December 15, 2025 • 42 mins
There’s a difference in philosophies when it comes time for the cleaners to come to the house! Jana, Kathryn and Kristen open up about the frustration of trying to “pre-clean” and showing their families how to balance the workload.
Jana’s birthday was last week, and she shares why she was in a funk on the special day. She takes us into her past and memories that may feel like “wasted time”, but how will that change her experiences going forward?
Plus… should a 21 year old be in a relationship with a 65 year old?? How would the ladies handle their kids being in a major age gap romance?
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Wind Down with Janet Kramer and iHeartRadio podcast.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
Hi ladies, Hi, Hi, who wants to just hop right in?
Speaker 1 (00:12):
I get a whine about it, but we're gonna wait.
Speaker 2 (00:14):
So I think, can I get.
Speaker 1 (00:17):
Like a wine day? That seems depressing, But.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
You know it's so funny, is we were we were
on the phone chatting about Oh no, you texted the
whole group. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, well kat oh, I
just love you guys so much. We're really I think
we're all just really trying to navigate December.
Speaker 1 (00:33):
What happened? No, I just thought it was cute.
Speaker 2 (00:35):
Because I was coming on the chat to just like,
you know, to say what I wanted to say to
you guys. And then I was like, I'm gonna pin
all of it. So I moved that whole text over
to my notes and just pinned it. And then I
was like that, and then I started making marks next
to things that would be an overshare and then I
might regret later. You mean, like everything, Wait, was I on?
Speaker 1 (00:57):
Was I on the text? Yeah?
Speaker 2 (00:58):
So then you before or you even knew, you would
have no way of knowing I did that. You said
I have something I need to talk about, and then
you go never mind, I'm saving for the podcast. And
I was like, that's my girl. Okay, so you've got
something too, I do, and it's a wine it is okay,
let me think of a host Charlie Fast Wait, guys,
I say there's a suite. This is very shout out specific.
I won't say her last name. But I didn't realize
(01:20):
that people are binging us that have just found this podcast,
and it feels so cozy to me. So Lauren has
been dedicated to all of Wine Down and she is
almost caught up, I know. And she said, I don't
know what I'm gonna have to do when I have
to wait a week. Oh that's so sat and I
love that. So Lauren, I love you, and I think you're.
Speaker 1 (01:41):
That's the way I would do it, like TV. I
love it.
Speaker 2 (01:43):
Yeah, it's been ging it all. Yeah, I thought it
was really cute. So I get about why. I just randomly,
you know, our social girl. She'll send you know, follows
and whatever, and a lot of times it's very much
like three thousand follows, three thousand unfollows, you know. So
it's like there's no real true game. I couldn't know
those things right. Well, the funnest. I was like, I
(02:05):
wonder what it's been like in the last ninety days,
and it was like twelve thousand unfollows for forty thousand follows.
So I'm like, okay, you know, so it's but it's
one of those things where I we lose, so we
are getting, we are gaining, Yeah, listeners that can to
to you know, to hear us or whatever. And the
(02:26):
last week's episode, I can't you guys so much joy
because of all when they kept saying I'm a Catherine,
I'm a Christen, I'm a Jana in the group, and
like this has been like oh Catherine's face talking about
sexual stuff. And then even Alan so funny he walked
in he goes REPG. So it's like and it's I
(02:48):
always know, it's really funny to me. The ones that
he listens to, like when he sees the clip that
you know funny, Yeah, President, I actually a download, thanks babe.
He goes Yesterday's in the living your and he goes, well, baby,
you're just you're sharing a lot. I'm down, And I said,
just tumble, little baby. I can't tumble hush, You're going
(03:10):
to get.
Speaker 1 (03:10):
Any comfortableness in my face and my laugh and everything
about that. I just was dying laughing all over again.
Speaker 2 (03:18):
I had the mcdeale moment where you just opened up
that door and jump if you wanted out the thing.
Speaker 1 (03:23):
It's so funny about all of that. I was thinking.
I was like, it all makes me so uncomfortable that
like no one would ever know truly, you know what
I mean, Like no one would never know if I
wasn't gee you know what I mean? Because you are
makes me so uncomfortable. I would never talk about it.
And that's actually gave me a lot of satisfaction watching that,
because the truth is is I just don't like to
(03:44):
talk about it.
Speaker 2 (03:45):
Yeah, you're like a lady in the streets the sheep.
Speaker 1 (03:48):
I'm just saying. It just really made me laugh because
I was like, no one will ever know.
Speaker 2 (03:51):
Okay, anything you want to share.
Speaker 1 (03:53):
No wed from that conversation.
Speaker 2 (03:55):
But I do, you know, as the your ends, and
we'll have more of a you know, a the appreciation
piece with the podcast, but you know we do. It's
fun to make people laugh and then have the the
deep combos too, which we really cover, which we really
get to.
Speaker 1 (04:13):
It is definitely my favorite to be the I'm I'm
the Catherine, I'm the Jana. It's just so fun because
that's what's so great about us. We all have such
different personalities and.
Speaker 2 (04:23):
We hold our man that way, which I like, like
we can agree, we can also just disagree, which I like.
Speaker 1 (04:28):
I wonder what the roller coasters like binging it though, Oh, it's.
Speaker 2 (04:36):
Because I had another husband, like the urn, because that's
a train wreck. So spoilers spoiler alerts. It's not a
train wreck. What it was is a beautiful vulnerability. That
is the one thing I think you've taught me. I've
(04:57):
said it before, but you the way you own in
the past and your drive for love I think is
so admirable. And it just like it lets people also
feel those things and say those things out loud, so
you should not it was not a train wreck. Well,
I think what's intriguing? This is better co host than him.
But yes, I will say one thing. I will Yeah,
(05:19):
I will defend my ex husband in this. He was
really good with guests. He had really great guest questions.
I'm in the table, my comment, go ahead, Well go
for it.
Speaker 1 (05:28):
Oh now I'm curious.
Speaker 2 (05:29):
Oh, he's good with guests all over today we'll probably
got it. It's fine, but I will say like that
is where like he was a good interviewee.
Speaker 1 (05:39):
Sure, Yeah, I thought he was great on the podcast.
I truly did. Yeah, and this is coming from you
know I I truly thought he was great on it.
I think he was. He's good with people, he's good
at speaking, you know, all of those things. What was
hard it was knowing when y'all hated each other so much,
and not really hated each other, but you know, but
had been fighting or whatever, something had happened. Then y'all
have to get on that couch and it's just you know,
(06:02):
and people probably can't hear that as they're listening through,
as much as it's hard for us to.
Speaker 2 (06:06):
It is interesting though. And I had a very introspectful
moment because I obviously I had a birthday last week
or when this airs it'll be like two weeks or whatever.
But and I get really introspective for the right word, Yeah,
on my birthday, I get emotional pretty much every year
I have this, and I don't and I know I'm
(06:28):
not alone and that I have spoken to other people
that have felt that same emotion that they have on
their birthday. But I'm this type where and it doesn't
help too when it's like shut or fly will be
like here's your memories the last you know, and it's
so interesting, and I know this is just again something
that I was just it's not even a conversation. It's
more of just like a thought. But the birthdays past,
(06:51):
you know what I mean, because when you get older.
So now I'm forty two and I think about where
I was at thirty two, you know, or where I
was at twenty two, and it's just the roads that
we've taken some not the ways that I wish I
would have went down, you know, but it's just I
get in this. I sat in a bit of a
(07:12):
funk on my birthday. Not because I'm not happy where
I'm at. I'm very happy, but there is that sometimes
it feels like time was wasted and I suffer in
that where it makes me sad that like I know
how precious life and time is. That it's like God,
(07:33):
if I could I don't regret it, but if I
could get a redo again, even though if I could
end up kind of where I'm still at, I don't know.
It's like and I know that's kind of saying two things.
That's no. I I completely agree because there is a
piece of like I'm starting to hit it. I'll be
forty four soon, and I'm going, well, wait, there's all
these things like that I don't want to break up
(07:56):
with yet that I haven't tried yet, and I've done so.
But then I've done so many things. But then I
also have paused life for you know, a decade with
a husband before Preston, and you know, like a stay
at home mom part of life, and all of those
things are beautiful and fruitful in all their own ways,
(08:16):
but it also is like, well, shoot, can you start
over at forty four? Like can you go chase a
career that you always thought you'd have? Well, I hope so,
because I don't still have the career that I want
to have. Yeah, in this moment. I had it in
certain periods of my life, like in my twenties when
I was working on One Tree Hill. The forties are also
what I wanted, right, So it's like, I hope we
(08:37):
can still chase Yeah, the forties are also And I
don't know if y'all are feeling this, but it's a
really strange, like the people we admired and loved, like
even as celebrities are getting older or they're passing away
people that I thought were forever going to be that
age in my brain, you know. And then there's also
a part of me that watches, like our pairs get older.
(09:00):
You know. Preston's parents are ten years older than my mom,
and so they're getting older, and then you realize you're
getting older. But I don't feel like I'm in my forties,
So it's such a it's like a oh, whoa, whoa whoa,
Like I start to understand that the time slow down
feeling that people have. Have you guys watched that Ja
Kelly George Clooney movie that just came out, No, So
we watched it last night also as Adam sand lerne
(09:22):
but you know where we're like, oh, like he's you
can tell physically obviously that he's getting older, you know.
But that whole movie was about essentially like you know
that movie with matthe McConaughey, whereas the Christmas a Ghost
of a Christmas past or whatever, and it was almost
like that with his life, the j Kelly character, And
(09:43):
that also made me start thinking about how I was
feeling on my birthday was all the decisions that we
make and then where we're at and that's sixty year old,
you know. So it's like, Okay, we still have a
good chunk. I pray, you know, who knows that we
could something could happen today or tomorrow, Like we still
hopefully get that good chunk to to do now what
(10:04):
we know better today, but also we might have I
might never get back on the show that I want
to get back on or something so, but to then
still be grateful for those experiences and not be sad
to not be where I want to be. So I
think that's the piece too, where it's like even my husband,
like he was at the top of his career in
(10:25):
England coaching, he might not ever give that get the opportunity.
Instead of being sad, it's like holding space for like
how great was that to be a part of something
so great? But where I always go to is I'm like,
I'm not where I want to be. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (10:39):
I think it's also hard because that can be so
different in different things of your life, because like your
family could be exactly where you wanted it to be,
but then not be happy with where your career is
or vice versa, or you know whatever. So it's holding
space for both of those. Just because you can be
a little disappointed that something's not the way that you
wanted it to be doesn't mean you're unhappy. Does not
(10:59):
mean that you're not happy in other areas of your life.
