September 6, 2023 • 46 mins
Today’s episode is a live reading with Seattle Seahawks In-Game Host, Carla Marie!
Amanda’s reading reveals insights on:
- Self-reliance and trust issues
- Taking things off your plate to make room for your talents
- Asking your soul to help you make tough decisions
- Love that allows individuality
- Finding richness in life
- Investigating yourself and soul searching
Carla Marie gets vulnerable and asks Amanda the big questions that have been weighing on her:
- What’s next for her career?
- Will she ever have children?
- Is she going to move back home to be near her family?
A great tip from Amanda:
Surround yourself with joyful people who make you laugh and feel light-hearted so you take yourself less seriously & have more fun!
Tune into the Carla Marie & Anthony Show on Twitch on Thursday, September 14th at 8am PT / 11am ET for a chance to get a live reading from Amanda during their show!
HOST: Amanda Rieger Green // @SoulPathology
GUEST: Carla Marie // @TheCarlaMarie
Carla Marie is the in-game host for the Seattle Seahawks, host of the Carla Marie & Anthony Show on Twitch, and host of The Morning Show Podcast (a show that gives you everything you need to start your day in under 25 minutes)!
Follow Amanda on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/soulpathology/
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:08):
Hi, everyone, It's Amanda Rieger Green. Welcome to The Soul's
Sessions podcast. Today we are doing a live reading and
my guest who's agreed to show up and have her
reading on air is Carla Marie. Carla Marie is the
host of Carla Marie and Anthony's show on Twitch and
(00:29):
The Morning Show Podcast, a podcast that gives you everything
you need to start your day in under twenty five minutes.
She's also the in game host for the Seattle Seahawks.
You can follow her on Instagram at the Carla Marie Welcome.
Speaker 2 (00:46):
Hi.
Speaker 3 (00:47):
I can't believe I'm here right now.
Speaker 1 (00:49):
I'm so excited. Have you ever had a psychic reading?
Speaker 3 (00:52):
I've had? Is it called a flame reading.
Speaker 1 (00:55):
Like a twin flame like about love and stuff that.
Speaker 2 (00:58):
My friend did it format it's something where you take
the flame of a candle and use the burn and
you you do something and it was.
Speaker 3 (01:05):
Like super quick, super short. But that's it.
Speaker 2 (01:07):
But I'm so intrigued by this. I've always just been
so nervous. Yeah, so I'm here and I'm ready.
Speaker 1 (01:13):
Well, don't worry. I will say you at ease. And
also the way that I read is I meet Amanda
I step aside, and your soul starts to come through,
which is the utter essence of you. So it innately
feels comfortable. It feels like you're at home in your
own skin. Essentially all the things that you know about
yourself that sometimes you can't even put words to their
(01:34):
impressions and feelings, all the things like that.
Speaker 3 (01:37):
So please tell me about it.
Speaker 1 (01:38):
We have to We have to share something really cool
to begin with. So my producer and I were back
and forth and talking about having you on as a
guest the other morning, and she reached out to you
via text, and y'all were in the middle of your
show and we're apparently talking about me at the same
time she texts, So we were all on the same wavelength.
Speaker 3 (02:00):
It was wild.
Speaker 2 (02:01):
We were live on our show and I was saying
how I was going to possibly do this with you,
and how we wanted to get you on our live
show on Twitch to read for our audience, And it
was in that exact moment that I got that text,
and I was like, well, we have to do this
because the universe said something.
Speaker 1 (02:16):
The universe said so and divine timing and alignment and
then making things happen quickly. That's I'm going to just
start reading because they're giving me information. That's one of
the things that you're very good at. You are good
at executing. You're an executor. You've been very good at
jumping in and playing ball, so to speak. I mean,
you also are very competitive, but you're mostly competitive with yourself.
But you like to roll up your sleeves and you'll
(02:38):
tackle anything that comes down the pipes. The other thing
they're showing me at the same time is you have
this maturity and this high level of responsibility where sometimes
it's hard for you to just be totally loose and free.
And freedom is a big story for you in this
lifetime where you feel that you can really be yourself,
(02:58):
be quirky because you are quirky, by the way, and
you're intelligent, and you're quirky, and you're easily you easily
relate to people. You know this already, but you but
but being true to yourself, but in all of your quirkiness,
all your idiosyncrasies, yet feeling relatable. I mean, that is
that's a huge part of your story. But back to
the responsibility, does that make sense? You were born with
(03:20):
I'm gonna get it done. I'm gonna get it done myself,
and sometimes stubborn. You are stubborn.
Speaker 3 (03:24):
Yeah, I don't.
Speaker 2 (03:25):
I don't like asking for help. And if I do
and it's not done immediately, I'll just do it.
Speaker 3 (03:30):
Yeah, myself.
Speaker 2 (03:31):
It's not my best trait, but it does get things done.
Speaker 1 (03:33):
It does get things done. And interestingly enough, you are
in a phase where this is a year of practicing
some patients and trusting in relationships, and you have some
trust issues. I mean kind of some big ones. And
I mean and it's not that you don't have good
friends and people that you trust, but trust is one
of those things in this lifetime where you are going
to be let down, you are going to be disappointed.
(03:54):
But finding resiliency in that does that resonate a little bit?
Speaker 2 (03:58):
Yeah, I mean it's not trust is that I think
people are out to get me. It's just more of like,
I'll do it on my own. I'll be on my
own and I'll be fine.
Speaker 1 (04:05):
Okay, So extreme self reliance, self sufficiency. So back to
the trust piece of that. It's trusting that somebody is
gonna do something and whether they do it to your
standard or not. Because you have very high standards, is
being able to let people show up and either do
it well or mess up, and find some flexibility in
that versus always taking everything on because at some point,
(04:27):
while yes, it's important to be responsible and independent and
you are very independent, but also feeling like you don't
have the weight of the world on your shoulders. And
this year has kind of felt like that. Even though
you achieve things at a high level and you get
things done well, it also can feel almost like a
burden of responsibility or gosh, I have to get all
(04:48):
this done. Nobody's gonna do it. I'm gonna do it
on my own. I know I can do it well.
So there's an element of you just pushing through, and
it's being able to find some kind of like okay
flow versus feeling like it's box checking energy. And there's
nothing wrong with box checking, but do you get does
that resonate.
Speaker 3 (05:05):
Every day of my life?
Speaker 2 (05:06):
And I've always lived like that, but this year it
truly has gotten so bad. And we're trying to get
into a better routine now and it's slowly starting to happen,
but it's kind of take that what you just explained
has taken over my life and has made it harder
for me to actually do things because of that.
Speaker 1 (05:25):
Okay, so back to trust. Back to trust, it's you know,
getting up and saying, hey, here's what I need you
to do, here's what I need it done. Can you
handle this for me? Are you going to be able
to accomplish it? Do you need anything else for me?
Like it almost like here's what I need, here are
the facts. Can you do this for me? Can you
do it within this timeframe? Is there anything else you
(05:45):
need for me? And then it's almost like let go
and let god kind of energy and if they don't
follow through, follow up, then you respond. Then you use
your resiliency and know that the whole world is not
going to fall apart, that you're not going to to
be doomed, you know, to failure, which you're not. But
you are a perfectionist and you want to succeed. I mean,
(06:07):
success is a huge part of your storyline. And also respect.
Respect is a big thing for you. Is I am respectful?
I want to be respected in my field in what
I do. And also they're talking about your intellect because
you're very intelligent, but sometimes you're like, are people gonna
think I'm smart?
Speaker 2 (06:28):
Enough.
Speaker 1 (06:28):
Are they going to think I'm competent enough. So that's
sometimes why the responsibility piles up, because it's like, I
can do it. I can prove to myself I can
get all this done. And you're out growing that. You've
proved it your experience, your track record already tells the tale.
But it's like, you know, you're in a version of
yourself a handful of years ago where you were really
in the climb, and now it's like, Okay, I've got
(06:51):
to step back a little bit and realign. Does that resonate?
Speaker 2 (06:55):
Yeah? And it came from a lot of there was
a lot of doubt put on me, and I think
it kind of I always get pulled back into it
a bit, and every time I get a new challenge
or a new project that I get to work on,
I'm like, oh, but maybe maybe they're regretting hiring me,
or maybe it shouldn't have been been me. So I'm
gonna work harder.
Speaker 3 (07:14):
To prove that I do deserve this. So yes, And.
Speaker 1 (07:18):
First of all, you do deserve the things you've worked for.
And I mean, and I know you've worked hard and
you like to work hard. Everything in your energy field
says that, but this is also a time of unburdening
yourself and working smarter, not harder. And this is what
they're reflecting back. I heard an interview Gosh years ago
when Michelle Obama wrote her book Becoming, which is a
(07:41):
really brilliant book, by the way, but she was talking
about box checking. And I'm a list maker and a
box checker. I love doing that. I love to scratch
things off my to do list. But there comes a
time when you're just box checking, and it's transactional versus
accomplishing things, feeling fulfilled, feeling like you're just showing up
up and finding a deeper sense of usefulness in it,
(08:03):
versus box checking just to get things done, versus with
a meaning or a why behind it. That's what's shifting
in you innately right now.
Speaker 2 (08:12):
And a lot of times I'll have that list, that
box checking list, and be like, I have all of
these things to do, Like how do I even get
it done?
Speaker 3 (08:19):
How do you?
Speaker 2 (08:20):
Like?
Speaker 3 (08:20):
How do you tackle that?
Speaker 2 (08:22):
So yeah, being more mindful of you, I'm doing what'd
be a little bit better.
Speaker 1 (08:25):
Well, And I tell you what, this is funny because
you have a very quick, kind of snarky wit you
have a sinister sense of humor. By the way it's
all over I'm like you and I would be friends
and we would have the same I'm just gonna say it,
kind of raunchy sense of humor and a playful I mean,
you are. I can see it all over your field.
But what they're showing me is even on your to
(08:47):
do list. Like when you're making your list and it
has all these you know, things that you're stretching for
and reaching for and pushing yourself for whatever it is,
put some stuff on your list that is almost absurd
or silly. You know, today, I need to go to
the grocery store and buy energy drinks and I'm gonna
(09:08):
do that. So well, it's almost like put some things
on your list that stop you in your tracks so
you don't feel like you're taking yourself so seriously, because
that's what's being unbridled from you right now is being
able to freaking enjoy what you do. And it's not
that you don't enjoy it, but it's like, Okay, I
can enjoy it for a little bit, then I gotta
work really hard, enjoy it, work, prove myself and listen,
(09:30):
I am all about I have to prove myself. I
have to show everybody I really know what I'm doing.
So I resonate with that. But they are saying it's
about you. I mean, just meeting the moment and enjoying
the heck out of yourself, because that's what is coming
in the next couple of years, is this sense of empowerment,
but empowerment through a lighter heart, and also being flexible
(09:53):
with yourself, like forgiving of yourself, graceful with yourself instead
of like holding on to the steering wheel with a
tight grip.
Speaker 2 (10:00):
Graceful is not great. That describes me, ever, so I'll
work on that one well.
