5 Things You've Never Done

In the spirit of New Year, New You, put aside resolutions and instead make a list of new activities to add fun and adventure to your 2021

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:02):
Welcome to the Gratitude Diaries, a production of My Heart Radio. Hi.
I'm Janie Kaplan. Thanks for joining me for more practical
ideas on how to be happier. Today's tip make a
list of five things you've never done that you'd like
to do this year, and then get started. In the

(00:25):
many years I spent as a TV producer and then
a magazine editor, the first week in January had only
one theme, New Year, New You. It was as if
the ball dropping on New Year's Eve didn't just change
the calendar, it's somehow transformed your whole personality. This year,
I'm seeing that even more than usual. It's as if

(00:46):
we all want to be someone different than we were
last year. I'm all for new beginnings, but it might
help to think about what we're really trying to change.
A lot of resolutions are about why you're not quite
good enough. You want to lose weight, you want to
exercise more, and maybe you want to work harder. All

(01:07):
of those are reasonable, but they come from a negative perspective.
They suggest you've failed before by overeating or getting too slothful,
but this time maybe you can be better. That explains
why most resolutions don't last, we don't become completely new people.
So I think a better approach to the new year,

(01:28):
new you, is a positive one. Who would you like
to be in the coming year? What is going to
make you happy and excited? My birthday comes just a
couple of days after New Year's. In fact, it's today.
I'm not much for birthday celebrations, but every year since
I was in my early twenties, I made a list

(01:50):
of what for me is the double start of a
new year. My list was always ten things I've never done.
It meant, of course, ten things things I've never done
that I'd like to do. It's been long enough now
that most of the things I started out with have happened.
I've done them. I got married and had children, both

(02:11):
of which were on those early lists. I learned to ski,
when scuba diving, and climbed in the Swiss Alps. I
never went skydiving, which was on the list for a while.
I guess I never really wanted to. Making a list
of things you've never done makes you think in a
more realistic way about what you would like to do.

(02:31):
It also makes it more likely that you'll accomplish those things.
A study some years ago followed twelve thousand people for
twenty years, starting when they first began college. The initial
questionnaire had the students use a four point scale to
rank how much they cared about certain things, including money.

(02:51):
It turned out that people who put a high priority
on being rich when they were young were more likely
to do well financially as they got older. In fact,
for every extra point they had given on the money
important scale, they were making the equivalent of an extra
twenty two thousand dollars per year. It's not that wishing
makes it so, but when you're very clear with yourself

(03:14):
on what you want, you're more likely to put big
efforts toward achieving the goal. I suspect that if the
questionnaire had asked how important it was to become apparent,
starring a TV show, become a computer expert, or volunteer
in Ghana, the results would have been very similar. Those
who ranked any of those options as high on their
list of things they wanted would be more likely to

(03:36):
achieve it than those not. As driven. Resolutions sometimes work
best if you let other people know about them. A
spouse or friend may be able to help you eat
better or encourage you to go out running with them,
But the list of things you've never done is really
just for you. It's a way of organizing your mind.
Focusing on what you care about. Knowing what you want

(04:00):
aunt and where you're aiming is really the key. The
grit and resolve and fortitude that come with being focused
and passionate make positive things happen. Once you've declared it
to yourself, you're more likely to direct energy and emotion
in the right direction. A lot of people like to
believe the magical idea that if you ask the universe

(04:21):
for something, it answers. If that's the case for you,
your universe pays a lot more attention than mind does.
I don't think the universe listens so much as that
are simple asking. Wanting something directs our attention, our energies,
and our efforts, and when we get what we've sought,
we're happy and grateful. So today, make your list of

(04:45):
things you've never done that you'd like to do this year.
Focusing on the possibilities ahead in a positive and grateful
way will make you more likely to get where you
want to go. Thanks for joining me. I'll be back
all week with more ideas on the new Year, New You.
Have a great day. The Gratitude Diaries is a production

(05:10):
of I heart Radio. The more podcasts from I heart Radio,
visit the i heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever
you get your favorite shows.