Proud Dad Moment

Hear every emotional moment as Chris recaps his son, Josh's big day.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:01):
This is the most dramatic podcast ever and iHeartRadio podcast.
Chris Harrison coming to you from the home office in Austin, Texas.
But just got back from Fort Worth and TCU graduation
where our son Joshua graduated from TCU from the Business School.

(00:26):
It was you know, it really wasn't overly emotional. This
is an interesting thing. I've been kind of grappling with this,
which is why I wanted to dive into this and
I want to maybe hear what all of you have
to say. When he graduated from high school, it really
hit me. We said goodbye to a lot of friends,
and everybody is kind of spreading out going, you know,

(00:48):
their separate ways to different colleges, and it felt like
a chapter was closing, And so is this. Clearly he's
done with school. I mean, eventually he may go to
business school and get his master's and all that. But
while this is the closing of a chapter, I oddly
felt great about the whole thing. It was a great

(01:09):
celebration with family. Everybody was there. Obviously LZ was with me,
my mom, my dad, my brother, nephews and cousins, and
my ex wife and her husband and her sister, and
so it was a huge family celebration and it was
fantastic because everybody just rallied around Joshua. It was all

(01:30):
about him, and we had a couple of just wonderful
family dinners where everybody gets together. Thankfully, knock on wood,
we were able to do that where we can all
be in the same room, we can all celebrate, we
can all love on each other and love on our kids.
And you know, our daughter Taylor just wrapped up her
sophomore year, and maybe that helps a little bit in
that I still have two years to hold on to

(01:52):
my baby, and I have two years of parents weekends
and football games and the revelry and everything that goes around.
You know, I already feel the weight of her graduation coming,
because it'll be here before you know it. You know,
she's just wrapped up sophomore, so two more years. But
with Joshua, you know, watching him walk across the stage,

(02:14):
watching him see his friends putting on the cap and gown,
it was a lot of just pride. I was really
proud of him. I was proud to be his dad.
I was proud of everything he achieved. It was the
culmination of a lot of work and effort, and it
didn't feel as heavy as I thought it was going to.
And you know, it's funny. I don't know. Maybe I

(02:35):
pre mourned because you know, I was at his last
lacross game and that hit me. I had tears in
my eyes. He had tears in his eyes. The whole
way home driving back to Austin, that three hour drive,
I was really heavy and melancholy after all that just
I think a lot. It was the first time I
was telling Lauren, I'm not a big nostalgic person in

(02:56):
that I don't look back a lot and say what if.
I don't look back and wish for the good old days.
I've always been a forward thinking, forward moving person. I
always think about what's next. I'm always excited about what's
next in life and business. I think that is the
optimistic person in me. I've always been very optimistic, and

(03:16):
so I've never really slowed down enough to say what
about the good old days? That lacrosse game was the
first time where I got nostalgic and I felt fifty two.
I felt how did I feel like? I just walked
off the field myself for the last time playing soccer,
and I'm sitting here watching my son do the same thing.

(03:40):
That was kind of the first nostalgic moment. Honestly, I've
had kind of in my life. And it's not that
I haven't thought back. You know, I've been to high
school reunions and I you know, have unfortunately buried my
old soccer coach from college. So I've had moments where
I've looked back. But there was something about that that
hit me. That graduation felt more celebratory and exciting, and

(04:04):
this launch of Joshua in his new life and he
is so excited. I think a lot of it comes
from him. You know, if you ever think that whatever
you're leaving is the is the high point of your life,
if you think you have peaked, I think that is
the issue. You know, if you think high school was
the best part of your life, and maybe you look

(04:25):
back and it is, but in the moment, I hope
it wasn't. I hope you think what's next will be
the best. It will always get better, you can always improve,
and even just change is different. And so I think
for Joshua, I get the excitement of he's moving into
his own place, he's starting his own life, and he's
you know, buying furniture and moving in this week and
starting that chapter and starting his new job, and all

(04:48):
of those things are exciting. And I remember how excited
I was when I was leaving Oklahoma City University and
I had just gotten my first job on air. I
worked at KWTV, CBS affiliate in Oklahoma City. So for
all your parents out there who you know have a child,
moving on to that next chapter, and it really doesn't
matter you know what that chapter is. You know, kindergarten

(05:12):
into grade school and middle school and high school. You know,
every chapter is just different and emotional to a certain degree.
Uh there. You know, as I look back again, you
you only know what you know at the time. And
Lauren and I have these these deep discussions as you

(05:32):
could probably imagine with l Z. But one of the
things that she picked up, I don't know where she
heard it, but it is maybe one of the best,
most important lessons I had learned as a parent and
as a child, And it's about parents, and the saying
is it's their first time too. It's your parents first