Speaker 1 (10:05):
And listen if graceful doesn't describe you, and which is
not surprising, because you are you know, you're very formulaic,
which means you know it has those kind of linear,
more masculine vibes, and you are very compassionate. You are
highly sensitive. I mean, you have a lot of truly
creative and feminine and intuitive traits, but right now they're
(10:26):
like way in the background at the bottom of the
totem pole. And when you start accessing and harnessing your creativity,
your joy, your lightheartedness, your ability to go with the
darn flow. It's like you are going to become a
professional surfer. It's like riding the waves and you will
feel like you're in your flow. So that's really important. Okay,
(10:48):
let's talk about career. What do you want to know?
They're talking to me a little bit about career. We're
going to talk about love in a minute, because they
are talking about that too. But what do you want
to know about? Let's start with work stuff first. Anything
you want to know? What do you want to know about?
Let's start with work stuff first. Anything you want to know.
Speaker 2 (11:07):
So, my career has been kind of wild. I had
a kind of a like as a long career in radio.
I did ten years, but I haven't been in radio
in three years. I've been kind of doing everything digitally.
My partner and I we do our own show on
Twitch and everything. I got the thing with the Seahawks,
and I think my biggest question for myself right now
in my life is but what is going to stick?
(11:27):
What is the one thing that is going to be
the most successful, or where do I need to put
my energy towards because it's going to three to four
different things right now.
Speaker 3 (11:37):
As my career as one thing.
Speaker 2 (11:40):
So everything I have is going to the show, the podcast,
the Seahawks, working on our apparel line. But I'm like,
where do I need to take most of the energy
and put it? And is it even any.
Speaker 3 (11:49):
Of this stuff?
Speaker 1 (11:50):
Do you like sports?
Speaker 3 (11:52):
I do enjoy sports.
Speaker 2 (11:53):
It wasn't until I got in with the Seahawks that
I really actually fell in love with.
Speaker 1 (11:57):
Okay, parts all you just said, you just answered your
question because they asked me. They asked me, They said,
ask her she liked sports, and I was like, okay,
and I fell in love with You have a synergy there,
and you are really good live on your feet and
you know this even though you're a prepper and you create,
you know your outline or you get ready. I mean,
(12:17):
you do prep but you are really good in the moment.
And this goes back to that proving yourself experience thing.
When you show up and you are on the fly,
you tap into something higher because you have no choice,
but not do you know what I mean, Because you're
gonna show up on and like jump in. That's who
you've been since you were a little girl. Even if somebody,
(12:38):
if somebody says you can't do it, you're gonna do it.
If somebody says this is too difficult, oh no, not
for me. I'll show you. So there's an adrenaline rush
that you love that can scare the heck out of you,
but it motivates you, and when you do it, you
almost have to solely let go. So something about sports
and live commentear live interactions. They keep saying, you have
(13:04):
some opportunities that will generate pretty rapidly from that, and
next year is a year of decision making, but even
deeper than that discernment, meaning it's both head and heart.
And so right now, listen where your money is is. Yes,
you have lots of irons in the fire and you're
following through on all of them, and you're exhausted. Okay,
(13:25):
we know this, but you're showing up and doing amazingly
and you're supposed to be a little scattered right now,
you know what I mean. Let yourself be a little
scattered and overwhelmed and make sure you find some downtime,
even little pockets of it. But what they're saying is
really start listening to your gut instincts like, oh gosh,
(13:46):
I don't feel like doing this today. When you get
up in the morning and you're looking at that list
and you're like, oh, I've got to get these show
notes ready, h and listen, I'm not throwing shade on
any of that stuff. Now. This is about you in
your I've at time saying Okay, I just had a
gut visceral reaction that was I mean, notice that, and
(14:07):
and and you don't have to change anything in the moment,
just say, okay, what is it about it that exhausts me.
I'm gonna do it because I follow through and I'm accountable,
But what is it that is exhausted in me? Is
it the administrative piece of things? You're outgrowing some admin
in some things. That's also what needs to be delegated
off your place, which relates to trust, finding people you
(14:29):
trust to do administrative things one hundred percent. That is
your level of play over the course of the next
five or six months is finding someone administratively that you
can delegate to, that you can allow to take things
off your plate, so it creates time for your talents,
so you can start shooting up that creativity that spark
that fire versus all of the linear thinking that that's
(14:52):
kind of imposing on you. Makes sense. Yes, So the
discernment is like noticing you're like writing it down, noticing
the to do list, and notice when you go, ugh,
you know or I can't. Oh gosh, I don't feel
like that. Okay, let me just get it done. When
you do that, just say okay. And then also just
take a minute, because you move at a pretty fast pace,
(15:14):
take a minute to just breathe, to literally just process
whatever the like you identify as the emotional component of it.
So if it's overwhelmed, annoyance, you know, oh, frustration, that
kind of thing, just inhale and exhale that so you
hold a little space for it, and that'll create a
greater pathway between those eighteen inches between your head and
(15:37):
your heart.
Speaker 3 (15:38):
You said next year is the year of decision making.
Speaker 2 (15:39):
Yeah, and that, Yeah, that gave me that reaction of like, no, no, no,
I don't want to have to do it.
Speaker 3 (15:44):
I hate having to make decisions like.
Speaker 1 (15:46):
That because you don't want to let anybody down. Yeah,
that's what it is, and it's I mean, hello, you
are a piscey, so you all are deep feelers, but
you also take on all the energy of the collective.
But this is about not letting yourself down and also
knowing you're not a bridge burner. You know that's not
really your jam, and you're gonna give notice and you're
gonna whatever it is. And I'm not, you know, like
(16:08):
laying anything out perfectly right now. But when things start
to bubble up and you get all the fear around
communicating your truth, that's when. And this is probably your
rocket ship into another dimension of living, thinking and being
is trusting God, trusting your higher power and saying, hey, God,
hey soul, I'm nervous, I'm worried about having these tough
(16:31):
conversations and making these decisions. Help me. I can't do
it on my own. And that right there, over and
over again, because you are so self reliant. You know,
you know this like you, you and you. It's felt
good for a long time. It gave you adrenaline and
it worked and it also developed. It's part of a
coping mechanism, it's part of innately who you are. But
(16:51):
it's not your story today. So when you say, hey,
I am at my wits end, God, can you sort
this stuff out? Because humanly I just can't. I can't.
You can kind of energy, let go, Let God however
you want to think of it. But the more you
do that and say, I don't I don't know how
to figure this out right now, but I believe that
there's a way forward that's clear, and that it's gonna
feel freeing and true, freeing and true.
Speaker 3 (17:15):
I love that.
Speaker 1 (17:15):
Okay, let's talk about love. Are you single?
Speaker 3 (17:21):
I am not, you're not.
Speaker 1 (17:22):
But are you married?
Speaker 3 (17:23):
Nope?
Speaker 1 (17:24):
I didn't think so. I was like, you're not married,
but but you're so individualistic like whomever you are with
and you'll have to tell me your partner's name in
a minute. But whomever you are with, both of you
have to have your lives. I mean, like it is
so do you know what I mean? You do not
like clingy codependent?
Speaker 2 (17:40):
No?
Speaker 1 (17:40):
I mean it is like you have your interdependence, which
is a healthy thing, but then sometimes it can also
backfire a little bit. But like you have to have
your space. So it's like they keep showing me you
in this bubble and we'll let's talk about it in
a minute. What's your partner's name?
Speaker 2 (17:54):
So remember when you said I was the host of
the Carla, Marie and Anthony Show.
Speaker 3 (17:58):
Is anything? Okay?
Speaker 1 (17:59):
I haven't even listened the show. Everybody.
Speaker 3 (18:01):
Yeah, that's great.
Speaker 1 (18:01):
I'm had and I didn't before, like we connected, I
haven't listened before because I like to I don't like
to know these things.
Speaker 2 (18:08):
So okay, so Anthony, we need our own space because
we are also together working all the time.
Speaker 1 (18:14):
Okay, all right, Okay. One of the things they're showing
me is you two do work together, but you do
need your space and you do need your energy. And
one of the things about this Seahawks deal that's exciting
for you is you feel like you get to go
out and spread your wings, challenge yourself play and it
feels like it's yours and it's not. You know, it's
(18:35):
I mean, you too have a very healthy relationship. You
just are also working with finding the balance between work
and life, work and personal life and those boundaries and
where that is. The other thing is to he really
appreciates your input. He's really good at listening to your input.
They just said, does that resonate?
Speaker 2 (18:55):
Yes, that is we were best friends before we started
dating or even working together any of it, And yeah,
that's always who he's been supportive and.
Speaker 1 (19:04):
Just yeah, yeah, I love it, And I mean, they're
showing me that because not all partners are good listeners.
And he does, and he hears you, and he figure
out figures out a lot of times how to respond
and and it's like he really is contemplative in that way.
And you also there this are making me smile about this,
Like at home and you know, your intimate and your
(19:24):
private time with him, you can unleash you're crazy and
he lets you unleash it, like like I mean, like
I can't handle it, like when you explode, because when
you're pushed to a brink, you blow and it's and
you are compassionate and loving and passionate, but when you
have pushed it down and been working and you're exhausted,
(19:47):
it blows. And he knows to be like, Okay, you know,
I'll see you later or I'll He's pretty he's learned
to be able to do that and give you your space.
Speaker 2 (19:57):
Yeah, he definitely does that, whether it is work related
or personal, family, whatever it is.
Speaker 3 (20:02):
It's kind of like a do you need time or
what do you need me to do? Or how are
we going to fix this?
Speaker 2 (20:06):
Yes, he's not very reactive, which sometimes is frustrating, but yeah.
Speaker 1 (20:10):
Okay, anything you want to know.
Speaker 2 (20:12):
Relationship wise well, since unfortunately he's und here to defend himself.
But I think one of the things I have questioned
my whole life is if I want to have kids
or not. And I'm now thirty five years old, still
unsure if I want to have kids. I'm not against it,
I just don't know if I want or I don't
(20:32):
know if it's going to happen.
Speaker 1 (20:33):
I'm forty two and I'm the same way. If I
had a child, I know it'd be a great mom
and I would jump in and all the things. If
I don't, I'm kind of like, Okay, that may be
the story too. You're very similar that way. And one
of the things they're showing me is you came into
this lifetime to learn to be the child to mother yourself,
(20:54):
because you came in very adult like and very responsible.
So you're learning to be more childlike as an adult.
And I don't mean immature, I mean joyful, lighthearted, playful,
and one of the things, by the way, and this
doesn't answer that, but it answers that one of the
best things you can do for your soul, for your
personal enrichment and happiness is surround yourself by friendships and
(21:16):
relationships that make you lighthearted and laugh. People that are funny, joyful,
just not don't have a care in the world, but
seem to just show up and not take themselves too seriously.
