February 8, 2022 • 40 mins
On this episode, we hear from a caller who is squeamish about his shoulder, a woman who wants to give her lover’s face an extreme makeover, and a man who can’t cream without a scream.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Make sure to subscribe, rate, and review The Doctor Sex
re Show wherever you listen to your favorite podcasts. On
today's episode of The Doctor Sex Reese Show, we talked
to a caller who's squeamish about his shoulder, a woman
with a wild request for her lover, and a man
(00:21):
who can't cream without a scream. And now The Doctor
Sex Reese Show with your host, Dr Robert sex Reese.
This is the Doctor Robert sex re Show. I'm Dr
Robert sex Reese. How can I help you today? Every
caller that calls me, I take as it's me or them.
(00:45):
I don't like that either, honestly, now that I'm hearing
it come from you, very excited to talk about this,
Can you give me a second? I'm choking on a walnut.
You know you're on the air. Can we just put
aside our differences and agree that I was right, very
impatient to hear your question, but also living in fear
of it. I'm rowing gems at you and you just
keep dropping them in the river. My situation is, I'm
doing what I love. I'm free from human touch, and
(01:07):
I'm here to give what I have to you. Hello, Hello, Helloha,
and Welcome to the Doctors Sex Reese Show. Today's topic
is scars. Now, for years, I've been trying everything I
can to keep people away from sex, because you know,
people get hurt, and sometimes that hurt can lead to scars.
(01:32):
But it's not just from the lashes of a poorly
handled cat of nine tails or from having every muscle
in your body go into a Charlie Horse causing you
to collapse into your stained glass coffee table. There's mental
scars as well. There's emotional scars, and even relationships can
be scarred. And actually it's kind of weird that this
(01:53):
topic came up today. I originally thought we were going
to talk about state parks, not having sex in them, no,
but the general appreciation of state parks and how they
can turn you on mentally and emotionally. But our new
producer Shelley, Hello Shelly, and for me that the topic
of parks is too politically charged at the moment, which
(02:14):
is a complete surprise to me because I rarely follow
the news. But apparently it's a part is an issue,
and since I am a coward, I refuse to talk
about politics. So instead today we're covering scars, which is
doubly odd and suspect because I just heard back from
my doctor, which I'm revealing here for the first time ever,
that I do indeed have a scar on my perennium,
(02:38):
which is what you goblins might call a taint. And
I was not aware of this scar because I do
not ever look at my body below the belly button,
and I honestly either pass out or go into a
fugue state during routine physical exams. So this is all
new to me, and it's a lot to process. So
it turns out that one of Jeff F's lies might
have a little bit of truth to it. But that's
(02:59):
how you know it's a lie. Now, did Chili choose
this topic because she already knew about the scar on
my perennium? Is she in cahoots with my doctor? Is
everyone in cahoots against me? I don't know all of
that aside. I'm here to help you, and I want
(03:20):
to help you with your own scars. So let's open
the lines to our callers. We're gonna talk about scars
today on the Doctor Sex Reese Show. Our first caller
is Dave Hidr Reese. Um, here's my question, I have, Um,
I have a scar that I am very self conscious about,
(03:41):
and when my boyfriend and I have sex, uh, he
likes to touch it. His ring finger kind of fits
right into the low divid that it is, and he
just kind of likes to do it. I also don't
like it because it's it brings up bad feelings and
I'm self conscious and it's I've had memories and feelings
(04:02):
associated with it, and I want him to stop. But
I you know, but also sex is very you know,
otherwise good, and it's and it's we're intimate and connected
and I don't want to take him out of the moment.
Have you guys tried not having sex at all? Right now?
I like having We both like having sex. So no, honestly,
(04:23):
why this is something I've been wanting to ask people
for a long time and I never got a straight
answer here. Yeah, it's just it's it's a feeling of
oneness with the universe when you have an organstic. But but
but the rest of it is also everything around it
is is something that I find very pleasurable. It's it's um,
it's a way to get more intimate with your partner.
It's um, you feel like you're sort of physically in
(04:43):
a bubble where no one else exists. That that would
be nice. I would love to be in a bubble
where no one else exists, but also no one else
is touching me. Because when you're a public figure like
I am, and you go out in public and you
recognize which I surprisingly am recognized quite a bit. Um, Yeah,
I think I would. I would be able to pick
(05:05):
you out of it. Yeah. People sometimes will hear my
my my voice and recognized me able to just sort
of sense I'm around generally where people want to touch me,
as well as on busses, and I don't like it,
and yes, it is, it is true, um, And I
ride a lot of busses, And there's a reason why,
because I like buses. I've always liked busses. Something deeper
(05:27):
than that. No, I just didn't want people to think
it was because I was poor or anything like that.
It's because I enjoy the experience of riding a bus.
And but I hate people and I don't like being
close to people. So I would love to find some
sort of portable bubble that would keep people away from
me while also being able to see what's happening around
(05:48):
me at all times. Because I don't also trust people.
This isn't that important, Dave. It's just something that I've
been thinking about. And a lot of times people call
me and I just give and give and give and
give and talk about their problems, and every once in
a while I have a problem as well. I'm not
saying you can help me with it, but thank you
for listening. But no, I was listening and it seems
like what you're describing as a car. Okay, that's definitely
(06:13):
worth looking into. I appreciate that a car. I mean no,
I don't have a car. No. Um, okay, okay, Well
something to think about. I mean, yeah, do you have
a driver's license? I don't have a driver's license. Now
there's a reason for that as well. What is that reason?
I don't like having my picture taken and I understand
(06:34):
in order to drive a car, you have to have
an identification card. How did how did you pose for
your ad campaign? There's an organization that you can contact
that specializes in covert portraiture, so you know that they're
going to take a portrait of you at some time
during the next X number of weeks, and a lot
(06:55):
of times they'll do it right on that first day
because you're on high alert. But you're on such high
that you're not actually paying you know what I mean.
Like you're sort of like you're looking in all the
wrong places and their pros um but you just know
that they're going to take beautiful portraits of you at
some time during the next three weeks or whatever. You
never know where. That's why a lot of those on
a lot of those um ads with my picture on it,
(07:16):
I seem confused or wet. Yeah, I now, looking back,
there is there is one that is shot from you're
looking over your shoulder, but it does look like you're
running away. It looks like you're it looks like you're
fleeing something. Yeah, they do a thing where they make
they make a loud noise to get you to look
behind you and then they capture the photos. But that
(07:38):
happens to me a lot. I'm always hearing loud noises
and running away, So it could have been from any
time at all. But thank you for being a fan. Well, okay, no,
I mean I enjoy the show. Let's let's get back
to your problem. You're Yeah, there's a divot on your
shoulder and you're and even though your boyfriend's finger fits
in it perfectly, which to me would be a symbol
(07:59):
that this is the person that you meant to be
with for the rest of your life, and this universal
communion that you're talking about is taking place on multiple levels,
physical and spiritual. You are too much of a baby
to tell him you don't like it? Is that right?
You need baby food and a debee? Oh wow, that's
that's aggressive. I don't like that tone. All right? Should
I try a good cop? Then? Could you look? Look?
(08:21):
Dr Reese comes in here. He comes in with his
with his fist swing, and it's because he was never
really loved, you know, So he's trying to find tough
love with anybody who comes in here. But the minute
you show him a little bit of vulnerability, he just
wants to shut it down. But I'm telling you, Dr Sex,
he's a good guy. He really wants to help you out, Dave.
So why don't you tell me what what's the real problem?
