April 10, 2023 • 52 mins
We’re heading to The Hills when Jana catches up with Heidi Pratt for a real look at her time on reality TV, and what went on behind the scenes in her relationship with Spencer Pratt.
Find out who from The Hills she still keeps in touch with, and learn where she stands with Lauren Conrad!
Plus, Heidi shares an important lesson in faith and forgiveness
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
Wine Down with Janet Kramer and I Heart Radio Podcast.
All Right, guys, catch my breath? All right, are you
good there? KB? Whoa thirty weeks you guys were closing
in downs the gun. Yeah, because you can technically, I
mean technically technically I've had friends. Okay, what was it,
twenty four weeks? She just get dry breast one? No,
(00:24):
I filled them in. Thanks for noticing. She looks really pretty.
She has good makeup? Did good makeup? I need you
look really refreshed, like you look like yourself still, just
like very refreshed version, which is my favorite kind of
makeup for people. I just got some new just like yeah,
like moisturize her anyway. Thanks. Yeah, I was just like sorry.
(00:46):
It was the first time I looked at you, and
I was like, all right, I like it. Really sorry
back to you, KB, Apologies were taking that away from you.
It's a big moment. No, it's just a big body.
Uh No, I was saying, because we've gosh, well, how
how young were those twins that are people? Twenty four
micro which is my girl. Yeah, they had like a
(01:07):
zero or like a two percent, and but they both survived.
I shouldn't be sorry. I should This has been a no.
But I know, but I'm saying, but like, at this point,
your baby could survive. I feel really like there is
a point in pregnancy where you get to where you
just started a little deeper. Yeah, a little until you
got the stairs and then you're back out of breath
again and then you get out of breath. Yeah, but
(01:28):
it's good, so good. This has been my most um
reassuring baby of the three. Real love the four really
but um yeah, because I it moves so much. Oh so,
I never wonder if if it's okay in there. I
think she's like, hey, just so you know, like, I'm here, Mom,
I'm here. Danna always thinks it's a girl. It's for
sure a girl, Like I will get a boy. I
(01:50):
will put money on it. That's a girl. Are you
a good guesser? Mmm? I mean I have a fifty
fifty shots, right. I usually am wrong, So whatever I
guess is usually a sit for people. That's why I
wonder if you're like, yeah, I'm undefeated. What were you guessing? Oh?
I think it's a girl too. I've been correct with
my own children, but everybody else is I'm horrible. Oh interesting, Yeah,
(02:12):
I feel like I can like call It's like my
sense of direction. You know direction you do. Thank you
every time we're out of town. Just trust me, I
know where I'm going. Thank you. Don't even meet a map,
I just sniff it out. We're all trying to get
the you know, it's like it's this way, guys. I
don't know. I've just always been you know why. It's
(02:34):
because I lived in the boonies from all of my
friends and at that time, that was pre map quest.
I try to figure out how to get to figure
it out. It was pre map quest, Yeah, print it
out just to figure it out. No, I think it
was like so I was the oldest of the drivers
and so I think it was. I remember printing it out,
like going it going to someone's house. But it was
(02:56):
like very new. Yeah, like because I was like having
to write out mapst got me in the biggest trouble
of my life. What happened. So my best friend Julie
Cooper and I Mattie, she is still my best friend.
Shout out to UK. I've never heard of her territorial
here for it. So we printed out we were going
(03:18):
to sneak off to Michigan State oh uh huh, which
is like not like me. I get very nervous. I'm
a rule follower. And we printed up the directions from
her house to Michigan State and left them on the
printer and her mom was like, you're going to go
to Michigan State tonight and we were like, no, no way,
and she like holds up the paper, what is this for?
(03:38):
And I was like uh oh, and we were busted
and then we were forbidden to see each other for
like ever, isn't that senior? A senior senior in high school?
Do you ever have Do you have a defining moment
from childhood or something? Because mine came up just a
couple days ago and I was walking with the kids,
like I remembered something from our child hood that I've
(04:01):
just I've it's always like it's it's just an interest story,
just kind of like that where you get caught, Okay, okay,
so it's where you get caught, yeah, and I got
caught as a kid, but it's I mean, it's years
is years is better, but it's I was the same
mind for Kat can think about hers, but I me
and my girlfriend Lindsay Crocker. Who did you met her. Yeah,
(04:24):
I've never met her, so she's acceptable. Yeah, she's she
came on the best one time. She's I mean, I
mean we're not like you know, it was Lindsay Crocker.
You're not like me and you go ahead there. It
was Lindsay Crocker and Mary Dodge, and I was kind
of always like so it was like me and Lindsay
were the closest and then when there was the three
of us, I was the outside. Okay, she was also
(04:45):
close to Mary too, long story short, and Lindsay I
was probably Jolie's age, like seven, six or seven. We
wanted to do a dance show for our neighborhood and
put on a dance like in the common area. So
days on brand, are you okay? So I had we
had made these flyers. We came up with this amazing
(05:07):
dance in her basement of course perfect and my I
wasn't allowed to cross the street like without a parent,
and so what I did, and so my because we
were had to hand out the flyers, right, I mean,
when I go to the neighbor's house, like to give
the flyers. Like, so my mom found out that you know,
(05:29):
she saw the flyer in the other like in the mailbox,
I think, or whatever, and I got grounded, and um,
we never did our dance. But you know what's funny
is I never really canceled it, so I don't even
know that. I still wonder if anyone showed up, huge group,
everyone in hand, wondering where. But I just remember getting
(05:54):
like I couldn't cross the street. And so yesterday or
the other day, when I was walking with the kids,
I said, please stop at the stop sign, but they
had then run across the street and gone home, and
I was like, don't ever do that again. I was like,
without mommy, because these cars I just go by so fast.
But you know, and I wanted to be like and
I had to cancel a dancers idea. They got grounding
Kramer Cracker Done show was a big new show that
(06:17):
was just Kramer and Cracker wasn't invited. He dodged one them.
Thinking about all my kids running around the neighborhood right now,
probably the streets different are a little older. So I've
got Jace who doesn't look across with Jolie, and so
I'm like, you can't just run brother across the street
like that, like without looking you like more of the
(06:38):
like Ramsey runs across the street to her, but like
around a cold a sax, don't worry about it. Yeah,
we're on the main like yeah, you are same, drive
like no, no, like a highway basic and they like
drive fast. And I'm like that parent that you're that one.
I'm the old lady in the neighborhood. That's like waving
my hand. Yeah. But it's like your kids live here.
(06:58):
We had so many kids that run around in here
that I just am like, you know, so I put
my little uh turtle, I love your turtle with the
flag in the middle of the street. You got one
to um. All I can think about right now is
I was not allowed to talk to boys on the phone.
It was fifth grade. I remember I was ten. Fifth grade.
(07:20):
A boy called this is back in the day when
like the answering machine. That was the worst. When you're
sitting for dinner and then all of a sudden, it's like, hey,
it's Sam just calling. And I'm like, Sam looked really
pretty today, choir, but go ahead, um. But Chris Blank
called me. I just remember, and I don't remember what
(07:44):
he wanted, but I remember my mom. Well, I went
to the other room to get it. I remember walking
in the hallway and her meeting me in the hallway.
I mean, like, why was he calling? And I made
up a lie like he needed something for school. Well,
she was listening the entire time on the other way
in Mine's not liar liar pants on fire? Yeah, Chris
(08:06):
l Guys, Maggie went out on Broadway the other day.
She did? She did you guys ready for a few
of that? I have not, so I only listened to
one of them. But are you ready? She's precious. Here
we go. I've got the videos too, And this is
gonna just be one second. I mean, this is I'm
gonna show this video. I mean she's she's a bridesmaid.
(08:26):
She's got some purple hair. Wait was she really a bridesmaid? Yeah?
I mean she's wearing the I feel like you can't
wear the t R if you're not a bridesmaid? What
I didn't if she was like posing maid? What do
you mean bridesmaid? Because this is the most okay, But
if you're in Nashville, this is a very undercover look.
If you didn't want to be noticed because a bridesmaid
(08:48):
except ath Carolina Eline, what is your biggest dick in
a relationship when they don't know how to clean up
after themselves in the dishwasher, put your close in the hammer, right,
it's not that difficult. I agree, don't you agree? I
do agree wholeheartedly. Payton. And my question is what is
(09:11):
a good agent? Get married? Oh? Pay good question? Pay In?
Do you know my gutens was it? Never? Never? Never? Run? Payton? No?
What is your I would say thirty two. That was
(09:33):
my first divorce. I mean I would say thirty two
or thirty five, Like I like thirty five, I feel
thirty five. I don't know, because there's things I liked
about being like well, having kids early, being married early,
but having kids early. Um, but i'd say, like twenty
eight to thirty. I still think I would have dined.
(09:55):
I want you to be like solidly in your thirties. Yeah,
I need a solid thirty two because yeah, the food.
But it also depends where you're at, right, So like
I wasn't fully there yet, but I don't think you
really get there till your thirties anyways. Maybe I don't know.
But then when you look a cat, well I was
like this at eighteen, so like you know, like old,
(10:16):
like acting grandma at the age of eighteen, but most
people are. I do think it just matters. I think
it matters what you know to be sure of about yourself. Yeah,
for sure. M like I I knew when I was
getting married the first time it was not the time
same and I look back and I'm like why, But
(10:38):
it was like such a smart choice, like to people's plans,
that was mine. Oh yep, staying on branded people. This
question is from from from from Broadway. Hi, I'm store
me up from South Carolina, and my question is way
(10:58):
in a relationship should you use are doing your partners laundry? Never? Ever?
Also never never, someone's gonna wrap that up never never
never a right three nevers And that was good from Broadway.
I like personally, like I have I done? No, I
haven't done Alan's laundry. H Allen strikes me as a
(11:18):
do it yourself first and he does his laundry, and
I think he's thrown mine in a few times. Oh
he did. He threw mine in and then he left
it kind of in a pile, the dry pile. And
I don't like the dry pile because then it's then
it's wrinkled. So I'm like in my mind, I'm like,
let's I didn't say anything because it's like great is
sweet thought at the same time, like I will just
rewash it. M go, don't touch my stuff. I shouldn't
(11:45):
be married. I don't. I'm probably just pregnant and tired.
But I really this person to his own laundry he
does now do it. I will I do all of
ours if his isn't there to do. But he's usually
in and out repacking so quick that he's like let
me to he just does allowed. I have a question though,
because you do the kids laundry? Do you do the
kids lundry? Yeah? Yeah, same obviously. Yeah, it'd be nice
(12:15):
if they would. I know you're still gonna say no
to this, but we have to do like double laundry,
so it would be nice if they picked up the
slack too. I'm about to cast my husband publicly go
work because he's like I caught us up on laundry
the other day and I was like, okay, dry pile,
heaping dry pile on top of like the laundry room counter,
(12:39):
and I was like, so that's not caught up. Caught
up to me is like those items are then in
their room and roy GBIV in the closet hanging that's
caught up. So those are done, but those are not folded,
and they're not put in a basket, and they're not
up to the next level. Mine get folded on the
kitchen table. Okay, Sota doesn't put him step put it away?
