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November 27, 2024 12 mins

Welcome to Unbreakable! A mental wealth podcast hosted by Fox NFL Insider Jay Glazer. Holidays can be REALLLLLLY hard for a lot of us. So on today’s episode, Jay dishes out a full serving of tips and insight into things you can do to help deal with things that may trigger you, loneliness, family… whatever may make the holiday a struggle. Ways to Be Of Service, Lean Into Your Teammates, Stick With Your Rituals, FORGIVE yourself and give yourself grace IMMEDIATELY if you are triggered, don’t let the little kid inside feel beaten down, and more.

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Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
This is Unbreakable with Jay Glacier, a mental Wealth podcast
Build you from the inside out.

Speaker 2 (00:11):
Now here's Jay Glacier.

Speaker 1 (00:14):
Welcome into Unbreakable, a mental Wealth podcast with Jay Glazer.
I'm Jay Glazer. It's a special holiday edition. So the
guests today are you and me. What I want to
do here is I know the holidays.

Speaker 2 (00:27):
Are hard for a lot of us, and I.

Speaker 1 (00:30):
Always wanted looking back now, I wish the guy i'm
now could help the guy was back then to get
through some of these holidays. Holidays are difficult for a
lot of us. A lot of times them with family
is hard. A lot of times loneliness is hard.

Speaker 2 (00:44):
It hits us hard. So what I want to try
and do today is see.

Speaker 1 (00:47):
Where I can help, See if I can coach, See
if I can maybe inspire people to make these holidays
a little bit easier for all of us.

Speaker 2 (00:55):
And some of the things that have kind of helped
me along the way.

Speaker 1 (00:57):
So, first of all, one of the things that we
could really do for people who and I'll get into
people who could be triggered in a second, but there's
holidays where I didn't go anywhere else or I had
to work, and you know, that kind of that loneliness
on those holidays gets to Even though I knew I
was working, it still kind of got to me, and

(01:19):
the loneliness was really hard. So what I try to
do on those years is I decide I'm going to
go be of service and I would go feed the
homeless during Thanksgiving. I would go to shelters to help
during Thanksgiving in the past. Also, I've got a military
basis and that was through Fox. But my point is,
if you're of service, it really takes away And this

(01:42):
is a big goal of mine in dealing with the
great dealing with your depression and anxiety. When we're of service,
it cuts through that gray and it gets us to
see the blue. Well, no better time for you to
be of service than the holidays and say it on yourself.
You know, I'm going to actually celebrate, celebrate myself by
being of service helping others.

Speaker 2 (02:00):
It could be an animal shelter, whatever it is, figure
it out.

Speaker 1 (02:03):
When I was really broke in New York City, you know,
I had a bartend on the holidays and there was
a Barcoe let's make a dacorate at the South Street Seaport.
I would then go get food and I would go
out and hand them to the homeless, and I'd be like,
I'm gonna have Thanksgiving with them. How as that sounds
some of the best Thanksgivings I've had, people.

Speaker 2 (02:23):
Will really appreciate that.

Speaker 1 (02:26):
And again, when you were of service, it's really hard
to tell you bad things about yourself. So right now
on holiday times, we tend to beat up on ourselves
a lot if we are alone or when your service.
The roommates in your head don't get that voice. The
roommates in your head don't get to set the narrative.

(02:46):
So I can't tell you enough how important that is.
And by the way, even if you do have somewhere
to go, figure out a place, something some way, you
could still be of service because you have that in
your back pocket. No matter what, it really helps us
during the holidays. Number two, lean into your teammates. You
hear me say this all the time. And what I

(03:07):
mean by this is, even before you're gonna go where
you're gonna go.

Speaker 2 (03:11):
Call your boys, call your home girls.

Speaker 1 (03:13):
Call your sisters, your brothers, call your people and say, listen,
this may be a hard one for me.

Speaker 2 (03:20):
Are you gonna be available? Can I talk to you
if they are. If I need to take a step away,
can I holler?

