"Green Card Marriages" w/ Maeve Higgins RE-RELEASE

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Well, I'll say it. I'm getting emotional because this is
the last time I will be begging you to buy
tickets to my amazing summer tour. That's right, This Thursday
is the final date of my summer tour as George Savers.
After this I will completely redefine myself and reinvent myself.
But for now, you can see me one more time

(00:21):
on the road in Boston, Massachusetts, by which I mean Somerville,
Massachusetts at the Rockwell Theater. I can't wait. My dear
friend Kylie Alexander's opening. She's so funny, and I think
it's almost sold out. I gotta say the last five
shows have sold out. And I'm not just saying that
to brag. I'm saying it because you're gonna want to
buy your ticket, and you have approximately three days left,

(00:41):
by which I have meet of course me, two days left,
so please buy your tickets. I can't wait to see everyone.
It's gonna be such an amazing night, gonna be emotional
from all the touring that I've done, and it's all
gonna come out on stage. It's gonna be a once
in a lifetime, once in a lifetime opportunity to see
a master at work. Yeah, I'm tired. I'm gonna say,

(01:05):
I am feeling kookie and I'm still talking apparently. But
guess what. Enjoy this episode, this re release if you will,
and guess what. We're going to be back very soon
for our next season of Stradio Lab. And in the meantime,
you can listen to all the episodes we did record
over the summer at patreon dot com slash Stradio Lab. Well,

(01:26):
another announcement in the books. Enjoy the show.

Speaker 2 (01:48):
Podcast starts now. Wow, welcome to Stradio Lab. I'm speechless,
I'm speechless, I'm in shock.

Speaker 1 (01:55):
We are being followed around by reality television cameras, to
say the least.

Speaker 2 (02:00):
Finally, we are being followed at all times. There's no
private space.

Speaker 1 (02:05):
And by the way, you've heard of the vander Pumberwules drama.

Speaker 2 (02:07):
We're part of it. Yeah, we have a big hand
in an actually.

Speaker 1 (02:09):
Big hand in it. We work too to the whole thing. Yeah,
and guess what, it's fucking working because people are talking about.

Speaker 2 (02:15):
It and the numbers are flying through the roof and
it's all because of us. And yeah, you can't see
us on camera, but we're in those credits and you
never bothered to look sweetheart.

Speaker 1 (02:23):
So to be as candid and clear as possible. What's
happening is we are in studio and we recently made
the decision to i'll say it, pivot to video.

Speaker 2 (02:36):
Yeah. Yeah, which is a loaded term, which is crazy.

Speaker 1 (02:40):
In the past of the pivot video has been seen
as a cheap way to get clicks, but in our case,
it's a way to expand our reach.

Speaker 2 (02:47):
Well, our art is about our voices, but it's also
about our images.

Speaker 1 (02:51):
That's true. We have we've talked about this before. What
we were told by a consultant that our faces are
too symmetrical for the camera. Yeah, but they decided, they
were like, you know what, let's risk it.

Speaker 2 (03:02):
Yeah. I mean this is sort of like you know,
Michael Jordan was cut from the high school basketball team,
you know, And so we were told over and over like, no,
people will cry instantly upon seeing you because it's all
just fits so right, and it compliments each other in
such a beautiful way, and you know.

Speaker 1 (03:19):
People think it's cgi, people say it's not real.

Speaker 2 (03:21):
And we kept saying like, oh, let's just let us,
you know, show ourselves.

Speaker 1 (03:25):
And they said no, that's why we ended up in podcasting.
Originally were film actors. Yeah, end stage and they end
stage of course, but they had to always go in
and with CGI replace our faces with Sebastian Stan.

Speaker 2 (03:39):
Because he was a little more approachable. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (03:40):
I they replaced me with Sebastian Stan and you with
Jake Jill and so all those movies that you see
with Jake jol andhlanme Sebastian Stan, like we're the ones
doing the heavy lifting.

Speaker 2 (03:50):
Yeah. But nevertheless, she persisted and we are now on
camera and.

Speaker 1 (03:55):
It's makes sooner YouTube, and I have to say, it
feels in here's the thing we were told, and we
were like excited to you know, like I said, broad
in our reach, reach a new audience is via the
via the medium a video, via the platform of YouTube,
a platform that in my knowledge has never done anything bad.

Speaker 2 (04:15):
No good platform, good platform.

Speaker 1 (04:17):
I've heard the algorithm works really well, and then it
just recommends things that are more and more pro democracy,
no matter what you click on.

Speaker 2 (04:23):
No matter what.

Speaker 1 (04:24):
That's sort of that's what I've read in the New
York Times, and so of course we were like, why
not put the podcast on YouTube? Apparently a lot of
people listen to podcasts, you know, listen to podcasts on YouTube.
I'd people like to watch podcasts. People love to have
that video element, you know, And so we were like, yes,
let's record our session in this beautiful studio. Of course,

(04:44):
in my mind, I was it never occurred to me
where would the cameras go?

Speaker 2 (04:49):
It never occurred to me. Where would the cameras go?
It never occurred to me, like how would I respond
to a tramera? I think I was sort of like, well,
like it'll be almost like surveillance footage. I was expecting
like a camera in the corner of the room that
I don't think is there. I was expecting like almost
no light. And then like maybe they could even do
it like reality show like when they're like hooking up

(05:10):
with someone. It would be sort of that like green
like filter when you're like looking at night vision.

Speaker 3 (05:15):
And can I describe like what it is?

Speaker 4 (05:18):
Like wait, please, there's two huge cameras. These are not iPhones,
just subtly in the massive like rolling like film cameras.
And then there's very bright lights right on me. Yeah,
well the lights around me.

Speaker 1 (05:33):
Well, again, you did come, as we said, you did come.
More camera ready than we did. You're sort of wearing
an expensive looking sweater. Yeah I made this, well you
made it. Well you should tell.

Speaker 2 (05:42):
Them and for a lot, sweetheart, you made.

Speaker 1 (05:46):
Yeah, oh my god, it's gorgeous.

Speaker 3 (05:47):
Thank you so much, but not like for today especially
Okay you camera say that, I mean for the camera,
like I love that you're like, but I don't mean
like there's my shot, the pivoting to video and I'm
going to be on there. Podcasts.

Speaker 1 (06:00):
Well, you're here to promote your sweater line, right, yeah, wow.

Speaker 3 (06:05):
Yeah, Mohir Higgins does it again.

Speaker 4 (06:08):
But I think you I listened to your pocket It
sounds exactly the same, does it Like I'm just here
looking at you, and it feels like I'm listening to
the podcast. But also I can see you both and
it's not You're not like painfully symmetrical, but it is
he You're both very beautiful.

Speaker 1 (06:22):
Okay, Well we were told painfully they.

Speaker 2 (06:24):
Said it hurt.

Speaker 3 (06:25):
Yeah something since then.

Speaker 1 (06:26):
Yeah, we got we wanted to be. We said, can
you make us a little tiny bit asymmetrical? I just
want a little freckle here, a little just.

Speaker 3 (06:34):
A little more.

Speaker 4 (06:35):
I know, if you make perfume, you're supposed to put
a little bit of dirt in it, or earth or
like a little dander or something to make humans see.

Speaker 3 (06:42):
It as real. Yeah, so maybe you did that to
your faces.

Speaker 2 (06:45):
We did that. Actually, you're so right.

Speaker 1 (06:46):
It's sort of an Uncanny Valley type thing, like if
something looks too perfect, too symmetrical, you're afraid of it.

Speaker 2 (06:52):
Yeah, And we're both really drawn to imperfection in our work,
so we just wanted to reflect that in our you know.

Speaker 1 (06:56):
Physical We're very inspired by Cindy Crawford's little mole, and
we try to sort of like Cindy Crawford on the
Oh the all have a name?

Speaker 3 (07:09):
It should? She inspires you, yeah, oh.

Speaker 1 (07:12):
Oh the mole? Yeah, Brenda, I.

Speaker 2 (07:14):
Guess I'm Marilyn Monroe has a mole.

Speaker 1 (07:17):
But that's fake what draw on? That's a drawn on mall.
Cindy Crawford sort of built on Marilyn Monroe's mole by
having it be natural.

Speaker 2 (07:25):
In Hollywood, there's a rich tradition of moles.

Speaker 1 (07:28):
That is wait, actually have to talk about that, Robert
de Niro, Robert de Niro, I'm trying to think of Sam.

Speaker 3 (07:35):
You do have a pretty one right there, Yes, you do.

Speaker 1 (07:37):
You know what, you have one that's surgically given hands
in the same place Colin Farrell has his.

Speaker 2 (07:43):
Wow.

Speaker 1 (07:45):
Wow, maybe they should have replaced you with Colin Farrell
instead of Jake John Hall, although you know what, Jake
Joel also I think has them all around there.

Speaker 2 (07:51):
Oh my god, this is crazy. I'm freaking out. I
actually feel like I'm chosen for like a film now. Well,
like it's like, oh, like now that this is being
pointed out on camera, that's like, bye, George, enjoy the podcast.

Speaker 1 (08:06):
Yeah, sorry, sorry. I have a completely flawless face with
no spots or freckles.

Speaker 3 (08:12):
That's masally perfect.

Speaker 1 (08:14):
Classes just glasses. Yeah, and by the way, I don't
need them. I just needed something to unclify me a
little bit.

Speaker 2 (08:21):
I also when we came in here, I also felt like,
you know, like in a Star is Born, when they're
recording in the studio and she's like being stiff and weird,
and Bradley Cooper's like, I know what to do, bring
a piano in here, and she's like it's too much,
too much, I could never do it. And then she
gets the piano in there and it like works perfectly,
and she's like suddenly in her vibe again, I was like,

(08:43):
oh my, what's my piano? Because like the bright lights
and like all the people looking, and I was like,
what am I gonna do? That like keeps me grounded
and reminds me that I'm just that like girl from
Jersey or California. It was very unclear where she was
from in that movie.

Speaker 1 (08:57):
She was from Long Island, but then the Living CALLI, well,
she moved there to be a star. Her dad lived there, well,
he moved there to support her. In the beginning, she
am I crazy. In the beginning, she like goes back
to her house in Long Island.

Speaker 2 (09:11):
I think it had sort of a euphoria disease where
it's like where is this? Yeah that's fair, yeah exactly.

Speaker 3 (09:18):
But wait, so what are you doing to keep grounded?

Speaker 2 (09:21):
That's a great question. I actually don't have a device
or a piano, but I think I was trying to
find it internally.

Speaker 3 (09:27):
What is internally?

