He Ignored Me Thru It All

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
It is time now for today's Strawberry Letter, and if
you need advice on relationships, dating, work, sex, parenting, and more,
please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVEYFM dot com
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it could be yours.

Speaker 2 (00:21):
It could be yours. Buckle up and hold on tight.
We got it for you. Here it is Strawberry Letter.

Speaker 1 (00:26):
Thank you, nephew. Subject he's ignored me through it all
here Stephen Shirley. My fiance can be very evil when
he does not get his way. He's used to having
all of my attention, but since I moved my younger
sister in, he's had an attitude because I have to
spend a lot of time with my sister. She's pregnant
and my mom can't deal with her, so I took

(00:48):
her in. My husband was on board at first, but
now he's upset all the time. He thinks my sister
should be pulling her weight around the house, and I
don't want her to do too much because she's young
and having a high risk pregnancy. My husband ignores me,
her and our dog. When he gets an attitude, I
can hold an entire conversation with him and he ignores me.

(01:12):
If we're having sex, he's totally engaged, but will not
open his mouth. I have done that for the last
time because it crushes my spirit. He's passionate and doing
all of the things, but he won't say a word,
so it makes me feel like a tramp. I cooked
a big birthday meal for him Sunday and he ate
dinner with us and didn't say one word. He got

(01:34):
up and washed the dishes in silence. The next day,
my sister had a doctor's appointment that I couldn't take
her and that I couldn't take her to because of
her work. He took her and they rode in total silence.
My sister said next time, she'd rather take the bus
and ride in a hostile car. I told him that
he was dead wrong for ignoring her. He looked at

(01:56):
me while I was talking, but didn't say a word.
I do not know what's going on in his mind
to make matters worse. My family is involved now since
my sister is living with me. His behavior is very hurtful.
Steven Shirley, how can I get through to him so
he'll stop all this nonsense. Well, I don't know that

(02:17):
you can get through to him because you are engaged
to a child and you're calling him your husband too,
So I'm assuming you guys are planning to get married
at some point. At the beginning of the letter, you
say my fiance because I don't know what grown man
walks around the house not speaking What women do that
I know, but not men. They can't hold it for

(02:39):
a long time. You see, you did say he was
on board with your sister moving in at first, but
now he has a problem with it because he's not
getting enough attention. He sounds just so immature. The one
thing about women is that we're nurturers naturally, and we're
going to take care of way more than just one

(03:00):
at a time. And that's what you're doing with your younger,
pregnant sister. It's just what we do as women. We
take care of people. You said you're still having sex
with him, you're still talking to him, and you're cooking
for him. Right, Well, he doesn't even talk to you.
How does this work? He said your sister should be
pulling her weight, But come on. She's in a high

(03:22):
risk pregnancy. She could lose a baby, or something could
go wrong in the pregnancy if she's under too much stress.
He shouldn't have agreed to her staying there. That's what
he just shouldn't have done that in the first place,
since he's acting a fool now. The good thing is
that this situation won't last forever. She will have the
baby one day and she needs you right now. But

(03:45):
this has shown you who your fiance or your husband
really is and how he treats you when he doesn't
get his way. So believe him and know that marriage
is not going to change who he is.

Speaker 2 (03:57):
Steve couple of first in this letter, I know a
guy like that. Yeah, and it ain't. No relationships worked
out for him. No, he old fool by hisself right now,
still still. I see him every now and then. Cool dude,
But he when it comes to a relationship, he don't

(04:19):
get it. Because relationship, you have to have relations Yeah,
you have to be able to relate to someone else.
That's really what we're talking about. He doesn't have a skill.
He's missing a major skill set. It's called communication. It's

(04:39):
called it being in touch with your feelings. This is
he's stupid. You know you're saying your fiance can be
very evil. I get you can call it evil. We man,
this dude right here, he next level. Evil is not
the word, it's it's something else. I don't know if
I found it yet. He's used to having all my attention.

(04:59):
But I had to move my younger sister in because
she's in pregnancy and mother couldn't deal with it. She's
in high risk pregnancy, so she took her in. Your
husband was on board at first, but now he's upset
all the time. Now he thinks a young lady should
be pulling her weight around the house. She says she

(05:23):
don't want her to do too much because she's in
a high risk pregnancy. Okay, now he don't understand that,
right See, bruh, are you listening? Pregnancies are difficult anyway.
Every woman I've ever seen have a baby, they carry
it well. But it looks challenging. Hey, I couldn't do it,

(05:48):
and I already know I couldn't, so it looks challenging.
But then to get it laid out that you are
now in a high risk pregnancy, that's scary for a
woman to be caring a baby and to know something
could possibly go wrong or be wrong. That's rough man.
That is so rough. Dog and my husband ignores me,

(06:13):
her and our dog when he gets an attitude. Well,
it seems to be all the time. I can hold
an entire conversation with me, he ignores me. If we
having sex, he's totally engaged, but will not open his mouth.
Have done that to me for the last time because
it crushes my spirit. He's passionate and all the things
he's doing, but he won't say a word. So it
makes me feel like a tramp. What is wrong with

(06:34):
this dude? Right here? Yo, dude, stopid hang on.

