Sheryl Lee Ralph Speaks Beyonce & Jay Z Party, Me Too Movement, Dream Girls, + More!
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Speaker 1 (00:02):
All right, it is way up with Angela yee, I'm here.
Jasmine Brand is here with me, yes, and I'm a
little nervous. Can I say that you can't write to
everybody so you're nervous? All right, Well, schir Lee, Ralph
is here, thank you, and we are going to be
talking about a lot of things. But it's an honor,
you know, to be sitting with a true diva as
(00:23):
you are, divinely inspired, victoriously alive woman. Yes, we have
to make sure we put that out there. Don't worry.
We were going to ask you about that because, like
you said, for some reason, diva gets this bad connotation sometimes,
you know, they always think of somebody that's got bad attitude,
just negativity all around her, and it's just so about
(00:46):
her asks in life and takes no shame in the
fact that, of course I hit her, hit her with
my open hand. You know, Will Smith's got nothing on me.
You know, it's they always think of diva like that.
That's it's not supposed to be there. We love the
timely example you just gave. She's right on point, right well.
(01:07):
And she also did tell us while she was waiting
in the green room she said, she only eats green
eminem so we had to hand pick out. Oh my gosh,
you know she picked that right up out of the book.
I told her, no such thing. Hilarious. I was only
chosen the red ones. Okay, I'm the brown one. Red
is your color. You're also delta? Yes, I am ever delta?
(01:29):
Yes I am. Can you guess what Jasmine is if
by looking at her, well, I see the pink all
of that, So I'm going to think that she's an akaa.
I am a aka. But it has nothing to do
with the pick has nothing but yes, okay. Well, also
it's the fact that you've got the green eyeliner Saint
Patty's Day. I have green on because I didn't want
to get pinched. Oh okay, give me a pass please no.
(01:52):
And I was getting ready to say the green fingernails
about this book, but dive at two point. Oh, this
book is out, and it's amazing. First of all, just
to see your journey from where you started to where
you are now. It feels like show business was something
that was in your blood. Oh. Absolutely. My mother always
(02:14):
told me that when I was born. You know, I
was born at a time when they used to spank children.
You know. They'd hold you upside down and then slap
you on your behind. Now that's real. They would hold
you upside down then slap you on your behind to
clear out your lungs. And the story is that there
was no need to slap me because I was already laughing.
(02:34):
So you came out laughing, that's what she says. And
I came out laughing. But they didn't know that this
was the path you were going to take. I know,
you went to college and you were pre med y
for a hot second, even though you were being an attorney,
and a lot of times we don't want to let
our parents down, absolutely, And I'm an immigrants child, you know.
My mom immigrant from Jamaica, Big up Jamaica. And it
(02:55):
was be a doctor, be a lawyer, and if you
can't do that, then mari juana. You know. So that
was the mantra that you had to, you know, live
up to. Thank god, I did none of those things.
I get to play one now and get paid for it.
Oh my god. All of that has had made my
mother when she was here on earth, very happy. You know.
(03:17):
I think it was about the whole monetary thing of
it could you make a living, did you take care
of yourself? Could you live without having to suffer, you know,
anything close to poverty. So when I was able to
help redo her house in Jamaica, oh yeah, and she
was like, oh, it's great, I love it. But I
also could see you being an attorney. I could see
(03:40):
you being a lawyer. My goodness. You know. I was
doing the speaking engagement book signing in Boston and when
I got on the plane and the gentleman said to me, so,
what's the case of the day. And I said, what
what case? Aren't you a lawyer? And I said, no,
I'm not at all. I can definitely see it. I
feel like you win. Yeah, thank you, you got it.
(04:00):
Thank you. And we didn't even introduce you properly. We didn't.
We forgot to say emmy award winning thank you. Shiry
Lee Ralph from Abbott Elementary. Also, which, by the way,
that show is one of the best shows on television
right no, no no, no, no, no no, no no no no.
Abbot Elementary is the best show on television right now.
And I wouldn't even say it's just here in the
(04:23):
United States. It is around the world. The way people
in different cultures and languages have caught onto this show.
It has been amazing. We have not seen anything like
this in years when it comes to television, and I'm
so happy to be a part of it. And your
role is amazing on there. It's so funny because you're
(04:44):
like the best teacher, but also it's so hard for
you to like on their own up to certain things
that like when you set the fire and in the school,
I owned up to that. I did, Okay, yeah, thank you.
Took a little bit. It took a moment old school too,
thank you. But I love that because we all had
(05:05):
a teacher like that, you know what. Everybody says that,
and I think that's what makes Barbara Howard so loved
by people, as they all think of that teacher that
they had that really poured into them, that teacher that
really believed in in them. You know, she might not
remember you, but you'll never forget her for sure. Yeah,
(05:28):
did you have teachers like that? Oh? My god, My
dad was a lifelong learner and a teacher. My auntie
Carolyn a reluctant teacher turned principle Blue Ribbon School and Washington,
d C. Didn't cut someone come visit her? Oh? My god,
the queen and not Latifa to visit her. The actual
queen came to visit herself. Queen. Well, okay, the other queens,
(05:53):
the other queen. Yeah, there you go. That part. You
know I met the other day, did you? Yeah? I
saw her. It was very now at Variety, you know,
the Variety Fair. Vanity Fair party, not Variety, the Vanity
Fair party. Baby, let me tell you I went to
some party. Yes, you had, and I saw some people.
Everyone wants to beat take pictures with you now, but
(06:15):
it's on a whole nother thing now, way up, way up.
And Sunday night, this Sunday night at the Vanity Fair party,
everybody who was anybody was in the room. But it
was the Gold party. Oh yeah, honey, that's set the
(06:39):
gold standard. Let me tell you. Okay, First of all,
when you walk into this room, if you're there, you
already are a VIP. Okay, nobody's taking selfies with anybody
because nobody needs them with everybody because they're all going
to connect on some way, some level somewhere, or have
(07:00):
already connected already, so they're like fiss bumping, Hey, how
are you doing all of that stuff Kardashians and all
of that stuff all over the place. But when the
Golden Child, the Golden Child, the Golden Child, Miss Beyonce
entered the room, I'm not really you know, taken back
(07:23):
by too many people, right, I'm sure, but Beyonce walked
right up to me with her beautiful open arms and
was so lovely in her welcoming of me to the party.
But it doesn't stop there. Okay. I don't know if
anybody has seen Beyonce lately, okay, but the face on
(07:49):
this woman, oh my god, the woman has a glow.
I don't know if it was the glow of the night.
I don't know. I do not know. But when I
looked at Beyonce, I was like, my god. I had
to tell her. I said, darling, you're just getting better
(08:11):
with time. And I really meant it right because she
really is right. What did she say when you said
she She just was very She just took it in
and she said, you know, thank you, and it was
in a genuine thank you. Then she happened to tell
my son how handsome he was, and he almost died
and went to heaven. I was like, please, honey, stay alive,
(08:33):
stay alive. It was, but it was amazing. And then
you know, jay Z chose me for the NFL lift
every voice and sing. So I said to jay Z
when I met him, And first of all, I have
to tell you he's much better looking in person. Okay,
he's much better looking in person. You'd rather be better
looking in person. By the way, that part right there.
(08:56):
He's much taller than you accept. He has a slim
but fit build on him. So you could see why
she chose j right, you could. You could see that, right,
And I was like, okay, I see it. And I said,
jay Z, why me? Why did you choose me for
that moment? And he looked at me and with this
incredulous look, and he was like, like as if he
(09:18):
would say why you, He was like me, of course
it was you, and you were great. He said that
song will never be the same. And I was like,
oh my god. You know when when your children just
look at you and I loving on you and giving
you your flowers because I'm everybody's mother in my head
(09:38):
and all of my children do well. I was just like,
m look at you, look and look at your scared yes,
oh thank you? Yeah, like you very flawless you. I
like to take care of myself. I can see, thank you.