Speaker 4 (09:28):
Oh yeah, because that happened in Titanic. There was a
band down underground, like you know in the in the
poor People's parates of the ship, and James Cameron just
like found them in a pub in Ireland or something,
and he was like this is this is like the
perfect like wild Irish band to like play traditional music,
and then they were all too shy with the camera.

Speaker 1 (09:49):
I mean, I do think it's a real Yeah, I
almost think. I almost think nine of being any kind
of successful celebrity is to deal with technology around you,
like the things you need. Imagine recording like being Whitney
Houston and recording like one of the most beautiful songs
of all time that is all happening in a studio

(10:12):
with shit everywhere, and like people like you know, sort
of like dialing in and out and telling her do this,
do that? I mean, how do you. I truly think
that's like ninety percent of the job. Imagine actually being
in a film set, like being Nicole Kidman and being
in the hours and being like, well I'm gonna walk
into the water now.

Speaker 3 (10:29):
Yeah, and some and with her nose and everything like and.

Speaker 1 (10:32):
Someone is just off camera and he's like chewing gum.

Speaker 2 (10:34):
Right. I was watching behind the scenes recently. I'm not
proud of it. It was and it was I'm not
proud of what but it was just like the last
of Us. I watched it and then it was like
and then they keep going and they're like when we
were shooting this, and I was like, sure, I'll watch this,
and I was like, wait, you literally like so it's
all fake avatar behind the scenes they're in a warehouse.

(10:57):
Because I'm like, no, no, no, I'm pretty sure I
saw them do it. Yeah, I'm like, I'm pretty sure
it was all one take like that. I watched the episode.
They never called cut.

Speaker 4 (11:06):
Yeah, yeah, those behind this there. You don't get a
choice on whether you want.

Speaker 3 (11:11):
To watch them.

Speaker 2 (11:11):
No, they just come up.

Speaker 4 (11:13):
And it's always like the same kind of like bearded
man just in it in a chair, just talking about
like how clever, what a clever idea he has. I'm
not give you any credits to the poor old like
actors who did the thing.

Speaker 1 (11:25):
Yeah, it's sort of crazy. I have to say, though,
It's like catnap to me. I will always watch it
behind the scenes FEATURETTE. I will always watch a blooper
reel and I will always watch I'm sorry to say,
an interview with an actor talking about the.

Speaker 2 (11:36):
Part, well, especially those, Yeah, I love those.

Speaker 4 (11:40):
I think I just don't like the director explaining how
he just manipulated you so true, you.

Speaker 1 (11:45):
Know, the director. It's also like I understand that you
made all this happen, but be quiet, like you showed
the way, like we've seen the work.

Speaker 3 (11:55):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (11:55):
Like I actually think an actor has more of a
right to speak than a director.

Speaker 2 (11:59):
Yeah, because they've not been allowed to say their words
exactly exactly, Yeah, the director.

Speaker 1 (12:03):
If you need to explain further, you've failed. Yeah, it's
like going the worst And apologies to all my friends
who have written books. The worst book event where someone's
being interviewed and they're like and then it clicked on
OT for chapter two and I'm like, no, no, no, no,
let me read it.

Speaker 2 (12:20):
Wow.

Speaker 3 (12:20):
Yeah you don't like that?

Speaker 2 (12:22):
No, Yeah, so you wrote a book. You write a book,
explain yourself and how much did you speak about the book,
by the way, how much let speak the book speak
for you, by the way.

Speaker 1 (12:31):
Please welcome to Mave Higgins.

Speaker 3 (12:34):
Thank you for having right. Yeah.

Speaker 4 (12:36):
I did record my book in this very studio for
the audiobook, but I didn't have cameras.

Speaker 1 (12:41):
Lines you should have read anyone around. You should have
recorded the video and then released it on YouTube. But
that would have done really great for sales numbers.

Speaker 4 (12:48):
Where I just came in here with my phone, just
whispered it in so when nobody else is using the place.

Speaker 1 (12:52):
Did you enjoy the process of recording an audiobook to me,
it's actually something that seems so glamorous, Like, yes, it's
because I am mad and like, well, I imagine sort
of writing a memoir and then like going into the
studio and being like and then I arrived at lax.

Speaker 2 (13:12):
I feel like I already wrote it, and now you
want me to read it too, Like it's like, I
can't go through this again.

Speaker 4 (13:18):
But didn't you ever, like because I liked reading out
loud in school and like I was, I was like
like I did like readings in at the church, and
you know, just because I wanted to like people to
look at me and me to be like my voice.

Speaker 1 (13:33):
Yeah, well you do have a great, incredible.

Speaker 3 (13:36):
Voice, Thank you so much. Little joke.

Speaker 4 (13:40):
But I reading it, Reading it is hard because you
think then like you start to kind of edit in
your head, but it's too late because it's.

Speaker 1 (13:47):
Totally totally published. I guess maybe what I would want
is to be a professional audiobook reader that could read
like a different person's book.

Speaker 3 (13:57):
That would be a lovely job, that would be nice.

Speaker 1 (13:59):
Well, I always love when they have, like Helen Mirren
reading a book.

Speaker 2 (14:02):
I think we're caught up in like reading a book
for an audiobook. Is that it's like to like performing
the sort of like calm, like I wish it were
like slightly more conversational. Have you something about like that?
There's like a self importance to it that's like, well, no,
talk to me normal, like read the book normal.

Speaker 1 (14:22):
Have you heard clips of Bonan Farrerh reading his book
about reporting out the Harvey Weinstein story. No, he does
voices and he will do like a Russian accent. He's
like literally like narrating his book, and it'll be like
and then the guy said to me, what I know,
that's not Russian? What you that's my that's me doing
a Russian accent.

Speaker 2 (14:44):
That's always the question of like how nice do you
be to someone, Like do you like call them out
instantly or do you just sort of like let them understand.

Speaker 1 (14:49):
Well, I sort of last minute, last minute, decided I can't.
I wouldn't know where to begin with a Russian accent,
and so I just went for like the easiest possible thing. Yeah, yeah,
which was sort of Pirates of the Caribbean. You miss
believing in those stories you're in one, Well, can we
get a piano in here?

Speaker 4 (15:06):
Rosamond Pike does a really good job. Yes, she's because
she's such a good actor.

Speaker 1 (15:10):
Such a good actor is not an actor. He's jealous,
but you know what, you'd be surprised at how sort
of he really comes alive in the audiobook format. I
think Ronan Pharaoh. Here's what I say about Pharaoh. I
think he's always wanted to be on camera. I think
he secretly wants to be truly like a theater actor.

Speaker 3 (15:28):
Too symmetrical, definitely symmetrical, not.

Speaker 2 (15:31):
Talking about talk about it, like like you should be hot,
and it's like this is crazy, but I'm like.

Speaker 1 (15:44):
They're cutting out our MIC's Yeah, it is like he's like,
why did you start believing in me being hot?

Speaker 2 (15:54):
But it's like he's like as a perfect face does.
But it's like, what's going on here?

Speaker 1 (16:02):
He is a fascinating figure to me. I would love
to get a coffee with him.

Speaker 2 (16:06):
Yes, yeah, what would your goal in the conversation with
him be?

Speaker 1 (16:10):
Well, first of all, I would go in and fully
pretend we are equals. No part of me would be
like I love your work, like nothing like that. I
would like, I would be I would be completely neutral,
and then my goal would be to gaslight him and
wanting him wanting to impress me. Yeah, and then at
the end of it we would be actually good friends
and potentially, you know, plan another day.

Speaker 4 (16:35):
I think his like the way to become friends with
him is like admire how hard he works.

Speaker 3 (16:41):
That seems to be really impress He doesn't need.

Speaker 4 (16:43):
To work hard at all, because he's like brilliant and
and and well yeah exactly, but but he loves to
talk about a lot, like all night, I threat more deadlines,
you know. And by the way, he could say that
to him, Yeah, he's greatest job. I you could say
that to him. Yeah, there's a tip.

Speaker 1 (17:02):
I think, you know what I think about him, Okay,
I think so he famously was a sort of child genius,
Like he went to college at sixteen, He went to
law school at like eighteen, Like that's like a big
part of his narrative. Then he was like immediately had
his own show on like MSNBC or something. And I

(17:22):
think sometimes what happens with people like that is when
they finally are of a normal adult age, they are
stripped of the title of kid. Genius because they're no
longer a kid. Oh no, they don't know what the
next chapter is.

Speaker 2 (17:34):
Yeah. Well this kind of gets into like Twitter being
obsessed with like if you were gifted, you're depressed now it's.

Speaker 1 (17:39):
It's actually exactly that. Yeah you know about this may
have no but there's a sort of subgenre of a
line of thinking that's all about how if you were
a gifted kid, now you are struggling more than potentially
political prisoners. It is the worst fate. One is like

(18:00):
if you were in the gifted program, now you are depressed,
you're bisexuals, are unable to hold down a job.

Speaker 2 (18:08):
I would say it's essential like millennial cringe, Yes, exactly,
Like it's very like me at five, you're gifted, me
at twenty five, I'm anxious exactly.

Speaker 3 (18:20):
Oh yeah, But like you think Ronan Barrow has more
of a like I was gifted and so now I'm
driven more than because he's not like moping.

Speaker 1 (18:29):
Well, I do think he's driven out, but I also
do think there is a difficulty in like it's not
sure he's doing fine, but it's also like what is
the next move, Like what does Ronan Pharaoh look like
at forty at fifty.

Speaker 3 (18:40):
Can you do an impression.

Speaker 2 (18:43):
Me at twelve? I'm going to college at forty? Why
am I weird?

Speaker 3 (18:54):
I can't believe they're complaining about being gifted children.

Speaker 2 (18:57):
It's such a thing, but it's.

Speaker 4 (18:58):
Such a lovely I mean, it's such a lovely thing
to believe for many years about yourself. No ready that
would stand to you.

Speaker 1 (19:04):
It's crazy that it's fake, Like it is literally just
made to it's made. It's all part of this system
of like put basically putting people in order so that
some people can get into like good colleges, and some
people get into bad colleges. Some people go to like
leadership camp, some can like take oh my god, an
advanced class like one year early, and then basically the

(19:27):
goal is to sort of know who's going to succeed
by the age of eleven.

Speaker 3 (19:31):
Wow.

Speaker 2 (19:31):
Well, And it's one of the saddest things is like
people that define themselves by like like a success like
and not just sort of like understand that they will
have successes and falls and so like these people are like, oh,
I was in the gifted program at ten, I'm set.
And then when they like face hardship at twenty five,
They're like, this wasn't supposed to happen, and it's like

(19:51):
you were literally resting on the laurels of being ten
in in a gifted program. You need to grow up.