I think that that's important to remember, sure, and shouldn't
be looked over.
Speaker 2 (11:05):
Yeah, it's just it's the people that when I think
of like the seven years that I just was like
grinded in that, and I'm like, could I, yes, I
could have shortened that time period and I put so
much just like immense amount of just like so many
birthdays quote unquote, and years were wasted like fighting for
(11:27):
something that like I was, I was never going to
battle through that. We were never going to get through that,
you know. And it's like thinking of, like the year
is wasted, knowing how precious each year is now, but
you also got a book, like you wouldn't be able
to write the way you write or speak the waste.
I think. I just get like really reflective. I am
emotionally reflective on my birthday and it happens every year.
(11:50):
I can't escape it. I just get emotional and like
nothing will be good enough on my birthday and that's it. Well,
it's okay to just know that, Yeah, I don't know.
I also wish for I know, we have a lot
of like really young people that listen, and I just
love them so much. But I really wish if I
could tell them and old like younger me something it
would be like to not worry and just really know
(12:14):
that you're living in some of the best days of
your life while they're happening. Because part of my I
don't even like the word regret, but for lack of
a better term, is just thinking like did I really
soak it up the way I so that like I
remember like even being on the radio and and like
loving it, but then wondering, Okay, could I go to
the station next, or could I do that? Or do
I want to be a news anchor? And then I
(12:34):
did road Rules and I was like, this is incredible,
but I was worried about what they thought of me
and how they would they want me to do another show.
And I don't feel like I like fully enjoyed everything
the way I wish I could have or should have
while I was in it. So maybe that is the
piece of wisdom to pass on to people that aren't
in their forties. It's hard, though, to do that, like
even today, Like even when I do a movie now
and like enjoy every moment because it's three weeks and
(12:56):
then you're gonna be out, you know, And it's still
hard when you're in that moment.
Speaker 1 (13:00):
Yeah, no matter how old you are, it happens to
me all the time. I'm like, why am I not
just enjoying this versus getting like upset about something or
you know whatever it is.
Speaker 2 (13:10):
Well, sorry for a reflective moment. I I love your
reflective moment. Here's to forty two Part two. That's why
I'm calling it. I like you part two. We're having
a part two.
Speaker 3 (13:19):
Baby, are we ready to whine about it?
Speaker 2 (13:35):
I think we all got something on our list.
Speaker 1 (13:37):
I'm just gonna do mine real quick, because we don't
know it does not have to be quick. Well, it's not.
We've probably talked about this before, but I'm just from
our text yes, because I was like, shit, I mean.
Speaker 2 (13:50):
Okay, hold on a second, let me just We're just
going to give you a little inside tea to our
dear angel Cha. I just it's the I knew it
was good because you don't typically use this kind of line.
Speaker 1 (14:00):
It's just funny because we had just talked about that.
Speaker 2 (14:03):
We're talking about doing getting together and then she said.
Catherine's like, well, I'm coming over, and I said, fantastic.
Speaker 1 (14:13):
You have to say where the all right?
Speaker 2 (14:17):
Basically I said December twenty third, wind down lunch after podcasting.
Kristin goes, yes, Catherine goes, love we still doing party?
She was we still doing party on the fifteenth, by
the way, I said, oh god, I don't know, ha ha,
but I'm ha ha. She goes, Okay, well I'm coming over,
so and then I said, fan fantastic. Kristin goes. That
made me laugh out loud. I said what we all
(14:38):
need right now. Catherine goes, you know what's actually hilarious. Actually,
I'll save it for the podcast. KB goes save it.
She goes, all day I have been pinning and then
trying not to let hormones determine my overshare. That was
our That is way better because that's just so us
and go.
Speaker 1 (14:55):
And the reason I say that is because we had
just had this conversation and I'm not going to say
who as talking about it, but someone we were just
having a conversation about the cleaner's coming. Okay, let's just
talk about it.
Speaker 2 (15:05):
I'll say it. Okay, this is me because I'll say
it right now.
Speaker 1 (15:09):
I wasn't sure.
Speaker 2 (15:10):
It's fine. I'll totally out myself. And this happened on
my birthday. I and that's I will never have the
maids come on my birthday again. I'm a psycho when
the maids come, I just am every other Tuesday. Because
the deal is is that everyone in my household things.
The maids put things away. They don't. We have to
put it away for them to clean, because if not,
(15:32):
they will lift up the thing and they'll wipe under
it and they'll put it down. So that is why
when everyone's like, why is mom a psycho on May Day? Well,
because I have to put everything away. We clean for
the cleaning people. This is Preston's biggest argument. And it's like,
well you're always so strossedtone like yes, because I need
to like this has to be put everything needs to
be put away. But and now they all know, I'll
(15:56):
just say that.
Speaker 1 (15:57):
They're all aware, do they know?
Speaker 2 (15:59):
Well we'll see next Tuesday.
Speaker 1 (16:00):
Okay, Well, so forward, I go out of town. Our
cleaners come every other Monday. It says on Monday, cleaners come.
It says on Sunday clean for cleaners. Okay, However, I,
in the way that I work, send a reminder text
Sunday morning that says, hey, make sure the house is
(16:21):
clean for cleaners tomorrow. I get there when the cleaners
are there, this house is a disaster.
Speaker 2 (16:27):
As they're cleaning, I already asked for what.
Speaker 1 (16:30):
He literally lost my mind. And I wasn't even still
on my period.
Speaker 2 (16:38):
I'm just say I was like seven days waiting for
mine late, so like I was already.
Speaker 1 (16:42):
Like already, but it wasn't even that. I didn't even
feel that rage. I felt like utter like disrespect, like sorry,
I love you, but like is what it is I
have never felt. So I was just like, and then.
Speaker 2 (16:55):
The you will say honey, I love you, because he's listening.
Speaker 1 (16:59):
If it's a clip, I do love you. And you're
great at a lot of things. It used to be
a great cleaner. I don't know what he used to
be cleaner than me. But I mean, so they're there,
they've already done the upstairs, have already skipped half the
shit because there's stuff everywhere.
Speaker 2 (17:12):
Because they won't. Yeah, because obviously that's not their job. No,
I have photos, y'all.
Speaker 1 (17:17):
I mean I literally because he literally responds to me,
I cleaned for hours, and I'm like, I'm not sure
what I'm not sure what happened, and I'm sure he did,
but I'm like, the so come to find out, which
this is a lesson for everyone in my home. People
were responsible, as they should for different spots. Right, Well,
Emmy's out of town, her rooms clean before we left.
(17:39):
Cayden puts Ramsey in charge of the second back half
of the bonus room, which couldn't be more obvious in ever.
But I'm like, so, now I have a sixteen year
old and a forty whatever four year old man blaming
the nine year old for not cleaning.
Speaker 2 (17:53):
Look at look, look, I just look after.
Speaker 1 (17:58):
How hard is it?
Speaker 2 (18:00):
I cannot tell you how validating it is. I was
made to feel like a true psycho for my psychonists.
Speaker 1 (18:06):
No, you guys clean, y'all.
Speaker 2 (18:08):
This is the most validating moment I've had in a
long time, because Preston, we you know, we lost Saint Christine,
and so I immediately said I'm going to get I
haven't had cleaning people in the years, they've come one
time before a party, like, but that's it. And so
I said, I'm going to treat yourself. Is that still
a thing? I thought, I'll bring them back and that
(18:30):
will just make me feel like good, you know, twice
a month.
Speaker 1 (18:33):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (18:34):
No one in my home understands cleaning for the cleaning people,
no one. And I also respect my cleaning people so
much and their time these people have, so that's what
other things to do. They have other homes that they've
committed to. They can't spend hours cleaning up.
Speaker 1 (18:49):
Yeah, like, you just disrespected the three cleaning ladies in
our house and me, I mean, granted, I was not
what did they say? I mean, you know, at first
Nick was like, oh I cleaned for hours, blah blah blah.
But then when I started sending photos, He's like, I understand,
that's my bad.
Speaker 2 (19:03):
I should have looked to make sure I'd admit that.
Speaker 1 (19:05):
Yes he did. And then Ramsey was responsible for that,
and I'm like, you are sick. You could you help
me out and just go and he was like, yeah,
my bad. And I when I went into his closet,
I'm like, when you clean your room the closets included,
which this is all three of my children, so just
just like all the dirty clothes and the I'm like,
bring it in the laundry. But this also goes too.
It was funny, and that's why I had to say,
this is really freaking hilarious. After we just had this conversation.
(19:27):
But then the conversation come up of you sprung it
on me. That was the conversation that was had this morning.
He goes, well, you kind of sprung it on me,
and I go, it's on the calendar, everybody, Well, I
don't look ahead. Well on Sunday it says clean for
the cleaners, like I don't know, and the text and
I will it is a Sunday morning.
Speaker 2 (19:43):
It is kind of frustrating because I've even made comments
so now on Monday, because I know every other Tuesday
the cleaning lady will come. So on Monday, I will
I will start putting things away and be like okay,
because I don't want to be a psycho. On Tuesday morning,
you know when the kid are out, because they come
at eight in the morning. Right when the kids are
I'm bustling them out of you know, to get to
(20:04):
the bus and stuff, busting them back to the door.
And so I try to start doing it Monday, putting
things away that are on the counters or in the
kids room, playrooms or whatever. And it's like, yeah, so
you're not crazy tomorrow, and I'm like, well, I would
like to not be if I could have a little help,
you know.
Speaker 1 (20:19):
And they'll start all ganging up on you.
Speaker 2 (20:21):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (20:21):
Yeah, and all the kids will start and it's like, no, no, no.
Instead of letting us get to that place, why don't
we all see it hear it and start helping.
Speaker 2 (20:29):
Yeah. The best part. He's like, well, I don't know
what what I'm supposed to do. He's like, because I
don't know where the sheets are. And I go, well,
this is a really fun fact, man. I go every
room as a basket and it's labeled sheets. So I said,
what happens is is I then take those sheets. He's like, well,
how do I know which one sheets?
Speaker 1 (20:46):
I go.
Speaker 2 (20:47):
They're all color coordinated, I said, which is great. So
it's like they're all the same color, all the same pillowcases.
I said, So you take those sheets and you just
plup them on their bed, you know. So I'm like,
that's I guess it just doesn't actually get any easier
than that.
Speaker 1 (21:01):
And that's the thing. And then I started thinking it
would have gotten done in the sense that the cleaners
would have come and it would have been clean ish,
but like, I want it better. I think that's my thing.
