March 21, 2024 • 45 mins
On this episode of We Talk Back, the ladies AJ Holiday and Tambam get into their S.I.N.S of the week including marriage rates and divorce rates, Saucy Santana vs. Gilbert Arenas feud, and the debate over New Orleans food. Now that tax season is upon us, are you talking finances with who you’re laying down with? For their main topic the ladies discuss the importance of finances in relationships. During the conversation, they spoke on how to start the dialogue about finances and how you can possibly tell if the person you're dealing with is good with money. Are you talking finances with your partner? Let’s discuss in the socials below.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:03):
For more podcasts from iHeart Radio, visit the iHeartRadio app,
Apple podcast, or whatever you listen to your favorite shows.
Welcome to We talk Back podcast, the production of iHeart
Radio and the Black Effect Network Talk Talk Talk.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
We're just two unapologetically black women with an opinion who talks.
Y'all really be living with these niggas and that's crazy
to me?
Speaker 1 (00:34):
Bitch were starting the show? Why are you talking about me?
Speaker 2 (00:36):
Anyway? What's up?
Speaker 1 (00:40):
Y'all? Thank you for tuning in for a new episode
and We Talk Back, a show dedicated to you by
just will be shocking up in the niggas that don't
is your co host? AJ Holiday two point Oh?
Speaker 2 (00:51):
What's up?
Speaker 1 (00:51):
Ten?
Speaker 2 (00:52):
It's official team band. I love y'all once again. I
love you too. AJ. How you doing. I'm doing well?
Speaker 1 (01:00):
Okay, it's sunny outside. I feel good. I feel like
I'm you know, lucky again this week?
Speaker 2 (01:06):
How was your weekend? What'd you do? Nothing?
Speaker 1 (01:09):
Bitch went a boy? A band went by the bed
because the bitch been sleeping on the mattress on the floor.
Yes it's a good one though, costs a couple of dollars,
but yeah, I got me a bed coming chat.
Speaker 2 (01:21):
Just growing up. That's good, growing out, y'all. I'm proud
of you, y'all. I was supposed to go to DC
this weekend for the Tequila Talk Live show, but man,
I the ms was mssing this weekend and I just
could not be bothered to get up and go nowhere.
My body just was not with it. I was so
(01:42):
upset because I bought tickets to the show, had my
flight books and everything, and my body that shit is
just you know, it do what it wants. So I
didn't get to go. But shout out to Tequila Talk.
He had a live show. It was on the sixteenth.
I'm sure it was lit, and I will not miss
the next one. And I know I said that last time,
but I really did all the things to be there.
(02:03):
I just couldn't make it happen. So I just stayed
at home, and uh, I watched this movie Damsel on Netflix.
Speaker 3 (02:10):
Y'all.
Speaker 2 (02:10):
If y'all like movies, if y'all like sci fi movies,
y'all gotta watch that Damsel.
Speaker 1 (02:14):
It's about a dragon, a bad bitch dragon. So oh,
I want to see that. I want a dragon.
Speaker 2 (02:20):
It's of course you, of course you want to Drag
Dracoda's bitchy'all be like Calisi on y'all host. So, yeah,
I watched that movie. It was good and I just
kind of chilled. Yeah, that's all got on the scale.
I'm one hundred and eighty three pounds. Don't play with.
Speaker 3 (02:35):
Me, girl, Fuck you guy.
Speaker 1 (02:39):
I did take a laxative today, so I didn't lose
two pounds right before this recording. Okay, let's get in
the stupid Internet news.
Speaker 2 (02:52):
And happier news. Marriage race are up and divorce races
are down. Dadda share by the a A Right dadda
share by the CDC on Friday shows how the number
of marriages grew from five point one per one thousand
people in twenty twenty to six point two per one
thousand people in twenty twenty two. The highest rate observes
(03:12):
is twenty eighteen, and a four percent increase from the
year before. Between two thousand and nine and twenty thirteen,
the marriage rate stood at six point eight per one
thousand people, according to the CDC, so people are getting
married and staying married. More people got divorced.
Speaker 1 (03:28):
I think during COVID twenty twenty right twenty nineteen twenty
twenty is when people realize I can't be with this
motherfucker no more, because we were forced to sit the
fuck down. So now a lot of people got divorced
during that time. And then if you survived COVID with whomever,
maybe your you know, a boyfriend, girlfriend, maybe those are
the people who are getting married now. So everybody who
(03:49):
wasn't supposed to be together have split, And then the
economy has always been based on double occupancy. I don't
know why people be out here trying to struggle by themselves.
Speaker 2 (03:58):
I be living with.
Speaker 1 (04:03):
Let me tell you, I have only lived with a
couple of men in my life. I have normally just
always lived by myself.
Speaker 2 (04:09):
But I do not that in my life.
Speaker 1 (04:11):
I don't feel like I do not want to pay
all my bills by myself when I was in college,
and I don't want to pay fifty percent either, So
there's that.
Speaker 2 (04:18):
When I was in college, I had a boyfriend. I
had my own place and he had his own place,
but we always kind of stayed at his place, so
I kind of lived with him, but I kind of
didn't because I still had my own shit.
Speaker 1 (04:29):
But one foot in, one foot out, yep.
Speaker 2 (04:32):
And then and then I live with one man in
my entire life for like three years. I think of that,
and that's the three of the hardest years of my life.
Exactly all my life, I had to fight.
Speaker 1 (04:47):
Girl, trying to cohabitate with someone else is very fucking stressful.
And I followed this bitch on Instagram. Her name is
Elena something. She's a Russian lady, like I want to
live that life, like I need I need need everything
in my place, in perfect order, where it's supposed to
be at like I'm trying to lie.
Speaker 2 (05:05):
I'd rather be jealous of those people. Are their lives
really like that structured? Because how the fuck you do that?
Like my it could be my house looks like in order,
but until you open a drawer, open a closet, I
look under the Oh, well, you can't get under my bed,
but if you could have, it would have been shipped
(05:26):
up under there. But that closet. Lord, have mercy. So
we're happy to see that people are staying married, whether
it be for money or love. We're happy to see
y'all staying together.
Speaker 1 (05:39):
Poor people get married for love. Remember we said that, Okay.
Speaker 2 (05:43):
As long as they staying together, I'm happy for you.
Drunk the broom, baby, whatever you gotta do, it's love.
Let me tell you something. I've been obsessed with marriage lately.
I've been picking out wedding songs. I've been picking out
wedding colors. I ain't got the first man. That's manifestation,
but like, yeah, so weird because I heard the song,
like y'all, I literally saved it the other day and
(06:05):
I put wedding song playlists and I had to like
bust out laughing at my motherfucker stuff because I've.
Speaker 1 (06:12):
Had I have had vowels written for many years in
my cell phone, and you know, like nowadays, like once
you save some shit, it goes like I have my vowels.
Speaker 2 (06:21):
It's a song called first Time by Teaks. If y'all
getting married, y'all need to put that in your wedding playlist.
It is so beautiful. So yeah, that's on my playlist too.
Speaker 1 (06:33):
That's how you manifest though. You just start doing it. Things,
start planning, shit, you trying to move, start packing.
Speaker 2 (06:38):
Listen, I got a really really hot date this weekend.
I'm trying to make that my husband and I think
put them in a little job. Ain't putting no more
niggas in No more jars. The last thing I put
in my jar ignored me the whole time we was
in the club together. I'm not putting no more niggas in,
no more jars for that shit. I just playing Saucy
(07:01):
Santana and Gilbert Arenas. What happened girl?
Speaker 1 (07:06):
So Sacy is sharing a message for Saucy Santana has
a message for Gilbert Arenas. After the formal NBA player
praised the rappers twerking skills. Okay, he said he didn't
know whether or not to throw money at Saucy or
at Magda Stallion. I don't know how a heterosexual man
(07:26):
could be confused by either one of those things, but okay,
I'm here for it regardless. So here's how things initially
popped off between Gilbert Arenas and Saucy Santana on March
eighth and episode of Arenas's podcast with stream on YouTube.
About an hour and eight minutes into the show, Arenas
broadfellow former NBA player Nick Young as a guest. So
(07:49):
apparently Nick Young and Saucy Santana are homeboys, okay, and
Gilbert feels like he's not a raper, but he feels
like Saucy Santana isn't a rapper, and how could this
be your homeboy?
Speaker 2 (08:04):
This you know gay man. He was like, oh, hell,
that's your dog. It's just how old is that nigga?
Speaker 1 (08:12):
Let's see old enough he gets on my goddamn nerves. Okay, Like, yeah,
he would be afraid of gay men or just being
seen with one. I don't know what the problem would be.
You see that picture recently that fifty Cent posted with
him young Buck and some.
Speaker 2 (08:27):
Trans woman. No, and fifty.
Speaker 1 (08:30):
Cent was like, now I know why that boy like
young Buck was far away from fifty Cent in this woman.
But you know Young Buck had been caught with a
transsexual at some point, so you want to keep up
being parents that you don't fuck with them. Meanwhile, right,
meanwhile you dibbling, dabbling and skippity pappen with them niggas. Anyway,
(08:54):
that could be what Gilbert Arenas is on.
Speaker 2 (08:56):
I don't know. It'd be those older millennials that like
really be like low key homophobic, and I think it
expawns from the culture of the nineties in the early
two thousands where people were extremely homophobic, you know, especially
in a hip hop and black community that was a
huge thing. But I mean, you can be friends with
someone who's gay. That's dumb, that's stupid.
Speaker 1 (09:16):
Right, And obviously Nick Young is comfortable in his own
skin sexuality, and yeah, where he can have friends who
prefer the same sex. And because the thing is is
that even though a man is gay, gay men still
have preference. You may not be his preference, right yo words, Okay,
he may not even like you. But just because a
man is gay, you automatically think he wants match.
Speaker 2 (09:38):
But Saustly was like, I do like you, I do.
I will take you down, gilbrit Man, Yeah that was
that was interesting. I didn't know Gilbert Arena's It's a
lot of sports shows out now, how I didn't know
he had a podcast. So everybody got a damn podcast.
(10:02):
Shah everybody and they mama, well, I can't wait to
see what unfolds with this, Saucy Gilbert. Good luck to
you too whatever happens.
Speaker 1 (10:14):
So Golorrilla tweeted New Orleans really do got the best
food in the whole wide world.
Speaker 2 (10:19):
I stamp it you and you too. You're on to
stamp some shit, Golilla.
Speaker 1 (10:22):
Okay, I'm from Charleston, South Carolina, and I feel like
we got the best food, and it's very similar to
a lot of the things that people eat normal.
Speaker 2 (10:30):
Even a dialect is kind of similar, right, I think.
But I have similar cuisine for sure.
