November 17, 2025 • 47 mins
Have you adjusted to Daylight Savings Time?? Jana, Kathryn and Kirsten are feeling it hard, but there’s a lot to Whine about!
The ladies get real about the body image issues they dealt with growing up, and how they can break the cycle for their own daughters.
We get into some Selling Sunset drama and is it ever okay to blast your friend’s partner on social media??
Plus, how do you handle a husband who asks for oral sex… every day??
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Wind Down with Janet Kramer an I'm Heeart Radio podcast.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
Hi guys, Hi, Oh are you doing? Oh? Just over
your conteplain? How much to share? As usual normal wind
down podcast day.
Speaker 3 (00:17):
Isn't that how everyone starts? Like you have all these
things in your head and you're.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
Like, do I talk about this? Do I not? You know? Yeah?
I got a question answer any update from your friend? None?
Oh that's okay. The friends still follow yeah, oh just
checking in. There's time. Well, it's always when it's this
social clip that I'm like, oh, we want to get
(00:42):
somewhere with this one.
Speaker 3 (00:44):
It gives that I'm not gonna lie every time the
tag comes through, I'm like, oh, same, Like, hold your breath,
what's the social clip going to be?
Speaker 2 (00:53):
Well? This is interesting, lovely segue, Oh boy, Because sometimes
you don't have to have the clip absolutely to cause drama. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (01:02):
I mean, I can't tell you how many times I
go to Hannah and go, this is not going on socials.
Speaker 2 (01:07):
She's like ah, and then here we are, and how
many requests for a show talking about said potential drama. Yeah,
that was not a clip that I'm like, let's talk
about it.
Speaker 3 (01:19):
Nick the other day was like are you just gonna
stop talking about these things because things keep happening? And
I'm like, you know, I don't think I am. I
just you know, it is what it is, even when
it go ahead. No please, sorry, I was gonna say
even when it comes to haunt you two three months later,
like you just listen.
Speaker 2 (01:37):
I here's a positive of it talking about it. Guess
who booked a three and a half week stay in
Tennessee Nana and Papa.
Speaker 1 (01:48):
Oh well then well that might be a little there
you go, you know, I think now, yeah, they booked
an airbnb to come to come hang and be with
the game.
Speaker 3 (02:00):
Really been listening every day, they know, they know the battery.
Speaker 2 (02:07):
Well what else can we work up in this little laboratory?
Let's stay though, So that's what we're different. I would
have never know, well, I mean three weeks and I
would do. I would do like a week and a half. Hey,
fun fact. Yeah yeah. Preston's mom has come for two
different two weeks since before and stayed with me for
(02:27):
two weeks and I absolutely adore having her. Right, So
I just want to I just want to throw that
well because I feel like my reputations, well, I just
feel like, my reputation on here is pretty bitchy. Like
it's like it kind of sucks because I feel like
now I'm always trying to defend myself because people always
like he doesn't want people in her house. I also
(02:47):
just came off of a little two night hosting of
my Eastern Michigan girlfriends that came into town, and I
piled in six people into my home and loved them
and loved them well and it was fun. So I
am actually nice.
Speaker 3 (03:00):
I don't think that you have you're the one with
like the reputation of being bitchy.
Speaker 2 (03:05):
You don't think people think I don't like they're always like, well,
we know, Chris, I'm not gonna have anybody over. It's like,
come on now, it's like you're one thing.
Speaker 4 (03:11):
It's like, you won't let people come over.
Speaker 2 (03:13):
But I do. Even you think I won't let people
come over.
Speaker 4 (03:17):
I have them to your house, yes, but you've never
been to my house. I don't have people over.
Speaker 2 (03:20):
So maybe that's the one that does like people over.
Speaker 4 (03:22):
Oh everyone knows I'm the bitch.
Speaker 3 (03:26):
Really, people really appreciate it, though, No, I don't know.
I would think from the outside looking in. Of all
three of us. I'm the bitch of the podcast.
Speaker 2 (03:35):
I don't think that at all. I think you can
I vote myself to bitch. No it's me. No, I
don't think so. I actually thoroughly enjoy it. I've told
you that below. And if it is, I'm telling you
I'm not going to look at the poll. How do
(03:56):
you not look? I don't look a lot. Pull even
get in the comments. When I said I hated football,
I was like, I'm not going in these comments. Come
to get real love.
Speaker 3 (04:04):
You really should have then gotten to my TikTok comments
about me and the.
Speaker 2 (04:09):
Same oh boy, and well it's resurrected.
Speaker 3 (04:13):
It's a fun day. And not even mind that when
being on social it's just when I talk about.
Speaker 2 (04:16):
People like family. So here's here's the thing. So I
think there are aspects. And again I've said many times
on here it'd be nice if Bananas and Papas were
able to spend more time or go to games and stuff.
And maybe I'm not saying the podcast was the reason
that they have booked, but I think it is maybe
(04:37):
recognizing like okay, maybe I don't know. I'm making this
back completely, not the Airbnb part, but you know, in
my mind, it's something that they're maybe recognizing too, to
spend to spend more time while the kids are at
such a beautiful age to that want them around, right. Yeah,
and so with your situation though when they're not clips. Yeah,
(04:58):
and there's a you know. But here's here's what I
love about it. So we are you spoke about? We
are in it today?
Speaker 1 (05:18):
Girls.
Speaker 2 (05:19):
I just you spoke about your mom listening, and she
texted a beautiful text being like I did care and
can we have a conversation. You've said you were waiting
on a text message to send. Have you sent said
text message? Yes?
Speaker 4 (05:32):
I sent a text message, And.
Speaker 5 (05:33):
Basically she's so sweet at the game, She's like, I
just like, I almost wanted to be like, thanks for listening.
Speaker 2 (05:39):
I love you, and I did. I was really close
to you, but I didn't also want her to feel
because it would have been She's so great. I love her,
I love your mom, I love your dad, I love
I've never met these people, but I'm just saying it's.
Speaker 5 (05:54):
I think it's beautiful how she responded to this. Yes, yes,
But what is interesting though, is it it is walking
a tight line, a tightrope. Oh yeah, with concause we
want to share our truth. Unfortunately, our truth does involve
people in the story.
Speaker 4 (06:14):
Yeah, it just gets so tricky.
Speaker 5 (06:16):
It does, because you want to share, yes, and then
it's it's and again it's that line of most likely
someone's going to be a part of that story with you.
Speaker 3 (06:27):
Yeah, I mean it can't just be us, No, I
mean it can, but very rarely it does involve other
I mean it usually involves other people.
Speaker 5 (06:34):
I know, which is funny though, because I've I've had
actually someone reach out to me and say, you know,
you've spoken about people on your podcast, and you know,
I really want to share something about my ex because
I know these things and it's so frustrating. You know,
she's listening all these things. And I said to her,
I said, what is your reasoning for wanting to speak
(06:57):
out about it?
Speaker 2 (06:58):
Is it to hurt him?
Speaker 5 (06:59):
Is it to to bash him publicly? I said, If
those are your reasons, then don't do it. Yes, it
is frustrating that they are doing X, Y and Z,
and they are doing this. I said, but if it's
to help other people then and to help you through
sharing your story, then to help other people, then yes,
I think it's okay. But if it's just to go
(07:20):
after someone on a public platform, that's not okay, right.
But I don't think we've ever sat here, and I mean, yes,
I've obviously talked about X's on here and there are
things I could say, right, but also to protect my kids,
and also, it's not what they do now in their
free time is not my business, right, right, right, or
(07:43):
what I know now about certain things, It's not my
job to come on here and expose what they're doing
behind closed doors. Now, if it affects my kids, I'll
handle it privately or if it'll you know what I'm saying.
But when it comes to things that I've gone through
in ex relationships, it's more just how I felt in
the situation, and they're they're the bystander of that. They're
(08:07):
the people that came that either hurt or how I
grew and healed with it.
Speaker 2 (08:12):
I think it's it's not.
Speaker 5 (08:15):
It's never our intention to hurt people that we might
talk about that might be family or an X.
Speaker 2 (08:21):
Right, It's just it is our truth of that story.
Speaker 3 (08:24):
Right, And I think it's important to see the intentionality
behind it. But I think that maybe sometimes that's probably
hard because if it's me and I'm listening to someone
talk about me on a podcast. I can understand where
that may be hard to see the intentionality behind it. Sure,
i'd be like, hey, why are you talking about me
on this podcast? But generally there's a reason why we
talk about things. You know, we like to talk things
(08:46):
out on here.
Speaker 2 (08:46):
We do.
Speaker 3 (08:47):
We like people's we like our opinions, you know, like
we don't really get to talk except for this time
during the week.
Speaker 2 (08:53):
It is very true.
Speaker 5 (08:54):
And also I always think the underlying truth of it
is that if it could help someone else feel none alone,
then I'm going to share it. Yeah, And that's always
my intention. I have not done that perfectly, but that
is where I try now to share from.
Speaker 3 (09:11):
Yeah, and I think it's always been your intention. I
just think sometimes it can come off. You know, we've
all had instances where it's come off like, man, was
where was the intention behind that?
Speaker 2 (09:20):
Right? It sounds like we were just bashing, right X y.
Speaker 4 (09:23):
Z because sometimes we can go, we can just get
go and.
Speaker 2 (09:26):
We just keep going and its recording.
Speaker 5 (09:30):
But you know what's so interesting though, is speaking of
the friend that AB had that you asked about, I
had another friend a good friend.
Speaker 2 (09:38):
Again, we don't. We're not as close and I'm not
even going to give her a shout out here. Shane Grimes.
Speaker 5 (09:43):
She sent me the longest voice memo just being like,
I am so sorry.
Speaker 2 (09:49):
She's like, she's like, if this is about me? Because
she's like, I totally forgot to respond. She's like, because
I invited her to the premiere.
Speaker 5 (09:57):
I invited her and she said I'm not sure, and
I was like, no worries, girl, just let me know
closer time.
Speaker 2 (10:01):
Well, she didn't listen. I get it. We're busy. It's funny,
you know what I mean.
Speaker 5 (10:05):
But she's like, if this She's like, I'm spiraling. She's like,
if this is about me, I'm so sorry I didn't.
I like, I know that I didn't confirm one hundred
percent because this other person confirmed a hundred percent saying yes,
and then dis didn't show for sure. It's different and
and I mean I didn't even listen to all. I
just read the transcript of it because it was long.
She's like, oh my gosh, this isn't about me. That
I feel even stupider, and she's like, I love you,
(10:27):
and I just she's like, and I hate that we
haven't hung out recently and blah blah, blah, blah blah.
And I just responded back. I'm like, girl, I love
you so much that you even you know, thought to
think that it was you. But also the fact that
the matter is that you reached out you didn't have to.
Speaker 2 (10:45):
Yeah, that was it wasn't about you. I love you,
I would have loved for you. But I also know
you're busy and it's all good, Like it's genuinely all good.
Speaker 3 (10:52):
Yeah, speaking of that, that is so funny. I had
a situation, you know, I'm such an overthinker. Just made
me think of this. And a couple of weeks ago
this happened to me, you know how, like when people
like will repost things. I mean, come on, we all
have our moments where we're like, oh my god, is
that about me? And so I had this moment with
a friend and oh really yes, and she had posted
(11:13):
something and I was like, oh my gosh. I mean
my brain just could not shut off. I was like,
this has to be about me, you know, I mean,
it just has to be. We just had this situation.
So I send her this long message to do the thing.
I was like, Okay, I felt really stupid. But I
feel like this is about me. I'm such an overthinker.
Ball it ended up she said it wasn't about me.
Hopefully it wasn't really about me. But isn't that the worst?
Speaker 2 (11:34):
Feet do you do that? I mean I have, Oh,
I haven't recently, but I mean, I I'm just trying
to think. I mean, it's been it's been a while
since I have. But yes, if it was something, if
something had just happened, to talk to her, maybe about
her on here, right, Yeah I saw something.
Speaker 5 (11:53):
That's when I would overthink, right right, but no, I
mean KB she also she had took a qu little
break to deal with a kid thing. So I'll say
this right now. But you know, and I would say
to her two if she was here in this moment.
But you know, she posts a lot of things. Yeah,
could easily, but I don't. I know hers don't, Yeah,
(12:13):
hers don't, I think.