(08:42):
Why won't you talk to your boyfriend about this? Are
you not Dr Reese? Now? I'm good cop Dr Reese? Okay,
but you're just talking about Dr Reese like he was
a different person. Yeah, bad cop, doctor Reese. Oh you
want coffee, Dave. Yeah, come on into the kitchen and
get it with the lights out. You'll see what happens
(09:04):
to people like you. I don't know if that makes
sense either. I don't know what setting we're in. I
don't know what's saying. Okay, I don't either. Set the stage,
please for for for this interrogation. Uh, do you want
me to have a mustache? What do you want? Yeah,
it feels like you would have a mustache, and and
(09:25):
like the transitions lenses. Okay, yeah, I got that. All right,
let's start out. Okay, here I come, okay. And it's
just a room. Yeah, and you've been sitting in there
with a flickering lights, yeah, thinking about the scar and
how your boyfriend's finger fits. Right, okay, here, I come, okay,
(09:48):
all right, punk, So what's the problem. You don't like
the fact that your boyfriend puts his finger in your
scar every once in a while. Listen to me. Everything
else about your life is great. Everything you've asked for
you've gotten. Your problem is you don't know to look
at a good thing when you have it, My friend,
you and if you keep looking somewhere else for good things.
Guess what, You're never gonna get it? You know why,
because people don't like people who don't appreciate what they have,
(10:13):
and I should you know, I have a good mind.
Give you a mouthful of bloody chicklets. I would kill
for what you have. Punk wow. Alright, alright, alright, calm down,
Dr Rees, Calm down, Doctor Rees, Dave. Can I get
you a cup of tea or anything like that? You
want to talk about this? Are you afraid to tell
(10:33):
him because you're afraid that you might lose him? Yeah?
All right? Have you ever asked him if he's afraid
of losing you? No, Maybe the reason he's putting his
finger in that gross scar ears because he wants to
feel even closer to you than he can during the
physical act of love. Maybe the reason that he won't
(10:55):
ask you about it is because he's just as afraid
of losing you as you are of losing him. Dr Reese,
I have to tell you both both approaches worked really well.
Thank you, You're very welcome. And if that doesn't work,
I just suggest that you just pack up and leave
the guy alright, because no one needs that. No one
(11:16):
needs that. Life's too short for that. Okay, and also
make sure you're putting neo sporing on it. It's from
seven years ago. Yeah, but you never know. Okay, Okay, Dave,
thanks for calling. I hope that was helpful, and if
it wasn't, I at least hope you enjoyed my performance.
I did, Thank you. Dr Reese. Another satisfied customer. All right,
(11:39):
let's pay some bills and then we'll be right back. Okay,
let's take a moment to hear from one of our sponsors.
Thank you to the non fetish Spatula, the only spatula
designed so that I can't be used for any kind
of fetish, whether it be spanking or a cooking based fetish.
(12:03):
Flip with confidence with the non fetish spatula wherever non
sexual objects are soul. All right, thank you to our sponsors.
Thank you for your support, continued support, and mystifying support
of the Doctor Sex Rees Show. Today's topic is scars
(12:26):
so far, I would give this episode a C plus.
Let's see if our next caller can bring it up
to a B minus. I have on the line, Donna
bessek Am I saying that right, Donna Beska, Well, thank
you and welcome to the Doctor Sex re Show. How
can I help you? Oh? Thank you so much. It's
great a long time listener. It's great to finally get
(12:48):
to talk to you. So my boyfriend, I would prefer
it if he looked like a young j C. From
and Sink the Band. And you know, I told him
I'm willing to pay for the plastic surgery to do it.
But he was, I guess like butt her by the suggestion.
(13:11):
And so now, how can I convince him that it's
perfectly normal to surgically alter your appearance to look like
the celebrity of your partner's choice. Well, let me ask
you this. How did you broach the subject with him? Yeah,
it was just kind of a funny thing. Um, we
were out having a date night, having a great time.
(13:32):
We'll put back up you the Grownies, and we're actually
in Hollywood, and I thought I saw J C. Chaze
and then I just kind of said I just kind
of said it. I was like, he's such a good
looking guy, you know, like what about Like what do
you think about this idea type of thing? Now? Did
(13:52):
you come up with the idea on the spot there
or is this something you've been thinking about for a
while I just kind of popped in my head. Now
I can't put the idea to rest, and I just
will not. And to you, is it is it? Would
it be a financial burden to pay for this plastic surgery?
Oh no, I I told him right away. I said,
(14:15):
I will absolutely pay every red cent of it. Don't
worry about it, babe, Mama has got you covered. And
that wasn't good enough for him. No, he in fact
told me it was not about the money at all.
Oh well, then what was it about? He said, I
don't want another face. It's so messed up of you
(14:36):
to try to say that you can put on someone
else's face on my face, Like that's really hurtful. But
he also, as he said, I love you to you, yeah,
he really loves me a lot. And do you love him? Oh?
I love him to the moon and back. But it
would be better if he looked like this jac Chase
(14:57):
from in Sync. Well, I think love is about conform
rising on preferences and so like, I assumed he wasn't
gonna maybe give me so much pushback on this right now,
surely you sound like a reasonable woman to me. You
must have made some concessions to this guy at some
point in time, right, Yeah, he said he wanted us
(15:17):
to be a dairy free household, and you know that
was something I was really not on board with. I'm
not really into the whole nut milk craze. I think
it's a little funny. But guess what, I love him
so and you're slurping out milk left and right now,
even though you hated the taste of it. It makes
you nauseous. Yeah, I'm choking down oat milk out of
(15:39):
love for my honey. So j C. Scha for you?
Is is he? Would you consider him to be the ultimate? Like?
Is he your number one? Or is it that you
think that that face would fit well on your boyfriend's body? Yeah? Yeah,
I I just think Jac is as pretty slamming as
it gets, and I would actually like to heat my boyfriend.
(16:02):
But just have j C. Chas based on it. Have
you done any um, any role playing to this end.
Have you pretended to be the tour manager or anything
and then catching J. C. Chase in the in the
dressing room and having to yell at him or demand
that they, you know, work harder at their dance moves,
(16:23):
or have you pretended ever to be his accountant and
when he finds out that you've been skimming money off
the top and you have to seduce him or anything
like that. It's funny that you asked that, because yeah,
I was role playing on my end um. I was
playing his tour manager, and I was like, hurry up, Jac,
come on, let's go chop chop, we gotta get to rehearsal.
(16:47):
And then he wasn't really playing back. Okay, so how
long did this go on where you were pretending to
be J. C. Chase as tour manager without your boyfriend's
knowledge that he was playing j. C. Shaw's a in
your fantasy kind of any time we got into the bedroom.
I I have done a lot. I've read a lot
(17:08):
of romance and sex books and they say, really just
kind of be vulnerable, put your heart out and go
into the role play because sometimes maybe your partner it
will take them a while to get into it with you.
Do you usually tell him that you're about to do
the role play, or you just jumping in and assuming
that he's going to figure it out. I say, I'm oh, hell,
(17:30):
I'm the tour manager from Encinc. You know me, and
let's get going and then um, sometimes usually like he
will push me out of bed, or shut the door
on me, or or try and hide in the closet. Yeah,
those are those seem to be pretty strong signals unless
now there's a possibility that he is role playing, and
(17:53):
that he's role playing as J. C. Chaz A, role
playing as a prison guard or a big motorcycle brute. Okay,
you know, and that you are not aware of the
next level of role play that he is doing, like
he might be playing three dimensional role played chess with
(18:14):
you and you're still playing checkers. My honey, whoa, I
haven't even considered that. I mean that day is again
why you are the expert. That wasn't pretty crazy if
I was getting three D chess played. Even if that
is happening and he is actually incredibly plot driven, I
still how about the surgery though, I want my surgery
(18:37):
for him? And how much have you looked into how
much this surgery might cost? I think it's upwards of
seventy five thousand dollars, but probably a closer. Yeah, probably
a lot higher than that. I think that was on
the cheaper end of this place I found in Chino.
But um, all right, you might want to consider other countries.
(18:58):
That's a good idea. Yeah, I'm you could kind of
fold a vacation into it and sort of make a
whole thing. Now what I think is actually happening here.