Those people are the greatest role models for you on
a personal and a spiritual level. So one of the
(21:38):
things they're showing me is until you know how to
almost mother yourself and allow yourself to be the playful, creative,
wondrous child, you will not know whether or not you
truly want to be a mother or not. And can
you be Yes, you can, But it's almost like your
career and your work is your child. The other thing
(22:00):
I mean, like, yeah, you loved it an art time. Yeah,
that's what they just said. So and I had I
had a psychic tell me years ago when this came up.
She said, well, Amanda, I said, you know, whatever will
be will be. And she said, but Amanda, you you
know you do have this point of attraction and ability
to say, Okay, if I want a child, and maybe
I can't do it biologically, I can adopt. But that
(22:22):
has never aligned. It just you know, there's a history
behind that, but it hasn't aligned yet. But I'm also
getting very comfortable with the fact that I may not
have biological children of my own, but I have children
in my life that I get to show up and
nurture and be a guide to. You will have that, yeah,
And you're great at it, and you're great with kids,
(22:43):
and kids love you and you're fun, like you're fun
when you're with kids. So that's what I'm saying, is
like more play, more childlike wonder and bringing that out
in yourself. But you do have the choice to be
a mother or not. But I almost don't think that
you will have children. I'm just gonna tell you what
they're telling me. I mean, and I feel like, at
the core of your soul, it's like I think I
would be good, you know, really having this life of
(23:06):
me being at the center of things. And I don't
mean that superficially, saying that with so much love, because
that's what your soul is like, just say it. She
wants she wants to be the child and the adult
and everything in between. That's your truth. Yeah, that's your truth.
Speaker 3 (23:22):
I don't disagree with that.
Speaker 1 (23:25):
Yeah, well that's a big question to ask, and you know,
and putting that out there vulnerably, I mean, just having
that question and asking it and then hearing that, I mean,
that's your truth. And I think it gives a lot
of other women or people out there the ability to say, gosh,
you know, it's okay. Children will come into my life
in other ways, and I can have a different archetype
(23:45):
and a different story and still find my full meaning
and purpose and develop those mothering nurturing qualities within.
Speaker 3 (23:53):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (24:00):
What else?
Speaker 2 (24:00):
So my entire family lives on the opposite side of
the country is me?
Speaker 3 (24:04):
Okay? Where do they live in New Jersey?
Speaker 1 (24:07):
Okay?
Speaker 2 (24:07):
So three thousand something miles away from me. My originally
moved out here for at work. I don't really have
to be out here anymore other than now that I
have the Seahawks job, and that obviously is very important
to me. But I can move anywhere with what I
do at this point.
Speaker 3 (24:22):
But I love where I live.
Speaker 2 (24:24):
My family is constantly like when are you moving back?
Speaker 1 (24:27):
You have a big family, I do. Oh my gosh.
They just told me they're big and loud. They were like,
they are big and loud, and they have like what
when are you coming? I mean, they guilt trip the
heck out of you, Like when are you coming back?
Oh it was only for this shortage. I mean, they
give you a hard time and you you and are
very similar in what I'm about to say, and they're
showing me. Is you get emotional whiplash meaning Okay, I'm sorry,
(24:50):
I can't come, And then you're back and you're like,
oh gosh, they're gonna be so mad at me. Okush,
I'm gonna let them down. Oh goush. I can't be
everything to everyone. And that stuff right there is one
of the things I want you to start noticing, because
the more you feel that and you say, wait a minute,
I feel guilty, Okay, let me in a halin X.
It's I'm not guilty. I set a boundary. I can't
be everywhere at once and nobody's gonna like or love
(25:10):
me any less. That's the ultimate piece. But okay, moving back,
it doesn't feel like it's coming anytime soon. I feel
like opportunities will come from this Seahawks gig. You will
have the ability to move, but I almost feel like
you move somewhere. This is so weird. But I'm gonna
just tell you Midwestern when it is time to move.
(25:32):
So I don't know if it might be Chicago, it
could be, but it's like you split. The difference is
what they said. And you know what is kind of
funny about that, and your soul is like going ma,
is that you need a little bit of geography with
you and your family, because then you can hop on
a plane, you can go spend time, you can have
them spend time with you. But you're still in a
(25:54):
phase of really having your life your independence. So you
better know you're yourself because once you're in and in
close proximity to your family and you love them and
they love you for all the highs and lows, but
sometimes you lose yourself in your direction. And that was
why you moved. I mean like you were like, I've
got to do this for me to stand on my
(26:15):
two feet, to get my clarity aligned. Does that make sense?
Speaker 3 (26:20):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (26:20):
I never ever thought I would move away, and then
when the opportunity came up, I was like, Okay, whatever,
I'll do it. Yeah that was seven years ago, and
I remember at first being like, I'm so scared of
being alone. I don't know how to do anything without
anyone else. And then that kind of codependency you mentioned
earlier kicked in and I learned how to do things
(26:41):
on my own, and there are times where I'm like, well,
it sucks that my parents just can't come over and
help me with something, but I've also.
Speaker 3 (26:47):
Figured it out on my own.
Speaker 2 (26:49):
Ya, So there's this odd balance of like, it sucks
being so far away, but also it's nice because when
I'm visiting them, we get quality time. I'm staying at
my parents' house thirty five years old, with them all
hours of the day, my nieces, nephews, everyone, like, we
get quality time. So it's so hard, but guilt tripping
and if they're gonna listen to this, I know it.
(27:10):
They do it to me so bad, like so so bad,
and I it wrecks me every day every.
Speaker 1 (27:17):
Day I know well, and they're showing me that. And
with your parents, they just love the heck out of you.
They just want to be with you and see you,
and you miss them too. But you're still flexing your muscles,
finding your voice, your truth, yourself. But you are gonna
move closer and eventually you'll be in close proximity to
your family. But it really feels like maybe within five
(27:37):
ish years.
Speaker 3 (27:38):
I believe.
Speaker 1 (27:38):
So it's like there's a halfway point, which is a
you know, a shorter flight, you can spend more time.
But next year is a year of travel. You're traveling
a lot. Next year it's going and doing and traveling
and being, and you're gonna have reasons where you have
to be on the East Coast, so you're gonna have
business reasons, business opportunities that put you closer to home
to see them more, but also having them come out
(28:02):
to see you and planning it and figuring it out
and getting it on the calendar, I mean, putting that
on your to do list so that way you have
it to look forward to and then you set aside
the quality time that will happen. But right now you're
where you're planned. But I feel like, probably I feel
like twenty twenty four, you are still in the Washington area,
(28:23):
and it may be probably closer to twenty twenty five
or fall of twenty twenty four, you take a new
opportunity that is I mean kind of a big step
up with an opportunity, and it's a broadcasting opportunity, and
it's like live broadcasting, and it really does feel like
it is a result of this opportunity with the Seahawks
(28:45):
and in the sports arena, some way, shape or form.
It's all interrelated. Cool, and it's also on your own.
And it doesn't mean that your podcast, the morning show,
that that podcast. It doesn't mean that it goes away.
It just made me work, you know, and it may
it may shift and change. So don't be afraid of
oh gosh, is this gonna have to end in order
(29:07):
for me to accept this new opportunity. No, things just
morph and they'll be a natural progression. I mean, sure
there might be you know, decisions and hard conversations, but
it's also it's it's gonna ultimately be very aligned. So
know that. Tell me your mom's name. They keep talking
to me about your mom.
Speaker 2 (29:24):
Anna, Marie.
Speaker 1 (29:26):
Her name is, her middle name is Mary.
Speaker 3 (29:27):
And yeah, there's a lot of if there's Marie. If
you hear Marie a lot, it's because we're all Marie.
Speaker 1 (29:31):
Oh my gosh, she talks really fast, your mom. They
just said that, like and I talk really fast, but
they were like, she talks faster than you. And she's
very animated. Is your mom very just very animated and
she talks really fast. She's a gal after my own heart,
and she she has has high energy, I mean very
high energy. Very animated. One of the things that they
(29:52):
are showing me about your mom and about you and
your relationship is she really has always wanted you to
be whatever you wanted to be in this life. I mean,
she's told you that she's supported you, like, I want
you to be happy, but I want you to be
the best that you can be do the things kind of,
I mean, she encourages that, and then at the same time,
(30:13):
she's like, but stay home, but maybe.
Speaker 3 (30:14):
Do it here.
Speaker 1 (30:15):
Yeah, but it be anything you want to be, but
do it right here. And yet at the same time,
she's wise enough. She is so proud of you, and
I know she would tell you this, but she kind
of you know, and she does. But like they're saying,
she is so proud of you and she admires you,
and I know that she will agree with this when
she hears it. But your mom has made sure that
(30:39):
you have the opportunities you have and you have a
really good mom. Like they're just they don't always say that,
and they're just acknowledging it. So shout out to you
Anna Marie for being such an amazing mom. I know,
because I mean it feels so good and you know
what a blessing in this lifetime because not everybody like
I had a really great mom, but your mom really
(31:02):
loves you no matter what. So when you feel guilty
or you can't be two places at once, you know,
you get to say, hey, Mom, I don't want to
feel guilty about this, but I know you're not going
to love me any less since I can't come see you,
you know, just say it out and then y'all get
to laugh, and she just says, I know, but I
still am so upset, you know, And then then y'all
will start laughing, you know what I mean. And then
(31:23):
y'all will just start laughing about it, which will take
the pressure off, and it also will just be easier
so you don't feel guilty, and then you'll have more
time and maximize your time. So that because home and
you know, with all the responsibility stuff we were talking
about this year, and it almost feeling like a burden,
some of it right now is very personal and home
(31:44):
and family related, not just your work stuff. It feels
like I kind of wish I had my parents here,
like I've got all these things going on. I mean,
I feel it all over your field, and girlfriend, you're
not alone in feeling that way. And at thirty five,
it doesn't matter what age we are, it's still like
I just need my parents, you know, I just need
my mom. And you can pick up the phone and
(32:05):
tell her that, you know, tell her that stuff, and
I know you do.
Speaker 3 (32:08):
Oh yeah.
Speaker 1 (32:08):
A huge part of this year and next year and
it's next year is a year of mastery. And when
I say mastery, I don't mean it's perfection or you
master anything, but it's a year of leveling up, which
means you grow. There's a gross burt which when we grow,
we let go of things, and it can be fear,
you know, limiting attitudes, behaviors, that sort of thing. But
(32:33):
your mojo, your fuel, is in really developing a connection
with God, with your higher power. Hey God, you know,
hay soul, I can't figure this out right now, help me,
or finding some spiritual practices that you resonate with because
you love to learn. I mean you you can sit
(32:55):
with a book or figure something out and it's like eureka.
I mean, you're your moments of intuition, they're very clear, cognizant.
And then because you are so piscy and you are
you're very creative and pisc and you know there there's
very much a lot of empathy and clear sentience, so
the emotional portion of it. But I mean you get
aha moments very much in your own solitary investigative journalist
(33:20):
kind of time when you're diving into something, so finding
some spiritual tools and practices whatever that looks like, to
really get still and go within and start connecting some dots.
Speaker 2 (33:33):
You know, my mom's gonna listen to this and be like, see,
I told you, Because I'm probably the least religious person
in my family, but I am more spiritual. I do
need to be better focusing at like exactly what you're saying, yeah,
to kind of find a better purpose. But my mom
is like church every week, I know.
