Two Ts Presents: Popping Off: "Kiss Kiss, Revenge Bang" (VPR Ep 9)

Teddi and Emily are recapping the 9th episode of Vanderpump Rules!

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:02):
Hi, guys, this is Teddy Mellencamp and I'm joined by
my friend Emily Simpson for our new spin off show
Popping Off, where we are digging deep on this season
of Vanner Pump Rules. Hi guys, welcome to another episode
of Popping Off with myself, Teddy Mellencamp and and Emily Simpson.
Thanks for joining us. We are excited to, you know,

(00:24):
try to entertain you for the next before they cut
us off, before they before we get the message on
the group chat, it's like, hey, guys, wrap it up.

Speaker 2 (00:37):
We've heard enough of your voices.

Speaker 1 (00:39):
And yeah, so we are going to be recapping Todays
season eleven, episode nine and The Valley season one, episode two.

Speaker 2 (00:51):
What was your favorite to watch of the two? I
actually enjoy.

Speaker 1 (00:55):
The Valley me too.

Speaker 2 (00:58):
I don't know why, but I do.

Speaker 1 (01:01):
I like it.

Speaker 2 (01:02):
I find it a little more amusing.

Speaker 1 (01:04):
Maybe it's because of Jack's I actually find him to
be really entertaining. Entertaining, I mean not somebody I would
want to be married to, no, or maybe even be
friends with or hang out with. But like I'll watch
from a distance. Yeah, like watching from watching the train
Wreck from a distance is really entertaining. I find him

(01:25):
extremely entertaining. No, we appreciate him and likes a bit
like listen, I know that we like to get involved
in mess. I don't think there's another person out there
that loves mess more than Jack's. No, he like thrives
in it and looks forward to it, and then and
then tries to justify.

Speaker 2 (01:46):
Oh, but then A's confused, Oh, like, what do you
mean this is?

Speaker 1 (01:50):
What? What do you mean? Is that not a good idea?
Should I not have said that? Is that what you mean?
I shouldn't have invited somebody completely inappropriate and then been
that people didn't embrace it? Right? Weird. But before we
get into recapping the episodes, of course, we have some headlines.
This first one, I just before we even say what

(02:11):
it is, let's just give a round of applause to
Ariana for.

Speaker 2 (02:15):
What Because she has bought a new home.

Speaker 1 (02:19):
Oh yeah, right, she bought a one point six million
dollar home in LA after post split real estate battle
with x Tom Sandoval. The recently renovated mid century modern house,
located in Los Angeles, was originally built in nineteen sixty two.
The main level of the three bedroom, two backs I'm
like this is a lot of information. I would have

(02:40):
been fine with just the picture, but there was a
way to plug an additional show buying. Beverly hillstar Ben
Bellack was the seller's agent for the sale. As previously reported,
Sandoval was hoping to buy Maddox out of their shared home. However,
she wanted them to sell it and split the proceeds.

(03:01):
In January twenty twenty four, Mattix south Sandoval to force
the cell of their home.

Speaker 2 (03:06):
He however, rejected her request to be illegal.

Speaker 1 (03:08):
Documents filed in late February and a judge has not
yet decided on that matter. So finally she was like,
you know what, ef it? Why haven't money?

Speaker 2 (03:17):
Here's the question though, So then is she's still paying
half the mortgage on the other house and now paying
a mortgage on a new house. Well, I don't think
she was paying the mortgage anyway, So she just stop paying? Yeah,
Like I feel like she stopped paying because the other
reports we've seen are like the back and forth from
the after show, her explaining that she was waiting for

(03:40):
the documentation of the splitting up of the finances and
that you used to be a joint account essentially everything
they said was confusing to me. If you didn't trust
what he was charging you for a cable, you still
do know what your mortgage is and what half of
that is. And also you're a homeowner, so the duty
is on you. I'm sure you can find out what

(04:01):
the cable bill is. I'm sure you know what the
water bill is. I mean, are you just you just.

Speaker 1 (04:07):
Live there and have no idea about what the expenses are?
But also if you don't, you I'm going to give
you a little trick. You can have Anne call Spectrum
and say, Hi, my name's Ariano Maddox and my code
is whatever seven five one seven? What's my monthly bill?

(04:29):
Is that your code that you just gave everybody? Because
I had to rethink, I had.

Speaker 2 (04:33):
To read, I almost gave my code, and then I
was like, shit.

Speaker 1 (04:36):
Back up, why don't you to tell everyone.

Speaker 2 (04:37):
My password to my entire life?

Speaker 1 (04:42):
But I am happy she's moving into a new place,
but I also am curious what this means for that
house and who's going to fumigate the bedroom?

Speaker 2 (04:51):
Well, yes, she's gonna have to hire like what some
I don't know some what is that hot moving company?

Speaker 1 (04:58):
You know? Arthur's like those hot college guys. Is it come?
What does that call me? Where they don't have their
shirts on? I mean that's who I would use if
I were going to move. And also I am curious
for next season, if there's a next season, will her
bedroom look in the same condition at her new house? Like?
Is this just how she lives regardless or only how
she lives when she needs to stay primarily in the bedroom.

Speaker 2 (05:21):
That is a good question. I think she just lives
like that. She just likes to hoard. She likes hoarding.

Speaker 1 (05:27):
Do you think she'll invite us over here too, No,
absolutely not. She's like, f them, well somebody else, she said,
f them too. As her brother, Jeremy Maddox said he
hasn't spoken to his sister in months. Via this US
Weekly article ay yea yaie, Jeremy sparked a speculation that

(05:50):
he's on the outs with the sister after hugging her
ex boyfriend Tom at an event. He was asked about
the alleged Brindley encounter during the Friday, March twenty second
episode of Pump Rules podcast. Obviously, I'm going to stand
by my sister, but yeah, I need to talk to Tom.
I would love to talk to my sister, but I
haven't heard from her in months. Jeremy also weighed and

(06:14):
on whether he will continue to keep distance from him
and Sandival, adding, depending on how long it takes for
me to hear from my sister will determine on whether
I stick to that stance or not. He also continued,
people need to realize that I lived with both of
them for a long time, so it affected me too.
I lost a friend, I lost someone that was I

(06:35):
was also in a mutual relationship of love.