If you want to know my take on it, he's
playing almost impossible to get. You need to if he's
playing three D chess with you, you need to play
(19:18):
for D or five D chess with him, and you
need to basically create a scenario where what I'm basically
saying is you should either kidnap him or take him
on vacation and while you're there get the surgery through
some you know, through some I don't want to say
(19:39):
tricky means, but through some playful role playing means. Yeah. Yeah,
you could create a scenario where when you're in I mean,
I know, Vietnam is a place where you could go
to get some of the stuff done. Thailand is a
place where you could go to get some of the
stuff done. Yeah. Yeah, I did a little bit of research.
We found a place for them in Peru and it
(20:00):
was a very similar situation um and we actually wound
up as part of the whole package deal. The doctors
themselves actually pose as drug cartel members. Yeah, and then
you can sort of like it's a it's because it's
kind of fun too, because it's it takes a role
playing to the next level. They you know, put you
(20:20):
through a little bit of a car chase, corner you
in an alley, they would pretend to knock you out. Yeah,
it's like a video game. Yeah exactly. And then he
and then you kind of see like, well, what's gonna happen.
Is my boyfriend gonna play along with this? Is he's
going to put up a fight? Is he going to
quickly fold? So you get to learn a little bit
about them too, bing bang boom. Next thing you know, uh,
you guys are back state side. You know, he's probably
(20:44):
been asleep for two three weeks. Take off the bandages.
Looks exactly like j C. Chaz A. Damn, I knew
you would have all the solutions. This is why I
always listen to That's Crazy. Yeah, because you know, we've
had on a dating app and he said on there,
he said looking for a girl who loves adventure, and
(21:06):
so like, I know that he actually wants this, he
just doesn't really know it, and like, only someone like
me who loves him, so much would do this and
pay for it. I mean, even though I am a
very rich woman, it is expensive. Now, let me just
to be clear. Has he ever said the word no
(21:28):
to your request to have him change his face to
look like J. C. Chaz A from in Sync? Yeah?
I know. He said that very very clearly, and he
said no. If you ask me that again, I'm going
to freak out. And he said, um, that's extremely insulting
that you would need another face to be in love
(21:49):
with me like that type of thing. Right, So he's
really playing the long game on this one. The game
is a foot so to speak. It's a it's a
it's a it's a war of wits at this point
between you and he, is it not? It's seeming more
and more like that now that you say that, and
and now that I'm seeing it from your fresh expert eye,
that feel like I can really turn up the high
(22:13):
to high gear, you know, right. So I think at
this point you need to start putting the onus back
on him right down? Okay? Good onus is O n
U S. Let's be very careful with that word. I
think you want to drop the subject and never bring
it up again, you know, for a while until we
(22:35):
get to the point, until we get to the end
game in a foreign country with like got a um
incredible resort, and then we go like kind of maybe
for a day trip, and things kind of take a turn. Yeah, exactly.
Maybe there's a maybe there's a local tour guide who
befriends you and seems it seems extremely congenial and unlike
(22:55):
the other people who are constantly trying to take advantage
of American tourists, he wants to show you the real whatever.
Right next thing you know, you guys are driving down
a dirt road that you don't recognize. Things are starting
to get a little harry. A few other people on
motorcycles show up. The air condition goes out, air conditioning
goes out. He leaves the truck to go take care
(23:15):
of it, or maybe it's a bus of some kind,
and then on walk the paramilitary people who are actually
not paramilitary people that are actually nurses at the plastic
surgery facility. But he doesn't know this. But it's all
part of the game. It's all part of the game.
The only thing I would say is after if you
go through all of it, watch out for his next move.
(23:36):
You know, because whatever he has, he's he's he's not
going to be able to help. But appreciate how much
effort you put into this surprise, right, Yeah, I think
so cute. I think he's really going to come around
because like he doesn't see he is. But it's really
I'm doing this for him because what could be more
beautiful than looking like nineties Fox star j C shows it.
(23:59):
But here is the only issue that I see with this,
and this is literally the only issue. Can he also
bust a move in the same way j C could?
And if not, is that going to be a problem.
Do you want to go in to get a knee
surgery done at the same time? Um? Wha, I mean yeah,
this is why they pay you the big box because
(24:22):
I haven't really thought of that. Like, We've been playing
partner boc ball, and I have noticed he kind of
drags one leg a little bit, which really, um takes
me off. Yeah, I mean is that because of how
he's affecting your BOCY game or is it because it's
kind of ruining your image of perfection that you're trying
to project onto this guy, doctor Doctor, I'm not trying
(24:45):
to push any perfection on him. Other than just being
JC and think. But you know, when I'm out here,
we're trying to do our couples fun games, and this
dude can't keep up. I think also we need to
slip in a knee surgery, as you show apt Lee suggested. Now,
(25:09):
there is one issue I want to bring up, which is,
what if he's not actually involved in an elaborate game
of cat and mouse with you? And what if after
you go through all of this, you've done a terrible
disservice to him as a person, to the two of
you as a as a couple. And then also, you know,
committed a number of crimes. I mean, you've got to
(25:31):
have I think you have to have a bit of
an exit strategy there. I mean, what do you mean, like,
I'm not really committing any crimes. I think we all agreed.
I was just helping him, doing what's best for him.
I know, but sometimes people don't know when they're getting
the help that they need and they lash out. Um,
I don't really want anyone to bother me just because
(25:52):
I'm doing the right thing. But um, I guess I'm
going to roll the dice because you only live once.
But it Yeah, if anyone also comes after me, then
I don't know, there could be kind of like a
price to pay for them, right for them, Yeah, because
you're not someone who's going to forget any slight Right.
You didn't get to where you are by letting people
(26:13):
by living and let living you know, right? Did you know? No?
I was one of the richestle in California. Um, yeah,
I've had to step on a few next to get
where I am. But look, I mean it's gets stepped
on or step or gets stepped on, is what I
always say in in my ted talks. Now have you
have you made any of these requests with with previous
(26:34):
boyfriends anything similar? How has that gone? Um? I kind
of just made my last partner as many years ago,
just like dress up and go. I forced him to
go by the name j C. Chaz And was he
okay with that? At first? No, No, he was not,
But then he kind of just got used to it
(26:55):
because it's not a big deal, right, and also with
your money power, you know, an influence, it's like, what
is he going to do about it? Yeah? I said, sweetie,
it's okay, you're Jason. You are not You're j C.
Cha now, But I will buy you a tiger. And
did you buy that tiger? Yeah? Yeah, yeah? How much
do tiger's cost? Just out of curiosity, UM, this one
(27:16):
I think was like dollars wow. Yeah, and to you
that's nothing. Oh no, that's a penny in the bucket. Listen.
I gotta tell you, I think you're a hero, UM
for going after what you want. I think you're very accomplished,
uh person. And I can tell by the timber of
(27:37):
your voice that you're also a person who gets what
she wants. And I like that. I like that a lot. Yeah,
thank you. I'm going to send you a tiger, please
do so, I guess. Uh. The only other thing is,
you know, could you lend me forty dollars? UM? Yeah,
well maybe I might need you to do a few
(27:59):
things for me first, like what beyond just this incredible
advice and yeah, and I just want to reiterate and
thank you so much for this advice. I've been listening
for so long, like basically your entire time on UM.
But I would if I can also request this offline too.
But I was wondering if I could just have UM
(28:22):
one of your ears for the forty dollars because I
just wanted like a token because I am such a
huge fan. Odd to me, how premeditated that sounds from
something that seemed like a kind of a spontaneous transaction.
But yet again, you're the master and I'm the king.
(28:43):
So we're going to meet somewhere in the middle. Oh yeah,
just a friendly thing, you know. Well, Donna, Um, I
want you to keep me up to date on how
this is going. And then yeah, I wish you the
best of luck. Thank you so much. I really appreciate
you really has some incredible ideas and advice, and I
really feel, you know, soothed and comfortable with my choice
and decision. Now good great, um off air. Uh, my
(29:06):
producer Shelley will give you my routing number. Okay, no problem,
I'll send over my guy your guy. Well, I dread that,
but I do thank you for your call, Donna bessek
uh and uh yeah, please tell your friends, all right,
thank you so much, Okay, goodbye bye. Every once in
(29:29):
a while you get somebody on the air who uh
is true to themselves, true to their heart, knows what
they want and will stop nothing to get it. And
I have to say I admire that as a coward
and as a mid range celebrity. This is the Doctor
Sex re Show. I'm your host, Dr Robert sex Reese.