Speaker 1 (10:36):
Because it's a lot of good places to eat at
in Charleston. But this may be an unpopular opinion as
much as I see posts online about people talking shit
about white people and how the food look unseasoned and
all that. Sama y'all over seasoned food. You do not
have to use everything in your cabinet to make food
taste good. I lean towards using herbs and spices more
(11:00):
and salt and larries. Okay, y'all put butter on everything.
Speaker 2 (11:05):
Let me tell you something. The best food I ever
had in my life was in Soul. Korea sold them.
Korea's got sold okay, because that food was so good.
It definitely had some black and fluids. I don't care
what nobody said. That food was so good out there. Now,
we do use a lot of season I remember I
was like at my white girlfriend house and I was like,
(11:26):
let me cook the chicken because I don't know what
you're about to do. And I might have got over
zealous with the Laris because I felt like I had something.
Speaker 1 (11:33):
To prove.
Speaker 2 (11:37):
And that shit was salty as fuck. I was like,
my bad, not you ruined that lady chick. I didn't
ruin her chicken because I just had something to prove
as a black person that we used season and I
just went too crazy with it.
Speaker 3 (11:50):
Yo.
Speaker 1 (11:50):
I used missus Dash a lot. You know, it's salt free.
It has like garlic, all these different herbs and stuff,
and then I just added like a pinch of salt
and pepper, you know, just depending on what I'm cooking.
Speaker 2 (12:00):
If I'm I don't eat chicken this.
Speaker 1 (12:02):
Shit, so I eat fish, a lot of fish. So
I usually use kinda not the same seasoning because I
don't want all my food to taste the same, right.
Speaker 2 (12:09):
But some of y'all put to I watched these.
Speaker 1 (12:12):
Videos on Instagram, and I'm like, they take a bowl
and they put all this seasoning in the bowl and
pour it on top. That is wild to me, because
there's no way this shit tastes good, Like I want
to taste some of this food.
Speaker 2 (12:25):
I got a theory. I think it is the season
is that we use as black people that's given Black
women fibroids.
Speaker 1 (12:33):
It's all the things because a lot of that stuff
has MSG. And I don't know if y'all know or not,
but that season accent, that's all that is. MSG is
assault substitute. And I know in Charleston for sure, most
black people are putting accent on everything. It's MSG, that's
all it is. That long ass mono, whatever clos word,
(12:53):
that's all it is. Yeah, our food is hereditary, hereditary,
not the diseases, right, So shout out to New Orleans.
I would agree that they probably have the second best
cuisine in America. Okay, travel a little because I mean
some are shit.
Speaker 2 (13:09):
Ain't touch another country. I like New Orleans food, but
I also like Charleston too. I ain't gonna front.
Speaker 1 (13:14):
Yeah, I've only been to New Orleans one time, and
I don't recall having a good meal there. And it
may have been the places I went to, you know.
But we cook some of the same simular shit like
rad rice, jambalaya, all that shit. We could just call
it something different. Oftentimes weat a lot of crabs, blue crab,
(13:36):
like I'm sick of the crab tasting like roger wood sausage.
Speaker 2 (13:39):
I don't like that shit. Who are I don't Yeah,
I don't like, don't put no sausage in my bag
because it just like everything tastes like sausage. And a
lot of people don't know what roger Woods are, Like
DM must if y'all know what a roger Wood sausage is,
because then here and Charlotte I talk about roger Woods,
they'd be like, what's that? How the fuck y'all don't
know what a roger Wood is. Y'all ain't had a
(14:00):
sausage until you had a roger Wood period.
Speaker 1 (14:02):
Girl, I think you used to bust in the microwave.
Speaker 2 (14:05):
Oh not bust's say, it's been a minute since I
so so anything say everything sounds sexual sexual. I'm sorry.
Speaker 1 (14:17):
Growing up, if we didn't have roger Wood sausage, we
ain't have.
Speaker 2 (14:20):
Nothing to eat. We at least have yeah period.
Speaker 1 (14:27):
All right, y'all, listen, we are we've ended cuffing season essentially, right.
They say it ends uh begins in October sometime ends
around Valentine's Day and we in tax season now. So
is it a good time to start talking to your
bay about finances? If you guys have made it, you've.
Speaker 2 (14:45):
Been getting at Roger Wood, you talking about money yet
we're gonna talk about it when we come back.
Speaker 1 (14:55):
Before we get into the today's topic. Y'all. I saw
a white girl. She was saying she was on a podcast,
and she was talking about all the things she does
for he husband. She was like, I rub his head,
you know, she basically like caresses him like a baby
to put him to bed and shit like that. And
when he wakes up, she makes some coffee, she massages
his back like all of those are like that might
(15:16):
be his love language, like touch, touch. I don't see
what the big deal was. Like women was in the
comments like wow, anybody doing all that? But she may
just be talking about it verbally. But it's natural, right
when you love somebody, you rubbing them up. I rather
rub a nigga back to sleep like a baby than
they have to have sex every night. Nigga, I'm rubbing
this skin off.
Speaker 2 (15:37):
Your rubber too. But it's a sensory thing for me
because once I hit the weed, I'd be wanting something
to touch. So nigga here get rubbed.
Speaker 1 (15:46):
Like y'all ain't touching y'all, man, what's what's.
Speaker 2 (15:48):
Run with y'all? Yeah, I'm rub feet and everything has It's.
Speaker 1 (15:52):
Not my thing. Okay, No, I like to rub feet,
like with my feet, but like rub foot my hand.
Speaker 2 (15:58):
Oh no, I'm definitely giving my nigga fut message.
Speaker 1 (16:02):
I had that, not you trying to get that husband.
Speaker 2 (16:05):
I had that. It's all like a sensory thing for
me though, So it's don't even be about them seriously.
Speaker 1 (16:13):
All right, y'all, how do we start talking about money
and relationships? I mean, especially when you're about to maybe
perhaps cohabitate. I don't think we're doing the traditional way
of you know, being at your parents were old as
fuck now, is what I'm saying, speaker.
Speaker 2 (16:27):
So I'm not right.
Speaker 1 (16:28):
I'm not at my parents' house about to move in
with this man about to marry. We already passed that
order of things, right, So when is when is it
time or when is the appropriate time you think tam
to discuss finances when dating someone?
Speaker 2 (16:46):
I mean, as a younger, we passed dating right as
a girl. Shut up girl on the first day, let's
talk about it. It's like I'm joking, but I mean
that's how these young girls are. They talk about money
right out the gate, like if you're not paying to
play like they don't even want to talk to me.
I don't think that's right. Y'all need to calm down
(17:08):
with that, because y'all just gonna get somebody who only
got money and nothing else, and that's about everything else,
and that's low key broke. I know that sounds crazy
to y'all, Like he got all the money, but if
he ain't got nothing else, he still broke. Baby. I
had to learn that shit the hard way. So I
was in a beautiful place, miserable as fuck, with a
(17:30):
nigga who just had money. So trust me, that's not
all you want. But okay, when is the best time
to start talking about finances? I don't know, I think
see I feel like I know, like I don't exactly
know what a nigga got, but I know if a
nigga got some you know what I'm saying, Like I
(17:50):
don't just be out here like I can't tell if
he's poor or not. Right, So when we're discussing like
joint finances is when we start talking about living together,
When we start talking about moving in, I think that's
when you start talking about like do you expect me
(18:15):
to pay for shit? Like that's that's what and I
think I would go into it like I don't want
to pay. I don't want to pay for nothing. I'm
gonna just tell you that, right, I don't want to
pay for nothing, but I am willing to contribute in
some type of way, Like I'll pay the cable bill,
(18:35):
I'll pay the Wi Fi, I'll pay for my gas
in my car, payment in my cell phone bill. So
you don't want to pay for any living experience. I'll
pay for groceries. I don't want to pay no rent.
I don't want to pay no mortgage. I don't want
to pay no leads. I don't want to pay none
of that. No, I don't.
Speaker 1 (18:53):
Think I think the ideal like situation, right, we would
love would be like the woman moving into a man's home.
But we know oftentimes women owning homes more than men.
So the man is moving in which I don't think
any man should want to do that. You should probably
try to have your own and have the woman moving
(19:14):
with you. Right, You've already been fitting the bills in
your space, so adding a woman in there, there's intrinsic
value that women come with. Right, So like say, for instance,
you're a business owner, like I may not pay like
bills in the house, but somehow, because I'm here, existing
and breathing and nourishing you, your business has now explanged tenfold. Yeah,
(19:37):
this is what women bring should bring A good woman, right,
should bring to the table to where you're not concerned
about what she's actually paying for financially, right.
Speaker 2 (19:48):
Yeah, but that may not be the case for everybody.
Like some people are not going to you know, some people,
men and women included, are getting into relationships to lighting
a load on both of them.
Speaker 3 (19:59):
You know.
Speaker 2 (19:59):
So if you do go, if.
Speaker 3 (20:03):
You do here, present the fuck.
Speaker 2 (20:08):
Whatever works. Okay, whatever works.
Speaker 1 (20:12):
But I think that I don't think I've ever sat
down with a man, even when I was engaged about
to get married. I think I was kind of like
just being with somebody for a while, you kind of
know what their financial situation is, you know what I'm saying.
I had the good credit, this nigga old a bunch
of taxes, like I kind of knew what the fuck
going going on. Yeah, and then eventually like we're gonna
(20:35):
figure this shit out. I'm gonna go get get us
a business loan. All this shit, We're gonna pay that
shit down, Like we were trying to work together in a way.
But even even a situation like that can become like damn,
why you don't got this shit to get together on.
Speaker 2 (20:47):
Your own without me?
Speaker 1 (20:49):
It could start to feel like that, like why are
you depending on me to do this this thing that
you should have been this?
Speaker 2 (20:55):
Yeah, like I had I was dating this guy and
I liked him a lot, but and he was you know,
he had money or whatever, he was doing well for himself,
but he gambled. He had a very very bad gambling
habit like that that year during the football season. I
think he lost well over fifty thousand dollars gambling. And
(21:16):
that was like a yeah, I ain't gone into this, Nancy.
Speaker 1 (21:20):
That's the type of things you need to find out
when you ask about finances, because if somebody somebody, people
can appear to have things together, but then when you
actually get into the real action potatoes, you realize like, yeah,
he might look like he got shit going on, but
he's really in debt or he's living off credit, which
is okay, right, But if you have some liquid cash somewhere.
Speaker 2 (21:43):
Right, something so okay, how would you approach it?
Speaker 1 (21:46):
Like I don't talking about finances politics religion. They're all
like very touchy subjects, and especially.
Speaker 2 (21:58):
For men, men are very like they value their money
the way we value our bodies. So it's kind of like,
are you trying to take my virginity? That's how a
nigga with his money.
Speaker 1 (22:10):
What I would tell men and women listen, just put
your expectations out on the table. They won't really you
know what I'm saying, So people can get the fuck
on through if it's something that they don't want to
deal with. So I'm not saying the very first date,
you should be trying to see how much money this
man got. You can kind of get.