(05:56):
time being a parent, which means give them a break,
have a little grace, have a little compassion for your parents.
I know there is some idea that we are supposed
to have it all figured out just because we're older
and technically we're wiser. Yes we are, we've had more experiences.
But I'm experiencing this for the first time. You know,

(06:18):
when my son graduated middle school, that was the first
time I had somebody graduate middle school in my life.
Now I have my daughter, I've had it twice, which
is why, by the way, the second time is always different.
But you know, it's our first time too. It's my
first time being a parent. And I look at some
of my friends who are still at that phase of

(06:39):
their child is heading to high school or they're starting
to look at colleges, and so I try to advise them,
and I look back at my own angst and things like,
for example, if I was going to be a parent again,
which I'm not going to, but let's say I was
going to have Elsie and I were going to have children,

(07:00):
you know, the things I wouldn't have so much angst
and anxiety and stress over Little League and how good?
How good are they at sports? And you know, honestly
even school there are you know, I want them to
be educated, I want them to have good grades, but
I just wouldn't lose sleep over the little things, and
I wouldn't mind the little things so much. And even

(07:22):
getting into college, you know, there was so much stress
and angst over you know, where are you going to
go to school? Getting into school, getting into the right school.
And you know, it's funny now that it's over. I
am so grateful for Texas Christian University and the fact
that he chose TCU, and I think it's like a relationship, right.

(07:43):
I think it is important to find a school that
fits you, and it doesn't need to be a certain
type of school. It's just, you know, my best advice
for those parents that are searching, where do you see yourself?
You know, where does your child feel comfortable? Where do
they see their people? You know, where do you see

(08:04):
your tribe? That is what's important. Those are the places
where they will end up and not want to come
home in six weeks. I think sometimes we put our
own stuff on the kids as far as choosing the
right school and choosing the right path, and often we
need to get out of the way and allow them

(08:24):
to kind of find their way. Just give them the
roadblocks and the things to step on to get to
the next step and to keep moving forward. But when
I think of how much stress we put into trying
to pick college and getting there and all that, I
kind of I think maybe we shouldn't have been all
that stressed about all that. But I'm grateful that he

(08:45):
went to TCU. It was such a good home. It's
now still the home for my daughter for the next
couple of years. And I also think the fact that
I do have I'm not a complete empty nester yet.
You know, I have one graduated, but we still have
our daughter at TCU, so I still get those two
more years. And I think the fact that I haven't
had that moment yet, and again this is my first

(09:06):
time for those of you listening that where your kids
have both graduated or they've all graduated and it was
the end of that time in your life. I know,
I still have to move my daughter in. I know
I still have to go to parents' weekends. Or I
shouldn't say I have to. I get to I get
that privilege of joining her, and so the finality of

(09:28):
that isn't over, which probably gave me a little reprieve
on the emotion with my son. I'm able to just
kind of enjoy because I still get to see Taylor there.
Because I've thought long and hard about why I wasn't
more emotional after the graduation this weekend, because I really

(09:49):
thought it might hit me more, And there were some
times I'm not gonna lie, you know, I teared up
just things that hit me. There were moments that hit
me at you know, with my mom and dad being there.
And I think, also, I'm a I'm a caretaker and
a facilitator, and I plan a lot of this stuff,
and I'm getting everybody hotel rooms and all this stuff,
and so I think in the moment, you're a little

(10:14):
bit detached because you're just trying to make sure everybody's
taken care of. And so maybe maybe it will settle
in a little later and hit me a little harder.
But right now I'm kind of just basking in the
glow of being so grateful and so happy for him
and so proud. I was thinking of something else the

(10:42):
other day, and before I leave you, I want to
I want to hit on this. Some people have asked,
you know, what is the secret to raising kids? And
you know, there's tons of podcasts, there's tons of books,
and I will say this. I don't have it all
figured out. Nobody does. No, no, no parent has it
all figured out. And the reason they don't is no

(11:05):
child is the same. You know, what worked on my
son does not work on my daughter. What works on
my daughter does not work on my son. You treat
them differently. They are different humans completely their emotions, their thoughts,
their feelings. But with that said, there is one thing
I was thinking about this the other day of like, Okay,

(11:27):
why are both of our children great human beings? They're successful,
they're smart, they're doing well in school. What has kept
them on that path of success? And how I define success,
by the way, is just being a good person, most

(11:49):
importantly being a good citizen, being a good human, caring,
having empathy, having love for others, gracious, educated, thoughtful, mindful,
And they check all those boxes and then some. And
so to me, they are unbelievably successful. And I think

(12:10):
the word that stuck out the most to me as
I see my son take this step and continue his
life accountability and not just accountable to you, the mom
or the dad, but I see them accountable to others.
When when we had our gathering for graduation, we are
fortunate enough that we have two grandparents. My mom and