Today's topic is scars were two for two and I
(29:51):
would say right now, yeah, this episode probably just got
bumped up to a solid B. Let's take him inute
here to hear from one of our sponsors on The
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(30:11):
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(31:00):
get very hashtag try again. That's this week in Twitter
from eight to eleven am every Monday. This is the
Doctor Sex re Show. I'm your host, Dr Robert sex Reest.
Today's topic is scars. I have our next caller on
(31:24):
the line, Jordan's Jordan's You're on with Dr Sex Reese.
That's me, Hi, doctor. Well, I'll just I'll just jump
right into it. As a teenager, I went into a
haunted house with a friend on a dare and that
night lost my virginity in the haunted house and um,
during a real haunting. Yeah, what I believe to be
(31:46):
a real haunting. I mean, I know some people believe
in this stuff and some people don't. And I don't
want to like push my you know, agenda on anybody,
but yeah, I believe it to be to be an
authentic haunting. And that has kind of affected my adult
sex life because now I can't I can't climax or
I can't I can't come unless I am unless I'm terrified. Yeah,
(32:13):
and I would like to, you know, find a way
to have sex without being scared. Do they have them
put on a scary mask? Are you? Are you playing
scary music? What? Yeah, it's it's it's it's escalated over
the years. I mean obviously, as a you know, in
my younger days, you know, it was fairly mild. I
you know, would just ask partners. If it was okay,
(32:35):
if I, you know, put on a spooky Halloween sound
effects tape, I don't know if you remember those from
childhood on tapes and c D s. No, wow, okay, Um,
how's a sound on CD A little crisper. But there's
something about the warmth of a cassette tape that I
just am partial to. But yeah, but kind of started
(32:55):
out like that that was fairly mild. And now you know,
I'm a I'm a thirty eight year old halt and
and it just it takes more to get me off.
I mean sorry if that that's a little bit crass.
But now I need a you know, I need to
be doused with a hose that shoots blood. I need to,
(33:16):
you know, see my dead mother's head in the mirror
when I closed the medicine cabinet during sex, during sex. Yeah,
the degree of horror that I need to ejaculate is frankly,
it's not it's not sustainable. Give me some of the
details about about the night that you lost your v
(33:38):
V word in this haunted house. What's the setting set
the stage for me? Sure? I mean, well, I grew
up in a small town in Maine, and um, you
know there was a really colorful history. There were a
lot of you know, like factory fires and you know
mill fires and witch burnings and you know circuses that
(33:58):
burned down, and you know, so obviously you know, as
as as a kid, you know, one of the rights
of passages, you know, spending the night in a haunted structure. Um,
you know, an old mill about house right, a mental
hospital men silent, yeah, an old prison, all these all
these work. And so you know, as as a kid,
(34:20):
I spent the night with a with a with a
friend at a in a in a house that you
know they called the Old sat Or White Place, and
you know, we went through a supernatural ordeal there that
culminated in us having sex. And it's kind of just
been part of my DNA ever since. So the Saturn
(34:41):
White Place itself, what was it? Was it a father
who went crazy and killed his whole family? Was it
bride left at the altar who killed everyone who came
to the wedding? And you can still, you know, see
her in her wedding dress. While you were having sex,
you spotted the ghost bride or we well, we fought,
we fought with the ghost bride um in the attic
(35:03):
and we we were able to to force her through
a portal to a hell dimension. Okay, and then my
my friend and I we had sex with each other.
And as I was climaxing, the bride's hand reached back
through the portal and grabbed my my hooded sweatshirt and
(35:25):
I was able to wriggle out of it as the
portal was, you know, sucking the hand back in. But yeah,
it really just changed everything for me. I think you
got to go back to the original scene where you
lost your virginity. But I think the most important thing
is that by the end of it, you need to
burn the old, sadder white place down, just like kill
all evidence of this ever having happened, because then you
(35:48):
can actually, especially if you do, rekindle a relationship with someone.
And the two of you were looking into each other's
eyes as the as the reflection of the fire glimmers, right,
and maybe we kind of slowly start to join hands
as were watching the as we're watching the house burn. Yeah,
and with it your your trauma and your pain. You know,
(36:09):
that's something you could do. I guess here's a concern
is that, um, you know, like obviously burning down that house,
um is easier said than done. Well, this is the
other thing I wanted to ask you about, and I've
I've been a little I've been a little wary to
do it because you're obviously emotionally raw. But what do
you know about this bride that you pushed back into
(36:30):
the into the hell dimension? Is there anything? Is there any?
Could it possibly be the case that when she was
reaching out of that portal to grab you is because
she cared about you? Oh? Boy? Um, I don't know.
I mean I was just sixteen, so I mean obviously
it's be a little bit problematic, But I mean, you
know that's yeah, that's that's true. A lot of life
(36:54):
experience under your belt, and you probably know what you
want a lot more than you did when you were sixteen.
You know, if she can get past the whole being
pushed into the hell dimension thing, um, you know, if
she's like you said you were six she she made
mistakes too, that's true. She did kill everyone at her wedding.
If you can reopen the hell portal and get down
in there, maybe I don't know, Maybe you're just maybe
(37:17):
you're just the man she's been waiting for and and
maybe she's what you've been looking for all this time.
I guess it's possible. I mean, you know, it would
get my motor going. Tell your boss you're taking a
four day weekend, Get in the car, put on some
Genesis and dry like Phil Collins Genesis. Yes, the two
(37:39):
of you may wind up living forever in the hell dimension,
and then then you have all the time in the
world to figure this stuff out. Do you think I
would be happy in the hell dimension? Are you happy? Now?
Oh boy, that's a big question. Um, I mean not
as happy as I could be. I'll be I'll be
perfectly honest with you. Yeah. I mean again, my my
job pays the bills, but it's it's not my path.
(38:00):
And I'm in publishing. I work for a small press
that does mainly kind of cookbooks and bartending guides and
things like that. Um. Yeah, nobody's buying books anymore, you know. No. Yeah,
well we do a pretty good e book business honestly.
But it's something you could talk to her about. I'm
sure she doesn't even know what the internet is. Yeah,
I guess I could tell her about modern times and
she can scream in your face. It sounds pretty nice.
(38:23):
So keep me, keep me in the loop, keep me updated,
let me know if you're able to. You know, I
don't know if you might wind up in this hell
dimension if all goes well, but uh, yeah, I wish
you the best Jordans I think thanks, Yeah, I know
you really, Yeah, you really have an ear for this stuff,
you really like Um yeah, you really. I feel like
took the words right out of my mouth and a
lot of a lot of occasions. So thank you very much.
(38:45):
Another satisfied customer. Um and uh, I'm sure there's hundreds
of you out there who have had similar experiences and
are dealing with a very similar issue. Hopefully this provided
some guidance for you too, whether it's a whether it's
a fisherman who haunts your town, or a pirate ship
(39:07):
under your city, or giant worms, whatever the case, maybe
I wish you all the best of luck. Thank you
very much. Well, we're at the end of the show,
and I gotta say, other than that perennium thing about
the scar at the top of the show, Jeff f
and his bull crap did not come up once. That's
a win. It actually felt kind of good to help
(39:29):
Jordan there. Thanks to everyone for listening. Keep your mind opening,
your eyes closed. As The Doctor sex Rees Show I
have been your host, Dr Robert sex Reese. Make sure
(39:58):
to rate, review, and subscribe to The Doctor sex Risho
wherever you listen to your favorite podcasts
Make sure to subscribe, rate, and review The Doctor Sex
re Show wherever you listen to your favorite podcasts. On
today's episode of The Doctor Sex Reese Show, we talked
to a caller who's squeamish about his shoulder, a woman
with a wild request for her lover, and a man
(00:21):
who can't cream without a scream. And now The Doctor
Sex Reese Show with your host, Dr Robert sex Reese.