Speaker 2 (22:24):
An idea.
Speaker 1 (22:27):
Based on his lifestyle, how he lives, his social status,
like who he knows, you.
Speaker 2 (22:33):
Know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (22:34):
You can kind of gauge what type of man you're
dealing with without as actually asking him how much money
you got, unless you're now.
Speaker 2 (22:41):
In Atlanta, because them niggas is boo but for nesser
central goods. Damn, Like these niggas be like, yeah, I
live downtown and then it'd be like seven of them
in a high rise apartment or he only.
Speaker 1 (22:54):
Courting you to steal your social s down there in Atlanta.
But listen, remember Jim Bay, Remember the nigga from the
gym I told y'all was fucking with one. So he
was like actively, well, I don't know if it was
just he wanted me to do this thing or he
was actively looking for somebody to basically be in a
(23:14):
poly relationship with. And I'm like, listen, I don't like women,
and he wanted like somebody to move into his home.
I'm like, I don't like women, right, And then if
I did like women, who's to say I'm gonna like
your bitch in particular?
Speaker 2 (23:26):
Right right?
Speaker 1 (23:28):
And on top of that, I'm like, well, how much
money you got for a situation like this? He was like,
I got I got about three hundred thousand in the bank.
I don't think that's enough to take care of two
women and all the shit that you want to that's
not a bad starter help you financially. I feel like
he wants two women to help him get to the
next level.
Speaker 2 (23:47):
Well, I think if you in that, y'all all should
be helping in some type of way, right. You can't
just have two bitches laying around the house.
Speaker 1 (23:58):
I'm not moving in Listen. Even if I was down
with some type of poly situation. I'm not moving into
a house with another woman like your your fucking nuts.
When white men or other men do these type of things,
they yeah, everybody got their own house. I'm not about
to be in the house with you and another woman like,
you're nuts. You can't afford this situation. That's what I'm saying.
(24:18):
Three hundred thousand dollars.
Speaker 2 (24:20):
Two grown women can't live in the house together unless
they are also intimate with each other. I think they
have this. Yeah, they have to be in love with
each other too. And Susan period sink of bitch is
gonna be scrapping. He might be the one getting beat.
(24:42):
So I went on this website called elves dot com
and they have a list of things that you how
to get started with a conversation with your partner when
you're getting serious talking about money. So what it says is, uh,
here's a breakdown of what you two should share and discuss.
So you should first start with what each what are
(25:02):
each other's approaches to spending money. So this is a
good one to start with because it's about the day
to day stuff. What kinds of things do you think
are worth splurging on and saying before do you both
have a good idea of what you are coming in
with and what's going out? Do you track every penny?
Are you more of a fifty to thirty twenty kind
of person? Which one do you think you are? Track
(25:24):
every penny or fifty thirty twenty rule?
Speaker 1 (25:28):
Break that down?
Speaker 2 (25:29):
What does that really mean? So, okay, let's google it.
Speaker 1 (25:33):
I kind of I.
Speaker 2 (25:35):
Don't track every penny.
Speaker 1 (25:37):
I remember growing up and my mom would have her
checkbook register and she's writing down. We don't really have
to do that anymore because we have we have online banking, right,
but she'd write down everything she spent and have her
total at the bum. I definitely don't live that type
of life now. My older sister does because she was
really raised the longest with my mom. So she, even
(25:57):
though she has online banking, she stole rights out.
Speaker 2 (26:00):
Yeah, that's all just bad. That's when people use track
checking books, you know, so they just had everything written down.
The fifty to thirty twenty rule recommends putting fifty percent
of your money towards needs, thirty percent towards once, and
twenty percent towards savings. These saving categories also include money
you will need to realize your future goals. So that's
(26:21):
the fifty thirty twenty rule.
Speaker 1 (26:23):
Okay, so right now I'm definitely not doing twenty, but
I'm talking with a financial advisor trying to get my
life together for the future. So that's what I definitely invest,
but I probably spend more money than I invest at
this point. I make money off and off my investments,
(26:43):
but I be spending money, so I would say, I, no,
I don't do no fifty thirty twenty nothing. I'd be
swiping and then I'm scared to look at my account.
Speaker 2 (27:01):
I'd be avoiding.
Speaker 1 (27:02):
Logging into online binging, like I kind of got an
idea in my head and what the number gonna be
when I log.
Speaker 2 (27:07):
In, I'm like, I'm a penny picture, Like I save everything.
I save everything. My mama said, I hold a dollar
so tight. The ego on that motherfucker be screaming.
Speaker 3 (27:25):
Don't want to spend everybody el shit, But.
Speaker 2 (27:34):
That just comes from a mindset of growing up with less.
I just want to hold onto everything I get. I
really definitely down to like the penny for everything, Like
I literally put everything in the savings and then have
to like pull from it sometimes because I don't want
to touch it.
Speaker 1 (27:51):
I kind of do the same thing, and not with
savings because you know, you ain't supposed to be withdrawing
from savings account that many times because then you end
up with a fee.
Speaker 2 (27:58):
Right, So I got multiple checking.
Speaker 1 (28:00):
I do certain things out of But yeah, I'll fuck
around and be swiping from all three accounts all day long,
like oh, this one might not have no money left,
and let me go hit this one like.
Speaker 2 (28:11):
Wilin, No baby, I'm definitely in the grocery store if
it's a packaged chicken and eight is one for eight
sixty five, and there's one for eight sixty three.
Speaker 1 (28:22):
But that's savings, right, So you're looking for a deal always,
I'm definitely Yeah, me too. That's not really like uh
as far as keeping your finances in order though, because bitch,
you be looking at them chicken, but I know you
just have food delivered that you could have win and gotten.
Yeah I did so, saving a penny on a pack
of chicken, But you're paying these extra fees for Uber
(28:44):
Eats doesn't make sense.
Speaker 2 (28:45):
I need. I'll definitely be door dashing.
Speaker 1 (28:48):
Yeah, y'all tripping with that door dash it y'all are tripping,
go get your food. If you're trying to save money,
start there. If you are trying to like course correct
your finances, start at all the luxuries that these people
have created to get your coin.
Speaker 2 (29:02):
The girl, that's why I work hard, so I cannot
some things I'm not gonna give up, And that's a
door dawsh ever rebound again. All right. So the next
one is how do you each feel about your finances
at the moment? Like who has debt and if so,
are you working on paying it off? Some people manage
to avoid debt their whole lives, but most don't, and
(29:23):
paying it off has a big impact on how much
of your income is left for saving and spending. Discuss
what kinds of debt you each have student loans, car loans,
credit cards, et cetera, and what their balance and interest
rates are. Do they have an emergency fund just in case?
It might be a good to ask about their credit score.
People get very sensitive about their credit score, But.
Speaker 1 (29:43):
If you have a good one, you always bragging.
Speaker 2 (29:46):
But if you don't, you don't be like you asked
me all kind of personal shit.
Speaker 1 (29:52):
Like I'm not bragging on my credit score.
Speaker 2 (29:54):
Right now. But the thing is, I don't really care
about credit.
Speaker 1 (29:57):
I'm more like Glorella when she said I'm not fucked up,
but no credit score might be rich them all, and
I know how to beef my credit score up overnight,
so I'm never concerned about the credit score ship. But
the motherfucker taxes. When somebody mentioned taxes, like I get offended.
Speaker 3 (30:13):
Like why who are you?
Speaker 2 (30:15):
Who sent you? Who sent you?
Speaker 1 (30:18):
Like a nigga in a DM if he say he
worked for like any of the letters like why are
you here?
Speaker 2 (30:24):
Are you looking for me?
Speaker 1 (30:25):
Because they have a lot of creative ways to find
people that old taxes.
Speaker 2 (30:28):
My thing is, I just got mad when I started
becoming people who had the people who had to pay
taxes versus getting my check. I've always been there. Oh
what the hell? Why am I paying? I never got
big checks because I didn't have no kids, right, but
I done got like an eight three dollars check one
year now, bitch, don't get nothing I owe every time.
(30:49):
I hate that.
Speaker 1 (30:51):
The only time I've never not paid taxes is when
I'm doing some finiggling and claim somebody's kid. Other than that,
I always even when you were yard, I made more
money when I was younger, like bitch was balling in
her twenties. Like, I always paid fucking taxes unless I
had like a dependent to kind of offset the amount
(31:11):
of taxes I had to pay.
Speaker 2 (31:12):
But I've never gotten no stupid checks from taxing. I
never gotten read. I think I got like like a
student credit or some sort, like when I was in
college and got a couple dollars back, But I never
got no big checks.
Speaker 1 (31:25):
Yeah, like people with kids or people who would just
be doing the most filing all these kids elderly any taxes.
Speaker 2 (31:37):
The next one is what are your short term money plans?
Here's where you can go and feel for where you're
headed together over the next year or so. Do they
have plans to get the debt paid off? Do they
want to build an emergency fund? Do they want to
change jobs anytime soon? Are you currently saving for retirement?
Things like that. I definitely have a retirement fund. Yeah.
(32:02):
We don't have these conversations enough. You know, no, and
I don't think so, but I think that.
Speaker 1 (32:07):
Okay, if you're dating someone seriously, y'all now pass courting.
You're in a relationship and you're talking about finances, I
would think that, like, y'all need to be calculating the
price of an engagement ring too. But are you expecting
this other person to contribute to the things that you
have or are you there just to counsel them into
how to pay their debt off?
Speaker 2 (32:25):
Or like what are we doing?
Speaker 1 (32:27):
Like could this be a maybe you're walking away after
this conversation? Damn right, because nigga, I can't help you
too far at debt.
Speaker 2 (32:36):
I was dating this guy that I really liked, y'all,
I really liked him, Like everything was phenomenal. We got along,
he seemed to be he had a business, you know,
he had on his own store, and we were talking
about you know, he told me he had a daughter,
and we talked about the daughter, and then somewhere randomly
the conversation said, he came up and said he had
a son that lived thirty minutes away that I had
(32:59):
never heard nothing about. And we had been kicking it
for months. I was like, well, what's up with this son?
He was like if I don't know what's up with him?
And he's like, if that little nigga want to know
me when he gets big, he can come find me immediately.
My Cuchie dried up like the Sahara Desert prairie dars
(33:20):
start running past. It was like I heard Little House
of the Prairie thee music. That's how dry my coochie
got and I had to get up out of there
like immediately. That made me leave him alone, even though
I liked everything about him. But if you're somebody who
can say that about your own son who's thirty minutes away,
ain't nothing for me and you baby, nothing.
Speaker 1 (33:39):
So I mean kids are something that need to be
discussed during the finance time. Absolutely, you have back child support.
