The R Spot with Iyanla

Iyanla dives deep into sibling and parental relationships in an episode with a single caller who is having a breakdown with her “Guardian.” The caller, a 29-year-old woman was raised by her older sister after their mother died at a young age. Now, the caller resents her sister for the way she was raised – with physical and emotional abuse that led to a combative adult relationship. Iyanla’s caller isn’t sure if she has a mother/dau...

Two callers seek Iyanla’s guidance this week, each looking for the answer on whether to stay or go in their relationships. The first woman has recently been betrayed by her husband for the second time, and she’s not sure if she can go through the heartbreak again. The second caller, a woman who continuously breaks up and gets back together with her partner feels as though she’s only sticking around for one thing: the sex. So Iyanla...

When a young woman calls in search of help finding her place in the world, Iyanla shares a personal story that sparks an idea – Maybe what’s missing today is a type of Auntie guidance where the past generations share their knowledge and experiences with young women. So, Iyanla shares her wisdom with the first caller, a woman who feels unhappy in her current life path. Then, Iyanla dives deep into what it means to mother with a seco...

This week, Iyanla explores the idea of the broken parts of ourselves that everyone holds inside them, yearning for what they never got as children. Iyanla’s first caller is a woman who feels like she can’t heal the broken parts inside of her, even though she can recognize that there’s a problem. And the second caller desperately wants to be able to love and take care of her mom, who is ill, but can’t seem to show the love she’s alw...

When a struggling young man calls in with issues surrounding his own identity, Iyanla finds a way to get to the core of the issue. Her caller today feels like he’s constantly held down by his mother and sister, who diminish him as less of a man. Unfortunately, he’s financial dependent on his mother, and feels more like her emotional partner rather than her son, so isn’t sure how to stand up and be his own person. Iyanla helps guide...

Iyanla noticed a pattern – whether it’s socks or a pair of pants, what she puts inside the wash is exactly what she gets back out. So when two struggling callers share their experiences with Iyanla, she decides it’s time to look at what they’re putting into their relationships from the start. The first woman feels like she’s putting her all into every romantic relationship she’s had, but when she finally lets her guard down, the lo...

In an episode all about shifting your perspective, Iyanla’s caller this week feels as though she’s the black sheep of the family, and can’t have a good relationship with her brother. After years of being mistreated and told she is always wrong, the caller is still afraid that if she lets go of the relationship, it may never heal. But to help guide the guest on the journey of acceptance, Iyanla shares a very personal story about her...

When two callers join Iyanla for conversations about their problems with family, Iyanla gets to the heart of the issue: Both women are dealing with learned behaviors where they put everyone else’s happiness above their own. The first caller has given up her career, friends and her life across the country to move home and take care of her grandfather, when her mother and aunt live nearby themselves. The second caller believes she ha...

When two women share their on-the-rocks marriage problems, Iyanla tells them it’s time to admit what they already know. The first caller’s husband is blaming ADHD as a reason for a lack of intimacy, while the second woman’s husband sometimes ignores her for days at a time in their own home. Both women learn to pull up their big girl panties and confront the situations head on.
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This week, two callers are unsure if they should put up with behavior they’ve been unhappy with from their partners. The first guest feels like her partner has lied to her about being divorced, and that’s a huge no-no for her. Then, another caller believes her partner’s kids and ex-wife are the problem in her relationship, but Iyanla thinks the issue is with her judgement of the situation. Iyanla guides both callers to learning how...

Iyanla says that sometimes one of the hardest things to do is to accept that people can come from toxic roots, and that it’s their job to uproot the toxicity. This week, two sisters join Iyanla for an extended episode where they share their own family traumas, ranging from emotional to physical abuse. Now, as adults, both sisters want to figure out how to have a relationship with their toxic parents, who they consider narcissists a...

Iyanla shares the story of her estranged relationship with her sister, which changed her view of every woman who enters her life. So when two women call in with breakdowns in relationship with their own sisters, Iyanla is ready to listen. The first caller recently learned that her and her sister had different biological fathers, but she doesn’t know how to bring it up to her sister for fear of her sister feeling disconnected from t...

In a powerful and hopefully-enlightening episode, Iyanla speaks with a father who was former military, and is now struggling with a divorce. He’s worried that his two adult children weren’t given a good life and may end up resenting him for his choice to leave their mother, even though it was best for him. Iyanla finds the real core of the issue and helps the caller, and maybe more listeners out there, learn to understand that men ...

This week, two callers have set themselves up for experiencing exactly what they don’t want in their relationships. One caller is dating a man who has a son, while she doesn’t ever want children – yet she believes the issue is with her partner. The second caller is considering returning to a toxic relationship because of the pressure from her children and her ex. Iyanla recognizes the issue in both situations – each caller believes...

Two callers this week believe their problems are in their current situations – one who is a self-proclaimed people pleaser, and the other, a returning caller who can’t seem to make progress in fixing her life. However, Iyanla notices that they’re both dealing with scattered thoughts. Both callers have been traumatized and must ask for the help they need to heal.

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Iyanla believes that a betrayal of trust by a family member can be one of the most difficult relationships to heal from, but also one of the most beneficial. And two callers this week have detailed stories of betrayal to share on their paths toward healing. One caller had the police called on her after she exposed her sister’s cheating husband. And a second caller has always had contention with her three sisters, whom she now hasn’...

Iyanla takes a look at the other side of the parent/child relationship, with two callers whose mothers still treat them like children. The first caller feels like he had to become the emotional support for his mother after his father died, which created an unhealthy relationship. Then, a second caller wants to have some relationship with their mother, but can’t seem to set boundaries like an adult. Iyanla guides both callers toward...

Iyanla classifies a relationship as lasting for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. In this week’s episode, callers share stories of returning to a relationship for a second (or third, or fourth) time – something Iyanla calls “Double Dipping.” One caller continuously returns to a man who disappears from her life for long periods of time, while another caller believes second chances never work in romantic relationships as it’s only l...

This week’s callers think there are no more good, single men out there. One woman is only attracting men who take and never give in the relationship, and now she measures her relationships as a transaction. Then, the second caller believes she’ll never find what she wants in a partner, and because of that ends up finding men who leave her. Iyanla takes it all the way back to the root, diving into each callers’ belief systems (B.S.)...