May 1, 2024 • 13 mins
Dear Steve and Shirley, I'm twenty eight years old and dating a man that is five years older than I am. We've been together for eight months and he's someone I can see myself settling down with. He doesn't have any children, so that's a plus for me. The only issue we have is that he has sex with other ladies. He told me that even though he has sex with other women, I'm the only one he spends his time and money. He said, he doesn't want to cheat on me, so he's just getting some things out of the way before he settles down. We talk about marriage and having children together, and he wants to be married before he's forty..........................................................
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
It is time for today's Strawberry Letter, and if you
need advice on relationships, work, sex, parenting, and more, please
submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HAARVEFM dot com by
clicking submit Strawberry Letter. We could be reading your letter
live on the air, just like we're going to read
this one right here, right now, and you never know,
it could be yours.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
It could be yours. Buckle up and hold on tight.
We got it for you here. It is Strawberry Letter.
Speaker 1 (00:26):
Thank you nephew. Subject he needs to freshen up everything.
Dear Uncle Steve and Aunt Shirley. I'm twenty eight years
old and dating a man that is five years older
than I am. We've been together for eight months and
he's someone I can see myself settling down with. He
doesn't have any children, so that's a plus for me.
(00:48):
The only issue we have is that he has sex
with other ladies. He told me that even though he
has sex with other women, I'm the only one he
spends his time and money. He said, he doesn't want
to cheat on me, so he's just getting some things
out of the way before he settles down. We talk
(01:08):
about marriage and having children together, and he wants to
be married before he's forty. I need to know if
I should give the relationship more time or if I'm
wasting my time. See, I've stayed at his house and
I can tell another female has been in his bed.
I can tell a female has been wrapped up in
the blanket on his couch. I have even seen dirty
(01:29):
towels with makeup on them. I have told him that
he should freshen up before I come over, but I
guess he doesn't have the time. He acts like it's
no big deal, but it does matter to me. I
feel like I don't have a choice but to share
him with other women. But it makes me feel dirty
because an older lady told me about soul ties and
(01:50):
supposedly every time I sleep with him, I get tied
to the souls of all the women he slept with,
or something like that. I want to be in a
monion's relationship, and I do not plan to share him forever.
He gave me the key and the code to his alarm.
So what's really going on with him? Is he serious
(02:10):
about me? Come on, now, some of this stuff you
know isn't right. Okay, he's seeing other women for starters?
You say, the only issue that you have with him
is that he has sex with other ladies. What this
is a major major issue because it's not what you
(02:30):
want and you're not happy. Why are you even considering
being with this man? I mean, you're twenty eight. You
say he's five years older than you. So he's thirty three,
and he wants to get married before he's forty. So
between now right now today and forty years old some
time in between there he'll still be with you. But
sleeping around with other women, I mean, makes this make
(02:52):
sense because he said he wants to get it all
out before he settles down. No, you don't have to
read with any of this. The soul ties all that.
I don't know anything about that, But you don't have
to deal with this. You do have a choice in
this matter. If you don't want to share him, tell
him that and get out. You said you want to
be in a monogamous relationship. Well this is not what
(03:16):
you're in. Plus his house is dirty and nasty.
Speaker 2 (03:19):
Ew Steve, all right, all right, they listen to me again.
Here is the new norm that we are being forced
to accept with our line of thinking. That makes sense
for us to give you some foundation. You're twenty eight,
(03:43):
you're dating a man that's five years old, and you
that's thirty three. Y'all been together eight months, and he's
someone I could see myself settling down with. Now, this
statement right here, this is someone I could see myself
settling down with. I'm gonna read the letter back to you.
I don't want you to tell me how how you
see something here, because I'm struggling. I'm struggling for you.
(04:07):
You can see yourself selling down with him. He don't
have any children, so that's a plus for me. Okay.
The only issue, y'all listening, The only issue is that
he has sex with other ladies. I beat, damn, only
I be damn. That's the only issue, you know. The
(04:30):
only issue is he ain't worth it. The only issue
is he domestice is credit up. The only issue is
he just got a divorce. The only issue is he
doesn't have a real solid plan. He told me that
even though he has sex with other women, I'm the
(04:50):
only one he spends his time and money on. Little girl,
listen to me. All sex costs time and money, all
of it. Even though he has sex with other women,
I'm the only one he spends his time and money on.
