you're yes, what are
you a yes for? And open up to shifting your
energy and meditating on a vision and one day to time,

(27:10):
this cumulative effect of really owning what you desire, becoming
unapologetic about what you desire, bringing momentum to that desire,
bringing spiritual connection into your life. And people have reported
the most unbelievable results from the challenge, things like manifesting
babies and green cards and relationships and jobs, and even

(27:32):
some people reporting back like I lost my job and
that was the best manifestation ever because it put me
on the path of my purpose. And really the most
valuable results often are just the people that are like,
I feel spiritually connected.

Speaker 1 (27:44):
Now. Now for those who are skeptical about manifestation, because
I get that a lot, because I feel like I
feel like I've manifested everything in my life, but just

(28:04):
based in my almost almost like my personality profile, but
also because I'm very intentional in the things that I do.
So but when people are skeptical about manifestation, how do
you explain it to them? How do you define manifesting
to them.

Speaker 3 (28:22):
Simply put, every thought that we have has energy behind it.
So if you're thinking a high vibrational thought, you're elevating
your energy. You're elevating the energy of the people around you.
When you elevate the energy of the people around you,
you create more possibilities in your life. You attract more
people to you, you attract opportunities for employment, just you're

(28:42):
fun to be around. The more fun you have, the
more joy you bring, the more you connect to what
we all have, which is our super attractor power. And
that power is in all of us. We just either
block it or embrace it and magnify it. And so
we block it when we're addiction or in judgment or
in really just unhealthy states. And it's not that even

(29:08):
in the darkest moments, we can still be using manifesting principles.
Right So, at twenty five getting clean and sober, I
wanted to get clean. Was I manifesting a life beyond
my wildest dreams within the first ninety days of my recovery. No,
But what I was manifesting at that time was sobriety. Right. So,
in any no matter what our circumstances are, and this

(29:29):
may be really controversial, but even in the darkest moments,
you have examples like you have Gandhi or individuals who
have lived through extreme circumstances but have had extreme impact
because of the thought forms that they've chosen. Now, that's
not how I look for some of us who have

(29:50):
the privileges of being able to live these amazing lives
and have all of it in front of us. We
owe it to those who don't to really elevate our thoughts,
to elevate our energy, to enjoy our our lives. And
again it happens, it's available to us even when we're
in those dark moments. So it's proactively and consciously healing
our belief systems because we manifest what we believe. And

(30:13):
so we as we heal, as we go to Hoffmann,
as we listen to this episode, as we read a
self help book, or do a manifesting challenge, or commit
to twenty thirty days of yoga practice, whatever that may be,
we're committing to a new thought form. We're reprogramming the
neural pathways in our brain.

Speaker 1 (30:30):
We're changing, right, and now we know that those are science.
It's not science.

Speaker 2 (30:36):
Science science, right, Well, the manifesting part. Look, I go
both ways with this stuff. Like when I am in
like a sort of that dark hole that you're talking about,
the negativity sort of shifts or it comes into more
into my right into my face, right, and you think, oh,
everyone says, we'll just think positively, you know what I mean,
manifest this manifest that I'm like, Okay, that's a.

Speaker 3 (30:59):
Fuck you to who's having a biochemical.

Speaker 2 (31:02):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, no doubt, no doubt. But when I
do start to come out, I understand that letting go
really sort of just allows you to feel more at
ease in the day, and you're looking at things and
being having gratitude towards things that you normally wouldn't have,
which that in turn is being a positive person, and

(31:25):
your energy is better, it's bigger, it's out there right,
understand that I can feel that. But part of me, though,
is like with the manifest like, how come everyone's not rich?
How come everyone you know? How many humany you know?
But you know how many people think positively and try
to manifest and bring good things to them and really
and it just doesn't fucking happen. Right, So there's eight

(31:48):
billions of people in the world, there's a lot of
manifesting that's not happening.

Speaker 3 (31:52):
There's two things. There's two questions. So first of all,
I think that what you're saying about having when someone's
having a biochemical condition like getting disorder or depression, to
say to that person, meditate or think better thoughts, that's
literally like the biggest fuck you to that person. And
so for me, I didn't understand that until I lived it.