Speaker 3 (12:14):
I mean, if you post them a lot, or don't
like Kristin posts them a lot. Yeah, Like it's so
I couldn't spend my time over thinking if I had
done something, but this person doesn't yet and something it
just happened.
Speaker 2 (12:26):
So I was like, well, if something it just happened totally.
Speaker 4 (12:28):
Yeah, then I would do you say something? Would you
say something?
Speaker 2 (12:32):
I would?
Speaker 5 (12:32):
Yeah, Like if I was in Shane's position, I have
one hundred percent would have done the exact same thing. Yeah,
I've been like, oh my gosh, I'm so sorry.
Speaker 4 (12:39):
Yeah, I think that's so sweet.
Speaker 5 (12:41):
I appreciated that. Yeah, I thought, you know, I'm just
like I miss you little saying.
Speaker 2 (12:44):
You know, it's hard.
Speaker 5 (12:45):
It's like we're all in this busy season, and but
it was, it was very it was very sweet.
Speaker 4 (12:49):
Yeah that is sweet.
Speaker 2 (12:51):
What else is going on?
Speaker 4 (12:52):
Oh, you know what, I'm in a funk. Man. I'm
just gonna be honest.
Speaker 3 (12:56):
I really really am I was supposed to do Okay, so.
Speaker 5 (12:59):
You know, I'm like a great conversation because you weren't
here for romans be day, but there's a conversation we had.
Speaker 2 (13:05):
Yeah that speaks to this, So go ahead, okay.
Speaker 3 (13:08):
I just I don't know if it's the time of year,
I don't know, if it's like I'm just exhausted.
Speaker 4 (13:14):
I don't know what it is.
Speaker 3 (13:15):
But my motivation, first of all, is very low and
it's not like work wise, like I think it's because
work slowing down. It's causing my motivation to just be
like plummet, right, And I get like this, and then
I get like, oh my gosh, the holidays are coming up.
If I don't do anything social, then people aren't going
to invite me, and then I'm not going to have
anything to do, and then I'm really going to be depressed.
This happens to me like every year. I feel like,
(13:37):
but I was supposed to. I was like, I'm gonna
be so good. And I had these sweet friends invite
me to go to Christmas Village with a group of
bootball somewhere in Nashville. It's like where you go and
just like all these vendors are set up and you
like shop.
Speaker 2 (13:49):
And stuff like the Dickens Franklin thing kind of.
Speaker 3 (13:53):
But it's like, I think it's just like more just
like inside and just shopping.
Speaker 2 (13:57):
Got it.
Speaker 3 (13:58):
And at first, and even when she invited me, she
was like, I know this really isn't your thing, but
I want you to know that you're invited. And I'm
like that is so sweet, right, And I was like
someone knows you're lovely, Yes, yes, absolutely, And I was
like this is so sweet.
Speaker 4 (14:12):
And I was like I would.
Speaker 3 (14:13):
Actually love to go, so then, of course, and then
in that moment, I would love to go, you know.
And so then it like gets closer to time, and
all this stuff's coming up this weekend and I'm feeling
not motivated, I'm feeling tired, and I'm like, but I'm
gonna do it.
Speaker 4 (14:26):
I'm gonna be social.
Speaker 3 (14:27):
I don't know any of these people besides the two
people that invited me, Like, I don't even know who's
going on the text Shane, I got nobody's numbers, you know,
and so that gives me major, yeah, major anxiety as
it is. So then I'm like, all right, it's fine,
I'm gonna do this. I'm gonna have a little drink
before I go, you know. And then Ramsey that morning
is like, you're taking me to softball lessons, right, because
(14:49):
you said that's our thing. We're going to go on
Thursdays to softball lessons. And I was like, oh, baby,
I have And so here goes Ramsey. I love her,
God bless her, but she can make me feel like
the worst pair sometimes.
Speaker 2 (15:01):
So then she I think it's the age too, is it? Well?
Speaker 5 (15:03):
Because I left trick or Treating early because I wanted
to obviously bring Roman back to bathe them, and she's like,
you're lading me. I'm like, you didn't care about last year,
you were off and now all of a sudden, I'm
so confused. And I just did you know the last
hour and there's five other moms here that.
Speaker 3 (15:20):
Yeah, you know, we're all that makes me feel better, yeah,
because I'm just like, well, I already don't want to go,
but I'm like trying to be good, you know, and
then now you're making me feel like crap. So I
was just like, so I sat on it for hours,
and then I was just like and so I just
sent a message and I was like, I can't do it.
Speaker 4 (15:38):
I'm just gonna be honest, like I need to go
out doing it.
Speaker 2 (15:40):
No.
Speaker 3 (15:41):
Oh not in the least. I'm I'm thankful that I
ended up going with Ramsey. I'm thankful that I made
that choice. I mean, if I would have done nothing,
then yes, if I was just sitting at home, I'd
be like, man, I should have gone, you know. But
I mean she came home, we sat in bed and
we colored for a couple hours. We went we had dinner,
(16:02):
and then we went to her lessons so I'm glad
that I gave her that time, but also I don't know.
Speaker 2 (16:10):
It's kind of twofold.
Speaker 3 (16:11):
It's like mix, like I want to be social during
this time, I want to be included in Christmas stuff,
but at the same time, I've got no motivation to
do anything, and I just I need to get out
of this bunk. Honestly, That's kind of where I'm at.
Speaker 5 (16:23):
Well, what I've been recently told is that.
Speaker 2 (16:27):
So okay.
Speaker 5 (16:27):
So I texted Nate are our doctor, dude, and I said,
something is up with me, and I don't know what
it is. I said, I'm depressed. I'm tired. I was like,
it is twelve and I'm barely I'm like almost falling
asleep driving to my hairplace. I was like, I feel off,
I said, I went to bed last night at eight thirty.
(16:47):
I just I'm like, I'm and then again I look
at it the side the same thing as you. I
get depressed because I'm like, oh, I don't know when
my next thing is? What am I doing in the slowdown?
I need that motivation. But also this is usually around
the time that I'm excited to slow down.
Speaker 4 (17:02):
Right right.
Speaker 5 (17:03):
So he had texted me and he said, he just
said a big video about how the depression of daylight
savings really messes people up and it takes a minute
for your system to get acclimated to it.
Speaker 2 (17:18):
That makes sense, Yeah, I know. I was like wow.
Speaker 5 (17:20):
But also I was doing a gut cleanse too, and
I just had an eboot treatment and stems out cheese.
So he's like, your body's when you detox, you also
can get depressed. So I said, okay, well just but
he did mention the daylights. But it's funny. As I
was talking to another girlfriend and then I talked to
Pam and Kristen last night and they were saying the
same thing. They're just like they're so tired, so tired,
motivated and just in a funk. And I said, oh, daylights.
Speaker 4 (17:43):
Yeah, say maybe that's it.
Speaker 2 (17:44):
Look into it, you guys, because apparently that's what is.
Speaker 4 (17:47):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (17:47):
Like I knew about like seasonal depression, which doesn't usually
hit me. I'm usually good once that, And I think
another part of this, this is funny. We actually talked
about this for a second the other day and I
thought about this later and we didn't talk about it long.
I get I'm not good at like decorating for Christmas
and stuff like I don't think I'm gifted at that,
like I want to be. I want it to be beautiful.
(18:08):
Well then I see everyone start posting and it gets
earlier and earlier every year. Well then it starts to
get to me because then I have that pressure of like, well,
I need to decorate and I need it to look
like that, and like why is everybody so much in
the spirit already, like I'm buying presents, but like, ah,
you know, so just like it's just where my brain
has been lately.
Speaker 2 (18:27):
At the pace you want to go at, friend.
Speaker 4 (18:28):
I know, I just wish I was. I need to
hire someone.
Speaker 5 (18:30):
Fine, start of business, let's start a girlfriend. I just
PLoP it in places. But it looks good. I hear
you though, girl, But let's look into that seasonal depression.
Also taking a talk to your doctor. But Saffron is
a supplement that my doctor recommended to take in the morning.
Speaker 2 (18:46):
It's just helps with mood enhances.
Speaker 5 (18:48):
I just stabilized, so so I'll do it.
Speaker 2 (18:51):
I know, I went straight down there. I was like, Saffron,
let's do this.
Speaker 5 (18:54):
Oh, so Seinfeld's moment, I was going to Dix because
I am surprising Jace almost just uh was careful with
(19:19):
my words, but I'm like, he can't listen.
Speaker 2 (19:21):
But now we're just careful. Everybody's listening. I'm surprising him
with a basketball, like they're the guy's pouring the concrete
and he's there going away. So when he comes home,
I'm going to put a big bow on the basketball
hoop outside. We need to do this if I need
to know how your experience goes. Yeah, on the list.
Speaker 5 (19:38):
So I go to Dick's and obviously the handicapped parking
spots one hundred percent up in front. But what pisses
me off is and then they do they do this
at Whole Foods.
Speaker 2 (19:50):
They do this I believe.
Speaker 5 (19:51):
At Walmart now because we were just there as well,
and at Dicks, but more so at the the Whole Foods.
Speaker 2 (19:58):
But it's the or pick up. Have the next three
to four spots, and I'm like, listen, if you're coming
to go get your grocery, they put the parking spots
in the back, like you're already lazy to go pick
up your groceries. You don't need to park close. You
need to park close. Let us part close because we're
hauling the groceries back, So I'm sorry. The pre the
(20:21):
online pick up things in those the next few lanes,
they pissed me off, so I parked in it. Revel,
she did it. I have another one for you.
Speaker 3 (20:32):
Well, hold on, I have I have a Devil's advocate
for this. It's for the workers that have to go back.
And can you imagine if you were the worker, Okay,
they had to go, then understand that point of view.
Speaker 2 (20:45):
The worker that gets paid to walk, I know.
Speaker 4 (20:47):
But if you have to go back and forth and
get them the whole.
Speaker 2 (20:49):
Time, like I understand that, then yeah, because you have
shoppers that are trying to come in and spend their money.
Speaker 4 (20:55):
And do the work, I get that point of view.
Speaker 3 (20:58):
I'm just saying, God, I have seen these workers go
like back and forth.
Speaker 4 (21:03):
I have when it gets really busy, especially.
Speaker 2 (21:05):
Like that makes sense, but when it's a target has
a side entrance, which I think is brilliant. One of
our targets here do that. They have this like other
entrance where they do the customer pick up, and those
spots are close to the building, but they're far away
and that's doing it.
Speaker 3 (21:19):
And just so we know, I'm so lazy that I'm
not even driving up to do it. I'm getting it
delivered to myself. So at that point, I'm not even
taking up the spot. Okay, Okay, so.
Speaker 2 (21:27):
You're actually not in this conversation about that. Minds you though.
When we were at DICKX, the whole parking lot was
completely open, but it did make me no smart.
Speaker 4 (21:35):
I noticed it and thought about it too.
Speaker 2 (21:37):
There's something else we're doing here in Nashville that I'm
really upset about. Okay, we have VIP parking, now what,
Oh I know at the Green Hills Mall and at
Galeria now, oh, what we have vip par I've done it.
I have done it.
Speaker 4 (21:51):
I've done it too.
Speaker 2 (21:52):
But I'm like, this isn't fair. Part of the retail
experience is getting that spot and going, oh, we're gonna
have a good deal today. Part of it is pulling
up and seeing somebody that is just wrapped up their
shopping and putting your blinker on and just knowing you're
setting the tone for your trip and now they're all
empty and just being waited.
Speaker 4 (22:11):
Waited to pay for that is frustrating.
Speaker 2 (22:13):
That's it's crazy. What are we doing to the park
linding ways? The rules of the parking lot have always
been what they will be. It is up to God
and karma if you get the close spot that has nothing.
This is not up to you to delegates more than ten,
is it.
Speaker 4 (22:31):
I'm that's ridiculous. I can't believe I did that.
Speaker 2 (22:34):
And then while you're shopping and get an alert because
we all paid for it, that says, hey, yeah, do
you want to pay more running through the store to
hurry up your thing? And then I've got friends who
maybe like you don't even pay it and just park
their anyway, and they're like, you know, forget it, I
don't care, And I'm does that work so far? They
don't have tickets or anything, And I'm like, it would
be my luck that if I didn't pay.
Speaker 4 (22:55):
I don't think we should do that, And that's that's
not advice.
Speaker 2 (22:58):
I know, Well, you would manage your cat. What's on
your thinking cat?