Speaker 4 (19:57):
Yeah, but that I still have trouble with that, like, oh,
you're in a trough, but like it'll come back again,
you know, like it's you know, and you don't know
until you're dead, like what happened in the end, right.

Speaker 1 (20:07):
I guess that's also a time looking at.

Speaker 3 (20:10):
I'm always just like, what's that now?

Speaker 2 (20:12):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (20:13):
That needs to be better?

Speaker 1 (20:14):
So what how can someone be happy?

Speaker 2 (20:16):
Maybe?

Speaker 4 (20:21):
I guess if you if you're roning Pharaoh, I mean that's.

Speaker 1 (20:25):
A big if so step one.

Speaker 2 (20:30):
Yeah. I also want to say, if you're not roning
Pharaoh and you're listening to this, watching this on YouTube,
stop this isn't for you.

Speaker 4 (20:41):
But I think I feel like if you just don't
think about it too much, I mean, if you you
know what how to be happy?

Speaker 2 (20:53):
God?

Speaker 4 (20:54):
I do think some people have an easier time being
happy than others. Yes, and some people find life harder
than for no justification, like I'm not talking about.

Speaker 1 (21:04):
Actual no, no, you are you know.

Speaker 3 (21:06):
Some people are just like this is really hard.

Speaker 1 (21:09):
It's actually like one of the things that there's no
correct way to talk about because like without without like
talking about like specific things like mental illness or socioeconomic
status like this, that's not what we're talking about. It's
just some people, all else being equal, will be given
a life task and will find it harder than other people.

Speaker 3 (21:27):
Yes, totally, that's just one of their feelings. Yeah, yeah, totally.

Speaker 1 (21:32):
So is there a pill I can take?

Speaker 2 (21:35):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (21:36):
Actually, but that's why we do have all the little treats.

Speaker 2 (21:40):
That's why we have little treats.

Speaker 1 (21:41):
Yeah, that's true.

Speaker 2 (21:42):
Yeah, what's your little treat?

Speaker 3 (21:46):
So many things? Okay, next question, so many, so many,
so many things.

Speaker 2 (21:56):
You've never had a treat in your life? That's that's
what it sounds like, someone's never had to treat in
the life. Oh, I what's my treat? Everything I'm constantly concerning?

Speaker 3 (22:06):
Very happy?

Speaker 4 (22:07):
I mean that is That's the other thing as well,
that you that like if you do have that mentality, right,
is I have a thing, I'll do a thing, then
it's usually you have to pay for it. So that's
a problem. I guess, like talking to my friends, m
H is a real treat.

Speaker 1 (22:20):
Yeah, you gotta be careful which ones you talk to.

Speaker 3 (22:23):
Yeah, cutting them off is another real treat, exactly.

Speaker 2 (22:28):
Making them come crawling back.

Speaker 1 (22:30):
God, it's been a while since I've re like cut
someone out of my life.

Speaker 2 (22:32):
Oh I miss it other rush.

Speaker 3 (22:37):
Yeah, maybe you just did too many at once and
you don't I know.

Speaker 1 (22:40):
Yeah, I was sort of thinking about that the other day.
Not that I cut off people intentionally, but I was like,
I used to pride myself in not in all my
friends not being comedians. Like I was like, I have
I keep in touch with so many friends from college,
like I regularly, you know, if I were to have
a party, it would be fifty percent old friends, fifty
percent comedian friends. Whatever. And I think something happened, especially

(23:02):
during the pandemic, maybe a little before that. Maybe also
just like me spending more and more of my time
doing comedy related stuff where I'm like, we're down to
maybe three or four, like not like it is and
it's not healthy.

Speaker 3 (23:17):
Well isn't five the number though?

Speaker 1 (23:20):
What's five? Then five number of close friends?

Speaker 3 (23:23):
Yes? And and the like correct or possible?

Speaker 4 (23:26):
Yeah, I think it's you know, because you can have
there's only so much like time end resources that you have,
yes to really fully understand like.

Speaker 3 (23:36):
Your friend and see how they are.

Speaker 4 (23:39):
And I mean this is really just from something I
probably saw, you know a few years ago.

Speaker 3 (23:44):
I don't know, but it makes sense me. Five is
like the kind of number.

Speaker 2 (23:48):
Does a romantic partner count of the five or is
that a different category.

Speaker 3 (23:52):
I don't know. It depends if you're having sex with
them or not.

Speaker 1 (23:55):
Yeah, well the five is a number of PEO be
having sex with correct moment, at any moment, Well, you
should have five people somehow penetrated. Someone needs to be penetrated.

Speaker 3 (24:07):
Does that make sense to five hive?

Speaker 1 (24:09):
Five does actually make cli?

Speaker 3 (24:12):
Two names?

Speaker 1 (24:12):
Okay, Mave, Sam, George our producer. Everyone has set up
the camera and everyone and everyone listing at home. Okay,
don't you think And by the way, we're being like joking,
joke everyone. I just want to be clear. I want
to be friends with him.

Speaker 2 (24:31):
Yeah, okay, yeah, I think what's clear is that, like
you want to be friends with him, and it's like,
but we're not gonna just be like nice because he's
famous exactly, Like we're gonna be real and that's why
we're gonna be good friends. Yeah, we're gonna tell him, hey,
you look too perfect, something's.

Speaker 3 (24:46):
Up, And I'm telling you as a friend, we really
like your work, and then yeah, you're.

Speaker 1 (24:52):
You must have been gifted. Do you think that one
of the reasons why social media is so toxic is
because of or is you to care about more than
five people at any given time? Yes, Like I truly
think yeah, And this is not a novel observation, but
it's like, we are not meant to know that many people.
We're not meant to think about that many people on
any given day. And it's actually like the other day,

(25:15):
it's sort of like reverse engineering schizophrenia. Like you are
literally scrolling through voices in your head. Sure that are
not talking to you?

Speaker 3 (25:25):
Like you're scrolling, It means like fractured reality.

Speaker 1 (25:29):
Yeah, you're scrolling through like a billion people's random thoughts.
Imagine like having headphones in and imagine that but an
audio form to sort of talk of the podcasting audience.
Imagine being like, oh, you know what, I'm going to
scroll a bit, I'm gonna relax a bit, I'm gonna
put on headphones and then just listen to a cacophony
of one thousand people not even seeing anything of substance,

(25:51):
just being like being a gifted kid is.

Speaker 2 (25:53):
Bay Yeah, and then like getting randomly really really mad exactly. Yeah,
that sounds horrible.

Speaker 3 (26:00):
And we do that with our eyes, Yeah, with their eyes.

Speaker 1 (26:02):
And by the way, eyes are just as important as ears.
So if you don't do it with your ears, don't
do it with your eyes. That's what I tell all
my mentees is so good at that, and so is
your mouth. Yeah. What which the senses is the most important?

Speaker 2 (26:16):
Okay? Most important?

Speaker 5 (26:18):
Sight?

Speaker 3 (26:19):
I think, no, you go.

Speaker 4 (26:23):
Isn't it touch because you literally have There's like my
friend volunteers to cuddle new babies. Is they literally need
more than being talked to? Or actually they do need
water and food.

Speaker 1 (26:33):
That is actually a great point. It's maybe like touch
has been undervalued societally, and so we think sight is
the most important because.

Speaker 2 (26:41):
You know, wow, wow, I was like a newborn.

Speaker 1 (26:46):
We think sight is important because you know, we need
our eyes to look at advertisements, but actually touch is
way more important.

Speaker 3 (26:52):
Do you think the products to come around and just
touch you?

Speaker 1 (26:55):
Yeah, well that's them, thank you. That was gonna be
My next point is like how do we monetize touch.

Speaker 2 (26:59):
Touch based advertising? How can we make this podcast touch base?

Speaker 4 (27:03):
Yeah, wait, how can we make You can just do
life shows That's exactly what they do and they sell.

Speaker 3 (27:08):
Like VP tickets. Okay, they touch you yeaheah.

Speaker 1 (27:11):
We need to do a short of not Q and
a what is it called a meat and greet? Yeah,
that is the only way to monetize touch.

Speaker 2 (27:17):
But here's great, here's nothing oft.

Speaker 1 (27:25):
I figured out, Oh my god, this is genius. I
figured out why touch is difficult to monetize. It's not scalable.
Even when you do a meet and Greek, each person
individually has to like line up and touch you. There's
no podcast equivalent touch. You can make a film that
a billion people can see. You can make a podcast
that a billion people can hear. You can even make

(27:45):
a cent that a billion people can smell if you make.

Speaker 2 (27:48):
A candle.

Speaker 1 (27:51):
Or but there is yes, like exactly, there is literally
no way to scale. I don't a grand scale at
a global scale touch.

Speaker 4 (28:04):
There's that woman who goes around hugging people, but again
by one.

Speaker 2 (28:08):
Yeah, yeah, what is the most number of It's the
most anti capital exactly, literally touches the most anti capitalist sentence.

Speaker 1 (28:16):
This is a big idea.

Speaker 4 (28:21):
Well, I think, yeah, okay, so you want to. Sometimes
in concerts people run around and do like high five
everyone or something like that.

Speaker 3 (28:29):
And and then the people feel so special. I'm never
going to exactly exactly.

Speaker 1 (28:33):
One time, Janellemane crowdsurfed on my hand.

Speaker 3 (28:36):
Oh my god, yeah, which little parts of her body
to do?

Speaker 1 (28:39):
I don't remember. That's a great question, because of course
I see her as an artist and not as a
piece of flesh, So it would never occur to me
to even delineate between her different body parts because I
respect her to touch. But I distinctly remember I did
like I was like part of the crowd.

Speaker 2 (28:54):
That.

Speaker 1 (28:54):
Oh true, Wow, sort of cool.

Speaker 2 (28:56):
That is cool. What's the most capitalist sense?

Speaker 3 (28:59):
I gotta be eyes, I think so yeah.

Speaker 1 (29:02):
I mean that's what you used to see advertisements, but like.

Speaker 4 (29:06):
When you say to see your screen, it's like profiting
from someone else's labor.

Speaker 1 (29:10):
So like, oh see, I was thinking the most exploitable sense, like,
if you are selling a product, the easiest way to
someone is via their eyes.

Speaker 2 (29:20):
I mean, just look at the art industry exactly.

Speaker 3 (29:23):
I'm a buyer.

Speaker 1 (29:25):
Well, you're a collector, of course, and mostly of touch
based art.

