August 13, 2025 • 41 mins
Regrets Only. We all have regrets. And some of those regrets have made us rage, and some of that rage, we now regret (but not all of it.) We'll tell you all about our regret rage on this week's episode of The Rage Pod.
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Do you remember when he was more?
Speaker 2 (00:02):
She just said it so flat, She's like, do you
know who Robin Williams was like, oh my air cut Erica.
I don't think I've ever seen that.
Speaker 3 (00:13):
So he was in good Will the TV show.
Speaker 2 (00:15):
Yes he was. I didn't know he was actually the
actually Genie and Aladdin. He was so good in that role.
Is the fact that that movie was ever recreated is
beyond me? Wait has it come out yet?
Speaker 3 (00:36):
It was the live action Will Smith was the Genie.
Speaker 2 (00:38):
Oh yeah, I didn't.
Speaker 4 (00:39):
I'm like Will Smith, but he's not just good at
slapping people. He is also like talented. But like when
you have that epic of a performance that's also.
Speaker 2 (00:51):
Rage right there, just going right up on stage smacking somebody.
Speaker 4 (00:56):
Oh yeah, I mean that is literally like that's like
the literal.
Speaker 3 (01:00):
Definition of right. I mean raging out of raging out.
Speaker 2 (01:04):
And Dad is where I think when we were discussing
it was a great call. I'm here with you. Your
(01:28):
name's Ebar, and we're doing the rage Pod.
Speaker 3 (01:30):
We're doing the Rage Pod.
Speaker 4 (01:31):
I am here with Tara Erickson, and we rage against
the Serene and all the things in.
Speaker 2 (01:36):
Between, everything in between. There's so much to rage about.
But today, what are we talking about. We're going to
talk about something that we've experienced, okay, because we're here,
But you can't. You can't pretend like you haven't because
we all have. We've all had regret. Yeah, we've all
had regret, and then we've also all had sort of
(01:57):
rage regret. Right, we regret about raging like you, you
don't have.
Speaker 4 (02:03):
Just got to make adjustment, everybody. Keep that in the edit.
Speaker 2 (02:06):
Please call me. Keep that in the She was holy
laptop on her knees and was like, wait, real, true story.
We learn this and podcasting this is it's.
Speaker 3 (02:17):
A oh yeah, a double fist, double fist.
Speaker 2 (02:20):
Which sounds so now here I'm podcasting and at the bar. Yeah,
that's how we roll.
Speaker 3 (02:25):
Oh I went porn you went drinking.
Speaker 2 (02:26):
Great, I mean that's how we roll. That is right,
the FFS forever. Unless this podcast tears us apart through
all our pornography and all of our drinking, we are
together together. Well, what I was going to say is
that you know, people are likely with no regrets. I
don't have any regrets. That's why I'm like, don't even
(02:48):
try to play like you have zero regrets in life,
Like give it up already.
Speaker 4 (02:52):
You've got it. Listen, you've got it. You're walking around,
you're breathing, You've.
Speaker 2 (02:55):
Got it, exactly. And that's the thing is like, right,
we shouldn't be so like scared of this idea that like, oh,
if we regret, that makes us a less than person
or like we're failing at life. Like so that's that's
just And by regretting you learn things that you can
do differently in the future. But if you just like
suppress that, just like if you suppress.
Speaker 4 (03:17):
Anger, then maybe you just repeat the same patterns over
and over because you're just like, oh, I'm like a
horse in Central Park. I've got blinders on and I
just keep walking forward.
Speaker 2 (03:27):
Exactly. So I feel like we're here to kind of
like to stigmatize it. Yeah yeah, yeah, Like it's okay,
like feel the regret and then if you feel it,
then you get to move on and then again not
repeat that cycle. I mean, it's tough when you buy
a pair of pants that you hate, you.
Speaker 4 (03:41):
Know, I mean I just thought a pair of pants,
you guys, I was so excited about this pair of pants.
I was like they marketed it like it was this
cool vintage denim, and I was like, I'm gonna look
so fucking cool in this spring, summer season.
Speaker 2 (03:58):
Whatever we're in and they're weird.
Speaker 3 (04:00):
They're fucking weird.
Speaker 4 (04:01):
Yep, they look like like thin curtains. I thought it
was getting denim. I got like thin curtains, like not
blackout curtains. Yeah, online regret, online buyers remorse absolutely, but
here look look.
Speaker 3 (04:16):
I mean, granted they're ill fitting.
Speaker 4 (04:18):
It's like I swiped right and they were much different
from their photo totally. But like in the future, I'm
not gonna just go hog wild click happy on an
online flash sail.
Speaker 2 (04:29):
No, you won't, because I've done that. And I just
got a shirt the other day from Timu, and I know,
shout out to t it's always me and thearly word
did you get out of my Temu? But like, I
got this shirt and she's like her pants thin satin. Mine.
Then it was like a shirt and I thought it
was going to be thick, thin satin, and then you
can't tell it's all colorful. Whacked it right right, But
(04:52):
then in the freaking corner right here, there's this heart
and it says God's love is all around.
Speaker 3 (04:56):
Oh no, you st a.
Speaker 1 (05:02):
It's not meant to be.
Speaker 3 (05:03):
You know what you need to do.
Speaker 2 (05:05):
You need to send tim the Boundary song and need
some space from your god patches. We'll close up zoom
on the god patch. Yeah, Like, don't just give me
this thing where it looks all color. I mean it
looks like this sweater dope. Right, you're not feel like
there's going to be this God's love?
Speaker 5 (05:22):
Is it?
Speaker 2 (05:22):
And it says it three times? And where does it
hit on your body? Does it hit on your hip?
It's low down, but it's also it's trying.
Speaker 4 (05:30):
To get you pregnant. It's trying to get you pregnant
because it's close. It's close to the ovary.
Speaker 2 (05:35):
And it's not just one, it's multiple. Exactly, I'm gonna
tell you exactly.
Speaker 3 (05:39):
They want you to have seven children at once.
Speaker 2 (05:44):
You got to give me a cunt of the week.
Speaker 3 (05:45):
We got to tease them with that.
Speaker 2 (05:46):
Oh, I got one for you, just a reminder. Count
of the week stands for courageous, unapologetic, notorious.
Speaker 3 (06:03):
Do you want a hint of your content?
Speaker 2 (06:04):
Yeah, you gotta give it to me. Let's go habit
ho a habit ho, like they're a whore with habits.
It sounds really, it just sounds disturbing.
Speaker 3 (06:20):
I'm just gonna go on, you will.
Speaker 2 (06:22):
You do not know who it is, so like I
but I do like I like this, like this curiosity. Yeah,
which means we have to throw it to for any
oneday because I'm trying to hear some Rage hotline stuff.
Give me the juice because I'm just gonna be sitting
here thinking about habit ho and I gotta get out
of that mindset.
Speaker 1 (06:40):
No no, no, no, no no, you've reached the Rage Hotline.
Please leave us a message.
Speaker 6 (06:46):
Okay, guys, this week we have two callers, so let's
go to the first caller.
Speaker 7 (06:53):
There has been one thing my entire life that has
sent me down such a spiral. I have felt my
chest tighten and be so filled with anger and disgust
at the same time. And it's when there is a
(07:17):
glob of toothpaste in the sink. Multitude of reasons.
Speaker 3 (07:23):
It's just gross.
Speaker 7 (07:24):
It's like someone else's spit and toothpaste in the sink. Disgusting.
You're looking at this disgusting thing while you have a
toothbrush in your mouth, so immediately gagging, immediately gross, gagging,
hate the sight of this second reason, I feel like
(07:45):
it's just this sense of carelessness when you are brushing
your teeth, you're looking into the sink to spit, you
are turning the water on. How are you not just
like brushing it down? I bought a brush that sits
next to my faucet so that you can wipe down
(08:06):
your sink after you're.
Speaker 5 (08:08):
Done using what because I'm so I remember my brother
that is doing this when I was seven or eight
and having the same exact response, and into adulthood.
Speaker 7 (08:20):
I'm thirty six now and it still bothers me. So
that's in my life that has caused rage since I
have been brushing my teeth and noticing the glob of
toothpaste on the sink.
Speaker 3 (08:36):
Yeah, she's got some toothpaste trauma.
Speaker 2 (08:39):
She really does, just like PTSD. Like I know, I
didn't realize you could talk that long about a glob
of toothpaste and his sink was the poetry. Now it's
ruined her life.
Speaker 3 (08:48):
That was a moth She she just won.
Speaker 2 (08:50):
She just won with that story. I'll tell you that.
But that is gnarly. You just you don't even need.
She gives it extra too. She has a brush for
a bra she's in your hand like a normal person,
and you wash it down.
Speaker 3 (09:06):
So here's where I'm at with this.
Speaker 2 (09:08):
It is just it is gross. But I think a
lot of people would feel like it's okay if that's
left there until I'm cleaning the sink. No, absolutely, you
do it. Oh my god.
Speaker 3 (09:26):
Disagree, hard disagree.
Speaker 2 (09:28):
I mean, I don't do it. But I'm just saying
I've seen it. I've seen it from other people. You
had me worried.
Speaker 3 (09:35):
No, I take the water, like you're saying.
Speaker 4 (09:38):
But I guess in the scheme of things that are
the most disgusting in a bathroom, that to me isn't
the headliner.
Speaker 2 (09:45):
I'm with you. You know what in bathroom, it's the
poop streak.
Speaker 1 (09:49):
Okay, we're moving on to the next one.
Speaker 3 (09:51):
Frendy Wendy. We just hit the sensitivity.
Speaker 2 (09:54):
But she does not like he just stepped and she's like,
I'm the producer here. She she hers, stomach turns.
Speaker 1 (10:01):
Let's roll the next one.
Speaker 8 (10:03):
Oh wow, Hi, rache Pod calling in because I'm raging
about every fucking person out there that has something to
complain about all the goddamn time. It's like, live your
fucking life. You hear your alive, you ain't fighting cancer,
you got kids lovely. Now just shut the fuck up,
stop complaining and just do your thing and be happy
that you're fucking yeah, okay, goodbye, all right.
Speaker 3 (10:26):
I have thoughts.
Speaker 2 (10:27):
I have thoughts.
Speaker 4 (10:27):
First of all, I'm sorry an Australian accent. Everything's funny,
the best.