Speaker 2 (06:38):
Oh wow, you know this goes back to what we
talked about before, where I really feel like her inability
to just allow people to move and navigate around Sandbal
on their own terms and however they want to, Like
she's trying to control absolutely everyone and everyone's relationship with him.

Speaker 1 (06:56):
That's got to be exhausting, Like why can't she just
be Like I think Sandoval is a douchebag, so I'm not.
I don't want to be friends with him, but right,
go for it exactly. I don't understand the need to
control everyone else's thoughts, emotions, actions when it comes to
Tom Sandival, Like let it go, Like I get it,
he shouldn't go to Thanksgiving dinner at your house where

(07:19):
your brother and you are. But like if your brother
sees him out and wants to say hi, and what's
the big deal, I don't know. Well, apparently for her,
it's a big deal. She hasn't spoken to her brother
in month, So that's sad. Now you're letting Now you're
letting Tom Sandival trickle into your relationship with your sibling.
Like that's too much control, that's too much power that

(07:40):
you're letting him have. Yeah, and also that's not a storyline,
so this is not even like for TV drama or anything.
You're like, you're not even getting paid for that, So
you're even hate to have this family drama because your
brother is currently not on the show. So I don't
get it.

Speaker 2 (07:59):
La La can response to rumors she had a friendship
ending fight with Ariana Maddox at the VPR reunion.

Speaker 1 (08:05):
In an at article, Lala addressed the tweet from fan
account Bravo Babe that stirred rumors, stating, rumor is that
Ariana eviscerated? I like that word. That's a big word,
aviscerative word, Lalla. At the end of the reunion, like
friendship over type of situation. In response, Lalla engage with
the host, stating, only one of.

Speaker 2 (08:27):
Those things is true. I'll let y'all decide. In addition
to this, Laala also dissed Katie Maloney. After filming the reunion,
Kent gave her Instagram followers a cryptic look at where
her friendship with Maloney stands. On Saturday, when doing a
question and answer session on her story, she was asked
because on watch What Happens Live with Katie, Andy hinted

(08:49):
that you two aren't cool with each other, and Laala responded,
I'm sure if I go back to being real miserable,
we'll get thick again. She added at the bottom, contemplated
not posting this because I love her mom.

Speaker 1 (09:02):
Sorry, r I like that. I like her caveat at
the end, She's like, yeah, I'm a bitch and fuck her.
But love you? What is it?

Speaker 3 (09:14):
L l y?

Speaker 1 (09:15):
Yeah? What is l l y? Love you like a sister?
Like also tear tear, tear, tair, love you tair not
so so much. Your daughter can go of herself. And
when I want to go back to being a miserable
human being all week we consider.

Speaker 2 (09:39):
But that being said, this episode, Katie wasn't that miserable.
She's actually quite a good time.

Speaker 1 (09:46):
I actually enjoyed Katie this episode me too. But wait,
let me ask you a question, though, And when La
La says you decide which one, what do you think
it was? I think she's saying, do you really think
Arianna could eviscerate me with her words? Is I guess right?
Because I have seen Ariana be able to eviscerate I

(10:10):
just don't know that Ariana could eviscerate Laala. Yeah. My
money is always a Lalla. Yeah. I mean we'll have
to see, though, we'll have to see. I mean, Ariana
for sure thinks that she did if this is all
being leaked already, so I guess we'll just be the judge.
And if she did aviscerate her, I'm curious what she said.
Is it going to be pasted? Uf? About rand? Do

(10:31):
we care?

Speaker 3 (10:32):
Like?

Speaker 1 (10:33):
So on and so forth. They're all at this point,
all of them have been lying cheaters at some point,
which is true to this episode. So exactly viscerate away? Yes, this,
Oh gosh, honestly I need. I was having a little
bit of empathy with for Rachel for a little bit,
but at this point She's bugging me more than Ariana

(10:57):
because her inability to.

Speaker 2 (10:58):
Stop talking about right at this point.

Speaker 1 (11:03):
Like, if you want to heal from him, talk about
him in therapy, but you're not on a television show
anymore where you need to speak about him every single time.

Speaker 2 (11:13):
Because now, so on her podcast, what is the premise
of her podcast. Is she just supposed to talk about
scandabal or she supposed to be talking about other things.

Speaker 1 (11:23):
Well, I mean, it's Rachel Go's rogue, so Rachel talks
about it. I haven't to be honest, I can't really
listen to more than the clips, but I did. I
did see in one of her clips, like she had
on a specialist that talked to her about why she

(11:44):
smiles when shit's hitting the fan. So, like, say something
really bad to me, like call me out on something
right now.

Speaker 2 (11:51):
You are so boring. I'm so glad you got fired
from Beverly Hills.

Speaker 1 (11:57):
You John Mellan camp cot A all writing dummy, net
O baby baby All right, Yeah it was awesome.

Speaker 2 (12:10):
I love losing paychecks.

Speaker 1 (12:13):
It's so cool. It was great for my self confidence. Okay,
she does that. So she does like a nervous smile
anytime things are excuse, so she brought somebody on to
discuss that. But in this recent podcast, she talks about
how she shared names of those who knew about scan

(12:34):
of All early on. She previously claimed in the lawsuit
that Arianna knew about the fair as early as fall
of twenty twenty two. Arianna was allegedly on the chopping
block and needed a juicy story to save her job.
Tom Shortz knew from the jump, and Kyle Chan had
also known, but he was also one of the people

(12:55):
that was trying to talk some sense into Tom. She continued,
next as Jason Bader, Tom Sandoval's drummer and band manager.
Next is Max Boyans. Max Boyens, you know just spiled
the juice we know about Max Willens. I know Max
now also Max Willians. Why the f are you sharing
your location with so many people? Yeah? I don't understand that.
Am I just too old to understand the sharing location thing?

(13:18):
No like to make my kids and Edwin share their
location with me.

Speaker 2 (13:21):
But like if I was like, Emily, can you start
sharing your location?

Speaker 1 (13:26):
That's weird? Like I don't need to know where you are?
Why does Sheena need to know where all these people are?
Is it an app. I'm really condued.

Speaker 2 (13:35):
The fact that you don't even know what it is
is a little bit frightening to me.

Speaker 1 (13:38):
I have no idea. Is it an app, it's an
it's it's part of the Apple iPhone. You just press
this little thing.

