February 20, 2024 • 53 mins
Today, this is what's important:
Disturbed, baby boys, jerking off positions, the Super Bowl, Vegas, Blake's 21st birthday, Fruit Stripe gum, Hans Christian Anderson, and more.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Welcome to This Is Important, a production of iHeart Radio,
the show where we talk about what's obviously both critically
crucially important today on This Is.
Speaker 2 (00:13):
Important, standing up side of the bed t shirt on
no pants, fully engorged, shouting.
Speaker 3 (00:21):
For some reason, when I'm hungover, I always feel the
need to seed.
Speaker 4 (00:26):
I jerked off into TJ Maxwe's let's go. Hey, he hey,
we pay.
Speaker 2 (00:42):
Let's go.
Speaker 1 (00:44):
Do you feel that?
Speaker 4 (00:46):
Oh shit?
Speaker 2 (00:50):
All right, that's fifteen seconds?
Speaker 3 (00:52):
Is that?
Speaker 4 (00:53):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (00:54):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (00:54):
Dude? Yeah, posa dude that gets white people going in,
like Midwestern suburban whites. Whoo the whites? He are fired up?
Speaker 2 (01:08):
Did they play that at sports stadiums and stuff?
Speaker 3 (01:12):
That feels like a sports anthem?
Speaker 2 (01:13):
Have you? But have you? It feels like it. That's
I'm saying, but have you? Do we hear this?
Speaker 4 (01:17):
I haven't heard it?
Speaker 2 (01:19):
Why don't we? That's crazy?
Speaker 4 (01:20):
If you told me that the guy from Disturbed actually
did like lock children in his basement or something. I
don't know, but there has to be a reason we
don't hear that at stadiums.
Speaker 3 (01:32):
Go ahead, Adam, I'm the lead singer. Definitely they passed away.
I think the lead singer is dead.
Speaker 4 (01:38):
Oh really what was he a good guy? Or did
he lock kids in the basement? I mean he's a
lead singer of a band called Disturbed.
Speaker 2 (01:44):
Go ahead at him. Yeah, I feel like it was
disturbed in a way.
Speaker 4 (01:47):
I feel like, you know, there's a lot of things there.
Speaker 3 (01:50):
What if he was really well adjusted, well, then.
Speaker 4 (01:52):
I feel like you we would be hearing that at
every stadium.
Speaker 2 (01:55):
Disturb was talking about like the planet, not himself.
Speaker 4 (02:00):
The lead singer of Disturbed is still live, says Todd.
Speaker 3 (02:02):
Wait then who died?
Speaker 2 (02:04):
Oh I know who died? Lincoln Park?
Speaker 3 (02:06):
Oh there it is, no, I know Lincoln Park. And
also it was called like drowning pool, right there was.
There was a band and that ship was pretty fire too.
I got to look that up. I'll play the fort
fifteen seconds of it, all.
Speaker 2 (02:20):
Right, Adam, how you doing?
Speaker 4 (02:21):
I'm checking out. He doesn't seem that disturbed. He seems
just like a guy that has in a band, which
which is a little disappointing because if you name your
band disturbed, you gotta do some disturbing shit.
Speaker 3 (02:33):
For sure.
Speaker 2 (02:34):
You want him to walk the walk.
Speaker 3 (02:35):
Yeah, yeah, you gotta walk the walk.
Speaker 4 (02:37):
But I'm also like, well, why don't we hear that
song at every stadium. Then I want when when my
LA Clippers, when Kawhi Leonard, oh my god, dunks dunks
on a fool for it to go. Yeah, oh my god.
Speaker 3 (02:52):
These are so good. You know, we don't really deep
dive sports. And also this is two weeks out, so
who knows. They might not be for plays right now.
Anybody who cares anything about basketball, this might be the
Clippers year.
Speaker 4 (03:07):
That's what they're all saying. And guess what, I don't
like it. I don't.
Speaker 3 (03:11):
I don't like with that because you you are a
you are a cursed franchise. We do know that we are.
Speaker 4 (03:17):
We we certainly aren't.
Speaker 3 (03:19):
But this feels beyond the curse.
Speaker 4 (03:21):
You know, if it feels good. But if the first
game of the playoffs, uh, the entire team's knees explode,
that would make perfect sense.
Speaker 2 (03:32):
They're like jump ball. What just happened there?
Speaker 4 (03:35):
They all all to.
Speaker 3 (03:36):
The ground, their knees exploded. There's some seaport.
Speaker 4 (03:40):
Yeah, that would that would make a lot of sense.
Speaker 2 (03:42):
What's the furthest they've gone?
Speaker 4 (03:44):
In the Western Western Conference Finals? Was the furthest they've
gone they've gone? That was just a couple of years ago, which.
Speaker 3 (03:50):
To people who don't watch sports, that's right before the finals,
which is where you win it all.
Speaker 2 (03:56):
Whould they play Phoenix? Phoenix, Phoenix?
Speaker 4 (03:59):
I think it who Phoenix?
Speaker 3 (04:02):
Yeah? I love it. Well, good luck with that or
will you? Will you go to some playoff games if
that happens?
Speaker 4 (04:08):
Yeah, I mean we're the baby by this podcast. The
baby is I think thirteen years old.
Speaker 2 (04:14):
So dude, yeah, my kid is gonna be out.
Speaker 4 (04:18):
Yeah. So I'm celebrated. Man, thirteenth, thirteenth birthday?
Speaker 2 (04:22):
What's to man?
Speaker 4 (04:24):
Just jerking off a lot? Yeah? Yeah, okay, keep catching him.
He can't. He can't stop it.
Speaker 3 (04:32):
He's hey, your boy is disturbed. He is just now
that's disturbed. My god. I keep walking.
Speaker 2 (04:38):
Into he's fucking beating off into a tube sock. Yeah.
Speaker 4 (04:42):
Every every time I every time I see him jerking
off into a Kleenex or a tube sock, I go,
what are you doing?
Speaker 2 (04:55):
I go, oh, man, that is wild.
Speaker 3 (04:58):
Dude, You're gonna have a boy boys or way way crazy.
That's gonna be fun for you.
Speaker 2 (05:04):
I don't know what are you basing that on? Black? Yeah?
Speaker 4 (05:06):
What are you in the.
Speaker 3 (05:06):
Fact that I have girls and they're very well behaved,
but boys are psychos. I'm basing on myself. I jerked
off everywhere.
Speaker 2 (05:14):
It was amazing. Yeah, that's not psycho, that's just passing
the time.
Speaker 4 (05:17):
Yeah it's yeah, it's just jerking off. And by the way,
I feel like I wouldn't even be my dad. Every
time I was in the bathroom taking a shit, it's
like it's important. Absolutely every time I was in there
going to the bathroom, he would go, uh, quit jerking it.
You're gonna go blind through the bathroom door. And what's
(05:38):
funny is probably eighty five percent of the time he.
Speaker 2 (05:42):
Was right, right, it's the only way you could climbax.
Speaker 4 (05:45):
I'm not jerking off, Like stop, I'm not, But also
I am.
Speaker 2 (05:49):
I do. Like how like you go into the bathroom
just to take a shit and he's like, don't jerk
off in there.
Speaker 4 (05:54):
You're like, I'm not.
Speaker 2 (05:55):
And then you're like, I'm thinking a bad idea. Not
a bad idea.
Speaker 3 (06:00):
Were you sitting down to ship and jerking off in
sitting position? Because that's fucking disturbed.
Speaker 4 (06:07):
Yeah, what do you mean I jerk off in sitting positions? Wait,
I still do.
Speaker 2 (06:14):
Blake can only do it bending over looking backwards into him.
Speaker 4 (06:18):
You what what do you what do you mean, Blake?
Speaker 3 (06:23):
I don't I honestly, we got a stand there. I
probably could count on my hands.
Speaker 2 (06:31):
Wait, what is the same.
Speaker 3 (06:33):
I could probably count the number of times on my
hands how many times I've I've jerked off like in
sitting position, like sitting straight up?
Speaker 4 (06:41):
What are you talking about?
Speaker 5 (06:42):
So this is we're finding What I love about the
podcast is we just find out these little bit crazy
If you ever, if you ever want to find out
the most intimate details of your best friends lives, uh,
I start a podcast and do about one hundred and
ninety episodes.
Speaker 3 (07:00):
Yeah, yeah, you start to scrape the bottom of the bar.
Speaker 4 (07:03):
Then you really start to find out. You find out
that I started stand up while wiping, and that was
I mean, my god, we got a we got a
lot of mileage out.
Speaker 2 (07:12):
Of that was early.
Speaker 4 (07:13):
That was got a whole lot of mileage out of that.
Speaker 2 (07:16):
That's one of the pillars of this podcast.
Speaker 4 (07:18):
But this, but this, it actually disturbs me.
Speaker 2 (07:21):
You seem.
Speaker 4 (07:26):
I gotta get disturbed, be ready, because.
Speaker 2 (07:32):
Never sitting down? What Yeah, by the way, the saying
is I can count on one hand, but like.
Speaker 4 (07:38):
Yeah, hand on my hand. I got on my.
Speaker 2 (07:42):
Hand and you can only count with one hand.
Speaker 3 (07:45):
If I never jo in.
Speaker 2 (07:48):
The sitting position is seated position. What did you do
before like laptops and you were in front of a
desktop computer at like your parents' house.
Speaker 4 (07:56):
Yeah, yep, correct.
Speaker 2 (07:58):
Oh, so there were years I was sitting there?
Speaker 4 (08:00):
Am I bad?
Speaker 3 (08:01):
No?
Speaker 4 (08:02):
H corrects?
Speaker 2 (08:04):
No, I just you were standing, was standing so you
could like dart out the.
Speaker 4 (08:09):
I could see Blake being one of those weirdos who
didn't look at porn and would just like smell, like
he stole a girl's a girl's sweater and he would
just smell the sweater and then just jerk off while
standing up looking in the mirror while he's wearing the sweater.
Something like that. What I could see you doing something
like that.
Speaker 2 (08:28):
Very detailed, very detailed at him.
Speaker 4 (08:30):
Hey, Blake, let's just say I think you're a little disturbed.
Speaker 3 (08:37):
No, no, no, no, But maybe I do have an
active memory. Maybe I don't need like a visual companion
because in my mind I can summon things. Okay, so
I don't need to be seated at that family computer
to have a visual.
Speaker 4 (08:51):
Well, sure you don't. You don't have to.
Speaker 2 (08:53):
I'm not saying you have to. Of course, of course,
the like the spontaneity hits us all at various times.
Speaker 4 (09:00):
Sure, I jerked off into TJ. Maxwell's Yeah, that's when
it hit him.
Speaker 2 (09:04):
Wait, that sounds like you're live. That's a little disturbing,
but like, okay, so are you willing to accept that
you've blocked out probably years of sitting down upright at
a desktop computer.
Speaker 3 (09:19):
Yeah, I guess I was more thinking in my adult life,
like I don't do it any longer in a seated position,
like if it's gonna happen, I can't remember the last
time I j O.
Speaker 2 (09:29):
What about all those drives up to the Bay. That's
a handful of least right there.
Speaker 4 (09:34):
You're not jerking off in driving?
Speaker 2 (09:37):
No, did you throw the Tony Braxton on whoa hitting.
Speaker 4 (09:41):
The grape vine? Uh? While cranking down? No, well, grabbing
your grape vine?
Speaker 2 (09:46):
I think maybe?
Speaker 3 (09:47):
Yes, the point point gosh, you guys put me to
work today, Yes, your y grat I don't think that.
Speaker 2 (09:56):
No.
Speaker 3 (09:56):
Maybe one time I've done it on the drive from
LA to the Bay. I don't really get.
Speaker 2 (10:00):
Maybe Kyle was the guy that used to do it
a lot.
Speaker 3 (10:02):
Kyle too, I mean, my god, I think he's just
looking for in my adult life. I don't think I
ever find myself joeing in this seated position.
Speaker 2 (10:13):
It just doesn't.
Speaker 3 (10:14):
There's not really a lot of times when that happened.
Speaker 4 (10:17):
So, Blake, you're at a desk right now.
Speaker 2 (10:19):
Yes, should I go and I am Joe?
Speaker 3 (10:22):
Yes, but I won't go to completion.
Speaker 4 (10:24):
Pro There's never a time you have a toddler in
your hand.
Speaker 2 (10:27):
This is why I don't like talking about my kids. Hey, Blake,
we got to prepare him for fatherhood. Come on, be honest.
Speaker 4 (10:34):
You're in your you have like an ADU right, So
it's like as a mother in law.
Speaker 3 (10:41):
Suites that you're in completely detached. I completely detached. I
could do whatever I want A do you for a
little JOI.
Speaker 4 (10:48):
So you're kind of tucked away. It's up high where
you're at. I've been. It's like a lost so no
one's breaking in tucked sure's there's not a time where
you just after the pod or whenever you haven't met
you're like, you know what I want to I'm gonna
give myself a sweet tree before going and playing.
Speaker 2 (11:06):
With my child and seeing what's for dinner.
Speaker 4 (11:09):
Yeah, before you start to smell the hamburger helper and
uh and moseyon back inside the house stovetops for dinner.
Speaker 3 (11:18):
No, honestly, honestly, that moment has not come for me.
Speaker 2 (11:23):
Hey, yes, points Uh.
Speaker 4 (11:25):
Well, dude, so that kind of leads me to believe
that maybe you don't jerk off, uh that often at all?
Speaker 3 (11:33):
What is I guess what is often?
Speaker 4 (11:36):
For?
Speaker 3 (11:37):
If you guys want to share with what what is often?
What do you mean, like, how often are you guys
jerking off?
Speaker 2 (11:43):
I think daily is a lot.
Speaker 4 (11:44):
I think daily is a lot.
Speaker 2 (11:45):
I think three times a week.
Speaker 3 (11:48):
Daily's a lot for a for someone in a relationship.
Speaker 4 (11:51):
Daily's a lot for people that are our age, that
are in a long term, committed relationship. I think daily
would be. It's just so that's a lot of doing, right.
Speaker 2 (11:59):
I think three times a week you're putting in work. Yeah, okay,
you know you're you're putting up numbers.
Speaker 4 (12:04):
You're I'd say a couple times a week. I'd say
at least once, always, once, most twice.
Speaker 3 (12:11):
Oh yeah, there's no way I'm not There's no way
I'm not doing it.
Speaker 2 (12:14):
If the clock is about to strike midnight on a Sunday,
I get it in. I excuse myself from wherever I am,
and I get it in.
Speaker 3 (12:20):
I say, I'm going to the adu.
Speaker 4 (12:24):
I spread to the nearest adua.
Speaker 3 (12:28):
Yeah, well, I wonder that's really interesting because as your
life goes on, supposedly your masturbation times are supposed to decrease.
Speaker 2 (12:39):
I think that's what we were told, and I don't
know if it's true.
Speaker 3 (12:42):
Yeah, you jerk off the most at the very beginning
in retirement.
Speaker 2 (12:46):
It's going to be crazy. Yeah. Then it ramps back
up towards the end for sure.
Speaker 4 (12:51):
Uh, because you're just killing time.
Speaker 3 (12:53):
Yeah, waiting to die.
Speaker 2 (12:54):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (12:54):
So what are your numbers like here, Blake, because I
feel like my numbers are it's that.