(13:00):
No no, no really. Now, if I'm like in the
middle of putting up a bunch of laundry and I say, hey,
can you help me take some of this up? Like
take he will. But in his defense, the girls are
pretty much the same size. They're literally like small medium,
you know whatever. It makes me more mad when he
puts it up, So I'm fine with that that I
would like it in the basket. But he can't even
separate the girls. He literally doesn't know who's who's and
(13:22):
the girls at all. Yeah, Like I find my t
shirts and loves pile and I'm just like, so that's
just gonna get frustrated. So I am thankful for the
folding though. That's nice. Yeah, the dry pile is like
all done. I was like, um, I go in and
Everest is like staring at me. Cool. Sometimes I'm guilty
of that with nixt laundry though, because I need to
move on from his and it's still in the dryer.
(13:42):
So sometimes i'll do the dry pile you dry pilot
sometimes only sometimes I appreciate No, it's not mean I
appreciate alan though. I'll sit down on the couch and
I'll start folding the kids clothes or my clothes or whatever,
and he immediately grabs something and I go no, no, no no, no, no,
no no no. He's like, let me help. He's like,
(14:02):
I'm just saying like no. And then now I don't
say no, I'm just like good, like sure, like if
that's so sweet. He doesn't have to I'm not asking
him to, but I just I appreciate the well. And
I think at the end of the day, like if
they're willing to help and they're trying to help, even
if they don't know the way, that we should appreciate that.
And I know it's not easy to do all the time,
especially for me. I think it's it's uh, I like,
(14:28):
and this is something I'll say too, where I like,
like he's seen in the mornings, that's the very first
thing I do as I empty the dishwasher, very first thing,
same human because I don't like a dish in my
saying right. And I know we talked about this before,
but um, so that's the very first thing that I do.
So that way the kids can then put their their
stuff in the in the dishwasher. Um. And you know,
(14:51):
one of the mornings I had was just like running
late or whatever. That was the first thing that he did.
So I was like he it's like he saw like
my routine and like I was just like oh. I
ended up being like thank you for that, like you
would you saw what I do and then you yeah,
I did it without even like asking her, because that's
the something I don't like when people ask questions. Just
just do it because when you ask, I'm like, no, no no,
(15:12):
I got it. Yeah, always I got it, and then
I'm tired. I got it. But what I mean to
say is when I say I got it, I mean
yes please. Yeah. When I say I got it'd be
like ike out yeah, yeah, yeah yeah. When I say
I got it, I got it, that's yeah. That's that's
where you have to ask for I'm trying to get
better by asking. I think we should get better at
(15:34):
saying yes please. Yeah. I'm trying really hard because you
almost can't get mad at the other person if they oh, yeah,
no they don't. And then but then you're frustrated because
it's like, but I really wanted you to do do. I'm
up in third times a charm and by the third baby,
I'm just gonna be like, yes, I'll take any help
you can give me. I thought you talking about my marriages.
Oh no, this is the final marriage? Oh amen, mine marriage?
(15:56):
Or do you have any y? No? It was like, no, honey,
I'm settled into mine. How has anyone had therapy with
Amy lately? You guys are so much to unpack. I
haven't even processed. Huh. Oh. I got in the car.
It was one of those where I just got in
(16:16):
the car, very grateful, heart very heavy, very grateful, very empowering,
very tiring. And I got in the car and I
didn't even want the air the sound of the fanom.
I just drove and drank water and was like, okay,
Like it's a lot my voyage of not trusting people
(16:36):
or men, right, right? Did you do MDR today? I
did a lot of big MDAR. If I could frame
it for you guys, I would frame it. Maybe by
next week I can frame it it was just a lot.
Well let's put a little pin pin in that one
because we can. Yeah, something came up. I had therapy
yesterday with Amy and I cried a lot. I cried,
(17:00):
but it was something where yeah, it was just hard.
So anything else, Nope, we'll pin it too. Let's pin it.
Let's pin it. It's a lot to digest, like that's
the hardest part and a lot of like big revelations.
But then also just like, holy cow, I'm writing a
note for for ourselves to unpin therapy talk. Yeah, therapy,
(17:26):
but we're gonna switch gears because we have Heidi Pratt
coming on and I know you were a big Hills watcher.
I was. I watched uh some of it. I was
a Laguna Hills. Yeah, you know, we have Jason Waller
coming on, like he's gonna be sitting on the couch
with us. It's not crushy how I feel. It's just
(17:47):
I get excited Jason. Yeah, definitely not crushy. No no, no,
you're married, right. But I mean also, even if I
never had a cry, I don't have a lot of
celebrity crush It's fun. Fact, do you have one? I
had Matthew McConaughey, who I did too the greatest, And
then I heard he was stinky stinky. I didn't believe whatever,
(18:08):
It's probably just a rumor, but I needed something to
break my healthy obsession, so that was fine. Can we
just say something about the natural deodor and thing for
a second. It doesn't work well, So I'm really stinky,
Like I'm a naturally stinky person. I still have like
PTSD from X because I was He'd like, I'm like,
I know, I just feel like I never like so
I'd always like I know, I'd literally never noticed it
all the time. Like he I don't know, maybe he
(18:29):
just like hated me so much, but like I like
even my sense disgusted him. But like, I mean that
was like to the point where like Alan's like you
always smell so good, and I'm in my mind, I'm like,
are you just saying that because I stink, Like because
I'm just so ingrained that, like I have a bad
odor or something. So I'm like constantly like putting on
deodor and like all the time. And um So, but
(18:51):
there was this girl that worked, do't I don't I
say this? She was um at the house helping and
she wore a natural doutor. And again, some natural deodorants
might work for some people, but a lot of times
if you have that stink, what I've noticed is you're
just gonna it's gonna come out like pregnant. I it's
(19:14):
work well, and so yeah, and so I smell and
I'm like, it's to the point where you can't even
You're like, like you can't breathe. And it's like and
I'm very like smelly sensitive. And Jason's the same thing.
He's like, mom, what stinks? And I'm like, But then
when the person link sits on my couch and puts
(19:35):
their arm like I'm the thing, and I was like
and I was done, and I had to I had
to let the person go because I stunk. I couldn't say, like,
can you put on deodorant? How do how do you
have that conversation. It's interesting to me when people can't
smell themselves. I smell myself when I'm stinky, and then
I usually I would say, oh, I'm probably stinky. I'm
so paranoid about it. I'm not even that stinky. Really,
(19:57):
I just do my thing, and you will not me
doing natural deodorant because I have just I tried every
single one of them. I did three years natural deodorant.
None of it works for me my body chemistry. Yeah,
well that just went. Whyever we even get to deodorant.
Matthew McConaughey was not stinky. I don't know that Pert
(20:20):
ever smelled him in real life. Given the opportunity, I
would have loved the opportunity at once upon a time.
But do you have a celebrity crush? I used to
owe him and he's talked about that. But I don't
have a whole lot either. Yeah, it takes a lot
for me. Yeah, well, anybody anyways, moving on, we're gonna
get heidion. She married her celebrity crush, she sure did,
(20:43):
and we're gonna talk all things. Well. Hello, hey girl,
Hey did you just get didn't work out? You're in
your cute little like matching yoga set. Thank you. I'm
(21:04):
trying to get it in, but it's hard with feeding
and running around with this baby. And how's the baby now?
He's four months? Are you sleeping? I'm more than with Gunner.
So if I get like two hours straight three, I'm good.
It's crazy how we get so sleep deprived that I
feel like once we can get like a good two
(21:24):
or three hour chunk, then we start to feel like
we could run for office. Like it's like I got it,
no big deal. Spencer's like, oh, I woke up once
last night. I'm like, who are you talking to? Hi?
What do you mean? That's when I say to my husband, respectfully,
stop talking. Stop talking, girl. Thank you so much for
coming on the podcast. So a funny story we like,
(21:46):
and you will not remember this, but we met. Oh god,
how many years ago is that? I mean god, I'm
sam almost forty. I was like maybe twenty four, Like
I mean a long, long, long, long time ago. We
were at some club on sunset. It was you and Spencer,
and then someone set me and Brody up on a
(22:08):
blind date. So we're at this dinner and it was
like the worst. You were so sweet, but it was
the worst blind date ever with me and Brody, Like
the absolute worst, and the worst thing about it was
Probably one of my most embarrassing moments was that night,
because I was like, just we were not vibing at all,
(22:29):
and I'm like, he said he said something to me.
I was like, that's it, I'm leaving. But there were
mirrors on the walls. Okay, so I kind of get
up in what we had already finished our dinner, right
and like you guys were like somewhere or whatever. We
were sitting out like in a booth area or whatever,
and he had said something to me, and I was
like whatever, Like I'm out of here. So I go
(22:51):
marching towards the exit sign. Well, little do I know,
the exit sign walks me right in. It's the reflection.
It was all a mirror, and so I slam I
walk right into like a mirror. It's horrible. Was that
(23:13):
it was the one lacross from like the Shell station
on like Laurel Canyon, was the one right on the
right set. So when you'd come, if you're coming away
from the valley, knows the other one like the other
privilege privilege, yeah or whatever, Like it was like that was,
oh my gosh, it was so embarrassing. And that's the
last I saw of you or not did you just
(23:34):
turn around and walk the other way. I did not
look back to see if someone saw me. Oh, but
I'm pretty sure someone saw me walk right into that mirror.
I felt like I was in a funny house, Like
I was thinking that a fun house. Fun house, yeah,
funny whatever, fun Okay, But the transition to two have
you found it to be difficult or where are you at?
(23:56):
Because I struggled with the transition to two And how
old is Gunner? Let's start there, Okay, So Gunner is five,
which I was at first really concerned that he got
to be too far of an age difference because my
sister and I are three years and I wanted them
to kind of kind of like grow up closer and
to have each other in the house longer. But five
(24:17):
years has been great. I can't imagine having him younger
because Gunner is a lot, but you know, like he
wants so much of our attention and we've given it
to him so much for five years, and writer he's
fitting right in. So I think when he gets a
little older and there's more of a schedule, it will
be great. But this newborn stage has been a little challenging,
and Spencer's really stepped out and been so great at
(24:39):
doing a lot with Gunner. But I feel guilty that
I'm not there as much with him, because like I'm
the one who woke up with him all the time,
and I'm the one who would make sure to put
him to bed last. And you know, I just had
so much in my life revolving around Gunner. So Gunner's
done a really good job transitioning. But I feel like
for me, it's just it is hard being fouled in
the two directions. But I love it too, It's sure,
(25:01):
it's I love chaos and challenges obviously, Well girl, I
mean you've lived You've lived a lot of that very publicly, right,
so I feel like you're probably an expert on it.
And I'm curious, like with all the you know, new
streaming platforms and you know, the people doing the podcast
and talking about the hills, and it is it hard
(25:22):
for you to have to kind of hear or relive
things or you kind of like whatever, that's the past
and this is who I am today, and like, I'm
not going to let that affect where I've gone. I
think it's both because obviously, when you're doing like a
recap of a show, you're kind of having to like
go back and live things and moments that you wouldn't.
(25:43):
But in my everyday life it doesn't affect me because
I have the friends that I have, I have my marriage.
I mean, we've been together for sixteen years. You know,
we have two kids. I have a great family, so
my everyday life, it doesn't affect me. But then when
sometimes people bring it up where you have to talk
about certain things, obviously God brings it up. Are you pregnant?