Speaker 1 (33:51):
And there's like candles too, Like does she does your
mom like candles? Yeah, they're showing me the candles, and
it's like and too, I guess your mom's mom that
grandmother is she deceased? Yes, yes, I mean she was
very very religious, very devout, and it was black and white,
(34:11):
black and white, and so your mom is like, yes,
I honor that. But your mom, you know, is a
little bit more flexible and open. So you get to
find your way, but know that your grandmother is rooting
for you to connect with your spirit, connect with God
and in whatever way works for you. Remember we were
talking about your quirkiness and your uniqueness is as long
(34:34):
as you seek God, God will reveal be revealed to you.
And that's that's kind of where the path begins. So
sure you can go to church or have your rosary
beads or your candles, but you you can also get
you know, a deck of oracle cards or some crystals,
or start going to a yoga class. I mean anything
just to quiet your mind and open your heart. Right,
(34:56):
that's all it is is still you know, quiet the
jibber jabber the mind, still the heart. But your grandmother
what was her name, your mom's.
Speaker 3 (35:03):
Mom, Tina or Nicoletta or Nicola Tina.
Speaker 1 (35:06):
She had like three hush, like your mom is animated
and active. But I'm like, your grandmother just came in
and your grandmother, it's like whatever she said went. I
mean she was the woman of the household, is that right? Yeah,
I mean the matriarch for sure, and whatever she said went.
And she was a tough lady and she i mean
(35:26):
pulled herself up by the bootstraps, rolled her sleeves up
and made life happen and work. And I mean she
is was very very empowered. And she said, I mean,
you're very empowered and you it's it's like it's her lineage,
it's her DNA, and she's she is right by your side,
rooting for you. But she says, I want you to
(35:46):
just have fun too. You get you get to have fun,
she said, not that I didn't have fun, but I
made sacrifices. It was the product of the time and
the error that I came out of. She says, you
get to work hard and be diligent and respected. But
she says you got to lighten up and have fun.
She says, this isn't this hard hard work. You don't
(36:09):
have to work that hard. It's not sustainable. She loves
you very much. And she also there's food. There's lots
of food at her house.
Speaker 2 (36:17):
Yes, she would always cook for my sister and I.
But I can't find a charm that she gave me.
I've been going nuts looking for it. So she doesn't
have to tell you right now, but if she can
help me find it.
Speaker 1 (36:28):
Do you think that it's at your parents' house at
your mom's like in your room.
Speaker 3 (36:33):
It could be.
Speaker 2 (36:34):
I had it here with me out in Seattle at
one point. It's a little saint, actually a little of
course it's a saint.
Speaker 1 (36:39):
I mean because I'm like, I've got candles and rosaries
and all the like all of the things, so of
course it's a little saint. I don't know if you
wore at home or you wore it, but it does
not feel like it is there. But it will appear,
she said, it will appear when you're not looking for it,
and it'll be right at the right moment. And whatever
saint it is. Do you know which saint it is?
Speaker 3 (36:59):
I don't.
Speaker 1 (37:00):
I'm like, is it France's or Guadalupe. I'm like, I
don't know.
Speaker 2 (37:04):
I don't even know. I remember she gave it to me.
It's something about like the Saint of money or finances
something like that. Okay, I'm trying to see if I
can find it. But she when she gave it to me,
it was years ago, and right after that I kind
of like got my first big, big paycheck and I.
Speaker 1 (37:19):
Was like, I need to I gotta find this charm
the saint. Guess what, that is a great place for
you to just dig into some spirituality is looking at
some of the Catholics, the saints and what they are
the patron saints over and asking them to come in
for you as guides and saying, hey, Saints so and so, Hey,
(37:40):
Saints so and so, I'm struggling in this area. Will
you watch over me? Will you will you support me?
Do that and then start opening your eyes to synchronicities
and signs and things that show up. Start there. That's
a beautiful place for you to start. And one more
thing that I want to bring up, because they're showing
me very clearly, is money. Speaking of money is one
of those things for you in this time where you
(38:04):
want to be successful, you want to be abundant, you
want to have money in the bank. But also there
is this fear that I'm not going to have enough,
like I'm always going to be working hard, you know,
and not going to have everything that I need. So
it can sometimes feel like feast or famine. And that
is one thing that you are healing is finding utter
security and almost abundance or richness internally, and it will
(38:28):
you have the ability to actually make quite a bit
of money. You do like it's in your energy field. However,
a huge portion of it is finding enrich life experiences
and enjoying them and when you have them, be like, wow,
I'm rich, you know, like when you you know, when
we have good friends or good people and you're like, gosh,
(38:50):
I feel so wealthy. This is the best. The more
you notice that feeling in your body and put that
on your to do list, like how do I spend
more time with people that help me cultivate this, you know,
that is when your ability to attract more opportunities and
you will always have multiple investments, you know, how you
have the podcast the Yeah Seahawks. You usually will have
(39:13):
two or three lines of income streams, business work. You
just operate that way, and you like it doesn't mean
that it'll always be overwhelming, kind of like with what
you've got going on now, but you will always have
multiple income streams and you're not going to be destitute
like you're not. And there's like a deep fear of
I'm not going to have what I need.
Speaker 3 (39:31):
Yes, they're definitely.
Speaker 1 (39:33):
Yes, I don't know, and they just wanted me to
bring that up. Well, I think it was your grandmother
that was like you see why I gave her that,
and I'm like, yeah, I got it. She knew she
was wise. She was very wise. So anyway, is there
anything else that we haven't talked about that you wantn't
know about?
Speaker 2 (39:47):
I'm sure later on today I'm like, oh, why didn't
I ask her this? But I don't really have anything
of me personally. I mean, caring for my grandma's awesome.
I made my mom make a list of everyone in
our family that I could think of or that she
could think of that has passed away, and their full name,
how they died, and their birthday. Because I was so
concerned that you were going to mention someone or a nickname,
(40:08):
but I wasn't not to know.
Speaker 1 (40:09):
Okay, but tell me, well, tell me this your grandmother
that has all three names. Do you remember her birthday?
Speaker 2 (40:15):
Her birthday is April twenty first, nineteen twenty five.
Speaker 1 (40:19):
We have to give a shout out to your mother.
I love that you called your mom and you're like,
I've got to be prepared for this. For all, she
did it so fast, I can I know she's she's
a whipper snapper, your mom. I like, I would like
to beat her, your grandmother, just because she was like no,
I asked my birthday. She was extremely wise. She was tough,
but she was wise, and she says, this is a
(40:41):
time where you're tapping into your wisdom. Did she have something?
Do you know if she had cardio pulmonary like cardio
upper respiratory stuff that because she's because she was like,
just validate that it's me for her by something tantrela.
I was like, all right, we'll show me. And so
I'm like, I feel it in my heart. Did she
what did she have?
Speaker 2 (40:58):
She had congestive heart.
Speaker 1 (41:00):
That's what my dad died of. And she says, she says,
you know what, she's laughing. She said, yeah, my breath
was taken away. I mean, she's totally making a joke
as you are tearing up, which I'm like, okay, of
course she would because she's really tough.
Speaker 3 (41:14):
She said it was my time.
Speaker 1 (41:16):
She said I had lived and I lived hard and large,
and she said it was my time. And I knew
everybody would be okay without me. And it's been challenging
without her because she was a glue that held everybody
together holidays things like that. She says, it's time for
you all to figure that stuff out. She's really straightforward.
She's like, you all need to figure that out because
(41:38):
you're inconsistent and you're you know, like, Okay, we won't
really do this this Thanksgiving or Christmas or whatever it is.
She says, no, you need to pull it together. But
she says, you know, with her congestive heart failure, she said,
it was painful for a little bit because my chest
was so tight. But she says, once I eased into it,
(41:58):
she said, I wasn't afraid to die like she wasn't,
you know, And she said, I went straight to my
lord as your grandfather deceased to her husband, Uh, yes,
because she says that he was there, So did he
die before her?
Speaker 3 (42:10):
He died before her, but they were divorced.
Speaker 1 (42:13):
They were divorced, but interesting, he's the one that he's
the one that was there for her. And do you
maybe your mom remembers this towards the end. I don't
know if she was reminiscing or thinking about old times
or things that had gone on. There was a comfort
in having his spirit there to receive her. It was
a familiarity and so it was almost like it superseded
(42:35):
all the human drama and trauma and messiness and your
grandfather is raising his hand and he's saying, yeah, I was.
I was inconsistent. And when they say inconsistent, it's son
of a it's a lot. And I know, you know,
I mean, he really he let people down. There was
just there were some challenges there, but he said, but
I showed up and picked her up and it was
(42:57):
safe and it was the spirit that she fell in
love with to begin with.
Speaker 3 (43:01):
That's awesome.
Speaker 2 (43:02):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (43:03):
So anyway, okay, so figure out some saints. Okay, Like
that's your homework. Your spiritual homework is figure out some
saints and ask them to come in as your guides
and then look and listen for the science and syncreticities. Okay, Okay,
So when we talk, I'm going to be like, Okay,
what have you been doing. I'm going to ask you
and I normally don't, but I'm like, I'm gonna ask
you questions, like tell me about your homework, tell me
(43:25):
about your spiritual homework.
Speaker 3 (43:27):
I can do that.
Speaker 1 (43:28):
Thank you, Oh my gosh, it's been so amazing connecting
and I really want to thank you for showing up
with your open heart and your big energy, but also
with your curiosity. And curiosity is something that you innately
have and cultivating that and enjoying, you know, figuring things
out in a mysterious like kind of like investigative journalist
(43:52):
or detective sort of way that lights your fire. Yeah,
you know it does. And so investigating yourself, soul searching,
personal development, that stuff is just gonna light you on
fire and you will start feeling like you're soaring and
all of that weight of responsibility will start to lift
(44:13):
and it won't feel like just box checking. It'll feel
like more like holistic living, because that's the phase you're in.
That's the stride.
Speaker 2 (44:22):
I've been like trying to figure out what it is
that I need to do next, And even said earlier
when we first started about sometimes I can't even put
it or anyone can put into their own words how
they feel or anything about themselves. And I've been trying
to figure out how do I do what's.
Speaker 3 (44:36):
Next or what is next?
Speaker 2 (44:37):
And I think that you nailed it with that of like,
do more things with purpose and basically just get my
shit together.
Speaker 1 (44:45):
Well also but have fun, yeah, like and surround yourself
with joyful people, fun people, people that make you laugh
and feel lighthearted. So you take yourself less seriously. And
it's not about you not being serious and successful and significant,
because you are already those things. But it's about you
adding in the element of grace and play and flexibility
(45:07):
and fluidity and fun to just be totally quirky and lighthearted.
Speaker 3 (45:12):
Okay, this next year, I'm gonna do it.
Speaker 1 (45:15):
You got it, You can totally do it well. Thank
you for joining me, Carla Marie. I'm so grateful to
be connected and excited to show up on the podcast.