Speaker 2 (12:58):
Three times a week, two times a week.
Speaker 4 (13:00):
But then if I'm hungover, I'll jerk off five times
that day.
Speaker 3 (13:04):
Dude, Adam, it's really weird you mentioned that. For some reason,
when I'm hungover, I always feel the need to seed.
Speaker 2 (13:12):
Yeah, you got to get the poison out points.
Speaker 3 (13:14):
Yeah, what is that? What is that?
Speaker 2 (13:16):
Science? Hit the button? You guys are putting me to work.
Speaker 4 (13:20):
I mentioned this to Chloe because she's like, what is
your deal? Why are you so horny? When you're hungover.
Speaker 2 (13:26):
It's can I come in?
Speaker 3 (13:27):
No? Yes, Adam.
Speaker 4 (13:29):
I love that you're saying, why are you so horny
when you're hungover?
Speaker 3 (13:32):
Yeah? What is that?
Speaker 4 (13:33):
Because obviously she's not. She's like, if we, you know,
we drink together, we you know. She's like, I don't
why why are you touching me? Why are you grinding
up on me? And I'm like, well, now I have
to jerk off five times. If you don't, don't have
to texted me five times? Then I have to drink
off five times.
Speaker 2 (13:49):
You know where I'm going to be. And I know
I like that you. I like that you say it
in a normal tone when in reality, I know you
scream it. That seems I know that it's that Sandy.
I'm standing standing up side of the bed, t shirt on,
no pants, fully and gorged, shouting, now I'm gonna jerk
(14:09):
off five times.
Speaker 4 (14:10):
I guess I had to jerk off five times.
Speaker 3 (14:13):
I think maybe what I have calculated in my mind
is that like I feel, I feel so bad that
I want to feel I want to feel good.
Speaker 4 (14:21):
That's right, that's exactly yeah.
Speaker 2 (14:24):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (14:25):
But also I'm hoping that somehow the hangover comes out
through my penis and it's gone for the rest of
the time.
Speaker 4 (14:32):
That's also what I'm Yeah, I think that's what everybody's saying.
Speaker 2 (14:35):
Interesting.
Speaker 4 (14:36):
But but but hang on, so you don't sit down?
Where do you jerk off the roof?
Speaker 2 (14:41):
He's a true work aholic.
Speaker 3 (14:44):
Yeah, dude, I go to Van Eys and I go
to the workhol house, I go to Hamlin and I
really I really put in work. No, I feel like
if I'm ever doing it, it's either laying down or
standing up, but never just seated standing.
Speaker 2 (14:58):
Okay, well this is a shower since you're okay.
Speaker 4 (15:02):
Yeah, no, no, no, he hesitated, Uh standing up? Yeah?
Speaker 2 (15:08):
Are we in socks? This is dangerous.
Speaker 4 (15:10):
First of all, the shower. The shower sucks. The shower sucks.
You're not into it, No, of course, ka sucks. Uh
we're And and the way you hesitated when he said
this is obviously a shower situation, you were like, Uh,
that leads me to like you're just in a closet
somewhere in your home standing.
Speaker 2 (15:32):
Yeah. This is You're carrying so much shame and you
don't have to.
Speaker 4 (15:35):
You don't have to let it out on the pot,
let it out.
Speaker 3 (15:39):
I don't I feel like these are the times that
I wish Kyle was here, because he would say some
ship where he actually does something way up, more fucked up,
and I could allow you guys to go bury him.
But right now I feel like you guys are kind
of piling on me.
Speaker 4 (15:53):
I'm not piling I'm actually trying to get to the
bottom of this because you're the one.
Speaker 3 (15:57):
Who and I'm not sure I want it to get
to the bottom of I don't know if I actually
want to talk about this.
Speaker 2 (16:03):
Oh yeah, that's fine, that's fine. We can just you
know what, I will say, Kyle for sure has beat
off outside more than all of us combined. That's what
I think he's like, not in a good way.
Speaker 4 (16:16):
He'll go take a jerk off walk.
Speaker 3 (16:18):
Yeah, yeah, yes, he will take his shoes and socks off,
bury them in his garden, and then beat off on
his cucumbers for sure.
Speaker 4 (16:26):
No, and then and then use his uh dick shovel
to dig them back up. And that's how exactly.
Speaker 2 (16:33):
That's how he plants his seat. He fucks the ground.
Speaker 4 (16:35):
Yeah, he goes, uh, I'm I'm hunting for some earthworms, honey,
and then he puts his worm in the earth man.
Speaker 3 (16:43):
I've seen so many worm I'm gonna start doing that
a lot.
Speaker 4 (16:46):
By the way, you're catchphrase, you're suddenly just Wendy Williams.
Speaker 3 (16:59):
When Williams is probably the best show of all time.
She is an entertainer, she's the best.
Speaker 2 (17:06):
Let me use my new cast raise.
Speaker 3 (17:09):
I don't find her very fascinating.
Speaker 2 (17:11):
She's so cool. I don't disagree she's fascinating.
Speaker 4 (17:14):
Well, I want the world to know that Blake is
choosing not to talk about Yeah, we'll move how he
stands up and jerks off, and it's not the shower,
And that's a secret that he's that he's willing to
let be a secret instead of just.
Speaker 2 (17:31):
Are you on like a indoor board? Is this like
are you building skill sets?
Speaker 3 (17:36):
No?
Speaker 4 (17:37):
You know it's a secret. It's his secret. So now
we know that Blake has a secret out there.
Speaker 2 (17:42):
I just want to say that if you're doing this
in stocking feet, if you have socks on, it's slippery,
it's dangerous. And if that's how you die, that one's
for me.
Speaker 3 (17:52):
And when I start my Patreon it will be revealed
and I will I will take the TII citizens that
I really want to know and take them over to
my Patreon and it will be you have.
Speaker 2 (18:04):
To say t I nation citizens. Otherwise I don't know
if it works at all. I think it works for
every citizens. Blah blah blah nation. We'll work on it,
all right. What do you guys got to bring to
the table.
Speaker 4 (18:16):
Where I mean, I'm a pretty open book. I mentioned
that I jerk off. I gave times, I gave locations.
I you know, I was pretty open. You you're the
one with these deep dark secrets about how you jerk off.
Speaker 2 (18:30):
It's a revelation though.
Speaker 4 (18:31):
It really is the fact that you've that you only
stand and you never sit.
Speaker 2 (18:35):
The fact that Adam stands to ship and you stand
to jack off. I'm like, what do I stand to do?
If that's the three point stancer?
Speaker 4 (18:44):
Yeah, you don't stand for anything.
Speaker 2 (18:46):
That's true, damn it. I don't stand for anything spineless.
Speaker 3 (18:49):
Stand for the damn flag. I'll tell you what I
stand for, the damn flag. That's for damn sure?
Speaker 2 (18:54):
Is that what it is? Is there an American flag
in the room? Yeah? Absolutely, you take half.
Speaker 3 (19:00):
I take my hat off, I put it over my heart.
I stand and I start to freaking. Now that's disturbed.
Speaker 2 (19:08):
Let's see that Purple Mountain majesty. Absolutely, baby, what else?
Speaker 4 (19:26):
I mean, it'll be a few weeks old now, but
we're we're trying to stockpile some episodes up because I'm
gonna have a baby and then I'm gonna be out
of commission for a few weeks, and then Kyle who
no longer is part of the podcast. It can't just
be two guys. It's gotta be at least three. You know,
I'm gonna do you know, so in a few weeks.
(19:46):
We're are going to come out a few weeks late.
But Blake is going to the super Bowl, which I'm fine, stoked.
I can't wait to hear all about it.
Speaker 3 (19:54):
But the baby, Yeah, hopefully this is me two weeks
into my celebration. But I I'm very excited to.
Speaker 2 (20:01):
Go me two weeks good way to put it.
Speaker 3 (20:03):
Yeah, it's it's the first super Bowl. This is what's crazy.
It's in Las Vegas. Yeah, I know, that's a weird
place to have a damn super Bowl. It's gonna be right.
Speaker 4 (20:14):
Sounds fucking awesome.
Speaker 2 (20:15):
It does sound awesome.
Speaker 3 (20:16):
Yeah, I mean it is going to be very what
you're talking about. But it's just like it's almost too awesome.
That's what I'm worried about, is like, what the freaking
hell it is?
Speaker 2 (20:25):
I know what you're saying. It's like the it's like
the city's almost kind of like if you end up
somehow not going to the super Bowl for a whole
other reason, you might be fine, Like there's other shit
going down.
Speaker 4 (20:37):
Yeah, I feel like it's the only city that can
actually handle the super Bowl, like actually handle it because
there's so much going on there and there's so much
indoor space. You can actually once the once the game
is over, all of those people can go to thirty
different casinos and it won't feel that overwhelming. Yeah, when
(20:59):
like no other city has that. And like I went
to the super Bowl a few years ago Tampa Bay
first the Chiefs and it was in Tampa Bay and
there's like one stretch where people party in Tampa Bay
and it was fucking bedlam, dude, it was. It was scary.
(21:19):
There was multiple murders on that street that night.
Speaker 2 (21:22):
That's just Tampa, baby.
Speaker 4 (21:25):
It was like people got killed. There was like shootouts
and ship it was wild.
Speaker 3 (21:29):
But I think Tampa is like, yeah, Tampa's a wild place.
Speaker 4 (21:33):
Well sure, but I'm just saying like there was like
one main street, which is a lot of cities had
that where it's like you know, in Austin it's like
sixth Street. It's like a lot of places just have
the one main drag and that's where everybody goes. But Vegas,
I mean, the main drag is the Strip, but there's
like forty casinos that people can get lost in. I think.
I think it's a great point.
Speaker 2 (21:52):
We went when it was in New York that seemed
to be fine, and when I went when it was
in La I mean, of course that's super duper local
for a lot of people. The thing I'm noticing is
that it seems like it's become and maybe it's always
been this and I just haven't picked up on it,
but in this era we're in of like Grant for
the Gram, it seems like it's like, are you going
(22:12):
to the Super Bowl? As if like it's it's more
than just the game. If you don't give a fuck
about Super Bowl, there's at least thirty parties to go
to afterwards.
Speaker 3 (22:23):
Yeah, That's the thing that I've noticed that's weirder in
any other way, is like I think the Super Bowl
started on Monday for Las Vegas, Like, there's been parties
every day this week and it's only leading up to
Sunday and then Sunday will will Sunday will be the
grand celebration and depression.
Speaker 2 (22:47):
Yeah, but I feel like people might even be fucking
out of commission. I bet you that five percent of
the people who are supposed to go to the Super
Bowl for one reason or another aren't even gonna fucking go.
Speaker 3 (22:57):
Could you imagine if you fucking got the like six
thousand dollars ticket and you're just arrested.
Speaker 4 (23:03):
Yeah, they're just handcuffed to a bed in the at
the Bunny Ranch and.
Speaker 2 (23:06):
They're like, miss dude, I promise you. There's just a
lot of shit going on leading up to it. You
might be too hungover or whatever, like hot at the
table or like whatever, you're just not even gonna go.
Just not going.
Speaker 3 (23:18):
You're like, ah, wait, oh, ship the games on, like.
Speaker 2 (23:22):
Like the party is gonna be going, and you're gonna
be like, remember, we're gonna break this up and go
to the fucking game. I don't know who knows five percent. Yeah.
Speaker 4 (23:28):
Yeah, Well that being said, Blake, I'm very bummed, Uh
that I'm not gonna be you know, I'm obviously I'm yeah.
Our agent gave us, We gave us tickets. That's how
Blake got hooked up. And I know that they offer
He offered tickets to Durs and myself, And I'm bummed
that I couldn't be there because I know that the
game is gonna be great. I think it's gonna be
(23:50):
a really good game. And then beyond that, the parties
and how much fun we would have after the game
would be and before the game and the daily would
be a black game. It would be so much fun.
Speaker 2 (24:00):
Just sneak out what usher usher and usher at the
halftime Usher super halftime dude, Wow, how I just know
how hungover you're gonna be.
Speaker 4 (24:10):
You're gonna jerk off, like twelve times standing out in
that hotel. We're gonna jerk might.
Speaker 2 (24:15):
Do it sitting down. I might doing sitting down.
Speaker 4 (24:19):
You're gonna be standing up in that hotel room, just
cranking down.
Speaker 2 (24:24):
I do kind of want you to try sitting down,
just to like realize, like, does it feel better. It's
still it's an option. I don't know if it's better
for you, but it's an option, and I want you
to know that it's an option.
Speaker 4 (24:34):
Well, I will say it's better than standing up like
a fucking loun What do.
Speaker 2 (24:39):
You mean standing up? We found out Adam had a
bad bag because he was sitting beating off so much
that his back and they're like, well do you stand
up or sit down?
Speaker 4 (24:49):
Hey? That's that's that's the real stiff person.
Speaker 3 (24:52):
Hey, hey, wait, hell on, we got that.
Speaker 2 (24:58):
I feel like I feel like standing up.
Speaker 3 (25:00):
It's like a It's almost like guys can stand up
to pee, like we can do it, like I don't
know if girls stand up, and I don't know if
girls stand up in j oh. I feel like it's
an honor to be a male and stand up.
Speaker 2 (25:15):
J No, well to very cool. Well no, I couldn't
have said it better myself.
Speaker 4 (25:21):
It's not an honor.
Speaker 3 (25:24):
No, No, How often do you think females jo standing
up daily?
Speaker 2 (25:30):
If I know women daily, if.
Speaker 4 (25:32):
I know chicks the way I I know that, I
do never.
Speaker 3 (25:39):
Okay, So I'm embracing it.
Speaker 4 (25:42):
So you're you're you stand up to jerk off solely because.
Speaker 2 (25:47):
Because women can't okay, all right, it seems like you're
rubbing it in their faces.
Speaker 4 (25:52):
I stand up to Jay and that's one thing I
don't want you to do is rub your j O
in their faces.
Speaker 2 (25:59):
Yeah. Well too late, too late, boys, too late. So Blazer,
do you know where these seats are? Are you in
a box? Are you down out there?
Speaker 4 (26:14):
You're in a box? I know my poys up in
a box.
Speaker 3 (26:16):
Yeah, supposedly, I'm in the box of maybe the Jacksonville
Jaguar owner. Like every owner gets a box. And I
think I'm I think I'm linking up with the Jags, dude,
which I dig because you guys know I Jag stand
uniforms are off that jack stand and their uniforms are
pretty sick. So it's a Bay Area to Jacksonville connection
(26:39):
in the box?
Speaker 4 (26:40):
So are you? I mean, are you? Do you? Are
you gonna have to like beef up on your Jacksonville
Jaguar knowledge because you're gonna be the owner. So you
feel like maybe you should have like, yes.
Speaker 2 (26:50):
Who was their quarterback?
Speaker 3 (26:52):
Trevor Lawrence?
Speaker 2 (26:53):
Oh yeah, I think Trevor Lawrence has the largest face
I've ever seen in my life.
Speaker 3 (26:58):
It's yep, it's so big, not in a bad way.
Speaker 2 (27:01):
It's not a bad looking face. I'm just like it.
That's a lot. He has a lot of face, it's long,
it's why.
Speaker 3 (27:07):
Yeah, it looks like the girl who's the witch in
on the Nightmare before Christmas.