Speaker 4 (23:01):
No, I'm yeah, I mean, hey, I'm a valet person
throwing through amen.
Speaker 2 (23:04):
The easiest, the better. But I just also was like,
that's not how this works.
Speaker 3 (23:08):
We all know, I know, And there's so many of them,
so many Yeah, I agree.
Speaker 2 (23:12):
I make it like one parking lot where we all
just decide, you know, this is your VIP parking. Oh
you're supposed to like have to wait and part of
like if you ever listen to the secret manifesting your
parking spot, like that's all part of the exercise and
all they're just taking it away. Anyways, we just really
went with that. Sorry, I'll just never forget. I know
you really to thank you for taking my fires me up.
(23:33):
I know, and it's actually really smart. You're right. I
mean I still do that thing whenever we do get
it a close up parking spot, I still do it.
My mom said, like, looks like we're going to get
a good deal today, you know, because we got a
good spot. No, I didn't know that was the thing.
Speaker 4 (23:48):
That's cute.
Speaker 2 (23:49):
It is cute. It sets the tone for your shopping trip. Yeah,
got it. It's made a good front spot. Then that
means you're going to get a good deal. Okay, you're
destined to have a bogo day.
Speaker 5 (24:00):
One of the stories, Let's be a Midwestern Things see
Britney snowtoks rewiring her brain after years of having so
much disdain for my body. Britney Snow's opening up up
about her overcoming her body image struggles. The actress thirty
nine at are issues with body image began an early age,
recalling moments where she would hoard women's fitness magazines in
(24:20):
her teenage years. She couldn't even be naked around myself.
She said, I had so much disdain for my body,
and I couldn't see myself as a functional, beautiful being.
I only saw the things that were wrong with me.
That led to the act that led the actress struggling
with inarexia, exercise, bolimia, depression, and self harm. She said
she had to rewire her brain and learn to trust
(24:43):
herself again. She said, I think rewiring my brain where
I could count on myself and I could trust myself,
I could be in a space and feel like I
wasn't going to do something harmful to myself was the
best thing that ever could have happened to my recovery.
So she also said that she had a couple stints
and an inpatient rehab center, but it was outpatient program
where she committed two for a year that saved her life. Listen,
(25:07):
I am the hugest advocate for rewiring your brain. I mean,
I think that's what EMDR was so helpful for me
with a lot of my anxiety. But I will just
say the on the body side of things, I mean,
I'll never forget it's we're all in the same age.
(25:28):
We're all i mean, we're two years older than Brittany.
But reading those magazines. I used to read those magazines
like the Glamours and the Women's Health how to lose
five pounds, and I mean there was just and it's
such a young age in my twenties, I'm trying to
figure out how to how to lose this weight. And
you know, again growing up with Britney Spears and all
(25:49):
those when talking about body and weight, it's just it's wild.
Speaker 2 (25:54):
It's sad. I was going to say it has to
be our generation, yep, because I still do this. I mean,
I'm just gonna be honest, like there's days where I'm going,
oughf only this, if only you know, and I'm but
I have this like healthy, wonderful body that's capable, and
that's a blessing in itself. And I try to but
it is so ingrained in me. You know, like there's
(26:17):
even fitness programs that our friends are doing where it's
like count the macros and do this, and do that,
and I'm like, I can't do that be slippery slope
for me because I can get compulsive about that very quickly. Yeah,
and that's just not I need to exercise with with
my ABS being like a fun perk. It's mostly for
like anxiety and like my mood and I can't hyper
(26:37):
focus or I can go on slippery slopes. It's not
like way better now than I've ever been, way way better.
But I I mean I was boleemic. I mean I
means anybody else had a needing disorder.
Speaker 5 (26:49):
No, I when I was in middle school, I was
a figure skater.
Speaker 2 (26:57):
And I don't don't how do I say this?
Speaker 5 (27:04):
Like I had written this letter and I had to
go to the counselors like all the girls. So the
girls that were here, like some of the girls they
I had given this letter to Lisa, Oh, Lisa, I
know she took it to the counselor sweet mol Yeah.
But looking back in that moment, I mean I remember
coming home and shoving because I was saying I was
like start for myself. It was during the time like
the early start of my parents' divorce. And so that
(27:28):
was eighth grade, and well I got home and I'm
like shoving donuts to like prove to my mom like
that I didn't have. I just I wanted attention truly
in that moment. So I can't say that was a
needing disorder, but that was an attention piece. But when
I was with my acts, I had a compulsion with
the scale because that was all that I could.
Speaker 2 (27:48):
Control in that moment. It was always a control thing
for me. Yeah yeah, so that couldn't control his affairs,
but I could control the number on the scale. And
I also think that you put yourself in media, are acting,
you know, like all of that. That's like a whole
thing too. That's a crazy other people, a million other
people then are critiquing your body, not just you. But
but I've never been I would never say I was
(28:10):
had an eating disorder. Yeah, I was really in it.
And one of my very best friends also had. She
was anarexic, and I remember sitting down with her and
saying like, you know, like I'm really scared for you,
Like it got really bad, Kat, what we're gonna say.
Speaker 3 (28:25):
I just wonder in these moments, like yes, we had
the magazines you know then, but like truly, what was
the difference, what was the difference in you said that
you had an eating disorder at some point, and you
looking at the magazine and me look at looking at
the magazine. What like I'm thinking about my daughters. Like
what causes some a child, a young person to look
(28:48):
at that and think that they have to change and
they're not happy with themselves versus someone else.
Speaker 2 (28:52):
You know what I mean.
Speaker 3 (28:53):
Like, it can't just just be the magazines, because you
know what I mean, Or it can't just be social
media because we want to blame you know, I want
to blame so much on social media now, And we
didn't have social media right exactly, so then it was magazines.
Speaker 5 (29:05):
Yeah, and even now, I mean Julie she doesn't have
social media. But this is like a month or so ago.
She said something about she wants to be thin. I'm like, honey,
you are thin, like what you you have a beautiful.
Speaker 2 (29:15):
Body, you know.
Speaker 5 (29:16):
Yeah, But it was because she said she said she
was fat. I said to honey, I was like, who
said that? Because I'm like, that is so. But she
was wearing the wrong size clothes clothes, so because she said, well,
nothing fits me at daddy's so I had to like
call my ax and be like, hey, we got to
get the right cause she's now getting a body complex
right that she can't send their case.
Speaker 2 (29:37):
You know.
Speaker 5 (29:37):
And so he was like, oh my god, I didn't
even like you know, so we like, but how quick
that can just happen like that?
Speaker 4 (29:43):
That's that's so scary. Yeah, like what how do you
avoid that?
Speaker 2 (29:47):
Is?
Speaker 4 (29:48):
I guess where I'm going with that, Like how do
you Well.
Speaker 2 (29:50):
I think it's modeled to us too by parents, like
just like a satisfaction with our bodies and like a
healthy appreciation doing the shot. Yeah, you said you've had
conversations with.
Speaker 3 (30:04):
Yeah, I'd agree with that because I have seen people
close to me and how the parents talk and then
how the kids start to and so to be very
careful of that. So yes, i'd agree with that. And
that's what scares me about the you know, about the shot.
And I try to make sure that even if I'm
not very hungry, like I'm still eating in front of them,
you know, and stuff like that, even though I do
(30:24):
eat plenty. You know, it's not that I don't now
at all, but I don't know that just it just
really scares me being in you know, in cheer that
Emmy is in you know, all of that just really
scares me. And it's like, how, I mean, that is
so sad to hear from Brittany that she, I mean
had to rewire her brain.
Speaker 2 (30:43):
I still but I feel like.
Speaker 5 (30:45):
We all kind of in those that age and like
I had to rewire my brain for the looking at
the scale. I mean there's times when where I guy said,
I still I have that human health and I look
at it now for my body fat percentage in the
visceral fat, which I think girl important for overall health.
But there are still times when I look at the
number and it was like, well, what's the pound heavier
(31:05):
and having to retrain. No, don't go depressed, because that's
right where most women will go if they don't see
the number they want on the scale.
Speaker 2 (31:14):
Yeah, there is this, Like there was a study that
came out though when we were younger, Like I mean,
this isn't this is before social media for sure. That
was by the time we had reached like eighteen, we
had seen over this many ads. Remember it was commercial,
so we have social media, but we had commercials.
Speaker 4 (31:29):
It was the same thing, kind of like indoctrinating our BRAINSPI.
Speaker 5 (31:32):
It just kind of lectures Jenny Kragish loser.
Speaker 2 (31:35):
You know, true. Yeah, so we were kind of always
inundated with like magazines showed someone like calling them fat,
and you know, the blog, the vlog or the the
pres Hiltons of the world, you know what I mean
were we had shows the Biggest Loser and yeah, yeah,
people's way.
Speaker 5 (31:55):
So it's always been there. Women in general, I feel
like they don't touch the body. Women's bodies now from
what I.
Speaker 4 (32:02):
Yeah, definitely got that I've gotten better.
Speaker 3 (32:04):
It's almost like it almost feels like, you know, now
it's kind of changed in a sense that they want
more shape, yeah, to bodies, you know, and stuff like that.
But then as they get older, like do they really
you know, I don't know. It's it's it's hard to say,
but that that stuff scares me.
Speaker 2 (32:19):
I will say.
Speaker 5 (32:20):
What's sad too, is the most you know, people will
anytime I've ever seen anything negative about my body or
something is always from another woman. And that's the part
that always makes me sad too, because it's like, can
we just not comment on other people's bodies?
Speaker 2 (32:35):
Ye ever? Yeah, wild other women's bodies please? Yeah? Or kids?
Speaker 5 (32:42):
Oh well, I think there's something too. I had a
friend and I want to say it was like more
like acquaintance, but her mom was super super like working out,
I mean crazy amounts, right, and eating.
Speaker 2 (32:55):
You can't have that.
Speaker 5 (32:56):
You can so so strict on so many things that
to this day in her mid thirties, she is so paranoid,
so so overly where it's like I got it's like
I gotta work out.
Speaker 2 (33:10):
I catte that where it's just like it's okay, like
you're good you you don't have to obsess. But she
took on her mom's obsession of image. And that's where
I'm like, I've always seen that, and I thought to myself,
not trying to judge, but going I don't want my daughter.
I guess that's why I'm like everything in moderation, and
(33:31):
even though doctor Amon says, don't do everything in moderation,
but I do think as a child, I'm not I
don't want to be that parent that's like you can
never have that.
Speaker 3 (33:39):
I've seen that backfire way too many times. And in
the opposite way, they get away because their parents and
they're hoarding. That's right, Andy like restrictiveness, I do not.
I don't know what doctor Aymond says about that, but
I absolutely don't know.
Speaker 2 (33:51):
No, he's not saying kids.
Speaker 5 (33:53):
I don't know what he says about kid, but he's
saying when it comes to us, like don't say you
drink in moderation, moderation, you're give yourself excuse and that
she don't do that. That's not good for you. But
for you know, kids, it's do I let them have
dessert every night? No, but you know some nights yes,
because I don't want them to not have that. I
(34:13):
don't want them to feel that. And then also I'm
not getting them on treadmills like I know some kids
the age of Julie, they're like working them out.
Speaker 2 (34:22):
Oh wow, it's not good for their bones. But again
I don't want to judge.
Speaker 5 (34:26):
I just also have seen but this is where things
can maybe start with body image. I think it's important
for kids. Like we go for walks. We love family walks. Yeah,
it's one of our favorite times. It's getting and the kids.
The kids ask for it now after dinner, like can
we go for a family walk? I mean we just
did it. It was at six fifteen a night dark
out hold bundled up.
Speaker 2 (34:47):
They're like, let's go for a walk. It's good for
our heart health.
Speaker 1 (34:49):
You know.
Speaker 2 (34:50):
The kid's just like, yes, let's do it. Yeah, so movement.
But I'm so glad And again, I'm also just proud
of her for speaking out, speaking out of it, because
there's so many women that obviously and men too that
have felt this rewiring your brain so important always. I
don't know if she used EMDR, but that's one of
the ways that you can rewire your brain. Krischelle Stoule
(35:25):
says she's officially leaving Selling Sunset after nine seasons. She
will not be returning. It has yet to get picked
up for a ten season. I'm sure it will, but yeah,
she says, she's gotten to a place where I don't
need the show financially. I'm lucky to have other forms
of employment because it's no longer good for my mental health.