Speaker 3 (45:26):
Yes, we're going to do it past. We're going to
have you live, Yeah.
Speaker 1 (45:28):
Which will be fun because we'll be able to take listeners,
which listen listener calls, which I absolutely love. So more
on that. Everyone, take care. We are in a season
of pretty high highs and low lows, so navigate that
with grace. Also, wherever you feel overly burdened by responsibility,
take a page from Carlos Soul's playbook so you can
(45:53):
start to not just check things off of your to
do list, but really feel like you're checking things off
of you. Thanks for joining me. I'm Amanda riger Green
and this has been Soul Sessions
Hi, everyone, It's Amanda Rieger Green. Welcome to The Soul's
Sessions podcast. Today we are doing a live reading and
my guest who's agreed to show up and have her
reading on air is Carla Marie. Carla Marie is the
host of Carla Marie and Anthony's show on Twitch and
(00:29):
The Morning Show Podcast, a podcast that gives you everything
you need to start your day in under twenty five minutes.
She's also the in game host for the Seattle Seahawks.
You can follow her on Instagram at the Carla Marie Welcome.
Speaker 2 (00:46):
Hi.
Speaker 3 (00:47):
I can't believe I'm here right now.
Speaker 1 (00:49):
I'm so excited. Have you ever had a psychic reading?
Speaker 3 (00:52):
I've had? Is it called a flame reading.
Speaker 1 (00:55):
Like a twin flame like about love and stuff that.
Speaker 2 (00:58):
My friend did it format it's something where you take
the flame of a candle and use the burn and
you you do something and it was.
Speaker 3 (01:05):
Like super quick, super short. But that's it.
Speaker 2 (01:07):
But I'm so intrigued by this. I've always just been
so nervous. Yeah, so I'm here and I'm ready.
Speaker 1 (01:13):
Well, don't worry. I will say you at ease. And
also the way that I read is I meet Amanda
I step aside, and your soul starts to come through,
which is the utter essence of you. So it innately
feels comfortable. It feels like you're at home in your
own skin. Essentially all the things that you know about
yourself that sometimes you can't even put words to their
(01:34):
impressions and feelings, all the things like that.
Speaker 3 (01:37):
So please tell me about it.
Speaker 1 (01:38):
We have to We have to share something really cool
to begin with. So my producer and I were back
and forth and talking about having you on as a
guest the other morning, and she reached out to you
via text, and y'all were in the middle of your
show and we're apparently talking about me at the same
time she texts, So we were all on the same wavelength.
Speaker 3 (02:00):
It was wild.
Speaker 2 (02:01):
We were live on our show and I was saying
how I was going to possibly do this with you,
and how we wanted to get you on our live
show on Twitch to read for our audience, And it
was in that exact moment that I got that text,
and I was like, well, we have to do this
because the universe said something.
Speaker 1 (02:16):
The universe said so and divine timing and alignment and
then making things happen quickly. That's I'm going to just
start reading because they're giving me information. That's one of
the things that you're very good at. You are good
at executing. You're an executor. You've been very good at
jumping in and playing ball, so to speak. I mean,
you also are very competitive, but you're mostly competitive with yourself.
But you like to roll up your sleeves and you'll
(02:38):
tackle anything that comes down the pipes. The other thing
they're showing me at the same time is you have
this maturity and this high level of responsibility where sometimes
it's hard for you to just be totally loose and free.
And freedom is a big story for you in this
lifetime where you feel that you can really be yourself,
(02:58):
be quirky because you are quirky, by the way, and
you're intelligent, and you're quirky, and you're easily you easily
relate to people. You know this already, but you but
but being true to yourself, but in all of your quirkiness,
all your idiosyncrasies, yet feeling relatable. I mean, that is
that's a huge part of your story. But back to
the responsibility, does that make sense? You were born with
(03:20):
I'm gonna get it done. I'm gonna get it done myself,
and sometimes stubborn. You are stubborn.
Speaker 3 (03:24):
Yeah, I don't.
Speaker 2 (03:25):
I don't like asking for help. And if I do
and it's not done immediately, I'll just do it.
Speaker 3 (03:30):
Yeah, myself.
Speaker 2 (03:31):
It's not my best trait, but it does get things done.
Speaker 1 (03:33):
It does get things done. And interestingly enough, you are
in a phase where this is a year of practicing
some patients and trusting in relationships, and you have some
trust issues. I mean kind of some big ones. And
I mean and it's not that you don't have good
friends and people that you trust, but trust is one
of those things in this lifetime where you are going
to be let down, you are going to be disappointed.
(03:54):
But finding resiliency in that does that resonate a little bit?
Speaker 2 (03:58):
Yeah, I mean it's not trust is that I think
people are out to get me. It's just more of like,
I'll do it on my own. I'll be on my
own and I'll be fine.
Speaker 1 (04:05):
Okay, So extreme self reliance, self sufficiency. So back to
the trust piece of that. It's trusting that somebody is
gonna do something and whether they do it to your
standard or not. Because you have very high standards, is
being able to let people show up and either do
it well or mess up, and find some flexibility in
that versus always taking everything on because at some point,
(04:27):
while yes, it's important to be responsible and independent and
you are very independent, but also feeling like you don't
have the weight of the world on your shoulders. And
this year has kind of felt like that. Even though
you achieve things at a high level and you get
things done well, it also can feel almost like a
burden of responsibility or gosh, I have to get all
(04:48):
this done. Nobody's gonna do it. I'm gonna do it
on my own. I know I can do it well.
So there's an element of you just pushing through, and
it's being able to find some kind of like okay
flow versus feeling like it's box checking energy. And there's
nothing wrong with box checking, but do you get does
that resonate.
Speaker 3 (05:05):
Every day of my life?
Speaker 2 (05:06):
And I've always lived like that, but this year it
truly has gotten so bad. And we're trying to get
into a better routine now and it's slowly starting to happen,
but it's kind of take that what you just explained
has taken over my life and has made it harder
for me to actually do things because of that.
Speaker 1 (05:25):
Okay, so back to trust. Back to trust, it's you know,
getting up and saying, hey, here's what I need you
to do, here's what I need it done. Can you
handle this for me? Are you going to be able
to accomplish it? Do you need anything else for me?
Like it almost like here's what I need, here are
the facts. Can you do this for me? Can you
do it within this timeframe? Is there anything else you
(05:45):
need for me? And then it's almost like let go
and let god kind of energy and if they don't
follow through, follow up, then you respond. Then you use
your resiliency and know that the whole world is not
going to fall apart, that you're not going to to
be doomed, you know, to failure, which you're not. But
you are a perfectionist and you want to succeed. I mean,
(06:07):
success is a huge part of your storyline. And also respect.
Respect is a big thing for you. Is I am respectful?
I want to be respected in my field in what
I do. And also they're talking about your intellect because
you're very intelligent, but sometimes you're like, are people gonna
think I'm smart?
Speaker 2 (06:28):
Enough.
Speaker 1 (06:28):
Are they going to think I'm competent enough. So that's
sometimes why the responsibility piles up, because it's like, I
can do it. I can prove to myself I can
get all this done. And you're out growing that. You've
proved it your experience, your track record already tells the tale.
But it's like, you know, you're in a version of
yourself a handful of years ago where you were really
in the climb, and now it's like, Okay, I've got
(06:51):
to step back a little bit and realign. Does that resonate?
Speaker 2 (06:55):
Yeah? And it came from a lot of there was
a lot of doubt put on me, and I think
it kind of I always get pulled back into it
a bit, and every time I get a new challenge
or a new project that I get to work on,
I'm like, oh, but maybe maybe they're regretting hiring me,
or maybe it shouldn't have been been me. So I'm
gonna work harder.
Speaker 3 (07:14):
To prove that I do deserve this. So yes, And.
Speaker 1 (07:18):
First of all, you do deserve the things you've worked for.
And I mean, and I know you've worked hard and
you like to work hard. Everything in your energy field
says that, but this is also a time of unburdening
yourself and working smarter, not harder. And this is what
they're reflecting back. I heard an interview Gosh years ago
when Michelle Obama wrote her book Becoming, which is a
(07:41):
really brilliant book, by the way, but she was talking
about box checking. And I'm a list maker and a
box checker. I love doing that. I love to scratch
things off my to do list. But there comes a
time when you're just box checking, and it's transactional versus
accomplishing things, feeling fulfilled, feeling like you're just showing up
up and finding a deeper sense of usefulness in it,
(08:03):
versus box checking just to get things done, versus with
a meaning or a why behind it. That's what's shifting
in you innately right now.
Speaker 2 (08:12):
And a lot of times I'll have that list, that
box checking list, and be like, I have all of
these things to do, Like how do I even get
it done?
Speaker 3 (08:19):
How do you?
Speaker 2 (08:20):
Like?
Speaker 3 (08:20):
How do you tackle that?
Speaker 2 (08:22):
So yeah, being more mindful of you, I'm doing what'd
be a little bit better.
Speaker 1 (08:25):
Well, And I tell you what, this is funny because
you have a very quick, kind of snarky wit you
have a sinister sense of humor. By the way it's
all over I'm like you and I would be friends
and we would have the same I'm just gonna say it,
kind of raunchy sense of humor and a playful I mean,
you are. I can see it all over your field.
But what they're showing me is even on your to
(08:47):
do list. Like when you're making your list and it
has all these you know, things that you're stretching for
and reaching for and pushing yourself for whatever it is,
put some stuff on your list that is almost absurd
or silly. You know, today, I need to go to
the grocery store and buy energy drinks and I'm gonna
(09:08):
do that. So well, it's almost like put some things
on your list that stop you in your tracks so
you don't feel like you're taking yourself so seriously, because
that's what's being unbridled from you right now is being
able to freaking enjoy what you do. And it's not
that you don't enjoy it, but it's like, Okay, I
can enjoy it for a little bit, then I gotta
work really hard, enjoy it, work, prove myself and listen,
(09:30):
I am all about I have to prove myself. I
have to show everybody I really know what I'm doing.
So I resonate with that. But they are saying it's
about you. I mean, just meeting the moment and enjoying
the heck out of yourself, because that's what is coming
in the next couple of years, is this sense of empowerment,
but empowerment through a lighter heart, and also being flexible
(09:53):
with yourself, like forgiving of yourself, graceful with yourself instead
of like holding on to the steering wheel with a
tight grip.
Speaker 2 (10:00):
Graceful is not great. That describes me, ever, so I'll
work on that one well.
Speaker 1 (10:05):
And listen if graceful doesn't describe you, and which is
not surprising, because you are you know, you're very formulaic,
which means you know it has those kind of linear,
more masculine vibes, and you are very compassionate. You are
highly sensitive. I mean, you have a lot of truly
creative and feminine and intuitive traits, but right now they're
(10:26):
like way in the background at the bottom of the
totem pole. And when you start accessing and harnessing your creativity,
your joy, your lightheartedness, your ability to go with the
darn flow. It's like you are going to become a
professional surfer. It's like riding the waves and you will
feel like you're in your flow. So that's really important. Okay,
(10:48):
let's talk about career. What do you want to know?