I told you just before. Like I used to work
at a pink like customer service so people would be
It was so many women black and white, okay, and
everybody else in between call and crying about how the
(34:00):
government has now garnished their taxes because their husband owed
back child support. So now my money's gone for the
kids we have together or for my kids. But you
had a joint bank account bank account with this person,
so yeah, do you have back child support? Okay, y'all
niggas can act like y'all don't give a damn about
a woman's income or her her her having a degree
(34:21):
or not when half y'all need help.
Speaker 2 (34:24):
With paying child support.
Speaker 3 (34:27):
Apparently, so yeah, children, that's not true.
Speaker 2 (34:30):
A j don't do that to do some of them.
Speaker 1 (34:33):
Girl, at a lot of them need help. I'm ashamed
to say this. My best friend has a child for
my second cousin.
Speaker 2 (34:43):
She took him to.
Speaker 1 (34:43):
Court because he was talking shit to her daughter, saying
like how much money he pays in child the whole time.
Speaker 3 (34:50):
Girls, she don't care.
Speaker 1 (34:51):
Whole time he was back, he had money, like back
child support he hadn't paid, but you brag into the
daughter about how much money you pay a child's for.
Speaker 2 (35:00):
Girl.
Speaker 1 (35:00):
They got in front of the judge and he was
like no in a super geechee voices. Imagine this man,
she got money, look at her.
Speaker 2 (35:09):
What does that have to do with anything? Nothing?
Speaker 1 (35:11):
Because at what point do you think you're not supposed
to be contributing at all?
Speaker 2 (35:16):
Right? You know two things for your child? Absolutely, I
need to.
Speaker 1 (35:20):
Know if you're on child' support. I need to know
how you how you take care of your kids. I
need to know that. Also, you know, at this age,
younger people maybe they don't have any kids. It's not
a topic that would come out when talking about finances.
Speaker 2 (35:33):
But yeah, if you're older, that's a conversation now. And
then the last one, what are your dreams for the future?
Are you working on it? This is the fun part.
Do you want to buy a home in a few years?
What do you dream about when you dream about retirement? Like,
that's the things that you can talk about. Putting those
things out on the table now will help you each
understand why the other person may be making today's financial
(35:55):
choices and gives you the opportunity to maybe even sync
up your plans once you're ready. That's dope. I Ideally,
for me, I would want to be in a relationship
where my man's money pays the bills and my money
creates the investments for us.
Speaker 1 (36:13):
That's entertainment some type of way. Yeah, like my maybe
my money is for entertainment. If we do our vacations,
all that we can have fly ash vacations. If I've
been saving all year for this thing.
Speaker 2 (36:23):
Now, I feel like, yeah, vacations, but also building new
streams of income. That's what my money is gonna do.
That's ideally how I would want our relationship to go.
Speaker 1 (36:32):
You know a lot of times people look at stay
at home moms. Oh, they're not contributing financially, but a
lot of them have like side hustles, online jobs, things
that they're doing from the house that may be making
more money. Like look at the TikTokers, right, Okay, it's
this one girl I'd be following on Instagram. She's a model,
sores or husband. They'd be making fun of her ass
(36:55):
on TikTok so bad. She's cooking. So she's cooking pregnant.
I mean she's making peanut butter and jelly sandwiches from scratch.
Bitch seeing her y baking the bread like, that's all content.
And she has over a million followers and she's making
money doing day to day life. We just had Lexi
(37:15):
your homegirl in here. Like people, you can literally make
money off of being a homemaker now.
Speaker 2 (37:20):
Right at this, As long as you got the right
camera angles, you can get a check.
Speaker 3 (37:25):
Right.
Speaker 1 (37:26):
So yeah, Like women with a lot of stay at
home moms have found a way to create online businesses
and they are driven into their households.
Speaker 2 (37:34):
All the time. Right, I agree.
Speaker 1 (37:36):
So I'm going to get a whiteboard and I'm going
to put up all my goals and my partner's goals
and we're going to execute things together. Like two people
is always better than me, right, always, especially when I
come to some money too many times two moneies.
Speaker 2 (37:53):
So however I'm making money, I always be telling bitches
where they got their man and they living in the house.
I'll be like, girl, I am in a single income home. Okay, relax,
don't tell me I gotta bring you no birthday gift.
I was gonna bring one, but I have a single
income home to relax.
Speaker 1 (38:14):
So I would say, talk about money often and soon. Yeah,
if you're planning on, like really being with this person,
because it's important.
Speaker 2 (38:22):
But that don't mean begging because some people get that wrong.
Speaker 1 (38:26):
Yeah, people be in bad moods when they when they
money fucked up. Right, So you don't want to be
in a relationship with somebody you didn't You didn't realize
this nigga was fucked up financially. Not a relationship is
going or this woman. Yeah, yeah, I will never be
considering women when I talk about money.
Speaker 2 (38:46):
I'm not talking about us. But don't know, man, want
to meet a woman, think she's great. The first conversation
she's like, hey, you're like, what's wrong with you? I
don't really want to talk about it. Don't tell me
what's that? Baby, what's wrong? I'm just saying, okay, well,
(39:07):
since you asks, I just I just have some debt
right now, and I just don't know how they're gonna
they're gonna put me out. I'm and get a victim
from my high rise apartment if somebody does not pay
this one for me, Like don Ni, No nigga wants
to hear that right out the gate.
Speaker 1 (39:23):
But if you're trying to get rid of him, go
ahead and do that, because either he gonna give you
the money or you're gonna get the fuck on through.
Speaker 3 (39:29):
Either way it's a win win.
Speaker 2 (39:30):
But yeah, I wouldn't.
Speaker 1 (39:32):
We're not talking not necessarily.
Speaker 2 (39:34):
Because you might run off a good guy because you just,
you know, coming out the gate telling him what you need.
You know, That's what I said.
Speaker 1 (39:41):
Unless you want to, unless your your your intention is
to get rid of him, don't do that right yeah,
because men will get lost if they think you're trying
to get in their purse real quick. Okay, But I mean,
I'm talking about my finances too, you're talking about yours.
We're trying to see how we fit in each other's life.
Financially because like it or not, on this realm. Okay,
(40:04):
you need money to live. We can't get around it. Right,
So y'all mad when somebody say, oh, I make he
makes thirty forty thousand dollars a year, or you have
two hundred dollars the date is one ninety five, but
your man only has such and such.
Speaker 2 (40:19):
How much you're paying?
Speaker 1 (40:20):
Like, what are we talking about? Okay, we need money
to breathe. At this point, air costs two dollars to
put gap to put air in the tire at the pumps,
So what are we talking about? So it's an important
conversation and you need to find out early as possible.
Speaker 2 (40:34):
You don't want to get in a relationship with.
Speaker 1 (40:36):
Somebody who has fucking people looking for him because he
owes fifty million dollars to MGM Studio like Bruno Mars.
Bruno Mars, they say they own him. Somebody said that
MGM Studios' excuse me, MGM Casino, not Studios. Casino owns
(40:58):
Bruno Mars because he is in debt to them from
his gambling habits.
Speaker 2 (41:02):
Yeah, yeah, that's what That's why I said I couldn't
talk to that guy because he was successful, but his
gambling habit was out of control.
Speaker 1 (41:08):
I can't do it and one wrong move, shit can
go south.
Speaker 2 (41:11):
This nigga had me down. Download and uh, what's that
sports bet and shit talking about? They're giving away a
free two hundred and fifty Go ahead and put it
on your phone. What I don't Okay.
Speaker 1 (41:24):
He sounds like he was already in debt and he
just was balancing his debt and he was managing debt
is what he sounds like.
Speaker 2 (41:30):
He was in sports betting.
Speaker 1 (41:32):
Mm hmm.
Speaker 2 (41:33):
Yeah. So I had to go. I had to exit
stage left, baby, because you're gonna have it. You could
build something great with someone and they gamble it all
the way. You got time for that. Get at it there,
So old, let me just say this. I know this
is kind of like off topic. I mean it's on topic,
but I used to work when I was living in Europe.
(41:53):
I used to work at this. Uh it was a
club and it had like, uh, the machines, the poker
machines like they had. Yeah, they had like a whole
section of slot machines and roulette and all kind of
stuff like that, right, And these people used to come
in there and they be on the machines all day long,
just feed and money into that machine. And this one
(42:15):
man he did not want to leave his machine because
he said it was getting hot, whatever that meaning. And
he doodooed on himself. He shipped his pants trying not
to lead a machine. Yeah, that's how bad it was.
And then they gonna tell me I got to go
in there to clean up. I said, I bet you
the fuck I won't. I bet you the fuck I won't.
(42:37):
I bet you I quit this motherfucker before I go
in there and clean up. No doodo out, no chair,
You'll find somebody else to do it.
Speaker 1 (42:43):
They throw that chair in the trash. What.
Speaker 2 (42:46):
I'm a bartender, that's it. I came here to make drinks.
That's whole casino funk his hell because this man couldn't
get up from that machine. On that note, yes, get
your finances in order.
Speaker 1 (43:06):
Yeah, talk about it. It's all about the Benjamin's baby period.
Talk about the money you got to it's a must.
You do want to end up in a bad situation.
That's your last last Yes, bitch, it's all about the Benjamins.
Speaker 2 (43:21):
My last last is you want a nigga to trick
on your trick first. It's like real gold niggas definitely
trick first.
Speaker 3 (43:30):
Somebody a little trinkt a little nice little.
Speaker 1 (43:34):
Because nine times out ten, nobody's ever done anything nice
for him, Like niggas don't get flowers.
Speaker 2 (43:39):
Yeah, but not that. Don't say that. I say that,
but don't do it because you are looking for something
in return. Do it because you actually care about this nigga.
You want to see him smile. And usually when you
treat somebody good, they'll treat you good in return. That's
my last last Yeah, okay, y'all.
Speaker 1 (43:54):
So if you enjoyed this episode, y'all tune in every
Thursday on The Black Effect podcast iHeartRadio app or over
the Fuck you get your podcast at.
Speaker 2 (44:02):
This is your co host, aj Holiday two point zero
on instagrams. What's Up Tam y'all is official Tambama on Instagram.
Y'all follow me like, y'all. We got ninety four days
till summer. I'm down twenty three pounds, y'all. If y'all
trying to get skinny with me, I'm doing urbal life.
Y'all can do it with me.
Speaker 1 (44:21):
Oh, y'all, I'm trying to get skinny with you fuck
the rest of them.
Speaker 2 (44:23):
Okay, I said, come on you, I'll send you some
samples and all kind of good shit if you want
me to. I'll put it in the mail to you girl.
But y'all, y'all can order it. The link is on
my page and the links on my DM. If you
do order something, I'll add you to my close friends
and we can have this conversation going and get fine together.
Some of it is coming. Let's not play, that's all
I'm gonna tell y'all. Y'all, don't be big backed to
(44:46):
on the boat. I mean, if you are, that's cool too,
But if you don't want to be, join me. Y'all.