The reunion was so brutal, and that moment I realized
I will be done here going forward, she said, before
(35:47):
adding I wish everyone the best, but this isn't the
place for me.
Speaker 5 (35:50):
I felt like a little bit like it felt like
a little bit like a dogpile. Would you I think
about her fight with Emma and not liking your boyfriend.
They didn't watch the reunion.
Speaker 4 (35:57):
Yeah, I watched all of it.
Speaker 5 (35:58):
Yeah, I've watched the reunion and I'm almost finished with
the show.
Speaker 3 (36:02):
I like both of them, and it's I you know,
I hate that they're not friends anymore.
Speaker 4 (36:07):
I think that I was telling Jana this, I'm.
Speaker 5 (36:11):
Like, well, we should talk about this because this is
an interesting piece because you very much did not like
my access friend.
Speaker 3 (36:16):
Right and well, and I'm seeing that. I was like, man,
I can feel Chrishelle so much in these episodes when
she was first starting, like she didn't always handle it
the right way, but she just did not think he
was good for her. And he also she also did
not think that Emma really liked him, you know, like
that she really, you know, was it just was not
did not seem like a healthy relationship. And I don't know,
(36:39):
they touched on it a little bit, but she just
didn't like them, and she cared for her friend. What
I saw was Chrischelle caring for her friend. I've been there.
That's how I felt for Jana. It's such a hard
place to how do you tell them, like, you know,
she didn't always handle it the right way, So I
actually kind of will defend her on that. Now, there
were times where she seemed so snotty, snow so like
(37:01):
bratty about it because he was like not good enough
for you know, or whatever. Like the way she handled
some things. I'm like, Okay, you could have been nicer
about that. But but then she went to social media
and she did all that, and I think that's where
the line was really drawn, probably for Emma.
Speaker 5 (37:18):
I mean, I had said this to you, I said,
if you ever if we were going through something, I
couldn't imagine you ever going taking it to social media.
I understand where she was saying, we're we're a reality show,
but there's a difference between crossing the line of doing
different putting.
Speaker 2 (37:32):
I just could never you were my best friend.
Speaker 5 (37:35):
I could never imagine you saying something like that over
social media.
Speaker 2 (37:40):
Yeah well.
Speaker 5 (37:43):
No, maybe just save save it for the season, right,
you know, But it's you know, I think that's two
people hurt, Yeah, both of them. But why are you
bringing it to social media? Like that's not a good friend?
Speaker 4 (37:56):
No, you know what I'm saying. The intention got odd there.
Speaker 3 (38:01):
I will say, I think we missed a lot this season,
and I don't know if y'all have looked at some
things on social media about this. I think a lot
of things were cut out that Jason had some you know,
power over getting some things cut out. If you really go,
you haven't watched the whole see if you really go,
there's a lot of blow ups that seem to kind
of not make sense. There's been some been some things
(38:23):
that have been edited and that have been taken out
of it that it's kind of out of order in
some things.
Speaker 2 (38:28):
So there's a lot of things that are.
Speaker 3 (38:29):
Really weird about this season, not necessarily with Krishelle and Emma,
but with Chelsea and Brie by Mary. Chelsea and Mary,
there's something there that was cut out. They had a
huge blow up.
Speaker 2 (38:43):
Sondra kind of alluded to this yes in the interview
with her. She kind of just chatted like, you didn't
see that, you didn't see that.
Speaker 3 (38:49):
There's a lot I think that was cut out this Jason.
That just leaves a lot of questions and what really
happened and why is everyone so angry and why you know,
what is this blow up truly about? Because it seems
so small on the show, So there was just a
lot to it this season.
Speaker 5 (39:03):
Well, that's why I can never do a reality show
because the mental health aspect. So props to Koshelle for
just doing what's best for her.
Speaker 4 (39:11):
Absolutely, yeah, and it is so sad. I hate it
for Emma.
Speaker 2 (39:14):
Well, that's the thing. It's I understand. I mean, I
had one friend who very much, you know, we stopped
being friends because she did not like the person that
I was with many years ago. And that always hurt
me because I'm like, man, if you were my friend,
you wouldn't have treated me like that. And I always
think about you. You were this tough love as tough love
(39:34):
can get, and you started to create boundaries where you
wouldn't work on things with us, but you would never
would have stopped being my friend.
Speaker 4 (39:41):
No, that never ever crossed my mind. Ever.
Speaker 2 (39:44):
Now you do get, and I do.
Speaker 3 (39:46):
You can see Chrischelle get to that point a little
bit where she's like, Okay, I've got to have some
boundaries here, and she.
Speaker 2 (39:50):
Told us about that. That's so good and that's.
Speaker 3 (39:52):
Healthy, and that's where you just have to be honest
and just say all right, here's my boundary and I'm
here for you.
Speaker 2 (39:57):
Yeah, you know, and there's a way to do it
kind of sounded like she did say that, but maybe
something else was.
Speaker 3 (40:02):
Well, then she was social media, so maybe she had
all the best intentions, but then she ruined it in
that single moment by going to social media.
Speaker 2 (40:09):
And perhaps this her signing off is because she realized
she didn't like the person she was becoming.
Speaker 3 (40:14):
Yeah, and maybe and that I hope so too, because
that happens to the best of us. Chod, Like, if
you watch these episodes, I firmly believe she cares about
Emma like so, so, so so much and it was
just hard for her to sit back and watch it
and see her.
Speaker 2 (40:28):
Go through that so well.
Speaker 5 (40:30):
I I mean again, I love her, so it's it'll
be a different show without her.
Speaker 2 (40:35):
So it wind of that makes me moving out want
to watch.
Speaker 3 (40:39):
Well, I'm afraid we could end up we that they
could end up losing other people for the show too. Yeah,
I would be interested to see what happens.
Speaker 2 (40:46):
Or they'll cast somebody to take over that role.
Speaker 4 (40:49):
Yeah, yeah, we'll see.
Speaker 5 (40:51):
Hey, ladies, I'm thirty one years old and my husband
twenty nine and I have been together for six years,
married for almost one year. We have two kids, a
toddler and a four month old are sex life is
pretty much non existent. I'd say we probably have sex
about once every six months or so. Between being busy
with young kids and working full time, I'm just never
in the mood. But this isn't the only reason. My
(41:12):
husband often expresses frustration at the fact that I never
want to be intimate. He thinks sex is the only
form of intimacy, and recently I've tried to explain my reasoning.
Aside from my exhaustion, I explained to him that I'm
not like him in that I can't just be in
the mood to have sex whenever at any given moment.
I need to feel aroused and have that connection with
(41:33):
someone who makes me feel special. We never go on dates.
He doesn't do anything to make me feel special, and
he doesn't do anything to make me want to have
sex or get in the mood to have sex. His
response was, I understand, but I don't think I should
always have to earn sex. This response just angered me
because I'm like, well, okay, I don't feel like I
(41:53):
should have to have sex with you when I don't
feel like it because you want to. That comment was
kind of disgusting to me and made me feel like
an object. I don't feel like it's crazy or unreasonable
to want to have a connection with your partner in
order to have sex.
Speaker 2 (42:06):
Am I wrong?
Speaker 5 (42:08):
He also asked me for a blowjob every single day,
usually in exchange for something like doing all the night
feeds with our baby. I almost always say no, because again,
I'm not in the mood to give a blowjob every day,
and him straight up asking me for it on the
daily annoys me and makes me want to do it
even less. There once was a time when things were
new and exciting and I couldn't wait to rip our
(42:29):
clothes off. I miss feeling that way with somebody, where
you can't keep your hands off of each other. If
it's passionate and the mood to have sex is more frequent,
is it just married life with kids? Or has our
emotional and sexual connection died? Oh, this sweet listener, I know.
Speaker 2 (42:47):
Well, first and foremost. I love the fact that she
said something to him, Yeah, And I don't love his response.
I don't either. It seems really emotionally unintelligent to me,
so I'm struggling. Also, asking for a blowjob made me
like I'm instantly turned off. I found our heart be
so annoyed, like are you kid as a reward I
did the dishes or I did the night fee.
Speaker 3 (43:09):
I mean, I guess I could understand to an extent,
maybe him being like.
Speaker 4 (43:14):
Hey, I'll take this feed like, I get it.
Speaker 2 (43:16):
You got like, dude, that's not.
Speaker 4 (43:18):
The way to do it. It's less.
Speaker 2 (43:21):
I think you can relate in the aspect. Yeah. So
when it's something where when they're asking that makes you
not want.
Speaker 3 (43:29):
To absolutely, yeah, absolutely, I mean I can relate to
that big time. I mean I get it, and it's like,
but I see both sides to it. You know, it's
like they don't want to feel like they've earned it.
But then you're over here going yeah, but you don't
do X, Y and Z and you stop asking, like
I don't know why the asking gets so annoying.
Speaker 2 (43:49):
Well, it's also just not hot to me.
Speaker 4 (43:51):
Yeah, it's not.
Speaker 2 (43:52):
I'm going to say something probably really unpopular. Listeners going
to hate this, y'all are probably going to hate this too,
But here I go, Oh, I like it already. I
like the YEP. I don't like anything that your husband
has said or is doing. I'm just gonna like straight
up say that don't like that, but tonight, just do
it like before he says it. I know you're tired, yeah,
(44:16):
trust me, I get it. We all get it. Exhausted,
don't want to, but there is going to be I
hope that by you taking that initiative without him asking,
because just just do it before you can ask. Second,
you put that baby down. Just muster up, take a shot,
I don't know, like muster out any sort of because
(44:36):
he is your husband and you love him, right, you're not.
You're not leaving this to like you love him, do
do something that also gets him excited that with it
so that he doesn't have to ask, and this might
re itgne reignite the spark that and does something for
him too, and then maybe he'll ask you less. But
(44:58):
just try it and and say maybe the next day
be like, listen, I would probably do that more if
you asked less. And also next time, you know, I
want to be dated first, so like kiss me first,
and like those are the things. If you want more
of this, I need more of this and hopefully he
can give you a better a better response. But listen,
(45:21):
if you have to make yourself aroused during this time,
do the soft kisses like be the little vixen that's right,
and get yourself aroused and use him like a frickin toy.
It's called Samantha Jones mode. Just do it and just
see the difference in it, and then and then try
to communicate the next day or something. But maybe there'll
be a different version. It'll help reignite. I don't know.
(45:43):
I also just want to say you are not wrong
when you said am I wrong? Not wrong? You are
not wrong. This is obnoxious, immature boy behavior. We are
not in college. He's a father and a husband, and
also have sex with your husband. It's going to just
be better, like we run. That is one of the
things I wish I would have changed early on in
our marriage was like, now we have sex so often
(46:03):
it's just so great and there's no like it's almost
chicken her egg, and you get like, well if you
did this and I do that, and you do this,
like to your point, just remember like we get so
room mate, and I hate that feeling as couples. I'm
not saying like us at our house, but we have
done that too where we've gotten roommate modem and we
need to make out and remember that we're boyfriend, girlfriend,
(46:24):
and that there is you know, like plan the date
and and sometimes I have to plan the day.
Speaker 5 (46:30):
Yeah, and sometimes the man wants to feel wanted, wanted
and sexy. It is like the difference between men and
their head will spin in the best way and you
might see a different version and you actually will feel sexy,
like I feel sexy, like I miss feeling sexy, and
he thinks you're sexy.
Speaker 3 (46:48):
So do yeah now, And just to remember, the further
you get away from it, the easier it is to
not do it.
Speaker 2 (46:53):
And that's it gets.
Speaker 3 (46:54):
It kind of gets away from you, especially as a
woman who doesn't you know, need it, don't necessarily need it,
you don't have that much. Like the further you get
away from it, the easier it is to stay in
that place.
Speaker 4 (47:05):
And that's what I learned.
Speaker 3 (47:06):
So you just kind of, like like Jana said, just
do it because it'll just get further and further away.
Speaker 2 (47:10):
And give yourself grace. You have little kids, yeah, like
you have tiny kids. Have a fun night. Follow up
with us
Wind Down with Janet Kramer an I'm Heeart Radio podcast.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
Hi guys, Hi, Oh are you doing? Oh? Just over
your conteplain? How much to share? As usual normal wind
down podcast day.
Speaker 3 (00:17):
Isn't that how everyone starts? Like you have all these
things in your head and you're.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
Like, do I talk about this? Do I not? You know? Yeah?