Speaker 2 (13:45):
I'll share my location with you today.

Speaker 1 (13:47):
See see, I'm only going to share it for twelve
hours because I don't want you to get jealous of
the fact that I barely ever leave my house. But
then she said, Rachel then that Sandoval's mother knew she
went on to Sandival's hometown with him. But yes, Tom
Sandoval's mom also knew. And I think that's really messed

(14:08):
up position to put your mom in, because you know
she's keeping this secret for her son. She also says
her therapist told her that accountability for Rachel is protecting herself.
We're going to take a quick break, and then we're
going to come back and talk about episode nine. I

(14:32):
have to start out by talking about this episode by
giving a special shout out to production to the editors
for showing us Spirit Airlines plane as an intro to
every James Kennedy scene. What why is that? Because they're
loving to point out that he lives near the airport.

(14:52):
Oh yeah, I like not the private one. Yeah right,
That's why got your house for that amazing price, because
you have to see every flight leaving Lax. You have
to see every person getting on their Spirit airline realizing
there's not enough room.

Speaker 2 (15:11):
Have you ever flown Spirit? Oh yeah, of course I am.

Speaker 1 (15:15):
I'm cheap. I flew Spirit one time to Nashville and
I thought I was going to die, and I told
Shane never again. I will never fly that airline again.
Well I will if the price is right. But I'm
also a lot shorter than You're okay dying Well no,
I mean I'm okay dying at a budget.

Speaker 4 (15:38):
All right, okay, all right, But James is djaying at
Hotel Ziggy, So Ali invited Joe to come with her
and the rest of the group.

Speaker 1 (15:50):
The last time Ali was at this hotel, she met
Rachel for the first time, and we get a flashback
of this interaction that happened years ago, this and tire
scene with Joe. Come.

Speaker 2 (16:02):
Really, was there more going on that they didn't show
or was it just was she just having a fit
in an anxiety attack because the girls were all standing
together and she wasn't with them.

Speaker 1 (16:17):
Because they really weren't even they hadn't even gotten to
the sloppy Joe comment. At this point. Oh, I was like,
what are they talking about her? Are they?

Speaker 2 (16:24):
I couldn't even hear them saying anything about her, and
I didn't feel like they were.

Speaker 1 (16:28):
Looking back and like pointing at her and laughing. So
I didn't understand the hat, and like the anxiety attack
and the leaving. I think with the hat, I think
she my guess is what Shea was doing by pointing
out the braids is kind of doing that thing where
you pretend that you're looking out for the best for

(16:48):
that other person, like you look so cute with your
hair and the braids, but really she's pointing out I
think you've changed because she got her hair done, because
she did her hair, and she would put makeup on,
and she isn't in the hat like so, But I
guess before we get to that Billy visiting Santaval at

(17:09):
the house he shares with Ariana, admitting she gets nervous
she'll run into Ariana every time she visits, and that
Billy is going to bring her friend Tea to Hotels
Ziggy tonight. Then we luckily get a flashback to the
best pool party ever. I wish they could have done

(17:30):
a flashback to the two girls in the pool with
him too. I mean, I mean, if we're going to
do a flashback, why not show the best scene? Why
not show us what we want to see? The two girls.

Speaker 2 (17:40):
Like, like the most awkward shit.

Speaker 1 (17:44):
But then she's talking, Billy's talking shit about Ariana in
front of Tea. Sandoval wonders if it's worse living with
your mom or ex girlfriend.

Speaker 2 (17:53):
Satava loves the house and he doesn't want to leave.

Speaker 1 (17:55):
He's offered to buy Ariana out of the top market value,
but he hasn't heard anything back from her.

Speaker 2 (18:00):
Well, okay, would you rather live with your mom or
your ex boyfriend that cheated on you? With your best friend?

Speaker 1 (18:09):
Don't call it. I'm going to go with ex boyfriend
who cheated on me was my best friend. I was like,
oh my gosh, I mean, if we're going to talk really,
especially it's the ex boyfriend's scared to speak to me. Yeah,
and he just communicates via assistant or email, and he's

(18:30):
always on the treadmill anyway, so it's not like you're
going to bump into him doing anything right, So I
don't know. I feel like that's a better arrangement. So
then Ariana facetimes with her girl Anne, who's not even
on the clocks. We can just see her in yet
another outfit have been Where is she?

Speaker 2 (18:48):
Where is she at home? In her bathroom, like brushing
her teeth or something.

Speaker 1 (18:51):
I think she's like getting ready for like the Taylor
Swift concert or something like that. It was the tailor.
She's a swiftie. She's a swiftie. She's not on the
and Arianna still asked her if Sandoval stairs. She's like,
I don't know, let me check.

Speaker 2 (19:06):
Let me text him and ask him, and then I
text you back and let you know. She's like, so
I have to leave soon and I don't want to
run into him.

Speaker 1 (19:14):
Oh yeah, sure, hold on, Taylor, can you hold off
this next song? Yes, stay a little break, Taylor intermission.
I need to find out if Tom is going to
walk through his own home. I just have a little
work to do. But arian it feels like she's on
the verge of burnout, like burnout. I'm like, we can

(19:39):
tell by your bedroom money, so she step want to burnout?
Step two? Take out by your bed?

Speaker 2 (19:48):
That you left there overnight.

Speaker 1 (19:50):
Overnight. Girl, I'm like, I realize that we're mad at
Sandoval for letting the dog in your room, but I'm
mad at you for leaving chicken skewers overnight. I don't
care what the situation is or what level of my
mental state is in Like, clearly I'm not in the
best one right now. My feet are a disaster that
looked like they should be kept under a rock.

Speaker 2 (20:12):
But to leave skewers an old chicken by your bed.

Speaker 1 (20:18):
I know, That's all I kept thinking about. I had
a hard time like blaming Sandball when I was like,
that's disgusting.

Speaker 2 (20:25):
You woke up the next morning and you got up
out of bed and you saw it sitting there, and
you brushed your teeth and you put clothes on, and
you still didn't throw that shit away. Are we just
assuming she brushed teeth or did we see this on camera?

Speaker 1 (20:39):
Oh? Well, I just assumed she did. I don't know.

Speaker 2 (20:42):
Maybe she still has chicken satte breath.