Speaker 1 (06:40):
See we'll have part two of your response coming up
at twenty three minutes after the our Today's Strawberry Letter
subject He's ignored me through it all. We'll get back
into it right after this. You're listening hard morning show.
Come on, Steve, Let's recap today's Strawberry letter. The subject
He's ignored me through it all?

Speaker 2 (07:00):
Your fiance. What you're calling him? Is something wrong with him?
He's just off. Basis This dude right here rapp too good?
He's ignoring you through it all. He don't talk to he.
She didn't have to move her sister in because she
having a high risk pregnancy. He want her, the young girl,
to pull her weight around the house. She don't want
to do it much because she's in a high risk pregnancy.
Now what man don't understand that? I mean, look, we've

(07:23):
all looked at pregnancy and not knowing what it is.
It does look very very challenging. I mean, I take
my hat off when I see a woman walking around
with the stomach can and making another human being, which
only they can do. And then and then to have
one that's high risk, meaning you could be caring a
baby where something could go wrong or might be wrong.

(07:44):
That's that, And every moment of the day they got
to think about this man. So dog pull up, what's
wrong with you anyway? And he's entire You can have
an entire conversation with him. He ignore you. If you're
having sex. He's totally engaged, but he won't open his mouth.
I didn't done that for the last time because it
makes me feel like a tramp. Wow, why dog cut

(08:07):
him off? Why you had stopped having sex with somebody?
Ain't talking to you? How did he get to sex?
What'd y'all say for that boy, man bye. I cooked

(08:28):
a big birthday meal for him Sunday and he ate
dinner with us and did not say a word. He
got up washed the dishes in silence. The next day,
my sister had a doctor's appointment. I couldn't take her
cause of work. He took and rolled in total silence. Man,
your man, it's stupid, And my sister said next time
she rather to take the bus and ride in a

(08:49):
hostel car. I told him that he was dead wrong
for knowing her. He looked at me while I was talking,
but he didn't say a word. I do not know
what's going on in his mind to make matters words.
My family's involved now since my sister's living with me,
his behavior is very hurtful, Steven Shirley, How can I
get through to him so he can stop this nonsense?
Why are you trying to marry this man? Why you

(09:12):
live with it? Okay, first of all, let me give
you some advice. You're getting a clear picture of who
he is. Now, let me ask you something else. What's
gonna happen when the big thing start happening? How he
gonna handle the big stuff? Because right now, your sister,

(09:32):
just moving in temporarily, that's all. He ain't talking to
nobody in the house, y'all having sex. He ain't talking
y'all through He ain't talking you Cooch, your birke birthday dinner.
He ain't talking. Ain't nobody said thank you, nothing. He
just over there, just grunting and swallowing, breathing. Stupid. This

(09:53):
dude is stupid. Man, I'm gonna tell you some First
of all, he's self centered, very self centered. He only
sees and it's about him. You said it at the
top of the letter. He said he's used to having
all my attention, well a lot of things in life.
It's going to require other attention. Go elsewhere. And this

(10:14):
is how he asks when he gets it. And y'all
ain't even got to the big stuff. What would happen
if something happened to your parents? What are you gonna do?
I think he's a narcissist, But here what I really think.
I think he is a serial killer. I'd be thinking. I

(10:38):
think I'd consider moving out real So what you need
to start doing is looking out in the garage. Just
walk through the garage. If you see any hefty bags,
you see a roll of duct tape. If you see
a new boat.

Speaker 1 (10:54):
How did you get that? Come to that boat?

Speaker 2 (10:57):
Is keyp. Well, he ain't talking. He ain't talking, yeah,
but he thinking something now. Yeah, So if you think,
if you because you constantly have to think, if you're
not gonna talk, So if you're constantly thinking, what is
he thinking that he can't say, yeah, you gotta start
thinking about this. Something is going on in his mind,

(11:18):
and it ain't good. I'm telling you it ain't good
because I would consider. I mean, look, lady, you got
to start. You gotta add, you gotta do the math
on this. But go out in that garage and look around,
open his trunk. Make sure it ain't nothing coming in
the house. You know, if you get a new deep freezer,
you might want to look at that. What just a

(11:41):
new deep freezer? All ain't got that much meat. But
if you just got to see a new deep freeze outside,
just something you need to consider.

Speaker 1 (11:51):
But she did say, you're right. She did say, I
do not know what's going on in his mind.

Speaker 2 (11:56):
I'm telling you it's a lot going on. And he
ain't saying is he started digging around in the backyard.
You better start looking at all this hell. You know,
you see any you see any cylinder blocks laying around,
bungee cords. I'm just telling you stuff you need to
start looking for you bags and seement, you need to

(12:17):
start looking heavy chains, gotta start looking. Tell you right now,
get on his computer. Look through the history. See what
he's looking up. You know Sign nine. You see stuff
popping up.

Speaker 1 (12:31):
You know, I just don't know how he can do this.

Speaker 2 (12:35):
Just look up, look look up at how to kill
your sister in law. Look look at all this stuff up.
That'd be searchers. They'd be finding this on people's phone,
on the people's computer. I'm just telling you need to
be careful, all right, all right.

Speaker 1 (12:50):
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(13:10):
listening to this Dave Harvey Morning Show