Peri Who? feat. Dr. Kelly Elmore

In this episode of We Talk Back, AJ Holiday and TamBam sit down with Dr. Kelly Elmore for a candid and educational discussion about perimenopause and menopause—two stages of women’s health that are often misunderstood and overlooked. Dr. Elmore breaks down the myths surrounding menopause, highlighting the benefits and risks of hormone replacement therapy (HRT) and the crucial role of lifestyle choices in navigating this transition.

They explore the impact of stress, nutrition, and intentional fitness on hormonal balance, as well as the importance of community support and open dialogue among women. Dr. Elmore shares her personal journey into medicine and emphasizes the need for proactive, holistic health care as women age. Together, they stress the importance of educating future generations about women’s health, empowering listeners to embrace menopause not as an ending, but as a powerful new phase of womanhood. 

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hey, everybody, it's doctor Kelly om Z and I'm on
We Talked Back Podcast. I can't wait for you to
hear us talk about perimenopause and menopause. We're gonna give
you some real information so that you can keep it wet,
clean and fantastic through your forties and fifties.

Speaker 2 (00:17):
Welcome to We talk Back Podcast, the production of iHeartRadio
and the Black Effect Network Talk Talk.

Speaker 1 (00:26):
We're just two unapologetically black women with an opinion. Who
talks back. What's up, y'all? It's your girl, a j Holiday,
what's up? Tam Bam? Hey y'all, it's Beet Tam Vam.
I love y'all so so very much, and I'm glad
y'all came back. I'm miss Jake. How was your weekend?

Speaker 2 (00:47):
How your weekend? Probably be in their car. They probably
be in their car like AJ Gonna says, Tamgo sad age,
and then tam Go say, how is your weekend? They
saying it with you like and then.

Speaker 1 (01:00):
A Gonna say, i'd eventful, I ain't do mind that thing.
I went to cost Co.

Speaker 2 (01:06):
I definitely went to Costco. Definitely went to TJ Max
and my super bright light skinned homegirl who's been in
town since. I was like, I don't know, twelve came
by this weekend, so I ain't too much, just chilling
and being grateful. I did go see my mom. I

(01:27):
hung out with her a little bit on Sunday. I
know she loves it when I come sit over there
line your whole day be gone. But I don't know this.
I worked out a little bit and that's about it.
I ain't too much this weekend for real. I really
just relaxed and chilled.

Speaker 1 (01:45):
I was just working. It's that time of year where
I'm busy, you know, Thank you Jesus. So I've just
been working. I had nothing eventful happened. Oh no, I lie.
I went to you always.

Speaker 2 (02:00):
It's like.

Speaker 1 (02:02):
I went to a my teeth lived white as hell.
I think it's that.

Speaker 2 (02:05):
I was just about to say that bitch, like, what
the fuck, nop, he's super white.

Speaker 1 (02:11):
It's the I think it's the light. I don't know,
but anyway, I went to this new spot in Charlotte
called Astra Mediterranean something lounge, and it was like one
of those it was like a halal place, but it
had the hookah and it's loud. It was good. You know.
They didn't have an alcohol, but I don't want none

(02:32):
of that anyway. And I had some food and it
was nice. And then I went to Crave and Dessert
Bar and I got a That's one of my favorite
spots in Charlotte. I still love Crave. Yes, just consistent, yeah,
consistent quality. And I had like a little hookah little
cocktail and uh, carrot cake cupcake. Yes, and that was it.

Speaker 2 (02:54):
That was We don't eat the bread pudding from there.
I'm not a bread pudding girly girl. Yeah, I've never
had bread putting out that I think about it.

Speaker 1 (03:05):
Oh, you tripping when I tell you.

Speaker 2 (03:07):
Me and Basilicia just go there for the bread pudding
because they give you you know, it's like a little
little saucer and a rampkin. That's what they call it,
a little ramkin. And they have like the ramikan and
they have the like the frosty sauce, you know, the
white shit. What is it called iced? I used to
have like icing, yeah, like a little thing on the side. Oh,

(03:28):
I'm not a super duper uh what is this ship?
Bread pudding girly, But I did grow up off a
bread pudding. And they have a very very very very
good bread pudding. If they still have it on the menu,
you should try it next time.

Speaker 1 (03:40):
I'll try it. I've never had bread pudding. Always associated
bread pudding and fruitcake. It's the same thing, like forge.

Speaker 2 (03:49):
Yeah, it's just theirs is really good.

Speaker 1 (03:52):
Like so old hot food.

Speaker 2 (03:55):
It is old people food, because old people when like
the bread is about to get old, they just turn
that shit into bread, right. Our French toast, French TOAs
have a little mold on it, old ass bread.

Speaker 1 (04:09):
So, yeah, that was it sounds fun.

Speaker 2 (04:12):
Let's get in the sin, y'all. So Paul Pears says
the only way to really know if a girl loves
you is a cheat on her and see how she reacts.
So is this his podcast? I don't know. I don't

(04:32):
think so. I mean, Paul Parris is one of the
biggest basketball players all time, right, and he's on this
Truth after Dark podcast, and he sparked a lot of
backlash by claiming that the only authentic way to determine
if a woman truly loves you is the cheat on
her and observe her reaction. He suggested that loyalty in
the aftermath of infidelity proves devotion that is disgusting. And

(04:58):
I think a lot of us, a lot of women,
and I have really been thinking, like, you know, if
you you go through some shit in and stay stated
down ass woman like, he's gonna choose you type mentality.
Absolutely not. I ain't never been a dumb bitch in
that way. I definitely have dealt with infidelity and relationships
only really because it's just human nature. Like, but I

(05:21):
don't recognize now I don't have to.

Speaker 1 (05:23):
Yeah, does sound crazy, Like what in the hell?

Speaker 2 (05:27):
Don't test me because you're gonna fail every fucking time married.
I don't know. It's p paris married.

Speaker 1 (05:33):
He can't be married.

Speaker 2 (05:34):
The type of shit he be talking in there, talking
about it, get it, get a live or seven if
you are okay. The worst part is these are old
farts talking like this. These are old ass fucking men
like you know. And then he said the best way
to see if a girl loves you. That's the problem

(05:55):
right there, y'all fucking with girls.

Speaker 1 (05:57):
Girls are not grown.

Speaker 2 (06:00):
By a woman. Okay, because women be making niggas cry. Okay,
because I'm gonna make you cry.

Speaker 1 (06:07):
I'm gonna break Christmas thing. I'm getting the fun up
out of there.

Speaker 2 (06:10):
It's so toxic, really is So basically you want to
hurt the person you say you love because that's what
you're doing, right to see if they love you.

Speaker 1 (06:20):
That's weird. Yeah, you don't love her, You don't love her. Advice,
don't listen to that nigga. You go find yourself alone.

Speaker 2 (06:31):
Yeah, and also you're not a millionaire, okay, so don't look.
Don't listen to a ball and ass baller.

Speaker 1 (06:37):
Right.

Speaker 2 (06:37):
The type of should he be doing, y'all, not the
same what you're going to.

Speaker 1 (06:41):
Lose because she loved him. She might stay because it's
comfortable exactly like.

Speaker 2 (06:47):
Her her uh, her lifestyle is just completely different. Right,
So you're trying to compare ourselves to Beyonce and jay
Z relationship when we use the relationships with y'all and niggas, right,
So don't be this is But the thing is is
that he doesn't say anything that I don't think that

(07:10):
men already think. Right, he's just saying the things out
loud because I really I remember when I broke up
with my ex most recently, like leading up to it,
he was like, we ain't supposed to break up, Like
he mentioned his other friends right, and how they went
through all these things and she stayed like I've already
went through things and stayed I don't feel like going

(07:32):
through anything else. Nigga, you putting me out? Are you dumb?
She's dumb.

Speaker 1 (07:37):
You've reached the quota, nigga, like you way past the.

Speaker 2 (07:41):
Threshold of bullshit. And my tolerance for bullshit is so
fucking high because I just understand human nature, you know
what I'm saying. And I'm not a fucking loser. So
even in relationships, I'm gonna try my fucking best. But
at what point do you think you can can discontinuously
be disloyal and a relationship and the woman is supposed

(08:01):
to keep you and stay like bitch, just get tired
right here. And the thing is that I don't never
think I can't do better. I can do comparable to
you or greater every.

Speaker 1 (08:12):
Time, every single time.

Speaker 2 (08:14):
Yeah, So I think women just gotta up they self esteem. Man,
Get the fuck up out of there. Whether he got
money or not, get your own bag.