He gotta be all one of them to have sex.
Speaker 1 (05:15):
One more time.
Speaker 2 (05:18):
He told me that, even though he has sex with
other women, I'm the only one he spends his time
and money on. To have sex. He got to be
on one of them other women. Okay, And to get
on a woman, it's gonna take some time, you sir,
(05:40):
and some money. Ain't no sex free. So now that's
not a true statement. He said, he doesn't want to
cheat on me, so he's just getting some things out
the way before he settled down. He don't want to
cheat on you.
Speaker 1 (05:58):
What do you think he's doing?
Speaker 2 (06:00):
What? I don't understand. What is this that you see
in settling down with He told me he don't want
to cheat on you, but he doing it anyway. He
just ain't got your stupid behind to think that if
I tell you I'm seeing these people, it ain't cheating. Well,
then it's not because you are complicit. You are having
(06:22):
a consensual sexual relationship with a man that's involved with
other women, and you okay with that. Well, if you
okay with it, he real good with it. Man.
Speaker 1 (06:40):
All Right, Steve, hang on, we'll have part two of
your response coming up at twenty three minutes after today's
Strawberry letter, subject he needs to freshen up everything. We'll
get back into it right after this. You're listening Morning show,
All right, Come on, Steve, let's recap today's Strawberry letter.
The subject he needs to freshen up every thing.
Speaker 2 (07:01):
Dear uncle Steven, un Shirley. I'm twenty eight. I'm dating
a man five years old than me. He thirty three.
We've been together eight months and you can see yourself
settling down with him. He don't have no children. That's
a plus. The only issue, and he'll go to, issue
we have, is that he has sex with other ladies.
That's not an issue, like I told you. An issue
(07:21):
is he lost his job. An issue is his card
broke down. His issue is he messed his credit up.
His issue is he was recently divorced. Them is issues.
He done brought a whole nother lifestyle in here to you,
and you'd a bit long with it. He told me
that even though he has sex with other women, I'm
the only one he spends his time and money on.
(07:42):
How can that be true? It takes time and money
to have sex, that's a fact. He says, he don't
want to cheat on me, so he's getting some things
out the way before he settles down. Before he settled down.
When the man told you he want to be married
by the time he fought it, that's seven years. That's
a lot of time to swing and slang. Lady, we
(08:05):
talked about marriage and having children together, and he wants
to be married before he forty. Did you hear what
he just told you? I want to be married before
I'm forty. He done created a seven year window that
he can play with you. Keep you on the strain,
waiting on forty. I need to know if I should
give the relationship more time, if I'm wasting your time,
(08:27):
or if I'm wasting my time. Okay, but let me
read a little bit more fake. See, I've stayed at
his house and I can tell another female has been
in his bed. You ain't got to tell, he told you. Wow,
you ain't got to tell. He ain't. I could tell
the females been wrapped up in the blanket on his couch. Okay,
he ain't even move a blanket. I've seen dirty times
(08:49):
with makeup on him. He ain't even putting them in
the Washington shit. I have told him that he should
freshen up before I come over, but I guess he
don't have the time. No, lady, it ain't the time.
He don't care. He'd have told you what he doing.
And you have complied and are complicit with it. You
are what's called an accessory, an accomplice. There's a crime
(09:12):
being committed, and you're an accessory and accomplished to the crime,
and you okay with it. You see the evidence, the
blanket on the couch, the makeup on the tiels that
had any earrings, in the bed, and you crawling your
stupid self up in there, thinking you won't spend your
life with this man. He acts like it's no big deal,
(09:34):
but it does matter to me, and he don't give
a damn. I feel like I don't have a choice
but to share him. What What What made you say that?
What made you say you feel like you don't have
a choice. You can stop this right away if you
get off being stuck on stupid. You have nothing, Nothing
(09:58):
belongs to you. He's giving you nothing. He's given you
no commitment, he's given you no promises. Y'all having false talks.