Speaker 1 (20:45):
I don't know. But then yeah, But also, why we're
on this topic so we don't have to go to
it next? Why did she say that the dog needed
to go to the vet. Because of the chicken satae.
And then Sandoval had to outer and say she ate
five hundred laxative pills two separate incidents. Yes, but it

(21:11):
wasn't fifty he's like or fifty. No, No, it was
five hundred. Could you imagine how do.

Speaker 2 (21:19):
You survive after you had five?

Speaker 1 (21:21):
First of all, what who has five hundred laxative pills?

Speaker 5 (21:26):
Like?

Speaker 1 (21:26):
What do you made hold on? I don't understand is
that the bulk version from Costco? And who whose laxatives
were they? Were they his laxatives or Ariana's laxatives? And
and I mean Tom Sandval is the one that told
me the best way to cure a hangover is with mine.

Speaker 2 (21:46):
All oh, I thought you were gonna say with laxative
was shifting her.

Speaker 1 (21:51):
Brains out on top of the alcohol diary base. But yeah,
why didn't anybody in the scene even question the laxatives?
Like do you you have tons? Like I think I have,
like up on one top shelf. After like my necklift,
they gave me like coal ace or something, because when
you're on paying pills, they're like, I get it happens
to me every time I keep a little supplied, don't

(22:12):
goal axe whatever, I have surgery, But how many pills
do you have? I think I may have four. It's
just like the regular I don't know CBS little package,
I don't know. I feel like if my dog ate it,
he'd be fine, But like, how did you get into
this packaging? Like that's a hard part. You have to
like push it through the little thing like get a floor.

(22:33):
And the dog was just like what love accidents?

Speaker 2 (22:40):
That and chicken skewer? Yeah, sticks, but yeah.

Speaker 1 (22:44):
Then in her confessional, Ariana admits that Anne deserves so
much better than Sandoval. She doesn't know if she can
even save Anne, but someone needs to hashtags save Anne.

Speaker 2 (22:55):
I'm like, we said that first, Yeah, didn't we?

Speaker 1 (22:58):
I think I think we did. I mean she may
have recorded the confessional before it was aired, but probably
I've done a hashtag. Maybe it was help and but
one would say and saw a lightning bolt of opportunity
and jump to it. Yeah. She was like I would
love to be concerned for this, but also she couldn't

(23:20):
have like done it a little cooler, like you know,
I'd rather work for you. She's like, I know. I
was like, wow, yeah, I can assure you. George, who
just turned down. The air conditioning does not greet me
with that kind of enthusiasm, doesn't. Well, maybe if I
FaceTime George and I'm like, George, I'm looking for an assistant,
and George is like, I would love the opportunity, you'll know,

(23:46):
you'll know. Hey, George, can you let me know if
any of my kids are in the hallway because I'd
like to go downstairs and I don't want to have
to parent.

Speaker 3 (23:58):
George thought I was actually really he's like, look check
Like then Shorts, Oh god, the Shorts and Lalla stuff.
Shorts and Lalla are a creation together. Why are they
always getting smoothies? Like, I've never seen people get more
smoothies and juices in my life. Well, I've never seen
two people flirt more but not flirt.

Speaker 1 (24:21):
But I mean, maybe this was because they're sober curious
or whatever. He's sober curious, pretending he's pretending to be
sober curious. But they do it shot together, and then
Shorts tells her he likes to go on drug and
alcohol benders, but he also likes to go on over ballads.

Speaker 2 (24:42):
It's just all about ballace.

Speaker 1 (24:44):
It's like I'll snort cocaine today tomorrow I'll have a smoothie.
It's all about balance. And then the day after snorting
cocaine where I'm in a depressed state, I will hang
out with Joe, go flirt with Lala.

Speaker 2 (25:01):
And do it's shocked. That's right, balance, healthy balance.

Speaker 1 (25:07):
But then Shortz admits to Lala that he made out
with Sheena in Vegas twelve years ago. Lala is shocked.
Schortz was dating Katie when this happened. Lala's annoyed that
Sheenan never told her this. Considering how close they are,
Katie may not know this happened either. So basically, Shortz
just dug himself into hole for no reason. He must

(25:28):
have just come off a drug bender. That's why he's
admitting to this.

Speaker 6 (25:35):
Maybe I hadn't worn off At this point, He's like, oh,
should I should.

Speaker 1 (25:44):
Hold on? Maybe before I continue the story, let me
do a little juice shot. Yeah, yeah, yeah? Did I
say maybe he'd be able to take it some laxatives?

Speaker 2 (25:55):
He talks that right out of him exactly.

Speaker 1 (25:59):
But I mean, I gotta also say I've been to
that creation and those five juice shots they cost more
than the mortgage on Sandoval and Ariana's home. So they're
just so expensive because you're paying for the packaging. It
was like a big yeah, like what is that called

(26:20):
a needle? Like, oh the syringe? Yes, syringe? Yeah this
oh my god, speaking of drugs. Yes, I love where
this is going. Please continue. But what was like the dating?
Like why does he always flirt with Lalla and then
Lala looks so uncomfortable? Do you think they've maybe made out?
And that's what he didn't share and accidentally said, Shina,

(26:42):
maybe that's I like that plot twist. I just feel
like there's some kind of like is it him trying
to test the waters?

Speaker 2 (26:50):
And then if your Lala, are you like shorts?

Speaker 1 (26:53):
I have a kid, I'm trying to get pregnant with
another of all the people, it's not going to be
with someone who tells me they like to go on drugs, right,
I'm growing. I think he's I think he I think
he's testing the waters with Lala to see if she'll, like,
you know, take the bait. Because he's always talking about

(27:13):
how she's hot and he likes her lips and we're
on a date. It's uncomfortable. It actually makes me uncomfortable.
It was as bad as the Valley scene last week
where Jesse was saying his side piece or his mistress
was like, poor La, poor Laala being the hot one,
Poor Lalla to be that hot burden she must bear.

Speaker 2 (27:45):
Katie visits Lala at her apartment.

Speaker 1 (27:48):
This is where I feel like Schwortz maybe just did
this to get some of the heat off of sand Hall. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (27:56):
Oh, so he's taken one for the team. He's like that,
I'm smart to figure that out. I think he's actually
pretty smart. Really yeah, when he's not on a bender,
when he's not on drugs, he's really indulgent. Now, I
think he is pretty.