This is the Doctor Robert sex re Show. I'm Dr
Robert sex Reese. How can I help you today? Every
caller that calls me, I take as it's me or them.
(00:45):
I don't like that either, honestly, now that I'm hearing
it come from you, very excited to talk about this,
Can you give me a second? I'm choking on a walnut.
You know you're on the air. Can we just put
aside our differences and agree that I was right, very
impatient to hear your question, but also living in fear
of it. I'm rowing gems at you and you just
keep dropping them in the river. My situation is, I'm
doing what I love. I'm free from human touch, and
(01:07):
I'm here to give what I have to you. Hello, Hello, Helloha,
and Welcome to the Doctors Sex Reese Show. Today's topic
is scars. Now, for years, I've been trying everything I
can to keep people away from sex, because you know,
people get hurt, and sometimes that hurt can lead to scars.
(01:32):
But it's not just from the lashes of a poorly
handled cat of nine tails or from having every muscle
in your body go into a Charlie Horse causing you
to collapse into your stained glass coffee table. There's mental
scars as well. There's emotional scars, and even relationships can
be scarred. And actually it's kind of weird that this
(01:53):
topic came up today. I originally thought we were going
to talk about state parks, not having sex in them, no,
but the general appreciation of state parks and how they
can turn you on mentally and emotionally. But our new
producer Shelley, Hello Shelly, and for me that the topic
of parks is too politically charged at the moment, which
(02:14):
is a complete surprise to me because I rarely follow
the news. But apparently it's a part is an issue,
and since I am a coward, I refuse to talk
about politics. So instead today we're covering scars, which is
doubly odd and suspect because I just heard back from
my doctor, which I'm revealing here for the first time ever,
that I do indeed have a scar on my perennium,
(02:38):
which is what you goblins might call a taint. And
I was not aware of this scar because I do
not ever look at my body below the belly button,
and I honestly either pass out or go into a
fugue state during routine physical exams. So this is all
new to me, and it's a lot to process. So
it turns out that one of Jeff F's lies might
have a little bit of truth to it. But that's
(02:59):
how you know it's a lie. Now, did Chili choose
this topic because she already knew about the scar on
my perennium? Is she in cahoots with my doctor? Is
everyone in cahoots against me? I don't know all of
that aside. I'm here to help you, and I want
(03:20):
to help you with your own scars. So let's open
the lines to our callers. We're gonna talk about scars
today on the Doctor Sex Reese Show. Our first caller
is Dave Hidr Reese. Um, here's my question, I have, Um,
I have a scar that I am very self conscious about,
(03:41):
and when my boyfriend and I have sex, uh, he
likes to touch it. His ring finger kind of fits
right into the low divid that it is, and he
just kind of likes to do it. I also don't
like it because it's it brings up bad feelings and
I'm self conscious and it's I've had memories and feelings
(04:02):
associated with it, and I want him to stop. But
I you know, but also sex is very you know,
otherwise good, and it's and it's we're intimate and connected
and I don't want to take him out of the moment.
Have you guys tried not having sex at all? Right now?
I like having We both like having sex. So no, honestly,
(04:23):
why this is something I've been wanting to ask people
for a long time and I never got a straight
answer here. Yeah, it's just it's it's a feeling of
oneness with the universe when you have an organstic. But but
but the rest of it is also everything around it
is is something that I find very pleasurable. It's it's um,
it's a way to get more intimate with your partner.
It's um, you feel like you're sort of physically in
(04:43):
a bubble where no one else exists. That that would
be nice. I would love to be in a bubble
where no one else exists, but also no one else
is touching me. Because when you're a public figure like
I am, and you go out in public and you
recognize which I surprisingly am recognized quite a bit. Um, Yeah,
I think I would. I would be able to pick
(05:05):
you out of it. Yeah. People sometimes will hear my
my my voice and recognized me able to just sort
of sense I'm around generally where people want to touch me,
as well as on busses, and I don't like it,
and yes, it is, it is true, um, And I
ride a lot of busses, And there's a reason why,
because I like buses. I've always liked busses. Something deeper
(05:27):
than that. No, I just didn't want people to think
it was because I was poor or anything like that.
It's because I enjoy the experience of riding a bus.
And but I hate people and I don't like being
close to people. So I would love to find some
sort of portable bubble that would keep people away from
me while also being able to see what's happening around
(05:48):
me at all times. Because I don't also trust people.
This isn't that important, Dave. It's just something that I've
been thinking about. And a lot of times people call
me and I just give and give and give and
give and talk about their problems, and every once in
a while I have a problem as well. I'm not
saying you can help me with it, but thank you
for listening. But no, I was listening and it seems
like what you're describing as a car. Okay, that's definitely
(06:13):
worth looking into. I appreciate that a car. I mean no,
I don't have a car. No. Um, okay, okay, Well
something to think about. I mean, yeah, do you have
a driver's license? I don't have a driver's license. Now
there's a reason for that as well. What is that reason?
I don't like having my picture taken and I understand
(06:34):
in order to drive a car, you have to have
an identification card. How did how did you pose for
your ad campaign? There's an organization that you can contact
that specializes in covert portraiture, so you know that they're
going to take a portrait of you at some time
during the next X number of weeks, and a lot
(06:55):
of times they'll do it right on that first day
because you're on high alert. But you're on such high
that you're not actually paying you know what I mean.
Like you're sort of like you're looking in all the
wrong places and their pros um but you just know
that they're going to take beautiful portraits of you at
some time during the next three weeks or whatever. You
never know where. That's why a lot of those on
a lot of those um ads with my picture on it,
(07:16):
I seem confused or wet. Yeah, I now, looking back,
there is there is one that is shot from you're
looking over your shoulder, but it does look like you're
running away. It looks like you're it looks like you're
fleeing something. Yeah, they do a thing where they make
they make a loud noise to get you to look
behind you and then they capture the photos. But that
(07:38):
happens to me a lot. I'm always hearing loud noises
and running away, So it could have been from any
time at all. But thank you for being a fan. Well, okay, no,
I mean I enjoy the show. Let's let's get back
to your problem. You're Yeah, there's a divot on your
shoulder and you're and even though your boyfriend's finger fits
in it perfectly, which to me would be a symbol
(07:59):
that this is the person that you meant to be
with for the rest of your life, and this universal
communion that you're talking about is taking place on multiple levels,
physical and spiritual. You are too much of a baby
to tell him you don't like it? Is that right?
You need baby food and a debee? Oh wow, that's
that's aggressive. I don't like that tone. All right? Should
I try a good cop? Then? Could you look? Look?
(08:21):
Dr Reese comes in here. He comes in with his
with his fist swing, and it's because he was never
really loved, you know, So he's trying to find tough
love with anybody who comes in here. But the minute
you show him a little bit of vulnerability, he just
wants to shut it down. But I'm telling you, Dr Sex,
he's a good guy. He really wants to help you out, Dave.
So why don't you tell me what what's the real problem?
(08:42):
Why won't you talk to your boyfriend about this? Are
you not Dr Reese? Now? I'm good cop Dr Reese? Okay,
but you're just talking about Dr Reese like he was
a different person. Yeah, bad cop, doctor Reese. Oh you
want coffee, Dave. Yeah, come on into the kitchen and
get it with the lights out. You'll see what happens
(09:04):
to people like you. I don't know if that makes
sense either. I don't know what setting we're in. I
don't know what's saying. Okay, I don't either. Set the stage,
please for for for this interrogation. Uh, do you want
me to have a mustache? What do you want? Yeah,
it feels like you would have a mustache, and and
(09:25):
like the transitions lenses. Okay, yeah, I got that. All right,
let's start out. Okay, here I come, okay. And it's
just a room. Yeah, and you've been sitting in there
with a flickering lights, yeah, thinking about the scar and
how your boyfriend's finger fits. Right, okay, here, I come, okay,
(09:48):
all right, punk, So what's the problem. You don't like
the fact that your boyfriend puts his finger in your
scar every once in a while. Listen to me. Everything
else about your life is great. Everything you've asked for
you've gotten. Your problem is you don't know to look
at a good thing when you have it, My friend,
you and if you keep looking somewhere else for good things.