(26:04):
I am so pregnant. I feel so extra pregnant in
this moment. Actually, I feel stuck in my body. Is
it obvious that I'm stuck in my body hiding because
I I wouldn't even know unless you were rocking and
holding your stomach, because from here pregnant at all. But
then I'm seeing the rocking and well, the baby is
like really in this moving stage that I just feel
(26:25):
like one of us is dedicated to you and the
other one of us is having a full blown party
in my abdomen. So I'm trying so hard congraduations. We're
not finding out it's our third So this has been
really fun, but I'm it's interesting because I have a
four year old boy. Janna and I our girls are
three weeks apart and our boys are three months apart,
(26:47):
so we live very similar life. So I need her
to catch up with me and get on the third quickly.
So we're not so distant, but my son will be
almost five. So it's interesting to hear you talk about
Gunner like, you know, because they are like the little
loves of our lives. My daughter is older and I'm
obsessed with my son, and I just can't imagine having
another boyfriend. So that's got to open your heart in
(27:07):
a different way. It's so true. This morning, Spencer said something.
He was like, you're not stressing me out or whatever,
because he just got his blood taken and he's like
too stressed out. And I was like, you know, that's
an internal conversation. I don't mean you like saying that
I am stressing you out and that you're not stressed
out and anyway, right or Gunner goes up and punches
Spencer and it's like, don't talk to my mom like that.
(27:30):
That's right, and in my mind and I try to
be like, I don't think you just stick up for me,
but thank you. And I was like this form, I'm
not saying anything, Just get in the car, thank you.
I love you. Come that's right. I'll be his client.
That's fine. I love it with you, with you and Spencer,
you know, being married for sixteen years, so wait, that
together for how long? Then together for sixteen, married for fourteen,
(27:52):
Mary Fortune, sixteen fortune. Okay, but I feel like when
you guys got married, there was so much like, oh,
this isn't gonna last. So now that you hit like
your fourteen are you kind of like middle finger to people?
I always felt that way. So I always felt like
I had nothing to prove with Spencer, and I just,
you know, I understand why people have thought that way
(28:13):
because on camera, and we were paid to have like
a very tumultuous relationship on camera, and so I see
why people thought that. But our real life was just
so different. So I knew our real relationship that we had,
like I would never have put up with any of that.
I would never have been in a relationship or like
my fiance is flirting with a girl in the club,
(28:33):
you know, like I have a zero tolerance policy. So
in real life it was just completely different. So it's
almost like we went on camera, you know, which obviously
you're an actress and you guys know, you know, it's
it's kind of acting, but then it bleeds into your
real life with people thinking that, and then you're really
kind of like that, well too far, You know. So anyways,
(28:57):
it was a balance. But my real life, I always
how we were and how I felt, and I just
knew it was a one time soulmate marriage that we
would you know, we'd have forever. So I just always
felt that way. But what area do you guys struggle
in the most? Like when you're like, oh, we keep
coming back to this one issue. Parenting is definitely tricky,
(29:21):
you know. It just takes your relationship to a whole
new level. So it's like, well, not only do I
need to confront you about this, I have to advocate
for this little child, you know. And you both want
the right thing, and you both have different ways of
doing things. You know. I'm from a small town in
Colorado with my mom who is like very strict, zero policy,
you know, and Spencer wants to be fun dad. And
(29:43):
then when you're fun dad, the child doesn't give you
the same amount of respect that they're getting long because
I am not going to take things, you know. So
he's like he only listens to you, and I'm like, well,
maybe you should not be so fun. And also parent
is the most challenging. But I had to have a
conversation when we first became parents, and it becomes more
(30:07):
relevant every year, is that we're the team. We have
some kind of division, we need to talk about it
later or something like that, but for the benefit of
our child too, like we need to stand together. And
he's really come around to that. That's great. Spencer is
fun dad. Fun dad is really into hummingbirds. Can we
talk about it at all? Are we just not gonna
(30:28):
do that? I mean, I'm fascinated watching these videos, Like no,
it's crazy, like what is he doing? He's like a whisperer.
What is he even doing? Heidi? You know, it was
actually it's like a divine intervention because when I found
out that I was pregnant, we had one hummingbird at
our old house. We found this hummingbird nest and it
was so symbolic, like, oh, we're having a baby and
(30:49):
we just found this nest. And then one got eaten
and one lived and we had to rescue the hummingbird
and it was this whole thing. And then we moved
here and there were a lot of hummingbirds at this house,
and so Spencer already knew so much about them, and
he makes hummingbird nectar every day, which is sugar water
because the red dyet is poisonous for them actually like
(31:09):
kills them. So he makes it fresh every day and
then they just come and then he goes out there
with his feeders and they love it. And now Gunner's
in on it. It's like a whole operation. White you're
up too, I know, it's like a whole thing. And
you never and they get in the house and then
you have to like capture the hummingbird, but the right way,
and it's like, it's just it's the way I don't
know about them in the house. It's interesting because I
(31:31):
was a hills watcher, so Spencer was always the villain. Yeah,
And I'm like, oh, well, you just can't they get
they all have to shut up now because I always
the hummingbird whisper. It's like you, I mean, what is
more opposite day than the villain the guy that's literally
holding hummingbird babies in his hand like he obviously has
good energy. The hummingbirds are Yeah, so we shut that down.
(31:52):
I love it. Do you do you even like talking
about the hills um Yes and no. I think that
love the ad by the way. I appreciate the and
I've got an ant I have an ampersand on it
because I always think that it's not a butt, it's
always an ant and I love you, love your ants
totally thank you for the acknowledgment. I strategically also use
(32:13):
the ants. Yeah, it's a twofold. It's tricky because people
are so team Lauren and they're kind of brainwashed to like,
no matter what she did, there was never a problem,
and I was the bad guy and that's how it was.
So it's really ingrained in a lot of people's mind.
But then interestingly enough, with TikTok and all this new generation,
(32:35):
a lot of people watch it with a different perspective
and they're like, whoa, who is this Lauren girl? And
you know, it's definitely changed it. And then also it's
hard with Spencer because I understand why people get worked
up or think the way that they did because it
was such a fake relationship. I mean, like some things
in the beginning were real, like you know, real relationships
have rockyness. Thank god they didn't show me being like
(32:57):
a player also because as I totally was, And it
just gets tricky. But at the same time, I'm so
thankful over the Hills and it was such a blessing,
and I met the love of my life. And I'll
always have a place in my heart for Lauren, and
I appreciate the friendship we did have and what she
did do for me and letting me be on our show.
(33:19):
So it was such a fun moment in time, and
also it was very challenging. Sure, if there's I mean,
you know, obviously it's not good to have regrets, right,
but if there's, is there a moment that you can
go back to and go, I really wish I would
have done this differently, or I wouldn't have done or
you know, not do this. I wish I never brought
(33:41):
my family on the hills. We should have had a
no family policy. I didn't see that happening the way
it did. It just caused a lot of miscommunication between
like my mom and I and my sister and I
because the producers would tell you one thing and then
you'd all kind of go in with the plan. I'm like, Okay, yeah,
you can say this, and you know, because in real life,
my mom loves Spencer and there was never a problem.
(34:02):
But then when we started like acting out that she
didn't like him, then it was kind of like, wait
a minute, Mom, why did you say that? And she's like,
I don't said to say something, and then it caused
it's actual turmoil when there was no problem, and then
it just led to a lot of unnecessary, real hurts.
So I think that if I could do one thing,
it would have just been not including It was tricky though,
(34:24):
because the producers were like, well, you guys don't have
a storyline and you're not going to get paid, and
you're not going to be on the show because no
one will film with you because Laurence told all the
casts not to film with you guys anymore. So you've
got to bring your mom on and or find something.
So I was just put in a hard position, especially
at twenty and not having a good not having an
Asian manager, lawyer, not anyone. I mean, Spencer was my soundboard.
(34:48):
I'm like, okay, what are we complaying? You know, So
it was hard not having a team or anyone to
help guide us through that time. Right as you were
saying that, I question him. To my mind, I'm like,
do I ask it? Because if someone asked me the question,
I would have a hard time. I don't know if
i'd answer it. As well, from being on a show, right,
(35:12):
So it's like I think back to, like, you know,
one of my shows that I was on, if there
was a person from that show that you'd be fine
with never talking to ever again, Like the one person
that you were like would would never want to talk
to again and be like totally fine with it, Like
if there was one that you could say, I mean,
I'm fine with never talking to a few people. One
(35:38):
is there a narrowing people out? I know that's the thing.
I was like, what I even narrow that because it's
like I know mine, like you know, and so it's
like it's interesting because it's like it's not it's not
even like a mean girl thing. It's just like I
choose to not let that kind of come into my
life again and cause or me to feel X Y
and Z and you were both like twenty doing the shows,
(35:59):
like it's a different lifetime. Who's yours. We'll see. I've
got a few I like, I know I do I
have I do have one from from from One Tree Hill,
But I should answer it, yeah, answer I know. I
never if she did, I would, oh, she's going to show.
(36:23):
I'd be fine never ever talking to um A few
people on that show. So Lauren, I'm fine with never
talking to Lauren again. We have gone our separate ways.
Our lives are completely different. Um, so much has happened.
I'm fine with never talking to her again. I'm fine
with not talking to her little minions again, like, um,
you know right, been there, So I'm fine with that.
(36:48):
I'm fine with you know, I love Kristen Cavalary, so
thankfully I do talk to her. Um. Yeah, and the reboot,
I'd be fine not talking to like Ni Like most
the cast, I sortly fine. I'm gonna take us to
(37:16):
a healthier place. Okay, all right. I tried giving her
and I tried to rescue this night. Is there anyone
that you knew super super well during filming that you
are like most proud of the person they are today? Good?
Good question. Um. I love Jen Bunny. She and I
(37:37):
have been my best friends since I was nineteen. We
had a very similar thing like falling out with Lauren,
and Lauren you know, kind of cut her off and gave,
you know, treated her in a really unfair way, especially
being best friends since they were in like preschool. Um,
and she has become like a doctor and an incredible mom.
(37:58):
I mean, she has all these accolades and I actually
she has like a book coming out. So she's one
of my closest friends. And I was so proud of
her for the life that she did. She went to USC,
She's incredibly smart, she's so sweet, she's a great wife,
great mom. So I'm very proud of her. I like that.