Speaker 4 (29:29):
That's what we say, you've got to come and feel
my pieces. Environment is just covered in absolutely beautiful pieces.

Speaker 2 (29:39):
You know that should be real? Yeah?

Speaker 1 (29:42):
Wow, should we do yes?

Speaker 2 (29:54):
Segment. I also want to say one more thing about
the podcast when we make Okay Please, which is that
it's really hit me today how we are literally and
just like that, like we are and it's like freaking
me out because like they can't see this. There's a
window that's like looking out on New York. We're like
laughing and like drinking water and like I'm like, oh

(30:16):
my god, every time we laugh, I'm like we're like
a scene and just like that. And I feel like
a bit.

Speaker 1 (30:24):
Trippy thinking just like that should do a like a
podcast that is essentially a fully scripted, slash improvised version
of the podcast that they have on the show, so
you can follow obviously.

Speaker 2 (30:38):
Yeah, it's actually monetarily dumb that they hadn't done it.

Speaker 1 (30:42):
Yeah, yeah, what the hell is wrong with them?

Speaker 2 (30:44):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (30:44):
And it was her and two others was yeah it was.

Speaker 1 (30:47):
The guy from at TV. Oh yeah, yeah, Oh my god,
what's his name?

Speaker 2 (30:50):
He was?

Speaker 1 (30:51):
He was mother to me when I was a kid,
but I don't remembers name. Oh, god, well whatever, So
it was him, it was Chay and him.

Speaker 4 (30:57):
Yeah, yeah, I would absolutely recommend that.

Speaker 1 (31:01):
Yeah, I would listen the way I miss Chad as
they're coming back. Did you watch and just like that.

Speaker 4 (31:08):
Yeah, just the first episode. Actually, I just needed to
know what happened you keep going.

Speaker 1 (31:15):
I truly it was also something about that part of
the pandemic where I needed a Chad d.

Speaker 2 (31:22):
As culturally, we needed something to rally around.

Speaker 1 (31:25):
And I really don't remember the last time a television
character made that much of an impact.

Speaker 2 (31:29):
It was insane.

Speaker 3 (31:30):
So where are they now, the character or the actor.

Speaker 1 (31:35):
So in the end, spoiler alert for anyone listening, and.

Speaker 2 (31:39):
If you haven't finished, and just like that, stop listening
and let.

Speaker 1 (31:42):
Me just say something else our own and has finished
and just like that. So at the end of the season,
Miranda sort of like in a manic Pixie moment, drops
everything and moves to La to be with Chay while
Cha is there filming their pilot. And guess what else,
Miranda dyes her hair red. She's just the beginning. She

(32:04):
had great. Yeah, and that's actually sending mixed messages to me,
because you're supposed to think gray hair is empowering. You
will be wrong.

Speaker 2 (32:11):
Actually, red hair is empowering. You're dead wrong, You're fucking
dead wrong, bitch. She had given up and it was sad.
Now athetic now that she finally has a group back's hair,
Now she's embracing her queer self. She's ditching her dead
ass husband. He's not dead but sexually, yeah, yeah, that's right.

Speaker 3 (32:32):
He diesexually.

Speaker 4 (32:34):
And also, but can you imagine her just showing off
when you're taping a pilot in La I Worry, Well, you.

Speaker 1 (32:40):
Know what's gonna happen is basically the scene is gonna
be like cha is shooting the pilot? Yeah, and Miranda
comes up and Synthi Nixon is really good at doing
this sort of and acting this sort of desperation that
Miranda has, and just like that, it's like just it's
in the eyes. She's just like, I need to feel anything.
And so she's going to show up to this, to
the set and be like chay chay and like waving

(33:00):
and then be like what is she doing here? I'm
trying to do my job, yes.

Speaker 3 (33:04):
And the security guard.

Speaker 4 (33:06):
But you're right about that, because didn't she play this
character that had trapped in syndrome or something like that.
Miranda did it? Ords wasn't that her? Like she played
in your or something like that, you know where you
have something happens, do you get like a brain injury
and you're totally fine, but your body can't move. And

(33:26):
so she was only acting with her eyes, which you
think you might think so easy. I get paid.

Speaker 2 (33:35):
I would never diect.

Speaker 1 (33:39):
So she's really so yeah, I think for her role
as Miranda.

Speaker 4 (33:43):
Yeah, just kind of nobody, just eyes and you saw
that unless it was a completely different actress.

Speaker 1 (33:51):
No, no, no, no, I think it sounds like watch Red Hair.
Did you know she's an Amadaeus.

Speaker 3 (33:58):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (33:58):
Suddenly they like open the door and she's like there.
She just like plays the cleaning lady, plays the cleaning man,
and she actually I don't want to ruin it, but
it has a pretty big role. Oh, she's part of
a plan to sabotage something say that.

Speaker 2 (34:15):
I haven't watched the Yeah, exactly.

Speaker 1 (34:17):
She's running from air or governor whichever, whichever power. You know.
I went to her launch event at Stonewall.

Speaker 2 (34:24):
Oh, and you have to I wish I had.

Speaker 1 (34:26):
It was honestly a great night, I'm sure, And I
remember because she came out and the first thing she
said was I think she said like ladies, gentlemen, and
those who reject the gender binary. That's how she started
her speech. And I was like, well, she's losing.

Speaker 2 (34:40):
She's losing, but she's losing, but she's the door. Yeah,
I am a.

Speaker 1 (34:46):
Stand No, I was, I was pumped. I genuinely was like,
I love this. She's very smart and would make a
great politician, but she has more important things to do,
which is shoot and just like that and I'm d yeah,
they're rebooting that. Actually she's playing amadas. Okay, sorry, okay.

Speaker 2 (35:08):
Our first segment, Our first segment is called straight Shooters.
And then this segment, we ask you a series of
rapid pire questions. Is basically this thing, this other thing
to gauge your familiarity with and complicity in straight culture.
The only rule is you can't ask any follow up
questions or will fly off our rockers.

Speaker 1 (35:24):
We'll cut your camera.

Speaker 2 (35:25):
And I thought you were gonna say, like, cut your throats.

Speaker 1 (35:29):
I would never say that.

Speaker 2 (35:30):
Cut was so intense.

Speaker 4 (35:32):
It's like whoa, but that's like killing met turning off
the camera.

Speaker 1 (35:37):
We're actually gonna keep you here and finish the episode,
but turn off your spotlight so that you look worse
than in the video.

Speaker 3 (35:45):
I'll be so good.

Speaker 2 (35:47):
Okay, hold on, let me find my notes. App got it? Okay?
Maybe HBO's loas of Spooky's well RuPaul's drag race, selena
s titties.

Speaker 1 (36:00):
So spooky, oh, okay, Taking the high road or taking
the subway, taking the highroad.

Speaker 2 (36:08):
Okay, a trend forecast or a prophecy foretold?

Speaker 3 (36:13):
Oh a prophecy foretold.

Speaker 1 (36:16):
Being a hoarder or being inspired by Billy Porter.

Speaker 3 (36:20):
Being inspired by Billy Porter.

Speaker 2 (36:22):
Okay, walkable cities or petable kiddies.

Speaker 1 (36:28):
Middle brow trash, being awarded, or developing a rash that
you need to get sorted.

Speaker 3 (36:33):
Developing a rash get sorted.

Speaker 2 (36:36):
Being concerned about the future of film, understanding that whatever
happens is God's will. That's good.

Speaker 3 (36:45):
Being concerned about the future of.

Speaker 1 (36:46):
Film, keeping it mellow in mar a lago or starring
in a fellow.

Speaker 3 (36:50):
As Iago, starring in Othello as Iago. Wow?

Speaker 4 (36:57):
Now can I ask question, what's the aim of it?
Your complicity to know, but so to measure your complicity
like you're being so deeply investigating there.

Speaker 2 (37:10):
You're being so like like, oh, I was a gifted child.
Here's what's like.

Speaker 1 (37:15):
Trip this segment is like, yeah, basically there are two
kinds of thinking mathematical thinking and artistic thinking, and what
this women and men and women. But you're sort of
rejecting the gender binary by being a man right now
and doing mathematical thinking. So basically what trips people up
with this segment is we ask things in a mathematical

(37:37):
way because we're like number is one thing or another thing, okay,
But then we judge you based on a performance rather
than any sort of like logical like, it is not
about whether you pick the right thing, and it's not
about whether you quote unquote know how it works. It's
about making an entrance and putting up and making an impact.

Speaker 2 (37:55):
It's essentially about nothing. There's no goal. Yeah, it's more
about sort of looking inward and you know, learning to
love yourself.

Speaker 3 (38:02):
I understand, and I feel good.

Speaker 1 (38:05):
Actually, yeah, I actually did a really good job until,
of course the end when you ask what the rule?

Speaker 2 (38:11):
So I'm going to say seven hundred and thirty two doves.

Speaker 1 (38:14):
Out of a thousand.

Speaker 4 (38:15):
Okay, I'm actually delights without that.

Speaker 2 (38:21):
That's good.

Speaker 1 (38:22):
Do you ever sort of like going back to the
mathematical verse satistic thinking. Yeah, do you ever find yourself
This happens to me a lot where I'll be like
really going in on something and someone will tell me like, Okay,
you made your point, and I'm like, I wasn't making
a point. I was completing your performance, that is, And
if you thought I was making a point, that is

(38:42):
on you.

Speaker 2 (38:43):
No, that's fight. When someone's like, okay, you made your point.
H yeah, oh so you want a silence, right, Yeah,
it's like, well now I'm pissed.

Speaker 1 (38:51):
But it's also like you don't care about pros like
you just care about making a point. I'm not a politician.
I'm a stylist.

Speaker 2 (38:57):
Yeah, and I'm giving a critique and I'm giving a critique.
There's a lot of different angles to it.

Speaker 1 (39:01):
Yeah, and you're not my editor, sweetheart.

Speaker 2 (39:02):
Oh this is the brainstorming set actually.

Speaker 4 (39:05):
But there's such an honesty in not because because what
I say to be benepulitive is like I'm just thinking this.

Speaker 1 (39:11):
Through one hundred thinking it through.

Speaker 3 (39:13):
I know exactly what I'm saying.

Speaker 2 (39:15):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (39:16):
Wow, So it's much more honest to be like I'm
not finished my performance exactly.

Speaker 3 (39:20):
Yeah, that's gorgeous, and actually.

Speaker 1 (39:22):
Just accepting that every conversation is a performance. It is
a little duet, I mean even and and by the way,
there is a winner.

Speaker 2 (39:31):
There's always a winner. This in particular, I actually do
feel more performative, of course, in a way that is like, oh,
like it's actually gonna help. I think like we.