Speaker 1 (08:22):
All right, that part, all right? Listen to this, Listen
to this. A wanted man in Ohio sent the police
a selfie after seeing his photo on the news. Because
he didn't like how I look and it wasn't the
most flattering picture of hearing y'all. So a man in
Ohio made headlines after sending police a selfie because he

(08:42):
didn't like the muck shots shown on the news. Identified
as Donald Pugh, he was wanted for skipping a court
appearance and linked to other cases like arson and vandalism.
He even emailed the police saying his muck shot was
terrible and offered a better photo of himself wearing sunglasses
in the car. Police think for being helpful, but reminded
him to rather see him in person to discuss his charges.

(09:05):
History quickly with viral proven that crime and vanity don't
mix well.

Speaker 2 (09:09):
But as he in jail, though, the nigga saw himself
in the news. All y'all got me fucked up here, And.

Speaker 1 (09:20):
The photo, y'all, the photo that he seeing is much better.
It's a better undil hate nas police. They know they
could have picked a better picture than that, right, They
trying to make me look like a hardened criminal, right.

Speaker 2 (09:35):
He probably he definitely probably wanted for some scamming shit, okay.

Speaker 1 (09:39):
To be like mentally ill to do this right or
not give a fuck.

Speaker 2 (09:44):
You know, he's just having fun, Like I'm gonna go
to jail anyway, man, Let me just might as well.

Speaker 1 (09:47):
Look joy my time.

Speaker 2 (09:50):
I'm a what two chain song fresh his head when
the fans comes, head, when the fans come, That's what
he was doing.

Speaker 1 (10:01):
This nigga. I know he from young Town, Ohio. He's
got to be.

Speaker 2 (10:05):
I thought he was from Harlem.

Speaker 1 (10:06):
No oh hi, oh yeah. They're flashing people too and her.

Speaker 2 (10:11):
Yeah, don't take no fuck up picture of me, y'all.
So remember last week we were talking about and I
know you've probably seen it now, this black woman I
think they were in.

Speaker 1 (10:21):
Was it Ohio? California? Might have been California. That's happened
at a Golden gym, Tish Hyman.

Speaker 2 (10:26):
She accused this man of exposing himself essentially in the
woman's locker room, and he says he's a transgender woman
and he belongs in a women's locker room. The gem
ultimately kicked her out, the woman Tish Hyman, and basically
canceled her membership after she, you know, was yelling in
the middle of the of the goals gym, like what

(10:47):
the fuck is wroman?

Speaker 1 (10:48):
Y'all?

Speaker 2 (10:48):
It's a grown man in the bathroom. But this week, y'all,
apparently this same man transgender person accused of exposing himself
in women's locker room was convicted of brutally beating his
ex wife.

Speaker 1 (10:59):
Before take get her Name?

Speaker 2 (11:01):
Okay, so Tiss was not wrong for calling his ass out.
And first of all, when are you going to transition?
When are you gonna actually transition? When are you gonna
cut that dick off? Okay?

Speaker 1 (11:13):
Because if you still got it, you got a transition,
because can you can you be called trans if you
still have your uh birth parts?

Speaker 2 (11:22):
That's what I'm saying. Like to me, I thought that
trans meaning the woman or the man has transitioned, transitioned
into the other sex by way of the sex change.
If there hasn't been a sex change, and there hasn't
been a legal name change, and this person just can
pull up and female women's spaces, that's a problem because
I don't think any trans man is pulling up in

(11:44):
the men's restroom, right, So this is just men trying
to DeBow women's spaces. And again from last week, a Tiss,
she's a she's a lesbian woman, right, So the transider person, yeah,
it happened in Los Angeles bathroom. Now being convicted of
so his now ex wife while living in Ohio as
a man before taking the victim's name as their own.

Speaker 1 (12:08):
Alex Black ran a file of.

Speaker 2 (12:13):
Women, ran a foul ran a file of women at
a gym in Beverly Hills, including singer songwriter Tis Hymen,
who accused them of exposing himself and harassing her in
the locker room. You could just see him pulling up
in there like he's supposed to be in there.

Speaker 1 (12:32):
See, this is why I don't like that. And from
the pictures he didn't. And this is where I feel
like it's a slippery soap, because slope because he didn't
look like he was trying to identify as a woman
for real to me, because he didn't. He looked like
a man with earrings. Song. That was it. But then

(12:55):
I know women who look like men with earrings? Song?
So how do you no? I trying to be funny.
I mean it like that, you know, Like, so how
do you say, like, this person isn't trends or how
you say this person isn't like how do you determine that?
I don't even know.

Speaker 2 (13:14):
You determine it? By your genetic makeup. You were born
a man, I was born a woman, okay, just because
you have slick back here with errings on and a
woman can also appear like that. Being a woman is
not about esthetic it's science. It is genetics.

Speaker 1 (13:32):
Okay.

Speaker 2 (13:33):
That's why even you know, at the doctor's office, they
still have like on a on your paperwork. You know,
they ask you. They want to be inclusive, right, so
they have all the things that in man where you,
but they ultimately ask were you born male or female?
That's we're not talking about what somebody look like. Yes,
there are definitely women that look like men, but genetically

(13:54):
there's still a woman and they belong in female spaces, right.
Women are not out here trying to vie. I feel
like that man just wants to see women naked and
he's doing it under the guise of being transgendered.

Speaker 1 (14:07):
Especially with the history of domestic violence against women and
the instilling identity mm hmmm. A lot of a lot
of those people, they're.

Speaker 2 (14:18):
Like mean, they are mean, and you know, like that
is a telltale sign that your man might be okay
on the down low. If he's mean to you, if
he's putting his hands on you. If he's being belligerent
and abusive towards you, they don't like you. They don't
like you, and oftentimes they might be battling their sexuality

(14:39):
and taking it out on you. How dare you get
to be a real woman? And you know, and they
are the main ones that are so upset and at
arms about men who can live freely, gay men, transgendered,
transen transgendered women who are out right don't give a
fuck with no nobody thinks about it. It's the d

(15:01):
L men that are dangerous. Those are the dangerous ones. Okay,
angry hold, let me add this on it, y'all. I'm sorry.
I've seen this postal Instagram. This girl she was like, uh,
somebody said that if your man farn a lot, he
might be del and I had to think. I had

(15:22):
to think back, Okay, big girl, bye, No, because the
bitches in the comments, listen, what's up with your what's
up with your gut?

Speaker 1 (15:36):
My guy?

Speaker 2 (15:36):
What is up with your uh your uh gastro system? Like,
what's going on? Why is your booty clapping so fucking much?
I'm girl all on One bitch commented and said she
was arguing with her ex husband and he had farnted
and she said, why the fuck your fart smell like lube?

(15:59):
I commented, that's mad. Damn, I'm so mad that I'll
fuck with niggas that I gotta violate like this anymore,
because I would definitely have that in the arsenal. Your
hearts smell like.

Speaker 1 (16:08):
Lube, that is ridiculous, That is asinine, I bet, while
your fart smell like loube is crazy. Y'all. We have
a guest on today, doctor Kelly. She is talking Perry
menopause and menopause with us. We'll be right back.

Speaker 2 (16:31):
You are crazy, all right, y'all. So today we're turning
up the heat, okay literally because we're talking Perry menopause.

Speaker 1 (16:47):
This is what tam, we want to talk about.

Speaker 2 (16:48):
And listen, we are not going through this phase yet, okay,
we just want to see what Okay.

Speaker 1 (16:55):
I'm not very sure. That's why I have questions, you know, because.

Speaker 2 (16:58):
Right because exactly so it's like that in between stage
and your body like we ain't done yet but definitely changing. Okay.
So today we have the incredible doctor Kelly Elmore. When
we talked back, she's a board certified OBG Y n
retired Navy captain. Okay see, she's the boss, cap you

(17:19):
get her and say okay right, and founder of Koe
Medical Consulting. She's dedicated to helping women lead, live, thrive
through every stage of life, including this one that me
and Tammy are not going through. Yeah, y'all, aren't we all?

Speaker 1 (17:37):
Aren't we all? Aren't y'all? Thank you for joining us, Darna, Kelly,
I really really appreciate you coming on talking to us
and our listeners. Absolutely, I'm I'm here for it. This
is what I love. I tell people I love what
I do, who I do it for, and who I
do it with. So that's my job. So tell us
how you got into because, like are y'all before the

(17:58):
show started, she says she was darting to Kelly since
she was six years old. So tell us about how
you got into becoming a doctor. Like your background. Well,
I tell people all the time I was called to
the pool pit of medicine. First, I want to say
thank you both for having me on your wonderful show.
I was gone to the pool pit of medicine very early.
I didn't have doctors in my immediate family. As a

(18:19):
matter of fact, I was the first one to go
and complete college, so you know, everything after that, I
was the first for that as well. But when I
was a little girl, I you know, something told me
in my spirit that I wanted to be a physician.
And then one day I was watching KPBS. I think
I might have been nine or ten years old, and
they were showing the first laparoscopic hiss directed me. My
mom walked through the door, like, what are you watching?