And my dad said that to me that you know,
a long life, there will be changes, there will be journeys,
but there's one thing you must do for yourself. And
(09:59):
from a man of his time, it was as a woman,
you must take care of yourself. So that has been
a life thing of mine. And I spent most of
my time being raised by my dad. You know, my
parents lived in two different places, and to my mother
took my two younger brothers to Jamaica. My dad kept
(10:19):
the two older ones in the States and we went
back and forth, you know, for the holidays and things
like that. But so I really was raised from a
male point of view as to what is necessary to
keep yourself, you know, in shape, moving forward, fabulous. That
was important to him as his firstborn and only daughter.
And I look at you and I'm like, surelie, First
(10:41):
of all, when you're a beautiful now, when you were younger,
I mean stunning, right, And I think about some of
the experiences that you went through from leaving Diva two
point oh, going to a school that was an all
white school for a period of time, and feeling not beautiful.
What was that experience like? Because I remember going from
books good to private school too, and how high that
(11:02):
was for me. But I can't even imagine what you
went through. When I think about it now, it still hurts.
It was still traumatic in many ways. The things that
people said to you, the things that oh my god,
the way they treated you at times. And this was
not just kids, this was adults as well, and worse
(11:25):
than that. In my mind, these were women of gods.
These were God's handmaidens, the nuns, and the way they
treated me at times, I will never forget one time?
Who mother superior? Okay, I went downstairs. I had piano less,
and I won't tell you at all because you can
read it in DIVA two point zero, available wherever it
(11:47):
is you get your books. I went down from my
piano less and my dad was a very accomplished pianist,
and I hadn't practiced it. I didn't practice. That woman
looked at me and she said, I don't have to
take students like you, and it was the you, and
(12:08):
she took her hand and she slammed the lid of
the piano down. And I don't I don't know what
made me pull my hands back, but that lady was
going to break my fingers. And I went upstairs to
my class which was literally just upstairs. My class was gone, gone.
There was nobody there. I walk over to Mother Superior's office.
(12:30):
I said, Mother Superior, my class is gone. Mother Superior
looks at me and tells me that liars will not
be tolerated here and there will be consequences for my lying.
I walked behind Mother Superior to my classroom and she
(12:51):
looked at me and then opened the door. There was
nobody there. There was nobody there right. Mother Superior told me,
then go home. This is the middle of the day.
But I know they're going to get their blessing. They're
going to get their rosary beads. And I'm an Episcopalian,
and I'm like, okay, we're distant cousin. We're oh no,
(13:13):
we're close cousins. But I want my blessing too. So
I walk to where I know they've gone to get
their blessing, and I can see myself walking around this table,
you know, before I pick out my blessing, my rosary beads.
Then I have to walk home, and it's three miles
and which when you're young can be kind of long, right.
(13:36):
So I walk now by the way and it's now dark.
It's the sixties. Everybody has lost their mind. They think
I've been kidnapped. They don't know what is happened to me.
The school cannot tell them where I am. They know nothing.
And of course back then your parents were confused. You're
loss and then you get beat right. So I was like,
(13:59):
after all, is I got beat again? Okay? My spirit
got was beaten. Then I got beaten. I think this
was fourth grade. Fourth so I'm like eight years old.
I'm young, and I'll never ever forget that. Now, all
of the other things on top of that, whole nother thing,
but that I'll never forget. Icing on the cake was
(14:23):
years later, like years later, I'm gonna say maybe two
three years later, and we'd moved and we came back
and there was mother Saint Peter Maura walking down the street,
the young woman who had slammed the lid of the piano.
She I remember, she had this bright red hair in
these really like green blue eyes. To me, I was,
(14:47):
I was fascinated by all of that, right, And she
looked at me and she apologized to me. Wow, she apologized.
She said, you know, I am so sorry. I did
not know then what I know now, and I apologize
and she came down to my eye level to apologize
to me. So I've had that happened several times in
(15:09):
my life where people have made certain mistakes, but they
have come back to say I'm sorry, which which in
some ways it helps heal the hurt, but not all
the way because it happened. And that is one of
your lessons. Right to not hold on to those that's
right to go, that's right. Do not let other people's
negativity become yours. Do you channel those emotions and that
(15:29):
like that experience you kind of broke down to us,
that paying that hurt and feeling helpless? Do you channel
that kind of stuff in your work all that time?
Those kind of feelings, You know, I think as a
method actor, I remember how I felt at that time.
So when there comes to another challenge like that, when
the character is feeling challenged, I go right back to
(15:52):
how did I feel? Yeah then, and it makes it come,
It makes it rise right away because you remember it
and the feeling is right there. You know. Well, let's
talk about the business side. Of Shirley row Yes, even
putting this book out DIVA two point. Oh, let's talk
about the process of you deciding who is going to
publish this book? You know, for me it was I
(16:15):
have been given an incredible platform. And if I think
the platform is not just for me to stand on,
I think the platform is my ability to say to others,
come on, let's stand up here, let's let's stand up,
let's go away up, let's go away. It's good. You know,
(16:38):
I get it. So I in publishing this book. You know,
I've done it with a big publisher, one of the
Big five. Before you know, you get that first check,
and you usually don't see yeah, that's it, that's it, right,
that's it. What they give you is what they give you.
And this time I said, what if I could work
with an independent publisher. What if I could share whatever
(17:03):
we make with them and we go into it together,
you know. And that's how I chose wordy and it's
word with three e's after it. And I knew Marva
and Marva had created and developed, you know, the Human
bookstore that was up here, you know, there you go,
(17:23):
it was up in Harlem there, and I've known her
I always called her the literary Douyane, you know, And
so I called her up and I said, girlfriend, why
don't we do this? Let's do this, And because I
wanted to be prepared for what I felt was going
to be the success of Abbot Elementary right there. And
(17:45):
I always say this, stay ready so you don't have
to get ready. I was the one that said that
to Monique. Thank you very much clearing that hum, but
stay ready. And so I knew there was a book,
and I said, let's do this book. And she said, great,
let's add pictures people want to see. Yeah, alrighte pictures.
(18:12):
And Marvis said let's add the pictures and I said okay.
And then we you know, we put these life lessons
together and we put the book out and people have
just started to buy the book. Yes, And it was
the right thing to do at that time. And we're
working on a children's book to come up now, that'd
be great. Oh yeah, missus, Howard has to have a
(18:33):
children's book. Yes, sense, you gotta do it in character.
We're gonna have an audio book for this. We're gonna
have another launch date. It'll probably happen in April. Another
launch date that you'll hear about because people are like, look,
miss Ralph with your voice, we need you to read
the book. And I'm like, that's easy, let me read
(18:53):
the book. Yeah. And I know early on when you
talk about dream Girls, because that was the big success
where everybody was coming to you after that you were
the belle of the ball. But also you didn't foresee
what that could have meant for you financially at the time.
So discuss that because that's something in the book that
you talk about. I ery Lee always felt that dream
(19:17):
Girls was going to be a big hit. I always
felt that. But we were young. I mean we were like,
what twenty when we started twenty three and then I
turned twenty four a week after opening night, you know
of the show. So we were young, and when you're
(19:37):
young and you don't know a whole lot back then,
you do crazy things like sell away your rights for
a dollar a dollar. To this day, I haven't gotten
a check from the magnificence that is dream Girls, and
it hurts me to my heart now. The cast of
(19:59):
Chorus they went through the same development process that we did,
the workshopping of the showy they signed the same contract.
They filed a class action suit. Yeah, as they won, right,
but for whatever reason, the cast of dream Girls chose
not to do that. And is it ever too late
(20:23):
to do that. I don't know if it's ever too late.
But sometimes I tell you I look back at it,
and I said, I have regained and captured everything the
devil took from me. Definitely, yes, thank you, But I
also don't see why people don't go for what you
wanted to do them and that and also why on
(20:44):
the other side they don't want to do the right thing.
They made so much money, why not even if it
was just a small, tiny percentage, just that as a
gesture to say, we see you, we appreciate what you contributed.
We know you signed a bad deal that you shouldn't
have signed. Let's make this right. Thank you. And I wish,
and I say to this day, because only one of
(21:05):
them is alive out of that original creative company, I say,
maybe someone will do that. Maybe someone will leave us
something in their will. May be because he was probably
for about the principle at Yeah, it is principle of it.