Like there are certain things where I'm like, it just
is what it is, and that's fine and it's no
big deal. But then there are certain things where I'm like, no,
I think it just needs to be better. A very
good example was also while I was gone, oh sorry.
Speaker 2 (21:24):
When KK is in these moods, it gave me life.
Speaker 1 (21:28):
I explained to him something that has always been the
case about when Ramsey goes to bed and when she
puts herself away, and the response was, you're just better
at this than I am. And I was like, I
think that's supposed to be a compliment, not what I
want to hear. It's not about being better. Just do it, Like,
just do I know what the thing is? Like I don't.
(21:50):
I don't I but I don't get it nothing. He
didn't respond, yeah, because I think he probably felt like
I wanted to fight, because sometimes I do, but truthfully,
I just want it to be done right.
Speaker 2 (22:01):
And I also just don't like, oh I'm deciding to
whether I'm saying this.
Speaker 1 (22:09):
I mean, I just attacked my husband for about twenty No, no, no,
it's not that.
Speaker 2 (22:12):
It's not to diminish so I'm gonna save. I'm just
gonna say I have worked my ass off my entire life.
I worked through college. I built a resume that was
so epic, you know, And and I decided, we as
a family, decided to table that so that I could
(22:33):
do I could steward well the gifts inside of our house.
And I everyone knows that I love and enjoy that responsibility.
And I also deserve the respect that I'm not made
like this isn't I'm not. I didn't do all that
so that I could throw away a string cheese wrapper
that it's literally above the garbage can because you couldn't
(22:54):
open the garbage can. Like that's not it's just not
fair to me. So it's like disrespectful. It's how I
always feel. It feels like you don't value me, and
that is the bigger feeling. And that's why I'm psycho.
Is not psycho, it's just going like are you kidding me?
Is this really? Like? No one else it goes wow.
You know, Like I remember doctor Phil said something decades ago.
(23:18):
I've always been an og doctor Philler, and this is
literally I was probably like in my twenties. He said,
if you wake up in the morning as a husband
and you say how can I make my wife's day better?
And the wife wakes up in the morning and says,
how can I make my husband's day better? You are
bound for greatness.
Speaker 1 (23:31):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (23:33):
All I want to do is just have people wake
up and go like I'm always thinking how I can
make their day better?
Speaker 1 (23:37):
Yeah, who's thinking about me?
Speaker 2 (23:40):
I know Preston brust is. I know he is. I
know he is, and it's in different ways, in different languages.
And but I have never been really an act of
service gal and maybe I'm just turning into one.
Speaker 1 (23:49):
Maybe it's changing.
Speaker 2 (23:50):
I think what I do appreciate Catherine, what you're saying though, too,
and I totally hear what you're saying as well, KB.
But with you asked him days ahead of time, put calendar.
I think that's the part where it's like I don't
know how else I could have. It's like I don't
feel seen, I feel heard, and that peace as a
woman it's like I've already said, it's not like you were.
(24:11):
You weren't making Nick read his mind, read your mind,
and that's the death that we have all done as women.
Read my mind for what I need to happen right now. Okay,
so my husband actually didn't know. He's like, well, the
maids back in Scotland, in England, they put everything away,
so that's I was like, okay, well, that's not how
it is here. That's how it's never been for the
last two years of you living here, which is why
(24:32):
you know so, but now you know, so maybe there'll
be something you know. But with you, it's like you
you he Nick knows this, you know, and you gave
him reminders. And that's the part as women where we
go to, I gave you reminders. Now you didn't even acknowledge.
Now I feel disrespected, I don't feel seen, I don't
(24:53):
feel heard, and now I'm frustrated. So it's kind of
frustrating that then they'll maybe get upset about a reaction. Yes,
because hello, we have then a right to be frustrated
that we have set it up so beautifully in this
lovely package for you.
Speaker 1 (25:08):
Yep. Yeah, and it's not like I usually don't. I mean,
I usually have them help me. But I guess the
reality is I do the majority of it, you know.
So then it's like, and that's fine.
Speaker 2 (25:17):
We like our we like to actually put things away
where they actually go.
Speaker 1 (25:21):
Right, But I just I want everyone to help me.
Speaker 2 (25:23):
I do.
Speaker 1 (25:23):
I want everyone to help me, and they did.
Speaker 2 (25:25):
Then it's not all on us. That's why I keep
telling them a little compound interest.
Speaker 1 (25:29):
I'm not even that picky, but maybe that's why I've
gotten it to this point too. You know, part of
me looks at it. I'm like, Okay, I do kind
of clean up after them, or I don't make them all.
I mean, I make them clean their rooms. I do
they do chores stuff like that. But like I'm like,
we're going to have to just like start over. I
don't know my kids are hold Like, I don't even
know at this point. No, But anyway, so I came
home to that and I literally cleaned while the cleaning
(25:49):
ladies were there when I was tired when I got home,
and I was just not very happy about it.
Speaker 2 (25:54):
Well, girl, that is an amazing wine. And I feel
validated in my because I was again made to feel
like just such an ungrateful Yeah, personally, and.
Speaker 1 (26:04):
I know we go a little crazy, but also like
just help.
Speaker 2 (26:07):
Yeah yeah, but we're not going together. We're not going
crazy for no reason. That's always my thing. I'm not
just flying off the handle being a psycho. Right, I
know this, And this is what I told Alan to
and you know, you know the kiddos, it's actually Mommy's
not upset that she's cleaning. It's how Mommy feels about
not being understood or seen in this moment. So it's
(26:28):
not about the cleaning. I don't mind cleaning. I love cleaning, right,
It's that I am feeling like it's all falling on
my shoulders, which then makes me feel disrespected, not seen. Yeah,
and not appreciating that.
Speaker 1 (26:39):
I don't do well with feeling like it's all on
my shoulders. Yeah, I definitely I acknowledge that. And some
women do some women actually enjoy that. I mean, I
don't know if they enjoy it, but I do have
friends that like choose for it more to be that way.
That's never been us, that's never been our relationship. We've
you know, that's just not how we work.
Speaker 2 (26:57):
So to start now, Wow, a New Year's resolution for
the family. Yeah, would you like to? I got ghosted
by my cleaning ladies, so I don't know.
Speaker 1 (27:09):
I had some valuable feedback.
Speaker 2 (27:12):
I don't know if we're going to be together. It
was a wild time. She used the microwave but didn't
clean it. Isn't that weird?
Speaker 1 (27:18):
I mean, I've had complaints about all of my complete
I almost texted you to ask.
Speaker 2 (27:22):
For yeah now, but you know, will they ever do
it that?
Speaker 1 (27:28):
You know?
Speaker 2 (27:28):
We are right? We're well. I just thought it was weird.
I'm like, a strange thing to use one's microwave, considering
you're probably only wants to use it. Creamer, what's your wine?
Speaker 1 (27:38):
You know what?
Speaker 2 (27:38):
It happened again on my birthday. But it wasn't It
didn't involve it didn't involve us, so my wine. It
was just it bothered me and I and I almost
wanted to say something to the person next to me,
which I didn't, but I wanted to. I have I
get really upset for so one, Like there was a
(28:01):
couple next to us at dinner that were clearly on
a date, husband and wife, probably been married. Let's just
say for a while, you know what I mean, Like
I'm sure they've been married for a while. But the
amount of times that the husband took his phone out no,
during the date. And it's not like he was like
and I was like, Okay, maybe he's a doctor, you
know what I mean, maybe this is maybe it is
(28:25):
so I knows the cheeks was like he's right there,
and so I'm just like a lean back. He's just
on Instagram. No, you know what I mean, he's not
a doctor. Like no, And but like literally the amount
of times. And what I did then was I looked
at the wife and the wife is just like, you know,
putting her head down, like looking away, but like it
(28:45):
made me sad, Like it makes me sad, and I
wanted to be like, dude, put your fucking phone down,
and like why you're on a date with your wife? Like,
I don't know, it really bothers me? Does that bother
you guys? No? I just imagine Alan having a whine
about it. It was like I took jan out for birthday
dinner and all she did was he at the table,
which is really bad to me. I'm really have a
(29:07):
love I actually just have a hate hate with the phone.
I know that the phone is an essential piece of
our business, specifically with my husband. It is he doesn't
have an office, he doesn't have a computer. This is
an hour and fifteen minutes so during a dinner. But
that's it. We just we're just be like, hey, sorry,
I want to check make sure that the sitter is good,
you know what I mean, Like I'll do that every
once in a while, just to make sure that baby's down. Yeah,
(29:29):
you know, but the just like scrolling in a date.
I don't cat.
Speaker 1 (29:33):
I know you Like, I mean, I'm kind of bad
about it, so I can't say a whole lot, but it.
Nick's not terrible at that. The kids can be, though,
And so I've started to notice that. I'm like, all right,
I'm talking to you and I and Emmy did point
out to me one time, she's like, you're not very
good at either. I was like, you, you are so right,
I'm not. I am trying to teach you so y'all
will be better at it. But like I need to
be good too. But I have really started if I'm
(29:55):
even if she's on it already, because a lot of
time she'll already be on it and I'll start talking. Yeah,
She's like, but I was already doing something, and I
was like, totally understand, So why don't you say, hey,
just give me one second, let me finish doing that,
and then put it down. So I'm trying to teach
them to do better, and I am trying when people
are talking to me to do better. But if we're
just like sitting there, I am bad at scrolling. Even
on a date, I try not to be Oh god,
(30:17):
it's been so long since we've even been on a date.
Speaker 2 (30:19):
I feel like, oh, when's the last date night you've had?
Speaker 1 (30:24):
A wedding? That was all we've definitely had.
Speaker 2 (30:27):
Oh well yeah, yeah, but one.
Speaker 1 (30:30):
Yeah, it's been a while.
Speaker 2 (30:31):
It's been a long time for us.
Speaker 1 (30:32):
I mean dinner, you know, like when the kids aren't home,
like we'll just run and get dinner. But it doesn't
feel like I can, you know. But I do try
to do better at it. But if like we're both
like not in a conversation, I think we'll kind of
naturally just pick it up sometimes and then just kind
of naturally put it down.
Speaker 2 (30:47):
Like I'm good for silence when it's at like if
we're in a date or whatever. Yeah, but if it's
like a prolonged silence, I start to go really heady,
and I'm like, do we not have anything to talk about?
Like you know that is so you I'm like, why
is what do we even talk about? Like is it
not interested in one? Like yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 1 (31:03):
I just think keep run out of things to talk about. See.
Speaker 2 (31:07):
That's where I'm like, That's how I feel sometimes, I
totally because we just talk five day when things talk,
when things happen, I think, yeah, see, and we're never
going to run out because we never see each other.