It's interesting to me to have you frame it. I
(38:20):
don't want to pot start here, but this is something
I've never quite heard it put this way that it
was Lauren's show. Oh yeah, well wasn't it. Well never
I would just see like some well it was obviously
a main character. I don't know that like the viewers
really saw it. No, we didn't see it. Like to me,
you were just as much a main character as Lauren
(38:41):
was as Audrina, Like you know what I mean, Like
there was some of it was more dominantly obviously spaced
towards her and times, but like, I remember you just
as much as I remember her. But I'm going to
back it up though, for you sex in the City
who shows it. Wow, that's hard for me because we
all know how Bradshaw I am. So I'm saying, so
it's like she's like the Bradshaw of the Hills because
(39:02):
I look at it and go, wait a minute, No,
I didn't watch the show religiously. I saw some episodes,
and I would say that she was the main character. Interesting. Yeah,
so she was the narrator. It was her spin off
I'm gonna be all about Lauren, and that was part
of that's true. I guess that was part of the
problem when we all had to start having more storylines, like,
it wasn't supposed to be that way. It wasn't supposed
(39:24):
to be like half the show about Spencer and I
half the show about Lauren. And that became a problem
for her and her team too. They're like, this is
Lauren's show. And at a point MTV was like, well,
you know, because Lauren's like, I'm going to quit the show,
um if Heidie and Spencer are on it. And I
think that was season three and so MTV told her
to walk and they're like, well, a show without Heidie
(39:45):
and Spencer anymore. And that became a really big division
in within the show. Well, that's jealousy anytime you're done
with ego. That's I mean, that's because she wasn't bringing
enough of the what drama or whatever it was. I mean,
that's her own, Like I would say, we all remember
the mascara dripping moment. I well remember, And that was
(40:07):
what was so unfortunate, is like I'm such a team
player and I'm such a best friend rider die that
I just want like the best for everyone, you know,
And I don't know. I wasn't in her position, and
it wasn't my show and I wasn't the narrator. But
I'm just not really like that. So when she was
like you need to stop dating Spencer and like all
these hard things that started happening, I was like, wait
a minute. You had a boyfriend that I didn't like
(40:28):
that I had to live with for a year, and
I would never have said to you like stop dating him,
or we're not going to be friends or I don't
want to hear about him. I'm like, that's the time
you need me the most as a friend. That's when
I need to step up. That's when you need your girl,
That's when you need a shoulder to cry on at
any time. Like I'm here for you whenever. However much
time you want to spend with him, that's great, And
(40:48):
I would stay at the apartment like half the time
and really strategically make sure to have time with her
because she did just go through a huge breakup a
few months before, and you know, she was going through
a hard time or you know, had just had gone
through a hard time. So I spent like half my
first Valentin's Dave with Spencer with Lauren, and she was
(41:08):
still mad at me, and I was like, this is
getting out of control, Like I'm sorry, There's not much
more I can do at this point, and she just
it was really unfortunate, and I was like, I didn't
even think you were like this, and you know, that's
that was the real division in our friendship, and so
on cameras she started like kind of doing things and
(41:30):
saying things and I had no idea. She was saying
to MTV like I don't want hide on the show
anymore and stuff like that. So it was unfortunate, the
whole fallout of our friendship. And I know we were
young and things like that, but it just I would
never have been a friend like that to her. Sure,
that's tough. That's I'm curious. Like with forgiveness too. We
were talking about this one of our episodes, like where
(41:52):
what's your stance on it, Like do you think is
it forgetting? Like do you forgive or like what? Yeah? Yeah,
And I think forgiveness is more for yourself, you know,
Like I have love for Laura, and I really do.
I appreciate all the time that we had. And you know,
there's other people in my life too that I've hurt
me as much or more than her. And it's all
(42:13):
about moving forward in life because forgiveness only makes you
feel bad. I'm sure that person doesn't even care anymore,
you know. So I think forgiveness is super important for yourself.
And you know, obviously I mean not obviously, but I
also I am a Christian. I'm pretty spiritual, and I
think that it's just a good thing to do, and
I want to teach my kids to be that way
(42:34):
and I want to model that myself. And sometimes forgiveness
is constant. It's not like a one time, Oh I
forgive you and now everything's fine. Like sometimes you get
those feelings again and you get angry and you have
to pray about it or talk about it or what
meditate however people do, and it's like, Okay, actually I
wish that person the best. I'm going to let that go.
Maybe they're hurt, there's other things going on. So I
(42:57):
think forgiveness is one of the most important parts of life,
and it helps you to move forward in other relationships
and it helps just it only helps what also factories,
you know, boundaries are also really good. So with forgiveness
does come boundaries, right, We're a big fan of boundaries
in the share what do you do when you get stuck?
Like how does Heidi? How does Heidie get out of
a rut? When you know you're down about something or
(43:19):
motherhood or things didn't even get that you know, show
you on it, or like what do you what do
you do to go okay? Like I'm gonna be okay.
I'm very big into prayer, so even if it's like
two minutes, so I'll just go pray about it. I
think crying is great, I think so baptisting to cry
and let it out, but just to take those that time,
(43:41):
even with the kids, Like if I'm getting frustrated or
i feel like, you know, if Gunner's having a tantrum
and Rikers crying and Spencer saying something, I'm just like
need to take a deep breath, let this out of
my body, Like when you start feeling it, it's just
time to kind of a little so care. So I
think quick self care is an important thing because sometimes
(44:03):
you don't have ten minutes to yourself. You know, it's like, okay,
you just need thirty seconds to breathe. What is your
top self care at this point? Like I know your postpartum,
You're you've got five year old Gunner, You've got Spencer,
who is a character in himself, Like, you've got a lot,
You're living in a frat house essentially, So tell me,
(44:26):
tell me if you get like five to ten minutes,
we're praying, like is it running? Is it? Like? What
is what is it for you? Right now? That just
feels like okay. Back to Heidi. My favorite thing to
do is be a nature So for me, it's like
taking the dogs on a walk is the best because
we live right by a trail and I can just
like be up in the mountains quickly, So that is
(44:49):
really important for me. I try to do that every day. Also,
I can take Gunner up there and then he's like
playing with sticks and trees, and then I can also
just like look at the clouds and relax and right
you're sleeping on me, so that's important for me. It's
just being outside even for a little bit, and then
I only get a short amount of prayer time, so
(45:10):
I just try to do that even for like two
minutes a day. But like you're saying right now, self cares,
it's a little tricky. I'm trying to work out again, too,
So three days a week, I'm trying to work out
with a trainer and have that time, and I have
a babysitter come because I don't want to rely on
Spencer being able to deal with the baby crying because
(45:30):
he like freaks out. So I'm like, all right, I
don't need to deal with you and a baby crying
and trying to work out, So self care sometimes it's
just having someone come hold the baby. That preventative. It's
preventative resentment disorder, is what I'm trying to. Like, I
hire the help so I don't have to depend on you,
so I can keep liking you and I can still
work out. Okay, right, I'm with you. I can't remember
(45:54):
if I said this on the show or I know
I said it in therapy, but I've been struggling lately
with prayer because I've been kind of, you know, frustrated
with certain things like work wise, and so someone I
think it was my therapist, she was like, you know,
just asked like she's like, be really direct with your
prayer with God. And so I I went up to
my new house that's being built and I was standing
(46:15):
there and you know, I started to pray. But then
when I when I was praying, I was like, hey, God,
like you know God, like I really like I would
love this. But then I start I switched and I
told my therapist. I was like, I stopped praying because
but then I was like because I said, but I'm
so grateful for my kids, and it's like I'm so
grateful for this, And so then I felt bad asking
for something because I've already been blessed with so much.
So I'm like, how ungrateful am I? Then I'm asking
(46:36):
for something even more when you've blessed me with this.
So then I just spent like fifteen minutes like fighting
myself and then be like all right, well whatever, like
just do you just do you when you want to
do you? And then like I was like it's gonna
be on your time anyways, Okay, cool, Bye, like, but
thanks for everything, like did you even talk to me?
Because it feels like you had a one side of conversation.
But I like was really battling with like asking for
(46:56):
like you know, asking God for it, but then also
like being like, but thank you so much for everything
you've given me. So then I felt bad asking for more,
like you how greedy of you? But then my therapist goes, well,
why do you feel like you don't deserve more? And
then I started like crying. That was like my you know,
my whole belief, like well I don't I don't deserve
the happy ending. I don't get the happy ending, like
(47:17):
that just doesn't happen, like something will fall through, something
will like not work like. And then she's like, but
what if you can you can be grateful and also
ask for more too, and so I yeah, and and
but I would really like have found myself struggling with that,
like with prayer. You know, sometimes I have been there myself,
and also God has like convicted my heart sometimes to
(47:39):
not ask for things, like I've gone to prayer and
I'm like, all right, I need to ask for this.
And then sometimes like when I have felt it as
you're saying it's felt not right, Like, wait a minute,
maybe I just need to pause and be in a
season or just have a few days of gratitude and
then come back to it. So I've also done that.
I'm like, okay, Actually, God just convicted me in January.
(48:00):
He was like, just do a month of gratitude prayers.
Because I always ask, I'm a big asker. I'm like,
all right, Lord, oh maybe we're not lottery. Does I
want it? And I'll do good things? You know? You know,
so I'm like my mom nade the new house, come
on talking. So I can't handle you. But sometimes also
(48:24):
God has convicted me, like why don't you just take
a few days or even like this moment and just
relax and just grateful Because what God can work on
in your heart with just gratitude sometimes leads you to
a different ask. Right, So maybe whatever you're asking needs
to be tweaked a little bit and by going back
(48:45):
to gratitude and just praising and like I'll be like,
thank you for my toes, thank you for the air
and the oxygen. Thank you we're not having a new
heal or war right now, you know, thank you. My
kids have food, so sometimes it is those bags six
that God just works on your heart in mysterious ways, Right,
That's what's so cool about God, Like we don't know
(49:05):
why he does things or what we're supposed to pray for.
But sometimes it's just also an inner peace, Like maybe
you're not having peace while you're asking for something and
He just needs like to It's like an adjustment with
a chiropractor. Maybe just needs to crack this little thing
and then have you come an hour later. Maybe it's
a few days later. I don't know, but I think
(49:27):
that's interesting. Like when you're starting to feel conflicted with prayer,
I think that's because that's God. Sometimes it's just like
be still, like I am God, I got this, I
know what you want. I have something better coming for you.
So maybe I don't know, but it is always interesting
to me. I love that, and thank you for speaking
on it too. I love we Actually the guest before
(49:49):
you on another episode we just talked about her faith,
and it's just I love that people are talking about it.
So I like conversational prayer too. That's something like I
think we miss. I think we've think it has to
be so officially started, so officially ending and so like
I'll just be in my kitchen and I'm just like
I feel sad, and I don't even necessarily ask for anything.
I'm just like I want to tell you because I
(50:10):
know you know, but also just because I want you
to like do whatever, like so it's just like kind
of conversational. I'm not it's like all day. I actually
learned that when I was going through my divorce because
I felt like lonely and I was like I kind
of want to date God, which sounds weird, but then
I would just be like, all right, what do I
want to have for like, you know, just like kind
of conversational and it feels a little less official, and
then you don't feel like you have to request anything
(50:32):
or maybe pinpoint of feeling and you can just say
like this is it, like the beautiful surrender over and
over again. I'm totally with you on that, Like Jesus
is my best friend. That's how I feel, you know.
And it says like like you're saying, I always am
like the love of my life, You're the lover of
my soul because nobody knows me deeper and more real
(50:54):
and less judgmental, Like that's the thing I don't with
Christianity or any spirituality. People are like so critical of it.
It's like you're missing the whole point. It's not to
be judgmental and critical like you're missing it, Like what
on one, maybe go work on yourself there, but like
maybe start a genesis. I don't know. Jecking got me
okay on a major projections. I got something going on
(51:17):
with God. Okay, we got our own deal here. But
I'm with that all day. I'm just like, all right, God,
help me find a parking spot, like I have this
praper park. I'm like, however, I'm going through it like
it doesn't happen Diesel official. It's more like a relationship.
It's just like your friend hanging out with you. You know.
I love it. Well, Heidi, thank you so much for
coming on. I adore you. So. I'm glad we've met
(51:39):
now in this stage of our lives and not me
running into mirrors, mirror, not baby bird Janna hitting the mirror.
I cannot wait to bring this up to Brodie too.