Speaker 1 (28:13):
Aware, but he's very aware at playing confused or dumb.
I don't like to use the word dumb, but like
lost naive night, thank you, thank you naive. Okay, but
Katie la Las, you know, feels the need, of course
to go even though she's not. She's just had a

(28:34):
fight with Katie and Sheen is one of her best friends.
Of course she's going to go to Katie for I
would do the same thing. And you know what a
shocking turn of events because not only has Katie always
hated Shena, Katie is pissed. We get a flashback to
twenty thirteen, where Shorts admitted to making out with someone
and claimed it was Sheena's friend. Well, you know, knowing

(28:59):
his history, maybe he was on a bender and he
didn't realize that it was Sina. He thought it was
her friend. Looks like but not the same. But then
Lala says she didn't go to Sheena first because she
didn't want her to have time to turn it into
a pretty picture.

Speaker 2 (29:16):
So it's like, that's your bestie, Yeah, what's a pretty picture?

Speaker 1 (29:22):
Mean? Like she just gets out of it somehow. Yeah,
Like she didn't want to have time to come up
with a story before Katie confronts her. Right, So it's
a strategy strategy she's producing. She's producing the moment. Yes,
she's like few, we're just so happy not to talk
about sandoval Ariana. But I was thinking, what is in

(29:44):
Lalla's Pellegrino, because she is putting it in the work,
like she's like, got this, I'll take another person down
the city, hold my Pellegrino's I'm going in. That should
be like with everybody being sober and sober curious on

(30:05):
this show. That's instead of throwing wine in people's faces
and should be throwing the sparkling water right, Oh my
sparkling water. I'm going in. Sometimes when I'm really in
a mood, I just have a water with some lemon
in it. Yes, that's what I'm feeling. Really fry. Maybe

(30:25):
throw some bitters. Could you imagine them with an emergency?
Oh no, Well they were all doing the most at
Hotel Ziggy Sandovel tells Brock that he wants to talk
to Ariana tonight, but he's scared. I was like, oh

(30:47):
you should be. I was like, is he for real?
Like I hate to be the bare bad news. But Tom,
you do live in the same home with her. You
could have just done this. You have said, Anne, we
want to the three of us want to sit down.
I want to sit down and actually have a conversation
with her. Can you mediate? Yeah? And you mediate? Anne,

(31:09):
this is another job, but I know this probably wasn't
in your original job description. But we'll just amenda here.
Now you're mediating. Well, he's like, you're leaving me anyway
to go work for Arianna. So let's end with a
bang and let's have this awkward conversation together. But then Sheena,
you can tell how much Sheena dislikes Joe because she

(31:32):
starts doing the hair thing and all that. But this
hair thing really sets Joe off. I'm guessing that's what
sets Joe off because she kept telling her to take
her hat off. Is that what it was?

Speaker 2 (31:44):
But also or I mean clearly clearly there's probably some
tension there.

Speaker 1 (31:50):
Well. I remember when I was filming Beverly Hills, there
was one time and it was like the first season
I didn't really have much glam just because really I
didn't have enough money. I didn't I got more money
as the seasons came on, and I didn't like ask
I wanted for money, so I didn't glam as often,
like I would only glamb if it was like full

(32:10):
cast events and I knew whatever. So I remember, like
my second season, one day I had red lipstick on
I can't even picture that I know, and one of
the women was like, Teddy, I mean, the red lipsticks
looks good, but like so not like it just kept
kind of going after like implying that I was trying
to be something that I wasn't. And I remember like

(32:31):
sitting at the dinner and being like, true, listen to me,
I want to put this red lipstick on. So I
feel like that might have been what Joe was going through,
Like they've never seen me make this kind of an effort,
even though the effort was just two braids.

Speaker 2 (32:49):
Yeah, so you're saying it was just a self conscious
kind of thing where she was very she was just
feeling not herself.

Speaker 1 (32:56):
Yeah, she didn't. She didn't. I don't know what herself is.
It's a little But then the entire group was talking
about how they don't like her because Joe and Shorts
would go on double dates with Rachel and Sandoval while
they were still a secret. Oh, I don't know how

(33:17):
I feel about that.

Speaker 2 (33:19):
I don't either.

Speaker 1 (33:19):
I mean, I also want to understand because you can
tell how much Katie does. We're going to have Katie
on the pod, I think in a couple of weeks,
so we can ask her. But Katie recently said on
Vile Files that the group met Joe through Kristen. Joe
would reach out to Katie and try to schedule a
haircut for Shorts because she didn't want to d him
directly to step on Katie's toes. Then she sleeps with

(33:43):
him when they're divorced. Haircuts, stepping on toes sleeping together.

Speaker 2 (33:50):
That's fine hair game.

Speaker 5 (33:54):
But I I am do you think she always had
a crush on Shore and or do you think it
was just once Katie was an asshole to her, she
was like, this is fair game and I am now interested?

Speaker 2 (34:07):
And was she cutting Shorts's hair? I mean, I think
she probably always had a crush on him, That's what
I would go with. But she always had a crush
on him? And then and then yeah, now she feels
like she can in aice fair game, right Yeah?

Speaker 1 (34:21):
And then in her confessional, Joe says the girls bully her.
Katie wrote on Instagram, Joe is spooky. Her energy is
on par with a crackhead. She is psycho. And I
will also light her on fire with Rachel. I mean
light on fires a little bit. Is that? What does
that mean I will light her on fire with Rachel?

(34:42):
Is that because she was doing the double dates? Is
that like, yeah, she will light them both that, like
light their asses on fire, like they're I think it's
like being dead to me.

Speaker 2 (34:50):
Okay, But my question is does Joe owe a duty
or a responsibility to Ariana to tell her what Tom
Sandoval is doing?

Speaker 1 (35:00):
Well, at first, I would say no. But then I
didn't realize this part, but Arianna said in either the
after show or one of the things that I watched,
she says, listen for everybody feeling bad for Joe, that
like we are, you know.

Speaker 2 (35:15):
That we're just coming for her.