Speaker 1 (31:19):
Yeah maybe, And I mean truly, it's like a I
text in the moment when anything happens, So once we
get to the end of the day, it's like it's like.
Speaker 2 (31:27):
I love that you do that we already the kind of.
Speaker 1 (31:31):
I mean, it's just like a I don't know, just
kind of a reaction, like we're not once to necessarily
like call and talk on the phone if we're traveling
at the end of the day, but I've texted him
everything that's happened that day, you know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (31:40):
No, I think that Allen and I are not like
that at all. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (31:43):
I started noticing that that's different from people. That's why
I bring that up because I had pointed out with
some other like just cheer mom froms At one point,
I'm like, oh, you talked him at the end of
the day, and she's like, yeah, I'm updating them through
my day. I was like, oh, like I've you know's
everything that's happened today. Yeah, we kind of do. That's
kind of what we do.
Speaker 2 (31:58):
And I'm like, can you believe you know, Like I
kinda yeah, but I don't. We also like I miss
really big pieces of his business and stuff because it's
moving so fast, and.
Speaker 1 (32:08):
I do miss like business stuff. Now. We used to
talk about business stuff a lot, but we kind of
like that.
Speaker 2 (32:12):
I love talking business with my husband.
Speaker 1 (32:14):
I used to. I'm glad we don't as much anymore. Yeah,
it's aggervational business. So I'm just like, I don't even
want to know half the time. So now I think
it's just better that I just don't even know what's
going on a lot of the time because it'll frustrate me.
Speaker 2 (32:26):
Business pressing is hot to me. Yeah, you know, like Preston, Preston,
I do need to do. We do like talking business, like, okay, data,
tell me about that cod like if.
Speaker 1 (32:34):
He has like a business thing or whatever. I'm like, ooh,
you should do this or that, Like I do love
that stuff to have a good brain. And so maybe
we would talk more about that on date night now
because we don't during the day.
Speaker 2 (32:44):
I need a date night. Kimora Lee Simmons reacts. It's
to shock of daughter Aoki Lee dating a man who
is forty four years older. So she's opening how she
(33:07):
really felt about her daughter twenty one then dated a
sixty five year old back in twenty twenty four. She
tells the host on this podcast that she found it
predatorial but wants to let her daughter make her own mistakes.
They recently were not recently, but they briefly spent time
together in twenty twenty four before parting ways. As a mom, ladies,
(33:30):
how would you handle that situation?
Speaker 1 (33:31):
Did you say? Twenty one and sixty five?
Speaker 2 (33:33):
Yeah? Yeah, forty four years apart?
Speaker 1 (33:37):
Wow? Wild, that's hard. I mean, what can you actually
do when they're a twenty one year old? Not much,
but I can promise you I'm giving my opinion.
Speaker 2 (33:49):
Yeah, do you think is an acceptable gap?
Speaker 1 (33:53):
That's not it for me. I hate I mean, and
the come out I just I think a lot of
it is that you're still so close to eighteen, like
you're not far removed from still being a child. So
that does feel I'm sorry, I agree, it feels a
little predatorial to me.
Speaker 2 (34:12):
Well think about it.
Speaker 1 (34:13):
We're gonna come with me for that.
Speaker 2 (34:14):
But I have been born and I've lived to you
guys know me in this moment in forty four years.
Speaker 1 (34:19):
Yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 2 (34:20):
That is a huge that is eight I mean, he
has kids, he's had, you know, grandkids.
Speaker 1 (34:27):
It's hard. That's hard.
Speaker 2 (34:28):
That's a really big gap.
Speaker 1 (34:29):
Having said that, if my daughter said, I hear you,
I hear what you're saying, I still choose I would
never cut anyone out. I would never not be kind,
I would never not do any of those things. But
I would definitely be very honest.
Speaker 2 (34:42):
Yeah, I mean, man, I thought my seventeen year gap
was a Yeah, it was a big one. And then
you look at like, you know, David Foster and Katherine mcpee,
their difference is thirty four to thirty five years. But
isn't she thirty something years old? Well, David Foster's seventy five,
she's forty, So I don't know.
Speaker 1 (34:58):
Why that's also a little different. She just still feels
so young at twenty one.
Speaker 2 (35:03):
Yeah, I think it's like it seems to me that
it would be easier. Like when I look at Catherine David,
I'm like, they're adorable together like that. It's yeah, so
what it's thirty plus years, But when it's twenty one,
I see, like that's tough. But I also understand that
they have to make their own their own choices and decisions.
But I would definitely voice my concern.
Speaker 1 (35:24):
I mean there's a lot even past that. It's like,
you're still only twenty and they're gonna you know, I
mean children and getting old and there's just a lot
there that will affect a life.
Speaker 2 (35:36):
There's still just such a baby.
Speaker 1 (35:38):
Yeah, that's tough.
Speaker 2 (35:39):
Marciano Brunette sues Secret Lives of Mormon wives dem after
sexual assault claims. So In the legal document obtained by
US Weekly Our Friends February. On Friday, December fifth, vander
pump Villas Starr said they that he was falsely described
as a sexual predator, allegations which he has damaged his reputation.
(36:02):
The legal team says basically that he insisted any physical
interaction between them was consensual. So, guys, what does your
take on all this. Have you did you finish watching?
Speaker 1 (36:13):
I did not, Okay, I am up on like what's
going on with them or whatever though.
Speaker 2 (36:18):
Because to me is very much like you know, and again,
I think any woman feels scared to come out than
to not be believed in this situation. So that's that's
where it's just like, so they had, but also I
get someone's if it wasn't sorry, you know what I mean,
because then it also does ruin people's reputation too.
Speaker 1 (36:36):
And now we just you know, it's so hard because
once something is said on any way, it kind of
just gets taken. And I've never been a fan of
like suing for things. I'm just like, we're so soue
happy now, but how else do you kind of clear
your name in situations?
Speaker 2 (36:52):
Now?
Speaker 1 (36:52):
You know, that's kind of your only way sometimes.
Speaker 2 (36:55):
Are they the two I might be getting my Mormon
wives confused? Are they the two that had they the
fair alleged affair. No, that was Jesse and Marciano. Okay,
thank you to May apparently also had kissed, but she
said that there was some unwanted touch as well, and
Marciano said that it's absolutely not the case and so
she's come out to say that she's, you know, he
(37:16):
been sexually assaulted by him, and now he's saying that's
not the case. And now my reputation is being ruined
because you said X, Y and Z. Well, how does
that feel for him? I'm wondering because he did the
same thing to Jesse. He said that they had sex
and then later said that they didn't.
Speaker 1 (37:31):
Oh yeah, good point feels a little can ruin reputations? Yeah,
and things right said right, And that's just what I
think people forget and we as consumers hear it and
think it as fact, no matter kind of what it is,
you know. I mean, I'm not just saying because obviously
I believe a girl when they say that they've been done,
just saying, no matter what it is, you hear it,
(37:52):
you kind of take it as fact. Well, this is
what happened. Sure, So how do you prove how do
you prove any how do you prove what it's true
in any of that?
Speaker 2 (37:59):
You known't know. That's tough, but it's not lost on
me that he said, yeah, that's interesting, really untrue things,
And now that he's dealing with people saying untrue things.
Speaker 1 (38:09):
Well, we're allegedly true. Yeah, it's all allegedly right.
Speaker 2 (38:13):
My sons are twins, but one of them has special needs.
His brother used to be super protective of him. As
we have entered teenage years, his brother has gone from
his protector to almost his bully to maybe feel more
included with the other kids. He doesn't want him hanging
out with him and his friends as much as as
much and excludes him. We have had many conversations in
(38:34):
working with a therapist, but I thought I would see
if you had any advice. I think it's hard to
give advice on a situation we haven't lived at all. Also,
I know twins have an interesting dynamic no matter the circumstances,
because I've had friends that are twins and it's been
(38:54):
both ways. I've had a twin sisters, two sets of twins,
and one of the sisters they can't even breathe without
each other and it's so cool to me. And then
the other ones have said like I always hated that
I shared a day and felt like everything we did
was shared, and I never got to be an individual.
And so I think developmentally it's probably tricky as a
(39:18):
teenager to go. I really do want my friends and
I want to be my own person, and also, of
course he loves his brother, and then to add the
special needs layer is probably extra hard. But I don't
have the situation, so I don't know that I have
any room to give advice. But maybe this is the
(39:40):
point in life where they both get to make their
own friends, and you focus on them making their own
friendship circles and becoming more individual and it's not that
one's left out if the other one can maybe plug
in somewhere else, Yeah, that you have more of this
age group.
Speaker 1 (39:55):
I think when it comes to that a it's important
to always go back to is it bullying or excluding?
I think that's important how you play on the words.
Is he actually bullying his brother? And if he is
addressed that immediately that's unacceptable. We can't have that. If
it's excluding, then clearly this twin probably wants to have
(40:17):
his own friendships and that's something that's going to have
to be helped and nurtured on the other side, especially
with special needs, and maybe there's times to say, hey,
you can have this time with just your friend, but
this time I need you to include your brother because
he doesn't have anybody or he doesn't have this right now,
and I think that there's ways to just really just
(40:37):
gonna have to walk it with them and really help
guide how they have to handle that. But knowing that
bullying is never okay, but then wanting to have only
friends and not always having to include your brother is
also okay.
Speaker 2 (40:51):
So fine line, we walk that fine line with that
piece of it where it's because there's it's all girls
in our neighborhood, yeah, at Jolie's age, and it is
just I mean, there are so many fourth grade girls
in this neighborhood and there's only one boy that's in
first grade. And so obviously Jolie has a lot of
her friends over here all the time, and it's Jace
feels left out. And so but I've noticed that I
(41:13):
have been like, let let your brother play, but it's like, no,
she also needs that time too with her friends. And
so it's finding all right, Jayce, what can we do
special together? Or let me see if I can get
you play date over or but then also remembering, hey,
so you now we've had you know, his other buddies
come over and they're up there, and I think having
them happy in the same space but saying like, remember,
(41:33):
like be kind to your brother, be nice, because we
don't want anyone to feel feelings, hurt or feel left out.
Speaker 1 (41:40):
Yes, absolutely as a whole. So I think that applies
here perfectly as well. But ladies, well we.
Speaker 2 (41:48):
Sure got it out system. Get to clean and ladies,
and yeah, we'll see if we all survive the next
the next May day. Oh, our family survive is the question?
Speaker 1 (42:01):
Real quick? I do have a quick question though, And
did you do no phone Sunday?