I'm gonna go yeah, buddy, yeah, and we're all in
better places for what was so nice. Thank you guys
(52:03):
for having me on and anytime you want mom talk anything,
I'm fully here so I love it precious, all right,
Thanks girl, appreciate you. Bye okay by girl hie girl
Wine Down with Janet Kramer and I Heart Radio Podcast.
All Right, guys, catch my breath? All right, are you
good there? KB? Whoa thirty weeks you guys were closing
in downs the gun. Yeah, because you can technically, I
mean technically technically I've had friends. Okay, what was it,
twenty four weeks? She just get dry breast one? No,
(00:24):
I filled them in. Thanks for noticing. She looks really pretty.
She has good makeup? Did good makeup? I need you
look really refreshed, like you look like yourself still, just
like very refreshed version, which is my favorite kind of
makeup for people. I just got some new just like yeah,
like moisturize her anyway. Thanks. Yeah, I was just like sorry.
(00:46):
It was the first time I looked at you, and
I was like, all right, I like it. Really sorry
back to you, KB, Apologies were taking that away from you.
It's a big moment. No, it's just a big body.
Uh No, I was saying, because we've gosh, well, how
how young were those twins that are people? Twenty four
micro which is my girl. Yeah, they had like a
(01:07):
zero or like a two percent, and but they both survived.
I shouldn't be sorry. I should This has been a no.
But I know, but I'm saying, but like, at this point,
your baby could survive. I feel really like there is
a point in pregnancy where you get to where you
just started a little deeper. Yeah, a little until you
got the stairs and then you're back out of breath
again and then you get out of breath. Yeah, but
(01:28):
it's good, so good. This has been my most um
reassuring baby of the three. Real love the four really
but um yeah, because I it moves so much. Oh so,
I never wonder if if it's okay in there. I
think she's like, hey, just so you know, like, I'm here, Mom,
I'm here. Danna always thinks it's a girl. It's for
sure a girl, Like I will get a boy. I
(01:50):
will put money on it. That's a girl. Are you
a good guesser? Mmm? I mean I have a fifty
fifty shots, right. I usually am wrong, So whatever I
guess is usually a sit for people. That's why I
wonder if you're like, yeah, I'm undefeated. What were you guessing? Oh?
I think it's a girl too. I've been correct with
my own children, but everybody else is I'm horrible. Oh interesting, Yeah,
(02:12):
I feel like I can like call It's like my
sense of direction. You know direction you do. Thank you
every time we're out of town. Just trust me, I
know where I'm going. Thank you. Don't even meet a map,
I just sniff it out. We're all trying to get
the you know, it's like it's this way, guys. I
don't know. I've just always been you know why. It's
(02:34):
because I lived in the boonies from all of my
friends and at that time, that was pre map quest.
I try to figure out how to get to figure
it out. It was pre map quest, Yeah, print it
out just to figure it out. No, I think it
was like so I was the oldest of the drivers
and so I think it was. I remember printing it out,
like going it going to someone's house. But it was
(02:56):
like very new. Yeah, like because I was like having
to write out mapst got me in the biggest trouble
of my life. What happened. So my best friend Julie
Cooper and I Mattie, she is still my best friend.
Shout out to UK. I've never heard of her territorial
here for it. So we printed out we were going
(03:18):
to sneak off to Michigan State oh uh huh, which
is like not like me. I get very nervous. I'm
a rule follower. And we printed up the directions from
her house to Michigan State and left them on the
printer and her mom was like, you're going to go
to Michigan State tonight and we were like, no, no way,
and she like holds up the paper, what is this for?
(03:38):
And I was like uh oh, and we were busted
and then we were forbidden to see each other for
like ever, isn't that senior? A senior senior in high school?
Do you ever have Do you have a defining moment
from childhood or something? Because mine came up just a
couple days ago and I was walking with the kids,
like I remembered something from our child hood that I've
(04:01):
just I've it's always like it's it's just an interest story,
just kind of like that where you get caught, Okay, okay,
so it's where you get caught, yeah, and I got
caught as a kid, but it's I mean, it's years
is years is better, but it's I was the same
mind for Kat can think about hers, but I me
and my girlfriend Lindsay Crocker. Who did you met her. Yeah,
(04:24):
I've never met her, so she's acceptable. Yeah, she's she
came on the best one time. She's I mean, I
mean we're not like you know, it was Lindsay Crocker.
You're not like me and you go ahead there. It
was Lindsay Crocker and Mary Dodge, and I was kind
of always like so it was like me and Lindsay
were the closest and then when there was the three
of us, I was the outside. Okay, she was also
(04:45):
close to Mary too, long story short, and Lindsay I
was probably Jolie's age, like seven, six or seven. We
wanted to do a dance show for our neighborhood and
put on a dance like in the common area. So
days on brand, are you okay? So I had we
had made these flyers. We came up with this amazing
(05:07):
dance in her basement of course perfect and my I
wasn't allowed to cross the street like without a parent,
and so what I did, and so my because we
were had to hand out the flyers, right, I mean,
when I go to the neighbor's house, like to give
the flyers. Like, so my mom found out that you know,
(05:29):
she saw the flyer in the other like in the mailbox,
I think, or whatever, and I got grounded, and um,
we never did our dance. But you know what's funny
is I never really canceled it, so I don't even
know that. I still wonder if anyone showed up, huge group,
everyone in hand, wondering where. But I just remember getting
(05:54):
like I couldn't cross the street. And so yesterday or
the other day, when I was walking with the kids,
I said, please stop at the stop sign, but they
had then run across the street and gone home, and
I was like, don't ever do that again. I was like,
without mommy, because these cars I just go by so fast.
But you know, and I wanted to be like and
I had to cancel a dancers idea. They got grounding
Kramer Cracker Done show was a big new show that
(06:17):
was just Kramer and Cracker wasn't invited. He dodged one them.
Thinking about all my kids running around the neighborhood right now,
probably the streets different are a little older. So I've
got Jace who doesn't look across with Jolie, and so
I'm like, you can't just run brother across the street
like that, like without looking you like more of the
(06:38):
like Ramsey runs across the street to her, but like
around a cold a sax, don't worry about it. Yeah,
we're on the main like yeah, you are same, drive
like no, no, like a highway basic and they like
drive fast. And I'm like that parent that you're that one.
I'm the old lady in the neighborhood. That's like waving
my hand. Yeah. But it's like your kids live here.
(06:58):
We had so many kids that run around in here
that I just am like, you know, so I put
my little uh turtle, I love your turtle with the
flag in the middle of the street. You got one
to um. All I can think about right now is
I was not allowed to talk to boys on the phone.
It was fifth grade. I remember I was ten. Fifth grade.
(07:20):
A boy called this is back in the day when
like the answering machine. That was the worst. When you're
sitting for dinner and then all of a sudden, it's like, hey,
it's Sam just calling. And I'm like, Sam looked really
pretty today, choir, but go ahead, um. But Chris Blank
called me. I just remember, and I don't remember what
(07:44):
he wanted, but I remember my mom. Well, I went
to the other room to get it. I remember walking
in the hallway and her meeting me in the hallway.
I mean, like, why was he calling? And I made
up a lie like he needed something for school. Well,
she was listening the entire time on the other way
in Mine's not liar liar pants on fire? Yeah, Chris
(08:06):
l Guys, Maggie went out on Broadway the other day.
She did? She did you guys ready for a few
of that? I have not, so I only listened to
one of them. But are you ready? She's precious. Here
we go. I've got the videos too, And this is
gonna just be one second. I mean, this is I'm
gonna show this video. I mean she's she's a bridesmaid.
(08:26):
She's got some purple hair. Wait was she really a bridesmaid? Yeah?
I mean she's wearing the I feel like you can't
wear the t R if you're not a bridesmaid? What
I didn't if she was like posing maid? What do
you mean bridesmaid? Because this is the most okay, But
if you're in Nashville, this is a very undercover look.
If you didn't want to be noticed because a bridesmaid
(08:48):
except ath Carolina Eline, what is your biggest dick in
a relationship when they don't know how to clean up
after themselves in the dishwasher, put your close in the hammer, right,
it's not that difficult. I agree, don't you agree? I
do agree wholeheartedly. Payton. And my question is what is
(09:11):
a good agent? Get married? Oh? Pay good question? Pay In?
Do you know my gutens was it? Never? Never? Never? Run? Payton? No?
What is your I would say thirty two. That was
(09:33):
my first divorce. I mean I would say thirty two
or thirty five, Like I like thirty five, I feel
thirty five. I don't know, because there's things I liked
about being like well, having kids early, being married early,
but having kids early. Um, but i'd say, like twenty
eight to thirty. I still think I would have dined.
(09:55):
I want you to be like solidly in your thirties. Yeah,
I need a solid thirty two because yeah, the food.
But it also depends where you're at, right, So like
I wasn't fully there yet, but I don't think you
really get there till your thirties anyways. Maybe I don't know.
But then when you look a cat, well I was
like this at eighteen, so like you know, like old,
(10:16):
like acting grandma at the age of eighteen, but most
people are. I do think it just matters. I think
it matters what you know to be sure of about yourself. Yeah,
for sure. M like I I knew when I was
getting married the first time it was not the time
same and I look back and I'm like why, But
(10:38):
it was like such a smart choice, like to people's plans,
that was mine. Oh yep, staying on branded people. This
question is from from from from Broadway. Hi, I'm store
me up from South Carolina, and my question is way
(10:58):
in a relationship should you use are doing your partners laundry? Never? Ever?
Also never never, someone's gonna wrap that up never never
never a right three nevers And that was good from Broadway.
I like personally, like I have I done? No, I
haven't done Alan's laundry. H Allen strikes me as a
(11:18):
do it yourself first and he does his laundry, and
I think he's thrown mine in a few times. Oh
he did. He threw mine in and then he left
it kind of in a pile, the dry pile. And
I don't like the dry pile because then it's then
it's wrinkled. So I'm like in my mind, I'm like,
let's I didn't say anything because it's like great is
sweet thought at the same time, like I will just
rewash it. M go, don't touch my stuff. I shouldn't
(11:45):
be married. I don't. I'm probably just pregnant and tired.
But I really this person to his own laundry he
does now do it. I will I do all of
ours if his isn't there to do. But he's usually
in and out repacking so quick that he's like let
me to he just does allowed. I have a question though,
because you do the kids laundry? Do you do the
kids lundry? Yeah? Yeah, same obviously. Yeah, it'd be nice
(12:15):
if they would. I know you're still gonna say no
to this, but we have to do like double laundry,
so it would be nice if they picked up the
slack too. I'm about to cast my husband publicly go
work because he's like I caught us up on laundry
the other day and I was like, okay, dry pile,
heaping dry pile on top of like the laundry room counter,
(12:39):
and I was like, so that's not caught up. Caught
up to me is like those items are then in
their room and roy GBIV in the closet hanging that's
caught up. So those are done, but those are not folded,
and they're not put in a basket, and they're not
up to the next level. Mine get folded on the
kitchen table. Okay, Sota doesn't put him step put it away?
(13:00):
No no, no really. Now, if I'm like in the
middle of putting up a bunch of laundry and I say, hey,
can you help me take some of this up? Like
take he will. But in his defense, the girls are
pretty much the same size. They're literally like small medium,
you know whatever. It makes me more mad when he
puts it up, So I'm fine with that that I
would like it in the basket. But he can't even
separate the girls. He literally doesn't know who's who's and
(13:22):
the girls at all. Yeah, Like I find my t
shirts and loves pile and I'm just like, so that's
just gonna get frustrated. So I am thankful for the
folding though. That's nice. Yeah, the dry pile is like
all done. I was like, um, I go in and
Everest is like staring at me. Cool. Sometimes I'm guilty
of that with nixt laundry though, because I need to
move on from his and it's still in the dryer.
