Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:03):
There is. I don't coach for trophies. It's amazing to
get trophies. I don't coach for trophies. That coach to
change these kids lives and to challenge them and to
believe in them, and to be a mentor for life
for these kids competing at anything. Guess you where you
want to go. I don't cap his business. I don't
care what it is. Go find the best. China lats
out to him. We'll find the past, next person and
(00:23):
go learn from that. This is the Reformed Sports Project,
a podcast about restoring healthy balance and perspective in all
areas of sports through education and advocacy. Hi, this is
Nick Bonacoort from the Reform Sports Project podcast. Joining me
today is coach Dan mulrooney, head football coach at and
Maria College, named e CFC Coach of the Year. Coach.
(00:46):
Mulrooney took a team that finished one and nine back
in two thousand and sixteen and transform them into a powerhouse,
leading them to their first conference championship and n c
A playoff. Birth in Dan, thanks for hopping on, co
appreciate you man. Yeah, thanks, Nick, this is amazing. I'm
really honored to be on the podcast with you are.
You're doing a great job really highlighting some great things,
so I appreciate it. I know your voice isn't perfect.
(01:09):
You just came off of a freaking unbelievable season. Recap
us real quick on where your football team is now,
what you just accomplished, and will kind of dive in. Yeah, man,
I mean we literally went worse the first and about
three seasons. It's one of those Cinderella stories. It's really
just just an amazing feet I'm not boasting my own
horn here too much, but you know, it came into
(01:29):
the program in seen program at seven teen players total,
seventeen total players at a college, seventeen total players in
the college, and the previous coach I got fired in
the middle of the season. Uh. They started the program
in two thousand nine and never really got off their feet.
We had seven teen players at the school when I
had my first team meeting, and I looked around and
I said, you know what, it's gonna be a hell
(01:50):
of a story. And you know, three years later he
got a hundred freshmen, you know, hundred sophomores, hundred juniors
and really built it the right way. And then this
season here. It just went seven in two and got
the n C Double A playoffs, became conference champs. So
just an unbelievable story. Super proud of my coaches and
my players at the school and just sticking with it.
(02:11):
Just perseverance, determination. One of those things you read about it.
Are you seeing the movies? Man? This is awesome. There's
a couple of things I want to dig in here.
First of all, congratulations to you and the staff and
the players. Man, I see the pictures, the tweets. I mean,
the energy is ridiculous. You can just see the joy
and these young men and coaches and yourself obviously creating
memories for life. But you know, the first little background
(02:31):
about you. One of the best players that ever played
in the state of Connecticut, certainly in our area growing
up of Waterbury, went to BC, went to Stony Brook,
played at a high level. You know, obviously one of
the best players in the state of Connecticut at that time.
So success and working and being gritty, it's something you're
not unfamiliar with. But I gotta tell you, you know,
I'm pretty sure this was your first head coaching job.
You look at the roster, seventeen players, what the hell
(02:52):
made you take the job? Yeah, you know, I was
a young guy. I was twenty seven years old. I
had just started coaching my first job with Chris Robertson
at the e P. I got a stony brook after
my playing career, didn't know exactly what to do after school.
It was an idea that when it was presented to me,
I said, you know what, if someone could do it, it
it could be me. Um. It was exciting to take
it as a young guy. I think I was the
(03:13):
youngest that coach in the country at the time. But
you know, I think it's just something that you really
just embody. You know, something that you just you felt
right at the time when I took it and was
it you know, it could be your last head coaching job.
A lot of people said I can't win, there, can't
do it, and that motivated me as a person. I
know you and you know me. I'm a ultra competitor
in every sense of the word. It's just, you know
(03:33):
something that that drove me. I think is the key.
One thing. I really want to dig in with you
here when I see those pictures, want to see the
video on you on your school's Twitter feed and the
football feed and of course you're the joy man. The camaraderie,
the love that not only you guys have, but the
kids have for each other. And I know from my experience, man,
I've been on losing teams. I was fortunate to be
on a national championship team in college. And when I
(03:54):
got there, the head coach at the time, Mike Fox,
Hall of Famer coach at University of North Carolina for
twenty plus years of in baseball, he had built this
culture where it didn't need to be said by him,
right the seniors the juniors. Ever, Like when I came
in as a freshman, you just kind of fell in line.