They're talking to me a little bit about career. We're
going to talk about love in a minute, because they
are talking about that too. But what do you want
to know about? Let's start with work stuff first. Anything
you want to know? What do you want to know about?
Let's start with work stuff first. Anything you want to know.
Speaker 2 (11:07):
So, my career has been kind of wild. I had
a kind of a like as a long career in radio.
I did ten years, but I haven't been in radio
in three years. I've been kind of doing everything digitally.
My partner and I we do our own show on
Twitch and everything. I got the thing with the Seahawks,
and I think my biggest question for myself right now
in my life is but what is going to stick?
(11:27):
What is the one thing that is going to be
the most successful, or where do I need to put
my energy towards because it's going to three to four
different things right now.
Speaker 3 (11:37):
As my career as one thing.
Speaker 2 (11:40):
So everything I have is going to the show, the podcast,
the Seahawks, working on our apparel line. But I'm like,
where do I need to take most of the energy
and put it? And is it even any.
Speaker 3 (11:49):
Of this stuff?
Speaker 1 (11:50):
Do you like sports?
Speaker 3 (11:52):
I do enjoy sports.
Speaker 2 (11:53):
It wasn't until I got in with the Seahawks that
I really actually fell in love with.
Speaker 1 (11:57):
Okay, parts all you just said, you just answered your
question because they asked me. They asked me, They said,
ask her she liked sports, and I was like, okay,
and I fell in love with You have a synergy there,
and you are really good live on your feet and
you know this even though you're a prepper and you create,
you know your outline or you get ready. I mean,
(12:17):
you do prep but you are really good in the moment.
And this goes back to that proving yourself experience thing.
When you show up and you are on the fly,
you tap into something higher because you have no choice,
but not do you know what I mean, Because you're
gonna show up on and like jump in. That's who
you've been since you were a little girl. Even if somebody,
(12:38):
if somebody says you can't do it, you're gonna do it.
If somebody says this is too difficult, oh no, not
for me. I'll show you. So there's an adrenaline rush
that you love that can scare the heck out of you,
but it motivates you, and when you do it, you
almost have to solely let go. So something about sports
and live commentear live interactions. They keep saying, you have
(13:04):
some opportunities that will generate pretty rapidly from that, and
next year is a year of decision making, but even
deeper than that discernment, meaning it's both head and heart.
And so right now, listen where your money is is. Yes,
you have lots of irons in the fire and you're
following through on all of them, and you're exhausted. Okay,
(13:25):
we know this, but you're showing up and doing amazingly
and you're supposed to be a little scattered right now,
you know what I mean. Let yourself be a little
scattered and overwhelmed and make sure you find some downtime,
even little pockets of it. But what they're saying is
really start listening to your gut instincts like, oh gosh,
(13:46):
I don't feel like doing this today. When you get
up in the morning and you're looking at that list
and you're like, oh, I've got to get these show
notes ready, h and listen, I'm not throwing shade on
any of that stuff. Now. This is about you in
your I've at time saying Okay, I just had a
gut visceral reaction that was I mean, notice that, and
(14:07):
and and you don't have to change anything in the moment,
just say, okay, what is it about it that exhausts me.
I'm gonna do it because I follow through and I'm accountable,
But what is it that is exhausted in me? Is
it the administrative piece of things? You're outgrowing some admin
in some things. That's also what needs to be delegated
off your place, which relates to trust, finding people you
(14:29):
trust to do administrative things one hundred percent. That is
your level of play over the course of the next
five or six months is finding someone administratively that you
can delegate to, that you can allow to take things
off your plate, so it creates time for your talents,
so you can start shooting up that creativity that spark
that fire versus all of the linear thinking that that's
(14:52):
kind of imposing on you. Makes sense. Yes, So the
discernment is like noticing you're like writing it down, noticing
the to do list, and notice when you go, ugh,
you know or I can't. Oh gosh, I don't feel
like that. Okay, let me just get it done. When
you do that, just say okay. And then also just
take a minute, because you move at a pretty fast pace,
(15:14):
take a minute to just breathe, to literally just process
whatever the like you identify as the emotional component of it.
So if it's overwhelmed, annoyance, you know, oh, frustration, that
kind of thing, just inhale and exhale that so you
hold a little space for it, and that'll create a
greater pathway between those eighteen inches between your head and
(15:37):
your heart.
Speaker 3 (15:38):
You said next year is the year of decision making.
Speaker 2 (15:39):
Yeah, and that, Yeah, that gave me that reaction of like, no, no, no,
I don't want to have to do it.
Speaker 3 (15:44):
I hate having to make decisions like.
Speaker 1 (15:46):
That because you don't want to let anybody down. Yeah,
that's what it is, and it's I mean, hello, you
are a piscey, so you all are deep feelers, but
you also take on all the energy of the collective.
But this is about not letting yourself down and also
knowing you're not a bridge burner. You know that's not
really your jam, and you're gonna give notice and you're
gonna whatever it is. And I'm not, you know, like
(16:08):
laying anything out perfectly right now. But when things start
to bubble up and you get all the fear around
communicating your truth, that's when. And this is probably your
rocket ship into another dimension of living, thinking and being
is trusting God, trusting your higher power and saying, hey, God,
hey soul, I'm nervous, I'm worried about having these tough
(16:31):
conversations and making these decisions. Help me. I can't do
it on my own. And that right there, over and
over again, because you are so self reliant. You know,
you know this like you, you and you. It's felt
good for a long time. It gave you adrenaline and
it worked and it also developed. It's part of a
coping mechanism, it's part of innately who you are. But
(16:51):
it's not your story today. So when you say, hey,
I am at my wits end, God, can you sort
this stuff out? Because humanly I just can't. I can't.
You can kind of energy, let go, Let God however
you want to think of it. But the more you
do that and say, I don't I don't know how
to figure this out right now, but I believe that
there's a way forward that's clear, and that it's gonna
feel freeing and true, freeing and true.
Speaker 3 (17:15):
I love that.
Speaker 1 (17:15):
Okay, let's talk about love. Are you single?
Speaker 3 (17:21):
I am not, you're not.
Speaker 1 (17:22):
But are you married?
Speaker 3 (17:23):
Nope?
Speaker 1 (17:24):
I didn't think so. I was like, you're not married,
but but you're so individualistic like whomever you are with
and you'll have to tell me your partner's name in
a minute. But whomever you are with, both of you
have to have your lives. I mean, like it is
so do you know what I mean? You do not
like clingy codependent?
Speaker 2 (17:40):
No?
Speaker 1 (17:40):
I mean it is like you have your interdependence, which
is a healthy thing, but then sometimes it can also
backfire a little bit. But like you have to have
your space. So it's like they keep showing me you
in this bubble and we'll let's talk about it in
a minute. What's your partner's name?
Speaker 2 (17:54):
So remember when you said I was the host of
the Carla, Marie and Anthony Show.
Speaker 3 (17:58):
Is anything? Okay?
Speaker 1 (17:59):
I haven't even listened the show. Everybody.
Speaker 3 (18:01):
Yeah, that's great.
Speaker 1 (18:01):
I'm had and I didn't before, like we connected, I
haven't listened before because I like to I don't like
to know these things.
Speaker 2 (18:08):
So okay, so Anthony, we need our own space because
we are also together working all the time.
Speaker 1 (18:14):
Okay, all right, Okay. One of the things they're showing
me is you two do work together, but you do
need your space and you do need your energy. And
one of the things about this Seahawks deal that's exciting
for you is you feel like you get to go
out and spread your wings, challenge yourself play and it
feels like it's yours and it's not. You know, it's
(18:35):
I mean, you too have a very healthy relationship. You
just are also working with finding the balance between work
and life, work and personal life and those boundaries and
where that is. The other thing is to he really
appreciates your input. He's really good at listening to your input.
They just said, does that resonate?
Speaker 2 (18:55):
Yes, that is we were best friends before we started
dating or even working together any of it, And yeah,
that's always who he's been supportive and.
Speaker 1 (19:04):
Just yeah, yeah, I love it, And I mean, they're
showing me that because not all partners are good listeners.
And he does, and he hears you, and he figure
out figures out a lot of times how to respond
and and it's like he really is contemplative in that way.
And you also there this are making me smile about this,
Like at home and you know, your intimate and your
(19:24):
private time with him, you can unleash you're crazy and
he lets you unleash it, like like I mean, like
I can't handle it, like when you explode, because when
you're pushed to a brink, you blow and it's and
you are compassionate and loving and passionate, but when you
have pushed it down and been working and you're exhausted,
(19:47):
it blows. And he knows to be like, Okay, you know,
I'll see you later or I'll He's pretty he's learned
to be able to do that and give you your space.
Speaker 2 (19:57):
Yeah, he definitely does that, whether it is work related
or personal, family, whatever it is.
Speaker 3 (20:02):
It's kind of like a do you need time or
what do you need me to do? Or how are
we going to fix this?
Speaker 2 (20:06):
Yes, he's not very reactive, which sometimes is frustrating, but yeah.
Speaker 1 (20:10):
Okay, anything you want to know.
Speaker 2 (20:12):
Relationship wise well, since unfortunately he's und here to defend himself.
But I think one of the things I have questioned
my whole life is if I want to have kids
or not. And I'm now thirty five years old, still
unsure if I want to have kids. I'm not against it,
I just don't know if I want or I don't
(20:32):
know if it's going to happen.
Speaker 1 (20:33):
I'm forty two and I'm the same way. If I
had a child, I know it'd be a great mom
and I would jump in and all the things. If
I don't, I'm kind of like, Okay, that may be
the story too. You're very similar that way. And one
of the things they're showing me is you came into
this lifetime to learn to be the child to mother yourself,
(20:54):
because you came in very adult like and very responsible.
So you're learning to be more childlike as an adult.
And I don't mean immature, I mean joyful, lighthearted, playful,
and one of the things, by the way, and this
doesn't answer that, but it answers that one of the
best things you can do for your soul, for your
personal enrichment and happiness is surround yourself by friendships and
(21:16):
relationships that make you lighthearted and laugh. People that are funny, joyful,
just not don't have a care in the world, but
seem to just show up and not take themselves too seriously.
Those people are the greatest role models for you on
a personal and a spiritual level. So one of the
(21:38):
things they're showing me is until you know how to
almost mother yourself and allow yourself to be the playful, creative,
wondrous child, you will not know whether or not you
truly want to be a mother or not. And can
you be Yes, you can, But it's almost like your
career and your work is your child. The other thing
(22:00):
I mean, like, yeah, you loved it an art time. Yeah,
that's what they just said. So and I had I
had a psychic tell me years ago when this came up.