Speaker 1 (35:17):
She spent Thanksgiving with us, She did these things with us,
so I guess she was hanging out with Arianna as well.
Let's plan a Thanksgiving and let's invite anybody that would
want to have sex with our husbands all do it together.
I don't know who would be on my list. Yeah,
I mean it's we're gonna have to come up with

(35:38):
a list. That's that's for next we have some time.
Anyone out there would like to have sex with Shane?
Can you please DM me so that I can start
creating my Thanksgiving list? Actually, can you please DM me?
Because we don't want to step on any toes, right
and they want Shane goes to look at my Instagram,
so please, do I please DM Teddy? But then yeah,

(36:03):
then we see she in a piss that Joe's wearing
a hat. Joe in the corner plugging her ears. Okay,
the plugging her ears? Can we just go to that, like,
I don't understand that you're an adult woman. If you
were at an event like that and there were some
women over at a table making you uncomfortable, would you
plug your ear? I mean that would that be your

(36:27):
go to? Is she trying to be funny or is
she so socially awkward? Like maybe we're missing part of
this socially awkward? I would go with that, Okay, yeah,
But then Joe leaves the party sobbing, which I also
didn't get, like either, if you're going to come and
you're gonna film and you're going to do this, get

(36:48):
in the mix again. There's a cry here and there.
I've cried. You've cried. I think.

Speaker 2 (36:53):
I don't know that your cried. I've cried, but you
have you have tear ducks.

Speaker 1 (36:59):
I do. I do, actually, thank you, thank you for
that question, you know, just checking. But then I can't
I can't decide what's worse having to interact with Joe
on that chair for an hour while she's doing such things, or.

Speaker 2 (37:22):
Being her braids that got so dismissed this entire.

Speaker 1 (37:26):
They're like, what about us, hold on, We've put in
all this, We look we look so pretty. Nobody can
see us. We were so much better than that Brett confessional.
I like how in the confessional she's like, I'm not
gonna sit in the chair normally I'm gonna sit I'm

(37:48):
gonna cross my legs. Then then we get to the
next awkward interaction, which is stand of all approaching Lalla.
This is my favorite interaction in history of anything I've
ever watched. I wish we were there. I mean, because
he's like kind of preps himself. He's like he's gonna

(38:12):
like he's gotta go, like get on the TA for
a minute. First he's like.

Speaker 7 (38:21):
All, I'm going in, and he says.

Speaker 1 (38:31):
Lala makes a comment first that she knows that Ariana
can afford to buy an apartment at this point, so
it's weird to be living with Sandoval. They don't.

Speaker 2 (38:39):
Essentially the conversation goes nowhere.

Speaker 1 (38:41):
Yes, I don't know what they're talking about. Like he's like, hey, yeah,
send you an email. I like how he comes in
from the side, he's like and he bends down.

Speaker 2 (38:50):
He's like hello, and she's like this, I'm sorry, are
you talking to me me?

Speaker 1 (38:59):
You can reach out with me, you can reach out
to me through your new assistant, Anne, I'm sorry, oh
me with the mortgage payments? Do me? You can talk
to my lawyer. So at some point during this Hotel
Ziggie where like James Kennedy is getting like his DJ

(39:21):
pictures taken by his girlfriend. By his girlfriend, yeah, not
a photographer, not the paparazzi. Joe's left. At some point,
Katie pulls Sheena aside about the short situation. Sena claims
it wasn't a makeout. She said, Shorts tried to kiss her,
but it was nothing more than that. Sheena never told

(39:42):
I love that part. I understand he tried to kiss her,
she pulled away. It wasn't a big deal. But then
she said, I never told you because I was scared
of you and I wanted to pretend it never happened.
But I also wanted to be a part of your
big day.

Speaker 8 (39:55):
Yeah no, don't say the last part.

Speaker 1 (40:00):
Say the last part.

Speaker 2 (40:02):
I just really wanted to be in your wedding, So
I wasn't going to tell you that your future husband
tried to make out with me. I get it, you
know what, Dave's valid, you know what, She's right. I'm
pretty sure if that happened, you know, she probably wouldn't
have been a bridesmaid.

Speaker 1 (40:22):
Probably not. Okay, The question is, what do you think
was it a full makeout session or did he just
try to kiss her and she was like, oh, get away?

Speaker 2 (40:32):
Like those are two completely different stories. Well, it depends
did the lips touch, because let's be clear, you know
when someone's coming in for a kiss, like, did she
pull away immediately or was there like a second of
tongue action and then oh no, we can't do this.

Speaker 1 (40:47):
See, these are the questions I would ask. These are
the questions I need to know, because if it was
a pull away prior to the kiss, no need to
mention he's drunk, he's on a bender, whatever it may
be that he calls what he's doing. But if they
actually touched lips and there was some tonguing and then
she freaked that, I think you have to tell absolutely,

(41:09):
but we don't know. We should get Sheena on and
actually get more of those details. But why Also, this
leads me to believe that Katie already knew this because
Katie didn't seem that pissed. Yeah, I didn't think she
was that pissed either, So I don't know though, if
you were divorced, would you be pissed? Like, if you
weren't interested in that person anymore and you divorced them

(41:32):
and you moved on, would you be pissed? I mean,
I think any opportunity Katie has a chance to be
pissed at Short Sashena, she's going to take it. Yeah, definitely.
But I mean, yeah, I think if I had somebody
in my wedding and they didn't tell me that my
husband tried to make out with them, I'd be a
little pissed, even if the time had passed. Yeah, So

(41:54):
never have seen those two seem like friends, right, so
I probably wouldn't have had that person my wedding anyway.
Good point, then, Laala, James, and Shorts all get lunch together.
Shorts claims Joe had an anxiety attack at Hotel Ziggy.

(42:18):
Shorts compares his hangout sessions with Joe to what he
has with Laala, except he and Lala haven't had sex yet.
I see, he says. La Lalla tells Shorts she'd break
his dick in half? Is that a good thing or
a bad thing? That's what I was wondering, Like, you're
so wild and be you may break it in half,

(42:40):
or like you don't know what you're doing and it
breaks it like oops, or like it's you're gonna swallow it.
It's like the Venus fly trap, but like goes anywhere sidon. Yeah,
I don't know. I don't know. But another awkward sexual
exchange would also if I was Laala on that moment,
I'd be like, please don't compare me to Joe. I know,
I did not saying that either. I was like, so

(43:01):
Joe and Lala are the same. Clearly he's on a
bender if he thinks that, I mean, the similarities are
Just listen. I don't want to anyone taking claim on
reminding them of Joe other than me. Guys stand by that.