It's the absolute principle of the whole thing. Well, fortunately,
(21:26):
like you said, you have recaptured everything that you should have.
But I just feel like the right thing. I'm a big,
like the right thing to do type of person. Thank you,
you know that's why you're going way up here we
go exactly now. I also want to discuss other things
about your brand. Right you are fabulous? You are a
(21:47):
diva again? Tell us what diva stands for? The divinely inspired,
victoriously alive, aware, audacious and if it was Sunday, we
would be anointed. Yes, right there you go any day,
right now. And what people also have to understand is
your first role with Sydney Poisier. How do you that's
way up now? I don't even know where you you know,
(22:09):
get to go from there, but that experience had to
have left such a big impact. That had to be
the time when you knew it's way up for real.
I gotta tell you, mister Sydney Poitier was so wonderful
to me. He was like having your uncle in on set,
directing you, being so wonderful to you as his special
niece and guiding you along the way. It was just
(22:32):
an amazing time for me with him. And when I left,
I was given this little black box with had all
the makeup and stuff that I would need to do,
you know, to make me me on any set, because
he knew that there would not be the same sort
of community that we had on that set as I
(22:54):
moved into the industry, and he said to me, I
wish this industry had more to offer you, because you
deserve it. And I look at it now, and when
I say I am what believing looks like? I am
what knowing that you belong here looks like. Because suppose
i'd left, suppose I'd given up on my dreams, suppose
(23:16):
I had stopped believing in myself, I would not be
here in this time, in this space, with a book
to write and stories to tell. And as a spoiler,
she was up against his daughter. Okay, really read the book,
You really read the book? Like, yeah, no, I don't.
Why are we even doing this? Why are we here?
(23:36):
I mean when I walked into that audition, that's exactly
how I felt. I was like, but that's a good lesson,
thank you. Ye Are there any roles that you're surprised
that you got? No? Never, never, there there are roles
that I was surprised that I lost. But the person
who ended up getting it, they were supposed to get it,
(23:57):
and that's the way God planned or Goddess planned it.
And people were surprised at roles that you turned down to.
Like what I mean, I know you said in the book.
You know that there's roles that you're like because of
your own morals and opportunities that you had that you
could have gotten but you said no to. And I
know that's not an always an easy thing to do
as you're thinking about being you know, getting a check
(24:18):
of course, because that is important. It is making a living,
it's a business. Also tell you that my career has
been intentional. I wanted my people, my community, my family,
the kids that I didn't have back then, to be
able to look at my body of work and say
that's our Shareley Ralph, that's my mother. When young people
(24:45):
come up to me and say, miss Ralph, I see you,
I get you, and I thank you for what you did.
That was with intention. It was done for them. What
was the most challenging role that you did take ever?
Would you say that it left you feeling like oooh exhausted?
(25:07):
This was you know, I don't really know, because all
of them and this is what happens for me as
a performer. When it is well written, and when you
know that's your role, they jump up off of that
page and into you. Their voice comes to you, the
way they walk, the way they talk. I mean, look
(25:29):
at me playing Barbara Howard. It is that I'm playing
a very different woman than myself. Yes there's a kernel
of me in her, but she's different. The way she
comports herself, the way she speaks, her voice is deeper,
you know, the way she talks to people, you know,
(25:49):
the way she holds herself, her love of so many pearls.
You know, Oh my goodness. You know when you look
at me as d Mitchell in Molitia, another different woman,
when you look at me as um Nicki's lover in
Ray Donovan Happy Saint Patrick's Day, Um Ray Donovan, that
(26:11):
completely different woman, thank you, thank you. That was a
woman who swung on a pole. You know, that's a
whole different vibe. But all of them came up off
the page and said, you got me and I got you.
You're such a performer. Even when she's telling me stories
like I feel like yeah, because I feel like I
(26:31):
was at the party just but it gives me like
it gives me like, you know, like that Mike Tyson
had his one man you know show where he sat
and he yeah, I definitely couldn't you definitely see yourself
doing something like that just coming you have this book,
like could you can tell a story and you are
a Broadway just would you ever imagine doing something like that?
I was just asked by a producer if I would
(26:54):
consider coming to Broadway to do a one woman show
for a limited run. And my first action was hell, no,
I don't want to work that hard right now. But
the more I think about it, you know, as time
passes and I can you know, fit it into my schedule,
it's seeming more like hell, yeah, yeah, yeah, we've see that.
(27:15):
Because you know, I also feel like, even now, not
enough black people go see Broadway plays, and that's a
dog on shame. Yeah, because so many shows that we
should see. You should see the Michael Jackson just for
that talented young amazing mouth for us. Yeah, you should
see Miles for us. You should go and experience the
harder they come at the public theater to go to that.
(27:38):
Tina Turner, you should Tina Turner. You know, there's so
many things that you we should see. But there seems
to be a problem with the Broadway community in not
knowing how to market to the black community. For whatever reason.
For forty five years that I know about, they have
had a problem reaching out to communities of color. Yeah,
(28:02):
I don't know what to do about that, because I
want to go see for Color Girls on Broadway and
it came and went, Yes it do and I felt
like it wasn't properly marketed. It was not, you know,
but it was amazing. Yeah, it would you see thoughts
of a Colored Man. No, I didn't see that. That
one was another one. We got killed by m covid.
I was a producer on that. And then there was
the Ohio State Murders with Audra McDonald, a wonderful story
(28:26):
that a lot of people missed that should have seen.
I was a producer on that as well. But there's
so much out there. That's something I definitely want to
highlight more. Is going to see going to the theater, Yes,
because it is like the perfect I want to go
see The Black Odyssey on opening night and that's in
a play on Thirteenth Streets. So I went there to
(28:47):
go see that. But I enjoy going to the theater
so much your phone is away, you know, just like
going to the movies. And I think it's just another
level of of like the fact that it's a one
take things. You know, you go out there and cut.
There's no cut. Yeah, there's no Can I try that again? No,
you have to know your lines because everybody else is
(29:08):
depending upon you, and I can't tell, like if somebody
messed up a line, you know, to be able to
keep going so that we don't even know. That's a
whole another type of skill to have. I was doing
a show called Thoroughly Modern Millie on Broadway, and I
had this monologue about my green glass love and this
(29:28):
particular night, My god, what happens? I couldn't remember see
the hat happened? Remember, And I was talking about bottles
of green glass and green this and green. It would
have been perfect forum Saint Patrick's death. But I was
just lost the second time, the first time that happened
(29:50):
to me though, I was doing dream Girls, and um,
I remember it was one night only you won't oh
my love and my devotion, all of that honey. After
that blank blank, and I remember hearing the stage manager
say her MIC's dead. The on stage manager said her
(30:12):
brain is dead, And at that moment I realized it
might be time to take a long vacation and possibly
move on. And that's exactly what I did. Yeah, well,
that was a sign listen to your body. I listened
to all of it. I listened to the vibes. I
listened to the signs, all of that stuff. It's there.
All we have to do sometimes is listen, because you
(30:34):
know it's speaking to us. But sometimes we want to
listen to something else. You have to listen to your gut.
You have to listen to your own self. You have
to accept your own vibrations because they're there for you
to receive an answer. What was your first bag investment?
My first big myself? Yeah, my first big investment was
(30:56):
in myself. I and that investment and in myself has
paid off. It is paid has paid off in the
way I look it is. It is paid off in
the way I've been able to raise my children. It
has paid off in the way I've been able to
stay married to my second husband, Senator Vincent Hughes of Pennsylvania, Philadelphia.
(31:21):
In particular, it has paid off in the ways that
I've been able to build my brand, build my business,
you know, and uh as a Delta you know. You
know when we go to our conventions, your convention, my convention.
You know, everybody has something to sell. And I would
do these T shirts and the T shirts. I mean
there were times when I needed to sell some T
(31:43):
shirts and they got me over so much. We will
buy some apparel. Baby, I'm to this day to a
Delta event without guys. I'm telling because we will buy,
you know, building upon that. You know. Now my kids
(32:03):
have taken it over with their nonprofit Walk Good La
and you know, their merch and things, and my son
put out there, you know, the graphic of me and
this is what believing looks like. People bought the bags,
they bought the sweatshirts, they bought the T shirts, all
of that stuff. You know, it adds up. You know.