(13:42):
So sometimes i'll do the dry pile you dry pilot
sometimes only sometimes I appreciate No, it's not mean I
appreciate alan though. I'll sit down on the couch and
I'll start folding the kids clothes or my clothes or whatever,
and he immediately grabs something and I go no, no, no no, no, no,
no no no. He's like, let me help. He's like,
(14:02):
I'm just saying like no. And then now I don't
say no, I'm just like good, like sure, like if
that's so sweet. He doesn't have to I'm not asking
him to, but I just I appreciate the well. And
I think at the end of the day, like if
they're willing to help and they're trying to help, even
if they don't know the way, that we should appreciate that.
And I know it's not easy to do all the time,
especially for me. I think it's it's uh, I like,
(14:28):
and this is something I'll say too, where I like,
like he's seen in the mornings, that's the very first
thing I do as I empty the dishwasher, very first thing,
same human because I don't like a dish in my
saying right. And I know we talked about this before,
but um, so that's the very first thing that I do.
So that way the kids can then put their their
stuff in the in the dishwasher. Um. And you know,
(14:51):
one of the mornings I had was just like running
late or whatever. That was the first thing that he did.
So I was like he it's like he saw like
my routine and like I was just like oh. I
ended up being like thank you for that, like you
would you saw what I do and then you yeah,
I did it without even like asking her, because that's
the something I don't like when people ask questions. Just
just do it because when you ask, I'm like, no, no no,
(15:12):
I got it. Yeah, always I got it, and then
I'm tired. I got it. But what I mean to
say is when I say I got it, I mean
yes please. Yeah. When I say I got it'd be
like ike out yeah, yeah, yeah yeah. When I say
I got it, I got it, that's yeah. That's that's
where you have to ask for I'm trying to get
better by asking. I think we should get better at
(15:34):
saying yes please. Yeah. I'm trying really hard because you
almost can't get mad at the other person if they oh, yeah,
no they don't. And then but then you're frustrated because
it's like, but I really wanted you to do do. I'm
up in third times a charm and by the third baby,
I'm just gonna be like, yes, I'll take any help
you can give me. I thought you talking about my marriages.
Oh no, this is the final marriage? Oh amen, mine marriage?
(15:56):
Or do you have any y? No? It was like, no, honey,
I'm settled into mine. How has anyone had therapy with
Amy lately? You guys are so much to unpack. I
haven't even processed. Huh. Oh. I got in the car.
It was one of those where I just got in
(16:16):
the car, very grateful, heart very heavy, very grateful, very empowering,
very tiring. And I got in the car and I
didn't even want the air the sound of the fanom.
I just drove and drank water and was like, okay,
Like it's a lot my voyage of not trusting people
(16:36):
or men, right, right? Did you do MDR today? I
did a lot of big MDAR. If I could frame
it for you guys, I would frame it. Maybe by
next week I can frame it it was just a lot.
Well let's put a little pin pin in that one
because we can. Yeah, something came up. I had therapy
yesterday with Amy and I cried a lot. I cried,
(17:00):
but it was something where yeah, it was just hard.
So anything else, Nope, we'll pin it too. Let's pin it.
Let's pin it. It's a lot to digest, like that's
the hardest part and a lot of like big revelations.
But then also just like, holy cow, I'm writing a
note for for ourselves to unpin therapy talk. Yeah, therapy,
(17:26):
but we're gonna switch gears because we have Heidi Pratt
coming on and I know you were a big Hills watcher.
I was. I watched uh some of it. I was
a Laguna Hills. Yeah, you know, we have Jason Waller
coming on, like he's gonna be sitting on the couch
with us. It's not crushy how I feel. It's just
(17:47):
I get excited Jason. Yeah, definitely not crushy. No no, no,
you're married, right. But I mean also, even if I
never had a cry, I don't have a lot of
celebrity crush It's fun. Fact, do you have one? I
had Matthew McConaughey, who I did too the greatest, And
then I heard he was stinky stinky. I didn't believe whatever,
(18:08):
It's probably just a rumor, but I needed something to
break my healthy obsession, so that was fine. Can we
just say something about the natural deodor and thing for
a second. It doesn't work well, So I'm really stinky,
Like I'm a naturally stinky person. I still have like
PTSD from X because I was He'd like, I'm like,
I know, I just feel like I never like so
I'd always like I know, I'd literally never noticed it
all the time. Like he I don't know, maybe he
(18:29):
just like hated me so much, but like I like
even my sense disgusted him. But like, I mean that
was like to the point where like Alan's like you
always smell so good, and I'm in my mind, I'm like,
are you just saying that because I stink, Like because
I'm just so ingrained that, like I have a bad
odor or something. So I'm like constantly like putting on
deodor and like all the time. And um So, but
(18:51):
there was this girl that worked, do't I don't I
say this? She was um at the house helping and
she wore a natural doutor. And again, some natural deodorants
might work for some people, but a lot of times
if you have that stink, what I've noticed is you're
just gonna it's gonna come out like pregnant. I it's
(19:14):
work well, and so yeah, and so I smell and
I'm like, it's to the point where you can't even
You're like, like you can't breathe. And it's like and
I'm very like smelly sensitive. And Jason's the same thing.
He's like, mom, what stinks? And I'm like, But then
when the person link sits on my couch and puts
(19:35):
their arm like I'm the thing, and I was like
and I was done, and I had to I had
to let the person go because I stunk. I couldn't say, like,
can you put on deodorant? How do how do you
have that conversation. It's interesting to me when people can't
smell themselves. I smell myself when I'm stinky, and then
I usually I would say, oh, I'm probably stinky. I'm
so paranoid about it. I'm not even that stinky. Really,
(19:57):
I just do my thing, and you will not me
doing natural deodorant because I have just I tried every
single one of them. I did three years natural deodorant.
None of it works for me my body chemistry. Yeah,
well that just went. Whyever we even get to deodorant.
Matthew McConaughey was not stinky. I don't know that Pert
(20:20):
ever smelled him in real life. Given the opportunity, I
would have loved the opportunity at once upon a time.
But do you have a celebrity crush? I used to
owe him and he's talked about that. But I don't
have a whole lot either. Yeah, it takes a lot
for me. Yeah, well, anybody anyways, moving on, we're gonna
get heidion. She married her celebrity crush, she sure did,
(20:43):
and we're gonna talk all things. Well. Hello, hey girl,
Hey did you just get didn't work out? You're in
your cute little like matching yoga set. Thank you. I'm
(21:04):
trying to get it in, but it's hard with feeding
and running around with this baby. And how's the baby now?
He's four months? Are you sleeping? I'm more than with Gunner.
So if I get like two hours straight three, I'm good.
It's crazy how we get so sleep deprived that I
feel like once we can get like a good two
(21:24):
or three hour chunk, then we start to feel like
we could run for office. Like it's like I got it,
no big deal. Spencer's like, oh, I woke up once
last night. I'm like, who are you talking to? Hi?
What do you mean? That's when I say to my husband, respectfully,
stop talking. Stop talking, girl. Thank you so much for
coming on the podcast. So a funny story we like,
(21:46):
and you will not remember this, but we met. Oh god,
how many years ago is that? I mean god, I'm
sam almost forty. I was like maybe twenty four, Like
I mean a long, long, long, long time ago. We
were at some club on sunset. It was you and Spencer,
and then someone set me and Brody up on a
(22:08):
blind date. So we're at this dinner and it was
like the worst. You were so sweet, but it was
the worst blind date ever with me and Brody, Like
the absolute worst, and the worst thing about it was
Probably one of my most embarrassing moments was that night,
because I was like, just we were not vibing at all,
(22:29):
and I'm like, he said he said something to me.
I was like, that's it, I'm leaving. But there were
mirrors on the walls. Okay, so I kind of get
up in what we had already finished our dinner, right
and like you guys were like somewhere or whatever. We
were sitting out like in a booth area or whatever,
and he had said something to me, and I was
like whatever, Like I'm out of here. So I go
(22:51):
marching towards the exit sign. Well, little do I know,
the exit sign walks me right in. It's the reflection.
It was all a mirror, and so I slam I
walk right into like a mirror. It's horrible. Was that
(23:13):
it was the one lacross from like the Shell station
on like Laurel Canyon, was the one right on the
right set. So when you'd come, if you're coming away
from the valley, knows the other one like the other
privilege privilege, yeah or whatever, Like it was like that was,
oh my gosh, it was so embarrassing. And that's the
last I saw of you or not did you just
(23:34):
turn around and walk the other way. I did not
look back to see if someone saw me. Oh, but
I'm pretty sure someone saw me walk right into that mirror.
I felt like I was in a funny house, Like
I was thinking that a fun house. Fun house, yeah,
funny whatever, fun Okay, But the transition to two have
you found it to be difficult or where are you at?
(23:56):
Because I struggled with the transition to two And how
old is Gunner? Let's start there, Okay, So Gunner is five,
which I was at first really concerned that he got
to be too far of an age difference because my
sister and I are three years and I wanted them
to kind of kind of like grow up closer and
to have each other in the house longer. But five
(24:17):
years has been great. I can't imagine having him younger
because Gunner is a lot, but you know, like he
wants so much of our attention and we've given it
to him so much for five years, and writer he's
fitting right in. So I think when he gets a
little older and there's more of a schedule, it will
be great. But this newborn stage has been a little challenging,
and Spencer's really stepped out and been so great at
(24:39):
doing a lot with Gunner. But I feel guilty that
I'm not there as much with him, because like I'm
the one who woke up with him all the time,
and I'm the one who would make sure to put
him to bed last. And you know, I just had
so much in my life revolving around Gunner. So Gunner's
done a really good job transitioning. But I feel like
for me, it's just it is hard being fouled in
the two directions. But I love it too, It's sure,
(25:01):
it's I love chaos and challenges obviously, Well girl, I
mean you've lived You've lived a lot of that very publicly, right,
so I feel like you're probably an expert on it.
And I'm curious, like with all the you know, new
streaming platforms and you know, the people doing the podcast
and talking about the hills, and it is it hard
(25:22):
for you to have to kind of hear or relive
things or you kind of like whatever, that's the past
and this is who I am today, and like, I'm
not going to let that affect where I've gone. I
think it's both because obviously, when you're doing like a
recap of a show, you're kind of having to like
go back and live things and moments that you wouldn't.
(25:43):
But in my everyday life it doesn't affect me because
I have the friends that I have, I have my marriage.
I mean, we've been together for sixteen years. You know,
we have two kids. I have a great family, so
my everyday life, it doesn't affect me. But then when
sometimes people bring it up where you have to talk
about certain things, obviously God brings it up. Are you pregnant?