Speaker 2 (10:31):
But also, yeah, you have less to complain about because
you are in Australia, or you are Australian. America has
a lot to complain. I don't know if he if
he probably he might live in in the US. And yeah,
but he can always go back. That's right, you can always.
He's got an escape route. You're right, you're right, But
(10:52):
I agree. I mean, there there's like people that I
that I work with or just you know, when you
have some friends and they're just like constantly complaining. Like
I used to tell you, you guys, when I you know,
with the long COVID stuff, I'm like, listen, I don't
want to talk about it. I'm sick and tired of
being sick and tired. I don't even want to discuss it.
I hate it. And then there are some people where
you're like, you have a house, you made great money,
(11:14):
You don't have kids. You built this business because you
wanted it, and now you could you could not complain, right, No,
I there's definitely like a point where it's become like
they can't stop. That's that's sort of like their their default.
(11:34):
It's just like instead of being like, oh, I'm comfortable
with you know, normal silences, let's just fill the space
with complaints. It's like a personality fault or something like
they feel it's like a tick, like you can't help it.
Speaker 4 (11:49):
Well, I heard this thing recently that I said to
friendy Wendy, this is how I know it might be
like a good thing to.
Speaker 3 (11:56):
Talk about you. Oh, because she was like, oh that
makes sense.
Speaker 4 (12:00):
Quality of life minus envy equals happiness. Hell yeah, So
you could have all the houses and all the well
not all the kids, all the houses, kids, whatever. You
found your soulmate and you got the car that you want.
But if you're still like envying some other person's life
that you don't have, guess what, probably not gonna be
(12:21):
very fucking happy.
Speaker 2 (12:22):
I agree, you have to. You have to really chalk
it up to being grateful, and you've got to remember, yeah,
that's stuff, you know, because it's like, you know me,
I'm like, oh, I just want a tiny house in
the valley with my two cats. Just let me have it,
Like she will not settle for a big house. It
has to be a tiny n It's got to be
tiny one because we know I'm not gonna live in
a big old house. I just want you know, I
(12:43):
want that. Then I have to remind myself, like I
live alone in a great studio with my two cats.
It's it's great, like you've got great friends. I've got
great friends. I got great friends with great places to
go and hang out.
Speaker 1 (12:54):
Co hosts.
Speaker 2 (12:55):
Great, I'll see where I going girl. Yeah, but no,
it's true. We have to be grateful. Well, the guy
that said it was like, look, do you know, like
it wasn't that long ago that people didn't have hot showers?
What like if you go back, like like how long
like the Thomas Edison date, like they didn't have hot showers?
(13:18):
What year was? I don't know? Asked me to n
eighteen hundreds, maybe nineteen fifty.
Speaker 3 (13:25):
Definitely not fifty. But wasn't it early nineteen? I don't know.
We need where's our fact checker?
Speaker 2 (13:32):
We don't have it. I was I feel sleep in history.
I feel like I'm taking that timeline quiz by New
York Times, which I do love, by the way. But anyways,
what I was saying is he says like, so sometimes
I'll be in the shower.
Speaker 3 (13:44):
And I was like, Hey, this is really cool. You
get to take a hot shower.
Speaker 2 (13:47):
It's true.
Speaker 4 (13:48):
I love that we understand everyone has their own specific
things that make them frustrated, and we see you.
Speaker 2 (13:54):
And we have to tell the people that you guys
got to get in on this Ray hot line, Like
we gotta tell them, that's right.
Speaker 3 (13:59):
What's the number two?
Speaker 2 (14:00):
Okay, it's two and three two nine three five nine
nine to fives. Give them the email.
Speaker 4 (14:05):
You can also email us, which I know is like
kind of weird, but we like it.
Speaker 3 (14:09):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (14:10):
The Ragepod at gmail dot com. That's the Ragepod at
gmail dot com. Either you're a teenager and you have
too much oil, or you're reaching menopause and all you want.
Speaker 2 (14:23):
Is oil because you lose it as you age.
Speaker 9 (14:26):
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It has seven mushrooms, it hydrates, it's full of nutrients.
Speaker 2 (14:39):
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Speaker 3 (14:42):
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Speaker 4 (14:45):
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Speaker 3 (14:50):
Okay, so we're back.
Speaker 2 (14:52):
We are, and today we are talking about regret rage.
It's like when you, you know, when you go into like
a meeting at work or something, and you think like,
oh God, I should I could have said that better.
I should have No, why why did I do that?
Why did I do that? I could have done this?
Like you're in the car, you're at home, You're like,
I what in the actual f And it can literally
(15:15):
take over your day or a week. Oh yeah, I
hate it.
Speaker 3 (15:18):
You just like repeat it in your mind. Yes, you know.
Speaker 2 (15:20):
It'd be like like, you know, we've all been through breakups, right, yeah,
And instead of just saying what you thought, like, hey,
you're an uncurable narcissist, so just saying that, you give
them a hug. And then you look back you're like, oh,
that was my moment to step into my power and
I gave him a fucking hug. Yeah, And then you
and then you not only are you like broken hearted
(15:41):
and sad, but then you're beating yourself up because you
regret how you handle the situation.
Speaker 3 (15:46):
That's a lot.
Speaker 2 (15:47):
I mean, you were nice, you give you give him
a hug.
Speaker 3 (15:49):
Well, this is kind of a hypothetical.
Speaker 2 (15:51):
I mean, I rank like you were like no, and
he'd and then you're like, well, I'll give you a
hug before I go. It's like, what I.
Speaker 3 (16:00):
Mean, don't you think that we all end up at
the very end?
Speaker 7 (16:03):
Do?
Speaker 3 (16:03):
I mean, I mean, it's a hug.
Speaker 1 (16:04):
Goodbot.
Speaker 4 (16:05):
I didn't like have someone break up with me and
say and then they said these awful things, and.
Speaker 2 (16:09):
I was like, here, give me a hug, Come on in,
come on in. There was one time I'll just say
it ain't a breakup and I went, you're right, I
do deserve better and walked out the door. Oh that's
so good. What Academy award.
Speaker 3 (16:24):
That's a mic drop moment.
Speaker 1 (16:25):
It was real.
Speaker 2 (16:27):
I was real proud of when I was driving my cars, like, absolutely,
no regret. You're a badass.
Speaker 4 (16:31):
That is very cool when you say the things that
you envision yourself saying. But at the same time, right, like,
we also shouldn't beat ourselves up if we if we
don't have this fucking like badass First Wives Club moment.
Speaker 2 (16:46):
Exactly, because like there are times like like that, how
you imagined that maybe it would go, that you would
want it to go. But then there's other times where
it comes out and it's freaking ugly, it's.
Speaker 3 (16:54):
Bad, or you get paralyzed. Like there's so many things
that happened.
Speaker 2 (16:57):
I think what that is, Like it comes down to
it's expectations, right, yeah, I expect it. Like, honestly, what's
the phrase the road to hell.
Speaker 4 (17:08):
Was paved with good intentions? I think the road to
hell was paved with impossible expectations. It's true because like
we have expectations of others and they don't meet them,
and then we're resempful. And then we have expectations of
ourselves and we don't meet them, and then we regret
it and we think about it over and over and over. Yeah,
there's a really good talk that a Ted, an actual
(17:29):
TED talk, not just like one that we're.
Speaker 3 (17:30):
Like, oh, that was a Ted talk.
Speaker 4 (17:32):
But this writer, Catherine Schultz, I'm not sure what she's
doing now. She's writing for The New Yorker at the time.
Speaker 3 (17:37):
She has this whole talk on.
Speaker 2 (17:39):
How regret is really is actually.
Speaker 3 (17:42):
Something that's of service to us.
Speaker 4 (17:44):
She breaks it down into denial, which is you do
something You're like, oh, I just please, like just make
it go away.
Speaker 3 (17:51):
Like maybe if I, like did I dream that?
Speaker 4 (17:53):
Or maybe if I just forget about it, it'll just
somehow have not happened. And then it goes into bewilderment
like how could that have happened?
Speaker 3 (18:01):
How could that have happened?
Speaker 4 (18:03):
And then the bewilderment is kind of what leads into
the self punishment of like, oh my god, I'm like
kicking I can't believe that that happened, And now that
I've kind of accepted that it's happened, I am kicking myself.
And then it goes into perseveration.
Speaker 2 (18:20):
Is it that like you're separating yourself from what you're hearing.
Speaker 3 (18:23):
It's like the word of the noun and persevering.
Speaker 4 (18:25):
Oh so it's more of the obsessive nature of like
the way she says it, it's that you say, make
it go away, make it go away, make it go away,
make it like you can't. It's the shame spiral of
like you just can't get out of, yeah, of obsessing
over wanting it to not have happened.
Speaker 2 (18:43):
I feel like that probably happens a lot with with cheating.
I started watching this show you guys know how is
called like cheat cheaters or something cheat cheat or they cheat.
I don't even know. It's ridiculous, so it's.
Speaker 3 (18:57):
But it's it's very nuanced.
Speaker 2 (19:00):
Exactly, And I feel like you'd have a lot of
that where people are in denial, right and then you
you punish yourself or you're in bill You're like, oh
my god, how did I do that? Like it didn't
mean anything, or you got caught up in it, and
then you punish yourself, and then I'm wondering, like persevere,
I guess would just be continuing the relationship or like.
Speaker 4 (19:22):
Like the persevering like obsession over making it want like
wanting it to stop. Oh I see, Like the perseveration
is the perseveration of the thought we're.
Speaker 2 (19:33):
Talking about brain spiraling, yes, like yeah, yes, okay, okay,
Well that's not I mean right, like, like how do
we get that?
Speaker 1 (19:42):
Well?
Speaker 4 (19:43):
I think it's it's you know, letting yourself feel it
and know that it's not going to be like that
forever anything else. But I think part of what happens
is we we try to not regret, and then then
the not regretting it lasts longer. Like you just you that, Okay,
I'm just going to package it up and move forward
and then then I won't ever have to regret it.
Speaker 2 (20:04):
It'll eat you up inside though, it'll come back come
at you. And they ask, Yeah, I did some research
and there's top ten commonness life regrets. To do it
I think is a lot of fun. So number one
is not pursuing your true passions or your dreams.
Speaker 4 (20:20):
I think sometimes when you're pursuing your passions, like you
get so compulsive about trying, especially in something that's like
so hard to pursue. Yeah, you get so compulsive that
you kind of act a little irrationally.
Speaker 2 (20:35):
Yeah. Like number two, let's go, it's called it's wasting
time on the wrong relationships. I've been there.
