The Angry White Guy

This week we meet Dan. Dan has reached the top of the heap. He stands atop the Citadel. 

Dan is a very powerful guy. The most powerful guy around. 

Dan has untold legions who hang on his every word. Who love to death is fiery rhetoric in support of White Supremacy and Male Dominion.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:04):
Welcome to the ten Minute Storyteller. That's me Bill Simpson,
your host, narrator and author. We hear at the ten
Minute Storyteller endeavor to entertain you with tall tales or
rendered swiftly and with the utmost empathy. We pledge to

(00:25):
pack as much entertainment, emotion, and exploration into the human
condition as ten minutes will permit. Mini novels on steroids.
This week we meet Dan. Dan has reached the top

(00:45):
of the heap. He stands atop the citadel. Dan. He's
a very powerful guy, the most powerful guy around. Dan
has untold legions who hang on his every word, love
to death, his fiery rhetoric in support of white supremacy
and male dominion. The angry old white guy Dan. He's

(01:16):
an old fart, saggy, paunchy, crappy, angry, constipated, pissed off
at his dead father, his ex wives, his present wife,
his children, his caddie, everyone who has ever worked for him,
who has ever made fun of him, who has ever
suggested that he might just be a horse's ass. He's

(01:38):
a narcissist and a hater. Hates everyone, including himself, hates
himself most of all, a kind of preacher politician preaches
the apocalypse, the end of times, insists only he can
save us from fire and eternal suffering. Look over there,

(02:01):
here he comes, just taking the pulpit to address his
true believers. Let's listen to what he has to say.
The world's corrupt. The men who run the world are corrupt,
corrupt and evil. They're women, are whores, their children parasites.
We need to cleanse the world of these evil men

(02:24):
and their whares. We need to make the world safe
again for good, law abiding, peace loving, down to earth
white folks, Christian white folks, New Testament Christian white folks
like you and me and our forefathers who founded this country,
who built it and made it great. All the rest

(02:44):
gotta go, or they gotta sign an oath saying they're
willing to be second class citizens, second class citizens who
kowtow to their true masters. From this day forward, I
pledge we will live in Whiteyville, Whitesburg, Whitestown, USA. We are,

(03:05):
after all, God's people, the chosen people send here to
conquer and control, to rule the earth, and all those
who trot upon it. I tell you, true friends and
fellow white folks, there will be no more tolerance, no
more melting pot, no more diversity, no more open arms,

(03:26):
no more riff raff sneaking across the border to steal
our jobs and rape our women and.

Speaker 2 (03:32):
Suck the tit of the welfare system. Those days are over.
We are going to shoot them dead on site. The
instant they step across the border, they will be shot
like rabbit dogs. And hear me, hear me when I
tell you. The same goes for gays, lesbians, transgenders, transvestites, liberals,

(03:53):
bleeding hearts, really, just about everyone who doesn't agree with me,
who doesn't take my word as the gospel, shot dead
on site. No miranda rights, no trial, no justice, just
a bullet in the head if you don't sing the
same beautiful hymns as you're great leader.

Speaker 1 (04:10):
Now, come on, people, let us pray. Dear God Almighty,
we love you, so we are committed to doing your work,
to subjugating all other colors, creeds, and ethnic groups in
the name of our beautiful just Christian deity Jesus Christ Amen.
An instant later, a shot rings out, and then a

(04:34):
second shot, and a third shot. The old fart Fall's over. Dead.
Bullet holes in his head and heart. He has almost
simultaneously declared a martyr, a savior, a man of the people,
a populist. His true believers demand justice, urge rebellion. A
revolution is predicted, but it doesn't happen. Nothing happens. Within

(05:00):
a few days, the old fart is forgotten, tossed onto
the garbage heap of history, and life goes back to
being the way it had always been. Okay, thanks for

(05:22):
listening to this original audio presentation of the Angry Old
White Guy, narrated by the author. If you enjoy today's story,
please take a few seconds to rate, review, and subscribe
to this podcast and go to Thomas William Simpson dot
com for additional information about the author and to view

(05:43):
his extensive cannon. A ten Minute Storyteller is produced by
Andrew Pigleisi and Josh Kawani and as part of the
Elvis Durand Podcast Network in partnership with iHeart Productions. Until
next time, this is Little Simpson. You're ten minute story Teller.