Guess what, You're never gonna get it? You know why,
because people don't like people who don't appreciate what they have,
(10:13):
and I should you know, I have a good mind.
Give you a mouthful of bloody chicklets. I would kill
for what you have. Punk wow. Alright, alright, alright, calm down,
Dr Rees, Calm down, Doctor Rees, Dave. Can I get
you a cup of tea or anything like that? You
want to talk about this? Are you afraid to tell
(10:33):
him because you're afraid that you might lose him? Yeah?
All right? Have you ever asked him if he's afraid
of losing you? No, Maybe the reason he's putting his
finger in that gross scar ears because he wants to
feel even closer to you than he can during the
physical act of love. Maybe the reason that he won't
(10:55):
ask you about it is because he's just as afraid
of losing you as you are of losing him. Dr Reese,
I have to tell you both both approaches worked really well.
Thank you, You're very welcome. And if that doesn't work,
I just suggest that you just pack up and leave
the guy alright, because no one needs that. No one
(11:16):
needs that. Life's too short for that. Okay, and also
make sure you're putting neo sporing on it. It's from
seven years ago. Yeah, but you never know. Okay, Okay, Dave,
thanks for calling. I hope that was helpful, and if
it wasn't, I at least hope you enjoyed my performance.
I did, Thank you. Dr Reese. Another satisfied customer. All right,
(11:39):
let's pay some bills and then we'll be right back. Okay,
let's take a moment to hear from one of our sponsors.
Thank you to the non fetish Spatula, the only spatula
designed so that I can't be used for any kind
of fetish, whether it be spanking or a cooking based fetish.
(12:03):
Flip with confidence with the non fetish spatula wherever non
sexual objects are soul. All right, thank you to our sponsors.
Thank you for your support, continued support, and mystifying support
of the Doctor Sex Rees Show. Today's topic is scars
(12:26):
so far, I would give this episode a C plus.
Let's see if our next caller can bring it up
to a B minus. I have on the line, Donna
bessek Am I saying that right, Donna Beska, Well, thank
you and welcome to the Doctor Sex re Show. How
can I help you? Oh? Thank you so much. It's
great a long time listener. It's great to finally get
(12:48):
to talk to you. So my boyfriend, I would prefer
it if he looked like a young j C. From
and Sink the Band. And you know, I told him
I'm willing to pay for the plastic surgery to do it.
But he was, I guess like butt her by the suggestion.
(13:11):
And so now, how can I convince him that it's
perfectly normal to surgically alter your appearance to look like
the celebrity of your partner's choice. Well, let me ask
you this. How did you broach the subject with him? Yeah,
it was just kind of a funny thing. Um, we
were out having a date night, having a great time.
(13:32):
We'll put back up you the Grownies, and we're actually
in Hollywood, and I thought I saw J C. Chaze
and then I just kind of said I just kind
of said it. I was like, he's such a good
looking guy, you know, like what about Like what do
you think about this idea type of thing? Now? Did
(13:52):
you come up with the idea on the spot there
or is this something you've been thinking about for a
while I just kind of popped in my head. Now
I can't put the idea to rest, and I just
will not. And to you, is it is it? Would
it be a financial burden to pay for this plastic surgery?
Oh no, I I told him right away. I said,
(14:15):
I will absolutely pay every red cent of it. Don't
worry about it, babe, Mama has got you covered. And
that wasn't good enough for him. No, he in fact
told me it was not about the money at all.
Oh well, then what was it about? He said, I
don't want another face. It's so messed up of you
(14:36):
to try to say that you can put on someone
else's face on my face, Like that's really hurtful. But
he also, as he said, I love you to you, yeah,
he really loves me a lot. And do you love him? Oh?
I love him to the moon and back. But it
would be better if he looked like this jac Chase
(14:57):
from in Sync. Well, I think love is about conform
rising on preferences and so like, I assumed he wasn't
gonna maybe give me so much pushback on this right now,
surely you sound like a reasonable woman to me. You
must have made some concessions to this guy at some
point in time, right, Yeah, he said he wanted us
(15:17):
to be a dairy free household, and you know that
was something I was really not on board with. I'm
not really into the whole nut milk craze. I think
it's a little funny. But guess what, I love him
so and you're slurping out milk left and right now,
even though you hated the taste of it. It makes
you nauseous. Yeah, I'm choking down oat milk out of
(15:39):
love for my honey. So j C. Scha for you?
Is is he? Would you consider him to be the ultimate? Like?
Is he your number one? Or is it that you
think that that face would fit well on your boyfriend's body? Yeah? Yeah,
I I just think Jac is as pretty slamming as
it gets, and I would actually like to heat my boyfriend.
(16:02):
But just have j C. Chas based on it. Have
you done any um, any role playing to this end.
Have you pretended to be the tour manager or anything
and then catching J. C. Chase in the in the
dressing room and having to yell at him or demand
that they, you know, work harder at their dance moves,
(16:23):
or have you pretended ever to be his accountant and
when he finds out that you've been skimming money off
the top and you have to seduce him or anything
like that. It's funny that you asked that, because yeah,
I was role playing on my end um. I was
playing his tour manager, and I was like, hurry up, Jac,
come on, let's go chop chop, we gotta get to rehearsal.
(16:47):
And then he wasn't really playing back. Okay, so how
long did this go on where you were pretending to
be J. C. Chase as tour manager without your boyfriend's
knowledge that he was playing j. C. Shaw's a in
your fantasy kind of any time we got into the bedroom.
I I have done a lot. I've read a lot
(17:08):
of romance and sex books and they say, really just
kind of be vulnerable, put your heart out and go
into the role play because sometimes maybe your partner it
will take them a while to get into it with you.
Do you usually tell him that you're about to do
the role play, or you just jumping in and assuming
that he's going to figure it out. I say, I'm oh, hell,
(17:30):
I'm the tour manager from Encinc. You know me, and
let's get going and then um, sometimes usually like he
will push me out of bed, or shut the door
on me, or or try and hide in the closet. Yeah,
those are those seem to be pretty strong signals unless
now there's a possibility that he is role playing, and
(17:53):
that he's role playing as J. C. Chaz A, role
playing as a prison guard or a big motorcycle brute. Okay,
you know, and that you are not aware of the
next level of role play that he is doing, like
he might be playing three dimensional role played chess with
(18:14):
you and you're still playing checkers. My honey, whoa, I
haven't even considered that. I mean that day is again
why you are the expert. That wasn't pretty crazy if
I was getting three D chess played. Even if that
is happening and he is actually incredibly plot driven, I
still how about the surgery though, I want my surgery
(18:37):
for him? And how much have you looked into how
much this surgery might cost? I think it's upwards of
seventy five thousand dollars, but probably a closer. Yeah, probably
a lot higher than that. I think that was on
the cheaper end of this place I found in Chino.
But um, all right, you might want to consider other countries.
(18:58):
That's a good idea. Yeah, I'm you could kind of
fold a vacation into it and sort of make a
whole thing. Now what I think is actually happening here.
If you want to know my take on it, he's
playing almost impossible to get. You need to if he's
playing three D chess with you, you need to play
(19:18):
for D or five D chess with him, and you
need to basically create a scenario where what I'm basically
saying is you should either kidnap him or take him
on vacation and while you're there get the surgery through
some you know, through some I don't want to say
(19:39):
tricky means, but through some playful role playing means. Yeah. Yeah,
you could create a scenario where when you're in I mean,
I know, Vietnam is a place where you could go
to get some of the stuff done. Thailand is a
place where you could go to get some of the
stuff done. Yeah. Yeah, I did a little bit of research.