I won't get married by time. I'm forty thirty three,
wow the other women. But it makes me feel dirty
because here we go and older woman told me about
(10:20):
soul tithes and supposedly every time I sleep with him,
I get tied to the souls of all the women
he slept with or something like that. Where you get
this ignorant ass voody from what isnbody? God? This is
the only thing you know this show? Takeaway some old
ass woman that told you you having soul ties, that
(10:41):
every time you sleep with the woman you tied to
the souls in these other worlds? What raggedy ass voodoo
mess is this? This Mississippi Louise Ina caging hill billy
ass mess. Lady girl, All bye. I want to be
(11:04):
in a monogamous relationship, but you not. In order to
be in a monogamous relationship, you have to be in
a man that's willing to be monogamous you and a
man who's telling you he's cheating. He gave me and
a key and a cold to his alarm, so what's
really going on with him? Is he serious about me?
He gave you the key and the cold to his alarm,
so he ain't got to go down there and open
(11:24):
the door when you come in. That's all that is
he gave you, gave you the key and the cold,
so he ain't got to go down there. But you
can't go over there when you want to. Now you
got to call for you come back. I promise you.
Just when you come by, let me know you're coming,
and then he'll tell you whether to come or not.
(11:45):
And then when you do come, you got the key
in the cold because he ain't going down and letting
you in. Now, let me ask you something else. Here's
your other problem. I feel like I have no choice,
but it makes me feel dirty. Suppose every time I
sleep in the one that said now, listen to me.
This is all the stuff he's told you. But what
you need to be concerned about is what is he
(12:05):
telling these other women? Because I bet you he has
said this several times before and his work, and that's
why he doing it. He'd have told somebody else got
a key in a cold too, somebody else have been
on the couch watching movies, somebody else been in the bed,
and somebody else using a towel. Little girl, if you
(12:25):
don't get away from this, you gonna get hurt. You
gonna get hurt. Get out because this man, he's doing
nothing for you except using you, and I promise you,
he's doing this to several other women, and he got
you hanging on a hope that he gonna get married
by the time he forty, he thirty three, that's the
(12:46):
seven years. Are you kidding me? Sweetheart? Do yourself for favor,
find yourself something else to do, because your hope is
to be in a monogamous relationship, and that ain't his.
Speaker 1 (13:00):
All right, leave us your comments on Today's Strawberry Letter
on Instagram and FM, and check us out on the
Strawberry Letter podcast on the front of radio app We're free.
Never sounded so good. Coming up next, we got Junior
and Sports Talk. Right after this, you're listening to Harvey
(13:20):
Morning Show.
It is time for today's Strawberry Letter, and if you
need advice on relationships, work, sex, parenting, and more, please
submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HAARVEFM dot com by
clicking submit Strawberry Letter. We could be reading your letter
live on the air, just like we're going to read
this one right here, right now, and you never know,
it could be yours.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
It could be yours. Buckle up and hold on tight.
We got it for you here. It is Strawberry Letter.
Speaker 1 (00:26):
Thank you nephew. Subject he needs to freshen up everything.
Dear Uncle Steve and Aunt Shirley. I'm twenty eight years
old and dating a man that is five years older
than I am. We've been together for eight months and
he's someone I can see myself settling down with. He
doesn't have any children, so that's a plus for me.
(00:48):
The only issue we have is that he has sex
with other ladies. He told me that even though he
has sex with other women, I'm the only one he
spends his time and money. He said, he doesn't want
to cheat on me, so he's just getting some things
out of the way before he settles down. We talk
(01:08):
about marriage and having children together, and he wants to
be married before he's forty. I need to know if
I should give the relationship more time or if I'm
wasting my time. See, I've stayed at his house and
I can tell another female has been in his bed.
I can tell a female has been wrapped up in
the blanket on his couch. I have even seen dirty
(01:29):
towels with makeup on them. I have told him that
he should freshen up before I come over, but I
guess he doesn't have the time. He acts like it's
no big deal, but it does matter to me. I
feel like I don't have a choice but to share
him with other women. But it makes me feel dirty
because an older lady told me about soul ties and
(01:50):
supposedly every time I sleep with him, I get tied
to the souls of all the women he slept with,
or something like that. I want to be in a
monion's relationship, and I do not plan to share him forever.
He gave me the key and the code to his alarm.
So what's really going on with him? Is he serious
(02:10):
about me? Come on, now, some of this stuff you
know isn't right. Okay, he's seeing other women for starters?