Speaker 2 (42:05):
We could not because Alan had to work. Ok, we
are going to Okay, so we are going to It
is still on the stage. He's going to be gone
for a minute, and then when he's back, we're going
to do great. Yes, I have a big news pin
but I'm pinning for two weeks. Oh oh, I know,
I don't so yeah, see you next week. Bye,
Wind Down with Janet Kramer and iHeartRadio podcast.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
Hi ladies, Hi, Hi, who wants to just hop right in?
Speaker 1 (00:12):
I get a whine about it, but we're gonna wait.
Speaker 2 (00:14):
So I think, can I get.
Speaker 1 (00:17):
Like a wine day? That seems depressing, But.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
You know it's so funny, is we were we were
on the phone chatting about Oh no, you texted the
whole group. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, well kat oh, I
just love you guys so much. We're really I think
we're all just really trying to navigate December.
Speaker 1 (00:33):
What happened? No, I just thought it was cute.
Speaker 2 (00:35):
Because I was coming on the chat to just like,
you know, to say what I wanted to say to
you guys. And then I was like, I'm gonna pin
all of it. So I moved that whole text over
to my notes and just pinned it. And then I
was like that, and then I started making marks next
to things that would be an overshare and then I
might regret later. You mean, like everything, Wait, was I on?
Speaker 1 (00:57):
Was I on the text? Yeah?
Speaker 2 (00:58):
So then you before or you even knew, you would
have no way of knowing I did that. You said
I have something I need to talk about, and then
you go never mind, I'm saving for the podcast. And
I was like, that's my girl. Okay, so you've got
something too, I do, and it's a wine it is okay,
let me think of a host Charlie Fast Wait, guys,
I say there's a suite. This is very shout out specific.
I won't say her last name. But I didn't realize
(01:20):
that people are binging us that have just found this podcast,
and it feels so cozy to me. So Lauren has
been dedicated to all of Wine Down and she is
almost caught up, I know. And she said, I don't
know what I'm gonna have to do when I have
to wait a week. Oh that's so sat and I
love that. So Lauren, I love you, and I think you're.
Speaker 1 (01:41):
That's the way I would do it, like TV. I
love it.
Speaker 2 (01:43):
Yeah, it's been ging it all. Yeah, I thought it
was really cute. So I get about why. I just randomly,
you know, our social girl. She'll send you know, follows
and whatever, and a lot of times it's very much
like three thousand follows, three thousand unfollows, you know. So
it's like there's no real true game. I couldn't know
those things right. Well, the funnest. I was like, I
(02:05):
wonder what it's been like in the last ninety days,
and it was like twelve thousand unfollows for forty thousand follows.
So I'm like, okay, you know, so it's but it's
one of those things where I we lose, so we
are getting, we are gaining, Yeah, listeners that can to
to you know, to hear us or whatever. And the
(02:26):
last week's episode, I can't you guys so much joy
because of all when they kept saying I'm a Catherine,
I'm a Christen, I'm a Jana in the group, and
like this has been like oh Catherine's face talking about
sexual stuff. And then even Alan so funny he walked
in he goes REPG. So it's like and it's I
(02:48):
always know, it's really funny to me. The ones that
he listens to, like when he sees the clip that
you know funny, Yeah, President, I actually a download, thanks babe.
He goes Yesterday's in the living your and he goes, well, baby,
you're just you're sharing a lot. I'm down, And I said,
just tumble, little baby. I can't tumble hush, You're going
(03:10):
to get.
Speaker 1 (03:10):
Any comfortableness in my face and my laugh and everything
about that. I just was dying laughing all over again.
Speaker 2 (03:18):
I had the mcdeale moment where you just opened up
that door and jump if you wanted out the thing.
Speaker 1 (03:23):
It's so funny about all of that. I was thinking.
I was like, it all makes me so uncomfortable that
like no one would ever know truly, you know what
I mean, Like no one would never know if I
wasn't gee you know what I mean? Because you are
makes me so uncomfortable. I would never talk about it.
And that's actually gave me a lot of satisfaction watching that,
because the truth is is I just don't like to
(03:44):
talk about it.
Speaker 2 (03:45):
Yeah, you're like a lady in the streets the sheep.
Speaker 1 (03:48):
I'm just saying. It just really made me laugh because
I was like, no one will ever know.
Speaker 2 (03:51):
Okay, anything you want to share.
Speaker 1 (03:53):
No wed from that conversation.
Speaker 2 (03:55):
But I do, you know, as the your ends, and
we'll have more of a you know, a the appreciation
piece with the podcast, but you know we do. It's
fun to make people laugh and then have the the
deep combos too, which we really cover, which we really
get to.
Speaker 1 (04:13):
It is definitely my favorite to be the I'm I'm
the Catherine, I'm the Jana. It's just so fun because
that's what's so great about us. We all have such
different personalities and.
Speaker 2 (04:23):
We hold our man that way, which I like, like
we can agree, we can also just disagree, which I like.
Speaker 1 (04:28):
I wonder what the roller coasters like binging it though, Oh, it's.
Speaker 2 (04:36):
Because I had another husband, like the urn, because that's
a train wreck. So spoilers spoiler alerts. It's not a
train wreck. What it was is a beautiful vulnerability. That
is the one thing I think you've taught me. I've
(04:57):
said it before, but you the way you own in
the past and your drive for love I think is
so admirable. And it just like it lets people also
feel those things and say those things out loud, so
you should not it was not a train wreck. Well,
I think what's intriguing? This is better co host than him.
But yes, I will say one thing. I will Yeah,
(05:19):
I will defend my ex husband in this. He was
really good with guests. He had really great guest questions.
I'm in the table, my comment, go ahead, Well go
for it.
Speaker 1 (05:28):
Oh now I'm curious.
Speaker 2 (05:29):
Oh, he's good with guests all over today we'll probably
got it. It's fine, but I will say like that
is where like he was a good interviewee.
Speaker 1 (05:39):
Sure, Yeah, I thought he was great on the podcast.
I truly did. Yeah, and this is coming from you
know I I truly thought he was great on it.
I think he was. He's good with people, he's good
at speaking, you know, all of those things. What was
hard it was knowing when y'all hated each other so much,
and not really hated each other, but you know, but
had been fighting or whatever, something had happened. Then y'all
have to get on that couch and it's just you know,
(06:02):
and people probably can't hear that as they're listening through,
as much as it's hard for us to.
Speaker 2 (06:06):
It is interesting though. And I had a very introspectful
moment because I obviously I had a birthday last week
or when this airs it'll be like two weeks or whatever.
But and I get really introspective for the right word, Yeah,
on my birthday, I get emotional pretty much every year
I have this, and I don't and I know I'm
(06:28):
not alone and that I have spoken to other people
that have felt that same emotion that they have on
their birthday. But I'm this type where and it doesn't
help too when it's like shut or fly will be
like here's your memories the last you know, and it's
so interesting, and I know this is just again something
that I was just it's not even a conversation. It's
more of just like a thought. But the birthdays past,
(06:51):
you know what I mean, because when you get older.
So now I'm forty two and I think about where
I was at thirty two, you know, or where I
was at twenty two, and it's just the roads that
we've taken some not the ways that I wish I
would have went down, you know, but it's just I
get in this. I sat in a bit of a
(07:12):
funk on my birthday. Not because I'm not happy where
I'm at. I'm very happy, but there is that sometimes
it feels like time was wasted and I suffer in
that where it makes me sad that like I know
how precious life and time is. That it's like God,
(07:33):
if I could I don't regret it, but if I
could get a redo again, even though if I could
end up kind of where I'm still at, I don't know.
It's like and I know that's kind of saying two things.
That's no. I I completely agree because there is a
piece of like I'm starting to hit it. I'll be
forty four soon, and I'm going, well, wait, there's all
these things like that I don't want to break up
(07:56):
with yet that I haven't tried yet, and I've done so.
But then I've done so many things. But then I
also have paused life for you know, a decade with
a husband before Preston, and you know, like a stay
at home mom part of life, and all of those
things are beautiful and fruitful in all their own ways,
(08:16):
but it also is like, well, shoot, can you start
over at forty four? Like can you go chase a
career that you always thought you'd have? Well, I hope so,
because I don't still have the career that I want
to have. Yeah, in this moment. I had it in
certain periods of my life, like in my twenties when
I was working on One Tree Hill. The forties are also
what I wanted, right, So it's like, I hope we
(08:37):
can still chase Yeah, the forties are also And I
don't know if y'all are feeling this, but it's a
really strange, like the people we admired and loved, like
even as celebrities are getting older or they're passing away
people that I thought were forever going to be that
age in my brain, you know. And then there's also
a part of me that watches, like our pairs get older.
(09:00):
You know. Preston's parents are ten years older than my mom,
and so they're getting older, and then you realize you're
getting older. But I don't feel like I'm in my forties,
So it's such a it's like a oh, whoa, whoa whoa,
Like I start to understand that the time slow down
feeling that people have. Have you guys watched that Ja
Kelly George Clooney movie that just came out, No, So
we watched it last night also as Adam sand lerne
(09:22):
but you know where we're like, oh, like he's you
can tell physically obviously that he's getting older, you know.
But that whole movie was about essentially like you know
that movie with matthe McConaughey, whereas the Christmas a Ghost
of a Christmas past or whatever, and it was almost
like that with his life, the j Kelly character, And
(09:43):
that also made me start thinking about how I was
feeling on my birthday was all the decisions that we
make and then where we're at and that's sixty year old,
you know. So it's like, Okay, we still have a
good chunk. I pray, you know, who knows that we
could something could happen today or tomorrow, Like we still
hopefully get that good chunk to to do now what
(10:04):
we know better today, but also we might have I
might never get back on the show that I want
to get back on or something so, but to then
still be grateful for those experiences and not be sad
to not be where I want to be. So I
think that's the piece too, where it's like even my husband,
like he was at the top of his career in
(10:25):
England coaching, he might not ever give that get the opportunity.
Instead of being sad, it's like holding space for like
how great was that to be a part of something
so great? But where I always go to is I'm like,
I'm not where I want to be. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (10:39):
I think it's also hard because that can be so
different in different things of your life, because like your
family could be exactly where you wanted it to be,
but then not be happy with where your career is
or vice versa, or you know whatever. So it's holding
space for both of those. Just because you can be
a little disappointed that something's not the way that you
wanted it to be doesn't mean you're unhappy. Does not
(10:59):
mean that you're not happy in other areas of your life.
I think that that's important to remember, sure, and shouldn't
be looked over.