(18:40):
Because if you can imagine a woman is like in
a certain position having the surgery.

Speaker 2 (18:45):
Knew well.

Speaker 1 (18:45):
She was like, what are you watching? And I'm like,
a laparostopic hiss directed me and she was like, did
you what is that? And I said, well, that's what
I want to do. And I used to watch this
show called Heartbeat, which was all about obgyns, and I
was like, and that's what I want to do too. Wow.
So I decided that I wanted to, you know, be
the safe place for women, especially because I have a
history of domestic violence in my family, that I wanted

(19:07):
to be that safe place for women to express what's
going on not just with their bodies, but also spiritually, physically, financially, mental,
them emotionally, so when you come to me, we having
a full conversation. Right, Well, it's not like you a
servant of the Lord, because goodness, all right, I have
a question, all right, what's one myth about menopause you
wish women would stop believing one myth about menopause? Well,

(19:31):
this is an interesting question because right now they're actually
changing the FDA black box warning on hormone replacement therapy.
So a lot of people thought that they could not
utilize hormone replacement for the last twenty years due to
an article that came out or a study that came

(19:52):
out that told them, you know, it's going to kill them.
They're going to get more breast cancer, cardiovascular disease, all
that other stuff. So the myth is that more women
wo men are able to utilize supplements and or hormone
replacement therapy medications in order to help them navigate perimenopause
and menopause. So are for someone who like me, who's

(20:13):
like so far away from all of this perimenopause, can
you explain to me and our listeners what exactly is
menopause and perimenopause? Like, what is it? Because when I
love to start where so it's a change, right, and
I will tell you that if you live past the
A up to the age of sixty, you are going
to go through the change. Just like when you were born,

(20:35):
you went through adolescence, puberty, you're going through the change.
So perimenopause menopause is the change of our hormones. And
I like to start with menopause because it's just like
more of a definitive space before I get the definition
of perimenopause. So menopause is when our hormone levels estrogen
progesterone dropped to such significant lows that we no longer

(20:59):
have a periods, so we're not menstruating for twelve months. However,
there's more than fifty different symptoms that are associated with
having the drop in your estrogen progesterone and your tsosterone.
So menopause officially is twelve months without your period or cycle,
and then after that is what people call postmenopause. But

(21:22):
I also like to say one myth to people, menopause
lasts for your the rest of your life. That's the
that is the area you are in in your life
for the rest of your life. Once you stop having
your periods, you're in menopause. See I used to think
is like when you stop liking men men, know, pause
pause on these men because of you know, so.

Speaker 2 (21:46):
That's what you say that teenage years.

Speaker 1 (21:49):
So that's funny you say that because you know one
of the symptoms of the many symptoms is you can
have decreased libido, decreased desire. And I remember a few
of my friends to be like, oh my god, I
don't know what's happening. When they hit their forties, like forties,
was like, yes, baby, yes, they wanted to have sex,
the whole thing, right when you hit four and then
all of a sudden, all of that energy just like

(22:11):
he continues to wax and wane. And that's where we
call the perimenopause. So prior to you going through menopause,
which means you're not having periods anymore, the perimenopause is
that time before, and that time before can be anywhere
from five to ten years prior to your actual menopause.
Most people go through like the stage change that one

(22:32):
year between the ages of forty eight and fifty two, right,
but that time before that, that is that perimenopausal time.
And you know, a lot of people think about fertility right,
So their reproductive time, so that perimenopause you can still
get pregnant. Your hormones are just like doing this. Yeah,
so your hormones are doing this. And it's just like

(22:53):
I tell people, the way we start is the way
we end. So if you had puberty, if you remember puberty,
that's what mental pause is like as well. So that's
why I've never had a ZiT in my fucking life.
Excuse my French, but all of a sudden I got
zits on my jawline. Is that a symptom of perry? Perhaps? Yep?

(23:13):
Face So estrogen? So estrogen, the decrease in estrogen, progesterone, testosterone. Right,
Remember I told you there's fifty different symptoms or more
that people can have. Now, Estrogen is in the in
every part of our body, our skin, our hair, are
you know, our our brains, our heart, everywhere is estrogen. Okay,

(23:36):
So when you're starting to see things start happening. And
then also depending on what you're doing for your nutrition,
and I recommend people to eat what we call the
Viva life five fruits, vegetables, nuts, rains, beans, drinking our
water and if you eat meat that make sure it's
you know, high quality, as clean as possible. But if
you're if you are eating outside of those things, you're

(23:57):
going to see your body respond even more to having
this decrease in estrogen. So that is what is going around.
Your hormone levels are dropping and you are starting to
see the our bodies respond, our tissues respond, our organs
respond to that. Should we be taken like estrogen? Sorry,
So it is that is a very personal conversation. So

(24:18):
every single person should have that conversation with their provider
because we have to think about what's your family history,
what's your personal history, and there are certain things that
if you are active, like if you have active breast cancer, no,
we're not going to give you hormone replacement, right, we
may and sometimes we can do something local to the vagina,
but that's one of those things we have to have

(24:39):
that conversation about. If you have excessive i mean, excuse me,
uncontrolled hypertension, we have to have a conversation about that
because the cardiovascular risk could increase depending on what your
cardiovascular risks are. So it's not that it's a complete no,
but we have to have a conversation with you about
your personal history. In order to recommend. Now, hold on,

(25:00):
you said you could do something to the vagina, what
is it? Tighten it, make it more wet, like what
is it for? Shop for shop?

Speaker 2 (25:08):
So, as you know, your vagina is very like responsive
to estrogen, So the estrogen, collagen, the juiciness, all of that, right,
we need to make sure that we are able to
keep that, like you said, moisten wet, if.

Speaker 1 (25:21):
That's what you so choose and how you so choose
to use it. One thing I tell people, and this
is a I don't know if it's a mythory, Well
it's a truth on my basis. If you don't use it,
you will lose it, Okay.

Speaker 2 (25:31):
So the point of the matter is get worried about that.

Speaker 1 (25:38):
I'll go through like spirits. Well I don't.

Speaker 2 (25:40):
But and so what I say is if I use it,
I don't like you.

Speaker 1 (25:47):
We gotta make sure it's clean, healthy, and as wet
as you want it to be. Right. So that being said,
if you need to utilize a vaginal like moisturizer, you
can use that, right, So we have a placements for that.
We also can use vaginal estrogen locally so that you
can continue to keep that area like I said healthy

(26:08):
and moist because besides getting the itchy, scratchy vagina, as
long as you don't have any inflammation or infection associated
with it, you can also have what we call urinary
tract effect what seems like to be urinary tract infections,
and what we call that is the genital urinary syndrome
or symptoms of menopause perimenopause. And that's because those estrogen

(26:29):
levels are so low and it's dry, and now you're
getting all of these symptoms associated that seem like urinary
attract infections but may or may not be.

Speaker 2 (26:38):
You have all these things for like men libido, right,
So we have creams right like you're saying, but do
we have a viagraa type pill for women's libidos? Like
everything is catered to men prolonging their I don't know,
sexual sex.

Speaker 1 (26:56):
Yeah, so actually there are medications for women that help
them improve their libido, their sex drive also, like I said,
improve improve their vaginal moisture, the elasticity of your entire
body as far as your skin and everything like that.
So yeah, they're coming, they're on the market. They're not
talked about as much, but they are you know more

(27:17):
and more are coming out and especially, like I said,
we have this at you at the health and Human
services level. Now, we have some really powerful obgu I
N eurogynecology advocates that are there in Congress and making
sure these things are moving forward. So we have you know,
we have we have different opportunities for different people, so
you know it's not just a one stop shot hormone

(27:38):
replacementary therapy. When we talk about estrogen replacement, that is
definitely the the therapy that is going to help you
with your hot flashes. That's like the gold standard to
help prevent the hot flashes, which is what most people
hear about. But then there are other opportunities for us
as well if you don't want to use estrogen based
or progesterone based products.

Speaker 2 (27:57):
Is this true or false? Like does having a direct
me cause perimenopause or menopause Earlierly? Like that stage to
happen early, Because when you talk about knowing your family
history and stuff like that, I don't know a woman
in my family who's not over you know, fifty who
have not already had a hysterectomy from my mom, aunt's

(28:19):
older cousins. So I can't pinpoint what's what Like, I
am always happy when I see my period, right right,
So yeah, I love seeing my period because I mean,
I'm still I'm still youthful. I can still get pregnant,
pop that couch. I can do all things, okay, But
how do you know when everybody like, I don't know
when my mom would have went through menopause, especially now

(28:41):
you're saying like when menopause starts, it doesn't stop, like
that's just the rest of your life is menopause. Right now,
I don't know the difference between PMS and or menopause
with these old ladies.