Speaker 1 (03:26):
Because a lot of times too somebody will say absolutely
and they needed it also, So lean into your teammates,
really lean in. Also, like I'm saying, at a time
like this, going into it, if you know that you're
gonna go, let's see family and it's gonna trigger you,
talk to your crew about it. Talk to your crew
about it going in, get ideas from them. How could

(03:46):
I better handle this? How could I better not get
beat up? How can I prevent myself from from going
down these rabbit holes? So have these talks immediately, Immediately
call your crew, lean into your teammates a look in.
When I'm really struggling, I call two people used to
be for but two people to tell them I'm struggling,

(04:08):
and then two people to not tell him I'm struggling,
just to check up on them, because that's being of service.
So it's another thing, right, if you're having difficulties the holidays,
just call some of your teammates, check up on them,
see how they're doing. It's another way for you to
be of service. But it's keeping you connected to your teammates,
and that's protecting your own sanity. It's building your own

(04:30):
fortress about what can keep you happy and keep you safe.
The whole point is we got to keep ourselves safe here.
Number three, Stay in your rituals. I now I have
all these rituals, breath work, meditation, gratitude list, working out.
I do a cold plunk that Michael Phelps, my brother
sent me called Chili Goat little plug there for him.

Speaker 2 (04:50):
We do.

Speaker 1 (04:51):
I say these prayers with Rosy and myself. But I
have these rituals that I now do religiously. I do
this whole thing for my hips. My hips up every
day kind of help me. I do this stretching routine,
I do uh again, breath work, I do that a
couple times a day. Stay in your routine so when
you go somewhere and you know it's going to trigger

(05:12):
you again, you want you want your rituals and your
your schedule to be as structured as possible. So don't
let yourself get thrown off course, thrown off base by
being somewhere else. It's such an important thing because we
tend to go somewhere else and you put it on hold.
It's your support system. Don't get rid of your support system.

(05:35):
When you need your support the most, make sure, no
matter what, you prioritize what your rituals have become.

Speaker 2 (05:44):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (05:45):
Another thing here, A lot of times when we get triggered, okay,
we feel like that helpless little kid again, that's hard, okay,
and I feel like that helpless are beaten down little kid.

Speaker 2 (05:58):
So a couple of things.

Speaker 1 (06:00):
Number One, if you are triggered, first and foremost, immediately
forgive yourself.

Speaker 2 (06:06):
Immediately.

Speaker 1 (06:08):
Just go to that next room, Go in that next room,
forgive yourself. But the other thing I want you to
do is go in the next room and love that
little kid up.

Speaker 2 (06:18):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (06:19):
So I learned this from these monks in Thailand. And
these monks said to me, Hey, we want you to
want you to come to do the month thing. We
want you to not talk to anybody, and we want
you to for three days. I'm not talking anybody for
three days a month. I got ADHD, what are we
talking about here? And they said, I want you to
do and what you call yourself growing up was a jay?

(06:40):
I said that was Jason. Okay, we want you to
I'll talk to anybody, and we want you to just
meditate and picture little Jason and hold his hand, put
your arm around him, tell him you got him, it's
gonna be okay, And show him some compassion because he

(07:00):
probably doesn't feel like he's had enough or at any
Love that little kid up.

Speaker 2 (07:06):
It changed my life. A lot of the issues I've
had has been that triggered little kid, that beating down
little kid. Not I wouldn't phasily beat down my.

Speaker 1 (07:15):
Parents or anything, but man, I was a runt to
the litter. I was tiny grown up. It was rough
in the Jersey Shore. When you're so tiny. Man, I
wrestled one hundred and one pounds in high schools on
one on one pattern. He got shuw. Man, it was rough.
I built myself up in a Jay Glazer. Who I
am now? Because how were ugh? That was? But love
that little kid up. And like I said, to this day,

(07:38):
when I have these little outbursts, I realize it's him,
the little kid who's screaming out for help, feels like
he did.

Speaker 2 (07:44):
Something wrong, feels like he deserves to be punished.