Speaker 2 (11:05):
Yeah, it's just it's the people that when I think
of like the seven years that I just was like
grinded in that, and I'm like, could I, yes, I
could have shortened that time period and I put so
much just like immense amount of just like so many
birthdays quote unquote, and years were wasted like fighting for
(11:27):
something that like I was, I was never going to
battle through that. We were never going to get through that,
you know. And it's like thinking of, like the year
is wasted, knowing how precious each year is now, but
you also got a book, like you wouldn't be able
to write the way you write or speak the waste.
I think. I just get like really reflective. I am
emotionally reflective on my birthday and it happens every year.
(11:50):
I can't escape it. I just get emotional and like
nothing will be good enough on my birthday and that's it. Well,
it's okay to just know that, Yeah, I don't know.
I also wish for I know, we have a lot
of like really young people that listen, and I just
love them so much. But I really wish if I
could tell them and old like younger me something it
would be like to not worry and just really know
(12:14):
that you're living in some of the best days of
your life while they're happening. Because part of my I
don't even like the word regret, but for lack of
a better term, is just thinking like did I really
soak it up the way I so that like I
remember like even being on the radio and and like
loving it, but then wondering, Okay, could I go to
the station next, or could I do that? Or do
I want to be a news anchor? And then I
(12:34):
did road Rules and I was like, this is incredible,
but I was worried about what they thought of me
and how they would they want me to do another show.
And I don't feel like I like fully enjoyed everything
the way I wish I could have or should have
while I was in it. So maybe that is the
piece of wisdom to pass on to people that aren't
in their forties. It's hard, though, to do that, like
even today, Like even when I do a movie now
and like enjoy every moment because it's three weeks and
(12:56):
then you're gonna be out, you know, And it's still
hard when you're in that moment.
Speaker 1 (13:00):
Yeah, no matter how old you are, it happens to
me all the time. I'm like, why am I not
just enjoying this versus getting like upset about something or
you know whatever it is.
Speaker 2 (13:10):
Well, sorry for a reflective moment. I I love your
reflective moment. Here's to forty two Part two. That's why
I'm calling it. I like you part two. We're having
a part two.
Speaker 3 (13:19):
Baby, are we ready to whine about it?
Speaker 2 (13:35):
I think we all got something on our list.
Speaker 1 (13:37):
I'm just gonna do mine real quick, because we don't
know it does not have to be quick. Well, it's not.
We've probably talked about this before, but I'm just from
our text yes, because I was like, shit, I mean.
Speaker 2 (13:50):
Okay, hold on a second, let me just We're just
going to give you a little inside tea to our
dear angel Cha. I just it's the I knew it
was good because you don't typically use this kind of line.
Speaker 1 (14:00):
It's just funny because we had just talked about that.
Speaker 2 (14:03):
We're talking about doing getting together and then she said.
Catherine's like, well, I'm coming over, and I said, fantastic.
Speaker 1 (14:13):
You have to say where the all right?
Speaker 2 (14:17):
Basically I said December twenty third, wind down lunch after podcasting.
Kristin goes, yes, Catherine goes, love we still doing party?
She was we still doing party on the fifteenth, by
the way, I said, oh god, I don't know, ha ha,
but I'm ha ha. She goes, Okay, well I'm coming over,
so and then I said, fan fantastic. Kristin goes. That
made me laugh out loud. I said what we all
(14:38):
need right now. Catherine goes, you know what's actually hilarious. Actually,
I'll save it for the podcast. KB goes save it.
She goes, all day I have been pinning and then
trying not to let hormones determine my overshare. That was
our That is way better because that's just so us
and go.
Speaker 1 (14:55):
And the reason I say that is because we had
just had this conversation and I'm not going to say
who as talking about it, but someone we were just
having a conversation about the cleaner's coming. Okay, let's just
talk about it.
Speaker 2 (15:05):
I'll say it. Okay, this is me because I'll say
it right now.
Speaker 1 (15:09):
I wasn't sure.
Speaker 2 (15:10):
It's fine. I'll totally out myself. And this happened on
my birthday. I and that's I will never have the
maids come on my birthday again. I'm a psycho when
the maids come, I just am every other Tuesday. Because
the deal is is that everyone in my household things.
The maids put things away. They don't. We have to
put it away for them to clean, because if not,
(15:32):
they will lift up the thing and they'll wipe under
it and they'll put it down. So that is why
when everyone's like, why is mom a psycho on May Day? Well,
because I have to put everything away. We clean for
the cleaning people. This is Preston's biggest argument. And it's like,
well you're always so strossedtone like yes, because I need
to like this has to be put everything needs to
be put away. But and now they all know, I'll
(15:56):
just say that.
Speaker 1 (15:57):
They're all aware, do they know?
Speaker 2 (15:59):
Well we'll see next Tuesday.
Speaker 1 (16:00):
Okay, Well, so forward, I go out of town. Our
cleaners come every other Monday. It says on Monday, cleaners come.
It says on Sunday clean for cleaners. Okay, However, I,
in the way that I work, send a reminder text
Sunday morning that says, hey, make sure the house is
(16:21):
clean for cleaners tomorrow. I get there when the cleaners
are there, this house is a disaster.
Speaker 2 (16:27):
As they're cleaning, I already asked for what.
Speaker 1 (16:30):
He literally lost my mind. And I wasn't even still
on my period.
Speaker 2 (16:38):
I'm just say I was like seven days waiting for
mine late, so like I was already.
Speaker 1 (16:42):
Like already, but it wasn't even that. I didn't even
feel that rage. I felt like utter like disrespect, like sorry,
I love you, but like is what it is I
have never felt. So I was just like, and then.
Speaker 2 (16:55):
The you will say honey, I love you, because he's listening.
Speaker 1 (16:59):
If it's a clip, I do love you. And you're
great at a lot of things. It used to be
a great cleaner. I don't know what he used to
be cleaner than me. But I mean, so they're there,
they've already done the upstairs, have already skipped half the
shit because there's stuff everywhere.
Speaker 2 (17:12):
Because they won't. Yeah, because obviously that's not their job. No,
I have photos, y'all.
Speaker 1 (17:17):
I mean I literally because he literally responds to me,
I cleaned for hours, and I'm like, I'm not sure
what I'm not sure what happened, and I'm sure he did,
but I'm like, the so come to find out, which
this is a lesson for everyone in my home. People
were responsible, as they should for different spots. Right, Well,
Emmy's out of town, her rooms clean before we left.
(17:39):
Cayden puts Ramsey in charge of the second back half
of the bonus room, which couldn't be more obvious in ever.
But I'm like, so, now I have a sixteen year
old and a forty whatever four year old man blaming
the nine year old for not cleaning.
Speaker 2 (17:53):
Look at look, look, I just look after.
Speaker 1 (17:58):
How hard is it?
Speaker 2 (18:00):
I cannot tell you how validating it is. I was
made to feel like a true psycho for my psychonists.
Speaker 1 (18:06):
No, you guys clean, y'all.
Speaker 2 (18:08):
This is the most validating moment I've had in a
long time, because Preston, we you know, we lost Saint Christine,
and so I immediately said I'm going to get I
haven't had cleaning people in the years, they've come one
time before a party, like, but that's it. And so
I said, I'm going to treat yourself. Is that still
a thing? I thought, I'll bring them back and that
(18:30):
will just make me feel like good, you know, twice
a month.
Speaker 1 (18:33):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (18:34):
No one in my home understands cleaning for the cleaning people,
no one. And I also respect my cleaning people so
much and their time these people have, so that's what
other things to do. They have other homes that they've
committed to. They can't spend hours cleaning up.
Speaker 1 (18:49):
Yeah, like, you just disrespected the three cleaning ladies in
our house and me, I mean, granted, I was not
what did they say? I mean, you know, at first
Nick was like, oh I cleaned for hours, blah blah blah.
But then when I started sending photos, He's like, I understand,
that's my bad.
Speaker 2 (19:03):
I should have looked to make sure I'd admit that.
Speaker 1 (19:05):
Yes he did. And then Ramsey was responsible for that,
and I'm like, you are sick. You could you help
me out and just go and he was like, yeah,
my bad. And I when I went into his closet,
I'm like, when you clean your room the closets included,
which this is all three of my children, so just
just like all the dirty clothes and the I'm like,
bring it in the laundry. But this also goes too.
It was funny, and that's why I had to say,
this is really freaking hilarious. After we just had this conversation.
(19:27):
But then the conversation come up of you sprung it
on me. That was the conversation that was had this morning.
He goes, well, you kind of sprung it on me,
and I go, it's on the calendar, everybody, Well, I
don't look ahead. Well on Sunday it says clean for
the cleaners, like I don't know, and the text and
I will it is a Sunday morning.
Speaker 2 (19:43):
It is kind of frustrating because I've even made comments
so now on Monday, because I know every other Tuesday
the cleaning lady will come. So on Monday, I will
I will start putting things away and be like okay,
because I don't want to be a psycho. On Tuesday morning,
you know when the kid are out, because they come
at eight in the morning. Right when the kids are
I'm bustling them out of you know, to get to
(20:04):
the bus and stuff, busting them back to the door.
And so I try to start doing it Monday, putting
things away that are on the counters or in the
kids room, playrooms or whatever. And it's like, yeah, so
you're not crazy tomorrow, and I'm like, well, I would
like to not be if I could have a little help,
you know.
Speaker 1 (20:19):
And they'll start all ganging up on you.
Speaker 2 (20:21):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (20:21):
Yeah, and all the kids will start and it's like, no, no, no.
Instead of letting us get to that place, why don't
we all see it hear it and start helping.
Speaker 2 (20:29):
Yeah. The best part. He's like, well, I don't know
what what I'm supposed to do. He's like, because I
don't know where the sheets are. And I go, well,
this is a really fun fact, man. I go every
room as a basket and it's labeled sheets. So I said,
what happens is is I then take those sheets. He's like, well,
how do I know which one sheets?
Speaker 1 (20:46):
I go.
Speaker 2 (20:47):
They're all color coordinated, I said, which is great. So
it's like they're all the same color, all the same pillowcases.
I said, So you take those sheets and you just
plup them on their bed, you know. So I'm like,
that's I guess it just doesn't actually get any easier
than that.
Speaker 1 (21:01):
And that's the thing. And then I started thinking it
would have gotten done in the sense that the cleaners
would have come and it would have been clean ish,
but like, I want it better. I think that's my thing.
Like there are certain things where I'm like, it just
is what it is, and that's fine and it's no
big deal. But then there are certain things where I'm like, no,
I think it just needs to be better. A very
good example was also while I was gone, oh sorry.
Speaker 2 (21:24):
When KK is in these moods, it gave me life.