I got a question answer any update from your friend? None?
Oh that's okay. The friends still follow yeah, oh just
checking in. There's time. Well, it's always when it's this
social clip that I'm like, oh, we want to get
(00:42):
somewhere with this one.
Speaker 3 (00:44):
It gives that I'm not gonna lie every time the
tag comes through, I'm like, oh, same, Like, hold your breath,
what's the social clip going to be?
Speaker 2 (00:53):
Well? This is interesting, lovely segue, Oh boy, Because sometimes
you don't have to have the clip absolutely to cause drama. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (01:02):
I mean, I can't tell you how many times I
go to Hannah and go, this is not going on socials.
Speaker 2 (01:07):
She's like ah, and then here we are, and how
many requests for a show talking about said potential drama. Yeah,
that was not a clip that I'm like, let's talk
about it.
Speaker 3 (01:19):
Nick the other day was like are you just gonna
stop talking about these things because things keep happening? And
I'm like, you know, I don't think I am. I
just you know, it is what it is, even when
it go ahead. No please, sorry, I was gonna say
even when it comes to haunt you two three months later,
like you just listen.
Speaker 2 (01:37):
I here's a positive of it talking about it. Guess
who booked a three and a half week stay in
Tennessee Nana and Papa.
Speaker 1 (01:48):
Oh well then well that might be a little there
you go, you know, I think now, yeah, they booked
an airbnb to come to come hang and be with
the game.
Speaker 3 (02:00):
Really been listening every day, they know, they know the battery.
Speaker 2 (02:07):
Well what else can we work up in this little laboratory?
Let's stay though, So that's what we're different. I would
have never know, well, I mean three weeks and I
would do. I would do like a week and a half. Hey,
fun fact. Yeah yeah. Preston's mom has come for two
different two weeks since before and stayed with me for
(02:27):
two weeks and I absolutely adore having her. Right, So
I just want to I just want to throw that
well because I feel like my reputations, well, I just
feel like, my reputation on here is pretty bitchy. Like
it's like it kind of sucks because I feel like
now I'm always trying to defend myself because people always
like he doesn't want people in her house. I also
(02:47):
just came off of a little two night hosting of
my Eastern Michigan girlfriends that came into town, and I
piled in six people into my home and loved them
and loved them well and it was fun. So I
am actually nice.
Speaker 3 (03:00):
I don't think that you have you're the one with
like the reputation of being bitchy.
Speaker 2 (03:05):
You don't think people think I don't like they're always like, well,
we know, Chris, I'm not gonna have anybody over. It's like,
come on now, it's like you're one thing.
Speaker 4 (03:11):
It's like, you won't let people come over.
Speaker 2 (03:13):
But I do. Even you think I won't let people
come over.
Speaker 4 (03:17):
I have them to your house, yes, but you've never
been to my house. I don't have people over.
Speaker 2 (03:20):
So maybe that's the one that does like people over.
Speaker 4 (03:22):
Oh everyone knows I'm the bitch.
Speaker 3 (03:26):
Really, people really appreciate it, though, No, I don't know.
I would think from the outside looking in. Of all
three of us. I'm the bitch of the podcast.
Speaker 2 (03:35):
I don't think that at all. I think you can
I vote myself to bitch. No it's me. No, I
don't think so. I actually thoroughly enjoy it. I've told
you that below. And if it is, I'm telling you
I'm not going to look at the poll. How do
(03:56):
you not look? I don't look a lot. Pull even
get in the comments. When I said I hated football,
I was like, I'm not going in these comments. Come
to get real love.
Speaker 3 (04:04):
You really should have then gotten to my TikTok comments
about me and the.
Speaker 2 (04:09):
Same oh boy, and well it's resurrected.
Speaker 3 (04:13):
It's a fun day. And not even mind that when
being on social it's just when I talk about.
Speaker 2 (04:16):
People like family. So here's here's the thing. So I
think there are aspects. And again I've said many times
on here it'd be nice if Bananas and Papas were
able to spend more time or go to games and stuff.
And maybe I'm not saying the podcast was the reason
that they have booked, but I think it is maybe
(04:37):
recognizing like okay, maybe I don't know. I'm making this
back completely, not the Airbnb part, but you know, in
my mind, it's something that they're maybe recognizing too, to
spend to spend more time while the kids are at
such a beautiful age to that want them around, right. Yeah,
and so with your situation though when they're not clips. Yeah,
(04:58):
and there's a you know. But here's here's what I
love about it. So we are you spoke about? We
are in it today?
Speaker 1 (05:18):
Girls.
Speaker 2 (05:19):
I just you spoke about your mom listening, and she
texted a beautiful text being like I did care and
can we have a conversation. You've said you were waiting
on a text message to send. Have you sent said
text message? Yes?
Speaker 4 (05:32):
I sent a text message, And.
Speaker 5 (05:33):
Basically she's so sweet at the game, She's like, I
just like, I almost wanted to be like, thanks for listening.
Speaker 2 (05:39):
I love you, and I did. I was really close
to you, but I didn't also want her to feel
because it would have been She's so great. I love her,
I love your mom, I love your dad, I love
I've never met these people, but I'm just saying it's.
Speaker 5 (05:54):
I think it's beautiful how she responded to this. Yes, yes,
But what is interesting though, is it it is walking
a tight line, a tightrope. Oh yeah, with concause we
want to share our truth. Unfortunately, our truth does involve
people in the story.
Speaker 4 (06:14):
Yeah, it just gets so tricky.
Speaker 5 (06:16):
It does, because you want to share, yes, and then
it's it's and again it's that line of most likely
someone's going to be a part of that story with you.
Speaker 3 (06:27):
Yeah, I mean it can't just be us, No, I
mean it can, but very rarely it does involve other
I mean it usually involves other people.
Speaker 5 (06:34):
I know, which is funny though, because I've I've had
actually someone reach out to me and say, you know,
you've spoken about people on your podcast, and you know,
I really want to share something about my ex because
I know these things and it's so frustrating. You know,
she's listening all these things. And I said to her,
I said, what is your reasoning for wanting to speak
(06:57):
out about it?
Speaker 2 (06:58):
Is it to hurt him?
Speaker 5 (06:59):
Is it to to bash him publicly? I said, If
those are your reasons, then don't do it. Yes, it
is frustrating that they are doing X, Y and Z,
and they are doing this. I said, but if it's
to help other people then and to help you through
sharing your story, then to help other people, then yes,
I think it's okay. But if it's just to go
(07:20):
after someone on a public platform, that's not okay, right.
But I don't think we've ever sat here, and I mean, yes,
I've obviously talked about X's on here and there are
things I could say, right, but also to protect my kids,
and also, it's not what they do now in their
free time is not my business, right, right, right, or
(07:43):
what I know now about certain things, It's not my
job to come on here and expose what they're doing
behind closed doors. Now, if it affects my kids, I'll
handle it privately or if it'll you know what I'm saying.
But when it comes to things that I've gone through
in ex relationships, it's more just how I felt in
the situation, and they're they're the bystander of that. They're
(08:07):
the people that came that either hurt or how I
grew and healed with it.
Speaker 2 (08:12):
I think it's it's not.
Speaker 5 (08:15):
It's never our intention to hurt people that we might
talk about that might be family or an X.
Speaker 2 (08:21):
Right, It's just it is our truth of that story.
Speaker 3 (08:24):
Right, And I think it's important to see the intentionality
behind it. But I think that maybe sometimes that's probably
hard because if it's me and I'm listening to someone
talk about me on a podcast. I can understand where
that may be hard to see the intentionality behind it. Sure,
i'd be like, hey, why are you talking about me
on this podcast? But generally there's a reason why we
talk about things. You know, we like to talk things
(08:46):
out on here.
Speaker 2 (08:46):
We do.
Speaker 3 (08:47):
We like people's we like our opinions, you know, like
we don't really get to talk except for this time
during the week.
Speaker 2 (08:53):
It is very true.
Speaker 5 (08:54):
And also I always think the underlying truth of it
is that if it could help someone else feel none alone,
then I'm going to share it. Yeah, And that's always
my intention. I have not done that perfectly, but that
is where I try now to share from.
Speaker 3 (09:11):
Yeah, and I think it's always been your intention. I
just think sometimes it can come off. You know, we've
all had instances where it's come off like, man, was
where was the intention behind that?
Speaker 2 (09:20):
Right? It sounds like we were just bashing, right X y.
Speaker 4 (09:23):
Z because sometimes we can go, we can just get
go and.
Speaker 2 (09:26):
We just keep going and its recording.
Speaker 5 (09:30):
But you know what's so interesting though, is speaking of
the friend that AB had that you asked about, I
had another friend a good friend.
Speaker 2 (09:38):
Again, we don't. We're not as close and I'm not
even going to give her a shout out here. Shane Grimes.
Speaker 5 (09:43):
She sent me the longest voice memo just being like,
I am so sorry.
Speaker 2 (09:49):
She's like, she's like, if this is about me? Because
she's like, I totally forgot to respond. She's like, because
I invited her to the premiere.
Speaker 5 (09:57):
I invited her and she said I'm not sure, and
I was like, no worries, girl, just let me know
closer time.
Speaker 2 (10:01):
Well, she didn't listen. I get it. We're busy. It's funny,
you know what I mean.
Speaker 5 (10:05):
But she's like, if this She's like, I'm spiraling. She's like,
if this is about me, I'm so sorry I didn't.
I like, I know that I didn't confirm one hundred
percent because this other person confirmed a hundred percent saying yes,
and then dis didn't show for sure. It's different and
and I mean I didn't even listen to all. I
just read the transcript of it because it was long.
She's like, oh my gosh, this isn't about me. That
I feel even stupider, and she's like, I love you,
(10:27):
and I just she's like, and I hate that we
haven't hung out recently and blah blah, blah, blah blah.
And I just responded back. I'm like, girl, I love
you so much that you even you know, thought to
think that it was you. But also the fact that
the matter is that you reached out you didn't have to.
Speaker 2 (10:45):
Yeah, that was it wasn't about you. I love you,
I would have loved for you. But I also know
you're busy and it's all good, Like it's genuinely all good.
Speaker 3 (10:52):
Yeah, speaking of that, that is so funny. I had
a situation, you know, I'm such an overthinker. Just made
me think of this. And a couple of weeks ago
this happened to me, you know how, like when people
like will repost things. I mean, come on, we all
have our moments where we're like, oh my god, is
that about me? And so I had this moment with
a friend and oh really yes, and she had posted
(11:13):
something and I was like, oh my gosh. I mean
my brain just could not shut off. I was like,
this has to be about me, you know, I mean,
it just has to be. We just had this situation.
So I send her this long message to do the thing.
I was like, Okay, I felt really stupid. But I
feel like this is about me. I'm such an overthinker.
Ball it ended up she said it wasn't about me.
Hopefully it wasn't really about me. But isn't that the worst?
Speaker 2 (11:34):
Feet do you do that? I mean I have, Oh,
I haven't recently, but I mean, I I'm just trying
to think. I mean, it's been it's been a while
since I have. But yes, if it was something, if
something had just happened, to talk to her, maybe about
her on here, right, Yeah I saw something.
Speaker 5 (11:53):
That's when I would overthink, right right, but no, I
mean KB she also she had took a qu little
break to deal with a kid thing. So I'll say
this right now. But you know, and I would say
to her two if she was here in this moment.
But you know, she posts a lot of things. Yeah,
could easily, but I don't. I know hers don't, Yeah,
(12:13):
hers don't, I think.
Speaker 3 (12:14):
I mean, if you post them a lot, or don't
like Kristin posts them a lot. Yeah, Like it's so
I couldn't spend my time over thinking if I had
done something, but this person doesn't yet and something it
just happened.
Speaker 2 (12:26):
So I was like, well, if something it just happened totally.
Speaker 4 (12:28):
Yeah, then I would do you say something? Would you
say something?
Speaker 2 (12:32):
I would?
Speaker 5 (12:32):
Yeah, Like if I was in Shane's position, I have
one hundred percent would have done the exact same thing. Yeah,
I've been like, oh my gosh, I'm so sorry.
Speaker 4 (12:39):
Yeah, I think that's so sweet.
Speaker 5 (12:41):
I appreciated that. Yeah, I thought, you know, I'm just
like I miss you little saying.