Speaker 6 (20:44):
I stayed a little too long, hoping things would change
in a year past, and then another year past, and
then finally had the courage to to walk away.
Speaker 2 (20:52):
But what gave you the courage? Did he did he
do something?
Speaker 1 (20:56):
No?
Speaker 6 (20:57):
I think it was just a combination of everything And honestly,
me looking at the clock and looking how much time
was wasted, yeah, and just being like, no, I'm going
to put myself first. I deserve better. I had the
moment that you had in the car and was able
to leave and take my time back good.
Speaker 4 (21:14):
Which is great because now you don't have to regret that.
You don't regret the like not having done that. I
think what's interesting that you said about the situation is
sometimes your big moments aren't perpetuated by some big catalyst.
Sometimes it's just I've finally had enough, And it's not
(21:36):
always because he or she cheated on me, right, it's
just your body and your mind and your soul all
link up to say I'm done.
Speaker 2 (21:44):
Yeah, Like I should have done this when I was
I had a porch party and I was dating a guy.
He drank too much. I had a friend who was
doing tarot card readings and I thought, yeah, go go
give give him to the guests, like let's do it.
And he comes. He comes out at the end of
the party. He's almost like mad and anger and crying.
(22:05):
He's like why would even tarot carvings? Like it's it's
so dumb, and like why did I have to help
your friend Lara, Like with the with the barbecue and
I had to get like my friend to drink and
I was like, I was in shock. I was like,
is this guy complaining because he had to help out
at a barbecue out like pass And I'm telling you, Erica,
that's a huge regret. I was like, I'm sorry that
(22:27):
you feel so overwhelmed. I don't know what I did
wrong to make you feel that overwhelmed. Like I was
an idiot. I was idiot, and you were also just
like in the moment, Shocks still stayed with that with
that em Ra effort for like a month, only a month.
I'm not going to go into it with years.
Speaker 3 (22:45):
No, actually she's still with him.
Speaker 2 (22:48):
It was bad. It was bad. So that's definitely a gret.
I've definitely been there.
Speaker 4 (22:52):
But that's but I think that's really cool for people
listening or watching, is that like you had both this
like awesome, you know, power moment of saying I deserve
better and this other moment where you look back you're like,
oh wait, why was I taking that when it was him?
That shows you that you're a fucking human being?
Speaker 2 (23:10):
Yeah, I really am. And honestly, the other one that
says working too much missing out in life cable. Oh yeah, yeah,
I even still feel like sometimes I do it now,
but I agree with you Younger, When I was younger,
I did it a lot. Oh. I was obsessed with
working and to the point like my friends were like,
you need to have light work life balance. And then
(23:32):
that's how I ended up dating a bunch of like
lame people because I felt compelled to to date. It
didn't matter who like, it was just like, all right, fine,
let's make this happen. Right. The next few are not
express your feelings, not taking more risks you were, letting
fear dictate your decisions, not standing in touch with friends,
caring too much about what others think, not prioritizing your
(23:56):
hell sooner, and then not being present or enjoying the moment.
So I feel like with all of those I do,
I tend to do a pretty good job staying in
touch with friends because I feel like when I get
out of touch with them, you can become really isolated,
and then you feel like you've gone so far without
touching base that it's almost like you can't get back.
Speaker 3 (24:18):
Yeah you know, Yeah, it takes a moment, and for.
Speaker 2 (24:21):
Me, definitely care way too much about what other thinks,
especially when I was younger, but now I'm like, eh,
screw it. Now we're tired, fuck off, tired to care.
This is me and whatever, and like I don't just
if you like it or not, like that's why you like.
Speaker 3 (24:36):
Me and my team of sweater you don't.
Speaker 2 (24:38):
And what I'm hearing from all of this, though, is
that which is like, definitely is some of the research
that we did.
Speaker 4 (24:45):
People most regret what they didn't do. They're in action
and a lot of what you just said is like
like the not prioritizing health or not taking not being present,
or it's like letting fear dictate. It's like the same
idea would be like not leaning in to my fearlessness
or willingness to take risks.
Speaker 2 (25:04):
Absolutely, Like that's why I did stand up for two years.
I was scared my first show and then I was like,
oh it's fun. Yeah, and then I was like I
don't really like it anymore, moved on.
Speaker 3 (25:13):
But so at least you knew instead of but I
did it ever known?
Speaker 2 (25:17):
Yeah? Yeah, I did it. Okay, so we got to
do regriver, let's do it. So, so what is something
that you wish you never texted? God?
Speaker 3 (25:30):
I don't remember anything.
Speaker 6 (25:32):
I have so many examples. Oh my god, it's embarrassing
how many times I've misfired a text or an email,
many of which I should not discuss publicly.
Speaker 3 (25:45):
So she's going to I've.
Speaker 6 (25:47):
Done it in work situations. I've done it in relationship situations.
I've done it in family situations. You think I would
have learned my lesson one time I did it. We
have this friend group that all came together through our
kids club soccer. So the boys were like ten, they're
all in their twenties now, but we became such close
friends with this group of people. We all still get together.
(26:10):
We go on vacations with these people, We celebrate holidays
with these people. We are a tight group. And we
were all hanging out one night and two of the
kids of the other parents I thought were being little dicks.
So then everybody leaves. I go to text Dave, I
go to text my ex husband, and I say, I
cannot believe the way so and so and so and
(26:32):
so we're talking to their parents.
Speaker 1 (26:34):
They are such little assholes. The disrespect is astonishing.
Speaker 3 (26:38):
I know where this is going.
Speaker 6 (26:40):
I hit sends in the bubble turns green, and I
was like, why is the bubble turning green? The bubble
only turns green when we're on the group chat. I
sent this to Dave, I sent it to the old chat,
and I just in that moment, the whole bottom dropped out,
and I said, I just.
Speaker 1 (26:55):
Blew up our friendship with all these people. I just
blew it up.
Speaker 6 (26:58):
So I immediately get her on the phone and I say,
I am so sorry, I'm so sorry.
Speaker 1 (27:02):
Thank god. She's laughing. Her husband picks up. He gets
on the phone. He goes, oh my god, you're freaking out.
You're freaking out. They're all laughing. They think it's hilarious.
Speaker 3 (27:11):
I mean, that's a cool response.
Speaker 6 (27:12):
Well, and it was just so we laugh about it
to this day because their whole thing was like we
just kept thinking about how much you were freaking out
that you fucking did that, and we thought it was
the most hilarious thing.
Speaker 4 (27:25):
It could have been way worse because it could have
been war plans.
Speaker 2 (27:29):
Oh good, But I guess that's like not a big
deal now. Yes, Wow, I thought you said you had
a fashion regret that you you were you thought you
had or whatever. There didn't. In high school, I remember
at a dance. I mean I owned it at the time,
(27:49):
but I was wearing these like white like pearly pants,
and I had space buns in the hair, and I
had these like high like white like sneaker things, and like.
Speaker 3 (28:04):
It was just like a lot of glitter.
Speaker 1 (28:06):
It was.
Speaker 2 (28:06):
It was if like my little pony had exploded all
over me. I love this for you right now. Like
if you walked into a club in La here, you know,
the people would be like, that's fire.
Speaker 3 (28:15):
But you just said something that would never happen.
Speaker 2 (28:18):
I know me neither. We're not going off into a club. Well,
we'll go to a bar and I want you to
rewear that. Would you do that and wear it on
the podcast?
Speaker 7 (28:25):
Oh?
Speaker 3 (28:25):
Hell yeah no?
Speaker 2 (28:26):
But like we surely create the photo, we'll read the photo,
but then you have to wear the outfit on the
next time we record it. Oh sure, hell yeah, and
then all sweater. Okay, I'll get there.
Speaker 4 (28:38):
I think I still had circulation back then, so it's
probably like a small tank top or even worse, a
tube top.
Speaker 2 (28:44):
A tube top. Oh god, number tube tops. I can't
wear them. I don't want to. Absolutely get the hell out.
Speaker 3 (28:50):
A tubetop is basically just a headband.
Speaker 2 (28:52):
But remember when when tubetops, when people would wear tubetops
and they would have the bikini line tanline, and that
was cool. You're like, I gotta go get a tansel.
When I wear the tube top, they see that I've
been tanning, and apparently it's sexy.
Speaker 4 (29:06):
Whenever, listen, it's not. It's not sexy.
Speaker 2 (29:09):
It's not. I could see the line of the Baane suit.
I don't know why that makes you want to take
your clothes off. I don't when you could have.
Speaker 3 (29:15):
Easily just worn a cap sleeve and call it a day.
Speaker 2 (29:18):
Thank you. Okay. So I have a funny regret where
I just think like why was I like this? Right?
So I need you to think like why was I
like this?
Speaker 3 (29:27):
Okay, I'll give it to you.
Speaker 2 (29:28):
I was linking second grade. I wanted a retainer so bad.
Speaker 3 (29:32):
Why.
Speaker 2 (29:33):
I don't know why. No one knows why I wanted
it so bad. So I got spearmint gum and I
twirled it and twirled it and twirled it and I
put it like around my key salt looked like a retainer. Okay,
it was there all day. I am not joking. I
would move it with my tongue and keep it there,
and I remember just getting cavities from your spearmint gum.
(29:55):
I mean it was it was like it was like
one or two days. I remember the kids and meanwhile
around I was so happy. I was like, yeah, I'm
a retainer. Like it made me like cool, Like he's
like nobody else had a I'm telling you, I don't
know did you know kids that had You said you
saw kids with retainers and you wanted them A couple
a couple, but I don't think any of them were
in my class. And the only the one weird memory
(30:17):
that I have is I think his name was mister Ronsky,
like leaning down and being like, oh, let me look
at it, and I was like yeah, smiling, he's so
close to my face and he just went, oh, yeah,
it looks good. Nice retainer. He didn't say like, maybe
you should remove the gum from your teeth that's been
marinating there for almost two days. He literally went with it.
(30:39):
And I'm like, bro, good job on being like, you
could have called me de Lulu if you wanted and
said we can all tell this is spearmint gum, but
he didn't.
Speaker 3 (30:49):
You know what that was?
Speaker 4 (30:51):
That was quality of life minus envy. You had too
much envy? Yeah, and so you were, but then you
were happy when you had the spearmint gum.
Speaker 2 (31:00):
It's true. I would know we were happy, so happy.