Speaker 2 (27:13):
But that is not what I'm saying. I'm just saying no.
Speaker 3 (27:15):
But it's not bad. It's not but not in a
bad way.
Speaker 4 (27:17):
I love that character, real sexy witch.
Speaker 2 (27:20):
Cool.
Speaker 3 (27:20):
Yeah, it's cool, and he looks great and he has
great hair and he's the man.
Speaker 2 (27:25):
Other than that, kind of like the mast from Saw
in a good way, in a really good way, a
way in a really good way.
Speaker 4 (27:35):
Yeah, it looks like, well, I wonder if he's going
to be I wonder if you are a football player.
Speaker 2 (27:40):
Are you you go? I'm not well.
Speaker 4 (27:44):
I mean, do you go to the super Bowl or
or do you go? I don't give a fuck. I'm
not there, so I actively don't care.
Speaker 2 (27:52):
You just saw football players in New York. We went.
I remember seeing Gronk and Gronk didn't play right.
Speaker 4 (27:59):
Yeah, but Gronk there to make money. He was like
doing endorsement deals. Shit.
Speaker 2 (28:03):
But I think they go to party.
Speaker 3 (28:04):
Maybe this goes back to being in Las Vegas. You go,
it's Las Vegas. Everyone goes, everyone goes. It's like NBA
All Star Weekend, it's green light.
Speaker 2 (28:13):
We go even though we're ballers, we go, right, we go, man,
let's go.
Speaker 4 (28:19):
I think All Star Weekend is actually in Vegas this
year for NBA. I believe let's go.
Speaker 3 (28:27):
Vegas is really uh really starting to stake acclaim, reclaim,
reclaim its identity.
Speaker 4 (28:35):
Wait, Vegas is really starting to now steak acclaim.
Speaker 3 (28:40):
I'm saying, it's saying like we are the hub, like
we are.
Speaker 4 (28:43):
The fun it's Las Vegas. I feel like it's been
the hub.
Speaker 2 (28:46):
It's been the hub, like the convention Hub.
Speaker 3 (28:50):
Hear me out. They got a football team, they're getting
a baseball team, they have a hockey, they're gonna they're
going to get an NBA team. They're saying like, come here,
now that gamble is legal. They're like, just yeah, let's
fucking kick it here.
Speaker 4 (29:04):
Yeah it is. It is the best. I like, I
haven't been in so damn long. I went for a
Green Day concert not too long ago, but then before that,
it was like five plus years that I that.
Speaker 3 (29:16):
I yeah, I'll be honest, I don't. I don't love Vegas.
Like I'm not a Vegas guy. I think it's healthy
to not say like give yourself over to Vegas, because
if you do, it can be dangerous.
Speaker 4 (29:28):
Sure, but I'm saying it's perfect for what it is.
It's the best I think for what because none of
us are like real club guys. And I think that's
why we didn't like Vegas when we were younger. But
now we're older, dude, So now we could go to
like be a little older and like go to a
dope dinner, get drunk, do some gambling, maybe go to
like one of those like like really cool lounges that aren't.
Speaker 3 (29:53):
Like one of those what is it call where like that,
like I don't know, like they're clothes off they dance.
There's people that are like not wearing all the clothes
they should.
Speaker 2 (30:07):
It's like a bar.
Speaker 4 (30:09):
And then why and then that's that's where you don't
sit down every Yeah.
Speaker 3 (30:13):
Blake, Blake's standing up in the corner like doing whatever
he's doing.
Speaker 4 (30:18):
Is always standing Yeah, yeah, I guess that's I I
noticed that about you when whenever we've been doing in
a strip club together, you're always standing up. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (30:28):
Huh, my hands in my pocket. Just with your friend,
I want to give him a lap dance. Can't no
lap no lap to dance. Sorry, move on.
Speaker 3 (30:35):
Why's he got to both his hands in his pocket? No,
he doesn't sit down. You can jump on his back,
He'll piggyback.
Speaker 2 (30:41):
You move on, Serenity.
Speaker 4 (30:43):
Get on those like cool lounges that aren't a club.
It's more of like you have like a dope dinner
and then it's like a cool, uh upscale bar. I
suppose yeah, yeah, you know.
Speaker 2 (30:54):
Yeah, I think Vegas is also like diversified. They know
that they want to have something for everybody.
Speaker 4 (30:59):
Yeah, you could really get in the mixed, dude, to
do whatever you want to do.
Speaker 2 (31:03):
That's what I meant to say. You can get in
the mixed. You can get in the mix.
Speaker 3 (31:06):
No, I think there's a little something for everybody in Vegas,
even football. Yeah. I just know that you can also
get into a lot of weird shit in Vegas. What
happens there stays there.
Speaker 2 (31:17):
You can get into weird shipping. Yeah, I guess you can. Yeah,
I guess so fucking sure.
Speaker 3 (31:23):
And by weird I mean lose a lot of money.
I'm just not like, I don't like to gamble.
Speaker 2 (31:29):
Is that what you meant by weird? I don't think
you know how the joke form works.
Speaker 4 (31:32):
You don't like to gamble, not even not even like
a little bit like like what we did when we
were in gamp in Philly and we're at the parks, Parks.
Speaker 2 (31:42):
Calino, Ben's Salem.
Speaker 4 (31:45):
We're in beautiful Ben Salem.
Speaker 5 (31:47):
Uh.
Speaker 4 (31:48):
You don't even like to gamble, which is a few
hundred bucks play some blackjack? Is that kind of thing?
Speaker 2 (31:53):
Not really?
Speaker 4 (31:54):
I like it. I also like to throw some craps around,
throw some dice.
Speaker 3 (31:58):
But you go in thinking you're gonna win. I go
in knowing I'm gonna lose, and then we all end
up losing.
Speaker 2 (32:04):
I go in knowing I'm gonna lose, and I'm just like,
how long can I fucking string this along? Me too?
Speaker 3 (32:09):
But what's so fun about going in like, yo, I'm
about to lose fucking all the money I just took
out of this ato because the drinks are free.
Speaker 4 (32:16):
Yeah, the drinks are free, and you're doing your shouting and.
Speaker 3 (32:18):
No, they're not free. They cost as much money as
you just took out of it. They're actually more expensive
than normal just because you get to playing.
Speaker 2 (32:25):
That's that's not how reality works. They're not more expensive
than normal.
Speaker 3 (32:29):
You are the target audience for a casino because you're like, oh,
I'm getting free beers, but really you're dropping fucking five six,
seven hundred dollars out of blackjack table.
Speaker 2 (32:39):
But also I couldn't be winning or I'm losing. So
like if I'm winning, great, but I'm also losing and
paying to be playing. Yeah, like the entertainment. I pay
for the entertainment of playing, and then the drinks are free.
Speaker 3 (32:51):
I understand the contents.
Speaker 2 (32:55):
It's like, hey, you know, it's like how you know,
weird things having in Vegas.
Speaker 3 (32:58):
I understand playing blackjack isn't that fun. I'd rather play
fucking Mario Brothers. That's a little more stimulating than playing blackjacks.
Speaker 2 (33:07):
If they do, I would love to go to a
casino where I can play Mario for a thousand bucks.
Speaker 3 (33:14):
And I bet I would.
Speaker 2 (33:15):
I bet I would. You can play the mlooth Brothers.
Speaker 4 (33:18):
I don't think that they have Mario, but they actually
do have video games that you can gamble on in Vegas.
Where is it they have like the video game lounges.
They're they're all over I think all the main casinos.
Speaker 2 (33:31):
I know he is listening.
Speaker 3 (33:32):
Well, I don't if it's like modern warfare. I don't
know if I can hang, but if they have like contra,
I think I could. I think I could make some
money like sign me Up or bubble Bobble or balloon fight.
I'm really good at those times.
Speaker 4 (33:44):
Well, I don't know, maybe if they have balloon fight,
your radar at them. I don't think they have contra
or balloon fight, but yeah, I'm.
Speaker 2 (33:54):
Sure not sure about balloon fight.
Speaker 3 (33:57):
I don't know.
Speaker 4 (34:06):
What I want to do in Vegas is I want
to go. I've never gone and just sat there and
like they're in March and chircked off. And I've never
gone and just watched like March Madness and gone like
during March Madness.
Speaker 2 (34:21):
And just watching games at one of those giant bars. Yeah.
Speaker 4 (34:23):
Yeah, one of those sports books and you just go
with your buddies and put money onto all the games.
So it's like, you know, it's extra exciting, and then
just sit there and get drunk and sit there all
day long.
Speaker 2 (34:33):
Isn't Isn't it? Isn't there a place called sports book?
I think my homie is a bartender there, the guy
I went to high school with.
Speaker 4 (34:39):
Oh, every casino has this sports book that's what it's called.
Speaker 2 (34:44):
I think there's a place called sports Book where like
it's a rooftop outdoor bar with a giant fucking TV.
Speaker 4 (34:50):
My don't mind if I do.
Speaker 3 (34:52):
If that's the one, like with the pool, I feel
like they like, yeah, they it's like off.
Speaker 2 (34:55):
The strip, it's a little down the road. Anyway, put
my feelers out, check it out. I'll put you in touch.
Speaker 4 (35:01):
Well, I'm excited for you, Blake.
Speaker 2 (35:02):
I hope as we're speaking, my team won. I hope
they have contrast.
Speaker 4 (35:06):
I personally hope your team doesn't win, doesn't win.
Speaker 3 (35:10):
But yeah, why is that?
Speaker 4 (35:11):
Well, my family were Midwestern and they all are huge
Kansas City fans. So you know, you.
Speaker 3 (35:17):
Guys already won a bunch, man, just give me this one.
Speaker 4 (35:20):
So is the forty nine ers. Dude, they've also won
a fucking time.
Speaker 3 (35:23):
It was so long ago I was just a baby.
Speaker 2 (35:25):
Weren't they just there and lost it?
Speaker 4 (35:27):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (35:27):
Yeah, they've lost very recently several times. Dude, Come on,
so that's what they do. Let us get over to
the hump.
Speaker 4 (35:33):
Yeah yeah, yeah, I'm with you. I understand, And that's
why I'm like, if the Chiefs lose, sick my boy
Blake is having a fucking awesome time in Vegas a lot,
So I'm not that mad at it. But but I
think it's cool that they have such a dynasty as
the Kent City Chiefs. So I think it's pretty rare.
Speaker 2 (35:51):
It's special, it's it's to be respected. Yeah, I do
like watching christ and McCaffrey play.
Speaker 4 (35:57):
Yes, in those pants? Is that you're saying that dude,
as the kids say, he got a cheat code? Absolutely,
you're saying in those pants or what?
Speaker 2 (36:05):
I don't even know what that means.
Speaker 3 (36:08):
You like, just watch him play in the pant those pants,
you like football pants, those type football pants or what?
Speaker 4 (36:14):
What? What do you mean?
Speaker 2 (36:14):
Do you like football pants? I like watching him play football.
Speaker 4 (36:19):
Okay, okay, in those pants.
Speaker 2 (36:23):
Yeah he's wearing like okay, he is wearing pants, right, Okay,
So I'm sorry. I thought I wasn't sure what you're saying. Yeah,
but I do he would like seeing him play in
those I know.
Speaker 4 (36:38):
I know my boy durs When he says things like that,
I feel he's a little a little disturbed.
Speaker 2 (36:45):
You're right, because when I see Christian McCaffrey come on
screen in those pants, it's like.
Speaker 3 (36:52):
Wait, I that was not That was not an ali.
Speaker 4 (37:00):
That was a long way to go.
Speaker 2 (37:02):
But I will have my finger ready. I feel like
when you watch him, you know, here's my thing. When
I watch him play, he's so fucking fast. His legs
are willing so quickly, and he's cutting left and right.
That you go, yeah, that makes sense. But when I
watched Travis Kelcey, I don't understand how he's always in
the right place at the right time. He doesn't seem
(37:23):
like especially quick or like that he makes these crazy cuts.
He just seems like he gets to where the ball's
gonna go and he brings it down. I mean, it's
some outrageously what is the wild catches in the last game.
But I'm always like.
Speaker 3 (37:41):
Well, he's a tight end. Tight ends, that's they're not
wide receivers. They don't have like the quickness. They're just big,
like freaking hulks.
Speaker 4 (37:48):
And he's just a giant.
Speaker 2 (37:49):
But what was like Terrell Owens, he was a wide
receiver and he has any fucking fast as fuck and
cutting people and.
Speaker 3 (37:56):
Yeah, dude, wide receivers are insane. That's like Jerry right,
and so wait, sorry, what's Travis kelce d d so
when they aren't catching the ball, they're like blocking, so
they have to be like really big dudes. But when
they do catch the ball, and if they're athletic, then
all of a sudden, it's like a tank running down
the field.
Speaker 4 (38:17):
And it was my boy, Tony Gonzalez that kind of
changed the modern day tight end.
Speaker 3 (38:23):
Correct, there we go, that's Kansas City, right.
Speaker 4 (38:26):
Yeah, it was a Kansas City chief, Tony Gonzalez, who
I did that Amazon commercial with super nice guy, great
skin and he still looks like he could play football.
The guys like still just jagged, like did not let
himself go so and I was right next to him
standing the entire time. But yeah, so he kind of
(38:49):
changed what the modern day tight end is is like
a little more athletic than what they used to be,
much like the Grondkinader. And then now we got Travis Kelcey.
Speaker 3 (38:59):
Oh yeah, big gronk. Yeah, big guys.
Speaker 2 (39:02):
Gronk at least with like fake he'd like make cuts.
Speaker 4 (39:05):
They're just make you seem like he's a little more athletic.
Speaker 2 (39:08):
I think, so he seemed like he was. I mean,
he's so big that like he's so big you don't
realize how fast he is. Yeah, you just want to
see him standing there in his pants.
Speaker 3 (39:18):
I'd rather see him sitting down, Honestly, I'd love to
see what down. I feel like he could do a
lot sitting down, just like just like my homies.
Speaker 4 (39:29):
So what why why can't you? I've got family coming
in town and Chloe's giving birth next week. That's why
I'm not going to the super Bowl, durs. You just
have like family stuff.
Speaker 2 (39:37):
Emma's going skiing. I'm with the kids all weekend. There
we go. Do you think bad point?
Speaker 4 (39:42):
Do you think you get tad points by taking you
take them to Vegas?
Speaker 2 (39:47):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (39:48):
You you know, you stay at a kid friendly hotel,
the Circus Circus.
Speaker 2 (39:53):
Yeah, I feel like he could be fun.
Speaker 3 (39:56):
You pay the waiter to watch them in the pool,
give them a bucket of quarters. Yeah yeah, you give
them a bucket of quarters and say hit hit the arcade.
Speaker 4 (40:05):
Which, by the way, this is what my parents used
to do.
Speaker 3 (40:07):
Like, yeah, wait, the first casino you ever went to
was it with your parents?
Speaker 4 (40:12):
Right? Yes? And it was the uh, what's the like
Aladdin's Castle one, the one that is like in Vegas.
Speaker 3 (40:18):
In Vegas? You went to Vegas? That was your first Uh,
casino experience.
Speaker 4 (40:23):
Yeah, I think so. Like I was like fourteen or thirteen,
however old that's damn and uh we stayed at what's
the one that that like the dragon comes out and
breeze fire Excaloxcalibur. We stayed there by the way.