Speaker 2 (12:44):
You know, it's hard.
Speaker 5 (12:45):
It's like we're all in this busy season, and but
it was, it was very it was very sweet.
Speaker 4 (12:49):
Yeah that is sweet.
Speaker 2 (12:51):
What else is going on?
Speaker 4 (12:52):
Oh, you know what, I'm in a funk. Man. I'm
just gonna be honest.
Speaker 3 (12:56):
I really really am I was supposed to do Okay, so.
Speaker 5 (12:59):
You know, I'm like a great conversation because you weren't
here for romans be day, but there's a conversation we had.
Speaker 2 (13:05):
Yeah that speaks to this, So go ahead, okay.
Speaker 3 (13:08):
I just I don't know if it's the time of year,
I don't know, if it's like I'm just exhausted.
Speaker 4 (13:14):
I don't know what it is.
Speaker 3 (13:15):
But my motivation, first of all, is very low and
it's not like work wise, like I think it's because
work slowing down. It's causing my motivation to just be
like plummet, right, And I get like this, and then
I get like, oh my gosh, the holidays are coming up.
If I don't do anything social, then people aren't going
to invite me, and then I'm not going to have
anything to do, and then I'm really going to be depressed.
This happens to me like every year. I feel like,
(13:37):
but I was supposed to. I was like, I'm gonna
be so good. And I had these sweet friends invite
me to go to Christmas Village with a group of
bootball somewhere in Nashville. It's like where you go and
just like all these vendors are set up and you
like shop.
Speaker 2 (13:49):
And stuff like the Dickens Franklin thing kind of.
Speaker 3 (13:53):
But it's like, I think it's just like more just
like inside and just shopping.
Speaker 2 (13:57):
Got it.
Speaker 3 (13:58):
And at first, and even when she invited me, she
was like, I know this really isn't your thing, but
I want you to know that you're invited. And I'm
like that is so sweet, right, And I was like
someone knows you're lovely, Yes, yes, absolutely, And I was
like this is so sweet.
Speaker 4 (14:12):
And I was like I would.
Speaker 3 (14:13):
Actually love to go, so then, of course, and then
in that moment, I would love to go, you know.
And so then it like gets closer to time, and
all this stuff's coming up this weekend and I'm feeling
not motivated, I'm feeling tired, and I'm like, but I'm
gonna do it.
Speaker 4 (14:26):
I'm gonna be social.
Speaker 3 (14:27):
I don't know any of these people besides the two
people that invited me, Like, I don't even know who's
going on the text Shane, I got nobody's numbers, you know,
and so that gives me major, yeah, major anxiety as
it is. So then I'm like, all right, it's fine,
I'm gonna do this. I'm gonna have a little drink
before I go, you know. And then Ramsey that morning
is like, you're taking me to softball lessons, right, because
(14:49):
you said that's our thing. We're going to go on
Thursdays to softball lessons. And I was like, oh, baby,
I have And so here goes Ramsey. I love her,
God bless her, but she can make me feel like
the worst pair sometimes.
Speaker 2 (15:01):
So then she I think it's the age too, is it? Well?
Speaker 5 (15:03):
Because I left trick or Treating early because I wanted
to obviously bring Roman back to bathe them, and she's like,
you're lading me. I'm like, you didn't care about last year,
you were off and now all of a sudden, I'm
so confused. And I just did you know the last
hour and there's five other moms here that.
Speaker 3 (15:20):
Yeah, you know, we're all that makes me feel better, yeah,
because I'm just like, well, I already don't want to go,
but I'm like trying to be good, you know, and
then now you're making me feel like crap. So I
was just like, so I sat on it for hours,
and then I was just like and so I just
sent a message and I was like, I can't do it.
Speaker 4 (15:38):
I'm just gonna be honest, like I need to go
out doing it.
Speaker 2 (15:40):
No.
Speaker 3 (15:41):
Oh not in the least. I'm I'm thankful that I
ended up going with Ramsey. I'm thankful that I made
that choice. I mean, if I would have done nothing,
then yes, if I was just sitting at home, I'd
be like, man, I should have gone, you know. But
I mean she came home, we sat in bed and
we colored for a couple hours. We went we had dinner,
(16:02):
and then we went to her lessons so I'm glad
that I gave her that time, but also I don't know.
Speaker 2 (16:10):
It's kind of twofold.
Speaker 3 (16:11):
It's like mix, like I want to be social during
this time, I want to be included in Christmas stuff,
but at the same time, I've got no motivation to
do anything, and I just I need to get out
of this bunk. Honestly, That's kind of where I'm at.
Speaker 5 (16:23):
Well, what I've been recently told is that.
Speaker 2 (16:27):
So okay.
Speaker 5 (16:27):
So I texted Nate are our doctor, dude, and I said,
something is up with me, and I don't know what
it is. I said, I'm depressed. I'm tired. I was like,
it is twelve and I'm barely I'm like almost falling
asleep driving to my hairplace. I was like, I feel off,
I said, I went to bed last night at eight thirty.
(16:47):
I just I'm like, I'm and then again I look
at it the side the same thing as you. I
get depressed because I'm like, oh, I don't know when
my next thing is? What am I doing in the slowdown?
I need that motivation. But also this is usually around
the time that I'm excited to slow down.
Speaker 4 (17:02):
Right right.
Speaker 5 (17:03):
So he had texted me and he said, he just
said a big video about how the depression of daylight
savings really messes people up and it takes a minute
for your system to get acclimated to it.
Speaker 2 (17:18):
That makes sense, Yeah, I know. I was like wow.
Speaker 5 (17:20):
But also I was doing a gut cleanse too, and
I just had an eboot treatment and stems out cheese.
So he's like, your body's when you detox, you also
can get depressed. So I said, okay, well just but
he did mention the daylights. But it's funny. As I
was talking to another girlfriend and then I talked to
Pam and Kristen last night and they were saying the
same thing. They're just like they're so tired, so tired,
motivated and just in a funk. And I said, oh, daylights.
Speaker 4 (17:43):
Yeah, say maybe that's it.
Speaker 2 (17:44):
Look into it, you guys, because apparently that's what is.
Speaker 4 (17:47):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (17:47):
Like I knew about like seasonal depression, which doesn't usually
hit me. I'm usually good once that, And I think
another part of this, this is funny. We actually talked
about this for a second the other day and I
thought about this later and we didn't talk about it long.
I get I'm not good at like decorating for Christmas
and stuff like I don't think I'm gifted at that,
like I want to be. I want it to be beautiful.
(18:08):
Well then I see everyone start posting and it gets
earlier and earlier every year. Well then it starts to
get to me because then I have that pressure of like, well,
I need to decorate and I need it to look
like that, and like why is everybody so much in
the spirit already, like I'm buying presents, but like, ah,
you know, so just like it's just where my brain
has been lately.
Speaker 2 (18:27):
At the pace you want to go at, friend.
Speaker 4 (18:28):
I know, I just wish I was. I need to
hire someone.
Speaker 5 (18:30):
Fine, start of business, let's start a girlfriend. I just
PLoP it in places. But it looks good. I hear
you though, girl, But let's look into that seasonal depression.
Also taking a talk to your doctor. But Saffron is
a supplement that my doctor recommended to take in the morning.
Speaker 2 (18:46):
It's just helps with mood enhances.
Speaker 5 (18:48):
I just stabilized, so so I'll do it.
Speaker 2 (18:51):
I know, I went straight down there. I was like, Saffron,
let's do this.
Speaker 5 (18:54):
Oh, so Seinfeld's moment, I was going to Dix because
I am surprising Jace almost just uh was careful with
(19:19):
my words, but I'm like, he can't listen.
Speaker 2 (19:21):
But now we're just careful. Everybody's listening. I'm surprising him
with a basketball, like they're the guy's pouring the concrete
and he's there going away. So when he comes home,
I'm going to put a big bow on the basketball
hoop outside. We need to do this if I need
to know how your experience goes. Yeah, on the list.
Speaker 5 (19:38):
So I go to Dick's and obviously the handicapped parking
spots one hundred percent up in front. But what pisses
me off is and then they do they do this
at Whole Foods.
Speaker 2 (19:50):
They do this I believe.
Speaker 5 (19:51):
At Walmart now because we were just there as well,
and at Dicks, but more so at the the Whole Foods.
Speaker 2 (19:58):
But it's the or pick up. Have the next three
to four spots, and I'm like, listen, if you're coming
to go get your grocery, they put the parking spots
in the back, like you're already lazy to go pick
up your groceries. You don't need to park close. You
need to park close. Let us part close because we're
hauling the groceries back, So I'm sorry. The pre the
(20:21):
online pick up things in those the next few lanes,
they pissed me off, so I parked in it. Revel,
she did it. I have another one for you.
Speaker 3 (20:32):
Well, hold on, I have I have a Devil's advocate
for this. It's for the workers that have to go back.
And can you imagine if you were the worker, Okay,
they had to go, then understand that point of view.
Speaker 2 (20:45):
The worker that gets paid to walk, I know.
Speaker 4 (20:47):
But if you have to go back and forth and
get them the whole.
Speaker 2 (20:49):
Time, like I understand that, then yeah, because you have
shoppers that are trying to come in and spend their money.
Speaker 4 (20:55):
And do the work, I get that point of view.
Speaker 3 (20:58):
I'm just saying, God, I have seen these workers go
like back and forth.
Speaker 4 (21:03):
I have when it gets really busy, especially.
Speaker 2 (21:05):
Like that makes sense, but when it's a target has
a side entrance, which I think is brilliant. One of
our targets here do that. They have this like other
entrance where they do the customer pick up, and those
spots are close to the building, but they're far away
and that's doing it.
Speaker 3 (21:19):
And just so we know, I'm so lazy that I'm
not even driving up to do it. I'm getting it
delivered to myself. So at that point, I'm not even
taking up the spot. Okay, Okay, so.
Speaker 2 (21:27):
You're actually not in this conversation about that. Minds you though.
When we were at DICKX, the whole parking lot was
completely open, but it did make me no smart.
Speaker 4 (21:35):
I noticed it and thought about it too.
Speaker 2 (21:37):
There's something else we're doing here in Nashville that I'm
really upset about. Okay, we have VIP parking, now what,
Oh I know at the Green Hills Mall and at
Galeria now, oh, what we have vip par I've done it.
I have done it.
Speaker 4 (21:51):
I've done it too.
Speaker 2 (21:52):
But I'm like, this isn't fair. Part of the retail
experience is getting that spot and going, oh, we're gonna
have a good deal today. Part of it is pulling
up and seeing somebody that is just wrapped up their
shopping and putting your blinker on and just knowing you're
setting the tone for your trip and now they're all
empty and just being waited.
Speaker 4 (22:11):
Waited to pay for that is frustrating.
Speaker 2 (22:13):
That's it's crazy. What are we doing to the park
linding ways? The rules of the parking lot have always
been what they will be. It is up to God
and karma if you get the close spot that has nothing.
This is not up to you to delegates more than ten,
is it.
Speaker 4 (22:31):
I'm that's ridiculous. I can't believe I did that.
Speaker 2 (22:34):
And then while you're shopping and get an alert because
we all paid for it, that says, hey, yeah, do
you want to pay more running through the store to
hurry up your thing? And then I've got friends who
maybe like you don't even pay it and just park
their anyway, and they're like, you know, forget it, I
don't care, And I'm does that work so far? They
don't have tickets or anything, And I'm like, it would
be my luck that if I didn't pay.
Speaker 4 (22:55):
I don't think we should do that, And that's that's
not advice.
Speaker 2 (22:58):
I know, Well, you would manage your cat. What's on
your thinking cat?
Speaker 4 (23:01):
No, I'm yeah, I mean, hey, I'm a valet person
throwing through amen.
Speaker 2 (23:04):
The easiest, the better. But I just also was like,
that's not how this works.
Speaker 3 (23:08):
We all know, I know, And there's so many of them,
so many Yeah, I agree.
Speaker 2 (23:12):
I make it like one parking lot where we all
just decide, you know, this is your VIP parking. Oh
you're supposed to like have to wait and part of
like if you ever listen to the secret manifesting your
parking spot, like that's all part of the exercise and
all they're just taking it away. Anyways, we just really
went with that. Sorry, I'll just never forget. I know
you really to thank you for taking my fires me up.
(23:33):
I know, and it's actually really smart. You're right. I
mean I still do that thing whenever we do get
it a close up parking spot, I still do it.