(26:04):
I am so pregnant. I feel so extra pregnant in
this moment. Actually, I feel stuck in my body. Is
it obvious that I'm stuck in my body hiding because
I I wouldn't even know unless you were rocking and
holding your stomach, because from here pregnant at all. But
then I'm seeing the rocking and well, the baby is
like really in this moving stage that I just feel
(26:25):
like one of us is dedicated to you and the
other one of us is having a full blown party
in my abdomen. So I'm trying so hard congraduations. We're
not finding out it's our third So this has been
really fun, but I'm it's interesting because I have a
four year old boy. Janna and I our girls are
three weeks apart and our boys are three months apart,
(26:47):
so we live very similar life. So I need her
to catch up with me and get on the third quickly.
So we're not so distant, but my son will be
almost five. So it's interesting to hear you talk about
Gunner like, you know, because they are like the little
loves of our lives. My daughter is older and I'm
obsessed with my son, and I just can't imagine having
another boyfriend. So that's got to open your heart in
(27:07):
a different way. It's so true. This morning, Spencer said something.
He was like, you're not stressing me out or whatever,
because he just got his blood taken and he's like
too stressed out. And I was like, you know, that's
an internal conversation. I don't mean you like saying that
I am stressing you out and that you're not stressed
out and anyway, right or Gunner goes up and punches
Spencer and it's like, don't talk to my mom like that.
(27:30):
That's right, and in my mind and I try to
be like, I don't think you just stick up for me,
but thank you. And I was like this form, I'm
not saying anything, Just get in the car, thank you.
I love you. Come that's right. I'll be his client.
That's fine. I love it with you, with you and Spencer,
you know, being married for sixteen years, so wait, that
together for how long? Then together for sixteen, married for fourteen,
(27:52):
Mary Fortune, sixteen fortune. Okay, but I feel like when
you guys got married, there was so much like, oh,
this isn't gonna last. So now that you hit like
your fourteen are you kind of like middle finger to people?
I always felt that way. So I always felt like
I had nothing to prove with Spencer, and I just,
you know, I understand why people have thought that way
(28:13):
because on camera, and we were paid to have like
a very tumultuous relationship on camera, and so I see
why people thought that. But our real life was just
so different. So I knew our real relationship that we had,
like I would never have put up with any of that.
I would never have been in a relationship or like
my fiance is flirting with a girl in the club,
(28:33):
you know, like I have a zero tolerance policy. So
in real life it was just completely different. So it's
almost like we went on camera, you know, which obviously
you're an actress and you guys know, you know, it's
it's kind of acting, but then it bleeds into your
real life with people thinking that, and then you're really
kind of like that, well too far, You know. So anyways,
(28:57):
it was a balance. But my real life, I always
how we were and how I felt, and I just
knew it was a one time soulmate marriage that we
would you know, we'd have forever. So I just always
felt that way. But what area do you guys struggle
in the most? Like when you're like, oh, we keep
coming back to this one issue. Parenting is definitely tricky,
(29:21):
you know. It just takes your relationship to a whole
new level. So it's like, well, not only do I
need to confront you about this, I have to advocate
for this little child, you know. And you both want
the right thing, and you both have different ways of
doing things. You know. I'm from a small town in
Colorado with my mom who is like very strict, zero policy,
you know, and Spencer wants to be fun dad. And
(29:43):
then when you're fun dad, the child doesn't give you
the same amount of respect that they're getting long because
I am not going to take things, you know. So
he's like he only listens to you, and I'm like, well,
maybe you should not be so fun. And also parent
is the most challenging. But I had to have a
conversation when we first became parents, and it becomes more
(30:07):
relevant every year, is that we're the team. We have
some kind of division, we need to talk about it
later or something like that, but for the benefit of
our child too, like we need to stand together. And
he's really come around to that. That's great. Spencer is
fun dad. Fun dad is really into hummingbirds. Can we
talk about it at all? Are we just not gonna
(30:28):
do that? I mean, I'm fascinated watching these videos, Like no,
it's crazy, like what is he doing? He's like a whisperer.
What is he even doing? Heidi? You know, it was
actually it's like a divine intervention because when I found
out that I was pregnant, we had one hummingbird at
our old house. We found this hummingbird nest and it
was so symbolic, like, oh, we're having a baby and
(30:49):
we just found this nest. And then one got eaten
and one lived and we had to rescue the hummingbird
and it was this whole thing. And then we moved
here and there were a lot of hummingbirds at this house,
and so Spencer already knew so much about them, and
he makes hummingbird nectar every day, which is sugar water
because the red dyet is poisonous for them actually like
(31:09):
kills them. So he makes it fresh every day and
then they just come and then he goes out there
with his feeders and they love it. And now Gunner's
in on it. It's like a whole operation. White you're
up too, I know, it's like a whole thing. And
you never and they get in the house and then
you have to like capture the hummingbird, but the right way,
and it's like, it's just it's the way I don't
know about them in the house. It's interesting because I
(31:31):
was a hills watcher, so Spencer was always the villain. Yeah,
And I'm like, oh, well, you just can't they get
they all have to shut up now because I always
the hummingbird whisper. It's like you, I mean, what is
more opposite day than the villain the guy that's literally
holding hummingbird babies in his hand like he obviously has
good energy. The hummingbirds are Yeah, so we shut that down.
(31:52):
I love it. Do you do you even like talking
about the hills um Yes and no. I think that
love the ad by the way. I appreciate the and
I've got an ant I have an ampersand on it
because I always think that it's not a butt, it's
always an ant and I love you, love your ants
totally thank you for the acknowledgment. I strategically also use
(32:13):
the ants. Yeah, it's a twofold. It's tricky because people
are so team Lauren and they're kind of brainwashed to like,
no matter what she did, there was never a problem,
and I was the bad guy and that's how it was.
So it's really ingrained in a lot of people's mind.
But then interestingly enough, with TikTok and all this new generation,
(32:35):
a lot of people watch it with a different perspective
and they're like, whoa, who is this Lauren girl? And
you know, it's definitely changed it. And then also it's
hard with Spencer because I understand why people get worked
up or think the way that they did because it
was such a fake relationship. I mean, like some things
in the beginning were real, like you know, real relationships
have rockyness. Thank god they didn't show me being like
(32:57):
a player also because as I totally was, And it
just gets tricky. But at the same time, I'm so
thankful over the Hills and it was such a blessing,
and I met the love of my life. And I'll
always have a place in my heart for Lauren, and
I appreciate the friendship we did have and what she
did do for me and letting me be on our show.
(33:19):
So it was such a fun moment in time, and
also it was very challenging. Sure, if there's I mean,
you know, obviously it's not good to have regrets, right,
but if there's, is there a moment that you can
go back to and go, I really wish I would
have done this differently, or I wouldn't have done or
you know, not do this. I wish I never brought
(33:41):
my family on the hills. We should have had a
no family policy. I didn't see that happening the way
it did. It just caused a lot of miscommunication between
like my mom and I and my sister and I
because the producers would tell you one thing and then
you'd all kind of go in with the plan. I'm like, Okay, yeah,
you can say this, and you know, because in real life,
my mom loves Spencer and there was never a problem.
(34:02):
But then when we started like acting out that she
didn't like him, then it was kind of like, wait
a minute, Mom, why did you say that? And she's like,
I don't said to say something, and then it caused
it's actual turmoil when there was no problem, and then
it just led to a lot of unnecessary, real hurts.
So I think that if I could do one thing,
it would have just been not including It was tricky though,
(34:24):
because the producers were like, well, you guys don't have
a storyline and you're not going to get paid, and
you're not going to be on the show because no
one will film with you because Laurence told all the
casts not to film with you guys anymore. So you've
got to bring your mom on and or find something.
So I was just put in a hard position, especially
at twenty and not having a good not having an
Asian manager, lawyer, not anyone. I mean, Spencer was my soundboard.
(34:48):
I'm like, okay, what are we complaying? You know, So
it was hard not having a team or anyone to
help guide us through that time. Right as you were
saying that, I question him. To my mind, I'm like,
do I ask it? Because if someone asked me the question,
I would have a hard time. I don't know if
i'd answer it. As well, from being on a show, right,
(35:12):
So it's like I think back to, like, you know,
one of my shows that I was on, if there
was a person from that show that you'd be fine
with never talking to ever again, Like the one person
that you were like would would never want to talk
to again and be like totally fine with it, Like
if there was one that you could say, I mean,
I'm fine with never talking to a few people. One
(35:38):
is there a narrowing people out? I know that's the thing.
I was like, what I even narrow that because it's
like I know mine, like you know, and so it's
like it's interesting because it's like it's not it's not
even like a mean girl thing. It's just like I
choose to not let that kind of come into my
life again and cause or me to feel X Y
and Z and you were both like twenty doing the shows,
(35:59):
like it's a different lifetime. Who's yours. We'll see. I've
got a few I like, I know I do I
have I do have one from from from One Tree Hill,
But I should answer it, yeah, answer I know. I
never if she did, I would, oh, she's going to show.
(36:23):
I'd be fine never ever talking to um A few
people on that show. So Lauren, I'm fine with never
talking to Lauren again. We have gone our separate ways.
Our lives are completely different. Um, so much has happened.
I'm fine with never talking to her again. I'm fine
with not talking to her little minions again, like, um,
you know right, been there, So I'm fine with that.
(36:48):
I'm fine with you know, I love Kristen Cavalary, so
thankfully I do talk to her. Um. Yeah, and the reboot,
I'd be fine not talking to like Ni Like most
the cast, I sortly fine. I'm gonna take us to
(37:16):
a healthier place. Okay, all right. I tried giving her
and I tried to rescue this night. Is there anyone
that you knew super super well during filming that you
are like most proud of the person they are today? Good?
Good question. Um. I love Jen Bunny. She and I
(37:37):
have been my best friends since I was nineteen. We
had a very similar thing like falling out with Lauren,
and Lauren you know, kind of cut her off and gave,
you know, treated her in a really unfair way, especially
being best friends since they were in like preschool. Um,
and she has become like a doctor and an incredible mom.
(37:58):
I mean, she has all these accolades and I actually
she has like a book coming out. So she's one
of my closest friends. And I was so proud of
her for the life that she did. She went to USC,
She's incredibly smart, she's so sweet, she's a great wife,
great mom. So I'm very proud of her. I like that.