I was so happy. So do you have one? It's like,
oh I was, I like this. Yeah, it's it's a
regret that I was able to have and then process
and move on. I regret that I didn't get on
meds earlier. Absolutely a big pro med ditto podcast. Med
me up right, I don't care how many I have
to take, give them to me. Yeah, possible.
Speaker 4 (31:22):
We know you're fifty seven fifty seven seven supplements, but meds, meds, No,
but meds rates right right right. I remember Friendy Wendy
saying she was like, oh my god, I was tired
of like white knuckling through life. And then I understood
what she meant when I got on meds, and I
was like, oh, it is too fucking short to be like,
(31:42):
to be spending all of this energy.
Speaker 2 (31:45):
That sad or mad or whatever like whatever.
Speaker 4 (31:48):
Feeling of you know, angst and like just emotional depletion.
Speaker 3 (31:53):
It's not worth it.
Speaker 4 (31:55):
No, And then you're like, oh, I can be there.
I can be there for my family. I can be
there from my friends, I can be there for myself.
And if a doctor is telling me like, hey, yeah,
this is what I think you should do, and like,
why the fuck not right?
Speaker 2 (32:08):
I don't know why people were walking around any prival
about like I don't take anything. I'm fine. I'm like,
are you though? Really? On the inside, I doubt it.
But then you do it and you're like, oh, man,
I regret not doing this sooner exactly. I'm right there
with you now, I gotta know, is it. I'm gonna
put this in a way where I'm like, there's righteous
regret where you feel like like where you maybe don't
(32:30):
have to apologize to someone that you feel like it
will just say toxic.
Speaker 8 (32:36):
Right.
Speaker 2 (32:36):
I feel like I do have a good righteous regrets. Okay,
they hear it where I'm like, no, I don't. I
don't know I did it at all. I did it
right a little bit. Maybe you're saying that maybe you
should feel a little regret.
Speaker 3 (32:47):
Is that what you're saying?
Speaker 2 (32:48):
Yeah, And I don't not at all. Even now. My
my uncle was living with me me, I believe to
my grandma, I was very young. I think I was
like eight or nine, he was like on draw ugs
and he's whacking do He comes in the house and
he steals from my grandma's purse and my grandma is
calling him out in the kitchen and he's yelling at her,
(33:11):
getting really loud and like when he's when you're on
like cocaine or crack or whatever f he was on,
Like you know, he's going whack and me, I'm not
into those meds. Just we're not into those meds. MEA
Lisa is like literally she's just a little one. You know,
she's like five to one at this point. I think
I'm probably taller than her. He gets so loud and
up in her face. I grab the frying pan and
(33:33):
I whacked him over the head with it one hand.
I couldn't because I couldn't. He was so close to
her that I will go from zero to sixty if
you f was somebody that And that is a thing
that I've talked about on this podcast before. Don't come
for an animal in front of me, and don't come
for somebody to care about, because I will become a liability.
(33:54):
And I was eight and nine and I was a liability.
I grabbed it. I was so mad I was like
stop and I just was like whacked him right over
that he didn't die, He kind of fell back into
the fridge. And that's like kind of the most that
I remember. This is an insane First of all, why
would you regret that? I don't because you were like
(34:14):
a superhero. It's such a like who would notice? That's
like a cartoon. You were like living like you were
like real life.
Speaker 4 (34:20):
And a cartoon, and you were protecting someone that like
having the you know, yeah, the courage and the awareness
of what was happening.
Speaker 3 (34:29):
How old were you?
Speaker 2 (34:30):
I was like eight or nine. That's that's crazy because
I mean, I guess I'm saying like that's admirable. Okay,
this is good because I guess.
Speaker 4 (34:39):
I'm now promoting violence. But at the same time, your
Abelita was in danger.
Speaker 2 (34:43):
Yeah, and that's that's so.
Speaker 5 (34:45):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (34:45):
I think is that even righteous regret?
Speaker 2 (34:48):
Though I know I maybe not, but I think maybe
other people. Let's say he died, yes, it would be right.
Speaker 3 (34:54):
I don't think. I don't know. My vote is it
was good. I'm glad she did it.
Speaker 2 (34:59):
So does anger ever help you move through like regret faster? Right?
I think so? Because anger propels you forward as opposed
to sadness kind of keeps you in the same spot.
Speaker 4 (35:14):
It gives you kind of like stace. It like in
staceis anger is like I you know, it's an energy
lift because it's like you're you know what I mean,
you have to get it out and you have to
do something. Yeah, So I do think it helps you
get over regret.
Speaker 2 (35:28):
I do too. I think like as long as like
what we talk about in getting into allowing your anger
or your rage getting out in a safe way, I
don't go to the gym, take a run, punch a pillow,
realizing that that can help really like kick your butt
into into just get over it. It's that shouldn't ruin
(35:49):
or take over your life, this one little regret because
I guarantee you the other person ain't think about it
totally and you've got life to live now. So now
your regret is potential giving you more regret exactly because
up your time, because you're not because you're not like, Okay,
I'm honoring the fact that I did this thing. I'm
not proud of it, but I'm going to learn from
(36:10):
it and move on. Then not moving on is actually
worse than almost like not regretting at all, so which
I think they're not right. Weirdly, the not regretting is
what can lead you to eventually not actually moving on.
Speaker 3 (36:23):
You know, there's like moving on, and then there's really
moving on.
Speaker 2 (36:26):
You know you're like mad at yourself for not having
left that person, or you're.
Speaker 3 (36:30):
Mad yourself for not having done that.
Speaker 2 (36:31):
Well, now you have the opportunity to do it now,
like if you're still with the person, do it now.
You can take comfort in it in that in the
fact that everyone has regret. You can also laugh at yourself, like,
oh god, this how stupid. Like when I got a
note so wrong at a cruise ship audition, I wanted
(36:51):
to die. I wanted to crawl in a hole and die.
And now I just go, it's fine. You were nervous,
you didn't hit the right notes. And also you just
have to remember the past. Time heals all wounds in
relationships and with regret, and like they're not They're never
as ugly as you think they are.
Speaker 4 (37:07):
Like I know everyone thinks that everyone remembers like the
ugly parts of someone, but it's actually the opposite. I
remember like the standout moments.
Speaker 2 (37:16):
You remember, the more fun things, and I think that
we need to learn to love ourselves through all of
those flawed things. That makes us who we are. And
there are people who love us with with both with
the good and the flawed. So it's like, have your
graditional love there, you have it, and have it for yourself.
Speaker 4 (37:35):
The point is, like, I think that's where we miss
the botalize, having unconditional love for ourselves.
Speaker 2 (37:40):
You got to tell me about come to the wed
it's a weak tell me.
Speaker 3 (37:44):
Okay, So we know that this year Pope Fran.
Speaker 2 (37:51):
Has passed, right, You did know that, right, Tara, Yeah,
you did know that there was a pope.
Speaker 3 (37:57):
Yeah, it's not Tara doesn't doesn't.
Speaker 4 (38:00):
Read the news. I knew it's intentional. We we are
fine with it.
Speaker 2 (38:04):
I think I knew it. Maybe didn't care. Not ticked
up on a calendar saying, oh wow, Pope died, but
I'm with you.
Speaker 3 (38:10):
So Peyfran out Okay.
Speaker 2 (38:12):
Everybody talked about it, right, it was like saturated the news. Yeah.
Speaker 4 (38:17):
What also happened in that same time is a young
woman by the name of Sister Na Kanabajo. Cool name
is Brazilian. She's a Brazilian nun. The oldest living woman.
She died at one hundred and seventeen. That's bad ass. Yeah,
(38:38):
I agree, And I was reading about her and like
even as of a year before she died, like in
an interview she said, I'm young, pretty and friendly.
Speaker 2 (38:48):
Oh my god, I love her. Right, she is what
we aspire all to be. I mean, I'm not one
hundred and seventeen, and I don't even think of myself
as like I'm young, pretty and friendly. She was one
hundred and sixteen, and we are, we are young pretty.
Speaker 3 (39:02):
I mean, like what, like so cool?
Speaker 2 (39:03):
Like this is literally a year before she died and
she was so old but like clearly still so young
in her heart. Yeah, it's so cool to learn about her,
Like she didn't get cataract surgery until she was one
hundred and six. People get cataract surgery when they're like forty, right,
But you got to tell me, like, did do you
have facts about what she did like for a living
(39:24):
or with her life?
Speaker 4 (39:25):
She helped the poor, she helped like disenfranchise people.
Speaker 2 (39:28):
Yeah, she did some good Jews, which we love, and
the good Jews can get you far in life.
Speaker 4 (39:33):
She overtook the oldest woman like there had been the
oldest woman who was a Japanese woman who had been
alive before the Titanic sunk. The oldest woman ever was
one hundred and twenty two.
Speaker 2 (39:45):
Wow.
Speaker 3 (39:46):
She like basically smoked and drank.
Speaker 2 (39:48):
She love it. There's no signs behind why people die early,
dilate why that we get campers.
Speaker 3 (39:54):
Well, that is one. There's one through line. There is
sign through line. It's all women.
Speaker 2 (40:00):
Yeah, and I really think a big part of that is,
like men, you need to get some friends when you
get older. Okay, you need to get some fucking friends.
And we want that for you.
Speaker 3 (40:11):
It's really easy. Phone a friend.
Speaker 2 (40:13):
Just phone a friend, phone a friend, have some community bill.
Speaker 4 (40:16):
You will be sit alone, you won't be so sad,
and then physiologically you might last a little bit longer. Yeah,
you gotta let your feelings out. It's a us about
not letting your feelings out. You don't talk about your
feelings exactly.
Speaker 2 (40:27):
You got to build the village, have thoughts about it,
be vulnerable and be open.
Speaker 1 (40:31):
It's time to wrap it up. This is our goodbye.
Speaker 2 (40:35):
Well we got to.
Speaker 8 (40:36):
Know what that is.
Speaker 10 (40:37):
Let's get our pillows, ladies, Let's dry pillow and don't
forget your branded pillows, you know, give us five stars,
give us a light, give us a comment, tell us
like what you regret, and like, if you have any.
Speaker 2 (40:49):
Any of those stories, we would really love to hear them.
Speaker 4 (40:53):
And if there was anything that you found that really
worked to get over something, Yeah, that was that was
you know, staying with you deep
Speaker 6 (41:00):
Breath in you guys, let it out, Scream into your
pullout wom
Do you remember when he was more?