She said, well, Amanda, I said, you know, whatever will
be will be. And she said, but Amanda, you you
know you do have this point of attraction and ability
to say, Okay, if I want a child, and maybe
I can't do it biologically, I can adopt. But that
(22:22):
has never aligned. It just you know, there's a history
behind that, but it hasn't aligned yet. But I'm also
getting very comfortable with the fact that I may not
have biological children of my own, but I have children
in my life that I get to show up and
nurture and be a guide to. You will have that, yeah,
And you're great at it, and you're great with kids,
(22:43):
and kids love you and you're fun, like you're fun
when you're with kids. So that's what I'm saying, is
like more play, more childlike wonder and bringing that out
in yourself. But you do have the choice to be
a mother or not. But I almost don't think that
you will have children. I'm just gonna tell you what
they're telling me. I mean, and I feel like, at
the core of your soul, it's like I think I
would be good, you know, really having this life of
(23:06):
me being at the center of things. And I don't
mean that superficially, saying that with so much love, because
that's what your soul is like, just say it. She
wants she wants to be the child and the adult
and everything in between. That's your truth. Yeah, that's your truth.
Speaker 3 (23:22):
I don't disagree with that.
Speaker 1 (23:25):
Yeah, well that's a big question to ask, and you know,
and putting that out there vulnerably, I mean, just having
that question and asking it and then hearing that, I mean,
that's your truth. And I think it gives a lot
of other women or people out there the ability to say, gosh,
you know, it's okay. Children will come into my life
in other ways, and I can have a different archetype
(23:45):
and a different story and still find my full meaning
and purpose and develop those mothering nurturing qualities within.
Speaker 3 (23:53):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (24:00):
What else?
Speaker 2 (24:00):
So my entire family lives on the opposite side of
the country is me?
Speaker 3 (24:04):
Okay? Where do they live in New Jersey?
Speaker 1 (24:07):
Okay?
Speaker 2 (24:07):
So three thousand something miles away from me. My originally
moved out here for at work. I don't really have
to be out here anymore other than now that I
have the Seahawks job, and that obviously is very important
to me. But I can move anywhere with what I
do at this point.
Speaker 3 (24:22):
But I love where I live.
Speaker 2 (24:24):
My family is constantly like when are you moving back?
Speaker 1 (24:27):
You have a big family, I do. Oh my gosh.
They just told me they're big and loud. They were like,
they are big and loud, and they have like what
when are you coming? I mean, they guilt trip the
heck out of you, Like when are you coming back?
Oh it was only for this shortage. I mean, they
give you a hard time and you you and are
very similar in what I'm about to say, and they're
showing me. Is you get emotional whiplash meaning Okay, I'm sorry,
(24:50):
I can't come, And then you're back and you're like,
oh gosh, they're gonna be so mad at me. Okush,
I'm gonna let them down. Oh goush. I can't be
everything to everyone. And that stuff right there is one
of the things I want you to start noticing, because
the more you feel that and you say, wait a minute,
I feel guilty, Okay, let me in a halin X.
It's I'm not guilty. I set a boundary. I can't
be everywhere at once and nobody's gonna like or love
(25:10):
me any less. That's the ultimate piece. But okay, moving back,
it doesn't feel like it's coming anytime soon. I feel
like opportunities will come from this Seahawks gig. You will
have the ability to move, but I almost feel like
you move somewhere. This is so weird. But I'm gonna
just tell you Midwestern when it is time to move.
(25:32):
So I don't know if it might be Chicago, it
could be, but it's like you split. The difference is
what they said. And you know what is kind of
funny about that, and your soul is like going ma,
is that you need a little bit of geography with
you and your family, because then you can hop on
a plane, you can go spend time, you can have
them spend time with you. But you're still in a
(25:54):
phase of really having your life your independence. So you
better know you're yourself because once you're in and in
close proximity to your family and you love them and
they love you for all the highs and lows, but
sometimes you lose yourself in your direction. And that was
why you moved. I mean like you were like, I've
got to do this for me to stand on my
(26:15):
two feet, to get my clarity aligned. Does that make sense?
Speaker 3 (26:20):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (26:20):
I never ever thought I would move away, and then
when the opportunity came up, I was like, Okay, whatever,
I'll do it. Yeah that was seven years ago, and
I remember at first being like, I'm so scared of
being alone. I don't know how to do anything without
anyone else. And then that kind of codependency you mentioned
earlier kicked in and I learned how to do things
(26:41):
on my own, and there are times where I'm like, well,
it sucks that my parents just can't come over and
help me with something, but I've also.
Speaker 3 (26:47):
Figured it out on my own.
Speaker 2 (26:49):
Ya, So there's this odd balance of like, it sucks
being so far away, but also it's nice because when
I'm visiting them, we get quality time. I'm staying at
my parents' house thirty five years old, with them all
hours of the day, my nieces, nephews, everyone, like, we
get quality time. So it's so hard, but guilt tripping
and if they're gonna listen to this, I know it.
(27:10):
They do it to me so bad, like so so bad,
and I it wrecks me every day every.
Speaker 1 (27:17):
Day I know well, and they're showing me that. And
with your parents, they just love the heck out of you.
They just want to be with you and see you,
and you miss them too. But you're still flexing your muscles,
finding your voice, your truth, yourself. But you are gonna
move closer and eventually you'll be in close proximity to
your family. But it really feels like maybe within five
(27:37):
ish years.
Speaker 3 (27:38):
I believe.
Speaker 1 (27:38):
So it's like there's a halfway point, which is a
you know, a shorter flight, you can spend more time.
But next year is a year of travel. You're traveling
a lot. Next year it's going and doing and traveling
and being, and you're gonna have reasons where you have
to be on the East Coast, so you're gonna have
business reasons, business opportunities that put you closer to home
to see them more, but also having them come out
(28:02):
to see you and planning it and figuring it out
and getting it on the calendar, I mean, putting that
on your to do list so that way you have
it to look forward to and then you set aside
the quality time that will happen. But right now you're
where you're planned. But I feel like, probably I feel
like twenty twenty four, you are still in the Washington area,
(28:23):
and it may be probably closer to twenty twenty five
or fall of twenty twenty four, you take a new
opportunity that is I mean kind of a big step
up with an opportunity, and it's a broadcasting opportunity, and
it's like live broadcasting, and it really does feel like
it is a result of this opportunity with the Seahawks
(28:45):
and in the sports arena, some way, shape or form.
It's all interrelated. Cool, and it's also on your own.
And it doesn't mean that your podcast, the morning show,
that that podcast. It doesn't mean that it goes away.
It just made me work, you know, and it may
it may shift and change. So don't be afraid of
oh gosh, is this gonna have to end in order
(29:07):
for me to accept this new opportunity. No, things just
morph and they'll be a natural progression. I mean, sure
there might be you know, decisions and hard conversations, but
it's also it's it's gonna ultimately be very aligned. So
know that. Tell me your mom's name. They keep talking
to me about your mom.
Speaker 2 (29:24):
Anna, Marie.
Speaker 1 (29:26):
Her name is, her middle name is Mary.
Speaker 3 (29:27):
And yeah, there's a lot of if there's Marie. If
you hear Marie a lot, it's because we're all Marie.
Speaker 1 (29:31):
Oh my gosh, she talks really fast, your mom. They
just said that, like and I talk really fast, but
they were like, she talks faster than you. And she's
very animated. Is your mom very just very animated and
she talks really fast. She's a gal after my own heart,
and she she has has high energy, I mean very
high energy. Very animated. One of the things that they
(29:52):
are showing me about your mom and about you and
your relationship is she really has always wanted you to
be whatever you wanted to be in this life. I mean,
she's told you that she's supported you, like, I want
you to be happy, but I want you to be
the best that you can be do the things kind of,
I mean, she encourages that, and then at the same time,
(30:13):
she's like, but stay home, but maybe.
Speaker 3 (30:14):
Do it here.
Speaker 1 (30:15):
Yeah, but it be anything you want to be, but
do it right here. And yet at the same time,
she's wise enough. She is so proud of you, and
I know she would tell you this, but she kind
of you know, and she does. But like they're saying,
she is so proud of you and she admires you,
and I know that she will agree with this when
she hears it. But your mom has made sure that
(30:39):
you have the opportunities you have and you have a
really good mom. Like they're just they don't always say that,
and they're just acknowledging it. So shout out to you
Anna Marie for being such an amazing mom. I know,
because I mean it feels so good and you know
what a blessing in this lifetime because not everybody like
I had a really great mom, but your mom really
(31:02):
loves you no matter what. So when you feel guilty
or you can't be two places at once, you know,
you get to say, hey, Mom, I don't want to
feel guilty about this, but I know you're not going
to love me any less since I can't come see you,
you know, just say it out and then y'all get
to laugh, and she just says, I know, but I
still am so upset, you know, And then then y'all
will start laughing, you know what I mean. And then
(31:23):
y'all will just start laughing about it, which will take
the pressure off, and it also will just be easier
so you don't feel guilty, and then you'll have more
time and maximize your time. So that because home and
you know, with all the responsibility stuff we were talking
about this year, and it almost feeling like a burden,
some of it right now is very personal and home
(31:44):
and family related, not just your work stuff. It feels
like I kind of wish I had my parents here,
like I've got all these things going on. I mean,
I feel it all over your field, and girlfriend, you're
not alone in feeling that way. And at thirty five,
it doesn't matter what age we are, it's still like
I just need my parents, you know, I just need
my mom. And you can pick up the phone and
(32:05):
tell her that, you know, tell her that stuff, and
I know you do.
Speaker 3 (32:08):
Oh yeah.
Speaker 1 (32:08):
A huge part of this year and next year and
it's next year is a year of mastery. And when
I say mastery, I don't mean it's perfection or you
master anything, but it's a year of leveling up, which
means you grow. There's a gross burt which when we grow,
we let go of things, and it can be fear,
you know, limiting attitudes, behaviors, that sort of thing. But
(32:33):
your mojo, your fuel, is in really developing a connection
with God, with your higher power. Hey God, you know,
hay soul, I can't figure this out right now, help me,
or finding some spiritual practices that you resonate with because
you love to learn. I mean you you can sit
(32:55):
with a book or figure something out and it's like eureka.
I mean, you're your moments of intuition, they're very clear, cognizant.
And then because you are so piscy and you are
you're very creative and pisc and you know there there's
very much a lot of empathy and clear sentience, so
the emotional portion of it. But I mean you get
aha moments very much in your own solitary investigative journalist
(33:20):
kind of time when you're diving into something, so finding
some spiritual tools and practices whatever that looks like, to
really get still and go within and start connecting some dots.
Speaker 2 (33:33):
You know, my mom's gonna listen to this and be like, see,
I told you, Because I'm probably the least religious person
in my family, but I am more spiritual. I do
need to be better focusing at like exactly what you're saying, yeah,
to kind of find a better purpose. But my mom
is like church every week, I know.
Speaker 1 (33:51):
And there's like candles too, Like does she does your
mom like candles? Yeah, they're showing me the candles, and
it's like and too, I guess your mom's mom that
grandmother is she deceased? Yes, yes, I mean she was
very very religious, very devout, and it was black and white,
(34:11):
black and white, and so your mom is like, yes,
I honor that. But your mom, you know, is a
little bit more flexible and open. So you get to
find your way, but know that your grandmother is rooting
for you to connect with your spirit, connect with God
and in whatever way works for you. Remember we were
talking about your quirkiness and your uniqueness is as long
(34:34):
as you seek God, God will reveal be revealed to you.