I don't even know how to explain another than it
was just you just go there and you expect to win.
I think if you've ever been a part of that,
(04:15):
you know what, It's really hard to express in words.
You just kind of fall in line. But how do
you build that? Right? So it sounds to me and
I look at your pictures with these kids, I'm like, man,
they got a culture here. How do you get them
to buy and how do you build that team chemistry,
that camaraderie. Yeah, I think you know you nailed on
the head, Nick, I mean, don't explain your philosophy, embody it,
believe it. The best way to be a leader is
(04:35):
to lead by example. You have to have this energy
that just exudes out of you. On Friday night before
the game, it was senior day. We had seniors. We
had an emotional three hour meeting. Every senior talked, emotions
were high. How much love and passion we have for
the game without recruit players. The first thing I asked
him over anything else, is how much do you love football?
And if the thing that I had the mouth is
I can't live without it, I tell him not to
(04:58):
come here. I want players. Is that love it? Like
really love it and with passion and not love like
a like a now, but love like a verb. You
know what are they're willing to sacrifice? What they're willing
to give, you know, to me, to the program, to
the to the game. And that's really what you need
to be a college athlete. It doesn't matter that the
level you play, It matters how much you're willing to give.
And I think that the emotions that you saw on
(05:18):
the videos, those are real, man. I mean the confetti
going up, the crying, the love, the sharing the culture.
To me, culture is an oversaid word, I think in sports,
to me cultures, if you speak the same language with someone, Right,
if I went into France and obviously I'm speaking English,
you know I'm not part of that culture. You know.
But if you come into our program and you talk
about ring the bell, and you talk about the key
(05:38):
words that we use, and you talk about family, you
talk about the things that we use in our program,
we all speak the same language every single day, and
we're connected to each other and connected teams win championships.
I've been a part of four championship teams. Um, you know,
when we're all all in one big group chat together
and we're all talking every day, and those are the
special things I'm making and I think that's why we want. Man,
(05:59):
I'm getting goose bump. So I was fortunate to be
a part of two championship teams and everything you're saying,
I'm like, man, I know that feeling, and I think
until you go through that, it's really hard to It's
just it's something special. It's being a part of something
greater than yourself. And I try to preach that it's
an interesting time, right. A lot of this scene, and
I'm talking about the youth amateur scene. May not be
specifically for football maybe, but there's a lot of showcasing
going on. I gotta get mine, I gotta put myself
(06:20):
on a pedestal to get seen. How do you manage
that as a fifteen, sixteen, seventeen year old kid going
on social media so that you can be seen while
at the same time being a team guy. I mean,
is it possible, you know, to be someone out there
self promoting but at the same time being all in
for your team. Yeah. I think it's who taught you
the game, right, what youth coach, what high school coach
(06:43):
you know, really taught you the game? How you're raising
I think it's such an important aspect. It's very hard
for these young kids, young people on society today when
everything's instant gratification. I think the hardest part, you know,
obviously I thought in love with Division three sports, obviously
coaching here in the last Division three the last nine years,
but before that I didn't know much about it aviously
being at the higher level of FPS programs fcs UM.
(07:03):
I think it's a lot to do with how your race,
you know, what you're looking for in sports. I think
a lot of the young people right now are interested
in going d one. Um the preferred walk on deals are?
You know? Interesting to me? That preferred walk on thing
is something that I will never probably understand, and who
invented that? I don't really understand either. I think it's
like going to a place to buy some clothes and saying,
(07:23):
you know what, it's not just a hundred bucks, is
actually two hundred dollars for you and it actually doesn't
fit you? Do you still want it? And people saying yes,
you know it doesn't make a lot of sense in
that regard, Like the going somewhere where it doesn't fit
you, you you have to go to a place where the
coaches talk to your language, where the coaches are gonna
lead you, and mentorship because college is about growth and
self improvement, that's all it is. No one's gonna remember
(07:44):
if you're played or not in ten years. Don't gonna
care about that stuff. But what they're gonna care about
is how are your mentor who challenged you, who believed
in you, and who loved you. That about the process,
And I think, you know, that's what we have here.