Speaker 1 (28:52):
Yeah, I understand, I understand. It's me. Yeah, so ask
your question again because I got in, you know, with
the PAPTA. I got throw off with the pop. Sorry,
I'm sorry, pop couci because listen, it's women in menopause
still popping their koucie. Don't get yes, absolutely, which is
why I need to mention this that we still need
to even though people are like, oh, I can't get
pregnant because I've gone through menopause, my eggs and run out.

(29:14):
The likelihood of me getting pregnant is very, very low.
But I never put anything past the higher power. We
still need to prevent STDs. So gotneria chamitia herpe' heppatitus HIV.
So because people are living longer, stronger, and thriving past
their fifties, we still need to reprevent all of that.

Speaker 2 (29:31):
But go back to your menopause quicker right, oh with
instaur Yes, that's what.

Speaker 1 (29:36):
So. So it's interesting because hysterectomy means removal of the uterus.
But if you ask the woman if I you've had
a hysterectomy, many of them don't know whether or not
they got their ovaries and rears remove, right, so it's
not even a partial hys direct me. The removal of
an ovaries is called a oopharectomy, that's what it's called.
The removal of the tubes is called a salping jectomy.

(29:58):
The removal of the uterus is called a hysterectomy. So, yes,
you have to very much get into the nuance with
people about that. Now, sometimes when you remove the uterus,
some of the blood flow that would be going to
the ovaries decreases, so people can see the changes. Like
I said, you can have some minstrul excuse me, you
can have some perimenopause symptoms that seem to come on

(30:22):
maybe not faster, but because you have decreased blood flow,
you're getting those types those same type of symptoms. It's
more when that estrogen level is gone. So if you
have your ovaries removed, then yes, no longer are you. Yes,
you are in medical or surgical menopause right then and there.
So you can have surgical menopause, meaning that I took

(30:42):
out your ovaries or decreased the significant flow to your ovaries.
You can have medical menopause, which means I gave you
medication to stop the function of your ovaries. Or you
can have what a quote unquote natural menopause, where you've
just matured and aged into menopause. And that is a
questions because so many people are like, welly have my
uterers taken out? I don't know if I'm gone through menopause.

(31:04):
If you listen to your body, you will absolutely know
when you stop cycling. But we have to be in
tune with our bodies. And that's why I teach a
lot about mindset and knowing yourself from the inside out.
I had a friend she was fighting breast cancer, and
she said that she was going into early menopause because
of the medicine is that this happened from chemotherapy will

(31:27):
send you into early menopause. So that's what we call
medical menopause. So yes, you can you can actually end
up starting to have the symptoms. You can fully go
into menopause, or you can go into a state of
you know, stopping where those medications are stopping the hormones
from functioning that they normally do. And that's the whole purpose,
especially when you have an estrogen or progesterone positive breast cancer.

(31:50):
So you can either be paused or you can actually
fully go into the menopause. And everybody is a little
bit different how they respond to those therapies and medications.

Speaker 2 (31:58):
And don't they they're like medication that can I was
gonna say, don't they have like a medication that can
like basically if you're going through chemo, that can like
guard your eggs correct.

Speaker 1 (32:08):
So they do put you on medications that can help,
like I said, make that pause happen so that it
can help protect right, But we don't know until you
come off with all the medications whether or not what
functionality you're gonna have. And that's typically not something that
they're just gonna do for you. You gotta pay for that,
right like, because well, no, that that a lot of

(32:30):
times is a part of your therapy, and they should
be having the conversation with women in regards to how
do I protect my ovaries, how do I continue to
maintain my fertility? And also and then I'm thinking you're
talking about potentially egg harvesting, so when I harvest my
eggs so that I can save them so that I
can use them for later, either in my uterus or

(32:50):
womb or somebody else's. And that brings me to my
next question. Does stress play a part in how quickly
your body goes into the change? Absolutely?

Speaker 2 (33:00):
Absolutely, I think that especially for Black women, we are
known to go through menopause perimenopause about eight months to
a year earlier than women women are kind of part right,
non women of color, I guess you could say Caucasian women,
whatever you want.

Speaker 1 (33:16):
To say, bege. So, yeah, and I do believe that
that is associated with the amount of stress and weight
that we carry from racism, structural racism, discrimination, prejudice, and
then just having the weight of the world on our shoulders,
you know, the financial responsibilities, the mental and emotional responsibilities
that we carry more than most people do. Stop stressing.

Speaker 2 (33:38):
Yeah, it's gonna get old fast, and that's another reason why.

Speaker 1 (33:43):
You know though, that's the only thing, right, get older faster.
But you will look it, I know, right, And a
lot of people are like, oh, I don't look my age,
and yeah, it's true. Many times we don't look our
age because I think that genetically, genetically, we have developed
protective mechanism so that we don't age in the same
way that other people age. But I will tell you

(34:04):
if you are smoking, and if you are you know, significantly,
if you're OBEs, significantly overweight, if you are not managing
your cardiovascular health diabetes, it doesn't matter. You know, if
you're not doing those things, you're gonna look older than
you should. Amen to that. That's what I was going
to ask, like, when you how does fitness like, how

(34:24):
should we change our fitness when we're going to pair
mini pause, because I assume our metabolisms and things like
that are affected by this as well. So you're absolutely
so it's slow. Your menabolisms are slowing down. And so
what I tell people is encourage young people already to
exercise whatever that is if it's dancing, dancing, zooma and

(34:48):
whatever it is, pilates, running, hiking, biking, getting out there
and walking. Make sure you're doing that so young, if
you're young, put your kids in some type of sports
and make them do it. As you mature, continue doing that.
Find your community so that you can enjoy exercise. We
should be enjoying. We should be exercising five or six
times a week, if not seven, right, even if the

(35:10):
seventh day is going for a walk, but we should
be exercise and enjoying that. So and then as you are,
as you are aging, right, you should be increasing your
strength exercises. So that is why you know, even doing
resistance bans is so important. So adding weights you don't
have to add, you know, significantly heavy weights. You don't
have to lift one hundred, two hundred pounds. You don't

(35:32):
have to do that. You can lift twenty thirty pounds.
You can lift your own body weight. I mean, you
know you weigh one hundred and twenty one hundred and
sixty pounds or more.

Speaker 2 (35:40):
N I never been able to lift my body weight
since I was an elementary. I can't never do a
pull up.

Speaker 1 (35:46):
Yeah, so be on there. But you know, we start
with we start with doing pushups. So in the morning,
when I wake up, I do my body scan and
this is part of my Vivi Life program that I do.
But I wake up, I do my body scan and
I ask myself, you know, what's going on in my
body from the top of my head down to the
sole of my feet, and how do I focus my
energy so I can heal that space. Then I get
down on the floor, I do my Calisenics and that's

(36:07):
push ups, that's crunches, that stretches, and I know it
sounds funny, right, So I don't know. My mom watched jacqu.

Speaker 2 (36:14):
Lolaine, and you know I did a tibo when I
was in my twenties and thirties. Whatever you need to
do to keep moving and to keep that body, you know, strong,
those are the things that we need to do.

Speaker 1 (36:25):
I remember one time I went to this female doctor
and I was putting on weight and I was like,
but I just don't have time. My life is so busy.
I just travel and I work in two different cities
and I just don't have time. And she was like,
I'm a mother of five, I'm a wife, I have
this practice and I still find time every morning to

(36:46):
get up and go to the gym. So what were
you saying? And then it becomes my hair and all
that other stuff. No, I schedule it. So one of
the things my family knows is the first hour of
the day is mine. That's where I meditate, journal and
get my exercise in, and then for the rest of
the day, I'm optimizing my nutrition, my hormones in my
sleep and I get my sleep. And so you're talking

(37:08):
to an obgyn who used to, you know, do thirty
six hourships and still got her work out in because
it just makes you feel better mentally and emotionally, and
of course it's going to help the physical aspects your
heart health, prevent diabetes, prevent significant weight gain, all of that. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (37:25):
The crazy thing is I have a consultation today at
a weightlifting gym. All right, Yeah, because I go to
the gym, but I don't be knowing what I'm doing
half the time, right, And I want to like, I
just don't want shit to.

Speaker 1 (37:38):
Move no more.

Speaker 2 (37:39):
I want the body to stay kind of like the
same size, but I don't want no more jiggle.