(12:31):
dad are still alive. Their cousins were there, their cousins
wives were there, they were others, friends, and so I
always thought it was important in my life of why
I was successful is I was accountable to others, my parents,
my brother. I never wanted to let my brother down,

(12:52):
my grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, whoever it is. I felt
like I had to answer to them. I felt like
they were always watching. What would they say if I
had to go tell them what I did? And sometimes
if I really screwed up when I was a kid,
my parents would make me tell my grandparents, which was

(13:13):
a fate worse than death. But I felt like I
was able to give that to my kids, pass that
on because let's face it, you know, my kids didn't
struggle in their life. They knew where their next meal
was coming from. They grew up with a house over
their head. So how do you keep that hunger no

(13:35):
matter where you grow up and how you grow up,
how do you keep the hunger and that thirst for
knowledge and to strive to be successful? It's accountability. I
think that's what I'm narrowing it down to. As I
think about it all, and I've given a lot of
thought over the last week or so after graduation. Is
Josh is accountable to me, to his mom, to Lauren,

(14:01):
to his stepdad, to his cousins, brothers, sisters. Knowing that
you have to answer to all of us, and knowing
you would have to tell us what you did if
you did wrong, I think keeps you on that path,
and it doesn't make It doesn't mean you won't make mistakes,
but it will also mean that when you do make mistakes,

(14:23):
you're accountable. Even when I went through what I went
through a post bachelor and with all the bachelor stuff,
I sat with Lauren and my daughter and my son
at the dinner table and answered questions and allowed them
to be blunt and honest, and we talked about everything

(14:43):
and owning everything. And it didn't matter to me as
much to be accountable to the rest of the world
and social media because I don't no offense, don't know
ninety nine point nine percent of the people out there.
But to those people around the dinner table that night
and subsequent dinners that mattered to me. I had to

(15:04):
be accountable to them. And so accountability is huge. And
if I could ever impart any wisdom to a parent.
Keep your children accountable, don't make it easy on them
to do wrong, don't make it easy for them to
let them off the hook. You know, they have to

(15:25):
answer to somebody, And sometimes it's a parent, if you're
lucky enough to have parents, a grandparent, but it can
also be a mentor a coach, a teacher. And if
you don't have someone in your life, try to seek
that out. Try to seek out people who keep you accountable.
I really do think that is a massive part of
the reason why both my kids want to achieve their

(15:50):
own path and achieve their own greatness whatever that is.
And I'm not just talking about money. Whatever that means
to you. Achieving that and wanting to achieve that is important,
and I think when you're accountable to others, that is
part of it. Thank you so much. It uh, it's
it's it's wild to get to this point in your

(16:12):
life where you know kids are are are moving on.
And my relationship with Joshua will no doubt change, it
already has to a large degree. Our conversations are different,
My advice is different. It is real world stuff. It
is money and insurance and you know, down payments on
stuff and you know, think they you know, the basics

(16:35):
of life. Now that I get to impart, I am
so thankful that I'm here for it. HM. Didn't plan
on getting emotional with you today. I guess I should
have planned on it with this. But you know, when
I think of Lauren, and you know, her dad didn't

(16:59):
have the opportunity that I do, and I think of
him often in these situations. Gary, I think of Elsie's
dad because he and his mom, Donna, they did the
hard work, They pushed their children, they held them accountable.

(17:21):
Lauren is so accountable to others in her family and
in her life, and still accountable to her dad. But
I am sorry that he doesn't get to enjoy the
spoils of that and have that friendship that I know
he would have with Lauren. And so when I sit
there at about the same age that he passed away,

(17:43):
and I think how grateful I am that I got
to sit in that auditorium and watch Joshua graduate, And
every day I realize is so blessed that I get
to enjoy the fruits of my labor. And we use
labor with a loose term because it's yes, yes, it

(18:05):
is work being a parent, but it's it's a it's
a love right. But the fact that I get to
enjoy these things, it's not lost on me that I
get to enjoy every day and I get to watch
him move in and if the Good Lord has will
bless me a little bit longer, hopefully I will get
to see them be married, and hopefully, if it's in
the cards, grandchildren, and you know, each of those monumental moments,

(18:29):
and I think of Lauren, who doesn't get to have that.
And I know there's others out there who don't, you know,
and we just went through Mother's Day, And if you
don't have that, I feel for you. But I hope
you will also be grateful for the work that was
put in when they had that time, and be grateful
for the moments that we do get to enjoy, because

(18:51):
life is short. It's all too short, and we are
reminded of that all the time. So I will enjoy
this season and I will breathe it all in and
know that there will be another season coming. And I
appreciate each and every one of you so much. I
love you, and I will talk to you again soon
because we have a lot more to talk about. Thanks
for listening. Follow us on Instagram at the most Dramatic

(19:13):
pod ever, and make sure to write us a review
and leave us five stars. I'll talk to you next time.