You say, the only issue that you have with him
is that he has sex with other ladies. What this
is a major major issue because it's not what you
(02:30):
want and you're not happy. Why are you even considering
being with this man? I mean, you're twenty eight. You
say he's five years older than you. So he's thirty three,
and he wants to get married before he's forty. So
between now right now today and forty years old some
time in between there he'll still be with you. But
sleeping around with other women, I mean, makes this make
(02:52):
sense because he said he wants to get it all
out before he settles down. No, you don't have to
read with any of this. The soul ties all that.
I don't know anything about that, But you don't have
to deal with this. You do have a choice in
this matter. If you don't want to share him, tell
him that and get out. You said you want to
be in a monogamous relationship. Well this is not what
(03:16):
you're in. Plus his house is dirty and nasty.
Speaker 2 (03:19):
Ew Steve, all right, all right, they listen to me again.
Here is the new norm that we are being forced
to accept with our line of thinking. That makes sense
for us to give you some foundation. You're twenty eight,
(03:43):
you're dating a man that's five years old, and you
that's thirty three. Y'all been together eight months, and he's
someone I could see myself settling down with. Now, this
statement right here, this is someone I could see myself
settling down with. I'm gonna read the letter back to you.
I don't want you to tell me how how you
see something here, because I'm struggling. I'm struggling for you.
(04:07):
You can see yourself selling down with him. He don't
have any children, so that's a plus for me. Okay.
The only issue, y'all listening, The only issue is that
he has sex with other ladies. I beat, damn, only
I be damn. That's the only issue, you know. The
(04:30):
only issue is he ain't worth it. The only issue
is he domestice is credit up. The only issue is
he just got a divorce. The only issue is he
doesn't have a real solid plan. He told me that
even though he has sex with other women, I'm the
(04:50):
only one he spends his time and money on. Little girl,
listen to me. All sex costs time and money, all
of it. Even though he has sex with other women,
I'm the only one he spends his time and money on.
He gotta be all one of them to have sex.
Speaker 1 (05:15):
One more time.
Speaker 2 (05:18):
He told me that, even though he has sex with
other women, I'm the only one he spends his time
and money on. To have sex. He got to be
on one of them other women. Okay, And to get
on a woman, it's gonna take some time, you sir,
(05:40):
and some money. Ain't no sex free. So now that's
not a true statement. He said, he doesn't want to
cheat on me, so he's just getting some things out
the way before he settled down. He don't want to
cheat on you.
Speaker 1 (05:58):
What do you think he's doing?
Speaker 2 (06:00):
What? I don't understand. What is this that you see
in settling down with He told me he don't want
to cheat on you, but he doing it anyway. He
just ain't got your stupid behind to think that if
I tell you I'm seeing these people, it ain't cheating. Well,
then it's not because you are complicit. You are having
(06:22):
a consensual sexual relationship with a man that's involved with
other women, and you okay with that. Well, if you
okay with it, he real good with it. Man.
Speaker 1 (06:40):
All Right, Steve, hang on, we'll have part two of
your response coming up at twenty three minutes after today's
Strawberry letter, subject he needs to freshen up everything. We'll
get back into it right after this. You're listening Morning show,
All right, Come on, Steve, let's recap today's Strawberry letter.
The subject he needs to freshen up every thing.
Speaker 2 (07:01):
Dear uncle Steven, un Shirley. I'm twenty eight. I'm dating
a man five years old than me. He thirty three.
We've been together eight months and you can see yourself
settling down with him. He don't have no children. That's
a plus. The only issue, and he'll go to, issue
we have, is that he has sex with other ladies.
That's not an issue, like I told you. An issue
(07:21):
is he lost his job. An issue is his card
broke down. His issue is he messed his credit up.
His issue is he was recently divorced. Them is issues.
He done brought a whole nother lifestyle in here to you,
and you'd a bit long with it. He told me
that even though he has sex with other women, I'm
the only one he spends his time and money on.
(07:42):
How can that be true? It takes time and money
to have sex, that's a fact. He says, he don't
want to cheat on me, so he's getting some things
out the way before he settles down. Before he settled down.