Speaker 3 (40:36):
Yeah, fucking place rocks.
Speaker 4 (40:38):
It doesn't, dude, it doesn't.
Speaker 2 (40:40):
It's reeks hilarious.
Speaker 4 (40:41):
It reeks a mold.
Speaker 2 (40:42):
It's pretty bad.
Speaker 3 (40:43):
Yeah, is it still there? I love that it's so bad.
That's what I love about.
Speaker 4 (40:47):
Yeah, it's so bad.
Speaker 2 (40:48):
They're going to tear it down soon, right.
Speaker 3 (40:50):
They have to if it's not already gone.
Speaker 4 (40:51):
And then and then they like were like, hey, we'll
take you to Circus Circus. That'll be fun. And then
we go to Circus Circus and then they I mean,
they're not like degenerate gamblers, but they're in Vegas, so
they're gonna want to like gamble a little bit. And
then they just gave us quarters and we just sat
at the shitty arcade at Circus Circus and played play
video games.
Speaker 3 (41:11):
Time Crisis, Like, did your parents take you to Vegas?
Speaker 2 (41:14):
This is not on my childhood.
Speaker 3 (41:16):
No, I didn't go to Vegas.
Speaker 4 (41:18):
My parents were cheap, and they got like a it
was like a discounted tickets and hotel room stay because
you can. They do give great discounts. That'd being said,
it's don't take your children to Vegas unless especially if
your kid is like thirteen fourteen. I was so horny.
Speaker 2 (41:34):
Yeah, I do like the idea of my me like
sending my kids to like the slot machine and then
just they're at tal just fucking it's holding it down
in a cabana. Yeah, they probably could, dude, They're so jacked,
they'd probably do well.
Speaker 4 (41:49):
They're ripped, they're shredded, shredded.
Speaker 3 (41:51):
The first time I ever went to Vegas was I
think it was my eighteenth birthday and my dad and
my stepmom they took me to see the Blue Man
Group and that shit was off the fucking hook.
Speaker 4 (42:03):
Dude, we went to Vegas once with you and your dad?
Was that your twenty first birthday?
Speaker 3 (42:09):
That was my twenty first and the wheels really came off.
That shit was fun too, and then.
Speaker 4 (42:14):
We I remember, for whatever reasons I look back, it
must have been kind of cold because I was like
wearing a cardigan, and I, by the way, hate cardigans.
Speaker 2 (42:24):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (42:25):
Never wore them, and for whatever reason.
Speaker 2 (42:27):
It was the it was the era.
Speaker 4 (42:28):
This this Vega, this Vegas trip. I'm wearing a goddamn cardigan.
Speaker 3 (42:33):
I think I think we were all like tried to
dress as cool as we could. And you so somehow
found a cardigan somewhere and you're like, I think this
is what's trending right now.
Speaker 4 (42:45):
Yeah. I think we tried to like age up like ourselves,
to be like not just like because we looked like
children when we were twenty Oh my god. Well not
Kyle kind of always looked like a thirty eight year
old divorced dad. But yeah, but we looked like kids.
And uh, and I think that was my way of
looking a little older is a.
Speaker 2 (43:08):
It's like, yo, mister Rogers.
Speaker 4 (43:10):
If you told me Blake was wearing a fedora during
this time, I would believe.
Speaker 2 (43:14):
That I wasn't.
Speaker 3 (43:15):
But I was definitely wearing like a black T shirt
that had like fake jewelry like on it.
Speaker 2 (43:21):
Out like the necklace print or whatever.
Speaker 3 (43:24):
Yes, yes, I'll post it.
Speaker 2 (43:26):
That's cool.
Speaker 3 (43:27):
I have a lot of photos. It's my twenty first birthday,
so I have those photos. But I went there before that.
I went for my eighteenth birthday. I saw Blue Man
Group and I think I saw David Copperfield too, which
was fucking off the chains.
Speaker 4 (43:41):
See that's what I'm saying. By the way, I want
to do what and what movie was it that? Was
it super bad? Not super bad? Was it knocked up?
Speaker 2 (43:50):
This is?
Speaker 4 (43:51):
This is where they go and was it.
Speaker 2 (43:52):
This supporting and they go and do uh maybe it
is knocked out.
Speaker 4 (43:54):
Yeah, they go and do mushrooms and then see circus
so late. I'm like that to me sounds like an
absolute wonderful day in Vegas.
Speaker 2 (44:04):
You can you watch the super Bowl with this new
sphere thing? I gotta go to the sphere? Can you
watch the Super Bowl? Are they gonna er?
Speaker 3 (44:10):
That would be brilliant. Of course I don't think that
is what is happening, but that would be absolutely brilliant.
But also I don't know, what would it be like
watching a football game in a like dome form Awesome?
Speaker 4 (44:22):
Well, dude, it would be. It'd be like you're at
the game.
Speaker 2 (44:24):
It would be great.
Speaker 4 (44:25):
It would be fucking phenomenal.
Speaker 3 (44:27):
Yeah, I feel like you might want to throw up too.
Speaker 2 (44:29):
Though they would sort it out.
Speaker 4 (44:30):
Well, you're not watching it like it's you're not like
hovering above. It'll be like the game is happening here
and then this.
Speaker 2 (44:37):
So it'd be all around you.
Speaker 3 (44:38):
When you watch football, it's straight ahead. It would be
three sixty.
Speaker 2 (44:42):
I guess what. I would trust the people who develop
the way you watch things to do it right. Not
year one, not year one, What do you mean they've
been people have been going that set. It's off the
fucking chain.
Speaker 3 (44:55):
It does look cool, but they're not ready to pipe
in the super Bowl. Maybe year five they'll be ready.
Speaker 2 (45:00):
Listen to me, all they have to do is just
broadcast it as a big ass TV and had the
recipe black. It can be the sky, it can be whatever.
Speaker 3 (45:07):
Well, then why would you want to be in there?
That place seems like it sucks. You're trapped in up
fucking because.
Speaker 2 (45:13):
You're with twenty thousand people watching a game, drinking and
kicking it.
Speaker 4 (45:17):
It doesn't sound bad.
Speaker 2 (45:18):
That's literally every casino like sports room like, but it's
so much bigger, dude, it's not.
Speaker 4 (45:24):
It's not. It's it's the it's the because it's the
sphere and you're with the five thousand other people. However,
many people fit in this goddamn.
Speaker 2 (45:32):
Sphere look, just because you're actually going in the game.
Fuck you you can come too. Come on, bring the boys,
let's go, dude, Yeah.
Speaker 4 (45:40):
Bring the play go.
Speaker 2 (45:42):
I wanted to take them to a monster truck rally.
But it's next weekend.
Speaker 3 (45:45):
God damn, what the hell, let's go.
Speaker 4 (45:48):
I think it was this past weekend.
Speaker 5 (45:49):
Uh.
Speaker 2 (45:50):
Down here in Anaheim, it was the past and it's
the next That's what got my I was like, oh,
it's probably a couple of weekends, and uh I was wrong.
What else? What else? What else?
Speaker 4 (46:01):
What else to talk about? That's Blake Blake to tell
us his mystery.
Speaker 3 (46:07):
Uh, no, way that. Actually I have something I'd like
to bring up. Did you know that they are discontinuing
just continuing fruit stripe gum?
Speaker 4 (46:20):
You guys? Any apologies?
Speaker 2 (46:27):
Dude?
Speaker 4 (46:27):
Didn't he take that?
Speaker 2 (46:28):
Doesn't? I think we can even skip it. Uh let's see,
I'll see around Blake, have a good.
Speaker 4 (46:33):
Time, Blake. I mean, yeah, that that gum sucks and
it probably shouldn't.
Speaker 3 (46:38):
No, no, no, no, it is what it is in terms
of flavor. But I feel like it means something to me.
Speaker 2 (46:46):
I feel like it means something. Oh, I think they're
saying it's over and they're just going to bring it
back with flavor.
Speaker 4 (46:54):
So people like Blake or like it means something to
me that gum due does.
Speaker 2 (47:00):
Like remember when like they were like we're closing, Nate.
Now it's like, isn't that ship back open? And everyone
is writing like these diatribes on Instagram about like the
first meeting I ever took about being a writer?
Speaker 4 (47:10):
Was it? Well, say classic American Los Angeles diner, right, Nate, now, yes, yes, yes,
this is a gum.
Speaker 2 (47:20):
And I would say the fruit striped gum is a
quintessential gum for children across.
Speaker 3 (47:26):
The fruit stripe gum no juicy fruit. I think it's worldwide.
You take juicy fruit over over fruit striped gum.
Speaker 4 (47:34):
Fruit stripe was the one with like little zebras on it,
and ship the zebra.
Speaker 3 (47:37):
Was cool, yes, and tattoos and tattoos like temporary tattoos.
Speaker 4 (47:42):
It doesn't mean anything to me.
Speaker 2 (47:44):
And it was bigger, you got way more pieces.
Speaker 3 (47:48):
I honestly want to say that last thing I ever
bought with my own money was a fruit stripe gum.
Speaker 4 (47:56):
If you were to tell me that their discontinuous.
Speaker 2 (47:59):
Is a fruit stripe gun gone.
Speaker 4 (48:04):
If you were to tell me that they're discontinuing like
now and later.
Speaker 2 (48:07):
I'm disturbed.
Speaker 4 (48:08):
Then I would be they would do something to me,
but fruit striped gone now and later.
Speaker 2 (48:12):
Yeah, but they wouldn't discontinue now and later.
Speaker 3 (48:14):
No, now and laters aren't aren't that good?
Speaker 4 (48:16):
I would?
Speaker 2 (48:17):
I agree? I actually hate now laters.
Speaker 3 (48:19):
Yeah, they're too hard.
Speaker 2 (48:20):
I can't. I'm like this, I'm like, this is going
to be living in my teeth. I can't get this
out because.
Speaker 4 (48:25):
You save it for later.
Speaker 2 (48:27):
Sure, sure, okay, fair enough.
Speaker 4 (48:29):
You have some now and then some of it gets
stuck in your teeth, and that's the later.
Speaker 2 (48:34):
When they're too hard. They're kind of sharp too. When
they're hard, Yeah, stiff man, And can we chop? Can
we chop that sound bite? Because I need that for
the board?
Speaker 4 (48:44):
Had hard?
Speaker 2 (48:47):
Yeah, I just like, I don't know, you need another
four inches? Remember when you would suck the jolly the
flat long jolly brancher, you could suck into a shape, dude.
And can I get that for the board?
Speaker 4 (48:59):
Everything that would slob into a shank as it can?
Speaker 2 (49:03):
Can I get that for the board? The jolly rand,
the big flat jolly rancher, you could you could just
suck it in a way, dude, dude that you could
turn into a sharp ass shank or.
Speaker 4 (49:14):
Like a candy cane when you would just deep throat
it and then slob on it until sure it would
get into a shank or like.
Speaker 3 (49:23):
Like a like a like a raw cabasa, and you
would just kind of nibble on the tip a little
bit and just sort of like tease tease the tip
of it.
Speaker 4 (49:32):
Now we were talking candy, dude, you know you got
you get all sexual with it?
Speaker 2 (49:37):
Are you trying? I don't know. I feel like you're
trying to do a joke or something. We're talking about candy.
Speaker 4 (49:40):
It's not all about bits here. Okay, you brought up
the gum?
Speaker 2 (49:45):
Can you tell us the tale of Rumpel? Still skin
right quick? You wish?
Speaker 3 (49:49):
No, no, we gotta do durseys uh kid's story Corners
huns Christian unders stories.
Speaker 2 (49:57):
Yeah, what do you got, dude? You got something?
Speaker 3 (49:59):
Man?
Speaker 2 (50:00):
Humpty dumpty? What do we got? Bro? Hit us with it?
Did he write The Little Mermaid?
Speaker 3 (50:04):
It's possible.
Speaker 2 (50:05):
I think I think you might have ye class damn class.
Speaker 4 (50:08):
I would love to hear that ship Hans Christian Anderson
is that right, it's Christian Anderson.
Speaker 2 (50:12):
He's got some bangers, dude.
Speaker 4 (50:14):
That guy knew was up.
Speaker 2 (50:15):
I got a five hundred page book of Hans Christian
Andersen stories.
Speaker 4 (50:18):
I remember when you bought that.
Speaker 2 (50:20):
Yeah, huh, I don't like it. I bought in college,
but I love you. No, Adam bought it for you.
Speaker 4 (50:27):
No, I remember you at least having that when we
were like young, and you were like, I have this
five hundred page book, and I was.
Speaker 2 (50:33):
Like, carries it around all the time.
Speaker 3 (50:35):
He's fucking weirdo, dude.
Speaker 4 (50:36):
I was like, how many pages.
Speaker 2 (50:38):
Keeps like windows propped open? It's stick enough to keep
a window open, little breeze.
Speaker 4 (50:42):
And yeah, it's your doorstop.
Speaker 3 (50:44):
Yeah, this dude would pull up the Second City with
the fucking Hans Christian Anderson book, Like have you heard
the Tale of I'm what's crazy?
Speaker 2 (50:52):
Is I read? I only read it standing up.
Speaker 4 (50:55):
All of his references are the Goldie Locks and rumpel Stilts.
Speaker 2 (51:00):
Mm hmma, I don't know.
Speaker 4 (51:05):
Guy.
Speaker 2 (51:05):
He does have hell a banger though that You're like, oh,
that's you think it was all the same guy.
Speaker 4 (51:09):
All of Jersey's improv beats where I'm gonna huff and
puff and blow over this door. We're like, uh, well
we're in a doctor's office, but all.
Speaker 2 (51:18):
Right, crossbows and mustaches is actually uh hons and Fritz
the fucking.
Speaker 3 (51:24):
The first The first season of Workaholics was too cold,
the second season was too hot, the third was just right,
and then four or five six that.
Speaker 2 (51:35):
Is due reading the list of things. Oh, the Emperor's
new clothes. We all know that bad.
Speaker 3 (51:40):
Oh, that one's actually really cool. That's where he just
has public nudity.
Speaker 4 (51:44):
Yeah, he's all button naked.
Speaker 2 (51:45):
And that's when you just turn on CNN and they're
all like, it's just the Emperor's new clothes.
Speaker 4 (51:50):
All right, that's Drake.
Speaker 2 (51:53):
Oh topical hold.
Speaker 4 (51:55):
Of any take backs, apologies and the epic slam boys.
Speaker 2 (52:00):
Oh man, I just want to take back anything I
said that made Blake feel uncomfortable about usually jacking off
standing up. I think it's cool for you, it's not
necessarily what I prefer.
Speaker 4 (52:12):
Yeah, yeah, I also was going to bring that.
Speaker 2 (52:14):
And it's not like I've never done it. I've definitely
done it. But on one hand, how many times.
Speaker 4 (52:21):
We've all done it. It's weird how Blake was so
kind of standoffish and defensive about how much he's done
it or like where he does it. Usually we're all
very open and honest and it's cool, and I'm sure
I'm the ugly definitely give flowers because we don't do that,
but I think it is. I would like to pay
(52:43):
my respects to Blake for keeping some things for himself
and have his secrets, okay.
Speaker 2 (52:48):
And just to kind of the princess and the peak. Yeah,
and just to kind.
Speaker 3 (52:52):
Of build off what you guys are talking about, like
fruit Stripe, gun Man, I'm gonna miss you man, all right.