Speaker 1 (21:28):
I explained to him something that has always been the
case about when Ramsey goes to bed and when she
puts herself away, and the response was, you're just better
at this than I am. And I was like, I
think that's supposed to be a compliment, not what I
want to hear. It's not about being better. Just do it, Like,
just do I know what the thing is? Like I don't.
(21:50):
I don't I but I don't get it nothing. He
didn't respond, yeah, because I think he probably felt like
I wanted to fight, because sometimes I do, but truthfully,
I just want it to be done right.
Speaker 2 (22:01):
And I also just don't like, oh I'm deciding to
whether I'm saying this.
Speaker 1 (22:09):
I mean, I just attacked my husband for about twenty No, no, no,
it's not that.
Speaker 2 (22:12):
It's not to diminish so I'm gonna save. I'm just
gonna say I have worked my ass off my entire life.
I worked through college. I built a resume that was
so epic, you know, And and I decided, we as
a family, decided to table that so that I could
(22:33):
do I could steward well the gifts inside of our house.
And I everyone knows that I love and enjoy that responsibility.
And I also deserve the respect that I'm not made
like this isn't I'm not. I didn't do all that
so that I could throw away a string cheese wrapper
that it's literally above the garbage can because you couldn't
(22:54):
open the garbage can. Like that's not it's just not
fair to me. So it's like disrespectful. It's how I
always feel. It feels like you don't value me, and
that is the bigger feeling. And that's why I'm psycho.
Is not psycho, it's just going like are you kidding me?
Is this really? Like? No one else it goes wow.
You know, Like I remember doctor Phil said something decades ago.
(23:18):
I've always been an og doctor Philler, and this is
literally I was probably like in my twenties. He said,
if you wake up in the morning as a husband
and you say how can I make my wife's day better?
And the wife wakes up in the morning and says,
how can I make my husband's day better? You are
bound for greatness.
Speaker 1 (23:31):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (23:33):
All I want to do is just have people wake
up and go like I'm always thinking how I can
make their day better?
Speaker 1 (23:37):
Yeah, who's thinking about me?
Speaker 2 (23:40):
I know Preston brust is. I know he is. I
know he is, and it's in different ways, in different languages.
And but I have never been really an act of
service gal and maybe I'm just turning into one.
Speaker 1 (23:49):
Maybe it's changing.
Speaker 2 (23:50):
I think what I do appreciate Catherine, what you're saying though, too,
and I totally hear what you're saying as well, KB.
But with you asked him days ahead of time, put calendar.
I think that's the part where it's like I don't
know how else I could have. It's like I don't
feel seen, I feel heard, and that peace as a
woman it's like I've already said, it's not like you were.
(24:11):
You weren't making Nick read his mind, read your mind,
and that's the death that we have all done as women.
Read my mind for what I need to happen right now. Okay,
so my husband actually didn't know. He's like, well, the
maids back in Scotland, in England, they put everything away,
so that's I was like, okay, well, that's not how
it is here. That's how it's never been for the
last two years of you living here, which is why
(24:32):
you know so, but now you know, so maybe there'll
be something you know. But with you, it's like you
you he Nick knows this, you know, and you gave
him reminders. And that's the part as women where we
go to, I gave you reminders. Now you didn't even acknowledge.
Now I feel disrespected, I don't feel seen, I don't
(24:53):
feel heard, and now I'm frustrated. So it's kind of
frustrating that then they'll maybe get upset about a reaction. Yes,
because hello, we have then a right to be frustrated
that we have set it up so beautifully in this
lovely package for you.
Speaker 1 (25:08):
Yep. Yeah, and it's not like I usually don't. I mean,
I usually have them help me. But I guess the
reality is I do the majority of it, you know.
So then it's like, and that's fine.
Speaker 2 (25:17):
We like our we like to actually put things away
where they actually go.
Speaker 1 (25:21):
Right, But I just I want everyone to help me.
Speaker 2 (25:23):
I do.
Speaker 1 (25:23):
I want everyone to help me, and they did.
Speaker 2 (25:25):
Then it's not all on us. That's why I keep
telling them a little compound interest.
Speaker 1 (25:29):
I'm not even that picky, but maybe that's why I've
gotten it to this point too. You know, part of
me looks at it. I'm like, Okay, I do kind
of clean up after them, or I don't make them all.
I mean, I make them clean their rooms. I do
they do chores stuff like that. But like I'm like,
we're going to have to just like start over. I
don't know my kids are hold Like, I don't even
know at this point. No, But anyway, so I came
home to that and I literally cleaned while the cleaning
(25:49):
ladies were there when I was tired when I got home,
and I was just not very happy about it.
Speaker 2 (25:54):
Well, girl, that is an amazing wine. And I feel
validated in my because I was again made to feel
like just such an ungrateful Yeah, personally, and.
Speaker 1 (26:04):
I know we go a little crazy, but also like
just help.
Speaker 2 (26:07):
Yeah yeah, but we're not going together. We're not going
crazy for no reason. That's always my thing. I'm not
just flying off the handle being a psycho. Right, I
know this, And this is what I told Alan to
and you know, you know the kiddos, it's actually Mommy's
not upset that she's cleaning. It's how Mommy feels about
not being understood or seen in this moment. So it's
(26:28):
not about the cleaning. I don't mind cleaning. I love cleaning, right,
It's that I am feeling like it's all falling on
my shoulders, which then makes me feel disrespected, not seen. Yeah,
and not appreciating that.
Speaker 1 (26:39):
I don't do well with feeling like it's all on
my shoulders. Yeah, I definitely I acknowledge that. And some
women do some women actually enjoy that. I mean, I
don't know if they enjoy it, but I do have
friends that like choose for it more to be that way.
That's never been us, that's never been our relationship. We've
you know, that's just not how we work.
Speaker 2 (26:57):
So to start now, Wow, a New Year's resolution for
the family. Yeah, would you like to? I got ghosted
by my cleaning ladies, so I don't know.
Speaker 1 (27:09):
I had some valuable feedback.
Speaker 2 (27:12):
I don't know if we're going to be together. It
was a wild time. She used the microwave but didn't
clean it. Isn't that weird?
Speaker 1 (27:18):
I mean, I've had complaints about all of my complete
I almost texted you to ask.
Speaker 2 (27:22):
For yeah now, but you know, will they ever do
it that?
Speaker 1 (27:28):
You know?
Speaker 2 (27:28):
We are right? We're well. I just thought it was weird.
I'm like, a strange thing to use one's microwave, considering
you're probably only wants to use it. Creamer, what's your wine?
Speaker 1 (27:38):
You know what?
Speaker 2 (27:38):
It happened again on my birthday. But it wasn't It
didn't involve it didn't involve us, so my wine. It
was just it bothered me and I and I almost
wanted to say something to the person next to me,
which I didn't, but I wanted to. I have I
get really upset for so one, Like there was a
(28:01):
couple next to us at dinner that were clearly on
a date, husband and wife, probably been married. Let's just
say for a while, you know what I mean, Like
I'm sure they've been married for a while. But the
amount of times that the husband took his phone out no,
during the date. And it's not like he was like
and I was like, Okay, maybe he's a doctor, you
know what I mean, maybe this is maybe it is
(28:25):
so I knows the cheeks was like he's right there,
and so I'm just like a lean back. He's just
on Instagram. No, you know what I mean, he's not
a doctor. Like no, And but like literally the amount
of times. And what I did then was I looked
at the wife and the wife is just like, you know,
putting her head down, like looking away, but like it
(28:45):
made me sad, Like it makes me sad, and I
wanted to be like, dude, put your fucking phone down,
and like why you're on a date with your wife? Like,
I don't know, it really bothers me? Does that bother
you guys? No? I just imagine Alan having a whine
about it. It was like I took jan out for birthday
dinner and all she did was he at the table,
which is really bad to me. I'm really have a
(29:07):
love I actually just have a hate hate with the phone.
I know that the phone is an essential piece of
our business, specifically with my husband. It is he doesn't
have an office, he doesn't have a computer. This is
an hour and fifteen minutes so during a dinner. But
that's it. We just we're just be like, hey, sorry,
I want to check make sure that the sitter is good,
you know what I mean, Like I'll do that every
once in a while, just to make sure that baby's down. Yeah,
(29:29):
you know, but the just like scrolling in a date.
I don't cat.
Speaker 1 (29:33):
I know you Like, I mean, I'm kind of bad
about it, so I can't say a whole lot, but it.
Nick's not terrible at that. The kids can be, though,
And so I've started to notice that. I'm like, all right,
I'm talking to you and I and Emmy did point
out to me one time, she's like, you're not very
good at either. I was like, you, you are so right,
I'm not. I am trying to teach you so y'all
will be better at it. But like I need to
be good too. But I have really started if I'm
(29:55):
even if she's on it already, because a lot of
time she'll already be on it and I'll start talking. Yeah,
She's like, but I was already doing something, and I
was like, totally understand, So why don't you say, hey,
just give me one second, let me finish doing that,
and then put it down. So I'm trying to teach
them to do better, and I am trying when people
are talking to me to do better. But if we're
just like sitting there, I am bad at scrolling. Even
on a date, I try not to be Oh god,
(30:17):
it's been so long since we've even been on a date.
Speaker 2 (30:19):
I feel like, oh, when's the last date night you've had?
Speaker 1 (30:24):
A wedding? That was all we've definitely had.
Speaker 2 (30:27):
Oh well yeah, yeah, but one.
Speaker 1 (30:30):
Yeah, it's been a while.
Speaker 2 (30:31):
It's been a long time for us.
Speaker 1 (30:32):
I mean dinner, you know, like when the kids aren't home,
like we'll just run and get dinner. But it doesn't
feel like I can, you know. But I do try
to do better at it. But if like we're both
like not in a conversation, I think we'll kind of
naturally just pick it up sometimes and then just kind
of naturally put it down.
Speaker 2 (30:47):
Like I'm good for silence when it's at like if
we're in a date or whatever. Yeah, but if it's
like a prolonged silence, I start to go really heady,
and I'm like, do we not have anything to talk about?
Like you know that is so you I'm like, why
is what do we even talk about? Like is it
not interested in one? Like yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 1 (31:03):
I just think keep run out of things to talk about. See.
Speaker 2 (31:07):
That's where I'm like, That's how I feel sometimes, I
totally because we just talk five day when things talk,
when things happen, I think, yeah, see, and we're never
going to run out because we never see each other.
Speaker 1 (31:19):
Yeah maybe, And I mean truly, it's like a I
text in the moment when anything happens, So once we
get to the end of the day, it's like it's like.
Speaker 2 (31:27):
I love that you do that we already the kind of.