I love y'all. Remember to speak now and never hold
your piece or your back.
Speaker 1 (44:58):
Fast a tattoo on my backpat ask me if I care.
Bye deuces. For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app,
Apple podcast, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
For more podcasts from iHeart Radio, visit the iHeartRadio app,
Apple podcast, or whatever you listen to your favorite shows.
Welcome to We talk Back podcast, the production of iHeart
Radio and the Black Effect Network Talk Talk Talk.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
We're just two unapologetically black women with an opinion who talks.
Y'all really be living with these niggas and that's crazy
to me?
Speaker 1 (00:34):
Bitch were starting the show? Why are you talking about me?
Speaker 2 (00:36):
Anyway? What's up?
Speaker 1 (00:40):
Y'all? Thank you for tuning in for a new episode
and We Talk Back, a show dedicated to you by
just will be shocking up in the niggas that don't
is your co host? AJ Holiday two point Oh?
Speaker 2 (00:51):
What's up?
Speaker 1 (00:51):
Ten?
Speaker 2 (00:52):
It's official team band. I love y'all once again. I
love you too. AJ. How you doing. I'm doing well?
Speaker 1 (01:00):
Okay, it's sunny outside. I feel good. I feel like
I'm you know, lucky again this week?
Speaker 2 (01:06):
How was your weekend? What'd you do? Nothing?
Speaker 1 (01:09):
Bitch went a boy? A band went by the bed
because the bitch been sleeping on the mattress on the floor.
Yes it's a good one though, costs a couple of dollars,
but yeah, I got me a bed coming chat.
Speaker 2 (01:21):
Just growing up. That's good, growing out, y'all. I'm proud
of you, y'all. I was supposed to go to DC
this weekend for the Tequila Talk Live show, but man,
I the ms was mssing this weekend and I just
could not be bothered to get up and go nowhere.
My body just was not with it. I was so
(01:42):
upset because I bought tickets to the show, had my
flight books and everything, and my body that shit is
just you know, it do what it wants. So I
didn't get to go. But shout out to Tequila Talk.
He had a live show. It was on the sixteenth.
I'm sure it was lit, and I will not miss
the next one. And I know I said that last time,
but I really did all the things to be there.
(02:03):
I just couldn't make it happen. So I just stayed
at home, and uh, I watched this movie Damsel on Netflix.
Speaker 3 (02:10):
Y'all.
Speaker 2 (02:10):
If y'all like movies, if y'all like sci fi movies,
y'all gotta watch that Damsel.
Speaker 1 (02:14):
It's about a dragon, a bad bitch dragon. So oh,
I want to see that. I want a dragon.
Speaker 2 (02:20):
It's of course you, of course you want to Drag
Dracoda's bitchy'all be like Calisi on y'all host. So, yeah,
I watched that movie. It was good and I just
kind of chilled. Yeah, that's all got on the scale.
I'm one hundred and eighty three pounds. Don't play with.
Speaker 3 (02:35):
Me, girl, Fuck you guy.
Speaker 1 (02:39):
I did take a laxative today, so I didn't lose
two pounds right before this recording. Okay, let's get in
the stupid Internet news.
Speaker 2 (02:52):
And happier news. Marriage race are up and divorce races
are down. Dadda share by the a A Right dadda
share by the CDC on Friday shows how the number
of marriages grew from five point one per one thousand
people in twenty twenty to six point two per one
thousand people in twenty twenty two. The highest rate observes
(03:12):
is twenty eighteen, and a four percent increase from the
year before. Between two thousand and nine and twenty thirteen,
the marriage rate stood at six point eight per one
thousand people, according to the CDC, so people are getting
married and staying married. More people got divorced.
Speaker 1 (03:28):
I think during COVID twenty twenty right twenty nineteen twenty
twenty is when people realize I can't be with this
motherfucker no more, because we were forced to sit the
fuck down. So now a lot of people got divorced
during that time. And then if you survived COVID with whomever,
maybe your you know, a boyfriend, girlfriend, maybe those are
the people who are getting married now. So everybody who
(03:49):
wasn't supposed to be together have split, And then the
economy has always been based on double occupancy. I don't
know why people be out here trying to struggle by themselves.
Speaker 2 (03:58):
I be living with.
Speaker 1 (04:03):
Let me tell you, I have only lived with a
couple of men in my life. I have normally just
always lived by myself.
Speaker 2 (04:09):
But I do not that in my life.
Speaker 1 (04:11):
I don't feel like I do not want to pay
all my bills by myself when I was in college,
and I don't want to pay fifty percent either, So
there's that.
Speaker 2 (04:18):
When I was in college, I had a boyfriend. I
had my own place and he had his own place,
but we always kind of stayed at his place, so
I kind of lived with him, but I kind of
didn't because I still had my own shit.
Speaker 1 (04:29):
But one foot in, one foot out, yep.
Speaker 2 (04:32):
And then and then I live with one man in
my entire life for like three years. I think of that,
and that's the three of the hardest years of my life.
Exactly all my life, I had to fight.
Speaker 1 (04:47):
Girl, trying to cohabitate with someone else is very fucking stressful.
And I followed this bitch on Instagram. Her name is
Elena something. She's a Russian lady, like I want to
live that life, like I need I need need everything
in my place, in perfect order, where it's supposed to
be at like I'm trying to lie.
Speaker 2 (05:05):
I'd rather be jealous of those people. Are their lives
really like that structured? Because how the fuck you do that?
Like my it could be my house looks like in order,
but until you open a drawer, open a closet, I
look under the Oh, well, you can't get under my bed,
but if you could have, it would have been shipped
(05:26):
up under there. But that closet. Lord, have mercy. So
we're happy to see that people are staying married, whether
it be for money or love. We're happy to see
y'all staying together.
Speaker 1 (05:39):
Poor people get married for love. Remember we said that, Okay.
Speaker 2 (05:43):
As long as they staying together, I'm happy for you.
Drunk the broom, baby, whatever you gotta do, it's love.
Let me tell you something. I've been obsessed with marriage lately.
I've been picking out wedding songs. I've been picking out
wedding colors. I ain't got the first man. That's manifestation,
but like, yeah, so weird because I heard the song,
like y'all, I literally saved it the other day and
(06:05):
I put wedding song playlists and I had to like
bust out laughing at my motherfucker stuff because I've.
Speaker 1 (06:12):
Had I have had vowels written for many years in
my cell phone, and you know, like nowadays, like once
you save some shit, it goes like I have my vowels.
Speaker 2 (06:21):
It's a song called first Time by Teaks. If y'all
getting married, y'all need to put that in your wedding playlist.
It is so beautiful. So yeah, that's on my playlist too.
Speaker 1 (06:33):
That's how you manifest though. You just start doing it. Things,
start planning, shit, you trying to move, start packing.
Speaker 2 (06:38):
Listen, I got a really really hot date this weekend.
I'm trying to make that my husband and I think
put them in a little job. Ain't putting no more
niggas in No more jars. The last thing I put
in my jar ignored me the whole time we was
in the club together. I'm not putting no more niggas in,
no more jars for that shit. I just playing Saucy
(07:01):
Santana and Gilbert Arenas. What happened girl?
Speaker 1 (07:06):
So Sacy is sharing a message for Saucy Santana has
a message for Gilbert Arenas. After the formal NBA player
praised the rappers twerking skills. Okay, he said he didn't
know whether or not to throw money at Saucy or
at Magda Stallion. I don't know how a heterosexual man
(07:26):
could be confused by either one of those things, but okay,
I'm here for it regardless. So here's how things initially
popped off between Gilbert Arenas and Saucy Santana on March
eighth and episode of Arenas's podcast with stream on YouTube.
About an hour and eight minutes into the show, Arenas
broadfellow former NBA player Nick Young as a guest. So
(07:49):
apparently Nick Young and Saucy Santana are homeboys, okay, and
Gilbert feels like he's not a raper, but he feels
like Saucy Santana isn't a rapper, and how could this
be your homeboy?
Speaker 2 (08:04):
This you know gay man. He was like, oh, hell,
that's your dog. It's just how old is that nigga?
Speaker 1 (08:12):
Let's see old enough he gets on my goddamn nerves. Okay, Like, yeah,
he would be afraid of gay men or just being
seen with one. I don't know what the problem would be.
You see that picture recently that fifty Cent posted with
him young Buck and some.
Speaker 2 (08:27):
Trans woman. No, and fifty.
Speaker 1 (08:30):
Cent was like, now I know why that boy like
young Buck was far away from fifty Cent in this woman.
But you know Young Buck had been caught with a
transsexual at some point, so you want to keep up
being parents that you don't fuck with them. Meanwhile, right,
meanwhile you dibbling, dabbling and skippity pappen with them niggas. Anyway,
(08:54):
that could be what Gilbert Arenas is on.
Speaker 2 (08:56):
I don't know. It'd be those older millennials that like
really be like low key homophobic, and I think it
expawns from the culture of the nineties in the early
two thousands where people were extremely homophobic, you know, especially
in a hip hop and black community that was a
huge thing. But I mean, you can be friends with
someone who's gay. That's dumb, that's stupid.
Speaker 1 (09:16):
Right, And obviously Nick Young is comfortable in his own
skin sexuality, and yeah, where he can have friends who
prefer the same sex. And because the thing is is
that even though a man is gay, gay men still
have preference. You may not be his preference, right yo words, Okay,
he may not even like you. But just because a
man is gay, you automatically think he wants match.
Speaker 2 (09:38):
But Saustly was like, I do like you, I do.
I will take you down, gilbrit Man, Yeah that was
that was interesting. I didn't know Gilbert Arena's It's a
lot of sports shows out now, how I didn't know
he had a podcast. So everybody got a damn podcast.
(10:02):
Shah everybody and they mama, well, I can't wait to
see what unfolds with this, Saucy Gilbert. Good luck to
you too whatever happens.
Speaker 1 (10:14):
So Golorrilla tweeted New Orleans really do got the best
food in the whole wide world.
Speaker 2 (10:19):
I stamp it you and you too. You're on to
stamp some shit, Golilla.
Speaker 1 (10:22):
Okay, I'm from Charleston, South Carolina, and I feel like
we got the best food, and it's very similar to
a lot of the things that people eat normal.
Speaker 2 (10:30):
Even a dialect is kind of similar, right, I think.
But I have similar cuisine for sure.
Speaker 1 (10:36):
Because it's a lot of good places to eat at
in Charleston. But this may be an unpopular opinion as
much as I see posts online about people talking shit
about white people and how the food look unseasoned and
all that. Sama y'all over seasoned food. You do not
have to use everything in your cabinet to make food
taste good. I lean towards using herbs and spices more
(11:00):
and salt and larries. Okay, y'all put butter on everything.