Speaker 4 (53:00):
Yeah, we can end it there, all right, And that's
another episode
Welcome to This Is Important, a production of iHeart Radio,
the show where we talk about what's obviously both critically
crucially important today on This Is.
Speaker 2 (00:13):
Important, standing up side of the bed t shirt on
no pants, fully engorged, shouting.
Speaker 3 (00:21):
For some reason, when I'm hungover, I always feel the
need to seed.
Speaker 4 (00:26):
I jerked off into TJ Maxwe's let's go. Hey, he hey,
we pay.
Speaker 2 (00:42):
Let's go.
Speaker 1 (00:44):
Do you feel that?
Speaker 4 (00:46):
Oh shit?
Speaker 2 (00:50):
All right, that's fifteen seconds?
Speaker 3 (00:52):
Is that?
Speaker 4 (00:53):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (00:54):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (00:54):
Dude? Yeah, posa dude that gets white people going in,
like Midwestern suburban whites. Whoo the whites? He are fired up?
Speaker 2 (01:08):
Did they play that at sports stadiums and stuff?
Speaker 3 (01:12):
That feels like a sports anthem?
Speaker 2 (01:13):
Have you? But have you? It feels like it. That's
I'm saying, but have you? Do we hear this?
Speaker 4 (01:17):
I haven't heard it?
Speaker 2 (01:19):
Why don't we? That's crazy?
Speaker 4 (01:20):
If you told me that the guy from Disturbed actually
did like lock children in his basement or something. I
don't know, but there has to be a reason we
don't hear that at stadiums.
Speaker 3 (01:32):
Go ahead, Adam, I'm the lead singer. Definitely they passed away.
I think the lead singer is dead.
Speaker 4 (01:38):
Oh really what was he a good guy? Or did
he lock kids in the basement? I mean he's a
lead singer of a band called Disturbed.
Speaker 2 (01:44):
Go ahead at him. Yeah, I feel like it was
disturbed in a way.
Speaker 4 (01:47):
I feel like, you know, there's a lot of things there.
Speaker 3 (01:50):
What if he was really well adjusted, well, then.
Speaker 4 (01:52):
I feel like you we would be hearing that at
every stadium.
Speaker 2 (01:55):
Disturb was talking about like the planet, not himself.
Speaker 4 (02:00):
The lead singer of Disturbed is still live, says Todd.
Speaker 3 (02:02):
Wait then who died?
Speaker 2 (02:04):
Oh I know who died? Lincoln Park?
Speaker 3 (02:06):
Oh there it is, no, I know Lincoln Park. And
also it was called like drowning pool, right there was.
There was a band and that ship was pretty fire too.
I got to look that up. I'll play the fort
fifteen seconds of it, all.
Speaker 2 (02:20):
Right, Adam, how you doing?
Speaker 4 (02:21):
I'm checking out. He doesn't seem that disturbed. He seems
just like a guy that has in a band, which
which is a little disappointing because if you name your
band disturbed, you gotta do some disturbing shit.
Speaker 3 (02:33):
For sure.
Speaker 2 (02:34):
You want him to walk the walk.
Speaker 3 (02:35):
Yeah, yeah, you gotta walk the walk.
Speaker 4 (02:37):
But I'm also like, well, why don't we hear that
song at every stadium. Then I want when when my
LA Clippers, when Kawhi Leonard, oh my god, dunks dunks
on a fool for it to go. Yeah, oh my god.
Speaker 3 (02:52):
These are so good. You know, we don't really deep
dive sports. And also this is two weeks out, so
who knows. They might not be for plays right now.
Anybody who cares anything about basketball, this might be the
Clippers year.
Speaker 4 (03:07):
That's what they're all saying. And guess what, I don't
like it. I don't.
Speaker 3 (03:11):
I don't like with that because you you are a
you are a cursed franchise. We do know that we are.
Speaker 4 (03:17):
We we certainly aren't.
Speaker 3 (03:19):
But this feels beyond the curse.
Speaker 4 (03:21):
You know, if it feels good. But if the first
game of the playoffs, uh, the entire team's knees explode,
that would make perfect sense.
Speaker 2 (03:32):
They're like jump ball. What just happened there?
Speaker 4 (03:35):
They all all to.
Speaker 3 (03:36):
The ground, their knees exploded. There's some seaport.
Speaker 4 (03:40):
Yeah, that would that would make a lot of sense.
Speaker 2 (03:42):
What's the furthest they've gone?
Speaker 4 (03:44):
In the Western Western Conference Finals? Was the furthest they've
gone they've gone? That was just a couple of years ago, which.
Speaker 3 (03:50):
To people who don't watch sports, that's right before the finals,
which is where you win it all.
Speaker 2 (03:56):
Whould they play Phoenix? Phoenix, Phoenix?
Speaker 4 (03:59):
I think it who Phoenix?
Speaker 3 (04:02):
Yeah? I love it. Well, good luck with that or
will you? Will you go to some playoff games if
that happens?
Speaker 4 (04:08):
Yeah, I mean we're the baby by this podcast. The
baby is I think thirteen years old.
Speaker 2 (04:14):
So dude, yeah, my kid is gonna be out.
Speaker 4 (04:18):
Yeah. So I'm celebrated. Man, thirteenth, thirteenth birthday?
Speaker 2 (04:22):
What's to man?
Speaker 4 (04:24):
Just jerking off a lot? Yeah? Yeah, okay, keep catching him.
He can't. He can't stop it.
Speaker 3 (04:32):
He's hey, your boy is disturbed. He is just now
that's disturbed. My god. I keep walking.
Speaker 2 (04:38):
Into he's fucking beating off into a tube sock. Yeah.
Speaker 4 (04:42):
Every every time I every time I see him jerking
off into a Kleenex or a tube sock, I go,
what are you doing?
Speaker 2 (04:55):
I go, oh, man, that is wild.
Speaker 3 (04:58):
Dude, You're gonna have a boy boys or way way crazy.
That's gonna be fun for you.
Speaker 2 (05:04):
I don't know what are you basing that on? Black? Yeah?
Speaker 4 (05:06):
What are you in the.
Speaker 3 (05:06):
Fact that I have girls and they're very well behaved,
but boys are psychos. I'm basing on myself. I jerked
off everywhere.
Speaker 2 (05:14):
It was amazing. Yeah, that's not psycho, that's just passing
the time.
Speaker 4 (05:17):
Yeah it's yeah, it's just jerking off. And by the way,
I feel like I wouldn't even be my dad. Every
time I was in the bathroom taking a shit, it's
like it's important. Absolutely every time I was in there
going to the bathroom, he would go, uh, quit jerking it.
You're gonna go blind through the bathroom door. And what's
(05:38):
funny is probably eighty five percent of the time he.
Speaker 2 (05:42):
Was right, right, it's the only way you could climbax.
Speaker 4 (05:45):
I'm not jerking off, Like stop, I'm not, But also
I am.
Speaker 2 (05:49):
I do. Like how like you go into the bathroom
just to take a shit and he's like, don't jerk
off in there.
Speaker 4 (05:54):
You're like, I'm not.
Speaker 2 (05:55):
And then you're like, I'm thinking a bad idea. Not
a bad idea.
Speaker 3 (06:00):
Were you sitting down to ship and jerking off in
sitting position? Because that's fucking disturbed.
Speaker 4 (06:07):
Yeah, what do you mean I jerk off in sitting positions? Wait,
I still do.
Speaker 2 (06:14):
Blake can only do it bending over looking backwards into him.
Speaker 4 (06:18):
You what what do you what do you mean, Blake?
Speaker 3 (06:23):
I don't I honestly, we got a stand there. I
probably could count on my hands.
Speaker 2 (06:31):
Wait, what is the same.
Speaker 3 (06:33):
I could probably count the number of times on my
hands how many times I've I've jerked off like in
sitting position, like sitting straight up?
Speaker 4 (06:41):
What are you talking about?
Speaker 5 (06:42):
So this is we're finding What I love about the
podcast is we just find out these little bit crazy
If you ever, if you ever want to find out
the most intimate details of your best friends lives, uh,
I start a podcast and do about one hundred and
ninety episodes.
Speaker 3 (07:00):
Yeah, yeah, you start to scrape the bottom of the bar.
Speaker 4 (07:03):
Then you really start to find out. You find out
that I started stand up while wiping, and that was
I mean, my god, we got a we got a
lot of mileage out.
Speaker 2 (07:12):
Of that was early.
Speaker 4 (07:13):
That was got a whole lot of mileage out of that.
Speaker 2 (07:16):
That's one of the pillars of this podcast.
Speaker 4 (07:18):
But this, but this, it actually disturbs me.
Speaker 2 (07:21):
You seem.
Speaker 4 (07:26):
I gotta get disturbed, be ready, because.
Speaker 2 (07:32):
Never sitting down? What Yeah, by the way, the saying
is I can count on one hand, but like.
Speaker 4 (07:38):
Yeah, hand on my hand. I got on my.
Speaker 2 (07:42):
Hand and you can only count with one hand.
Speaker 3 (07:45):
If I never jo in.
Speaker 2 (07:48):
The sitting position is seated position. What did you do
before like laptops and you were in front of a
desktop computer at like your parents' house.
Speaker 4 (07:56):
Yeah, yep, correct.
Speaker 2 (07:58):
Oh, so there were years I was sitting there?
Speaker 4 (08:00):
Am I bad?
Speaker 3 (08:01):
No?
Speaker 4 (08:02):
H corrects?
Speaker 2 (08:04):
No, I just you were standing, was standing so you
could like dart out the.
Speaker 4 (08:09):
I could see Blake being one of those weirdos who
didn't look at porn and would just like smell, like
he stole a girl's a girl's sweater and he would
just smell the sweater and then just jerk off while
standing up looking in the mirror while he's wearing the sweater.
Something like that. What I could see you doing something
like that.
Speaker 2 (08:28):
Very detailed, very detailed at him.
Speaker 4 (08:30):
Hey, Blake, let's just say I think you're a little disturbed.
Speaker 3 (08:37):
No, no, no, no, But maybe I do have an
active memory. Maybe I don't need like a visual companion
because in my mind I can summon things. Okay, so
I don't need to be seated at that family computer
to have a visual.
Speaker 4 (08:51):
Well, sure you don't. You don't have to.
Speaker 2 (08:53):
I'm not saying you have to. Of course, of course,
the like the spontaneity hits us all at various times.
Speaker 4 (09:00):
Sure, I jerked off into TJ. Maxwell's Yeah, that's when
it hit him.
Speaker 2 (09:04):
Wait, that sounds like you're live. That's a little disturbing,
but like, okay, so are you willing to accept that
you've blocked out probably years of sitting down upright at
a desktop computer.
Speaker 3 (09:19):
Yeah, I guess I was more thinking in my adult life,
like I don't do it any longer in a seated position,
like if it's gonna happen, I can't remember the last
time I j O.
Speaker 2 (09:29):
What about all those drives up to the Bay. That's
a handful of least right there.
Speaker 4 (09:34):
You're not jerking off in driving?
Speaker 2 (09:37):
No, did you throw the Tony Braxton on whoa hitting.
Speaker 4 (09:41):
The grape vine? Uh? While cranking down? No, well, grabbing
your grape vine?
Speaker 2 (09:46):
I think maybe?
Speaker 3 (09:47):
Yes, the point point gosh, you guys put me to
work today, Yes, your y grat I don't think that.
Speaker 2 (09:56):
No.
Speaker 3 (09:56):
Maybe one time I've done it on the drive from
LA to the Bay. I don't really get.
Speaker 2 (10:00):
Maybe Kyle was the guy that used to do it
a lot.
Speaker 3 (10:02):
Kyle too, I mean, my god, I think he's just
looking for in my adult life. I don't think I
ever find myself joeing in this seated position.
Speaker 2 (10:13):
It just doesn't.
Speaker 3 (10:14):
There's not really a lot of times when that happened.
Speaker 4 (10:17):
So, Blake, you're at a desk right now.
Speaker 2 (10:19):
Yes, should I go and I am Joe?
Speaker 3 (10:22):
Yes, but I won't go to completion.
Speaker 4 (10:24):
Pro There's never a time you have a toddler in
your hand.
Speaker 2 (10:27):
This is why I don't like talking about my kids. Hey, Blake,
we got to prepare him for fatherhood. Come on, be honest.
Speaker 4 (10:34):
You're in your you have like an ADU right, So
it's like as a mother in law.
Speaker 3 (10:41):
Suites that you're in completely detached. I completely detached. I
could do whatever I want A do you for a
little JOI.
Speaker 4 (10:48):
So you're kind of tucked away. It's up high where
you're at. I've been. It's like a lost so no
one's breaking in tucked sure's there's not a time where
you just after the pod or whenever you haven't met
you're like, you know what I want to I'm gonna
give myself a sweet tree before going and playing.
Speaker 2 (11:06):
With my child and seeing what's for dinner.
Speaker 4 (11:09):
Yeah, before you start to smell the hamburger helper and
uh and moseyon back inside the house stovetops for dinner.
Speaker 3 (11:18):
No, honestly, honestly, that moment has not come for me.
Speaker 2 (11:23):
Hey, yes, points Uh.
Speaker 4 (11:25):
Well, dude, so that kind of leads me to believe
that maybe you don't jerk off, uh that often at all?
Speaker 3 (11:33):
What is I guess what is often?
Speaker 4 (11:36):
For?
Speaker 3 (11:37):
If you guys want to share with what what is often?
What do you mean, like, how often are you guys
jerking off?
Speaker 2 (11:43):
I think daily is a lot.
Speaker 4 (11:44):
I think daily is a lot.
Speaker 2 (11:45):
I think three times a week.
Speaker 3 (11:48):
Daily's a lot for a for someone in a relationship.
Speaker 4 (11:51):
Daily's a lot for people that are our age, that
are in a long term, committed relationship. I think daily
would be. It's just so that's a lot of doing, right.
Speaker 2 (11:59):
I think three times a week you're putting in work. Yeah, okay,
you know you're you're putting up numbers.
Speaker 4 (12:04):
You're I'd say a couple times a week. I'd say
at least once, always, once, most twice.
Speaker 3 (12:11):
Oh yeah, there's no way I'm not There's no way
I'm not doing it.
Speaker 2 (12:14):
If the clock is about to strike midnight on a Sunday,
I get it in. I excuse myself from wherever I am,
and I get it in.
Speaker 3 (12:20):
I say, I'm going to the adu.
Speaker 4 (12:24):
I spread to the nearest adua.
Speaker 3 (12:28):
Yeah, well, I wonder that's really interesting because as your
life goes on, supposedly your masturbation times are supposed to decrease.
Speaker 2 (12:39):
I think that's what we were told, and I don't
know if it's true.
Speaker 3 (12:42):
Yeah, you jerk off the most at the very beginning
in retirement.
Speaker 2 (12:46):
It's going to be crazy. Yeah. Then it ramps back
up towards the end for sure.
Speaker 4 (12:51):
Uh, because you're just killing time.
Speaker 3 (12:53):
Yeah, waiting to die.
Speaker 2 (12:54):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (12:54):
So what are your numbers like here, Blake, because I
feel like my numbers are it's that.
Speaker 2 (12:58):
Three times a week, two times a week.
Speaker 4 (13:00):
But then if I'm hungover, I'll jerk off five times
that day.