I think that's what I do in a daily basis.
I want to be the coach I never had. I
had a lot of great coaches about the time I
played and coached, but you know, I think those things
are important, and understanding that the people make the place,
(08:06):
that the fit has to make sense. You know, don't
go to a place just because they have a nice
weight room, right, nice field. You know, go to a
place because the fit is right. And I think that's
a parents they to understand throughout the process. Do you
bring up a great point, a whole D one or bustling.
I love talking about this and it's interesting because you know, um,
I was a D three guy and I chose my
school for a multitude of reasons. Um number one, it
was a championship caliber program at the DC level and
(08:28):
and I got to play for legendary coaches and all that.
But it was perfect for me. I remember looking at
it my freshman year and I remember going to watch
the team play as a senior, I was getting recruited
and there were top three in the country and I'm
watching it, going, yeah, these guys are good, but I
think I can compete here like I can play here.
It felt like I had to push myself, but I
felt like, all right, worst case scenario. I think if
(08:49):
I have to come in as a freshman and earn
my stripes, I'll have three sellon years of being an
impact player. I really think I can do that. I
don't know how kids. I had two older brothers that
played college sports, and I would is lucky to have
parents that work, you know, rational, you know what I say, rational,
Like I don't even remember talking about divisions, like I
really don't. Again, this is but you were, you know,
(09:09):
one of the top athletes in the state, right you
were being recruited by how our five schools. Not everyone does.
So how do kids get that pipe dream out of
their mind and start getting a little realistic without feeling
like they're selling themselves short? My personal opinion is to
try your hardest to be the best high school football
player you could be and enjoy your time. I mean,
a lot of it comes down to fate, you know,
(09:30):
to genetics, to whatever it may be. And that's that's
hard for young people understand. Um. You know, I think
the hardest part is to realize that they're not going
to nafel at a young age, because you know, you
grew up your whole life and your first grade teacher
says you could be an astronaut, and you know, I
mean a lot of these kids can't be, you know,
but I think there's a there's a dream that is
great to have dreams and have visions and things like that,
(09:50):
but enjoying the process is something that they need to do.
You could sell, promote, you could be the best person
on Instagram, have the most followers, make your own videos,
things like that. But you know, if it's meant to be,
it's meant to be. And I do believe that if
you're the best player in the state, you're the best
player in your high school team, do you end up
running the fourth four and go to camps and go
to clinics and get noticed a little better, There's definitely
gonna be more opportunity. So I'm not selling anyone short
(10:13):
dreams or visions or anything like that. But you know,
at the end of the day, playing at the next
level should be the top priority, not where you're playing.
I mean, the next level is the next level regardless,
and whatever is best for you and for your family,
and depending on the location and how it could help
your future and the right price, I think it's the key.
So it's being realistic, but it's also working hard to
achieve as high as you can go. A topic that
(10:35):
comes up, I love talking about it and I have
always preached. Did I say this to my kids, like,
don't be concerned when coaches on my back. Coach won't
stop nagging me. He's saying I'm not doing this or
not doing that or whatever. I'm like, dude, get concerned
when coach and saying a word. Yeah, you know, like
when a coach is correcting or pushing you out of
your comfort zone in a positive way. I don't mean
(10:56):
like physically pushing. What I'm saying is, you know, challenging
you to get better, you know, challenge you to become
more disciplined, to be more focused. Take it as a compliment.
When you talk about love for your players as a coach,
do those things meaning challenging kids trying to get the
most out of them? Is that love? I agree? I
look at love is not a noun, but a better brand.
(11:17):
I said that before. Love is how much you're willing
to give, right, how much you're willing to trust. And
I think trust and what you're able to give another person.