Speaker 2 (11:05):
Let me tell you something. The best food I ever
had in my life was in Soul. Korea sold them.
Korea's got sold okay, because that food was so good.
It definitely had some black and fluids. I don't care
what nobody said. That food was so good out there. Now,
we do use a lot of season I remember I
was like at my white girlfriend house and I was like,
(11:26):
let me cook the chicken because I don't know what
you're about to do. And I might have got over
zealous with the Laris because I felt like I had something.
Speaker 1 (11:33):
To prove.
Speaker 2 (11:37):
And that shit was salty as fuck. I was like,
my bad, not you ruined that lady chick. I didn't
ruin her chicken because I just had something to prove
as a black person that we used season and I
just went too crazy with it.
Speaker 3 (11:50):
Yo.
Speaker 1 (11:50):
I used missus Dash a lot. You know, it's salt free.
It has like garlic, all these different herbs and stuff,
and then I just added like a pinch of salt
and pepper, you know, just depending on what I'm cooking.
Speaker 2 (12:00):
If I'm I don't eat chicken this.
Speaker 1 (12:02):
Shit, so I eat fish, a lot of fish. So
I usually use kinda not the same seasoning because I
don't want all my food to taste the same, right.
Speaker 2 (12:09):
But some of y'all put to I watched these.
Speaker 1 (12:12):
Videos on Instagram, and I'm like, they take a bowl
and they put all this seasoning in the bowl and
pour it on top. That is wild to me, because
there's no way this shit tastes good, Like I want
to taste some of this food.
Speaker 2 (12:25):
I got a theory. I think it is the season
is that we use as black people that's given Black
women fibroids.
Speaker 1 (12:33):
It's all the things because a lot of that stuff
has MSG. And I don't know if y'all know or not,
but that season accent, that's all that is. MSG is
assault substitute. And I know in Charleston for sure, most
black people are putting accent on everything. It's MSG, that's
all it is. That long ass mono, whatever clos word,
(12:53):
that's all it is. Yeah, our food is hereditary, hereditary,
not the diseases, right, So shout out to New Orleans.
I would agree that they probably have the second best
cuisine in America. Okay, travel a little because I mean
some are shit.
Speaker 2 (13:09):
Ain't touch another country. I like New Orleans food, but
I also like Charleston too. I ain't gonna front.
Speaker 1 (13:14):
Yeah, I've only been to New Orleans one time, and
I don't recall having a good meal there. And it
may have been the places I went to, you know.
But we cook some of the same simular shit like
rad rice, jambalaya, all that shit. We could just call
it something different. Oftentimes weat a lot of crabs, blue crab,
(13:36):
like I'm sick of the crab tasting like roger wood sausage.
Speaker 2 (13:39):
I don't like that shit. Who are I don't Yeah,
I don't like, don't put no sausage in my bag
because it just like everything tastes like sausage. And a
lot of people don't know what roger Woods are, Like
DM must if y'all know what a roger Wood sausage is,
because then here and Charlotte I talk about roger Woods,
they'd be like, what's that? How the fuck y'all don't
know what a roger Wood is. Y'all ain't had a
(14:00):
sausage until you had a roger Wood period.
Speaker 1 (14:02):
Girl, I think you used to bust in the microwave.
Speaker 2 (14:05):
Oh not bust's say, it's been a minute since I
so so anything say everything sounds sexual sexual. I'm sorry.
Speaker 1 (14:17):
Growing up, if we didn't have roger Wood sausage, we
ain't have.
Speaker 2 (14:20):
Nothing to eat. We at least have yeah period.
Speaker 1 (14:27):
All right, y'all, listen, we are we've ended cuffing season essentially, right.
They say it ends uh begins in October sometime ends
around Valentine's Day and we in tax season now. So
is it a good time to start talking to your
bay about finances? If you guys have made it, you've.
Speaker 2 (14:45):
Been getting at Roger Wood, you talking about money yet
we're gonna talk about it when we come back.
Speaker 1 (14:55):
Before we get into the today's topic. Y'all. I saw
a white girl. She was saying she was on a podcast,
and she was talking about all the things she does
for he husband. She was like, I rub his head,
you know, she basically like caresses him like a baby
to put him to bed and shit like that. And
when he wakes up, she makes some coffee, she massages
his back like all of those are like that might
(15:16):
be his love language, like touch, touch. I don't see
what the big deal was. Like women was in the
comments like wow, anybody doing all that? But she may
just be talking about it verbally. But it's natural, right
when you love somebody, you rubbing them up. I rather
rub a nigga back to sleep like a baby than
they have to have sex every night. Nigga, I'm rubbing
this skin off.
Speaker 2 (15:37):
Your rubber too. But it's a sensory thing for me
because once I hit the weed, I'd be wanting something
to touch. So nigga here get rubbed.
Speaker 1 (15:46):
Like y'all ain't touching y'all, man, what's what's.
Speaker 2 (15:48):
Run with y'all? Yeah, I'm rub feet and everything has It's.
Speaker 1 (15:52):
Not my thing. Okay, No, I like to rub feet,
like with my feet, but like rub foot my hand.
Speaker 2 (15:58):
Oh no, I'm definitely giving my nigga fut message.
Speaker 1 (16:02):
I had that, not you trying to get that husband.
Speaker 2 (16:05):
I had that. It's all like a sensory thing for
me though, So it's don't even be about them seriously.
Speaker 1 (16:13):
All right, y'all, how do we start talking about money
and relationships? I mean, especially when you're about to maybe
perhaps cohabitate. I don't think we're doing the traditional way
of you know, being at your parents were old as
fuck now, is what I'm saying, speaker.
Speaker 2 (16:27):
So I'm not right.
Speaker 1 (16:28):
I'm not at my parents' house about to move in
with this man about to marry. We already passed that
order of things, right, So when is when is it
time or when is the appropriate time you think tam
to discuss finances when dating someone?
Speaker 2 (16:46):
I mean, as a younger, we passed dating right as
a girl. Shut up girl on the first day, let's
talk about it. It's like I'm joking, but I mean
that's how these young girls are. They talk about money
right out the gate, like if you're not paying to
play like they don't even want to talk to me.
I don't think that's right. Y'all need to calm down
(17:08):
with that, because y'all just gonna get somebody who only
got money and nothing else, and that's about everything else,
and that's low key broke. I know that sounds crazy
to y'all, Like he got all the money, but if
he ain't got nothing else, he still broke. Baby. I
had to learn that shit the hard way. So I
was in a beautiful place, miserable as fuck, with a
(17:30):
nigga who just had money. So trust me, that's not
all you want. But okay, when is the best time
to start talking about finances? I don't know, I think
see I feel like I know, like I don't exactly
know what a nigga got, but I know if a
nigga got some you know what I'm saying, Like I
(17:50):
don't just be out here like I can't tell if
he's poor or not. Right, So when we're discussing like
joint finances is when we start talking about living together,
When we start talking about moving in, I think that's
when you start talking about like do you expect me
(18:15):
to pay for shit? Like that's that's what and I
think I would go into it like I don't want
to pay. I don't want to pay for nothing. I'm
gonna just tell you that, right, I don't want to
pay for nothing, but I am willing to contribute in
some type of way, Like I'll pay the cable bill,
(18:35):
I'll pay the Wi Fi, I'll pay for my gas
in my car, payment in my cell phone bill. So
you don't want to pay for any living experience. I'll
pay for groceries. I don't want to pay no rent.
I don't want to pay no mortgage. I don't want
to pay no leads. I don't want to pay none
of that. No, I don't.
Speaker 1 (18:53):
Think I think the ideal like situation, right, we would
love would be like the woman moving into a man's home.
But we know oftentimes women owning homes more than men.
So the man is moving in which I don't think
any man should want to do that. You should probably
try to have your own and have the woman moving
(19:14):
with you. Right, You've already been fitting the bills in
your space, so adding a woman in there, there's intrinsic
value that women come with. Right, So like say, for instance,
you're a business owner, like I may not pay like
bills in the house, but somehow, because I'm here, existing
and breathing and nourishing you, your business has now explanged tenfold. Yeah,
(19:37):
this is what women bring should bring A good woman, right,
should bring to the table to where you're not concerned
about what she's actually paying for financially, right.
Speaker 2 (19:48):
Yeah, but that may not be the case for everybody.
Like some people are not going to you know, some people,
men and women included, are getting into relationships to lighting
a load on both of them.
Speaker 3 (19:59):
You know.
Speaker 2 (19:59):
So if you do go, if.
Speaker 3 (20:03):
You do here, present the fuck.
Speaker 2 (20:08):
Whatever works. Okay, whatever works.
Speaker 1 (20:12):
But I think that I don't think I've ever sat
down with a man, even when I was engaged about
to get married. I think I was kind of like
just being with somebody for a while, you kind of
know what their financial situation is, you know what I'm saying.
I had the good credit, this nigga old a bunch
of taxes, like I kind of knew what the fuck
going going on. Yeah, and then eventually like we're gonna
(20:35):
figure this shit out. I'm gonna go get get us
a business loan. All this shit, We're gonna pay that
shit down, Like we were trying to work together in a way.
But even even a situation like that can become like damn,
why you don't got this shit to get together on.
Speaker 2 (20:47):
Your own without me?
Speaker 1 (20:49):
It could start to feel like that, like why are
you depending on me to do this this thing that
you should have been this?
Speaker 2 (20:55):
Yeah, like I had I was dating this guy and
I liked him a lot, but and he was you know,
he had money or whatever, he was doing well for himself,
but he gambled. He had a very very bad gambling
habit like that that year during the football season. I
think he lost well over fifty thousand dollars gambling. And
(21:16):
that was like a yeah, I ain't gone into this, Nancy.
Speaker 1 (21:20):
That's the type of things you need to find out
when you ask about finances, because if somebody somebody, people
can appear to have things together, but then when you
actually get into the real action potatoes, you realize like, yeah,
he might look like he got shit going on, but
he's really in debt or he's living off credit, which
is okay, right, But if you have some liquid cash somewhere.
Speaker 2 (21:43):
Right, something so okay, how would you approach it?
Speaker 1 (21:46):
Like I don't talking about finances politics religion. They're all
like very touchy subjects, and especially.
Speaker 2 (21:58):
For men, men are very like they value their money
the way we value our bodies. So it's kind of like,
are you trying to take my virginity? That's how a
nigga with his money.
Speaker 1 (22:10):
What I would tell men and women listen, just put
your expectations out on the table. They won't really you
know what I'm saying, So people can get the fuck
on through if it's something that they don't want to
deal with. So I'm not saying the very first date,
you should be trying to see how much money this
man got. You can kind of get.
Speaker 2 (22:24):
An idea.
Speaker 1 (22:27):
Based on his lifestyle, how he lives, his social status,
like who he knows, you.