Speaker 3 (13:04):
Dude, Adam, it's really weird you mentioned that. For some reason,
when I'm hungover, I always feel the need to seed.
Speaker 2 (13:12):
Yeah, you got to get the poison out points.
Speaker 3 (13:14):
Yeah, what is that? What is that?
Speaker 2 (13:16):
Science? Hit the button? You guys are putting me to work.
Speaker 4 (13:20):
I mentioned this to Chloe because she's like, what is
your deal? Why are you so horny? When you're hungover.
Speaker 2 (13:26):
It's can I come in?
Speaker 3 (13:27):
No? Yes, Adam.
Speaker 4 (13:29):
I love that you're saying, why are you so horny
when you're hungover?
Speaker 3 (13:32):
Yeah? What is that?
Speaker 4 (13:33):
Because obviously she's not. She's like, if we, you know,
we drink together, we you know. She's like, I don't
why why are you touching me? Why are you grinding
up on me? And I'm like, well, now I have
to jerk off five times. If you don't, don't have
to texted me five times? Then I have to drink
off five times.
Speaker 2 (13:49):
You know where I'm going to be. And I know
I like that you. I like that you say it
in a normal tone when in reality, I know you
scream it. That seems I know that it's that Sandy.
I'm standing standing up side of the bed, t shirt on,
no pants, fully and gorged, shouting, now I'm gonna jerk
(14:09):
off five times.
Speaker 4 (14:10):
I guess I had to jerk off five times.
Speaker 3 (14:13):
I think maybe what I have calculated in my mind
is that like I feel, I feel so bad that
I want to feel I want to feel good.
Speaker 4 (14:21):
That's right, that's exactly yeah.
Speaker 2 (14:24):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (14:25):
But also I'm hoping that somehow the hangover comes out
through my penis and it's gone for the rest of
the time.
Speaker 4 (14:32):
That's also what I'm Yeah, I think that's what everybody's saying.
Speaker 2 (14:35):
Interesting.
Speaker 4 (14:36):
But but but hang on, so you don't sit down?
Where do you jerk off the roof?
Speaker 2 (14:41):
He's a true work aholic.
Speaker 3 (14:44):
Yeah, dude, I go to Van Eys and I go
to the workhol house, I go to Hamlin and I
really I really put in work. No, I feel like
if I'm ever doing it, it's either laying down or
standing up, but never just seated standing.
Speaker 2 (14:58):
Okay, well this is a shower since you're okay.
Speaker 4 (15:02):
Yeah, no, no, no, he hesitated, Uh standing up? Yeah?
Speaker 2 (15:08):
Are we in socks? This is dangerous.
Speaker 4 (15:10):
First of all, the shower. The shower sucks. The shower sucks.
You're not into it, No, of course, ka sucks. Uh
we're And and the way you hesitated when he said
this is obviously a shower situation, you were like, Uh,
that leads me to like you're just in a closet
somewhere in your home standing.
Speaker 2 (15:32):
Yeah. This is You're carrying so much shame and you
don't have to.
Speaker 4 (15:35):
You don't have to let it out on the pot,
let it out.
Speaker 3 (15:39):
I don't I feel like these are the times that
I wish Kyle was here, because he would say some
ship where he actually does something way up, more fucked up,
and I could allow you guys to go bury him.
But right now I feel like you guys are kind
of piling on me.
Speaker 4 (15:53):
I'm not piling I'm actually trying to get to the
bottom of this because you're the one.
Speaker 3 (15:57):
Who and I'm not sure I want it to get
to the bottom of I don't know if I actually
want to talk about this.
Speaker 2 (16:03):
Oh yeah, that's fine, that's fine. We can just you
know what, I will say, Kyle for sure has beat
off outside more than all of us combined. That's what
I think he's like, not in a good way.
Speaker 4 (16:16):
He'll go take a jerk off walk.
Speaker 3 (16:18):
Yeah, yeah, yes, he will take his shoes and socks off,
bury them in his garden, and then beat off on
his cucumbers for sure.
Speaker 4 (16:26):
No, and then and then use his uh dick shovel
to dig them back up. And that's how exactly.
Speaker 2 (16:33):
That's how he plants his seat. He fucks the ground.
Speaker 4 (16:35):
Yeah, he goes, uh, I'm I'm hunting for some earthworms, honey,
and then he puts his worm in the earth man.
Speaker 3 (16:43):
I've seen so many worm I'm gonna start doing that
a lot.
Speaker 4 (16:46):
By the way, you're catchphrase, you're suddenly just Wendy Williams.
Speaker 3 (16:59):
When Williams is probably the best show of all time.
She is an entertainer, she's the best.
Speaker 2 (17:06):
Let me use my new cast raise.
Speaker 3 (17:09):
I don't find her very fascinating.
Speaker 2 (17:11):
She's so cool. I don't disagree she's fascinating.
Speaker 4 (17:14):
Well, I want the world to know that Blake is
choosing not to talk about Yeah, we'll move how he
stands up and jerks off, and it's not the shower,
And that's a secret that he's that he's willing to
let be a secret instead of just.
Speaker 2 (17:31):
Are you on like a indoor board? Is this like
are you building skill sets?
Speaker 3 (17:36):
No?
Speaker 4 (17:37):
You know it's a secret. It's his secret. So now
we know that Blake has a secret out there.
Speaker 2 (17:42):
I just want to say that if you're doing this
in stocking feet, if you have socks on, it's slippery,
it's dangerous. And if that's how you die, that one's
for me.
Speaker 3 (17:52):
And when I start my Patreon it will be revealed
and I will I will take the TII citizens that
I really want to know and take them over to
my Patreon and it will be you have.
Speaker 2 (18:04):
To say t I nation citizens. Otherwise I don't know
if it works at all. I think it works for
every citizens. Blah blah blah nation. We'll work on it,
all right. What do you guys got to bring to
the table.
Speaker 4 (18:16):
Where I mean, I'm a pretty open book. I mentioned
that I jerk off. I gave times, I gave locations.
I you know, I was pretty open. You you're the
one with these deep dark secrets about how you jerk off.
Speaker 2 (18:30):
It's a revelation though.
Speaker 4 (18:31):
It really is the fact that you've that you only
stand and you never sit.
Speaker 2 (18:35):
The fact that Adam stands to ship and you stand
to jack off. I'm like, what do I stand to do?
If that's the three point stancer?
Speaker 4 (18:44):
Yeah, you don't stand for anything.
Speaker 2 (18:46):
That's true, damn it. I don't stand for anything spineless.
Speaker 3 (18:49):
Stand for the damn flag. I'll tell you what I
stand for, the damn flag. That's for damn sure?
Speaker 2 (18:54):
Is that what it is? Is there an American flag
in the room? Yeah? Absolutely, you take half.
Speaker 3 (19:00):
I take my hat off, I put it over my heart.
I stand and I start to freaking. Now that's disturbed.
Speaker 2 (19:08):
Let's see that Purple Mountain majesty. Absolutely, baby, what else?
Speaker 4 (19:26):
I mean, it'll be a few weeks old now, but
we're we're trying to stockpile some episodes up because I'm
gonna have a baby and then I'm gonna be out
of commission for a few weeks, and then Kyle who
no longer is part of the podcast. It can't just
be two guys. It's gotta be at least three. You know,
I'm gonna do you know, so in a few weeks.
(19:46):
We're are going to come out a few weeks late.
But Blake is going to the super Bowl, which I'm fine, stoked.
I can't wait to hear all about it.
Speaker 3 (19:54):
But the baby, Yeah, hopefully this is me two weeks
into my celebration. But I I'm very excited to.
Speaker 2 (20:01):
Go me two weeks good way to put it.
Speaker 3 (20:03):
Yeah, it's it's the first super Bowl. This is what's crazy.
It's in Las Vegas. Yeah, I know, that's a weird
place to have a damn super Bowl. It's gonna be right.
Speaker 4 (20:14):
Sounds fucking awesome.
Speaker 2 (20:15):
It does sound awesome.
Speaker 3 (20:16):
Yeah, I mean it is going to be very what
you're talking about. But it's just like it's almost too awesome.
That's what I'm worried about, is like, what the freaking
hell it is?
Speaker 2 (20:25):
I know what you're saying. It's like the it's like
the city's almost kind of like if you end up
somehow not going to the super Bowl for a whole
other reason, you might be fine, Like there's other shit
going down.
Speaker 4 (20:37):
Yeah, I feel like it's the only city that can
actually handle the super Bowl, like actually handle it because
there's so much going on there and there's so much
indoor space. You can actually once the once the game
is over, all of those people can go to thirty
different casinos and it won't feel that overwhelming. Yeah, when
(20:59):
like no other city has that. And like I went
to the super Bowl a few years ago Tampa Bay
first the Chiefs and it was in Tampa Bay and
there's like one stretch where people party in Tampa Bay
and it was fucking bedlam, dude, it was. It was scary.
(21:19):
There was multiple murders on that street that night.
Speaker 2 (21:22):
That's just Tampa, baby.
Speaker 4 (21:25):
It was like people got killed. There was like shootouts
and ship it was wild.
Speaker 3 (21:29):
But I think Tampa is like, yeah, Tampa's a wild place.
Speaker 4 (21:33):
Well sure, but I'm just saying like there was like
one main street, which is a lot of cities had
that where it's like you know, in Austin it's like
sixth Street. It's like a lot of places just have
the one main drag and that's where everybody goes. But Vegas,
I mean, the main drag is the Strip, but there's
like forty casinos that people can get lost in. I think.
I think it's a great point.
Speaker 2 (21:52):
We went when it was in New York that seemed
to be fine, and when I went when it was
in La I mean, of course that's super duper local
for a lot of people. The thing I'm noticing is
that it seems like it's become and maybe it's always
been this and I just haven't picked up on it,
but in this era we're in of like Grant for
the Gram, it seems like it's like, are you going
(22:12):
to the Super Bowl? As if like it's it's more
than just the game. If you don't give a fuck
about Super Bowl, there's at least thirty parties to go
to afterwards.
Speaker 3 (22:23):
Yeah, That's the thing that I've noticed that's weirder in
any other way, is like I think the Super Bowl
started on Monday for Las Vegas, Like, there's been parties
every day this week and it's only leading up to
Sunday and then Sunday will will Sunday will be the
grand celebration and depression.
Speaker 2 (22:47):
Yeah, but I feel like people might even be fucking
out of commission. I bet you that five percent of
the people who are supposed to go to the Super
Bowl for one reason or another aren't even gonna fucking go.
Speaker 3 (22:57):
Could you imagine if you fucking got the like six
thousand dollars ticket and you're just arrested.
Speaker 4 (23:03):
Yeah, they're just handcuffed to a bed in the at
the Bunny Ranch and.
Speaker 2 (23:06):
They're like, miss dude, I promise you. There's just a
lot of shit going on leading up to it. You
might be too hungover or whatever, like hot at the
table or like whatever, you're just not even gonna go.
Just not going.
Speaker 3 (23:18):
You're like, ah, wait, oh, ship the games on, like.
Speaker 2 (23:22):
Like the party is gonna be going, and you're gonna
be like, remember, we're gonna break this up and go
to the fucking game. I don't know who knows five percent. Yeah.
Speaker 4 (23:28):
Yeah, Well that being said, Blake, I'm very bummed, Uh
that I'm not gonna be you know, I'm obviously I'm yeah.
Our agent gave us, We gave us tickets. That's how
Blake got hooked up. And I know that they offer
He offered tickets to Durs and myself, And I'm bummed
that I couldn't be there because I know that the
game is gonna be great. I think it's gonna be
(23:50):
a really good game. And then beyond that, the parties
and how much fun we would have after the game
would be and before the game and the daily would
be a black game. It would be so much fun.
Speaker 2 (24:00):
Just sneak out what usher usher and usher at the
halftime Usher super halftime dude, Wow, how I just know
how hungover you're gonna be.
Speaker 4 (24:10):
You're gonna jerk off, like twelve times standing out in
that hotel. We're gonna jerk might.
Speaker 2 (24:15):
Do it sitting down. I might doing sitting down.
Speaker 4 (24:19):
You're gonna be standing up in that hotel room, just
cranking down.
Speaker 2 (24:24):
I do kind of want you to try sitting down,
just to like realize, like, does it feel better. It's
still it's an option. I don't know if it's better
for you, but it's an option, and I want you
to know that it's an option.
Speaker 4 (24:34):
Well, I will say it's better than standing up like
a fucking loun What do.
Speaker 2 (24:39):
You mean standing up? We found out Adam had a
bad bag because he was sitting beating off so much
that his back and they're like, well do you stand
up or sit down?
Speaker 4 (24:49):
Hey? That's that's that's the real stiff person.
Speaker 3 (24:52):
Hey, hey, wait, hell on, we got that.
Speaker 2 (24:58):
I feel like I feel like standing up.
Speaker 3 (25:00):
It's like a It's almost like guys can stand up
to pee, like we can do it, like I don't
know if girls stand up, and I don't know if
girls stand up in j oh. I feel like it's
an honor to be a male and stand up.
Speaker 2 (25:15):
J No, well to very cool. Well no, I couldn't
have said it better myself.
Speaker 4 (25:21):
It's not an honor.
Speaker 3 (25:24):
No, No, How often do you think females jo standing
up daily?
Speaker 2 (25:30):
If I know women daily, if.
Speaker 4 (25:32):
I know chicks the way I I know that, I
do never.
Speaker 3 (25:39):
Okay, So I'm embracing it.
Speaker 4 (25:42):
So you're you're you stand up to jerk off solely because.
Speaker 2 (25:47):
Because women can't okay, all right, it seems like you're
rubbing it in their faces.
Speaker 4 (25:52):
I stand up to Jay and that's one thing I
don't want you to do is rub your j O
in their faces.
Speaker 2 (25:59):
Yeah. Well too late, too late, boys, too late. So Blazer,
do you know where these seats are? Are you in
a box? Are you down out there?
Speaker 4 (26:14):
You're in a box? I know my poys up in
a box.
Speaker 3 (26:16):
Yeah, supposedly, I'm in the box of maybe the Jacksonville
Jaguar owner. Like every owner gets a box. And I
think I'm I think I'm linking up with the Jags, dude,
which I dig because you guys know I Jag stand
uniforms are off that jack stand and their uniforms are
pretty sick. So it's a Bay Area to Jacksonville connection
(26:39):
in the box?
Speaker 4 (26:40):
So are you? I mean, are you? Do you? Are
you gonna have to like beef up on your Jacksonville
Jaguar knowledge because you're gonna be the owner. So you
feel like maybe you should have like, yes.
Speaker 2 (26:50):
Who was their quarterback?
Speaker 3 (26:52):
Trevor Lawrence?
Speaker 2 (26:53):
Oh yeah, I think Trevor Lawrence has the largest face
I've ever seen in my life.
Speaker 3 (26:58):
It's yep, it's so big, not in a bad way.
Speaker 2 (27:01):
It's not a bad looking face. I'm just like it.
That's a lot. He has a lot of face, it's long,
it's why.
Speaker 3 (27:07):
Yeah, it looks like the girl who's the witch in
on the Nightmare before Christmas.
Speaker 2 (27:13):
But that is not what I'm saying. I'm just saying no.
Speaker 3 (27:15):
But it's not bad. It's not but not in a
bad way.