Speaker 1 (37:43):
Yeah, I understand, and that can happen. And so you're
being intentional about what you do and how you do it.
Because you don't have to be in the gym for
twenty two hours. You don't have to do that.

Speaker 2 (37:53):
It's a discipline inconsistency for me, man, I just got
to get some discipline in my life.

Speaker 1 (37:57):
Yep, listen, I will. I did seventy five hard earlier
this year, and I was going to the gym twice
a day for seventy five days straight. And then right
after that, I did seventy five fat like right behind it,
run again seventy five You better cut it out. I
struggle with the consistencies, like just staying with it. That's

(38:20):
my hardest part. I can do. I do the workouts,
I know the workouts, I know the routines, I know
how to live ways, but just going for life a
lifestyle change is what I struggle with. That is that
my kryptonite. So I don't I tell me understand. And
that's one thing that we have just incorporated in my life,
you know, Like I said, it's on my calendar, and

(38:41):
don't mess with me. And even if I can't get
like a hard workout in, I'm going to do something,
even you know, walking something to get my mind going
like right now, I don't feel like going to the gym,
but I'm out there every morning and I'm walking two
and a half miles and I'm going uphills and I'm
using the resistance bands, doing the push ups in the setups.
Excuse me, m all, I'm gonna go in a little while,

(39:04):
I think today.

Speaker 2 (39:06):
And you gotta be in a community, right, So if
you're in a community of people that this is what
they do.

Speaker 1 (39:11):
So that's what my Viva lifeers and I do. Like
we encourage each other to do all of these things.
And it's not really like me saying you need to go,
it's them seeing me go. Like I'm out there and
I'm like, hey, what y'all doing? You know? And the
next thing I know, everybody else is out doing something too. Right,
that's you don't encourage me to get my ass up
to They an't go because I wasn't gonna go because
but I'm gonna go just because you said that. And

(39:33):
let me ask you this, I never like, I never
heard of Peri menopause. I heard of menopause growing up,
but Perry menopause was never a thing.

Speaker 2 (39:41):
Is that the I just started hearing about it the
last Is it a new convent?

Speaker 1 (39:46):
No, not at all. I mean, you know, I will
tell you when I first started hearing about it was
about twenty years ago when Oprah was on with doctor
Hill I think her name was hilde Brand or Hilda
greath but she they talked about What Women Need to
Know about Sex was the book, and so it was
a whole I mean, Oprah did a whole thing on menopause,
just like she's doing now in perimenopause. But I will
tell you when I even when I was going through training.

(40:07):
You know, you grow up and they tell you're going
to have your period and they tell you don't get pregnant, right,
but they don't tell you anything between that or about that.
When I was going through my OBGUI N training, we
got the graphs that said this is what happens with estrogen, progesterone, testosterone.
I will be honest with you, it's not until you
hit the different stages that you're like, oh, this is
what they were talking about. So the reason why you
feel like it hasn't been talked about is number one,

(40:29):
they stopped talking about it, especially after that whole Women's
Health Initiative, because they didn't want people to be on
horrimal replacement. Right. The other thing is it's coming up.
You're going into the time of your life where other
people are going into the time of their life where
they're starting to feel these things, so you're more interested
in it.

Speaker 2 (40:45):
Like, we don't talk about how to get pregnant until
you're trying to get pregnant, right, So same thing, You're
not going to.

Speaker 1 (40:50):
Talk about perimenopause until you're going through the experience.

Speaker 2 (40:54):
So like, what are some of the symptoms that women
made mistake for something else but it's perimenopause.

Speaker 1 (41:00):
Yeah, so these are important things. So I'm gonna start
with the heart, right. So a lot of people actually
end up getting heart palpitations, anxiety, and sometimes some shortness
of breast, chest pain. But we also have to make
sure that we're ruling out what could kill you, right,
So we got to make sure that it's not a
heart attack. We got to make sure that is not
some other kind of arrhythm or changes in your heart rate.

(41:21):
But those are some of the things a lot of
people get palpitations anxiety associated with perimenopause menopause. The other
thing is people will notice that their weight changes, So
they start getting what we call the mino belly or
that mid that midriff weight game, that the what do
they call it, the upha, the punfa, whatever it's called.

(41:43):
But you know, yeah, so the muffin tops. So you
start getting that and people are like, wait a second,
what's going on with that? And so we have to
make sure are you having a gastrulinetestinal problem that's going
along with that? Is this friboids that's potentially going on?
So going back to the head to toe exam is
very important. And what I've noticed in mere cards, we've
gotten away from examining people so that we can make

(42:04):
a differential diagnosis means what could this be and what
more likely is this? People also start having joint pains
and so they're like, uncle Arthur is here right, So
they think they have our ritis, but it's actually inflammation
because the estrogen actually moisturizes our joints, helps moisturize that.
So you know, those are some of the symptoms besides

(42:24):
the hot slashes, vaginal dryness, mood swings. Mood swings are huge.
But we have to figure out is this depression, you know,
is it truly depression? Do you have a bipolar exacerbation
exacerbation or is this associated with perimenopause or menopause? So
those are so so okay.

Speaker 2 (42:41):
So people going through perimenopause get like bipolar symptoms in hand.

Speaker 1 (42:46):
Yeah, I mean if you if you ask, like my
best friend call and she was like, I don't know
what's going on with my my mom, and a lot
of men I'll tell you this too. A lot of
men will tell you this too. They're like, man, I
don't know what's going on over but she seemed like
and then the other thing is as new as you mature,
you can also you know ad ad D. People can
get the you know, uh focused deficits. And you hear

(43:09):
me saying, because you get brain fog and you can't
figure out what word you're supposed to say. So then
some people are thinking they're going through Alzheimu's or yeah.
So yeah, I'd be feeling like that sometimes.

Speaker 2 (43:20):
But like I said, but when we before we started recording,
like I had, I mentioned this last week too, I
had a physical done and I'm like super iron deficient.
But that can also cause like the brain fog. That's hardness.
So I never once thought I was going through the
change though, But I knew something was going on.

Speaker 1 (43:39):
But remember, you are going through change constantly. Our bodies
are constantly changing, even on a blood change. Yeah, but
you are if I mean, if you're if you're in
your forties, you are going through the change. You just
haven't gotten to the big part of the change. You're
going through these small, minute, po portions of the change.
But yeah, you're going through the change.

Speaker 2 (43:58):
So okay, can you can you like, as long as
you have your period, that means you're not in perimenopause
and you're not in menopause.

Speaker 1 (44:06):
So as long as you have your period, so let
me put it this way, as long as you're continuing
to consistently have your period, then you are not in menopause,
but you can still be PERIMENOPAUSM. So the time prior
to you stopping your period for that twelve months is
called perimenopause. Now, one thing I want to say, because

(44:28):
some people will stop their periods for the twelve months
and then have a period that needs to be investigated
for endometrial cancer. Mm. Yeah, we have to investigate that.
So if you stop having your period going on, Yeah,
if you stop your period for twelve months and all
of a sudden you start having you know, bleeding, spotting

(44:49):
or anything like that. Then that needs to be evaluated
because it could be a form of cancer. It could
be and it could be you know that depending on
where you are, you can have significant stress that trigger something.
You have this quartisole response you're you know, and then
you unfortunately start having bleeding, especially in women in fibroids.
I've seen that happen to them where they have the fibroids,
and even though in menopause they should be shrinking, but

(45:12):
you're having some significant stressors going on and for some
reason you've triggered your hormonal milieu and it actually calls
you to bleed. But even in that instance, I still
make sure I'm ruling out intimutual cancer do women, because
I feel like black women get fibroids more than our
you know, counterparts. And does that affect like how quick

(45:33):
you go into perry in menopause when you have fibroids,
So fibroids doesn't affect that. However, your hormonal changes will
affect the fibroids. So that's why you see women having
you know, growth of the fibroids. That's why you also
see them having these heavy, unbearable periods associated with fibroids.

(45:54):
So that is all the fibroids are hormonally impacted. So
that's why you see some of the changes that are
going on. I wouldn't say that having fibroids puts you
into perimenopause faster. Remember that is very much based on
your brain hormones and your ovaries and that communication between both.
Why do you think that black women get fibroids more

(46:14):
than other people? Yeah? So, you know what, I'll be
honest with you. Part of that is the stressors that
we are taking on because you know, estrogen doesn't just
live in our ovaries, it lives in the adipost tissue
as well. Okay, Cortisol responses from stressors, what we're eating,
what our environments are, and then what our genetic history is.