We found a place for them in Peru and it
(20:00):
was a very similar situation um and we actually wound
up as part of the whole package deal. The doctors
themselves actually pose as drug cartel members. Yeah, and then
you can sort of like it's a it's because it's
kind of fun too, because it's it takes a role
playing to the next level. They you know, put you
(20:20):
through a little bit of a car chase, corner you
in an alley, they would pretend to knock you out. Yeah,
it's like a video game. Yeah exactly. And then he
and then you kind of see like, well, what's gonna happen.
Is my boyfriend gonna play along with this? Is he's
going to put up a fight? Is he going to
quickly fold? So you get to learn a little bit
about them too, bing bang boom. Next thing you know, uh,
you guys are back state side. You know, he's probably
(20:44):
been asleep for two three weeks. Take off the bandages.
Looks exactly like j C. Chaz A. Damn, I knew
you would have all the solutions. This is why I
always listen to That's Crazy. Yeah, because you know, we've
had on a dating app and he said on there,
he said looking for a girl who loves adventure, and
(21:06):
so like, I know that he actually wants this, he
just doesn't really know it, and like, only someone like
me who loves him, so much would do this and
pay for it. I mean, even though I am a
very rich woman, it is expensive. Now, let me just
to be clear. Has he ever said the word no
(21:28):
to your request to have him change his face to
look like J. C. Chaz A from in Sync? Yeah?
I know. He said that very very clearly, and he
said no. If you ask me that again, I'm going
to freak out. And he said, um, that's extremely insulting
that you would need another face to be in love
(21:49):
with me like that type of thing. Right, So he's
really playing the long game on this one. The game
is a foot so to speak. It's a it's a
it's a it's a war of wits at this point
between you and he, is it not? It's seeming more
and more like that now that you say that, and
and now that I'm seeing it from your fresh expert eye,
that feel like I can really turn up the high
(22:13):
to high gear, you know, right. So I think at
this point you need to start putting the onus back
on him right down? Okay? Good onus is O n
U S. Let's be very careful with that word. I
think you want to drop the subject and never bring
it up again, you know, for a while until we
(22:35):
get to the point, until we get to the end
game in a foreign country with like got a um
incredible resort, and then we go like kind of maybe
for a day trip, and things kind of take a turn. Yeah, exactly.
Maybe there's a maybe there's a local tour guide who
befriends you and seems it seems extremely congenial and unlike
(22:55):
the other people who are constantly trying to take advantage
of American tourists, he wants to show you the real whatever.
Right next thing you know, you guys are driving down
a dirt road that you don't recognize. Things are starting
to get a little harry. A few other people on
motorcycles show up. The air condition goes out, air conditioning
goes out. He leaves the truck to go take care
(23:15):
of it, or maybe it's a bus of some kind,
and then on walk the paramilitary people who are actually
not paramilitary people that are actually nurses at the plastic
surgery facility. But he doesn't know this. But it's all
part of the game. It's all part of the game.
The only thing I would say is after if you
go through all of it, watch out for his next move.
(23:36):
You know, because whatever he has, he's he's he's not
going to be able to help. But appreciate how much
effort you put into this surprise, right, Yeah, I think
so cute. I think he's really going to come around
because like he doesn't see he is. But it's really
I'm doing this for him because what could be more
beautiful than looking like nineties Fox star j C shows it.
(23:59):
But here is the only issue that I see with this,
and this is literally the only issue. Can he also
bust a move in the same way j C could?
And if not, is that going to be a problem.
Do you want to go in to get a knee
surgery done at the same time? Um? Wha, I mean yeah,
this is why they pay you the big box because
(24:22):
I haven't really thought of that. Like, We've been playing
partner boc ball, and I have noticed he kind of
drags one leg a little bit, which really, um takes
me off. Yeah, I mean is that because of how
he's affecting your BOCY game or is it because it's
kind of ruining your image of perfection that you're trying
to project onto this guy, doctor Doctor, I'm not trying
(24:45):
to push any perfection on him. Other than just being
JC and think. But you know, when I'm out here,
we're trying to do our couples fun games, and this
dude can't keep up. I think also we need to
slip in a knee surgery, as you show apt Lee suggested. Now,
(25:09):
there is one issue I want to bring up, which is,
what if he's not actually involved in an elaborate game
of cat and mouse with you? And what if after
you go through all of this, you've done a terrible
disservice to him as a person, to the two of
you as a as a couple. And then also, you know,
committed a number of crimes. I mean, you've got to
(25:31):
have I think you have to have a bit of
an exit strategy there. I mean, what do you mean, like,
I'm not really committing any crimes. I think we all agreed.
I was just helping him, doing what's best for him.
I know, but sometimes people don't know when they're getting
the help that they need and they lash out. Um,
I don't really want anyone to bother me just because
(25:52):
I'm doing the right thing. But um, I guess I'm
going to roll the dice because you only live once.
But it Yeah, if anyone also comes after me, then
I don't know, there could be kind of like a
price to pay for them, right for them, Yeah, because
you're not someone who's going to forget any slight Right.
You didn't get to where you are by letting people
(26:13):
by living and let living you know, right? Did you know? No?
I was one of the richestle in California. Um, yeah,
I've had to step on a few next to get
where I am. But look, I mean it's gets stepped
on or step or gets stepped on, is what I
always say in in my ted talks. Now have you
have you made any of these requests with with previous
(26:34):
boyfriends anything similar? How has that gone? Um? I kind
of just made my last partner as many years ago,
just like dress up and go. I forced him to
go by the name j C. Chaz And was he
okay with that? At first? No, No, he was not,
But then he kind of just got used to it
(26:55):
because it's not a big deal, right, and also with
your money power, you know, an influence, it's like, what
is he going to do about it? Yeah? I said, sweetie,
it's okay, you're Jason. You are not You're j C.
Cha now, But I will buy you a tiger. And
did you buy that tiger? Yeah? Yeah, yeah? How much
do tiger's cost? Just out of curiosity, UM, this one
(27:16):
I think was like dollars wow. Yeah, and to you
that's nothing. Oh no, that's a penny in the bucket. Listen.
I gotta tell you, I think you're a hero, UM
for going after what you want. I think you're very accomplished,
uh person. And I can tell by the timber of
(27:37):
your voice that you're also a person who gets what
she wants. And I like that. I like that a lot. Yeah,
thank you. I'm going to send you a tiger, please
do so, I guess. Uh. The only other thing is,
you know, could you lend me forty dollars? UM? Yeah,
well maybe I might need you to do a few
(27:59):
things for me first, like what beyond just this incredible
advice and yeah, and I just want to reiterate and
thank you so much for this advice. I've been listening
for so long, like basically your entire time on UM.
But I would if I can also request this offline too.
But I was wondering if I could just have UM
(28:22):
one of your ears for the forty dollars because I
just wanted like a token because I am such a
huge fan. Odd to me, how premeditated that sounds from
something that seemed like a kind of a spontaneous transaction.
But yet again, you're the master and I'm the king.
(28:43):
So we're going to meet somewhere in the middle. Oh yeah,
just a friendly thing, you know. Well, Donna, Um, I
want you to keep me up to date on how
this is going. And then yeah, I wish you the
best of luck. Thank you so much. I really appreciate
you really has some incredible ideas and advice, and I
really feel, you know, soothed and comfortable with my choice
and decision. Now good great, um off air. Uh, my
(29:06):
producer Shelley will give you my routing number. Okay, no problem,
I'll send over my guy your guy. Well, I dread that,
but I do thank you for your call, Donna bessek
uh and uh yeah, please tell your friends, all right,
thank you so much, Okay, goodbye bye. Every once in
(29:29):
a while you get somebody on the air who uh
is true to themselves, true to their heart, knows what
they want and will stop nothing to get it. And
I have to say I admire that as a coward
and as a mid range celebrity. This is the Doctor
Sex re Show. I'm your host, Dr Robert sex Reese.