Speaker 4 (27:17):
I love that character, real sexy witch.
Speaker 2 (27:20):
Cool.
Speaker 3 (27:20):
Yeah, it's cool, and he looks great and he has
great hair and he's the man.
Speaker 2 (27:25):
Other than that, kind of like the mast from Saw
in a good way, in a really good way, a
way in a really good way.
Speaker 4 (27:35):
Yeah, it looks like, well, I wonder if he's going
to be I wonder if you are a football player.
Speaker 2 (27:40):
Are you you go? I'm not well.
Speaker 4 (27:44):
I mean, do you go to the super Bowl or
or do you go? I don't give a fuck. I'm
not there, so I actively don't care.
Speaker 2 (27:52):
You just saw football players in New York. We went.
I remember seeing Gronk and Gronk didn't play right.
Speaker 4 (27:59):
Yeah, but Gronk there to make money. He was like
doing endorsement deals. Shit.
Speaker 2 (28:03):
But I think they go to party.
Speaker 3 (28:04):
Maybe this goes back to being in Las Vegas. You go,
it's Las Vegas. Everyone goes, everyone goes. It's like NBA
All Star Weekend, it's green light.
Speaker 2 (28:13):
We go even though we're ballers, we go, right, we go, man,
let's go.
Speaker 4 (28:19):
I think All Star Weekend is actually in Vegas this
year for NBA. I believe let's go.
Speaker 3 (28:27):
Vegas is really uh really starting to stake acclaim, reclaim,
reclaim its identity.
Speaker 4 (28:35):
Wait, Vegas is really starting to now steak acclaim.
Speaker 3 (28:40):
I'm saying, it's saying like we are the hub, like
we are.
Speaker 4 (28:43):
The fun it's Las Vegas. I feel like it's been
the hub.
Speaker 2 (28:46):
It's been the hub, like the convention Hub.
Speaker 3 (28:50):
Hear me out. They got a football team, they're getting
a baseball team, they have a hockey, they're gonna they're
going to get an NBA team. They're saying like, come here,
now that gamble is legal. They're like, just yeah, let's
fucking kick it here.
Speaker 4 (29:04):
Yeah it is. It is the best. I like, I
haven't been in so damn long. I went for a
Green Day concert not too long ago, but then before that,
it was like five plus years that I that.
Speaker 3 (29:16):
I yeah, I'll be honest, I don't. I don't love Vegas.
Like I'm not a Vegas guy. I think it's healthy
to not say like give yourself over to Vegas, because
if you do, it can be dangerous.
Speaker 4 (29:28):
Sure, but I'm saying it's perfect for what it is.
It's the best I think for what because none of
us are like real club guys. And I think that's
why we didn't like Vegas when we were younger. But
now we're older, dude, So now we could go to
like be a little older and like go to a
dope dinner, get drunk, do some gambling, maybe go to
like one of those like like really cool lounges that aren't.
Speaker 3 (29:53):
Like one of those what is it call where like that,
like I don't know, like they're clothes off they dance.
There's people that are like not wearing all the clothes
they should.
Speaker 2 (30:07):
It's like a bar.
Speaker 4 (30:09):
And then why and then that's that's where you don't
sit down every Yeah.
Speaker 3 (30:13):
Blake, Blake's standing up in the corner like doing whatever
he's doing.
Speaker 4 (30:18):
Is always standing Yeah, yeah, I guess that's I I
noticed that about you when whenever we've been doing in
a strip club together, you're always standing up. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (30:28):
Huh, my hands in my pocket. Just with your friend,
I want to give him a lap dance. Can't no
lap no lap to dance. Sorry, move on.
Speaker 3 (30:35):
Why's he got to both his hands in his pocket? No,
he doesn't sit down. You can jump on his back,
He'll piggyback.
Speaker 2 (30:41):
You move on, Serenity.
Speaker 4 (30:43):
Get on those like cool lounges that aren't a club.
It's more of like you have like a dope dinner
and then it's like a cool, uh upscale bar. I
suppose yeah, yeah, you know.
Speaker 2 (30:54):
Yeah, I think Vegas is also like diversified. They know
that they want to have something for everybody.
Speaker 4 (30:59):
Yeah, you could really get in the mixed, dude, to
do whatever you want to do.
Speaker 2 (31:03):
That's what I meant to say. You can get in
the mixed. You can get in the mix.
Speaker 3 (31:06):
No, I think there's a little something for everybody in Vegas,
even football. Yeah. I just know that you can also
get into a lot of weird shit in Vegas. What
happens there stays there.
Speaker 2 (31:17):
You can get into weird shipping. Yeah, I guess you can. Yeah,
I guess so fucking sure.
Speaker 3 (31:23):
And by weird I mean lose a lot of money.
I'm just not like, I don't like to gamble.
Speaker 2 (31:29):
Is that what you meant by weird? I don't think
you know how the joke form works.
Speaker 4 (31:32):
You don't like to gamble, not even not even like
a little bit like like what we did when we
were in gamp in Philly and we're at the parks, Parks.
Speaker 2 (31:42):
Calino, Ben's Salem.
Speaker 4 (31:45):
We're in beautiful Ben Salem.
Speaker 5 (31:47):
Uh.
Speaker 4 (31:48):
You don't even like to gamble, which is a few
hundred bucks play some blackjack? Is that kind of thing?
Speaker 2 (31:53):
Not really?
Speaker 4 (31:54):
I like it. I also like to throw some craps around,
throw some dice.
Speaker 3 (31:58):
But you go in thinking you're gonna win. I go
in knowing I'm gonna lose, and then we all end
up losing.
Speaker 2 (32:04):
I go in knowing I'm gonna lose, and I'm just like,
how long can I fucking string this along? Me too?
Speaker 3 (32:09):
But what's so fun about going in like, yo, I'm
about to lose fucking all the money I just took
out of this ato because the drinks are free.
Speaker 4 (32:16):
Yeah, the drinks are free, and you're doing your shouting and.
Speaker 3 (32:18):
No, they're not free. They cost as much money as
you just took out of it. They're actually more expensive
than normal just because you get to playing.
Speaker 2 (32:25):
That's that's not how reality works. They're not more expensive
than normal.
Speaker 3 (32:29):
You are the target audience for a casino because you're like, oh,
I'm getting free beers, but really you're dropping fucking five six,
seven hundred dollars out of blackjack table.
Speaker 2 (32:39):
But also I couldn't be winning or I'm losing. So
like if I'm winning, great, but I'm also losing and
paying to be playing. Yeah, like the entertainment. I pay
for the entertainment of playing, and then the drinks are free.
Speaker 3 (32:51):
I understand the contents.
Speaker 2 (32:55):
It's like, hey, you know, it's like how you know,
weird things having in Vegas.
Speaker 3 (32:58):
I understand playing blackjack isn't that fun. I'd rather play
fucking Mario Brothers. That's a little more stimulating than playing blackjacks.
Speaker 2 (33:07):
If they do, I would love to go to a
casino where I can play Mario for a thousand bucks.
Speaker 3 (33:14):
And I bet I would.
Speaker 2 (33:15):
I bet I would. You can play the mlooth Brothers.
Speaker 4 (33:18):
I don't think that they have Mario, but they actually
do have video games that you can gamble on in Vegas.
Where is it they have like the video game lounges.
They're they're all over I think all the main casinos.
Speaker 2 (33:31):
I know he is listening.
Speaker 3 (33:32):
Well, I don't if it's like modern warfare. I don't
know if I can hang, but if they have like contra,
I think I could. I think I could make some
money like sign me Up or bubble Bobble or balloon fight.
I'm really good at those times.
Speaker 4 (33:44):
Well, I don't know, maybe if they have balloon fight,
your radar at them. I don't think they have contra
or balloon fight, but yeah, I'm.
Speaker 2 (33:54):
Sure not sure about balloon fight.
Speaker 3 (33:57):
I don't know.
Speaker 4 (34:06):
What I want to do in Vegas is I want
to go. I've never gone and just sat there and
like they're in March and chircked off. And I've never
gone and just watched like March Madness and gone like
during March Madness.
Speaker 2 (34:21):
And just watching games at one of those giant bars. Yeah.
Speaker 4 (34:23):
Yeah, one of those sports books and you just go
with your buddies and put money onto all the games.
So it's like, you know, it's extra exciting, and then
just sit there and get drunk and sit there all
day long.
Speaker 2 (34:33):
Isn't Isn't it? Isn't there a place called sports book?
I think my homie is a bartender there, the guy
I went to high school with.
Speaker 4 (34:39):
Oh, every casino has this sports book that's what it's called.
Speaker 2 (34:44):
I think there's a place called sports Book where like
it's a rooftop outdoor bar with a giant fucking TV.
Speaker 4 (34:50):
My don't mind if I do.
Speaker 3 (34:52):
If that's the one, like with the pool, I feel
like they like, yeah, they it's like off.
Speaker 2 (34:55):
The strip, it's a little down the road. Anyway, put
my feelers out, check it out. I'll put you in touch.
Speaker 4 (35:01):
Well, I'm excited for you, Blake.
Speaker 2 (35:02):
I hope as we're speaking, my team won. I hope
they have contrast.
Speaker 4 (35:06):
I personally hope your team doesn't win, doesn't win.
Speaker 3 (35:10):
But yeah, why is that?
Speaker 4 (35:11):
Well, my family were Midwestern and they all are huge
Kansas City fans. So you know, you.
Speaker 3 (35:17):
Guys already won a bunch, man, just give me this one.
Speaker 4 (35:20):
So is the forty nine ers. Dude, they've also won
a fucking time.
Speaker 3 (35:23):
It was so long ago I was just a baby.
Speaker 2 (35:25):
Weren't they just there and lost it?
Speaker 4 (35:27):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (35:27):
Yeah, they've lost very recently several times. Dude, Come on,
so that's what they do. Let us get over to
the hump.
Speaker 4 (35:33):
Yeah yeah, yeah, I'm with you. I understand, And that's
why I'm like, if the Chiefs lose, sick my boy
Blake is having a fucking awesome time in Vegas a lot,
So I'm not that mad at it. But but I
think it's cool that they have such a dynasty as
the Kent City Chiefs. So I think it's pretty rare.
Speaker 2 (35:51):
It's special, it's it's to be respected. Yeah, I do
like watching christ and McCaffrey play.
Speaker 4 (35:57):
Yes, in those pants? Is that you're saying that dude,
as the kids say, he got a cheat code? Absolutely,
you're saying in those pants or what?
Speaker 2 (36:05):
I don't even know what that means.
Speaker 3 (36:08):
You like, just watch him play in the pant those pants,
you like football pants, those type football pants or what?
Speaker 4 (36:14):
What? What do you mean?
Speaker 2 (36:14):
Do you like football pants? I like watching him play football.
Speaker 4 (36:19):
Okay, okay, in those pants.
Speaker 2 (36:23):
Yeah he's wearing like okay, he is wearing pants, right, Okay,
So I'm sorry. I thought I wasn't sure what you're saying. Yeah,
but I do he would like seeing him play in
those I know.
Speaker 4 (36:38):
I know my boy durs When he says things like that,
I feel he's a little a little disturbed.
Speaker 2 (36:45):
You're right, because when I see Christian McCaffrey come on
screen in those pants, it's like.
Speaker 3 (36:52):
Wait, I that was not That was not an ali.
Speaker 4 (37:00):
That was a long way to go.
Speaker 2 (37:02):
But I will have my finger ready. I feel like
when you watch him, you know, here's my thing. When
I watch him play, he's so fucking fast. His legs
are willing so quickly, and he's cutting left and right.
That you go, yeah, that makes sense. But when I
watched Travis Kelcey, I don't understand how he's always in
the right place at the right time. He doesn't seem
(37:23):
like especially quick or like that he makes these crazy cuts.
He just seems like he gets to where the ball's
gonna go and he brings it down. I mean, it's
some outrageously what is the wild catches in the last game.
But I'm always like.
Speaker 3 (37:41):
Well, he's a tight end. Tight ends, that's they're not
wide receivers. They don't have like the quickness. They're just big,
like freaking hulks.
Speaker 4 (37:48):
And he's just a giant.
Speaker 2 (37:49):
But what was like Terrell Owens, he was a wide
receiver and he has any fucking fast as fuck and
cutting people and.
Speaker 3 (37:56):
Yeah, dude, wide receivers are insane. That's like Jerry right,
and so wait, sorry, what's Travis kelce d d so
when they aren't catching the ball, they're like blocking, so
they have to be like really big dudes. But when
they do catch the ball, and if they're athletic, then
all of a sudden, it's like a tank running down
the field.
Speaker 4 (38:17):
And it was my boy, Tony Gonzalez that kind of
changed the modern day tight end.
Speaker 3 (38:23):
Correct, there we go, that's Kansas City, right.
Speaker 4 (38:26):
Yeah, it was a Kansas City chief, Tony Gonzalez, who
I did that Amazon commercial with super nice guy, great
skin and he still looks like he could play football.
The guys like still just jagged, like did not let
himself go so and I was right next to him
standing the entire time. But yeah, so he kind of
(38:49):
changed what the modern day tight end is is like
a little more athletic than what they used to be,
much like the Grondkinader. And then now we got Travis Kelcey.
Speaker 3 (38:59):
Oh yeah, big gronk. Yeah, big guys.
Speaker 2 (39:02):
Gronk at least with like fake he'd like make cuts.
Speaker 4 (39:05):
They're just make you seem like he's a little more athletic.
Speaker 2 (39:08):
I think, so he seemed like he was. I mean,
he's so big that like he's so big you don't
realize how fast he is. Yeah, you just want to
see him standing there in his pants.
Speaker 3 (39:18):
I'd rather see him sitting down, Honestly, I'd love to
see what down. I feel like he could do a
lot sitting down, just like just like my homies.
Speaker 4 (39:29):
So what why why can't you? I've got family coming
in town and Chloe's giving birth next week. That's why
I'm not going to the super Bowl, durs. You just
have like family stuff.
Speaker 2 (39:37):
Emma's going skiing. I'm with the kids all weekend. There
we go. Do you think bad point?
Speaker 4 (39:42):
Do you think you get tad points by taking you
take them to Vegas?
Speaker 2 (39:47):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (39:48):
You you know, you stay at a kid friendly hotel,
the Circus Circus.
Speaker 2 (39:53):
Yeah, I feel like he could be fun.
Speaker 3 (39:56):
You pay the waiter to watch them in the pool,
give them a bucket of quarters. Yeah yeah, you give
them a bucket of quarters and say hit hit the arcade.
Speaker 4 (40:05):
Which, by the way, this is what my parents used
to do.
Speaker 3 (40:07):
Like, yeah, wait, the first casino you ever went to
was it with your parents?
Speaker 4 (40:12):
Right? Yes? And it was the uh, what's the like
Aladdin's Castle one, the one that is like in Vegas.
Speaker 3 (40:18):
In Vegas? You went to Vegas? That was your first Uh,
casino experience.
Speaker 4 (40:23):
Yeah, I think so. Like I was like fourteen or thirteen,
however old that's damn and uh we stayed at what's
the one that that like the dragon comes out and
breeze fire Excaloxcalibur. We stayed there by the way.
Speaker 3 (40:36):
Yeah, fucking place rocks.
Speaker 4 (40:38):
It doesn't, dude, it doesn't.