Speaker 2 (43:21):
I just feel so teddies.

Speaker 1 (43:23):
Don't take it away from her.

Speaker 2 (43:24):
Don't listen, give me that okay, shorts. But then Sandoval
shows up to lunch.

Speaker 1 (43:30):
He looks kind of happy. I was like, whoa. Then
Laala tells them about the water tasting event she's having
that's around Ranger riveting. I mean, I was like water tasting,
say that barklets are heavy on I don't know, let's
have a palette for water. But then in return Santaval

(43:57):
invites Lala to a guided breathwork se which I know
I'm skipping ahead. I never need to see that again.
I don't neither. That was the most bizarre thing I've
ever seen. If I wanted to see sand of all climax,
I would have had sex with them already. I feel
like the neighbors probably called the police. You have a

(44:20):
chin like that level of breath work, like, I just
want you to Can you try it for a second.
Can you see if you can like make that kind
of noise it was? He was just yeah, I don't know.
He was yelling, car, how was that breath work? It was?

(44:46):
I mean, walking into that, I feel like Lala wanted
to take those five hundred laxatives and get her something
out of there. I'm surprised shouldn't walk in, and that
just hurt her out to walk back out. And also
she came over just to witness him doing it. I
thought they were then going to have her laid down
and do her own breathwork, but no, she just had
to come watch him climax and then go, I guess

(45:09):
weird fetish, very bizarre. I want you to come over
and listen to me. How eternal come.

Speaker 2 (45:19):
I'm surprised he didn't get like a noise ordinance violation.

Speaker 1 (45:23):
It was it was really, I mean, Tom doing breath
work is now my sleep? Is it sleep?

Speaker 8 (45:31):
Parlus hilaire, perilous peril, perilous, parallel, perilous.

Speaker 1 (45:44):
Paralys paralys is Deamon for the love? Yeah whatever, it
was an emotional orgasm for him, apparently.

Speaker 2 (45:55):
Then we go back to something about her.

Speaker 1 (45:58):
The whole group show up to take part in sandwich
tasting from the new menu, and it's like crowdhog day apparently,
like I am confused why they like when they did
the flashbacks and showed that they'd eaten each one of
these sandwiches already already. Stop. But this James had some

(46:19):
funny points, like his confessional when he like said, you know,
I really had high hopes for these girls. But then
it was the tweedlede and t it's like tweedled the
and tweedled dumb dicks or whatever you call the balms,
and how long it's taking, and then La La saying
let's fast forward to the good part, and that's where
James says, we all know Tom likes a sloppy Joe.

Speaker 2 (46:39):
That was funny. I didn't get it at first. I
actually envisioned like a sloppy Joe, like a literal sloppy Joe,
and then I realized he was talking about Joe. It
took me a minute, all right, Emily, I was like, hey,
please sloppy Joe too.

Speaker 1 (46:58):
I was like, I haven't had one of the is
it a long time? This is making me want to
zip by dairy queen. I'm hungry. But then they decide, well,
going back to the vile files, like, seriously, we may
as well be doing ads for Nick but on something.

(47:18):
When he brought up something about her, she says she's
given all the updates, but people don't care to listen
because it's boring. Staff Well, I'm happy to listen. I'm
ready for all the information. It's not another way of
saying we don't know what's going on. Yeah, like we
know the permit story, but there is a rumor now
that it's going to be a ghost kitchen on uber eats,
and if that's the case, that will bring in a

(47:41):
lot of money. I think I don't know what that means.
You order a sloppy Joe and it comes from there, Yes,
it means like you're there's no storefront. You're not going
to be able to go into a store, but you
can type in something about her on Uber Eats and
order the sandwiches. But why is it called a ghost
kitchen because there's no you can't go inside like they

(48:03):
I guess they could be making it from their own kitchens,
from from Ariana's bedroom next to the chicken. Yes, with
the laxatives.

Speaker 2 (48:13):
Don't kiss her off. You get a laxative in your sandwich.

Speaker 1 (48:17):
Well, the way Lisa vander Pump was trying to force
herself to eat one of the sandwiches looked like there
was laxative. She was like, pretend to be excited about
the sandwich, Lisa.

Speaker 2 (48:32):
Yeah, well, yeah, I can't.

Speaker 1 (48:35):
Then the group walks over to sewre Sure and Lalla
tells Ariana about her heart to heart with Sandfall. Also,
why does everyone need to tell Ariana about their heart
to hearts this part? I don't really because producers are like,
make sure you tell about your heart to heart with Sandball.

Speaker 2 (48:56):
Make sure that you tell her that you had a virtual.

Speaker 1 (49:01):
Orgasm with her ax. Arianna explains that she is very
mad at him because she wasn't home at the time,
because she was taking Maya to the emergency vet where
she had to get an endoscopy, and it was Sandoval's fault.
We've already talked about the takeout containers. I think it's

(49:22):
an equal person's fault at this point. Well, yeah, don't
leave takeout out. Even if the door, even if he
didn't lock the dog in, did she have her bedroom
door closed so the dog couldn't get in, Because if
the door was opened, the dog could have gotten the
food anyway without sand of Ball's interaction. So I don't know.
I'm guessing the door was closed. The dog smelled the

(49:43):
old chicken. Saute was kind of kneading at the door,
and Samuel was like, oh, you want to go in
the room, shuts it. The dog goes in, goes to town.
But I also have another question. Is it their dog
or is it Arianna's dog? I do not know the
ownership of the dog, because the thing about that is

(50:04):
she says it's her dog. If it's her dog, I
personally wouldn't trust that my ex cheating boyfriend blah blah
blah to take care of said dog.

Speaker 2 (50:16):
No, or to care or to let the dog in
and out, or to do whatever another reason why she
should have moved out.

Speaker 1 (50:22):
Yeah, just get away from him. Protect the dog, Protect
the dog, protect you, protect that dog. Get away from
the other dog. It is what it is. Then we
get into them being at sir. But before that we
have to see the date with Sandoval and Tea. The bowling.

(50:45):
I can't with the seventies Look the seventies bowling. You
want to know who didn't have a virtual orgasm watching
that scene?

Speaker 3 (50:53):
Me?