Speaker 2 (00:02):
She just said it so flat, She's like, do you
know who Robin Williams was like, oh my air cut Erica.
I don't think I've ever seen that.
Speaker 3 (00:13):
So he was in good Will the TV show.
Speaker 2 (00:15):
Yes he was. I didn't know he was actually the
actually Genie and Aladdin. He was so good in that role.
Is the fact that that movie was ever recreated is
beyond me? Wait has it come out yet?
Speaker 3 (00:36):
It was the live action Will Smith was the Genie.
Speaker 2 (00:38):
Oh yeah, I didn't.
Speaker 4 (00:39):
I'm like Will Smith, but he's not just good at
slapping people. He is also like talented. But like when
you have that epic of a performance that's also.
Speaker 2 (00:51):
Rage right there, just going right up on stage smacking somebody.
Speaker 4 (00:56):
Oh yeah, I mean that is literally like that's like
the literal.
Speaker 3 (01:00):
Definition of right. I mean raging out of raging out.
Speaker 2 (01:04):
And Dad is where I think when we were discussing
it was a great call. I'm here with you. Your
(01:28):
name's Ebar, and we're doing the rage Pod.
Speaker 3 (01:30):
We're doing the Rage Pod.
Speaker 4 (01:31):
I am here with Tara Erickson, and we rage against
the Serene and all the things in.
Speaker 2 (01:36):
Between, everything in between. There's so much to rage about.
But today, what are we talking about. We're going to
talk about something that we've experienced, okay, because we're here,
But you can't. You can't pretend like you haven't because
we all have. We've all had regret. Yeah, we've all
had regret, and then we've also all had sort of
(01:57):
rage regret. Right, we regret about raging like you, you
don't have.
Speaker 4 (02:03):
Just got to make adjustment, everybody. Keep that in the edit.
Speaker 2 (02:06):
Please call me. Keep that in the She was holy
laptop on her knees and was like, wait, real, true story.
We learn this and podcasting this is it's.
Speaker 3 (02:17):
A oh yeah, a double fist, double fist.
Speaker 2 (02:20):
Which sounds so now here I'm podcasting and at the bar. Yeah,
that's how we roll.
Speaker 3 (02:25):
Oh I went porn you went drinking.
Speaker 2 (02:26):
Great, I mean that's how we roll. That is right,
the FFS forever. Unless this podcast tears us apart through
all our pornography and all of our drinking, we are
together together. Well, what I was going to say is
that you know, people are likely with no regrets. I
don't have any regrets. That's why I'm like, don't even
(02:48):
try to play like you have zero regrets in life,
Like give it up already.
Speaker 4 (02:52):
You've got it. Listen, you've got it. You're walking around,
you're breathing, You've.
Speaker 2 (02:55):
Got it, exactly. And that's the thing is like, right,
we shouldn't be so like scared of this idea that like, oh,
if we regret, that makes us a less than person
or like we're failing at life. Like so that's that's
just And by regretting you learn things that you can
do differently in the future. But if you just like
suppress that, just like if you suppress.
Speaker 4 (03:17):
Anger, then maybe you just repeat the same patterns over
and over because you're just like, oh, I'm like a
horse in Central Park. I've got blinders on and I
just keep walking forward.
Speaker 2 (03:27):
Exactly. So I feel like we're here to kind of
like to stigmatize it. Yeah yeah, yeah, Like it's okay,
like feel the regret and then if you feel it,
then you get to move on and then again not
repeat that cycle. I mean, it's tough when you buy
a pair of pants that you hate, you.
Speaker 4 (03:41):
Know, I mean I just thought a pair of pants,
you guys, I was so excited about this pair of pants.
I was like they marketed it like it was this
cool vintage denim, and I was like, I'm gonna look
so fucking cool in this spring, summer season.
Speaker 2 (03:58):
Whatever we're in and they're weird.
Speaker 3 (04:00):
They're fucking weird.
Speaker 4 (04:01):
Yep, they look like like thin curtains. I thought it
was getting denim. I got like thin curtains, like not
blackout curtains. Yeah, online regret, online buyers remorse absolutely, but
here look look.
Speaker 3 (04:16):
I mean, granted they're ill fitting.
Speaker 4 (04:18):
It's like I swiped right and they were much different
from their photo totally. But like in the future, I'm
not gonna just go hog wild click happy on an
online flash sail.
Speaker 2 (04:29):
No, you won't, because I've done that. And I just
got a shirt the other day from Timu, and I know,
shout out to t it's always me and thearly word
did you get out of my Temu? But like, I
got this shirt and she's like her pants thin satin. Mine.
Then it was like a shirt and I thought it
was going to be thick, thin satin, and then you
can't tell it's all colorful. Whacked it right right, But
(04:52):
then in the freaking corner right here, there's this heart
and it says God's love is all around.
Speaker 3 (04:56):
Oh no, you st a.
Speaker 1 (05:02):
It's not meant to be.
Speaker 3 (05:03):
You know what you need to do.
Speaker 2 (05:05):
You need to send tim the Boundary song and need
some space from your god patches. We'll close up zoom
on the god patch. Yeah, Like, don't just give me
this thing where it looks all color. I mean it
looks like this sweater dope. Right, you're not feel like
there's going to be this God's love?
Speaker 5 (05:22):
Is it?
Speaker 2 (05:22):
And it says it three times? And where does it
hit on your body? Does it hit on your hip?
It's low down, but it's also it's trying.
Speaker 4 (05:30):
To get you pregnant. It's trying to get you pregnant
because it's close. It's close to the ovary.
Speaker 2 (05:35):
And it's not just one, it's multiple. Exactly, I'm gonna
tell you exactly.
Speaker 3 (05:39):
They want you to have seven children at once.
Speaker 2 (05:44):
You got to give me a cunt of the week.
Speaker 3 (05:45):
We got to tease them with that.
Speaker 2 (05:46):
Oh, I got one for you, just a reminder. Count
of the week stands for courageous, unapologetic, notorious.
Speaker 3 (06:03):
Do you want a hint of your content?
Speaker 2 (06:04):
Yeah, you gotta give it to me. Let's go habit
ho a habit ho, like they're a whore with habits.
It sounds really, it just sounds disturbing.
Speaker 3 (06:20):
I'm just gonna go on, you will.
Speaker 2 (06:22):
You do not know who it is, so like I
but I do like I like this, like this curiosity. Yeah,
which means we have to throw it to for any
oneday because I'm trying to hear some Rage hotline stuff.
Give me the juice because I'm just gonna be sitting
here thinking about habit ho and I gotta get out
of that mindset.
Speaker 1 (06:40):
No no, no, no, no no, you've reached the Rage Hotline.
Please leave us a message.
Speaker 6 (06:46):
Okay, guys, this week we have two callers, so let's
go to the first caller.
Speaker 7 (06:53):
There has been one thing my entire life that has
sent me down such a spiral. I have felt my
chest tighten and be so filled with anger and disgust
at the same time. And it's when there is a
(07:17):
glob of toothpaste in the sink. Multitude of reasons.
Speaker 3 (07:23):
It's just gross.
Speaker 7 (07:24):
It's like someone else's spit and toothpaste in the sink. Disgusting.
You're looking at this disgusting thing while you have a
toothbrush in your mouth, so immediately gagging, immediately gross, gagging,
hate the sight of this second reason, I feel like
(07:45):
it's just this sense of carelessness when you are brushing
your teeth, you're looking into the sink to spit, you
are turning the water on. How are you not just
like brushing it down? I bought a brush that sits
next to my faucet so that you can wipe down
(08:06):
your sink after you're.
Speaker 5 (08:08):
Done using what because I'm so I remember my brother
that is doing this when I was seven or eight
and having the same exact response, and into adulthood.
Speaker 7 (08:20):
I'm thirty six now and it still bothers me. So
that's in my life that has caused rage since I
have been brushing my teeth and noticing the glob of
toothpaste on the sink.
Speaker 3 (08:36):
Yeah, she's got some toothpaste trauma.
Speaker 2 (08:39):
She really does, just like PTSD. Like I know, I
didn't realize you could talk that long about a glob
of toothpaste and his sink was the poetry. Now it's
ruined her life.
Speaker 3 (08:48):
That was a moth She she just won.
Speaker 2 (08:50):
She just won with that story. I'll tell you that.
But that is gnarly. You just you don't even need.
She gives it extra too. She has a brush for
a bra she's in your hand like a normal person,
and you wash it down.
Speaker 3 (09:06):
So here's where I'm at with this.
Speaker 2 (09:08):
It is just it is gross. But I think a
lot of people would feel like it's okay if that's
left there until I'm cleaning the sink. No, absolutely, you
do it. Oh my god.
Speaker 3 (09:26):
Disagree, hard disagree.
Speaker 2 (09:28):
I mean, I don't do it. But I'm just saying
I've seen it. I've seen it from other people. You
had me worried.
Speaker 3 (09:35):
No, I take the water, like you're saying.
Speaker 4 (09:38):
But I guess in the scheme of things that are
the most disgusting in a bathroom, that to me isn't
the headliner.
Speaker 2 (09:45):
I'm with you. You know what in bathroom, it's the
poop streak.
Speaker 1 (09:49):
Okay, we're moving on to the next one.
Speaker 3 (09:51):
Frendy Wendy. We just hit the sensitivity.
Speaker 2 (09:54):
But she does not like he just stepped and she's like,
I'm the producer here. She she hers, stomach turns.
Speaker 1 (10:01):
Let's roll the next one.
Speaker 8 (10:03):
Oh wow, Hi, rache Pod calling in because I'm raging
about every fucking person out there that has something to
complain about all the goddamn time. It's like, live your
fucking life. You hear your alive, you ain't fighting cancer,
you got kids lovely. Now just shut the fuck up,
stop complaining and just do your thing and be happy
that you're fucking yeah, okay, goodbye, all right.
Speaker 3 (10:26):
I have thoughts.
Speaker 2 (10:27):
I have thoughts.
Speaker 4 (10:27):
First of all, I'm sorry an Australian accent. Everything's funny,
the best.
Speaker 2 (10:31):
But also, yeah, you have less to complain about because
you are in Australia, or you are Australian. America has
a lot to complain. I don't know if he if
he probably he might live in in the US. And yeah,
but he can always go back. That's right, you can always.