Speaker 1 (39:41):
Can meaning us being recorded and recorded and sitting around
this table and knowing people are literally like hired to
like put up a light.

Speaker 2 (39:50):
I'm like, yeah, we're in when I play.

Speaker 1 (39:54):
When I play, and it is about a dinner party
that goes wrong, and.

Speaker 2 (39:57):
It's fully improvised. I want to talk about a dinner
party aspect, but I don't know if we should get
into it right now.

Speaker 1 (40:04):
Okay, do I know what I'm trying to do. I'm
trying to look into your eyes and okay, dinner party.

Speaker 4 (40:11):
No, let's okay.

Speaker 2 (40:16):
Should we need to.

Speaker 3 (40:17):
Get to the observer effect?

Speaker 1 (40:19):
Okay, yeah, but I want Oh, what's the observer effect?

Speaker 3 (40:22):
Just the thing watched changes the thing being watched.

Speaker 2 (40:25):
Well, yes, that's okay.

Speaker 1 (40:26):
That's actually sort of what I was attempting very poorly
to get at when I was talking about how like
ninety percent of being a celebrity is being able to
like tune out the cameras or whatever.

Speaker 2 (40:34):
Yeah, it's like, yeah, in fact, you.

Speaker 1 (40:36):
Can't separate the materiality of the technology no recording something
from the performance itself or even the awareness exactly. Yeah,
that's why theater that that's literally like the difference between
different media, like the medium of theater is different from
the medium of television and the medium of film, partly
because of the mechanics that make.

Speaker 2 (40:57):
It possible cam learning.

Speaker 1 (41:01):
Okay, I have a question for you may have and
I hate the fact that I'm even asking this. I
hate myself for asking this.

Speaker 2 (41:08):
Oh wow, but I have it.

Speaker 1 (41:10):
But I but unfortunately, if we have you here, there's
like no way for me to not ask this. Every
question is I've had this theory for at this point
about a year and a half that Ireland is trending
and I know that it's so if someone said that
to me about something I'm associated with, I would be
like truly funk off. But I can't forgive myself for

(41:31):
not asking.

Speaker 2 (41:32):
Well, gay is not to me.

Speaker 1 (41:33):
It started with obviously, it started with Sally Rooney and I.

Speaker 3 (41:38):
Think name is Marxist novelist exactly.

Speaker 1 (41:40):
I think Bantes of Sharon was huge. I also think
there is a reaction against all the sort of like
Jubilee Queen dying attention that England got, and people are like, literally,
what is the alternative to minutes?

Speaker 3 (41:59):
No?

Speaker 2 (42:00):
Do you feel that ancesters Irish too?

Speaker 1 (42:02):
Huh?

Speaker 2 (42:02):
Bad sister's Irish too.

Speaker 1 (42:03):
That's the other Bad Sisters. Wait, that was literally my
third one and I forgot Thank.

Speaker 3 (42:06):
You, Bad Sisters.

Speaker 4 (42:08):
And it's so funny because one thing I was thinking
of as a topic for this was like English, and
then I just felt like, no, I don't want to
get like into nationalism, you know, like and be Irish
in that way, but like the English language I meant
very true.

Speaker 3 (42:25):
But then I think you're right.

Speaker 4 (42:27):
And it's so interesting that you picked up in it,
because whenever I go home, there's like they're calling it
like the Celtic Revival or something.

Speaker 2 (42:33):
It's like, hey, so it is a thing. Yeah, yeah,
I wish we had like a Belding ring.

Speaker 1 (42:41):
Because I have to say, like, it's really rare that sorry,
I actually you need to let you talk. But all
I want to say is that all these things I
mentioned so often when something is like trending. It's in
a sense overrated. But guess what, I love Benshism in
a share and I love bad sisters and ultimately critiques aside,
I love Silent, so.

Speaker 3 (42:59):
I love her too.

Speaker 1 (43:00):
It's all of it is good, which is so rare.
I'm almost afraid to put a name to it because
then someone's going to take advantage of it and produce
bad Irish art.

Speaker 4 (43:09):
Well, I mean, we'll see. It's interesting that, like I
went to The Quiet Girl, is this Irish film that's
in Irish, in Irish language, and it's nominated for an
Oscar plus like twenty five percent of all acting nominees
this year.

Speaker 3 (43:22):
Are Irish exactly.

Speaker 4 (43:24):
It's a country with like four point two million people
in it, very smaller than the population in New York.

Speaker 3 (43:30):
You know, it's tiny.

Speaker 4 (43:31):
But anyway, when I go home, the thing that's interesting
is more people are learning Irish language. A lot of
my friends who lived in Dublin moved to the west
coast of Ireland, which is.

Speaker 3 (43:42):
More like there's it's more.

Speaker 4 (43:46):
I mean, it's hard to explain, but like old Ireland,
I suppose in the way that like you'd picture so
as in Dublin is has like hate and m and
Starbucks and it's like the headquarters of Google and Facebook
are there, and it's just like Dublin. But then you know,
if you go to the other parts of Ireland, there's
like Irish speaking and just a slower pace.

Speaker 1 (44:08):
Like my family is like Greece and they're yeah, very equivalent.
Like if you go to like they're called like the
villages in Greece, it's simply like, yeah, it's like you're
in a different time period.

Speaker 4 (44:18):
Yeah, and yeah, it's just like tricky because there's a
whole industry built around, like you know, the Irish diasper,
and like there was a thing where people thought maybe
The Bounches was set now, and it's set in nineteen
twenty three, so like something that I have to kind
of be careful, but I think you're right. And the
thing about it is the art coming out of Ireland

(44:40):
I think is really cool at the moment. And but
a funny thing about that too, Like when I went
to see The Quaker, like the movie here, it was
you know, like a New York screening where they invited
a bunch of Irish people and there was a state
minister there like you know, just this guy who came
out like a young government minister from Ireland because like
it was funded like a lot by Irish government. And

(45:02):
I got asked because I write as well, you know,
and I got like an email from like the Irish
Tourist Board being like we're taking journalists to the island
where the Banshi's a ministure was filmed and you know,
we'd bring you there for three days and three nights
and like which when I was like, but like the
government is like supporting the film industry in that very

(45:26):
intense way, so that helps.

Speaker 3 (45:29):
Yeah, you know I didn't do that.

Speaker 4 (45:32):
No, an absolutely no, because like, yeah, I tell me.

Speaker 1 (45:36):
I almost went to that screening of the Choir Girl.
Oh and I like had something with my sister or
something that day and I couldn't go. But I it's
very special films, Okay, I need to watch it.

Speaker 4 (45:46):
It's beautiful, Yeah it is. And it's also like I
think a good example of virshnists because it's not playing
and it's not you know, it's like not too dark
either because like a lot of especially theater is just.

Speaker 3 (46:00):
Like the baby died and the baby still did.

Speaker 4 (46:04):
And like there is a bit of that, but like
it's not too much, so it gets that nice balance.
And there's just like very cool, very young Irish people
and doing interesting things I think.

Speaker 1 (46:15):
And yeah, even aside from Sally Rooney, I means, yeah,
that's what I'm thinking of.

Speaker 2 (46:24):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (46:26):
Wow, well I'm really glad I asked that.

Speaker 2 (46:29):
I can't believe that's I love when you have something
that's actually for a guest specific I know, and then
it's correct.

Speaker 1 (46:35):
Well I really have really that was Pharaoh. Yeah, I
really have been. Like so much of the stuff I've
enjoyed over the past year has some Irish also, like
Rashid Murphy releasing you album. There's just like there are
things happening constantly and I'm always like I gotta go.

Speaker 2 (46:50):
Oh.

Speaker 1 (46:50):
And also so many people who are traveling to Ireland,
which I don't know how that is, like because as
you know, as someone who like is from a very
touristy place, I know that that can be a double
edged sword, where like sometimes increased tourism can be bad
for the locals. But is that something that you're well,
your family has.

Speaker 4 (47:10):
I mean, it's it's like five it's only five and
a half hours, so you know, I always say, like.

Speaker 3 (47:15):
It's closing in Los Angeles, which it is. I think
it is. Yeah, Ireland.

Speaker 1 (47:21):
I would actually love to do a live show and
and where Banches of an Asharan was set.

Speaker 4 (47:27):
Oh, like I would say, it's so gorgeous and part
of me, like when I see like The Quaker, which
is set in like where a place my grandma's from,
and the Banshees where it's an island, and like it's
you know, so familiar to me, and I feel I
do feel like what am I doing here?

Speaker 1 (47:43):
Yeah, totally you're kidding me.

Speaker 2 (47:46):
Yes, And I go back to Greece.

Speaker 1 (47:47):
Yeah, it's like yeah, literally, I'm like, I mean, Ireland
is even the country than Greece. So I do think
for you it would be slightly more of a possibility,
Like I literally don't even know what it was if
I were to move back in a cafe. But yeah,
it's crazy, like everything is cheaper, it is beautiful, the
weather is better, my family is there. Yeah, you're sort

(48:08):
of like, why am I getting sweet Green?

Speaker 3 (48:14):
I know, I know, but it's just you know, for now.

Speaker 1 (48:18):
Yes, of course it's changing.

Speaker 3 (48:20):
Like I said earlier, we don't know the end until
we're dead.

Speaker 2 (48:22):
It's true.

Speaker 3 (48:22):
Remember when I.

Speaker 2 (48:23):
Said that, Yeah, and I will maybe the last one
we ever.

Speaker 3 (48:26):
Have help you. You might get barred from Sweet Green.

Speaker 1 (48:31):
Actually yeah, well I think that. I mean, all this
international talk leads so well into our topic.

Speaker 2 (48:38):
M M. Maybe tell us what you've brought today and
sort of what about it is straight to you?

Speaker 3 (48:43):
Okay?

Speaker 4 (48:44):
So my topic is green card marriages slash the K
one fiance visa. Okay, So that's the step you take.

Speaker 3 (48:52):
Before you do green card marriage. If you're an American
engaged to somebody from a different country and they come
over here and they have three months to decide, you know,
they have to leave at the end of three months
or they have to get married.

Speaker 4 (49:07):
Which is why it was like a genius taking clock
idea for a TV show ninety Day Fiance.

Speaker 2 (49:11):
I didn't realize it was ninety days. Yeah. It was
literally based on the frame the legal friends sponsored by
the government. Yeah, that's crazy, isn't that crazy?

Speaker 4 (49:20):
But I and I was thinking to myself, I'm sure
it's very straight, you know, because it's obviously like all contracted,
it's basically it's marriage.