I was crazy about red lipstick, you know, and I
(32:25):
did the reds and people bought the lipsticks really good
lipstick too, you know. And I like to give people quality.
But I've learned this one thing. I always felt that
if I could give you the best for the least
amount of money, you would want it. That's not the case.
People like to pay. They want to pay. Yeah, people
think the more expensive it is the better. Yeah, that's it.
(32:46):
So now my days the lower price guilty because sometimes
I'm looking for stuff and I'm like, which my should
I get? I'm like, well this is cost a little more,
it's probably better. See the quality they got me. That's it.
What about being a doubts at and a sority, what
has that done for you? I don't have sisters, and
now I have the thousands of sisters, and it is
(33:10):
wonderful from me, and I'm sure you feel like this
with your soul wars. It is wonderful for me to
walk into a room of women who are one happy
to see you, two welcoming you with open arms, and
three want to tell you what's going on with them
and want to hear what's going on with you. And
(33:31):
that to me is absolutely magic. So I love also
the attention to scholarship, that education is important, the attention
to community, attention to the people in the community, and
now we're having a new shift to an attention towards self,
(33:53):
that your health and well being really matters. I just
love all of that. No, I'm mental health. I got
my green juice right here, Come on now and one
thing I wanted to ask you about in the book,
and you kind of you didn't get into detail about it.
You talk about the Me Too movement and you even
set an experience where a promoter like put his hand
on your leg and that would happen at times, right
(34:17):
and so, and I noticed that you didn't get into
detail about it. But do you feel like that's something
that a has had any effect on your career in
any way at all, and be that you would at
some point get more into detail about because it is,
like you said, with the Me Too movement and that
happening all the time, that's a hard thing for women
to even speak up about. Hans. I didn't say a
(34:39):
whole lot about it. Yeah, yeah, and not like detailing
names or who it is, but just even the effect
that that has on you because horrible, Yeah, because you know,
oh my god, it's like I can think about these
things and I tell you there was one incidence where
I it was like the third time something like this
(35:00):
had happened to me, and I thought to myself, what
did I do to deserve that? I'm I'm, I'm my
skirt is at my knees, I have on a sweater blouse.
What made this man think that he could just come
over and put his hands on my body in front
(35:25):
of He didn't know me, right, he did not know me,
and I was in that. It passed. Years later, I
was in a situation and that man walked through the door.
He sat down at the table across from me. He
did not remember any of this, but I had to
(35:47):
let him know what he did that night. Oh, I
absolutely confronted. He was right there. I had to confront
him about it. Do you want to know what was
the shocking part? Everybody around the table was appalled that
I would stand up for myself. What they were appalled.
(36:08):
They told me that I should be ashamed of myself
and why would I even bring that up? And at
the dinner table. That's crazy, And that's why women find
it difficult to speak. That's why, because you don't get
the support. People don't believe you. They don't understand why
you're bringing it up. They're like, well, why didn't you
say something at the time, Because it's a feeling a
(36:29):
powerlessness that you have at the time, and you're also
shocked and people don't support you. Yeah, I could tell
you of another time This was a famous TV judge,
not Judge Mathis. I love him. He's a great man.
Not him, because I love Judge Mathis too, Judge. No, no no, no,
he's a great man. This was another one. I'm at
(36:50):
a very public place. I have on like you see me.
I was suited, I had my suit on. I was
handling my business for the teleg vision show I was
on at that time. He and I were on the
same network. This man walked in, grabbed me by the
back of my neck, turned me around and rammed his
(37:12):
nasty tongue down my throne, and everybody at the network
saw it, and the uh. The mayor of New Orleans
at the time was um with my blanket on. His name,
Mark Morial. I called Mark Morial, Mark Moreal. He said,
(37:34):
you want me to send the police there right now,
because we will fix his you know what, right now?
Somebody at the network tapped me on the show that
they said please don't do you know that They did
not want any bad press. Yeah, I can believe around
their show and did not care what had just happened
(37:58):
to me. It wasn't so bad, was it. That's the
kind of stuff that happens. Yeah, that's what happens. That's
what makes it hard for women to speak up about
these And I'm glad you said that because I hear
that all the time. When women come forward, people are like, well,
why is she telling this story now? Thank you? Well,
why didn't she say something when it happened? Thank you?
(38:19):
And that's why I don't get the support. Thank you?
And even and if they see it, they saw what happened.
It's not that bad, is it. Please don't say anything.
We don't need the bad press. It's a brand new show.
Yours is a new show. I was like, Lord, have mercy.
They don't think, well, this is gonna hit the fan
because he's gonna do this to somebody else, because we're
(38:40):
protecting this. Yeah, and even you questioning what you were wearing,
like what did I do to make this happen? Because
people think that too, well, what did you have on? Well?
Why did you bring that to his room? Well? He
told me we wanted to look at the script, you know,
and people act like it's your fault. You shouldn't have
been in that position, or you shouldn't have been wearing this.
So I just when I was reading that, I was like,
I can't even imagine the things that you've been through
(39:01):
being in this business as long as you have, you know,
And I might not have heard it publicly, but I
just think it's important because there's so many women that
might feel like they got some power from here, and
you talk about it too. Well. I'm going to tell
you something. You know, if a man invites you up
to his room and it's the middle of the night,
don't go right to have him meet you down in
(39:22):
the lobby, right although I will tell you that one
time Michael Jordan invited me up to his room. What
time it was, in the middle of the night. I
did go, and you know what we did. We ended
up playing backgammon. We talked about our parents, we talked
about our families, and we ended up being good friends
(39:43):
for a long time. We had no sex whatsoever. In fact,
he referred to me as the big sister, and I said,
I'm always the big sister, you know, And we just
had the best time ever. Yeah, there's good people and
bad people, Yes there are. What kind of advice do
you have for someone who woul who works in Hollywood
is a woman and went through an experience like you
(40:03):
went through like what advice would you give them? Speak
up or no or it's hard. I would say nowadays,
speak up, tell your truth. Do not carry the burden
of that pain, and especially if it's something you feel
that you cannot work through, because you know, situations like
this experience is like this drive some people crazy. Yeah,
(40:25):
it hurts them to their core. They get changed forever.
You know, some people never work again, and they never
work again in this business. You know, I am shocked
that we're seeing what happened with the whole Harvey Weinstein
of it all. I'm shocked that they were actually able
to take him down. You know, there's some other men
(40:46):
that can yell out live, just grab them by the
you know what, and they become president. They become exactly Yeah.
You know, so you just never know. And people do lie,
They straight up lie, and people do believe their lies.
And you can very you can get very deeply hurt.
(41:07):
But try to protect yourself, you know, try to protect
your spirit as much as you can, and try you know,
there's a thing called discernment. Try to you know, we
say feel the room, feel the experience, feel the person's vibe.
Because people can't help but show you who they are,
you know, so protect yourself. Don't go anywhere you think
(41:29):
there might be trouble, Just don't do it. Listen to
the signs well, listen Sharer or Lee Ralph, We thank
you so much for coming through. We did like this
when a whole nother I feel like we could talk
to you for maybe like four or five hours. I'm
not even gonna lie just about everything because there's so
many gems in this bug Diva two point or twelve
life lessons from me for you, and I have to
(41:50):
say it did touch me. I learned a lot more
about you than I ever knew before just your whole
career path. We've always seen how talented and amazing you are,
so this just took it to another level for me.
And want to encourage other writers, you know, if you
really writers and celebrities, if you really really want to
get into publishing your book. Not everybody's a great self publisher.
(42:11):
You can find independent publishers like Wordy, Marva Allen and
I'm working on getting my own imprint. Yes, we want
to see your books and we want to help you
make your money. You don't have to wait on somebody else.
You don't have to wait on the Big five. If
it's your time, let's see what you've got. Let's read
your book. Let's help you get on the journey of
(42:35):
empowering yourself to make your own money. Yeah, get a
better deal. This way to a better deal. Better, we
all make money together. Thank you so much, Sharylie, Ralph
All right, it is way up with Angela yee, I'm here.