And that's that's kind of where the path begins. So
sure you can go to church or have your rosary
beads or your candles, but you you can also get
you know, a deck of oracle cards or some crystals,
or start going to a yoga class. I mean anything
just to quiet your mind and open your heart. Right,
(34:56):
that's all it is is still you know, quiet the
jibber jabber the mind, still the heart. But your grandmother
what was her name, your mom's.
Speaker 3 (35:03):
Mom, Tina or Nicoletta or Nicola Tina.
Speaker 1 (35:06):
She had like three hush, like your mom is animated
and active. But I'm like, your grandmother just came in
and your grandmother, it's like whatever she said went. I
mean she was the woman of the household, is that right? Yeah,
I mean the matriarch for sure, and whatever she said went.
And she was a tough lady and she i mean
(35:26):
pulled herself up by the bootstraps, rolled her sleeves up
and made life happen and work. And I mean she
is was very very empowered. And she said, I mean,
you're very empowered and you it's it's like it's her lineage,
it's her DNA, and she's she is right by your side,
rooting for you. But she says, I want you to
(35:46):
just have fun too. You get you get to have fun,
she said, not that I didn't have fun, but I
made sacrifices. It was the product of the time and
the error that I came out of. She says, you
get to work hard and be diligent and respected. But
she says you got to lighten up and have fun.
She says, this isn't this hard hard work. You don't
(36:09):
have to work that hard. It's not sustainable. She loves
you very much. And she also there's food. There's lots
of food at her house.
Speaker 2 (36:17):
Yes, she would always cook for my sister and I.
But I can't find a charm that she gave me.
I've been going nuts looking for it. So she doesn't
have to tell you right now, but if she can
help me find it.
Speaker 1 (36:28):
Do you think that it's at your parents' house at
your mom's like in your room.
Speaker 3 (36:33):
It could be.
Speaker 2 (36:34):
I had it here with me out in Seattle at
one point. It's a little saint, actually a little of
course it's a saint.
Speaker 1 (36:39):
I mean because I'm like, I've got candles and rosaries
and all the like all of the things, so of
course it's a little saint. I don't know if you
wore at home or you wore it, but it does
not feel like it is there. But it will appear,
she said, it will appear when you're not looking for it,
and it'll be right at the right moment. And whatever
saint it is. Do you know which saint it is?
Speaker 3 (36:59):
I don't.
Speaker 1 (37:00):
I'm like, is it France's or Guadalupe. I'm like, I
don't know.
Speaker 2 (37:04):
I don't even know. I remember she gave it to me.
It's something about like the Saint of money or finances
something like that. Okay, I'm trying to see if I
can find it. But she when she gave it to me,
it was years ago, and right after that I kind
of like got my first big, big paycheck and I.
Speaker 1 (37:19):
Was like, I need to I gotta find this charm
the saint. Guess what, that is a great place for
you to just dig into some spirituality is looking at
some of the Catholics, the saints and what they are
the patron saints over and asking them to come in
for you as guides and saying, hey, Saints so and so, Hey,
(37:40):
Saints so and so, I'm struggling in this area. Will
you watch over me? Will you will you support me?
Do that and then start opening your eyes to synchronicities
and signs and things that show up. Start there. That's
a beautiful place for you to start. And one more
thing that I want to bring up, because they're showing
me very clearly, is money. Speaking of money is one
of those things for you in this time where you
(38:04):
want to be successful, you want to be abundant, you
want to have money in the bank. But also there
is this fear that I'm not going to have enough,
like I'm always going to be working hard, you know,
and not going to have everything that I need. So
it can sometimes feel like feast or famine. And that
is one thing that you are healing is finding utter
security and almost abundance or richness internally, and it will
(38:28):
you have the ability to actually make quite a bit
of money. You do like it's in your energy field. However,
a huge portion of it is finding enrich life experiences
and enjoying them and when you have them, be like, wow,
I'm rich, you know, like when you you know, when
we have good friends or good people and you're like, gosh,
(38:50):
I feel so wealthy. This is the best. The more
you notice that feeling in your body and put that
on your to do list, like how do I spend
more time with people that help me cultivate this, you know,
that is when your ability to attract more opportunities and
you will always have multiple investments, you know, how you
have the podcast the Yeah Seahawks. You usually will have
(39:13):
two or three lines of income streams, business work. You
just operate that way, and you like it doesn't mean
that it'll always be overwhelming, kind of like with what
you've got going on now, but you will always have
multiple income streams and you're not going to be destitute
like you're not. And there's like a deep fear of
I'm not going to have what I need.
Speaker 3 (39:31):
Yes, they're definitely.
Speaker 1 (39:33):
Yes, I don't know, and they just wanted me to
bring that up. Well, I think it was your grandmother
that was like you see why I gave her that,
and I'm like, yeah, I got it. She knew she
was wise. She was very wise. So anyway, is there
anything else that we haven't talked about that you wantn't
know about?
Speaker 2 (39:47):
I'm sure later on today I'm like, oh, why didn't
I ask her this? But I don't really have anything
of me personally. I mean, caring for my grandma's awesome.
I made my mom make a list of everyone in
our family that I could think of or that she
could think of that has passed away, and their full name,
how they died, and their birthday. Because I was so
concerned that you were going to mention someone or a nickname,
(40:08):
but I wasn't not to know.
Speaker 1 (40:09):
Okay, but tell me, well, tell me this your grandmother
that has all three names. Do you remember her birthday?
Speaker 2 (40:15):
Her birthday is April twenty first, nineteen twenty five.
Speaker 1 (40:19):
We have to give a shout out to your mother.
I love that you called your mom and you're like,
I've got to be prepared for this. For all, she
did it so fast, I can I know she's she's
a whipper snapper, your mom. I like, I would like
to beat her, your grandmother, just because she was like no,
I asked my birthday. She was extremely wise. She was tough,
but she was wise, and she says, this is a
(40:41):
time where you're tapping into your wisdom. Did she have something?
Do you know if she had cardio pulmonary like cardio
upper respiratory stuff that because she's because she was like,
just validate that it's me for her by something tantrela.
I was like, all right, we'll show me. And so
I'm like, I feel it in my heart. Did she
what did she have?
Speaker 2 (40:58):
She had congestive heart.
Speaker 1 (41:00):
That's what my dad died of. And she says, she says,
you know what, she's laughing. She said, yeah, my breath
was taken away. I mean, she's totally making a joke
as you are tearing up, which I'm like, okay, of
course she would because she's really tough.
Speaker 3 (41:14):
She said it was my time.
Speaker 1 (41:16):
She said I had lived and I lived hard and large,
and she said it was my time. And I knew
everybody would be okay without me. And it's been challenging
without her because she was a glue that held everybody
together holidays things like that. She says, it's time for
you all to figure that stuff out. She's really straightforward.
She's like, you all need to figure that out because
(41:38):
you're inconsistent and you're you know, like, Okay, we won't
really do this this Thanksgiving or Christmas or whatever it is.
She says, no, you need to pull it together. But
she says, you know, with her congestive heart failure, she said,
it was painful for a little bit because my chest
was so tight. But she says, once I eased into it,
(41:58):
she said, I wasn't afraid to die like she wasn't,
you know, And she said, I went straight to my
lord as your grandfather deceased to her husband, Uh, yes,
because she says that he was there, So did he
die before her?
Speaker 3 (42:10):
He died before her, but they were divorced.
Speaker 1 (42:13):
They were divorced, but interesting, he's the one that he's
the one that was there for her. And do you
maybe your mom remembers this towards the end. I don't
know if she was reminiscing or thinking about old times
or things that had gone on. There was a comfort
in having his spirit there to receive her. It was
a familiarity and so it was almost like it superseded
(42:35):
all the human drama and trauma and messiness and your
grandfather is raising his hand and he's saying, yeah, I was.
I was inconsistent. And when they say inconsistent, it's son
of a it's a lot. And I know, you know,
I mean, he really he let people down. There was
just there were some challenges there, but he said, but
I showed up and picked her up and it was
(42:57):
safe and it was the spirit that she fell in
love with to begin with.
Speaker 3 (43:01):
That's awesome.
Speaker 2 (43:02):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (43:03):
So anyway, okay, so figure out some saints. Okay, Like
that's your homework. Your spiritual homework is figure out some
saints and ask them to come in as your guides
and then look and listen for the science and syncreticities. Okay, Okay,
So when we talk, I'm going to be like, Okay,
what have you been doing. I'm going to ask you
and I normally don't, but I'm like, I'm gonna ask
you questions, like tell me about your homework, tell me
(43:25):
about your spiritual homework.
Speaker 3 (43:27):
I can do that.
Speaker 1 (43:28):
Thank you, Oh my gosh, it's been so amazing connecting
and I really want to thank you for showing up
with your open heart and your big energy, but also
with your curiosity. And curiosity is something that you innately
have and cultivating that and enjoying, you know, figuring things
out in a mysterious like kind of like investigative journalist
(43:52):
or detective sort of way that lights your fire. Yeah,
you know it does. And so investigating yourself, soul searching,
personal development, that stuff is just gonna light you on
fire and you will start feeling like you're soaring and
all of that weight of responsibility will start to lift
(44:13):
and it won't feel like just box checking. It'll feel
like more like holistic living, because that's the phase you're in.
That's the stride.
Speaker 2 (44:22):
I've been like trying to figure out what it is
that I need to do next, And even said earlier
when we first started about sometimes I can't even put
it or anyone can put into their own words how
they feel or anything about themselves. And I've been trying
to figure out how do I do what's.
Speaker 3 (44:36):
Next or what is next?
Speaker 2 (44:37):
And I think that you nailed it with that of like,
do more things with purpose and basically just get my
shit together.
Speaker 1 (44:45):
Well also but have fun, yeah, like and surround yourself
with joyful people, fun people, people that make you laugh
and feel lighthearted. So you take yourself less seriously. And
it's not about you not being serious and successful and significant,
because you are already those things. But it's about you
adding in the element of grace and play and flexibility
(45:07):
and fluidity and fun to just be totally quirky and lighthearted.
Speaker 3 (45:12):
Okay, this next year, I'm gonna do it.
Speaker 1 (45:15):
You got it, You can totally do it well. Thank
you for joining me, Carla Marie. I'm so grateful to
be connected and excited to show up on the podcast.
Speaker 3 (45:26):
Yes, we're going to do it past. We're going to
have you live, Yeah.
Speaker 1 (45:28):
Which will be fun because we'll be able to take listeners,
which listen listener calls, which I absolutely love. So more
on that. Everyone, take care. We are in a season
of pretty high highs and low lows, so navigate that
with grace. Also, wherever you feel overly burdened by responsibility,
take a page from Carlos Soul's playbook so you can
(45:53):
start to not just check things off of your to
do list, but really feel like you're checking things off
of you. Thanks for joining me. I'm Amanda riger Green
and this has been Soul Sessions
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