He's got an escape route. You're right, you're right, But
(10:52):
I agree. I mean, there there's like people that I
that I work with or just you know, when you
have some friends and they're just like constantly complaining. Like
I used to tell you, you guys, when I you know,
with the long COVID stuff, I'm like, listen, I don't
want to talk about it. I'm sick and tired of
being sick and tired. I don't even want to discuss it.
I hate it. And then there are some people where
you're like, you have a house, you made great money,
(11:14):
You don't have kids. You built this business because you
wanted it, and now you could you could not complain, right, No,
I there's definitely like a point where it's become like
they can't stop. That's that's sort of like their their default.
(11:34):
It's just like instead of being like, oh, I'm comfortable
with you know, normal silences, let's just fill the space
with complaints. It's like a personality fault or something like
they feel it's like a tick, like you can't help it.
Speaker 4 (11:49):
Well, I heard this thing recently that I said to
friendy Wendy, this is how I know it might be
like a good thing to.
Speaker 3 (11:56):
Talk about you. Oh, because she was like, oh that
makes sense.
Speaker 4 (12:00):
Quality of life minus envy equals happiness. Hell yeah, So
you could have all the houses and all the well
not all the kids, all the houses, kids, whatever. You
found your soulmate and you got the car that you want.
But if you're still like envying some other person's life
that you don't have, guess what, probably not gonna be
(12:21):
very fucking happy.
Speaker 2 (12:22):
I agree, you have to. You have to really chalk
it up to being grateful, and you've got to remember, yeah,
that's stuff, you know, because it's like, you know me,
I'm like, oh, I just want a tiny house in
the valley with my two cats. Just let me have it,
Like she will not settle for a big house. It
has to be a tiny n It's got to be
tiny one because we know I'm not gonna live in
a big old house. I just want you know, I
(12:43):
want that. Then I have to remind myself, like I
live alone in a great studio with my two cats.
It's it's great, like you've got great friends. I've got
great friends. I got great friends with great places to
go and hang out.
Speaker 1 (12:54):
Co hosts.
Speaker 2 (12:55):
Great, I'll see where I going girl. Yeah, but no,
it's true. We have to be grateful. Well, the guy
that said it was like, look, do you know, like
it wasn't that long ago that people didn't have hot showers?
What like if you go back, like like how long
like the Thomas Edison date, like they didn't have hot showers?
(13:18):
What year was? I don't know? Asked me to n
eighteen hundreds, maybe nineteen fifty.
Speaker 3 (13:25):
Definitely not fifty. But wasn't it early nineteen? I don't know.
We need where's our fact checker?
Speaker 2 (13:32):
We don't have it. I was I feel sleep in history.
I feel like I'm taking that timeline quiz by New
York Times, which I do love, by the way. But anyways,
what I was saying is he says like, so sometimes
I'll be in the shower.
Speaker 3 (13:44):
And I was like, Hey, this is really cool. You
get to take a hot shower.
Speaker 2 (13:47):
It's true.
Speaker 4 (13:48):
I love that we understand everyone has their own specific
things that make them frustrated, and we see you.
Speaker 2 (13:54):
And we have to tell the people that you guys
got to get in on this Ray hot line, Like
we gotta tell them, that's right.
Speaker 3 (13:59):
What's the number two?
Speaker 2 (14:00):
Okay, it's two and three two nine three five nine
nine to fives. Give them the email.
Speaker 4 (14:05):
You can also email us, which I know is like
kind of weird, but we like it.
Speaker 3 (14:09):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (14:10):
The Ragepod at gmail dot com. That's the Ragepod at
gmail dot com. Either you're a teenager and you have
too much oil, or you're reaching menopause and all you want.
Speaker 2 (14:23):
Is oil because you lose it as you age.
Speaker 9 (14:26):
Fun Yep, finding skincare that works for you is a
tough thing, except that we found the unicorn neon hippie.
It has seven mushrooms, it hydrates, it's full of nutrients.
Speaker 2 (14:39):
Guess what You get a discount on Neon Hippie for listening.
Speaker 3 (14:42):
To our podcast, The Rage Pod. Use the code.
Speaker 4 (14:45):
Rage for twenty five percent off at neon hippie dot com.
Speaker 3 (14:50):
Okay, so we're back.
Speaker 2 (14:52):
We are, and today we are talking about regret rage.
It's like when you, you know, when you go into like
a meeting at work or something, and you think like,
oh God, I should I could have said that better.
I should have No, why why did I do that?
Why did I do that? I could have done this?
Like you're in the car, you're at home, You're like,
I what in the actual f And it can literally
(15:15):
take over your day or a week. Oh yeah, I
hate it.
Speaker 3 (15:18):
You just like repeat it in your mind. Yes, you know.
Speaker 2 (15:20):
It'd be like like, you know, we've all been through breakups, right, yeah,
And instead of just saying what you thought, like, hey,
you're an uncurable narcissist, so just saying that, you give
them a hug. And then you look back you're like, oh,
that was my moment to step into my power and
I gave him a fucking hug. Yeah, And then you
and then you not only are you like broken hearted
(15:41):
and sad, but then you're beating yourself up because you
regret how you handle the situation.
Speaker 3 (15:46):
That's a lot.
Speaker 2 (15:47):
I mean, you were nice, you give you give him
a hug.
Speaker 3 (15:49):
Well, this is kind of a hypothetical.
Speaker 2 (15:51):
I mean, I rank like you were like no, and
he'd and then you're like, well, I'll give you a
hug before I go. It's like, what I.
Speaker 3 (16:00):
Mean, don't you think that we all end up at
the very end?
Speaker 7 (16:03):
Do?
Speaker 3 (16:03):
I mean, I mean, it's a hug.
Speaker 1 (16:04):
Goodbot.
Speaker 4 (16:05):
I didn't like have someone break up with me and
say and then they said these awful things, and.
Speaker 2 (16:09):
I was like, here, give me a hug, Come on in,
come on in. There was one time I'll just say
it ain't a breakup and I went, you're right, I
do deserve better and walked out the door. Oh that's
so good. What Academy award.
Speaker 3 (16:24):
That's a mic drop moment.
Speaker 1 (16:25):
It was real.
Speaker 2 (16:27):
I was real proud of when I was driving my cars, like, absolutely,
no regret. You're a badass.
Speaker 4 (16:31):
That is very cool when you say the things that
you envision yourself saying. But at the same time, right, like,
we also shouldn't beat ourselves up if we if we
don't have this fucking like badass First Wives Club moment.
Speaker 2 (16:46):
Exactly, because like there are times like like that, how
you imagined that maybe it would go, that you would
want it to go. But then there's other times where
it comes out and it's freaking ugly, it's.
Speaker 3 (16:54):
Bad, or you get paralyzed. Like there's so many things
that happened.
Speaker 2 (16:57):
I think what that is, Like it comes down to
it's expectations, right, yeah, I expect it. Like, honestly, what's
the phrase the road to hell.
Speaker 4 (17:08):
Was paved with good intentions? I think the road to
hell was paved with impossible expectations. It's true because like
we have expectations of others and they don't meet them,
and then we're resempful. And then we have expectations of
ourselves and we don't meet them, and then we regret
it and we think about it over and over and over. Yeah,
there's a really good talk that a Ted, an actual
(17:29):
TED talk, not just like one that we're.
Speaker 3 (17:30):
Like, oh, that was a Ted talk.
Speaker 4 (17:32):
But this writer, Catherine Schultz, I'm not sure what she's
doing now. She's writing for The New Yorker at the time.
Speaker 3 (17:37):
She has this whole talk on.
Speaker 2 (17:39):
How regret is really is actually.
Speaker 3 (17:42):
Something that's of service to us.
Speaker 4 (17:44):
She breaks it down into denial, which is you do
something You're like, oh, I just please, like just make
it go away.
Speaker 3 (17:51):
Like maybe if I, like did I dream that?
Speaker 4 (17:53):
Or maybe if I just forget about it, it'll just
somehow have not happened. And then it goes into bewilderment
like how could that have happened?
Speaker 3 (18:01):
How could that have happened?
Speaker 4 (18:03):
And then the bewilderment is kind of what leads into
the self punishment of like, oh my god, I'm like
kicking I can't believe that that happened, And now that
I've kind of accepted that it's happened, I am kicking myself.
And then it goes into perseveration.
Speaker 2 (18:20):
Is it that like you're separating yourself from what you're hearing.
Speaker 3 (18:23):
It's like the word of the noun and persevering.
Speaker 4 (18:25):
Oh so it's more of the obsessive nature of like
the way she says it, it's that you say, make
it go away, make it go away, make it go away,
make it like you can't. It's the shame spiral of
like you just can't get out of, yeah, of obsessing
over wanting it to not have happened.
Speaker 2 (18:43):
I feel like that probably happens a lot with with cheating.
I started watching this show you guys know how is
called like cheat cheaters or something cheat cheat or they cheat.
I don't even know. It's ridiculous, so it's.
Speaker 3 (18:57):
But it's it's very nuanced.
Speaker 2 (19:00):
Exactly, And I feel like you'd have a lot of
that where people are in denial, right and then you
you punish yourself or you're in bill You're like, oh
my god, how did I do that? Like it didn't
mean anything, or you got caught up in it, and
then you punish yourself, and then I'm wondering, like persevere,
I guess would just be continuing the relationship or like.
Speaker 4 (19:22):
Like the persevering like obsession over making it want like
wanting it to stop. Oh I see, Like the perseveration
is the perseveration of the thought we're.
Speaker 2 (19:33):
Talking about brain spiraling, yes, like yeah, yes, okay, okay,
Well that's not I mean right, like, like how do
we get that?
Speaker 1 (19:42):
Well?
Speaker 4 (19:43):
I think it's it's you know, letting yourself feel it
and know that it's not going to be like that
forever anything else. But I think part of what happens
is we we try to not regret, and then then
the not regretting it lasts longer. Like you just you that, Okay,
I'm just going to package it up and move forward
and then then I won't ever have to regret it.
Speaker 2 (20:04):
It'll eat you up inside though, it'll come back come
at you. And they ask, Yeah, I did some research
and there's top ten commonness life regrets. To do it
I think is a lot of fun. So number one
is not pursuing your true passions or your dreams.
Speaker 4 (20:20):
I think sometimes when you're pursuing your passions, like you
get so compulsive about trying, especially in something that's like
so hard to pursue. Yeah, you get so compulsive that
you kind of act a little irrationally.
Speaker 2 (20:35):
Yeah. Like number two, let's go, it's called it's wasting
time on the wrong relationships. I've been there.