(46:36):
Oh and for example, my family, they all have many
people in my family have had fibroids. I've never had fibroids.
I actually get my ultrasound done to make sure that
they check for fibroids. But I've also been on progesterone
for almost my entire life through my IUD. I also
like I said, practice the Viva Life five for my
entire almost my entire life, even before I named what

(46:56):
it was. That's what I do, and so minimize that stress,
making sure environmentally that I am, you know, not in
environments that could probably trigger the hormonal responses or growth
as well as what I'm eating. So food is your
medicine as well. Do you use sizing salt? Do you
use season of salt? Because I just cavery lawry is

(47:17):
what's giving us fibroids, y'all stop you. So do I
use season in salt sparingly? I would say yes, I
do loud. You know I grew up I'm flowers too,
but I use it very sparingly. So if you come
eat it at my house, you may feel like the
food might be a little bit more bland than you
used to. But that being said, you know, I don't
have hypertension, I don't have diabetes, I'm not overweight, and

(47:41):
I'm doing this intentionally. So it's really important to when
you're seasoning your food to make sure that we're minimizing
the sovium that's attached to it. I swear y'all over
the years, my mama's food is still good but it
tastes more like white people food because she don't use
salt like that no more. She don't well fry no more,
she don't. Everything is changing. But I mean, you know,

(48:03):
I'm adopting that a little bit. Okay, yeah, So, I
mean just taking out fried foods right will make such
a big difference. And what I tell people is if
you do it more than ninety percent of the time.
My colleague says eighty percent of the time. But if
you eat, you know, on that clean eating more than
ninety percent of the time or even eighty five percent
of the time, you're going to be so much better

(48:23):
off than most people in America. Agent five. Yeah, what
is Viva life five? You've meant life now, So v
class stamps for live. Viva means live life. And what
we're trying to do is help people live their healthiest
and wealthiest life spiritually. Spiritually exactlycates from women getting money. Okay,

(48:44):
oh yeah, say we leave no bags on the table, okay,
So spiritually, physically, financially, mentally, and emotionally, and essentially what
this entails is you get myself and my fellow consultants
to help you through webinars podcasts, affirmation rooms. So that's
the mindfulness pa, journaling, meditating and incorporating that exercise, hormone nutrition,

(49:09):
and making sure that you sleep. So it's a community
that we've created in order for you to do five
things pretty much every day and eat those five foods fruits, vegetables, nuts, grains, things,
drinking our water. And if you eat meat, make sure
it's clean and high quality. Do you eat meat? I
do eat meat. I make sure I try to make
sure it's clean, the high quality. Now that might be

(49:31):
the ten percent that I'm not doing correct all the time,
but yeah, I try to make sure that we're eating
high quality or minimizing it. You know what I'm saying.
I don't eat meat every single day. Do you eat
pork at all? I do. I went through the whole
phase of not eating pork at all, and I did.
I went through the whole you know, like it was.
It was funny, it was. I went to I went

(49:51):
to college, right, I went to Xavier University in New Orleans, Bblisiana.
I went to HBCU and I was like, I'm not
I'm not gonna eat meat.

Speaker 2 (49:58):
And I got there and I had no money. So
you had to eat a cafeteria and guess what they
put out every Friday. Pork chop bacon.

Speaker 1 (50:09):
You're like, all you can eat bacon. I was like, yeah,
some of that. Listen. Every time I meet someone over
one hundred, I asked them do they eat port? And
they say yes. I ain't meant a person yet over
one hundred that said they don't eat no port.

Speaker 2 (50:23):
It's not about the pork though, Like the food just
isn't what it used to be when they were our age, right.

Speaker 1 (50:29):
So that's just like I don't eat a lot of things.

Speaker 2 (50:32):
Yeah, it's just not the same.

Speaker 1 (50:34):
I don't eat a lot of pork. If I do
eat any I eat fish, I eat beef, high quality beef.
And then if I eat pork, if I be a
pork chop. Right, So, but it's not fried and all
that other stuff. But I have everything in moderation and
choose where you're gonna be. Another big thing is alcohol.
So minimizing your alcohol is very important through perimenopause and menopause.

(50:57):
You know, people say one or two drinks a day,
and I'm like that seems like a lot, But I
would say minimize it to like one or two drinks
a week would be better. And if you're noticing that
you're needing to drink every single day, then we'll probably
need to talk about whether or not there's some alcoholism
tendencies that are going on in your life. But that
will alcohol will exacerbate all the symptoms for a lot

(51:17):
of people. As I get older, I find that I
used to have fun, a lot of fun with alcohol,
but as I get older, I just feel like it
makes me sick. I don't feel good anymore when I
drink it. I don't. It takes me like three days
to get better after just having two or three drinks.
So does that have something to do with our bodies

(51:37):
changing too, like I can't liquor the same? Yep, absolutely absolutely.
And then the thing is, you know, a little bit
of red wine is okay, right, not the whole bottle
and not the glass that fills up with the whole bottle.

Speaker 2 (51:50):
Yea, the one pass one glass.

Speaker 1 (51:53):
Is a whole bottle. No, we're not doing that, but
a little bit of red wine. And you know, I
like whiskey, so I might have Sir Davis a couple
of times in the month, and you know that's what
I do. I understand what my ninety percent is and
understanding that. I also understand little things in my body
that tells me, you know what you're getting out of

(52:13):
You're getting out of parameters. So if my if my legs,
my thighs start like touching each other a little bit,
I'm like, I'm out of parameters, so i run out live.
My guys have never not touched like I've touched it.
I might just see you know well you and you
just got to know. I can tell when I gain
five PM, like I know when i'm I know my

(52:36):
exact weight because I understand my body and like you said,
you travel a lot, so we retain a lot of
water and there's some retention there, right, so it takes
a good forty five days to get that water just
to get that water weight off, and you have to
be very intentional about that, so you know, hydrating sometimes
a little apple sided vinegar. Sometimes I'll do a little
bit of castoil, olive oil. You know, just to make

(52:58):
sure that I'm keeping my gud clean healthy is really important,
So I do, heir, and I what made me bring
this conversation too, like want to have this conversation is
so my clients are aging with me, and a lot
of them are in their late thirties, early forties to fifties.
I don't have that many twenty somethings anymore. I have some,
but not that many. And I kept hearing the conversation

(53:20):
about perimenopause perimenopause, and I had one of my clients
particularly say that she was concerned because her vagina is
dry now. She's like, I don't know, Like I used
to be pouring a glass of water out of me,
and now it's like a Sahara desert, like it's tumbleweed's
rolling by when I pulled my kuchie out. Is there
something that people could write? Is it wild wild watts?

(53:44):
Is there something because women can do or eat? She's like,
I'm drinking water, I drink hell of water. I'm eating fruit.
Is there something that we could do or something that
women can take to make sure that their vagina they
keep it their wetness as long as possible when they're
going through these changes. Yeah, so I will say always

(54:06):
green leafy vegetables are very important, right, So making sure
that you're keeping your vitamin D, your iron levels up
as well as they're going to have what we call
adaptogens and nutrients that are going to help you keep
that collagen sometimes some vital estrogens and things like that.
But then also she can utilize basic things some olive oil,

(54:26):
a little bit of olive oil, daba olive oil or
coconut oil in the area and the vaginal area could
be very helpful. There's also products that kind of like
there's a product call raplens, but essentially that is a
lubricant she can use. But I'll be honest with you,
estrogen based products are like the best thing that you
can use. If you're okay with using estrogen, place it

(54:48):
in your vagina, small amount in your vagina a couple
times a week, and it will help you significantly. Important
thing though, if you're finding that you're using estrogen, especially
you're taking it by mouth or you have it on
a patch, or you're even using it in your vagina
like every single day, then we need to talk about
if you still have a uterus using the progesterone as well,

(55:09):
because we want to protect against that individual cancer that
we talked about. Mm. Yeah, I started taking Maca. You
take maca? Yes? Good? Yeah? Oh absolutely helps with the libido. Yes, ma'am. Yes,
Ostragonda maca what people, let's.

Speaker 2 (55:23):
Go, it's like a like a Peruvian like root. Is
a plant like ginger like root. Yeah, but it comes
and it tast really good too. It tastes like a
like a like a nut. So if you put it
like in a in a smoothie or something like that,
it has like a peanut buttery flavor. It's real good.

Speaker 1 (55:44):
Yeah. And then so I remember when I was having,
you know, being at work and everything all the time,
when I was breastfeeding my child. Finnagreek was another one.
And finnagreek is another plant based supplement that you can
use to help you moisturize, right, and it helps you
produce milk, so that that's another type of thing that
milk fits sole finigreed though, So though, there's if you

(56:06):
work with an integrated specialist or a natural path they'll
be able to give you more options in regards to
more plant based therapies rather than just you know, estrogen
is the only thing you can use.