(32:13):
I lived I had suicidal postpartum depression, which really just
magnified an anxiety disorder that I didn't even that had
been managing for so many years. And so while I
was not able to really tune into my super attractor
power in the darkest moment of my life, what I
could do was consistently lean into I want to get

(32:37):
more help. I want to get more help. And as
I started to consistently open my heart to more and
more help, I manifested help. And so even though you
may think, Okay, well I'm in this dark moment, but
I'm not manifesting, Well, what are you trying to manifest?
You can't be at your lowest load trying to manifest
like complete and utter transformation. You can manifest help you're.

Speaker 1 (32:55):
Like, God, I'm really depressed, Like I want to manifest
Rolls Royce.

Speaker 2 (33:00):
I did when I was I think when I was
doing Namo Hold and get Coo and I was Doingddhism
and I was in that world for six months with
my ex girl friend Vanessa. Eventually I was going all
these meetings. I'm like, I don't like this. Someone's like,
do you want like a new roles just say, I'm
not joking. That happened all the time.

Speaker 1 (33:21):
Maybe you're going the wrong meetings.

Speaker 3 (33:24):
Well, there's a lot of like bs spirituality out there,
and so you can get people in the door. When
you say manifesting, you say the law of attraction. You
tell people about the power that they have. But my
intention isn't to teach people magic tricks. My attention is
to teach people how to change the way that they feel.
The simplest thing is when you change how you feel,

(33:44):
that's how you change your life.

Speaker 1 (33:45):
Right, Yeah, I mean I think sometimes the brain when
when you know, I think some teachers will say, when
you desire an outcome, if you focus on that outcome, oh,
you know, keep focusing on that outcome. I want to
be let's just let's just say I want to be
a of I want to be a Nobel Piece Prize winner.

(34:10):
I want to be a Nobel I want to win
a Nobel prize. I want to win it. I want
to What happens is is that as you start doing
certain manifestation practices kind of veers you away from this
concept and and what it should be doing. If you're
with either the right teacher or you're doing the right
you're inside of the practice in the right way, is

(34:31):
that all of a sudden it leans you into the
things in your life that you that you do need
more of, like oh, like I want to be more
open and curious, or like I want to read more.
I want I oh, I'm actually far more interested in
reading this book than I am watching this program on television.
It starts to shift the focuses, and then that endgame

(34:54):
prize isn't what you're manifesting. You're actually manifesting a better
way for you, a desire to live. I think that's
I think that's because this idea like oh, I'm going
to manifest like the great you know, like ultimate wealth,
Like that's not what it's gonna You're not you.

Speaker 2 (35:11):
Know, I know people do try to do that.

Speaker 1 (35:14):
I'm just saying that's That's sort of where the skepticism
of this concept of manifestation. When you say, like, oh,
I'm going to manifest, manifesting is this idea that you know,
when you think of something, when you put when you
put the this is my own personal relationship to it,
when you put it in a momentum to move forward,

(35:35):
it's telling your brain, oh, this is the direction in
which we're moving. And when you say I need help,
that's the direction in which your brain starts to move.

Speaker 2 (35:46):
And I'm playing Devil's advocate, meaning I practice all of
these things, you know, But at the same time, I'm
a realist and a spiritualist. If that's even a word.

Speaker 1 (35:54):
You manifested your boat, well, I just asked a lot.

Speaker 2 (36:00):
But my point, though, is just more of a realistic
look at it. When you have this many people in
the world who are trying to manifest and who are
who are doing it, you know, but the best intentions
and it just isn't working, you know what I mean,
They're not.

Speaker 3 (36:14):
I think that really the secretive manifesting is to forget
what you think you need and really focus on how
you feel. Because when we are in a space that's
free inside, and we feel unburdened from our past, and
we've done the work, the inner work, to heal that

(36:36):
wreckage from our past and to come out the other side.
That's when we reclaim who we really are. We reclaim
that innocence that we were born with, because when we're born,
we're really we're born into this world and then we
pick up all of these different experiences that some of
which are super extreme. Some are more extreme than others,

(36:57):
but they're still extreme nevertheless, and they become these feelings
that we just try to manage and override for the
rest of our life. With anxiety or with addiction, or
with relationships, what manage, manage, manage, and that just blocks
that natural innocence. So when we actually do start to
do the heavy lifting of really therapeutic support, self help

(37:18):
support and being in that curious, as Kate said, beautifully
curious connection inward, that's when we start to feel a
shift inside. And that shift is what manifests, not some
vision board and that's some repeated thought, it's the inner

(37:38):
change inside of you. And so there's a lot that
I was able to manifest in my life because I
believed it, and because I was moving towards it and
take taking actions towards it. But the greatest manifestations in
my life have been the ones that have just come
into my life naturally, in a free flowing state, just
feeling and trusting. And there's this beautiful message. I keep

(38:02):
quoting all these beautiful messages, but there's one that is
from this text of course and miracles and the messages.
Those who are certain of the outcome can afford to
wait and wait without anxiety.