I end almost every conversation with our players that I
meet with one on one with I love you, man,
he said, I love you to coach, And it's not
you know the song I love my wife, it's the
I trust you. I'm willing to give you everything. I
got your back, you know. And I think that's such
(11:39):
an important aspect as a coach. I mean, your number
one job is to challenge them. Like you said before,
it's a challenge them, to believe in them, and to
love them. And I think those three things get all
contorted when you're so focused on the results, you know,
and you're focused on championships as I don't coach for trophies.
It's amazing to get trophies. I don't coach for trophies.
I to change these kids lives and to challenge them
(12:02):
and to believe in them, and to be a mentor
for life for these kids. I was so emotional Friday
night when I was talking to my players because I said,
I hope you called me in ten years when you
get married. I hope you'll call me when you buy
a house. I hope I'm part of your life forever.
I'm getting emotional talking about now to be honest, nick Um,
I want to be part of these kids livest forever.
I'm indebted to them for sticking with me for five years.
(12:23):
And that relationship, and I know you know this, that
relationship you have with your top coach or your favorite coach.
I mean, that's there's no beating that. That's life long,
you know. And I think I tell my team all
the time the gratification of this championship. Who was in
the doing wasn't in the results, you know. And the
reason we care so much is because we failed for
so long, you know, we endured so much and it
(12:45):
was so it was just like God is good type
thing of and we're talented team. Obviously talent wins games
and stuff like that. That that stuff takes care of itself.
But the actual connectiveness we have together, how much love
trust family. I guess you have to be here to
embody it. But I hope you saw a little glimpse
of it from the pictures. That's Dan mulrooney had football
coach and and Maria College. When we come back, coach
(13:08):
and I will discuss the importance of resilience and hard
work and his advice to high schoolers looking to play
football in college. Welcome back to the Reform Sports Project podcast.
Where coach mulrooney and I left off. We were about
(13:30):
to dive into the lessons learned when a player isn't
given the playing time they feel they deserve, as well
as coaches advice for how you could be the best
at what you do both on and off the field
here at all the time, right, And it's something that
I talked about a lot, and I think you can't
talk about it enough because as a parent, I know
you're a new parent and you and your wife congratulations,
and you'll be going through this stuff here soon at
(13:53):
some point. And it is easier to go through failure
as an individual as me or as you than it
is to watch your child. I mean it is, but
I think as a parent, my sports experience and knowing
I've how to endure certain challenges and go through bumps
in the road. But having now been on the other side,
it's easy to go, wow, I needed that or I
learned from that. But it's so easy, and it's not
(14:14):
just easy to try to put a pillow so your
kid doesn't fall down every time to protect them, which
in many ways we're supposed to do. But also, how
do we look at sports and say, hey, it's okay
if you're not starting on this team, we're not jumping ship.
There's a lesson to be learned here because on one
end you have all these showcases, clubs and teams going, hey,
(14:35):
you gotta get in the field, you gotta get seen,
you gotta get seen. So it's like on one shoulder,
a parents getting pushed when you gotta get in the field.
You gotta do this otherwise your kid's gonna get left behind.
And then you got coach Mulrooney, Nick Bonacorn, every other
damn coach I've interviewed saying failure is good. Who do
you trust? Who do you believe? Can you talk about that? Yeah?
I would. I think it's hard to say super focused
and have positive energy when no one's clapping for you.
(14:57):
And that's happened to me. I've never lost ever as
a coach. And you know, I come here and no
one clapp for me for three years and to stay positive,
to stay focused, this trust the process, it's coach Burbs.
I get that, But at the same time, it's it's resilience.
I think life's heard this quote, and I love it.
Life's not about holding all the good cards but playing
a poor hand. Well, I don't know if you're a
(15:18):
poker guy, I hear what you're saying. It's listen. I
didn't have the best talent in high school. I worked
at it. You know what I mean. I worked at it.
I didn't start as a freshman in high school. I
played freshman football. You know, I was one of the
best players ever playing Connecticut, but I played freshman football,
maybe a little j V sophomore year that played varsity
because I worked at it. But I was bummed out
my freshman year. I have these conversations every day. The
(15:40):
number one reason why players quit football. In my program.
You can win a championship this year, it should be
all goods and glamour, but it's about playing time. Coach.