Speaker 2 (40:40):
It's reeks hilarious.
Speaker 4 (40:41):
It reeks a mold.
Speaker 2 (40:42):
It's pretty bad.
Speaker 3 (40:43):
Yeah, is it still there? I love that it's so bad.
That's what I love about.
Speaker 4 (40:47):
Yeah, it's so bad.
Speaker 2 (40:48):
They're going to tear it down soon, right.
Speaker 3 (40:50):
They have to if it's not already gone.
Speaker 4 (40:51):
And then and then they like were like, hey, we'll
take you to Circus Circus. That'll be fun. And then
we go to Circus Circus and then they I mean,
they're not like degenerate gamblers, but they're in Vegas, so
they're gonna want to like gamble a little bit. And
then they just gave us quarters and we just sat
at the shitty arcade at Circus Circus and played play
video games.
Speaker 3 (41:11):
Time Crisis, Like, did your parents take you to Vegas?
Speaker 2 (41:14):
This is not on my childhood.
Speaker 3 (41:16):
No, I didn't go to Vegas.
Speaker 4 (41:18):
My parents were cheap, and they got like a it
was like a discounted tickets and hotel room stay because
you can. They do give great discounts. That'd being said,
it's don't take your children to Vegas unless especially if
your kid is like thirteen fourteen. I was so horny.
Speaker 2 (41:34):
Yeah, I do like the idea of my me like
sending my kids to like the slot machine and then
just they're at tal just fucking it's holding it down
in a cabana. Yeah, they probably could, dude, They're so jacked,
they'd probably do well.
Speaker 4 (41:49):
They're ripped, they're shredded, shredded.
Speaker 3 (41:51):
The first time I ever went to Vegas was I
think it was my eighteenth birthday and my dad and
my stepmom they took me to see the Blue Man
Group and that shit was off the fucking hook.
Speaker 4 (42:03):
Dude, we went to Vegas once with you and your dad?
Was that your twenty first birthday?
Speaker 3 (42:09):
That was my twenty first and the wheels really came off.
That shit was fun too, and then.
Speaker 4 (42:14):
We I remember, for whatever reasons I look back, it
must have been kind of cold because I was like
wearing a cardigan, and I, by the way, hate cardigans.
Speaker 2 (42:24):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (42:25):
Never wore them, and for whatever reason.
Speaker 2 (42:27):
It was the it was the era.
Speaker 4 (42:28):
This this Vega, this Vegas trip. I'm wearing a goddamn cardigan.
Speaker 3 (42:33):
I think I think we were all like tried to
dress as cool as we could. And you so somehow
found a cardigan somewhere and you're like, I think this
is what's trending right now.
Speaker 4 (42:45):
Yeah. I think we tried to like age up like ourselves,
to be like not just like because we looked like
children when we were twenty Oh my god. Well not
Kyle kind of always looked like a thirty eight year
old divorced dad. But yeah, but we looked like kids.
And uh, and I think that was my way of
looking a little older is a.
Speaker 2 (43:08):
It's like, yo, mister Rogers.
Speaker 4 (43:10):
If you told me Blake was wearing a fedora during
this time, I would believe.
Speaker 2 (43:14):
That I wasn't.
Speaker 3 (43:15):
But I was definitely wearing like a black T shirt
that had like fake jewelry like on it.
Speaker 2 (43:21):
Out like the necklace print or whatever.
Speaker 3 (43:24):
Yes, yes, I'll post it.
Speaker 2 (43:26):
That's cool.
Speaker 3 (43:27):
I have a lot of photos. It's my twenty first birthday,
so I have those photos. But I went there before that.
I went for my eighteenth birthday. I saw Blue Man
Group and I think I saw David Copperfield too, which
was fucking off the chains.
Speaker 4 (43:41):
See that's what I'm saying. By the way, I want
to do what and what movie was it that? Was
it super bad? Not super bad? Was it knocked up?
Speaker 2 (43:50):
This is?
Speaker 4 (43:51):
This is where they go and was it.
Speaker 2 (43:52):
This supporting and they go and do uh maybe it
is knocked out.
Speaker 4 (43:54):
Yeah, they go and do mushrooms and then see circus
so late. I'm like that to me sounds like an
absolute wonderful day in Vegas.
Speaker 2 (44:04):
You can you watch the super Bowl with this new
sphere thing? I gotta go to the sphere? Can you
watch the Super Bowl? Are they gonna er?
Speaker 3 (44:10):
That would be brilliant. Of course I don't think that
is what is happening, but that would be absolutely brilliant.
But also I don't know, what would it be like
watching a football game in a like dome form Awesome?
Speaker 4 (44:22):
Well, dude, it would be. It'd be like you're at
the game.
Speaker 2 (44:24):
It would be great.
Speaker 4 (44:25):
It would be fucking phenomenal.
Speaker 3 (44:27):
Yeah, I feel like you might want to throw up too.
Speaker 2 (44:29):
Though they would sort it out.
Speaker 4 (44:30):
Well, you're not watching it like it's you're not like
hovering above. It'll be like the game is happening here
and then this.
Speaker 2 (44:37):
So it'd be all around you.
Speaker 3 (44:38):
When you watch football, it's straight ahead. It would be
three sixty.
Speaker 2 (44:42):
I guess what. I would trust the people who develop
the way you watch things to do it right. Not
year one, not year one, What do you mean they've
been people have been going that set. It's off the
fucking chain.
Speaker 3 (44:55):
It does look cool, but they're not ready to pipe
in the super Bowl. Maybe year five they'll be ready.
Speaker 2 (45:00):
Listen to me, all they have to do is just
broadcast it as a big ass TV and had the
recipe black. It can be the sky, it can be whatever.
Speaker 3 (45:07):
Well, then why would you want to be in there?
That place seems like it sucks. You're trapped in up
fucking because.
Speaker 2 (45:13):
You're with twenty thousand people watching a game, drinking and
kicking it.
Speaker 4 (45:17):
It doesn't sound bad.
Speaker 2 (45:18):
That's literally every casino like sports room like, but it's
so much bigger, dude, it's not.
Speaker 4 (45:24):
It's not. It's it's the it's the because it's the
sphere and you're with the five thousand other people. However,
many people fit in this goddamn.
Speaker 2 (45:32):
Sphere look, just because you're actually going in the game.
Fuck you you can come too. Come on, bring the boys,
let's go, dude, Yeah.
Speaker 4 (45:40):
Bring the play go.
Speaker 2 (45:42):
I wanted to take them to a monster truck rally.
But it's next weekend.
Speaker 3 (45:45):
God damn, what the hell, let's go.
Speaker 4 (45:48):
I think it was this past weekend.
Speaker 5 (45:49):
Uh.
Speaker 2 (45:50):
Down here in Anaheim, it was the past and it's
the next That's what got my I was like, oh,
it's probably a couple of weekends, and uh I was wrong.
What else? What else? What else?
Speaker 4 (46:01):
What else to talk about? That's Blake Blake to tell
us his mystery.
Speaker 3 (46:07):
Uh, no, way that. Actually I have something I'd like
to bring up. Did you know that they are discontinuing
just continuing fruit stripe gum?
Speaker 4 (46:20):
You guys? Any apologies?
Speaker 2 (46:27):
Dude?
Speaker 4 (46:27):
Didn't he take that?
Speaker 2 (46:28):
Doesn't? I think we can even skip it. Uh let's see,
I'll see around Blake, have a good.
Speaker 4 (46:33):
Time, Blake. I mean, yeah, that that gum sucks and
it probably shouldn't.
Speaker 3 (46:38):
No, no, no, no, it is what it is in terms
of flavor. But I feel like it means something to me.
Speaker 2 (46:46):
I feel like it means something. Oh, I think they're
saying it's over and they're just going to bring it
back with flavor.
Speaker 4 (46:54):
So people like Blake or like it means something to
me that gum due does.
Speaker 2 (47:00):
Like remember when like they were like we're closing, Nate.
Now it's like, isn't that ship back open? And everyone
is writing like these diatribes on Instagram about like the
first meeting I ever took about being a writer?
Speaker 4 (47:10):
Was it? Well, say classic American Los Angeles diner, right, Nate, now, yes, yes, yes,
this is a gum.
Speaker 2 (47:20):
And I would say the fruit striped gum is a
quintessential gum for children across.
Speaker 3 (47:26):
The fruit stripe gum no juicy fruit. I think it's worldwide.
You take juicy fruit over over fruit striped gum.
Speaker 4 (47:34):
Fruit stripe was the one with like little zebras on it,
and ship the zebra.
Speaker 3 (47:37):
Was cool, yes, and tattoos and tattoos like temporary tattoos.
Speaker 4 (47:42):
It doesn't mean anything to me.
Speaker 2 (47:44):
And it was bigger, you got way more pieces.
Speaker 3 (47:48):
I honestly want to say that last thing I ever
bought with my own money was a fruit stripe gum.
Speaker 4 (47:56):
If you were to tell me that their discontinuous.
Speaker 2 (47:59):
Is a fruit stripe gun gone.
Speaker 4 (48:04):
If you were to tell me that they're discontinuing like
now and later.
Speaker 2 (48:07):
I'm disturbed.
Speaker 4 (48:08):
Then I would be they would do something to me,
but fruit striped gone now and later.
Speaker 2 (48:12):
Yeah, but they wouldn't discontinue now and later.
Speaker 3 (48:14):
No, now and laters aren't aren't that good?
Speaker 4 (48:16):
I would?
Speaker 2 (48:17):
I agree? I actually hate now laters.
Speaker 3 (48:19):
Yeah, they're too hard.
Speaker 2 (48:20):
I can't. I'm like this, I'm like, this is going
to be living in my teeth. I can't get this
out because.
Speaker 4 (48:25):
You save it for later.
Speaker 2 (48:27):
Sure, sure, okay, fair enough.
Speaker 4 (48:29):
You have some now and then some of it gets
stuck in your teeth, and that's the later.
Speaker 2 (48:34):
When they're too hard. They're kind of sharp too. When
they're hard, Yeah, stiff man, And can we chop? Can
we chop that sound bite? Because I need that for
the board?
Speaker 4 (48:44):
Had hard?
Speaker 2 (48:47):
Yeah, I just like, I don't know, you need another
four inches? Remember when you would suck the jolly the
flat long jolly brancher, you could suck into a shape, dude.
And can I get that for the board?
Speaker 4 (48:59):
Everything that would slob into a shank as it can?
Speaker 2 (49:03):
Can I get that for the board? The jolly rand,
the big flat jolly rancher, you could you could just
suck it in a way, dude, dude that you could
turn into a sharp ass shank or.
Speaker 4 (49:14):
Like a candy cane when you would just deep throat
it and then slob on it until sure it would
get into a shank or like.
Speaker 3 (49:23):
Like a like a like a raw cabasa, and you
would just kind of nibble on the tip a little
bit and just sort of like tease tease the tip
of it.
Speaker 4 (49:32):
Now we were talking candy, dude, you know you got
you get all sexual with it?
Speaker 2 (49:37):
Are you trying? I don't know. I feel like you're
trying to do a joke or something. We're talking about candy.
Speaker 4 (49:40):
It's not all about bits here. Okay, you brought up
the gum?
Speaker 2 (49:45):
Can you tell us the tale of Rumpel? Still skin
right quick? You wish?
Speaker 3 (49:49):
No, no, we gotta do durseys uh kid's story Corners
huns Christian unders stories.
Speaker 2 (49:57):
Yeah, what do you got, dude? You got something?
Speaker 3 (49:59):
Man?
Speaker 2 (50:00):
Humpty dumpty? What do we got? Bro? Hit us with it?
Did he write The Little Mermaid?
Speaker 3 (50:04):
It's possible.
Speaker 2 (50:05):
I think I think you might have ye class damn class.
Speaker 4 (50:08):
I would love to hear that ship Hans Christian Anderson
is that right, it's Christian Anderson.
Speaker 2 (50:12):
He's got some bangers, dude.
Speaker 4 (50:14):
That guy knew was up.
Speaker 2 (50:15):
I got a five hundred page book of Hans Christian
Andersen stories.
Speaker 4 (50:18):
I remember when you bought that.
Speaker 2 (50:20):
Yeah, huh, I don't like it. I bought in college,
but I love you. No, Adam bought it for you.
Speaker 4 (50:27):
No, I remember you at least having that when we
were like young, and you were like, I have this
five hundred page book, and I was.
Speaker 2 (50:33):
Like, carries it around all the time.
Speaker 3 (50:35):
He's fucking weirdo, dude.
Speaker 4 (50:36):
I was like, how many pages.
Speaker 2 (50:38):
Keeps like windows propped open? It's stick enough to keep
a window open, little breeze.
Speaker 4 (50:42):
And yeah, it's your doorstop.
Speaker 3 (50:44):
Yeah, this dude would pull up the Second City with
the fucking Hans Christian Anderson book, Like have you heard
the Tale of I'm what's crazy?
Speaker 2 (50:52):
Is I read? I only read it standing up.
Speaker 4 (50:55):
All of his references are the Goldie Locks and rumpel Stilts.
Speaker 2 (51:00):
Mm hmma, I don't know.
Speaker 4 (51:05):
Guy.
Speaker 2 (51:05):
He does have hell a banger though that You're like, oh,
that's you think it was all the same guy.
Speaker 4 (51:09):
All of Jersey's improv beats where I'm gonna huff and
puff and blow over this door. We're like, uh, well
we're in a doctor's office, but all.
Speaker 2 (51:18):
Right, crossbows and mustaches is actually uh hons and Fritz
the fucking.
Speaker 3 (51:24):
The first The first season of Workaholics was too cold,
the second season was too hot, the third was just right,
and then four or five six that.
Speaker 2 (51:35):
Is due reading the list of things. Oh, the Emperor's
new clothes. We all know that bad.
Speaker 3 (51:40):
Oh, that one's actually really cool. That's where he just
has public nudity.
Speaker 4 (51:44):
Yeah, he's all button naked.
Speaker 2 (51:45):
And that's when you just turn on CNN and they're
all like, it's just the Emperor's new clothes.
Speaker 4 (51:50):
All right, that's Drake.
Speaker 2 (51:53):
Oh topical hold.
Speaker 4 (51:55):
Of any take backs, apologies and the epic slam boys.
Speaker 2 (52:00):
Oh man, I just want to take back anything I
said that made Blake feel uncomfortable about usually jacking off
standing up. I think it's cool for you, it's not
necessarily what I prefer.
Speaker 4 (52:12):
Yeah, yeah, I also was going to bring that.
Speaker 2 (52:14):
And it's not like I've never done it. I've definitely
done it. But on one hand, how many times.
Speaker 4 (52:21):
We've all done it. It's weird how Blake was so
kind of standoffish and defensive about how much he's done
it or like where he does it. Usually we're all
very open and honest and it's cool, and I'm sure
I'm the ugly definitely give flowers because we don't do that,
but I think it is. I would like to pay
(52:43):
my respects to Blake for keeping some things for himself
and have his secrets, okay.
Speaker 2 (52:48):
And just to kind of the princess and the peak. Yeah,
and just to kind.
Speaker 3 (52:52):
Of build off what you guys are talking about, like
fruit Stripe, gun Man, I'm gonna miss you man, all right.
Speaker 4 (53:00):
Yeah, we can end it there, all right, And that's
another episode
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