Speaker 6 (20:44):
I stayed a little too long, hoping things would change
in a year past, and then another year past, and
then finally had the courage to to walk away.
Speaker 2 (20:52):
But what gave you the courage? Did he did he
do something?
Speaker 1 (20:56):
No?
Speaker 6 (20:57):
I think it was just a combination of everything And honestly,
me looking at the clock and looking how much time
was wasted, yeah, and just being like, no, I'm going
to put myself first. I deserve better. I had the
moment that you had in the car and was able
to leave and take my time back good.
Speaker 4 (21:14):
Which is great because now you don't have to regret that.
You don't regret the like not having done that. I
think what's interesting that you said about the situation is
sometimes your big moments aren't perpetuated by some big catalyst.
Sometimes it's just I've finally had enough, And it's not
(21:36):
always because he or she cheated on me, right, it's
just your body and your mind and your soul all
link up to say I'm done.
Speaker 2 (21:44):
Yeah, Like I should have done this when I was
I had a porch party and I was dating a guy.
He drank too much. I had a friend who was
doing tarot card readings and I thought, yeah, go go
give give him to the guests, like let's do it.
And he comes. He comes out at the end of
the party. He's almost like mad and anger and crying.
(22:05):
He's like why would even tarot carvings? Like it's it's
so dumb, and like why did I have to help
your friend Lara, Like with the with the barbecue and
I had to get like my friend to drink and
I was like, I was in shock. I was like,
is this guy complaining because he had to help out
at a barbecue out like pass And I'm telling you, Erica,
that's a huge regret. I was like, I'm sorry that
(22:27):
you feel so overwhelmed. I don't know what I did
wrong to make you feel that overwhelmed. Like I was
an idiot. I was idiot, and you were also just
like in the moment, Shocks still stayed with that with
that em Ra effort for like a month, only a month.
I'm not going to go into it with years.
Speaker 3 (22:45):
No, actually she's still with him.
Speaker 2 (22:48):
It was bad. It was bad. So that's definitely a gret.
I've definitely been there.
Speaker 4 (22:52):
But that's but I think that's really cool for people
listening or watching, is that like you had both this
like awesome, you know, power moment of saying I deserve
better and this other moment where you look back you're like,
oh wait, why was I taking that when it was him?
That shows you that you're a fucking human being?
Speaker 2 (23:10):
Yeah, I really am. And honestly, the other one that
says working too much missing out in life cable. Oh yeah, yeah,
I even still feel like sometimes I do it now,
but I agree with you Younger, When I was younger,
I did it a lot. Oh. I was obsessed with
working and to the point like my friends were like,
you need to have light work life balance. And then
(23:32):
that's how I ended up dating a bunch of like
lame people because I felt compelled to to date. It
didn't matter who like, it was just like, all right, fine,
let's make this happen. Right. The next few are not
express your feelings, not taking more risks you were, letting
fear dictate your decisions, not standing in touch with friends,
caring too much about what others think, not prioritizing your
(23:56):
hell sooner, and then not being present or enjoying the moment.
So I feel like with all of those I do,
I tend to do a pretty good job staying in
touch with friends because I feel like when I get
out of touch with them, you can become really isolated,
and then you feel like you've gone so far without
touching base that it's almost like you can't get back.
Speaker 3 (24:18):
Yeah you know, Yeah, it takes a moment, and for.
Speaker 2 (24:21):
Me, definitely care way too much about what other thinks,
especially when I was younger, but now I'm like, eh,
screw it. Now we're tired, fuck off, tired to care.
This is me and whatever, and like I don't just
if you like it or not, like that's why you like.
Speaker 3 (24:36):
Me and my team of sweater you don't.
Speaker 2 (24:38):
And what I'm hearing from all of this, though, is
that which is like, definitely is some of the research
that we did.
Speaker 4 (24:45):
People most regret what they didn't do. They're in action
and a lot of what you just said is like
like the not prioritizing health or not taking not being present,
or it's like letting fear dictate. It's like the same
idea would be like not leaning in to my fearlessness
or willingness to take risks.
Speaker 2 (25:04):
Absolutely, Like that's why I did stand up for two years.
I was scared my first show and then I was like,
oh it's fun. Yeah, and then I was like I
don't really like it anymore, moved on.
Speaker 3 (25:13):
But so at least you knew instead of but I
did it ever known?
Speaker 2 (25:17):
Yeah? Yeah, I did it. Okay, so we got to
do regriver, let's do it. So, so what is something
that you wish you never texted? God?
Speaker 3 (25:30):
I don't remember anything.
Speaker 6 (25:32):
I have so many examples. Oh my god, it's embarrassing
how many times I've misfired a text or an email,
many of which I should not discuss publicly.
Speaker 3 (25:45):
So she's going to I've.
Speaker 6 (25:47):
Done it in work situations. I've done it in relationship situations.
I've done it in family situations. You think I would
have learned my lesson one time I did it. We
have this friend group that all came together through our
kids club soccer. So the boys were like ten, they're
all in their twenties now, but we became such close
friends with this group of people. We all still get together.
(26:10):
We go on vacations with these people, We celebrate holidays
with these people. We are a tight group. And we
were all hanging out one night and two of the
kids of the other parents I thought were being little dicks.
So then everybody leaves. I go to text Dave, I
go to text my ex husband, and I say, I
cannot believe the way so and so and so and
(26:32):
so we're talking to their parents.
Speaker 1 (26:34):
They are such little assholes. The disrespect is astonishing.
Speaker 3 (26:38):
I know where this is going.
Speaker 6 (26:40):
I hit sends in the bubble turns green, and I
was like, why is the bubble turning green? The bubble
only turns green when we're on the group chat. I
sent this to Dave, I sent it to the old chat,
and I just in that moment, the whole bottom dropped out,
and I said, I just.
Speaker 1 (26:55):
Blew up our friendship with all these people. I just
blew it up.
Speaker 6 (26:58):
So I immediately get her on the phone and I say,
I am so sorry, I'm so sorry.
Speaker 1 (27:02):
Thank god. She's laughing. Her husband picks up. He gets
on the phone. He goes, oh my god, you're freaking out.
You're freaking out. They're all laughing. They think it's hilarious.
Speaker 3 (27:11):
I mean, that's a cool response.
Speaker 6 (27:12):
Well, and it was just so we laugh about it
to this day because their whole thing was like we
just kept thinking about how much you were freaking out
that you fucking did that, and we thought it was
the most hilarious thing.
Speaker 4 (27:25):
It could have been way worse because it could have
been war plans.
Speaker 2 (27:29):
Oh good, But I guess that's like not a big
deal now. Yes, Wow, I thought you said you had
a fashion regret that you you were you thought you
had or whatever. There didn't. In high school, I remember
at a dance. I mean I owned it at the time,
(27:49):
but I was wearing these like white like pearly pants,
and I had space buns in the hair, and I
had these like high like white like sneaker things, and like.
Speaker 3 (28:04):
It was just like a lot of glitter.
Speaker 1 (28:06):
It was.
Speaker 2 (28:06):
It was if like my little pony had exploded all
over me. I love this for you right now. Like
if you walked into a club in La here, you know,
the people would be like, that's fire.
Speaker 3 (28:15):
But you just said something that would never happen.
Speaker 2 (28:18):
I know me neither. We're not going off into a club. Well,
we'll go to a bar and I want you to
rewear that. Would you do that and wear it on
the podcast?
Speaker 7 (28:25):
Oh?
Speaker 3 (28:25):
Hell yeah no?
Speaker 2 (28:26):
But like we surely create the photo, we'll read the photo,
but then you have to wear the outfit on the
next time we record it. Oh sure, hell yeah, and
then all sweater. Okay, I'll get there.
Speaker 4 (28:38):
I think I still had circulation back then, so it's
probably like a small tank top or even worse, a
tube top.
Speaker 2 (28:44):
A tube top. Oh god, number tube tops. I can't
wear them. I don't want to. Absolutely get the hell out.
Speaker 3 (28:50):
A tubetop is basically just a headband.
Speaker 2 (28:52):
But remember when when tubetops, when people would wear tubetops
and they would have the bikini line tanline, and that
was cool. You're like, I gotta go get a tansel.
When I wear the tube top, they see that I've
been tanning, and apparently it's sexy.
Speaker 4 (29:06):
Whenever, listen, it's not. It's not sexy.
Speaker 2 (29:09):
It's not. I could see the line of the Baane suit.
I don't know why that makes you want to take
your clothes off. I don't when you could have.
Speaker 3 (29:15):
Easily just worn a cap sleeve and call it a day.
Speaker 2 (29:18):
Thank you. Okay. So I have a funny regret where
I just think like why was I like this? Right?
So I need you to think like why was I
like this?
Speaker 3 (29:27):
Okay, I'll give it to you.
Speaker 2 (29:28):
I was linking second grade. I wanted a retainer so bad.
Speaker 3 (29:32):
Why.
Speaker 2 (29:33):
I don't know why. No one knows why I wanted
it so bad. So I got spearmint gum and I
twirled it and twirled it and twirled it and I
put it like around my key salt looked like a retainer. Okay,
it was there all day. I am not joking. I
would move it with my tongue and keep it there,
and I remember just getting cavities from your spearmint gum.
(29:55):
I mean it was it was like it was like
one or two days. I remember the kids and meanwhile
around I was so happy. I was like, yeah, I'm
a retainer. Like it made me like cool, Like he's
like nobody else had a I'm telling you, I don't
know did you know kids that had You said you
saw kids with retainers and you wanted them A couple
a couple, but I don't think any of them were
in my class. And the only the one weird memory
(30:17):
that I have is I think his name was mister Ronsky,
like leaning down and being like, oh, let me look
at it, and I was like yeah, smiling, he's so
close to my face and he just went, oh, yeah,
it looks good. Nice retainer. He didn't say like, maybe
you should remove the gum from your teeth that's been
marinating there for almost two days. He literally went with it.
(30:39):
And I'm like, bro, good job on being like, you
could have called me de Lulu if you wanted and
said we can all tell this is spearmint gum, but
he didn't.
Speaker 3 (30:49):
You know what that was?
Speaker 4 (30:51):
That was quality of life minus envy. You had too
much envy? Yeah, and so you were, but then you
were happy when you had the spearmint gum.
Speaker 2 (31:00):
It's true. I would know we were happy, so happy.