I'm happy we won. We won five games in a row.
But I quit because I'm not playing and it's it's disheartening.
It's hard to hear. I understand it because I was
a player that didn't get the most playing time sometimes
(16:00):
at Boston College or at Stony Brook wherever I was.
But you know what, the lessons you learned throughout the process.
It's taught me so much about my life, you know
what I mean. And I think it's so hard to
sit there and watch. And I'm sure as a parent
it's even harder. Um and and I'll learned that one
day soon. But the absolute you know, a lot of
its fate and lot of it's this and that. But
(16:20):
the playing time aspect is hard. It's very hard for
a player to sit and wait his time. But listen,
everyone has to do it, and that's part of sports.
It's a great point, man, And there's lessons to be
learned through that coach. You got the mike, you know,
I want you to take as much time as you need.
But there are a lot of people out there sharing
their advice to kids, you know, on social media. I
tell them how to get looks, how to get seen. Here.
(16:41):
You are someone who played at the highest level of
college football is now coaching a championship team at the
D three level. Your career is, you know, obviously skyrocketing.
You've built something from the ground, you have all the experience.
What can these kids do to get on Dan Bulrooney's
radar and Maria College or any program? How can they
set themselves up? High school athletes to get to the
next level, to get seen and then to be able
(17:02):
to have success. It's a loaded question, but I'm gonna
try to answer it the best I can. Um be
the best person that you could be and improve on
daily things. I don't think you have to worry about
being at your ordinary and anything. I think you have
to worry about doing the ordinary things being everybody else.
You know, if you're focused on running a full one,
you're not going to run a full one. You know,
(17:23):
you have to work on making many goals every day,
creating that and having that experience of trying to hit
those goals throughout and you have to be focused. And
you know, I think the biggest thing for me, I
think growing up through it. Obviously it was a different age,
no Instagram, no Facebook, no recruiting websites, things like that.
But now that there is that, I see the experience
of that. If you're blessed enough to go to camps,
(17:46):
to go to clinics to learn, and it's really to
experience the best. You have to go against the best
to experience it. I'll tell one quick store and I'll
let you go. But I thought I was the best
football player to ever grace God's Earth. When I was
in high school and I was just when I was
a junior in high school, met anyone better than me.
I went to a camp at Yukon, went to Randy
(18:07):
Enzo football camp. I met anr Nandez. I went against
him and I couldn't cover him, and I was like,
what the heck is this? I've never met a person
I couldn't cover, couldn't run by, And for five hours straight,
me and him did one on ones by ourselves. All summer,
we worked out every day together. I got better because
I found best competition. Find the best competition. Me and
(18:29):
you were also blessed because we had older brothers. I
never played with a kid in my age until Hip
Hop Warner. I think that was a huge piece of
my my development, was always playing with a person four
years older than me. Competition is key in life. If
you have a mentor, if you look for someone to
look up to train with, to look for that's obviously
older better than You're gonna experience a different thing. You
always have to find the best person in the room
(18:51):
and latch onto him, no matter who it is. Get
out of your comfort zone to go find the best
person in your field, whoever it is. Right. When I
was a coach three years ago, I went to a
house state. I drove them all the way out there
to go knock on the door and see if I
could sit there for a week with Ryan Dayan and
remind those guys. And I did, and then let me
sit there for a week. That's freaking awesome, dude. And
I watched them for a week. I didn't want to leave.
I was so excited to be with them. But I
(19:13):
found out how the best do it right. And I
think that's the competitiveness that you need, because competing in
anything gets you where you want to go. I don't
care if it's business, I don't care what it is.
Go find the best, try to lats out into him.
We'll find the best next person and go learn from them.
If you can get that done, find the best player
in your state, start working out with them. You're gonna
become better. That's my advice. That's Dan mulrooney, had football
(19:35):
coach at and Maria College. Thanks for listening to the
Reformed Sports Project podcast. Dominick Boncourt and our goal is
to restore a healthy balance and perspective in all areas
of sports through education and advocacy. For updates, please follow
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website by searching for the Reformed Sports Project