Speaker 2 (38:13):
Mm hm.

Speaker 3 (38:14):
And so when we just start to have you to
our inner world, when we say that, yeah, those who
are certain of the outcome can afford to wait and
wait without anxiety. Right, And that certainty.

Speaker 2 (38:28):
Only comes I'm not certain of the outcome.

Speaker 1 (38:32):
Well, there is one out This is where I go.

Speaker 3 (38:34):
Yes, the outcome being when we do that work on ourselves,
that we and we start to recognize freedom. Really, to
me means that we recognize that no thing, no amount
of money, success, person, lover, will give us the freedom

(38:55):
inside that we desire. I know that, and I shall
have free right. It's the devotional commitment to healing the
wounds in the blocks that hold you back from living
in that freedom. And that's why I write self help
books because I know that not everybody's going to have
you know, DEEPOK on speed dial like I might write,

(39:17):
or like be able to you know, have a mother
like we had. That that's not the norm. The norm
is push it down, numb it out, don't feel it.

Speaker 1 (39:27):
I think it's also it's also really interesting when you
when you do, when you're like, I'm a I love
to travel, I love to see the world. I love
to go to you know, I love to talk to
people all over the world. And what you realize is
like it doesn't at the end of the day, when
you get to the like core, the spiritual core of
every single human, it doesn't matter where. You can't gauge

(39:54):
someone's trauma or someone's pain, or someone's anxiety, or someone's
like why they feel liberated or why are they so happy?
Why do they find such contentment? You can go all
around the world and see people of completely different socioeconomic backgrounds,
completely different cultures, and you can tell there are just

(40:17):
doesn't matter what you have or where you come from.
There are certain people who are who who are connected
to their spiritual core brings them a sense of contentment
and liberation that someone who seemingly has it all can't
quite grasp.

Speaker 3 (40:34):
Oh yeah, I mean how many people do you know?
You guys know so many people who have it all
and they're fucking miserable. I imagine that you know them all, right,
So yeah, it's a really yeah.

Speaker 1 (40:45):
I mean yeah, no, no, of course I think I
find it. I find so lucky just breathing and living right.
But what I'm trying to say is I'm trying to
say like that is something I think everybody, no matter
where you come from or what your experience are. Of
course that is if you know, taking you know, trauma,
certain kinds of trauma out of the equation, but that

(41:09):
there is a very relatable thing across the board, which
is people actually connecting to that place inside of them
that makes them feel truly liberated. That can only truly
exist in the simplest form of how we live spiritually.

Speaker 3 (41:23):
I can really just speak for myself and that I
can say that the spiritual foundation is the thing that's
carried me throughout my life through a lot of ups
and downs and sometimes things that I wouldn't wish upon anyone.
But it was when I committed to really becoming courageous
and brave enough to connect to the parts of myself

(41:45):
that I had been pushing down for a lifetime for decades.
When I made that commitment to courageously turn inward, that's
when that freedom started to come into my life. And
that was spiritual recovery, therapeutic recovery, addiction recovery, and literally
what I'm most proud of in about myself is my

(42:10):
courage to change, my courage to heal. And I wrote this.
My ninth book was a book called Happy Days, and
it's the guided Path from trauma to profound freedom and
inner piece. And I've written a lot of manifesting books
right like I've written A Universe has your Back, I'm
super Attractor, it may cause miracles, and all these books
I'm manifesting, and people love those books. They want the universe,

(42:33):
they want the super attractor. But when I hold up
Happy Days, which is like a book that maybe didn't
sell as well as o other manifesting books, but I
can hold that book and I can say to somebody,
this is my greatest manifesting book that I have. Why
because it teaches you how to do the inner work.
You could do all that manifesting spiritual and you will

(42:54):
have change. But the lifetime change, the massive radical change,
happens when you start to dress the parts of you
that live in fear, the parts of you that are
so anxious, the parts of you that need your attention.