Speaker 2 (56:18):
In your organization. Is that what you push towards more
the holistic you know, because in the medical industry they
want to push medicine. It's pharmacia Okay, that's the real,
real witchcraft as far as I'm concerned. Right, So they
push more you know, pharmaceutical medication as opposed to the organic.
There's really not a lot of doctors out there that

(56:40):
you know. I was just at the doctor recently and
I told her I do black seed oil for my
blood pressure, and you know, she immediately went into, well,
you know, the studies and all this other you know,
trying to deter you from doing more alternatives. So that
is that what you lean more towards as opposed to

(57:00):
like traditional medicine.

Speaker 1 (57:02):
Right, So I'm about all of it, right. I try
to make sure that people know their options, whether they
are non pharmaceutical or pharmaceutical. But I also try to
make sure that people understand the risk benefits of each
because if we're talking about it, you know, many things
are plant based, even if they are FDA approved or
through the pharmacy, many hands are plant based. If you're

(57:24):
compounding something then cassable. At a lot of times you're
using some type of plant plant based. So I think
it's really important, and I'll be honest with you. In
traditional medicine, they don't teach this portion of supplements plant
based medications or therapies, So which had come in that
y'all the real year. So that's why it's important. Like

(57:45):
I was saying, you know, look behind the name and say,
are you a functional medicine physician? Have you gotten your
naturopathic training, whether it's a certification or your actual natural
pactic doctor? And how do you put both of those
things together? What are my alternatives besides using what I
can get from former pharmacy. So give me non pharmacy
and pharmacy associated therapies that can be useful for me.

(58:08):
I believe in acupuncture, chiropractic work, like I've done all
these things, so I absolutely know that I don't have
to be in pain. Excuse me, I don't have to
take pain medications to resolve my pain. There's other options
for it as well. The pain, not my pain, the.

Speaker 2 (58:24):
Pain, So let's not take that in our Let's not
take that in our bodies, right right.

Speaker 1 (58:31):
So I feel like I've always had a healthy sexual appetite,
but it feels like since I turned forty, Like, man,
I'm like, who's calling my phone? Who's calling my phone?

Speaker 2 (58:41):
Like I wake it up?

Speaker 1 (58:42):
I'm like horny, Like all the time is that like
something that happens before Parry. Is that like normal or
is it? It is? So? I remember I told you
in perimenopause, your hormones are doing this right, so you're
going through this wax and way, so you're really feeling
so And also I told you perimenopause and many is
just like puberty, and what happened in puberty You found yourself.

(59:03):
You found all of that hotness. So that's one of
the things that you can actually experience. And that's why
you gotta be careful taking certain things like maca. Right,
you take maca, you go, you might elevate or take
it like it helps men's libido. Jim, Yeah, absolutely, So
I'm going through I shouldn't take no moca right now

(59:26):
because I might just have to be chandelier if I
take some of that shit. I feel like, yeah, you
have to be careful. You have to be careful about it.
And so that's why having that personal line conversation and say, Okay,
what symptoms are you experiencing and what do what do
you want to temper or what do you want to improve?
I think the biggest thing about you know, anything that
you decide to take you should be taking it because

(59:48):
it's supplementing what is going on in your body. So,
like you said, you might not need maca root, but
you might need something to help you with stress or
calm me down. So you know that's something, and that's
a different opportunity for you. I will say, somebody asked me,
do I have to take hormone replacement therapy estrogen replacement
therapy progesterone if you still be uterus? And I will

(01:00:10):
say that the number one killer of women, especially black
women's cardiovascular disease point blank, hypertension, stroke, arrhythmius. Right, And
so what has been found is that the estrogen the
replacement is reducing the cardiovascular disease. Now, you got to
do all the other things too. So if you so
choose not to take the replacement, then you got you

(01:00:33):
really got to do all the other things when we
talk about the stress reduction, the exercise, the nutrition, and
the sleeps, and we really need to get our sleep, ladies.
I mean, there is nothing wrong with sleeping.

Speaker 2 (01:00:43):
I love down. Okay, I keep staying making T shirts
that say that I love to Later, I get my sleep.
I don't know if it's always RESTful, though, yes, I
do have hot flashes at night. Sometimes I'd be hot
as hell at night.

Speaker 1 (01:00:57):
Yeah, and so those are the hormonal change wets talking about.
But back to your question about the sex. If you're
feeling hot and horny, I think it's okay. I mean,
I will say when I was in my early forty
that was the best time of my life. Baby. I
was like this, I've been I've been missing this. I
didn't you know I was. I was away from my husband,
I was deployed when I was pregnant with my child,

(01:01:19):
so I didn't get like that, like pregnancy sex that
everybody was talking about. I didn't get all of that.
But Babe, when I turned forty, it was on the topic.
It's crazy. It feels like I'm crazy right now. It's great,
it's wonderful. And bursic got me going so crazy right now.

Speaker 2 (01:01:34):
Yes, that I definitely be horny. Man, I don't want
it to stop, though.

Speaker 1 (01:01:40):
I don't, so that's why we have no time.

Speaker 2 (01:01:41):
I don't wanted to stop.

Speaker 1 (01:01:42):
Not okay, That's why we're having this conversation so that
we can prevent it from stopping.

Speaker 2 (01:01:48):
My doctor asked me the other day if I still
get a period, I'm like, yes, the fuck I dude,
I'm happy about it. I need to see my shit
every month.

Speaker 1 (01:01:58):
And it's really important to track yourself, right. People used
to track their periods so they can see whether or
not they could get pregnant. Are they pregnant, that whole thing.
But it's still important to track your cycle as you're
going through this. And it's not just tracking the period,
is tracking the symptoms associated with the cycles. So remember
your cycle is every twenty one to thirty days. That's
a cycle. The period is just the mysteration. That's just

(01:02:21):
a certain part. But you know you're going to feel
you know, more loving and accepting at some part in
your cycle, and other times you'd be like, get off
of me, you know, I don't want to be bothered.
So it's really important to understand that and see how
many times you are feeling that through the day, because
then you can start tracking your perimenopausal symptoms into menopause.
What conversation should mothers and daughters be having about menopause

(01:02:43):
that most of us aren't all of this because you
know your children are going to experience your menopause, probably
they're going to notice something that's changing faster than you
notice the change in yourself. So having these conversations with
your boys and girls or however they identify, and making
sure that you're having these conversations to say, you know,

(01:03:05):
this is the menstrual cycle, this is menc's, this is
what happens when you're in your twenties to thirties. Is
what happens in your thirties and forties, forties and fifties beyond.
But in order to have those conversations, we need to
be educated about those conversations, which is why I love
coming on podcasts. This is why I love having corporate sessions.
So we provide six corporate sessions to corporations organizations to

(01:03:25):
improve women health in their organization, and then we do
the individual discussions as well.

Speaker 2 (01:03:31):
So you're so ko koe, right, consult it's not just
for corporations. Individuals can also.

Speaker 1 (01:03:39):
Right, So the corporations. So that's why we created Viva
Life SPF ME, which is the program that's more like
having the group conversation individually based, and that's where you'll
get the podcast, the webinars and the coaching sessions, right.
But the corporate sessions are when we go in we
try to improve health inequities for different healthcare plans as

(01:04:00):
well as if we're like if I'm at Boeing or
something or another corporation, then we're working with the women
on the top five diseases that are happening. We're educating
them so that they have a health plan. Well, what
do I talk to my physician or practitioner about so
that I can actually get the benefit out of this
healthcare plan instead of just like paying this, you know,
one hundred to one thousand dollars two thousand dollars a month.

Speaker 2 (01:04:23):
Yeah and yees. Right now is like open enrollment, and
I cannot stand it. I don't know what the hell
is going on half the time.

Speaker 1 (01:04:31):
I know it's hard to figure it out. It's hard
to figure it out to do those comparisons. But you
know what go on chat GPT put in your information
and say what health care plan is best for me? Yeah?
And you know this is so off topic.

Speaker 2 (01:04:44):
I don't be fucking with CHATGBT like that because I
feel like it starts like then tracking you, because it's
some stuff in there that I'm like, why are you
suggesting this to me? This has nothing to do with
what I just asked you about. So they have all
your conversations and they know you now they.

Speaker 1 (01:05:00):
Do, so there's a way for you to turn off.
There's a way to turn off the learning piece that
they can't get those conversations out into like everybody's else's
learning piece. Right. But there's a great person her name
is Alicia Little. She teaches AI and she will give
you all the tips, tricks and the tools for it.
But I wouldn't be afraid of it. I mean, you know,
I'm prior military, right, I retired from the military, babe

(01:05:22):
chat GBT and got nothing on what the henilitary has
already been doing already know. So it's it's just one
of those things. It has been out for thirty years. Yeah,
So it's just one of those things like either you
get ahead of it or it gets ahead of you.
Either you are the food or you become the farmer.
So just decide where you want to be with.