My mom said, like, looks like we're going to get
a good deal today, you know, because we got a
good spot. No, I didn't know that was the thing.
Speaker 4 (23:48):
That's cute.
Speaker 2 (23:49):
It is cute. It sets the tone for your shopping trip. Yeah,
got it. It's made a good front spot. Then that
means you're going to get a good deal. Okay, you're
destined to have a bogo day.
Speaker 5 (24:00):
One of the stories, Let's be a Midwestern Things see
Britney snowtoks rewiring her brain after years of having so
much disdain for my body. Britney Snow's opening up up
about her overcoming her body image struggles. The actress thirty
nine at are issues with body image began an early age,
recalling moments where she would hoard women's fitness magazines in
(24:20):
her teenage years. She couldn't even be naked around myself.
She said, I had so much disdain for my body,
and I couldn't see myself as a functional, beautiful being.
I only saw the things that were wrong with me.
That led to the act that led the actress struggling
with inarexia, exercise, bolimia, depression, and self harm. She said
she had to rewire her brain and learn to trust
(24:43):
herself again. She said, I think rewiring my brain where
I could count on myself and I could trust myself,
I could be in a space and feel like I
wasn't going to do something harmful to myself was the
best thing that ever could have happened to my recovery.
So she also said that she had a couple stints
and an inpatient rehab center, but it was outpatient program
where she committed two for a year that saved her life. Listen,
(25:07):
I am the hugest advocate for rewiring your brain. I mean,
I think that's what EMDR was so helpful for me
with a lot of my anxiety. But I will just
say the on the body side of things, I mean,
I'll never forget it's we're all in the same age.
(25:28):
We're all i mean, we're two years older than Brittany.
But reading those magazines. I used to read those magazines
like the Glamours and the Women's Health how to lose
five pounds, and I mean there was just and it's
such a young age in my twenties, I'm trying to
figure out how to how to lose this weight. And
you know, again growing up with Britney Spears and all
(25:49):
those when talking about body and weight, it's just it's wild.
Speaker 2 (25:54):
It's sad. I was going to say it has to
be our generation, yep, because I still do this. I mean,
I'm just gonna be honest, like there's days where I'm going,
oughf only this, if only you know, and I'm but
I have this like healthy, wonderful body that's capable, and
that's a blessing in itself. And I try to but
it is so ingrained in me. You know, like there's
(26:17):
even fitness programs that our friends are doing where it's
like count the macros and do this, and do that,
and I'm like, I can't do that be slippery slope
for me because I can get compulsive about that very quickly. Yeah,
and that's just not I need to exercise with with
my ABS being like a fun perk. It's mostly for
like anxiety and like my mood and I can't hyper
(26:37):
focus or I can go on slippery slopes. It's not
like way better now than I've ever been, way way better.
But I I mean I was boleemic. I mean I
means anybody else had a needing disorder.
Speaker 5 (26:49):
No, I when I was in middle school, I was
a figure skater.
Speaker 2 (26:57):
And I don't don't how do I say this?
Speaker 5 (27:04):
Like I had written this letter and I had to
go to the counselors like all the girls. So the
girls that were here, like some of the girls they
I had given this letter to Lisa, Oh, Lisa, I
know she took it to the counselor sweet mol Yeah.
But looking back in that moment, I mean I remember
coming home and shoving because I was saying I was
like start for myself. It was during the time like
the early start of my parents' divorce. And so that
(27:28):
was eighth grade, and well I got home and I'm
like shoving donuts to like prove to my mom like
that I didn't have. I just I wanted attention truly
in that moment. So I can't say that was a
needing disorder, but that was an attention piece. But when
I was with my acts, I had a compulsion with
the scale because that was all that I could.
Speaker 2 (27:48):
Control in that moment. It was always a control thing
for me. Yeah yeah, so that couldn't control his affairs,
but I could control the number on the scale. And
I also think that you put yourself in media, are acting,
you know, like all of that. That's like a whole
thing too. That's a crazy other people, a million other
people then are critiquing your body, not just you. But
but I've never been I would never say I was
(28:10):
had an eating disorder. Yeah, I was really in it.
And one of my very best friends also had. She
was anarexic, and I remember sitting down with her and
saying like, you know, like I'm really scared for you,
Like it got really bad, Kat, what we're gonna say.
Speaker 3 (28:25):
I just wonder in these moments, like yes, we had
the magazines you know then, but like truly, what was
the difference, what was the difference in you said that
you had an eating disorder at some point, and you
looking at the magazine and me look at looking at
the magazine. What like I'm thinking about my daughters. Like
what causes some a child, a young person to look
(28:48):
at that and think that they have to change and
they're not happy with themselves versus someone else.
Speaker 2 (28:52):
You know what I mean.
Speaker 3 (28:53):
Like, it can't just just be the magazines, because you
know what I mean, Or it can't just be social
media because we want to blame you know, I want
to blame so much on social media now, And we
didn't have social media right exactly, so then it was magazines.
Speaker 5 (29:05):
Yeah, and even now, I mean Julie she doesn't have
social media. But this is like a month or so ago.
She said something about she wants to be thin. I'm like, honey,
you are thin, like what you you have a beautiful.
Speaker 2 (29:15):
Body, you know.
Speaker 5 (29:16):
Yeah, But it was because she said she said she
was fat. I said to honey, I was like, who
said that? Because I'm like, that is so. But she
was wearing the wrong size clothes clothes, so because she said, well,
nothing fits me at daddy's so I had to like
call my ax and be like, hey, we got to
get the right cause she's now getting a body complex
right that she can't send their case.
Speaker 2 (29:37):
You know.
Speaker 5 (29:37):
And so he was like, oh my god, I didn't
even like you know, so we like, but how quick
that can just happen like that?
Speaker 4 (29:43):
That's that's so scary. Yeah, like what how do you
avoid that?
Speaker 2 (29:47):
Is?
Speaker 4 (29:48):
I guess where I'm going with that, Like how do
you Well.
Speaker 2 (29:50):
I think it's modeled to us too by parents, like
just like a satisfaction with our bodies and like a
healthy appreciation doing the shot. Yeah, you said you've had
conversations with.
Speaker 3 (30:04):
Yeah, I'd agree with that because I have seen people
close to me and how the parents talk and then
how the kids start to and so to be very
careful of that. So yes, i'd agree with that. And
that's what scares me about the you know, about the shot.
And I try to make sure that even if I'm
not very hungry, like I'm still eating in front of them,
you know, and stuff like that, even though I do
(30:24):
eat plenty. You know, it's not that I don't now
at all, but I don't know that just it just
really scares me being in you know, in cheer that
Emmy is in you know, all of that just really
scares me. And it's like, how, I mean, that is
so sad to hear from Brittany that she, I mean
had to rewire her brain.
Speaker 2 (30:43):
I still but I feel like.
Speaker 5 (30:45):
We all kind of in those that age and like
I had to rewire my brain for the looking at
the scale. I mean there's times when where I guy said,
I still I have that human health and I look
at it now for my body fat percentage in the
visceral fat, which I think girl important for overall health.
But there are still times when I look at the
number and it was like, well, what's the pound heavier
(31:05):
and having to retrain. No, don't go depressed, because that's
right where most women will go if they don't see
the number they want on the scale.
Speaker 2 (31:14):
Yeah, there is this, Like there was a study that
came out though when we were younger, Like I mean,
this isn't this is before social media for sure. That
was by the time we had reached like eighteen, we
had seen over this many ads. Remember it was commercial,
so we have social media, but we had commercials.
Speaker 4 (31:29):
It was the same thing, kind of like indoctrinating our BRAINSPI.
Speaker 5 (31:32):
It just kind of lectures Jenny Kragish loser.
Speaker 2 (31:35):
You know, true. Yeah, so we were kind of always
inundated with like magazines showed someone like calling them fat,
and you know, the blog, the vlog or the the
pres Hiltons of the world, you know what I mean
were we had shows the Biggest Loser and yeah, yeah,
people's way.
Speaker 5 (31:55):
So it's always been there. Women in general, I feel
like they don't touch the body. Women's bodies now from
what I.
Speaker 4 (32:02):
Yeah, definitely got that I've gotten better.
Speaker 3 (32:04):
It's almost like it almost feels like, you know, now
it's kind of changed in a sense that they want
more shape, yeah, to bodies, you know, and stuff like that.
But then as they get older, like do they really
you know, I don't know. It's it's it's hard to say,
but that that stuff scares me.
Speaker 2 (32:19):
I will say.
Speaker 5 (32:20):
What's sad too, is the most you know, people will
anytime I've ever seen anything negative about my body or
something is always from another woman. And that's the part
that always makes me sad too, because it's like, can
we just not comment on other people's bodies?
Speaker 2 (32:35):
Ye ever? Yeah, wild other women's bodies please? Yeah? Or kids?
Speaker 5 (32:42):
Oh well, I think there's something too. I had a
friend and I want to say it was like more
like acquaintance, but her mom was super super like working out,
I mean crazy amounts, right, and eating.
Speaker 2 (32:55):
You can't have that.
Speaker 5 (32:56):
You can so so strict on so many things that
to this day in her mid thirties, she is so paranoid,
so so overly where it's like I got it's like
I gotta work out.
Speaker 2 (33:10):
I catte that where it's just like it's okay, like
you're good you you don't have to obsess. But she
took on her mom's obsession of image. And that's where
I'm like, I've always seen that, and I thought to myself,
not trying to judge, but going I don't want my daughter.
I guess that's why I'm like everything in moderation, and
(33:31):
even though doctor Amon says, don't do everything in moderation,
but I do think as a child, I'm not I
don't want to be that parent that's like you can
never have that.
Speaker 3 (33:39):
I've seen that backfire way too many times. And in
the opposite way, they get away because their parents and
they're hoarding. That's right, Andy like restrictiveness, I do not.
I don't know what doctor Aymond says about that, but
I absolutely don't know.
Speaker 2 (33:51):
No, he's not saying kids.
Speaker 5 (33:53):
I don't know what he says about kid, but he's
saying when it comes to us, like don't say you
drink in moderation, moderation, you're give yourself excuse and that
she don't do that. That's not good for you. But
for you know, kids, it's do I let them have
dessert every night? No, but you know some nights yes,
because I don't want them to not have that. I
(34:13):
don't want them to feel that. And then also I'm
not getting them on treadmills like I know some kids
the age of Julie, they're like working them out.
Speaker 2 (34:22):
Oh wow, it's not good for their bones. But again
I don't want to judge.
Speaker 5 (34:26):
I just also have seen but this is where things
can maybe start with body image. I think it's important
for kids. Like we go for walks. We love family walks. Yeah,
it's one of our favorite times. It's getting and the kids.
The kids ask for it now after dinner, like can
we go for a family walk? I mean we just
did it. It was at six fifteen a night dark
out hold bundled up.
Speaker 2 (34:47):
They're like, let's go for a walk. It's good for
our heart health.
Speaker 1 (34:49):
You know.
Speaker 2 (34:50):
The kid's just like, yes, let's do it. Yeah, so movement.
But I'm so glad And again, I'm also just proud
of her for speaking out, speaking out of it, because
there's so many women that obviously and men too that
have felt this rewiring your brain so important always. I
don't know if she used EMDR, but that's one of
the ways that you can rewire your brain. Krischelle Stoule
(35:25):
says she's officially leaving Selling Sunset after nine seasons. She
will not be returning. It has yet to get picked
up for a ten season. I'm sure it will, but yeah,
she says, she's gotten to a place where I don't
need the show financially. I'm lucky to have other forms
of employment because it's no longer good for my mental health.
The reunion was so brutal, and that moment I realized
I will be done here going forward, she said, before
(35:47):
adding I wish everyone the best, but this isn't the
place for me.
Speaker 5 (35:50):
I felt like a little bit like it felt like
a little bit like a dogpile. Would you I think
about her fight with Emma and not liking your boyfriend.
They didn't watch the reunion.
Speaker 4 (35:57):
Yeah, I watched all of it.
Speaker 5 (35:58):
Yeah, I've watched the reunion and I'm almost finished with
the show.
Speaker 3 (36:02):
I like both of them, and it's I you know,
I hate that they're not friends anymore.
Speaker 4 (36:07):
I think that I was telling Jana this, I'm.