When the man told you he want to be married
by the time he fought it, that's seven years. That's
a lot of time to swing and slang. Lady, we
(08:05):
talked about marriage and having children together, and he wants
to be married before he forty. Did you hear what
he just told you? I want to be married before
I'm forty. He done created a seven year window that
he can play with you. Keep you on the strain,
waiting on forty. I need to know if I should
give the relationship more time, if I'm wasting your time,
(08:27):
or if I'm wasting my time. Okay, but let me
read a little bit more fake. See, I've stayed at
his house and I can tell another female has been
in his bed. You ain't got to tell, he told you. Wow,
you ain't got to tell. He ain't. I could tell
the females been wrapped up in the blanket on his couch. Okay,
he ain't even move a blanket. I've seen dirty times
(08:49):
with makeup on him. He ain't even putting them in
the Washington shit. I have told him that he should
freshen up before I come over, but I guess he
don't have the time. No, lady, it ain't the time.
He don't care. He'd have told you what he doing.
And you have complied and are complicit with it. You
are what's called an accessory, an accomplice. There's a crime
(09:12):
being committed, and you're an accessory and accomplished to the crime,
and you okay with it. You see the evidence, the
blanket on the couch, the makeup on the tiels that
had any earrings, in the bed, and you crawling your
stupid self up in there, thinking you won't spend your
life with this man. He acts like it's no big deal,
(09:34):
but it does matter to me, and he don't give
a damn. I feel like I don't have a choice
but to share him. What What What made you say that?
What made you say you feel like you don't have
a choice. You can stop this right away if you
get off being stuck on stupid. You have nothing, Nothing
(09:58):
belongs to you. He's giving you nothing. He's given you
no commitment, he's given you no promises. Y'all having false talks.
I won't get married by time. I'm forty thirty three,
wow the other women. But it makes me feel dirty
because here we go and older woman told me about
(10:20):
soul tithes and supposedly every time I sleep with him,
I get tied to the souls of all the women
he slept with or something like that. Where you get
this ignorant ass voody from what isnbody? God? This is
the only thing you know this show? Takeaway some old
ass woman that told you you having soul ties, that
(10:41):
every time you sleep with the woman you tied to
the souls in these other worlds? What raggedy ass voodoo
mess is this? This Mississippi Louise Ina caging hill billy
ass mess. Lady girl, All bye. I want to be
(11:04):
in a monogamous relationship, but you not. In order to
be in a monogamous relationship, you have to be in
a man that's willing to be monogamous you and a
man who's telling you he's cheating. He gave me and
a key and a cold to his alarm, so what's
really going on with him? Is he serious about me?
He gave you the key and the cold to his alarm,
so he ain't got to go down there and open
(11:24):
the door when you come in. That's all that is
he gave you, gave you the key and the cold,
so he ain't got to go down there. But you
can't go over there when you want to. Now you
got to call for you come back. I promise you.
Just when you come by, let me know you're coming,
and then he'll tell you whether to come or not.
(11:45):
And then when you do come, you got the key
in the cold because he ain't going down and letting
you in. Now, let me ask you something else. Here's
your other problem. I feel like I have no choice,
but it makes me feel dirty. Suppose every time I
sleep in the one that said now, listen to me.
This is all the stuff he's told you. But what
you need to be concerned about is what is he
(12:05):
telling these other women? Because I bet you he has
said this several times before and his work, and that's
why he doing it. He'd have told somebody else got
a key in a cold too, somebody else have been
on the couch watching movies, somebody else been in the bed,
and somebody else using a towel. Little girl, if you
(12:25):
don't get away from this, you gonna get hurt. You
gonna get hurt. Get out because this man, he's doing
nothing for you except using you, and I promise you,
he's doing this to several other women, and he got
you hanging on a hope that he gonna get married
by the time he forty, he thirty three, that's the
(12:46):
seven years. Are you kidding me? Sweetheart? Do yourself for favor,
find yourself something else to do, because your hope is
to be in a monogamous relationship, and that ain't his.
Speaker 1 (13:00):
All right, leave us your comments on Today's Strawberry Letter
on Instagram and FM, and check us out on the
Strawberry Letter podcast on the front of radio app We're free.
Never sounded so good. Coming up next, we got Junior
and Sports Talk. Right after this, you're listening to Harvey
(13:20):
Morning Show.
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