Speaker 2 (01:05:39):
That, I understand. Yep.

Speaker 1 (01:05:42):
All right, is there anything that you want to tell
our listeners that they need to know about Perry? That
there is imperative that they understand about Perry mendoopause and
menopause before you go. Absolutely, so, Perry menopause. Menopause, it's
going to happen, so don't be afraid of it happening.
Be educated, understand it. Track your cycles, track your mencies,

(01:06:06):
track your symptoms. Talk to your family. We should know
our family histories and if you're adopted, you know, try
to figure out genetically what's going on. But have these conversations.
Do not be afraid of the change, and reach out
to your subject matter experts that you know, that's what
we do. We trained in this, and those subject matter
experts don't have to be you know, older. Everybody you

(01:06:27):
know older doesn't know. Everybody that says O, B G,
I N actually doesn't know. But make sure you find
out those resources that you can really get that that
conversation that is specific towards you. Do not be afraid
of this. It can be the best time of your
life as well and period.

Speaker 2 (01:06:44):
Basically, reach out to Koe Medical Consulting.

Speaker 1 (01:06:47):
Okay, thank you, so yeah doctor Kelly om D D
r K E L L y O m D dot com.
If you want to join Viva Life or get some
consulting services. I'm definitely going to reach out. I want
to do and I need to change how I'm living
because I love it. I eat bacon, A piece of bacon.
Hate to see me coming. I threw it. Now, well,

(01:07:10):
I definitely need to make some lifestyle changes, all right,
So we have a segment called the Dumb Bitch Story.
I told you a little bit about it. So we're
gonna have a break, and when we come back, I
want you to share a story with us. All right, guys,
we are back, and doctor Kelly has her story. Go ahead, alrighty,

(01:07:34):
So when you first told me this, I was like,
I mean, I ain't never been a right, right no virgo.
I almost got to ask that, what's your son? I'm
a virgo born on set. Some reports the damn story
tell a lie? Are you pimp in your whole life?
Virgoals are? I was like, yeah, never got played a virgo.

Speaker 2 (01:07:52):
They somebody kind of twisted to its always in their favor.

Speaker 1 (01:07:56):
Even though I was on the phone, you was crying
about it. But okay, two years lady, like didn't happen.

Speaker 2 (01:08:01):
You got it? Go ahead, Brighton and I at that
a September the fourth Urgo as well.

Speaker 1 (01:08:06):
So that's a whole other level. But my story is
I remember when I was in college, right and I
didn't have a car, I didn't have no money, whatever
the case may be. And this guy said, you know,
I want to take you out. But I wasn't the
type of person that was giving out nothing. Okay, so
you wasn't. You weren't getting anything if you weren't in
a long term relationship with me and he we had
set up to have go on a date and I'm excited,

(01:08:27):
I'm dressed, ready, the whole thing. I'm looking out the window,
you know, wait for him to call to say he
was downstairs so I can come out my dorm room.
And the call never came, and I was like, what
just happened? And so maybe a thirty six hours later,
I get a phone call like, oh hey, you know,
you know, some things came up. And I was like,
I was like, is your mom said right just passed away?

(01:08:49):
Did you get in a car accident? And he was
like no, noa NOA. I was like okay, and he's like,
so when you want me to pick you up? I
was like never click. So that was my that was
my story. And I got stood up for a date
and that never happened again. I just needed to make
sure that you know, he wasn't dead somewhere, his mama
didn't die, because if he told me that, I might
have you know my name. So you never ever got

(01:09:12):
you never even found out why he missed the date.
You ain't care why virgos, These virgos boys.

Speaker 2 (01:09:21):
It's not a dumb bitch story.

Speaker 1 (01:09:23):
Now. If you would have said, day, yeah, he called again.

Speaker 2 (01:09:25):
Three weeks and three more weeks later then and I'm
going out with him again, then that's dumb bitch. That
was the dumbest I've ever been. But you know I
will I will tell you why. No, I'll tell you why.
I'll tell you why.

Speaker 1 (01:09:41):
It's because I grew up with you know, my brothers,
my god brothers. They I used to listen to my
brothers roll game on girls all the time. They got shoes, clothes, cars, whatever,
and they would be like, wash this, and they said,
don't ever be a chicken head. But who's the chicken head?
And really, unwitches lily guy had ship. So that's that's

(01:10:09):
what that's what they told me, and so I listened.
I listened the whole time. And I work in a
male dominated environment right my whole life. I'm a surgeon.
I'm a doctor, I'm in then I was in the
Navy for twenty six years. I was like, yeah, y'all
not getting me.

Speaker 2 (01:10:21):
I feel you.

Speaker 1 (01:10:22):
No, I'm here for that. But that was like not
a dumbest story. I thought about this all night too,
that one time. That one nigga like what had this
big card? Like when? Because when I told her, She's like, yeah,
I've never even played. I don't know what you're talking about.

Speaker 2 (01:10:37):
I'm like, come up with you.

Speaker 1 (01:10:39):
Why do you have another one? And I'm still like
a salty about it. But you know, I invested in
a friend's company and I looked at all the financials
and everything like that. I'm still waiting for my money.
So if that's another one, that could be another one
that's will be very careful about your investments, and especially
if you're trying to help a friend out and see

(01:10:59):
them grow, and you know, in this day and age
when everybody's like, you know, support black businesses and all
that other stuff. Naboo, I need to see your financials,
your tax reports. I need to see like open them
books everything, open the books. So that would be another
another dB story. A DVS. We are you dating that person? No, No,
we just have been friends for like over twenty years. Yeah,

(01:11:21):
you don't count.

Speaker 2 (01:11:22):
I don't know. Anytime money and somebody owe me some money,
I might have been a dumb bitch giving you my money.

Speaker 1 (01:11:27):
I might have been Yeah, yeah that was the that
was the DBS. That that's another big DBS. Now this
younger one. That was a young DBS. This older one.
I probably should have, you know, thought a little bit
harder and listened to you trying to help though, So
that don't mean well I don't have them. I'm a
Bergo born on September or fourth.

Speaker 2 (01:11:48):
I'm urgalarizing, and I definitely not got played a couple
of times in life, man, definitely. Okay, I'm about to
take the nigga on vacation on Monday, so I rooby
have a dumb bitch story for y'all week. We'll see, Hey,
nigga be in the bathroom all the time.

Speaker 1 (01:12:06):
I think, Kelly, I haven't joined Viva Life five yet.
Come on through. We'll help you not be a d
d S. All right, all right, one more time. Tell
everybody they where they can find you, where they can
follow you on social media, plug all your things. Oh
thank you so much.

Speaker 2 (01:12:24):
So I'm doctor Kelly OMZ and you can find me
www dot d r K E L L y O
m D dot com if you go there, Instagram doctor
Kelly Omd as well as Facebook, Instagram, Viva Life SPF me.
So just go to the website, click all the little
buttons and you'll find me. All right, thank you so much,

(01:12:44):
doctor Kelly.

Speaker 1 (01:12:45):
Fun. This is end. I got a lot of information
that I needed, so thank you so so very much. Absolutely,
I have fun too, thanks for bringing out You know,
the virgos can be real serious, so thank you for
bringing out the laughter and me as well. Good you
get into the bag.

Speaker 2 (01:12:59):
That's one thing about it.

Speaker 1 (01:13:00):
Virgo boy, they go ahead and get I'm gonna get
that bag.

Speaker 2 (01:13:04):
Yeah all right, y'all. If you enjoy this episode, y'all,
tune in every Thursday on the iHeartRadio app or wherever
the fuck you get excuse me, where the f you
get your podcasts at your co hosts aj Holiday.

Speaker 1 (01:13:15):
Two point oh on instagrams. Kick It Tam, y'all, It's
official Tam Bam on Instagram, y'all. Follow me there, y'all.
Follow We Talk Back podcast on Instagram, y'all. I love
y'all so much and I appreciate y'all for tuning in
every week. I can't wait to see you next week.
Come back y'all, Remember speak.

Speaker 2 (01:13:32):
Now and never hold that Nigga Pieri.

Speaker 1 (01:13:38):
And never stop popping that peep Bye. We Talk Back
podcast is the production of iHeart Radio. Visit the iHeartRadio app,
Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
Thanks for listening and celebrating five years of the Black
Effect podcast network with us. Keep following because the next

(01:13:58):
five years are about to be even big. The