Speaker 1 (31:31):
I mean, it's just like a I don't know, just
kind of a reaction, like we're not once to necessarily
like call and talk on the phone if we're traveling
at the end of the day, but I've texted him
everything that's happened that day, you know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (31:40):
No, I think that Allen and I are not like
that at all. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (31:43):
I started noticing that that's different from people. That's why
I bring that up because I had pointed out with
some other like just cheer mom froms At one point,
I'm like, oh, you talked him at the end of
the day, and she's like, yeah, I'm updating them through
my day. I was like, oh, like I've you know's
everything that's happened today. Yeah, we kind of do. That's
kind of what we do.
Speaker 2 (31:58):
And I'm like, can you believe you know, Like I
kinda yeah, but I don't. We also like I miss
really big pieces of his business and stuff because it's
moving so fast, and.
Speaker 1 (32:08):
I do miss like business stuff. Now. We used to
talk about business stuff a lot, but we kind of
like that.
Speaker 2 (32:12):
I love talking business with my husband.
Speaker 1 (32:14):
I used to. I'm glad we don't as much anymore. Yeah,
it's aggervational business. So I'm just like, I don't even
want to know half the time. So now I think
it's just better that I just don't even know what's
going on a lot of the time because it'll frustrate me.
Speaker 2 (32:26):
Business pressing is hot to me. Yeah, you know, like Preston, Preston,
I do need to do. We do like talking business, like, okay, data,
tell me about that cod like if.
Speaker 1 (32:34):
He has like a business thing or whatever. I'm like, ooh,
you should do this or that, Like I do love
that stuff to have a good brain. And so maybe
we would talk more about that on date night now
because we don't during the day.
Speaker 2 (32:44):
I need a date night. Kimora Lee Simmons reacts. It's
to shock of daughter Aoki Lee dating a man who
is forty four years older. So she's opening how she
(33:07):
really felt about her daughter twenty one then dated a
sixty five year old back in twenty twenty four. She
tells the host on this podcast that she found it
predatorial but wants to let her daughter make her own mistakes.
They recently were not recently, but they briefly spent time
together in twenty twenty four before parting ways. As a mom, ladies,
(33:30):
how would you handle that situation?
Speaker 1 (33:31):
Did you say? Twenty one and sixty five?
Speaker 2 (33:33):
Yeah? Yeah, forty four years apart?
Speaker 1 (33:37):
Wow? Wild, that's hard. I mean, what can you actually
do when they're a twenty one year old? Not much,
but I can promise you I'm giving my opinion.
Speaker 2 (33:49):
Yeah, do you think is an acceptable gap?
Speaker 1 (33:53):
That's not it for me. I hate I mean, and
the come out I just I think a lot of
it is that you're still so close to eighteen, like
you're not far removed from still being a child. So
that does feel I'm sorry, I agree, it feels a
little predatorial to me.
Speaker 2 (34:12):
Well think about it.
Speaker 1 (34:13):
We're gonna come with me for that.
Speaker 2 (34:14):
But I have been born and I've lived to you
guys know me in this moment in forty four years.
Speaker 1 (34:19):
Yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 2 (34:20):
That is a huge that is eight I mean, he
has kids, he's had, you know, grandkids.
Speaker 1 (34:27):
It's hard. That's hard.
Speaker 2 (34:28):
That's a really big gap.
Speaker 1 (34:29):
Having said that, if my daughter said, I hear you,
I hear what you're saying, I still choose I would
never cut anyone out. I would never not be kind,
I would never not do any of those things. But
I would definitely be very honest.
Speaker 2 (34:42):
Yeah, I mean, man, I thought my seventeen year gap
was a Yeah, it was a big one. And then
you look at like, you know, David Foster and Katherine mcpee,
their difference is thirty four to thirty five years. But
isn't she thirty something years old? Well, David Foster's seventy five,
she's forty, So I don't know.
Speaker 1 (34:58):
Why that's also a little different. She just still feels
so young at twenty one.
Speaker 2 (35:03):
Yeah, I think it's like it seems to me that
it would be easier. Like when I look at Catherine David,
I'm like, they're adorable together like that. It's yeah, so
what it's thirty plus years, But when it's twenty one,
I see, like that's tough. But I also understand that
they have to make their own their own choices and decisions.
But I would definitely voice my concern.
Speaker 1 (35:24):
I mean there's a lot even past that. It's like,
you're still only twenty and they're gonna you know, I
mean children and getting old and there's just a lot
there that will affect a life.
Speaker 2 (35:36):
There's still just such a baby.
Speaker 1 (35:38):
Yeah, that's tough.
Speaker 2 (35:39):
Marciano Brunette sues Secret Lives of Mormon wives dem after
sexual assault claims. So In the legal document obtained by
US Weekly Our Friends February. On Friday, December fifth, vander
pump Villas Starr said they that he was falsely described
as a sexual predator, allegations which he has damaged his reputation.
(36:02):
The legal team says basically that he insisted any physical
interaction between them was consensual. So, guys, what does your
take on all this. Have you did you finish watching?
Speaker 1 (36:13):
I did not, Okay, I am up on like what's
going on with them or whatever though.
Speaker 2 (36:18):
Because to me is very much like you know, and again,
I think any woman feels scared to come out than
to not be believed in this situation. So that's that's
where it's just like, so they had, but also I
get someone's if it wasn't sorry, you know what I mean,
because then it also does ruin people's reputation too.
Speaker 1 (36:36):
And now we just you know, it's so hard because
once something is said on any way, it kind of
just gets taken. And I've never been a fan of
like suing for things. I'm just like, we're so soue
happy now, but how else do you kind of clear
your name in situations?
Speaker 2 (36:52):
Now?
Speaker 1 (36:52):
You know, that's kind of your only way sometimes.
Speaker 2 (36:55):
Are they the two I might be getting my Mormon
wives confused? Are they the two that had they the
fair alleged affair. No, that was Jesse and Marciano. Okay,
thank you to May apparently also had kissed, but she
said that there was some unwanted touch as well, and
Marciano said that it's absolutely not the case and so
she's come out to say that she's, you know, he
(37:16):
been sexually assaulted by him, and now he's saying that's
not the case. And now my reputation is being ruined
because you said X, Y and Z. Well, how does
that feel for him? I'm wondering because he did the
same thing to Jesse. He said that they had sex
and then later said that they didn't.
Speaker 1 (37:31):
Oh yeah, good point feels a little can ruin reputations? Yeah,
and things right said right, And that's just what I
think people forget and we as consumers hear it and
think it as fact, no matter kind of what it is,
you know. I mean, I'm not just saying because obviously
I believe a girl when they say that they've been done,
just saying, no matter what it is, you hear it,
(37:52):
you kind of take it as fact. Well, this is
what happened. Sure, So how do you prove how do
you prove any how do you prove what it's true
in any of that?
Speaker 2 (37:59):
You known't know. That's tough, but it's not lost on
me that he said, yeah, that's interesting, really untrue things,
And now that he's dealing with people saying untrue things.
Speaker 1 (38:09):
Well, we're allegedly true. Yeah, it's all allegedly right.
Speaker 2 (38:13):
My sons are twins, but one of them has special needs.
His brother used to be super protective of him. As
we have entered teenage years, his brother has gone from
his protector to almost his bully to maybe feel more
included with the other kids. He doesn't want him hanging
out with him and his friends as much as as
much and excludes him. We have had many conversations in
(38:34):
working with a therapist, but I thought I would see
if you had any advice. I think it's hard to
give advice on a situation we haven't lived at all. Also,
I know twins have an interesting dynamic no matter the circumstances,
because I've had friends that are twins and it's been
(38:54):
both ways. I've had a twin sisters, two sets of twins,
and one of the sisters they can't even breathe without
each other and it's so cool to me. And then
the other ones have said like I always hated that
I shared a day and felt like everything we did
was shared, and I never got to be an individual.
And so I think developmentally it's probably tricky as a
(39:18):
teenager to go. I really do want my friends and
I want to be my own person, and also, of
course he loves his brother, and then to add the
special needs layer is probably extra hard. But I don't
have the situation, so I don't know that I have
any room to give advice. But maybe this is the
(39:40):
point in life where they both get to make their
own friends, and you focus on them making their own
friendship circles and becoming more individual and it's not that
one's left out if the other one can maybe plug
in somewhere else, Yeah, that you have more of this
age group.
Speaker 1 (39:55):
I think when it comes to that a it's important
to always go back to is it bullying or excluding?
I think that's important how you play on the words.
Is he actually bullying his brother? And if he is
addressed that immediately that's unacceptable. We can't have that. If
it's excluding, then clearly this twin probably wants to have
(40:17):
his own friendships and that's something that's going to have
to be helped and nurtured on the other side, especially
with special needs, and maybe there's times to say, hey,
you can have this time with just your friend, but
this time I need you to include your brother because
he doesn't have anybody or he doesn't have this right now,
and I think that there's ways to just really just
(40:37):
gonna have to walk it with them and really help
guide how they have to handle that. But knowing that
bullying is never okay, but then wanting to have only
friends and not always having to include your brother is
also okay.
Speaker 2 (40:51):
So fine line, we walk that fine line with that
piece of it where it's because there's it's all girls
in our neighborhood, yeah, at Jolie's age, and it is
just I mean, there are so many fourth grade girls
in this neighborhood and there's only one boy that's in
first grade. And so obviously Jolie has a lot of
her friends over here all the time, and it's Jace
feels left out. And so but I've noticed that I
(41:13):
have been like, let let your brother play, but it's like, no,
she also needs that time too with her friends. And
so it's finding all right, Jayce, what can we do
special together? Or let me see if I can get
you play date over or but then also remembering, hey,
so you now we've had you know, his other buddies
come over and they're up there, and I think having
them happy in the same space but saying like, remember,
(41:33):
like be kind to your brother, be nice, because we
don't want anyone to feel feelings, hurt or feel left out.
Speaker 1 (41:40):
Yes, absolutely as a whole. So I think that applies
here perfectly as well. But ladies, well we.
Speaker 2 (41:48):
Sure got it out system. Get to clean and ladies,
and yeah, we'll see if we all survive the next
the next May day. Oh, our family survive is the question?
Speaker 1 (42:01):
Real quick? I do have a quick question though, And
did you do no phone Sunday?
Speaker 2 (42:05):
We could not because Alan had to work. Ok, we
are going to Okay, so we are going to It
is still on the stage. He's going to be gone
for a minute, and then when he's back, we're going
to do great. Yes, I have a big news pin
but I'm pinning for two weeks. Oh oh, I know,
I don't so yeah, see you next week. Bye,
Host
Jana Kramer
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