Speaker 3 (49:30):
But then I was like I should check. So I
was like looking at it just.

Speaker 4 (49:34):
On my phone on my way, Like I was like
looking at the data and it's almost all women who
come over to get married to straight men in America.

Speaker 3 (49:43):
Does that make it straight?

Speaker 1 (49:45):
I think that makes it first of all, Yes, that
makes it.

Speaker 2 (49:47):
But at the same time, it's a sleigh because it's
women doing it. Then it's kind of like, well, if.

Speaker 1 (49:51):
It's women doing it, then they're taking charge of their lives.

Speaker 3 (49:53):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (49:54):
Yeah, they're manipulating it what they want.

Speaker 4 (49:58):
Yeah, you just have be married for two years, I think,
and then you get your citizenship.

Speaker 1 (50:03):
And then you can get divorced.

Speaker 3 (50:04):
Then you can get divorced, but you do have for
two years.

Speaker 1 (50:08):
Here's my question in ninety day Fiance, which I wish
I had done some research and watched some of In
ninety fiance, is there any pretense of them attempting to
actually have a relationship or is it purely transactional.

Speaker 4 (50:21):
No, you have to convince the government, you have to
get letters from your friends. There's a whole process where
you have to convince people that it's real. Okay, so
there's no there's like it's like a cover up of
the transaction, which is you know, I think you don't
have to have seen the show. I don't think, even
though it's one of the most popular shows in.

Speaker 1 (50:39):
I know it's crazy. Yeah, I mean one of our
blind spots is reality television. Yeah, and stand we don't know.

Speaker 2 (50:45):
We watched drag Race and that's kind of yeah.

Speaker 1 (50:47):
And then I in the past have watched one of
the Housewives and vandor Primp Rules, but it's been years.

Speaker 4 (50:51):
So well, I'm not a big watcher either. But my
friend works on night worked on night day Fiance, and
I got so curious about it because I could hear
her sometimes interfeering the men here, and like you have
to be like you want to put people on TV
that are like funny and like maybe weird, but like

(51:13):
not like disgusting.

Speaker 2 (51:15):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (51:16):
Right, So the men want a girlfriend, yeah, and they.

Speaker 3 (51:20):
Have I mean really they want a wife.

Speaker 1 (51:22):
They want a wife.

Speaker 3 (51:23):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (51:24):
And here's my question, I guess is like why do
they prefer an international wife to an American?

Speaker 2 (51:30):
Right, because the assumption is of course that they like
can't find a wife without like you know, having something
to manipul.

Speaker 1 (51:37):
I see. So that's what it is. It's like these
men that feel like they could not get a wife
unless they have something to offer her.

Speaker 2 (51:43):
Yeah, that's what it is.

Speaker 3 (51:44):
Yeah, I mean that's the assumption.

Speaker 1 (51:46):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (51:46):
I mean some of them gave other justifications, like they're like,
you know, like often problematic things like I just prefer
Filipino women.

Speaker 2 (51:55):
Like it's the Celtic Revival, so like let's do it.

Speaker 3 (51:57):
Yeah, yeah, she's the next Sealing Roon.

Speaker 2 (52:00):
I couldn't.

Speaker 1 (52:04):
Actually she is salary salary. Wait, salary is yeah, girl,
you do not have to do that.

Speaker 2 (52:10):
You're successful knowing that's like just goes to show you,
like how messed up the book industry. Yeah, she's like,
I'm doing it to take a.

Speaker 3 (52:17):
Point normal people. Okay, I am one, Yeah exactly. Yeah,
I don't know. I am.

Speaker 4 (52:23):
I think that they I mean, American citizenship is is
a real price, of course.

Speaker 3 (52:28):
You know.

Speaker 4 (52:30):
But it's also when I think about it, I think
about like is that everything they have?

Speaker 3 (52:35):
Like that's all they have?

Speaker 4 (52:36):
Right, because like you think, Okay, you want to be
in a transaction with something, you want to be you
want to make a contract like you marry someone. In
that way, you're saying like I'm giving you this and
you're giving me this, and really that's what they're saying
they're just saying I have you just by dint of
being born.

Speaker 3 (52:50):
They're like, this is all I've got.

Speaker 4 (52:52):
And often they're very very poor, like they're from like
really isolated parts of America. These are not like you know,
they're like kind of high achieving. They're not the Rowan
Fowers of the of America.

Speaker 1 (53:06):
Got it.

Speaker 3 (53:07):
Yeah, But what they do have is American citizenship. Wow.

Speaker 1 (53:10):
There's something so deeply sad about that.

Speaker 3 (53:13):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (53:14):
I'm the only person at pointed.

Speaker 2 (53:15):
That as whoa biting cultural commentary.

Speaker 1 (53:18):
So I think that's sort of devastating. Basically my response
to ninety I'm afraid to speak. Sorry, not to be
condescending by I think they deserve love.

Speaker 2 (53:29):
No, thank you for saying that.

Speaker 1 (53:31):
But for me, yeah, it makes me want to slip
my rest.

Speaker 3 (53:34):
Wiped a smile off my face.

Speaker 2 (53:36):
Wow.

Speaker 3 (53:37):
Wow, Yeah, I mean it's sad. It's also like it
makes for good TV.

Speaker 1 (53:41):
Of course. Yeah, I'm sure you feel this way as
a as someone who immigrated to America, but like, growing up,
the pursuit of American citizens citizenship was like the number
one thing in my family. It was like there are
you know, there are five of us. I luckily was
me and one of my one of my sisters and

(54:01):
I were both born here, so we had it to
begin with. Yeah, and the other three members of our
family were not born here, so there was this like
you know, it was like my dad was close to
getting it, but then he had to return to Greece
to do his mandatory military service. But then the clock
went back to zero of like how long he had
lived here when he came back. And then like my
other my youngest sister had to be here for a

(54:22):
certain amount of time before we moved back to Greece.
Like it is. Citizenship is so genuinely kofka esque and
changes like every the priorities changed with every government in
every five years and depending on who is lobbying who
to get what kind of immigrants in America, And so
the idea of any kind of shortcut is genuinely extremely

(54:42):
alluring because it is so difficult to do it quote
unquote the right, you know, the acceptable way.

Speaker 4 (54:47):
And I would say, like the greatest thing an American
can do is like marry someone to give them a
green Carreri one hundred, Like I'm all for that. I
really like It's like, you know, people are like, well,
welcome to you. Immigrations isn't broke like Mary want Marrian immigrants. Yeah,
but you know it's not that, like you do have
to prove that it's really like and it's like money
and you have to make sure like if you're an
American citizen and you marry someone, they go through all

(55:09):
your taxes and everything. You know, you have to be
like kind of on the ball. So that's kind of
hard for some people my boy friends. No, but it's true,
like it's a stupid system. So I don't feel like
you shouldn't do that, like it's like a terrible system.

Speaker 1 (55:26):
You should Oh my god, no part of me. It's
like when people are accused of like doing fraud to
like get out of work, like pretending they have a
disability or something to get out of work. I'm like, yeah,
you should do that.

Speaker 3 (55:37):
That's good.

Speaker 1 (55:37):
That's good, and more like that's morally good, Like.

Speaker 3 (55:41):
Everyone should pretend to have a disability and get married.

Speaker 2 (55:43):
Yeah, exactly. Well, and marriage is supposed to be a
transaction anyway. I know, like so many people in America
get married for like health insurance. Yes, And it's like
that's the big push to be like okay, well it
would be better for taxes and health insurance, so let's
go for it. Yeah, it's like why not add a
little green card there?

Speaker 1 (56:01):
I guess it's like it's the straightest thing about it
in a sense, is exactly that it's like marriage as
a business proposition, yeah, which is the core of one
of the chore and also then adding on top of
that a layer of performance of like, well we have
to have a photo album proving we're in love.

Speaker 2 (56:19):
Yeah, and we can't say it's a business transaction exactly,
say it's for love.

Speaker 1 (56:23):
So in some sense it's actually emblematic of the larger
institution of straight marriage. Yeah, makes the subtext text.

Speaker 3 (56:30):
That's true, it's true. Yeah, that's what I was going
to say actually.

Speaker 2 (56:37):
Too.

Speaker 5 (56:38):
Yeah weird, Yeah, I was dominating subtext texts actually, And
it's very intrusive to Also, queer couples do obviously get
married and you know, but like and get green cards
true marriage and stuff.

Speaker 4 (56:53):
But like you do have to sometimes they ask you
about your sex life and like you have to who's
the bottom?

Speaker 1 (57:03):
Literally Joe Biden being like, so.

Speaker 2 (57:05):
Who does what? So you're in honor? Are you guys
open play together? Separate? What is it.

Speaker 4 (57:19):
You definitely couldn't. I bet you couldn't say you're in
an open marriage. Oh I'm sure not if you were
doing your interview.

Speaker 1 (57:24):
No, you have to be Christian and Republican.

Speaker 3 (57:26):
Yeah, yeah, and it did come.

Speaker 4 (57:29):
I could be wrong, but I think the k one
that visa was because of like soldiers you know, abroad
who were like, I want to bring this girl back,
you know, from maybe Korea.

Speaker 3 (57:40):
Vietnam, I don't know, totally totally, Yeah.

Speaker 4 (57:42):
Yeah, I think that's or maybe even World War two,
because there's like Americans all over the world bringing back women.

Speaker 3 (57:50):
God, so jealous are.

Speaker 1 (57:52):
It will take truly like generations to undo the damage
of heteroistic reality. It's crazy to be like, yeah, there's
a rich tradition of men bringing women back, and it's
like whoa, wha, wha, whoa yeah wait what.

Speaker 4 (58:09):
And the government was like, oh, we have to organize this, Yeah,
we have to organize.

Speaker 1 (58:12):
Well, the men want it.

Speaker 2 (58:14):
Yeah yeah, yeah, it's law.

Speaker 4 (58:16):
But it's just really confusing too because they first, like
a lot of the like the anti like the Chinese
Exclusion Act was a lot of that was like fake
supposedly to like stop sex work.

Speaker 3 (58:30):
So it's like, well, what do you want? Then what
you're saying like, we're not bringing anyone because they're sex workers.
Not true.

Speaker 4 (58:37):
But then they're like, oh, we'll allow you to bring
in like the women that you want to have sex with.

Speaker 2 (58:43):
Right.

Speaker 1 (58:44):
It seems like it's sort of like the two things
taken into account or what a man wants and how
what a man needs, what a man wants, what a
man needs, and is it in the Bible and if
it passes those three tests, yeah, I gotta take out
a babe.