Jasmine Brand is here with me, yes, and I'm a
little nervous. Can I say that you can't write to
everybody so you're nervous? All right, Well, schir Lee, Ralph
is here, thank you, and we are going to be
talking about a lot of things. But it's an honor,
you know, to be sitting with a true diva as
(00:23):
you are, divinely inspired, victoriously alive woman. Yes, we have
to make sure we put that out there. Don't worry.
We were going to ask you about that because, like
you said, for some reason, diva gets this bad connotation sometimes,
you know, they always think of somebody that's got bad attitude,
just negativity all around her, and it's just so about
(00:46):
her asks in life and takes no shame in the
fact that, of course I hit her, hit her with
my open hand. You know, Will Smith's got nothing on me.
You know, it's they always think of diva like that.
That's it's not supposed to be there. We love the
timely example you just gave. She's right on point, right well.
(01:07):
And she also did tell us while she was waiting
in the green room she said, she only eats green
eminem so we had to hand pick out. Oh my gosh,
you know she picked that right up out of the book.
I told her, no such thing. Hilarious. I was only
chosen the red ones. Okay, I'm the brown one. Red
is your color. You're also delta? Yes, I am ever delta?
(01:29):
Yes I am. Can you guess what Jasmine is if
by looking at her, well, I see the pink all
of that, So I'm going to think that she's an akaa.
I am a aka. But it has nothing to do
with the pick has nothing but yes, okay. Well, also
it's the fact that you've got the green eyeliner Saint
Patty's Day. I have green on because I didn't want
to get pinched. Oh okay, give me a pass please no.
(01:52):
And I was getting ready to say the green fingernails
about this book, but dive at two point. Oh, this
book is out, and it's amazing. First of all, just
to see your journey from where you started to where
you are now. It feels like show business was something
that was in your blood. Oh. Absolutely. My mother always
(02:14):
told me that when I was born. You know, I
was born at a time when they used to spank children.
You know. They'd hold you upside down and then slap
you on your behind. Now that's real. They would hold
you upside down then slap you on your behind to
clear out your lungs. And the story is that there
was no need to slap me because I was already laughing.
(02:34):
So you came out laughing, that's what she says. And
I came out laughing. But they didn't know that this
was the path you were going to take. I know,
you went to college and you were pre med y
for a hot second, even though you were being an attorney,
and a lot of times we don't want to let
our parents down, absolutely, And I'm an immigrants child, you know.
My mom immigrant from Jamaica, Big up Jamaica. And it
(02:55):
was be a doctor, be a lawyer, and if you
can't do that, then mari juana. You know. So that
was the mantra that you had to, you know, live
up to. Thank god, I did none of those things.
I get to play one now and get paid for it.
Oh my god. All of that has had made my
mother when she was here on earth, very happy. You know.
(03:17):
I think it was about the whole monetary thing of
it could you make a living, did you take care
of yourself? Could you live without having to suffer, you know,
anything close to poverty. So when I was able to
help redo her house in Jamaica, oh yeah, and she
was like, oh, it's great, I love it. But I
also could see you being an attorney. I could see
(03:40):
you being a lawyer. My goodness. You know. I was
doing the speaking engagement book signing in Boston and when
I got on the plane and the gentleman said to me, so,
what's the case of the day. And I said, what
what case? Aren't you a lawyer? And I said, no,
I'm not at all. I can definitely see it. I
feel like you win. Yeah, thank you, you got it.
(04:00):
Thank you. And we didn't even introduce you properly. We didn't.
We forgot to say emmy award winning thank you. Shiry
Lee Ralph from Abbott Elementary. Also, which, by the way,
that show is one of the best shows on television
right no, no no, no, no, no no, no no no no.
Abbot Elementary is the best show on television right now.
And I wouldn't even say it's just here in the
(04:23):
United States. It is around the world. The way people
in different cultures and languages have caught onto this show.
It has been amazing. We have not seen anything like
this in years when it comes to television, and I'm
so happy to be a part of it. And your
role is amazing on there. It's so funny because you're
(04:44):
like the best teacher, but also it's so hard for
you to like on their own up to certain things
that like when you set the fire and in the school,
I owned up to that. I did, Okay, yeah, thank you.
Took a little bit. It took a moment old school too,
thank you. But I love that because we all had
(05:05):
a teacher like that, you know what. Everybody says that,
and I think that's what makes Barbara Howard so loved
by people, as they all think of that teacher that
they had that really poured into them, that teacher that
really believed in in them. You know, she might not
remember you, but you'll never forget her for sure. Yeah,
(05:28):
did you have teachers like that? Oh? My god, My
dad was a lifelong learner and a teacher. My auntie
Carolyn a reluctant teacher turned principle Blue Ribbon School and Washington,
d C. Didn't cut someone come visit her? Oh? My god,
the queen and not Latifa to visit her. The actual
queen came to visit herself. Queen. Well, okay, the other queens,
(05:53):
the other queen. Yeah, there you go. That part. You
know I met the other day, did you? Yeah? I
saw her. It was very now at Variety, you know,
the Variety Fair. Vanity Fair party, not Variety, the Vanity
Fair party. Baby, let me tell you I went to
some party. Yes, you had, and I saw some people.
Everyone wants to beat take pictures with you now, but
(06:15):
it's on a whole nother thing now, way up, way up.
And Sunday night, this Sunday night at the Vanity Fair party,
everybody who was anybody was in the room. But it
was the Gold party. Oh yeah, honey, that's set the
(06:39):
gold standard. Let me tell you. Okay, First of all,
when you walk into this room, if you're there, you
already are a VIP. Okay, nobody's taking selfies with anybody
because nobody needs them with everybody because they're all going
to connect on some way, some level somewhere, or have
(07:00):
already connected already, so they're like fiss bumping, Hey, how
are you doing all of that stuff Kardashians and all
of that stuff all over the place. But when the
Golden Child, the Golden Child, the Golden Child, Miss Beyonce
entered the room, I'm not really you know, taken back
(07:23):
by too many people, right, I'm sure, but Beyonce walked
right up to me with her beautiful open arms and
was so lovely in her welcoming of me to the party.
But it doesn't stop there. Okay. I don't know if
anybody has seen Beyonce lately, okay, but the face on
(07:49):
this woman, oh my god, the woman has a glow.
I don't know if it was the glow of the night.
I don't know. I do not know. But when I
looked at Beyonce, I was like, my god. I had
to tell her. I said, darling, you're just getting better
(08:11):
with time. And I really meant it right because she
really is right. What did she say when you said
she She just was very She just took it in
and she said, you know, thank you, and it was
in a genuine thank you. Then she happened to tell
my son how handsome he was, and he almost died
and went to heaven. I was like, please, honey, stay alive,
(08:33):
stay alive. It was, but it was amazing. And then
you know, jay Z chose me for the NFL lift
every voice and sing. So I said to jay Z
when I met him, And first of all, I have
to tell you he's much better looking in person. Okay,
he's much better looking in person. You'd rather be better
looking in person. By the way, that part right there.
(08:56):
He's much taller than you accept. He has a slim
but fit build on him. So you could see why
she chose j right, you could. You could see that, right,
And I was like, okay, I see it. And I said,
jay Z, why me? Why did you choose me for
that moment? And he looked at me and with this
incredulous look, and he was like, like as if he
(09:18):
would say why you, He was like me, of course
it was you, and you were great. He said that
song will never be the same. And I was like,
oh my god. You know when when your children just
look at you and I loving on you and giving
you your flowers because I'm everybody's mother in my head
(09:38):
and all of my children do well. I was just like,
m look at you, look and look at your scared yes,
oh thank you? Yeah, like you very flawless you. I
like to take care of myself. I can see, thank you.