Speaker 2 (22:33):
Know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (22:34):
You can kind of gauge what type of man you're
dealing with without as actually asking him how much money
you got, unless you're now.
Speaker 2 (22:41):
In Atlanta, because them niggas is boo but for nesser
central goods. Damn, Like these niggas be like, yeah, I
live downtown and then it'd be like seven of them
in a high rise apartment or he only.
Speaker 1 (22:54):
Courting you to steal your social s down there in Atlanta.
But listen, remember Jim Bay, Remember the nigga from the
gym I told y'all was fucking with one. So he
was like actively, well, I don't know if it was
just he wanted me to do this thing or he
was actively looking for somebody to basically be in a
(23:14):
poly relationship with. And I'm like, listen, I don't like women,
and he wanted like somebody to move into his home.
I'm like, I don't like women, right, And then if
I did like women, who's to say I'm gonna like
your bitch in particular?
Speaker 2 (23:26):
Right right?
Speaker 1 (23:28):
And on top of that, I'm like, well, how much
money you got for a situation like this? He was like,
I got I got about three hundred thousand in the bank.
I don't think that's enough to take care of two
women and all the shit that you want to that's
not a bad starter help you financially. I feel like
he wants two women to help him get to the
next level.
Speaker 2 (23:47):
Well, I think if you in that, y'all all should
be helping in some type of way, right. You can't
just have two bitches laying around the house.
Speaker 1 (23:58):
I'm not moving in Listen. Even if I was down
with some type of poly situation. I'm not moving into
a house with another woman like your your fucking nuts.
When white men or other men do these type of things,
they yeah, everybody got their own house. I'm not about
to be in the house with you and another woman like,
you're nuts. You can't afford this situation. That's what I'm saying.
(24:18):
Three hundred thousand dollars.
Speaker 2 (24:20):
Two grown women can't live in the house together unless
they are also intimate with each other. I think they
have this. Yeah, they have to be in love with
each other too. And Susan period sink of bitch is
gonna be scrapping. He might be the one getting beat.
(24:42):
So I went on this website called elves dot com
and they have a list of things that you how
to get started with a conversation with your partner when
you're getting serious talking about money. So what it says is, uh,
here's a breakdown of what you two should share and discuss.
So you should first start with what each what are
(25:02):
each other's approaches to spending money. So this is a
good one to start with because it's about the day
to day stuff. What kinds of things do you think
are worth splurging on and saying before do you both
have a good idea of what you are coming in
with and what's going out? Do you track every penny?
Are you more of a fifty to thirty twenty kind
of person? Which one do you think you are? Track
(25:24):
every penny or fifty thirty twenty rule?
Speaker 1 (25:28):
Break that down?
Speaker 2 (25:29):
What does that really mean? So, okay, let's google it.
Speaker 1 (25:33):
I kind of I.
Speaker 2 (25:35):
Don't track every penny.
Speaker 1 (25:37):
I remember growing up and my mom would have her
checkbook register and she's writing down. We don't really have
to do that anymore because we have we have online banking, right,
but she'd write down everything she spent and have her
total at the bum. I definitely don't live that type
of life now. My older sister does because she was
really raised the longest with my mom. So she, even
(25:57):
though she has online banking, she stole rights out.
Speaker 2 (26:00):
Yeah, that's all just bad. That's when people use track
checking books, you know, so they just had everything written down.
The fifty to thirty twenty rule recommends putting fifty percent
of your money towards needs, thirty percent towards once, and
twenty percent towards savings. These saving categories also include money
you will need to realize your future goals. So that's
(26:21):
the fifty thirty twenty rule.
Speaker 1 (26:23):
Okay, so right now I'm definitely not doing twenty, but
I'm talking with a financial advisor trying to get my
life together for the future. So that's what I definitely invest,
but I probably spend more money than I invest at
this point. I make money off and off my investments,
(26:43):
but I be spending money, so I would say, I, no,
I don't do no fifty thirty twenty nothing. I'd be
swiping and then I'm scared to look at my account.
Speaker 2 (27:01):
I'd be avoiding.
Speaker 1 (27:02):
Logging into online binging, like I kind of got an
idea in my head and what the number gonna be
when I log.
Speaker 2 (27:07):
In, I'm like, I'm a penny picture, Like I save everything.
I save everything. My mama said, I hold a dollar
so tight. The ego on that motherfucker be screaming.
Speaker 3 (27:25):
Don't want to spend everybody el shit, But.
Speaker 2 (27:34):
That just comes from a mindset of growing up with less.
I just want to hold onto everything I get. I
really definitely down to like the penny for everything, Like
I literally put everything in the savings and then have
to like pull from it sometimes because I don't want
to touch it.
Speaker 1 (27:51):
I kind of do the same thing, and not with
savings because you know, you ain't supposed to be withdrawing
from savings account that many times because then you end
up with a fee.
Speaker 2 (27:58):
Right, So I got multiple checking.
Speaker 1 (28:00):
I do certain things out of But yeah, I'll fuck
around and be swiping from all three accounts all day long,
like oh, this one might not have no money left,
and let me go hit this one like.
Speaker 2 (28:11):
Wilin, No baby, I'm definitely in the grocery store if
it's a packaged chicken and eight is one for eight
sixty five, and there's one for eight sixty three.
Speaker 1 (28:22):
But that's savings, right, So you're looking for a deal always,
I'm definitely Yeah, me too. That's not really like uh
as far as keeping your finances in order though, because bitch,
you be looking at them chicken, but I know you
just have food delivered that you could have win and gotten.
Yeah I did so, saving a penny on a pack
of chicken, But you're paying these extra fees for Uber
(28:44):
Eats doesn't make sense.
Speaker 2 (28:45):
I need. I'll definitely be door dashing.
Speaker 1 (28:48):
Yeah, y'all tripping with that door dash it y'all are tripping,
go get your food. If you're trying to save money,
start there. If you are trying to like course correct
your finances, start at all the luxuries that these people
have created to get your coin.
Speaker 2 (29:02):
The girl, that's why I work hard, so I cannot
some things I'm not gonna give up, And that's a
door dawsh ever rebound again. All right. So the next
one is how do you each feel about your finances
at the moment? Like who has debt and if so,
are you working on paying it off? Some people manage
to avoid debt their whole lives, but most don't, and
(29:23):
paying it off has a big impact on how much
of your income is left for saving and spending. Discuss
what kinds of debt you each have student loans, car loans,
credit cards, et cetera, and what their balance and interest
rates are. Do they have an emergency fund just in case?
It might be a good to ask about their credit score.
People get very sensitive about their credit score, But.
Speaker 1 (29:43):
If you have a good one, you always bragging.
Speaker 2 (29:46):
But if you don't, you don't be like you asked
me all kind of personal shit.
Speaker 1 (29:52):
Like I'm not bragging on my credit score.
Speaker 2 (29:54):
Right now. But the thing is, I don't really care
about credit.
Speaker 1 (29:57):
I'm more like Glorella when she said I'm not fucked up,
but no credit score might be rich them all, and
I know how to beef my credit score up overnight,
so I'm never concerned about the credit score ship. But
the motherfucker taxes. When somebody mentioned taxes, like I get offended.
Speaker 3 (30:13):
Like why who are you?
Speaker 2 (30:15):
Who sent you? Who sent you?
Speaker 1 (30:18):
Like a nigga in a DM if he say he
worked for like any of the letters like why are
you here?
Speaker 2 (30:24):
Are you looking for me?
Speaker 1 (30:25):
Because they have a lot of creative ways to find
people that old taxes.
Speaker 2 (30:28):
My thing is, I just got mad when I started
becoming people who had the people who had to pay
taxes versus getting my check. I've always been there. Oh
what the hell? Why am I paying? I never got
big checks because I didn't have no kids, right, but
I done got like an eight three dollars check one
year now, bitch, don't get nothing I owe every time.
(30:49):
I hate that.
Speaker 1 (30:51):
The only time I've never not paid taxes is when
I'm doing some finiggling and claim somebody's kid. Other than that,
I always even when you were yard, I made more
money when I was younger, like bitch was balling in
her twenties. Like, I always paid fucking taxes unless I
had like a dependent to kind of offset the amount
(31:11):
of taxes I had to pay.
Speaker 2 (31:12):
But I've never gotten no stupid checks from taxing. I
never gotten read. I think I got like like a
student credit or some sort, like when I was in
college and got a couple dollars back, But I never
got no big checks.
Speaker 1 (31:25):
Yeah, like people with kids or people who would just
be doing the most filing all these kids elderly any taxes.
Speaker 2 (31:37):
The next one is what are your short term money plans?
Here's where you can go and feel for where you're
headed together over the next year or so. Do they
have plans to get the debt paid off? Do they
want to build an emergency fund? Do they want to
change jobs anytime soon? Are you currently saving for retirement?
Things like that. I definitely have a retirement fund. Yeah.
(32:02):
We don't have these conversations enough. You know, no, and
I don't think so, but I think that.
Speaker 1 (32:07):
Okay, if you're dating someone seriously, y'all now pass courting.
You're in a relationship and you're talking about finances, I
would think that, like, y'all need to be calculating the
price of an engagement ring too. But are you expecting
this other person to contribute to the things that you
have or are you there just to counsel them into
how to pay their debt off?
Speaker 2 (32:25):
Or like what are we doing?
Speaker 1 (32:27):
Like could this be a maybe you're walking away after
this conversation? Damn right, because nigga, I can't help you
too far at debt.
Speaker 2 (32:36):
I was dating this guy that I really liked, y'all,
I really liked him, Like everything was phenomenal. We got along,
he seemed to be he had a business, you know,
he had on his own store, and we were talking
about you know, he told me he had a daughter,
and we talked about the daughter, and then somewhere randomly
the conversation said, he came up and said he had
a son that lived thirty minutes away that I had
(32:59):
never heard nothing about. And we had been kicking it
for months. I was like, well, what's up with this son?
He was like if I don't know what's up with him?
And he's like, if that little nigga want to know
me when he gets big, he can come find me immediately.
My Cuchie dried up like the Sahara Desert prairie dars
(33:20):
start running past. It was like I heard Little House
of the Prairie thee music. That's how dry my coochie
got and I had to get up out of there
like immediately. That made me leave him alone, even though
I liked everything about him. But if you're somebody who
can say that about your own son who's thirty minutes away,
ain't nothing for me and you baby, nothing.
Speaker 1 (33:39):
So I mean kids are something that need to be
discussed during the finance time. Absolutely, you have back child support.
I told you just before. Like I used to work
at a pink like customer service so people would be
It was so many women black and white, okay, and
everybody else in between call and crying about how the
(34:00):
government has now garnished their taxes because their husband owed
back child support. So now my money's gone for the
kids we have together or for my kids. But you
had a joint bank account bank account with this person,
so yeah, do you have back child support? Okay, y'all
niggas can act like y'all don't give a damn about
a woman's income or her her her having a degree
(34:21):
or not when half y'all need help.