Speaker 2 (59:00):
Whoever, whoever, just keep it quiet.

Speaker 1 (59:05):
I feel like green card marriages are such a trope
in TV and film. Yeah, like The Proposal and like
Unwill and Grace famously, Tay Diggs played a guy Will
was into, but he was Canadian, and so Grace offered
to marry him. Oh I didn't know that, just to
like bring him.

Speaker 2 (59:25):
I think I saw one of these upsides. Yeah, I
mean it's a very sitcom.

Speaker 1 (59:29):
The ninety day thing is very it's very sitcom.

Speaker 2 (59:32):
Yeah, and having to prove your love to like a
government officials like inherently comedic. And it's like, so I
get it. I get why you would run to it.

Speaker 1 (59:40):
For of course.

Speaker 4 (59:41):
I mean they also have they have all these spinoff
shows to call like ninety Day the other way, so
where like the American goes abroad, And that's incredible because
often so like the majority of those visas are for
a Philippine ad women and then so like the men
American men like go to the Philippines and they just
don't have clue like.

Speaker 3 (01:00:00):
What's going on.

Speaker 4 (01:00:01):
And they're from you know, like rural America somewhere, and
they've never traveled round anything. And then they just like
go to the Philippines and then they're just like out
of their minds.

Speaker 2 (01:00:10):
Wow. Well that sounds a little more playful.

Speaker 3 (01:00:13):
That's fun to watch. That wouldn't make you too sad,
I don't think.

Speaker 1 (01:00:16):
Yeah, what you know. In the words of Mi i
a borers, what's up with that?

Speaker 3 (01:00:24):
And her paper planes? You know paper planes or visas?

Speaker 1 (01:00:27):
Oh my god, that's right. Yeah, but also borders, what's
up with that? One of the most important statements ever
said in music.

Speaker 2 (01:00:33):
When she said the politics change.

Speaker 1 (01:00:35):
Wait, actually, I just want to be candid. I did
not know paper planes were visas, and I pretended I did,
And now I want you to explain. So it's so
paper planes, So that song is also about borders obviously.

Speaker 2 (01:00:46):
Well yeah, it's like, well, not that obvious. We both
didn't know.

Speaker 1 (01:00:48):
Wait, hold on, hold on, all I want to do? Okay, Well, yeah,
what's the Well I think maybe let's not look too
much into it because I think it's.

Speaker 3 (01:00:58):
Not imagine if I just made it up. I'm just
sweating sitting here. I don't think about it too.

Speaker 4 (01:01:04):
I think, yeah, paper planes, are they like you to travel? Yes, yeah,
that's true.

Speaker 3 (01:01:09):
But wait, you were gonna say borders. What's up with that?

Speaker 2 (01:01:12):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (01:01:12):
Is that what you're actually thinking?

Speaker 2 (01:01:14):
Literally?

Speaker 3 (01:01:14):
Yeah, I don't know.

Speaker 2 (01:01:17):
I know it's insane, but to another country, and it's like,
why is this so difficult? Like I'm like, shouldn't we
just like hop off the plane and get in a car?

Speaker 1 (01:01:24):
I know? And it's also like, just okay, well, I
guess it comes down to I understand the point of
my political beliefs aside, I understand theoretically the point of borders.
I'm not like, I'm not like why I understand this
is the fact that in sports, team exactly, yes, like
countries need different flags and they need anthems to be
perform at the Olympics. Yeah, and there also needs to

(01:01:46):
be like the best international feature.

Speaker 2 (01:01:47):
Word of the Oscars. It's pretty simple.

Speaker 1 (01:01:50):
Yeah, but the idea that like a foreigner is inherently
more evil than someone living in your country is truly
so arbitrary when you think about how many evil people
exist in every country.

Speaker 3 (01:02:05):
Yeah, and also how they just change all the time.

Speaker 4 (01:02:09):
Yes, Like the Philippines was like a US colony basically
for a while, so like why are they acting now, like, oh,
you need a special like you know, obviously, like Mexican
America took part in Mexico. Like it's so they're so
fluid or itis are but not for only if you're powerful,
you know.

Speaker 3 (01:02:29):
But I don't know. I don't know about the like
the visa. Still I do like your what you said
about like the women who come over is like their
destiny too, and they're like I'm doing this, like I'm
getting this, and.

Speaker 1 (01:02:44):
There's definitely do whatever I want exactly, you know. And
it's like and in many ways they have more power
than the main I mean, I understand that the man
has the citizenship, which is what is at stake, Yeah.

Speaker 3 (01:02:55):
But the men are it's so funny what they believe
about themselves though.

Speaker 2 (01:02:59):
This straight guys, I think they're not desperate.

Speaker 4 (01:03:02):
Yeah yeah, and they think that she loves them. Oh,
I fully think often that just she she just loves them,
you know. And it's like so nice because like no
American woman loved him, and now here's this woman who's
like beautiful and young and she just loves him, she
wants to live with him, and they're totally I think
they do believe it.

Speaker 2 (01:03:21):
I'm trying to find a positive trying to only read
it as like.

Speaker 3 (01:03:25):
Good, yeah, she does love it.

Speaker 2 (01:03:29):
Nice sisters are doing it for the film. That's really nice.
I know of only one gay version of like in
like a personal life.

Speaker 1 (01:03:40):
I gotta say, my instinct when you said that the
other day was like I also know gay versions, but
now I can't think of any of them because I'm like,
I'm sure I know. I think that I think I
know a few, like Canada US oh yeahs, which I
think is like it's sort of like everything we're talking
about with that, any of the politics, yeah, sort of

(01:04:02):
like well it's Canadian.

Speaker 4 (01:04:03):
Yeah yeah, yeah, because because it's for Canadians, there's like
tons of undocumented Canadians.

Speaker 2 (01:04:09):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (01:04:10):
America and then it's only when you kind of get
into it, I guess, go back to where you came from.

Speaker 2 (01:04:23):
Yeah, yeah, the one I know. I literally think it's
like the gay guys American, but then I think the
man he married is like actually straight. Whoa.

Speaker 1 (01:04:33):
Oh, so it's literally like a green card marriage.

Speaker 2 (01:04:35):
Yeah, and it's like, literally, do you.

Speaker 3 (01:04:37):
Think any money change tons?

Speaker 2 (01:04:40):
I think actually it's possible. But it's like a juicy one.
And it also sounded like hot, Like I was like, oh,
you guys like pretend to be in a couple. Sometimes
with the governments, of course you think it's hot, Like
the husband has a girlfriend.

Speaker 1 (01:04:53):
I cannot believe you. There is nothing you won't turn
into like a fetish.

Speaker 2 (01:05:00):
It's just a lot government official comes down and you
guys have to like sleep in the same bed.

Speaker 1 (01:05:08):
They like turn on the TV and they've like planned it,
so it's a sex tape of them, like, oh, sorry,
didn't me for you to see that, but that's just
what we do all.

Speaker 4 (01:05:14):
Night and do like the idea of them putting together
photo albums, So you need to go like maybe higher
a photographer and like go through different seasons and everything,
you know, like different costumes You and the Sky.

Speaker 1 (01:05:27):
Yeah, yeah, well that's a classic sitcom thing.

Speaker 3 (01:05:29):
I feel like that.

Speaker 1 (01:05:31):
I feel like I've seen that montage of.

Speaker 4 (01:05:34):
Yeah, there was a Gerrard depper Dove film. Oh I'm
saying his name wrong, I'm sure, but like and it
was called Green Cards, and I think that, like, you know,
they really did fall in love, like they like.

Speaker 3 (01:05:44):
It was arranged and then they really did fall in love.

Speaker 4 (01:05:47):
But like, if you are doing a big trick together,
like if you are doing a big like putting the
ball over the government size and stuff, then that is
like that does bond.

Speaker 2 (01:05:54):
Yeah, yeah, and probably if.

Speaker 3 (01:05:56):
You're doing trust each other a lot.

Speaker 1 (01:05:58):
I mean, you don't want to risk being in another
relationsip ship and having that found out, so probably you'll
be single that entire time.

Speaker 3 (01:06:03):
Yeah, yeah, you are doing.

Speaker 1 (01:06:05):
You are you have a common secret? Yeah, it's something
that bonds you mm hmmm.

Speaker 4 (01:06:09):
A lot of paperwork together, a lot of paperwork, you know,
your heads together over the paper.

Speaker 1 (01:06:13):
Yeah, and then after handlight Yeah, after two years you're like, well,
what I want to do? You start from scratch? Like, yeah,
at this point I know this person probably better than
I would a random person. I went on a few
dates with Yeah, that is.

Speaker 3 (01:06:25):
The American definitely. No, Yeah, stay with them.

Speaker 2 (01:06:28):
Let's make it work. It's been two years.

Speaker 1 (01:06:30):
Wow?

Speaker 2 (01:06:40):
Should we in our final segment?

Speaker 1 (01:06:42):
I think so. Any final thoughts on No, I just.

Speaker 3 (01:06:45):
Want to really apologize for bringing you both down. And yeah,
I think making.

Speaker 2 (01:06:52):
Apologize to the listeners.

Speaker 4 (01:06:54):
I'm sorry rolling in, I'm sorry. But a nice way
obviously to lift everyone's to be a little proposal.

Speaker 1 (01:07:02):
Oh my god, who's gonna propose?

Speaker 2 (01:07:03):
Oh my god?

Speaker 1 (01:07:04):
Do you want us to propose to No?

Speaker 3 (01:07:06):
No, I don't know. Are you I don't have a
green card.

Speaker 2 (01:07:09):
You don't have a green so in some senses you're single.

Speaker 1 (01:07:12):
Here's wait, I have a question. Are you You don't
have to answer this if you don't. Are you single?

Speaker 3 (01:07:18):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (01:07:18):
Okay, well I would like to say that if.

Speaker 2 (01:07:24):
I do.

Speaker 1 (01:07:28):
What I was gonna say is because I'm not Seriously,
I'm like, I'm like, if any listeners want to propose
to mave.

Speaker 2 (01:07:38):
Slide slide into the DM.

Speaker 3 (01:07:43):
I have had friends offer.

Speaker 4 (01:07:44):
I mean, I just don't need it, like you know,
as in like I have a really good visa and everything.
But I have had friends like offer. Definitely, But and
if I was stuck.

Speaker 1 (01:07:56):
I totally you've considered it.

Speaker 2 (01:07:58):
Yeah, yeah, you Mary Randa, then go back and join
the Celtic Revival and say say goodbye to Sweet Green forever.

Speaker 3 (01:08:10):
You can be in the Celtic Revival.