Speaker 1 (07:48):
To show that little kid compassion, literally go to the
next room forgive yourself you get triggered, and love that
little queed up. And recently I haven't had an issue.
I had an issue in sparring I was having Like
he's little, I wasn't myself. And I went to Greg
Harden May rest apple in Peace, who was the mental
performance coach for Tom Brady and Michael Phelps and Charles

(08:11):
Woods and these guys. He's like Jay that for some
reason that scared little kids coming out of us. Like Greg,
I been Sparn've been fighting for years, man. I started
wrestling in nineteen eighty two and boxing an eighty eight
and MMA in two thousand and what do you mean
He said, there's something going on with that little kid. Well,
he's horrifying right now, and you had to let him
know he's safe and comfort him.

Speaker 2 (08:34):
And started talking to my therapist about it. And I
got to the bottom of it.

Speaker 1 (08:38):
And now I got his back and make sure I
get that little kids back. So and those kinds made
it sound a little foreigner people. That was a lot
for me. Like that scared little kid. He became the
dominant voice instead of Jay Glazer Warrior, Jay Glazer being
that dominant voice, and I couldn't shut him up because
you don't want to shut that kid up.

Speaker 2 (08:59):
You got to comfort him. So now we're at the holidays,
we get triggered. A lot of times.

Speaker 1 (09:03):
It's that same kid and you may have a hard
time with parents or brothers and sisters, or you know,
just your hometown, whatever it is, but you become that
scared little kid again.

Speaker 2 (09:15):
So make sure that you practice I got you, I
got you.

Speaker 1 (09:20):
Love that kid up, love him or her up, Hug them,
hold their hands. Another great thing for your game is
I'm doing this podcast because there's an awful lot of you, well,
awful lot of us, and felt this way on holidays.
So when you think about it way, I'm in the
majority today, I'm not alone. I'm far from alone. Man,

(09:42):
I'm not alone at all. There are so many other
people who are going through it right now. So realizing
you're probably in the majority, so we're not alone. If
you get triggered, you're gonna get triggered. It's okay, don't
beat up on yourself. We're gonna forgive ourselves right then,
we're gonna do another room. We're gonna love that little
kid up, comfort that little kid, and also know that
little kid's most important. Okay, your mom, your dad, your brother,

(10:05):
your sister, your friends, your hometown, people, whatever, they're not
most important. That little kid is. I cannot stress this enough.
That little kid is. You are most important. Give yourself
some grace forgive yourself. Realize also, hey, this isn't gonna
be forever. It's a couple of days here. Staying your rituals,
be of service, whether it's calling others or actually going

(10:27):
and doing something people who are in need. On Thanksgiving,
for the holidays here, lean into your teammates. Make sure
you're there for them and they're there for you. Lean
into them going into it, be proactive about it, and
make sure that you're being good there as well, and
you're leaning into them also at that point, and make

(10:49):
sure that no matter what happens on these holidays, you
do know that you are loved. May not feel it
where you are, where you are, we all got teammates.
The teammate of mim My Dog's teammates, Rosie's a teammate,
even though I didn't have her until you know, four
years ago. There are teammates everywhere, right, You just got
to see it and make sure you know you are

(11:11):
not alone. And you know, finally, like I said, love
that little kid up, but also love the adult you up.

Speaker 2 (11:18):
As well.

Speaker 1 (11:20):
Man, if you get thrown off kilter or give yourself,
get yourself back on track.

Speaker 2 (11:25):
It's never too late to start over.

Speaker 1 (11:26):
Even if you make a big mistake and you have
an outburst or something along those lines.

Speaker 2 (11:30):
If you have a milktown, just restart again. It's okay, start.

Speaker 1 (11:35):
From square one. We're good with that. Yeah, there's no
shame in that. The great part is as long as
you just keep moving forward. If you fall down, get
back up, brush yourself off. Let's all keep walking this
walk together.

Speaker 2 (11:48):
Love y'all.

Speaker 1 (11:49):
Happy holidays, and I am grateful and thankful for all
of you. You guys have given me my purpose. You
guys have all given me my why. Never knew that
my pain would lead to helping others through theirs, So
I am so incredibly thankful for all of you during
these ties.

Speaker 2 (12:08):
Love y'all,
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