And my dad said that to me that you know,
a long life, there will be changes, there will be journeys,
but there's one thing you must do for yourself. And
(09:59):
from a man of his time, it was as a woman,
you must take care of yourself. So that has been
a life thing of mine. And I spent most of
my time being raised by my dad. You know, my
parents lived in two different places, and to my mother
took my two younger brothers to Jamaica. My dad kept
(10:19):
the two older ones in the States and we went
back and forth, you know, for the holidays and things
like that. But so I really was raised from a
male point of view as to what is necessary to
keep yourself, you know, in shape, moving forward, fabulous. That
was important to him as his firstborn and only daughter.
And I look at you and I'm like, surelie, First
(10:41):
of all, when you're a beautiful now, when you were younger,
I mean stunning, right, And I think about some of
the experiences that you went through from leaving Diva two
point oh, going to a school that was an all
white school for a period of time, and feeling not beautiful.
What was that experience like? Because I remember going from
books good to private school too, and how high that
(11:02):
was for me. But I can't even imagine what you
went through. When I think about it now, it still hurts.
It was still traumatic in many ways. The things that
people said to you, the things that oh my god,
the way they treated you at times. And this was
not just kids, this was adults as well, and worse
(11:25):
than that. In my mind, these were women of gods.
These were God's handmaidens, the nuns, and the way they
treated me at times, I will never forget one time?
Who mother superior? Okay, I went downstairs. I had piano less,
and I won't tell you at all because you can
read it in DIVA two point zero, available wherever it
(11:47):
is you get your books. I went down from my
piano less and my dad was a very accomplished pianist,
and I hadn't practiced it. I didn't practice. That woman
looked at me and she said, I don't have to
take students like you, and it was the you, and
(12:08):
she took her hand and she slammed the lid of
the piano down. And I don't I don't know what
made me pull my hands back, but that lady was
going to break my fingers. And I went upstairs to
my class which was literally just upstairs. My class was gone, gone.
There was nobody there. I walk over to Mother Superior's office.
(12:30):
I said, Mother Superior, my class is gone. Mother Superior
looks at me and tells me that liars will not
be tolerated here and there will be consequences for my lying.
I walked behind Mother Superior to my classroom and she
(12:51):
looked at me and then opened the door. There was
nobody there. There was nobody there right. Mother Superior told me,
then go home. This is the middle of the day.
But I know they're going to get their blessing. They're
going to get their rosary beads. And I'm an Episcopalian,
and I'm like, okay, we're distant cousin. We're oh no,
(13:13):
we're close cousins. But I want my blessing too. So
I walk to where I know they've gone to get
their blessing, and I can see myself walking around this table,
you know, before I pick out my blessing, my rosary beads.
Then I have to walk home, and it's three miles
and which when you're young can be kind of long, right.
(13:36):
So I walk now by the way and it's now dark.
It's the sixties. Everybody has lost their mind. They think
I've been kidnapped. They don't know what is happened to me.
The school cannot tell them where I am. They know nothing.
And of course back then your parents were confused. You're
loss and then you get beat right. So I was like,
(13:59):
after all, is I got beat again? Okay? My spirit
got was beaten. Then I got beaten. I think this
was fourth grade. Fourth so I'm like eight years old.
I'm young, and I'll never ever forget that. Now, all
of the other things on top of that, whole nother thing,
but that I'll never forget. Icing on the cake was
(14:23):
years later, like years later, I'm gonna say maybe two
three years later, and we'd moved and we came back
and there was mother Saint Peter Maura walking down the street,
the young woman who had slammed the lid of the piano.
She I remember, she had this bright red hair in
these really like green blue eyes. To me, I was,
(14:47):
I was fascinated by all of that, right, And she
looked at me and she apologized to me. Wow, she apologized.
She said, you know, I am so sorry. I did
not know then what I know now, and I apologize
and she came down to my eye level to apologize
to me. So I've had that happened several times in
(15:09):
my life where people have made certain mistakes, but they
have come back to say I'm sorry, which which in
some ways it helps heal the hurt, but not all
the way because it happened. And that is one of
your lessons. Right to not hold on to those that's
right to go, that's right. Do not let other people's
negativity become yours. Do you channel those emotions and that
(15:29):
like that experience you kind of broke down to us,
that paying that hurt and feeling helpless? Do you channel
that kind of stuff in your work all that time?
Those kind of feelings, You know, I think as a
method actor, I remember how I felt at that time.
So when there comes to another challenge like that, when
the character is feeling challenged, I go right back to
(15:52):
how did I feel? Yeah then, and it makes it come,
It makes it rise right away because you remember it
and the feeling is right there. You know. Well, let's
talk about the business side. Of Shirley row Yes, even
putting this book out DIVA two point. Oh, let's talk
about the process of you deciding who is going to
publish this book? You know, for me it was I
(16:15):
have been given an incredible platform. And if I think
the platform is not just for me to stand on,
I think the platform is my ability to say to others,
come on, let's stand up here, let's let's stand up,
let's go away up, let's go away. It's good. You know,
(16:38):
I get it. So I in publishing this book. You know,
I've done it with a big publisher, one of the
Big five. Before you know, you get that first check,
and you usually don't see yeah, that's it, that's it, right,
that's it. What they give you is what they give you.
And this time I said, what if I could work
with an independent publisher. What if I could share whatever
(17:03):
we make with them and we go into it together,
you know. And that's how I chose wordy and it's
word with three e's after it. And I knew Marva
and Marva had created and developed, you know, the Human
bookstore that was up here, you know, there you go,
(17:23):
it was up in Harlem there, and I've known her
I always called her the literary Douyane, you know, And
so I called her up and I said, girlfriend, why
don't we do this? Let's do this, And because I
wanted to be prepared for what I felt was going
to be the success of Abbot Elementary right there. And
(17:45):
I always say this, stay ready so you don't have
to get ready. I was the one that said that
to Monique. Thank you very much clearing that hum, but
stay ready. And so I knew there was a book,
and I said, let's do this book. And she said, great,
let's add pictures people want to see. Yeah, alrighte pictures.
(18:12):
And Marvis said let's add the pictures and I said okay.
And then we you know, we put these life lessons
together and we put the book out and people have
just started to buy the book. Yes, And it was
the right thing to do at that time. And we're
working on a children's book to come up now, that'd
be great. Oh yeah, missus, Howard has to have a
(18:33):
children's book. Yes, sense, you gotta do it in character.
We're gonna have an audio book for this. We're gonna
have another launch date. It'll probably happen in April. Another
launch date that you'll hear about because people are like, look,
miss Ralph with your voice, we need you to read
the book. And I'm like, that's easy, let me read
(18:53):
the book. Yeah. And I know early on when you
talk about dream Girls, because that was the big success
where everybody was coming to you after that you were
the belle of the ball. But also you didn't foresee
what that could have meant for you financially at the time.
So discuss that because that's something in the book that
you talk about. I ery Lee always felt that dream
(19:17):
Girls was going to be a big hit. I always
felt that. But we were young. I mean we were like,
what twenty when we started twenty three and then I
turned twenty four a week after opening night, you know
of the show. So we were young, and when you're
(19:37):
young and you don't know a whole lot back then,
you do crazy things like sell away your rights for
a dollar a dollar. To this day, I haven't gotten
a check from the magnificence that is dream Girls, and
it hurts me to my heart now. The cast of
(19:59):
Chorus they went through the same development process that we did,
the workshopping of the showy they signed the same contract.
They filed a class action suit. Yeah, as they won, right,
but for whatever reason, the cast of dream Girls chose
not to do that. And is it ever too late
(20:23):
to do that. I don't know if it's ever too late.
But sometimes I tell you I look back at it,
and I said, I have regained and captured everything the
devil took from me. Definitely, yes, thank you, But I
also don't see why people don't go for what you
wanted to do them and that and also why on
(20:44):
the other side they don't want to do the right thing.
They made so much money, why not even if it
was just a small, tiny percentage, just that as a
gesture to say, we see you, we appreciate what you contributed.
We know you signed a bad deal that you shouldn't
have signed. Let's make this right. Thank you. And I wish,
and I say to this day, because only one of
(21:05):
them is alive out of that original creative company, I say,
maybe someone will do that. Maybe someone will leave us
something in their will. May be because he was probably
for about the principle at Yeah, it is principle of it.