Today's topic is scars were two for two and I
(29:51):
would say right now, yeah, this episode probably just got
bumped up to a solid B. Let's take him inute
here to hear from one of our sponsors on The
Doctor sex ri Show. This is the best of Space
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(30:11):
on space fails dot com, but now you can watch
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Twitter continues to inform a muse and in flame. This
(30:34):
week in Twitter takes on the week's creamy US tweets
and read them on the air. Who reads them yours truly?
He's a tweet from a cat named Chris who's in
charge of naming now berries tu berry, BlackBerry raspberry, do
(31:00):
get very hashtag try again. That's this week in Twitter
from eight to eleven am every Monday. This is the
Doctor Sex re Show. I'm your host, Dr Robert sex Reest.
Today's topic is scars. I have our next caller on
(31:24):
the line, Jordan's Jordan's You're on with Dr Sex Reese.
That's me, Hi, doctor. Well, I'll just I'll just jump
right into it. As a teenager, I went into a
haunted house with a friend on a dare and that
night lost my virginity in the haunted house and um,
during a real haunting. Yeah, what I believe to be
(31:46):
a real haunting. I mean, I know some people believe
in this stuff and some people don't. And I don't
want to like push my you know, agenda on anybody,
but yeah, I believe it to be to be an
authentic haunting. And that has kind of affected my adult
sex life because now I can't I can't climax or
I can't I can't come unless I am unless I'm terrified. Yeah,
(32:13):
and I would like to, you know, find a way
to have sex without being scared. Do they have them
put on a scary mask? Are you? Are you playing
scary music? What? Yeah, it's it's it's it's escalated over
the years. I mean obviously, as a you know, in
my younger days, you know, it was fairly mild. I
you know, would just ask partners. If it was okay,
(32:35):
if I, you know, put on a spooky Halloween sound
effects tape, I don't know if you remember those from
childhood on tapes and c D s. No, wow, okay, Um,
how's a sound on CD A little crisper. But there's
something about the warmth of a cassette tape that I
just am partial to. But yeah, but kind of started
(32:55):
out like that that was fairly mild. And now you know,
I'm a I'm a thirty eight year old halt and
and it just it takes more to get me off.
I mean sorry if that that's a little bit crass.
But now I need a you know, I need to
be doused with a hose that shoots blood. I need to,
(33:16):
you know, see my dead mother's head in the mirror
when I closed the medicine cabinet during sex, during sex. Yeah,
the degree of horror that I need to ejaculate is frankly,
it's not it's not sustainable. Give me some of the
details about about the night that you lost your v
(33:38):
V word in this haunted house. What's the setting set
the stage for me? Sure? I mean, well, I grew
up in a small town in Maine, and um, you
know there was a really colorful history. There were a
lot of you know, like factory fires and you know
mill fires and witch burnings and you know circuses that
(33:58):
burned down, and you know, so obviously you know, as
as as a kid, you know, one of the rights
of passages, you know, spending the night in a haunted structure. Um,
you know, an old mill about house right, a mental
hospital men silent, yeah, an old prison, all these all
these work. And so you know, as as a kid,
(34:20):
I spent the night with a with a with a
friend at a in a in a house that you
know they called the Old sat Or White Place, and
you know, we went through a supernatural ordeal there that
culminated in us having sex. And it's kind of just
been part of my DNA ever since. So the Saturn
(34:41):
White Place itself, what was it? Was it a father
who went crazy and killed his whole family? Was it
bride left at the altar who killed everyone who came
to the wedding? And you can still, you know, see
her in her wedding dress. While you were having sex,
you spotted the ghost bride or we well, we fought,
we fought with the ghost bride um in the attic
(35:03):
and we we were able to to force her through
a portal to a hell dimension. Okay, and then my
my friend and I we had sex with each other.
And as I was climaxing, the bride's hand reached back
through the portal and grabbed my my hooded sweatshirt and
(35:25):
I was able to wriggle out of it as the
portal was, you know, sucking the hand back in. But yeah,
it really just changed everything for me. I think you
got to go back to the original scene where you
lost your virginity. But I think the most important thing
is that by the end of it, you need to
burn the old, sadder white place down, just like kill
all evidence of this ever having happened, because then you
(35:48):
can actually, especially if you do, rekindle a relationship with someone.
And the two of you were looking into each other's
eyes as the as the reflection of the fire glimmers, right,
and maybe we kind of slowly start to join hands
as were watching the as we're watching the house burn. Yeah,
and with it your your trauma and your pain. You know,
(36:09):
that's something you could do. I guess here's a concern
is that, um, you know, like obviously burning down that house,
um is easier said than done. Well, this is the
other thing I wanted to ask you about, and I've
I've been a little I've been a little wary to
do it because you're obviously emotionally raw. But what do
you know about this bride that you pushed back into
(36:30):
the into the hell dimension? Is there anything? Is there any?
Could it possibly be the case that when she was
reaching out of that portal to grab you is because
she cared about you? Oh? Boy? Um, I don't know.
I mean I was just sixteen, so I mean obviously
it's be a little bit problematic, But I mean, you
know that's yeah, that's that's true. A lot of life
(36:54):
experience under your belt, and you probably know what you
want a lot more than you did when you were sixteen.
You know, if she can get past the whole being
pushed into the hell dimension thing, um, you know, if
she's like you said you were six she she made
mistakes too, that's true. She did kill everyone at her wedding.
If you can reopen the hell portal and get down
in there, maybe I don't know, Maybe you're just maybe
(37:17):
you're just the man she's been waiting for and and
maybe she's what you've been looking for all this time.
I guess it's possible. I mean, you know, it would
get my motor going. Tell your boss you're taking a
four day weekend, Get in the car, put on some
Genesis and dry like Phil Collins Genesis. Yes, the two
(37:39):
of you may wind up living forever in the hell dimension,
and then then you have all the time in the
world to figure this stuff out. Do you think I
would be happy in the hell dimension? Are you happy? Now?
Oh boy, that's a big question. Um, I mean not
as happy as I could be. I'll be I'll be
perfectly honest with you. Yeah. I mean again, my my
job pays the bills, but it's it's not my path.
(38:00):
And I'm in publishing. I work for a small press
that does mainly kind of cookbooks and bartending guides and
things like that. Um. Yeah, nobody's buying books anymore, you know. No. Yeah,
well we do a pretty good e book business honestly.
But it's something you could talk to her about. I'm
sure she doesn't even know what the internet is. Yeah,
I guess I could tell her about modern times and
she can scream in your face. It sounds pretty nice.
(38:23):
So keep me, keep me in the loop, keep me updated,
let me know if you're able to. You know, I
don't know if you might wind up in this hell
dimension if all goes well, but uh, yeah, I wish
you the best Jordans I think thanks, Yeah, I know
you really, Yeah, you really have an ear for this stuff,
you really like Um yeah, you really. I feel like
took the words right out of my mouth and a
lot of a lot of occasions. So thank you very much.
(38:45):
Another satisfied customer. Um and uh, I'm sure there's hundreds
of you out there who have had similar experiences and
are dealing with a very similar issue. Hopefully this provided
some guidance for you too, whether it's a whether it's
a fisherman who haunts your town, or a pirate ship
(39:07):
under your city, or giant worms, whatever the case, maybe
I wish you all the best of luck. Thank you
very much. Well, we're at the end of the show,
and I gotta say, other than that perennium thing about
the scar at the top of the show, Jeff f
and his bull crap did not come up once. That's
a win. It actually felt kind of good to help
(39:29):
Jordan there. Thanks to everyone for listening. Keep your mind opening,
your eyes closed. As The Doctor sex Rees Show I
have been your host, Dr Robert sex Reese. Make sure
(39:58):
to rate, review, and subscribe to The Doctor sex Risho
wherever you listen to your favorite podcasts
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