Speaker 5 (36:11):
Like, well, we should talk about this because this is
an interesting piece because you very much did not like
my access friend.
Speaker 3 (36:16):
Right and well, and I'm seeing that. I was like, man,
I can feel Chrishelle so much in these episodes when
she was first starting, like she didn't always handle it
the right way, but she just did not think he
was good for her. And he also she also did
not think that Emma really liked him, you know, like
that she really, you know, was it just was not
did not seem like a healthy relationship. And I don't know,
(36:39):
they touched on it a little bit, but she just
didn't like them, and she cared for her friend. What
I saw was Chrischelle caring for her friend. I've been there.
That's how I felt for Jana. It's such a hard
place to how do you tell them, like, you know,
she didn't always handle it the right way, So I
actually kind of will defend her on that. Now, there
were times where she seemed so snotty, snow so like
(37:01):
bratty about it because he was like not good enough
for you know, or whatever. Like the way she handled
some things. I'm like, Okay, you could have been nicer
about that. But but then she went to social media
and she did all that, and I think that's where
the line was really drawn, probably for Emma.
Speaker 5 (37:18):
I mean, I had said this to you, I said,
if you ever if we were going through something, I
couldn't imagine you ever going taking it to social media.
I understand where she was saying, we're we're a reality show,
but there's a difference between crossing the line of doing
different putting.
Speaker 2 (37:32):
I just could never you were my best friend.
Speaker 5 (37:35):
I could never imagine you saying something like that over
social media.
Speaker 2 (37:40):
Yeah well.
Speaker 5 (37:43):
No, maybe just save save it for the season, right,
you know, But it's you know, I think that's two
people hurt, Yeah, both of them. But why are you
bringing it to social media? Like that's not a good friend?
Speaker 4 (37:56):
No, you know what I'm saying. The intention got odd there.
Speaker 3 (38:01):
I will say, I think we missed a lot this season,
and I don't know if y'all have looked at some
things on social media about this. I think a lot
of things were cut out that Jason had some you know,
power over getting some things cut out. If you really go,
you haven't watched the whole see if you really go,
there's a lot of blow ups that seem to kind
of not make sense. There's been some been some things
(38:23):
that have been edited and that have been taken out
of it that it's kind of out of order in
some things.
Speaker 2 (38:28):
So there's a lot of things that are.
Speaker 3 (38:29):
Really weird about this season, not necessarily with Krishelle and Emma,
but with Chelsea and Brie by Mary. Chelsea and Mary,
there's something there that was cut out. They had a
huge blow up.
Speaker 2 (38:43):
Sondra kind of alluded to this yes in the interview
with her. She kind of just chatted like, you didn't
see that, you didn't see that.
Speaker 3 (38:49):
There's a lot I think that was cut out this Jason.
That just leaves a lot of questions and what really
happened and why is everyone so angry and why you know,
what is this blow up truly about? Because it seems
so small on the show, So there was just a
lot to it this season.
Speaker 5 (39:03):
Well, that's why I can never do a reality show
because the mental health aspect. So props to Koshelle for
just doing what's best for her.
Speaker 4 (39:11):
Absolutely, yeah, and it is so sad. I hate it
for Emma.
Speaker 2 (39:14):
Well, that's the thing. It's I understand. I mean, I
had one friend who very much, you know, we stopped
being friends because she did not like the person that
I was with many years ago. And that always hurt
me because I'm like, man, if you were my friend,
you wouldn't have treated me like that. And I always
think about you. You were this tough love as tough love
(39:34):
can get, and you started to create boundaries where you
wouldn't work on things with us, but you would never
would have stopped being my friend.
Speaker 4 (39:41):
No, that never ever crossed my mind. Ever.
Speaker 2 (39:44):
Now you do get, and I do.
Speaker 3 (39:46):
You can see Chrischelle get to that point a little
bit where she's like, Okay, I've got to have some
boundaries here, and she.
Speaker 2 (39:50):
Told us about that. That's so good and that's.
Speaker 3 (39:52):
Healthy, and that's where you just have to be honest
and just say all right, here's my boundary and I'm
here for you.
Speaker 2 (39:57):
Yeah, you know, and there's a way to do it
kind of sounded like she did say that, but maybe
something else was.
Speaker 3 (40:02):
Well, then she was social media, so maybe she had
all the best intentions, but then she ruined it in
that single moment by going to social media.
Speaker 2 (40:09):
And perhaps this her signing off is because she realized
she didn't like the person she was becoming.
Speaker 3 (40:14):
Yeah, and maybe and that I hope so too, because
that happens to the best of us. Chod, Like, if
you watch these episodes, I firmly believe she cares about
Emma like so, so, so so much and it was
just hard for her to sit back and watch it
and see her.
Speaker 2 (40:28):
Go through that so well.
Speaker 5 (40:30):
I I mean again, I love her, so it's it'll
be a different show without her.
Speaker 2 (40:35):
So it wind of that makes me moving out want
to watch.
Speaker 3 (40:39):
Well, I'm afraid we could end up we that they
could end up losing other people for the show too. Yeah,
I would be interested to see what happens.
Speaker 2 (40:46):
Or they'll cast somebody to take over that role.
Speaker 4 (40:49):
Yeah, yeah, we'll see.
Speaker 5 (40:51):
Hey, ladies, I'm thirty one years old and my husband
twenty nine and I have been together for six years,
married for almost one year. We have two kids, a
toddler and a four month old are sex life is
pretty much non existent. I'd say we probably have sex
about once every six months or so. Between being busy
with young kids and working full time, I'm just never
in the mood. But this isn't the only reason. My
(41:12):
husband often expresses frustration at the fact that I never
want to be intimate. He thinks sex is the only
form of intimacy, and recently I've tried to explain my reasoning.
Aside from my exhaustion, I explained to him that I'm
not like him in that I can't just be in
the mood to have sex whenever at any given moment.
I need to feel aroused and have that connection with
(41:33):
someone who makes me feel special. We never go on dates.
He doesn't do anything to make me feel special, and
he doesn't do anything to make me want to have
sex or get in the mood to have sex. His
response was, I understand, but I don't think I should
always have to earn sex. This response just angered me
because I'm like, well, okay, I don't feel like I
(41:53):
should have to have sex with you when I don't
feel like it because you want to. That comment was
kind of disgusting to me and made me feel like
an object. I don't feel like it's crazy or unreasonable
to want to have a connection with your partner in
order to have sex.
Speaker 2 (42:06):
Am I wrong?
Speaker 5 (42:08):
He also asked me for a blowjob every single day,
usually in exchange for something like doing all the night
feeds with our baby. I almost always say no, because again,
I'm not in the mood to give a blowjob every day,
and him straight up asking me for it on the
daily annoys me and makes me want to do it
even less. There once was a time when things were
new and exciting and I couldn't wait to rip our
(42:29):
clothes off. I miss feeling that way with somebody, where
you can't keep your hands off of each other. If
it's passionate and the mood to have sex is more frequent,
is it just married life with kids? Or has our
emotional and sexual connection died? Oh, this sweet listener, I know.
Speaker 2 (42:47):
Well, first and foremost. I love the fact that she
said something to him, Yeah, And I don't love his response.
I don't either. It seems really emotionally unintelligent to me,
so I'm struggling. Also, asking for a blowjob made me
like I'm instantly turned off. I found our heart be
so annoyed, like are you kid as a reward I
did the dishes or I did the night fee.
Speaker 3 (43:09):
I mean, I guess I could understand to an extent,
maybe him being like.
Speaker 4 (43:14):
Hey, I'll take this feed like, I get it.
Speaker 2 (43:16):
You got like, dude, that's not.
Speaker 4 (43:18):
The way to do it. It's less.
Speaker 2 (43:21):
I think you can relate in the aspect. Yeah. So
when it's something where when they're asking that makes you
not want.
Speaker 3 (43:29):
To absolutely, yeah, absolutely, I mean I can relate to
that big time. I mean I get it, and it's like,
but I see both sides to it. You know, it's
like they don't want to feel like they've earned it.
But then you're over here going yeah, but you don't
do X, Y and Z and you stop asking, like
I don't know why the asking gets so annoying.
Speaker 2 (43:49):
Well, it's also just not hot to me.
Speaker 4 (43:51):
Yeah, it's not.
Speaker 2 (43:52):
I'm going to say something probably really unpopular. Listeners going
to hate this, y'all are probably going to hate this too,
But here I go, Oh, I like it already. I
like the YEP. I don't like anything that your husband
has said or is doing. I'm just gonna like straight
up say that don't like that, but tonight, just do
it like before he says it. I know you're tired, yeah,
(44:16):
trust me, I get it. We all get it. Exhausted,
don't want to, but there is going to be I
hope that by you taking that initiative without him asking,
because just just do it before you can ask. Second,
you put that baby down. Just muster up, take a shot,
I don't know, like muster out any sort of because
(44:36):
he is your husband and you love him, right, you're not.
You're not leaving this to like you love him, do
do something that also gets him excited that with it
so that he doesn't have to ask, and this might
re itgne reignite the spark that and does something for
him too, and then maybe he'll ask you less. But
(44:58):
just try it and and say maybe the next day
be like, listen, I would probably do that more if
you asked less. And also next time, you know, I
want to be dated first, so like kiss me first,
and like those are the things. If you want more
of this, I need more of this and hopefully he
can give you a better a better response. But listen,
(45:21):
if you have to make yourself aroused during this time,
do the soft kisses like be the little vixen that's right,
and get yourself aroused and use him like a frickin toy.
It's called Samantha Jones mode. Just do it and just
see the difference in it, and then and then try
to communicate the next day or something. But maybe there'll
be a different version. It'll help reignite. I don't know.
(45:43):
I also just want to say you are not wrong
when you said am I wrong? Not wrong? You are
not wrong. This is obnoxious, immature boy behavior. We are
not in college. He's a father and a husband, and
also have sex with your husband. It's going to just
be better, like we run. That is one of the
things I wish I would have changed early on in
our marriage was like, now we have sex so often
(46:03):
it's just so great and there's no like it's almost
chicken her egg, and you get like, well if you
did this and I do that, and you do this,
like to your point, just remember like we get so
room mate, and I hate that feeling as couples. I'm
not saying like us at our house, but we have
done that too where we've gotten roommate modem and we
need to make out and remember that we're boyfriend, girlfriend,
(46:24):
and that there is you know, like plan the date
and and sometimes I have to plan the day.
Speaker 5 (46:30):
Yeah, and sometimes the man wants to feel wanted, wanted
and sexy. It is like the difference between men and
their head will spin in the best way and you
might see a different version and you actually will feel sexy,
like I feel sexy, like I miss feeling sexy, and
he thinks you're sexy.
Speaker 3 (46:48):
So do yeah now, And just to remember, the further
you get away from it, the easier it is to
not do it.
Speaker 2 (46:53):
And that's it gets.
Speaker 3 (46:54):
It kind of gets away from you, especially as a
woman who doesn't you know, need it, don't necessarily need it,
you don't have that much. Like the further you get
away from it, the easier it is to stay in
that place.
Speaker 4 (47:05):
And that's what I learned.
Speaker 3 (47:06):
So you just kind of, like like Jana said, just
do it because it'll just get further and further away.
Speaker 2 (47:10):
And give yourself grace. You have little kids, yeah, like
you have tiny kids. Have a fun night. Follow up
with us
Host
Jana Kramer
Popular Podcasts
Las Culturistas with Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang
Ding dong! Join your culture consultants, Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang, on an unforgettable journey into the beating heart of CULTURE. Alongside sizzling special guests, they GET INTO the hottest pop-culture moments of the day and the formative cultural experiences that turned them into Culturistas. Produced by the Big Money Players Network and iHeartRadio.
Crime Junkie
Does hearing about a true crime case always leave you scouring the internet for the truth behind the story? Dive into your next mystery with Crime Junkie. Every Monday, join your host Ashley Flowers as she unravels all the details of infamous and underreported true crime cases with her best friend Brit Prawat. From cold cases to missing persons and heroes in our community who seek justice, Crime Junkie is your destination for theories and stories you won’t hear anywhere else. Whether you're a seasoned true crime enthusiast or new to the genre, you'll find yourself on the edge of your seat awaiting a new episode every Monday. If you can never get enough true crime... Congratulations, you’ve found your people. Follow to join a community of Crime Junkies! Crime Junkie is presented by audiochuck Media Company.
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.