It's the absolute principle of the whole thing. Well, fortunately,
(21:26):
like you said, you have recaptured everything that you should have.
But I just feel like the right thing. I'm a big,
like the right thing to do type of person. Thank you,
you know that's why you're going way up here we
go exactly now. I also want to discuss other things
about your brand. Right you are fabulous? You are a
(21:47):
diva again? Tell us what diva stands for? The divinely inspired,
victoriously alive, aware, audacious and if it was Sunday, we
would be anointed. Yes, right there you go any day,
right now. And what people also have to understand is
your first role with Sydney Poisier. How do you that's
way up now? I don't even know where you you know,
(22:09):
get to go from there, but that experience had to
have left such a big impact. That had to be
the time when you knew it's way up for real.
I gotta tell you, mister Sydney Poitier was so wonderful
to me. He was like having your uncle in on set,
directing you, being so wonderful to you as his special
niece and guiding you along the way. It was just
(22:32):
an amazing time for me with him. And when I left,
I was given this little black box with had all
the makeup and stuff that I would need to do,
you know, to make me me on any set, because
he knew that there would not be the same sort
of community that we had on that set as I
(22:54):
moved into the industry, and he said to me, I
wish this industry had more to offer you, because you
deserve it. And I look at it now, and when
I say I am what believing looks like? I am
what knowing that you belong here looks like. Because suppose
i'd left, suppose I'd given up on my dreams, suppose
(23:16):
I had stopped believing in myself, I would not be
here in this time, in this space, with a book
to write and stories to tell. And as a spoiler,
she was up against his daughter. Okay, really read the book,
You really read the book? Like, yeah, no, I don't.
Why are we even doing this? Why are we here?
(23:36):
I mean when I walked into that audition, that's exactly
how I felt. I was like, but that's a good lesson,
thank you. Ye Are there any roles that you're surprised
that you got? No? Never, never, there there are roles
that I was surprised that I lost. But the person
who ended up getting it, they were supposed to get it,
(23:57):
and that's the way God planned or Goddess planned it.
And people were surprised at roles that you turned down to.
Like what I mean, I know you said in the book.
You know that there's roles that you're like because of
your own morals and opportunities that you had that you
could have gotten but you said no to. And I
know that's not an always an easy thing to do
as you're thinking about being you know, getting a check
(24:18):
of course, because that is important. It is making a living,
it's a business. Also tell you that my career has
been intentional. I wanted my people, my community, my family,
the kids that I didn't have back then, to be
able to look at my body of work and say
that's our Shareley Ralph, that's my mother. When young people
(24:45):
come up to me and say, miss Ralph, I see you,
I get you, and I thank you for what you did.
That was with intention. It was done for them. What
was the most challenging role that you did take ever?
Would you say that it left you feeling like oooh exhausted?
(25:07):
This was you know, I don't really know, because all
of them and this is what happens for me as
a performer. When it is well written, and when you
know that's your role, they jump up off of that
page and into you. Their voice comes to you, the
way they walk, the way they talk. I mean, look
(25:29):
at me playing Barbara Howard. It is that I'm playing
a very different woman than myself. Yes there's a kernel
of me in her, but she's different. The way she
comports herself, the way she speaks, her voice is deeper,
you know, the way she talks to people, you know,
(25:49):
the way she holds herself, her love of so many pearls.
You know, Oh my goodness. You know when you look
at me as d Mitchell in Molitia, another different woman,
when you look at me as um Nicki's lover in
Ray Donovan Happy Saint Patrick's Day, Um Ray Donovan, that
(26:11):
completely different woman, thank you, thank you. That was a
woman who swung on a pole. You know, that's a
whole different vibe. But all of them came up off
the page and said, you got me and I got you.
You're such a performer. Even when she's telling me stories
like I feel like yeah, because I feel like I
(26:31):
was at the party just but it gives me like
it gives me like, you know, like that Mike Tyson
had his one man you know show where he sat
and he yeah, I definitely couldn't you definitely see yourself
doing something like that just coming you have this book,
like could you can tell a story and you are
a Broadway just would you ever imagine doing something like that?
I was just asked by a producer if I would
(26:54):
consider coming to Broadway to do a one woman show
for a limited run. And my first action was hell, no,
I don't want to work that hard right now. But
the more I think about it, you know, as time
passes and I can you know, fit it into my schedule,
it's seeming more like hell, yeah, yeah, yeah, we've see that.
(27:15):
Because you know, I also feel like, even now, not
enough black people go see Broadway plays, and that's a
dog on shame. Yeah, because so many shows that we
should see. You should see the Michael Jackson just for
that talented young amazing mouth for us. Yeah, you should
see Miles for us. You should go and experience the
harder they come at the public theater to go to that.
(27:38):
Tina Turner, you should Tina Turner. You know, there's so
many things that you we should see. But there seems
to be a problem with the Broadway community in not
knowing how to market to the black community. For whatever reason.
For forty five years that I know about, they have
had a problem reaching out to communities of color. Yeah,
(28:02):
I don't know what to do about that, because I
want to go see for Color Girls on Broadway and
it came and went, Yes it do and I felt
like it wasn't properly marketed. It was not, you know,
but it was amazing. Yeah, it would you see thoughts
of a Colored Man. No, I didn't see that. That
one was another one. We got killed by m covid.
I was a producer on that. And then there was
the Ohio State Murders with Audra McDonald, a wonderful story
(28:26):
that a lot of people missed that should have seen.
I was a producer on that as well. But there's
so much out there. That's something I definitely want to
highlight more. Is going to see going to the theater, Yes,
because it is like the perfect I want to go
see The Black Odyssey on opening night and that's in
a play on Thirteenth Streets. So I went there to
(28:47):
go see that. But I enjoy going to the theater
so much your phone is away, you know, just like
going to the movies. And I think it's just another
level of of like the fact that it's a one
take things. You know, you go out there and cut.
There's no cut. Yeah, there's no Can I try that again? No,
you have to know your lines because everybody else is
(29:08):
depending upon you, and I can't tell, like if somebody
messed up a line, you know, to be able to
keep going so that we don't even know. That's a
whole another type of skill to have. I was doing
a show called Thoroughly Modern Millie on Broadway, and I
had this monologue about my green glass love and this
(29:28):
particular night, My god, what happens? I couldn't remember see
the hat happened? Remember, And I was talking about bottles
of green glass and green this and green. It would
have been perfect forum Saint Patrick's death. But I was
just lost the second time, the first time that happened
(29:50):
to me though, I was doing dream Girls, and um,
I remember it was one night only you won't oh
my love and my devotion, all of that honey. After
that blank blank, and I remember hearing the stage manager
say her MIC's dead. The on stage manager said her
(30:12):
brain is dead, And at that moment I realized it
might be time to take a long vacation and possibly
move on. And that's exactly what I did. Yeah, well,
that was a sign listen to your body. I listened
to all of it. I listened to the vibes. I
listened to the signs, all of that stuff. It's there.
All we have to do sometimes is listen, because you
(30:34):
know it's speaking to us. But sometimes we want to
listen to something else. You have to listen to your gut.
You have to listen to your own self. You have
to accept your own vibrations because they're there for you
to receive an answer. What was your first bag investment?
My first big myself? Yeah, my first big investment was
(30:56):
in myself. I and that investment and in myself has
paid off. It is paid has paid off in the
way I look it is. It is paid off in
the way I've been able to raise my children. It
has paid off in the way I've been able to
stay married to my second husband, Senator Vincent Hughes of Pennsylvania, Philadelphia.
(31:21):
In particular, it has paid off in the ways that
I've been able to build my brand, build my business,
you know, and uh as a Delta you know. You
know when we go to our conventions, your convention, my convention.
You know, everybody has something to sell. And I would
do these T shirts and the T shirts. I mean
there were times when I needed to sell some T
(31:43):
shirts and they got me over so much. We will
buy some apparel. Baby, I'm to this day to a
Delta event without guys. I'm telling because we will buy,
you know, building upon that. You know. Now my kids
(32:03):
have taken it over with their nonprofit Walk Good La
and you know, their merch and things, and my son
put out there, you know, the graphic of me and
this is what believing looks like. People bought the bags,
they bought the sweatshirts, they bought the T shirts, all
of that stuff. You know, it adds up. You know.