Speaker 2 (01:08:12):
I would love to.

Speaker 1 (01:08:13):
Yeah, I would love to be in the Celtic Arrival.
I would actually love to be in Bad Sister season two.

Speaker 2 (01:08:17):
I actually would thrive as like the American in like
a show.

Speaker 3 (01:08:21):
Yeah, you're walking.

Speaker 2 (01:08:24):
And I'd be like, I don't know why I'm here.

Speaker 1 (01:08:28):
Sharon Horgan to me is like true mother. I love
I really love her. And one time, years ago, one time,
years ago, someone told me that she someone on her
team quote unquote told me she had read something I
had written. And I I suspect he was lying. I
suspect it was like she loved.

Speaker 2 (01:08:47):
It everyone in this town.

Speaker 1 (01:08:49):
Yeah, but to this day I have chosen to believe it.
I'm like, she's just waiting for the right time to
get it.

Speaker 3 (01:08:55):
I'm sure true, Yeah, I'm sure.

Speaker 1 (01:08:57):
I mean this was like six years ago.

Speaker 2 (01:08:59):
Yeah, she was reading a lot back.

Speaker 1 (01:09:00):
Maybe she's gonna call me after this episode and then she's,
oh my god, I had forgotten about that. Yes, we'd
love to make it.

Speaker 4 (01:09:08):
God, you know, I went to like a talk that
she did years ago when I was living in Ireland
but pre revival and.

Speaker 2 (01:09:15):
Sad I was like the last of us, I've got
to go.

Speaker 3 (01:09:20):
I fell there in twenty ten and.

Speaker 4 (01:09:23):
She was doing you know, like a screenwriter's talk organized
by like I can't remember who, but like it was
that the writer's thing is center and.

Speaker 3 (01:09:31):
There was only women in the audience.

Speaker 4 (01:09:32):
Wow, you know, it's like only women can go and
see a woman talk. And there's like more male screenwriters
in Ireland than there are female ones. But like Sharon
Horgan was talking and she's like a genius obviously literally
the most Now this was before, but it was after
pulling it, Like you know, she was like up there
already and clearly so funny and great. But anyway, that's

(01:09:54):
like not my resounding memory of her, but sometimes I
kind of kneedle on that one.

Speaker 3 (01:09:59):
Think about it there.

Speaker 4 (01:10:00):
I know, it's nuts they could have like listened to
ten years ago like I did.

Speaker 3 (01:10:05):
Look at me now.

Speaker 2 (01:10:07):
It helped so much.

Speaker 1 (01:10:08):
It's crazy that you can even be Sharon Horgan and
people will still not.

Speaker 2 (01:10:12):
Listen to you, I know, because you're a woman.

Speaker 1 (01:10:14):
It's like, what more can you do?

Speaker 2 (01:10:16):
You're Sharon Organ?

Speaker 3 (01:10:18):
No more, no more listening to her now and I'm engaged.

Speaker 2 (01:10:26):
Wait.

Speaker 1 (01:10:26):
Okay, my mic idea for Sharon Horgan's next show that
will combine green Card marriages and the Celtic Revival. It's
literally starting you and you're in You're in a green
card marriage with who's a hot.

Speaker 2 (01:10:42):
Who has a mole, is American and can play straight
really well no mole far Oh my god.

Speaker 1 (01:10:56):
I would love it if it was starring in a
green part Sharon Horrigan show on Apple.

Speaker 4 (01:11:02):
Yeah, yeah, I me, and would have to be in
the two as she just would be his mom.

Speaker 1 (01:11:07):
Yes, that's right. It's like her big comic is just
like a light comedy. She's like arown man, who's this girl?

Speaker 2 (01:11:16):
She plays himself? Yeah, he plays himself.

Speaker 3 (01:11:18):
He plays himself. She plays herself.

Speaker 2 (01:11:20):
Yes, you play yourself and you play yourself. It's a
reality show.

Speaker 1 (01:11:23):
And by the way, words ideas, and you're doing a
podcast in part of it.

Speaker 3 (01:11:27):
Wow, say you're fick.

Speaker 2 (01:11:31):
Oh that's to our final segment. Okay, well you introduced
to this.

Speaker 1 (01:11:35):
Yes, there was not there will be nothing. I want
more in my life. So I'm just thinking of what
men want, what men need, and is it in the Bible.
My iconic joke from earlier that everyone loved that was
Okay may. Our final segment is called shout Outs, and

(01:11:55):
in this segment we pay homage to a classic straight
artistic tradition, the radio shout out. I think you know
MTV's TRL. Think you're calling into a radio show and
shouting out your squad back home. We want to shout
out something that we that we've been loving lately and
that we want to give a shout out to. And
guess what I don't have one?

Speaker 2 (01:12:15):
Guess what I have? One? Whoa?

Speaker 1 (01:12:16):
Yeah, okay, go off?

Speaker 2 (01:12:18):
What's up? Freaks? Losing perverts say, I'm here. I just
want to give a huge shout out to spring lighting.
I feel the sun has changed in the last week
and it is completely different now. And yes, it's still
cold when we're recording this. It is early early March,
but the lighting is different and it is like I
feel when I'm looking out a window, like, oh, I

(01:12:40):
bet it's warm outside, and that even just thinking that
for a moment does wonders for my mood. I feel
on top of the world. I feel like like, I'm
actually remembering the version of myself from last spring and
last summer that was smarter, funnier, more well adjusted, more
well read. And I can see that version of me

(01:13:00):
coming back and he is ready to solve the So
shout out to spring Lighting. I see you and I
feel warm.

Speaker 1 (01:13:12):
What's up listeners out there in all countries, there are
no borders on this podcast. I want to give a
shout out to the linen lobby for convincing me for
the past thirty years that I want a linen suit,
despite the fact that every time I try one on
it looks like fucking shit. Hey, look it is off, wrinkly,
Oh wait, the facts weirdly, you think it's going to

(01:13:33):
be good for warm weather, but it's still a suit.
You might as well just wear a normal suit. And
you think you're gonna look good in a lighter color,
but guess what suits are meant to be dark folks.
And guess what Despite all of that, despite the fact
that I recently tried on the linen suit and it
went into my butt in a way I have not
seen any pants go into my butt before, I am

(01:13:53):
after this recording going and trying on another linen suit
because I can't get over the fact that I need
one for summer weddings this year and I'm going to
one in a month, and I need to wear linen
suit because the invite said linen suits are okay, and
I checked that as an order, and guess what. None
of them are gonna look good. But I am gonna
overpay for them, and then I'm gonna wear them and
not post the picks.

Speaker 2 (01:14:11):
I'm gonna look bad. Woo. This is really smart. Actually,
I think linen suits are only meant for like film sets,
because it always a steamer off, like just off cam,
like they always look good in movies and TV shows
and in ads, and then it's like but then you
sit down once and it's like a wrinkly mess. It's truly.

Speaker 1 (01:14:32):
I mean I feel this way about linen sheets too,
which I should have mentioned the shout outs and goes
back to linen lody. I'm like, what is the deal
with linen? Why are we still pretending? And yet and yet,
like I said, I'm not joking that I'm going to
go try on another.

Speaker 2 (01:14:45):
Suit after this? Where are you going? J Crow Classic and.

Speaker 3 (01:14:48):
The baggy they bag out at the knees. Yes, yeah,
they're just yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:14:53):
Also, I have to say not to get too real
about a body image on this podcast, but as someone
who struggles with body, suits are actually really uh something
I love wearing because they are structured in a way that, like,
no matter what your body type is as a gentleman,
it makes you just sort of look like a candle
because of the shoulder pads and because of the way

(01:15:14):
it's and linen. Suits are unstructured, so you also don't
feel as hot as you would and wearing a normal suit,
it's just sort of like, this is your body type
and we're putting a thing on.

Speaker 3 (01:15:23):
It, we're draping us.

Speaker 2 (01:15:24):
And yet I really hope it fits. What when I go,
I bet it will, I bet it's okay? Maybe when
you are ready?

Speaker 1 (01:15:33):
Oh oh my god, she's ready.

Speaker 3 (01:15:35):
Yeah, okay.

Speaker 4 (01:15:37):
Shout out because I never did want of these, so
I wrote down shout out to all my curly haired
women with glasses working in wool shops aka yarn stores
all around the world. I know you're shy girls. All
you care about is the fabric air community. But guess
what I care about too, Watching you light up when
I ask you about kitchens. It makes me believe the
world's gonna be okay, and and maybe a stitch in

(01:16:01):
time really will save nine. I love you as much
as you love knitting. And how can you even million
excuse me, how could you even measure that it's an
Infinity scarf and your both ends?

Speaker 3 (01:16:11):
Baby?

Speaker 2 (01:16:13):
Yeah, that was incredible and it was great tie into
your product line.

Speaker 3 (01:16:18):
I know.

Speaker 1 (01:16:19):
Wait, I can't believe I ran out of time and
didn't talk about your product line.

Speaker 3 (01:16:23):
Yeah, I don't have this. This is just for me.

Speaker 2 (01:16:27):
So it's just one piece.

Speaker 3 (01:16:28):
It's just one Yeah, you could charge millions and it
smells like bed bath and beyond that cherry face.

Speaker 1 (01:16:36):
Color palette is like so sophisticated.

Speaker 3 (01:16:39):
Oh thank you so much.

Speaker 1 (01:16:40):
It really is. It's like those close together can only
you have to be talented to like make it work.
Like they couldn't sell that at J Crew.

Speaker 4 (01:16:49):
No, No, it took her long time. It's four strands
of more hair held together, so it did take me ages.
And in fact, it's so funny because I absolutely hate
it when I made it and I tried it on,
and it took me so long, and I was nearly
going to give it to charity. And then I thought, no,
it's too crap for the charity shop because there's a
few mistakes. I don't know if you can see them
like this.

Speaker 2 (01:17:08):
Well, we love imperfections.

Speaker 1 (01:17:09):
Yeah, it's like a mole for your clothes.

Speaker 2 (01:17:15):
Wow. Well, thank god this is a visual podcast now.

Speaker 1 (01:17:18):
I know truly. I was like, we have to get
a photo, but then I remembered it's going to be
on YouTube. There's going to be a photo video video.

Speaker 2 (01:17:25):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (01:17:25):
Well, I'm thrilled to be here for your very first
YouTube podcasts.

Speaker 1 (01:17:29):
It's an honor to have you.

Speaker 2 (01:17:30):
Yeah, thanks so much for doing it.

Speaker 1 (01:17:31):
A delight, what a delight.

Speaker 2 (01:17:33):
Well bye,

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