Speaker 2 (34:24):
With paying child support.
Speaker 3 (34:27):
Apparently, so yeah, children, that's not true.
Speaker 2 (34:30):
A j don't do that to do some of them.
Speaker 1 (34:33):
Girl, at a lot of them need help. I'm ashamed
to say this. My best friend has a child for
my second cousin.
Speaker 2 (34:43):
She took him to.
Speaker 1 (34:43):
Court because he was talking shit to her daughter, saying
like how much money he pays in child the whole time.
Speaker 3 (34:50):
Girls, she don't care.
Speaker 1 (34:51):
Whole time he was back, he had money, like back
child support he hadn't paid, but you brag into the
daughter about how much money you pay a child's for.
Speaker 2 (35:00):
Girl.
Speaker 1 (35:00):
They got in front of the judge and he was
like no in a super geechee voices. Imagine this man,
she got money, look at her.
Speaker 2 (35:09):
What does that have to do with anything? Nothing?
Speaker 1 (35:11):
Because at what point do you think you're not supposed
to be contributing at all?
Speaker 2 (35:16):
Right? You know two things for your child? Absolutely, I
need to.
Speaker 1 (35:20):
Know if you're on child' support. I need to know
how you how you take care of your kids. I
need to know that. Also, you know, at this age,
younger people maybe they don't have any kids. It's not
a topic that would come out when talking about finances.
Speaker 2 (35:33):
But yeah, if you're older, that's a conversation now. And
then the last one, what are your dreams for the future?
Are you working on it? This is the fun part.
Do you want to buy a home in a few years?
What do you dream about when you dream about retirement? Like,
that's the things that you can talk about. Putting those
things out on the table now will help you each
understand why the other person may be making today's financial
(35:55):
choices and gives you the opportunity to maybe even sync
up your plans once you're ready. That's dope. I Ideally,
for me, I would want to be in a relationship
where my man's money pays the bills and my money
creates the investments for us.
Speaker 1 (36:13):
That's entertainment some type of way. Yeah, like my maybe
my money is for entertainment. If we do our vacations,
all that we can have fly ash vacations. If I've
been saving all year for this thing.
Speaker 2 (36:23):
Now, I feel like, yeah, vacations, but also building new
streams of income. That's what my money is gonna do.
That's ideally how I would want our relationship to go.
Speaker 1 (36:32):
You know a lot of times people look at stay
at home moms. Oh, they're not contributing financially, but a
lot of them have like side hustles, online jobs, things
that they're doing from the house that may be making
more money. Like look at the TikTokers, right, Okay, it's
this one girl I'd be following on Instagram. She's a model,
sores or husband. They'd be making fun of her ass
(36:55):
on TikTok so bad. She's cooking. So she's cooking pregnant.
I mean she's making peanut butter and jelly sandwiches from scratch.
Bitch seeing her y baking the bread like, that's all content.
And she has over a million followers and she's making
money doing day to day life. We just had Lexi
(37:15):
your homegirl in here. Like people, you can literally make
money off of being a homemaker now.
Speaker 2 (37:20):
Right at this, As long as you got the right
camera angles, you can get a check.
Speaker 3 (37:25):
Right.
Speaker 1 (37:26):
So yeah, Like women with a lot of stay at
home moms have found a way to create online businesses
and they are driven into their households.
Speaker 2 (37:34):
All the time. Right, I agree.
Speaker 1 (37:36):
So I'm going to get a whiteboard and I'm going
to put up all my goals and my partner's goals
and we're going to execute things together. Like two people
is always better than me, right, always, especially when I
come to some money too many times two moneies.
Speaker 2 (37:53):
So however I'm making money, I always be telling bitches
where they got their man and they living in the house.
I'll be like, girl, I am in a single income home. Okay, relax,
don't tell me I gotta bring you no birthday gift.
I was gonna bring one, but I have a single
income home to relax.
Speaker 1 (38:14):
So I would say, talk about money often and soon. Yeah,
if you're planning on, like really being with this person,
because it's important.
Speaker 2 (38:22):
But that don't mean begging because some people get that wrong.
Speaker 1 (38:26):
Yeah, people be in bad moods when they when they
money fucked up. Right, So you don't want to be
in a relationship with somebody you didn't You didn't realize
this nigga was fucked up financially. Not a relationship is
going or this woman. Yeah, yeah, I will never be
considering women when I talk about money.
Speaker 2 (38:46):
I'm not talking about us. But don't know, man, want
to meet a woman, think she's great. The first conversation
she's like, hey, you're like, what's wrong with you? I
don't really want to talk about it. Don't tell me
what's that? Baby, what's wrong? I'm just saying, okay, well,
(39:07):
since you asks, I just I just have some debt
right now, and I just don't know how they're gonna
they're gonna put me out. I'm and get a victim
from my high rise apartment if somebody does not pay
this one for me, Like don Ni, No nigga wants
to hear that right out the gate.
Speaker 1 (39:23):
But if you're trying to get rid of him, go
ahead and do that, because either he gonna give you
the money or you're gonna get the fuck on through.
Speaker 3 (39:29):
Either way it's a win win.
Speaker 2 (39:30):
But yeah, I wouldn't.
Speaker 1 (39:32):
We're not talking not necessarily.
Speaker 2 (39:34):
Because you might run off a good guy because you just,
you know, coming out the gate telling him what you need.
You know, That's what I said.
Speaker 1 (39:41):
Unless you want to, unless your your your intention is
to get rid of him, don't do that right yeah,
because men will get lost if they think you're trying
to get in their purse real quick. Okay, But I mean,
I'm talking about my finances too, you're talking about yours.
We're trying to see how we fit in each other's life.
Financially because like it or not, on this realm. Okay,
(40:04):
you need money to live. We can't get around it. Right,
So y'all mad when somebody say, oh, I make he
makes thirty forty thousand dollars a year, or you have
two hundred dollars the date is one ninety five, but
your man only has such and such.
Speaker 2 (40:19):
How much you're paying?
Speaker 1 (40:20):
Like, what are we talking about? Okay, we need money
to breathe. At this point, air costs two dollars to
put gap to put air in the tire at the pumps,
So what are we talking about? So it's an important
conversation and you need to find out early as possible.
Speaker 2 (40:34):
You don't want to get in a relationship with.
Speaker 1 (40:36):
Somebody who has fucking people looking for him because he
owes fifty million dollars to MGM Studio like Bruno Mars.
Bruno Mars, they say they own him. Somebody said that
MGM Studios' excuse me, MGM Casino, not Studios. Casino owns
(40:58):
Bruno Mars because he is in debt to them from
his gambling habits.
Speaker 2 (41:02):
Yeah, yeah, that's what That's why I said I couldn't
talk to that guy because he was successful, but his
gambling habit was out of control.
Speaker 1 (41:08):
I can't do it and one wrong move, shit can
go south.
Speaker 2 (41:11):
This nigga had me down. Download and uh, what's that
sports bet and shit talking about? They're giving away a
free two hundred and fifty Go ahead and put it
on your phone. What I don't Okay.
Speaker 1 (41:24):
He sounds like he was already in debt and he
just was balancing his debt and he was managing debt
is what he sounds like.
Speaker 2 (41:30):
He was in sports betting.
Speaker 1 (41:32):
Mm hmm.
Speaker 2 (41:33):
Yeah. So I had to go. I had to exit
stage left, baby, because you're gonna have it. You could
build something great with someone and they gamble it all
the way. You got time for that. Get at it there,
So old, let me just say this. I know this
is kind of like off topic. I mean it's on topic,
but I used to work when I was living in Europe.
(41:53):
I used to work at this. Uh it was a
club and it had like, uh, the machines, the poker
machines like they had. Yeah, they had like a whole
section of slot machines and roulette and all kind of
stuff like that, right, And these people used to come
in there and they be on the machines all day long,
just feed and money into that machine. And this one
(42:15):
man he did not want to leave his machine because
he said it was getting hot, whatever that meaning. And
he doodooed on himself. He shipped his pants trying not
to lead a machine. Yeah, that's how bad it was.
And then they gonna tell me I got to go
in there to clean up. I said, I bet you
the fuck I won't. I bet you the fuck I won't.
(42:37):
I bet you I quit this motherfucker before I go
in there and clean up. No doodo out, no chair,
You'll find somebody else to do it.
Speaker 1 (42:43):
They throw that chair in the trash. What.
Speaker 2 (42:46):
I'm a bartender, that's it. I came here to make drinks.
That's whole casino funk his hell because this man couldn't
get up from that machine. On that note, yes, get
your finances in order.
Speaker 1 (43:06):
Yeah, talk about it. It's all about the Benjamin's baby period.
Talk about the money you got to it's a must.
You do want to end up in a bad situation.
That's your last last Yes, bitch, it's all about the Benjamins.
Speaker 2 (43:21):
My last last is you want a nigga to trick
on your trick first. It's like real gold niggas definitely
trick first.
Speaker 3 (43:30):
Somebody a little trinkt a little nice little.
Speaker 1 (43:34):
Because nine times out ten, nobody's ever done anything nice
for him, Like niggas don't get flowers.
Speaker 2 (43:39):
Yeah, but not that. Don't say that. I say that,
but don't do it because you are looking for something
in return. Do it because you actually care about this nigga.
You want to see him smile. And usually when you
treat somebody good, they'll treat you good in return. That's
my last last Yeah, okay, y'all.
Speaker 1 (43:54):
So if you enjoyed this episode, y'all tune in every
Thursday on The Black Effect podcast iHeartRadio app or over
the Fuck you get your podcast at.
Speaker 2 (44:02):
This is your co host, aj Holiday two point zero
on instagrams. What's Up Tam y'all is official Tambama on Instagram.
Y'all follow me like, y'all. We got ninety four days
till summer. I'm down twenty three pounds, y'all. If y'all
trying to get skinny with me, I'm doing urbal life.
Y'all can do it with me.
Speaker 1 (44:21):
Oh, y'all, I'm trying to get skinny with you fuck
the rest of them.
Speaker 2 (44:23):
Okay, I said, come on you, I'll send you some
samples and all kind of good shit if you want
me to. I'll put it in the mail to you girl.
But y'all, y'all can order it. The link is on
my page and the links on my DM. If you
do order something, I'll add you to my close friends
and we can have this conversation going and get fine together.
Some of it is coming. Let's not play, that's all
I'm gonna tell y'all. Y'all, don't be big backed to
(44:46):
on the boat. I mean, if you are, that's cool too,
But if you don't want to be, join me. Y'all.
I love y'all. Remember to speak now and never hold
your piece or your back.
Speaker 1 (44:58):
Fast a tattoo on my backpat ask me if I care.
Bye deuces. For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app,
Apple podcast, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
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