It's interesting to me to have you frame it. I
(38:20):
don't want to pot start here, but this is something
I've never quite heard it put this way that it
was Lauren's show. Oh yeah, well wasn't it. Well never
I would just see like some well it was obviously
a main character. I don't know that like the viewers
really saw it. No, we didn't see it. Like to me,
you were just as much a main character as Lauren
(38:41):
was as Audrina, Like you know what I mean, Like
there was some of it was more dominantly obviously spaced
towards her and times, but like, I remember you just
as much as I remember her. But I'm going to
back it up though, for you sex in the City
who shows it. Wow, that's hard for me because we
all know how Bradshaw I am. So I'm saying, so
it's like she's like the Bradshaw of the Hills because
(39:02):
I look at it and go, wait a minute, No,
I didn't watch the show religiously. I saw some episodes,
and I would say that she was the main character. Interesting. Yeah,
so she was the narrator. It was her spin off
I'm gonna be all about Lauren, and that was part
of that's true. I guess that was part of the
problem when we all had to start having more storylines, like,
it wasn't supposed to be that way. It wasn't supposed
(39:24):
to be like half the show about Spencer and I
half the show about Lauren. And that became a problem
for her and her team too. They're like, this is
Lauren's show. And at a point MTV was like, well,
you know, because Lauren's like, I'm going to quit the show,
um if Heidie and Spencer are on it. And I
think that was season three and so MTV told her
to walk and they're like, well, a show without Heidie
(39:45):
and Spencer anymore. And that became a really big division
in within the show. Well, that's jealousy anytime you're done
with ego. That's I mean, that's because she wasn't bringing
enough of the what drama or whatever it was. I mean,
that's her own, Like I would say, we all remember
the mascara dripping moment. I well remember, And that was
(40:07):
what was so unfortunate, is like I'm such a team
player and I'm such a best friend rider die that
I just want like the best for everyone, you know,
And I don't know. I wasn't in her position, and
it wasn't my show and I wasn't the narrator. But
I'm just not really like that. So when she was
like you need to stop dating Spencer and like all
these hard things that started happening, I was like, wait
a minute. You had a boyfriend that I didn't like
(40:28):
that I had to live with for a year, and
I would never have said to you like stop dating him,
or we're not going to be friends or I don't
want to hear about him. I'm like, that's the time
you need me the most as a friend. That's when
I need to step up. That's when you need your girl,
That's when you need a shoulder to cry on at
any time. Like I'm here for you whenever. However much
time you want to spend with him, that's great, And
(40:48):
I would stay at the apartment like half the time
and really strategically make sure to have time with her
because she did just go through a huge breakup a
few months before, and you know, she was going through
a hard time or you know, had just had gone
through a hard time. So I spent like half my
first Valentin's Dave with Spencer with Lauren, and she was
(41:08):
still mad at me, and I was like, this is
getting out of control, Like I'm sorry, There's not much
more I can do at this point, and she just
it was really unfortunate, and I was like, I didn't
even think you were like this, and you know, that's
that was the real division in our friendship, and so
on cameras she started like kind of doing things and
(41:30):
saying things and I had no idea. She was saying
to MTV like I don't want hide on the show
anymore and stuff like that. So it was unfortunate, the
whole fallout of our friendship. And I know we were
young and things like that, but it just I would
never have been a friend like that to her. Sure,
that's tough. That's I'm curious. Like with forgiveness too. We
were talking about this one of our episodes, like where
(41:52):
what's your stance on it, Like do you think is
it forgetting? Like do you forgive or like what? Yeah? Yeah,
And I think forgiveness is more for yourself, you know,
Like I have love for Laura, and I really do.
I appreciate all the time that we had. And you know,
there's other people in my life too that I've hurt
me as much or more than her. And it's all
(42:13):
about moving forward in life because forgiveness only makes you
feel bad. I'm sure that person doesn't even care anymore,
you know. So I think forgiveness is super important for yourself.
And you know, obviously I mean not obviously, but I
also I am a Christian. I'm pretty spiritual, and I
think that it's just a good thing to do, and
I want to teach my kids to be that way
(42:34):
and I want to model that myself. And sometimes forgiveness
is constant. It's not like a one time, Oh I
forgive you and now everything's fine. Like sometimes you get
those feelings again and you get angry and you have
to pray about it or talk about it or what
meditate however people do, and it's like, Okay, actually I
wish that person the best. I'm going to let that go.
Maybe they're hurt, there's other things going on. So I
(42:57):
think forgiveness is one of the most important parts of life,
and it helps you to move forward in other relationships
and it helps just it only helps what also factories,
you know, boundaries are also really good. So with forgiveness
does come boundaries, right, We're a big fan of boundaries
in the share what do you do when you get stuck?
Like how does Heidi? How does Heidie get out of
a rut? When you know you're down about something or
(43:19):
motherhood or things didn't even get that you know, show
you on it, or like what do you what do
you do to go okay? Like I'm gonna be okay.
I'm very big into prayer, so even if it's like
two minutes, so I'll just go pray about it. I
think crying is great, I think so baptisting to cry
and let it out, but just to take those that time,
(43:41):
even with the kids, Like if I'm getting frustrated or
i feel like, you know, if Gunner's having a tantrum
and Rikers crying and Spencer saying something, I'm just like
need to take a deep breath, let this out of
my body, Like when you start feeling it, it's just
time to kind of a little so care. So I
think quick self care is an important thing because sometimes
(44:03):
you don't have ten minutes to yourself. You know, it's like, okay,
you just need thirty seconds to breathe. What is your
top self care at this point? Like I know your postpartum,
You're you've got five year old Gunner, You've got Spencer,
who is a character in himself, Like, you've got a lot,
You're living in a frat house essentially, So tell me,
(44:26):
tell me if you get like five to ten minutes,
we're praying, like is it running? Is it? Like? What
is what is it for you? Right now? That just
feels like okay. Back to Heidi. My favorite thing to
do is be a nature So for me, it's like
taking the dogs on a walk is the best because
we live right by a trail and I can just
like be up in the mountains quickly, So that is
(44:49):
really important for me. I try to do that every day. Also,
I can take Gunner up there and then he's like
playing with sticks and trees, and then I can also
just like look at the clouds and relax and right
you're sleeping on me, so that's important for me. It's
just being outside even for a little bit, and then
I only get a short amount of prayer time, so
(45:10):
I just try to do that even for like two
minutes a day. But like you're saying right now, self cares,
it's a little tricky. I'm trying to work out again, too,
So three days a week, I'm trying to work out
with a trainer and have that time, and I have
a babysitter come because I don't want to rely on
Spencer being able to deal with the baby crying because
(45:30):
he like freaks out. So I'm like, all right, I
don't need to deal with you and a baby crying
and trying to work out, So self care sometimes it's
just having someone come hold the baby. That preventative. It's
preventative resentment disorder, is what I'm trying to. Like, I
hire the help so I don't have to depend on you,
so I can keep liking you and I can still
work out. Okay, right, I'm with you. I can't remember
(45:54):
if I said this on the show or I know
I said it in therapy, but I've been struggling lately
with prayer because I've been kind of, you know, frustrated
with certain things like work wise, and so someone I
think it was my therapist, she was like, you know,
just asked like she's like, be really direct with your
prayer with God. And so I I went up to
my new house that's being built and I was standing
(46:15):
there and you know, I started to pray. But then
when I when I was praying, I was like, hey, God,
like you know God, like I really like I would
love this. But then I start I switched and I
told my therapist. I was like, I stopped praying because
but then I was like because I said, but I'm
so grateful for my kids, and it's like I'm so
grateful for this, And so then I felt bad asking
for something because I've already been blessed with so much.
So I'm like, how ungrateful am I? Then I'm asking
(46:36):
for something even more when you've blessed me with this.
So then I just spent like fifteen minutes like fighting
myself and then be like all right, well whatever, like
just do you just do you when you want to
do you? And then like I was like it's gonna
be on your time anyways, Okay, cool, Bye, like, but
thanks for everything, like did you even talk to me?
Because it feels like you had a one side of conversation.
But I like was really battling with like asking for
(46:56):
like you know, asking God for it, but then also
like being like, but thank you so much for everything
you've given me. So then I felt bad asking for more,
like you how greedy of you? But then my therapist goes, well,
why do you feel like you don't deserve more? And
then I started like crying. That was like my you know,
my whole belief, like well I don't I don't deserve
the happy ending. I don't get the happy ending, like
(47:17):
that just doesn't happen, like something will fall through, something
will like not work like. And then she's like, but
what if you can you can be grateful and also
ask for more too, and so I yeah, and and
but I would really like have found myself struggling with that,
like with prayer. You know, sometimes I have been there myself,
and also God has like convicted my heart sometimes to
(47:39):
not ask for things, like I've gone to prayer and
I'm like, all right, I need to ask for this.
And then sometimes like when I have felt it as
you're saying it's felt not right, Like, wait a minute,
maybe I just need to pause and be in a
season or just have a few days of gratitude and
then come back to it. So I've also done that.
I'm like, okay, Actually, God just convicted me in January.
(48:00):
He was like, just do a month of gratitude prayers.
Because I always ask, I'm a big asker. I'm like,
all right, Lord, oh maybe we're not lottery. Does I
want it? And I'll do good things? You know? You know,
so I'm like my mom nade the new house, come
on talking. So I can't handle you. But sometimes also
(48:24):
God has convicted me, like why don't you just take
a few days or even like this moment and just
relax and just grateful Because what God can work on
in your heart with just gratitude sometimes leads you to
a different ask. Right, So maybe whatever you're asking needs
to be tweaked a little bit and by going back
(48:45):
to gratitude and just praising and like I'll be like,
thank you for my toes, thank you for the air
and the oxygen. Thank you we're not having a new
heal or war right now, you know, thank you. My
kids have food, so sometimes it is those bags six
that God just works on your heart in mysterious ways, Right,
That's what's so cool about God, Like we don't know
(49:05):
why he does things or what we're supposed to pray for.
But sometimes it's just also an inner peace, Like maybe
you're not having peace while you're asking for something and
He just needs like to It's like an adjustment with
a chiropractor. Maybe just needs to crack this little thing
and then have you come an hour later. Maybe it's
a few days later. I don't know, but I think
(49:27):
that's interesting. Like when you're starting to feel conflicted with prayer,
I think that's because that's God. Sometimes it's just like
be still, like I am God, I got this, I
know what you want. I have something better coming for you.
So maybe I don't know, but it is always interesting
to me. I love that, and thank you for speaking
on it too. I love we Actually the guest before
(49:49):
you on another episode we just talked about her faith,
and it's just I love that people are talking about it.
So I like conversational prayer too. That's something like I
think we miss. I think we've think it has to
be so officially started, so officially ending and so like
I'll just be in my kitchen and I'm just like
I feel sad, and I don't even necessarily ask for anything.
I'm just like I want to tell you because I
(50:10):
know you know, but also just because I want you
to like do whatever, like so it's just like kind
of conversational. I'm not it's like all day. I actually
learned that when I was going through my divorce because
I felt like lonely and I was like I kind
of want to date God, which sounds weird, but then
I would just be like, all right, what do I
want to have for like, you know, just like kind
of conversational and it feels a little less official, and
then you don't feel like you have to request anything
(50:32):
or maybe pinpoint of feeling and you can just say
like this is it, like the beautiful surrender over and
over again. I'm totally with you on that, Like Jesus
is my best friend. That's how I feel, you know.
And it says like like you're saying, I always am
like the love of my life, You're the lover of
my soul because nobody knows me deeper and more real
(50:54):
and less judgmental, Like that's the thing I don't with
Christianity or any spirituality. People are like so critical of it.
It's like you're missing the whole point. It's not to
be judgmental and critical like you're missing it, Like what
on one, maybe go work on yourself there, but like
maybe start a genesis. I don't know. Jecking got me
okay on a major projections. I got something going on
(51:17):
with God. Okay, we got our own deal here. But
I'm with that all day. I'm just like, all right, God,
help me find a parking spot, like I have this
praper park. I'm like, however, I'm going through it like
it doesn't happen Diesel official. It's more like a relationship.
It's just like your friend hanging out with you. You know.
I love it. Well, Heidi, thank you so much for
coming on. I adore you. So. I'm glad we've met
(51:39):
now in this stage of our lives and not me
running into mirrors, mirror, not baby bird Janna hitting the mirror.
I cannot wait to bring this up to Brodie too.
I'm gonna go yeah, buddy, yeah, and we're all in
better places for what was so nice. Thank you guys
(52:03):
for having me on and anytime you want mom talk anything,
I'm fully here so I love it precious, all right,
Thanks girl, appreciate you. Bye okay by girl hie girl
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