I was crazy about red lipstick, you know, and I
(32:25):
did the reds and people bought the lipsticks really good
lipstick too, you know. And I like to give people quality.
But I've learned this one thing. I always felt that
if I could give you the best for the least
amount of money, you would want it. That's not the case.
People like to pay. They want to pay. Yeah, people
think the more expensive it is the better. Yeah, that's it.
(32:46):
So now my days the lower price guilty because sometimes
I'm looking for stuff and I'm like, which my should
I get? I'm like, well this is cost a little more,
it's probably better. See the quality they got me. That's it.
What about being a doubts at and a sority, what
has that done for you? I don't have sisters, and
now I have the thousands of sisters, and it is
(33:10):
wonderful from me, and I'm sure you feel like this
with your soul wars. It is wonderful for me to
walk into a room of women who are one happy
to see you, two welcoming you with open arms, and
three want to tell you what's going on with them
and want to hear what's going on with you. And
(33:31):
that to me is absolutely magic. So I love also
the attention to scholarship, that education is important, the attention
to community, attention to the people in the community, and
now we're having a new shift to an attention towards self,
(33:53):
that your health and well being really matters. I just
love all of that. No, I'm mental health. I got
my green juice right here, Come on now and one
thing I wanted to ask you about in the book,
and you kind of you didn't get into detail about it.
You talk about the Me Too movement and you even
set an experience where a promoter like put his hand
on your leg and that would happen at times, right
(34:17):
and so, and I noticed that you didn't get into
detail about it. But do you feel like that's something
that a has had any effect on your career in
any way at all, and be that you would at
some point get more into detail about because it is,
like you said, with the Me Too movement and that
happening all the time, that's a hard thing for women
to even speak up about. Hans. I didn't say a
(34:39):
whole lot about it. Yeah, yeah, and not like detailing
names or who it is, but just even the effect
that that has on you because horrible, Yeah, because you know,
oh my god, it's like I can think about these
things and I tell you there was one incidence where
I it was like the third time something like this
(35:00):
had happened to me, and I thought to myself, what
did I do to deserve that? I'm I'm, I'm my
skirt is at my knees, I have on a sweater blouse.
What made this man think that he could just come
over and put his hands on my body in front
(35:25):
of He didn't know me, right, he did not know me,
and I was in that. It passed. Years later, I
was in a situation and that man walked through the door.
He sat down at the table across from me. He
did not remember any of this, but I had to
(35:47):
let him know what he did that night. Oh, I
absolutely confronted. He was right there. I had to confront
him about it. Do you want to know what was
the shocking part? Everybody around the table was appalled that
I would stand up for myself. What they were appalled.
(36:08):
They told me that I should be ashamed of myself
and why would I even bring that up? And at
the dinner table. That's crazy, And that's why women find
it difficult to speak. That's why, because you don't get
the support. People don't believe you. They don't understand why
you're bringing it up. They're like, well, why didn't you
say something at the time, Because it's a feeling a
(36:29):
powerlessness that you have at the time, and you're also
shocked and people don't support you. Yeah, I could tell
you of another time This was a famous TV judge,
not Judge Mathis. I love him. He's a great man.
Not him, because I love Judge Mathis too, Judge. No, no no, no,
he's a great man. This was another one. I'm at
(36:50):
a very public place. I have on like you see me.
I was suited, I had my suit on. I was
handling my business for the teleg vision show I was
on at that time. He and I were on the
same network. This man walked in, grabbed me by the
back of my neck, turned me around and rammed his
(37:12):
nasty tongue down my throne, and everybody at the network
saw it, and the uh. The mayor of New Orleans
at the time was um with my blanket on. His name,
Mark Morial. I called Mark Morial, Mark Moreal. He said,
(37:34):
you want me to send the police there right now,
because we will fix his you know what, right now?
Somebody at the network tapped me on the show that
they said please don't do you know that They did
not want any bad press. Yeah, I can believe around
their show and did not care what had just happened
(37:58):
to me. It wasn't so bad, was it. That's the
kind of stuff that happens. Yeah, that's what happens. That's
what makes it hard for women to speak up about
these And I'm glad you said that because I hear
that all the time. When women come forward, people are like, well,
why is she telling this story now? Thank you? Well,
why didn't she say something when it happened? Thank you?
(38:19):
And that's why I don't get the support. Thank you?
And even and if they see it, they saw what happened.
It's not that bad, is it. Please don't say anything.
We don't need the bad press. It's a brand new show.
Yours is a new show. I was like, Lord, have mercy.
They don't think, well, this is gonna hit the fan
because he's gonna do this to somebody else, because we're
(38:40):
protecting this. Yeah, and even you questioning what you were wearing,
like what did I do to make this happen? Because
people think that too, well, what did you have on? Well?
Why did you bring that to his room? Well? He
told me we wanted to look at the script, you know,
and people act like it's your fault. You shouldn't have
been in that position, or you shouldn't have been wearing this.
So I just when I was reading that, I was like,
I can't even imagine the things that you've been through
(39:01):
being in this business as long as you have, you know,
And I might not have heard it publicly, but I
just think it's important because there's so many women that
might feel like they got some power from here, and
you talk about it too. Well. I'm going to tell
you something. You know, if a man invites you up
to his room and it's the middle of the night,
don't go right to have him meet you down in
(39:22):
the lobby, right although I will tell you that one
time Michael Jordan invited me up to his room. What
time it was, in the middle of the night. I
did go, and you know what we did. We ended
up playing backgammon. We talked about our parents, we talked
about our families, and we ended up being good friends
(39:43):
for a long time. We had no sex whatsoever. In fact,
he referred to me as the big sister, and I said,
I'm always the big sister, you know, And we just
had the best time ever. Yeah, there's good people and
bad people, Yes there are. What kind of advice do
you have for someone who woul who works in Hollywood
is a woman and went through an experience like you
(40:03):
went through like what advice would you give them? Speak
up or no or it's hard. I would say nowadays,
speak up, tell your truth. Do not carry the burden
of that pain, and especially if it's something you feel
that you cannot work through, because you know, situations like
this experience is like this drive some people crazy. Yeah,
(40:25):
it hurts them to their core. They get changed forever.
You know, some people never work again, and they never
work again in this business. You know, I am shocked
that we're seeing what happened with the whole Harvey Weinstein
of it all. I'm shocked that they were actually able
to take him down. You know, there's some other men
(40:46):
that can yell out live, just grab them by the
you know what, and they become president. They become exactly Yeah.
You know, so you just never know. And people do lie,
They straight up lie, and people do believe their lies.
And you can very you can get very deeply hurt.
(41:07):
But try to protect yourself, you know, try to protect
your spirit as much as you can, and try you know,
there's a thing called discernment. Try to you know, we
say feel the room, feel the experience, feel the person's vibe.
Because people can't help but show you who they are,
you know, so protect yourself. Don't go anywhere you think
(41:29):
there might be trouble, Just don't do it. Listen to
the signs well, listen Sharer or Lee Ralph, We thank
you so much for coming through. We did like this
when a whole nother I feel like we could talk
to you for maybe like four or five hours. I'm
not even gonna lie just about everything because there's so
many gems in this bug Diva two point or twelve
life lessons from me for you, and I have to
(41:50):
say it did touch me. I learned a lot more
about you than I ever knew before just your whole
career path. We've always seen how talented and amazing you are,
so this just took it to another level for me.
And want to encourage other writers, you know, if you
really writers and celebrities, if you really really want to
get into publishing your book. Not everybody's a great self publisher.
(42:11):
You can find independent publishers like Wordy, Marva Allen and
I'm working on getting my own imprint. Yes, we want
to see your books and we want to help you
make your money. You don't have to wait on somebody else.
You don't have to wait on the Big five. If
it's your time, let's see what you've got. Let's read
your book. Let's help you get on the journey of
(42:35):
empowering yourself to make your own money. Yeah, get a
better deal. This way to a better deal. Better, we
all make money together. Thank you so much, Sharylie, Ralph
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