I was so happy. So do you have one? It's like,
oh I was, I like this. Yeah, it's it's a
regret that I was able to have and then process
and move on. I regret that I didn't get on
meds earlier. Absolutely a big pro med ditto podcast. Med
me up right, I don't care how many I have
to take, give them to me. Yeah, possible.
Speaker 4 (31:22):
We know you're fifty seven fifty seven seven supplements, but meds, meds, No,
but meds rates right right right. I remember Friendy Wendy
saying she was like, oh my god, I was tired
of like white knuckling through life. And then I understood
what she meant when I got on meds, and I
was like, oh, it is too fucking short to be like,
(31:42):
to be spending all of this energy.
Speaker 2 (31:45):
That sad or mad or whatever like whatever.
Speaker 4 (31:48):
Feeling of you know, angst and like just emotional depletion.
Speaker 3 (31:53):
It's not worth it.
Speaker 4 (31:55):
No, And then you're like, oh, I can be there.
I can be there for my family. I can be
there from my friends, I can be there for myself.
And if a doctor is telling me like, hey, yeah,
this is what I think you should do, and like,
why the fuck not right?
Speaker 2 (32:08):
I don't know why people were walking around any prival
about like I don't take anything. I'm fine. I'm like,
are you though? Really? On the inside, I doubt it.
But then you do it and you're like, oh, man,
I regret not doing this sooner exactly. I'm right there
with you now, I gotta know, is it. I'm gonna
put this in a way where I'm like, there's righteous
regret where you feel like like where you maybe don't
(32:30):
have to apologize to someone that you feel like it
will just say toxic.
Speaker 8 (32:36):
Right.
Speaker 2 (32:36):
I feel like I do have a good righteous regrets. Okay,
they hear it where I'm like, no, I don't. I
don't know I did it at all. I did it
right a little bit. Maybe you're saying that maybe you
should feel a little regret.
Speaker 3 (32:47):
Is that what you're saying?
Speaker 2 (32:48):
Yeah, And I don't not at all. Even now. My
my uncle was living with me me, I believe to
my grandma, I was very young. I think I was
like eight or nine, he was like on draw ugs
and he's whacking do He comes in the house and
he steals from my grandma's purse and my grandma is
calling him out in the kitchen and he's yelling at her,
(33:11):
getting really loud and like when he's when you're on
like cocaine or crack or whatever f he was on,
Like you know, he's going whack and me, I'm not
into those meds. Just we're not into those meds. MEA
Lisa is like literally she's just a little one. You know,
she's like five to one at this point. I think
I'm probably taller than her. He gets so loud and
up in her face. I grab the frying pan and
(33:33):
I whacked him over the head with it one hand.
I couldn't because I couldn't. He was so close to
her that I will go from zero to sixty if
you f was somebody that And that is a thing
that I've talked about on this podcast before. Don't come
for an animal in front of me, and don't come
for somebody to care about, because I will become a liability.
(33:54):
And I was eight and nine and I was a liability.
I grabbed it. I was so mad I was like
stop and I just was like whacked him right over
that he didn't die, He kind of fell back into
the fridge. And that's like kind of the most that
I remember. This is an insane First of all, why
would you regret that? I don't because you were like
(34:14):
a superhero. It's such a like who would notice? That's
like a cartoon. You were like living like you were
like real life.
Speaker 4 (34:20):
And a cartoon, and you were protecting someone that like
having the you know, yeah, the courage and the awareness
of what was happening.
Speaker 3 (34:29):
How old were you?
Speaker 2 (34:30):
I was like eight or nine. That's that's crazy because
I mean, I guess I'm saying like that's admirable. Okay,
this is good because I guess.
Speaker 4 (34:39):
I'm now promoting violence. But at the same time, your
Abelita was in danger.
Speaker 2 (34:43):
Yeah, and that's that's so.
Speaker 5 (34:45):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (34:45):
I think is that even righteous regret?
Speaker 2 (34:48):
Though I know I maybe not, but I think maybe
other people. Let's say he died, yes, it would be right.
Speaker 3 (34:54):
I don't think. I don't know. My vote is it
was good. I'm glad she did it.
Speaker 2 (34:59):
So does anger ever help you move through like regret faster? Right?
I think so? Because anger propels you forward as opposed
to sadness kind of keeps you in the same spot.
Speaker 4 (35:14):
It gives you kind of like stace. It like in
staceis anger is like I you know, it's an energy
lift because it's like you're you know what I mean,
you have to get it out and you have to
do something. Yeah, So I do think it helps you
get over regret.
Speaker 2 (35:28):
I do too. I think like as long as like
what we talk about in getting into allowing your anger
or your rage getting out in a safe way, I
don't go to the gym, take a run, punch a pillow,
realizing that that can help really like kick your butt
into into just get over it. It's that shouldn't ruin
(35:49):
or take over your life, this one little regret because
I guarantee you the other person ain't think about it
totally and you've got life to live now. So now
your regret is potential giving you more regret exactly because
up your time, because you're not because you're not like, Okay,
I'm honoring the fact that I did this thing. I'm
not proud of it, but I'm going to learn from
(36:10):
it and move on. Then not moving on is actually
worse than almost like not regretting at all, so which
I think they're not right. Weirdly, the not regretting is
what can lead you to eventually not actually moving on.
Speaker 3 (36:23):
You know, there's like moving on, and then there's really
moving on.
Speaker 2 (36:26):
You know you're like mad at yourself for not having
left that person, or you're.
Speaker 3 (36:30):
Mad yourself for not having done that.
Speaker 2 (36:31):
Well, now you have the opportunity to do it now,
like if you're still with the person, do it now.
You can take comfort in it in that in the
fact that everyone has regret. You can also laugh at yourself, like,
oh god, this how stupid. Like when I got a
note so wrong at a cruise ship audition, I wanted
(36:51):
to die. I wanted to crawl in a hole and die.
And now I just go, it's fine. You were nervous,
you didn't hit the right notes. And also you just
have to remember the past. Time heals all wounds in
relationships and with regret, and like they're not They're never
as ugly as you think they are.
Speaker 4 (37:07):
Like I know everyone thinks that everyone remembers like the
ugly parts of someone, but it's actually the opposite. I
remember like the standout moments.
Speaker 2 (37:16):
You remember, the more fun things, and I think that
we need to learn to love ourselves through all of
those flawed things. That makes us who we are. And
there are people who love us with with both with
the good and the flawed. So it's like, have your
graditional love there, you have it, and have it for yourself.
Speaker 4 (37:35):
The point is, like, I think that's where we miss
the botalize, having unconditional love for ourselves.
Speaker 2 (37:40):
You got to tell me about come to the wed
it's a weak tell me.
Speaker 3 (37:44):
Okay, So we know that this year Pope Fran.
Speaker 2 (37:51):
Has passed, right, You did know that, right, Tara, Yeah,
you did know that there was a pope.
Speaker 3 (37:57):
Yeah, it's not Tara doesn't doesn't.
Speaker 4 (38:00):
Read the news. I knew it's intentional. We we are
fine with it.
Speaker 2 (38:04):
I think I knew it. Maybe didn't care. Not ticked
up on a calendar saying, oh wow, Pope died, but
I'm with you.
Speaker 3 (38:10):
So Peyfran out Okay.
Speaker 2 (38:12):
Everybody talked about it, right, it was like saturated the news. Yeah.
Speaker 4 (38:17):
What also happened in that same time is a young
woman by the name of Sister Na Kanabajo. Cool name
is Brazilian. She's a Brazilian nun. The oldest living woman.
She died at one hundred and seventeen. That's bad ass. Yeah,
(38:38):
I agree, And I was reading about her and like
even as of a year before she died, like in
an interview she said, I'm young, pretty and friendly.
Speaker 2 (38:48):
Oh my god, I love her. Right, she is what
we aspire all to be. I mean, I'm not one
hundred and seventeen, and I don't even think of myself
as like I'm young, pretty and friendly. She was one
hundred and sixteen, and we are, we are young pretty.
Speaker 3 (39:02):
I mean, like what, like so cool?
Speaker 2 (39:03):
Like this is literally a year before she died and
she was so old but like clearly still so young
in her heart. Yeah, it's so cool to learn about her,
Like she didn't get cataract surgery until she was one
hundred and six. People get cataract surgery when they're like forty, right,
But you got to tell me, like, did do you
have facts about what she did like for a living
(39:24):
or with her life?
Speaker 4 (39:25):
She helped the poor, she helped like disenfranchise people.
Speaker 2 (39:28):
Yeah, she did some good Jews, which we love, and
the good Jews can get you far in life.
Speaker 4 (39:33):
She overtook the oldest woman like there had been the
oldest woman who was a Japanese woman who had been
alive before the Titanic sunk. The oldest woman ever was
one hundred and twenty two.
Speaker 2 (39:45):
Wow.
Speaker 3 (39:46):
She like basically smoked and drank.
Speaker 2 (39:48):
She love it. There's no signs behind why people die early,
dilate why that we get campers.
Speaker 3 (39:54):
Well, that is one. There's one through line. There is
sign through line. It's all women.
Speaker 2 (40:00):
Yeah, and I really think a big part of that is,
like men, you need to get some friends when you
get older. Okay, you need to get some fucking friends.
And we want that for you.
Speaker 3 (40:11):
It's really easy. Phone a friend.
Speaker 2 (40:13):
Just phone a friend, phone a friend, have some community bill.
Speaker 4 (40:16):
You will be sit alone, you won't be so sad,
and then physiologically you might last a little bit longer. Yeah,
you gotta let your feelings out. It's a us about
not letting your feelings out. You don't talk about your
feelings exactly.
Speaker 2 (40:27):
You got to build the village, have thoughts about it,
be vulnerable and be open.
Speaker 1 (40:31):
It's time to wrap it up. This is our goodbye.
Speaker 2 (40:35):
Well we got to.
Speaker 8 (40:36):
Know what that is.
Speaker 10 (40:37):
Let's get our pillows, ladies, Let's dry pillow and don't
forget your branded pillows, you know, give us five stars,
give us a light, give us a comment, tell us
like what you regret, and like, if you have any.
Speaker 2 (40:49):
Any of those stories, we would really love to hear them.
Speaker 4 (40:53):
And if there was anything that you found that really
worked to get over something, Yeah, that was that was
you know, staying with you deep
Speaker 6 (41:00):
Breath in you guys, let it out, Scream into your
pullout wom
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