Speaker 2 (43:06):
Oh yeah, and by the way, you know it's not
a one and done and I know that just even
from being an Hoffman like you can dig up and
you can go through this process, which I did, and
there's this euphoria that you feel for like two or
three weeks. It's this honeymoon phase, and then all of
a sudden, life creeps back in. You know, when it's
that deep, you're always going to be dealing with it.
And that's what they tell you too when you go there.

(43:26):
They're like, you're not cured, No one's cured. You're just
given the tools to deal with this shit as it
comes up. Now, you know you've done the work, you've
done the digging, you've uncovered the treasure.

Speaker 1 (43:35):
So to speak, and the discovered that the relationship to
the work can be interesting and enjoyable and rewarding.

Speaker 2 (43:43):
Sure, and extremely difficult and angering right because you're like,
oh my god, why am I like this again, what happened? Yeah,
you know, because it's work, you have to keep working.

Speaker 1 (43:55):
Again, We're like, this is like the quoting episode, but
like I all also, one of my favorite quotes is
contentment is a discipline. And I find that what you're saying,
even if it's one little thing, but like those disciplines
that you know that you connect with, that make you,
that connect you deeper to yourself, or make you just
feel a little bit better, make you feel like you're

(44:17):
in that forward movement in motion.

Speaker 2 (44:19):
Well, I have a quote that I'm going to make
that right now, which is another which is another way
to live by. In a hundred million years, we're all
going to be a ball of fire. So who gives
a shit anyway?

Speaker 3 (44:30):
Yeah?

Speaker 2 (44:31):
Yeah, I mean, I mean that's it's kind of it's
like sometimes.

Speaker 3 (44:35):
I do that in my head.

Speaker 2 (44:36):
I'm like, well, we all have these issues, we're all
feeling these things, but in fifty million years, it's gonna
be a big ball of fire. Civilization will no longer exist,
and all of these problems like why am I so crazy?

Speaker 3 (44:47):
Why are we all?

Speaker 1 (44:48):
Why are we all so nuts? Yeah? No, it's a
good that's a good. I mean, look we've been asking
ourselves that from the beginning of Time books.

Speaker 2 (44:55):
It's called ball of Fire.

Speaker 1 (44:58):
You're qualifier.

Speaker 3 (45:00):
We got to let you go.

Speaker 2 (45:01):
What do you think about the qualifier theory?

Speaker 3 (45:03):
I think you might want to consider writing a self
help book. And I'm totally serious right now, and I
will totally help you if you wanted to do this,
write a self help book about the ballifier. Yeah, and
let it be just about really what it should be.

Speaker 1 (45:21):
It should be only animated though. It should just be
a picture book.

Speaker 2 (45:29):
I like Bullifier.

Speaker 3 (45:31):
Bullifier is good.

Speaker 2 (45:33):
It's a good title. I'm telling you I like it.

Speaker 1 (45:35):
Gabby for the last question, thank you so much for
joining us. I'm so happy. Can we talk to you
more offline?

Speaker 2 (45:44):
At some point, qualifier collapse is going to be huge.

Speaker 3 (45:48):
But I just break the forward. I'll write the forward.

Speaker 2 (45:50):
Okay, perfect, perfect.

Speaker 1 (45:52):
Okay, So well, let's just start with this. I like
this question, which is in the context of this rapidly
changing world, speaking of a world on fire, how do
you see the role of spirituality and personal development in

(46:14):
contributing to the global consciousness?

Speaker 3 (46:16):
Thank you for this question. I really appreciate it. I
think it's go time. I think that those of us
who have made a commitment to do in their work
in whatever form that comes, whether it's through books and
broadcast widely, or even individually in your home putting your

(46:38):
child to bed at night. Those of us who have
had the privilege of being cracked open in whatever form
that is, and opened up to a spiritual connection or
personal growth connection, it is our duty to share it.
It is spiritual activism. When we tell a story, when
we make that change, we ignite that light in somebody else.

(47:00):
And so there's a lot of darkness that we need
to transcend and transmute. And I don't believe that can
happen with one spiritual teacher, one author, one person. I
think it happens on the individual level. I think it
happens with anyone who's listened to this episode today and
is like, I want to, you know, let that energy

(47:22):
move through me. I'm going to take something I learned
here and share it with somebody today, or even share
the episode right or go to Hoffmann, whatever it might
have been. That inner shift happening for anyone listening has
to be shared, and that's how it happens. That's how
that shift occurs, because it has to happen on a big,
big global level. Mm hmm yeah, thank you Jaby. You

(47:44):
guys are so cute. I love you. Nice to be
with you.
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