Speaker 2 (50:54):
Yeah, you didn't like it. You got into seventies bowling.
Not you're saying doing a dance of why the girl
you're on your first date with me? It's one thing
if like we were to video Shane or Edwin doing that.
We've been with them fifteen years, but like a first date,
could you imagine putting on a full bowling show? I
can't in an outfit now with white now polished with

(51:17):
blue tips. Absolutely not.

Speaker 1 (51:21):
Yeah. Then we see Brock working hard, Brock is or
Brock or Brock.

Speaker 2 (51:27):
I'm like, Brock, are you getting paid?

Speaker 1 (51:29):
Because you hope so? Because you're doing a lot, you're
doing the most. Brock pretty much out that Katie's had sex.
Well says that Max slept over at Katie's and around
that same time that this happens. You see, she and
a loser shit on brush. I think she legitimately wanted

(51:50):
to like yeah, like actually cut him when he did?
Is it because what he said had to do with Katie?
And she is scared of having any conflict with Katie.
She just not want to be involved in that. I
also would be scared to admit that you're checking somebody's
location multiple times, so you have no relationship with crazy. See,

(52:12):
it is crazy. I can't even imagine, like I check
my kids because I want to see like where they
are on the bus on the way home for me
to meet them, like not random human beings, like multiple
times like that. But you could just check Tambra's location

(52:33):
all the time. You would always know where we're filming.

Speaker 6 (52:34):
Yeah, and then I could just show up and be like,
so your that's so crazy. I just brought my own
mic cold on.

Speaker 1 (52:46):
I walk in with this. I like red lipstick. Do
you guys like it? Yeah?

Speaker 2 (52:54):
I'm started her red lipstick this year.

Speaker 1 (52:57):
But was Katie drunk or potentially stone while being asked
this question? Because when they did ask her about Max,
She's like what who? Who? Who?

Speaker 2 (53:12):
I'm like, it was last night.

Speaker 4 (53:14):
Yeah, I'm sorry, did you repeat that?

Speaker 1 (53:19):
Who are you talking about? Ye oh? Max? Yeah, he
just he like came over.

Speaker 2 (53:26):
He just like came over. We had like some cheese.

Speaker 1 (53:30):
He listen. It was just a tip, wasn't a big deal.
But we didn't take out. He just tried to kiss me.
He tried to kiss me. I'd no, no spine but
he So this comes out, but and then Shea says,
you know, it's already yelled, it brought that she was
never going to bring it up. But then shehena needs

(53:52):
to corroborate the story and double down, like ich his
location at one fifteen am, and then I checked it
again at boy am, and then I checked it the
next day and all still at Katie's house. And then
I checked Katie's just to be clear, and Katie was
at her own house, Like I don't know, fifty six

(54:12):
people's location to keep up with is a lot, yes,
with multiple check ins, but skipping I mean to give
you backstory.

Speaker 2 (54:22):
Max was on vander Punk Rules prior.

Speaker 1 (54:25):
He used to hook up with Katie's co host on
her podcast. So is he He's one of Short's best
friend Okay, So he Shorts because they kept saying Schwartz
his best friend, but Tom this is another guy. Yeah,
because well, clearly.

Speaker 2 (54:42):
Who's Tom's best friend? Like for real, Tom's about.

Speaker 1 (54:46):
Tom, like Tom Thomas, Tom, Tom his own Tom. But
Shorts is besties with Max. But Max only made it
one season. But on that one season he was on,
he was hooking up with Katie's co host, So it's
all very messy. They're just a very limited amount of

(55:07):
people in LA apparently to hook up with. Well, I
gotta say, I hope none of them have like herpees
or anything, because if one of them has it, they
all got it.

Speaker 2 (55:15):
Yeah, it's like Glitterate's everywhere. Shit's gonna spread.

Speaker 1 (55:21):
What was your thoughts on when Arianna went up to
tea at the bar. I feel like she's inserting herself
in things that she doesn't need to. I mean, I
thought it was just disrespectful to that poor girl that
went on a date with sand the Ball, Like, clearly
she's going to figure it out on her own. I
like how she asked her her age though, oh you're

(55:42):
twenty five, he's forty one. Yeah, And also she doesn't
live under a fucking rock. She's not the two girls
from the pool party. She knows the backstory, she knows
what she's getting into exactly. She just wants her fifteen
minutes of fame. She just wants to be on camera.
She just wants to be on camera. And Ariana, don't
bullsh me. You didn't need a water that badly that
you needed to walk in front of tee and have

(56:04):
this conversation.

Speaker 2 (56:05):
Excuse me, I need a water.

Speaker 1 (56:06):
Excuse me, I really need a water, Like, yeah, because
you're parched. But yeah, it was. It was a little
bit of a doozy. But what we are seeing once
again is this little bit of a hiccup between Sheena
and Rock. Like ever since he's the opposite of Felicity,

(56:27):
ever since he got a haircut, he started working like
he is.

Speaker 2 (56:33):
Yeah, he's on the clock man, ready to.

Speaker 1 (56:37):
Go, Ready to go. But I can't really allow Katie
to be a villain for getting it in after Schwartz
has cheated on her and treated her like ship for years,
that that is the one thing like Schwortz has been
terrible to her. So if Katie want like he did,
if Shorts didn't stick to the rules beforehand, why does

(57:00):
she need to stick to the rules now and Max
is hot and go for it Katie for Katie. Clearly,
if Tom wanted it to work with you, he would
have tried harder and been nicer.

Speaker 2 (57:10):
Yeah, she deserves it, Let her have it. I just
I just wish she would have been like, yeah, he
came over and this is what happened.

Speaker 1 (57:18):
He came over and it was uh, you know, I
would have been fine with a scoring it was a
seven out of ten or whatever it was. It's going
to happen again. I actually I'm drunk dialing him right now. Yeah,
I wanted more details.

Speaker 2 (57:31):
Yeah, so maybe the pod the pod. Yeah, let's ask
him because I want details of that night because really,
according to Sheena, we only know when you got there,
when you left, but we don't know what happened while
you were there.

Speaker 1 (57:45):
True, it's like a true crime mystery. We need to know,
and we've been let that you haven't given us all
the crumbs.

Speaker 2 (57:51):
Well, thanks for tuning into this episode, you guys, make

Speaker 1 (57:54):
Sure that you tune into our next one, which will
be the Valley Season one episode two recap up